#still need this tattooed on my body genuinely.. i should just do it

[peripaltepsy]

BEWARE OF "body mod advices" - they can be dangerous and LETHAL.

(this post was about a deactivated blog but extends to any possible future blog like it)

edit3 since he deactivated: Red told me in the DMs that he WILL be more careful about all this risk stuff, I believe he is going to do better. Im sure he's a good person and he also was extremely civil in the DMs. Since he's not here to defend himself anymore I'll gladly take his side and say that despite this mess, all Red wanted to do was indeed reduce harm and potentially save lives. Good luck on all your endeavors, Red, I wish you a beautiful and successful career and that you have a great positive impact in the atypical dysphoria community, both on and offline. I don't know how my post truly impacted you, I'm so sorry if you're feeling bad. You acted the best way you possibly could.

Second, if Red comes back, DO NOT HARASS HIM, let him be himself and don't let his past hold them down.

Third, all my points still stand for their deactivated blog and any potential body mod tips blogs in the future. Please everyone, take care, stay safe.

Past edit: DONT HARASS any possible blogs like hers, just REPORT and spread awareness, (also don't make the same mistakes as me: TALK TO THEM FIRST)

Past edit: minors please interact with this post, forget my bio for this one

Past edit: editing editing the post since I talked to Red and he isn't bait. I definitely should have talked to them in DMs first. I sincerely apologize. So sorry Red! To those reading, don't make the same mistake as me, ok? Always talk to people privately first, I genuinely fucked up bad. This mistake of assuming others intentions, can traumatize them. If I were in Red's shoes I'd be traumatized. So yeah, I fucked up bad.

Their intentions are genuine but my point still stands that its extremely dangerous and can't qualify as harm-reduction / end edit note

alright, I'm not transid/radqueer but you guys need to REPORT AND WARN OTHERS of these accounts as soon as they appear. Do not entertain them, no matter how desperate you are to transition. You can become a victim of dangerous charlatanism.

LONG POST AHEAD, VERY IMPORTANT NEVERTHELESS

Archive to what i'm about to post

Red claimed to be "a non-professional surgeon, planning on getting better with practice." Bad move!

Red has told me he's pursuing a medical degree and won't actually do non-qualified surgery.

.

Red: "The blog is centered around an idea of "extreme" body mods that I would like to explore further, [...] things like breaking and re-mending bones, creating new joints, replacing skin, etc."

My point: the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and your blog was unsafe.

.

To any possible counterarguments: "But they (people following/asking advice) know the risks!" That's victim-blaming. Red gave himself the responsibility to give harm-reducing advice, but he didn't do a good job.

"But I know the risks!" You can't possibly know the risks because Red doesn't know either or "kinda knows" but has not properly informed his audience, it didnt give sources, oversimplified their advice and failed to provide accurate information about risk. Or gave plain misinformation.

Again I'm not transid, I can't possibly imagine what you're going through in order to try anything at all to feel better, including trying experimental surgery not legally available or not researched at all. However, please please please do not become a victim of medical deceit or whatever tf it's called. Even if the blog owner tries their best to be reliable.

They might sound confident, but they do not know what they are saying, what they're telling others to do.

.

Ask: "How would I make my skin gray without tattoos?" (DO NOT SHAME THIS USER BTW)

Red: "[...] I assume you want permanent grey. To do this, it's pretty simple, although it'll take a lot of time. Basically, what you want to do is to constantly be exposed to lots of silver. Any product with silver in it like specific lotions and skin creams. also fish, milk, mushrooms, and whole grains tend to have silver in them! So tldr, consume lots of silver!"

STOP!!! DONT FOLLOW THIS ADVICE!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO SILVER!!! "Silver toxicity causes argyria. Silver toxicity occurs when too much silver is in your body." <- from a simple research on "too much silver in blood"

THE RESULT WILL BE ARGYRIA. EVEN IF YOU DO IT SLOWLY, YOU ARE BUILDING UP A HEAVY METAL IN YOUR BODY. THE GREY SKIN IS NOT PRETTY NOR WITHOUT GRUESOME SIDE SYMPTOMS.

Yall. Anything in excess will fuck up your body, including iron, vitamins, and silver.

To whoever asked Red, I don't know your mind, but I'm sure you'd love to live a happy life with grey skin! You'd love to have a body you're comfortable with and looks rad as hell! But you wouldn't be able to enjoy it if you're deeply sick with ARGYRIA, WHICH IS WHAT RED'S ADVICE WILL GIVE YOU!

.

Ask: "How do I get darker skin without going too dark? I’m pale and burn easily, I just want a color similar to Lin Manuel Miranda" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: [...] "expose yourself to the sun more! As you do this, you'll get tan which will protect you from future burns and make your skin slightly darker, do this enough and you can engineer your skin to be as dark as you want!"

THATS MISINFORMATION! Yes you may tan to get darker (Lin's tone may or may not be achievable to you) but one: it's not permanent unless you're constantly going out; two: SKIN CANCER!!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO THE SUN!!!! USE SUNSCREEN!!

TO ANYONE SEEKING A MUCH DARKER TONE: YOU CAN'T "GO AS DARK AS YOU WANT TO" BY TANNING. Just look at people who have lived their whole lives outdoors like farmers! White people can't tan to black! There's a limit to how tan you may get! Are you seriously gonna risk skin cancer for an impossible thing???

.

Red: "Self amputation is really dangerous! You should learn how to use a tourniquet, that way, you can stop the bleeding! [...]" WHERE ARE YOU GETTING YOUR SOURCES, RED?

If anyone reading this is seriously thinking of amputating themselves, and will not change their minds no matter what, please just have someone immediately drive you to the hospital. I do not support such operation and you can still die or get horribly sick even with your best precautions, but you better receive actual medical attention and stay alive rather than trying to heal it yourself. Because what you'll most likely get from following Red's advice is DEATH FROM BLOOD LOSS. Again, if you absolutely cannot get rid of this dysphoria with therapy, or manage it at least, or have a doctor do it for you, I still would NEVER suggest you do it yourself, but IF you end up doing that then at least please go straight to the hospital instead of trying to heal it yourself.

.

Red: "do not try and break your own bones to make modifications! [...] Get another person (Like myself) to help you with the bone breakage instead."

NO ONE KNOWS WTF THEY'RE DOING. YOUR FRIEND DOESN'T. RED DOESN'T (as they advertised in the post). NO ONE IS GOING TO GET MODIFICATIONS LIKE THIS. NO ONE IS GOING TO BE HAPPY. EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE EITHER IN PAIN, RISK OF HORRIBLE INJURIES OR TROUBLE WITH THE LAW. FUCKING AROUND = GUARANTEED BOTCHED OPERATION.

Also, now that Red has clarified she won't perform surgery until having an actual degree, you can't really go to her XD

.

Red: "Some advice for surgery [...] This one's important, make sure your patient is strapped down and properly sedated, if they move, even slightly, you risk hitting a vital artery or organ, if you do hit an artery, don't panic, this is why you learned how to use a tourniquet! if you hit a vital organ though, odds are you won't know how to fix that, so be extra careful with abdomen and face surgery!"

Thats still promoting medical malpractice, mutilating and potentially killing friends, dangerously downplaying surgery so much, this is not harm-reduction

.

Ask: "I want to be blind in one eye, but more-so in the sense of extreme but not total vision loss. I want to do something permanent in the future!" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: Well, a simple fix to your problem is just get some calcium hydroxide in your eye and wash it out a few minutes later, this should lead to permanent, extreme (but not total) vision loss in that eye. Keep it in too long and it can cause total vision loss so be careful!

Ok so, it's great that you're trying to come up with alternative ways for users not to kill themselves by gouging their eyes out, but you've still failed to give them the full picture

From a quick search "calcium hydroxide in the eyes": Exposure to the skin can produce burns, painful irritation and necrosis, and exposure to the eyes may cause severe pain and vision loss that can be temporary or permanent. If calcium hydroxide is exposed to the skin, contaminated clothing should be removed, excess amounts of the chemical should be wiped off and the affected skin should be flushed repeatedly with water. Victims of calcium hydroxide exposure to the eyes should flush their eyes with water continuously for the first 15 minutes, but all cases of external exposure should receive immediate medical care. Inhaling calcium hydroxide through the nose or mouth can also cause immediate, painful and potentially life-threatening complications. Throat and nasal passages may become painful and swollen, and the swelling may restrict airways, making breathing difficult or impossible. If the calcium hydroxide particles are carried all the way to the lungs, this may further complicate breathing. Victims of this type of exposure should be taken immediately to a fresh air environment, and emergency services should be contacted right away. Administration of oxygen and emergency respiratory assistance may be required.

.

Red (answering an ask): "the question shouldn't be what DO people replace their skin with, it should be what CAN they, after all, just because it's never been practiced or very rarely practiced doesn't mean it's bad or impossible! Of course, my personal favorite skin substitutes are rubber and red velvet, I am also a big fan of stainless steel."

(Don't promote such an operation). THIS OPERATION IS BAD AND IMPOSSIBLE TO SUCCEED. SKIN CAN ONLY BE REPLACED WITH SKIN. SKIN IS A LIVING ORGAN. ANY OTHER SUBSTITUTE WILL CAUSE YOU TO LOSE BODY PARTS OR DIE.

YOU KNOW HOW PEOPLE WITH TRANSPLANTS NEED LIFE-LONG MEDICAL ATTENTION SO THEIR BODY DOESN'T REJECT IT? HOW TF WILL YOU DO THIS WITH FUCKING RED VELVET?

YOU WILL FUCK UP YOUR BODY'S IMMUNE SYSTEM A THOUSAND DIFFERENT WAYS.

ANYWAYS. CROSSTAGGING FOR REACH. PLEASE EVERYONE REBLOG. THIS IS SERIOUS SHIT.

[francisforever2014]

good bones by maggie smith saturday . give it up for good bones by maggie smith saturday

[folkookie97]

❝ every side of you ❞ — jjk

— SUMMARY: ❝Jungkook is a devil when he's fucking you and an angel when he's out of bed. You need his aftercare just like you need his tattooed arm choking you so hard.❞

— PAIRING: dom!jungkook x sub!reader

— TYPE: smut, fluff | non-idol!au, established relationship

— WORD COUNT: 1,201

— WARNINGS: PWP, curse words, rough sex, vaginal sex, choking, spanking, squirting, light dom/sub, degradation kink, mention of safeword, creampie, brief loss of consciousness, aftercare, pet names, dirty talk, unprotected sex, tattooed!jungkook

— NOTES: I'm definitely still freaking out over Jungkook's shirtless live on Weverse.

— RELEASE DATE: July 30, 2023

— CROSSPOSTING: ao3

Jungkook is a rough sex lover. You know better than anyone why this man is the biggest stereotype of a character written by an erotic romance author. No matter the time or place. Jungkook only wants his cock to be inside you.

The sound of your moans is like angelic melodies to him. The expression on your face when you reach the orgasm is more beautiful than any Renaissance art he could admire in a museum.

Jungkook loves having sex with you. Every day and every hour that you both could. Definitely.

For those reasons, you weren't surprised when Jungkook woke you up in the middle of the night for a quick fuck.

Or at least that was the initial idea. But just as he was addicted to feeling your pussy squeezing his cock during each thrust by his hips, you were addicted to the genuine pleasure his tattooed arm gave you during choking play.

“You're a whore, aren't you? You love being choked by me. You love when I don't let you breathe." He laughed listening to the sound of his balls hitting the skin of your ass as the speed of his thrusts increased. "Like it? How do you feel you shitty little bitch?

“So good, Kookie… I love it. You're perfect for me."

Your confession might seem adorable sometimes but Jungkook couldn't tolerate softness within sex. When he pressed his forearm to your throat hard enough to nearly hurt you, you muttered a strangled apology, aware that your mistake had pissed him off.

“That's not what I fucking asked." Jungkook slapped your ass with his free hand, the sight of your swaying ass cheeks causing spasms in his body. Holy shit, he really loved fucking you in doggy style. “I'm asking if you like being treated like the stupid bitch you are. You're my cock slut? My needy and dumb slut?

"Yes!" You moaned louder, the emotion of being degraded taking you closer to an overwhelming orgasm. "Please! Please continue! I'm gonna cum!"

"Such a greedy little bitch..." That snarky laugh came back, this time whispered close to your ear. He bit your right earlobe. "Wanna cum on my cock?"

Each thrust was like a walk in paradise. Or maybe a dance with the devil.

Jungkook understood about your body as well as a conductor could conduct an orchestra. It was no different for you. Your knowledge about the whole essence of his body covered in tattoos was something you acquired very well during all those years together.

So you knew why his hand left the soft piece of your ass to squeeze circles on your clit. He was gonna cum at any moment. He wanted you to cum too. You should cum around him, for him, with him.

"Such a fucking good pussy, holy shit!"

It was impossible for Jungkook not to feel numb from the feel of her pussy squeezing him, nearly crushing his cock because of deep thrusts.

It was like he wanted to break you in half. Hips colliding, his tattooed arm suffocating you, deft fingers rubbing your clit so hard and desperately.

You weren't shocked when an intense burning started at the bottom of your belly. It wasn't the first time that this would happen in a fuck with Jeon Jungkook.

However before you could warn him ahead of time, Jungkook was already increasing not only the speed of his fingers but also the pressure exerted on your clit.

There wasn't much you could do but scream when an orgasm flashed through your mind and a sizable amount of clear liquid squirted from your pussy onto the sheets.

You could hear your name escaping Jungkook's lips in a guttural moan and you could also feel all of his cum filling you in dense charges.

Swearing uttered by your boyfriend and the heat of his cum were the last things you were able to witness before your body gave out from exhaustion and you crashed into the wet bed sheets as you lost consciousness.

Jungkook was always a great boyfriend for you, at these times it was like he was written by Jane Austen. Romanticism was one of the characteristics you most admired about him. He was so soft and affectionate when you two was out of the bedroom.

The aftercare was essential for both of you. It didn't matter what he said or did to you in bed, after sex he became the classic "clingy boyfriend", always worried about you, your body and your mind.

"Are you okay babydoll? You scared me." It was the first thing your brain picked up on when you shook off the blackness of the fainting and opened your eyes.

The second thing you picked up was the fact that Jungkook was lying next to you. Both of you still naked and covered by a different sheet than the one on the bed when you have a squirt.

You might also notice that your skin wasn't as sticky as it used to be. Perhaps throwing it on the side table indicated why.

“I'm already fine, Kookie. Just relax." You failed to smile because you hissed in pain as soon as Jungkook's hands tried to pull you into a hug.

The slight discomfort in your body was enough to make Jungkook's overprotective personality worse; wide eyes and a devastated expression on his face.

"I hurt you babydoll? Why didn't you ask me to stop?"

“You didn't hurt me." It wasn't entirely true. Your skin was already lightly bruised, your throat was burning from the choking and your clit was still sensitive and painful due to the strong stimuli of Jungkook's fingers. However you also loved rough sex and therefore insisted on ensuring how satisfied you were after the situation. “It was perfect, angel. I promise. You know I would use the safeword if we had to."

Jungkook agreed as he hoped in his thoughts that this day would never come. He knew he would hate himself for the rest of his life if he ever hurt you.

“You were perfect babydoll. You're always perfect."

Circling your fingers over the patterns on his arm, you allowed yourself to smile at the praise. It was so sweet and kind. A complete opposite of the Jungkook you witnessed in bed.

