#the easiest thing is for me to go haha yeah my dad was kind of a dick and whooaaahhh so crazy i grew up mormon hahah! but its like no that

[zemnarihah]

much to think about.

[pricetheghost0]

⚠️MAJOR TW⚠️

Self harm (pretty gorey), suicide, abuse, sexual assault (implied but no detail), panic attacks (no detail really)

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This is a vent for me. This might be shitty but idc. I just needed to feel better.

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Words: almost 6k 😅🤠🫠

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Aizawa x Mic x Shinso x Eri x y/n (family)

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Y/n is abused by her parents and has to move into the dorms after villain attacks. She self harms but goes to far after remembering how bad her parents abused her. Aizawa finds her in her dorm and saves her. He adopts her into his family. Too bad she couldn’t take it anymore.

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Aizawa pov

Honestly… y/n is pretty special. Her quirk is good but her personality… used to be special, enchanting even. She was calming and kind.

Her quirk is called assassin. She can vanish into thin air. She is also super agile.

The reason her personality “used to be” anything is because she changed. She hid it well but I noticed. It wasn’t immediate. That would have been impossible. But after all the villain attacks and moving into the dorms it must’ve taken a toll on her.

I already knew something was up when her parents didn’t care if she moved to the dorms or not. She kept drinking whisky and brushing me off saying “kidnap her, enslave her, whatever I don’t care now get out and take that useless thing with you. She also makes for a good plaything~.” Her dad said with a wink.

It sent shivers of disgust down my spine. What father could think of their child like that.

Y/n pov

I hated the attacks. I hated that I wasn’t good enough. I hated that I couldn’t help Aizawa more. He was like a father figure even if I hadn’t known him for long.

I sat in class but it was hard to act as I always did. It was getting harder to wake up everyday. I would go back to my dorm everyday just to find my best friend in the drawer of my desk. That cold metal I rely on. My upper arms and hips were covered in old and new wounds. They were the easiest places to hide my scars.

I've been self harming since middle school. It’s probably already been 3 years. I was running out of space, and fast.

Time skip to class~

I walked into the classroom only to be greeted by Mina. She is my best friend but I started to get annoyed by her pushy personality. That kinda made me feel guilty.

“Hey! How ya doing?” Mina said loudly.

“I’m good! How about you?” I said with a huge fake smile plastered on my face.

“Goooood” she said, spinning around.

“SHUT THE HELL UP! IT'S TOO DAMN EARLY FOR THIS!” Bakugo shrieked.

“Tch” Mina sat down next to me.

Time skip….

3rd pov

You all went to lunch. Well… all accept you. You aren’t hungry anymore. Class is getting harder too. It makes you feel kinda stupid. Now you have a hunger for your blade.

“Maybe just a little” you say as you lock your door and grab your blade. You search for a place to slice like a goddamn cutting board.

“I mean… I already wore long sleeves knowing this day would come. Haha those dumbasses believe it’s better for my quirk.” You laugh to yourself.

You roll up your sleeve and position your blade. You slice and slice. Your skin screaming with pain telling you to stop. You could feel anything anymore. 1,2,3… you lose count. You grab a towel to catch the already rotting blood flowing from your forearm.

*knock*knock*knock*

“Y/nnnnnn” it’s Mina.

“Yeah” you say with a smile in your voice as you panic trying to stop the bleeding and roll down your sleeve.

“Aizawa needs you,” she says.

“Alright I’ll be out in a sec” you say putting the blade away.

You walk out and go to Aizawa classroom. For once he isn’t sleeping. Instead, he is standing and waiting for you.

“You wanted to talk to me?” I say with a smile.

“Are you doing alright?” He asks with a concerned face.

“Yeah why?” You say keeping your smile while internally screaming.

“You seem off. Not to mention your parents being the way they are.” Aizawa looked dead into your eyes.

Your smile dropped and you told him about the abuse. They hit you and broke bottles to slice you with. They starved you and made you pay for food and bills. Your father assaulted you and your mother sold you to different men so she could buy alcohol.

You told him everything except the toll it took on you. The fact that when people yelled, like Bakugo, you shook a little. The fact that you wanted to die and you self harmed. You didn’t even tell him about the full mental breakdown you had behind a rock in the USJ accident.

He sighs and thinks about what to say.

“Would you like to lock them away?” Aizawas eyes begged for the truth.

“Yes. To be honest I would hope they rot in jail.” You said with hatred piercing through the air.

Aizawa was a little shocked by the aggression coming from such a calm student but he felt the same. “Can I talk to Principal Nezu and the authorities about this then?”

“Yes.” You couldn’t stop thinking about the horrible things your parents did. As you walked to your next class you felt sick. Just the thought of your parents was enough to drive you mad.

“Mic…” you said, holding your stomach.

“Yes?” He then noticed how rough you looked. “You alright young listener?”

“I feel really sick. Can I go to my room to rest?” At this point you almost throw up. Flashbacks won’t stop playing in your head.

“Hey kid, you don’t look so-“ you pass out right in front of the poor guy. He panics and sends iida to get recovery girl.

Time skip—

Y/n pov

I slowly opened my eyes only to see Aizawa panda Principal Nezu talking to recovery girl. I can’t hear what they are saying but they stop when they notice I’m awake.

“How are you feeling hun” recovery girl has a concerned facial expression.

“Like I got hit by a truck.” I say running my fingers through my hair.

“You seem to have fainted due to shock.” Recovery girl said. Aizawa looked guilty.

“Aizawa, it’s fine. I had to say it at some point. Are they at least going to be locked up?” I drink some water.

“I’m still sorry y/n. I didn’t mean to push you and yes they will be locked away.” Aizawa choked back tears.

“Thank you.” A real and small smile showed on my face.

*******

You ran back to your dorm. You needed more from that blade. You haven’t gone past styro. Most of the time you did little cat scratches though. This time you had enough. You locked the door, grabbed your blade, and then sat in the corner. The memories of your parents and the embarrassment of passing out was too much.

You began slicing your upper arms and forearms. Each cut was deeper than the last. First it was cat scratches since you were afraid of what you could do in this state of mind. Then you slowly gave in and did styros. This pissed you off.

“Is that it? Is this all I can do?” You thought as you completely snapped.

All of a sudden you heard a louder slit sound from the blade ripping through your skin. You looked at your forearm only to see a deep cut showing the fat layer.

It throbbed. Pain was shooting into your head and you were bleeding… a lot. You panicked and that made it bleed more. You were scared. You pushed a towel on it to stop the bleeding.

*knock*knock*knock*

Shit.

What do I do now?

Fuckkkk.

——————

Aizawa watched as you left. He saw something in your eyes he knew about. When he was younger he self harmed. He knew the blood lust he felt all those years ago. He saw the exact same bloodlust in your eyes. Nezu talked to him as he was slowly losing patience. Aizawa knew he needed to get to you and fast. Before you did something dangerous. He finally lost it.

“The police will need your statement. They will be here in-“ Nezu was silenced.

“Ok ok ok I need to go. It’s important. I’ll be with y/n so you can send them to her dorm if they won’t already be there.” Aizawa panicked.

“Why would the police-“ Nezu couldn’t finish because Aizawa had already left running down the hall. That brings us to the present.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Aizawa pov

When I knocked on her door I heard sniffles and shuffling. I also heard some mumbling that I could make out. Did she do what I thought she would do? Is it as bad as I thought? Is she ok?!

“Y/n please open the door.” I know a few more times.

You heard Aizawa's concerned voice. All you could do was feel guilty. You made this teacher, who already had to deal with the press and paperwork from the attacks, sorry about you. At the same time you were almost glad he came. You couldn’t manage to speak. Hell, you were about to pass out due to blood loss.

I hear the door unlock and a thud. At that moment I knew for a fact that she had passed out. I opened the door slowly to make sure I wouldn’t hit her. I then saw her as I looked at the floor. I immediately called for an ambulance.

I put the phone on speaker and dropped my phone and my knees to the floor. She hit an artery.

“FUCK” I couldn’t hold my tears in. This drew the other students' attention. Thank god for Iida who gave me and y/n some space as I held a half soaked towel to her arm. There were whispers making it obvious no one knew about her “habit”. Scars both new and old were on display for these poor students to see. A few people were crying on the floor. A few people were too shocked to feel any kind of emotions. Others comforted the ones on the floor even though they were crying too.

The ambulance quickly came and it was easy to find out where they should go since they saw the group of crying students at the door ready to lead them to another group of stunned and crying students.

I rode in the ambulance with y/n. I couldn’t hear the emts muffled questions through my own questions.

Why didn’t I notice sooner?

Why did I not run after you sooner?

My thoughts immediately stopped as we got to the hospital. They took you away from me. I had unconsciously thought of you as my own daughter. You were the person I felt the most comforted by. We had a similar story.

My heart shattered more as more time passed. I needed a sign. I needed a doctor to walk out of those doors and say everything was going to be ok.

I heard a door open and I weakly looked up. The door had opened countless times and still no news. All of class 1a walked through the door. Their faces were red and puffy but they calmed down a little more. They all sat down waiting. For once this class of cheery, optimistic hero’s was quiet. They were too stunned to speak.

Nezu walked through the door. I was too drained to greet him. He walked right up to me. Midnight, mic, and all might were talking to all the other students. They wanted to make sure we were all fine. Mic wanted to talk to me but he was on the verge of tears already. If he saw me, his husband, this broken he would lose it.

3rd pov

“Is this what you meant? Did you know this would happen?” Nezu asked with a serious tone.

“Yes. I had a feeling when I saw the bloodlust, all so familiar to me, in her eyes.” I could hear mic choking back sobs from the other side of the room. He knew exactly what I was talking about. He had helped me through a lot and never thought y/n would be the same.

“That’s all I needed to hear.” Nezu sat down next to Aizawa. Now there were 25 people waiting for the news that you were fine.

After another silent half an hour the doctor walked through the big metal doors. It had been 3 hours of waiting and finally you got to hear the news.

“Who’s here for y/n” the doctor said, a little shocked by how many people were in the waiting room on a slow night. (Never say it’s slow in a hospital)

Everyone jumped up looking at the doctor with eyes that were pleading to know if you were ok.

“We all are sir,” Aizawa said.

“O-oh sorry. Well I came to inform you that y/n is all stitched up and will make a great recovery. She might need physical therapy but we won’t know until she wakes up. She lost a lot of blood so we thank you sir for donating some of yours.” The doctor looked at Aizawa. Of course he would help his student. Especially since he thought of her as his own daughter.

Everyone let out a sigh of relief. It was like those words were the reason we could breathe again. We all had tears. Some were sobbing.

“W-when can we s-see her” Mina said through her sobs.

“Only one person can see her at a time and only two should visit her tonight. Like I stated earlier, she is asleep and it’s best for her to stay that way.” The doctor said calmly.

The group decided Aizawa and Mina should go. After all, Mina is your best friend and Aizawa is the one who found you.

Mina walked with the doctor and was left alone after being greeted by an officer who was guarding y/n from herself. She stood outside of the door. She was heartbroken by the fact that she had to guard a girl the same age as her daughter from herself. She was happy to see that a huge group of people came to see you.

Mina cried and asked your sleeping body why you would do such a thing. She talked about how everyone reacted and left after telling you to wake up and be ready for a fresh new start.

Aizawa greeted the officer and then walked into your room. He cried and told you about himself and his journey through mental illness. Little did he know, you heard everything. It took everything in you to not cry in his arms. You didn’t want to overstep your boundaries because you didn’t want to possibly make him upset.

Once he walked out of the room the police officer walked in. She saw that you were awake and sitting up while you held your head because it was throbbing.

“Hey, how ya feeling hun?” She said sweetly while taking the chair next to you.

“Everything hurts,” you said weakly. “Am I in trouble?”

“No sweetheart.” The officer giggled a little. “I’m Hana Shiozaki. I’m here to keep you company. We want to make sure you're doing ok.”

“Like Ibara Shiozaki?”

“Yes. She is my daughter!” She said cheerfully.

You stayed up for hours talking about UA and the attacks and everything else. You got so comfortable with her that you were able to talk to her about the abuse you endured without feeling as upset as you were earlier. She felt as safe as Aizawa but this time you were ready to talk about it.

Shiozaki cried and held you as you told her about the abuse. You cried in her arms and fell asleep. She lashed you down and after an hour she switched with another officer so she could go home and come back in the morning.

“””””””””””””””

Y/n pov

I wake up low key forgetting where I am. Shiozaki walks into the room looking tired. I feel kinda bad for her because she has to watch over me.

Thoughts swarm my mind. “Burden” “disgusting” “waste of time” “you should add more scars” “you’ll be fine since your in a hospital”

Shiozaki notices your panicked look. She walks over to you calmly.

“Good morning y/n” she smiles.

“Good morning” I yawn.

“What’s going on inside your pretty little head? You seem upset” she has a worried expression.

“Nothing much haha” I can’t help but laugh nervously.

“You can tell me what’s bothering you. I want to help. I’m sure the man standing outside of the door would also like to know.” She says while stroking your hair.

“Huh? What man?” I shook a little thinking it was my dad or something.

Aizawa walks through the door. He kneels by your hospital bed and puts your hand up to his forehead. He starts to tear up.

“Y/n… please… why” his mind spirals and you start to cry holding his and Shiozakis hands.

“Do you really want to know? It’s so dark and sad. It’s not fun to listen to.” You say trying to keep yourself together.

They both nod and you take a deep breath. Shiozaki brings Aizawa a chair and you start to talk. They were ready for the worst. They knew this wouldn’t be some measly boy trouble or friend group drama.

“Sometimes I sit there and think. It’s so hard to live a life where your own parents aren’t there to care for you but to kill you. I’m pretty much a slave. I’m like a sex doll and a punching bag. I’m an expensive 2 for 1 deal. I guess I’m not that expensive since they only spend money on themselves and I get the leftovers.” You bitterly smile at your own sick joke.

“It’s so painful waking up everyday wishing that you hadn’t. It’s so painful to lose all the feeling left. It’s not painful anymore to dig sharp metal into your own flesh. It’s not painful anymore to have a man violate me. It’s not painful anymore to be strangled” your vision gets blurry from tears. You start to shake like a mini earthquake and then your vision gets darker out of pure rage.

At this point both adults don’t know what they are feeling. They are so blindsighted by rage and sorrow and pity that they are lost. They are crying softly to themselves. They let you continue so you can get these emotions off your chest.

“I’m covered in scars. I made most of them but some of them are from when men ‘had too much fun’ with me.” Aizawa gritted his teeth. He was so mad that someone so young had to deal with this.

“Another few scars were from my failures. My mother threw a knife at me when I burnt her burger. My dad threw a bottle at me. It smashed against my back and the glass cut me. The alcohol still in it burned the cuts as it trickled down. He did it because I wasn’t mopping fast enough. He blamed the wasted alcohol on me and I had to clean the house while doing a handstand for hours.” You bitterly laughed at how ridiculous you sounded.

“The cuts all over me sting every now and then as a reminder. It helped me in a sick way. It helped me stay in my head so I wouldn’t say anything I would later regret. If I replied with anything other than ‘no sir’, ‘yes sir’, ‘no ma’am’, or ‘yes ma’am’, implying I had an opinion of my own, they would punish me. That could mean a whole other world of things. This could mean I would have to sleep out on the back porch nude in the winter or sunbathe on a secluded part of the roof nude in the summer until I burnt. My parents actually encouraged my self harming. They praised it and said I deserved it. They even bought sharp knives for me to ‘try out’” I cried and all of a sudden the heart monitor which had once been stable started to go off.

You were having a flashback. You weren’t in the hospital anymore. You were back at your house. Back before you ever went to UA. Your mother locked you in a room with some unknown ugly looking man. You knew exactly what was happening. He was going to play with you. You waited for your impending doom and all of a sudden you were pulled out of the memory.

Aizawa was there hugging you as the heart monitor calmed down. The hospital's social worker used his quirk to stop the memory and force you back into reality. This causes you to want to sleep. It was exhausting. The worst part was that the therapist had to see what your memory was to bring you out of it. Shiozaki looked to see the therapist shaking. He could feel that you were used to this. He could feel the pain you were feeling. This all added up and he fell to the floor. He was new and wasn’t used to this awful sight and feeling.

Shiozaki took the therapist away and Aizawa stayed with you while calming you down. He eventually laid you down and hummed you a lullaby until you fell asleep. He stared at your puffy eyes and wiped your tears away. He left the room and saw your classmates. He told them it wasn’t a good time and that you needed rest. They all tried to argue but gave up and went to the dorms once Aizawa snapped and told them to leave.

Aizawa didn’t mean to snap. He was just so angry that you were in this state. He was angry that your memories even made the poor therapist cry. He knew what he should do and called Mic.

“Helloooooo” Mic screamed into the phone. “How’s our little y/n?”

“Please don’t yell.” Aizawa sighed. “Can you come down here. I wanna ask you something in person.”

“Alright I’ll be right down!” He said cheerfully. He was just glad to hear his husband's voice after being so quiet yesterday.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Present mic pov

I got to the hospital. I never liked being here. It was so sad and I have to remember Shota being here because he tried to overdose. It sends a shiver down my spine every time.

I turn the corner to see Shota, an officer, and a therapist. They all had puffy eyes. This isn’t good.

“What happened?” I try to speak quietly.

“Looks like she’s got some pretty awful trauma. She had to be pulled out of a flashback which was bad enough to make this young man cry.” Shota said with his typical tired voice with an added sniffle. My heart drops. I can’t believe things could be so bad.

“I was talking to this lovely officer about how we could help. This is where I wish to talk to you.” Shota grabs my hand and pulls me to the side. “I was thinking… What if we adopted her? Of course we will have to talk to Shinso but I think it would be a good idea. Her parents are getting arrested as we speak and I already think of her as my own daughter.”

“I’m fine with it as long as Shinso and y/n agree.” I am glad he thinks the same way I do.

