#non Binary struggles

[finnslay]

Sigh

[cilli-paperthinclouds]

my fellow non-binary people I need your help on some struggles I'm having:

-5 years ago was the last time I wore a dress/skirt, it didn't look good but I felt pretty. now I feel like I can't wear a dress/skirt because i am not pretty and I shouldn't be pretty as a more masculine looking person.

-sometimes I think about growing out my hair but every time I decide against it because it would make me look "too" feminine. logically I know that it's a dumb thought but emotionally I am not there yet.

would love to hear your thoughts, experiences or tips!

[void-does-not-sleep]

Anyone else feel embarrassed to be trans? Like…I wear my name tag with my preferred name and my trans and pronouns badges on my hat at work and for some reason I feel so embarrassed. Especially because I’m pre T and I don’t even have my gender affirming haircut yet so I literally look like a regular cis girl to everyone. And even when I do get my haircut I fear it’s gonna be so obvious I’m trans and I won’t pass at all.

And then when I go out with my friends and try to dress masc (even if it’s just to feel slightly less dysphoric) I feel embarrassed even then cause I literally just look like a girl who’s a tomboy or something.

I try to deepen my voice at work when speaking to customers and my colleagues and it’s probably so obvious cause I can’t keep up with it for long and my voice ends up pitching anyway. I hate it. I don’t know what to do to help me feel less embarrassed.

[thepowerofthevoid]

Tw: Discussions of Trans Suicide and Mental health issues

Being Non-Binary (or in any other situation where you can't exactly pass as cis) sucks because just blend isn't really an option in our society so I essentially have two options

(A) Be out, correct people that don't recognise your gender CONSTANTLY. Deal with all the backlash that comes with that, (the ignorance, the weird stares and invasive questions ect.) and also accept that some people are so stuck in there norms they just won't learn and will continue to class you how THEY see fit.

(B) Don't disclose anything, endure being constantly being misgendered and let your mental health corrode slowly until you have a breakdown, rinse and repeat. All just to maintain safety and not be stigmatised.

-

And people wonder WHY the mental health amd suicide rate amongst trans youth is so high, when your constantly shoved between a rock and a hard place because your fellow humans beings won't treat you with the most basic sense of fucking dignity.

Don't even get me started on the harassment, seeing news articles advocating for genocide the lack of safety in the medical field, and fuck me all the "research" in trying to get us to not exist

I'm so fucking tired

[neohart]

Had to tell my mom that the package in the mail for me was a “bra” what she doesn’t know is that it makes my boobs-be-gone

[theonlyonefromsaturn]

no matter what i do and how hard i try to convince myself and the others even people who are close to me won't stop perceive me as /my assigned gender/. there is no way out of it, even if they love me and wish me no harm i _know_ how they see me and i know that me being non-binary changes nothing in their eyes. that realisation has been with me for a long time but this is the first time it made me _cry_ since i came out as nb, which mind you, was more than three years ago.

[sakanart80]

i want longer hair and smoother skin. I want a smoother body with less fat in my abdomen. I want to be able to fit in tighter feminine clothes. I dont want all this body hair and this weird and gross figure.i want boobs, but I don't want a vagina. I want to be androgynous, but here I am, still a man in your eyes.

[aman-duuh]

lesbianklok save me .. save me lesbianklok.....

[spookytransgirl]

So my birthday is coming (April 9th) and I really could use some help. Due to Long Covid and my pain disorders, I need help affording medications, food, and help affording bills. Whether boosting or donations actually help and everything is greatly appreciated <3

Pypal: screamboyty@gmail.com

Vnmo: @thespookygalpal Cshapp: $thespookygalpal

[a-being-of-chaossss]

Thinking back to a few weeks ago where my family and I went to a sushi restaurant and the waiter came up to our table and said "And for the boy?" and I gave her my order then took my hat off and she said "oh im sorry... miss?" and just got extremely confused cause she couldn't figure out if I was a boy or a girl and only got more confused when I responded "yes" to "are you a boy or a girl?". Honestly one of the most gender affirming things ever.

[genderimpala]

not attraction, not gender envy, but a secret third thing.

[void-does-not-sleep]

Sometimes I genuinely hate being genderfluid and I have moments where I really regret coming out.

For me personally…being genderfluid isn’t about using any pronouns but more about using all pronouns depending on how I feel.

For example, certain days I will identify as a boy, other days as a girl and some days as non binary.

I have days where I feel super masculine and I want to chop off all my hair and wear my binder to appear flat and have people use he/him for me.

Other days I’m comfy being feminine and wearing girly clothes and being called a girl.

But on days when dysphoria hits, getting misgendered hurts so much it makes me wanna rip my skin off and cry.

When I came out to my friend group which consisted mostly of trans people I seriously thought I’d feel supported but no, I feel the exact opposite.

I know I don’t exactly pass cause I can’t chop my hair off to appear more masculine/androgynous cause of transphobic parents but I still do my best to appear masculine on days where I feel like a guy, like wearing my binder and wearing masculine clothes. But that’s just isn’t enough. I still get misgendered. Still get called by my feminine name.

And I could just speak up about it

But…I don’t want to seem like I’m making it a big deal

Nobody else in the group seems to get misgendered

It seems to be just be the case for me.

And it makes me feel so shitty…almost like my identity it too confusing and i should just stop.

I can’t help that I feel this way.

I want to be a boy but I’d never medically transition.

But I also don’t mind being a girl but only on days where dysphoria isn’t a bitch

And it’s so confusing and I hate it

It makes me feel like I’m faking it

Like I’m not actually a real trans person

[rayclubs]

Nonbinary Heavy is so important to me as a concept. His ideas of gender presentation are vastly different from the traditional American ones. He grew up in a family of four women who engaged in tough physical labor as much as in more traditional household responsibilities. He goes by "he/him" out of linguistic convenience but these pronoun games mean nothing to him emotionally. He's big and strong, and he likes to play the protector of all things dear to him, but he also lost his childhood to a rough life full of challenges and must now be handled with care and gentleness like a precious flower. There is something beautiful about that.

[the-withering-system]

When you call the public gender clinic so often regarding your referral they now have a note on file saying to connect you to a specific nurse when you call 🙃

But hey, I have a number now! I'm in the next 100 paitients!!!

[juliewlters]

When you walked into the cabin that day on the boat, I was transported back twenty years in time, to when I was a boy of eighteen. Yes - a boy - not a girl. A boy I locked up in a box. I tried to push that boy back into his box. God knows, I tried to write you out of my system.

Daphne (2007) dir. Clare Beavan

[ohbuggy]

Magma doodles of them bc it’s nearly 6 and I am mentally unwell ❤️