You loved both sides of him.

"You like when I wet the sheets and my body slumped onto the mattress like a real doll?"

His cheeks turned red and your playful smile widened noticing his embarrassment.

"Shut up." He teased you in light chuckles. "I really got a worried after cumming seeing you fainting underneath me."

"I bet you got horny first." You teased again and this time he laughed louder rolling his eyes and nodding his head in affirmation.

"Fine! It was really a little hot. But I swear I still was worried."

This time you were the one who nodded.

Cuddling the heat of his chest, your eyelids began to close and the post-sex drowsiness expanded in intensity with each passing second.

“I love you my babydoll. You're perfect."

You chuckled and sealed your lips to the bare skin of his shoulder.

“Love you too, Kookie. Every side of you."

[lasciviouspoison]

my first full length smut fic! this shit took weeks to edit ngl, but it was worth it. with that being said, there are probably still some mistakes so excuse those, lol. tw: breeding, eren calls himself “daddy”, word “mommy” is used, reader and eren are extremely (heavy emphasis on extremely) frustrated. not a tw, but like i always say, this is for my chubby black women, but all are free to read <3

eren has loved you for an extremely long time. he’s spoiled u, fed u, he’s even dressed you head to toe while you were sick.

yet, all of this spoiling and caring for u, does not warrant your brattiness right now.

he’s been studying tirelessly for his midterm for about 2 weeks now, finally on his last day of review before his test in a couple of days. yet, he can’t seem to focus because you keep coming in and out of your shared study every three seconds.

“‘ren, where are the extra washcloths?”

he looks up from his textbook, glasses falling off his nose a bit. you’re even dressed like a brat, skimpy little white tank top and baby pink panties. it makes his head hurt worse than the passage he’s read over 4 times now.

“there’s no way you’re asking me where fucking washcloths are right now. there’s no way.” he says with some bite to his voice. he just needs to finish these last two pages and the longer it takes him, the more it kills him.

your arms cross over your chest, pushing your bra-less chest up and exposing a bit of your chubby stomach. “does it look like i’m joking with you? where are they?”

he clenches his jaw and in a very clipped tone, he responds that they’re under the sink. you scoff slightly and walk out, making an effort to slam the door a bit harder than necessary.

he sits back in his chair and throws off his glasses, big tattooed hands wiping his face. eren knows he’s been neglecting you, and it’s killing him just as much as you. he’s tired of coming home from class too tired to touch you. he’s tired of you having to tell him to go lay down after his head rocked one too many times over his dinner plate.

he’s tired, but he’s not gonna let you act like a bitch just to get what you want. simply because it’s fucking working.

he pushes up from his desk and walks out of the study. he hears the bathroom cabinets opening, so he does everything but sprint to get there.

you peer over your shoulder at him and roll your eyes, “they weren’t under the sink. in fact, they’re all dirty cause, you know, you act like you can’t help with laundry anymore-“

erens grabbed you by the nape of your neck and brought your body close to his. you can hear his semi-heavy breathing despite still being bent over, which caused your heart to race a little. although you knew eren would never hurt you, it doesn’t mean that his pent up energy won’t go to waste.

“a couple things: one, don’t talk to me like i’m a fucking child. two, i do still help with laundry, there’s a whole basket full of folded shirts sitting on the bedroom floor that i didn’t get the chance to put away. and finally, you that cock hungry, or are you genuinely mad at me?” he finishes with a finger running up your spine, back arching at the feeling. he knows this rills you up, which is perfect for him. you don’t get to frustrate him and remain unscathed.

your eyes widened a bit, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to stop eren’s hand from moving. you could feel just how hard he was and it made you think that he almost had it worse than you. however, that doesn’t mean your just gonna lay here and take it.

“get the fuck off me eren” you said through tight lips. his hands now steadily making their way under your top, with you making no advances to stop him.

he bent down towards your ear as his body almost covers yours entirely, with his fingers now gently pulling at your nipples.. “you know what’s funny? you can act mad at me all you want, but this pretty pussy is never ever mad at me. maybe i should gag you and let her do the talking, at least she’s not a fucking liar” at this point, eren’s hands feel like hot coals against your body. while they slowly make their descent back down your body, you can feel your resolve slowly melting away under his touch.

before you could reply, his fingers begin to softly move along your covered slit, causing your breath to hitch. you push your hips back a little and eren gives you a breathless laugh in return.

“i know i’ve neglected you pretty baby. daddy’s really sorry, just let me make it up to you. i promise, you can have me all night if you just tell me what you really want”. sometimes, you swore that you could hear the smirk on eren’s lips.

you shook your head no and felt a soft slap to your pussy. you wanted to scream at him and tell him just how badly you missed him, but your mouth refused to open. you bit your lip once he began touching you again, attempting to coax a confession from your pretty lips.

you felt him bend over once again, this time to place small kisses behind your ear, kisses that started to travel down your neck and onto your back. the entirety of his ministrations were torture, but it was when he stopped kissing you and replaced his lips with his tongue to lick a stripe up your back that you really wanted to cave.

eren’s middle finger finally found your bare clit, the initial contact causing you to jump hard against his body. small whimpers leaving your lips as you tried to maneuver on his fingers before he stilled your movements.

“m’not doin anything more till you tell me the truth. what do you want from me baby? tell me and i’ll give it you ya”.

you try to grind against his fingers once again before a hard smack to your ass forces you to stop. his grip on your hips tightening, letting u know that he’s really gonna deprive you until you speak.

“want you to touch me ren! wan’ you to fuck me so fucking bad!” you finally scream out.

every gives you a small chuckle before his middle and index finger burry themselves into your cunt. his body almost shakes at warmth you provide. blood rushing straight to his dick, making him indescribably hard.

“that’s it baby, that’s all i wanted to hear.” he sounds breathless, almost like he’s the one that’s been getting teased.

he’s pumping his fingers in and out of you, a small squelching sound coming from your sopping pussy. your grip on the cold marble counter top has your knuckles turning white. at this point, you’re so desperate for more that your meeting his fingers half way.

with tears threatening to run down your chubby cheeks, you make pleas for more. “ren please, please gimme more. i’ll be good i promise!”

he feels so bad. you’ve never acted like this, even when the two of you were still forced to live separately on campus. the desperation in your voice is surprising him just as much as it’s surprising you.

because he knows you like it when he fucks you with his hair down, he pulls his hair from his already loosening bun and all but rips his sweats off. dick hitting his bare stomach with a heavy thud.

he takes his fingers out of you and rips those pretty pink panties off, he makes a mental note to buy you another pair.

he rubs himself between your sticky folds till his cock is shiny, hitting your clit a couple of times in the process, drawing more whines from you. all he can do is look down in awe. it’s amazing to him just how wet you get from just a couple of fingers, but who can blame u? his dick’s been throbbing for four days straight.

he finally anchors himself and spits, emitting a soft puh before he smiles. you’re such a mess underneath him and he can’t wait to make it even worse. he finally starts to push in, but your tight little cunny won’t let him in no matter how gentle he tries to be.

“lemme in baby… please lemme in” his voice is so strained it’s making u gush even more.

“i’m tryin!” you say with a pout, tears running down your face.

eren knows you’ve always been big on eye contact when the two of you fuck, it’s almost necessary… so, he hooks his fingers into the side of your mouth and forces your head to lift. finally you were able to see that tattooed chest and pretty face, and he was able to see those pretty eyes and beautiful tear stained face.

almost immediately do you loosen up and he accidentally on purpose pushes all the way in, causing the both of you to moan loudly.

“there you go baby, take it for me ya spoiled fuckin brat”. his hands have found purchase on the fatness of your hips, his grip so tight that you think he’ll bruise you. not that you’ve ever cared.

“fuckfuckfuck” is all you can say as you watch his facial expressions through the mirror. his hair is down and there’s tiny beads of sweat rolling down his forehead. he’s gone slack jawed while stroking you, a relaxed expression gracing his pretty face. no matter how many times he’s buried himself in your warm walls, he’s never gotten used to how good u feel. once his green eyes make contact with yours and that smirk graces his face, it makes u realize just how in control he is no matter how gentle he may look.

“squeezin’ me so tight baby.. u miss me that much?” he says with a breathless laugh, voice dripping with sarcasm. the both of you know that going this long without touch was both odd and frustrating. it caused the both of you to miss each other equally, hence why this could be categorized as some of the best sex you’ve ever had.

at this point, he knows you’re gonna cum soon, he can feel your walls pulsing and eren feels like his dick is gonna pop.

“g’nna cum rennie, g’nna make a mess on yo- ugh fuck!” your little hands balling into fists as he hits that spongey spot in you. you can hear just how hard he’s thrusting into you, each stroke sounding more sticky than the last. it’s making your eyes cross and toes curl.

your convinced he’s gonna kill you with that horse dick of his one day.

“let it out baby, i’ll clean it up the mess, wanna feel you cum on me.” even he’s getting whiny now, so it’s only a matter of time before you-

“-ohmygod eren!” you cum so hard that your body’s shaking and your knees are buckling. thankfully, eren’s always there to catch you.

despite chasing his own nut, he desperately wants to see you ride out your orgasm. he’s so desperate that he’s picking you up by your hips, forcing you to do small circles against his waist cause he knows it drives you crazy.

however, it doesn’t take long before he’s digging deep into you again, the force of his thrusts causing your head to bounce a little harder than intended.

“god i’m gonna cum so hard in this pretty pussy. i’m so fucking sorry i neglected you baby.. never again, god i’ll never do it again baby i promise. gonna fill you up okay? awe, you like the sound of that yeah? make you the prettiest mommy for me. promise i’ll take care of you forever. god i love you”. he’s rambling and his voice is getting rough. it’s only a matter of time before he cums.

after finding some strength, you finally look back and smile at him and that’s all it takes for eren to cum. his face screws up and his warm hands slide up your back to make you arch a little deeper. you wish you could run your fingers through his hair so badly, but you couldn’t ask for a better view of your beautiful boyfriend.

after a few moments of silence, eren finally comes down from his high with a big huff of air. gently, he spins you around so you face him. he moves your curls from out of your eyes and gives you a slow kiss on the lips, hands resting gently on your chubby, tear stained cheeks.

after a few moments of silence, he starts to speak, “i meant what i said. i’m sorry i left you alone for so long baby. i just gotta pass this test.” his eyes full of remorse.

“i know eren, i just wanted some attention… it’s really easy to miss you, even if we live together”. small smiles find both of your faces and eren finally pulls out to run the two of you a warm bath.

he strips you out of your tank top and carries you over to the tub, where he holds you tightly.

after some comfortable silence, you can’t help but look over your shoulder and ask the question that’s been plaguing your mind, “you really wanna get me pregnant?”

he looks towards the ceiling and let’s out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “i mean, eventually yes. right now? fuck no”

the two of you fell into laughter while the smell of lavender filled your noses and achy bones were finally allowed to rest.

[mondaysoct]

underneath tattooed skin.

Simon Riley x Fem!Reader

—content warning: angst, comfort, and fluff | simon found wounds from the past on her body.

—word count: 2.2k

His eyes had been glued to you since they saw your scars. He looks like he wants to explode.

His eyes landed on your chest. They found the scar that was located on your breast. It was thin and long. He had no idea what had given you this scar, but his chest burned with pain for you.

He thought with genuine concern, the idea of this memory of your past pain haunting you made his blood boil and he start to be pissed about all of this. He wanted to remove everything that could remind you of that nightmare, he wanted you to be free of all your painful memories. To him this body of yours had been tainted, your beautiful skin should've never been touched in such the way that it was touched.

How had you gotten these scars? The one on your neck looked painful, the one on your chest was long, as if a huge blade had caused it. You had three scars on your body, and he wanted to know about every one of them.

But you weren’t willing to say a word about these scars even though you’ve known him for so long. It was frustrating because it made him hate the scar even more than originally.

Why you never told him about them?

Why are you so damn secret about them?

What kind of animal would do such a thing?

He looked at the tattoo as if studying it, he could feel the anger boiling in his blood, his entire demeanor changed.

“Simon.”

Damn it, don’t call me by my name! Not now!

The fact that you were able to make him go this soft was infuriating to him, you had a certain effect on him that he couldn’t understand.

This should make you angry, the idea of some bastard touching this body of yours should make you mad. Why are you allowing yourself to be soft? Think, think about how this body was tainted. Think about the past. Think about that bastard.

“I don't want you to be so overthinking over the mark.”

God dammit, damn you!

That bastard had touched your body, had probably hurt you, maybe even tried to do worse to you. You should be mad, mad and ready to kill the bastard that scarred you.

You really aren’t mad about it…

How could he not be furious for someone touching you in such a way?

The mark was a reminder of what your body had gone through. He was worried for you because the scar seemed big, and it covered up a decent sized section on your chest. The mark had to go. He couldn’t just let it be here staring at him with a constant reminder to the man who did this to you. The man who tarnished the perfection of your skin. He did want to comfort you, for this body to be safe with him, not scarred by the horrible memory of your violation.

The bastard who touched your skin.

The bastard who took something from you.

The bastard who scarred your body.

“Everything is over, Simon. I don’t feel the pain anymore.”

Yes, everything was over, but the memories have been ingrained into your skin, you’ve been scarred for life because of some dickhead who did something that should’ve never been done to you. Why did he have to scar your beautiful skin?

He couldn’t stand the sight of that stupid mark on such a perfect body. He wanted it removed. The scar still remained. It remained like a mark of a disgrace, it was a permanent reminder of the violation that had happened to you, and it would always be a reminder of that horrible time.

That bastard didn’t deserve to leave a permanent mark on something so beautiful as this body of yours. You deserved so much more than this. Your body needed to be free of this, it needed to be pure.

“Your skin was violated. Do you not see that? Do you not hate it?”

“I do, but there's nothing I can do about it. It is become permanent, but I already covered up with tattoo and it's enough for me.”

No, it’s not. Your body has been permanently scarred, to have this reminder every single morning when you wake up, having to see it every time you shower. The reminder that this is what was forced upon you. This is not right.

“How can you be okay with something that’s on your body permanently? One day if we had children, they would see the tattoo and they’d ask what it was for, and you’d have to lie.” He spoke.

“The tattoo doesn’t change the fact that this beautiful skin of yours was tainted.” He hated how nonchalant you acted about it. You treated this as if it was something minor, it was NOT. Whoever did this to you should be buried sixty feet under the ground.

“I know everyone who close to me can see clearly the mark, but I already leaving the trauma behind, this is a long time ago.” You want to argue with him, to further prove your point.

The fact this happened long ago made him even more pissed. Just how long had it been since that jackass had scarred you? How long did you suffer from this?

“How could you expect a trauma like this to just disappear?” He asked, his voice had just become louder, this wasn’t the same tender Simon as before.

He was mad and he was angry, and he was so sick of just standing on the sidelines when it came to the pain you went through. “This beautiful skin of yours was violated and you’re just supposed to accept it?”

“If you keep talking about this, you only bring me back to something I've been forget, Simon.”

He shut his mouth immediately.

He knew that you were right, but the idea that you were able to forget this kind of trauma annoyed him, he didn’t agree with this. How can someone like you just forget what they’ve gone through? And he wanted to be mad at you for this, but the reality was he just couldn’t do it. Because he cared for you that much that it wasn’t in him to get mad at you for this. “I don’t understand how you could just forget such trauma. You just seem…. different.”