Dunno the pov anymore

Once you wake up, mic and Aizawa talk to you about your parents being found and arrested as well as the men who assaulted you. They then continue to ask how you are feeling and ease your concerns. They have a nice talk and you already feel a tiny bit better. Then comes the big question. They already talked to Shinso and he was almost in your room. He walked in and you were slightly confused. You knew about their family. You just didn’t know why all of them were here.

“We have something to ask.” Present Mic smiles.

“We talked with Shinso as well.” Aizawa says calmly.

“Sorry this is so cheesy but they made me do this… would you like to be my sister?” Shinso said, embarrassed that he had to be there at all. It was all pretty cringy. He had no clue why his dads would adopt a student out of the blue since he didn’t know your story other than the fact that you tried to commit.

You were shocked. You were too numb to cry but you were so happy that you almost caved.

“W-what?” You needed a reality check. ‘Is this even real?’ You thought.

“We want to adopt you. However, the decision is all yours.” Aizawa said with pleading eyes. He really didn’t want to give you a choice. He wanted to help you and wanted you to be his own daughter to teach you the love of a real dad. Not some chewed up trash you called ‘dad’ in the past.

“I would love to!” You hugged your two new parents and Mic told Shinso to join the hug since you would soon be a part of the family. Shinso awkwardly hugged you and his dads while cringing.

“So uh… why are we adopting her?” Shinso said, not meaning to break the happy atmosphere.

You look down and grit your teeth. You pull yourself together and tell him the bare minimum. You were trying to ease the pain both on you and your new family. This made Shinso livid. How could someone do that? This is where protective Shinso kicked in. He comforted you and shocked his parents in the process. They had no idea how comforting Shinso could be until now.

Time skip ^~^

You got out of the hospital and everyone kept an eye on you so they could possibly come that close to losing you again. It turns out your parents associated with the LOV. This was hard for you to deal with so you turned to the blade, being extra careful on placement and depth. You didn’t want what happened in the past to happen again.

You were officially adopted by the two teachers and Shinso helped with your panic attacks when you occasionally called him. Turns out he was amazing at this whole comforting thing and would immediately run to you when you needed it. Of course you still had relapses but no one knew that. You didn’t want to hurt them.

The difference is that you relapsed less and you could actually smile a real smile. You were happy even though you had your moments. When Eri was adopted you were the best sister you could be. You protected her and helped her panic attacks like Shinso would do for you. Aizawa would look at you with pride, he was happy that you found peace.

After a while your family found out about your relapses and kept a closer eye on you but they comforted you. They made you feel alive. That was until your metal health got twisted out of nowhere. You fell deep into the dark. You tried to tell your dads about it and they comforted you well.

“D-dads. Can I talk to you guys?” You were nervous about how to say you were getting worse.

“Of course love!” Mic said as both of them dropped what they were doing once they heard your tone of voice.

“What is it hun?” Aizawa said sitting down with you on the couch followed by Mic on the other side of you.

“I want to die.” You didn’t know how to say it any other way. You had to say it bluntly or you wouldn’t have been able to say anything at all.

“I-“ Mic pulled you into a hug. Eri overheard this small conversation.

“Is this why you slice your skin and cry at night?“ Eri asked while walking over. Everyone was stunned.

“W-what.” You were upset with yourself for letting her see that even if it wasn’t your fault. Your dads had no idea what to say.

“I wanted to die too when I was with those villains. I don’t feel it anymore since you made me feel better!” Eri said, sounding sickeningly innocent.

“Baby you felt that way?” Aizawa asked, tearing up about this whole situation.

“Oh my god..” Mics breath was taken away.

Of course Shinso walked in when everyone was crying.

“Did I miss something? Should I be crying too?” Shinso said confused and walked over to the group of crying family members.

“Well I guess at least 2 of the 5 people in this room want to die.” You laugh at the pathetic situation.

“WHAT? WHO?” Shinso is confused.

“Me and Eri. At least Eri doesn’t want to anymore.” You say going back to crying.

Now Shinso has joined the group that is crying. He begged you to stay safe and begged Eri to not think like that. He was a mess. His dads remembered the suicide attempt Aizawa made and regretted. They begged you to stay with them.

Pathetic time skip T~T

This helped a lot but not enough. You felt like you couldn’t carry on any more. You were haunted by nightmares and panic attacks and you felt pathetic when someone had to calm you. Especially when Mina comforted you since she would end up in tears every time.

It was going to be hard on everyone but you gave up the moment your parents became horrible to you at 5 years old. You wrote out a note and grabbed your anti depressants. Funny how you were gonna die by the hands of something that was meant to make you not want to die. Just to make sure you snuck a bottle of vodka into your room to down the pills with.

You had sworn to never drink because of your parents who were rotting in jail just like you wanted but it didn’t matter anymore. You were going to die so who cares if you drink. You started writing the note your family would have to read.

“To my amazing family,

Please know that you made my life so much better. You made me happier than I could have ever been. I’m sorry it has to end like this but I can’t take it anymore.”

A tear drips onto the page. You really didn’t want to die but you thought it would fix everything. You wouldn’t be a burden on your family and friends. They wouldn’t have to strain themselves or drop everything to comfort you. They wouldn’t have to spend their hard earned money on you. Then you continued.

“I’m so grateful for your help. Shinso, you have been the best brother. You always helped stop my panic attacks and flashbacks when our dads were busy teaching.

Aizawa, you have been an amazing dad. Your steaks were the best tasting things in the world. Your comforting was just what I needed to get this far. But this is as far as I’ll go.

Mic, you were great at cheering me up. The car rides we went on while blasting music was so much fun. You really brightened the mood whenever I was down. Too bad my mood could only be lifted so much.

To my little baby sister Eri, I hope you grow to know how to use your quirk. You’ve already made so much progress and it makes me so proud. I hope you never feel like I do right now ever again. The world may be painful so you must become a light for the world.

To Mina, you have been a great friend. I also considered you a sister. You helped me even when you didn’t know how. You have been amazing to me. I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You made class more fun with the notes you handed me. It was really hard trying not to laugh in the middle of class. (Sorry Aizawa and Mic school in general bores me)

To class 1A, you guys were a lot of fun to be around. We fought really well together. You guys are super strong and I know you’ll make super amazing hero’s one day. Treat this as the disappearing part of my quirk. I will always be there watching. Who knows, I might even smack you guys around if you feel down haha.

Thank you all! Really… I needed you guys. I’m sorry again for having to do this. I would have been long gone by now without you all. Please don’t be too sad. I’m just going on a road trip… to the after life. Don’t worry though!! I’ll bring souvenirs if I get to come back!”

You needed to add a small joke. Duh! Then you cried a bit. Silently of course. You locked your door before writing the note so that was one less worry. You folded the note into a cute heart. You opened the bottle of vodka, getting a whiff of the poisonous drink. You cringed a little and then took a sip. You were too numb to feel a thing.

You opened the bottles of pills and got ready. You dumped the pills into your hand and chugged some vodka. You got more and more numb the more vodka you consumed. You left the other third of the bottle to swallow. You shoved the pills into your mouth and swallowed them with more alcohol. You felt dizzy from the intoxication.

Then your stomach churned. Your head was pounding and your limbs were going numb.

*THUMP*

Everyone heard your body hit the floor except for Eri who was a heavy sleeper.

“Y/n? You ok?” Aizawa asked.

“…”

“Y/n, please answer” mic pleaded.

“…”

“Fine!” Shinso banged on the door but couldn’t break it down.

Aizawa stepped up to break the door down. “Mic, call an ambulance. NOW!”

The door broke off its hinges. They saw you. Laying on the floor. Lifeless.

They all froze as Mic told the emergency operator to hurry. Aizawa dropped to his knees next to you checking your pulse that had disappeared. He started crops and Shinso grabbed the heart shaped note. He read it out loud and then they noticed Eri, who had woken up from the banging and yelling, standing at the doorway crying.

She had listened to the note and watched as you were taken away. She was destroyed along with the rest of your family. She swore to help anyone who felt that way. She swore to carry on and help her family. Aizawa impatiently waited to hear the doctor say you were ok. He wanted to make things better. He wanted to fully heal you this time.

Mic promised to never let you leave his sight. He begged whatever god he needed to, to make sure you would be ok. Shinso was left as an empty shell. He felt angry and confused. He couldn’t fathom losing you. He couldn’t help but cry and look at the ground.

What they didn’t know was that you were watching this. It was like an out of body experience. This confused you. It made you wonder if you succeeded. You actually regretted doing this. Then everything went black.

*beep*beep*beep*

“A heart monitor?” You thought. “Am I still alive?”

You open your eyes to see that you fell asleep at your desk. The beeping was your alarm clock. You looked around and realized that My Hero Academia was still just a show. You noticed a pen in your hand.

That was the last line of our story… but it wasn’t real. It was just me and a pen and paper. I wrote it all…(@Katelyn on tik tok p.s. I couldn’t find her normal @)

How can something feel so real but be nothing but a dream. Truly I wish I never woke up if it meant I got to be with them. (@Bash11_13 on tik tok)

Your heart shattered when you heard your mom screaming at you to get ready because another man was coming by to “play” with you…..

[wildcxrds]

{Jacob, do you consider yourself to be more like your mother or your father? Which of their traits do you like most about in yourself? Conversely, which of them do you like least about in yourself?

Alex, which type of magic did you find hardest to learn? Which type came naturally? Do you have a favorite or a preference?}

Jacob: Man… I consider myself more like my mum.

Personality wise, I got stuff from mum, for sure. I don’t have her temper (most times), but I definitely have a lot of the concern, the protectiveness, the curiosity, the anxiety. (Alex: Hey! ….. yeah, it’s true.) And her love of bad dad jokes.

I look like mostly dad, but I got mum’s hair and her nose. I also have birth marks and moles all over like her, which is funny. I really like that I have dad’s eyes.

I like the way my magic manifested. I have both of them to thank for that. I don’t use a focus like mum because of dad’s side, but I still love using spell books and components and my magic is like hers - all wispy - but because my aura is blue (Tia Allie told me that!) it comes out blue! Mum’s is gold.

The thing I don’t like… mmf, I dunno. I feel guilty saying this but… the anxiety, because it causes the Jotun part in me to trigger. And when the Jotun form comes out it’s… kind of painful for me. And scary.

—

Alex: Oof, using my focus (my wand) outright was hard until I was 19. But the hardest kind of magic for me was offensive magic. Using spells for fighting was difficult to control, more when I was younger, because I was always scared of it blowing up. And if you don’t have a steady handle of your focus, the magic could either not work or just go out of control. Kori helped me refine this and my defensive magic a lot when I moved to New York.

The easiest and most natural was my potion making - My mom told me that my great grandmother was a spell maker and a potions master, so I guess I inherited that skill from her. It also takes a little more than just throwing ingredients together, you have to make sure you enchant it right or the effectiveness is too low or dangerously high. And I just always got a handle of doing that just right since I was young. Semantic enchanting of potions was just easy, which is ironic considering how much I struggled with other enchanting or use of spells outside of that. But I got the handle of it eventually.

A preference? Honestly, I like using my magic for doing things like conjuring. Don’t get me wrong, I like potion making, of course but... making little orbs of light or little fireworks shows without the loud noise? That’s pretty cool.

I used to do things like that for Jacob when he was younger. Flashy stuff to give him little light shows to cheer him up when he was down.

Maybe it’s the Leo in me, haha.

[phantomrose96]

Fenton Fact

Danny leaned back against the red brick chimney of the Casper High roof, and he looked across the stretch of land rolling far off from the building top. For a place so off-limits, so hidden-away from the normal bustle of the school, the view really wasn’t anything special. Sure, the school was decently tall, but it overlooked the staff parking lot, and the empty Casper High tennis courts, and the back of a strip mall two blocks over with the recently-haunted laundromat.

Not that it mattered. It took more than tall-building-views to impress Danny anyway, even the nice ones. And he wasn’t up here for the view.

Danny let his eyes drift shut.

“Sup loner, room for one more?”

Danny startled, and it wasn’t Sam’s voice specifically that startled him. (He’d grown used to her bursting from his Fenton Phone earpiece during most nightly patrols.) He’d just lulled himself a bit too comfortably into the idea that no other human could follow him to the top of the locked rooftop of the Casper High building.

“Did I just surprise a ghost?” Sam asked. “Should I do it again with a ‘boo’?”

“Haha,” Danny answered with a fake chuckle. He blinked himself back to prickly awareness, drowsiness batted away like dust bunnies, and stared up at Sam. “I’m not surprised. I just wasn’t expecting anyone else to be on the roof. How did you even—”

Sam was a few steps ahead of him. In explanation, she waggled the Fenton-branded grappling hook gripped in hand.

Danny leaned back with a faux-exasperated sigh. “Since when do you even have a grappling hook?”

“Since I told your mom it would be a wildly cool line of gear to add to the Fenton brand.”

“Does this mean my mom now has a grappling hook too?”

“Yes. And your dad. And Jazz. And Tucker.”

“Great. When I go home and all the ceiling fans are torn down I’ll know why.”

A gentle silence lapsed over them, punctuated with the swell of fall wind.

“So…” Sam continued. “Can I sit here?”

“Huh?” Danny looked at her, anchoring his drifting thoughts once more. “Oh, yeah. I thought the ‘yeah’ was implied.” Danny shuffled a bit to the side, back still resting against the chimney. He patted the spot he cleared. “What am I gonna tell you? No?”

“Just making sure.” Sam stowed the grappling hook to the side of her belt and settled into the spot beside Danny, feet outstretched. “In case maybe you wanted some alone time.”

“’Alone time’ isn’t really something I get anymore. I’ve had about a hundred-too-many ghosts crash through my bedroom for that.”

“So why the roof?”

“Roof is more for uh…” Danny twirled his hand, “‘less adoring crowds’ time. ‘Less classmates ogling me’ time. You can stay so long as you don’t ask me to sign anything.”

“I was never interested in the parasocial or capitalistic value of celebrity signatures. Besides, you cross your ‘t’s weird.”

Danny replied with a half-hearted chuckle. His line of sight drifted into the middle-distance again, unfocused.

“Is it getting to be too much?” Sam asked.

“Hmm?” Danny answered, eyes shifting back to her.

Sam gestured broadly, hands and arms outstretched. “You know just. All this. Everything.”

“…Nah.”

Another small silence grew from the cracks in the concrete between them.

“Paulina and Star are looking for you. You know that, right?”

“Oh, are they?”

“Danny. You knew that.”

“Maybe.”

“…And you’re not interested in seeing what they want?”

“I figure Tucker is keeping them busy.”

“You’re unfortunately right.”

“Phantom Phacts?”

“Phantom Phacts.” Sam nodded. “I made him promise to leave out any embarrassing trivia from the trivia section.”

“Thanks for that,” Danny answered. “Is his presentation any good?”

“You think I’ve ever stuck around to hear it?”

“Fair.”

Sam pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapped her arms around her legs and set her chin to her knees, staring forward.

“You’re really not interested in sitting with Star and Paulina for lunch?”

“Not really. Why? Is that bad?”

“No, it’s absolutely great. But I’m…” Sam shrugged, “surprised, I guess. I feel like usually you’d jump at the opportunity. And I kinda don’t think you’re refusing because you’ve suddenly recognized the banality of A-lister status.”

“Maybe that is what happened, you don’t know that. Down with capitalism, Sam.”

“Danny.” Sam tilted a fraction to face him. “I’m worried that this is all too much for you, and you just won’t admit it.”

Danny sat with the silence that followed. “I don’t think it’s too much. I’m just—I dunno. I mean. I’m just not feeling it.”

“…You can admit if it’s overwhelming, Danny. I’ll be the first to shut down ‘Phantom Phacts’ if it is.”

“Nah, nah let Tucker have his fun. He’s not the problem. It’s… I dunno.” Danny pushed himself taller against the chimney, upright now and unslumped. “It’s a little bit overwhelming, I guess, maybe. But it’s kind of what I expected. Maybe even a little easier than I was expecting. I thought I’d be dealing with a lot of Phantom-hate once everyone knew but, I guess that kind of died down a long time before everyone knew.”

“Valerie holding you at gunpoint in the cafeteria wasn’t Phantom-hate?”

“We’ve had a lot of good talks since then, okay?”

Sam let out a quiet laugh. “So then… why aren’t you sitting with the popular kids right now?”

“I just didn’t want to, I guess?”

“And why didn’t you want to?”

“It just didn’t really feel right.”

“Is it because of me?” Sam asked, another side-long glance cast to Danny. “Because you can sit with them. I’ll still make fun of you if you do, but you don’t have to… not sit with them because of me.”

“What? Huh—no. Nah, nah I mean I do care what you think Sam. But I mean if I wanted to be sitting with them then I would so. I mean. You don’t have to worry that it’s you.”

“So then what is it?”

Danny took a moment to answer.

“It’s just… it’s a feeling. I dunno. Like.” Danny spread his arms out. “The invitation is wrong? Or the invitation isn’t actually for me?”

“…The invitation is for Phantom instead?”

Pensive indecision set into Danny’s eyes. “That’s not totally it. Because I mean I AM Phantom. I’m not not me when I’m Phantom. Maybe I trash-talk a little more in ghost form but I’m not… not me. That’s still just me. You know that.”

“Right, yeah, no Danny. It just sounded like that’s what you were saying.” Sam let her legs slide out a few inches. “So what are you saying?”

Danny sat with the question. “When the news first picked up on Phantom, way back when—Inviso-Bill?—that wasn’t really anyone, you know? They made up some spooky icon to make the news about. Which was just like, whatever, not me. I didn’t even take ‘Inviso-Bill’ too personally because that just wasn’t me. And even when I stopped being an enemy and started actually being ‘Danny Phantom’… no one actually got it right, you know? They kind of came up with a character for me. Just some hero. I listen to the news and how they talk about me and I think, even now, I think ‘That isn’t me.’”

