#so i feel like my idiocy was justified

[oglegoggle]

Just like… the first fight was when we were sitting in the tub together a couple days after his cat slashed my literal eyeball, and I told him outright that the cat is not allowed in my home again. His immediate response was to say “So you’re dumping me?” and I wasn’t at all trying to dump him I was trying to assert boundaries around the trauma I just endured and he left.

The second fight was after a few months of living apart but still dating when we were sitting in the tub together and he read my comments on a Tumblr post about ADHD folks being allergic to taking responsibility for their own actions. He asks me what sparked the comment and I told him that I found one of my most beloved dishes broken, hidden in the living room in a pile of his garbage he just left in my fuckin house and wouldn’t clean up and his reaction was to say he doesn’t remember breaking and hiding my dish (I don’t remember therefore it never happened legit being one of the biggest emotional triggers in my life and he knew this) He asked why I didn’t tell him about it if I’ve been feeling hurt by his behavior and I told him that I feel like confronting him about things when I feel hurt doesn’t change the nature of our relationship.

By that point he had scheduled us exactly one consult for couples counseling (after several months of asking over and over again for cc) and afterwards decided it would be a waste of time and money since I would be leaving anyway so I had just kinda accepted that we’re not trying to make the relationship work anymore we’re enjoying fuckin so why bother with arguing over emotional shit? He again left. Two days later I texted him apologizing for saying mean things about him on my blog, and he never did respond. Two days after that I realized I shouldn’t be apologizing for being hurt by his behavior and I’ve in fact done a hell of a lot of apologizing for being hurt by his behavior, a lot of taking financial responsibility for his fuckups, parenting him because he’s incapable of doing literally anything in the way of chores, and just enduring the stress of his filth and the seizures his dog gave me and the new heap of PTSD his cat gave me and I realized that I’m just going to be ground into dust by his selfishness and apathy towards the impact his actions have on others if I continue. I blocked him on everything.

I am certainly aware that I’m not always kind and gentle, and I do want to genuinely apologize for and fix my mistakes, espesh in regards to people I care about. But the truth of the matter is that I put work into fixing my mistakes and flaws. He did not. I was constantly walking on eggshells with him emotionally because every time I would go “Hey, this thing you do hurts me” the two plausible responses were “I’ve got (insert mental illness here) so tI’m not capable of doing better.” or “This is the end of us!” And well…. Yeah. That was the end of us. I would certainly have appreciated it if I could’ve maintained a friendship with him, but he’s honestly a real drain of a person and I’m better off without him. I still have that longing urge to text him and talk but I know that he’s bad for me. He’s said it himself, he’s not capable of doing better. And I deserve better.

[luveline]

𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 | 𝐣𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫

two | chapter list

Finding out you're a princess isn't half as intimidating as suddenly acquiring a full-time bodyguard. Especially when that bodyguard is disarmingly handsome, charming, and can't seem to stop flirting with you.

bodyguard!james, fem!reader, shy!reader, princess diaries au (sort of), all characters in their 20s or older, star-crossed lovers/ forbidden romance james isn't flirty this chapter i lied but he will be <3

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Sirius Black smells like winter. The deep and fruity fragrance of cranberries, pomegranate, maybe cinnamon. You aren't certain, and if he weren't currently an inch from your face, you'd ask him what it is. 

"You poor thing," he murmurs, dabbing very, very gently against the bruised skin of your cheek.

"It's not–" You hiss at sudden pressure. He immediately recedes. "It's not so bad." 

"I've half a mind to rag him around and take up the mantle myself." 

"I'd love to see that," Remus says.  

"I'd look good in the uniform, right?" 

James doesn't look happy at their joking but he's been nothing less than a grovelling puppy since last night, and he breaks his silence to say, "You don't have to wear any make-up if it's going to hurt." 

"Uh, yes she does. Imagine the headlines otherwise: Lost Princess Bruised Under the Imbecilic Watch of New Bodyguard," Sirius announces, sharing a not-so-private smile with Remus across the coffee table. 

"It doesn't hurt," you say to James. 

You're lying. Being smacked in the face with a door isn't just embarrassing, it really fucking hurts. James' biceps aren't for show, that's for sure. He'd swung open the door and you, having tripped seconds beforehand over the cord of your lamp, had been at the perfect height for it to bounce off the highest point of your cheek. 

"Princess," he says now, as he'd said last night, "I'm so sorry." 

You think of his hands under your arms pulling you up into a standing position, and the way he'd tilted your head back. The barking order he'd given Frank to grab something to use as an ice pack, and the warmth of the pad of his thumb as it stroked the soft line of your jaw. 

"It was a freak accident." You smile, careful not to push up your cheeks lest you invite another round of shooting pains. "Please don't feel bad. It's my fault for being up in the first place, I– I couldn't sleep." 

"If you want anything for it, let me know," Remus says. 

"He's got, like, his own personal pain pharmacy," Sirius says. "You should take him up on it. I beg him everytime we fly for some of the strong stuff and he always says no, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity." 

"Let's not start on the co-codamols," James says. 

"I have ibuprofen," Remus placates. 

"I don't need anything, I promise." 

Some ibuprofen would be awesome but you really don't want James to feel guilty. You want to forget it even happened, embarrassed by both your idiocy and your tears. 

Getting hit in the face by a metal door handle hurts. Your reaction had been justified, but crying all over your handsome bodyguards nice hands hadn't been something you'd pictured doing. Not 12 hours after meeting him.

"You want me to do your lips?" Sirius asks. 

"How do you mean?" 

Sirius pulls a metal palette of lip colours out of his small make up bag and shows them to you. He circles two with a disposable brush. "These would suit you. I wasn't sure about your complexion. Now I know, I'll get you more options when we're back in Genovia." 

"Oh, um…" You shake your head at him apologetically. "I don't know. You should do what you think is best." 

He puts the palette away. "You don't need anything you're unsure of. You don't need any makeup at all, my love, it only enhances what's already there." 

"Ten minutes," James says. "Princess, are you sure this is everything you want to take?" 

He taps your suitcase with the side of his shoe. You nod. 

"You can bring whatever you want. All of your things, if you like." He gestures to your bedroom. "Though we can get you anything you need, and we will, you're welcome to pack everything." 

"In a day, you'll know I'm not your princess. Less stuff to carry," you say. 

"You're so sure," Remus says. 

He speaks quietly but not timidly, laid back in your chair with an air of relaxation you wish you could master. He has a small mass market paperback tucked into one pocket of his jacket, the yellowed pages peeking over the hem, and his hand stuffed into the other. His pose doesn't speak of any arrogance. He looks happy to be here, and it puts you at ease. 

"Do I look like a princess?" you ask. You don't mean to put anyone on the spot —you aren't fishing for compliments— so you steamroll your own question. "I just find it strange. Surely I'd know. I would've known before, I mean." 

"Like a princess beacon?" Sirius asks. 

"No, but… I don't know. I think I'd feel it." 

Remus straightens a touch, grinning. "You look like him. The Prince. You have the same nose." 

Remus stands up before you can ask him to explain. James offers to take his bag and he shrugs away from his big hand with an annoyed huff. 

To your surprise, James only smiles, cooing after him, "You know you love me, Moons." 

"Well," Sirius says, zipping his bag closed and clasping his hands on top of it. "You can always have your things sent for once we're home." 

Home for them. 

Truthfully, deep down, you want to be a princess. Something in you is singing, is ringing, a string plucked, a tuner reverberating. Finally, something is happening. Your life could be more than mistakes. 

You're not used to having people around and this entire process has been hard. Getting hit in the face had sucked. But, to have company? This single hour has been one of the best you've had in a really long time. Sirius is sweeter than you'd thought, sarcastic but kind-handed, and Remus' dry humour has caught you off guard enough to laugh aloud multiple times. Even James' grovelling niceties have been shamefully enjoyable. You can't remember the last time you had someone around who wanted to comfort you.

And that's exactly why you're afraid to admit what seems true. You can't be the Princess, because if you are, you get to have this for a little while longer, and that would be too good to be true. 

Much, much too good. 

"Alright, let's go. Sirius, you have the keys?" 

Sirius swings his bag into James’ arms. “Am I driving?”

“What a stupid question.”

Another member of James’ security team meets you at your front door to help carry the bags downstairs and into the back of the SUV. James won’t allow you to help and getting inside while they’re still packing the boot feels spoiled, so you stand at the corner and feel too many eyes on you. James stands beside you, one hand hovering behind your shoulders to shield you, ridiculously, from the hedge behind, the other held aloft in level with his mouth, fingers curled around a small radio you’ve seen clipped to his shoulder. He’s enunciating clear, short instructions. He doesn’t sound as severe as you’d pictured someone in his occupation would sound. 

“What’s traffic like?” he asks. The answer buzzes down the line, inaudible to you but obviously understood by James. “Alright, brilliant. We should be on schedule, then. Is the third team on call?”

You can make the next answer out. “Yep, they’re waiting. You want them at the front?”

“Please. I want everyone we have, ideally.”

“Isn’t that overkill?” Sirius shouts from the passenger seat of the car, bent over the handbrake to be heard. “All three teams? That’s twelve men. None of my sources hint at any leaks.”

“I’m being over cautious.” James smiles at you, so suddenly you smile back on instinct. “Security on call get paid either way. Might as well make them work for it.”

He ushers you into the back seat, a cushy leather bench fit for three people. It’s rented, but Sirius is quick to pop a section behind his chair for you to show you the drinks fridge. 

“Oh,” you breathe, legs lit and cooled by the light and the chilled air, “cool.”

“You’ll want to drink one before James assesses that they’re poisoned.”

You wince back. “Are they poisoned?”

“Probably not, my love.”

Sirius is a mixture of flirtatious and genuine that you can’t wrap your head around. He’s awfully handsome, too, which makes it worse: he’s tanned, his curls shine, and he has the most perfect Roman nose you’ve ever seen. He’s almost as handsome as James. 

“Let me be very clear,” he says gently, turned in his seat to face you, “I’m not an intelligence agent. I don’t know nearly as much as darling Jamie about security, but I have a lot of friends in high places and, as far as I’m aware, nobody outside of the British or Genovian government knows what we’re doing here. And nobody has reason to hurt you just yet.” He grins. “It’s James’ job to be paranoid, but that’s all it is.” 

You waver, and his cheerful smile fades. 

He lowers his voice, tone sympathetic. “I can always try one first if you’re worried.”

The driver’s door opens and James climbs in. “Try what?” he asks. He moves through a routine quickly of safety checks like a learning driver would. He rolls up the open window and turns in his seat, gaze flitting between you and Sirius suspiciously. “Everything okay?”

“I think the Princess is a little anxious about leaving the country,” Sirius says. 

“Yeah?” James asks, eyes back to the windshield. He turns the key, and the car warms to life with a low roar. 

“A little.” You nudge the fridge closed with your foot. 

“What was that?” James asks. “Is that a fridge? Do me a favour, don’t drink any of that. I'll get you whatever you want at the airport.”

“She can’t have a bottle of water from the fancy jeep but airport drinks are fine?” Sirius laughs. 

“Spike one fridge’s worth or the entire supply chain?” James asks. 

“What if this assassin is inefficient?”

“Assassin?” you ask. 

James glares at Sirius. "There are no assassins, Princess. He's being ridiculous." He looks to you with a smile. "You have everything?" 

Your expression, a sickly grimace, has him giving pause. All fake smiles and dramatics fall away, and in its place is the genuineness you'd been met with last night. 

"Hypothetically," he says, "there are assassins. In reality, there absolutely are not. You're not in any danger, alright? Sirius is the master of badly timed jokes." 

"Okay," you say meekly. 

James nods and you buckle in, sitting back in the comfiest car seat you've ever sat in and turning your face to the window. You look up at your flat building, and as the car starts to move, it shrinks. You drive further and further away, until you turn a corner, and your life is out of view. 

—

James is worried about you. As an acquaintance, he's starting to think you're a worrying person. There isn't a whole lot of spark behind your eyes — you rival Remus for number of tired smiles. 

He wonders why you hadn't packed any of your art supplies. Your room is teeming with them. Even if you're correct and you aren't the Genovian princess after all, there's still a day or more before they can actually confirm that, and factoring in travel time, you won't be home for at least a week. A week without your sketchbooks and paints and pencils. 

As your bodyguard, as a bodyguard, James has always taken concern in his charge's overall health, mental and physical. You don't seem ill, but you do seem unhappy. 

"Are you afraid of flying?" he asks, hoping that will explain your distance. 

He stands less than half a foot from you. He'll allow you some more space just as soon as you're not in an airport. 

"I'm not sure," you say. 

Another peculiarity, you're a pathological liar. 

Okay, that's unfair. You aren't pathological — James is an excellent judge of character, as his job requires, and he's gotten good at profiling a person's motivations. Your motivation is to become the smallest version of yourself that you can be. Any possible imposition is set aside, such as your refusal of painkillers when your cheek can't not hurt. You refuse to inconvenience others. 

"Is there something I can do? To help you feel better?" 

You smile awkwardly. "Is that your job?" you ask, voice lilting upward with self-consciousness. 

"Kind of. You know, as soon as your paternity test is recognised, you could ask for just about anything. An assistant, as many assistants and attendants as you want. Your security will most certainly increase, especially when the Palace makes a statement." 

He notes your widening eyes and backtracks. "It's not really my job, but I wouldn't mind. If you think of anything, let me know." 

