#people love toxic men and hate toxic women

[elliesgaymachete]

Ok listen i’m just saying if cinder fall had been a male character he would be a fan favorite

[imsailorpluto]

Call It Love (2023), Kang Min-yeong

This one makes me awfully sad. There are lots of things one can label as "wrong" and "immoral". Life isn't all black and white, no matter how hard we try to make it that way. As a woman, I tend to side with other women any chance I get, no matter if it turns out to be a big mistake.

Dong-jin, even if you're played by Kim Young-kwang, I can't let you off the hook, sorry.

Their break up makes me think it was a bit of everyone's fault. Sure, we could just oversimplify it and say they weren't compatible in the first place. We still have no idea what he did, but she cheated anyways, so this is where we should just shut up all together. Well, maybe they were both too young and inexperienced to deal with their parents' burdens. It's best to learn on other people's mistakes, but this time neither of them could escape their own selves.

Dong-jin's mother is one peculiar women nobody would ever want to meet in any kind of circumstance. Her son avoids her best way possible, but she always finds a way back into his life, destroying everything she touches. Min-yeong comes from a disgustingly wealthy family (I mean the woman drives a Maserati, that car scene alone made me weep), it's only natural her life is full of problems as well; her parents never approved of her relationship in the first place. For a girl who seems to be hurried into getting married, is there anything else that's left to expect besides a tragic ending? Dong-jin tried escaping his mother's influence, more or less, but same thing can't be said for Min-yeong. My guess is both were in great pain which they couldn't get rid off due to coming from such different worlds while neither of the two knew how to patch the void in between. Inexperience.

Dong-jin's biggest mistake was hiding his true face from his partner while insisting on keeping the relationship going. He hid his background, his childhood, his wounds, his identity. Is having a meaningful relationship even possible without taking the mask off at some point? Yet that's something he could never do but still, from his perspective it must have seemed as if he's doing fine as a partner. That's not how it works, relationship is almost like a living being, and putting up a wall is always noticeable, even when the other side turns a blind eye.

Certainly, him not letting her in on his painful past has a great affect on all that lead to their break up. While Min-yeong was looking for support in the one she loved the most, she was not getting any reassurance back and she probably blamed herself for him not opening up to her. That's something women usually do. And what do people do once they can't see a way out of a difficult situation? They become (self-)destructive. She could bend over backwards but she was just not the one he would move his emotional blocks for. From what we can see in the series, he didn't really want to discuss their future together and he kept pushing her away, presenting it as if she might be the one to push him away, some day, when she learns the truth about him (if she ever does).

From that perspective, their whole situation smells like trouble. Big, big trouble. She said herself her goal was getting married and having a family. I can't blame her for wanting those things. Is wanting something she subconsciously knows Dong-jin would never offer so wrong? Is loving a person deeply to the point of being irrational and practically dumb so wrong? Ah, but desperate measures are always wrong. Why don't we all collectively just bury this woman alive, why would we understand anything that she went through? It's not like something like that could ever happen in real life to any of us, right?

Honestly, the show presents Dong-jin as if he were an angel and not a man with severe mother/father issues. He's portrayed as a kind hearted protagonist with a high moral sense, who drowns his sorrow in alcohol while lying on the floor for days after Min-yeong's mom sent him the wedding invitation. I can't deal with kdrama mom thing at all now, they're a different kind of evil, I swear.

The audacity of "I won't let you in and I won't marry you, but I won't let you marry anyone else either" is something known for ages. That's probably why her mom sent the invitation in the first place. And all of that together makes me think he didn't treat her like a decent human being. Not because he chose that, but because he doesn't have the capacity for it. Not having the capacity, being somewhat aware of it and insisting on the relationship, because the other person displays so much affection and love, is as equally bad as cheating. That is actually also cheating. A person doesn't have to get involved with anyone else to be a cheater. It's enough to hide their wounds and not be honest about it. That alone makes me think the reason why he pretended not to notice she was out dating someone else hides behind his feeling of utter guilt. Guilt for not being capable of providing her what she needs, to compensate for building up walls and wasting her time all along.

Dating emotionally unavailable person, heck, living with one, is soul draining. It hurts like hell looking at a person and feeling as if you're staring at a blank wall. The pain of having to go through that daily is worse than your partner actually cheating on you once or falling for someone else and breaking up. At least that's how I see it; the pain it puts you through is not even comparable. The reason behind it might be in the fact that for cheating one doesn't need intelligence at all. To lure someone in your life, make them stay and to calculate how much of which part of yourself you'll give in each and every moment, well... In my eyes that's way worse form of betrayal. It takes a lot of brain. That's manipulation at it's finest. There's something very dark and vile about it; it can play with other person's mental health in the most brutal ways, where outcomes may be even fatal. And we have it right there on the screen. Min-yeong became an alcoholic. She let a man with mommy issues and extremely low self-esteem drag her down to the bottom, while he then carried on with his life as the main victim in everyone else's eyes. That's something men who hate their mothers do very often.

Her side was never shown (at least not yet), how much she must have waited for him to change, to open up at least a tiny bit, how much energy and effort she poured into their relationship. How many times she tried to get thru his walls. Sure, she made a huge mistake by contacting his mother first, but I can't blame her. Imagine how desperate she was in that moment; she went behind his back to check his phone and steal his mom's number. Even thinking of doing that is hitting rock bottom yet she went on and did it without being aware of what desperation looks like on her. As any relationship, theirs must have had a great start. Keeping his character in mind, he was most probably an amazing boyfriend at first. Once the honey moon phase ended, first problems emerged. He probably pushed it all under the rug. Min-yeong's mistake was falling a bit too hard and not breaking up with him sooner, probably thinking she could change him. Could be she wanted to prove her parents wrong as well, but for whatever reason, it hurts to watch her scenes and think about her psychological profile.

It's never one sided, that feeling when relationship reaches the breaking point. People don't want to be the bad one, breaking up first. It is a bit pathetic, not ending a relationship and enjoying the victim role saying "I've been dumped" any chance possible. Meanwhile, those same people treat their partner so poorly it's evidently there is no love left there. I'm not trying to use this drama, nor Min-yeong's character to justify cheating. Of course cheating is wrong. What I'm trying to point out is the following. Dong-jin's move - not ending the relationship and choosing to live off of his partner's energy until she turned into a wreck - is also just as wrong, if not worse than what his partner did. She obviously loved him more. What a textbook example; men with severe self-esteem (and what-not) issues pursue gorgeous smart amazing independent girls, only to ruin their psyche, changing them into something, someone unrecognisable operating on survival mode. Sounds a lot like a parasite causing a disease.