“Alright, I didn't forget it completely, the day this all was happened keep coming back to my dream. But I don't know what I have to do. All I can think...” You remain silent for a second to take a deep breath and try to ease the hurt feeling in the throat as you try to talk.

“All I can think, maybe I should live with this nightmare for the rest of my life.” You whisper. Your eyes full of sorrow.

“No, no no no no no.” His voice was almost desperate. It couldn’t be, you deserve so much more than just living with this nightmare. You deserved the world. He was desperate to keep you from thinking like that, this shouldn’t be the rest of your life, the rest of your life should be a happy one.

“You can’t do that, please don’t. I won’t let you.”

How could he let you live with that kind of mindset? His heart was pounding just by the idea of you considering that. He could see the hurt and pain in your eyes, he was desperate to make that go away. That man should pay for his sins. “I will find a way to get rid of this, I promise you.”

In a long silence you finally speak up. “I didn't know you have to be this far. You're not supposed to see my body. I thought you just kiss me.”

Oh my god, is this what she thinks of me?

There was a sudden rush and he pulled you close to his body, so your bodies were pressed against each other. Your bodies were touching but his eyes were staring at the tattoo on your body and the memory behind it.

You think that I only wanted to kiss you?

“I wanted more.” He murmured, “I want you.”

You wince and turns away from him, he can see the deep breath you force yourself to take in order to remain calm. “But you have to accept me.”

“I have already accepted you.” He murmured, “But it’s you who is not accepting me.”

He was referring to how you still believed that you’re nothing more than someone he just simply uses for physical pleasure. His tone was soft, but his eyes were telling a completely different story, he was frustrated by how you didn’t believe that he desired you deeply.

“I do accept you.” You whispered as you tried to convince him by looking into his eyes.

“No, you don't. You think I only want to use you for some physical pleasure. You think I don't want more than that, that I don't want the person behind the body I use.” The frustration was back, and he wasn’t even trying to hide it. He was sick of this entire damn situation, and he was at the edge.

“But goddamn you still don’t believe me. I know you can’t change your past. I can’t change mine either but that doesn’t mean I’m still going to let it dictate who I am and who I become. I am tired of these pointless conversations, I like what we have, hell I love it. I love who you are, so why can't you trust me when I said I want more from you?”

“I trust you, Simon.”

All these sweet words about trust. Simon was already at his boiling point and now he was feeling every single emotion that was possible.

Frustration? Check.

Desire? Check.

Love? Check check check check.

His body was practically shaking. “Just say you believe me already. Say you trust me, that you trust me enough to believe that I want you.”

“I can see it through your eyes, you succeed convincing me by your proof from your words and your action. I trust you, and I know that you want me not just for physical need and thank you for that.”

The fact that you actually believed him and trusted him made him so damn satisfied, it was like the burden which had been on his shoulders for so long was finally gone.

The past doesn’t matter, what matter is now, right?

His heart was pumping like he had just run a marathon, you had completely broken him. There was nothing more to hide, his desire, his frustration, and his love for you was clear to see in his eyes.

He was about to kiss you, but he stopped himself.

“Say it.”

“I love you, trust you, believe you, and I want you too.” You grab his hand, and your fingers intertwined with his hands as you say this.

Before he even realized what he was doing he pulled you into a passionate kiss, a kiss that held no anger from his side, it was a kiss that was purely born from his undying desire for you. His body was now shaking in a way that he couldn’t even describe, he felt nervous about what he was about to do but he knew it needed to be done.

He grabbed your face, his hands framing it and he leaned in close enough for to feel his breath against your skin. He kissed you once more, this kiss wasn’t as playful as the other one. It was passionate, it was the type of kiss that signified that their relationship had evolved into something more. He was desperate, he wanted more, and he was going to take it.

He leaned back against the wall so he could see your whole body, each of them scars were still noticeable to him, his eyes scanning over every inch of you as if he was seeing a work of art. He wanted to see every single inch of your body. He saw that your body was just as he imagined it to be, perfect. He was lost in your beauty. Your body was so damn gorgeous, your skin was smooth and pale, your body was perfect and flawless.

He pulled you into his arms again and he ran his fingers across the scar softly like he did before. His hand gently rose to the scar on your breast, and he rubbed it softly. He knew that this is what you didn’t want him to see, but he wanted you to know that your body, scars or no scars, did not make him love you less. He was so proud of the fact that he had seen your body, every part of your body. The scars that you had no control over didn’t change how he viewed you.

There was nothing better than this moment, he wasn’t afraid to touch your skin because he loved it, all of it. The scars and the smooth delicate skin you had, even the tattoos that were on your flesh made him more obsessed with you. You’re so beautiful in every way.

Thanks for reading ♡

[imightgetbetter]

heart and soul

please be very kind with this one. i've been watching so many interviews where matty talks about mental health and i had a bit of a rough go myself today and i just thought about how this would go, and so, here we are. i hope you're taking care of yourself today.

Gentle fingers dance along your back, kneading into your skin every so often as you sink into his warmth, your fingers tracing over the tattoo inked across his chest. His lips are tucked into your hair, and the air is still, eerily quiet for a night when you’re home and haven’t had much to do. Usually, you would be in the kitchen, a playlist on the speaker and one of you cooking dinner, a bottle of your favorite wine cracked open to share. Nights like those, they were much more than nights like these, but at this moment, you genuinely wished you had the energy to be downstairs.

“Are you hungry?” Matty asks quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. He lifts his head slightly to look at you, nodding to himself when you shake your head. “Have you eaten at all today, darling? You have to eat. I need you to eat.”

“Not hungry,” you murmur, pulling the blanket over your shoulder and tucking yourself further into hiding. His other hand is dragging along your arm, rubbing over your skin gently. “You can go eat if you’re hungry.”

“Not going without you, darling. Think that you know me better than that by now.”

He’s right, you do know him better than that. Matty has always reacted the same on days like this, days where your anxiety is more than anyone should bear, and you can’t physically get yourself out of bed. In your younger years, Matty would come over and spend the day in your room with you, distracting you with stories of band rehearsal and writing and how he couldn’t wait for the day your stories about him could be read by him. He always argued that you heard songs much too soon, but he couldn’t read your writing. He never meant it maliciously, and the excitement you could see behind his eyes always kept you writing. In the years you lived thousands of miles apart, there would be a text every morning, ‘Good? Bad?’ He would nervously wait for your reply, waiting to see if he would be clinging to his phone all day or would give you space to get your work done. And in the last several years, where you two were rarely apart, he’s learned exactly what you crave on days like this, the way to break you out of it.

“Going to take a shower when this episode is done. Okay?”

Knowing that it’s not a question, you nod quietly, swallowing thickly and trying to work up the courage to speak, to say anything. Your voice feels heavy against your throat, like if you utter the tiniest word, you’ll become sick. “Okay.”

“I missed you all day,” Matty hums, turning his phone upside down and ignoring the call coming through. He couldn’t imagine anything that would matter as much as this, right now, as getting you on your feet and moving around. He wouldn’t ever turn away from you in a moment like this, not when you have seen him at his very worst, not when you’ve held his hand through the darkest moments of his life. He is your best friend, your partner, and he would never act as anything less than such. “Got a good writing session in. I did steal that line you wrote, by the way.”

“I want writing credit, Matthew,” you say, squeezing his hip and tilting your face slightly to give him the tiniest of smiles. “Can you tell me which line you stole?”

“Ah, a smile. That beautiful fucking smile of yours. I’m so in love with you. I need to see you smile every single day for the rest of my life. I can feel your smiles in the deepest parts of my heart. It’s like a breath of fresh air.”

“Matty,” you say, hiding your face in his chest and sucking a deep breath. His body smells like it always does, like home, like your person. Around you, the room is quiet, the television going quiet as the episode ends. “The episode is done.”

Matty brushes a stray strand of hair away from your forehead. “Are you ready to get out of bed for a bit?”

“Are you coming with me?”

“I would like to,” he says, cupping your cheek softly. His touch is so sweet, always so gentle. He always knows exactly what you need, exactly how to approach you. He’s always known, from the first moment you became friends all those years ago. He’s so familiar, and safe. “I’d also like to kiss you, if that’s okay.”

And with that, you understand what he means now, when he says that he feels your smile in the deepest parts of his heart, because hearing him say that, hearing him ask such a simple question but a question that you know is rooted in his care and affection for you, makes your heart feel so warm, and you feel it everywhere. His love is in your heart, where your chest feels tight and swollen. His love is in your cheeks, where your skin feels hot. His love is in your hands, where your skin feels electric every time you touch him. His love is in your brain, where you never feel like a weight to carry. His love is everywhere inside of you.

Nodding silently, Matty sits upright and grabs your cheeks, kissing you delicately, as though the slightest touch with cause you to break. Although sometimes it feels that way, that you might break, there has never been a moment where you would feel broken with him. With Matty, you’re you, all of you, no matter what that looks like.

“I can feel your kiss in the deepest parts of my heart and soul,” you repeat to him, leaning your forehead against his, your hands holding his wrists on your face. You don’t want him to let go, to move. There’s warmth between you, between the intimacy of the moment. “I can feel your love everywhere, no matter how I’m feeling.”

“That’s the line,” Matty smiles, rubbing his thumbs along your cheeks, and you realize what you’ve said, the line that he stole. “I can feel your love everywhere, darling. No matter where I am, what I’m feeling, or who I’m with. I can feel your love everywhere.”

[barbthebuilder]

I'm genderfluid and transmasc, and I'm very worried about my name.

I'm changing my first, middle, AND last names. I really like the ones I've chosen. They all make me happy on their own and they flow great together. It WOULD be perfect, except for my initials...

With my middle name, it's CAP, which is a word. No big deal, I can live with it. I think (hope) I'm past the age where my peers would use it to make fun of me lmao. HOWEVER. Without my middle name, it's CP. Which is short for child predator.

It bothers me soooooo much. I have no idea what to do about it. I'm wayyy too attached to my first name to change it, and I really don't want to change my last name either... But should I? Would it be for the best? Or am I just being really dramatic? Would anyone besides me even think of this? How concerned should I be? What do I do? HELP!

Yo! Thank you for the ask. I'm not sure if I'm the best person to give advice since I'm not familiar with name changing prosedures and such. But I will try anyway!

So, I think it's important to consider few aspects. First: how often will you be using your initials? Second: would anybody pay attention to them and then make connection to what they sound like? And if so... would they care? Would they make fun of your or bring it up? I personally think the chances are slim.

However it's another story if the abbrivation is bothering you specifically. Still, I would encourage you to think how often are you using you current initials, and if you do use them often, can you change that in the future? Or can you use CAP instead?

Have you heard of "good Adolf Hitler"? A man named Adolf Hitler won local elections in Namibia despite having such unfortunate name. He is apparently a cool guy and is not aiming for world domination lol.

Or, another anegdote. There was this guy who tattooed on his body name of his shop. What was that? "Isis". He did that before the organisation had been created so he had no idea.

Those silly stories prove that we sometimes are attached to certian words or letters that also have different meanings. That doesn't make us bad people and others are usually very understanding of that.

Anyways, if it still bothers you then I would consider changing last name to something else. Though, not to invalidate you or anything, I do think you are overthinking the whole situation a little bit ;) I genuinely think nobody will give you trouble because of your initials and if your last name makes you happy there is no need to change it.

But that's just my opinion!

[charmercharm3r]

Can I

SCB

Masterlist

wc: 9.8k

Synopsis: He didn't have a girlfriend when you met him, he won't have one when you're done with him.

warnings: smut, sub!changbin, tattooartist!changbin, dom!reader, unprotected sex (wrap it up people), reader is kinda a bitch, oral (both receiving), use of sex toys, nicknames, can't think of anything else really so lmk if there's something I should add

Part 4 of my 8 part series based off the album, “It Was Good Until It Wasn’t” by Kehlani, where each member of Stray Kids will have a song dedicated to them and whatever toxic relationship I can come up with.

-

Sleeping around wasn’t his thing. It wasn’t back in college and it isn’t now that he’s moved out of his parent’s house and has a full time job. Changbin loved his job, so much so that he fully disclosed during every consultation with a potential client that he has strict rules about what happens during tattooing sessions– as well as afterwards. He wasn’t sure what it was that made him attract his client like moths to a flame, and not just because they enjoyed his art style. Changbin knew he was relatively good looking, he worked hard to maintain his figure because he genuinely enjoyed the way it made him feel. Being in such close contact with people for hours on end, and in such intimate places at times, there needed to be boundaries.

He’d just finished cleaning up his work station after a grueling four hour set with a client who wanted a few panels from an anime on his calf. Changbin was satisfied with how the tattoo turned out, even though he didn’t like how thick the client wanted the borders. As long as they were happy, he was happy. “Changbin! Your four o’clock is here,” Jisung, body piercer and receptionist when needed, called out from the lobby. Fuck, he thought to himself. He’d completely forgotten he agreed to a consultation during his usual lunch break, stomach growling as he spread hand sanitizer over his palms and walking out of his work room.

The shop was usually packed on a Saturday afternoon, the other artists booked just as much as he was. Dusting off his pants, he looked at Jisung who was talking mid-conversation with whom he presumed to be his consultation.

“Ah, I’ve never seen that anime. Should I check it out?” Jisung leaned over the glass counter with puppy dog eyes at you, not noticing Changbin walk up.

“You should, it’s chaotic in all the best ways. Though, I’d be careful if you’re freaked out by blood,” you joked, batting your eyelashes at him. 

“Lucky for you, I’m not squeamish. I’m the shop’s piercer.” Changbin walked around the counter to stand next to Jisung, who still hadn’t acknowledged his friend. “So if I wanted some new jewelry, you’re the man I’d come to?” If Changbin didn’t take up so much space compared to the piercer, you wouldn’t have looked twice his way. He was thick in all the right places, buff and still so soft looking. His hair had been swept to the side as best as possible, sporting a “woke up like this but I’m still hotter than you” sort of look. Your attention to Changbin had Jisung following your gaze towards the muscular man, “here he is! This is Changbin, our anime tattoo specialist. He’ll be doing your consultation today.”

Changbin had been looking for the consultation paperwork on the counter, grabbing a clipboard and pen. When he looked up, you were staring at him intently, eyes almost piercing through him without the use of needles. If he didn’t know better he would’ve thought you were trying to read his mind. “Hi,” you spoke all too sweetly for the look of mischief that your expression held.

The tattoo artist gulped comically loud, for some reason his cheeks heating up under your alluring stare. “T-this way,” he stuttered out, head cocking the direction of his station. Both of the boys watched you as you sent a smirk to Jisung, walking further into the shop. As Changbin caught his breath again and turned to follow you, Jisung smacked his back a couple times and jumped excitedly. “She was definitely hitting on me. I think I might ask her for her number when you’re done,” he whispered into Changbin’s ear. You’d turned to see where he was, unsure of where you were going, and he was sure you’d heard them with the sultry look that seemed to be effortless. Looking back at his friend again, Changbin rolled his eyes and led you to the room.

He didn’t notice the plastic bag you were holding until you’d set it down on the table in the corner, closing the door and sitting on his usual stool. You rummaged through the bag, pulling out a paper wrapped sandwich and holding it out his way. Changbin looked at you quizzically, “I’m sure you haven’t eaten yet, so I picked up something on the way here. I hope you like Subway.”