You hide your hands in the pockets of your hoodie. You're dressed as he advised, comfortably and nondescript. 

"Do you need anything from me?" you ask. 

He hides his surprise, eyes doing another lap of the semi-private waiting room he's ushered you into. He takes in business men, officials, and diplomats for the tenth time in half an hour. 

"I don't need anything from you, Princess. Thank you." 

"I don't want to make your job any harder than it is." 

"You haven't." 

"That's not true," you murmur, bruised cheek  toward the floor and away from view. 

"That was my fault," James says. "Not yours." 

He can feel the heat of your tears running down his index finger. 

"That was my mistake," he reaffirms. 

You don't answer, but James knows it isn't an agreeable silence. Which is fine, he isn't trying to dominate your opinion, would never assume he had the right to police what you're feeling. He wants to reassure you more than he strictly should. 

This might be harder than I thought, he thinks. 

"The flight is near enough three hours. You're sure you don't want anything to take with you? If you're worried about dietary restrictions, there's a salad bar in the Mastercard lounge. I'm sure we can get someone to make you something up." 

"I'm fine… Will you be hungry?" 

He laughs. "You really don't understand the employee employer dynamic, do you?" he asks, not unkindly. "You don't have to worry about me." 

He says it sweetly, careful to ensure you understand. He isn't telling you off. He's teasing you. 

He knows he's done a good job when you lift your head. 

"I don't think you can talk about employee employer dynamics," you say, eyes flitting downward to your cheek's bruise. 

He chuckles, eyebrows jumping up. "Oh, nice! That was a quick one. We'll make a Genovian of you yet, they're all sarcastic." 

"They? You aren't Genovian?" 

"Do I look Genovian?" he asks, gesturing to his face. You splutter. "I'm messing with you. No, I'm not originally from Genovia, but my heart is hers." 

"You've always lived there?" 

"Since I was two." 

Your expression dims. It takes James a second to connect the dots. 

"There are plenty of people living in Genovia who aren't native. Remus is Welsh, can you tell? His accent hasn't quite survived it." 

"You've met before? You all seem familiar." 

"We went to the same boarding school. Well, we actually shared a room. We-" He feels heat crest at his unprofessional phrasing. "We're best mates." 

"And you all get to be together," you say softly. 

"Yeah, we do. We're lucky. Before this, Remus was working as a royal tutor for the young elites, and Sirius was trying to micromanage Julianna. That's your cousin." 

"The Princess' cousin," you correct. 

"You brought us back together," he says. "You'll have to forgive me for hoping you are who they say you are." 

"Lily never really explained, how I- I mean, why they think it's me." 

"Well," he says, stepping closer to you still, and lowering his voice, "my assumption is that, because the Prince's passing was a freak accident, they hadn't really planned for any other successors yet."

"Well, what were they going to do? He'd pass on eventually." 

"I believe there were hopes he'd marry a Duchess." 

"And have a legitimate child." 

"Yes. You are, to the majority, a secret. The Prince would have been seventeen at the time of your conception, which is a royal scandal if I've ever heard one." 

"Seventeen?" you ask. 

"Lily didn't tell you any of this?" 

"Honestly, uh, she might have. I wasn't-" You clear your throat mildly. "Wasn't really listening? I had a pretty bad migraine at the time, and I was tired, you know?" 

"You were overwhelmed at finding out you're apprincess." 

"That I might be a princess." 

"Sure. When they told me I might be Prince of Italy, I had the same reaction." 

You wrinkle your nose at him, the most forceful thing you've done in his presence. He laughs a storm, only tamping it down when he remembers he's a  professional. 

Soon, the boys return from their airport traipsing. Remus makes a quiet comment on James' happy smile, and he pretends to zip his lips closed when they both spot Sirius' curious glances. James moves your entourage to a small aircraft, not private but almost, and you board into first class seats, two per each side of the aisle and partitioned by a sheet of frosted plexi-glass. 

You and James sit together. 

He doesn't subject you to conversation. He's technically working, and so while he relaxes into his seat and stretches out his tired legs, he doesn't cut vigilance. 

You look around in awe for some time. Eyes widened just slightly, lips parted, you sit up and sneak glances at everything you can. James knocks on the partition gently. 

"You want the fan? The heater?" 

"The fan," you say, and he supposes you do look a bit warm at the collar. "Please." 

He doesn't bother saying of course, or no worries, or no problem. He's a problem solver. If you're going to be under his watch, he's going to make it as easy on you as he can. That means letting you be thankful without shrugging it off. 

Your eyes close quickly. Your eyelashes flutter imperceptibly in the overhead fans slow breeze, and your lips part as you fall into sleep. Last night's disruption had been hard on you no doubt. He stands quietly and eases sideways down the aisle to check on Remus and Sirius inconspicuously. 

"Anything for me to read?" he asks Remus. 

Remus knows exactly what James is up to. If he appreciates or abhors the extra attention is anyone's guess, until he digs through the bag at his feet and pulls out one of his Russian philosophy novels with a smirk. "This or the newspaper." 

James takes the worn paperback with a wry look of defeat and reaches over and across to Sirius head of curls, tugging one cruelly. 

Sirius looks up, but is only irritable when he notices that it had been James, and not his seatmate. 

"What?" Sirius demands. 

"Do you need anything?" 

"No. Quit mothering. And maybe get some rest?" 

"I can't."

"You most certainly can. Swap out with Frank, or Mickey or someone." 

James swaps out with Mickey. Mickelson, please keep an eye on the entryway. Yes  boss. He returns, finding you aren't as asleep as he'd thought. You look at him through lashes. You've gone soft, in little regard for your appearance, and he's glad for it. Watching you is like watching a spring stretched tall, and now you've finally snapped into yourself and deflated. 

"You alright?" he murmurs. 

You nod, and he sits, and when he doesn't get up you fall asleep again, like you'd been waiting for him to get back. You sleep for hours, through turbulence, Sirius' roaring laughter, Remus' answering chuckles, and the flight attendant who scolds them. James wishes he could do the same, reading a mind-numbing forty pages of Russian literature densely translated and sipping on a glass of coke, the ache of an oncoming pressure headache pinching behind his eyes. 

The hubbub doesn't wake you. The plane lands, you sleep on. 

James whispers your name, quiet, speaking louder when you fail to rouse. Finally, he gives in and squeezes your shoulder. Heat radiates through the thick fabric of your hoodie. You hair is frizzy where it's rubbed against the seat behind you. 

You wake with a raspy cough. "James?" 

"We're here, Princess, in Genovia." 

"That was," —you yawn, turning to hide your face so he can't see— "fast." 

You look like you might fall asleep again. His heart does this awful little flip. He ignores it.

"It was hours. You've slept the whole time– A good thing, huh?" He bends down until you're face to face, an amicable gap between you as he squints at your bruise. He's close enough to share your breath. "Bruise is getting worse. Remus will give you painkillers, and I'm gonna get you an ice pack as soon as we're off the plane." 

He squeezes your shoulder again. "Up. Come on." 

You nod and rub your eyes, stretching in your seat. He averts his gaze and stands as tall as he can, shoulders hunched to avoid clipping his head. Remus has made no efforts to move yet and Sirius is in the aisle, pulling their bags into his arms. 

"Are you alright, Moony?" James asks. 

Remus has gone ashen. 

"He has a migraine." 

"Can you see okay?" James asks. 

Remus gets blurry, occluded vision when he gets these sudden migraines. He winces, hand over his eyes, and says, "Not really. Can I have your sunglasses?" 

"Yeah," James says, holding in the, of course you can, I'd genuinely die for you, that he wants to add. 

He slides his rucksack off of his shoulder and takes his sunglasses from the front pocket. He taps them into Remus' hand. 

"You'll have to touch up the Princess' bruise for me," Sirius says. 

James coughs. "What?" 

"It's easy–" 

"I'll take Remus," James says. 

"You can both go do your jobs, I'll be fine," Remus mutters, flinching at an invisible, biting pain. 

"No," they both deny. 

Remus doubles over. 

"All you have to do is stipple it," Sirius whispers fervently.

"Sirius, I don't know what stippling is." 

"Dots of makeup. She knows what shade we chose. Here, take my bag. There's a clean brush." 

Sirius smiles at James. Remus hasn't always let them take care of him. His disabilities have often made him the subject of disdain, pity, and misguided attention he has never, ever wanted, and he'd mistaken their friendship for lots of things at first. Nowadays, he accepts the help that he needs, help that his friend's are happy to give, and disregards their smothering overkill otherwise. That being said, Remus has always found it easier to accept help from Sirius than James. They all know it and none of them bother saying why that is aloud. 

Flying nearly but not quite privately means they can get off the plane whenever they're ready (within reason), and so James ushers you back into your seat where you'd been standing tentatively in the aisle and presents the little make up bag. He kneels in front of you. 

"I'll get the painkillers," he says, remembering his earlier promise, "Sirius is preoccupied, so. You're stuck with me on touch ups." 

"Is it bad?" 

"No. Does it feel bad?" 

Your slow response is telling. "No," you lie, "it's not that bad." You point at one of the colours through the clear case. "I think it was that one." 

"Thank you," he says, murmurs, opening the case. There's a brush tucked inside, and he picks it up clumsily. 

"Does he have a mirror?" you ask. "I can do it myself, if you want."

"If he does, he didn't give it to me. I promise not to mess you up too badly, Princess." 

James presses the brush into your chosen colour and pats. The concealer is harder than he'd thought it would be, tough under the brush. It all looks silly in his hands. 

"Lean your head back for me," he says softly. 

You tip your chin up. Your eyes close as he begins. 

He's too careful. The colour doesn't want to transfer. "Sorry," he murmurs, applying pressure. You wince but say nothing to stop him. "Tell me if it hurts too much." 

"It's only a bruise."

"You're allowed to be hurt. And you should be more angry with me." 

"It was an accident." 

"It was my mistake." He watches the bruise disappear under concealer, but the colour doesn't quite match your skin. He tries his best to blend out the edges. "A professional mistake, which means you're more than allowed to be annoyed." 

"I'm starting to think you want me to be mad," you say. You're trying not to move, and so each word is half a whisper. 

"I do. I want you to be furious. It's ten times harder to keep someone safe when they have no self-preservation." 

He gives up on the brush and uses his pinky, his cleanest finger, to smudge out the blocky colour he's left behind. Your skin is scorching under his touch. 

"So if I'm angry with you, that makes your job easier?" 

He hums. "Mh-hmm. Much easier." 

You hold your breath as he finishes up, a gentle patting motion as he was instructed. 

"How some girls do this every day," he mutters. 

"It gets easier." 

"Yeah?" He drags his pinky down your cheek without thinking. "Hopefully this is my last time. It looks fine. Maybe don't stop in direct sunlight." 

He collects all of his things and pulls the makeup bag into his chest, easing his way out into the aisle again. You follow. Everyone else has left, except for a pearly-smiled flight attendant, who's smile grows impossibly wider as they approach. 

"Everything okay today folks?" he asks. "How was your flight?" 

James offers thank-yous and guides you down the length of the plane to the exit. You're quiet from the plane to the steps, his hand ghosting your shoulder, to the tarmac, where your security entourage awaits. Including James there are eight bodyguards. Two stick close, five form a mock perimeter around you. 

"Unfortunately, you might draw attention from the protection detail alone. It's up to you, Princess, but I can hide your face." 

"Is that… dramatic?" 

"It's completely up to you. I don't think it's dramatic. Just depends on how comfortable you are with your face potentially being used somewhere." 

"Can I– Maybe I'll stay close," you say, pulling your hood up. 

"Yeah. Tell me if you're uncomfortable." 

He takes you by the elbow and you walk. There aren't any paparazzi waiting outside, and James thinks maybe the news of your arrival has escaped them, and you won't be exposed to the madness that is paps with a story like this one, until he sees Sirius and Remus waiting at the glass doors into the airport. 

"Can't we go around?" Sirius asks. 

"They have to check our passports, idiot," Remus says, with little malice. 

"You can fucking see them, mate," he says to James. 

James motions for you to stand where you are and crosses the gap to get a better look. Mickey takes his place by your side. 

"Fuck," he hisses, "what the fuck is that? Who fucking leaked?" 

"Should I be worried?" he hears you ask quietly. 

"Mickelson, give the Princess your sunglasses." 

"So yes, then," you say. 

James props open the door with his foot. "Princess, you're going first. They'll expect you in the middle. Hopefully that'll minimise what they can get." He holds out his arm. 

You slot perfectly underneath it. 

"Ready?" he asks. 

You don't look very ready. You nibble your lip and nod anyhow, tucking your face into his front. James walks you forward, into a storm of white flashes and shouting, the precipice of your new life.

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thank you so much for reading! I really hope you enjoyed this chapter <3 please consider reblogging if you did, I'd love to know what you thought and what you want to see in the next one! and a happy new year !!!!

[lurkingshan]

Talk to me about noble idiocy! I know it is one of your most beloathed tropes... what makes you dislike it particularly? Are there examples or variations that you find more tolerable? Or ones that you feel are especially egregious?

Wow, what a gift. Thank you for inviting me to rant about my beloathed, noble idiocy.

So first, what is it? Noble idiocy is a very well worn drama trope that in its barest definition means that a character does something stupid for ostensibly noble reasons. In most dramas, it shows up in the form of one character destroying a relationship for the other person’s “own good.” It is usually justified under the notion that the noble idiot is trying to protect their beloved, and it most often shows up as the final act conflict in romances. As a drama viewer, I hate this trope for so many reasons.

