#only for my mom to lose it a few months in 😭😭

[aturnoftheearth]

going to finally hopefully get my key fob replaced tomorrow after like 2 years without it and just using my spare key….. i’m so excited….

[delicatetaysversion]

slowly becoming everything i was afraid i would be: resentful and bitter

[ssparksflyy]

BUT I DONT WANNA DANCE, IF IM NOT DANCING WITH YOU ♡ !

pairing percy jackson x ballerina!reader summary (smau) just a few days in the life as a pro ballerina nd her loving bf ( ꈍ◡ꈍ) an guys i dont know anything abt ballet please dont come for me 😭 also!! first smau and first time writing in foreverrrrr

♡ liked by perseajackson, annie.beth, prettygirlpipes, hazelluvsu, clarisseswrld, lightning.mcqueen and others

soyn last few days in the studio have been soso hectic but im forever great full i get to spend them with some of the most beautiful amazing dancers in the whole wide worlddd ‹𝟹 ( dont forget to buy ur tickets for our upcoming recital !! )

annie.beth u guys literally look so good !! popped in the other day to help with lighting issues and oh em gee im so excited nd proud!!

⤷ soyn and u didnt say hello !! literally what !!

⤷ annie.beth my boss didnt let me ᴖ̈

⤷ soyn they hate to see us together fr

tallesttiptoes blood sweat nd tears going into this guys buy ur tickets ꃋᴖꃋ

⤷ soyn no literally like the amount of band-aids i have on rn ....

⤷ perseajackson can confirm shes gone through two boxes of hello kitty band-aids in the last month

lightning.mcqueen where can i buy tickets plsss (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

⤷ soyn TY JASON !! (balletwebsite.com) !!

♡ liked by soyn, letsbefrank, sillysallyjackson, underwoodz, annie.beth, fireboy, lightning.mcqueen and others

perseajackson day like forty seven of trying new recipes except when i tried making what i had originally planned i spilled like half of our salt ... we resorted to pasta but its a win cause my gf loves pasta

fireboy how the hell did u spill half of ur salt

⤷ perseajackson ive literally watched you intentionally put seven cups of salt into a cake before

⤷ fireboy ... and what im a salty man

⤷ prettygirlpipes we know

lightning.mcqueen waiting for the day u make me dinner ᴖ̈

⤷ perseajackson ill make u a full course meal bro dw

⤷ lightning.mcqueen bro ily

⤷ perseajackson omg no ily more

view more replies

soyn best chef in ny fr !! after ur mom ofc

⤷ perseajackson real i can never compete with her she'd eat me up

⤷ soyn its cause she's sally jackson babe dw

now playing ... birds of a feather by billie eilish

♡ liked by annie.beth, soyn, perseajackson, lightning.mcqueen, hazelluvsu, fireboy, letsbefrank and others

prettygirlpiper group met up at the fair this weekend nd omg ... i have not laughed n had so much fun since i cant even remember like core memory fr + everybody's fav couple making the whole fair feel single

annie.beth WE LITERALLY NEED TO DO THIS MORE IT WAS SM FUN

⤷ fireboy YALL DONT UNDERSTAND I HAVE NO LIFE IM FREE WHENEVERRR ( ˶•ᴖ•) !!

hazelluvsu i had so much fun except for when i almost died of laughter after watching jason lose at thirteen games in a row

⤷ lightning.mcqueen TRAITOR

⤷ perseajackson damnnnn u did my man dirty hazel

⤷ letsbefrank nah cause it was genuinely sad after a while

⤷ lightning.mcqueen percy ur the only one who understands me

soyn ily guys sm omgggg (pipes dont be shy send me that pic ˘ ³˘)

⤷ prettygirlpiper i gotchu pooks dw ♡

♡ liked by perseajackson, tallesttiptoes, letsbefrank, luvrgirlsteph, annie.beth, prettygirlpiper, fireboy and others

soyn im working late, cause im a singer dancer ( recital is in two days we r stressing but so ready !! )

tallesttiptoes OH YEAH im so ready (im not ready at all) literally so pumped (crying in my closet rn) i CANNOT wait (im going to kms)

⤷ luvrgirlsteph WE GOT THIS GIRL DONT KYS ‹𝟹

perseajackson ilysm babe u got this !!

⤷ soyn tysm percy ily (˃̣̣̥ᴖ˂̣̣̥)

⤷ prettygirlpiper omg i hate u guys #bringbacktoxiccouples

⤷ perseajackson stay jealous

hazelluvsu u got this yn !! ur an amazing leader i just know all the girls in ur studio r so lucky to be working with u !!

⤷ tallesttiptoes YESS WE AREEEE

⤷ luvrgirlsteph yn my fav dancer fr !!

⤷ soyn ilysm pretty girls ‹𝟹

now playing ... new years day by taylor swift

♡ liked by perseajackson, tallesttiptoes, annie.beth, prettygirlpiper, fireboy, clarisseswrld, lightning.mcqueen and others

soyn theres glitter on the floor after the party, girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby, and i am holding onto these memories as they hold onto me- we did it !!

perseajackson words cannot explain how proud i am of u babe, i literally started crying and the guy next to me hugged me and we cried TOGETHER

⤷ soyn NO WAY NO U DID NOT

⤷ lightning.mcqueen yes he did leo and i can confirm ill send u the pics rn

⤷ soyn THIS IS GOLDEN WHAT

fireboy THAT WAS SO COOL U LOOKED LIKE A PRINCESS I WANNA DO BALLET

⤷ soyn BETTTT LEO U GOT THAT

⤷ prettygirlpiper ohmygod i cannot wait to see how this ends

annie.beth U GUYS DID SO WELL IT WAS AMAZING !!

⤷ hazelluvsu my jaw was literally on the floor to whole time ꃋᴖꃋ

⤷ letsbefrank drop the leg day routine cause HOW

⤷ soyn STOPPP ILY GUYS SM (˃̣̣̥ᴖ˂̣̣̥)

© ssparksflyy ┊ ur user was inspired by so high school n so american - like if you put my name in it would be 'sobells' yk?? yk.

[sheluvv-gambino]

Hellooo!! I really love your fic "temporary perfection" it's so damn sad but I love it!! 😭😭😭

Can I request like a sequel to it?

Where he meets 1610 reader who is alive and healthy? If not that's ok too!! I still love your work and you!! 💖💖💖💖

Permanent Perfection.

A/N: I don't particularly like doing part 2's to my fics just because I'm not as consistent as other creators on here but this request was too cute to pass. I hope this was what you were invisioning anon!

pairings : e-42 miles morales x black fem!reader

summary : you came to him when he was at his lowest but now that you're here he's just as happy as he was before and he refuses to let you go this time.

warnings : death/funeral, unknown illness, implied suicide i guess?

Part 1

Miles thought he had nothing left in life.

No one could've prepared Miles for the complete emptiness he felt when you left.

He was just a shell of someone he used to be.

He lost his other half.

The only reason he was still breathing was so that his mother didn't have to go through another death.

It was hard walking through the hall's knowing that anytime someone would look in his direction they would instantly start to speak about her.

During his nightime activities he got more reckless, so reckless to the point Uncle Aaron had to take the suit away from him just so he could clean up his act.

--------------

You didn't know how you got to this new place.

It looked like your New York but it wasn't. It was littered with crime.

But one thing stood out the most. It had no Spiderman...

The New York that you came from had a Spiderman, in fact the Spiderman on you earth was your boyfriend. Miles...

He died trying to save his dad. Miguel had gottten to him to him first somehow and you were left to pick up the pieces.

You grieved but now you were just a shell of someone you used to be.

You lost your other half, you felt empty.

Everything became worse when you were sucked into a portal and was left in an unusual world.

It was like the universe was pulling you to someone else and they felt so familliar...

--------------

Miles stopped dead in his tracks when he saw...

her?

He dropped the bag of groceries that he was bringing back for his mother and swiftly walked over to girl and pulled her harshly into the dark alleyway.

"Who are you?" He exclaimed, frightening the girl even more.

"Miles? You're supposed to be dead! I am so confuesd right now." You breathed out.

"Y/N?!? How are you here, you're the one thats supposed to be dead." He lets go of you and starts to breathe heavy.

"You look like my Miles but your not. I don't think I'm in my own dimension."

"What are you talking about? Dimensions? My girlfriend died eight months ago."

"Yes, so did my Miles. Long story short there are different dimensions and I was obviously brought here for a reason that I dont know."

"Okay and how do I know that you're telling the truth, you dont even have the small mole above your nose that my Y/N had."

You take your thumb and rub away the makeup that you had to cover it up.

A few minutes had passed before Miles pulled you into a bone crushing hug.

"I missed you so much, It was like my other half was missing and now I'm whole again." He whispered whilst kissing your forehead and closing your eyes.

"I know Miles, I know."

--------------

Miles had snuck you in through his window after apologising to his mom for dropping the the groceries.

"You know the Miles on my earth never had his hair in braids, he was too tender headed for that." You laughed.

"Nah, it's probably because he couldn't pull it of like I can." He said whilst pulling you closer.

You both cuddled in comfortable silence before Miles spoke up.

"You know we getting you checked out at that the doctor's first thing." He murmured breathing into your neck.

"For what?"

"I just don't want to lose you again..."

In that moment Miles knew he had everything in life and so did you.

[footballfanficwriter]

Can you plz write a part 2 for the break up? 😭

The Break up pt2

Summary: oh man I've messed up big time

A/n: I've been getting a lot of requests for this part so finally here it is and it will be told from Jude's Pov also requests are open like always

What have I done, she's gone and I messed up, she had every right to leave in fact  I'm surprised she didn't attack or cry she didn't even look disappointed, she looked drained more than anything as if she was expecting me to say the words that would come out of my mouth

I call my mom to tell her the news about the  break up

"Hello?"

"Mum, she's gone and it's all my fault"

"What've you done now Jude"

"I cheated on Y/N and I guess she'd had enough of it and left"

"Jude, how many times have you done this and she's forgiven you, did I not tell you, did I not tell you that you'd lose her if you continued the way you did?"

"I know mum, but I need your help to get her back, I love her"

"Jude, there's not much I can do, I don't want to get involved in your issues, the only thing I can tell you to do is to go to therapy, because you obviously have a problem"

"Y/n had been suggesting that I do that for a long time now"

"Then I suggest you take the suggestion"

"I can't mom"

"Why not?"

"I'm scared"

"Oh, honey, I'll be there every step of the way ok, I'll organize the session in two days"

"Ok"

"Ok hon, get some rest and I'll see you later, I love you"

"I love you too"

I hang the phone up and walk to my bedroom that I shared with y/n, I stare at the empty wardrobe that was once filled with clothes that belonged to a girl that I love

I close it and just sit on the bed, trying to wrap my head around the events that took place

2 days later

I'm getting ready to go to training, then my first Therapy session, when I arrive at training I can't help but feel nervous about the therapy session

"Hey are you ok" Vini asks

"Yeah, I am"

Training goes on as usual and I get ready to leave for my therapy session when I arrive the therapist is very kind and welcoming

"Mr. Bellingham thank you for coming today"

"Thank you"

"Your Mother explained to me over the phone, that you are facing some personal problems, let's start with what those are shall we"

"My Girlfriend, well Ex girlfriend she broke up with me because I cheated on her on multiple occasions and she would forgive me each time and I guess she became fed up and left"

"Ok what else"

"I feel alone, lonely even like I'm just existing, Everytime I cheated on her, I always expected her to stay to be there with me even after all I've put her through"

"Well I'd be stating the obvious here but it sounds like you took her love and Kindness for granted"

"Yeah, can you fix me"

"I can't fix you Jude, that's up to you"

After a few more hours we end the session and I head home, to an empty house, I walk around the house remembering all the memories we shared, the laughs, the fights, that now seem so sweet in her absence

Fast Forward 12 months Later

Therapy has been going very well, my therapist says I've made a lot of progress and that If I continue this way then I won't be needing Therapy anymore

But we're back in England right now for a little Family get together and I'm glad we're doing this because it's been a long time since we've been out as a family

"Where is Y/n" dad asks

"Oh uh we broke up" I say

"Why?"

"I chea-

"She had to move away" mom says

I at her with a shocked look and she ignores it by continuing to eat her food

Jobe gives me a look and I give him a look telling him I'll explain later

"So Jobe hun, how's it been? Are you settling in well at the club?"

"Yeah mum, it's great, I mean I obviously miss Birmingham and stuff but Sunderland's fans are amazing they are great"

"When's your next match?"

"In two days"

"Great we'll be there to support you then"

"Great"

We finish having dinner and I go to the lounge just to scroll on Instagram

"Do you want to tell me what all that was about?" Jobe asks

"Not really "

He sits in the sofa next to me and looks me in the eyes

"C'mon, speak up"

"Fine, I cheated on her, not once or even twice more than five times actually"

"What?"

"Yeah, and she stayed all the times I did, until she got fed up with me and left "

"You're an idiot you know that"

"Oh thank you so much for the encouraging words Jobe"

"How can you cheat on a girl like Y/n, you've really messed up"

"Yeah, I know, but I'll get her back don't worry"

"You know what I think so too"

"Really?"

"No, I was just saying "

"Get out of here you Twat"

"Yeah yeah whatever I need to get some rest anyway, I'm tired of your shit"

"You're just jealous"

"Jealous of a person that cheated on his girlfriend more than twice now he thinks he can get her back?, I knew you were crazy but I didn't know you were delusional as well"

"Leave Jobe" I say throwing a pillow at him

2 Days later

It's Game day for Jobe and he's been nervous about it like he is before every game

"Mate calm down, you'll be fine"

"It's not like you're gonna die"

"Jude don't say that"

"But you're not, you'll live to see another day unfortunately"

"I'll also live to have a girlfriend that I won't cheat on"

"You know I'm going to let that slide because you're nervous, look at you you're sweating"

"It's because of how hot I am can't you see"

"I don't think the mirror would agree"

"You know who else wouldn't agree with certain actions that a certain person did"

"Who?"