Though reluctant to take a free meal from a client who was going to pay hundreds of dollars for his services, your insistence made him accept it. His stomach rumbled as he set it down on the end of the padded table, “thank you.” He’d begun unwrapping the sandwich as you hopped onto the table, slightly invading his personal space with how close you’d chosen to sit next to him and the meal. You swung your feet, legs bare as you wore only a pair of shorts and a loose shirt tucked into the front. Changbin could smell the strawberry lotion you’d put on this morning, adding to his already present hunger. Quickly taking a bite of the sandwich to distract himself from how soft your skin looked, he’d spoken again. “So what can I do for you?”

“I’m not sure how much you heard of my conversation earlier with…” your voice trailed off, looking to him for assistance.

“Jisung?” Although his mouth was full, Changbin’s jaw slightly dropped at your ignorance for not catching his friend’s name even though you were clearly flirting.

“Jisung, yeah…” for some reason, you paused, examining Changbin as he avoided eye contact with you. “That sandwich must have a great personality. You can’t look away from it longer than two seconds.” Changbin stopped eating immediately, cheeks full and eyes going wide at you calling him out.

“I— I mean, it’s a good sandwich,” was all he managed to come up with, finally meeting your face that was tilted and expressionless. Nervously, he finished what was in his mouth and wrapped it back up, setting it off to the side so his full attention was on you now. “You were saying… about Jisung?”

You hummed, “Jisung?” Changbin didn’t know how to act around you. He’d fiddled with his fingers while you remembered what you were here for. “Oh! The tattoo I wanted,” a smirk found its way back to your lips as you pulled your phone from your back pocket. “Have you seen the anime, Dorohedoro?” Changbin shook his head, no. Your fingers tapped your phone, flipping the screen to show him the reference picture. He ruffled his hair and pushed it to the side so it didn’t block his vision, though he couldn’t help noticing how pretty and slender your fingers were with nails cleanly done. The picture was of two characters, both wearing bunny ears and strange masks, Changbin had no idea what the show was about despite his extensive knowledge on anime. He took the phone from your hand, getting a closer look at it. There was no doubt in his mind he could do it.

“Where did you want it?” He handed you back your phone, careful to not let himself touch you. It was obvious, making you grin as his hands shook. Tossing the phone at the top of the table, you lifted your arm, exposing the underside of your right bicep. He took into consideration how supple your skin looked, practically glowing. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he stood and walked towards the back table. “If you don’t mind, I need to take some measurements,” he mumbled. “Do what you need to do.”

Finding the ruler and a marker, he found his way back in front of you. You held your arm out for him again, watching as he asked about how big you wanted it and marking the area you’d said. Now, he was even closer to you. Instead of just strawberries, he could smell something a little more floral sweet and powdery. It was intoxicating, Changbin slightly held his breath to keep himself together.

He pulled away, cursing himself for getting caught up in the proximity. It was quiet as he scribbled on the clipboard, not trusting himself to speak. So you broke the silence first, “think you can pull it off?”

Not looking up, “I know I can,” he responded softly.

“Great.” You jumped off of the table, pushing past him to get to your stuff in the corner. Changbin caught a whiff of you again, this time letting himself inhale deeply. You'd heard him, happy to know you made him nervous. After slinging your purse over your shoulder, you walked back up to him, waiting for his attention. It took everything in Changbin not to meet your seductive gaze and drown in your scent. Still, he failed, dropping the pen and finding your hand on his as you both reached to pick it up. You’d looked up at the same time as him, catching his eyes.

It was subtle, the way your head was tilted down so that you could look at him through your lashes the way you were looking at Jisung earlier. Only this time your eyes went back and forth slowly between his eyes and lips. They were perfectly plump and proportionate, so entirely kissable that you almost did, almost leaned in but stopped yourself by grabbing the pen from under his palm and standing. Changbin looked dazed from his crouched position in front of you, head upturned to keep contact. Another sinful smirk crossed your lips, watching as he slowly stood as well, knocking the tray of his tools slightly. This made you laugh and he internally swore he’d never heard anything so mesmerizing in his life. As embarrassed as he was to be making a fool of himself, he smiled knowing he’d been the one to force a sound such as your laugh from your lips. Still, his ears and cheeks burned.

You handed him the pen, gesturing to the forgotten papers with your eyebrows. “Right,” Changbin hurriedly took the pen, scribbling something down and turning to leave the room. Just as he got to the doorway, he faced you again. “I never got your name?” Telling him, he pursed his lips to keep from smiling and asked for you to follow him back to the front counter to finish up the process.

Changbin thanked the heavens that Jisung wasn’t there anymore, seeing him with a client across the room. Your footsteps padded lightly around the other side, politely waiting for him. “How much is it going to be?” You asked, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Um—” he paused, thinking of an estimation. “M–maybe around one fifty? It’s a lot of fine detailing,” he said it like he was afraid to offend you in some way.

“That’s reasonable. I would’ve paid more if it was your price. I’ve been waiting for a consultation with you to open up for months.” Months? You’d been waiting for him? If you’d come in person and asked to meet with him, Changbin would’ve kicked anyone out of the shop to make room for you.

You’d put him on the spot again, more blood rushing to his cheeks. “I’m glad you’re here now,” he admitted, truthfully so. With a gaze as devilish as yours, he’d swear he could burst into flames. He punched numbers into a calculator, switching what little attention he had back and forth between that and the paperwork. “I’m glad you’d agreed to take me.”

“How could I say no?” There was unintentional tension behind his words, realizing it all too late. You already read into his tone, watching his body shift uncomfortably as you leaned your elbows onto the counter. Not saying anything else, you just examined his hands gripping the pen and his mouth biting at the inside of his cheek. It was cute the way he looked up every few moments to see if you were still paying attention to him. You were, not planning on stopping until he asked for you to.

“Sign please,” he flipped the paper around to you, putting the pen down and turning his back to pretend to look busy so that you couldn’t see how red his face was. It didn’t hide the crimson of his ears, though. You did as he asked. “When can I see you next?” Changbin silently gasped and looked at you over his shoulder. If only he could’ve seen how shocked he looked, it made you feel giddy like a schoolgirl. How this big, masculine presenting man was absolute putty before you, not having to have lifted a finger to get him that way.

“For our first ink session,” you clarified. A sigh of relief escaped him, turning back around to regain some control over his breathing before he could look you in the face again. “Erm— I’ll have to check my calendar. I’ll give you my number and we can work it out.”

Grabbing one of his business cards, Changbin handed it to you. You took it, but set it down blank side up and reached for the pen again. He curiously watched you scribble on it, sliding it along with the paperwork across the counter towards him. “I’ve got your number already. Would you mind sending me a text when you’re free?” It was ballsy, sure. A bit rude? Maybe. But still absolutely flustering for Changbin, who could only nod eagerly and fiddle with the card. “Well then, you know how to reach me.”

Your eyes stayed on him for a moment, reading the way Changbin’s own stare traveled from your eyes, to your lips, down your neck, and stopping at the sight of your shirt tucked between your breasts that were unintentionally pushed together by your arms. He’d never looked at a client that way, not until now. Unsure of what came over him, he dumbly replied, “I’ll be waiting.” You’d cocked your head at him, finding the shakiness of his voice endearing. The lack of response kept him talking, “for your text… to set up an appointment. I didn’t mean— I didn’t wanna imply—”

“I know what you meant,” you giggled, “cute.” You didn’t show it, but you’d felt yourself grow fond of him after a few twenty minutes of meeting. His shyness made you want to just eat him up. A few moments passed, just the two of you basking in the other’s presence from opposite sides of the cash register. Once Changbin remembered where he was, he broke the contact and looked around the shop, taking that as your queue to leave. You pushed yourself off the counter and readjusted your shirt, “I’ll see you, Changbin.” The air left his lungs as his name rolled off your tongue, willing to give anything to hear you say it again. What almost knocked him off of his feet was the way you walked away towards the exit, using your back to push it open and sending him a wink followed by a cheeky smile. You were gone, and Changbin could feel himself already anticipating the next time he were to see you.

The dinging of your phone went off later that night, an unknown number showing up on your homescreen. You read it curiously, hey, got an opening on monday night. You didn’t actually have Changbin’s number, you just banked on the hope that you’d read all the signs right. Thankfully, you did.

Back at the shop, Jisung was counting the change in the register, waiting for Changbin to finish disinfecting his station after another client came in after you for a touch up. He’d come back to the front of the shop to meet with the piercer, sighing as they both plopped down onto some empty seats. Pulling out his phone, Changbin looked for your name in his message list to reread your text. It was stupid and far too sudden. Though, stupidity has a way of making itself entirely too present.

A moment later, another text came in. Can’t wait to see u tonight, it said. Another thing he’d forgotten that day, a date with a girl who he’d met a month ago. He let out another deep breath before locking his phone and dropping it onto the counter. “Fuck.”

Sunday went by all too fast. Even though Changbin was easy enough to wrap around your finger, it didn’t mean you planned it in the first place. It just sort of happened. Him, on the other hand, had forgotten for the time being about you. His date went well, they’d talked, drank, and had a lot in common. It surprised him, not actually expecting for anything to come from meeting up with her. It was a spur of the moment thing, giving his number to her when he’d accidentally crashed into her in the grocery store. He was excited to see her again. 

It was already Monday afternoon by the time you’d figured out how you were going to go about the tension with the tattoo artist. You were simply going to not do anything about it. If he still walked on eggshells around you, you’d act like he wasn’t. If he was straight forward, you’d simply reciprocate. 

You were laid out on his table, right arm extended so he could reach where you wanted him to work. For a while, it was professional, quiet with some occasional small talk. Then he asked about the tattoo, “you never told me about the show.”

“Hm? The anime?” you broke from your daze, trying not to think of the pain.

“Yeah,” he pulled the needle away from you and wiped the sheen of sweat on his forehead. Changbin reached for his water bottle and waited for you to respond.

“Don’t get me started, I won’t stop.”

“That good?” He smirked, so god awfully sinful.

“That good.”

Neither of you knew how it happened. One second you were handing him your credit card and the next you’re in the backseat of his car. The windows were dripping with the condensation you and Changbin created from being cramped over each other for so long. He’d flipped you into every possible position that could’ve been done in the tiny and uncomfortable space. Finally settling on laying you on your back with one leg hung over his shoulder while he used your other one to sling around his hip, he buried his face into your neck and pounding away. Car sex usually wasn’t your thing, however sometimes it’s good to get out of your comfort zone. 

That was only the first of many “ink sessions.” Though Changbin wasn’t wrong, it was a lot of little details he had to be thorough about. But tattoo sessions usually ended with his cock in your mouth, hands, or finishing into your cunt. Thankfully, birth control exists. You’d learned it was one of his favorite things to do, cum inside you. Although you’d gotten him to admit that, he still kept the areas he fucked you in to a minimum being his car, your car, his work room, wherever he could have you– except for his house. His reasoning for not inviting you over being, “I can’t do that to Jisung. It’d be breaking roommate code.” What position were you in to argue?

Clearly the more desperate one. It got to a point where you’d intentionally distract him during appointments, not breaking eye contact with him while you were immobile on your back, wearing less and less clothing, going as far shoving your hand down your pants because you wanted to see how the pain from the needle would feel along side the pleasure. You were just that comfortable. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t think that was the hottest thing he’d ever witnessed. That same day, he threw the tattoo pen down and ate you out on the table. This was a constant recurrence, up until you’d texted him one night asking to come over.

Can I stop by to see you tonight?

It’d been a hard week for him, and apparently you, using that excuse as the reason for the text. He’d sent the address almost instantly and told Jisung not to come out of his room for a while. “Why? Finally bringing someone over, hm?” his roommate joked. Changbin rolled his eyes, pushing Jisung into his room and closing the door for him. Another ding, you’d be over in fifteen minutes. That gave him just enough time to freshen up, clean his room, make sure he was clean all over and spray a little bit of cologne.

You were right on time, Changbin had lingered near the door so that he could listen for your footsteps. You didn’t even get to knock before he’d opened it, catching you adjusting your crop top and fixing your hair. There weren't really introductions or a house tour to be given, you were ushered towards his room before you could fully kick off your shoes. As soon as the two of you were alone in private– with a bed this time– it only took Changbin a matter of seconds to have yours and his clothes shed and lost somewhere in the room.

He wanted to take his time with you, he really did. But something about having you so close and intimate, able to smell the same strawberry lotion on your smooth skin, he’d do anything to please you. That’s how he ended up on his back with you on top of him, using his cock to get yourself off while he wasn’t allowed to so much as touch you, let alone cum. You were swirling your hips in circles and different patterns, reaching between your legs to toy with your clit, doing whatever you needed to reach another climax, and all Changbin could do was watch and wait for your command.

You looked down at him, hot and flustered with crimson cheeks, you couldn’t help but reach down and cup his chin to tilt up. “You’re doing so well, baby. Who knew a big boy like you would be able to last so long,” Changbin whimpered and your hips stilled, voluntarily clenching to feel as much of him as possible. His eyes screwed shut as he thought of anything that wasn’t your wet heat contracting around him to stop him from coming.

“Do I make you feel good? Do you wanna cum, big boy?” Changbin nodded furiously, knuckles whitening as he gripped the sheets harder. “Say it. Let me hear you.”

“Please! Yes– wanna cum so bad.” You gripped his chin tighter, forcing him to look at you. His eyes were watering and on the verge of tears, and damn did it make you just want to eat him up. Smiling down at him, withering and fucked out without getting to cum once, you said, “too bad.”

He arched into the bed and shut his eyes again, the tears finally falling. “You’re a fucking demon.”

You leaned down and tipped his face to the side to gain access to his ear. “Hi, I’m Hell. It’s nice to meet you,” you whispered as you bit on the sensitive lobe. This ripped another groan from him, he was losing his patience and so, so close to busting without your permission. It was easy to tell, he was squirming and breathing incredibly hard. Despite your words, you took pity on him. He just looked all too pretty to keep denying. You used him a bit longer, just enough to get you to the same point as he was. That didn’t take very long, his whines and pretty tears had you reeling.

Running your hands up his defined chest and along his arms slowly, you took his hands and brought them to your hips. He gripped them hard as soon as your skins touched. Lifting your hips and just leaving the tip in, you made room for him to move. “Cum.” No more time was wasted, Changbin wrapped his arms around your torso and held on for dear life to pound into you from below. The hand you snuck into his hair to pull at spurred him on, lips attaching to his neck to leave nasty marks. Your walls pulsed around him ever so tightly, he was close. His pelvis rubbed against your clit so, so nicely, bringing you to melt into him and your orgasm took over your body. As your toes curled and body convulsed over him, Changbin pulled you as close to him as possible, hips stuttering and staying buried deep inside as he unloaded himself into you. To say orgasm denial after denial was his favorite thing, he’d be lying. However you made it feel euphoric, it was the hardest he’d ever come. The way you called his name and touched him like he was all you saw— he really did believe you were Hell itself.

You’d spent the night, both of you too tired to even clean up. But when Changbin woke up, you were gone. All that you’d left was a note on his bedside table next to a pair of soiled panties, saying how you had to get to work and that you’d text him. He took the panties, bringing them to his nose and letting your scent fill his senses. Even after the mind blowing orgasm and getting to fall asleep in your arms, he longed for you again. Everything you did, even if you didn’t mean to do it, kept him so easily wrapped and tied around your pretty fingers. The only problem was being able to keep you in his bed. 