Let me count the ways:

The trope is predicated on the notion that the noble idiot knows what is best for their partner and is entitled to act in their interest, usually without their consent or knowledge

It’s also a trope based in a failure or outright refusal to communicate, which is always a frustrating thing to watch

Committing an act of noble idiocy is a breach of trust in a relationship that is hard to believably come back from, as it requires deeply hurting the person you claim to love and feeling righteous about it to boot

It’s also just infantilizing and shows deep disrespect for one’s partner and their agency to make their own choices

Most dramas don’t actually hold the noble idiot to account, uncritically accepting the notion that they believed they had a good reason for what they did and thus should be easily forgiven

Consequently, an act of noble idiocy often destroys any faith the audience has in the relationship and the inevitably tacked on happy resolution falls flat

The trope is very often used cheaply as an easy shortcut for conflict when a drama is running out of steam or isn’t sure how to fill its runtime, and thus tends to feel false and sometimes even like a complete violation of character

So yes, noble idiocy on my screen is an automatic groan for me and usually takes a drama down in my estimation because it’s just such a lazy, overused trope. But there is a spectrum and some versions are more palatable than others. For instance, if the noble idiot has extremely well-established reasons to think they are not good for their partner, the drama has been naturally building to a break, and the partner is well aware of what is happening and why, I find that much easier to swallow.

A good example of this take on the trope is Just Between Lovers, a kdrama about healing from a traumatic incident and its aftereffects. Gang Doo, the male lead, feels he is holding his girlfriend back, and so he takes a job that will send him away for awhile to give her a chance to move on. She doesn’t want him to leave, but she is fully aware of where he is going and why. So while she’s frustrated and hurt as she watches him go, she isn’t left wondering what went wrong or thinking this is about anything but his trauma, which she already knew about. She knows it is because he loves her so much that he is leaving. As a result, their reconciliation was believable.

The next step down is the just plain stupid variation, in which the noble idiot doesn’t realize there will be fallout for their failure to communicate their intentions when they decide to abruptly leave their partner. This version showed up in Because This is My First Life, a kdrama about a contract marriage, when the heroine, upon falling in love for real with her husband, decided she didn’t want a fake marriage anymore. She decided to end the relationship and take a short time away so they could start fresh. The problem? She didn’t tell him that’s what she was doing, she just left him with no explanation. The male lead, a neurodivergent person who had struggled to open up to her in the first place, was deeply damaged by this abandonment. It’s an act a person claiming to love him would never do. Because of that, I can never love the drama wholeheartedly or trust in that relationship, which really pissed me off because until that final act of noble idiocy, it was a lovely and thoughtful romance.

By far the worst version of this trope is what I call the needlessly cruel variation, where the noble idiot outright lies to their partner about their feelings and intentions as a way to make a clean break. This usually takes the form of claiming not to love them anymore, and it is fucking infuriating. Plus and Minus is a great exemplar of this version of the trope, and it’s the reason I start hissing every time it comes up. After pursuing a relationship with his lifelong best friend, Li Kung bows to homophobic familial pressure and ends their relationship by claiming he misread his feelings and does not love Tse Shou after all, leaving Tse Shou confused and destroyed, having just lost both his lover and his best friend with no warning and in the cruelest way imaginable. It was out of character for Li Kung and absolutely untrue to their relationship dynamic. That the show then tried to tack on a fluffy happy ending after that unbelievable breach of trust just made me even more angry and I will honestly never forgive it.

There are others that fall somewhere along the spectrum—A Boss and a Babe, for instance, lives somewhere in the gray space between the second and third variation, as Cher told Gun he was leaving him because they were not compatible and told him not to look for him, and failed to communicate that his intention was to finish his degree so that they would become more compatible. It was cruel in that there was zero reason for him to not just tell Gun what he was doing, but it was based in Cher just being low (high) key stupid about other peoples’ emotional needs rather than him intentionally setting out to break Gun’s heart.

And then there’s something like We Best Love, which starts out giving the impression that we are dealing with noble idiocy before peeling back the layers to reveal that both Shi De and Shu Yi had been tricked into thinking the other abandoned him, and it was actually Shu Yi’s dad who interfered to keep them apart and confused. Shi De was definitely an idiot for never talking to Shu Yi to confirm the breakup and trying to defeat his dad on his own, but he never actually nobly dumped Shu Yi in the first place. It’s an interesting twist on the trope that starts as infuriating and becomes more sympathetic as it’s unraveled.

In conclusion: I really do despise noble idiocy narratives on the whole. But that doesn’t mean it’s a completely useless trope, and there are dramas I love that have deployed milder versions of it. It can and has been used effectively in a way that supports character and leads to relationship development. It’s just so rarely the case that I instinctively recoil from it, and I wish drama writers would stop and think 12 times before deciding if its use is really necessary or compelling in their stories.

[herofics]

Friend taking advantage, feat Dabi

A/N: I think I’ve done some bad/toxic-ish friend stuff before which you can find here, but I’ve been feeling like this recently so I wanted to vent. I haven’t written for Dabi in a while so I picked him, also I kinda need his brand of jackass attitude for this. I wrote this as platonic but take it how you will

“Oh my fucking god!” you groaned loudly, throwing one of the pillows from the couch towards the kitchen entrance way.

“What the hell?” Dabi exclaimed as he caught the pillow and threw it back at you. “I almost spilled my damn drink”

“Sorry” you muttered, looking at your phone with an irritated expression.

“Who pissed in your cereal this morning? You look annoyed” Dabi noted as he sat down at the other end of the couch.

“It’s my bff, or at least she’s supposed to be”

“Is this the bitch who keeps askin you for money all the time?”

“Yeah, but I wish you wouldn’t call her that” you sighed

“What’d she do this time?” he asked, taking a sip of his drink.

“After I moved here, she stayed in our hometown. She keeps guilting me about “leaving her” as if I did it just to leave her and not because I got into school here. It’s honestly driving me fucking insane” you threw your phone on the couch between you and Dabi.

“That sounds like a bitch move on her part, so I think callin her a bitch is justified” Dabi shrugged.

“And like, I go to my mom’s every now and then, which is like 45 minutes away from where she lives, and she still doesn’t come visit unless I pay her gas money. It’s like I have to buy her time if I even want to see her. Plus, the last time I was at my mom’s place, she was way more excited about seeing my mom’s new dog than about seeing me, even though we hadn’t seen each other in months” you huffed, leaning back on the couch.

“As I said, bitch move” Dabi burped

“Thanks for your support I guess” you rolled your eyes.

“You don’t need my support, you need to vent, and I’m listenin aren’t I?”

“Well yeah, but-”

“So keep talkin” Dabi cut you off.

“Fine. You know I’m bad at saying no to people, so pretty much every time she asks me for money, I give it to her, even if I’m not in a super good situation myself. She also kind of abuses that, because she knows I’ll pay for stuff so she’ll spend time with me. I feel like I’m pathetic, but she’s my only friend aside from you, and I don’t want to lose her. We’ve been friends for almost 18 years, so it’s hard to even think about letting go, even if it would be for my benefit”

“So basically, your friend is takin advantage of you, and you just plan on lettin her, even though you knew you shouldn’t?” Dabi groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I’m gonna get a headache from your idiocy”

“Are you calling me an idiot?” you asked, feigning offense

“No, but you’re bein dumb as hell right now” Dabi ruffled your hair, just to be annoying.

“Hey, don’t be an asshole” you protested with a smirk, trying to push his hand away.

“Ain’t that like a definin personality trait of mine though?” he asked, giving up on messing with your hair.

“Well yeah, but I wish you’d aim it at someone else” you rolled your eyes.

“There’s no one else around, so… or do you want me to go give your bff a piece of my mind?”

“No, it’s between me and her, so I think I need to be the one to talk to her” you sighed. “And I think if you talked to her, she might get on your nerves and end up a pile of ash”

“Eh, maybe” Dabi shrugged.

“Thanks for listening and only being a little bit of a jackass about it” you smiled.

“Well I’m mostly here for your drinks and to hide from the cops but-”

“And there’s that asshole of a villain I know” you cut him off and smacked the side of his thigh.

“I do have a reputation to uphold, you know” Dabi grinned.

You just rolled your eyes, but you were still smiling. He was a total asshole sometimes, but he could still be helpful too.

[rynekins]

Once again my mind is plagued with Sideshow Bob brainrot and I must infodump about him for a bit to clear it. This is a sorta continuation of this post where I ramble about how prison warped Bob’s personality. While I often consider doing a more structured series of Sideshow Bob reviews, I have nothing concrete planned at the moment, so posts like these will remain sporadic. However, I am rather open for more discussion with those who dare ask.

The focus today is on Sideshow Bob’s defining character trait.

There are many popular labels used for Sideshow Bob that fail to paint a full picture because the very opposites of those aspects are also true to his character. Highly educated with a great capacity for idiocy. Sophisticated with bouts of unhinged rage. A mastermind whose plans never work. A murderous psychopath who’s never actually murdered anyone and has attempted to reform. A villain who has saved the day, more than once. A failure that never gives up. All of these apply but I feel he has a more comprehensive character trait. One that remains true in every appearance, exemplified in all of his actions and downfalls. Above everything else, and I say this with the utmost affection, Bob is an attention whore.

Bob needs an audience like he needs air to breathe. All the world’s a stage and he lives to perform. He's pathetically desperate for your reaction, whether it’s praise, scorn, fear, or a laugh. He’ll sing, act, tell jokes, contort his body, or share the details of his cunning scheme with you, even if it jeopardizes everything he’s worked for, in exchange for a fleeting moment of recognition.

He wants to be seen, heard, known, understood, celebrated. Don’t we all. But his craving for validation can never be satisfied, which led him down this road of suffering. In the flashback in “Brother from Another Series”, during the sidekick audition, Bob looks a bit more composed than usual.

This is the earliest moment in his life that we witness. He’s hiding all his iconic hair in a hat and presents himself with dignity and poise; is this where he gets bit by the acting bug and everything changes for him? Doubtful, since his mother is a famous actress and he probably grew up in a home that valued the arts. I think he might have been repressing a lot of his more comical tendencies at this point, then unleashed them due to an unexpected pie to the face. Bob is angry at first, but within seconds relishes having an audience’s approval. All it took was Krusty calling him a “genius” and Bob’s fate was sealed. In “Krusty Gets Busted,” it’s up to interpretation if Bob genuinely wanted to solve Bart’s problem out of the goodness in his heart, or if his ego demanded that he prove to his audience what a good role model and host he can be. In” Sideshow Bob Roberts,” he charms everyone in town with his silver tongue, but is still so insecure about how he’s perceived that he feels he has to cheat to win the election. In “Cape Feare,” Bart compliments his voice and he’s all too eager to boast his musical talent. In “Sideshow Bob’s Last Gleaming,” being called “smart” is enough to let his guard down.

He needs constant reassurance that he’s smart, talented, and loved. I believe that in “Black Widower”, Bob’s courting of Selma wasn’t a ruse, at least not at first. They probably had nothing in common (certainly wouldn’t bond over media taste) except that both were painfully lonely. They fell fast in what they thought was love because they showed each other the slightest bit of affection, then opened the floodgates of built up feelings that had nowhere else to go. But realizing there would always be another man in her life more important than him, MacGyver, any love Bob felt towards Selma evaporated.

Combine this pettiness with his freshly warped sense of morality courtesy of Springfield Penitentiary, and he would find this sudden violent hatred justifiable. But everything has to be a spectacle with Bob, so of course he would end things with a heckin’ fiery explosion. As we have established, Bob is prone to self-sabotage. He can be unbearably pretentious, so he struggles finding others that share his passions. But Bob isn’t a gatekeeper for these interests. He would love nothing more than to discuss art, music, literature and theater and convince others to appreciate them as well. He has a desire to teach, and finds fulfillment when he helms his own educational program with an audience willing to listen and cheer him on. He doesn’t have such luck with his peers, who tend to throw his books back at him. In the episode “The Man Who Grew Too Much”, Homer mentions Mozart’s name and you can tell Bob is ready to drop everything and gush about a special interest, but Homer then reveals that he doesn’t really care. So imagine being in an incredibly niche fandom with no one but the void to hear your headcanons or fan favorites. That’s Bob's predicament, but he’s persistent (and maniacal).

Little brother Cecil is similar, but he’s more likely to back down when the audience doesn’t indulge him.

It is left to our imagination what their childhood was like. Their mother might have encouraged them both to pursue theater, but did either of them ever feel pride in their accomplishments? Is there a reason Cecil gives up and Bob can’t be stopped? Perhaps Bob leans into the villain role because he’s convinced himself he was born for it (give him credit, he does play it cartoonishly well), but when the tables turn he’s equally as enthusiastic playing the part of a noble hero. He seems unable to turn off the dramatics either way. There have been a few moments when he admits he does not want to commit to a violent act, and you could argue it’s because deep down he knows he’s playing a character that he's taken too far and that it isn’t his true self, or maybe he's horrified his true self is a monster and he’d rather play a different character as a means to contain it (I am not referring to moments from “Day of the Jackanapes” or “The Great Louse Detective”, moreso “The Man Who Grew Too Much”, “Gone Boy”, and “Bobby It’s Cold Outside”). His instincts during these moments seem to be to run away.

But Bob can’t live secluded in his lil lighthouse forever, even if it means no one gets hurt and he would be free. Prison made him crazy. Isolation would destroy him.