Min-yeong's left miserable in the end. She turned into an alcoholic who, even after all the hell she's been through, still thinks she might have a shot with this guy who never even truly accepted her. Oh the brain fog. Oh the twisted perception. All the excuses she must have made for him until she fell into a hole they both dig up. While he just used her for tending to his wounded inner child. She must have been so confused and so lost, how messed up her head must have been when she couldn't even get rid of him. How do you get rid of a parasite? Without an intervention, you don't.

I'm good at writing apology letters for others, so why not writing one for her? So let's wrap this one up. In all honesty, Dong-jin probably took best years of her life while she waited for him to open up. What, they're probably in their late twenties, early thirties now? Imagine yourself living in a conservative society, where certain norms are expected, are even obligatory. I get that his mom made him miserable but she is still his mother. There is no other woman out there who could fill that role. Being in a relationship for god knows how long without introducing your "future wife" to your only parent, who is clearly still around, for whatever ugly reason he should have been open about, is wrong on so many levels. Min-yeong obviously loved him deeply. All she wanted was to marry a guy she loved and start a family, and not wait for him for 10 years to finally make up his mind. He knew they were not compatible, despite all the love. She was blinded, he didn't want to hurt her so he didn't let her go even though he should have. She tried to move on, but couldn't, because she wanted him. She wanted the person she could never have. She was hooked badly.

No satisfied woman would ever cheat, especially if she wants to commit to a man till the end of her life. At this point her actions look like a desperate cry for help, but her example is just another one in a sea full of such cases, no one will care once you're incapable of getting up on your feet; however, everyone will point a finger and be the first to judge and even cheer on as they watch you drown.

[narmothewraith]

Introduction of my blog

My main rule is when interacting with me: just be nice and if you harass people for the content they like?? Just fuck off, this page is safe for the freaks. (I mean look at the warning) As long you're nice and you let me be me, I won't give a fuck who you are. So yeah that's all :)

~ I go by the name; Sam

~ I'm a masc person and while I prefer male pronouns I don't really give a fuck, so you can call me anything.

~ I'm 18 and post/reblog 18+ content now and then, so if you're uncomfortable with 18+ content or are a minor please do not interact with those posts... Thank you <3 Uhhh so basically I'm being horny on main...

⚠️ WARNING: I play DoL (Degrees of Lewdity) and I post/reblog stuff about it but it's a very fucked up porn game, so I will post/reblog dark content on here. I will try to tag accordingly but yeah. In general there will be some reblogs of dark content, so if you don't like that, well this was a warning ⚠️

[sethdomain]

i somethime forhtot hoe sexfist this countray is lol

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Going from a fast food restaurant full of twenty year old guys with ADHD and a boss who swears up an angry storm every time a customer exists, to a kitchen full of older ladies that are somehow all part of the same family and show pictures of their grandkids to anyone with a pulse.

[trans-leek-cookie]

I just saw your tags on the unreliable narrator post and I really want to know what character you’re talking about now

Geto Suguru from JJK. I came for the hot Asian guy with long hair and a cool outfit stayed bc I'm interested in how cults and eugenics hurt ppl irl and also how they're explored in fiction. But between heaven and earth I alone am trying to find a fic that actually treats him being a cult leader as the problem it is and also gets fucking Nanako and Mimiko out of their. Uhhh fuck idk if u know JJK so spoilery ranting under the read more that assumes familiarity (so not like. Explaining specific plot shit bc my brain will explode)

so basically ppl have called out the eugenics shit with like "kill everyone who isn't a sorcerer" and generally they're like yeah that sucks but whatever not important lol. And I've seen like 0 shit actually about how he's a cult leader + how cults are Abusive. And some ppl are like "actually he has a point bc blah blah blah" like okay. If sorcerers were a stand in/comparable to real life marginalized groups. WE DONT NEED MORE "MARGINALIZED EUGENICIST" PLOTS. But even within the story they don't seem marginalized? Like, there are Marginalized Sorcerers, but being a Sorcerer isn't something that's consistently oppressed? The closest thing is either misdirected ableism/sanism ("they see things that aren't there and are assumed to be psychotic" which is its own can of worms) or like accusations of witchcraft which... I guess that's sorcerery based on this universe but irl those were usually used either along with or as cover for other shit (racism, misogyny, land grabs, etc). So hes not necessarily marginalized on that level- tho growing up in a family without other sorcerers mightve caused problems for him that's a LOT different from systemic oppression. And, also? In a lot of cases it seems like sorcerers are relatively privileged with a lot of economic, social and maybe political power? Like the big three families are obv examples bc they're fucking Rich and control the sorcery world so. Y'know. Also it's stated at one point sorcerers receive some like exceptions to the law but aren't allowed to hurt ppl who aren't sorcerers so. Yeag

anyways going more in depth on eugenics- okay real quick terms: negative and positive eugenics. That's not in reference to the quality, "positive" doesn't mean "good" But Rather in reference to wether the action is meant to Reduce "bad genes" or Increase "good genes". And obv negative eugenics includes shit like forced sterilization and murder which I don't want to downplay, but positive eugenics is also coercive and fucked up. For example, forcing ppl to have children they don't want. Which isn't Discussed in the series, but the fact is sorcerers a SMALL minority of the population, and they're already having trouble with curses, so. Theoretically sorcerers would be coerced to have more children to bring the population numbers up. Personally I think that's Not Something Suguru Believes In (I'll get into that but main thing is his eugenics isn't an actual strategy but rather lashing out and ego) but like. There's abuse on both sides of the equation no matter what. Eugenics isn't fucking redeemable.

Now onto the cult shit. It's not super expanded on besides needing money and curses to like. Kill ppl or whatever. But my interpretation of Suguru is that he started a cult, and believes in eugenics, because his ego was damaged. Like the trauma impacted him and influenced his actions ofc bc trauma Does That but also I straight up think his ego was bruised and he wants revenge.

Like first of all, the wider context- he's a kid who is alienated from his parents and probably most of the ppl he interacted with due to his abilities, which is understandably damaging esp at a young age.

He is then scouted and labeled as a special grade- he is one of three in Japan and I believe the world, if I'm not misremembering. He is on par with Gojo Satoru (category wise) who. Literally "Gojo Satoru's birth changed the world" like that's a NUTS ego boost to get

Anyway Gojo called the two of them "the strongest" literally pairing them up and positioning them as equals so like. Whoo boy. Also special grade sorcerer is defined as "a sorcerer who could single-handedly take down a nation" which okay! Labeling children as essentially weapons of mass destruction. Normal behavior

Then Toji happens and this random fucking guy beats you up. He kills your best friend and the girl you were escorting. But he doesn't kill you- because of your cursed technique being risky to deal with, but also. Obvious subtext of "you aren't important enough to kill"

Then your friend comes back from the fucking dead. Kills the man who tried to kill him. Discovers entirely me abilities and becomes even more powerful. And you are stagnating, with a technique you fucking hate. Your entire power is the power of Other Things.