Danny pulled his knees in, a mirror to Sam, and stared down into his tattered jean fabric. “And when everyone learned I’m Phantom I guess I kind of expected them to be like ‘Oh it’s Fenton’ and then that fake version of Phantom would go away.” Danny raised his eyes to Sam, far more bothered than before. “…I think the opposite happened. They don’t look at Phantom and think ‘oh it’s Fenton’. They look at Fenton and think ‘oh it’s Phantom.’ I think Danny Fenton got put away. I think the person I was for 14 years doesn’t exist to them anymore. Whoever they invited to lunch isn’t me. He doesn’t exist. But I’m suddenly responsible for him. And it’s not even me.”

Danny paused. “And now I’ve been wondering like… how long until I disappoint them? You know? How long until I do something that makes them angry because I’m not doing the thing they expect ‘Phantom’ to do? How long until they start seeing there’s too much ‘Fenton’ in me and they start to hate me for it all over again? For them to really like me, I don’t think I can be me, and I don’t know how to do that. I don’t know how to be someone who doesn’t just disappoint everyone in the end.”

A long gust of wind swept between them, stealing away the seconds.

“…So now you’re hiding on the roof.”

“It was the easiest solution to my problem.”

“But not a lasting one, if you ever want to get down.” The wind settled, and Sam swept a lock of hair behind her ear. “…Do you care if you disappoint them?”

Danny shrugged. “I. Yeah. I think. I don’t—I don’t think I totally know for certain, but I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

“Well, you’re not going to disappoint me, or Jazz, or Tucker—and if Tucker does act disappointed over any lost Phantom Phacts ventures I’ll whap him over the head. But I mean, we know who you are. We’re not going to be disappointed realizing you’re not ‘Phantom.’ The worst you can do is land right back where you started.”

“And what if I started acting like ‘Phantom’ instead. Would that disappoint you guys?”

“Do you want to act like ‘Phantom’?”

Danny paused. “…No. Not at all.”

“Then don’t. It’s that simple.” Sam stood, and she stretched until her back popped. “It’s not your responsibility to uphold whatever delusions people project onto you. I won’t hesitate to call them out on it. You know I’m good at being direct, and you know I’m even better at making enemies.”

“I don’t wanna be mean to them though when they’re finally being nice.”

“They’re not being nice, they’re projecting. If their niceness to you is conditional on you fitting to the box they created for you, that’s not nice, that’s manipulation, and it’s exactly the root of my ever-frothing disdain for popularity. It’s always some element about popular people that people latch on to, and they can fit the box that people give them, or they can reject it and find themselves wallowing amongst us outcasts. Don’t do that to yourself, Danny. Don’t live in their chains.” Sam tilted her head to Danny. “You spend all day trapping ghosts into tight little boxes and you can’t even recognize when it’s happening to you. I think you’d be better at spotting this.”

“It’s a cylinder, really. The thermos. It’s a cylinder. And don’t say ‘box’ so much. You might summon company.”

“You just said ‘box’ though.”

“I did say ‘box’.”

“Box.”

“Box.”

Sam laughed, noise trailing light on her lips. “…Feeling any better?”

“A little, I think… I still… I still think I... it's not as easy to just say 'I don't care if I disappoint them.' It's still scary. I don’t want to end up proving them right that they were right to hate me all along.”

“Are the opinions of Dash Baxter really the ones to be holding on a pedestal? Is his opinion of you really more important than what you think of yourself? You’ve been through this with the A-listers already. Don’t torture yourself again just because the door is wide open. I promise you Danny, it won’t make you happy.”

“So I should just do whatever makes me happy?”

“Every time.” Sam nodded.

"Even if I'm a total disappointing loser?"

"All the better."

"Even if I blow any chance I have with Paulina out the window?"

“Wouldn't have it any other way. Got any idea what you intend to say to her when she finds you?”

Danny paused. He pushed himself standing. “Maybe I could talk her ear off about NASA until she gets bored of me?”

“Excellent. Can I join? I have a lot to say about SpaceX and private capital encroaching on space exploration.”

“Does that apply to me? I’ve been to space. Am I private capital?”

“You’re not private capital.”

“Then what am I?”

“Annoying.” Sam locked arms with Danny, and dragged him along forward, her combat boots clunking against the rooftop. “And my friend. Come on. I’ll brief you on everything wrong with privately-owned space exploration while we’re rappelling down the side of the building with my sick and cool as hell grappling hook.”

“I can fly.”

“And I have a sick grappling hook. What’s your point.”

“It’s probably called a ‘Fenton Hook.’”

“Is that a Phantom Phact?”

Danny shook his head, and a smile pulled on his lips. “Nah. I think it’s a Fenton Fact.”

[undyingsunshine]

10 Characters I fell in Love With in 2021

Tagged by the amazing @feveredcharm !!!! Thank you very much for the tag! <3 I go into quite the (loving) rant in some of these, so I've put them all under the cut! And also so I don't accidentally shove a long post into all these fandom tags! ^^;

I also could only think of 8 characters for this! Mostly because the characters I really fixated on this year were my own! xD Or they were ones that I already loved before 2021!

Anyway, here we go!

1 - Li Cu - DMBJ (Tomb Of The Sea) Ho, you all know my love for this little fucker. Pure of heart, dumb of ass, barer of misfortune. Outside of tumblr and DMBJ as a whole, I am most often writing in the perspective of angry, jaded and cautious characters; ones who have been given plenty of reasons not to trust anyone. It's quite the comfy niche that I find is the easiest to default to, so when DMBJ held out its hand and presented Li Cu. Well. How could I say no?? He's one of the few characters I've actually written for in the series because I feel quite familiar with his kind of character - and honestly I wouldn't mind writing more (in fact, I am writing more, just very slowly. ) There's so much nothingness to work with, seeing as he only appears once in the series so far, and that nothingness means I can just write fuck tons of angst with no payoff, y'know, like a dick /j /lh. He's angry, he's hurt and he's just. Confused. He's alone, for the most part, barely any family and barely any friends. And at the end of it all, he still has barely any family or any friends, but the friends are a little closer, and his dad is assumedly less violent. Throughout his life, he's reminded constanly that violence is seemingly the only way to get attention and recognition, a deeprooted issue that I feel is only solidified by his time with the Wangs because that's exactly how their system seems to work. Kill or be killed. And because the aftermath isn't looked into, I get to look into it and wiggle my evil evil hands across the keyboard while I write the most harrowing unresolved angst that I can. Because it's fun, to both write and to watch people peel at their yellow wallpaper in agony and despair. :) 2 - Yang Hao - DMBJ (Tomb of The Sea) MY BOY. MY DEAR BOY. HOW I LOVE HIM. He suffers, and yet no one hears him. He's the underling(?) of Huo Daofu??? Like??? WHAT that could be such an interesting thing to dig into? Especially if you consider a sort of mirror between Wu Xie+Li Cu and Huo Daofu+Yang Hao which, YES I bring this up all the time BECAUSE IT'S SO. INTERESTING???? Yang Hao is aggressive. He finds it easy to bully others to make things go the way he wants. He utilises it so well, and I imagine he only gets better at using it as time goes on, be it for his own gain or for the gain of a team. BUT!!!!! He also has a much softer side. A side of him that feels and loves and cares so soso deeply about the people he's close to! He's emotional, and though he tries to hide it, he's not very good at doing so :P He's also a little bit of a coward until situations become dire, in which he tries his best to be resourceful and quick thinking. 3 - Ethan Winters - Resident Evil IT'S HIM!!! THE DAD!!!! I love him. He's so loving and determined and the way he fights through hell to save Mia and Rose (his wife and daughter) is just a quality of him I admire. Yeah, he's on the quippy side and he's a dumbass, but I like smart-mouthed dumbasses! I absolutely adore this man and I love seing all the incredible art that's in his tag!! (while ignoring all the, in my opinion, unnecessary hate towards him HAHA) Just proves that not even vast horrors can keep a loving parent away from their kid! You do NOT fuck with a parent xD 4 - Aiden Pearce - Watch Dogs Honestly, he just kind of reminds me of my dad a little so I see him and it makes me happy. Though he's not always been the best of people, he loves his family and kind of has a soft side to him that I enjoy! Dude will do anything for ones he loves, he deserves nice things 5 - Sal Fisher - Sally Face I love this funky blue haired dude! He went through a lot but he didn't let any of it stop him! Though Sally Face is extremely disturbing, there's something I find charming in the. Like. The nostalgic feeling??? Like the characters just being a group of friends getting up to stuff, even if there's the sinister side to it all? It's cozy for the first couple chapters. Or, at least as cozy as it can get?? Sal, by nature, is calm, caring and understanding. He has a deep sense of justice and

will seemingly sacrifice anything in order to stop those injustices from happening. He gives others a chance, and he's very accepting, even to those who've wronged him (to an extent). He's a sweetheart, and I love him! 6 - Simon - Cry of Fear I just love this guy. He's definitely not the best and he has some problems he needs to work on, which he does in the good ending! He gets the help he needs and I think that's very awesome. He accepts himself, and finds the peace he desperately needed, even if it was by more tragic means. And the fact he starts respecting Sophie as her own person and accepts her having a new friend? We love character growth! 7 - Sasha Nein and Milla Vodello - Psychonauts Though I have known about Psychonauts for a few years now, I only got to play it in 2021! And it's a really cool game, honestly. I got to fall more deeply in love for a lot of the characters, Sasha and Milla in particular! I love them both and wanted to gush about both of them so they tied xD He's funny, and overall is kind of a dick, but I do love him for it. He cares for control, precision and yeah maybe he should be a teeny more considerate for those he puts through his experiments, but he's not a bad guy at all! After all, he's still protective of the kids and he offers to help Raz with his psychic abilities, as well as the strange mess that is his mind, letting him earn his badges despite Milla saying otherwise! Milla is. just. Ohhh, I LOVE HER. I love her so much. She's so sweet and caring, and despite her traumatising experience with the orphanage that took away the children she loved, she still continues to work with them and cares deeply about them and their safety. Her mind being a wholeass party also adds to her charm - she's a lady who loves to have fun! Honestly, she might be my favourite character in the game lowkey?? Anytime she's onscreen she's almost guaranteed to make me smile. Skilled, graceful, loving and so undeniably kickass! XD 8 - Josh Sauchak - Watch Dogs One of my favourite characters from Watch Dogs 2! Though, I do have to admit, MOST of Watch Dogs 2's characters are my faves XD He's always wanting to help others, and fights against injustice, which, by now, you can tell is a character trait I love xD And aside from that, he's also super sweet and super skilled, I wish we got to see more of him! If there's another Watch Dogs game, I'd absolutely love to see him come back!

Okay, that's all I can really think of? There might be other characters, but I couldn't really write a whole lot about them! So this'll do for now, I want this thing outta my drafts!

For this I'll be tagging @tbx12 @jockvillagersonly and @traineecryptid !! Of course, no pressure to do it! And sorry if any of you have already been tagged/already done it ((which if you have, send it to me so I can see 👀)) All the love!!! <3

[opalmaplehibiscus]

Jamil’s Guide to Get the Okay From Your S/O’s Parents HC

HC on how Jamil Dealt w/ Everyone when trying to get Permission to Date Reader

*Continue ver. Of Jamil and His Adventure with Romance HC

·       So, you would think that since the 1st year crew witnessed the confession, you and Jamil would be dating right? Haha, wrong

·       Deuce and Epel would be giving Jamil death glares every time he says hi to you when meeting each other in the hallways, giving light kisses on the cheek or forehead, or even approaching you in general

·       The two would pick a fight with Jamil, making delinquent-like facial expressions and cracking their knuckles going as far as to even growl when Jamil doesn’t stop walking up towards you

·       They felt like dads that were about to give up their kid to some evil maniac, tainting their once innocent child to a “I hate you Dad” delinquent – and they weren’t having that. Excuse you, I raised that kid and you’re about to ruin all my hardwork? F*** you, like hell I’m letting you do that

·       Jamil would get annoyed by it. But, he would hold back his sneer since he knew that you treasure your friends, and he literally just started dating you (although Deuce and Epel would like to say otherwise). Yeah, no, he’s not willing to get dumped when their relationship hasn’t even lasted a day

·       He would let his tongue use its magic, not his unique magic, but its flattering magic in hopes to convince Deuce and Epel to let him at least get a foot closer to you

·       And to the horrors of Dad #1 and #2, they nearly fell for it. Nearly. That is until Ace comes in to save the day

·       Ace would make it seem like he approved of you and Jamil at first. At first

·       Out of all 5 of them though, he was  #2 most overprotective dad 

·       He’s seen your ups and your downs. And he was freaking saved by you not once, but twice. Not only that, but you tolerate his jerky-side and continued to support him nonstop. He cares about you and wants you to be in good hands, not get hurt

·       After witnessing Jamil’s true side and how much of a jerk he was to Kalim, yeah, Jamil was added to Ace’s black list. Now that he’s dating you though? He’s on the hit list now

·       And to emphasize that Jamil would never get his approval, Ace would take you somewhere else whenever Jamil ends up arguing with Deuce and Epel

·       Jamil would notice it right away, and try to get through or at least stop it, but Deuce and Epel, following the plan the 1st year squad created, would continue to block his way, even going as far as to insult how ugly he looked when he was OB. Which was taboo.

·       The duo would then be facing a pissed Jamil, who gets angrier when he sees Ace sticking his tongue or giving a knowing-smirk behind his shoulder as he takes you far, far away from him

·       And every. time. it. happens. Jamil would be tempted to use his unique magic. The only reasons he wouldn’t were because of 1. You, 2. He just got over OBing and wasn’t dumb enough to use it when he wasn’t done recovering, and 3. You

·       If Ace was bad, Jamil had it worse with Sebek

·       Surprisingly, the half-demon/half-human was #1 most overprotective dad

·       When Sebek watched how Jamil betray Kalim, he felt betrayed and angered

·       He thought him and Jamil were similar, with the want of wanting to protect their master while feeling honored to stay by their sides

·       After watching the magicam, he was already ready to take down Jamil. But boy oh boy did he had the guts to date you

·       Sebek: PREPARE TO DIE SNAKE Jamil: WHAT THE ACTUALLY F- Kalim: NO CURSING JAMIL! Well, at least not in front of your s/o Jamil: … F-Duck

·       Sebek wouldn’t hold back and literally tries to kill Jamil while Jamil runs away, screaming profanities left and right. Sebek wouldn’t admit it even in his death, but he holds you close to his heart

·       Jack, being the nicest of the five, would interview Jamil, interrogating him to T. He’s also the one that gives the okay sign to attack Jamil once he sees that the coast is clear

·       When Jamil talks with Jack, it goes more or less smoothly except for some bumps along the way

·       Jack: You better watch your back, if you ever hurt [Y/N]… Jamil: Do you expect me to actually take you seriously? I bet I can beat you even when you’re using your unique magic Jack: Even in front of [Y/N]? Jamil: You’re becoming more like your dorm leader Jack: You do realize that I’m the easiest one to get permission right? Jamil: Did I ever mention that your unique magic makes you look majestic. Honestly, I admire it

·       In the end Jamil does get Jack’s permission to date you. And thanks to that, he was able to get Deuce and Epel’s permission more or less. If you take out the threats and insults and him nearly getting caught by you when he was about to roast them

·       Just when he finally, and miraculously, finished getting all the first years’ permission, someone taps him on the shoulder. When he turns around and sees the rest of the dorms, his face turns pale

·       Are you kidding him? Why the actual crap are they involved? Just let him date you for gosh sake!

·       Out of all the dorms he had the easiest time to get approval, it was Heartslabyul

·       Riddle was similar to Jack, where he interrogated Jamil, probing around to see what were his true intentions of dating you

·       After the whole, intense event, Jamil was able to prove that he wanted to date you out of love and adoration he held for you. To be completely fair, he had no choice but to give honest answers since Riddle had used his unique magic on him, while Cater was filming him with his phone and Trey, who he thought would be the softest one of the three, was giving him a glare that could potentially put the devil to shame

·       The talk with Octavinelle was just a shaming session. They would continue saying “shame on you for so and so” or “you really think you could date [Y/N], when you’re only going to do this and this”, listing everything he had done in chapter 4. When they mentioned you not liking guys that would scream “DOKAN! NICE SHOT!”, he wanted to just dig a hole

·       Pomefiore though made Octavinelle seem like a baby. Until then, Jamil thought he had the sharpest tongue in the school. But that obviously wasn’t the case

·       He found it strange that Vil had politely asked him to stop by his dorm so they could talk, and thought that if he used his flattery again, he’ll at least easily get approval

·       The blows Jamil faced was too much though. Vil and Rook, when they want to roast someone – they don’t hold back

·       Jamil’s pride was completely trampled to the point he wasn’t able to get up. From judging his taste in fashion to criticizing how he looked when he Obed - and what do you mean he looked like Juju?! He looks nothing like that dumb snake! His looks, at the least, is decent compared to the rest of the school! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE’S JUJU?!?!?!?

·       Vil: Honestly you just remind me of that one snake that always sticks its tongue out on the side of its tongue from that one voodoo movie Jamil: What? I’m not that dumb snake! Vil: You’re right. That’s just an insult to the poor thing. You look like Jafar

·       We don’t talk about Savanaclaw. Don’t mention it to him, don’t try to ask about it to him, don’t bring it up to him

·       Jamil: Why the hell do I need to get approval from you? Leona: Is that how you’re going to talk to their parents when you ask for their permission to date [Y/N]? Jamil: At least they’ll like me unless a pathetic cat who’s only liked by a kid Leona: … “I am hunger. I am thirst. I am which steals your tomorrow –”

·       Honestly, Jamil didn’t know why you didn’t mention that you were friends with Malleus Draconia? That guy isn’t your “cute, kind and shy Tsunataro”!!!! He’s THE Malleus Draconia!!!!!