[sky-kiss]

Jaheira x Tav: Injury

A/N: @flamemittens was kind enough to prompt me. Jaheira and Sol, one is injured, and the other is reacting to it. So, as I wait for events in BG2 to happen, have something inspired/informed by a moment in her BG2 romance track.

Jaheira x Solaen: Like, honestly, he'd probably kill himself if she asked. He thinks that perfectly justified. It infuriates her.

The arrow barely pierces his armor. Solaen thinks nothing of it—why should he not move in front of the blow? What self-respecting male would not act in favor of their Ilharess? There is some blood, yes, and he may yet bruise, but the wound is such a little thing to trade for her safety.

It is no small shock when she rounds on him with the grace and fury of a displacer beast, claws out, hackles raised. "What were you thinking? No. Do not answer—you clearly were not. It is the only excuse for this…reckless idiocy."

"Ilharess…"

"Do not." Jaheira steps in close as if to intimidate him with her proximity. Some of the flippancy has bled from her posture—her gestures remain excessive and dramatic but held more tightly to her chest as if to guard herself. Her accent is thicker when she speaks, and he sees some of the violence of her youth still woven into her being. "What if the arrow had struck higher? The head? The throat? What then, idiot boy? Did you consider this, eh?" 

He stares at her, nakedly puzzled. "No."

Jaheira scoffs, making that displeased sound, guttural and half caught in her throat. "Aye, I suppose I should make allowances—say  that your honesty soothes some of the sting of this…stupidity." She jabs a finger at his chest. "Do not let it happen again." 

Solaen snatches her wrist. "I defer to you in many things, Harper, but do not presume to order me—I am not one of your cubs." No fear bleeds across her face, only fresh rage—calling to something equally ugly in him. 

"You are not. They know I am no wilting flower in need of tending." 

"You are no flower," he concedes. "Ilharess, you are entirely capable. This was never in doubt." 

"And yet, you interceded." 

"It would have been…" the drow sighs, releasing her wrist. The words taste too soft, a little like poison on Solaen's tongue—in the Underdark, they would have been more damning than any such substance. "The thought of you coming to harm…" he cleared his throat. "I would not—will not— permit it. Accept that."

"Accept that," she waves him off. "And now you think to give me orders." 

"In this alone." Solaen sighs. In private, he will permit himself to touch the curve of her waist rather than her bicep. It is a weakness, but one they have agreed upon. "You are…something precious." 

"Ugh." But she leans into him, expression softening. Her touch strays to the wound—barely an injury. He feels her magic wash over him, unlike Minthara or Shadowheart's. It is the coolness of a mountain stream, clean and clear.

He snickers, dipping his head to nip at her cheek. Ah, she is aged, yes, but there is a hint of color in her cheek. He chases it, his voice low. "Worthy of protection." 

Jaheira snickers, patting his cheek with perhaps a touch too much force. "Perhaps we should have the cleric inspect you—you seem to have suffered a concussion when I was not looking." The half-elf sighs, pressing her forehead to his chest briefly before stepping away. "Come. I have played the fool and vented my anger on you…let us move on, lest this old woman find more ways to shame herself." 

[saltminerising]

S from Shadow here. First of all, I want to apologize for my part in the thread killer list. I know the list did damage to the entire UMA community and I think everyone in it deserves an apology for my idiocy. I also want to clarify some things about my role in the thread killer list, because there's some misinformation about me being spread around that I want to clarify.

I did not end up helping with the list. That was all D. I pushed for a longer time for skins to be considered thread killers. 2-3 hours was ridiculous at the time and I pushed for longer. The only thing I did was suggest a spreadsheet and offer to code it.

The reason I did in the first place is because I genuinely thought I was helping the community. I know it sounds dumb, but at the time I thought it was the right thing. I didn't stop to consider the effect it would have on the artists and if I had thought about it for even one second, we wouldn't be here today.

I understand now that what I said and offered to do was stupid and harmful. I'm sorry for all the damage I caused to the UMA community as a whole. I have edited that post where I offered to code the spreadsheet with an apology. I don't expect everyone to forgive me, I just want people to understand there was no malice.

I don't stand for art elitism. I think it's made the art community a toxic place and I try to go out of my way to encourage other artists. I feel like people have been assuming I was trying to be elitist when that wasn't my intent. I understand how what I said could be interpreted that I was and I want to work on that.

I am not friends with S, D, or RW. I don't think I'd really talked with any of them before this and I haven't talked to them since. Please stop calling us buddies. I don't know about the relationship between S, D and RW but I don't know them. I would really like if people would stop acting like I'm as bad as them. They all doubled down on the thread killer list being right, I didn't. They're full ass adults, I'm a minor. If the minor in the situation can admit they were wrong, the adults in the situation sure as hell can. Instead they've chosen to double down and I don't think they'll change their minds.

I've asked SMR to pause posts containing me. You're allowed to hold me accountable and be upset with me for my actions, I get it. However, it's messing with my mental health and that's why I've asked SMR to delete posts mentioning me. As horrible as you may think I am, I don't think what I did was egregious enough to justify severely messing with my mental health.

The idea of the thread itself is flawed. It's fundamentally "I hate this art, so I'm gonna go get another artist's art I like more!" This was inevitable. This thread was always going to be a clusterfuck and Aeq should have just locked it when this issue started. Something similar is probably going to happen again in this thread. The entire idea of this thread is doomed to fail.

Once again, I'm sorry for the damage I caused the UMA community and I understand I'm going to have to face the consequences of encouraging the thread killer list to grow. I just want people to understand my side and understand I didn't do it with malicious intent. I don't speak for S, D or RW. I don't know what their intentions were. I just wanted a chance to apologize and explain my intentions. I feel judged without the chance to explain myself. Thank you for taking the time to hear me out

[mikeellee]

Let's talk more about Kudou - the fucking idiot commander - who's bright idea to save Japan in THE LAST OFA USER is to Kamikaze himself and sacrifice OFA to Shig?

...Ummm what? Am I meant to buy this guy commanded anyone?! 🤣😂🤣

He must have killed his whole squadron then if his plans are normally this level of idiocy.

All this realistically would do is power up Shig even more to make him UNSTOPPABLE and in the process doom both Izuku with Japan as a whole.

Hi @doodlegirl1998

Ok, first let´s all agree here Hori just wants to end this damn manga. So before I go into detail about this shit show, let´s talk about one good thing he did: He was nice to Yoichi. No, there was no gain for Kudou to be nice to Yoichi he did bc yes...granted maybe Kudou was bad to Yoichi in some form and we didn´t see, however, he can´t match AFO. He didn´t even know about ofa so him saving Yoichi was selfless.

That is his only good trait. He was nice to Izu 2.0

Now, let´s shit on this moron: He held a grudge against Izu for no reason, and some people TRY to justify "Ah ha DFO" which first off, Kudou was killed 200 years ago...how HE would know IZU IS AFO´S SON? Which btw, Izu is not AFO´s son and makes the whole justification lame ...this fandom will go beyond to protect any Bakugou, hm?

This MF wanted to buff with a kid who is fighting something WAY beyond his pay raise. Never mind how this MF refuses to work with the only hope to end AFO...for reasons (even if DFO became real, I don´t think his defenders realize how this makes him pathetic "He is fighting with a kid who has no idea of who is his father" like, my guy, Kudou and BRUCE is being incredibly stupid by beffing with Izu, regardless if afo is his dad or not. Again, fandom stop trying to defend this bozo)

It´s so unfair Izu to be saddled with the second coming of BK. Look, while BK may not be related to Kudou bc "AFO MURDER HIS ENTIRE FAMILY AND ALL WOMEN KUDOU EVEN SAID HI" I do think they are related spiritually, which honestly? This makes it worse.

Now, why Kudou start a revolution against AFO? The fandom preaches "EVIL EMPIRE" But no one ever talked about it, which if his empire was SO EVIL...I think we could see echoes of it. NOPE. All we see is AFO killing people (BAD, let me make clear it´s bad)but most of his killings seem to be out of the moment. Like, I know people want to see AFO like this smart and manipulative asshole "I killed this random Joe to further my ultimate goal" when in the canon is more like "LOL I´M EVIL"

Like we see AFO in a penthouse, for sure he killed people to get the penthouse, but while IS BAD, could this action result in LE REVOLUTION? Like, imagine if Kudou is rich and AFO random killed makes Kudou lose his money it´s a fair reason to hate him...but KUDOU HAS AN ARMY. Why do people follow him? Did AFO kill their loved ones and or steal money?

Hori: BK is the best in all forms.

Kudou didn´t get a single win! He was murdered by AFO, couldn´t protect Yoichi...and FOR SURE PEOPLE WERE MURDER UNDER HIS COMMANDER.

Now, his plan is to give his quirk to SHIG...Bc OFA has all suicidals morons (Nana included, sorry) and Izu is saddled with this(a choice Hori made, remember Chapter 1?) that wants to Kamizake, don´t forget En wanted to be the sacrifice bc Smokescreen is a useless quirk (I agree, hence why in my fic I want to change his quirk, I feel a smokescreen is smth Mei could create with her gadget)

The idea is to fight Shig inside Shig...So Izu, rip your shirt sexily and look like a demon...you will have sex now!

Bc apparently Shig has a hate feeding him, literally. He has a lump on his head...(Star is touched by Baby Tenko´s sadness...I mean, she doesn´t know Shig is Tenko so this makes sense) This makes me think of cancer or tumor....and Izu needs to fight Shig inside Shig...All this is based on a moron´s plan who has no INFO TO BASE THIS DECISION.

Remember when Izu analyzed quirks, he stopped bc IT WAS CREEPY (insert bemused emoji) and now we have Bk3 doing this, and Izu going ok with this. HE IS GIVING UP HIS QUIRK BC BK3 SAID SO (this is equally bad if Izu had given ofa to Bk)

I made jokes on the server about Izu and Shig having sex...but I still hate the chapter.

Also demon!Izu looks like Tanjirou from Demon Slayer.

[o0e3ww]

Finished Strangers From Hell/Hell is Other People

Well, I'll give it a 7, overall it was a good experience. Such a mix of Hannibal and the 5th season of AHS (not in terms of quality, character interaction reminded me)

!spoilers!

I didn't like the way the nature of characters were revealed. The villain is an artist, but mostly in the dialogues, it was hinted at but not shown properly. Yeah, for me two pretentious statements and a bracelet made of teeth is not enough. The motivation isn't quite clear to me either, like it's not serious enough. Are they bad because they're bad? Because they lived with a person who encouraged their illness? Well then devote some dialogue to that, otherwise they only slip in scenes with the victims being abused. I really missed the personality of the hostess aka the creator. Maniac mum.

Some kind of simplistic approach, as if they have watched TV series and decided to make a Frankenstein's monster out of the types of killers. The actions of the villainous villains didn't give me the feeling of some skillful manipulations, they are rather clumsy.

The mc's girlfriend doesn't have time for him? Really? She doesn't have time to talk to him when they see each other several times in 10 episodes and each time she refuses to listen to him? They're actively chatting, you can share your experiences there too. I know the whole "don't burden your neighbour" thing, but they're not school friends, they're not colleagues, they didn't just start dating, they're in a relationship and complaining about life to loved ones is commonplace for everyone in general.

80% of their dialogue:

-Hey, what's going on with you?

-Hi, I'm having a rough time and…

-Oh, my God, shut up. Why can't you be normal?!?!!!! * running away *

here I'm getting more and more angry B!tch, listen to him for like 2 minutes, he doesn't say anything weird or scary, YOU ASKED HIM. And it's not the idiocy of the characters or "problems of modern society" it's the bullshit that's necessary for the script to work. Honestly, this whole love line doesn't make any sense at all. It's a function. I didn't get into the girlfriend character, I don't find their relationship pleasant, I don't believe that "it" could be a pressure point on protagonist. The main villain has more chemistry with the main character. And here you could say "that's the point, his priorities change, the villain lures him" BUT! To justify mc's mental anguish, the bond between him and his girlfriend must also be strong. He has to have something he can lose.

The ending is just… "yeah, not everyone will understand." The whole thing with popular "highly intelligent" literature and games of who's crazy – doesn't work for me. It looks like a fanfiction by a 16 year old schoolboy. Honestly, mentioning Kafka so much lowered quality of the series for me. I understand where you got inspiration from, ok? The plot of "The Metamorphosis" is on the surface, mc himself says so, and not once. Why explain the things we understand? Better explain the things we don't.

[rtttas]

Okay, as far as I can tell from the posts on many social networks, more and more details are surfacing, indicating both Alex's guilt and its absence. The victims are accused of lying, Alex does not show any action or actions to prove his innocence or justify himself. The truth is blurred now and can be anything. Serious accusations have flown in his direction and ignoring them is the height of idiocy. I HOPE that Alex will really respond to all this, because otherwise his guilt will be too acute to give him the opportunity to calmly stay anywhere in the media

And you know, even if he turns out to be innocent in this regard, I'll say this. I'm not going to apologize, or even more so I have my opinion for the better in relation to him.

Even if you do not take into account the possible involvement in this kind of thing, which everyone is talking about now, Alex has too many sins, which, worse, were ignored by the ENTIRE community of this project. It was as if Alex was the messiah, whose words absolutely everyone who was part of the community had to obey, and only his feelings were defined as a beacon. The situation with the artists who draw his characters in a romantic relationship will not allow you to lie. So many people have been harassed because of this. Just because Alex can't tell himself apart from the damn character he's playing. Just because his project is "Too good" for that. Because he is " Not comfortable " and he does not want to accept the Internet the way it is. He is an infantile, tactless, selfish person who does not know how to take responsibility for his words, considers himself the navel of the earth and does not want to accept help to change himself.