"Dad"

"Boys c'mon we're gonna be late" we hear dad call out from downstairs

We walk down the stairs and drive to the stadium

Jobe goes to the dressing rooms and the three of us take our seats as we watch them warm up and watch people start to fill the Stadium up

Amongst those people I see a couple holding hands reminding me of how I use to do that with Y/N  in public

They sit right in front of us and start talking

"Yeah I spoke to mom she said it was ok" the guy says

The girl doesn't say anything she simply nods her head

I see the guy take the stadium in and looking around until he turns his head around and notices me

"Shit it's Jude Bellingham" he mutters

"Hi you alright" I ask

"Yeah I'm great mate, do you mind taking a picture"

"Sure"

"Babe can you take the picture for us"

We both stand up and he hands his girlfriend the phone

She takes the phone and the minute she turns around I freeze

It's her

"Shit" I hear mum mutter behind me

"Smile" she says

Her voice, i missed it

I smile and she takes a few pictures then hands the phone back to her boyfriend

"Thank you so much" the boyfriend says

"No problem mate" I say and bit back down

" you alright?" Mom asks

"Yeah great"

Y/n she looks tired, exhausted even like she hasn't slept in ages

"She looks sad" mom says

"I know, it's worrying honestly"

"What's worrying?" Dad asks coming back with food

"The probability of the game" I say

"What, you don't think Jobe can make it?"

"I do I'm just saying did you see how stressed out he looked earlier"

"That's Jobe before every game"

Kick off starts and Sunderland are already 3 points up by the 43rd minute

Jobe assisted in one and scored a brace hopefully he can turn it into a hatrick

By the end of the time the match ends scores are 5-0

And we watch the players wave to the fans and thank them

As Jobe is waving I wave at him and he notices me, I then indicate for him to look in the row before me

He looks and sees Y/n and her boyfriend leaving

He looks back at me and starts laughing from the pitch

I hate this idiot

We meet up with him outside the stadium and shower him with congratulations and tell him how well he played, dad then gives him a match debrief about the things he needs to improve on and what things he did great

In the car Jobe and I are texting about the whole Y/n situation because we can't verbal communicate in the presence of our parents

Jobe: so how did you see it was her?

Jude: The boyfriend recognized me and he asked for a picture

Jobe: and he asked Y/n to take it

Jude: oh wow look at that you're not as stupid as you look

Jobe: That's because I'm hot

Jude: in your dreams 💀

Jobe: stop changing the topic, did you talk to her

Jude: no I couldn't but she looked really tired and sad

Jobe: like how?

Jude: like she's been bothered about something

Jobe: did she at least look happy?

Jude: no, she didn't even acnowledge me, she just said smile, took some pictures gave the phone to her boyfriend and sat back down

Jobe: she's still mad at you

Jude: yeah that much is true

Jobe: I'm sure whatever it is it's not that big of a deal

Jude: whatever it is I need to know what is happening, I want to help her it's the least i can do after the damage I've caused

Jobe: and you've caused a lot of it, a lot is even an understatement

Jude: ok thank you very much🙄

Jobe: so what are you gonna do?

Jude: find out what's going on with her then help her

Jobe: and you're not doing all of this to get back together with her are you?🤨

Jude: no I'm not, seeing her today made me realize that her and I can never be a thing ever again, I've hurt her to much and I don't want to hurt her again

Jobe: ok, that's good, so where are you going to start Sherlock Holmes

🧐

Jude: social media, I'm going to look for her social media and start there

Jobe: it's giving stalker 🤭

Jude: I just want to help her

LJobe: ok Mr. Stalker

Jude: Jobe stop

Jobe: ok fine I'll help you since you asked so nicely

Jude: oh how sweet of you🙄

[bwabys-scenarios]

Fixer Upper

Part 11

Perv!Kurapika x Fem!Reader

part 10

part 12

warning: reader is kinda in a bad place 😭 so if that seems like it could be triggering for you, you may not want to stick around for future chapters. because there are some sad reveals later on :(

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BEFORE THE HUNTER EXAM

(Name) pulled her cover off and placed her sock covered feet on the cold floor. It was another sleepy Tuesday morning, the sun shining onto her messy bed.

Her legs were still tired from her long walk from her campus yesterday. She yawned into her hand as she poured her coffee into the cat paw patterned cup her little brothers gave her for her birthday.

(Name) sipped slowly. The cheap store brand coffee wasn’t amazing, but it was better than nothing. She glanced at her phone to see a missed call from her mother.

‘She never calls. Must of heard of the news from school…’

She pressed call, waiting a few seconds before her mother picked up.

“You idiot, I can’t believe you dropped out! After all the money your dad and I-“

“I’ve already sent a check reimbursing you for the classes you paid for.”

Her mother gasped. “You disrespectful little… I hope you know we’ll be cutting you off for this. We already had low expectations for you, and you couldn’t even meet those. What a useless girl you are.”

(Name) sighed. ‘Cut me off? Not like you were supporting me much anyways.’

She looked around her crappy apartment with a sigh.

“And you’re taking the Hunter Exam. Well good for you. You gave up being a nurse to take the most dangerous test in the world. How smart of you.”

Sarcasm and hate dripped off of her voice like venom. (Name) didn’t respond. She was used to this by now, only sighing.

“Is that all you wanted to say?”

Her mother was quiet for a moment.

“No. In fact, I wanted to let you know that any further contact from you will be considered harassment. You will not be contacting any members of our family after this call.”

(Name)’s eyes widened, her cup slipping to the floor. “Wait, you don’t mean-“

“Yes. You will not be able to see your brothers. Ever again.”

She hung up the phone. (Name) stared down at the shattered cup before quickly trying to call her mother back.

“Please, pick up mom… not my brothers. You can’t take them from me!!”

But she didn’t answer, and soon she wasn’t able to call her at all.

‘Must of blocked me…’

She sat down, not caring about the coffee that had splashed on her legs and began to burn her skin. (Name) could only stare down at the shards of the only gift she had from her brothers.

(Name) glanced at the Hunter Exam application, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.

‘Why not, not like I have anything to lose.’

The next few months (Name) went about life in a blur. She trained for the exam, slowly distancing herself from the small acquaintances she had from college, and breaking her lease.

She packed her backpack the night before the exam, placing several pairs of outfits, some canteens of water, food, other various items, and a dagger.

It was enough to be a good weight against her back, but not too heavy to make running or climbing difficult.

The last thing she packed into her bag was an envelope, carrying a letter.

“…”

She stared at the letter for a moment before stuffing it into the bottom of her bag, where it would be safe. It was the most important item in there, after all.

And she didn’t want anyone to read it until the time came.

———————

The first few trials of the exam had been hard, but she’d managed to scrape through and finally arrive where the First Phase would be held.

(Name) held onto one strap of her backpack quietly. Her navigator had been a bit worried for her, asking if she was okay.

“Yes, I’m alright. Just nervous I guess.”

The navigator nodded slowly. “I see. I think you’ll do well, dear, and if you don’t there’s always next year! I’ll see you then, yeah?”

(Name) looked down at her feet, not answering the woman. The navigator sighed before smiling.

“Good luck, I hope you pass!”

(Name) gave her a small smile back, waving as the doors closed and she began to descend. Her heart began to race. So far, she’d only met a few other Hunter applicants, all of them unkind. She was beginning to lose hope that she’d be able to make any type of alliances.

Not that she cared all that much. She didn’t think she’d be passing anyways.

Or surviving.

She looked down at the badge the navigator had given her.

‘#406. That must mean there are over 400 other applicants. Great.’

The doors opened up and (Name) walked out. Heads turned to stare at her, a few whistles and nods of approval could he heard and seen.

It wasn’t unexpected to (Name). After all, she was wearing a short white tennis skirt, and a pink cardigan over a white undershirt. Out of everyone else in sight, she seemed to be the only one dressed in such a way.

(Name) sighed as she joined the crowd. She looked around, her eyes glancing between each applicant before she spotted someone.

‘Oh thank god.’

She ran forward and grabbed onto a blonde woman’s sleeve, tugging it lightly.

“Hey there! I’m so glad I’m not the only woman here. Would you like to team up? Girls supporting girls and all?”

The blonde turned to her and blinked, tilting her head.

“Oh, um… you can join us, but…”

She blushed lightly, obviously embarrassed.

“I’m not a girl.”

(Name) tilted her head as the person next to the blonde bursted into laughter.

The blonde scowled and turned to the man. “And what is so funny, Leorio?”

The man, supposedly named Leorio, continued laughing. “Th-the first girl we meet and she thinks you’re a girl too! This is priceless!”

(Name) tightened her grip on the straps of her backpack. “I apologize. You’re just so pretty, I thought you were a girl.”

Yet again, the blonde blushed. “It’s alright, I promise. You said you were looking for someone to team up with, correct?”

She nodded as Leorio’s laughter died down. “Well you can stay with us. I’m not sure if we’ll be together the entire exam, but you’re welcome to tag along.”

“I sure wouldn’t mind a pretty little lady like you being on my t-“

The blonde hit him over the head with some sheathed weapon. “Ouch, Kurapika what was that for?”

The boy called Kurapika huffed. “I won’t have you being a creep to our new comrade. It’s disgraceful.”

“New comrade?”

A boy, who looked no older than twelve approached the group. “Oh, Gon! This girl asked to join up with us.”

(Name) waved at him. “Hello, I’m (Name).”

“That’s a beautiful name for a beautiful lady.”

Leorio grabbed her hand with both of his and shook it. “Welcome to the team!”

She shook hands with the others as well, looking away shyly when her hand touched Kurapika’s.

‘He really is pretty…’

Kurapika smiled. “I bet the exam has been full of trials, did you come here alone?”

“Yes, the only other applicants I’ve met have tried tricking or hurting me into failing. I’m glad I’ve finally met some nice people.”

Kurapika’s face shifted into a grimace. “That’s deplorable. But I guess it’s to be expected. The applicants could be anyone, meaning there’s bound to be bad people.”

(Name) sighed, pulling out a water canteen from her bag and sipping on it. “Any idea on what the first phase will be?”

When she caught Gon staring at the canteen, she offered it to him. He took it with a smile. Everyone took a sip before handing it back to (Name).

“I see you’ve come prepared. If you don’t mind me asking, what else do you have in your backpack?”

She frowned slightly but pulled it over her shoulder and into her hands. “Not a ton of things, but I have some snacks and water, along with a few different outfits.”

Kurapika blinked. ‘Oh, I guess different outfits would be important to a woman.’

She offered the three some hard candy, which Gon and Kurapika took. As they waited for the phase to begin, they chatted amongst themselves to get to know each other.

“You dropped out of medical school!?”

Leorio seemed almost angry, but was calmed down when he saw the sad look on her face.

“Yes, I did. It’s not that I don’t want to go, I just… I didn’t really have a choice in what I was studying. I decided to take the Hunter Exam on a whim, really. I…”

She didn’t finish her sentence, quickly smiling to hide that she almost let her secret spill.

“I’m excited to succeed!”

Leorio’s eyes softened. She was hiding something, but he could tell it wasn’t sinister. It was more for their sake then her’s.

“I hope you do.”

———————

A sharp ringing sounded throughout the large room. A man named Tonpa had walked over and talked to the group a bit, (Name) not paying him much attention. She was much too busy chatting with Kurapika, who seemed happy to share his experience with the exam with her.

The group looked up to see a man with short purple hair and a curly mustache standing before them, holding the ringing alarm. He stopped it before speaking.

“As of this moment the exam is closed to any further applicants. I would like to officially welcome everyone here to the Hunter Exam.”

Gon grinned. “Alright, finally, it’s gonna get started!”

“Aw man, I can’t believe I’m getting nervous.” Leorio said, loosening his tie.

“Come with me. Let me take a moment to remind you all that the Hunter Exam is extremely demanding. If you’re unprepared or unlucky, you may well be injured or killed. If you are alright with accepting those risks, then you may continue following me.”

The group followed after him, (Name) sticking by Kurapika. He may not be a girl, but out of all of them he seemed the most trustworthy and reliable.

“Very well then. The number of applicants is 405. At least for now.”

(Name) thought back to when Hisoka had taken one of the applicants out, holding the straps to her backpack a little tighter as she walked.

Leorio glanced around the crowd. “I guess I should have expected it, but no one’s backed out yet. I hoped there might be a few.”

(Name) hummed. “If they’ve made it this far, I doubt they’ll be backing out anytime soon.”

Kurapika nodded. “Yes, I agree. Just the path to the Hunter exam is full of trials and tribulations that would make ordinary men- oh and women, give up.”

(Name) suppressed a giggle. “Mhm.”

The people in the front began to speed up. “Hey, he’s picking up the pace!” Kurapika said with a frown.

“Sorry for the delay, but allow me to introduce myself. I’m Satotz, the examiner for the First Phase. I’m also the one that’s leading you to the sight for the Second Phase. Some of you may have already realized that keeping up with me until we reach the Second Phase is in fact, the First Phase.”

Their light jog turned into a run, and thirty minutes passed with no change in pace.

(Name) sighed lightly as she kept pace with the group, having to hold a hand over her chest to keep it from bouncing too much. ‘Went through the trouble of wearing two sports bras for no change in the outcome. Annoying.’

(Name) paid no attention to Tonpa explaining that this phase was not only a physical test, but a psychological one. She didn’t really care, (Name) was too busy focusing on her breathing and heavy backpack.

A boy came racing in between them riding a skateboard. (Name) glanced at him from the corner of her eye.

“Wow, that’s cool!” Gon called with a smile.

“Hey, kid on the skateboard, that’s not fair! You’re cheating!”

(Name) hummed and ran a bit ahead. She didn’t really feel like hearing Leorio harass a random kid. Kurapika watched her for a moment before following behind her.

“Sorry, he can be a bit annoying sometimes.”

Kurapika gave her a small smile, running beside her. (Name) shook her head. “No reason to be sorry. I’m just… not in the mood to hear someone yelling right now.”

