#r-word

[spacefrog1984]

You really don't need to defend Sai calling people the r-word

You can acknowledge its shitty (and being like 'well its ~technically~ not a slur'- also shitty)

Its 2024 not 2007

I know I don't need to defend Sai here because I don't think she's done anything wrong. Yes, the language is crass, but it's not like she's your coworker or your teacher or someone else who needs to be mindful of others' feelings in the workplace. She's on the internet speaking her min and calling idiotic people retarded.

"Retarded" is just as much of a slur as "idot", "moron", and "imbecile". There were all once used clinically to describe similar types of mental handicaps but have long since been abandoned by the medical community. These days, these words are used to insult people of with normal mental faculties who are acting stupidly. Why "retarded" is being treated differently in recent years is a mystery to me and many others. It sound like a groupthink issue.

I personally don't call people "retarded" in public settings because I genuinely don't want to hurt a bystander's feelings if they find the word offensive. I'll keep my use of the word to private conversations; I might call an idea or an action "retarded" but I don't call individual people "retards" in public and usually not in private either. But that's my choice; Sai does things differently, and I respect her for not bowing to pressure from self-righteous people thinking they're making a positive difference in the world. You don't need to agree with someone's choices even if you're a fan of that person; if you don't want to hear her say it, then don't follow her. She's not your boss or coworker, you don't need to interact with her or anything she says if you don't want.

And you're free to complain about her language too. I respect that you have a difference of opinion here. I'm not dismissing your opinion as a genuine way to feel about this word, it's just an opinion that I don't agree with.

𓆏

[chicagomoonlight]

I don't think it's straight up bigotry. I really don't. I think there's nuance and I think there are people SO EXHAUSTED by all the world's problems that they're no longer policing their language to please anyone so colloquial use is coming back to the forefront.

Here's my train of thought:

We need another word for "dumb as fuck" that has the same potency of "were you dropped on your head as a child?" Tom Segura has a bit about this; about how "we never said it THAT way. We never were like, 'Look, there goes one!'" There's a generational interpretation, usually late gen x-ers and elder millennials, and a small subset WITHIN THEM who recognize the slur if it's INTENDED as a slur but still felt okay enough with the colloquial use of "that's r-worded" or "am I being r-worded about this?" to mean "dumber than stupid" but also "maybe my brain isn't working right regarding this situation." And they stopped using it for a long time because other people threw a fit about it. And now they're older and no longer care about what other people think so it's coming back because it encapsulates "dumb as fuck" without cursing and also implies maybe something in the brain isn't functioning quite right. And the INTENT isn't "HEY, FUCK YOU, MENTALLY DISABLED HUMAN" nor is it even being directed at someone who is. I think that "de-slur-ify"s it in their minds.

Very similar to how artists are STILL sometimes described as having a g*psy lifestyle. No one is saying "FUCK THE ROMANI PEOPLE" when they describe someone that way, but there isn't another term for "forced to be nomadic, peddling my wares or my craft, and people judge the lifestyle so we find and protect our own every time we go to the next town/gig."

I personally don't use it because it's not worth the upset to me but I GET why people I know are dropping it now and then (also, I don't know that it ever "went away" in Boston). It conveys a certain attitude with a certain amount of punch that is hard to otherwise achieve. But I'm also one of those "INTENT MATTERS" people because I think everything is and can be nuanced. If someone says "You're such a fucking r-word" or "look at that r-word over there" YEAH, THAT'S A FUCKING SLUR, don't talk like that. But if someone says, "the DMV is making me go to the clerk's office to get a new birth certificate because mine is too creased for their machine-reader and my passport expires in 10 days so they can't accept that either to renew my license? That's r-worded." I get it. I feel that. I understand that feeling. I understand the intent. No one is trying to attack the disabled in their commentary on the DMV.

So... If language evolves... And people still think that 2nd scenario is offensive... Then I think we need a new word. Or intent needs to matter and it's understood that it's not always being used to attack a vulnerable group. Either way.

Unless I've had a VERY different experience and people really ARE using it as a way to talk about the disabled, in which case, ignore everything, FUCK THEM - THAT'S BULLSHIT.

The thing about the r slur is that people who are using it again are indeed using it as a slur. This isn't a word that is being reclaimed. This is a word that is once again being used 100% as a slur. You're being a bigot if you're using it against others. Straight up. There isn't another argument to be made. Knock it tf off.

[abyssaldyke]

It seems like the older I get, the more irrationally angry casual censorship makes me. And it isn't just the "unalive" "grape" alleged filter-dodging vernacular, but the way normal words will be peppered with asterisks, or screenshots will have words like "gay" "hell" "fuck" etc either partially or entirely blurred. Who is this helping? What is the purpose of it, except to reinforce shame and elevate a flimsy perception of purity and safety, however those things manifest. It's so tiresome and I'm sick of it.

[boasamishipper]

helena eagan who grew up wanting for nothing but at the same time truly wanting nothing until she watched her innie receive the affection she spent her whole life trying to earn. helena eagan who stepped into her innie's life because she wanted to know what it felt like to be loved with no strings attached. helena eagan who tried so hard to be the woman her innie is - who crawled through a tunnel full of goat shit to help mark find his outie's wife, and tried to console irving before his trip to o&d, and laughed openly and freely with the refiners around the campfire on a snowy night - but in the end just couldn't pull it off. helly was never cruel. sometimes the poison drips through.