Consider him a good person? Never.

If this situation surfaced and turned out to be false, it was only because Alex himself created such an atmosphere in the community. He pitted people against each other, making an innocent face, making it clear which people he did not want to see around him because they were not what he wanted them to be. As a good man, he had to accept this harmless, inescapable side of his community. But of course he didn't. It was convenient and "comfortable" for him to knock his fans into crowds so that they gnaw those who he did not like. Wonderful, of course.

Ironically, in some wrong way, I'm glad about this whole situation only because I can finally calmly criticize his terrible sides, which were previously ignored and condemned by the "elite" of this damn community.

Guilty or not, I will never consider him a good person. Only a good creator. And these are different concepts. It's time to accept it

I'm waiting for hatred in my direction for my opinion. All the worst to you.

[umbracirrus]

WIP Whenever 💛

I was thinking that I would most likely have a WIP out on Sunday because I wasn't mentally in the place to do anything on Wednesday and I'm busy tomorrow... But I've been able to get something pulled together!

My beloved idiots Balgruuf and Elyse are finally talking after their argument! But don't worry, there's some ✨drama✨ too hehe :)

I said that I wasn't gonna post The Perfect Storm WIPs for a while but oops. My hand slipped.

Thanks for the tags @pitiable-arisen and @bostoniangirl21!!

-------

The cold air actually felt nice against Elyse's skin for once as she stepped through the doors onto the balcony, and found herself surprised when she realised that laid out before her was the entirety of the city of Whiterun, almost like a tapestry spread across the ground below. Her feet carried her forward towards the wooden railings, and snow crunched beneath her gloved fingers as she took hold of it and gazed below.

"This is one of the few quiet places in Dragonsreach where people will not disturb me… usually because I do not allow anyone out here," Balgruuf stated from where he remained by the doors. "It is peaceful."

Her eyes fell shut as she exhaled quietly. "I can see why…" She then lowered her head, and released her hold of the railing so that she could turn back to face him. "Balgruuf, I-" Her voice caught as she began to feel tears building up in the corners of her eyes, her hands shaking as she wrapped her arms around herself. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for causing all of this trouble-!"

"What? Elyse, why are you-?" She never noticed that he had closed the distance between them until he had taken hold of the top of her arms, his breathing shaking and voice almost wavering as he spoke. "No… No, none of this is your fault," he whispered, one of his hands moving to wipe away some of the tears falling down her face as she quietly wept. "I overstepped, that has been made abundantly clear to me whilst you were gone. You had every right to get angry at me. Please… don't cry, you did nothing wrong."

Slowly, she moved closer to him, and it didn't take long for her head to be resting against him as his arms wrapped around her. His heart ached for her – after what he had done, and her belief that she had to apologise when he knew that it was he who needed to do so… It would take more than words to compensate. He had hurt her badly. Perhaps things would never return to how they were… but perhaps it was an opportunity to learn from his own idiocy and rebuild their relationship – dare he say friendship? – stronger than before.

"I am the one who should be saying that they are sorry," he whispered, taking a deep breath and a step back. "I know that it will not change anything now, and is long overdue… but may I explain why I did what I did? I am in no way justifying what I did… but I want you to know that none of this – absolutely none – is your fault."

Wiping away some of the tears which were still slowly slipping down her face, she gave him a slight nod. "That… That's why I came here. I wanted to know… wanted to know why you paid off that fine. I left it be because I knew… because… Ulfric was the one who instigated it. He grabbed my arm! Was I not meant to fight back against somebody who tried to keep me as a prisoner?" Her tone of voice grew louder and more panicked as she spoke, before taking a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself down. "I was told that you likely only paid it off to help, but if I wanted to know for sure about why, I needed to talk to you… That it would give me peace of mind."

Balgruuf glanced back towards the doors leading out onto the balcony, and pursed his lips together. "I believe that you had best sit down for what I need to tell you then. We could return indoors, or I can bring some seats outside… it's your choice."

"… I wouldn't mind staying out for a while longer. Maybe if it gets any colder we can go indoors, but for now…"

He nodded at her response, then went over to the doors and quickly slipped inside. She remembered that there had been a long table surrounded by chairs just by the door, so it wouldn't take long for him to return. When he did though, she had to go to hold the door open for him as he pulled the two seats outside.

When they eventually sat down, the wind thankfully remaining little more than a gentle breeze, she couldn't help but notice the conflict across his face as he looked towards the floor with his arms folded over. But he soon began to speak. "In his usual correspondence with me, Ulfric began accusing Whiterun of harbouring a criminal, and he made it clear that he was talking about you," he stated, his fists starting to clench. "He made an ultimatum - pay off the fine, or Whiterun gets attacked."

Her blood ran cold – colder than the snow and ice and wind which surrounded them on that balcony. "B-But I'm not…"

"I know."

[enteringdullsville]

A seasonally appropriate updated version of the old relationship chart.

EDIT: I just want to give advice for some other aspiring writers out there who want to write for pairings but aren’t necessarily writing romance stories.

If you want people to take your pairings seriously (and I don’t mean people who don’t ship them, but rather people with their high and mighty “this pairing shouldn’t be canon” perspectives), you need to be able to justify why they’re with someone and not somebody else. People have types; for example, Crimson (who isn’t pictured) is looking for someone who’s down to earth, sensible, mature, and dependable. That is to say, nobody in the core cast.

And on that note, if any of you are experimenting with bigger core casts, don’t feel compelled to pair everyone up with another member of said core cast. I don’t mean that in an aromantic way (although that certainly helps), but it certainly feels less forced and makes romantic plot lines come off as less suffocating. What you see here is 2/3 of my main cast. I’m also a firm believer in not changing orientations in characters that have set-in-stone canon ones, regardless of what they are, so I just make everyone who isn’t aro swing every way, no matter how camp or butch they seem. That should at least take the edge off of shipping wars.

Lastly, if you feel a pairing comes off as “boring”, congratulations on writing a healthy relationship! Much more to the point, just focus on what those characters have in common. There was a point in development where Rudy/Olive felt a little too generic, so I took a closer look at previous stuff I had done for them, as well as what their respective backstories, character flaws, and motivations were to build upon their dynamic. Olive especially benefits more from this process in the long run, since I was paranoid about people viewing her as a “Satellite Love Interest”.

Looking entirely within the core cast :

Violet X Gordon/Strong Suit

Both are giant nerds who love to write creatively

Best friends since they were 8. Began dating/got married when they were 23

Violet’s demiromantic; it took her a couple extra years to realize she wanted a romantic relationship with him

Gordon was in love with her since he was 13 and was fully prepared to let it go if it meant they could stay friends

Married for 5 years with a sweet little handful daughter

Mild mannered behemoth and his vicious scarecrow wife

They’re each other’s muses

He can carry her with one arm

Rudy X Olive/Scratch Paper

Dorks, the lot of them

Rudy has the right combination of being fun but not insane; perfect for someone introverted but silly like Olive

Initially tried to dismiss her feelings as an infatuation before settling for simply pining in secret. She completely forgot that the entire series is on the internet for people, Rudy included, to see

Rudy likes her in turn because she doesn’t view him as a menace or a child. He also sees her as the cool, mysterious loner girl and that’s a massive plus for him

He knows she has it bad but is waiting for her to build confidence

She’s teaching him how to draw. He loves her surrealist works

She’s not afraid to take shots at him or call him out on his idiocy

J. X Paige/Mystery Novel

Neither talk that much and have definite social anxiety, but they ironically are very comfortable around each other

Her interest in him started off as curiosity about J.’s generally mysterious behavior

They’re uncharacteristically cuddly with each other

J. very briefly used to have an unrequited crush on Peony. Paige is still a little salty if it gets brought up

Since Rudy and J. are brothers, Olive and Paige have gotten closer as friends in turn

Angie X Bryan/Sugar and Spice

Silly, flirty girl and soft, dorky guy

Angie hits on him constantly, but since she hits on a lot of people (and a lot of people hit on him) he initially doesn’t take her advances seriously

Angie wants to squeeze and hug him so badly

Bryan wishes he had her confidence; Angie wishes she had his sensibility

She can lift him over her head

Chloe X Geneva/Mad Science

Tsundere and Manic Pixie Dream Girl

Geneva thinks she’s just the cutest thing

She can easily pick Chloe up and it drives her crazy

Chloe catches feelings quickly; Geneva’s of course oblivious

No matter what Chloe invents, Geneva still thinks she’s cool

Chloe’d be more outwardly receptive to her if she weren’t so obsessed with looking mature

Lyman X Ingrid/Death Glare

A more low key “background romance”

Sprang from Ingrid’s “freaky is hot” mentality

Lyman has no fear of Ingrid, and that helps their relationship

It takes a bit for Ingrid to see beyond his cool empath powers

Ingrid is surprisingly huggy with him. Lyman’s cool with whatever

Noah X Whitney/Checkmate

Chill slacker and high-strung rule follower

They’ve been friends for years so Whitney’s not as tsundere as Chloe, but she still refuses to admit her increasingly obvious feelings

She gets insanely jealous whenever Noah flirts with someone else, which is often

Geneva calls him a “notorious cootie catcher”. He’ll flirt with any Drewman older than 20, but all Whitney has to do is raise an eyebrow and he becomes a stuttering dork

He keeps her balanced, she keeps him motivated

Tyler X Fuchsia/Tooth and Nail

You know what? Actually screw opposites attract. Let similar people be in love for once

In all seriousness, while Fuchsia’s less likely to antagonize people unprovoked, Ty’s got better people skills

Established relationship. Tyler’s the one who vouched for Fuchsia to join ICT

Fuchsia gets very easily embarrassed by PDA

Most people are terrified of her, but Tyler thinks she’s adorable

Sometimes Fuchsia comes in to work with massive marks from Tyler’s shark teeth. Don’t bring it up to her face

Amber X Aaron X Perry/Triple A

The old Archie, Betty, and Veronica schtick

Both fall for her early on and she thinks both of them are cute. It takes a long time before Amber gets tired of their rivalry and takes them both

Amber totally calls the shots in their ménage à trois. Aaron and Perry are completely whipped

Amber and Aaron are a classic cheerleader and jock matchup. Both are peppy, goofy sweethearts

Aaron and Perry are a great rivals to lovers story. Even after burying the hatchet, they still try to one up each other constantly

Perry and Amber are yet another tsundere and cinnamon roll pairing, although since Perry’s so excited for somebody to think he’s actually cool, he’s a lot more outwardly nice to her, even before getting together

Both Aaron and Amber agree Perry’s adorable. Any affection they give him leaves him a blushing mess

Aaron is the one who carries them over his shoulders to prove a point

Amber’s endgame is to expand the relationship until she achieves world domination. Her sights are on Tyler and Fuchsia next.

Landon X Alexandre/Gilded Lily

Semi-toxic yaoi. Like, not so toxic that you wouldn’t want them to get together, but enough to stop them from being glurgey

Al’s normally a pushover, but Landon’s great at pushing his buttons to tick him off

“I can fix him” vs “I can corrupt him”

Landon’s best friends with Veronica, who ping pongs between wanting him to become her brother in law and threatening Landon to get his talons out of her big brother

Landon’s very selective of his partners. Alex ticks all his boxes of being sweet, perky, and a little awkward

[glasseditor]

reliability. [ds]

synopsis: “Clover knows so much about everything, and he’s so dependable… I want to be like that someday too.”

tags: deuce spade x reader, gender-neutral reader, sfw, fluff

ao3: reliability. [ds] word count: ~3.9k

a/n: deuce fans do you exist

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

“The third one in a row!” you cried out. 

“Hey c’mon, it’s really no big deal. Everyone failed that one! I definitely did…” Ace answered. The genuineness in his reply only served to tear into your ego further. 

“To be put on the same academic status as you is a crime,” you said, exasperation clear in your voice, “I studied so hard for this one!”

You had been staying up for so many nights that even Grim was beginning to worry for your wellbeing. You had crammed formula after formula into your brain, yet when it was time for the individual lab, you didn’t recognize a thing.

“Maybe I should try looking for a tutor.” you sighed, kicking a pebble with an air of frustration. 

“What? You said that you could do this ’100% on your own,’  remember?” Ace mocked, recalling how you had said that you would graduate without any academic help. It was true that you wanted to prove to the others that you were perfectly capable of being among their ranks despite lacking in any sort of magical ability. The thought of being able to brag about how you had passed all on your own filled you with pride. What you didn’t expect is that you would fail every important assignment that you would attempt, leaving you with the same academic standings as Ace and Deuce, NRC’s resident dumb and dumber.

“Whatever! If I find a tutor on my own, that still counts as doing it 100% on my own,” you justified, “Plus, I’ll still need to do the individual labs by myself anyways so I’ll still be doing it myself.”

“What kind of logic is that?” Ace laughed, impressed by the leaps in logic you were able to make in order to save your pride. You puffed your cheeks and turned your face away from your friend, your steps seeming heavier than they were before. Sensing your frustration, Ace decided to stop the antics and throw you a bone. “Y’know if you’re being serious, I heard that Trey is helping Deuce out with some of his studies. He’ll probably be willing to help you too and if you ask realllyy nicely maybe he’ll even keep your tutoring sessions a secret!”