“Hmm, that’s fair. Leorio can be pretty loud and obnoxious.”

(Name) hummed. “I happen to usually like loud and obnoxious people I’ll have you know. It’s just hard to to tolerate when I’m already tired from running.”

They both laughed. (Name) reached into her backpack and pulled out her canteen. “You thirsty? It’s been thirty minutes.”

He nodded. “Yes, thank you.”

Kurapika took a drink before he handed it back. The girl immediately shoved it back into her bag, Kurapika raising an eyebrow.

‘Why did she take it out if not to take a sip for herself?’

He didn’t voice this question, instead focusing on his legs, willing them forward.

“So, Kurapika, how old are you?”

The blonde tilted his head. “Why do you ask?”

She shrugged, shouldering her backpack again. “Just curious. If you want to know, I’m 18 myself.”

“17, 18 in April.”

(Name) nodded. ‘So we’re about the same age. Interesting…’

“And apparently Leorio is 19.”

“19!? He certainly doesn’t look the part.”

The two laughed again, (Name) nearly tripping, but quickly being steadied by Kurapika.

“Woah there, watch where you step. It is dark in here.”

(Name) nodded, lightly flustered from his grasp on her wrist. He let go quickly, seemingly unfazed by the physical contact.

3 hours pass by, and (Name) was beginning to get tired. The group stopped when Leorio collapsed, (Name) immediately rushing to his side. She dropped next to him, patting his back and offering him some water.

“Leorio!” Gon began running to join Leorio when the white haired boy, Killua called out to him.

“Hey, what do you think you’re doing? He’s finished, so just leave him behind.”

Gon frowned. “Come on, you don’t know that! Besides I can’t just leave him here, he’s my friend!”

“Friend?”

“Uh huh. That’s what I said.”

After chugging the rest of the water from one of her canteens, Leorio began to stand. “I’m not giving up… I came here to become a Hunter and that’s what I’m gonna do!”

(Name) watched as he rushed forward, Tonpa sighing.

“Hey take it easy, you need a break.”

“Shut up! If you’re just gonna stand around here, I’ll leave you… in my dust… hah hah… aww great, my legs won’t move.”

(Name) walked forward and handed him a handkerchief to wipe his sweat away with. Kurapika watched this interaction, his eyes watching her face twist into concern for a man she’d just met.

“So you’re not just in it for the money.”

Leorio huffed. “No, it’s all about money. There’s no other reason…”

“We don’t have time to argue about this. What do you think we should do now, Tonpa?”

(Name) stood up straight again, stretching lightly.

“Hmmm, wait a sec, that smell! Do ya remember? There was a sweet smell from that tunnel. Hey, I think it might help you recuperate!”

“What?”

“I thought I recognize that smell, I think it’s the sap of the healing cedar tree!” Tonpa exclaimed.

“Healing cedar?”

“Yeah! The sap is used by Hunters who often become exhausted in the forest. All you have to do is smell the aroma for a while and you can recover and keep on going.”

Kurapika stopped Tonpa from carrying Leorio away. “Wait a minute, it could be a trap.”

“Maybe, but we can’t just leave him behind now, can we? It’s a chance we’re gonna have to take.”

The blonde frowned. “Yes, but…”

“I’m king of the flunkies. You wanna know why I failed the exam 34 times? I’m a sucker for anyone that needs my help.”

(Name) raised an eyebrow at this. She glanced between Leorio and Tonpa.

“It’s okay. As soon as Leorio recovers, we’ll catch up to you, I promise.”

“I’m sorry, Tonpa… Gon, Kurapika, (Name), don’t worry about me. Go for it!”

(Name) crouched down and rearranged her backpack as the others spoke, then stood as they began to leave, watching Leorio carry him away with a suspicious look.

‘Don’t trust him one bit.’ She thought.

“What are you doing, are you coming or not?”

“Oh yeah, sorry to keep you waiting. You can go on ahead.”

Killua tilted his head. “You mean you’re not going to keep going?”

“Yeah, not unless it’s with Leorio.”

(Name) nodded. “Me either. I’m still worried for him, he wasn’t doing too hot…”

Both Gon and Kurapika noticed her staring into the distance, clutching her cardigan tightly.

“Kurapika, I’m going to see how they’re doing. Tonpa said they’d be okay, but I’m still worried.”

“I’ll come with you. We can always catch up to the group later on.”

Gon nodded towards Killua. “Alright, we’ll be back. Then, if you want, you can tell me your name. Because I still don’t know what it is.”

Kurapika glanced at (Name). “Will you be coming as well?”

She gave him a quick nod. “Of course. I can’t just abandon someone in need.”

He didn’t respond, racing after Gon towards where they had last seen Leorio and Tonpa heading.

But he did feel something stir in his chest when his eyes met hers.

‘She’s kind. It’s… nice to see that in such a place.’

The three stopped when they spotted Tonpa lying on the ground.

“Tonpa! What’s wrong?”

He groaned and lifted himself up slowly. “Oh, it’s you. Hurry, they need your help!”

“What happened back there?” Kurapika asked, glancing between Tonpa and the hallway he pointed to.

“It was a trap. Worst I’ve seen. Hurry!”

(Name) turned and ran towards where Tonpa had been pointing, the two following behind her.

The three continued to run until they came across Nicholas, one of the applicants.

“Nicholas! What’s wrong?”

The boy slowly moved so he was on his hands and knees, looking back at them with a delirious expression. Kurapika subconsciously pushed (Name) behind him.

The man began to walk away while laughing to himself. Kurapika watched him for a minute before speaking.

“Let’s go, we have to find Leorio.”

Gon and (Name) nodded. “Yeah.”

——————

“Leorio, can you hear me? Leorio!!!”

Gon continued to call out Leorio’s name as they ran, (Name) noticing Kurapika beginning to slow down.

“Kurapika?”

She stopped next to him, Gon circling back when he noticed they were no longer running. “What’s wrong?”

Kurapika eyes became hazy, the blonde holding up his weapons to defend himself. “The Phantom Troupe…”

His breath came out in short pants as his eyes began to turn a deep shade of scarlet.

“Oh no…please, don’t do it…”

He collapsed onto the ground, (Name) quick to kneel by his side. “Kurapika, what’s going on? Are you alright?”

“Can you hear me?” Gon asked, concern lacing his voice.

Kurapika stared at the ground as sweat beaded down his forehead.

He fell, lying against the ground. “Make… them stop… please…”

He stared off into the distance, unable to move. (Name) wasn’t sure what to do, so she rubbed soothing circles into his back. “Kurapika, no one’s here. It’s just us.”

He didn’t relax though. His eyes remained that same scarlet color. “We have to get going. I’ll carry him.”

(Name) hoisted Kurapika up and over her shoulder. Gon blinked. “Wow, you’re strong.”

She nodded, a small smile on her lips. “I grew up with two younger brothers who looooved piggy back rides.”

“Can I get one too? Later, I mean.”

(Name) laughed. “Sure, after we find Leorio.”

They continued, now slowed down because of Kurapika’s weight. She didn’t seem to have much trouble carrying him, only occasionally grunting and rearranging him on her shoulder.

“So, Gon, why do you want to be a Hunter?”

The young boy hummed, adjusting the line on his fishing pole. “Mmm, I’m not sure yet, but I want to find my dad. He’s a Hunter too.”

‘Find? Did his dad abandon him?’

(Name) nodded slowly. “I see.”

“What about you?”

The girl paused, her grip on Kurapika’s thigh tightening ever so slightly. “Well… I didn’t have many options.”

Gon tilted his head. “Really?”

“Yeah. I… just thought it would be fun to try out.”

She sighed. (Name) didn’t enjoy lying, especially to an honest boy like him, but the truth about the situation wasn’t something a child should know. Gon didn’t respond.

The hallway was quiet for a bit, until Kurapika grunted loudly. (Name) turned her head a bit to see if he’d woken up, only for him to begin struggling against her and cry out.

“Kurapika! Are you alright?”

He wiggled out of her grasp, and just as she was about to lean over and help him back up, the white haired boy from before appeared, kicking the blonde in the face.

“Kurapika!”

She rushed over to his side, crouching down as he lifted his upper half onto his forearms to look up.

She helped him into a sitting position, the blonde leaning against her for support.

“Kurapika?”

Gon ran over, Killua standing in front of (Name) and Kurapika. The red had left his eyes, leaving them the pretty brown color she had noticed when she first met him.

“Oh good, you’re finally back to normal!” Gon said, smiling.

“But, uh…”

Killua watched Kurapika and (Name) with his blue eyes. “There is no healing cedar tree.”

“Huh!?”

“The sap comes from the tree of hallucination, it’s been used by assassins for a long time. It’s victims re-experience the worst events of their lives, and it eventually drives them insane.”

Kurapika blinked slowly, realizing he’d been leaning against (Name). He pulled back, the girl reaching out to make sure he didn’t fall.

“How do you know that?” Gon asked.

“So that means Tonpa must of…”

Killua nodded at the blonde. “Yeah, that’s right, he set you guys up.”

Kurapika growled in anger, gripping onto (Name)’s sleeve.

“We should go.”

“Sure, I think I know a way we can save the old guy you were with, and catch up with the group again with a single move.”

(Name) helped Kurapika stand, the blonde grateful for her help. She’d only known him for an hour but was risking failing the exam to make sure him and Leorio were okay.

“A games no fun unless there’s some risks.”

“I’m glad we met up again! Are you going to tell me your name?”

The boy smiled at Gon. “It’s Killua.”

———————

“Okay Killua, tell us your idea.”

He pulled out a small object from his pocket. “It’s a bomb, small but effective.”

(Name) pulled Gon back by his shoulders a bit by instinct. He didn’t react, only glancing at her hands before responding.

“That’s a bomb?”

“Let’s blow up this wall and all the disgusting sap covering it.”

He placed the bombs all over the wall, (Name) stepping a few feet back. Kurapika watched as she carefully maneuvered Gon to a safe distance, the dark haired boy not seeming to mind at all.

The explosion began, the four leaping through the opening created by the bomb to grab Leorio.

They all fell onto the ground, (Name) being caught before she face planted by Kurapika. He pulled her up slightly before letting go.

“It worked! Not the easiest way to travel but it is fast! I guess there’s no turning back now.”

Kurapika blinked as (Name) knelt next to Leorio. “You alright?”

“Gon? (Name)? Kurapika? … Pietro?”

She patted his back gently. “It’s just us, Leorio.”

“You were hallucinating as a result of inhaling the sap. Tonpa fooled us all.”

Leorio gave (Name) a smile, accepting her hand when she offered to pull him to her feet.

“So that’s what that was. Guess I owe you guys one for saving my butt. But how did you manage to avoid it?”

Kurapika shook his head. “It was a close call for me.”

“(Name) and I were fine!”

“I guess it wouldn’t work on Gon cuz he’s still a kid, so he doesn’t have any problems yet.”

‘But why wouldn’t it work for (Name)?’

Leorio and Kurapika glanced at the girl, who was pulling out a bandaid to place on Gon’s knee. The two seemed to already be friendly with each other, laughing when Gon nearly tripped again.

“Hey old man, we don’t have time to sit around chatting.”

“OLD MAN!? What are you-“

“His names Killua!”

“Ready for the next round?”

Killua threw more bombs past Leorio’s head. “What was that, I heard a click.”

(Name) covered Gon and Killua with her cardigan, then shielded her ears.

“THEY’RE BOMBS!?”

The group of five jumped through the hole the bombs left, Gon handing (Name) her cardigan after they landed. “Thanks (Name)!”

Killua watched her with narrow eyes. ‘What does she get out of protecting us with that flimsy cardigan? What is she after..?’

A plume of smoke dispersed through the hallway, the sound of the other applicants coughing echoing on the walls.

“What exactly is going on here?” Satotz asked.

“Oh, uh, I’m sorry, but we had to break through the walls.” Gon said apologetically.

“I never said you couldn’t destroy the walls, but tell me, how is it that you survived after wondering through the tunnels of hallucinations? I’m quite impressed.”

(Name) pulled some debris from her hair, sighing. Leorio spotted Tonpa and rushed forward, grabbing him by the collar. “How dare you! I have a score to settle with you!”

“Stop, Leorio!”

(Name) pulled out a piece of hard candy and began to suck on it as her new comrades argued. Killua watched her do this and crouched down next to her.

“You got candy?”

She tilted her head then smiled. “Yes, would you like a piece?”

She offered him a piece of butterscotch candy, which he took. ‘… maybe she’s not so bad after all. I’ll still keep my distance but…’

He didn’t sense any malicious intent from her, just… something. Something that honestly unnerved him a little.

——————

(Name) and Kurapika kept pace with each other, eventually reaching Leorio who had taken off his shirt.

“I see, so you were lying to us before.”

“Didn’t lie! My objective has always been to make a lot of money! And whatever happened in the past, happened in the past! I have no interest in doing anything that won’t make me any money!”

Kurapika sighed. “I wish you luck.”

“I don’t need luck, I’m going to become a hunter or die trying!”

“No, a doctor.”

(Name) giggled next to them.

“Could you please not look at me like that, Kurapika? It makes me a little nervous. Now come on, let’s go!”

The blonde smiled. “You alright now, Leorio?”

“Yeah I’m fine, check it out! I don’t care how stupid I look! I’d keep running even if I was naked! Pretend you don’t know me if you want!”

(Name) gasped when Kurapika threw off his tabard and stuffed it into his bag. Kurapika glanced at her. “Maybe we should follow his example.”

She pulled off her cardigan and stuffed it into her backpack.

It didn’t take long for her to catch up to Leorio, who instantly noticed she was no longer covered by her thick cardigan.

“WOAH! You’ve got a nice figure. Plump and soft, just how I like th-“

Kurapika kicked the back of his legs, causing him to crumple before getting back up and running behind them.

“WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?”

The blonde shrugged. “Sorry, pervert senses were tingling.”