·       Jamil has felt fear before. He’s familiar with it. He felt it when Kalim was about to die from poisoning, when Kalim fell his magic carpet, when he found an assassin disguised as a servant, waiting to kill Kalim in his sleep. But the fear he had for the Diasomnia dorm tops all that.

·       He never would’ve thought that out Silver, Malleus, and Lilia, he would be most scared of Lilia

·       What baby face? What about him talking like a grandpa? All Jamil sees is Satan in a body of a dark fae 

·       When he was able to finally leave their dorm, he nearly fainted from the sheer pressure they emitted. They do not hold back on their blood lust. Whoever gets on their bad side, his condolences. You aren’t going to survive

·       When you greet him from the dorm’s entrance, he demands you to spoil him for a week while resting his head on your shoulder and hugging you tightly

·       When you hug him back just as tight, and patted his head while saying he did good, it reminds him why he still did it and that everything was worth it. Your mere presence was enough for him, yet when you comfort him? It was the best thing ever

·       After resting and spending a whole day with you (it ended up becoming more of a therapy session for his newly formed PTSD from Diasomnia), he prepares himself to face the final boss: Kalim

·       Despite Kalim already telling him that he supported their relationship, Jamil knew better than to just leave things at that

·       Jamil was aware how precious you were to Kalim especially when he heard Kalim saying you were his bffl right after Jamil

·       When he heard how you helped Kalim become more honest with his feelings and spent time hanging out with him when he was lonely, the feeling of guilt crashed into Jamil

·       It was times like this that he’s reminded how much of a jerk he was towards Kalim and that he should do a better job giving Kalim the respect he deserves

·       So, when he approached Kalim and asked Kalim’s approval, the conversation between Kalim and Jamil ended up being another heart-to-heart conversation with Jamil wanting to actually gain approval as someone Kalim would honestly support, not because he was his best friend

·       In the beginning, their talk resembled that of a person consulting a relationship counselor when Jamil was talking about his honest opinion of him dating you, his feelings for you and how he honestly felt nervous around you. Despite his calm and chill demeanor, Jamil talked about how he was scared of hurting you. Even if it wasn’t his intention, he was scared that he might screw up

·       Kalim, being someone who knew him the best, would point out everything good about Jamil, and Jamil would forever hold it a secret in his heart, but when Kalim mention how Jamil was someone he would trust despite everything that happened

·       The conversation shifts  towards them telling each other how much the other changed and developed after the whole Chapter 4 incident

·       When Kalim brought up how he learned to be more observant and considerate towards him, Jamil felt his heart beat faster from the nervousness and guilt. Jamil wanted to tell him that Kalim did more than enough, that he was, other than you, the only person in the world who would ever give him honest praises. That Kalim would forever be his irreplaceable friend

·       Yet, Jamil could only hold back seeing how this was going to a rare moment that Kalim actually opens up and spills everything that was piling inside of him. And if he interrupted, he knew that Kalim would end up stop talking about it, and how was he going to know that Kalim is actually okay with him dating you when it hasn’t even been a few days since the two of them went back becoming buddies?

·       When Kalim starts talking about how closely he holds Jamil and you to his heart, and that he wants to see the two of you becoming happy, Jamil would deny the fact that he was tearing up. Nope you’re just seeing things, Kalim, I’m not about to cry. I said I’m fine, Kalim no seriously I’m okay Kalim-

·       When he sees you coming out of your hiding spot from Kalim’s room, he surprised

·       You confess to Jamil that you came to also gain Kalim’s approval just a few hours before he had arrived, but stayed back out of your concern for him

·       When you noticed how Jamil started to look offended and thought you were suspicious of him using his unique magic on Kalim like he did before, you clarified and mentioned how Jamil looked nervous, heck more nervous then the time he had to talk to Diasomnia which led you to stay back and morally support him

·       Jamil would try to hide his blush, embarrassed and touched that you stayed back for him

·       He pulls up his hood, press it down firmly on to his head, pulls the strings until his face wasn’t visible, and he lied there in ball position

·       It took you and Kalim a good hour to coax Jamil to get him off the ground, and another hour to get him to take off his hood

[halfgclden]

can i uhhhhhhh get choebe for theeee first meme :3c

XITERSON

Who is more aggressive in bed? - aggressive?? in bed????

Lights on or off? - doesn’t matter, maybe off? pheebs is bright enough for them to see if they need to anyway

Who does what chores? - omg why would they have a chore wheel because if they do the same things too often they get sick of them and it makes it harder

Who gets babied when they’re sick? - if u think the answer is not both of them u are DEAD WRONG they each get fuzzy socks, breakfast in bed, soup, So Many blankets, different juices and teas and loving words and smh

Who makes breakfast? - it’s Illegal for chase to cook alone but he’s happy to help! hand pheebs some spices, stir some pots, lick some spoons, oh my god he’d do the thing where he stands behind them and wraps his arms around their waist and rests his head on top of theirs and i’m Sick

Where would they go on their honeymoon? - my brain keeps going arcade arcade arcade so what if,,,

What are their quirks while sleeping? - they Absolutely tangle together so it’s impossible to get up without physically detaching the other from themself

What is their favorite activity as a family? - game night! and building blanket forts c”:

Who is the stricter parent? - okay i was gonna say god their kids would get away with so much but they’re the parents that will be like hey? hey buddy? i know you’re feeling very overwhelmed right now but you can’t throw things alright? got it? cool

Who would be the big spoon? - phoebe jetpacks but also sometimes chase rolls over and is like hi i want to hold u

Who would wake up first? - phoebe! chase can get up early but he’s a sleeby guy

Do they have nicknames for each other? - if chase likes you you get a nickname that’s the rule

What happened when they met each other’s parents? - both their families love the other! but also the neo heliades were that scene from parks and rec where they’re like “never hurt her” and chase was like “haha yeah of course not” and they were like “but never hurt her” and he was like “i- i won’t!”

How do they apologize after an argument? - honestly probably just by saying sorry no ceremony about it

What would they be like as parents? - oh see above but Also daytrips?? chase with one of those front baby carriers? so embarrassing at every recital/game/event? but also chase the stay at home dad and breadwinner emissary xi

Who is the better cook? - chase cooks like a sim

Who is more romantic? - i’ve never been able to show it but chase can be romantic he just wants to think of ways to make phoebe happy with little surprises and date nights but tell me he wouldn’t come home with flowers when phoebe has chocolates waiting for him i Can’t

What sort of gifts do they get for each other? - oh definitely mostly the homemade kind, they both love crafting. the hardest part would not be telling the other person Right Away about it slash not crafting together ahhshdk

Who gets jealous easiest? - damn neither? one’s like “that person is so Attractive” and the other is like “i kNOW RIGHT???”

Who gets more excited for events? (e.g. birthdays, christmas…etc) - oh they both are HYPE for holidays. u think the morph house and the heliade house aren’t DECKED OUT for halloween rn??? u think pheebs’s first christmas/yule/saturnalia is going to pass without grand ceremony ??? u are wrong

Who is the most adventurous? - god both, maybe phoebe is more adventurous and chase is more impulsive?

Who is the most protective? - chase? protective of the people he loves? never heard of that one

What would they have been like as childhood sweethearts? - okay but literally if it was an au they’d be those kids that met at camp and continued to be penpals and i’m just describing them nvm

Song to sum them up? - here’s a playlist 😌 but also The Snack That Smiles Back - Shawn Wasabi

[purplesurveys]

1169

Do you take lessons for anything? No. I’ve done so in the past, but not at the moment.

Has something really heavy ever fallen on you?  Other than siblings or cousins from when we played together as kids, I don’t think so.

If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear?  I never wear makeup but whenever my friends have used my face as a practice stage (lol) they’ve usually just used natural or nude-ish colors, which I find look okay on me.

Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall? It has a sliding door. I’m not sure what material it’s made out of, but I can tell you it’s at least not glass.

If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other?  Cooper does tend to bark and/or whine when he sees me giving more attention to Kimi, but not always. Kimi couldn’t give less of a crap, but this is also because he is 13.

Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in? I used to not like being inside my bedroom, especially after the breakup. For a long time it was a place I only associated with crying and breakdowns, so when I was doing the arduous task of starting over I haaaaated staying there because it only hurled me right back to square one. But I’m happy to say that I eventually got better, had enough strength to change the narrative for my room, and now I like being here again :)

Do you remember the last question you were asked? What did you answer? My mom just asked me to watch Cooper because he was having the zoomies.

Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn?  Not a big fan of popcorn but if I had to pick a topping, I’d go with cheddar cheese.

Are you lonely?  I’ll feel it sometimes, but it only lasts for a moment or so.

What’s your favorite magazine to read?  Wow I haven’t read a magazine in years.

Do you like pineapple?  I hate it. In all forms. The pizza debate doesn’t even matter to me lmao, I just think pineapple downright sucks.

Have you ever seen fireflies? They used to be common in our village when we first moved in, back when there were only like 3 houses in the neighborhood (we were one of the first to move in here). As more houses were built and the place got more occupied the fireflies gradually lessened until they disappeared altogether.

Have you ever trespassed?  I very vividly remember taking multiple trips to the school cemetery back in grade school (I went to Catholic school and ours had a cemetery below our chapel, where all our deceased nuns were housed...I really shouldn’t be talking about this at 10 PM...). I am 100% sure that was an off-limits area but we went there anyway because we were a naughty group of kids and because no one was guarding the area.

Do you tell your parents where you are going? Yeah; if I live with them, they have the right to know. < Ooh, I’ve never even thought about it this way before but this is a very good point. I’ll second this, haha.

Do you agree with the notion that all people were created equal? Yes.

Do you raise your hand or participate in class? God never. I hid as much as I can and only recited if I was called on purpose.

Do you like visiting the mall? Why or why not?  I like the malls that we have. But then again, malls are the only decent public spaces we have - we don’t have public libraries, parks, playgrounds, etc. – so it’s not like I have a choice on where I can go if I want to go out. 

Have you ever purposely hurt an animal?  Yeah I kill bugs when I see them. Soz, I have no feelings for them whatsoever.

Would you ever see a therapist?  I planned to finally do this last year but it just fell through haha and eventually I was able to care for myself too. Now that I’m doing a lot better for the most part, I feel like I’d have no clue what to talk about once faced with one.

Are you afraid of heights?  Only if I had to jump all the way down. But if I ever found myself staying at an extreme height simply to enjoy the view, or if I was ever in one of those towers where the top floor’s floor is made out of glass, I think I would enjoy that.

Are you afraid of the dark?  I always say I’m usually not afraid of the dark, and will only be if I was in a situation that was intended to scare me. I would definitely be afraid of the dark if I was in like an abandoned cave or a haunted house, but I would also find the darkness in my room comforting.

Are you a jealous person?  When I am it’s mostly been in a playful sense and rarely serious.

When is your birthday? April 21st.

What are you listening to right now? My very very old aircon doing its very very loud whirring thing. It’s become a running joke in the family because it is literally SO FUCKING LOUD hahahaha Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing?  As a goody-goody, I can only ever do this to my mom; but yeah, she’s caught me many times.

Are you still friends with someone from kindergarten?  Sure, but I’m not ~close friends with any of them. Just chummy enough to like their photos on social media once in a while or greet them happy birthday. My oldest friend was from Grade 1.

What is the most important thing to you?  Being happy with myself and making sure I don’t miss out on life and opportunities.

Do you like whipped cream?  I can take it or leave it.

Are you close to your mother?  We get along but not close.

Are you close to your father? I’m closer to him in the sense that I would be more comfortable around him, but we’re also not physically or emotionally close. 

Do you walk around bare foot when you're at home? Or do you wear socks?  I am Asian hahaha what do you think?

Do you like chocolate popsicles?  Sure! One would sound lovely right now, actually.

Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume?  Both of the schools I’ve attended don’t have mascots.

Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben?  Great Wall for sure. Sorry but I can’t see myself getting excited over a giant clock, and I’m sure there are other lovely spots in London I’d much rather visit. 

Have you ever written a poem?  Always unsuccessfully. It’s never been my forte.

Would you ever be a tornado chaser?  That’s a thing? Uh...no way??

What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff?  Pizza. And anything, I guess. Barbecue sauce is the bomb.

Your parents tell you that this summer, you get to pick the vacation. Where do you plan to go?  Covid notwithstanding and budget permitting, probably New York City.

What do you think is a good theme for a prom?  I could not care less.

Have you ever had to do a class in summer school? Thankfully, never.

Do you get nervous when you go to the doctor? About what?  You know, I’ve always thought going to the doctor was no sweat until I realized just how nervous I was when I had to book a telemedicine consultation once as part of my job (PR can make you do the most random, out of context things sometimes, I swear haha). I surprised even myself with the reaction I had when I found out I had to do it, and how I felt like declining the offer...I guess I was scared about the possibility of underlying health issues suddenly being unearthed. Your whole life can always get turned upside down in the blink of an eye with just one diagnosis.

Have you ever been to the rainforest?  I’m pretty sure the climate I live in is called tropical rainforest, so I guess yeah.

Have you ever created a website?  Not from scratch. I had always made it under an umbrella website, like Blogspot.

Ever thought about writing a book?  Sure, as a kid.

Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone?  No. Whenever I have dreams of that nature it’s always me or a loved one being killed, but never me doing the killing.

Do you ever make up stories in your head and wish they come true? Yes.

Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose?  Stuffy. It sucks not being able to breathe freely.

Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat?  I super hate sore throat. I already get stomachaches frequently, so even though I know how sucky it can be I feel like the discomfort would be bigger with a sore throat.

Do you think your last relationship was a disaster?  The way it ended was, but it wouldn’t be fair to myself to invalidate the genuine happiness I felt when I was in it.

Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube?  Never.

Who do you think is the easiest to talk to?  Angela.

Would you consider yourself to be emo?  No.

Do you have a favourite metal band or do you not like metal?  Not really, no.

What is your current desktop picture?  It’s just one of the provided desktop photos on my Mac.

Thick or thin blanket?  Thick.

Who are your favorite bands?  Paramore, Coldplay, and Against Me!

How do you mark through your word search puzzles?  Depends on my mood. Sometimes I’ll strike through and sometimes I’ll go ahead and encircle the entire word altogether.

Have you ever sewn something?  I’ve done embroidery...does that count?

What did you eat for dinner last night?  We had breakfast for dinner, actually hahaha so my dad made an omelette, hotdogs, and tapa.

Ever been grounded? If so, for what?  Continued from last night. Yes, I was caught cursing all over Twitter when I was like 11 so my parents cut off my access to all my gadgets for a year or so. Which, in retrospect, is an acceptable consequence for my actions, but we’re also talking about a time when schools were starting to view the internet as a necessity in doing homework and research. I missed out on nearly all my homework for a while, and my mom didn’t buy it when I kept telling her I needed to do my research over the internet. At the same time, she kept demanding why my grades weren’t doing so well when she was the reason they kept being pulled down...so yep, not a very fun time.

Have you seen all of the Jaws movies?  No and I don’t really have the desire to. Doesn’t seem like my kind of movie.

When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer)  Maybe 2 or 3 years ago.

Have you ever drank Cherry Coke? No, I don’t drink any soda.

Have you ever had a black eye?  Nope.

Have you ever eaten a bug?  Not to my recollection, but I would love to try cooked crickets and whatever bug can be prepared and eaten.

Do you like pranking people?  Never; the idea makes me cringe since I never know when it’s considered going too far. I’d rather watch people prank other people.

Did you ever take a cooking class in school?  Yeah, but we were required to take it. We also had some baking sessions, which to me was a lot more fun. I remember having to make macarons and rainbow cake which are both right up my alley, heehee.

Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?  No, idk what that is. I just know people turn everything green on that day lol.

Do you use Skype?  I’ve never used Skype on my own. That’s where I used to talk to my dad for video calls maybe around a decade ago, whenever he was abroad; but I never had my own account. These days I alternate among Microsoft Teams, Google  Meet, or Zoom.

Have you ever participated in local magazine cover girl searches?  I don’t think so, but I did join a few contests on some of those kid’s magazines we used to have...none of which I won.

Have you ever been called a skank/slut because of the way you dress?  No.

Is your ex sexually attractive to you still?  I haven’t seen her in 5 months, which helps...that said, I simply feel nothing. I’m neither sexually attracted nor not sexually attracted to her.

Describe the most romantic moment you’ve ever had.  I can think of one but I don’t see the point in still raising it, considering where I am in life right now.

Have you ever cheated on a test?  Yes, once. I hated it.

Have you ever been to couple’s counseling? Nope.

How often does your employer ask you to work overtime?  A few times a week. Sometimes I’ll do it willingly as well just to get the task over with or to save myself some deliverables the next morning. I’m fine with OT-ing tbh; since I work from home, I feel like my time is a lot more flexible.

Did you often read for fun when you were a kid? I read A LOOOOOT as a kid. I was a total bookworm. < Yeah, same. You could always find me bringing a book to school and reading during breaks, even though they technically didn’t allow us to bring any non-academic book. My spark for reading died when I was around 12, same time as when my depression started to kick in, and it never really came back.

When was the last time you were scared?  Someone from the media called me up yesterday VIA LANDLINE to ask a question about a press release I had sent out that day. I usually read up on the materials we have, but I honestly didn’t give a shit about that particular story and didn’t really make an effort to know more about it, so I found myself stumped when he dropped the question. I ended up stalling for a bit before I was able to stutter an answer, so that was scary, but at least he was nice. Also, I hate phone calls.

What’s your favorite song by Rihanna?  KISS IT KISS IT BETTER

Can you speak binary?  No, I never understood it.

Would you rather live somewhere that had hurricanes or tornadoes?  I already do, at least for hurricanes. I imagine I’d be terrified of tornadoes.

Have you ever had a pet that you disliked?  Nooooooo, never. I was never close to Arlee but I still did my best for her to like me, and always fed her whenever my sister would be in her dorm.

When was the last time you saw hail?  Never. Doesn’t happen all that often here, and when it does it’s always in the provinces.