So like. Understandly, thought maybe not justifiably, your ego is fucked.

So you start creating a new dichotomy: sorcerers and everyone else. If everyone else is lesser, you still have worth because you're Better than them by virtue of existing.

And then you discover 2 children being abused for the thing you have a victim complex over (<- this is also it's own thing I'll talk about) and you murder a bunch of ppl about it (okay this is a little questionable of My Opinions maybe but I could. Not forgive but understand the mass murder bc there's a lot of shit building up and clearly if 2 young girls being badly abused in a small village that implies the majority of people were either okay with it or unwilling to try and help at all. Anyway it's still Bad but like. Understandble mental breakdown trauma kinda bad for me? Also bc most ppl irl recognize murder as being Bad but are Weirdly Forgiving of bigotry yknow)

Anyway you take over the cult that was doing some other shit and my personal interpretation of this is also an ego thing. Bc lots of cult leaders do it for the money, but a lot of them also do it bc they like the feeling of controlling ppl. And there's essentially 2 levels of the cult- everyday people and the people he considers Family (which includes Mimiko and Nanako, the 2 children from the paragraph above).

On the "everyday people" level, there's a feeling of being a revered religious leader, knowing something they don't (curses exist), and the satisfaction of taking advantage of the people you don't like.

On the Family level, you position yourself as a savior and as The Only One Brave Enough To Do What Must Be Done (eugenics genocide) so even if you aren't the strongest you're still Special.

So that's my main analysis of why he became a cult leader, and now I'm gonna make more comments about why I think his shit is "Ego" rather than a (fucked up) desire to actually help ppl

If you wanted to help sorcerers survive: THE CLANS ARE A MASSIVE FUCKING PROBLEM. They hoard techniques tools and knowledge and the Zen'in clan literally cast out Toji who could've been a fuckin BEAST at dealing with curses. The clans reliance of tradition also generally hinders sorcerers ability to grow and improve in ways that aren't Traditional

When he dies the cult falls apart (which: good) but also the members have different ideals like some of them wanna keep doing eugenics, some of them just wanted Suguru to be powerful, and two of them were basically his adopted kids. If you actually had good intentions: CREATE A PLAN FOR WHEN YOU DIE SO YOUR FOLLOWERS CAN ACTUALLY CARRY OUT YOUR WILL AND HELP PEOPLE INSTEAD OF LETTING THEM INFIGHT

And idk if this is totally Ego or starting to move into a separate thing so I just decided to split it up: even when he was "righteous" his beliefs kinda Sucked

Like "the strong must protect the weak". There are inherent sort of... values being placed there, because weak is negative, not neutral. It's relatively minor, but I think it's important to note with how his beliefs evolve.

It's not like "we need to protect the people who can't protect themselves" it's really reductive. There's weak people and strong people and basically Noblisse Oblige but for strength or whatever which isn't really actual kindness or equality but rather pretty much. Pity.

Also he sorts jujutsu sorcerers into "strong" and everyone else into "weak" for the most part so that's... great worldview my guy. Definitely not going to just worsen your alienation from other ppl

so when he goes to "why should the strong protect the weak?" He jumps to "the strong don't owe anything to the weak, and actually the weak should be Punished For Being Weak" instead of. Just doing something else. Just get a fucking job, my guy

Anyway his plan is just garbage top to bottom total mess morally and logistically and he's a traumatized teen who grew into an abuser and like. The trauma influenced that but there were always fucking problems so it isn't "oh he got hurt and is evil :(" it's "he has some worrying beliefs and his trauma is likely making his emotions and ability to reason unstable, and then he finds an excuse to turn that instability into Violence" like. He's not necessarily abusive bc he's mentally ill or traumatized marginalized he's abusive bc he got to a point in his life where he could justify it to himself and it felt Good

And I just remembered this part: for the characters who interact with him I do enjoy that they still like and love him, even though he fucking sucks, because that's very human. You'll love imperfect people, you'll love horrible ppl who hurt you and/or others, and that isn't irredeemable it's just Human because being a Human and Connecting With Humans is complicated like that

I even like it when they excuse his bad behavior! Bc that's a realistic character flaw, to value the person u consider your friend over the people they hurt! It's not ethical, but it's natural and interesting to explore in fiction.

THE PROBLEM. IS WHEN THE AUTHORS DO NOT TREAT OR ACKNOWLEDGE IT AS A PROBLEM.

Like... listen. Love a relationship where one character sucks and the other character forgives them for the ppl they hurt and just wants their loved one back. The problem is when the writers are like "aww this is so sweet/romantic/beautiful" WHATEVER. Because it's not??

Someone defending their fucking abusive partner/friend/family member, especially when they aren't victims themselves, isn't fucking sweet it's scary, either for them or others!!!! And I want either to see the characters grapple with the way they excuse their loved ones' abuses and how that reflects on them and their morals, or, if the characters don't do that, for the author to acknowledge it as A Flaw!!!! I'd that too much to fucking ask

Especially with cult abuse, I don't want to say it's necessarily treated worse than any other type of abuse, but it feels really hard to find things related to fictional cults that actually acknowledge the Real Life Damage and Abuse cults do instead of having the cult be 1. Faceless evil 2. A joke 3. Fetishized/romanticized. And like all forms of abuse are similarly distorted in media + fiction, but I feel like ive almost never seen cult abuse portrayed respectfully/accurately, especially in fan works

Anyways for the wild TL;DR I think Geto Suguru's personality is comparable to an anti-sjw trans guy who is getting scarily close to Actual Fascist beliefs and is hurting all the people around him and his ex mutuals are like "he's not that bad" when he is That Bad and I'm so fucking mad about what happened to Nanako and Mimiko. If I think about their canon treatment I get so upset I start to have a headache

[lisaquestions]

Stay the fuck away from trans women

everything in this post is TMRA garbage, not worth even arguing with.

People like this have no business speaking to or about us, let alone insisting that we should be in community with them. This is just tortured rationalization to treat us like garbage and reify patriarchal hierarchy by placing men in authority and power over women.

Trans women, you do not have to let toxic dipshits like this into your lives nor do you have to listen to them. They do not know what they're talking about, they only want to define our place as subordinate to them even as they move through the world as actual men. Be free of this garbage, be yourselves, don't let this shit drag you down.

people like this love to accuse us of terf rhetoric, but that entire post is literally terf rhetoric

also could someone who is not one of these unhinged woman-hating MRAs explain how people got to "white trans women are more male than other trans women" like they realize they're just trying to litigate excuses to say that shit and this isn't real analysis or theory right? Especially given how often trans women of color are ~suddenly white~ when people are mad at them?