———————

They reached the outside, (Name) instantly unbuttoning her undershirt so she could fan herself. It was hot, and even with just her skirt and top she was sweating. “Yeesh, I’m burning up.”

She crouched down and fanned herself with her hand, ignoring what was going on. They seemed to be distracted by some kind of “impersonator”, but she didn’t care all that much.

The magician disposed of the impersonator and they began to run again.

‘Ah, maybe I should have listened a little…’ she thought, watching as the people around her began to be attacked by mysterious beasts.

She glanced around to see she’d already lost her group, sighing to herself.

“You lost, little girl?”

(Name) blinked before turning her head to the left to see Hisoka leaning against a tree. He smiled at her, holding a card in his hand.

“Dunno, maybe.”

She shrugged nonchalantly, giving Hisoka a bored look. “Hmm…”

Hisoka stepped forward, looking her over. “Not bad… you certainly have some potential.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Potential? What do you mean by that?”

The magician tossed a card in her direction, the girl not even flinching when it sliced her cheek. She continued to stare at him, the look in her eyes making him shiver.

It was the look of someone prepared to die.

“I see… so that’s why you’ve peaked my interest…”

He pointed behind him. “You pass. If you continue that way, you’ll catch up to the group in no time.”

He began to walk in the opposite direction, quickly passing her by.

“Wait, if that way is the right direction, then why are you going that way?”

He only chuckled. “I have some… business to take care of.”

She sighed and took out her dagger. “Whatever.”

She continued running in the direction he pointed to, the man barely restraining himself from letting out a moan.

“God, I can’t wait until she’s ready to fight.”

He chuckled to himself before continuing on his run.

“(Name)!”

Gon yelled out, nearly crashing into the girl. She paused, catching him in her arms. “Gon, you’re okay!”

She squeezed him lightly before noticing Kurapika as well. “(Name)…”

He stopped for a moment to catch his breath. “Your cheek…”

She blinked before swiping at her cheek with her sleeve. “Oh, this? You can thank Hisoka for it. He attacked me, then said I passed and pointed to where I could find the group. Still haven’t found them, though.”

Kurapika gripped his weapons tightly. “He’d even hurt a woman? That sick bastard…”

(Name) sighed. “It doesn’t hurt that much, and once we get to the sight of the second phase I’ll put a bandaid on it. I guess I’m just lucky to have survived this long, considering I’ve been alone these past thirty minutes.”

She offered the two a drink from her canteen, which they took. After that they continued, Kurapika keeping a close eye on the girl.

Killua was waiting near the edge of the crowd, and was the first one to see the three arrive.

“Gon, (Name)!”

He smiled, putting his hands in his pockets.

(Name) bent over to catch her breath before rushing over to the still unconscious Leorio.

Hisoka had pointed him out seconds before, winking at the girl. Kurapika scowled when he noticed Hisoka watching her every movement.

‘That creep. I’ll need to stick by her so he doesn’t get any weird ideas.’

Leorio didn’t remember anything, but seemed happy to have (Name) taking care of his injuries. Kurapika pulled her back to gently wipe her cheek.

“Leorio can wait a second, you need to tend to yourself first.”

She looked to the ground, nodding. ‘But I don’t really care about my own injuries…’

Nonetheless, she cleaned the cut and applied a hello kitty bandaid before going back to Leorio.

Satotz left shortly after wishing them all luck. Killua watched her tend to Leorio before walking off and chatting with Gon.

“Alright, you should be okay. It’s going to take a while for the swelling in your cheek to go down, though.”

She helped pull him to his feet before pulling her backpack over her shoulders. “Thank you, beautiful. If I had you to tend to me, I’d get hurt all the time.”

Kurapika narrowed his eyes. “I think I’ll be taking care of your injuries after this.”

(Name) chuckled, poking Leorio’s good cheek. “Don’t get hurt on purpose, big guy.”

———————

“It’s almost time!” Gon said.

“I’m getting a little nervous.” Kurapika replied, holding onto his satchel tightly.

“I think you’ll do fine.” she patted his shoulder gently, a smile on her lips.

“Just about anything could be waiting for us behind those doors…”

The clock rang soon after Leorio finished his sentence. The doors to the building opened, a loud growling sound making (Name) jump and hide behind Kurapika and Leorio.

“Thanks for waiting. Buhara, how are you feeling now, hungry?”

A woman with greenish blue hair sat in front of a giant of a man, who’s stomach had been causing the loud noise.

“Yeah Menchi, I think anyone who has ears can hear that I’m starving!”

She smiled shyly at the group in front of her. “As you might have guessed, us two Gourmet Hunters are in charge of judging the Second Phase.”

“Gourmet Hunters?”

“What’s that?”

“Gourmet Hunters travel around the world collecting all sorts of exotic ingredients. They then use them to create new innovative dishes that have never been tasted. Before becoming Hunters, most of them were gourmet chefs.” Kurapika answered

‘Hmm, he’s smart.’ (Name) thought, watching the blonde.

“Hmm, so then this phase…”

“Right! So the subject for this phase, is cooking!”

“COOKING!?”

(Name) smiled. ‘This is actually something I can do!’

She listened to the two examiners, nodding along.

“Man, I’ve never cooked anything before in my life!” Leorio said with a sigh. (Name) was taken aback by this.

“Never? How are you still alive?”

Kurapika looked away from the girl. ‘I’ve never cooked either, but I’ll keep that to myself,’ he thought, not wanting to embarrass himself.

Gon smiled. “I know how to cook!”

The three turned towards the boy. “You serious? What can you make?” Leorio asked.

“I can make a lot of different stuff, but my specialty is macaroni and cheese!”

“Macaroni… and cheese?”

(Name) giggled. “Oh, Gon, that’s great for your age.”

“Well, I guess you could call that cooking.”

Kurapika gave the boy a smile as Leorio laughed. “Come on, it doesn’t take much of a chef to make a simple dish like macaroni and cheese.”

“Hey, that’s not true! Aunt Mito always said no one makes it like me!”

(Name) nodded along, patting his head.

“I’m sure she’s right. Maybe you can make it for me sometime.” Leorio said, snickering.

“Met too.” Kurapika agreed, seemingly amused by the innocent boy.

(Name) gave him a piece of candy, quickly grabbing a piece for Killua as well. “Here, I’ll want some of that macaroni and cheese as well. Is this payment good enough?”

She winked, the boy laughing. “Yes, this will do!”

“Listen up! My order is…”

(Name) quieted down, glancing back to the large man known as Buhara.

“A whole roasted pig! It’s my absolute favorite, and living in the forest is the great stamp! The most ferocious and delicious pig of them all!”

“The great stamp?” The entire group asked in unison.

The ground began to shake underneath them, a herd of pigs barreling towards them. Kurapika pulled (Name) out of the way just in time, the girl letting out a gasp as her skirt flew up from the gust of wind accompanying the stampede.

She was thankful she had worn a pair of shorts underneath, but other people weren’t.

“Aww, there’s shorts.”

(Name) and Kurapika turned to look at Leorio at the same time.

“Why do you sound so disappointed?”

Kurapika shook his head at (Name). “You don’t want to know what goes through that pervert’s mind.”

He ushered her away, glaring back at Leorio as he did.

They continued running away from the giant pigs, (Name) and Kurapika teaming up.

“It’s snout is tough, did you see how it launched all those grown men?”

Kurapika nodded. “Yes, but it should have some sort of weakness. Perhaps…”

From the corner of his eye, Kurapika watched Gon hit the stamp over the head, causing it to fall over dead.

“(Name), I have a plan, but you’re going to have to trust me.”

They hid behind a tree so he could explain. “You’re going to grab a thick tree branch, and I’m going to throw you onto the pigs back. Then, you’ll hit it over the head. We’ll repeat this twice.”

She seemed a bit uncomfortable with this plan, glancing to the pig sniffing around for them. “Oh um… are you sure you can pick me up?”

He tilted his head, looking her up and down. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be able to?”

Too embarrassed to answer that, she agreed to the plan.

“Okay, on the count of three, we’ll rush out to attack.” Kurapika said, grabbing her hand. (Name) looked down, her face heating up ever so slightly.

“One!”

“Two!”

“THREE!”

They rushed out, causing the pig to run towards them. Kurapika grabbed (Name) by the waist and threw her into the air. “AHHH!”

She landed with a huff onto the pig’s back, groaning.

“You’ve got it, (Name)! Hit it now!”

She recovered quickly, bringing the stick down with as much force as she could manage. The pig collapsed, (Name) barely moving out of the way before she was crushed.

“You did it!”

Kurapika rushed over to help her up, smiling. The girl rubbed her bottom. “That landing hurt, I’m not excited to do that again.”

He gave her a sympathetic smile. “Sorry, it’s just the safest way to do it.”

The two repeated the action, Kurapika helping her off the second time.

“Owie…”

Kurapika could only gently pat her shoulder. “You alright?”

She nodded slowly. “As alright as I can be, after being thrown in the air and landing on a pig.”

Kurapika laughed at this, the girl joining him.

————————

Buhara ended up passing everyone that entered a roasted pig.

Menchi scolded him for passing everyone, but (Name) wasn’t listening. She was busy staring at Kurapika’s hand, that was placed on her shoulder.

“I’m not an armrest, ya know.”

Kurapika pulled his hand back, cheeks going pink. “Oh, sorry! I meant to say thank you for your help, but I got distracted by Buhara and Menchi.”

She giggled. “Well thank you for coming up with the plan. Now we’ve both passed half of the second phase!”

He relaxed, returning her smile.

“For the next part of this phase you’ll be filling my order, which is… sushi.”

Leorio tilted his head. “Sushi?”

“Sushi? Wonder what that is…” killua thought aloud.

“Any ideas?” Kurapika asked (Name), turning to her. She shook her head.

“No, unfortunately I’ve never heard of that dish before.” The two sighed.

“You guys look pretty stressed out! But I don’t blame you for not knowing what it is. Sushi is an ethnic dish from a small island country. I’ll give you a little hint. Inside you’ll find your work stations!”

(Name) tilted her head. “Work station?”

The applicants walked inside, seeing various kitchen work stations.

“Here’s where you’ll prepare the dish. Each station has all the essential tools and ingredients. I’ve even prepared the rice for you, which is necessary to make sushi. And now for one final hint! I’m particularly fond of hand molded nigiri sushi!”

(Name) stood at her station, between Kurapika and Leorio.

“Alright then, you guys can get started! This test will conclude as soon as I’m full. Until then you can serve me as many pieces as you want.”

(Name) watched Leorio stare at the barrel of rice. “Hmm… hand molded? That should give me some sort of indication of what it’s supposed to look like. But that still doesn’t tell me what other things I need to use.”

Kurapika hummed. “Nigiri sushi… I’m not sure exactly how this food is supposed to be made, but I think I’ve read about it somewhere.”

“Really?”

“Let’s see, if I recall, it’s made mostly of rice, mixed with vinegar and some type of raw fish.”

“RAW FISH!?”

(Name) jumped at the sound of his voice, Kurapika’s eyebrow twitching in annoyance.

“We’re stuck out here in the middle of a forest!”

Kurapika threw his spoon at Leorio, hitting his forehead.

“Would you be quiet? There are rivers in forests you know and we could fish in them!”

“Hmph.”

The two looked around, seeing all the other applicants staring at them. Menacingly.

They raced out of the building, leaving the three alone. (Name) set her bag down and began running after them, Kurapika and Leorio following her lead.

“It’s no fair! They were eavesdropping!”

Kurapika sighed. “It’s not their fault, I was the one who shot my mouth off.”

“This sucks! Now everyone knows what’s in it!”

(Name) patted Kurapika on the shoulder. “I’m sure they would have figured it out anyways. Considering we were about to leave and return with fish.”

He gave her a small smile. “Thanks.”

———————

The three returned with fish of varying types. (Name) traded Gon a few pieces of candy in exchange for a few fish.

“Well, all that’s left is to cook. Good luck boys!”

She gave them both a reassuring pat on the back before beginning her cooking process.

(Name) thought back to what Menchi had said, along with Kurapika’s limited information.

‘Does that mean the fish is supposed to be molded into the rice? Or the rice covers it?’

She tilted her head as she began to clean the fish. ‘Well, I assume I’ll at least need to cut it into fillets. After all, no one is dumb enough to serve her a whole, raw fish, right?”

Wrong.

(Name) watched with an incredulous expression as Leorio served Menchi an entire fish, still flipping around, halfway covered in rice.

Of course, Menchi rightly knocked the plate away. Leorio sulked back to his station.

“She didn’t like it…”

(Name) raised an eyebrow, but stayed quiet. ‘So he wasn’t kidding when he said he’s never cooked before…’

“What are you making?”

(Name) looked up to see Kurapika peeking over her shoulder. “Hey, no peeking!”

She bumped him with her hip, scolding him. “No cheating off of me!”

He pouted. “I wasn’t trying to… I was just curious.”

“Well be curious in that direction.”

“No, because you’re pointing at Leorio.”

“HEY!”

(Name) giggled to herself as she finished her dish, beaming. “I’m done!”

She carried her plate to Menchi, setting it down in front of her. “Here’s my entry!”

Menchi hummed, seemingly interested from the smell alone.

“It’s sushi! I um… think!”

Menchi looked down at the dish. It definitely wasn’t sushi, but the girl had obviously tried, and if Menchi appreciated anything, it was effort.

The blue haired woman took a bite. “Hmm… too salty, but good try. It’s not quite sushi, but it tastes good. Go back and try again.”

(Name) blinked, then nodded. She felt dejected, she’d tried her hardest!

She walked back to her station, grabbing her bag. “(Name), what are you doing?”

“I give up.”

The two stared at her. “You give up? Why??”

“I’m a failure, I couldn’t make sushi.”

“(Name).”

Kurapika patted her head. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. Your dish is the only one Menchi has even taken a bite of so far. Why don’t you try again?”

(Name) pouted. “… I’m going to go sit by the river.”

The two watched her walk away, her head hung low.