What is on your mind right this second:  I want to spend my remaining time awake reading fanfic (I’m into them again, omg) but I also wanna finish surveys...so I’m doing my best to breeze through this so I can finally look for something to read hahahahaha.

Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)?  Cooper is Cooperino to me. Sometimes I’ll call him Cooperino Cappuccino. Kimi is Kimchi, Kimmerl, Kimberly, The Kimster, and sometimes Lolo, which is grandpa in Filipino heheh.

When was the last time you shaved your legs?  Like 3 or 4 days ago.

Do you ever try free samples at the store?  Nope.

Do you like boys with long hair?  Physical traits don’t matter much to me.

Do you like rootbeer?  I’ve never tried it but I don’t really want to either haha. It smells weird.

What is the best fast food place, in your opinion?  KFC or Taco Bell. Or Jollibee.

Do you have faith in yourself?  Starting to.

[potatowitch]

finding out that the star wars sequel series was written on the fly rather than actually planned out makes so much fucking sense but also pisses me off EVEN MORE because i watched the force awakens in 2016 and within a day of leaving the cinema had a fully fleshed out idea in my head of the direction the next two films would take and the plot points they would cover, all brainstormed in the shower. 16 year old me was more capable of writing a cohesive storyline than disney was. so here you are - i rewrote the sequels to be ten times better than what disney actually gave us. enjoy.

- after rey finds luke they train for a bit then he's like "gotta tell u something. u ever heard of mara jade? she's ur mum" "wait weren't u two dating for a bit" "yeah" "does that mean ur...." "...yeah"

- "why did u leave me on jakku?" "i didnt. she did. i only just learned u existed i wouldve come for u" "oh."

- "...can i call u dad or" "i would be honored if u did"

- meanwhile at the resistance base leia realises finn is force sensitive, gives him her old lightsaber she had in the comics

- because come on. rewatch the force awakens and tell me that man aint fuckin feeling the "shitloads of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced" when starkiller goes off

- and he picks up a lightsaber and instinctively knows how to use it?

- also: two main heroes in a star wars film being a queer coded woman and a queer coded black man.

- and the whole "used to be a stormtrooper and defected, becomes a jedi" is a TOTALLY NEW storyline? not some tired old "white boy villain is a dick for three movies then suddenly turns Good TM right at the end" trope

- make rey explicitly asexual. she's beautiful and smart and got abs that make everyone who sees them MELT but she is NOT INTERESTED in anything but JUSTICE and PLATONIC HUGS

- finn and poe are also making out because come on, disney, if u wanted to show you're becoming more progressive having a loving interracial gay romance is the fucking easiest way to do it. BB8 has two dads and they share The Jacket

- turns out finn is a kenobi because u cannot tell me obi wan didnt Fuck. jedi code says "dont form attachments" but watch the clone wars - obi wan plays fast and loose w the jedi code at the best of times. now we got a skywalker and a kenobi working together being best buds again, THE WAY IT SHOULD BE.

- the destruction of starkiller has crippled the first order. don't fucking look at me like "the resistance just won a major, VERY VISIBLE victory but OOO no somehow they're still very low on numbers and infrastructure" NO. the public destruction of starkiller has earned the resistance an influx of allies. the republic has started publicly supporting them. the first order spent years building that thing and now not only is all that time, effort and MONEY gone, they lost a shitload of staff and military personnel when it blew up

- "the first order is rich" is a plot point I DO NOT UNDERSTAND because it directly contradicts what's going on in the expanded universe books. the first order was built from remnants of the empire that had been banished to the outer reaches of the galaxy to live out of broken down, shitty old star destroyers.

- it's the reason hux, who was raised in a decrepit old academy in the ass end of the universe by an abusive father, is SO anti republic. in his head, it's the reason he starved as a child. it's the reason his mother is dead. it's the reason he had to be raised by a father that beat him. his hatred for the republic is PERSONAL

- disney learn how to write a good villain challenge? hux EASILY could have been terrifying AND sympathetic

- hux and kylo now have to deal with how absolutely PISSED snoke is that both of them failed with starkiller. hux gets force choked and threatened. kylo gets snoke very painfully rooting around in his head. it is emphasised that snoke's relationship with these two is downright abusive.

- somewhere in there, they realise that the whole five years they've known each other snoke has been deliberately pitting them against each other and sneakily forcing them to undermine each other's authority

- they realise it was snoke's shitty leadership that lead to the destruction of starkiller. they realise that maybe they'd be better off on their own

- the two of them plot to murder snoke themselves. while this is happening, the resistance is happily building an army, gathering resources, and forming alliances. luke and rey have reunited with the resistance and now rey and finn are both happily training with luke.

- snoke dies. hux decides to take the mantle of emperor. kylo LETS HIM because he realises he doesn't know shit about fuck when it comes to leading anything more than his knights. has a crisis of confidence about how useful he actually is, then hux decides he wants to keep the knights of ren around as his personal "fuck up the resistance" squad.

- the two of them working together turn out to be fucking terrifying, competent villains. the films have short, five to ten minute sections where they explore their VERY SIMILAR traumas to make them sympathetic WITHOUT making them seem like "uwu they're not actually bad people" because THEY'RE STILL AWFUL GENOCIDAL MASS MURDERERS

- on the kylo trauma side: it's made obvious in the books that from about age 6 snoke has been in his head deliberately grooming him away from his family. make that obvious in the films. make its impact on kylo obvious in how unsure of himself he actually is. don't make his "redemption arc" one where he suddenly goes light side. give him a bastardisation arc where he realises his whole life he has never made a choice - and then make THE FIRST ORDER his choice. (it is the wrong choice! emphasise that! but make him MAKE THAT CHOICE)

- the resistance thinks they're doing well. they have two new jedi. they've seen very little of the first order outside of small operations that they've been squashing. they think "hm. starkiller's loss must have crippled them. we're doing well!"

- until they learn actually. they've got an emperor now. and the commander of the knights of ren is INCREDIBLY loyal to him. the first order is PISSED OFF and VENGEFUL. they're back with a force. they've started invading and subjugating planets even with their forces cut as thin as they are because hux is a military mastermind and kylo and the knights of ren are a fucking TERRIFYING unit in combat.

- also why did disney decide to present hux in the films as a weak pissbaby when he probably topped his class in all combat situations and fights dirty in close quarters. man can SNIPE. man will bite your fucking finger off if you manage to disarm him. he is a 6 foot beanpole and he will kick your ass

- kylo has a crisis about actually having to kill his mother, uncle and cousin. he still feels a bit bad about han - despite everything, he still loves them and is struggling. he actually confides in his knights about this. we get to see that the knights of ren have a found family dynamic with their commander and they comfort him.

- kylo realises it will be painful to murder the last of his bio family but it must be done, because he's come around to hux's view that the resistance and the republic are standing in the way of true peace in the galaxy. he actually believes that reinstating an empire is the best thing for the galaxy. this makes him a more effective villain because he actually believes what he's doing is right.

- more stormtroopers defect to the resistance. finn is there to welcome them and help them adjust. there's a couple of lowkey force sensitive troopers in there too. we learn more about how horrible, soul crushing and traumatic stormtrooper training is. this is a good way to keep painting the first order as an organisation that violates human rights and the geneva convention at every turn.

- the first order makes up for this loss of troops in picking up recruits from the planets they've taken over in the outer rim because they've been providing stability. again - it is SO EASY to write the first order as sympathetic villains WHO ARE STILL FASCIST ASSHOLES. this would've been such a good opportunity to show the moral argument between stability vs freedom. show the flaws in the republic because they do exist!! we see that throughout the ENTIRE expanded universe! every iteration of the republic fails in some way!

- the fight against the first order becomes increasingly more difficult, but they're actually on pretty even ground. it doesn't make sense to me that disney decided to go for the route of "the resistance should've been squished easily by the might of the first order but uwu kylo can't make up his mind and thats what saves them!" that is not a compelling storyline! they are relatively evenly matched and the resistance only JUST comes out on top!

- kylo kills luke in actual combat, not just "luke randomly dissolves for ... no good reason?". this hits the resistance HARD. rey and finn have to struggle with their desire for revenge. leia realises her son is beyond help. it nearly breaks her. she has a moment where she feels like she has lost everything. poe has to step in to remind her she still has him. it is revealed that he joined the resistance after the first order killed his family HORRIBLY when he was a teenager and he and leia sort of have a mother/son relationship.

- this is also a good way to juxtapose hux and kylo. they took their trauma and it made them awful. poe takes his trauma and it makes him kind. it makes him want to protect people from what he went through. also gets rid of the "haha we made the latino man have a drug dealer background" bullshit that disney did

- poe also has to comfort his boyfriend and best friend and remind them that they are fighting to make the galaxy a better place, NOT for revenge. then they have a discussion about "yeah, don't make revenge your main priority, but the jedi were a bit wrong in saying that you shouldn't enjoy it anyway. it's going to feel good to fucking murder kylo and that's okay". acknowledgement that the old jedi code was garbage and too restrictive for actual PEOPLE to follow it.

- kylo still can't kill leia or chewie. we get flashbacks of her singing to him, braiding his hair, comforting him after nightmares. we see baby ben riding on chewie's shoulders. seeing the conflict between kylo recognising his family loved him and still choosing to be a villain would have RUINED ME. he tells hux this, expecting hux to shoot him for it. hux understands - he had a mother, once. the republic killed her.

- (they actually didn't. she was an imperial slave and was probably left behind when an imperial settlement was being razed. the only reason hux actually survived was because he was his father's only heir. there's a whole spiel in the books about brendol going "this kid is a piece of shit bastard i dont want him" and imperial officials being like "the empire needs kids. go pick him up")

- hux decides to kill leia instead. he nearly dies doing so because woman is STILL a force to be reckoned with even at this age. remember she is actually trained to use a lightsaber AND guns. the only reason hux doesn't die? kylo steps in at the last minute and kills his own mother. he's made his choice. he mourns, and then he steels. there is nothing left to pull him to the light side anymore.

- anakin has given up trying to bring his grandson to the light from beyond the grave. him and obi wan are focusing their force ghost attention on rey and finn. now luke and leia are both there too. we get the same "all my jedi ancestors are rooting for me" moment that disney gave us, except now it's shared between rey and finn.

- the two of them plus chewie cut through the knights of ren until they get to kylo. he kicks the living shit out of them, but they manage to kill him. rey earns some gnarly, sexy scars. chewie needs a hug and goddamn does he get one.

- poe is the one to kill hux. he's not just doing it for the galaxy, he's doing it for leia. the first order already stole his first family from him. he won't lose his second family to them. bonus points if BB8 joins the fight and like ... tases hux in the leg a few times.

- we get some gratuitous "c3p0 and r2 are sneaking through an imperial base and fucking shit up but like, badly because 3p0 never stops talking" scenes

- you want to bring rose tico into it? she's head of the resistance's infiltration team. she's with the droids taking down shields, stabbing people in the back, freeing prisoners, stealing plans, sowing chaos. she's the one who finally takes down phasma.

- without their emperor and the knights of ren, the new empire crumbles pretty quickly. the resistance has taken HEAVY losses but they have won. we get a very beautiful funeral scene for luke and leia. there's a gorgeous group hug between finn, rey, poe, chewie and bb8. poe and finn smooch against the sunset.

- we see finn and rey going into crystal caves to get kyber crystals. poe, chewie, bb8, r2 and 3P0 wait outside the cave in the falcon for them to be done picking up their crystals, then we see finn and rey inside the falcon building their new lightsabers with guidance from a bunch of force ghosts. we get to see that rey has chosen to decorate the inside of the falcon with a bunch of potted plants so she can be surrounded by greenery at all time. the found family aesthetic is STRONG

- rey builds a saber pike. it comes out golden. finn builds a standard single blade saber that comes out white, like ahsoka's. gold to emphasise protection of the weak and the perfect blend of combat and scholarly pursuits. white to emphasise free will from both the jedi and the sith. it is emphasised that these two will NOT be your traditional jedi.

- we see an epilogue where poe is working to help shift the republic's focus from political squabbling to actually protecting its citizens. he leads reconstruction efforts, helps establish more of a presence in the outer rim, constantly fights for moving resources from protecting the republic's assests to providing food, shelter and safety to its citizens.

- finn is constantly by his side. we see him protecting his new husband, on the front lines destroying remnants of the empire and the first order, and using his combat prowess to absolutely murder slave owners.

- rey has taken to training new force sensitives with chewie by her side, however she recognises the jedi code has been failing force sensistives for millennia, and instead her teachings are more aligned with the grey jedi philosophy. she recognises that people feel anger, hate, grief - and that they are all valid emotions. it's what you choose to do with them that is important.

- she actively encourages personal connection, believing that loving your friends and family is righteous and the true path to the light side. her apprentices all adore her, and she is always there for them - she'll listen to their worries, from something as small as "i am 13 years old and my first crush just rejected me" to "i am a former slave coming to you after the first order murdered my family and tortured me. i am having nightmares and am afraid of the anger i feel".

- she encourages apprentices to stay in contact with their family, and she becomes that family for the ones who have lost theirs.

- you get the feeling that this time, peace in the galaxy is actually going to last. anakin, obi wan, luke and leia look on from the Force in pride at their children and grandchildren. they did good. they can finally rest.

- the sequels have made personal choice a major theme. finn chooses to defect. poe and rey choose to be kind, when they have every reason not to be. hux and kylo make the wrong choices. there's no flip flopping like a dead fish between good and evil until the very last second. the lines between kindness and freedom and hatred and subjugation are clearly drawn again and again.

- i sit in the cinema after the screen goes black and i weep. i am satisfied. this was a fitting end for a franchise i have loved for most of my life.

[infinitestarsintheskye]

The Lady and the Chauffeur Name Thing

So at the end of my LAST installment of my FS Downton Abbey AU, Christmas at the Abbey, I promised that if ONE person wanted an explanation of the many new names that popped up I would write it. Well many weeks ago now the lovely @valentinaonthemoon asked for such a list, and I am a woman of my word, even if I completely forgot about and only remembered about it just now. I’m going to pop it under a read more bc it is going to get LONG  and also contain ALL OF THE SPOILERS for that series. 

OKAY SO

We’ll do this in birth order I think. Nicknames are in () 

Eilidh May FitzSimmons, born December 12th 1919 - The first of the many babies!! As many of you will know if you have been following me for a while, Eilidh May was, pre-finale of course, my utter ride or die name for baby girl Fitzsimmons. I think I have like three or four fics with this particular name in it, I loved it so much. Eilidh is the Scottish variation of Helen, and means sun-ray, which ugh wouldn’t that just be so perfect for a little FitzSimmons baby. I was just utterly in love with the idea of FS giving their baby a Scottish name (as you will see in the NEXT FS baby) and the fact that this had a space/star/sun/celestial twist to it just absolutely SOLD IT for me. I should add, for all my non-scottish followers that Eilidh is pronounced Ay-Lee. I have no idea how gaelic pronunciation works, I just know how to say it.  Her middle name, May, doesn’t need much explanation. I just loved the idea of them giving their little girl a middle name after someone on the team. 

George (Georgie) Lincoln Campbell, born 2nd October 1921 - Okay ngl, I got real lazy with this name. Mary and Matthew’s (who Daisy and Lincoln were in the place of in this fic) son was also named George, and I liked it, I thought it would be cute if he was called Georgie, as a bit of a variation. His middle name comes from his father, obvi, who, in keeping with BOTH canons (the noise I made when I figured out I could do that I swear. I’m so sorry Lincoln it was just far too good an opportunity to pass up), I killed off on the day he was born. My apologies. 

Hamish Phillip FitzSimmons, born 6th January 1922 - Oh this name. A lot of people REALLY don’t like this name, which is fine. As I said with Eilidh, I was really on a kick of giving FS babies Scottish names. I originally dismissed Hamish, and it just wouldn’t leave me alone, and just utterly grew on me. I actually went to school with a Hamish, he was a fair few years below me and he was just the tiniest, most adorable little toot! From what I can gather, Hamish is an anglicised version of Seamus or Seumus, which is the gaelic version of James, which is a very long and roundabout way of honouring Fitz’s middle name, but I still love having that connection. The middle name, Phillip, again, this name was a love of mine before this fic came about and it just seemed so natural to me that they would name their son after Coulson, and there was just no other name I liked so much with Hamish 

 Kathleen (Kathy) Skye FitzSimmons, born 30th May 1925 - I have no really grand explanation for this name, other than Kathleen is a special name to me, and I love using it in stories. It fit in well I thought with the 1920′s style of naming (yes I did that extensive googling) and as I say it is a very dear name to me and FitzSimmons are deserving of it. Skye, again, I’m just going through the checklist of names from the team. This was in NO WAY  a narcissistic naming, I promise, I just really think they’d give their child that as a middle name, as also this was my way of slipping a lil bit of Scottish into her name too. Just a smidge :)

 Hazel June Sousa, born 14th October 1926 - Oh Hazel. Hazel is just a name I really love. It is also the name of a dear friend of mine who I don’t get to see very often, and I just love it. Honestly I was just trying to find names that worked with the last name Sousa and Hazel just popped into my head. Again it works with 1920′s naming trends, (again with the googling) and yeah I just really love it. The middle name June comes from the fact that in this fic, Daisy and Sousa get married in the month of June. I thought that was a nice way of honouring their relationship, through their daughters name :)

Finley (Flint) Alphonso Mackenzie, born 28th May 1927 - So Mack and Elena adopting Flint is basically canon isn’t it??!?!? He is their son I will have no arguments. SO finding a name that Flint would work for as a nickname, bc lets be real no one was naming their child Flint in 1926, I had to find a roundabout way, was NOT EASY. I still have no idea how Flint could come from Finley, but it is close enough to make sense. By the time I got to Flint I had already named five children and was getting a bit lazy, and so his middle name is just the same as his fathers first name, which is still a very common middle name tactic. 