Changbin had a good chunk of time before he was supposed to see you again for your next appointment, giving him time to grab some food for dinner. He was sitting in the front of the shop again, chit chatting with his roommate about what food they should order. The bell of the door rang, Jisung immediately jumped to greet whoever it was. “Hi, how can I help you?”

“Actually, I’m here to see Changbin.” The mentioning of his name made him snap his head to attention. In his element stood the girl he’d gone out with some time ago, a nervous smile plastered on her face. Standing abruptly, he knocked his chair back into the wall, causing the other customers and artists in the shop to stare.

“Wh— hi? What’re you doing here?” There was a shakiness to his voice. She didn’t say anything, smiling wider and holding up a plastic to-go bag. There was a moment of silence as she placed the bag on the counter and began removing its contents, Changbin and Jisung sharing a confused look. The girl pulled out a Subway sandwich and a cookie, “I— I got you food. I wasn’t sure what you liked so I just— well, I tried to remember what you had when we got dinner and kind of went from there. You don’t have to eat it—“

“Thank you,” Changbin cut her off, placing his hand on hers that rested on the counter. She blushed, her eyes widening at his touch.

Just then, the bell rang again. The girl was too entranced in the contact to react with the piercer and tattoo artist to see you walk in, a plastic bag in hand and a smile that wiped clean off your face as soon as you spotted his hand on hers. Changbin was frozen in place, a deer caught in the headlights except the headlights were his two worlds colliding. He locked eyes with you, both of you unmoving. It took a moment for the girl to follow his gaze behind her, seeing who was distracting him from such an intimate moment.

You were more confused than anything, eyeing the way he’d hesitated to pull away from her and wiping his hand onto his jeans. The girl’s head turned a few times between you and him, Jisung just as lost. It wasn’t like the two of you were exclusive, but you had both disclosed that there was no one else either of you were sleeping with. Apparently, that didn’t mean there wasn’t anyone else emotionally.

You weren’t about to be the first one to back down from the intense staring contest. Narrowing your eyes, you then realized he wasn’t going to acknowledge anything in front of her, clearly not wanting to leave her with a bad impression. You shouldn’t have cared about this in the slightest, but for some reason it made your blood boil.

You had a new idea. Breaking away first, you turned to the piercer, “hi Jisung. I brought you this,” you walked in front of him, standing next to the girl and holding the bag out for Jisung to take. Changbin was staring daggers at you, but the pettiness inside told you to ignore it.

“Me?” Jisung was blushing just as red as the girl. Nodding, you pushed the bag out further for him. As he took it from you, you passed a quick glance at Changbin. He looked as though he was going to combust. Changbin had to remember that his roommate had no idea about the affair that the two of you had going on, forcing him to act as if everything was normal. “Just thought of you on my way over here,” you said sweetly, but Changbin could hear the venom lacing intended for him.

Seeing you paying no mind to the artist made the girl relax a little, turning back to him to reclaim his attention. She was speaking clear and coherent sentences to him, but every word that came out of her mouth went in one ear and out the other to Changbin who was too focused on listening in on your and Jisung’s conversation. He was talking to you like you’d known each other forever, making you laugh the way that lulled Changbin in like a siren song. Every fiber in his body told him to be jealous of his roommate, however his brain reminded him of who was standing before him.

“Did you… did you hear what I said?“ The girl asked, realizing that Changbin’s mind was a million miles away from her.

“Wha— yeah,” he replied, unbothered. “Yeah, I heard you.” He hadn’t. He was too worried about how you and Jisung were both leaning in a little too close to each other over the counter and your hand was running along his bicep. Changbin ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself down from the sudden emotional turmoil that stirred inside of him. Why was he jealous of his friend when he was the one who got to fuck you? More than once, at that. Clearly he had something that Jisung didn’t, so why were you making the same eyes at him as you did at Changbin?

He’d had enough, putting the lunch contents the girl had gotten for him back into the plastic bag and placing it on the seat behind him. “Sorry, I’m glad you stopped by but I have another appointment right now. I’ll text you,” he said quickly, walking around the counter and towards his work room.

You hadn’t looked at him, still deep in conversation with Jisung. Laughing, you lightly smacked his arm as if he were the funniest man in the world. “Y/N,” Changbin called out for you, a new stern tone to his voice. His voice didn’t startle you, but the way he spoke annoyed you. The girl was still next to you, looking as if she were going to burst into tears if you said anything to her. Looking at her for a split second before locking eyes with the tattoo artist, you squeezed Jisung’s hand and pushed away from the counter. “Text me later, Ji.” Sending him a wink, you pushed past the girl.

Changbin was angry, fully knowing he had no right to be. He knew he had the other girl on the side, if you would count it that way. Usually, the one you take out on proper dates where people can see you, that was the one you dated for long periods of time. The one you kept a secret, only contacting late at night or saving their contact under a different name was the side piece. Something about the girl made Changbin realize he didn’t like easy pleasing, he wanted the chase and the hard work that came with trying to reach you.

Your shoulder bumped harshly into Changbin as you walked by, that being the first time you acknowledged him since you’ve arrived. He huffed, groaning as he watched the girl leave in a hurry. Jisung’s mouth hung open so wide he could’ve caught flies watching your hips sway into the room. 

The door slammed behind you, heavy footsteps pacing back and forth. You set your stuff down in the back as usual, but didn’t bother sitting on the table. Instead, you leaned against it to watch Changbin bite at his nails and stomp around. “Aren’t you going to sit down?” you said after a few moments.

“Why did you give it to Jisung?”

“Looked like you already had your hands full.” The answer took him aback, making him stop his pacing. He couldn’t do anything but stare at you, dumbfounded. “Who is she?”

“No one important.”

“No?” you scoffed, “sure looked like she was.”

“Are you jealous of her?”

“Are you jealous of Jisung?”

“Yeah, actually. You gave him my food.”

“What makes you think it was for you? Because I’m fucking you?” Changbin raised an eyebrow, stepping closer. You could smell his cologne, not the usual spiciness of a man’s scent but something rather soft and comforting. Tonka and lavender, a scent you could fall into right now like you have so many times before. “You are jealous.”

“How can I be jealous when I’m the one under you every other night? If anything, I’d say you’re the jealous one. All I did was speak to another man and I could practically see the smoke coming out of your ears.” He was caught there. That really was all you did, and rightfully so. Changbin had neglected to tell you about the girl, whose name he couldn’t even remember now. “You gave him what was mine.”

“And what was yours?” You pushed off the table, closing the space between you and him. Intimidated, Changbin took a step back but you kept coming. You forced him to circle back around so that now he was pressed against the table and you caged him in. “The food or my attention?”

There was no real reason for either of you to have any malicious feelings for the subject, truth be told. But every ounce of your being wanted to rip her throat out for touching him the way you do, and simultaneously force him to kneel at your feet and lick your shoes clean. While Changbin had never felt such envy for someone, such rage against a person he cared for dearly such as his friend. All together still willing to do everything in his power to give you anything you could ever want.

Changbin didn’t know how to respond, the devilish smirk plastered to your face and the way your eyes pierced right through him, it was terrifying. “I’m not second best. So you better speak, big boy.” The nickname made him shiver. “I could walk into that lobby and easily find someone who won’t think of me as such. Y’know, I think your roommate might have a crush on me.”

“What do you want from me?” he asked in a whisper before he’d really considered the question. The smile never left your lips as you pressed your body against his. He gripped onto the sides of the table as one hand traveled up his belly, fingertips tracing his pectoral before stopping over his throat. The same hand just barely wrapped around it as you leaned in to whisper in his ear, “I want you to be mine and only mine.”

“And you? Will you only be mine, too?” This made you tighten your hand on this neck, a gasp leaving him as his body tensed under the strange sensation. Your breath was hot along the shell of his ear, you wanted him to cower under you. A small laugh left your lips, “if you behave.” Changbin’s breath hitched, feeling your warm mouth pepper kisses under his ear, down the side of his neck, and remove your hand to nip at his adam’s apple. His head fell back, eyes closing while you worked to undo his belt. You brought your face back up to his, trailing your tongue along his cheek and grazing his lips with yours, not fully kissing him. You didn’t pull his pants down all the way, unzipping it just enough to let his boner free a bit through his boxers. “Are you going to behave?”

“Anything for you,” he meant it. Changbin breathed out, so desperate for your touch. You crashed your lips to his, grabbing his dick through his boxers much rougher than he’d ever been treated. The grip was bone crushing, not ceasing as you swallowed every single one of his whimpers and whines. Tongues and teeth knocked against one another, Changbin fighting a losing battle with you. Though you pushed him away prematurely, letting go of his cock as well. “You’re done for the day. Come home with me.”

“Can I?” he asked stupidly.

“Unless you’d rather me torture you here for everyone else to hear?” He shook his head no. Eyes looking down to the boner in his pants, you said, “get yourself together, I’ll be waiting outside. Five minutes.” With that, you quickly grabbed your stuff and unlocked the door. He could hear Jisung calling your name, but was unsure if you’d stopped to talk to him again. Shaking out his hair as if it would rid himself of the jealousy that arose, Changbin tucked himself into his pants and zipped it up, looking into the mirror. His cheeks and ears were bright red, flushed from embarrassment and arousal. 

He did his best to calm his heart from beating out of his chest, sure you could hear it just as loud as he did now. Changbin sucked in a deep breath to prepare to face those outside the door, specifically Jisung. He’d made up a bullshit excuse about not feeling well to get his friend to let him leave, although he knew that Jisung was suspicious. It only confirmed this skepticality when he watched Changbin get into your car through the lobby window.

The drive was short, one of your hands on the steering wheel while the other played with his fingers in his lap. Before Changbin could even blink, you were walking him up the stairs to your apartment and through the front door.

He watched you place your coat and bag onto the couch and wander into the empty space between you two. You reached out to grab his hand again softly, a glimmer in your eyes shining playfully as you led him into your bedroom. Once inside, you closed the door behind him, turning him before he could fully take in your safe space and kissing him. There was such a fervor behind it, much more heated than the ones he’s already used to sharing with you. Hesitance took over his body, unsure if he should touch you like he wanted or let you have him your way. Your palms cupped his jaw, pulling him away again. Whines left his lips as you ran your thumb over the bottom one, so eager to keep you close to him. “I’m not going easy on you tonight, big boy. You really hurt my feelings,” sinister grin growing as you spoke.

“Don’t. I can take it,” Changbin challenged. He always did like a fight. By the collar of his shirt, your lips collided once more, taking your time to strip each other of the cloth barriers.

“You remember your colors?” You asked him as you’d come to the last piece of clothing on your body, your panties. He nodded, sat on the edge of the bed, watching and waiting. “Tell me,” your fingers played with the hem.

“Green is good, yellow slows down, red you stop.” He licked his lips as you hummed and slowly brought the panties down your legs, instructing him to get on the bed.

Changbin was laid out on his back again, the same way he’d been when you were at his house. Only now, you weren’t on top of him and he couldn’t feel your body heat. You were standing next to the bed, a box in hand that rattled a little when you set it on the nightstand, pulling out a bottle of lube. As you squirt some of the lube into your palm, you climb between his spread legs.

“Do you trust me?” He watched you rub your hands together, bringing them down to firmly double fist his leaking cock and spread the substance. It was cold, but your hands with the slick made it warm and feel oh so nice. You did your best to ignore the pulsing in your core, you’d be dripping if your own legs weren’t pressed closed.

Eyes shut, he replied, “n– no.” You scoffed at him. “And here you are, letting me play with you like a toy. Are you a toy, Binnie?” Your thumb sweetly swiped the precum, bringing it to your mouth to suck the salty liquid. When he didn’t answer, you dug the same digit into his slit. He let out a guttural groan, “words, toy.”

“‘m n– not a toy.” He couldn’t find the strength to look at you.

“No, you’re not. You just like to use them, don’t you?” One hand let go of his throbbing cock, reaching for the box you’d set aside. Changbin’s eyes shot open reluctantly, anxious to see what you’d pull out. In your hand was a cock ring. If the intention wasn’t for it to be used on him, he’d have thought it was pretty, sleek baby pink rubber that had two bunny ears at the top of the circle. You reached for the lube again, adding a bit to your finger and slicking it through the hole of the ring. His eyes went wide as he watched you stretch the ring open testingly. “Hm, not sure you’ll even fit in this little thing, you’re so big. What do you think? Want to try?” The complement and belittling piece of rubber had blood shooting straight to his dick, making it sit up straighter and harder. “I think you do.”

Stretching it as much as you could, you instructed him to hold his cock up while you slipped it onto him. You did struggle a little to get it over his head, he was just that big. But once you did, the bunny ears sat on the underside of the base, holding his cock upright for your viewing pleasure. Changbin let out a toe curling moan, loud and deep from his chest. “F— fuck, it’s so tight.” He shuddered into the pillows.

“If you think that’s tight then you’ll love what I have for you next.” Leaning in to give him a contrasting supple kiss, you also grabbed the final item from the box. A fleshlight that Changbin didn’t realize was in your hand until you grabbed his throat and forced him back into the pillows. 

His eyes went wide upon seeing it, “wait— no. C’mon babe, this is humiliating enough.” He gestured down to the ring around his cock.

You laughed, “I told you, you really hurt my feelings when I saw you with that girl. Maybe you could pretend it was her you’re fucking instead of a toy. I’m sure she’d love to hear all about you calling her name when you cum.”

A deep breath strained from his mouth as he closed his eyes and shook his head no, “god— I don’t want her or this stupid toy, I want you. I need you.”

“No, you need my pussy. And I’m still upset so you’ll take what I give you until I’m satisfied.” You stood up on your knees, using them to spread his legs wider. Changbin had full view of your soaking cunt, eyes trained on the way you used your hand to swipe the arousal from your heat and spread it around the entrance of the toy. His mouth watered, able to smell your essence already. “Want me that bad you’re willing to fuck a toy that even just smells like me? What a dog.”

“Please, don’t,” he whimpered as you went to raise the toy over the head of his cock. You looked into his eyes, big, red, and pleading. They threatened to spill tears for you again, it tugged at the heartstrings you tried so hard to keep hidden. “Color, baby?”

Changbin gulped, letting out a shuttering breath, “green. Just please— don’t hurt me too long.”

Baring your teeth to him, you throw your legs over his to straddle as you aligned the toy again. “Don’t make me repeat myself. I’ll do with you what I want.” Sinking the toy over his lubricated dick, you slowly rode it up and down, tightening both hands around it to give it some extra strength. His chest heaved heavily, pants growing shorter as he tried to convince himself the toy was you, that you were riding him nice and slow the way you’d done so many times before.

Of course, the way this big and muscular man was crumbling before you had your pussy throbbing, your heartbeat was between your legs and you loved it. You loved how easily he submitted to you without asking for more than you were willing to give. Except that made you want to give him more, take him to new heights you knew he’d never experienced with anyone before. The way he reacted to the cock ring was proof of that, the same now that he was balls deep in the fleshlight and the ring making his dick swollen and extra sensitive.

You pumped the toy over him for a while longer until his imagination started to fail him, “not enough. Please, need your pussy.” Letting one hand drop to cup his spasming balls and knead. Then, you reached for his own hands that were glued to the sheets, replacing yours to hold the fleshlight as your fingers caressed his chest. His pecs were immaculate, broad and tough. All it took was a tweak of his nipple to make the strong man cry out. His hips bucked into the toy, almost throwing you off his lap. You caught yourself by falling into his chest. “Watch yourself, dog. I’ll put you in another collar around your neck,” you sent a light smack to his nipple, another groan falling as his hips stuttered into the toy.