“Drama queen.” Leorio said, before getting back to his work.

“Well…” Kurapika stared in her direction for a moment. “She’s certainly… dramatic.”

But the blonde couldn’t help following her with his eyes, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Hey Kurapika, come try this! (Name) had some leftovers!”

Kurapika sighed. “You shouldn’t just eat the food she prepared…”

But he did join Leorio, taking a bite. “Oh wow, it is really good.”

The two snacked on her leftover food before getting back to work.

(Name)’s eyebrow twitched when she noticed Hisoka already sitting by the river. ‘Fuck it. Yolo.’

(Name) sat down a few feet away from him, tossing rocks into the water. She wasn’t even attempting to skip them, just throwing them into the river.

“… (Name).”

She hesitantly looked at him, raising an eyebrow. “What?”

“What are you doing here?”

She huffed. “Sulking.”

“Hmm.”

(Name) went back to her rock throwing, Hisoka now watching her. “Gave up that easily, huh?”

She paused. “As if you didn’t as well?”

He smirked. “Touché.”

The two sat in silence for a bit, before (Name) heard someone running up behind her. “(Name)- oh.”

The person paused a good distance away from her. “Can you come here? Away from…”

Hisoka raised his hand. “I’m not going to hurt her. We were just… talking.”

‘Oh now people are going to think I’m friendly with the murder clown.’

(Name) stood up, and stuck out her tongue at Hisoka for good measure. ‘There, now people will think I hate him! Orrr that I have a death wish. Which isn’t exactly wrong but-‘

“(Name), we know what sushi is now!”

It was Kurapika, and he was smiling at her. “Come on, now we’ve got a real chance to pass!”

Her pulled her back to the building by her hand, smiling widely. She couldn’t help but smile too.

‘He thought of me.’

———————

Though they all tried their hardest, even after figuring out how to make sushi, none of them could satisfy Menchi.

She poured herself a cup of green tea, sipping slowly. “Ah..”

(Name) had just given her the last piece of sushi, and had been rejected yet again.

“Sorry, but I’m completely stuffed!”

Hanzo blinked. “So then, what happens now?”

“Like I said, the test is over and this time no one passed. Thank you, come again.”

The air grew tense, (Name) too busy pouting to really care. ‘But I tried so hard…’

She only looked up when Gon stole Menchi’s phone.

“Oh dear.”

She turned her head when she heard someone destroy one of the cooking stations. ‘Sore loser.’ (Name) thought, munching on piece of candy.

“Alright, I’ll show you what it means to be a Gourmet Hunter.”

Menchi left, saying she’d be back in about an hour. (Name) took this as an opportunity to chat with Buhara.

“Sorry that people are being disrespectful. I’m actually a chef myself, but not on any level close to you two.”

Buhara seemed a bit surprised by her comment. “Ah, that makes sense. Menchi seemed to enjoy your dishes the best. If she hadn’t been so picky today, I’m sure she would have passed you.”

(Name) nodded. “Yeah, but that’s not how things went.”

She sat down next to him, taking out a piece of candy and handing it to the man. “Here, I know after I’ve eaten a savory meal I like to have something a little sweet to balance it out.”

‘This girl…’

He took the candy. ‘I’m starting to understand Menchi’s interest in her.’

(Name) and Buhara chatted, exchanging recipes and laughing over stories about cooking gone wrong.

“Is she becoming friends with the examiner?”

Kurapika watched her, eyes wide. Leorio cheered. “Yeah, butter him up (Name)! Use your womanly charm and get us a passing grade!”

Kurapika smacked him over the head. “First of all, she’s not doing that. Secondly, if she was, you screaming out her plans would foil them.”

“Oh.”

Menchi returned, momentarily glancing at (Name) and Buhara with a raised eyebrow before showing off her finds.

(Name) watched as the brute from before kicked the table Menchi had served the plate on over, nearly hitting (Name) in the face.

To her surprise, Buhara extended a hand to shield her. “Oh, thank you!”

He gave her a nod. “No problem.”

A few applicants attempted to get near Machi, but Buhara hit them with surprising strength. “Ooo get ‘em!!” (Name) called, cheering him on.

The wrestler Todo ended up pushing Buhara over, but the man seemed unfazed. “Ooo, you’re pretty strong. Guess it’s time to get serious. Think you can handle it?”

Menchi stepped in. “I can take care of him by myself.”

(Name) stared wide eyed as Menchi beat the absolute SHIT out of Todo, only using her legs.

‘That’s kind of hot.’ (Name) thought.

Kurapika pulled (Name) to safety. “Come here, it’s not safe over there.”

“Oh.”

She hadn’t realized, but it had become kind of a fighting zone. Kurapika noticed she kept staring at Menchi, but didn’t think much. Her and Satotz were arguing, (Name) only catching the end of it.

“I was trying to see how resourceful these guys were. Could they face a challenge for which they had little or no experience?”

“That may be true, Menchi, but since no one passed that test, don’t you think it may have been a bit too difficult?”

‘Oh god the sky is talking.’

“It’s an airship with the Hunter Association’s logo!”

‘Oh. That makes more sense.’ (Name) thought, being pulled outside by Kurapika.

“Oh shit an old guy!” (Name) gasped, pointing at an old man falling from the sky. “I was not expecting to see an old man die today.”

The man landed, seemingly unfazed. ‘Oh so he’s some sort of wizard. Wait did she say chairman?’

Killua and Gon seemed surprised he hadn’t broken his legs. “I’m surprised he isn’t a chairman pancake.” (Name) said, patting Gon on the head.

Apparently, he was the highest authority in the Hunter Association.

(Name) stood near Menchi, glancing at her at her as Netero talked. ‘She’s cute.’

“I have an idea. We’re going to give them all a second chance at the test, and I would like for you to continue being the examiner for this. But this time around I want you to demonstrate how it’s done before the applicants make an attempt. Does that sound reasonable? I think this will go a long way for everyone to accept your ruling.”

The group of five were relieved that they would be getting a second chance.

“The test is, a boiled egg.”

———————

The group rode on the airship to a large mountain.

“So, this is the spot.” Menchi said, standing before a cliff.

“What is this place?”

“How deep is it, I can’t see the bottom?”

Menchi smiled. “Not to worry, at the bottom is a deep river. Now, watch and learn boys.”

She fell backwards down the cliff.

“This deep ravine happens to be home of the spider eagle. And she’s gone down to retrieve one of its eggs.” Netero informed the group. (Name) peeked over the cliff.

“Wow!”

Menchi climbed back up with ease, pulling the egg from her bra. “You might want to be a little careful, the river runs very fast so if you fall you’ll be whisked out to sea before you know what hit ya!”

(Name) handed her bag to Buhara. “Could you watch this for me, please?”

He nodded, the group gasping when she rushed forward and jumped. “(Name)!”

They all followed after her, (Name) holding onto one of the strings and swinging up to stand on one. “Whew, I’m awful at the balancing act!”

Kurapika stared at her, blinking. “(Name), please be careful.”

She blinked. “Oh, sorry. I’ll try.”

Killua glanced at her from his spot, already finding an egg. ‘She should be alright…’ he thought, before going back to his task.

The boy furrowed his eyebrows. ‘Why am I concerned for her safety? She’s just some woman…’

Eagles began attacking the contestants, (Name) managing to climb up to Kurapika. The boy held onto her, keeping her steady. “Did you get an egg?”

(Name) nodded, pointing to her chest. “I’m following Menchi’s example!”

The blonde blushed, quickly changing the subject. “… let’s climb up before the eagles come back.

———————

Menchi had them drop all of their eggs into a large pot. “Don’t think the test is over yet! You still have to boil them. Over cooking or under cooking will fail you!”

Buhara began to sweat, staring at the pot. (Name) placed a hand on his arm. “You alright, Buhara?”

“I think he knows something we don’t!”

The group began pulling their eggs out, (Name) patting his arm after. Menchi seemed pissed. “You couldn’t have made it anymore obvious!”

Menchi glanced at (Name) yet again, calming slightly. “This is an ordinary chicken egg, and this is a spider eagle egg. Now go ahead and compare how they taste!”

(Name) glanced at Menchi, before halving her egg and handing it to her. “Here!”

The woman blushed, taking it. “Oh, um… thank you, applicant 406.”

“My name is (Name).” She said with a sweet smile.

“Thank you, (Name).”

The women smiled, eating together. “Menchi, this is delicious! Wow, gourmet hunters sure know their stuff!”

The woman seemed to become flustered from (Name)’s praise. “I appreciate you taking the time to speak with us. Buhara told me how kind you were to him earlier. I…”

She shook her head, turning her attention to the group. “Listen up, for the second phase, 43 pass! Menchi’s Menu is over!”

The all cheered, (Name) pulling in her four friends in for a hug. “Hehe!”

The group boarded the airship, on their way to the next phase.

[cosmicdream222]

Some of my manifestations from last week (with photos)

Surprise gifts

My bestie A and I regularly update each other with about our daily plan for affirming etc to keep each other accountable. I said I was manifesting VIP treatment, put on some subs and affirmed while I was making breakfast (yes I’m not a morning person and make breakfast at nearly noon 😭)

Not even a half hour later, I received a surprise delivery from Amazon:

My friend L, who lives out of state, sent me food and new bowls for the stray cats I feed, and treats for my cats (Stella & Panini are my cats’ names 😹)

VIP treatment

That evening I worked a brand ambassador gig that I booked only a couple days before. I’ve been avoiding working as much as possible lately lol but this one was nearby and paid well. It happened to be a giveaway event partnering with a local radio station and ended up being fun. One of the radio DJs was there, and me as the sponsor brand representative was given the same level of VIP treatment as the radio DJ! There was an event coordinator who basically did all the work and I just got to stand around looking pretty and getting paid for it. 😭

Gift card

After work I got home and found another package from my friend L with a gift card for me 💕

More cat food

A few days later, my neighbor left a huge box of cat food at my door. My cats are getting more spoiled than me 😂

An air fryer

This one is cool because I specifically wanted to manifest this. I had heard about air fryers for a while now and it seemed like something I would use, but I didn’t really feel the need to buy one. A couple weeks ago I was at Trader Joe’s with my mom and the cashier was saying how much he loooved his air fryer and telling me all the things I could make with it. I decided that moment I would just manifest one eventually, and forgot about it.

So the other day my mom comes to pick me up for a family lunch and she has a huge box in her hands - an air fryer?? She says jokingly “happy birthday” - my birthday isn’t for another 4 months! She said she just felt like I needed one 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s so cute and I’ve already used it a couple times 💕

Attention from sp

Soo I have this crush-type guy we’ll call D. He’s one of my best friends and we’ve talked nearly every day for 3 years. I can talk to him about anything, including all things supernatural and shifting. We have admitted to having feelings for each other, and even had “online boyfriend” vibes for a while, but we live in different states, and he didn’t want to do long distance. I was sad and anxious about it for a while, but since I found out about loa and shifting, I realized none of it mattered and I could just shift to a reality where we’re together already 😂

Anyway I had become detached and stopped really thinking about him in a romantic way for a while. However, I realized since I basically didn’t care and wasn’t thinking about him, he was becoming distant in response. We hadn’t been really flirty or romantic in a few months, and I hadn’t even talked to him in a week, which was unusual. Although I wasn’t anxious about it or anything, I was still missing talking to one of my best friends. So I just started assuming he would go back to blowing up my phone all day, and I sent him some mental telepathy messages about what I wanted.

Monday morning he messaged me apologizing for being distant. He had been traveling for spring vacation and took a break from his phone. He then basically spent the whole week trying to make up for it, being super attentive, listening to my long ramblings about my void and shifting progress, sending me selfies every day, being more sweet and romantic than he had been in months, and kept telling me how pretty I was 🥰

Losing a follower LOL

This is just a funny one to round out my list. I hadn’t been on tumblr in a bit, and when I went to check my asks, I saw I had 556 followers. I thought “darn I missed the angel number, haha maybe someone will unfollow me so I can get the screenshot.” Not 5 min later when I went to look again, it had happened, and I got the screenshot 😂

(Up to 558 now thank you all 💕)

[sturdy-nerdy-stitchery]

Help Secure Stable Housing for Schluter Family. Click link below.

https://gofund.me/116f91d8

❤️Please read! Please share! This is my BFF Bestie! who is asking for help!❤️

I know I don't use tumblr very much these days, and when I do, it's when I need something. This time, it's my best friend, and I REALLY need this to spread! My best friend is nearing an eviction notice (due to circumstances beyond their control) unless they can come up with $4,800USD to catch up and cover rent.❤️ I'm doing what I can, therefore...𝙈𝙮 𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙥 𝙞𝙨 25% 𝙤𝙛𝙛! 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙙𝙤𝙡𝙡𝙖𝙧 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙙𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙎𝙘𝙝𝙡𝙪𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙂𝙁𝙈! Go get yourself some stitching!

(or donate at my Ko-Fi account at ko-fi.com/sturdynerdystitchery because there, you can get free patterns!)❤️

I have 3,200 followers. That's a wide audience. Those followers have dozens, if not thousands of followers. That's an even wider audience. People who have been in those shoes, can empathize, and can donate. Even if you can't donate, sharing is free and even THAT helps reach more people.

I've seen the community come together. I've seen other communities come together. Can we surpass that $4,800 goal? I sure hope so! 💰I've already done the first $100 donation...anyone want to match that?💰 We've all been, or know someone who has been, in those struggle shoes.

⭐TLDR: Husband's job started slashing everyone's pay by HALF, when they were already barely getting by. Sara found work, but it only pays minimum wage ($14.42) while she is doing her 6 weeks of training. Of which, she has one more month left. They are struggling so much, and now. Eviction notice. They have 2 kids, 2 dogs, and a kitty who just birthed kittens 2 weeks ago!

Please keep reading to hear the full story. Please!!! I don't want to lose my best friend! 😭😭😭 (plus, you'll get treated to kitten pictures)

This isn't a case of "Well, maybe they should have...." because those sentiments are NOT what is needed right now! Those sentiments DO NOT help! It's not a matter of giving up Starbucks. It's about a shitty employer who cares nothing for it's employees.