[venus111]

Astrology observations

🦋 Virgo rising women attract lesbians,Pisces in the 7H can indicate this it makes things blurry same as Aquarius in 7H

🦋 water signs hate talking on the phone especially if it’s small talk

🦋 Pisces sun like to be chased I’ve noticed they are quick to block someone and disappear for good

🦋 Capricorn men are bachelors some don’t mind the loneliness

🦋 Leo Lilith have traumatic childhood can attract toxic men

🦋 Aries and Sagittarius placements are known for their lack of filter

🦋 Pluto in 6th house if undeveloped will only contact you if they want something from you they can use people

🦋 Capricorn placements age gracefully

🦋 Venus in the 6th house have elf like ears

🦋 Taurus placements are either gym obsessed or overweight

🦋 Taurus,Scorpio and Aquarius placements have unique nose shapes

🦋 people born on the 22nd always face difficulties in their lives they can end up being completely shut from the world several times. A lot of failures and rejections and love failures, family relationship breaks you name it. It leads such people to a lane that normal people won't be able to sustain. Yes they are a tough cookie. celebrities who have this Amber heard, Selena Gomez and Hailey bieber

🦋 Lilith in 2nd house/Taurus Sometimes it can seem like people are so quick to touch you, have sex with you or get access to what you have that you can feel like they don’t really see you for who you are.

🦋 I have Chiron in Scorpio 2° I find myself breaking things and also things will stop working when I use them phones,cars,laptops, tv remotes,kitchen utensils

🦋 Leo placements love spoiling their partners and family with gifts

🦋 Pluto in the 2nd house love saving up and are stingy with their money

🦋Jupiter in the 2nd house are the recipients of good fortune

🦋Gemini placements own many pets

🦋 Libra women love to dye their hair blonde

🦋 All the members of the royal family have Leo placements and degrees

[thekeeperof-thefandoms]

My girlfriend requested this

Hazbin men trying the period simulator. Somewhat of a follow up to my period post so this is based on the reader having severe period pain due to PCOS/ENDO

Lucifer

The man is sweating before you even attach the simulator. He knows he fucked up. He only agreed to this because he loves you a lot.

He handles the first 3 levels ok. You tell him very few women experience that little pain and that usually 4-6 is the average.

Those levels make him tense. He's uncomfortable, but still pretty able to work and do normal things. 5 has him pausing to do deep breaths every now and then. (If this is the canon timeline where he birthed Charlie he compares it to bad kicks).

6-8 he's pretty much doubled over. If you tell him that's the level you experience, he will cry. Literally begs forgiveness since again, period and labor pain is technically his fault. He is so sorry. If he didn't have issues with his Dad before he does now because this is fucked up. God's fucked up for doing this.

He doesn't make it to 10, he's crying by level 9. This is labor levels of pain. He gets why all you do is sleep. Treats your period like a sacred ritual after that. Preps for weeks. He goes full Bible, sheltering you for the duration of it so you can have peace and quiet. Please never hook him up to this again.

If you wear it at anything from an 8-10 and tell him "It's close, but I've hurt worse" he's gonna sob and then try and fight his Old Man again. He'll settle for offering to have your bits removed for you.

Vox

Once again this man hates admitting he was wrong. And yeah he knows your periods are really bad, especially now he's witnessed it. But it's still a huge knowledge gap for him and he doesn’t really take the time to think about it.

He handles 1-5 well. He's mildly uncomfortable by 5, but thinks that if this is the average experience, then it's not such a big deal. Tell him the statistics on how many people with periods actually experience 6-8 because that's actually the majority, and he's just confused. How is the average pain level not the most common?

6-8 has him gritting his teeth and glitching, but he refuses to stop and keeps trying to work. Is starting to wonder how you went so long working with this level of pain without him noticing.

He makes it to 10, but by then, he's unable to move, clutching his abdomen and sparking and glitching. Tells you it feels like his entire insides are being squeezed. The fact that he can feel it in his groin. He's kind of afraid of period sex with you after that because of how much he felt it. And you said it's caused cramps from your ribs to your knees. He's like... genuinely scared of your period and pain tolerance.

He's going to snuggle the fuck out of you afterwards and apologize for not appreciating how much you still do for him when you're not feeling good. How he didn't see how hurt you were. He does a lot of research after that and not only does he spoil you by buying whatever you need for your periods and giving you time off, he looks into treatment options. Even if that means chopping the useless fucking things out. Sinners can't have kids anyway so who needs ovaries and a uterus?

He's more convinced you should just be rid of the damn things when you wear it and 8-10 is "Yeah, this is close, but it doesn't really cover how much of my body hurts".

Valentino

Is only doing this because he was dared to by Velvette. Or if this an au where he's trying to be a less toxic person. But really I think it's also to prove that you're all being dramatic. It's a perfectly normal body function and his employees are just trying to get out of work.

He gets all the way to 6 before he starts to realize he may have fucked up. Especially when it's explained that this is what most people experience.

By 10 he's gritting his teeth, chain smoking, clawing at things. He refuses to give in, but he can count on one hand the number of things in his entire life and death as a pimp and a whore that he's experienced that come close to this level of pain.

No one told him his dick was gonna hurt. Sitting hurts. Breathing hurts. He doesn't even try to eat. He won't ever admit to being wrong, but he does behave more leniently with his actors when they're on their periods.

If you put it on (and lets say he actually cares about you) and setting 8-10 is "Yeah, this an average day for my cramps. My bad days are like..5 or 6 levels worse" it's gonna rearrange his brain a little. He might be a little afraid of you and some of the other actors with periods because your pain tolerances are so high. It threatens his ability to control you and them. But on the other hand, that's kinda hot???

Alastor

Has never once doubted that people who experience periods undergo serious struggle and has nothing but respect for women (and trans people he just associates it with women more because of the time period and his mama) who work through it.

He is actually the one who heard about the simulator through Rosie and asks you to show him your experience. Just to better understand you. He knows you're the type to try and function through the pain (probably because society ingrained into you that your pain doesn't matter).

Initially, he wants to skip the lower levels and just have you set it to your pain level. You tell him that's a bad idea, and to be honest, you're not sure if this thing goes that high. He asks you to check and you set it to the highest setting and say, "It's pretty close. It's been worse, but this is a rough idea," he's a little frustrated but still tries it.

You agree to set it to 4 and tell him 4-6 is what most people report feeling. He acknowledges it, registers it as unpleasant, but otherwise is fully capable.

7-9 has his ears flat, his smile is more a snarl. This is uncomfortable. Not what he considers painful but certainly irritating. It makes sitting, stretching, and eating feel much more difficult.