“You just need to fuck, don’t you?” His hands shivered as he felt one of yours cup over them, the other holding his hips down to steady them to a slower pace. Warmth flooded his chest when he saw you lean down to place kisses over his heart, gentle. The softness was short lived, “bet that’s why you kept her around. You need a side piece for your side piece.”

Changbin stilled his thrusts all together, “n— no. You’re not a side piece.” He looked at you like you’d hung the stars just for him, every tear he’d shed out of more than just lust. He was infatuated, so purely and helplessly enamored with everything you did to make him drown in that fucking strawberry lotion. It was like you finally understood, finally saw that he was just confused. Confused about you, confused about what he wanted, who he wanted, how he intended to get it.

Without another word, you get off of him, taking the fleshlight from cock. Moving to the edge of the bed, you sat on your knees facing him. “Stand up and come here,” you pointed behind you, toy still in hand. He did as commanded, leaving the bed to tower over you. You bent forward onto your hands and knees, giving Changbin the littlest bit of hope you’d taken pity on him. He was wrong again.

You held the fleshlight under your glistening cunt, arousal dripping onto it. Looking back at him, your expression was as serious as it was seductive, he didn’t need to ask what you wanted of him. But still, you told him anyway. “Fuck. Like the dog you are.” His body tensed at the degradation, betraying him because in his mind he wasn’t a dog— he didn’t do anything wrong. However, his dick disagreed. He silently loved the humiliation and the way you knew just how to push his buttons, it made when you praised him and loved on him all the more sweet.

His hands hesitated to take your waist, entranced by the way you clenched around nothing. He was right there, you were just as horny as he was so why were you making him do this? “Can I touch you?“

“Yes, now hurry up. Or else neither of us are coming tonight.” That was motivation enough, the promise of him being able to cum if he just did as you asked made him stick the tip of his cock into the toy again and take hold of your hips. It was a bit slicker this time now that your arousal had coated it just a bit more. Changbin moaned as he came to the hilt of the toy. Seeing how you bit your lip as you watched him is what kept him going. Seeing you enjoy his punishment, painfully chasing his high that was still so far away as you wiggled in his face what he could’ve been buried in right now.

He had to tear his eyes away from yours to stop from losing himself to the painful pleasure. Instead he looked at your pretty pussy, pulsing, just begging for him to be inside you. What killed the impending orgasm was that he could look an inch down and find himself not inside you, fucking a toy that didn’t feel remotely as good as he knew you did. He watched as you brought the fleshlight a bit higher and held it between your legs, just enough to rub against your clit every time he pushed in and pulled out. You were getting off on it, using the toy to masturbate as you tortured him. You liked it, liked watching him suffer with a promise of pleasure by the end of it.

You let out the first moan he’d heard all night, it was quiet and not intended for his ears. But you just couldn’t help it anymore, the heat from his cock radiated through the toy and it made you want to forget the whole thing and let him fuck you stupid. But you had a point to prove. He had to know who was in charge, how the relationship dynamic would work if he decided he did want you the way he said he did.

Your moans got louder while Changbin’s turned into whines, unable to bring himself to the high that he could see you approaching from rubbing yourself on the toy. You were so close, but not close enough. Prying a hand off your hip, “put two in.” This was the most intimate he’d been able to touch you all night, his cock jumped at the opportunity.

Changbin used his thumb to collect some of your juices, bringing them to his lips and sucking. God, did your taste drive him insane, fueling his thrusts to go just a bit faster. The tips of his index and middle fingers traced your hole, just feeling you. It was teasing, something you weren’t used to being done to you, usually the other way around. “For fucks sake, Changbin if you don’t—“

“Doesn’t feel so good when it’s you, does it?” He smirked to himself. 

You stole the fleshlight from his dick and crawled away from him, a whimper escaping him. “Guess you don’t want to cum as much as I thought you did.” Falling onto your back, you threw the fleshlight to the side and spread your legs wide, feet planted firmly on the bed. “Since you want to be a smart ass, you’re gonna stand there and watch me cum.”

It was a show, your fingers rubbing furiously at your clit as the other hand pumped in and out of your little hole— well, tried to. You couldn’t reach the places you needed, it was frustrating. Changbin enjoyed every second of it, watching you torture yourself because your ego was just that fragile that you didn’t want to use the cock that was in front of you. He refrained from touching himself, as difficult as it was, he also had a point to prove. He told himself he was just for you, his body only for you to touch, his cum only for you to milk, his heart only for you to rip from his chest and make him wring it dry.

You tried to keep up to domme act, you really did. But Changbin standing at the foot of your bed, cock hot, untouched, and ready to be used, you couldn’t help yourself anymore.

Pulling your fingers from your cunt, you sat up on your elbows and tilted your head at him. “Wipe that smirk off your face and fuck me.”

He didn’t waste anymore time, settling between your legs and hooking your ankles behind his back. When he finally sunk into you, his cock throbbed the hardest it had all night against the rubber ring. Neither of you were sure how long you’d been at it since the beginning— the teasing, the torture, it all blurred together to lead you to this moment. His hands caught his weight next to your head as your knees caged around his ribs, pulling him impossibly closer. Your warm walls contracted around him, making it so hard for Changbin to focus on not just blowing his load right now. He moaned, burying his face into your neck. The sweat from your bodies mixed together as your arms wrapped around his head and tugged his hair. Your heels dug into the small of his back, urging him to move. And when he did, it was like all Hell broke loose.

Changbin pounded into you like no tomorrow, cock filling you up in all the places only he could reach. The familiar sound of skin slapping against skin was like the rhythm and his moans were the melody, music to your ears. He bit into your shoulder one more time before sitting up and hauling your hips higher, getting the angle so it’d hit your deepest spot just right. Each time he entered you again, your body slowly inched up towards the headboard, the wood banging against the wall. It probably pissed off your neighbors, but neither of you seemed to care as he bit his lip and pulled out to flip you on your stomach. His raw strength was out on display, holding your body mid air by the front of your hips and your legs limp on the outside of his. You tried to hold your upper body up, doing a shit job of it as he pummeled into you again and your arms gave out. You fell face first into the pillows and reached out to hold your hands to the headboard. Turning your entire upper body, you finally could see him, watch him use you to chase his own pleasure.

That was one of the biggest turn ons, being able to deny, deny, deny him. Then the minute you gave him an inch of freedom, he took it and ran for miles.

You clenched, feeling the rubber ring rub against your clit so nicely every time he pushed back in. His hands gripped so hard, you were sure there’d be bruises tomorrow— which was a small price to pay for the wonderful pleasure Changbin was bringing you. You’d been building your orgasm ever since you’d put the ring around his cock, it was just such a pretty sight. He, on the other hand, had been about to blow numerous times. He didn’t need much, but the cock ring made it difficult despite how sensitive he was because of it.

“Shit, you even fuck like a dog. Do you even— fuck— know how to use that big dick of yours?” Your eyes were glazed over, cheeks flushed and sweat matting your hair to your forehead. It was the prettiest thing Changbin has ever seen, your dirty words being a complete 180 from your looks made his head dizzy.

He wanted to please you, he wanted to so badly that he just kept pounding away. You fluttered around him, close enough that it sucked in his cock every time it pulsed around it. “Fuck! Keep going, ‘m so close.”

He was too, grunting and groaning as his arms went numb from holding you up. It wasn’t that you were heavy, not by any means, but he wasn’t thinking of anything else other than to cum. If you were close, that meant he needed to be too if he wanted his sweet release. So he jackhammered harder, faster into you to catch up.

And when you convulsed around him, so fucking tight and for so fucking long, Changbin released as well, moaning your name and coating your insides white, hot, and sticky.

He didn’t drop you right away, slowly easing your body into his lap to collect yourselves. Still, your body writhed and twitched as you came down, breathing labored and uneven. Your eyes were closed as Changbin hunched over you, brushing your wet hair from your face to give you a small kiss on the cheek. You smiled at the action, twiddling your fingers to look for his. He gave it to you, squeezing gently before trying to pull out without hurting you. Wincing as he did, you rolled over to help him take the ring off. “Shit, is this how you feel every time I pull out?”

You laughed at his remark, putting it and the fleshlight back into the box to clean later. He knelt at the foot of the bed, unsure what to do. You beckoned him over with your arms held out wide. Changbin all but jumped into them, face down into your breasts. He wanted to switch positions, but somehow you coerced him into staying put. “Haven’t you ever heard of a weighted blanket?”

“A two pound blanket isn’t the same as an entire human being.” You both laughed, drowsiness begging to overtake you.

As your eyes closed and your fingers tangled in his hair, you called out to him. “You’re spending the night.”

“Can I?” sleep polluted his voice.

“No,” you whispered as you kissed the top of his head.

-

A/N: yay part 4! ngl this took me a gooooood minute to write cus there were so many ways I wanted this to unfold but i’m decently happy with how it did.

Another spoiler for part 5..? I’m thinking Jeongin hehehe I’ve got an idea for it already.

Leave me feedback!

-momo < 3

[armpirate]

UNDER HIS SKIN || JJK || Ch. 19

Pairings: tattoist!jk x fem!reader

Genre: smut, angst, friends to lovers, tattoo au, virgin reader.

Summary: They say there are two versions for every story, and it's important to hear both of them. Everybody is hearing your side of the story, but it's just fair to get to know his.

After breaking up with his girlfriend, the only thing he wanted was to have fun with no attachment. You wanted to get rid of your virginity, and he wanted to tick you off his list. What he didn't expect was getting so emotionally attached to you that he would regret the deal.

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

I jump out of my own sleep when I feel something hitting me, looking around confused until I realize that last night I didn't sleep by myself, and Y/n is the one who woke me up. She keeps shaking her head, slightly furrowing her eyebrows, as she keeps humming something.

I doubt whether to wake her up or not, but I end up doing it anyway.

She is just in her place, I can almost see how she stops breathing for a quick moment before she opens her eyes surprised.

—You had a nightmare —I try to calm her down, as confusion keeps radiating through her face—. It's alright.

When her body falls back on the mattress, I instantly drag her back to my body to hug her tight. Her shaky breathing slowly enters a calmer pace, and she finally relaxes in my arms when she lets her head rest on my chest.

—I'm sure you were a soccer player in your previous life —I joke—. I won't be able to walk tomorrow.

—Sorry.

I can tell she's genuinely sorry for what she did, but I don't really want her to feel bad about this. It wasn't her fault.

—You aren't sorry, aren't you? —I joke again, trying to get her to be back to her own self.

—Not really —I giggle.

I let out an exaggerated sigh, making it sound loud enough so she can hear it. And it seems to work out, because I feel her eyes on me as soon as that sound leaves my lips. I lift one of my eyebrows, looking down at her.

—I know I'm handsome and what not, but you should try to sleep.

Although I really like the way she's looking at me right now.

—Mr. Humble entered the room —she finally moves her eyes away, her gaze lazily lost at some point in my room.

—Why are you looking at me like that then? —I pinch her shoulder, trying to regain her attention.

—Now I can't look at you?

—There's a reason why you look at things.

—Yeah, because they get your attention —she finally looks up again with a sassy grin—. And it gets my attention how annoying you are.

—Then why are you sleeping here if I'm so annoying? —I try to snap back with the same attitude she's giving me.

—You're right.

I feel her slipping out of my arms, trying to get out of bed. Although I know she's just joking around, I rush to hold her waist to drag her back in bed with me. She changes positions though, she isn't laying on me. Her eyes pierce on mine, as if she were trying to get to know all my secrets, while she's lying on her sides. All that staring contest only ends up in giggles and laughs that come up for no reason.

Silence.

And again, that powerful gaze that could make me slip all of my secrets to her.

And it works.

—I was waiting for you —I say out of nowhere.

Her confused look and frowned eyebrows show clearly enough how she doesn't know what I'm talking about right now.

—You asked me what I was doing when you texted me earlier tonight. I was waiting for you —I explain.

The wrinkles in the middle of her eyebrows slowly disappear when she seems to finally understand. She still seems confused anyway. Maybe because of the comment, maybe because she didn't like the way our conversation could go at any point from now on.

I don't even know why I worded it that way.

—I wanted to be there for you in case you needed help, which it's what happened —I fake explain, trying to find a way out so things won't get weird.

—I handled it myself.

And there she is back again. Her cocky attitude is making a comeback.

—If I hadn't picked you up, he would've taken you home and that dude would've ended up with a scratched car.

Or, even worse, contacting you again to try to get a second date.

—For how long will you remind me of that? —she rolls her eyes.

—Daisy will never be the same.

—You know what? Let's sleep.

We both pretend to get to sleep after I mutter an almost inaudible "Fine", but silence doesn't last long before we start giggling and laughing again. We both open our eyes almost at the same time, laughing even harder when we mirror each other's actions without being aware.

—Cocktease —I try to sound as serious as I'm able to between laughs—, some people need to wake up early to work tomorrow.

And while that's true, I wouldn't mind spending the rest of the night awake like this. Even if I'm going to regret it in the morning.

I feel a bit disappointed when she in fact pays attention to what I say and rolls on her side, making her back face me and leaving me no other choice but to do the same.

✸ ✸ ✸

I sense her moving, trying to get away from my grip, which completely wakes me up. I don't let her get away though, I press on her body carefully, making sure she stays in her place.

—Just stay like this for a little longer —I mutter with my eyes still closed—. You need to make up for me not wanting to go to work this morning.

—Why is it my fault?

—As if you didn't know —I move closer to her, lost in the fruity smell of her hair as my nose digs in her locks—. Who would want to leave you here, looking like this, huh?

—Call Mark, and tell him you can't go —I smile with my eyes still closed.

Oh, I would if I could.

—Don't tempt me. Because I'm way too close to do it.

Of course, Mark has to break the moment by calling me to make sure I'll wake up early, so I get there in time. He already told me he'd be late this morning because he had an appointment with the doctor, which means I'm in charge of the studio for a few hours.

Although I need to leave soon, I have no problem with her staying around and taking her time before she leaves. But she keeps saying she'll leave when I do, and that's perfect because it means I could make sure she gets back home safe.

—Don't worry —she assures me—. Not my first time.

—A quick stop doesn't bot... —her eyes fall on me abruptly, death written in her pupils as she throws several daggers at me— Alright, got it. Wanna hang out later?

—Do you have something in mind?

—Not really —I shrug, walking to her—. But no plan is the best plan.

I don't really care what we do. To be honest I have enough with just spending time with her, like we've done the last few weeks.

—I'll pick you up by seven? —I ask her, when she gives in to the offer.

Thinking this is it, I see Y/n picking up her things and making her way to the door. She can't leave that way though. I hold her wrist, stopping her steps and making her turn on her heels so she's looking at me again.

—I'll send you a text when I get home? —she tries to guess.

Right answer, but that's not it.

I lay a soft peck on her exposed forehead, finally letting go of her arm so she can go back home.

Although she seemed perfectly fine in the morning, I can't stop thinking about what happened last night and that nightmare. She looked so scared, ready to run away at any point as she tried to defend herself from the ghost that was holding her. And when she opened her eyes... I could see the same horror she's had reflected on them a few times whenever we tried to do something.

She would easily look focus whenever she got too deep in her own feelings, but it only happens when it's something sexual.

Could be...?

I shake my head, trying not to think about it. I'm definitely overthinking and creating a bunch of stories in my head. I'm making my blood boil for no reason.