Donating, no matter how big or how small, makes a difference. Even if you can't donate, sharing is free, it helps reach a wider audience, and that in and of itself makes a difference.

I know that often, when a GoFundMe comes into a feed, it's less likely to get shared if you don't know the person. Well, I know this person. Sara, her husband David, and their 2 kids moved to Colorado a year ago. Along with their Golden Retriever, Mia, their Brindle pupper, Kelce, their kitty who just had 3 kittens. Aren't they cute!

We became friends over the summer. Since then, she has wormed her way into my heart and for the first time since WE moved to Colorado in 2019, I can gratefully say that I found a best friend BFF bestie who would be my ride or die, and vice versa.

She was living with her father in order to save up for their own place. She had to move out because it was a horribly abusive situation and she had to get her family away for their safety.

They found a house to rent, and have been there several months.

A few weeks after they moved in, they get notice that her husband's job is slashing everyone's pay in half. DoorDashing to make up the difference wasn't doing it. Countless job applications, and her husband is still struggling to find work.

She found work, however. They only pay minimum wage while she is doing her 6 weeks of training (Bullshit, I know). She still has 1 month to go.

They have a 2 year old and a 12 year old. The pets. Their everything.

That everything could be gone because we live in a society that treats people so unfairly. They might have to move back to Missouri.

She is waiting on the mail today. Waiting for that eviction notice, and it breaks my heart into a million pieces. I cried this morning. She is a good friend, a good mom, a good provider. Her husband is hard working, a stand up man. Work gave him the shit end of the stick.

She is panicking. She says she has never been more afraid in her life. She doesn't have to say it, but I know she feels broken, and defeated.

I refuse to lose my best friend to circumstances that she had no control over. Her husband is still looking for a new job. Even if she looked for a new job while currently working, and happened to find one...it still won't help cover what they need.

My heart is breaking.💔 So much. I know that some might think it selfish of me to use my social media for personal reasons, but this reason is important to me. This reason is my best friend.

So, pleeeeaaaaseee! even if it's only a dollar. Or even better, if someone is rolling in dough and can drop the entire $4,800!

[hazelfoureyes]

To add onto the ace conversation, I wanna add my journey!

TW it gets kinda heavy at the end-

My journey was literally SO messy omg and this is gonna sound so silly but

My mom and I used to watch this show called rupauls drag race when I was little. I used to think the men were pretty and all when they were out of drag but WHEN THEY WERE IN DRAG??? omg I was in love, I thought they were so pretty 😭. NOW YOU CAN SEE WHY THIS IS CONFUSING. Technically, they are men, but they look like women, and you only like them when they look like women. I was scared and confused with this newfound information so I repressed it 💀

During my teen years, ig I was just like everyone else, a lil sex obsessed freak (idk how to put it but YKNO HOW PEOPLE ACTED IN HIGH SCHOOL 😭 ). Watch porn, reading smut, the whole shebang. I eventually found out I like both girls and boys (with a preference for girls). BUT one day I sat down and realized I haven’t had a real crush with a real life person since like elementary school 🧍‍♀️

Everyone was losing their virginity’s and talking about how great sex was and blah blah blah. It’s embarrassing but I thought sex was gonna be AWESOME and I COULD NOT WAIT to just GET RID of mine 💀. Like if I lost my virginity it would put everything in place.

Jump forward to when I’m 19-20 and I get my first “real” boyfriend. I was kinda out? I was telling my friends what I was bisexual. I told my boyfriend when we were in the “talking stage” and he was really supportive, or so I thought, long story short he was just like, THE WORST PERSON EVER. He was sexually/emotionally abusive, 0/10 person.

⚠️TW: S*XUAL ASSAULT, DR*GS, R*PE⚠️

⚠️ I wanna say that I’m only laughing about this because it’s my coping mechanism ig but I just wanna say that there was multiple instances that he used to take advantage of me while I was under the influence and then gaslight me into thinking it was ok the day after.

If they’re is ANYONE reading this that is in a situation like I was in, please for the love of god leave them. NO it’s NOT normal. They don’t love you. The abuse will only get worse the longer you stay. ⚠️

And on top of all that HE OUTED ME 🧍‍♀️ so that was fun. Anyways back to the sex, it was bad. I thought men not knowing where the clit is was a meme but it’s true 😭 mans would rub my left lip for 5 minutes and act if I came. Losing my virginity DID NOT “put everything in place”. Well i guess maybe it did in a sense. I never wanted to do it again.

But on the other hand, I’ve read that sex is a beautiful thing. Deep down, some parts of me yearn to have that special connection with someone. I want to feel what real love is. What it’s really like to make love. And not just have someone tell me they love me while they selfishly use me. Words are just words but I know there has to be more to it.

Anyways that’s where my journey is right now, I’ve been doing some real soul searching these past few months. Tumblr has really helped me in trying to figure this whole thing out. Am I ace? Idk. But it’s what I closely resonate with for the time being.

God labels are confusing as hell 😭 why can’t I just be me

I’m me-sexual 🥳

I was a little worried at first sharing this as it is heavy! But, the fact is, sometimes we are waiting for someone to bring up a heavy topic so we can share/vent our own story. Certain heavy topics just...don't come up often or organically. So I hope if someone needs it they can use this as a reason to start a conversation they've been waiting for a chance to have!

What happened to you was beyond unacceptable treatment and I am so so sorry you had to suffer through that literal abuse. I suffered through quite a bit myself and it really skewed and damaged my relationship to sex for a long time in ways I couldn’t perceive so I absolutely hear you! It sounds like you’re doing the heavy lifting of trying to heal and be a fully formed you and I’m so proud of you! The hardest part is acknowledging that hey, maybe there’s some shit still left to figure out about myself.

As you continue in life you may find your awful experiences had some effect on how you view and enjoy (or not enjoy) sex.

I am a huge advocate for sexual health, in knowing yourself intimately for your own pleasure but also for safety and comfort!

I really hope you’ve taken time to learn about yourself and what things you like and don’t like when it comes to physical pleasure. If that’s something you have an interest in!

Personally I’ve thought I hated things and later realized nooo I just experienced it first with someone terrible at it. 😅 but when I did it I found it kicked ass. (**cough** anal **cough cough*)

There is more to sex, I hear! I’ve never made love and the idea is so unattractive to me, but! Darling, sex does exist thats full of love and connection and meaning that serves so many more purposes than getting off. So I’m adamantly told! If it’s something you want I hope you find someone or someones who can provide it. 🥺

It’s so funny you mention horny teenagers because in middle school and into high school everyone was pairing up. And I thought, “Relationships are what you do when you want sex. And I don’t need sex. I’m still young. So… why would I get a boyfriend? My friends fulfill my needs otherwise.” (Still….so closeted 😂)

Because I was aromantic and the term just like—- didn’t exist in my world so I didn’t know, I didn’t realize people were dating for non-sex reasons 💀 but then I got a boyfriend and had sex in high school and was like “OH SHIT THIS IS THE BEST?? AM I A NYMPHO NOW. MY HAND COULD NEVER?”

The beautiful thing about still being here is that you have the freedom and the time to decide or not decide anything! Research, talk to people and read in forums of people learning to find their place. Question everything— are there parts of people you find sexually attractive? If yes, okay let’s start there! I realized I was pansexual first because of my attraction to androgyny. “I’m not a lesbian—- dick good. But also… pussy good??? Tits good??? That person could have any of those things and.. I don’t care? I still want them carnally?!”

If no sexual attraction to people at all (pretty standard definition Ace in that case!), then okie dokie, totally can still want to enjoy sex! It’s more than about sexual attraction as we are cerebral creatures. That’s still valid! If you did want to be physically intimate are there things you’d be okay with doing and not doing? Or things you’d want to do that maybe you couldn’t with certain people? Is your idea of what sex is being really narrowed down being of the culture you’re in? Just some questions for yourself. So many things to consider if you haven’t already! Not for finding a label but making sure you can express what you want and need when you’re in a situation to receive it. 💝

I didn’t know anything about Asexuality until hazbin and that made me look at my partner and be like “yoooooo I know you’re an older Japanese man but I have a new English word for you to learn.”

Before I knew pansexuality existed I told people who asked my sexuality, “I’ve never been disappointed when someone got naked.” Because I didn’t identify with the “women and men” definition of bisexuality, the gender didn’t matter and the sexual organs were all just bonuses for me. But I didn’t know a word existed for how I felt.

And hey, it got the point across! I lacked a community to feel welcomed in but I was still able to love and be loved how I wanted to be and that’s the most important part of this. As long as you can still articulate what you want and need in this stage of your life then baby cakes you’re doing perfectly fine in your journey! Which it sounds like you already know very well 💖🥹

[transmasc-advice-blog]

I really want a binder. I’ve got the purchase cued up and everything, but I asked my mom a while back to help me buy one and she wasn’t exactly supportive. What should I do? Should I buy tape? I’m losing my mind here 😭

sounds like the issue is money? correct me if i’m wrong.

one roll of transtape is cheaper than one binder, but overall transtape will be more expensive (one roll will only last a few months).

one option is to ask some friends if they can help out. you could also try talking to your mom again. provide her with some resources on how binders are safe, things like that.

Point of Pride gives away free binders, so does FTM Essentials and OUT Maine.

good luck!

[scavengerssuccotash]

What are your thoughts on a Clint x Nat baby? I’ve read some fics where Nat accidentally gets pregnant and debates between keeping the baby or not. But I’ve also read a few fics where they both desperately want a baby and excel as parents once they have one. Personally I think Nat would be terrified if she was pregnant but eventually come around to the idea, because it’s a lil part of her and Clint, and be a great mom.

How did you know about my Sims 4 Clintasha save file?

(They have a daughter named Katya. And she’s fucking adorable.) 😭

Kid/baby Clintasha fics are definitely a real guilty pleasure for me. While I don’t agree with how Whedon presented that bit of character backstory for Natasha, I think taken with in universe logic it would make sense for the Red Room to sterilize their Widows. (It’s one of the few things that is canon that I’ve kept for my fic Sightline.)

(I ALSO have a real big problem with the tone in which it was discussed and handled in the Black Widow movie but let’s just skip over that for now.)

I think Clint and Nat would be exceptional parents. Extremely doting and highly protective I must admit I see them a bit of a helicopter parent duo. At least until the age of ten I want to say, when they start to loosen up their reigns as they finally start to believe that their child is safe. I think they would also retire from both SHIELD and Avenging, I don’t think Natasha much less Clint would be able to handle the separation and uncertainty in leaving for missions for months at a time. Clint is also immediately a girl dad. (I can’t help but picture Jeremy Renner a bit as I type this. Which hilariously shines a glaring light on my own father issues, but like in a ‘awww I wish o had that!’ way.)

I think it’s rather a cliche in the fandom to imagine them having a little girl, and I’m firmly one million percent within that camp. I genuinely can’t picture them having a boy for their first kid. (Yes, I said first. They have two! A girl and a boy roughly three years apart. They live in my head as a happy little family on a farm in the cornfields of Iowa and I love them very much.)

As for the pregnancy—it was fucking brutal! For my headcanon of a non-sterilized Natasha the Red Room kept them continually supplied with birth control and other hormonal blockers to the point that it was actually assumed that she would not be able to get pregnant or at the very least it would be rare. That one in a million chance happened after a particularly nasty fight when Natasha ran into the line of fire to save Steve. Cue a couple of thrown dishes and Clint growling into her ear and pinned to the bed.

“I’m not fucking losing you, do you hear me, Tasha!”

It was very hot and very intense and oops!

What really was difficult about the pregnancy, you know besides being pregnant (her back hurt like a son of a birch) was the emotional torrent that it brought. Sleepless nights, constant worry, questioning if she even wanted to keep it, followed by a surreal disbelief that she was even pregnant. It was a body horror watching and then feeling a tiny baby growing inside her. In the end she decided to keep it, partly as one last fuck you to the Red Room and her past but also because it was part Clint too. When she told him, it was in the middle of a firefight. (He would later tell her that her timing was shit.) As soon as the words left her mouth he looked at her for a good five seconds, blinked and then nodded to himself. He then, without any of the fanfare, dispatched the ten guys shooting at them, clean kills. All ten headshots. One right after the other with the cold efficiency she’s only ever seen once before when she was captured and tortured for three months.

Katya Philomena Romanoff-Barton was born November 16th. Three months premature, and weighing two pounds and thirteen ounces. She has blue eyes like her father and the freckles and red hair of her mother. They were able to bring her home after a year in the NICU.

She starts her Freshmen year at Princeton this year, double majoring in International Politics and Psychology, with an applied minor in History. She has one championship trophy in Olympic Archery and does Ballet in her free time.

[sunflowerwilds]

my friend silver did it (months ago at this point) and i'm such a sucker for talking non-stop about my ocs so here's all the oc emoji ask questions with my beloved hone,,,,,

people 👁️ EYE - what colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical…)? ▸soft blue with purple sectoral heterochromia in both eyes! no one really notices since heterochromia isn't uncommon in the sun's reach. 🤥 LYING - are they good liars? do they have tells to show they’re lying? ▸nah he's a terrible liar. people see right through him. his most common lie is trying to say he's alright when in severe physical pain because he doesn't want to worry anyone...no one buys it.

👻 GHOST - do they believe in ghosts? what are their “ghostly experiences”, if any? ▸the afterlife canonically does not exist in ASHES, so neither do ghosts. that said, hone likes to believe that his parents are with him in spirit, even though he knows that can't possibly be true.

💥 COLLISON - what emotions do they have trouble dealing with? ▸overwhelmingly grief. he has a really hard time coping with loss since he has never really been given the time to grieve. he also struggles with loneliness and the fear of losing himself.