“Beats the idea that I had…” you mumbled, embarrassed by the idiocy of the plan that you had thought up.

“Huh? What were you thinking?” Ace questioned, the excitement in his eyes was made obvious at the opportunity to poke fun at you.

“I was just gonna take a quick little trip to Octavinelle,” you were barely audible, the shame already apparent on your cheeks. “Look, it was just the first thing I came up with! Doesn’t mean I was actually gonna do it. Though I guess if it came to it..”

“And I suppose that would be doing things ‘100% on your own’ too?” Ace spoke, barely making an effort to contain his laughter.

“Well, I would be going there ‘100% on my own’ so…yeah! It does still count since I’m the one putting in the effort to make the deal!” you retorted with satisfaction.

Ace was beginning to think that, by some miracle, he was the smart one of the group.

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

Standing outside of the classroom door, you fiddled with the hem of your ill-fitted uniform. Trey had agreed to tutor you along with a few other students at the cost of nothing, stating that it was “just what a good senior would do.” Despite his reassurance that it was no trouble for him, you couldn’t help but feel bad for taking up so much of his time.

Upon entering the lab, you notice three other students along with your tutor. Two Heartslabyul students that you had never seen before and Deuce Spade, your good friend. You had known that Trey was helping Deuce with his studies too, but you were surprised to see that you would be in the same study group together. Along with the three students, you also took note of how everyone was already seated at an individual lab station with all their study material out. Great, you were the last one to show up.

“Hey, sorry for being late!” you walked up to Trey, mentally berating yourself for your lack of punctuality. 

“It’s no problem. I haven’t started going over the experiment so you’re actually not late at all,” he replied, “You can go ahead and sit at that lab station on the left.”

Sitting down at the station, you made eye contact with Deuce who was situated at the station farthest from you. He quickly averted your gaze and turned away, making an attempt to hide his face despite there being nowhere to hide. Your face twitched in confusion at his unusual behavior. Had you done something to offend him? Nothing that you could recall.

Wanting to get to work, you simply brushed it off as him wanting to focus on the lab that he was working on. He had been working extra hard to be a student that his mother could be proud of, after all.

You pulled out your previous lab for review and began to go over the steps again. Your head was already starting to pound and the red markings on your paper disheartened you. Picking up a glass filled with a pink liquid, you brought it up to your nose to smell it. Upon doing so, you notice Trey running over to your station just in time to see you turn away from the glass at the smell.

“Hey, watch it!” he warned, his voice full of concern, “That one’s toxic! It says so right there before the procedures.”

“What? I thought it was that one that’s toxic!” you pointed at glass with a jelly-like blue substance.

“No, I even labeled each of the glasses,” Trey turned the glass and pointed at the label that clearly highlighted your mistake, “Plus they’re completely different colors too.”

You buried your reddening face upon realizing how obvious your mistake had been. Despite the amount of studying and effort you put into this class, you were still held back by such elementary errors. If you couldn’t pass the retake lab, you would have to take extra lessons with Crewel. It was that punishment that was pushing you over the edge. 

The thought of spending any free time with him would make any student shiver, but it irked you even more because of how harsh he was on you in specific. Crewel, being a sadist and knowing that you were deficient in magical ability, took it upon himself to particularly pick on you. You were trying your best and you still couldn’t see any way that you would be able to pass. This feeling of frustration was unbearable.

And so, you did what any person who has experienced such wear-and-tear would do. You began to cry. It was a rare sight to see since you had always been the type of person that wouldn’t let things get to you. It even surprised Trey a little; even still, he managed to reach out to you.

“Hey, don’t stress about it,” Trey said, placing a hand on your back and rubbing circles in an effort to console you, “I know it’s frustrating but it’s really just a little mistake. You’re smart and diligent, so I know you can do it.”

“I’m sorry,” your shoulder shook as you tried to stop your tears, “I really don’t mean to cry. I don’t usually break this easily but I just don’t understand why I’m having such a hard time with this.”

“It’s okay to cry, so don’t beat yourself up too much about it. This lab was a really hard one. I can understand why you’re frustrated,” Trey’s words calmed you, “I’ll help you with it so don't worry, alright?”

His warm tone put you at ease and made it easy to calm down. He had always been so kind and reliable that it made you forget your worries for just a little while. It was enough time for you to be able to clear your head and think straight.

“You’re right,” you wiped your eyes, “The idea of having to sit in a room with Crewel for longer than I have to really scares me…but that won’t happen because I’m determined to pass and I have a great tutor.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” Trey spoke, glad that you had found the motivation to keep pushing yourself, “Let’s start the experiment again from the beginning. I’ll explain everything to you slowly so ask me if you have any questions, okay?”

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

You clapped your hands together as you successfully completed the last step of the lab. The potion, which had emitted a strange green smoke the last time you had attempted the lab, now had a brilliant blue shine. 

“I can’t believe I did it,” you rejoiced, “What would I do without you?”

“It was all you!” Trey answered, “I just gave a few pointers, that’s all.”

“Thank you, Trey! I’ll definitely pass the lab thanks to you,” you threw your arms around Trey in a hug, grateful that he had been so patient with you. However, your show of gratitude was cut short when you heard a clattering of glass and metal.

You and Trey both pulled away from the hug to look for the source of the commotion, but you didn’t miss the light pink that dusted his cheeks and ears. You made eye contact with Deuce who was simultaneously trying to avert your gaze and pick up all of the tools that he had dropped onto the floor.

“You’re starting to get the hang of this so I’ll leave you to it,” Trey laughed nervously looking in Deuce’s direction, “Plus it really looks like he really needs help so…”

You made a mental note to tease Deuce about the scene later. More importantly, you wanted to ask him why he was acting so strange. You and Grim would be heading over to Heartslabyul later today to meet up with Ace and Deuce anyways.

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

“Hey, Tweedledum and Tweedledee! Open up,” you knocked on the dorm door, cat in arms, “Grim’s heavy so hurry it up!”

“Geez, what’s with the nickname?” Ace pouted as he opened the door. You hurried in and settled Grim down on the bed.

“The bastard insisted that I carry him here and fell asleep when I said no!” you spoke noticeably out of breath.

“Well, I’m glad that you’re here now, but I have to go,” Ace spoke quickly, already heading towards the door.

“What?” you glared, annoyance clear in your tone, “Why didn’t you tell me earlier? Before I ran all the way over here?”

“Yeah, why didn’t you tell me earlier?” Deuce chimed in suddenly. He looked slightly panicked, his eyes warning Ace to stay.

“It just came up right now! It’s no big deal, you guys can just hang out together without me,” Ace said, one foot out the door, “I won’t mind I swear!”

“Ace!” you and Deuce called out at the same time, but he had already ran off, shutting the door before either of you could get ahold of him. After a sigh, a silence settled within the room.

“What’s wrong with that guy, seriously?” Deuce broke the silence. His bed shifted as you sat down next to him.

“Well…what now?” you asked. Ace had planned on showing you and Deuce a new spot to eat, so without him, your plans were completely ruined. Deuce responded to your question with silence.

You turned your face to look at him only to find that he was already looking at you. He was close. So close that you could see every little detail in his eyes. His cyan eyes shone brilliantly, and in the middle of them, you saw your reflection. Seeing your own face snapped you back to reality. He was so close. Your face began to heat up and you turned away in embarrassment. Why were you staring for so long?

“Oh, sorry!” Deuce apologized frantically, “I didn’t mean to stare!” Though you were still turned away from him to hide yourself after appearing so flustered, you took a quick glance at your friend to see that his expression matched yours. The tension in the room broke as you let out a quiet chuckle after seeing that you were both thinking the same thing. It was funny to see that you two could be so similar sometimes.

Why was it suddenly so tense between you two? It hadn't been like this before. Remembering that Deuce had been acting strange all day, you finally got to asking what was on your mind all day.

“Hey, Deuce,” he turned his attention to you when you spoke, “What’s up with you today?” After saying it, you realized that maybe your words were a bit too direct. You couldn’t help it! This awkward atmosphere was new when it came to Deuce.

“Ah, you noticed?” he scratched the back of his head and took a moment before giving you an answer, “Truth is, I was surprised to see you at that study session.”

“Why? You know I’m no genius when it comes to alchemy,” you laughed, “And didn’t Ace tell you that Trey was gonna start tutoring me?” His face showed the slightest hint of agitation when you spoke his upperclassman’s name.

“He did! But he never told me that you were in the same study group as me,” he looked away, “I guess, maybe I felt a little embarrassed that you saw me there.” You gave him a confused look. It was no secret that your whole trio isn’t exactly the most…academically capable. If you included Grim into the mix, your combined gpa would sink even lower. To hear Deuce admit that he felt embarrassed about it shocked you.

“You know I wouldn’t judge, right? I don’t think I’m even allowed to judge since I was there too.” you joked.

“I know, I know but,” he continued, “It’s just that…Clover knows so much about everything, and he’s so dependable. I want to be like that someday too! Seeing you get so excited after he taught you how to do the lab. I guess it made me a little…I don’t know what to call it!” There it was! The perfect opportunity to poke fun at him.

“Hehe, is that jealousy that I sense?” you teased, literally poking his cheek.

“No! It’s not jealousy! It’s…” he trailed off before admitting it, “Okay, I guess it is jealousy.”

“Finally!” you shouted, flopping down into his lap, “I’m so glad we cleared that up because the tension was seriously killing me!”

“H-hey, don’t you realize the implications of me being jealous?” he panicked when your face was suddenly looking up at him from his lap.

“Implication? Pretty big word, don’t you think?” you laughed it off, “I know what it means. So, let’s study together.”

“Huh?” he really didn’t understand you sometimes.

“Yeah well, Ace ditched us so we have nothing to do,” you spoke, still looking up at him, “and I honestly zoned out a little when Trey was going over some of the steps. I remember you looking really focused when he went over to help you, so I’m sure you have a few things that you could teach me.”

With your words, Deuce’s face lit up. It wasn’t direct, but he knew that this was your odd way of saying you believed in his academic ability. You were coming to him for help even though you had connections with students that earned perfect scores. You were counting on him to help you and he wasn’t about to let you down.

“Alright, we’ll go over the lab together then,” he spoke confidently, “where did you start zoning out?”

“Err, to be honest…I think we need to go over the whole thing again. I know I did it right during the tutoring session but…I was just following Trey’s directions. I honestly had no idea what he was talking about.” ‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

D!!! Written in red with three exclamation points and circled more times than you could count.

“WHAT?” you cried out, “How could that be!”

It was a few days after you and Deuce took your lab retake. You had spent the whole night before studying with Deuce. He went over each and every step with you, simplifying his words so that it was easier for you to understand. (Was it really for you or was it because his vocabulary was more limited than he'd like to admit?)

“Really such a shame,” you jumped at Crewel’s voice behind you, “If you had answered even one more of the questions at the end of the lab correctly, you would’ve just barely passed. Looks like I’ll have to see your face more often during this break.”

You groaned, slumping down in your seat. More time with Crewel. Could anything be more dreadful? Despite your dilemma, you couldn’t help but wonder about Deuce. You wondered if he passed and whether or not he would be disappointed in you for failing again even after getting help. You avoided Ace and Deuce as class ended, but as you walked down the halls, a hand found itself on your shoulder.

“So, how’d you do?” it was Ace with a big smile on his face, “Yikes! I’m guessing not so well based off of the look on your face.”

“Whatever, asshole. Where’s Deuce? Did he pass?” you hoped that he had done better than you did.

“Yeah, he’s being interrogated by Crewel right now for cheating,” Ace answered, “He got a high C!”

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. Deuce worked so hard to pass and you were relieved that his efforts were not made in vain. In a way, you felt that his score was a victory for you too. The logic wasn’t really all there but you wouldn’t admit that. 

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

Later that afternoon, you found yourself at Ace and Deuce’s dorm again. Grim wanted to play Spelldrive with some Savanaclaw students, so you were there alone. A few knocks on the door later and the door creaked open with Deuce’s face peering out from it.

“Oh, it’s you,” he opened the door wider so that you could come in, “Ace stepped out just now by the way.”

“That’s fine, I came here to see you anyways.” you replied.

“I’m guessing you didn’t do too hot on the retake, right?” he got it right away.

“H-how did you guess??” you knew you were horrible at alchemy but were you really so bad that he knew you wouldn’t pass?

“Well first off, it was written all over your face! I saw you after class while Crewel was lecturing me on the importance of academic honesty,” he shivered as he recalled his chat with the professor, “Secondly, you weren’t exactly paying attention while I was helping you prepare for the lab.”

“I was paying attention!” you retorted, “Didn’t you see how hard I was working?”

“I saw you staring at me the whole time! I didn’t have the heart to tell you to stop…” he admitted, putting his arms around you as he saw your expression drop.

“I was just thinking really hard!” you whined. “I’m stuck with Crewel all break now.”

Your head dropped onto Deuce’s chest as you thought about the hell you would have to endure during break. 

“It’s over for me.” you cried, voice muffled by Deuce’s jacket as he put his arms around you. For a while, the two of you just stood like this. Deuce’s arms felt so comforting, it felt as though his embrace swallowed you whole. You felt so content like this that you almost forgot why you were so distressed in the first place. After thinking, Deuce finally spoke.

“I’ll help you.”

“What?”

“I’ll study harder than I ever have before and I’ll teach you all of it! That way, maybe you’ll get out of Crewel’s lessons early,” he spoke excitedly, “and then as a reward, maybe we could hang out together.”