Of course, my impulse acts faster than my brain, and I end up calling Yoongi before I'm able to process what I'm doing.

—Oh, Jungkookie —he teases me—. How are you doing?

—I'm okay, what about you? —I rest my weight on the backrest of the sofa.

—Fine —he simply answers—, although weirded out. You never call... What do you need? —but he doesn't let me answer— Tell me you didn't get in any bullshit and want me to get you out of it.

Honestly, last time I called him was indeed because Tae had a problem with his pub and some permits he did (not) have. He helped us both, even if that wasn't his area of work. So his reaction isn't strange at all, and he isn't wrong either. But I don't want to make it as obvious either, that's why I start a small talk that will take us nowhere.

How could I word it so it doesn't sound suspicious?

—I was talking last night with one of my friends —I start, and considering I have a reduced group of friends, he possibly will end up thinking I'm talking about Tae—, he's a psychologist and he's dealing with a difficult case right now —I scratch my nape—. He has a patient that keeps having nightmares, and seems to have problems when she gets intimate with someone.

I also remember how she didn't want to go back home alone when she got drunk, because she was scared of a man hurting her.

—He is suspicious that it could be related to some trauma when she was younger, and I was wondering if you've had a similar case before?

—For what you're telling me, she doesn't seem to be aware of her own trauma?

—Doesn't seem like it —I shrug.

—I had a similar case, but she was aware of what provoked all of those reactions —he finally says—. The family of the girl sued her uncle for abusing her when she was twelve. And yeah, the trauma caused her to avoid any type of sexual intimacy with any other man as she grew older. I remember I almost lost my shit during the trial —he sighs—. It could be that his patient is going through something similar, but it's something she should want to work on to get an exact answer. Sorry if I'm not of help.

—No, it's alright —I stop him—. Do you know how the girl overcame it?

—No —he sighs again—. His parents told me she started going to therapy after the trial. But that's all I spoke with them —he makes a long pause—. Is this the only reason why you called me? What? Did you bet money?

That's better than letting him know my business, so...

—No, I just wanted to help Jimin out. Thought you'd know more about it, since you've worked with several abuse victims.

—I work with them to punish who's hurted them, not to help them to overcome their traumas.

There's a thick silence between us, before Yoongi gets called out by someone on the other side and has to hang up.

I huff, annoyed. I made that call for nothing.

And I'm probably thinking too deep into it.

✸ ✸ ✸

To be honest, it's been a fairly slow morning. At least until Mark showed up around eleven after his appointment. At least I had someone to bother, apart from Y/n, and to talk to in person. It also helps to have two customers after lunch to speed the afternoon. Before I realize it, I'm finished with the second customer, and now I only have to wait to get someone new to work on.

While I'm placing my sketchbook back on the shelf, I hear some noises from outside. Although, after thinking about it better, I end up assuming it's the entrance door to the studio. I stay still, wondering if there's someone in the entrance or not. I'm able to hear the sound of a pair of heels cracking against the floor, and I know it's not Mark.

I get up, ready to attend whoever is on the other side. But I freeze on the spot when I don't see a new customer in front of me.

What is she doing here?

All her face piercings are gone, and most of her tattoos are covered by the long sleeves of her red shirt -although I can catch a glimpse of some of the ink art on her hands. Her hair isn't blonde anymore, she's gone back to her natural dirty blonde color, that she's keeping mid tied.

—I was hoping to find you here —she whispers.

I don't even want to think why she might be looking for me. Honestly, I don't really want to have anything to do with her, and that's exactly why I'm trying to think fast to plan my escape away from this place.

—Leslie —Mark calls her behind me—. What are you doing here?

—Well, I'm back in New York —although she's speaking to Mark, she keeps her eyes on me while answering—, and thought of paying you a visit.

I can't help but scoff at that. When she left, she didn't care about us, about he studio or how fucked up we'd be with her clients and her absence. And now, all of a sudden, she thinks about us when she's back here? She has to be kidding me.

—I tried to tell you, but you changed your number —she lets me know.

After begging her to come back for weeks, I was able to move on and live my life without her. The last thing I needed was a call or text from her to fall back to the same shit.

—I also wanted to talk to you —she adds when she realizes I have no intention to speak.

—I have nothing to talk with you —I shake my head, trying to walk back to my room.

—I just want to apologize properly —I see her biting her lip nervously.

I shouldn't even think of going somewhere with her. Not when I planned on meeting up with Y/n in less than an hour.

—I think we both need to completely close this chapter —she keeps trying to convince me.

When I look at Mark, behind me, he's giving Leslie a rough look, which turns confused when I finally give in to talk somewhere else with her.

I think it would be a good idea to do this to leave behind whatever we had nine months ago. She probably needs it way more than I do anyway.

While we sit, I send a text to Y/n, letting her know I won't be able to make it to our plan later. Not because I'm planning on spending too much time here, but because I know I won't be at my best after I leave. And it won't be fair for Y/n to ruin her night with my bad mood.

—So? —I say, once I leave my phone to the side.

Everything starts well. Leslie seems genuinely regretful of what she did, and how everything went down between us. She keeps saying she's sorry, and how I deserved better than getting to know about her cheating the way I did.

—Were you planning on telling me? —I finally look at her for the first time— Or were you going to mess with him until you got bored, and then pretend like nothing happened?

—I was confused —she shakes her head—. I thought he'd be just a fling, but it started getting serious.

—And instead of telling me, you hid it until I walked in on you and him having sex in our bed —I tilt my head—. Not enough with that, you left without saying a thing. You left the studio, left my house... and you didn't care about what you were leaving behind, and what conditions you left everybody on.

—I regret that every day —she licks her lips—. That's why I needed to apologize to you.

—Apology accepted —I finally say—. Anything else?

—You're leaving already? —her eyebrows knit in the middle, as she looks at me.

—I have nothing else to talk with you —I cross my arms over my chest—. Besides, if you want to apologize to someone, tell Mark you're sorry for leaving the studio the way you did.

I get up, knowing damn well I have nothing else to say right now. I don't want to say anything else, to be honest. But my steps are stopped by her hand holding my wrist. She's looking up to me with pleading eyes, and it's right at this moment when I know an apology wasn't the only thing she wanted to talk to me about.

—I've really missed you these months —she assures me—. I was hoping...

—What? —I cut her off— Seeing me on my knees? Begging for you to come back after what you did? Leslie, it's a chapter closed for me. I only agreed on meeting you because it seemed like you needed to close it as well —I let go of her grip—. If it were for me, I'd have no need to see you ever again. What we had was over the second you chose to sleep with someone else.

—Are you dating someone?

—Yes —and while I'm answering that, I'm only able to think about Y/n and how I gave up spending time with her to be here—. And even if I weren't dating Y/n, I wouldn't go back to you.

I'm so enraged by what's going on, that I'm not even aware that I've let her name slip as I was talking about her like she was my girlfriend.

—Here —I throw a few bucks on the table to pay for my coke—. I'm leaving now.

When I step outside of the bar, and take my phone out of one of my pockets, I can see I have several texts from Soo -probably Mark told her I met with Leslie. She's probably going to be a pain in the ass when I see her. 

[madstronaut]

a little "palette" cleanser if you will 🎨 sorry i'll see myself out

obligatory faficowrimo masterlist link: https://www.tumblr.com/madstronaut/741107471699066880/faficowrimo-the-challenge-comment-on-every

Reading: imprimatura by @soapskneebrace (eowynstwin)

ahhhh one of the earliest soap fics i read and still makes me feel so tender and gooey when I think about it <3

I also loved how artist!reader’s first thoughts were “decadent muscle” HAHAHAHAHA SOAP WHO? I AM NOW CALLING HIM JOHN “DECADENT MUSCLE” MACTAVISH

“-his mouth rests at an angle that suggests he often smiles.”

fucking obsessed with this line!!!! what a description

Soap’s grip is firm, the kind of firm that suggests he can squeeze much, much tighter if he needs to. 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰yesplease

You turn his arm to see it more fully. “Oh. Nice tattoo.”

He looks at the ink as if it is entirely new to him, and then gives an easy grin. “Thanks. I’ve got a few more too. coughicanshowyounowprivatelycough Hope they aren’t hard to draw.”

this whole interaction has me shredding my pillow in my jaws - not letting go after a too long handshake? turning his arm to admire the tattoo? soap brain going brr and acting like he’s just seen his tattoo for the first time? RRRAGHAHHHGHG

i love how she clocks the colors for his eyes and skin and names of his specific muscles as they move too <3 ughh the artist reader is so well fleshed out which is a particular favorite of mine when it comes to fics <3

“It looks as if he’s moving around the sticks of vine charcoal with one outstretched finger; he pulls his hand guiltily away when you reenter the studio, crossing his arms over his chest as if to hide the evidence of his snooping.”

once again whoever at infinity ward came up with soap’s journal/sketches needs a fucking raise and promotion; it’s one of my favorite bits of canon about him and the idea of him picking it up again post-deployment just makes my heart absolutely a c h e

Beauty is cheap in art, but you notice it all the same—appreciate the strong brows, the hard angle of his jaw, the dark stubble of a beard you suspect he can’t keep shaved down, and the long scar that cuts through it across his chin. The light brown of his complexion is speckled with sun exposure, and there are the faintest of creases at the corners of his eyes, which you expect will deepen into genuine, gorgeous crow’s feet as he ages.

loved this whole exchange but that last line once again almost made me tear up knowing canonically, we won’t get the chance to see him age…but in fanfic we can and will 🥹🥹🥹

He looks at you, and catches your survey. You can see him realize you’d been watching, the knowledge of it blooming in ocean blue eyes like ink dropped onto linen.

obsessed with this last line. imho this whole fic and the way its written is a work of art itself 💙💙💙💙

And now he’s looking at you���attention flitting across your face, dropping down your body and jumping back up to meet your gaze. mmm soap can give me elevator eyes any time

His smile remains, cocksure and easy. “Let’s.” 

“That’s a shame. I’m right partial to it.”

the amount of rizz imprimatura!soap has got me full-body blushin i stg but also artist!reader setting him up to knock it out of the park with those comments? “we don’t do foreplay in this studio” MY SIBLING IN CHRIST DO YOU REALIZE THIS STATEMENT CANCELS ITSELF OUT

“There’s not a hard angle to you, all sweet and soft, but when you meet his gaze during introductions there’s a sharpness to you that skewers him through the chest.” i fucking loooooooove when writers describe the “at first sight” moments

The corners of your mouth tug upward, just a bit, and you look away, clearly bashful. Something in Soap’s chest starts beating a drum. my realtime reaction: 👅 👅 👅 👅🥰🥰🥰🥰 

“You should,” you say, and he looks at your thigh shamelessly as you pat it—even beneath your jeans, he can see the ripple of the impact. mm yes proud members of Thick Thigh Save Lives Club rise upppp

He can’t help it—Soap’s imagination runs wild. Titanic, draw-me-like-one-of-your-French-girls wild. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA this is canon to me you cannot change my mind

i am also loving the keep calm and carry on professionalism of artist!reader in the face of having to contend with seeing naked soap

he has to resist the urge to flex. Instead he watches you as you look at him.

these small revealing lil bits make me absolutely feral for this soap

He half-wishes he could step out of his body and join you, curious as he is about what you’re seeing, what your students will see. 

me too, sir, me too. i also love seeing artist!reader through soap’s eyes as well

“First time someone’s wanted to run away when I’m takin’ my clothes off, I won’t lie—” fucking CACKLING at this line

besides the absofuckinglutely incredible writing and fleshing out of this lil meetcute - i did see author's note that she drew on her own time as a fine art major <3 <3 <3 <3 and honestly some of the best stories ive read drew from IRL experiences by writers - but the suggestions and possibilities of this fic post-mwiii is what makes this such a favorite for me, peeking through a window into one of the what ifs? of another possible longer lifetime and lifeline for our beloved soap <3

so many chef's kisses and flowers being thrown at you from me bracey 💕💕💕

[inmaki]

anon who asked about yuuji here! mc lover anon, yuuji/yuuta anon??? whatever, anyways--

sorry if this seems intrusive but i just want to say, regarding the whole sukuna vs yuji thing, i think people need to be reminded of the fact that sukuna is using yuuji as a vessel, here. that body? abs and strong, angular jawline??? that's all yuuji. sukuna just... what? gave him tattoos?? and his hair got slicked back slightly. that's literally it.

(--below are manga spoilers--)

take megumi, for example. sukuna made my boy--and this is just my personal opinion, don't @ me pls--ugly. like, yuji with his hair slicked back was still okay, but megs? it didn't do it for me.

i felt the need to say this cause it genuinely baffles me whenever someone would pick sukuna over itadori, especially if looks are involved (assuming they're using yuuji's version of sukuna).

don't even get me started on his personality and list of crimes. but ig some people are into that...? idk, i won't say more, his fans might come at me for this 💀

i hope you don't mind me dropping in,,, i tend to talk a lot, my bad. thanks for answering my previous ask! i appreciate it

YUJI LOVER ANON AAAHH HI bae u should just be my anon ur so fun to talk to :)) I DO NOT MIND U DROPPING IN AT ALL I WELCOME U HERE W OPEN ARMS <333 and thANK U for further proving my poimt agh i completely forgot to mention the whole thing abt yuji carrying sukunas design 😒 THE MEGUMI ONE TOOOO tbh i kinda forgot what it looks like in the manga but I MISS MY BABY MEGUMI <\3

if anyone comes at u i will block them ALL SUKUNA HATE IS WELCOME ON THIS BLOG ✊✊✊!!

[haintxblue]

I'm sorry about how hard everything has been. I can't imagine what you're going through. I can't help much, but would you accept some money to help pay for a private cremation? It really helped me grieve to have that for my cat, and I don't want that option to be taken from you because of the cost. I'm sorry if this is not welcome, of course feel free to delete this if it isn't.

hello, thank you for this!

So I imagine you found my cat updates. I guess I should add a current update to those: Things are still kinda up and down, she was doing better but now it appears her ear infection has drained into a sinus problem :/ but since her overall health is good and she's being managed well on a Lot of Expensive Drugs she's still kicking around and I'm still hoping she manages to stay well enough to just die in her sleep at home.

She's still eating, grooming, using her litter box, using her scratching post, walking around, demanding cuddles, and occasionally even playing (gently and briefly), so I'm not calling it quits yet but I am not optimistic of any long term recovery.

I have euth funds set aside from the fundraiser in case she goes very bad again or things get unstable but for now I do a weekly check in with her new vet and we assess her quality of life/treatment plan for managing symptoms in an attempt to keep her comfortable enough to die at home.

As to the cremation, which I know was the entire ask im so sorry I just wasn't sure what info you had and wanted to get that out there: this is an incredibly kind offer but I sincerely don't want or need a private cremation for her. I have a pretty unorthodox perspective on death and remains in general, human or animal, and while I know it helps the grieving process for others, for me it's really irrelevant. My One True Soul Cat was also sent off for community cremation and I never got her ashes either, and to this day I don't regret that.

If I had unlimited money I would probably still send her off for community cremation and not want any ashes. I know this might be genuinely upsetting to some so I'm sorry if that's also you but to be honest if I had unlimited money the only thing I'd even maybe consider is getting her skull cleaned and sent back somehow because she has a jaw deformity I'd like to see up close.