10. There's static visble around him. His teeth grind. Actually painful. Not the worst pain he's experienced, but he hates it. He hates the way he feels it in his back and hips as he walks. He hates the way taking deep breaths (which for someone as dramatic as he is and with the transatlantic accent, breathing technique and posture is important) stings. He hates the way it causes his stomach to cramp and churn. He hates the ache in his thighs and groin that make sitting feel stiff and ackward. He can only picture how blood loss would make this worse. Tired, losing nutrients, the headaches, the increased moodiness. It's no wonder you sleep, so much, but he wonders how the Hell you sleep like this? He's snappy and short tempered because of the pain (and again he gets why you would be if you weren't sleeping so much).

How does this affect how he treats you?

Not much. He still expects you to know your body and your limits. He would never dare to presume otherwise. He still helps prepare whatever you need for your time of the month and still meal plans for you, though he perhaps finds ways to ensure you get all the iron and vitamins you need without cooking steak and other big, heavy meals, since he now understands how bad your stomach hurts.

The only really noticeable change is how much more protective of you he is. Your time of the month hits, and Alastor hates being more than a few moments from you. He growls, pins his ears, and his antlers grow when people get too close to you. He's more prone to letting you snuggle with him when you want, trying to comfort you.

Angel Dust

Another who volunteered. His girl besties insist he doesn't have to do this, he's got the pass. He still wants to do it though, for solidarity.

He also starts on 4 and handles it well. He handles all of the levels pretty well, even 10. By 7 it's obvious he's sore, maybe a bit more withdrawn, exhausted, trying not to move too much or eat too much. Just trying to find a comfortable way to exist. The sad problem is, Angel already has to do this after rough nights at Val's.

He's used to sitting being uncomfortable and aches in his groin and thighs, cramps in his stomach from muscles clenching constantly. 10 is the only level where he's visibly ill, hunched over, lower arms curled around his midsection protectively.

He and the girlies all curl up together and nap and chat and snack on easy to digest junk food and granola bars. He's the first one to say "I bet it's even worse for you gals, but I tried".

He gets it. He's one of the girls. Honestly, kind of becomes a favorite when the ladies have period problems. (If you're dating any of the others and Angel is openly your favorite after this it is gonna cause a lot of dramatic pouting, posturing, and tantrum throwing.)

Husk

I'm going full balls to the wall on Veteran Husk. This man has seen some shit and dealt with his fair share of pain. Like Angel he takes it the best, with very little outward reaction. He's used to stiffness and nausea. The pain in his crotch is a little off putting, but it could be worse.

He's more cautious how he moves, rests more, occasionally a cramp causes his ears to pin back or a small hiss. Overall he takes it like a champ.

Offers you endless amounts of supportive words for dealing with this as well as you do, for days on end. Also is deeply sorry you even have to put up with this shit. Offers all sorts of tips on how to do stretches that help with easing cramps and stiffness without pulling something. Tips of foods/protein drinks to keep on hand to make sure you're maximizing how much nutrition you get. Man's a whole ass survival guide.

He only offers advice if you ask, though. He's not mansplaining how to handle your own body. He genuinely wants to help you, and that's the best way he knows how.

When you're on your period and just want something soft and warm he doesn't even bitch about it, he just settles on top of you and purrs, offers a massage, maybe offers a sly grin and a "no man left behind" joke as he helps you through these dark times.

BONUS:

ADAM

Would only do this if you challenged him, he has to prove his masculinity. He is definitely nervous as fuck though because he's seen yours. You and Lute already forced him to sit through a whole PowerPoint on women's anatomy and shit. He remembers how shitty he was to Eve, even if hers were in comparison, not that bad, just scary and new.

You forcing him to learn about and acknowledge female health is making him scared of pussy. This isn't gonna help.

3 and 4 make him whiney. He's uncomfortable. His groin feels weird. This sucks. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS ISN'T EVEN THE AVERAGE?!"

By 5-7 he's actually on his knees, curled over his stomach. He tells you getting stabbed hurt less. This is making him re-evaluate his entire view on women (again he knows about trans people, but because of personal history equates periods to women. Wouldn't hate if a trans person had a period, it would just take his brain a second to process). He whines that you and Lute shouldn't be more badass than him.

"I thought men were supposed to be tougher and stronger. This pain tolerance horseshit is a lie. You guys suck."

He insists on going to 10 because quitting is for losers. He may actually throw up at 10 though. Every time the stupid simulators sends out a pulse and his stomach clenches, he groans. He's in the featal position, there are tears. One hand clenches his stomach the other is cupped around his groin. He's apologizing so much and he doesn't even remember what he's apologizing for. At one point its just "I'm sorry...oh fuck this...sorry about...ugh just...just men?! I guess. Fucking shit ass. Men suck. Women are...fucking great. Aces. You do this shit every month? For like 5 days....what the fuck. What the fuck what the fuck."

You feel a little bad, but Lute is definitely filming this. Afterwards, he tells you you're a badass and any person shit talking people for bitching about period pain (Not that a lot of Winners do, but ya know, obviously they let some questionable people into Heaven if Adam and Lute got by) he's gonna beat the shit out of them. Like "Do you even fucking know, bitch? They're literally so much fucking better than you. Absolute queens. You try doing literally anything when it feels like your dick is falling off and your insides are trying to claw outside your body!"

[justinspoliticalcorner]

John Pavlovitz at The Beautiful Mess:

Yesterday, Vice President Kamala Harris announced that Minnesota Governor Tim Walz would be her running mate in the coming presidential campaign.

The decision was met with effusive praise from both Blue voters, as well as a disparate group of politicians and commentators. Walz’ effortless warmth, his heart-on-sleeve demeanor, and his undeniable joy for life, which have been apparent for a long time in his home state—have suddenly become a national story. In a matter of hours, millions of people fell in love with the Governor, sharing videos of he and his daughter on thrill rides at the State Fair, and photos of him being joyfully embraced by a group of school children and cheerfully holding a tiny, sleeping piglet. And in the wake of the announcement and of his and Kamala' Harris’ electrifying appearance in Philadelphia at their first rally, the “Christian” MAGA Right rolled out a telling reply that they surely imagined was a real zinger: They created the hashtag #TamponTimmy. Really. That’s where they went. That’s all they got. Not only does this desperate response underscore the reality that Republican voters have nothing left but sophomoric name-calling in an effort to emulate their emotionally-stunted orange messiah in the absence of substantive critique, but it reveals how hateful toward women and how threatened by non-toxic masculinity they are.

MAGAs don’t see how much they expose themselves by using a female medical product as a slur, the way it reveals their complete contempt for women and their agendas toward them. They are so intimidated by a man this confident in who he is and so endowed with natural humility, that they have to attack these things as if they’re some sort of character flaws. Emotional maturity is a red flag for them.