“But we hang out all the time,” you laughed. 

“I mean…without Ace,” Deuce was glad that you couldn’t see his face reddening right now.

“Like…a date?” you asked, your face still in his jacket.

“Y-yeah, something like that,” he spoke hurriedly, “I could take you out on a drive on my Magic Wheel.” He recalled the wonder in your eyes when you saw him riding it around a track for the first time.

“Alright then, it’s a date!” you confirmed, “If I manage to pass, that is. Oh yeah! How did the whole cheating thing with Crewel go?”

“Well I really did do the lab all on my own so he had nothing to use against me,” he answered, “and he brought in the housewarden who told him that I have a clean, honest record.”

“I would kill to have seen the look on his face after that!” you reveled in the idea of Crewel being wrong and having to admit it.

“It was a little scary. Trust me you wouldn’t want to see it,” he convinced you.

“You’re seriously on your way to being an honors student now!” you said, “A high C! And Riddle stood up for you? What a scholar!”

“Right?” he spoke excitedly, “I think I’m finally making big steps towards being a great ma-” His sentence was cut short by a knocking, more like a banging, on the door.

“Hey! Are you guys done in there?” you heard Ace’s voice on the other side, “Riddle’s after me! Let me in, guys seriously!” The moment that Deuce ever so slightly cracked the door open, Ace quickly came pouring in, tripping on his own feet. “You guys took forever!”

“What happened?” Deuce asked.

“While I was giving you guys alone time for your coupley stuff, the housewarden caught me lounging around and said I could make better use of my time,” Ace explained, “Tried to get me to paint a whole garden! He’s seriously cra-”

“Coupley stuff? What do you mean by that?” you cut him off.

“Please don’t tell me that you didn’t even realize,” Ace shut his eyes tight, “If I went through all of that trouble to set you guys up and you’re still not together…I’ll be seriously pissed.”

“Y-you were setting us up?” Deuce asked, his face reddening.

“Oh come on!” Ace shouted, “Recommending the same tutor? Leaving you guys in the dorm together? You guys really didn’t notice all that hard work?”

“To be honest,” you started, “we were just kinda pissed that you ditched us.”

“Yeah! I mean no explanation or anything? Seriously?” Deuce added. You nodded after him and mumbled agreements.

“Well you guys might be pissed but I’m honestly the real mastermind here!” Ace boasted, “Hey! Guys don’t ignore me…guys?”

As Ace bragged about his achievements, you and Deuce had already started to leave the room while Ace sat there blankly.

“I’m sure they’ll appreciate it once they realize what I’ve done for them,” he stated.

Though you wouldn’t admit it, Ace really did contribute to the relationship that started between you and Deuce. Guess this was something that you could admit wasn’t done “100% by yourself.”

[blackberriebrambles]

The thing that's fun about the Vees is that they're all just horrible people. Like, genuine scum-of-the-earth evil. They feed off of each other's terribleness (and idiocy) and it's just such a recipe for disaster.

Like, everyone knows that Valentino deserves fire and brimstone and everything in-between. He's a predator, he's abusive, he's violent - that is all very evident onscreen.

But Vox and Velvette are bad too! They're all toxic as fuck! It's why they all get along so well!

Vox, especially - so often he's made out to be this guy who got caught up in the wrong crowd (and to each their own! You don't have to agree with my interpretation - that's part of the fun of it!). But, as far as I see it - the man is obsessive, manipulative, unstable, and he does not care who gets hurt so long as he gets his way. He volunteers the "lowest earners" as cannon fodder for Valentino's temper tantrum, for fuck's sake. His whole thing with Alastor, as funny as it is - HUGE red flags, there. This is not a good person.

Velvette - we don't know much about her history, but we do see her onscreen as impulsive, brazen, unapologetic, and bloodthirsty. She has a very "I do what I want, fuck you" attitude, which in and of itself is not necessarily evil, but combined with her involvement with Vox and Valentino - it spells trouble. I'm excited to see more of her next season.

And I mean, the show is set in hell, and these are Overlords. It's kind of a given that they're not gonna be saints. But every so often I see a take that seems to try to soften the sharp edges so to speak, and I just. Yeah, sure. They're people - that means they're complicated and complex. They can hurt, and they can also be hurt, and sometimes it's fun to explore that. But also, I think it's really fun to let them be evil and explore that, too.

A lot of people seem to be afraid to talk about or explore toxic/abusive/morally abhorrent characters. They seem to feel the need to either justify/explain away the bad things, remove them, or very explicitly state that "Character does bad things and so I hate everything about them and also anyone who likes anything about them deserves to rot in hell" (hyperbole here, kids). It's okay to write about characters doing bad things. It doesn't hurt anyone, and it doesn't mean that you approve of what they're doing. Also, it's okay to explore characters that are morally despicable and their complexity. Evil characters aren't always evil all the time. Bad people have feelings, emotions, likes, dislikes, passions, and hobbies. Bad people can be hurt and suffer and be likable. Exploring this in fiction is not bad.

I guess the point I'm trying to make here, in a roundabout way, is write whatever the fuck you want. It doesn't hurt anyone, and if they don't like it, they don't have to read it. They're fictional characters. Go crazy.

[katyahina]

Bloodborne characters motivations rundown (note to self + headcanons)

Okay, so, since Bloodborne characters are so multi-faceted and open to interpretation, I often lose track in all my thoughts about what IS their point in lore as people! So uh, yeah, consider more like a self-reference to stop getting lost in multiple ideas, but I thought I’ll post here too.

The Nerds

Choir (in general): Seek guidance of the Stars that is somewhat blind and sheltered, they are only allowed to see and learn what they ‘must’ see for the ‘greater design’ they are not allowed to question as lower lifeforms. The faith is “salvation”, for transcending the filth and idiocy that humanity supposedly is.

School of Mensis (in general): Pursue objective truth of reality, without any interpretation. They are ready to forsaken any earthly attachments and human morality just like Choir, but for knowledge and autonomy, not for specific deity’s plans about “betterment” of humanity. If anything, they do and always will NEED the ‘cattle’ for sacrifices, so advancing all humanity is not in their interest.

Micolash: Is ready for the most desperate measures and to break every possible human taboo to escape the clutches of how the world works (even beyond just the corruption under Moon Presence’s reign). Ironically, despite being the leader of Mensis, he fails to truly deliver its spirit in the end, as someone wagging his tail before Kos no better than what Choir people do for Ebrietas. He sees his fanaticism as justified though because Sea provides infinitely more vast and morally-unaligned knowledge than Stars.

Imposter Iosefka: Turns people into Celestial Emissaries, effectively connecting them with ‘Stars’/Moon that means sacrifice of humanity and autonomy of mind, as means to save them from becoming beasts instead. A true new course Choir member.

Willem: Seeks knowledge from the Stars all the same but is willing to retain autonomy and instead cooperates on his own terms. His interest is way more to advance the humanity than to forsaken or “overcome” it.

Yurie/Julie: Doesn’t catch up with the new course Choir and is in much more agreement with the way Willem puts the pursuit for enlightenment. She is unwilling to rip the bandage with Rom’s concealment and gives Micolash’s madness fair benefit of the doubt because muted effects of the Bloodmoon through the concealment might slowly guide humanity to passively evolving. Like a sound that you can’t hear but is still causing a number on your brain. But more importantly - she refuses to harm or doubt Rom no matter what.

Damian: He saw the true face of the power behind the Stars, something everyone in the Choir either never faced or are in denial about, and can confirm Julie is wrong; Mensis Ritual will only make humanity suffer with hunt and beasts slowly and forever, so it is better to reveal it so everyone suffers abruptly but for at least the chance to stop Flora, even if it means many people will turn into beasts and Rom gets “killed”.

Edgar: He changed his opinions having spent a lot of time near Micolash and being able to acknowledge how limited Choir was. In his new mindset Choir is even more insane than Mensis since despite doing just as many sins they also pretend they have “good cause” and refuse to accept some harsh truths going against what’s sacred for them. However, he doesn’t swear blind loyalty to Micolash either and agrees with Mensis teachings on his own terms, nor he fully ditches Choir teachings he did hold dear and keeps some things (like Rosmarinus for example). I’d call him the case of an NPC awakening, but he never was an NPC, he is an individualist and a logician to the core.

Caryll: Feels strongly about human language being extremely limited and far too many problems caused by miscommunication. His goal is not to listen to the guidance of Great Ones, but rather to use the inhuman noises as the medium of creating a perfect nearly telepathic language that doesn’t allow misinterpreting. Hence why some runes he popularised are contradictory, or even “heretical” (ie Vileblood’s Corruption). Freedom of speech, baby!

Patches: Very Mensis-leaning. Nightmare Apostles basically were beta-Mensis! They never had the bright idea of suppressing the will of self, so most went crazy. Patches keeps learning more things but as someone that kept his identity free, he has enough fun and self-indulgence with it as well.

(Yeah, he did TURN into a monster, this bit is from interview ( x ))

Archibald: Believes that everything has a good cause to exist and if something is possible to utilise or learn more from - no religious or moral restrictions must serve the basis for rejecting it. Naturally, that brought him going against both Healing Church’s prohibitions and Choir’s taboos, so only in Mensis he could feel at home.

The Hunters

Maria: Seeing what terrible things humans end up doing for more knowledge, and what terrible things they become, she refuses to compromise (unlike Rom). As a helper in Research Hall, she had faith in “salvation” from the Stars since she was last alive even before Choir or Mensis, so she’d nudge patients to pursue Stars rather than Curse or Sea.

Brador: “Teaching fools doesn’t make them smart, it makes them dangerous fools”. Not brainwashed by the Healing Church, but rather blackpilled: in his opinion, exposing the Healing Church will not solve the problems but rather let a NEW corrupt system appear on its ruins, and there is no guarantee the new one will be as easy to navigate in and control as this one. Humans will be humans, everything is on its place, ‘lesser’ people can be just a mass and the tools in the hands of ‘knowing’ people, all that. He’s blackpilled, dude.

Simon: Believes that knowing the truth about their history and ideals will ensure that humanity can learn and do better. Additionally, after having discovered Hunter’s Nightmare, he thinks if people learn of true nature of blood “healing” and hunt they will stop the system, ie less people will end up getting blood-drunk and sent in Hell.

Djura: Came to believe hating beasts is pointless as they are simply what is found in every human and everyone could end up like this too, but realises that if everyone stops hunting then beasts will just eat people and society will end... He respects autonomy of choice and approves of hunting those beasts that are loose and dangerous, just don’t touch beasts that Just Exists and can’t harm anyone anymore.

Valtr: Believes everyone possesses the germ of evil in them, it is just a matter of when it will show up. Although many years of this approach led him to believe “nothing deserves to live”, at the core of it is just the wish to hold the world together with a firm discipline. Humanity can’t become pure, but all evil could be stopped in its core, before a person actually COMMITS it.

Gascoigne: What Valtr thinks, but less deep and complex. Destructive, if anything. Why letting someone live long enough to unleash the evil within, if they could be killed before they DID anything?

Alfred: Restless too, but targets evil that already had manifested itself rather than some complex ideas of ‘preventing’. The downside is that whether who he deems evil actually hurt anyone or not is irrelevant for him; he hunts to exterminate and not to actually protect or contribute anything. Note him not being able to sleep while Annalise, a helpless woman that can’t even spread religion that’s heretical to his church, is as much as alive, and him being the only summon in Old Yharnam where beasts that can’t hurt people above reside.

Henryk: Continues hunting very aggressively, wishing to die in battle and not from old age or, god forbid, from turning into a beast and hunted. Lurks around Byrgenwerth, having heard that a ‘secret’ in there could unlock some HARD EXTRA BOSSES!!!1! if slaughtered. What would that mean for innocent citizens? Shhhruuuuug. This one is also not my own conclusion, but a thing lost in translation ( x ), as localization instead picked the ‘his parthnership with Gascoigne led to his tragically long life’.

Younger Madaras: Loyal to Valtr and his vision of evil (the Impurity) like a dog. He welcomed civilisation and humanity as a concept through Valtr’s lense.

Yamamura: Something about his tender heart didn’t agree with Valtr’s ways, however, he is too stubborn to admit “weakness” so even after having not seen the League in a long while he continues to try and seek Vermin even if it’s driving him crazy. (He has courage and pride and sense of justice, but isn’t ‘dead inside’ enough for the Mission.)

Gratia: Fights for everything good and against everything bad. Nuff said. She has extremely well-developed intuition for good intentions though, so it is not as easy to manipulate her to be a weapon in the hands of injustice and corruptions as it seems.

Henriett: Honors the ways of Old Hunters and deeply resents what Healing Church became and how it forgot Old Hunters ways. Seeks to dismantle the system and bring the Hunt in the way Gehrman intended it, however is willing to release Laurence and Ludwig from the Nightmare from mercy alone. General Hunter outfit that is just bootleg Old Hunters wear is popularised by her.

Gehrman: At the core, is up to hunt everything that is not a human (anymore). He hates Beasts and Kin and ‘monsters’ all the same, however tangled his fate with Moon Presence only to win time for Laurence and the Healing Church. Having an immortal-for-the-night Hunter could help to sustain the beasts while the “nerds” (see above) seek for the way to advance humanity for good. He was sealed back in time of Willem’s approach (advance humanity, not erase it), so it seemed like a fair sacrifice. He keeps his duty still, determined to not let any other person to suffer this fate.