😭 CRYING - what makes them cry? do they cry easily? ▸experiencing any strong emotions, when he gets lost in thought, reminiscing about the past, etc etc. i wouldn't say he cries easily, but he is prone to it- he's not the kind of guy to hold it in.

👊 PUNCH - are they quick to violence? ▸absolutely not. he will only draw his sword(s) as a last resort and even then he'd do his best to not injure his opponent if he can help it. he will do everything in his power to avoid conflict.

💢 ANGER - what are some habits they have that will take some getting used to? ▸when he gets lost in his head it's hard to get through to him since he has to come to by himself. he's also incredibly stubborn/steadfast in his beliefs and that gets particularly on mug's nerves. he has a bad habit of downplaying the intensity of pain he's in.

👪 FAMILY - what is their family like? what is your ocs relationship to them? does your oc have any siblings? ▸hone has his mom and dad! he's an only child. his parents would do anything in the world for him and he loves them to no end. he also has his extended family on his mother's side, those of which he gets along with to varying degrees.

😨 FEARFUL - when scared, do they go into “flight” or “fight”? ▸definitely fight, but more so in the sense that he'd stand his ground. would 100% put himself in harms way to protect someone he cares about.

💤 SLEEPING - do they fall asleep easily? what helps them sleep? ▸yes. aside from his four year coma, hone can and does fall asleep anywhere with relative ease. once he's out, he's out. the further into the plot the more frequently he sleeps because as things progress, he becomes more physically tired all the time.

-=-=-=-=-=-=- food & drinks 🥞 PANCAKE - what is their comfort breakfast? ▸he's doesn't really eat breakfast, but anything home-cooked by a family member he'd consider comforting! if i had to pick something though, i'd say some kind of breakfast meat and eggs.

🎂 BIRTHDAY CAKE - when is their birthday? do they like celebrating it? ▸dec 30th! as a kid/teen he used to really like it because he could be surrounded by family and friends- he hasn't gotten the chance to celebrate one as an adult yet since he was asleep for four years. 🍩 DONUT - favourite sweet treat? ▸any kind of cobbler or crumble!

🍟 FRIES - do they order food often? or they prefer to cook their own food? ▸nowadays he buys inexpensive things for the road that can be kept for long term such as salted meats and dried fruits. he does know a few basic things he learned from his mom growing up and he'd like to learn more one day if he gets the chance to settle down.

☕️ HOT BEVERAGE - do they prefer hot or cold drinks? what is their favourite drink? ▸hot drinks! his favourite was a floral tea his parents gave him whenever he had one of his 'attacks' growing up. bonus: hone's such a lightweight and can't hold his alcohol, but he likes small sips of fruity cocktails.

🍓 STRAWBERRY - do they eat their fruit & veg? what is their favourite fruit or vegetable? ▸both! doesn't prefer one over the other as he's not picky. favourite fruit: persimmons or peaches; favourite vegetable: beetroot or fennel

🍰 CAKE SLICE - favourite cake flavour? are they specific about types of cakes? ▸probably just vanilla with buttercream. again, he's not picky about food!

🍧 SHAVED ICE - do they still have any objects from their childhood? what significance does it have to them? what would their reaction be if they lost it? ▸unfortunately no :( the closest thing would be his father's old order badge as it's the only keepsake he has to remember his parents by. he would be bummed if he lost it, but considering his reluctant willingness to part with it early in the plot means it wouldn't be the end of the world for him. luckily he was able to keep it. -=-=-=-=-=-=-

plants & nature 💐 BOUQUET - create a bouqet for them! what do those flowers mean? are any of the flowers their particular favourite? ▸poppies-- consolation, remembrance, death; hyssop-- protection, health, sacrifice; and gladiolus-- moral integrity and strength of character ehehehe. poppies are his favourite.

🌙 MOON - what is your oc’s greatest wish? how far are they willing to go for it? ▸this is hard to answer because it goes into spoiler territory regarding his character arc so i will refrain for now, but know that this wish is something he is willing to die for.

🌋 VOLCANO - how bad is their temper? is it a slow boil, or a instant explosion? ▸he's definitely slow to anger. it takes a lot and the right trigger to make hone upset, and even then his temper is pretty mellow.

🌺 HIBISCUS - do they have any allergies? ▸nope!

🍁 MAPLE LEAF - what is their favourite season? why? ▸fall! it's the perfect time for hearty food likes stews (his favourite food is rabbit stew), the temperature is perfect and the colors of the leaves remind him of his boyfriend <3

🍃 FALLING LEAF - do they enjoy being in nature? what is their favourite outdoor activity? ▸yes! hone spends more time outside than inside mostly due to circumstance. his favourite activity is horseback riding; either free riding or being out on a trail, he just enjoys being with horses.

☀️ SUN - are they a morning person? what is the first thing they do in the morning? ▸entirely depends. his status as a morning person or not completely varies on how much sleep he gets.

🕷️ SPIDER - what is their biggest fear? do they have any irrational / mundane fears? ▸death and the loss of one's self. he's also afraid of his own body failing him at the worst possible time.

🌹 ROSE - do they like valentines day? have they been confessed to before? have they confessed to anyone before? ▸sort of. he doesn't like that it focuses too much on romantic love and believes other types of loves should be recognized too. but on the other hand, he's 100% the one to have confessed his feelings to sylvan first... except they've never been able to spend this day together for reasons...

🙈 SEE-NO-EVIL - whats a side of your oc that they don’t want to show other people? ▸he wants to ignite hope in others but is having a hard time coping with his physical exhaustion and fatigue. he doesn't want people to see him in this perpetual state of decline.

🙊 SPEAK-NO-EVIL - what is something your oc will refuse to stay quiet about? ▸he will not stand for anyone speaking ill of his father and will defend his him. he's also not a fan of diurne or his dogma and holds many reservations about the clergy's actions to follow through with it.

🙉 HEAR-NO-EVIL - what is the worse thing your oc could hear from someone? ▸anyone trying to use his parents or their deaths as a means of insulting or taunting him; in addition, he does not take kindly to those who joke about or take death lightly.

🌱 SEEDLING - what is their most vivid memory from childhood? ▸if he had to pick one: a summer trip with his parents and sylvan to their vacation home. this trip is where he and sylvan reaffirmed their feelings for each other.

🍀 CLOVER - do they believe in luck? are they lucky? ▸not particularly. if anything he's ambivalent to the concept.

🌏 EARTH - will they give up the world for someone they love? is this decision easy for them? ▸no.

🌌 MILKY WAY - what was the inspiration behind your oc? what was the first thing you decided about them? ▸hone came out of literally nowhere during one of the worst periods of my life (at the time). like mug and imura, he was a dnd oc and the first thing i decided about him was he was a catboy with two swords. the dnd version of him and the current version of him are two very different characters. ▸the dnd campaign required our characters have a curse. i stole the fire on his chest from sonic and the secret rings and went, "ok but what if, unlike the game, it actually was a threat" and spiraled from there. funnily enough, he's not the first character i've done that with. he wasn't even the phoenix at this point either, just a random guy. ▸if i had to pinpoint any other inspirations, it'd have to be link from the legend of zelda, especially skyward sword's. though if i'm being honest, tloz is my biggest inspiration for everything i write, even if i don't realize it right away so this comes as no real surprise to me. ▸an additional source of inspiration i've found in retrospect since starting this post, is the player character from persona 3. -=-=-=-=-=-=-

activity ⚾ BASEBALL - can they play sports? what is their best position if they play a team sport? what’s their strong suit (speed, power etc.)? ▸if swordplay counts as a sport then sure! hone is ambidextrous and is able to fight using two swords. his strong suit would have to be his adaptability as things like speed and power completely depend on his physical well-being at the time.

🏊 SWIMMING - can they swim? or are they afraid of water? how well do they swim? how do they feel about swimming in the ocean? ▸yes. he's pretty average and doesn't do so very often. he's never swam in the ocean before so he'd probably be a bit hesitant at first but ultimately be pretty neutral. -=-=-=-=-=-=-

objects 📣 MEGAPHONE - how loud are they? what do they speak like? got a voice claim? ▸depends on who he's around. normally, anywhere between a regular speaking voice and a quieter, more withdrawn tone. he does raise his voice when worked up but it takes a lot to get to that point. his voice claim is khoi dhao!

📖 OPEN BOOK - do they like reading? what’s their favourite genre? ▸he doesn't dislike reading but he prefers other, more active activities. his favourite genre(s) would probably be anything that correlated with his other interests: like xenofiction feat. horses or some adventure with fun sword fights.

🪤 MOUSE TRAP - what will always lure them into certain danger? a loved one in danger? a promise of something they are always searching for? ▸the possibility of answer(s); about himself or even his predecessor. anything that can potentially help him better understand what's going on in the present.

🎭 MASKS - do they act differently around certain people? what’s different between the way they act around friends, family, strangers, etc.? ▸when he was a kid, he was incredibly friendly to everyone around him. nowadays he's very wary of strangers and seems to actively avoid the order. he's super affectionate with family and friends and only really opens up to those he feels safe around.

✂️ SCISSORS - what is the “last straw” for them to cut someone out of their life? how easily do they let go of people? ▸he doesn't know what its like to actively cut someone from his life because he's always been on the receiving end, the one who was left behind.

💡 LIGHTBULB - is your oc a planner? do they write down every small detail or just wing it? ▸everything hone does is completely by the seat of his pants. this guy has no clue what he's doing at any given moment.

💎 DIAMOND - how rich are they? can they live the lifestyle they want to? ▸growing up, his family was fairly wealthy because of cairn's position as the former order head. his parents didn't spoil him but he was allowed to have a few luxuries- like toys or treats, especially after his 'attacks'. they wanted him to have a comfortable childhood. he lost access to his inheritance when he disappeared and now has pretty much nothing other than the few things gifted to him by his remaining family (his horse and swords). he hasn't gotten the chance to discover what his lifestyle as an adult is like.

🎁 PRESENT - what types of presents would they be most happy to receive? are they good at gift giving? ▸food! a meal is all he could ask for. some quality time with his loved ones as well. other than flowers for sylvan, he's not good with tangible gifts.

🍼 BABY BOTTLE - what are their thoughts on children? ▸has never considered having kids and probably won't. he doesn't mind them though; he gets along really well with his young cousins and mugwort.

🔪 KNIFE - how do they react to injury / misfortune befalling their loved ones (significant other, family, friends)? do they put themselves at blame? ▸if it's something minor, he'll drop whatever he's doing to rush over to help. if the injury is significant enough, it'll put him in a state of temporary despair before he gets angry and protective. depending on if he could have prevented it, he would blame himself.

👑 CROWN - what does your oc want to be remembered as? why? ▸*see answer for moon

✏️ PENCIL - is there a particular quote / lyric that you associate with them? ▸i could hear the signs calling out from the bottom of the fire

🎵 MUSIC NOTE - what is their playlist like? do you associate a particular song with them? ▸ https://open.spotify.com/playlist/15IekAEKcogAHJ1XL7Wkee?si=11623cbee98445a3

🎤 MICROPHONE - are they good at singing? what is their go-to karaoke song? ▸ he has a good singing voice but his talents go unused aside from sometimes humming a specific song he claims he's heard in his dreams.

🎷 SAXOPHONE - do they play any instruments? are they any good at it? ▸ nope.

📚 BOOKS - how were they at school? what is their best subject? what is their worst subject? do they have a favourite subject? ▸schools aren't really a thing in the sun's reach. education is placed upon parents or people with specialties they hire to teach their children. therefore, subjects vary wildly and often times kids can chose what to learn. hone was an avid learner, but he had to actively do the thing he was taught or else it wouldn't stick. his favourite was anything outside or required he be active and his least favourite would probably be more 'academically' leaning lessons, such as math or writing.

👖 JEANS - what is their go-to outfit? ▸aside from not being able to properly wear a shirt, his go to outfit is a pair of riding pants and boots. aside from pink, he likes monochromatic or neutral dark colors. ideally he'd like to wear something a little... more but because of the fire, he overheats so he's making do with the vest. somehow he always manages to find a replacement for the pants he grows out of.

🎨 PALETTE - can they draw? what do they like to draw? ▸not well.

⏳ HOURGLASS - are they usually late or on-time? ▸early!

🔫 PISTOL - do they trust people easily? ▸no. he's always been rather cautious of strangers but now more so than ever. that said, once you have his trust, you have it for life.

📎 PAPERCLIP - a random fact. ▸hone learned he was ambidextrous through his sword lessons and spars with sylvan. growing up he used to solely write with his left hand since he would mimic his dad; now he'll use either but his handwriting is significantly better with his left.

❇️ SPARKLE - what is their most prized possession? what do they value? ▸it's between his father's old badge and the swords that he left for him. both act as a symbol of protection for him and the latter are even named in his parent's honour.

📏 RULER - is your oc well educated? where did they get their learning from? ▸*see answer for books; he's as well educated as his parents could provide for him. -=-=-=-=-=-=-

weather 🌩️ LIGHTNING - are they scared of lightning? ▸nope.

🌪️ TORNADO - what is the biggest change you’ve ever made to them? how have they changed from their original version? ▸making him the phoenix reborn! i brought it up in a few other points but he was literally just some guy before. this gave him better purpose in the narrative and higher stakes. fun fact: additionally, the reveal of this was supposed to be end of the story information, the climax, like a big twist reveal but then i didn't have a story leading up to that point so it was changed to much closer to the beginning.

🌈 RAINBOW - what advice would they give to their younger self? ▸"life may be difficult sometimes; it may seem like the world is out to get you and beat you down... but there's always a light on the other side and people who care for you. pick yourself up, carry on and live that life to the fullest, surrounded by the people you love. be yourself and not what the world expects you to be."

🔥 FIRE - do they have any self destructive tendencies? what habits do they have that hinder them from becoming their best self? ▸ [answered] ▸he often feels he's responsible for more than he truly is based on expectations placed upon him. he also pushes himself too hard physically without allowing for supple amounts of rest. with a little nudge from the people who care about him, he has to remind himself to be more gentle and that he doesn't have to carry the world on his shoulders... but he often just falls back in to the same spirals. ☁️ CLOUD - a soft headcanon ▸he purrs in his sleep

🌟 GLOWING STAR - what do they think about when they look at the night sky? is there someone they want to star gaze with? ▸spoilers for the first half! sorry. he likes stargazing with mugwort.