[...] They are fully fed up with Trump and his surrogate’s contrived John Wayne dudebro American tough guy cosplay, and they are ready to embrace a better kind of manhood: one that doesn’t need to prove how tough it is, doesn’t have to be the center of attention, and most of all, is not concerned about showing its deep humanity because it revels in it. Tens of million of boys and young men of this nation have been irreparably harmed by the sexist dehumanization of Trump and the MAGA movement, which have been reinforced by Dark Ages theology, culture war politics, inherited/internalized misogyny, and good ol’ fashioned fragile masculinity. This nation is ready to embrace a masculinity embodied in Tim Walz and Doug Emhoff: one that does no harm, one that gladly defers to a strong, capable, talented woman, and one that makes all of us better.

John Pavlovitz nails it. The masculinity of Tim Walz is what’s needed for America, instead of the kind of masculinity the likes of Donald Trump, Andrew Tate, and Elon Musk push.

[starstruckmiraclekitty]

141 + König Jealousy Headcannons

Based on a request from anon- I suck and somehow posted my drafted one yet again☹️

Warnings: sexual references, mild angst

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Simon Ghost Riley-

When He Gets Jealous -

While Simon knows he is an attractive man, he still thinks that you can do much better than him

That being said, when you're around your close friends, and seem genuinely happy by their presence, Simon can't help the pit that forms in his stomach

He will get quiet and distant whenever he feels jealous. It's not a common emotion for him, and he doesn't know how to handle it

May honestly go to Johnny for advice about it

It'll take him a while to open up to you at first about his jealousy.

When he does finally come to terms with his jealousy....SCARY...DOG...PRIVELAGE

When You Get Jealous -

Let's be honest, this man is beautiful, so he constantly will have men and women vying for his attention

Simon isn't one for small talk with strangers though, so he often brushes them off politely, much to your amusement

That's not to say however, that you don't still get jealous when a fairly attractive person goes and chats him up

When he notices you get jealous, he'll make it a point to introduce you to the person who's flirting with him

Simon's not the overly affectionate type, but he would certainly make an exception if you were upset enough. He wants you to know he's yours until the end of time.

Doesn't even complain when you jump him the minute you guys get home

König-

When He Gets Jealous -

Like Simon, König isn't very vocal about his jealousy, and he will get fairly quiet

He's still fairly insecure with himself, so when he sees someone he feels is more attractive than he is, he can't help but feel self-conscious

He will subconsciously go above and beyond for you- pulling out your chair, bringing you flowers, opening the car door for you- more than he already does

He doesn't fully understand why you are with him, but he will do whatever he can to keep you

Please reassure this poor man. He loves you so much and doesn't want to lose you

When You Get Jealous -

Poor baby doesn't ever intentionally make you jealous

He tries to be nice to any person who approaches him, and it indirectly makes you jealous

He also doesn't realize when people are flirting with him, he always just thinks they're being nice

Literally will feel SO bad if you're jealous, and will apologize profusely for making you feel bad

Gets adorably flustered if you mark him up. Doesn't know what to do with himself

Say the word, and he will RAVISH you in bed to make you feel better

John Price-

When He Gets Jealous-

This man SCREAMS possessive (not in a toxic way). You are his and his alone

Will stare daggers at anyone who stares at you too long. He will make it known you're his.

Is definitely the type to waltz up to the person you're chatting with, and interrupt the two of you to introduce himself

If the person gets handsy with you? God help that person. Price would kill for you.

9/10 though, the minute his gruff, demanding voice comes out, it scares any possible suitor away from you

Will absolutely take you home and make SURE you know who you belong to ;)

When You Get Jealous-

When you get jealous, John gets pretty cocky about it

Depending on his mood, he may or may not feed into the flirting (just to see you get riled up)

Likes when you come over and make it known he's yours. He finds it cute when you get all fired up

Also finds it cute if you get all pouty about it, he will tease you quite a bit about it

Certainly won't complain if you mark him up once you get home. He'll wear those hickeys with pride

Kyle Gaz Garrick-

When He Gets Jealous-

Kyle doesn't really get jealous, and he hates the feeling of when he is. He never wants you to feel like he doesn't trust you

He may get a bit defensive if a man or woman is trying to shoot their shot with you, but he's confident enough in you and your relationship that he doesn't worry

If he does happen to get jealous, he will definitely get clingy. He'll come up and wrap his arm around you, or press a kiss to your cheek, making your relationship very apparent to the person who's talking to you

When You Get Jealous-

Kyle is very aware if he's being flirted with, or if someone's making a pass at him, and he's always quick to shut it down

Will feel really bad if you do get jealous, and will cuddle you for hours when you get home

He's the type to constantly reassure you of his affections for you. He never wants you to feel like he'd want anyone else but you

He would hesitantly admit that he gets slightly turned on by your jealousy

Johnny Soap MacTavish-

When He Gets Jealous-

Johnny is fairly confident in his good looks, and he trusts you completely, so he doesn't often get jealous

When he does get jealous, it's oftentimes because he's drunk, and you'll honestly have to hold him back so he doesn't hurt someone (or himself)

Will absolutely make a scene. He will make the entire vicinity of wherever you are aware that you're his partner

If he gets jealous when he's not drunk, he trusts you enough to let you handle it on your own, but will 100% step in like the macho man he is to get the person away from you

May or may not cover you head to toe with hickies...the worst has to know you're his

When You Get Jealous-

Johnny finds it hilarious when you get jealous, and will ABSOLUTELY tease you about it

If the two of you get drunk enough, you both like to see who can make the other get the most jealous

When either of you get jealous, it usually ends up resulting in hours between the sheets (not that either of you would complain)

If you get upset about it, though, he'll feel horrible and will smother you with affection once you get home

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[lubrumalis]

ghost headcanons! (realistic)

tw: nsfw, spoilers, dead dove do not eat

a lot of these are based off of my personal understanding of him

part 2 —> character analysis of ghost

general:

didn’t go back to manchester after his family died, too many foul memories—a lot of friends will probably know him as a murderer (comic reference, ghost was accused of killing his family in the newspaper)

has a fit body. a lot of people like to hc him as big and bulky, i think otherwise! its actually a huge disadvantage to be bulky in size as a soldier (logistics while fighting yk). most SAS soldiers are trained for endurance and fitness, i think he has a moreso lean body

hes not cold and ruthless, wouldn’t say hes a big softie either.