Emily Lorna FitzSimmons, born 12th October 1927 - Again, by the time I got to poor little Emily, I had named six children already. Emily I just like. Every Emily I have ever met has honestly been the nicest and sweetest person I have ever known. It has a good track record for me and it just sounds so nice with Fitzsimmons. Lorna, Lorna comes from my own personal headcanon for Fitz’s mum’s name, and so I think that’s where Lorna comes from, as a way of honouring Fitz’s mum.  It is also believed to derive from the name of the Scottish town Lorne, so snuck another bit of Scotland into baby FitzSimmons’s name :) 

Arthur (Archie) James FitzSimmons, born 14th August 1929 - If you all cast your minds back, at the very start of the Lady and the Chauffeur, I named Jemma’s dad, Lord Shieldshire, Arthur Simmons. So this was my way of honouring dear old Donk, but they call him Archie, just so he’s his own wee man. James, again, got a bit lazy, same middle name as Fitz. Also v Scottish name, we are 5/5 for Scottish baby FitzSimmons :)

Eve Margaret Sousa, born December 24th 1929 - Eve, well, she was born on Christmas Eve. I cast around for ages trying to find Christmasy names. She was Robyn for a little while, I considered Noel, but that felt a little too contemporary, so she was Eve! And yes, Margaret is my little wink to Agent Carter. I couldn’t help myself. 

Violet Faith Mackenzie, born 6th April 1930 - I actually had a lot of fun finding this name. I briefly considered calling her Hope, but no, that felt a little too on the nose for me. The name Violet comes from obviously the little purple flower, but the flower itself means hope, which I liked. Out of the three surnames, I feel like Mackenzie is the easiest out of all of them to find names for, (maybe it’s because I’m Scottish and know a fair few people with that Mac/Mc sound at the start of their surname) and I played around with a few possibilities, but honestly I just fell in love with Violet. Faith comes from the fact that faith is very important to both Mack and Elena and I wanted to consider that and honour that in the naming of their little girl. 

 Edward (Teddy) Donald FitzSimmons, born December 1st 1932 - The last (for real this time) little FitzSimmons baby of this verse. Blame Fitz being forever broody and Jemma just loving their babies so much, and also being an easy burst when it comes to Fitz and their babies. This name, boy oh boy, this name was HARD. Girls names for FitzSimmons babies, for some reason, easy as pie for me, I have a list as long as my arm of girls names I love for them. As for boys names, Hamish is the only one that has really stuck long term for me. All of the names I found for this poor wee boy that I liked were just a bit too modern, so I had to go searching again. I saw Edward, realised it could be shortened to Teddy and fell in LOVE. Only in this verse would I really get away with calling a baby Teddy so I took the chance and ran with it, and now little dark haired blue eyed Teddy FitzSimmons runs around rent free in my brain. His middle name, is not really obvious why I chose it at first glance. Again I struggled. I couldn’t really find any more Scottish names that I liked, or at least ones that i could give poor Simmons a fighting chance of pronouncing properly (Lachlan is still on my list and I have NEVER heard anyone not Scottish pronounce that first syllable properly). So Scottish was out, and so I went to my next mainstain of family names. And Deke or Enoch were the only two male names I hadn’t touched. Enoch was going to be impossible to find a link (trust me I tried) but DEKE, comes from a common nickname for Donald. So Donald he was. 

I hope you enjoyed this little (haha) list! I just love putting thought and meaning into names, and this kind of gives you a little glimpse into my naming process. Yes I know I will be a nightmare if I ever have children. That is a whole SEPARATE and ever changing and evolving list. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #304

“she’s got a hold on me  /  maybe she is just what they want me to be”

How many foreign friends do you have? Only one that I know of that actually immigrated into America in their life. I think. In which countries do they live? She was born in Asia, either China or Japan. What was your dream birthday party as a kid? I either wanted to go to the skating rink or Chuck E. Cheese. Have you ever come up with your own game? As a kid, definitely. Whose hand did you hold last? Probably my niece's or nephew's if they were taking me somewhere. What was the last thing you planted? Habaneros, I think. Do you have a green thumb or are you all thumbs with plants? I don't really try with plants because I'm not interested in the maintenance. What or who was the last thing you gossiped about? Does telling your therapist about another person and what they do to stress you out count? lol Any books on your night stand? Wings of Fire: The Brightest Night. Would you ever consider going vegetarian? I was briefly one, but I had to introduce meat back into my diet because I just hate too many foods needed to keep me healthy without meat. I would love love LOVE to go vegan, but I just can't. When's the last time you helped a senior citizen somehow? Probably holding open a door for someone in a wheelchair. What's the most selfless act you have done? I don't know... Maybe letting my mother use all my Christmas and birthday money (which was a lot) to take care of bills to keep us from being evicted and losing the car. She was going to pay me back, but then cancer happened. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? No. What makes you feel lucky? The fact I have a roof over my head, food on the table, access to water... That kind of stuff. Never take it for granted. How many Lidls are there in your town? One. Last time you went to Ikea, what did you buy? I don't believe we've ever bought anything from there? But I wouldn't really know. How do you like your favorite beverage? Really cold in a can, heeeeell yeah. What's your big family secret? We don't really have one. What did you think you were good at, until you saw someone else do it? I remember thinking I was the "gifted" artist in school until I met my acquaintance Cailin in the 5th grade, lol. She is SO talented. What is something nice going on in your life right now? My partial hospitalization program is going well. I'm getting more comfortable with talking via things like Zoom, it's a good opportunity for me to socialize with like-minded people almost every day, and I ADORE one of the teachers so much so that I want him to be my normal therapist. I have never in the entirety of my life felt less judged and more cared for from any therapist before him, and it's almost supernatural how easily this man reads people. You could twitch a certain way and he picks it up. I'm ready for him to teach more of the sessions. What was the pinnacle of wealth to you as a child? The idea of owning one of those toy crane machines, haha. If I saw one in a store, I would like beeeeg for it. I remember I cried once when I came across one I adored, it was just too expensive, lol. I did eventually get a little one, I think. What's something that you hate, but can't live without? My meds. What skill do you not talk about, because you feel it sounds like bragging? I don't really brag about anything I think I'm good at because I feel bad about it and don't wanna emit a "better than you" vibe. Who's the worst person you've encountered on the Internet? Ahhh, a lovely "friend" nicknamed Shakes. God she hated me. If death wasn't a consequence, what would you try? Probably ride a motorcycle. I'm too scared to risk the possibility of crashing, and those wrecks are nasty. What's the dumbest thing you've heard someone say? There's this one video of a TV show host thinking the moon was a planet and it was just- What is the worst smell you can remember? This smell was forever branded into my memory as if it was fuckin trauma. When my late dog Teddy had a massive, infected cyst near his ~you know~ and also wore diapers because of incontinence with his age (also keep in mind he had a UTI we couldn't afford to fix, and that smells bad enough), changing the diaper he would wear overnight could, swear to God, be enough to make you puke. It literally came to a point that I personally could no longer do it. It sounds so so bad and selfish, and it probably is, but Mom had to do it before she left and came home from work; she's way less fazed by stuff like that than me. Yes, when we had the money, we got the cyst removed. What song gets better the louder it gets? Only like, every song I enjoy. The louder the better until it becomes obnoxious to others. What's the biggest inconvenience that does NOT ruin your day? Having to pee at like an unnatural frequency? haha What's something everybody should know how to do? Cook... which I don't know how to do. What is a great movie no one knows about? I'unno. I don't really know the success level of most movies unless you see stuff about it everywhere. What type of person could the world use less of? Rapists, pedophiles, monsters like that. What makes you tingle? I have this odd reaction to rubbing my hand while someone is holding it???? idk why????? What’s the best Wi-Fi name you’ve seen? Oh MAN, I wish I could remember 'em all. I've seen some goodies. What's easy to learn, but hard to master? God, it's pathetic that my immediate response is related to a video game, haha. Then again it's such a common idea that it's basically a meme in the World of Warcraft community. So, playing hunters in the game. They're argued to be one of the - if not the - easiest classes in the game that requires little to no skill, while as a hunter main, I disagree with the second part firmly. I don't know about the other specializations because I don't play them, but at least in beast mastery, it takes focus and thinking ahead to master your rotation for optimal damage and just to generally be a skilled player of the class. Not to mention you need to watch your pet(s), too. What's something you've changed your opinion on? Wow, LOTS. Tons of political ideas, like my stance on gay rights, transgender folks, etc... If you had a refilling bowl, what would you want it to contain? For some reason my mind immediately jumped to fresh strawberries. I'm picky with the firmness of fruit, so I won't eat them if they're older because ew. If your bedroom had three portals to anywhere, where would they lead? I mean this in the least creepy way possible, but Sara's house so we could actually hang out, Dad's house so I could see him more, and then uhhh South Africa to regularly see meerkitties. You can ask any author one question about their story. What do you ask? Oh, I dunno. I've got some for writers of other media, but I guess by "author," you mean this is for books exclusively. If you have caffeine late in the day, does it cause you to struggle with your sleep? Shit, I wouldn't even know because I essentially always have caffeine in my system. I don't believe it affects me. When you struggle to sleep, what do you do instead? Keep trying to sleep, or more common than not, I do exactly what you shouldn't do and get back on the laptop for a while. Who was the last person you spoke to for the first time? How did you come to speak to this person? My most recent therapist in the PHP. I love love love him. The therapists rotate the days they teach, and he was the last one I met. Are there any TV shows from your childhood that you still watch today? I'm not opposed to it if I actually watched television. Do you enjoy buying gifts for other people, or do you never know what to buy them? If I actually have the money to, omg yes. I honestly do think I create or buy very thoughtful gifts, and I just really enjoy reminding other people that I love and think about them. Who were you with the last time you went out for a meal? My sisters, Mom, and I went to the Cheesecake Factory for my birthday dinner. That place has come to oust Olive Garden as my favorite restaurant, haha. What’s the last thing you watched on TV? Is this a programme you watch regularly? I believe it was this amateur cooking show called Nailed It!, I think it was, with my mom when I sat in the living room with her for dinner one night. Do you have a favorite documentary subject (eg. nature, celebrities, history, crime)? Absolutely animals. Does having to wear a mask stop you from doing anything, just because you dislike them or find them uncomfortable? Do not fucking talk to me if you're anti-mask. If I set foot in public, I'm wearing a mask like a goddamn considerate human being. Do you prefer zip-up or overhead hoodies? Overhead. I really dislike the appearance of zippers on them. If you have a yard or garden, how much time do you spend out there? N/A When was the last time someone bought you flowers? What was the occasion? I think it was the first time Tyler came to my house. This was quite a few years ago. When was the last time you stayed overnight away from home? Was this with friends, family or in a hotel somewhere? What was the occasion? Hell, I'm pretty sure I haven't slept over anywhere since the last time I was visiting Sara, which was like, two years ago. What’s your favorite period to learn about in history? What got you interested in this particular era? The Renaissance; I always found it to be an attractive subject, art being in its "glory days" and all. My Art History course in college really hooked me in. What is the smallest thing you lose your temper over instantly? Homophobic bullshit. What's a job that doesn't get enough respect? As others have said before me, teachers might just top the list. The shit they gotta put up with for so little pay... What did you take for granted until you visited another country? I've never left America, so I wouldn't know. Who is your favorite scientist and why? I don't have a favorite; I don't know nearly enough about any. Do you prefer emoticons or emoji? I'm from the emoticons era, so I'm biased, haha. How did you meet your pet? Roman was the kitten of one of my sister's mother-in-law's females. They have quite a cat problem and wanted to adopt the kittens out, and Mom knew I desperately wanted a cat, so there we go. One day when we were over there, she showed me the kittens, and Roman caught my eye instantly with his beautiful blue eyes. Venus, I "met" via the Morph Market, a reptile hub website for selling, as the name implies, reptiles that are generally morphs of their species. I was clicking through the genes, keeping my price ceiling in mind, and really fell in love with champagnes, and I thought Venus in specific was just absolutely beautiful. I officially met her as a little thing mailed to me, and she was and still is just the sweetest. I wanna point out that when I chose Venus, I hadn't the slightest idea that champagnes harbored "the spider gene," as otherwise I would have avoided adopting her and feeding the market. Regardless, I love her to death and wouldn't trade her out. Did/Do you have any PEZ dispensers? I did as a kiddo, yeah. Do you enjoy erotic stories? If so, do you read them or write them? No; they make me really uncomfortable. When writing RP, some scenes can get sexual, but I have my limits for sure and know when to stop writing and just time-skip. If you had to choose, which one would you rather have: a pet or a baby? Keep the baby away from me. Gimme a plains hognose or tarantula, please. ^Why did you choose the one you chose? I don't want kids at all but would love the mentioned animals as pets. Do you live with your parents or on your own/with a partner? I live with my mother. What's the car of your dreams? I don't have a "dream car." Have you ever witnessed something or someone die? Animals, yes. Has anyone ever told you that you snore or talk in your sleep? I don't snore, but I talk a LOT. Do you have any houseplants? No. Are you more on a laptop or a desktop computer? I only have a laptop, and I prefer them for portability's sake. If you could do absolutely anything, what would you like to do the most? Entirely leave behind my anxiety, probably. Or PTSD. Do you think your parents raised you well? Yeah. Dad didn't really take much part in "raising" us/enforcing rules and stuff, but hey, my sisters and I wound up being good people. Do you have a Facebook? Yeah. Do you know any of your neighbors? Definitely not well. We haven't lived here long at all. Does/did any of your relatives have an interesting, nowadays unusual job? I'm sure somebody does. Have you met your ideal partner yet? I think so. Have you had a serious relationship yet? If so, how many? Yeah, two. Do you enjoy books, magazines or comic books the most? Books. Are your parents old-fashioned or up-to-date about certain things? Dad is more old-fashioned I think, while Mom is pretty up-to-date. Do you or did you at some point keep a diary? I very briefly did on a few occasions. I always had a journal I wrote in during all my hospital stays. Have you ever upcycled trash into useful items? I remember I once followed this craft idea on Animal Planet where you turn a milk jug into a bird house. We never got any birds in it, though. Which color Skittle do you like best? The only right answer is red. What’s your favorite element? Of the classic four, fire. If you had your own radio show, what would it be like? YIKES, I don't want one. Don't make me talk in front of (through a radio or not) people. What has been the biggest surprise you’ve ever gotten? An "impossible" breakup over Facebook Messenger lmaoooo. Is there a holiday you can’t stand at all? There aren't any that I "can't stand," but I do hold at least some degree of dislike of ones bastardized by religion. It's disrespectful as fuck. Who is your favorite person in the whole world? My mom. Has there ever been an activity you became obsessed with? I was definitely obsessed with RPing in my early teens. Like, I ALWAYS wanted to be writing it. What has been the strangest place you ran into someone from your past? I can't think of an occurance. What is something people tend to come to you about? Anything related to English and grammar. If applicable, what's the furthest you've traveled because of a hobby? For purely a hobby, definitely not very far, partially because I can't drive or afford travelling via plane or whatever. Do you have souvenirs from other countries? If so, what and from where? N/A What do you do when someone is talking to you about something you don't care about? Pretend to be interested to avoid being rude. Do you have Photoshop installed on your computer? Yeah. Do you put lotion on after you get out of the shower? No, but I need to. Has anyone ever given you a promise ring? No. Do you have any bruises on you? Yeah, on my shin. When getting in Ash's van the other day, I hit it against the thing that helps you step up into the vehicle. Because of my muscle atrophy, I, and I am not kidding, can barely manage to absolutely yank myself up there. And mind you, her van isn't even very high up at all. My legs are just that damn weak. Any changes in appearance lately? Gaining weight is fucking lovely. Who was the last person to call you babe or baby? Probably a gal friend commenting on a selfie or something on Facebook. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Sometimes. Do you actually care about other's problems? Probably too much for my own good. Have you ever gotten a teddy bear from someone? Besides my mom, I don't think so.

[imagining-supernatural]

Avenging Angel: Part 42

Summary: You’ve spent the last five years on a dangerous mission to solve the crime that wrongly imprisoned your father. When the Winchesters find you half-frozen on the side of a mountain, they make it their own mission to save your life and make sure you stay alive. But after five years of uncovering horribly dark secrets, you’ve learned not to trust anyone. Especially people who seem like they have good intentions.

Word Count: 1714

Warnings: None

Avenging Angel Series Masterlist

*****

StonyGurl499: How’s the rich life treating you? ~t9

It had been a while since you’d been able to talk to t9. Ever since moving in with Braxton, finding time alone was hard. Any time you had to yourself, you used to snoop through his family’s life.

You had to find answers about your family somewhere.

You just had to.

LivingForFlyFishing: They use salad forks ~Up6Dn

LivingForFlyFishing: Like, for every meal

LivingForFlyFishing: Then they hire someone to wash the salad forks so they don’t have to do it themselves

LivingForFlyFishing: Because they can afford that shit

StonyGurl499: Wanted: Salad Fork Washer. Duties Include: Washing salad forks only. Not the soup spoons or dessert plates. Just the salad forks.

God, you’d missed joking with t9. It was a relief to have this moment, untouched by the gross manipulation you’d been weaving. Sure, you knew very little about t9, but they were your friend. You weren’t lying to them. They weren’t lying to you. There was no reason for them to lie to you.

LivingForFlyFishing: Shut up

LivingForFlyFishing: Have you found anything on the Cs?

StonyGurl499: I’m sure you’ve found more than I have

StonyGurl499: Dad C just seems like a sleazy businessman. Par for his course though

StonyGurl499: Your beau is pretty normal, as far as rich dudes go

Beau? That was a dated term if you’d ever heard one.

LivingForFlyFishing: Yeah, B seems normal. He’s nice. I hate doing this to him.

StonyGurl499: But you have to. For your dad. Right?

You barely spoke of your dad to t9. Sure, t9 was your friend, but your dad was the topic that you held closest to your heart. Beyond the hacktivist group you and t9 ran for a few months, you barely knew anything about them.