🌠 SHOOTING STAR - if they could make any wish with no repercussions, what wish would they make? ▸he'd wish for his chronic pain to go away for good!!

☄️ COMET - what do people assume about them? are they right? ▸depends on what people do or don't know about him via rumours and the like. for the most part people just find him strange. some assume he's really skilled with a sword and while this is true, he's not likely to draw them unless he has no other choice. -=-=-=-=-=-=-

hearts 💓 BEATING HEART - what gets their heart racing? ▸sylvan <3

💘 HEART W/ ARROW - what traits do they look for in a relationship? do they believe in love at first sight? ▸he's only have had sights for one person and only after they were long-term friends first did it grow into something more. he wouldn't know what to look for in another relationship since he's not looking. no, does not believe in love at first sight.

💗 GROWING HEART - if they have a crush, is it noticable? what changes when they’re in love? ▸hard to tell because he's affectionate toward everyone close to him.

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)? ▸quality time, words of affirmation, physical touch

💚 GREEN HEART - what things make your oc feel comforted? hugs, kisses, food? ▸hugs, someone playing with/combing through his hair, any of his favourite foods.

💖 SPARKLING HEART - are they a subtle or a showy lover? ▸subtle :>

💔 BROKEN HEART - what could their partner do that would absolutely break their heart? ▸give up on themself

[yourlowkeyidiot3]

Wait in like a few weeks schools gonna start again

NO

I DON'T WANNA GO BACK TO SCHOOL

😭😭😭😭😭

Kill me kill me please I barley survived last year I barley survived all those years actually I can't do it all over again. NO

WHEN DID SUMMER WENT BY SO FAST LIKE HUH?? THE FUCK YOU MEAN IT'S BEEN 3 MONTHS??? I SWEAR IT'S ONLY BEEN A WEEK

No no no no no no no no no no

I don't even believe in God but I pray to him some miracle will happen. I don't even know what. Just anything that will prevent school from starting again.

God please save me I'm sorry I'll turn Christian again I swear

Zeus strick me down please

Anything

Please I'll take anything I'm on KNEES BEGGING PLEASE I DON'T WANNA GO BACK TO SCHOOL 😭😭😭😭

I can't keep telling myself "just make it till summer/holidays/etc" it's starting to drive me mad I'm not kidding school makes me feel like I'm gonna lose whatever sanity I have left.

The only good thing about school is that I like the food they sell on the...uhhh idk what they're called in English. Uh τα κυλικεία.. Google translate says it's called canteens but Idk

But ANYTHING ELSE SUCKS

THE TEACHERS AND THE STUDENTS ARE EQUALLY AS BAD BRO IT'S ALMOST LIKE THEY AGREED IN A GROUP CHAT TO SUCK EQUALLY CUZ I GENUINELY CANNOT DECIDE IF MY TEACHERS OR IF MY CLASSMATES ARE WORSE

Actually nvm my classmates are worse because I can totally see most of them becoming criminals and drug dealers when they grow up

Actually nvm that. I DID HAD A CLASSMATE WHO ACTUALLY SELLED DRUGS

Classic Greek ΕΠΑΛ school ig???????

And those GOD AWFUL BATHROOMS THAT I REFUSE TO EVEN STEP IN THAT LOOK AND SMELL LIKE THEY HAVEN'T BEEN CLEANED IN DECADES...

And that JERKASS OLD MAN OF A PRINCIPAL I HAD. I COULDN'T EVEN STAND TO SEE HIS FACE OR HEAR HIS VOICE. HE WAS A FUCKING JERKASS FOR NO FUCKING REASON I SWEAR TO GOD IF I HAVE TO SEE HIM AGAIN I WILL THROW HANDS.

I'LL BOMB THE SCHOOL

BURN IT TO ASHES

JUST TO MAKE SURE THAT I WON'T HAVE TO EVER SEE HIM AGAIN

AND IF I DO

I'M SWINGING IMIDIENTLY

Goddamn I have to go back to this damn circle of waking up miserable at 7am with 3-4 hours of sleep wishing a car hits me before making it to school. Basically be non existent in class for like 6 hours and then go home and listen to my mom tell me to do my homework and study while knowing damn well I'm not ever gonna pick up any book? AND THEN REPEAT ALL THAT UNTIL SUMMER COMES AGAIN???? AND THEN WORK MYSELF TO DEATH TO STUDY FOR THOSE FUCKING FINAL EXAMS??????

I quit

I QUIT

FUCKING KILL ME ALREADY I CAN'T DO THIS

😭😭😭

[kafus]

i would super love to hear another cool pokemon story if there's one you wanna share!! literally anything; all your pokemon posts are so interesting and engaging to read ♡ also!!! i hope you're doing well and finding reason to smile each day

ogh THANK U i hope ur doing well as well

one of these days i might run out of stories 😭 BUT i don’t think i’ve talked about the pokemon competition i went to when i was around 8 years old??? and i’ve been thinking about that recently so why not

i’ve talked before about how my interest in pokemon as a young person was defined by loneliness/isolation and how i never really had the social pokemon experience that most people did, so the few times i actually got to interact with other people over the shared interest stick out very strongly in my brain. in particular when i was i Think 8 years old, there used to be a small family-owned video game store in my town (it shut down a long time ago unfortunately, i miss it) and they ran events sometimes. i managed to find out they were running a singles competition in pokemon battle revolution, and my mom actually agreed to taking me

it’s important to keep in mind that i was like 8 and i didn’t know shit about competitive battling. i loved sinnoh and had pokemon i thought were strong but at this time i didn’t even know natures affected stats. i was an inexperienced little girl and i just brought my team of in-game guys that i liked. amusingly i was the only girl there, i just remember walking in and being surrounded by boys LOL both my age and older, like there were some older teens and maaaybe adults idk

anyway all things considered i actually got decently far because competitive mons was much more niche back then and no one knew what they were doing LMAO. i was mostly pitting my in-game mons against other kids’ in-game mons. i knew type matchups by heart and had some pretty decent pokemon to my memory - i don’t remember my entire team but i know i had torterra and articuno at least (articuno was one of my favorite pokemon at the time)

eventually i was… like… idk right before semi finals? i wasn’t quite in the top 4, i think i was in the top 8? i went up against an older boy who actually knew what he was doing and had a genuine competitive team. i’m not sure how old he actually was, at the time anyone above the age of 13 looked like an adult to me lol, i’m guessing in retrospect he was 17 or something. he THOROUGHLY kicked my ass with fucking BLISSEY TOXIC STALL lmao. at the time i was dumbfounded at how his blissey just took no fucking damage and it’s really funny being able to understand what happened in retrospect, i kept bringing my special attackers not being aware of blissey’s extremely lopsided defensive stats.

you’d think i would have been upset about losing but i was moreso really impressed with this guy’s blissey, and then smth i’ll never forget, after i lost he shook my hand and looked at me in the eyes and said that i did a good job and that i should keep playing pokemon because he thinks from the way that i played that i had a lot of potential. i was literally over the moon, it meant so much to be acknowledged with full seriousness by someone so much older than me who also lest we forget literally just beat my ass with toxic stall lol. having my interest in pokemon validated and being told i was good at it just made my entire week. or month. or year tbh.

nowadays that i’m a ribbon master mod and going to my first regionals next month, i think about that guy a lot. perhaps i was a late bloomer but i think whatever he saw in me was real. not that i’m the best pokemon player ever or something, and i’m certainly still learning a lot about vgc in particular, but like. yeah i do really care about this game and i think i have the potential to be good at it. and it was prophesized long agodjdjdk

always be nice to kids cause small gestures like that can stick with someone for the rest of their life tbh

[oodlesndoodles]

I WROTE A LOT

KALE LORE:

she was a very.. interesting child before she fell down! Always close with her peers, hugging holding hands arms pinkies ect! Of course if you’re from america (I’m American but I know other countries have less of what we call a “bubble” of space between you and another person? We’re just very awkward people when it comes to touch ;^;) you know that even this type of hands on isn’t allowed in schools, you’re suppose to lee your hands or yourself! The teachers were lose when it came to Kale though, do to not having any other reason to yell at her. She’s, to put mildly, a bit of a teachers pet. Teased by her peers for that and her mother, who before the fall wasn’t the greatest. 

Thus letting her child wander UP A MOUNTAIN.(kale why you gotta walk so far 😭😭) and She was picking flowers for her mother! A hope that her mom would “act like a mom” to our little kale. Who’s becoming more self aware that her mothers parenting is more laid back and non contact then her friends. (If asked, her father is out of the picture due to illness) 

the early teenager slips and falls down into mt. ebbot, of course she assumes that during her rather long fall that she will not survive this, I mean she was in the air for half a minute. It was a BIG FALL. She landed on a bed of yellow flowers, some thorns prodding Kale through her clothes. 

After a few minutes on the ground, a small child greets and helps her up(flowey >:-) yeah that’s right spot.. you and that one magma gave me an idea for flowey) The child makes sure she’s okay before the run down of, soul, LV, monsters, and the well known quote “it’s killed or be killed” this spooks our little K, she makes it all uncomfortable when she starts bawling her eyes out.

Flowey is unpleased but offers the girl help, to just take one of their “monster candy” (a lie for her to touch a pellet!!) she does and it hurts, being a weak non LV hungry human. Her HP only reached to a maximum of 40. 

Kale goes to run but is met with a flower, had the child sticking out of the flower. She screamed and scrambled away. And slowly but surely we get flowey. Then our queen Toriel will save our small human!! 

Jae stays with Tori for months, growing attached to the mother figure she always wanted. Soon she gets curious and snoops around, reading a bit too much of some notes in toriel’s room. Toriel has taken notes on how to look more like Kale’s mother. 

Kale didn’t want that, she didn’t need to see her mother ever again. She gets scared and runs down the ruins to escape. (Barely) dodging fire attacks along the way as she bolts to the large doors. Just squeezing through before scrambling through the snow. 

At this point she reaches snowdin! Slowly wandering her way through the snowy forest. After some walking, she meets pretender and the “don’t you know how to greet a pal” when kale turned around, she was a very very extra wet cat looking human. I assume pretender had very little faith that she’ll make it longer than the last human. Instead of taking his hand, she’s venting to this stranger about her life since she fell. He’s mildly confused busy just slowly walks with her back to his post. Where she continues her rant. Front here I’ll leave the story to spot! :-) I hope you enjoyed my little ramble.. I’ll make more longer into this au! It’s always in my brain anyway..

Dopple!tale by : @spotaus or @spotlightstudios

[supermaks]

F1isms aside how are you doing? sounds like it’s been a rough half year, hope you’re hanging in there

🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀 tysm for asking🩷

I mean our fund raiser nearly hit its goal but tbh like it’s so crazy to me that so many people already wanna help us so like even irl I have family and friends who I thought wud come thru and didn’t. Like my aunt literally just called us this week offering COTA tickets and I was like . Can’t u just help pay a few medical bills. Can’t u send my mom some rent money because yk shes about to lose the house and she can’t get a job and we’re gonna be homeless lmfao. And my aunt was actually super offended that I was offended lmfao and now I feel like I shud have told her yes and then made another giveaway for those fucking tickets because fuck her. but whtvr. I think for some reason I just didn’t expect to feel so alone. Yk other people struggling wid their own shit but like. Me and Mrs kat have my mom, who’s can barely afford to feed us and keep us off the streets. Mrs kat parents came out all the way from Marseille to have Xmas wid us and it was nice ((I thought)) and now they refuse her calls and say they will send HER money but only her, under the condition that she dumps me because I’m holding her back wid all my baggage and my chronic pain and fucked up shoulder and addiction. And I’m black so I’m not right for her anyway 😐 I served these people food in my moms house lmfao.

Mrs kat got dreams of her own here tho she wants to finish her studies and pay off student loans like .. and she wants to be wid me. So her parents like cut her off completely and they stopped sending money a long time ago.

This shit is really fucked up and complex Im just trying to tell u , yeah. It’s been fucking rough. 😣😣😣 I do have a ‘job’ now which is something, I do errands for this like INSANE woman who’s prolly gonna get me arrested but she’s paying me weekly and that’s all that matters. My mom says I need to find something wid a contract immediately and that’s why I need the fundraiser money so we don’t completely become homeless while I search for safer options. I also need to go back to rehab and physio asap because I feel like I’m losing my mind and my benefits only afford medical physio from a shitty fucking clinic like once a month and it’s always full. I’m in pain all the time rn. I got duped into this extremely expensive surgery I’m STILL paying for and now it’s like they don’t care that I still need physio to actually getter better.

My cats are ok 🥹 Chica rejected some medicine for some stomach issues she had and had to back to the vet ((more bills 😭)) and it was scary but she’s back super stable and almost 100%. Calypso is SUPER pregnant, due prolly next month and we want her to have the babes wid us because it’s her first litter and she’s an anxious diva but that’s sm WORK and we’re kinda like NOW??? Ok. But she seems safer wid us, comfortable, and gonna be a real good momma. Chica has been incredible wid her too. They really be taking care of each other.

So yh if u still got some spare change u wanna throw our way my p.aypals is: kt.s.mays@gmail.com . U will also register for my bdays ((august 5th)) first anual ‘supermaks gives back’ where I pick a few of u thru p.aypal to send back my much beloved max merch as a thank u . I know this is dumb but idk what else to do. Idk how that’s gonna work either but I’m excited we’ll figure it out. Y’all been here for me twice now . Makes me wanna cry when I think of it too much.

I appreciate all yalls help wid all my heart. Just knowing there’s strangers out there who still want to c us fight to c another day and do better, bro that’s more meaningful to me than words can say.

I am hanging in there. Thanks to u

God bless u 🤍