VERYYYY punctual. always on time

will not abuse or rape anyone. this guys been through atrocities, he would never do it to someone else

won’t hire a prostitute, ever.

honestly, hes just another dude in the military. he loves dad jokes and bourbon😭

ghost doesn’t think hes mean or tries to be, he simply is intimidating because of his size and way of talking

he likes watching soccer in his free time

gets internally offended if someone thinks hes from london (anywhere but Manchester)

very dark humoured. tell him any dark joke and he wouldn’t care

loves tea

listens to older british bands, like the smiths

cannot understand modern slang at all. what does ‘iykyk’ and ‘rizzler’ mean???

texts like a typical millennial. uses ‘😂’ and ‘😜’ unironically. types with proper grammar and spelling with punctuation too, maybe an occasional LOL

also unironically likes posts about trust issues and being a sigma male. he doesn’t actually think hes one, he just relates to those quotes that are like: “being alone is better than with fakes” 😭😭😭😭

ghost probably hates other men more than misandrists 😕 i think its bc hes always fighting other men and dealing with the cruel things theyve done, so ghost subconsciously feels more on guard with men he doesnt know

has insomnia

doesn’t cry. ghost doesn’t remember the last time he cried.

isn’t rich rich, but has a ton of savings. he doesn’t have a family or spend a lot. so the money piles up.

relationship hcs:

first off, i dont think he’d realistically get into one anyway LMAO

s/o would have to the chasing, i dont think ghost is the kind to actively pursue someone

he has charisma, doesn’t feel like using it

hes very against the idea at first—his family got murdered because he was in the military, you think hes gonna let it happen again?

probably will not like someone working with him as a soldier

i think itd go two ways: a) you are a civilian who aggressively pursues the poor guy and he gives in, b) you work as a military nurse and gradually get to know him, c) you are a longtime close friend of his before he was in the military

i cant see him being fwb with anyone, only one night stands

hes not a toxic partner or super lovey dovey

ghost doesn’t entertain multiple women at once

itd most likely end up in a breakup where he fears for your safety:(((

BUT lets ignore that

tbh, i think he would probably be with someone very empathetic and kind to others. he doesn’t like people overly energetic, too soft, or someone that annoys him

persons gotta be independent and good with long distance

simon doesn’t care about age gaps, but probably wants someone at least in their late twenties

had a hard time opening up, eventually told you everything once he trusts you

another reason why i think he wants someone empathetic is because he has severe trust issues😃😃

last thing he’d care about is looks for long term relationships

the type of guy to disappear for 6 months and reappear to be like “remember im your husband???”🫡

doesn’t let you tell your friends about him—No hes not being uncommitted or toxic, but hes simply being cautious after what happened to his family

you can’t show anyone photos of him, his name, his occupation, NOTHHINGGG

so you fake a name for your bf who your friends think you’re lying about

definitely does not let you post on social media about him either.

installs security in your home, teaches you self defense, and gives you weapons. this guy can be paranoid

will never hit you or lay a hand on you

ghost genuinely thinks you saved him—his life was bleak and empty before you came in. subconsciously thinks of you as a savior

he buys you gifts, does chores for you, he really likes you :(

ghost actively tries to make his voice sound softer and friendlier when hes talking to you

doesnt understand playing mind games, things like the silent treatment or “im ok” when ur not ok thing. just tell him how you feel

doesn’t tell his team about your existence. you and his job are always going to be separate.

avoids talking about what he does in the military. ghost has killed and injured many and he doesn’t want you to see that side of him.

scary dog privileges for SURE

[luveline]

i see ur thinking abt the marauders and i was just thinking abt them too!! i just saw a thread on twt abt how much men hate their girlfriends but wont break up with them (😖😖) and couldn't stop thinking abt how james would be so BAFFLED reading it!! would you be able to write something for that? its perfectly fine if not!! ily <33

I luv you! I'm not sure what thread you mean but I made a guess, sorry if it's not right ♡ fem, 1k

modern au. cw mention of toxic/hurtful relationships

"What is that?" James asks, pushing the sheets back as he climbs in beside you. His bowl of cereal is heaping, upwards of ten weetabix doused in milk, sugar, raspberries, blueberries, and a generous squeeze of honey.

"What?" you ask, showing him your phone screen. 

James leans over you to scroll back up. "Men who hate their girlfriends?" 

"Oh, it's like, people posting their screenshots, I think." You click on the tweet he'd been pointing at and show him the replies underneath. "It's just boys who act like they don't love their partners but won't break up with them either, there's loads on there." 

"What?" he asks, holding his bowl in one hand. "Can I?" You give him your phone happily, watching as he reads through some of the examples, screenshots from different websites and forums. "'Recently had to tell a friend's bird that he was calling her all sorts of names. I'm loyal to my friends, but you could hear the hatred in his voice sometimes. She left him two days later and he was surprised, for some reason.'"

James' eyebrows pinch. He continues, "'Am I in the wrong for asking my husband to stay awake with me during my early morning labour? He keeps bringing it up.'" James shows you your phone screen. "Like, he's mad she didn't let him sleep through the birth of their child?" 

"You know, there was a video on there a few weeks ago where a girl had put together a compilation of her boyfriend play fighting with her, and each video got nastier and nastier." You reach for the spoon to his bowl to start chopping up the weetabix the way he likes. "He was kicking her legs from under her and she was laughing it off. Once or twice, I'd think it was funny, but he wasn't even laughing himself." 

"Why the fuck?" James asks. 

"I don't know. Can I have a raspberry?" 

"They're in there for you to steal…" James watches you chew. You try not to pay too much attention to his staring, plopping your phone down in the sheets between your legs. "Why are these boys getting with women they don't like?" 

"I don't know, Jamie," you tell him honestly, wading through his bowl for another raspberry. "I think they get comfortable." 

He accepts the spoon back from you and you slouch down the fabric headboard together. James eats his weetabix slowly, the TV sending a light blue light into your otherwise dark room. "It's a bit late for supper," you murmur. "Were you hungry?" 

James puts his bowl on the nightstand. Coils of curls brush your forehead as he leans down, one big hand on the back of your neck and the other stretched across the shoulder furthest away from him, holding you in place as he kisses the top of your head. It's a weighty kiss, full of love. "I love you. Don't ever let anyone treat you like those boys on your phone, yeah?" 

You hum lightly. "That's what boys are like." 

"I know. I'm just begging you not to let people do that to you." He rubs your shoulder roughly, a massaging that hurts in the good way. "You know, if you can. I get that it's not their choice." 

"Yeah. I think people want so badly to be loved that they'll take the pretend kind. I was lucky to find you before you found someone else. You always make me happy." 

"This is what I mean," he whines, resting his cheek on your forehead. You sigh happily at his touch, more than ready for a night of his arms around you, a heavy leg thrown over your hips to lock you in. "You think you're lucky because of those dickheads." 

"No, it doesn't have anything to do with them. Just you." 

James sits up to turn your face to his. "Love you," he says, kissing you quickly. 

"Love you too. Don't stress about the phone, babe, you're not the audience they're looking for." 

James hears your teasing tone toward the end, poking your side. "What's that for?" 

"Nothing, just, you tried to follow me into the bathroom last night even when I told you I wasn't showering. If you're that eager to sit with me while I pee, I doubt you'll be the kind of guy who ends up on that forum." 