Except that they were rich enough to just wire you ten thousand dollars on a whim, whenever you needed it.

LivingForFlyFishing: Yeah. For my dad. I still feel slimy when I use the credit card B gave me. Feels like I’m committing fraud.

LivingForFlyFishing: When you gave me money, it wasn’t slimy

LivingForFlyFishing: How’d you get so much so fast anyway?

You trusted t9, sure. But that didn’t mean you were wary of them. Why they had decided to help you out was a mystery and you weren’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth… but I suppose you could try to take a peek.

StonyGurl499: Wired it from the Cs bank acct. Trust me. They’ll never notice my hack

LivingForFlyFishing: Haha. V funny. Keep your secrets if you want.

LivingForFlyFishing: but if you find something on the Cs and don’t share, Imma disown you

*****

*****

“You know, Y/N,” Dean started, purposefully not looking at you.

He had to keep going, right? Like, he couldn’t just stop once he started something. Not now. Not while you were stopped in the middle of nowhere getting gas on your way to kill your mother with your ex-boyfriend.

Besides, you only had a few minutes until Sam came out from the bathroom.

“Yes, Dean?” You prompted. You’d been on the road for hours, and this was the first time the two of you were alone. Obviously, Dean had waited until Sam left.

Dean huffed a deep sigh and rubbed the back of his neck. “You and I… We… well, we haven’t really had it easy. We haven’t always gotten along.”

“This is not news to me, dude.”

“Would you shut up and let me finish?” He whirled around and finally faced you. Exasperation, you’d found, was the easiest way to get Dean to stop procrastinating.

“I would if you would actually get to the point.”

“The point is that I actually think I like you. You’re good for Sam.”

How could words make you feel so warm? And so quickly? Your brain hadn’t even processed the words, but your heart felt warm. “Thanks, Dean. That… that’s really sweet.”

“Yeah, yeah. I just felt like I should say that. Just—just in case. You know, just in case…”

“Shit happens. I get it. I just… I don’t know. You’re the feel emotions in silence kind of person. Didn’t expect you to get all gushy.”

“Shut up,” he rolled his eyes and finished gassing up the car. And things were back to normal.

“No, seriously, while we’re doing this, you wanna, like confess anything else? Like… I don’t really know. But you’re already being all—”

“Fuck, Y/N, I try to be serious one time…”

“I like you too, asshole,” you said, laying a hand on his arm for a second before walking around the car. As soon as you had the barrier of the car between you, you leaned against the frame and looked him straight in the eyes. “I feel like this is it, Dean. By this time next week, everything is going to be done. It’ll be over with. So, I want you to know that even though we never really got along, I like you. And in a weird way, I even respect you.”

“You’re gonna make me say it too, aren’t you?”

“No,” you answered his question quickly. “And I’m not selfish enough to think that the few weeks I’ve spent with Sam will mean anything in the long run, but if something happens to me…”

“I’ll keep an eye on him,” Dean promised, eyes locked on yours. “I’m his big brother. It’s what I’ve always done.”

You managed a stiff smile. “He’s lucky to have you.”

“I could say the same about you.”

You were so done with this conversation. “You ready for this? Whatever comes next?”

“Sweetheart,” Dean replied, leaning against the other side of the car. “One thing I’ve learned is that we’re never ready for what comes next. But we’re gonna give it our all anyway.”

“Give it our all,” you repeated softly. “I guess the last five years of my life have built to this, hasn’t it?”

“One way or another, it’s all gonna end.” Dean let you turn those words over in your head while he finished up gassing up the car before he turned to you again. “You think you can handle it?”

The bell over the door to the gas station rang and you looked up to see Sam walking towards the two of you.

“I don’t know. Dean, I have no idea what I’ll do next. I mean, I started this insane mission to prove that my dad was innocent and… well… he’s d-dead. And I can barely believe everything I’ve learned since. And… I just don’t know.”

He nodded just as Sam reached your side.

“We good to go?” Sam asked, snaking his arm around your waist.

“At this point,” you said softly, keeping your eyes locked on Dean’s, “we don’t have an option, do we?”

“Let’s go.” Dean finished filling up the gas tank while Sam held open the back door of the Impala for you to get into.

The immediate second after Sam closed the door behind you, your phone rang. And you nearly ignored the call, but Braxton’s name lit up the screen and you answered after a deep breath. “Hey Brax. We’re, like, six hours away.”

“Change of plans, Y/N,” he replied. Dean and Sam both got into the car and looked back at you at the same time, immediately keying into the change in tone. As soon as the door were closed, neither spoke, waiting for your cue. And you waited for Braxton to explain. “We have an eye-witness placing your mom back in Virginia. She’s mobilizing her forces now. I’ve started moving my armies that way.”

“Armies,” you muttered under your breath. You hadn’t thought of the upcoming conflict as a battle, but I guess it was time to overcome your denial. “Right. Okay. So Virginia. I, uh, We’re not even close.”

“Tell me where you are and I can send a jet to you.”

You asked Dean where you were, since you’d been paying more attention to poring over your Dad’s research than the road. “Just outside of Grand Junction, Colorado.”

He repeated your location to someone beside him before returning to your conversation. “Drive to the Grand Junction airport. I have a jet in Denver that I’ll send to pick you up there.” There was a loud crash and he hurried to finish up the conversation. “Listen, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you when you’re on the jet, okay? It’ll be at the airport in just over an hour.”

“Okay.” What else do you say in these scenarios? “Be safe, Brax.”

“You too,” he said shortly, obviously distracted by whatever was happening where he was. “Talk to you soon. Love you. Bye.”

“I—yeah. Bye.” Love you? You literally just stabbed him. Like, not figuratively. You had a knife and you plunged it into his arm. “Uh,” you said, catching sight of the boys watching you expectantly. “He’s sending a jet. It’ll be at the Grand Junction airport in about an hour.”

“Airport?” Sam looked between you and Dean and sighed. “You gonna be good with that?”

The reminder at your HELLicopter ride made you want to reflexively punch him for subjecting you to the memory, but you managed to refrain. “Yeah. I’m good on planes. You can, you know, close the window and pretend you’re not in the air. Helicopters are just torture devices.”

Sam nodded slowly, clearly not fully convinced.

Then you caught sight of Dean shifting in the front seat and avoiding all eye contact.

“Dean?” You asked. His eyes flashed to yours briefly before he started fumbling with the keys, turning the car on. “Holy shit. You’re scared of flying.”

“Shut up.”

You couldn’t exactly tease him for his fear, since yours was so similar, so you just sat back.

Sam, however, had no such qualms. “Just my luck. I’ve gotta fly across the country with two people scared of flying. Got my brother scared of planes, my girlfriend scared of helicopters, and here I am. Scared of nothing.”

He smirked at the both of you, clearly teasing, yet enjoying himself all the same.

Dean, however, was not about to let his little brother get away with it. He turned, looked Sam right in the eyes, and simply stated: “Clowns.”

Which shut Sam up right up.

*****

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[cmfrtlvls]

Elizabeth Melsom Okamoto

Basic Background 

1996 Born in England and raised in Australia Mixed parentage Japanese Australian.

I just finished university, I decided to take a gap year to travel a bit before I started work. The main place I wanted to visit was Japan. The reason why I chose Japan is mainly because I wanted to improve my language skills. Which I actually have not done very much of, at all, but it’s been very rewarding in other ways.　

Knowing that everyone has a different upbringing, how is it like growing up in Australia being half and half?

For me it has never really an important part of my identity, being Japanese. Like maybe in primary school, every now and then people pointed out that I was Asian, but I definitely never felt Asian. Melbourne is such a multi cultural city and so by High School, a lot of my friends were Asian Australians. 

It was never a big deal. I never really felt all that Japanese. 

When I was younger, my Australian dad was mainly bringing us up, my Japanese mom worked really long hours and because of that I pretty much got only an Australian influence in my life. We didn’t really eat Japanese food, obviously I never learnt Japanese, or partake in any Japanese traditions, or anything like that. I was very much an Australian child.

I’m not too sure why it was like that, if she [my mum] made the decision to bring us up like that. She has said to me before that she made the decision to not teach us Japanese because she thought it might hold us back from some future opportunities in Australia if we become too Japanese. But she only told me that recently, so I don’t know if she is trying to justify her decision now, to a certain extent. I know that she wanted me to have as many opportunities as possible as an Australian. For me, now, it is a little bit disappointing that I was never exposed to my cultural identity when I was younger. 

How do you feel now that you are finally in Japan? 

It’s been more rewarding than I thought it would be. I never thought it would make me think differently about who I was, or anything like that. I understand my mum a lot more and her mannerisms, her character, because I see so much of that in the Japanese people I know here. 

It’s been eye opening in that sense. I do feel comfortable here, more than I thought it would. Obviously I am still an outsider, Japanese people don’t see me as a Japanese in any way, and I don’t either.  Despite that I still feel like I belong here in a way, as cheesy as it sounds. 

Do you feel a sense of belonging in Japan and Australia, both ways?  Did you have a “I don’t belong here!” moment anywhere?

I’m not patriotic about Australia at all. I don’t resent Australia, but I’m not proud to be Australian for a lot of historical reasons I am not going to go into. I never thought I didn’t belong in that country, but it was just never an important part of who I am. 

Never felt conflicted about nationality? 

Not really, no, it was never really an important part of my identity. I’ve always wanted to travel and live overseas. My nationality has never really played a part of my life. I don’t feel sentimental towards Australia.  

I’m not confused, I’m not in a conflict with myself. Rather I am figuring out how I feel about everything, living in Japan, and it’s not the easiest thing to put into words yet. 

Does this conversation make you feel…? haha

I am open to talk about these things, I just don’t know if I am clear headed in how I feel about all of it. So I am working through how I feel about being Australian, Japanese. If you asked these same questions 6 months ago I would have said “nah I am Australian. I don’t see myself as Japanese at all.” 

I don’t feel like I’m fighting, but I’m learning. I have never felt the need to take any action about being Japanese in my life. I didn’t have to make any decisions based on my ethnicity or anything like that.

Now that I have been here for a while and I have seen myself, not necessarily more Japanese, but I do understand that part of myself a bit more. It’s still a work in progress.

Is there “what if’s?”

Yeah! I would love to live in Japan, but because of the language barrier, I don’t think I’ll ever be accepted as Japanese. I’m sure you can empathize with that [Chiharu]. I’ll always be something of an expat living in Japan. Unless I could nail the language I think that’s all I’ll ever be. I’ll stand out regardless. I won’t be able to conform that easily in a Japanese society. Having said that I would love to come back to Japan to live here, if the opportunities arise. 

What are the perks of living in Japan?

It’s just nice to be in a country that is so different from what I have been brought up in, and yet I feel really comfortable. Almost the sense of it’s okay, I don’t want to say entitlement, to be who I am [being half Japanese], but I know I wouldn’t feel as confident living overseas by myself if it wasn’t in Japan. It’s so different, but it’s comfortable, it’s easy, it makes sense. 

Any positive or negative side to living in Australia?

I am super lucky to live in Australia, I have had a privileged upbringing. Mostly it’s been really positive. But obviously Australia is isolated from the rest of the world, I don’t love that aspect of it. Australia is a massive country but also an island, it’s not part of Asia, not part of Europe or America, it’s kind of its own continent in Oceania. Because of that, you have to make an effort to learn about the world. You need to read about it or watch a documentary in order to educate yourself, or you don’t really learn that much about the world otherwise. I’ve always been curious about traveling and the other countries, so that has been a draw back in Australia. 

You mention that where you are from is very multicultural. Would you say that Japan is multicultural as well?

Melbourne is very multicultural, and some of the other major cities in Australia are multicultural as well. I wouldn't say that’s true of the whole of Victoria, but my experience is that Australia is very multicultural because Melbourne is where I have always lived. Japan, I don’t think is as multicultural. If you are a foreigner, you get stared at, so you might start to feel like there may not be as many foreigners here. Even though I’m half Japanese, I look more caucasian than Asian, and so I get stared at like a foreigner. 

Do you think you would stand out in other parts of the world? 

I have done a bit of travelling around Asia, but I haven’t really been to that many other western countries in Europe or America, so I don’t really know yet. My impression is that I wouldn’t stand out as much, but I might be naive. 

Do you see yourself staying in Japan long term?

No plans yet. It’s hard, my career has set me in Australia for the near future, but I don’t want that to be my forever. I would like to live overseas. I‘d like to live in Japan because I see it as something doable for me with my citizenship here. But I think I would be happy to live in any other country as well. I definitely don’t want to live in Australia my whole life. 

Do you think you think you can define home right now?

Home is Melbourne because that’s where my family, my partner, my friends are, and my whole life. At the same time I don’t feel that attached to Australia. I’m also really happy when I’m overseas, I can see myself building something I guess, even if it seems ambitious now. I could make it home.  This is the first time I have lived overseas, so I can’t really say for sure, but that’s the feeling I get. 

What is your plan after Japan?

Well, yeah. I have to go back and work in 8 months’ time in corporate law as a graduate. This is the first time I will work in this industry, seriously, full time. So for a year and a half I’ll be stuck (no i shouldn’t say that *laughs*) I will be stationed in Melbourne.  After that I’m hoping that I can move to another location so I will be grabbing whatever opportunity I can take. But no concrete plans yet, I definitely need to have a lot of discussions with people when I get home.  

[wildandsexyjacks]

Boo

So I missed Yuta’s birthday but this blog is still on halloween lockdown so... Ghost!Yuta + #60 from this Halloween prompts list

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: mild swearing

It’s just an old house, you tell yourself. Just an old... abandoned... supposedly haunted house. No big deal. You’re gonna do what you came to do, then get the hell out and collect your money.

Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Right?

As you sweep the door open, its hinges squeak loudly, making you jump a little. You quickly look behind your back to find your friends laughing on the sidewalk. 

“You don’t have to do it if you’re scared, Y/N!” your best friend shouts, amused.

“Shut up, Taeyong, just because you’re a pussy doesn’t mean I have to be one too.” You shout back, then take a deep breath and step inside.

It’s going to get dark soon, so you fish for your phone in your back pocket and turn the flashlight on. The living room is empty except for some old furniture covered with white sheets. Dust and spiderwebs are scattered everywhere, and a beautiful crystal chandelier hangs from the ceiling.

Whoever lived there in the past was filthy rich.

The place has been abandoned for as long as you can remember, after a string of strange accidents happened to its owners over the years, most of the time during Halloween. The rumor running around town was that a family from Japan had been the last owners, in the 80s, but their only son died in another one of those weird accidents, so the grieving couple closed off the house and left to never come back. After that, homeless people would sleep there sometimes but they never stuck around for more than one or two nights, claiming the place was haunted by evil spirits.

Now the old house has only been used by stupid kids who want to scare their friends or for Halloween shenanigans, the latter being the reason why you’re there after sundown in the spookiest night of the year. You’ve never been one to be scared of ghosts, so when Johnny dared you to go inside and take something from the kitchen as proof you’ve been there, you thought it’d be the easiest 50 bucks ever.

Now, all alone in this creepy place, you’re starting to change your mind.

"There's nothing to be afraid of, there's nothing to be afraid of, there's nothing to be afraid of..." you mumble repeatedly, trying to convince yourself.

“Actually,” an unknown voice echoes somewhere behind you “it’s Halloween. Plenty of things to be afraid of, tonight.”

You jump and scream, turning around to swing your phone’s flashlight randomly around the room. A beautiful boy perks his head up from where he was resting on the couch.

“Jesus! No need to scream like that, you’re gonna wake the dead.” he laughs like he just told a great joke while you clutch your heart.

“What the fuck????” you shoot daggers at him with your eyes, then look around “It’s not funny, Johnny!” You yell to no one in particular and turn to the boy again “What the hell are you doing here?”

“What?” he sits up, and crosses his arms in front of his chest, annoyed “I live here. What are you doing in my house?”

You roll your eyes.

“Very funny. How much did Johnny pay you to scare me? I hope it was worth getting your ass kicked for it.” You charge at him.

He jumps off the couch and away from you.

“So you break into my house and threatens violence unprovoked. A real-life princess.”

“Oh, cut the crap, I’ve lived across the street my whole life, this house’s been abandoned for decades.”

You shove your phone on his face and take a good look at him. A real look at him. He’s a good looking guy, probably the same age as you, with sharp features and black hair falling to his eyes. But there’s something off about the way he looks, though you can’t exactly pinpoint what.

He flashes you a beautiful smile.

“So you’ve never heard of the super handsome, crazy smart, incredibly cool, very sexy young man who moved in from Japan around.... thirty years ago?”

He steps forward and then you realize what seems wrong about him.

It’s blood.

There’s blood on his forehead and the sleeve of his grey sweater.

You take a subtle step back, your face pale.

“Well yeah... but he’s dead. Had an accident at home, when his parents came back it was too late already.”

He scoffs.

“Accident? That’s how Mark calls it, for sure, but the son of a bitch pushed me down the stairs.” you must be looking shocked because he shrugs and adds “Don’t worry, that’s all water under the bridge now. He lets me kill him every Halloween to make up for it. I mean not kill kill him, you can’t really kill someone who’s already dead but it hurts like a bitch and that’s enough for-“

“You’re dead.” You mutter. “Are you.... are you a ghost?”

He winks.

“Boo.” when you don’t react, he frowns “You’re not scared.”

You are scared. VERY scared, to be honest, but you shake your head anyway. Even though you’ve never seen anything with your own eyes, the paranormal is not a new concept in the daily life of your family. For a long time, you thought your parents were crazy or just flat out lying, but here it is, a real ghost, in the flesh... Well, sorta.

“My dad is a parapsychologist, he says we have no reason to fear spirits as they can’t hurt us.”

“Oh but on Halloween they can.” He walks up to you and runs a finger down your arm. As far as you know he was not supposed to be able to touch you, and it feels.... weird. “You see... you shouldn’t visit cursed places in a night like this, darling, it’s when monsters come out to play.”