This is sort of a family trait. My mom and I both want to donate our bodies to science and neither one of us wants a funeral. Neither of us likes to keep ashes. She didn't even keep her husband's ashes or my brother's.

If I decide I want a memorial of some kind I'll get a tattoo. She has a deformed foot with a very unique footprint so probably that's what i would get.

Sorry I'm rambling so much she's just sleeping next to me right now so I have a lot of complicated emotions :(

tldr thank you for this incredibly kind offer but I don't skip the private cremation because of funds, but because I don't want anything else.

[poppunkandalphabetsongs]

Love & Marriage.

“The view from here is getting better with you by my side.”

Marriage. I’ve created a business around celebrating the act of that. In bringing two people together legally, in front of their loved ones, and friends. In front of their appropriate religion, and community. In front of their pets and their children. It’s been thoroughly enjoyable for the most part. I’ve wanted to quit a lot, currently I’m in that void, but you can’t quit a business where you have bookings 2+ years in advance, unfortunately. One of those asking the universe questions mentioned in previous tangent. 

I’ve always wanted to be married, which is strange as my Mother is on her 7th, and I’ve had no real example of what a healthy marriage should be. Most of the people who I know deeply enough to be able to justify judging their marriage, shouldn’t be married. It’s kind of an interesting concept. “Let’s get the government involved in our love story, otherwise, it doesn’t mean enough.” I don’t genuinely believe that statement, but sometimes, like right now, it doesn’t seem wrong. 

I’ve found myself married and questioning life. I married my husband for numerous reasons, but when things get low and dark, I find myself very much alone and that’s what I thought wouldn’t happen with marriage. I thought it was a team project. I thought you got an instant best friend. I thought it was unconditional love. But I do know there is no such thing as unconditional love. Even your children love you conditionally. As much as I hate to admit it, I know that even my dogs will go to whatever condition suits them the best. It’s a quality that I can’t judge. We all want what’s best for ourselves. We are a selfish breed by nature. It’s not going to change. 

There’s some statistic online that states there could be over 100+ soulmates for every person alive. As you age, you change, you adjust, you mimic the life that you feel as though you need to, in order to survive whatever state of life you’re going through. I’ve never met anyone who was the same when I first met them. I know I’ve changed within this last year. Clearly I’m still involved in that evolution, and I’m sure I’ll have a dozen more before the end of my natural life. Is it fair to make one person be the right person for you forever? Did I bully my husband into choosing marriage because at that time he felt like I was the one? Did I bully myself into thinking it would be the end of all of my loneliness? 

“Please don’t go, I love you so. I’ll eat you whole.” 

One of my favorite love poems is called “Please Keep Loving Me” by Eric Victorino. I’m surprised I haven’t gotten anything from it tattooed on my body. But you know what he did? He left the woman he wrote it for. He began a whole new life with someone else, they started a family, and he’s a different person than he was when he wrote that. I wonder if he quotes it to his new love. Thanks to social media for being able to creep on all of my literary heroes. The point isn’t that he’s changed, the point is, that everyone does. Is it fair to ask someone to keep loving you through all of the shit? 

I think the worst is, that I realized I was a toxic person this year. At age 31. I realized I was very much the problem for the majority of the personality traits I thought were just natural. A good therapist helped me get diagnosed with an accurate diagnosis this year, which has allowed me to place blame on some of the characteristics I hate the most about myself onto it. Am I doing anything to change them? Some days, yes. Other days, no. 

Is my toxic ass behavior healthy for my husband? Is it fair for him to have to deal with this? Just because he signed a paper stating that he knew what he was getting into? Because he stood in front of our current friends and family and said some vows that he probably regrets now? Because we made a child together? 

What happens when you both feel as though you both have serious things that need to be fixed, but can’t communicate with each other in a healthy way about it? A lot of questions for the universe tonight. 

“With a sad heart I say bye to you, and wave. Then she whispered, ‘how could you do this to me?’ Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you.”

[palettes-and-prompts]

Character Palette/Personality Palette

If I have seen the movie/show/or whatever this character is in I will let you know! But if I haven't I'm just gonna give my best guess to their personality or what I think they like and everything. I will make them two palettes, one based on their appearance and one based on what I think their personality is. If you'd rather not see this just block the tag "character palette and personality guess" I figure no one's tagging anything like that so it should be easy to filter out. If you genuinely like this character and I roast them please understand this is all for fun and it’s just a joke. If you wanna send me a character for a palette and my guess at their personality/interests just drop it on anon or off anon and I'll see what I can do.

Alright so this Satsuki Ito from the Japanese media mix project Paradox Live. I've never heard of it until now but I saw this character and immediately got excited. I can't wait to go in on this man. Let's fucking get into it!

First of all, love his color palette. So sick. Whoever designed him needs a raise. The hair, the color choices, the tattoo placements and the jewelry? Amazing. That being said this is such a fuckboy fit. I love it. This man would cheat on you with someone who looks just like you and find a way to make you believe it's your fault. He definitely borrows money from his girlfriend but doesn't pay her back. He vapes, I can literally smell the mango through the screen. He looks dumb but in a fun way. This is such a trailer park kind of look too. Like, I see him idolizing his big brother who taught him how to turn an apple into a bong. This is such a smoke-weed-out-of-a-crushed-coke-can kind of vibe. I can smell the bottle of 3 in 1 he uses in the shower. Like, I smell it through the screen just barely covered by the intense scent of like axe body spray. All of his money goes into vape juice or video games. He either delivers pizza, works in fast food or works at a gas station. I feel it, I feel like I've fucking seen him at one of those places. He doesn't live with his parents either, he lives with his grandma who's just really normal and she has no idea what a soundcloud rapper is but she's still proud of him anyway cause he's like her only grandson who hasn't went to jail yet and is the only who's able to kind of hold down any kind of a job. But he acts so hard around his friends saying shit like "Yeah, we should go beat the shit out of him right now!" and then his grandma is like "Did you just cuss in my house?" and he instantly goes all soft like "N-No, ma'am!" and he sets the table for supper and shit. I'm not gonna lie, I like him. And the more I look at him the more he's growing on me. I can see him getting his own car, it's not perfect but it's his and it's got the back lights busted but all taped up. He'll probably end up with the first woman he gets pregnant. And he'll be like "How can it be mine? I used the pullout method." and his grandma will be like "You'd better do the right thing." and he ends up marrying her and names the kid something stupid and he doesn't know a fucking thing about babies but he's really good at being a dad. He's the kind of guy who'd buy his child Jordans even though they can't walk yet and will grow out of them way before they even can. His favorite movies are the Fast and Furious movies. Tokyo Drift is definitely his second favorite one just underneath whichever one has The Rock in it. His theme song would probably be Tipsy by J-Kwon.

Anyway here's his palette based on his character design.

And here is his palette based on what I think his personality is.

[wooahaes]

i have a friend who did the same, her mum and dad do not like tattoos so she got a very small one in a place they'd never see </3

thank u!!! i want some more :( and thank you so much, love 💝🥺🥺

omg yes 😭😭😭 i just watched that wine party clip and it's genuinely the funniest thing ever, just hoshi going WINE PARTY so confidently has me SCREAMING 😅

i watched a video of him get so offended with a carat when they said he wasn't their bias anymore 😭 i was like MY POOR BABY but honestly his reaction was so funny and cute :(( seen so many clips of him and fans on tiktok and HE'S JUST SUCH A CUTIE 💖 i biased jeonghan first and he's definitely still a big bias for me <///3

my disapproving ppl aren't ppl i live with/see super often, so i think as long as it isn't on like... an obvious part of my body, i should be good? if anything, i can probs get coverup for whenever i'm around them lol but i want like. a lil paopu fruit somewhere on me just bc kh is something deeply important to me. or maybe a lil sunflower? just a small thing that'll make me happy.

hoshi confidently being wrong is the energy i strive to have tbh... hoshi teach me ur ways thank u <3

omg... he can never find out tht i biased him when i was first getting into svt... esp because i left him for hoshi... and technically also woozi and vernon. i feel like one of those might be more forgivable based on how close he and vernon are but dsfkhsdf hes so cute tho!! i adore his reactions to things + he has like... the coziest vibes. i watched his vlive a few months ago when they were quarantining in japan and he had this whole lil moment of making a video message for asahi from treasure and it still warms my heart :( he's SO loving and supportive of other groups. i think he was the one who found out tht trsr was (lovingly, bc they're genuine fans of svt and gose) imitating the group a lil in a live once and started supporting them after he listened to their music. it was the same live he listened to jikjin during and im still like !!! over it. i need a treasure-seventeen interaction within the next year :(

i think for me it was genuinely seungkwan-joshua-vernon? bc i can't just pick one lmao. joshua bc he's the only man in the world who can understand sunday morning, seungkwan bc he's seungkwan who wouldn't love him, and vernon bc idk i just appreciate a lot of his down-to-earth, mature advice on things (like learning to not measure happiness and accept it as it is instead).

then hoshi horanghae'd his way into my heart and woozi went wooahae once and i was like oh NOOO my heart... and also wonwoo and vernon kind of fight for that top spot lmao men who love cats <3 (in all honesty tho: both of them are extremely hardworking people who are passionate about what they do. also they're both incredibly funny in their own ways. i've said it before, but having 3 biases in svt means that the rest of the group are bias wreckers lmao i love all of them a lot)

[chibinekochan]

Lilies and Thorns pt 6

part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 

Obey me! Masterlist

--------------------------------------------

Sadly, I can't come to any solution. 

I still like Diavolo, meeting my soulmate hasn't changed that at all. Maybe that is the most important part after all?

In these two days, I have seen how some Soulmate relationships are just not as they seem in shows or movies. 

Love seems to be more complex than tattoos on skin.

At some point, I stand up, shake my body, and stretch. Then I smack my cheeks and decide to make the most out of the upcoming pool party.

Love be damned! 

I giggle at that thought and find some slightly risky swimwear that makes me feel great when I wear it. 

I put a hoodie and some shorts over my swimwear. I want to give Diavolo a surprise reveal.

I arrive at the pool.  There are some people around it. Some are flirting, others are playing in the pool, and some just seem to relax.

I stroll around for a bit, looking for Diavolo. 

Then I spot Asmo, who is surrounded by people. Well, it's no wonder, he is very popular. Soon I also see Satan talking to some people. I didn't think that he would be so social. Maybe he was just moody last night. 

If these two are around then surely Lucifer can't be far away. Knowing well about the hijinks that the brothers are known to cause.

I try to spot the raven-haired male but when I find him my heart clenches. He stands with Diavolo.

They seem very much into their conversation. I don't feel like I should bother them. 

I decide on just getting a drink for now and wait for my chance.

Then Diavolo spots me and waves me over with an excited look on his face. A bit hesitant, I walk over to them.

"Ah, there you are, I have been looking for you." He is friendly as always and looks great in swim trunks. I admire his body for a brief moment.

"Hi Diavolo, Hello Lucifer." I smile at both of them.

"Hello, nice seeing you again. We were just about to wrap our conversation up so please enjoy your time." Lucifer seems a bit stiff around me. It's understandable, considering everything.

"We all need to get together at some point though." Diavolo is strangely insisting on this.

"I assume that you just want to show off but I will indulge you." Lucifer chuckles lightly and then turns to me. "You have to be careful around him. He is trouble." Lucifer sounds almost playful in his words. I can tell that he cares about Diavolo in his own way.

"I already know that much but I think I'm trouble for him too," I say, giggling slightly.

"Then he is in good company. We will see each other tomorrow, have fun." I somehow feel that Lucifer said this to approve of our relationship. Which is nice of him.

Lucifer then walks away, in the direction of his brothers.

"I'm no trouble at all I promise." Diavolo looks at me with big eyes. "Somehow I can't believe it but we will have to see. Anyway, I hope I wasn't interrupting." I smile and address my worries.

"We were just talking about the past. Up until now, a lot has been left unsaid but now things are changing. I apologized to him for my awful timing and he apologized for being so brutal with me. I think now we can finally heal our relationship into a real friendship." Diavolo talks openly about this and it makes me feel good that he isn't hiding anything. 

One point still bothers me though. "Do you still have feelings for him?" 

"For a long time I thought I did but now I know it was just a fantasy." Diavolo looks intently at me.

"How did you figure that out?" It makes me genuinely curious.

"Before I answer you, I must ask you about Barbatos. He told me that he is your soulmate. So now I have to know if that changed anything for you?" He looks very, serious, like he is bracing for a heavy impact. 

"I have no feelings for Barbatos if that's what you wish to know. I also have no interest in pursuing him either." I calmly and clearly state the facts.

Diavolo lets out a sigh of relief. Then all the trouble on his face disappears. "Great, in that case, let's enjoy the party." 

Diavolo holds his large hand out towards me and smiles like the sun. 

"Yes, let's go for a swim!" Full of excitement I undress my hoodie and shorts and Diavolo can now see my swimwear for the first time.

"You look marvelous!" His eyes are all over my body and he looks like he likes what he sees. It's a huge success for me.

"I'm glad you like it. I went riskier than usual but it was well worth it." I wink playfully at him.

"I'm quite honored, even when it troubles me that everyone can see you like this but then again I want to show everyone how amazing you look. Such an inner conflict." Diavolo looks a bit troubled. I find this very adorable.

"Don't worry I got only eyes for you, besides no one will look when we swim." I genuinely smile at him. Feeling such warm joy in my heart.  I finally take his hand and drag him with me.

He is a bit surprised but seems to like it. I enter the nice pool water. "Diavolo come in, the water is gorgeous." I lure him in with a sweet voice.

Diavolo doesn't hesitate and follows me into the water.

I then take the opportunity to splash him and laugh.

"Hey, you didn't warn me about this!" He laughs at my unexpected move. Diavolo tries to splash me back with water but I avoid getting hit.

I giggle and start to swim away. "Not so fast, Diavolo. First, you have to catch me." I stick my tongue out at him for good measure.

Diavolo laughs out loud and lunges at me, but misses and swims after me.

This chance goes on for a bit until he has me cornered. He is smiling brightly, his hair dripping wet and the sun makes his muscles almost shiny.

He looks at me intently, and our faces get closer and closer. My heart starts to hammer in my chest. His skin is touching mine just enough to feel his body heat. 

I shiver slightly anticipating his kiss. I can't believe how much I want it. 

Then someone bumps into Diavolo, causing both of us to break out of our trance. 

"This is a bad place for this." Diavolo sighs slightly. I had completely forgotten where we are. I now notice that we are surrounded by other people. I giggle when I realize that. "You are right." 

"We should head somewhere more private." Despite being this public Diavolo stays close to me. I hope he is just as reluctant as I am to let go. 

Before I can answer, I see Barbatos approaching us with quick steps. "My lord, I apologize but there is something that needs your attention." It looks like he is a bit bothered to interrupt us.

"I see, that sounds quite bad. I'm very sorry but I will have to take care of that." Diavolo looks deeply sorry. 

"It's alright, it must be very important. I hope I can see you later." I smile, feeling a bit disappointed but I understand. 

"I will solve whatever it is until the evening I promise." He sincerely smiles at me.

"That is a bold statement, my lord." Barbato snickers in the background.

"I will keep my promise." Diavolo doesn't take the bait and stays confident. 

"I will wait for you." I smile at him, I just can't help but believe him.

Diavolo gets out of the pool and heads straight into the mansion.

I leave the water as well and decide to take it easy with a book and a couple of drinks at the poolside.

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Im sorry that posting updates for this story is currently slow.