Eileen (and all Hunters of Hunters): Mercy-killing blood drunk hunters before they turned into a beast. Since very first HoHs, no hunter wanted to live long enoug to lose their humanity anyways.

Bloody Crow of Cainhurst: Like guardians of Annalise do, he seeks Blood Dregs within blood-drunk hunters for Annalise, and job of Hunter of Hunters is a perfect access to them. He is long unable to reach Annalise though, and their telepathical blood bond has faded, so he is simply committed to this duty out of habit. When you consume a Blood Dreg it gives you +1 Insight though, so I think he consumes them himself, aspiring to eventually reach the Vileblood hivemind through Insight alone. Not an impossible task though; he can swear he senses ‘something significant’ stronger and stronger with every next one. Inspired by this confusing bit:

Logarius/Rogeriusz: Having killed the King taught him that Vileblood royals cannot just perish and their wrathful spirit is unstoppable, hence he can’t kill Annalise and instead has to keep her hostage. Partially it is also because of forming an amalgam with the King (think of when Aldrich ate Gwyndolin). At this point he is aware of the Healing Church’s schemes to nourish hostility against Vilebloods to justify breaking in and taking Annalise’s child of blood (and establishing enough control), but believes simple people will benefit more by counting on a sweet lie and a honourable legend.

Ludwig: Has faith in the things smarter than humans like every other character in this darn setting, that slowly grows into fanatism. Unlike average Choir fanatics though, he is in the direct contact with the Moon without the Stars ‘filter’ before it, but it grew on him slowly and insidious enough to not let him get revolted and horrified before it’s too late to have ANY critical thinking.

Forgotten Madman: He heard about Ludwig’s discovery and ran off from Choir while they were not looking with his butler/servant/escort. To meet the power BEHIND their Ebrietas! He tries to do so by emulating the conditions in which Ludwig met the Guidance - by setting an analogical sword in Arcane light and staring intensely. What a great plan.

Izzy: Sympathises with ideas of Fauna the Great One Beast and is willing to bring beasthood within men UP to start the new era of humanity, instead of repressing it (like Healing Church), exterminating it (like other hunters) or transcending it (like Choir or Mensis or earlier doctors). In her eyes, it is the true form of the humanity, not the flaw of it!

Josef: Average successor of Izzy’s ways, tries to discover the true power and meaning of beasthood in Loran where it first came from. By the way, there is enemy variant of him that even shares the face data and existed prior DLC, that IS called  イジーの後継 (Successor of Izzy, localized as Izzy’s Admirer). So yeah. lost fanboys.

Queen Killer: A veteran of Cainhurst crusade that was still aching for the noble battle and had his power and vigour useful for Mensis to reach Queen Yharnam. Was left in the dungeons to die though. He is just surviving now!

Antal: He can’t simply dismantle School of Mensis, of course, but doesn’t have the heart to just run away despite not being able to take it anymore, so he simply helps whatever prisoners he can to run away.

Yahar’gul hunter in Church’s cells: Was someone who shared Antal’s mindset but he did decide to run with Yamamura to help him, Simon and Gratia to get to the bottom of some secrets as someone who heard a thing of two in Mensis but was afraid to let Yamamura run alone.

Yahar’gul hunters in general: Were glad to serve School of Mensis after the “normie” (blood ministration oriented) Healing Church started the blame of foreigners and they got under the rug (note how 5 out of 7 Yahar’gul hunters we saw are not white). Currently are okay to stay there working with residing Pthumerians. They forgot the meaning of the hunt long ago and are too caught up in rituals and alike, kidnapping more victims for Pthumerians to make The One Reborn from. Just can’t go back to normal beasts hunting after being in contact with so much insanity, but do acknowledge that they are fighters rather than scholars.

Bone Ash Hunters: They know exactly what brought doom in the very nature of Pthumerians and humans and set themselves in fire to cleanse from the ‘sin’ everyone that has blood has. As Pthumerian lore bits suggest, they guard the Great Ones so nobody messes with them again.

Other people

Laurence: Genuinely cared for humanity and thought there was a good way to advance it on humans’ own terms, and not by listening to Great Ones like Willem offered. Improving ‘broken’ humanity by using ideas of humanity that IS ‘broken’ and therefore offers ‘broken’ ideas by design, huh... He is quite machiavellian and acknowledges many sacrifices and immoral decisions should be made for the greater purpose. What he had to do to accomplish his goals reflected the EXACT cruelty and hubris that he wanted to save the humanity FROM though, so his descent into beast increased upon realisation and despair.

Adeline: She has always felt broken and insignificant, within heavy depression, and blood ministration, and soon - Research Hall - were seen as her lucky ticket to become someone ‘meaningful’. This mindset helped her to wade through all horrors of the Sea with eagerness and joy, nothing the Sea could show her about nature of the world or her own mattered if she could learn how things REALLY were and overcome it.

Amelia/Emilia: Removed whatever successorship there might be after her but doesn’t have any idea on how to improve the situation or face the backlash by trying to be truthful with people, as someone raised within Church’s walls and mentality. I mean, who can she ask how to change Yharnam to the better? Remaining fanatics that won’t listen, or people who are already hostile to the church? So she just awaits her end and hopes when Healing Church crumbles with her death, things will somehow solve themselves.

Iosefka: Not as radical as her twin sister, however, now forever feels strongly about drawbacks of the “healing” blood, so she makes sure to clean it from red and leave only parts that actually heal. Not as effectively as ‘true’ blood, but it is a blood clean of what causes beasthood or Frenzy. She just wants to treat people with clean consciousness as a true good doctor, no matter how much time and effort it takes.

Blood Minister: He insists that any newcomer gets transfusion of the healing blood before entering Yharnam, as it is virtually impossible to survive without any at this rate. Someone with ‘clean’ blood would attract aggression of beasts even more than any other human, and everything Arcane would cause insanity from the slightest impact. It is like getting a vaccine before entering a heavily virus infested place.

Afflicted Beggar: He survives, and used to be a bit more restricted and reluctant about such a life. He became a beast not over any transfusion, but because of ancient curse of his Loran descendance having manifested. Naturally, he holds a FAT grudge against Hunters (and society in general) for throwing themselves to meet such fate when he had no choice. The life of having to lurk and hide and be lonely because nobody will try to help him with anything but the bullet in the head taught him to even ‘enjoy’ this existance, and hunt more humans than he actually needs to survive.

Annalise: Pthumerians were seeking to conceive children of blood to stay in touch with the cosmos and magic on different terms than those who care for celestial larvae, and Annalise’s reign is around where Vilebloods rediscovered this practice. She lost one such child because of Executioners but doesn’t mind trying again.

Adella: Only kills Arianna if she gave Hunter enough of her blood, and only kills hunter in this scenario after Bloodmoon. So, what Alfred is, but much more tame, only snapping after a person fails their “chance”. Just an average brainwashed church person. with the knife

The Great Ones

Rom: She hides horrors of the cosmos, however leaves small penetration through her barrier for those with enough Insight (ie ‘you can seek the truth if you are ready or want it, but people who are not prepared should be spared and do their thing’).

Kos: She used to guide the bulwark between mortal world and cosmos like what Rom does now but without any influence. However, she has a lot of humanity for a Great One and wished to care and love rather than use, hence the village of people that became fish/slugs that worshipped her, and a half-human infant. Her echo lived through Micolash and Rom to offer true life and wisdom to those that are strong enough to seek the Sea and to curse those that inadvertently follow the design of Moon Presence (so, the blood-drunk hunters). She is very weak and wounded though, and even those that overcome horrors of the Sea to hear her will essentially get the “Go away to your precious Moon! :/” from her (that’s essentially the Milkweed and alike runes). It is massive trust issues even for those that believe they want to learn her wisdom - again, a very human trait.

Wet Nurse: She was one of the crowlike beings that lived on the Sun and descended to Pthumerians to give them pyromancy to withstand the beasthood. Having seen that mortals never learned and repeated the same sin, she collects Messengers appearing after every night of the hunt to make them into heads of Winter Lanterns, to spread the message about true nature of the Hunt and the Moon. They transmit ‘Hunt the Great Ones’ + ‘Three Third Cords’ on high Insight level, alas, in most cases, people just explode in Frenzy spears. Frenzy is uncanny understanding of what is going on with the world, as well as reaction of the blood to crystallise into weapons. As someone who lost blood by descending, she also never was able to have a child of her own, so she took Mergo.

Flora / Moon Presence: Oh boy. Ohhhhh boooy... She has been a corrupt and controlling Great One from the start, but the one willing to grant protection in exchange for autonomy. Her unborn infant was killed and consumed right from her guts with her, and at this rate grief and wrath ensured she is more cruel and insidious, she is a bit like a beast herself, even. She hides her true nature and motives behind the image of Stars.

Oedon: They WERE Flora’s unborn child! They only exist as the voice in the blood, and are the reason why upon touch of arcane and alike it has properties to petrify or crystallise (check blood gems, especially circular, and Frenzy spears made of person’s blood). This IS the sin that Bone Ash Hunters burn themselves for. Oedon urges the Hunt and the bloodshed deep on unconscious level of humanity as means to reconnect with Flora. Frenzy spears are both the person realising they must hunt Flora and Oedon screaming ‘MOM!!!’. Because, again, this Great One’s true nature is bloodspill.

(I talked about Frenzy a bit more in this ( x ) post! Also, yeah, apparently, Oedon’s pronoun is ambigious in JP original. Translator Last Protagonist uses it and Aruki Mania walks around to not use any pronouns.)

Ebrietas: The only Celestial larvae that lived to adulthood, and the greatest (no pun intended) tool in the hands of Moon Presence, however largely unaware of her true purpose and the horror behind her. Whatever she did realise she’d deny or didn’t care about enough. She weeps for humanity and wishes it salvation and advancement, whereas Flora benefits from the cycle of sin, hunt and suffering. There is an awful hypocrisy and uncertainty that leaves unclear whether the (reigning) deities are upset by wars and madness of humanity or feed off of it, as Flora, Ebrietas and Oedon are united like Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Ebrietas’ affiliation got shaken though and some of her blood, too, became red and not grey, when Rom ascending and being used caused her Grinch heart moment.

(Internal names source: ( x ))

Amygdalae: Children of blood and antipodes of celestial children, offering not salvation but “forbidden” knowledge, they are demons when celestial children are angels. One must be strong willed and capable enough to trade with them though, or else they themselves will become sacrifices, as Amygdalae eat people to grow stronger.

Fauna: Opposed Flora’s controlling design from the very start and rooted for the mortals to discover all opportunities and mysteries of the world and their own nature. He currently exists as just an echo, only sustained by ones like Beast-Possessed Souls and undead Darkbeasts. Bolt is HIS magic though - symbol of a light that can be used to find one’s own path, rather than cosmic light like stars or moon that has it’s own design in plan. Fauna is not a fanmade name by the way, but appreared as cut content! ( x )

That’s all I think! Missed just a few characters, but I think I won’t get confused by them. I mean, Arianna survives the way she can, Sceptical Man is being a boomer, all that. xd Thank you if you read to this point though!

[dougielombax]

Today is world environment day.

Apparently.

My own country is beyond ecologically bankrupt unfortunately.

See this article here to prove my point.

Generations of parochial brainrot and Victorian obsession with neatness and tidiness combined with agricultural lobbying and borderline worship of pesticides.

(Destroying wetlands for turf because it’s “tradition”, turning the land into a lifeless chemically poisoned pasture.)

Combined with small minded idiocy borne of colonial brain damage.

It’s bred a sickening mentality in FAR too many people in Ireland.

Almost nobody gives a SHIT about the environment and it’s sickening to behold!

Even the so-called Green Party would rather implement useless, counterproductive measures for their own sake.

The Irish Green Party could learn a thing or too from their Scottish counterparts. But they won’t! They’re more concerned with greenwashing bullshit!

To say nothing of rampant greenwashing. The farming lobby and Green Party types would rather see the blame get shifted towards poor people and their families!

Sinn Fein are at least willing to recognise this but I think they need to be a bit more clear on such policies. I think they have a prime opportunity to adopt a kind of ecological socialist outlook. They sure as shit ought to.

With a proper understanding of ecology, none of this PETA or Greenpeace fanatical bullshit.

And so many people in my country are beyond UNEDUCATED on environmental and ecological matters to the point of being wilfully cruel!

To both nature and animals!

Almost as if out of spite.

To say nothing of the DUP’s deliberate, spiteful ignorance, denialism and INEPTITUDE concerning such matters. (But that’s because they’re stupid Christian fundamentalist cultists who want their stupid rapturepocalypse bullshit to happen, a glorified human sacrifice if nothing else!)

The ongoing Lough Neagh shitshow makes that much QUITE clear!

And anyone who voices their concern about such matters is belittled as a “treehugger” or whatever.

Keep that shit in the 1960s please!

And the agricultural lobbyists are making BILLIONS off of it!

It’s exhausting and I am BEYOND sick of it!

This BULLSHIT is gonna take FUCKING generations to undo! (This fact does NOT justify inaction!)

And these feral cud-chewing IDIOTS are gonna give us hell for it! Bleating and bitching every fucking step of the way!

And idiots like the Healey-Raes will bitch up a storm about it and their MORON voters will eat that SHIT up!

Because they’re FUCKING morons! Terminally stupid!

Sometimes I feel like the only person in Ireland who gives a shit about this and it makes me feel like I’m going insane!

Feel free to reblog.