For the first time since you entered the house, a shiver goes down your spine. However, when you’re about to run for your life, he breaks out laughing.

“Oh, relax, I’m not gonna hurt you. I know who you are, we hang out with your cat a lot, he’s pretty cool.”

You frown.

“We?”

“Yeah. Me, Mark, Taeil... Everyone who’s ever died in this house is still here, we can’t leave.” he sits down on the couch and you automatically follow “I’m Yuta, by the way.”

He offers his hand, but you’re too freaked out to be polite. You lean in and touch his forehead, then poke his cheek, his shoulder.

“How come you’re not transparent? Why can I see you? Why can I touch you? Why can you touch me? Why can’t you leave? How did you die?”

“Okay, Ms. Curiosity, stop it.” he pushes your hand away and clears his throat. “There are some things about Halloween you don’t understand. It’s the one night when the veil between your world and whatever there is beyond that is lifted or whatever, that’s why you can see me and touch me. It’s also the only night we can go out of the house as long we come back by sunrise. My friends are all out there having the time of their after-lives terrorizing kids.”

You frown.

“If it’s the only night you can go out, why are you here alone?”

Yuta lifts his hand and touches his injured forehead. His fingers come out dipped in blood.

“I had a headache. Haha get it? A headache?”

“You’re not funny.” You roll your eyes when he winks at you again.

“Seriously though, what are you doing here?” He perks his head up to look through the dirty windows “It’s starting to get too dark, you shouldn’t be visiting places like this, all sorts of weird things happen on Halloween. You might think I’m joking but it really is dangerous.”

Just as you’re preparing your answer, Johnny calls out for you from the outside, asking why it’s taking you so long to take a stupid mug from the cupboard.

“I’ll be right there!” You shout back, then turn to Yuta again. “That’s the reason. My friend dared me to come in and take something from the house.”

He nods his head in a thoughtful way.

“So breaking and entering, violence AND thievery... I think I’m in love.”

You snort and shove his shoulder.

“Stop flirting with me, Casper.”

He shrugs.

“Can’t help it, you’re pretty and I’m a Scorpio.”

“You’re dead.”

“It does not stop us, as you can see.”

With your face burning hot, you jump off the couch and immediately change the subject.

“Do you mind? Me taking something, I mean. It’s not like you’re gonna use any of this stuff... Right? I’ll make 50 bucks if I come out carrying anything from here.”

He gets up too, and takes your phone from you, lighting the way to the kitchen.

“Sure, why not?”

You walk side by side while Yuta talks about anything that comes to his mind. Glancing at him, you notice he’s overly excited to have someone over. It makes you wonder when was the last time he met someone new. It must be pretty lonely to be stuck in this old house for so long.

“So for the rest of the year you can’t touch anything or appear to anyone? Why are there so many rumors of this house being haunted then?”

He’s busy roaming through the cupboards and doesn’t hear you the first time, so you call him again and repeat when he finally turns to you.

“I can appear in some sort of semi-corporeal form if I concentrate hard enough, but it’s kind of tiring, so I only do it when I’m in the mood to scare the shit out of someone or if they’re super annoying. Most of the time I don’t really care.” He laughs “Winwin HATES visitors, he probably is the famous evil spirit people talk about around town. Here,” Yuta hands you a chipped mug. At first, you think it’s just a plain white one, but you look inside and see that the bottom of the mug is printed in a black font reading You've been poisoned. “Your bravery token, Ms. I’m-Not-Afraid-Of-Ghosts.”

You laugh, hugging the mug against your chest.

“It’s Y/N. You can call me Y/N.” you take your phone back, then lean in and give him a quick peck on the cheek “Thank you, Yuta. It was nice to meet you.”

He brings his hand to where you kissed him, eyes wide, and you turn around to leave.

“You know...” Yuta calls again but averts your gaze when you look over your shoulder “I could be...” he clears his throat, kicking the foot of the table lightly “I could be persuaded... to appear... if you ever want to hang out again....”

You bite back a smile.

“I can bring my laptop... Do ghosts watch Netflix?”

He sighs.

“I have no idea what that is.”

It’s your turn to wink at him.

“You will find out then.”

-

NOTE - this week i’ll still be writing halloween-themed stuff, feel free to request if you have something in mind or just pick a number from this list. Here you can find information on what i write and who i write for

[vensoul]

So.. I’m kinda gonna do this 40 question for writers thingy because I’m bored and I think it’ll be fun!

Gonna tag.. @erenaeoth ok let’s gooo

Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic: I stay in the mlm realm typically. I like writing slow burns and long stories but sometimes I’ll cook up a one shot

Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to? : I really really wanna write a kinda forbidden love story but I don’t know how many people are down to read about internal and external homophobia :/

Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole? A/B/O never.

How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?: I have so many fic ideas bro. I really really really wanna write a Shane/Rick slow burn but I have too many slow burns already

Share one of your strengths. I like angst?

Share one of your weaknesses. Not very good at making people cry

Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it. Viktor knows the cause of his father’s pain. Supposedly, Balboa, Creed, and Drago were at a party celebrating Balboa’s win again. And it was great for awhile, before some guy tried to pick a fight with Creed. Drago had to break up the fight, and not too long after he had stopped it, Creed was stabbed. So there Ivan was, staring at Apollo desperately trying to stay alive. He could recite every detail. Hand on his bleeding abdomen, the blood running from out of his mouth. Balboa trying to get somebody to help them, yet nobody would help. Apollo’s last words, everything. His friend died in his arms, and it messed with him. In more ways than he could explain, he couldn’t even eat for awhile.

Okay, so I was experimenting with an idea for Rocky and I guess I’m proud of the fact that I can be creative with the way I can bend timelines?

Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it. The two of them locked eyes with each other, Rambo only began to get more nervous than he already was. Neither of them were sure what to say, there wasn’t much to talk about. Neither of them wanted to talk, they barely knew each other. But, assuming that the conversation didn’t have to be about the war, Austrian vet scratched his facial hair, before sitting up straight.

“What’s going through your mind?”

His Austrian accent was probably thicker than the hair on John’s head. John sat in silence for a moment, what was going through his mind? Could he find anything else that wasn’t related to a painful experience? Anything at all?

”Blank.”

John probably spoke for the first time in days, and the change in his voice even surprised him a little. The best way the Austrian vet would describe it, there was not a shred of hope in his voice.

I’m proud because it’s stallonezenegger I love Arnold and Sly they are so 😌💕💕💕

Which fic has been the hardest to write? Warmth.. I’m not straight so writing wlw is kinda hard bc i’m not rlly invested in it?

Which fic has been the easiest to write? Theraputic, Fighting Spirit. Anything with Arnold or Sly or any of my other faves really..

Is writing your passion or just a fun hobby? For me it’s both! I’m passionate about writing but it’s something I do bc it’s a rlly fun hobby for me uwu

Is there an episode above all others that inspires you just a little bit more? Episode? Not really but I guess Rocky has changed me a bit 🤠

What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across? My friends suggest that I try to be more descriptive.

What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across? None so far

If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose? Please film Fighting Spirit, sly please Adonis and Viktor are dating

If you only could write one pairing for the rest of your life, which pairing would it be? Sly and Arnold..

Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order? From start to finish, I didn’t know you could write any other way.

Do you use any tools, like worksheets or outlines? I sometimes use notes to keep track of the plot so I don’t forget it

Stephen King once said that his muse is a man who lives in the basement. Do you have a muse? No?

Describe your perfect writing conditions. At night alone or in a dark place 💕

How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting? No.. not always.

Choose a passage from one of your earlier fics and edit it into your current writing style. (Person sending the ask is free to make suggestions). Do I really wanna do that? In another post.

If you were to revise one of your older fics from start to finish, which would it be and why? A fic I deleted called new home, it was a fic where Kano was a dad with kids and yea it was crazy

Have you ever deleted one of your published fics? Mmhm, I deleted the Kano as a dad fic, then I deleted a Kano/Terminator fic and i don’t even know why I wrote that but it’s funny, then I accidentally deleted a letter John wrote to the T-800. So yeah.

What do you look for in a beta? ...A bottom??

Do you beta yourself? If so, what kind of beta are you? I’m verse but we’re not ready for that conversation.

How do you feel about collaborations? Depends?? But I’m open to it.

Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much. AAA @erenaeoth @badbessie and someone on ao3 but idk if he has tumblr. They’re stories always keep me interested, and they’re everything I wanna be in a writer and I just 😭

If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose? yo.. lemme write a sequel to this Viktor/Adonis fic called trust fall. BRO

Do you accept prompts? I don’t just accept them, I need them.

Do you take liberties with canon or are you very strict about your fic being canon compliant? I will do some things with canon compliant if it benefits the plot idea I have but all my fics are usually set in AUs. Kinda?

How do you feel about smut? I well.. it’s hard for me to write bc I just.. embarassment. It’s slightly hard for me to read to bc it’s like hhh bro i just wanted y’all to cuddle

How do you feel about crack? It can be funny as fuck the less sense it makes

What are your thoughts on non-con and dub-con? I mean.... i’m very touchy about it. Maybe if it was used correctly and it was for a plot then yea. But if someone is genuinely into it it’s like... ur into a federal crime sir.

Would you ever kill off a canon character? I have... and I’d do it again

Which is your favorite site to post fic? AO3, can’t imagine posting anywhere else really. WELL, tumblr maybe.

Talk about your current wips. Currently working on a Rocky/Apollo oneshot, then after I finish that I’m making Florian/Masias. It’s crazy

Talk about a review that made your day. Ughh anytime somebody compliments my writing 🥺

Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them? I haven’t gotten one yet! Haha only criticism. I’ll listen to what they have to say, then use what they say to try and better my writing

Write an alternative ending to Theraputic.

..... in another post doe 👀

[lovemesomesurveys]

How do you feel about full length beards? I’m not into a lot of facial hair. I like some scruff, but that’s it. Have you ever been to a circus? Yeah, once. I was naive and didn’t know about the abuse that went on at the time. Do you know anyone who’s gone to a Fat Camp? No. Do you use Facebook IM everyday? No. I don’t even remember the last time I used it. How many surveys have you done already today? This is my first.

What’s the WORST show on Adult Swim? I don’t care for the Adult Swim shows. Family Guy and American Dad is okay, but after that it gets too stupid and weird for me. Sorry. Like once I saw this show, Mr. Pickles, and uh... wtf. The episode I saw was very disturbing. I don’t get the appeal of Rick and Morty at all. And why the hell is Mike Tyson Mysteries a thing? That’s just to name a few. I see previews of other shows and I just... wow. Do you have any relatives that have shunned you, or vice versa? No. Has anyone ever posted a HORRIBLE picture of you for everyone to see? Not maliciously or because they thought it was horrible and wanted to embarrass me, but yeah. My mom has posted photos where she didn’t see anything wrong and she thinks I looked fine, but I was like EW NO take that down it’s hideous. I reallyyyy don’t like photos of me taken by someone else. I have to take my own photos if I’m going to take one at all because I know the angles and lighting and can add a filter. Plus, I can take a ton before finally settling on one. If someone else takes the photo and they want to post it, I have to approve. Which grade in school was the most fun for you? I enjoyed elementary and middle school. High school had its ups and downs, but there were parts I liked. I liked the last 2 years the best. Which would you rather have, a new puppy or kitten? I wouldn’t want another pet right now to be honest. We have our doggo and one suits our family best right now. Does drama seem to follow you everywhere you go? No, thankfully. I have other issues I struggle with, but not drama. Do you ever just want to go away to a new place where no one knows you? I don’t live in a small town where everyone knows everyone and I was never Miss Popularity, so apart from family and a few other people, not a lot of people know me. However, I do want move away to a new place. My family and I have wanted to for a long time, we just haven’t been able to. A change of environment and scenery would be really nice. You’re ordering a pizza, you can have any kind of toppings, what are they? I’m a simple gal, I just like white sauce, feta and ricotta cheese, garlic, spinach, and crumbled meatballs with pesto drizzled on top. Do you hit ‘quiet’ or ‘ignore’ on your cell? Which one usually? Nah. If my phone rings and I don’t want to answer it, I just let it ring. Do you ever regret giving your number to people? I have before with some people. Have you ever been told that you’re afraid of your own shadow? Haha yeah. Have you ever tried Gouda cheese? Nope. Does/did your high school have pop machines? No. They decided to remove them the year I entered high school, which I was mad about. Do you use a public computer, or do you have your own? I have my own laptop. Do you ever find it odd how you type LOL when you’re not really laughing? >> No, because I understand that its function has moved far beyond representing actual laughing-out-loud. <<< Yeah. I remember discussing that in a class once. Have you ever gambled? A couple times. Not my thing. Although, what really made my experience unenjoyable wasn’t so much the gambling, it was that the casinos I’ve been to allow smoking and I don’t do well with cigarette smoke. At all. It gives me a killer headache, makes my heart rate go up, and makes me feel dizzy and sick. It’s awful. The smell in the casinos was too overbearing for me, so I spent very little time inside. Do you know anyone who’s won the lottery? No. If you could work at any retail store, which one would it be? I really don’t want to work retail. And that’s not shade toward retail workers AT ALL. I salute you, honestly. You deal with a lot of shit. What’s the shortest you would ever cut your hair? I had a “bob” for a few years. Do you listen to any deathcore? No. Do you subscribe to any teen magazines? Which ones? No. I’m also 30 years old. Do you know someone who never smiles? Never? No. Has anyone ever made you feel uncomfortable at work? I’ve never had a job. Do you still watch South Park? I never did. I mean, I’ve seen bits here and there before because my brother used to watch it, but I was never into it myself. Tell me one movie you’ve seen recently that sucked: My mom, brother, and I recently watched this movie on Netflix called, The Platform. It had potential and was interesting at first, but the ending was just... no. It seemed abrupt and I was just really confused. Have you ever carved something into a dinner booth somewhere? No. When’s the last time you were carded at a bar? When I last went to the bar, which was almost 10 years ago. Do you smoke little cigars? Have you ever tried them? Nooo. You’re babysitting, what do you expect per hour for pay? Pfft, no I’m not babysitting. What’s the last thing you returned at a store? I very rarely return things so I have no idea. It’s been a long time. What’s the name of the last cat you pet? I don’t even recall the last time I petted a cat. Do you still look at clouds and make shapes of them? I haven’t in a long time. If you had to dye your hair for one year, what color would you pick? I already do, I dye it red. Who’s got your heart? Me. What’s your television addiction? I have several shows that I’m into. Have you ever stringed green beans before? No. What do you do to make yourself more relaxed when you’re nervous? It’s hard to calm myself when I’m anxious, but I try to distract by talking to someone, listening to ASMR, watching TV or something on YouTube, or reading.  Do you cook? If so, what’s the last thing you made? The only thing I cook is ramen. Oh wait actually I made a grilled cheese sandwich the other day. ha.  Have you ever had any painful dental work done? If so, what? Yeah, a few things. How do you usually spend your Saturdays? I spend all my days and nights the same, really. Do you make your own jewelry or clothing? Last year I briefly got into making beaded bracelets. I made a few. What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re bored? I do the same things everyday whether I’m bored or not: spend time on my social medias, watch YouTube, read, watch TV, scroll through Tumblr, do surveys, just lie there.... ha. Somedays just feel like they’re dragging and going by extra slow and the things I listed above that I like doing just don’t cut it so I just lie there mindlessly watching TV or go to sleep. Do you use drawing to describe what you’re feeling? No. Do you like the smell of new school supplies? As a kid I did. Like getting a new box of crayons. Do you give everything you do 100%? No. I certainly haven’t with life... Do you shop at any independent music stores? No. I don’t shop at any music stores. How do you feel about mainstream music? I like a lot of it.

What song lyrics describe your mood at the moment? *shrug* Do you have healthy eating habits? No. My eating habits are messed up. I have issues with appetite and other issues.

If you could transform into any kind of animal, what animal would you be? A dog. Are you superstitious? If so, what are you superstitious about? I do the knock on wood thing, but it’s just out of habit, really. If you could travel anywhere in the world where would it be? There’s so many places I’d like to visit. What food disgusts you the most? I don’t do seafood at all. What is your favorite thing to cook? Ramen. One place you would never want to get lost in in the dark? I wouldn’t want to get lost anywhere in the dark. :O Are you claustrophobic? Yes. What is your worst flaw? Oh where to start. One thing that always creeps you out? ALL bugs. What is your biggest fear? Losing loved ones, death, never getting better/getting worse, never doing anything with my life and just wasting away... If you could be reincarnated, would you come back as another human or an animal? If an animal, what kind? I don’t believe in reincarnation. Ideal way you’d like to die? Obviously painlessly, but jeez. If you could be roommates with anyone of your choice, who would you pick? I like living with my family. What is the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard? Uh, a lot of things. Your favorite kind of dog? I love doggos, but I definitely have a special thing for Labs and German Shepherds. Do you have any scars? If so, how many? I have a lot of scars. I’m not going to count them. What is your favorite scary movie to watch in the dark? I don’t watch them in the dark. Unless I’m at the theater, obviously. I love scary movies, though. Would you rather be buried or cremated when you die? Cremated. What is your favorite thing to drink? Alcoholic and non alcoholic? Coffee and Starbucks Doubleshot energy drinks. That’s also coffee, but you know what I mean. I don’t have a favorite alcoholic drink, I don’t drink. What is your favorite food around the holidays? I love either ham or turkey depending on the holiday and mashed potatoes with gravy, stuffing, and rolls. Easiest way to scare you? I’m such a jumpy, easily scarable (it’s a word, shh) person so you could really just say hi and I’ll jump. haha. Like my back faces my bedroom door and if I don’t hear anyone coming in or they just poke their head in to say something I’ll jump. lmao. Tell me one of your biggest secrets? Nah. What was your last nightmare about? It’s been awhile since I’ve had one, thankfully.