[yellowfoot-06]

Ableist Cowboy: What in retardation?

[pirateprincessjess]

I feel the need to periodically remind people that Idiocracy is a eugenics movie.

One of the things that eugenicists believe is that it is bad for society when the “wrong people” breed.

The entire premise of the movie is that “stupid people” kept having kids while “smart people” didn’t have kids, and it ruined society because stupid genes propagated while smart genes died out. This is eugenics propaganda.

I know people will read this and their response will be “actually it’s satire” but the movie isn’t satirizing eugenics. It’s satirizing anti-intellectualism, and consumerism, and it proposes eugenics as a solution.

When eugenics was first conceived, it was used as a way to justify inequality. The idea was that people who held privilege were able to do so because they were smarter and genetically superior to lazy and stupid people who don’t have privilege. Obviously this is bad and wrong, but it is also the core lesson of Idiocracy.

The movie literally ends with the main character becoming president and having “the smartest children in the world.” Because he and his wife have smarter genes than everyone else. The proposed solution for the things that Idiocracy is satirizing is for the smart people to have children that can be in charge of the world.

I know it’s fun to use this movie to dunk on anti-intellectualism and the MAGA movement, but we need to stop. When you quote and reference this movie you are spreading eugenics propaganda.

[mournfulroses]

A. R. Ammons, from a poem titled "Shot Glass," featured in The New Yorker

[morganbritton132]

17 year old, CEO Tim Drake canceling a press conference and then putting out a statement like, “Sorry for canceling last min, Alfred said that he was going to run my laptop through the dishwasher if I didn’t clean my room. I think he’d do it :/. Also, wasn’t really in the mood. Cya -Tim.”

[ashoss]

happy death day, jason :3

[hinamie]

places one last offering upon the itfs make it out alive altar bc if they die /i'll/ kill them

[beejwatch]

Alan Alda as Hawkeye Pierce in season 3 of MASH

[spacefrog1984]

https://www.specialolympics.org/stories/impact/why-the-r-word-is-the-r-slur

This is a source discussing the r word, and how it has been used as a slur (specifically coming up in posts about disabled people) and it was still the accepted medical term quite recently (2010). I don't think this make sai a horrible person but dismissing because some else is worse is how communities can become toxic to disabled people.

(for the record I dislike sai for her treatment of it/it's users being kinda transphobic but I doubt have screenshots from that rn)

I don't dismiss criticisms of Sai because she's a saint in comparison to Lily Orchard. Check out some of Sai's blogs (main: @saiscribbles, drama-side-blog: @purpledemonlilyposting) - read for yourself to see if she's as toxic to disabled people as you've heard. As far as I know, she has never directed the word "retarded" at a person of reduced mental faculties. I understand that the very use of the word can be offensive to some, but I think context matters here when determining if someone is "toxic" or the community that they foster is "toxic" to any group.

Also, keep in mind that just because a medical term is in the DSM doesn't mean that it's still being used by clinicians. "Mentally retarded" may have only officially lost its clinical status in the last two decades, but it's been out of use for much longer in the US and elsewhere. Perhaps that's what's behind the hang-ups people have here: "idot", "moron", and "imbecile" have been out of use longer than "retarded", their association with mentally handicapped people have fallen out of public awareness long ago, but "retarded" is still on peoples' minds. I think the longer we go about insisting "retarded" is a slur, the longer it will take for the word to lose any connection to the mentally handicapped and become just another insult to be lodged against a person acting like an idot.

I have my own issues with "it/its" being used as a preferred pronoun, and while yes, I agree with Sai that it's kind of silly and a cry for attention, I've also recently become aware of why "it" irked me so much - it has to do with the appropriation of the pain of actual dehumanized people like slaves and genocide victims. I'm not going to be taking to the streets any time soon demanding people stop using "it/its" for there pronouns, but I don't respect the use of these pronouns because (A) they're kinda silly, and more importantly (B) they're insensitive. However, note that none of my reasoning is based on transphobia, nor is Sai's reasons for finding "it" to be a cry for attention based on transphobia. People can have differences of opinion and not fall into a category of toxic and harmful people based solely on a single issue. I'm a fervent supporter of transgender, nonbinary, and gender-nonconforming people, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with was some of these or other people consider an appropriate pronoun for a human being.

[lucabyte]

something about marine biology and benefits

bonus:

[lovesick0cupid]

"universal trans experience!" and its only applicable to american gender conforming binary leaning or strictly they/them frog nonbinary stereotypes

can we pls start accepting that no trans experience is the same im so tired

[glittergroovy]

(if the full rent is $2000/month but you split that with a roommate, vote $1000. This is just about what you pay)

[pencildragons]

all those posts that are like 'wilson is just as off his fucking rocker as house' are RIGHT and they need to say it LOUDER because why was wilson's solution to pull house out of a suspected grief spiral to pretend to play a mind game while pretending to secretly playing a different mind game, which in turn was another mind game designed to engage and distract his boybestfriend by giving him a little puzzle . and then it WORKED . thats not a normal thing to do