"It wasn't about the peeing, stop trying to shame me," he grumbles, again pulling you in for a hug, "it was separation anxiety. I miss you."

"I get why these women end up like that, though," you say quietly. "I get why they stay. If you started shoving me for a laugh or whatever, I'd think about this, because you love me. Does that make sense? I'm so happy right now that I wouldn't want to believe that you didn't love me anymore." 

"I know. It's fucking sad. I can't believe they do shit like that, it's pure selfishness." James settles back in his pillow. "I wouldn't ever do that shit to you. I know everyone says that, but I have to say it anyway." 

"I know, Jamie. Don't worry. I'm not worried about it, only talking." 

You offer him your hand. James takes it, rubs the back of it, brings it to his lips for a barely felt kiss. "Is there anything happy on that app?" he asks. 

"Uh, I saw a video of a baby girl who only stops crying when her cat comes to check on her. Or a pregnancy reveal where the boyfriend starts crying and begging her to get married." 

James rests his face on your shoulder, snuffling into your skin contentedly, "Ah, so my future. Put it on, angel." 

[wis-art]

The worst period of my life was when I was a self hating teenager in denial about being transgender. I grew up in a deeply abusive household and my father expected me to be his manly son and I tried to conform despite it driving me insane, I fell down many nasty rabbitholes because of my insecurities rooted in deep hatred of my body and deep hatred of what I should be, I have always felt uneasy looking at men in cartoons and movies thinking to myself how much I don't want to become that, always envying the girls and always dreaming about waking up as a girl. This all lead me online because I felt so isolated from the world and I couldn't relate to anybody. Of course an unmedicated self hating teenager, with grand delusions about being god's little special soldier, seeking ANY validation is bound to fall into some horrible places, i am one of the victims of the alt right pipeline, and it did drive me into suicidal spirals many times over how much I hated myself for being transgender. Eventually I snapped out of it and grew out of it but the taste in my mouth of ever associating myself with that kind of community is really disgusting and never seems to wash off from my tongue, which I suppose is good since I never want to be back there mentally. I despise the right wingers, seeing and experiencing their beliefs first hand, it's all just driven by hate and insecurity, the only reason why it's so popular is because these people prey on lack of knowledge and insecurity of any kind, offering easy solutions and quick fixes, putting an easy target to direct your hate towards just to deflect the hate away from yourself. It is not a valid or real solution or even political ideology, it's a grift and a worldview sold to people who know their future is uncertain, it's harnessing the societal instability and crisis for political and financial gain, and I was a sucker for it in my teenage years for which I apologize. Nowadays I am unapologetically a leftist, with flaws and gaps in knowledge, like any other human on this earth but fundamentally different and changed from when I was a kid, and I am proud of myself and I am proud to be the bad transgender bitch that I am. It took so much effort, medicine, therapy, help from my family, help from my friends for me to realize that I was wrong and that I need to change. I did not do it alone. And I'm glad I did it, and I'm happy to ve fortunate enough to receive help and support despite being a toxic unpleasant person to be around. All so I can just be Wis in peace a weird transgender woman on the internet, drawing trans women who despise the fascists and nazis. It's also why I so deeply believe in people changing and why I am so adamantly against harassing people for their mistakes for years, it just doesn't help, all it does is makes one ashamed and all shame does is drive one further into the abyss of self hatred. As corny as it sounds love has saved me and it is love and patience that helps people change

[transfaguette]

People are so WEIRD about men. Like we can all conceptualize the shittiest misogynistic grifter cishet man. Andrew Tate types. And men like that? I hate them, I recoil in disgust and anger. But that’s just one type of person…that is perhaps representative of the kind of men our society can foster, but that’s it. The same people who allegedly care about dismantling toxic masculinity STILL treat men and boys like mindless faceless soldiers, who have no inner worlds or emotions. “Men DON’T care about therapy,” they say, as if that’s just a individual conclusion every boy and man came to independently because they are men, and not the result of that same exact apathy…like this scenario of women having to sit down with shitty misogynists and convince them to get therapy is missing the point. Because men are people!! People and children and teenagers you can talk to and people I know you love and cherish in your life….so why are we pretending this isn’t the case. Why are we always dancing around this!!!

[hadesoftheladies]

actually, I DID have gender dysphoria as a teenage girl without being exposed to anything about it on the internet, on top of "racial dysphoria" and body dysmorphia

there were points I DID want to kill myself because i wasn't, or bleach my skin or change my body, i would have done anything to be a white boy at one point

which is both sad and funny to me because i remember two of my then good friends explain being enby and transgender to me and me being like "that doesn't make any sense" and it's because of trans-discourse we eventually broke up. the closest i ever got to accepting trans-ideology was transmedicalism with weak support for "queer" culture. i did not understand pronouns, but i understood dysphoria. but i did not understand how one could be a man or woman without the sex characteristics.

how did i heal?

one, i left church. that was one of the places i was most scrutinized for my physical body. two, i distanced from my parents, especially my mom. who often made my ocd and body-image worse (not because she was mean, but because she was always fretting about "decency"). three, i focused on bettering my personal space. writing, reading, watching my comfort shows, getting the focus off me. four, i started eating better, and my body became less burdensome. i stopped getting horrible period pain. five, i surrounded myself with self-confident women and stopped trying to resurrect toxic friendships with girls and boys (especially boys). started eliminating each toxic friend and focusing my efforts on healthier relationships. six, i'd started educating myself on my own history, watching and listening to more black and African people. even when i didn't enjoy what they made or resonate with it, i found i appreciated the experience and could allow myself to hate or love whatever i found.

by the time i discovered radical feminism, this was like, the final step for me: consuming women-centric literature and media. this was HUGE. i'd see paintings and photography of women in all shapes, colors and sizes. i'd listen to master musicians, read women philosophers, anthropologists, etc. this started mending a lot of what caused initial disquiet when it came to my dysphoria or dysmorphia.

basically, i took myself out of bad environments (especially those which force you to scrutinize every detail about yourself, like social media, i took long breaks from that), drew boundaries with people i couldn't get rid of, learned about myself (ocd, dyscalculia, anxiety, female biology) so that i developed understanding and could empathize, stopped centering men and white people.

now, while there's still a hint or trace of dysmorphia and dysphoria, it doesn't plague my life. it's like the occasional itch. more of a mild temptation to go down a dark hole than an actual threat. and i've learned how to handle those.

i learned the root of things. not just my history, but the root of how society worked and how it affected me. and i'm still learning, and my life is still improving.

so yeah, girls and women going through this is normal and common. anyone who is used to who they are being shameful is more at risk (like gnc lgb kids), but you can recover. usually better if you get out of the places that are making you sick.