#the one to blame

[pianokantzart]

The One to Blame (Part 3)

Part 1 Part 2

Content Warning: Blood, trauma, graphic description of injuries

______

As the airship rose to the top of the castle where Bowser stood, Mario, Toad, and Princess Peach shared a silent agreement that their only goal at this point was to get Luigi to safety. They soon learned, once they got a better look at the situation, that this would require the difficult task of freeing Luigi from Bowser’s grasp without accidentally breaking his neck, as the koopa’s hand was still clamped down over the man’s face like the teeth of a bulldog. But they had the element of surprise on their side. The appearance of Peach outside of her cage and the reemergence of a “conquered” foe was a dual shock that caused Bowser to lower his guard, and Toad used the opening to launch a cannonball into the koopa king’s shoulder. Incredibly, the impact wasn’t enough to cause any serious damage, but it was enough to elicit a roar of pain as he released his captive to hold his injury. The second Luigi was dropped Mario and Peach rushed in and ushered his limp form to the deck of their airship.

Their greatest stroke of luck was that the warp whistle hadn't been wasted. Early in Mario's journey there was no small amount of temptation to use it to avoid certain dangers they encountered on their way to The Dark Lands, though they knew it was far wiser to save it for the journey back when things would likely be at their worst– which proved to be an understatement. By the time Luigi was on board the stollen vessel, Bowser’s pursuing forces had joined the battle, and the great flying galleon was rendered barely able to stay airborne amidst the damage laid into its hull by the attacking clown cars, bullet bills, and the jet of flames Bowser spat out in rage.

Toad, clinging to the ship’s controls in a struggle to keep them from free falling, blew into the whistle on Peach’s command, and with a shrill tweet the quartet disappeared from Bowser’s view along with the crumbling ship.

In a flash, they reappeared in The Mushroom Forest just outside of Peach’s beloved kingdom. A gentle rain shower had blown in during their absence; another stroke of luck that extinguished the flames of the airship as it finally succumbed to the damage and crashed, toppling giant mushrooms in its path as it landed with a heavy thud in the cool, damp earth. Toad braced himself against the steering wheel. Princess Peach and Mario pressed around Luigi to hold him steady.

Once all was still, save for the sound of falling rain and the creak of the airship as it settled deeper into the mud, Mario was first to act, his greatest impulse being to start carrying his brother toward civilization. When Toad emerged from the driver’s seat and finally got a proper look at the severity of Luigi’s condition, he followed suit, struggling to find some unbroken part of the man by which to pick him up until Princess Peach stopped him with a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“We’ve moved him around too much already. Wait for help to come.”

She pointed to the Mushroom Kingdom in the distance. Toad looked, and could see glimmer of lamp lights already venturing closer– excited soldiers and citizens who had noticed the ship’s appearance from a distance, and were now eager to see whether or not Mario’s mission had been successful.

Toad nodded and stayed put.

Mario, however, seemed blind and deaf to everything except his own misguided determination. He grabbed Luigi under his arms, struggling to lift his dead weight until he caught a good look at his brother’s face, and froze. Up until now, Mario had seen little of Luigi’s features through the fog of adrenaline. They had mostly been either hidden in Bowser’s hand, or masked by a thick layer of blood. 

The rain had now washed most of the blood away, though more continued to flow from Luigi’s mouth, nose, and ears, turning Mario’s white gloves a ghoulish shade of pink in his effort to carry him.

Mario's mind– struggling to comprehend what it was seeing– couldn’t help but compare the appearance to smashed bread dough or a dropped cake. He felt lightheaded and distant, like all was little more than a lucid nightmare.

Luigi’s lips, purple, swelled, and split, parted to mutter something that Mario struggled in vain to understand, and in his anxiousness he mistakenly stepped on the ruined remains of the shattered leg, causing the mutter to break into a gargled scream so horrible that Mario panicked and collapsed under his brother’s weight. Toad and Princess Peach acted quickly. They grabbed the duo as they fell, Toad taking charge of Luigi to carefully guide him back down to the floor while Peach wrapped her arms around Mario and pulled him off the deck of the downed ship, away onto the grass at the base of the wreckage. She did so with more aggression than intended. She was expecting a fight, but was dismayed when the plumber numbly allowed himself to be dragged away without resistance, fists clenched and shaking with sobs. Seeing this, she switched tactics. She held him tight and spoke quiet reassurances, struggling to hold back tears of her own. “He’ll be fine. You did it. You saved him. I promise you, with all of my heart, he’ll be alright.” Mario barely heard her over the continued patter of rain. The distant lantern lights rushed closer, rumbling in on a blur of color and voices. There were tugs on his sleeve that were batted away and a few muffled voices saying his name– conversations swelling and falling in volume as his mind drifted. ___

Mario recalled that in the short span of time since he had moved to The Mushroom Kingdom, he became renowned as the one who put an end to Bowser's reign of terror. Naturally, this meant Mario was the first person everyone looked to when Bowser was broken out of prison by his minions and successfully captured Princess Peach during his escape. They gave a lot less credence to Luigi’s abilities. The toads liked him well enough, but he was rarely regarded as anything more than “Mario’s brother.” Up until Bowser’s escape Mario had found this annoying, but when his own reputation came with the burden of responsibility he saw a bright side: Luigi had no obligation to go anywhere or do anything that would put him in danger. Mario had hoped to one day go on adventure with his brother (albeit in circumstances far less dire), but he knew that his own dreams and those of the ever-cautious Luigi were not always going to perfectly align, and this time Mario was determined not to act mindlessly like he did back in Brooklyn when he first started the plumbing business, or when he tried to save the flooding city. He would not throw himself into danger while fully expecting his sibling to follow in his footsteps.

To his surprise, Luigi had already readied a backpack full of supplies the moment he heard word of The Princess’ capture, fully anticipating adventure well before Mario relayed his plan to embark on a rescue mission. He even seemed almost disappointed to hear that the effort was in vain, as Toad already had a pack prepared with the essentials. “Well, it couldn’t hurt,” Luigi shrugged, shoving an extra box of matches into the front flap of the backpack before hoisting the straps onto his shoulders and heading toward the doorway. In the long run, his extra provisions would provide them with only some ramen cups and an extra blanket before the pack met its end in The Seaside Kingdom– grabbed in the beak of a cataquack, ripped from his back, and torn to pieces. But in that moment of preparation, losing spare supplies was the last thing Mario was worried about, and with a determination that surprised even himself he moved to intercept his brother before he reached the doorway. “Wait! Luigi, are you sure you want to do this?” Luigi stopped and stared with a confused expression. “What do you mean?” “This journey is going to eventually take us to The Dark Lands. Do you really want to go back there?” “Ha! no!” Luigi said, forcing a laugh. “But The Princess risked her life to save me. It’s only right that I do the same for her.” Luigi tried to side-step his brother, but Mario mirrored his motions to stay in the way. “We may end up facing up against Bowser again! This time we won’t have any superstar to help us out.” “But I’ll have you, won’t I? And nothing can hurt us as long-” “-As long as we’re together. I know. I know. I just…” Mario trailed off, unable to quite find the words to explain why he was so uncertain. There was more to his hesitation than just a desire to allow Luigi to make his own choices. At this point, his choice his clear. But ever since the incident in the warp pipe (and everything that followed), Mario had become far too aware of the effect his actions had on his brother. He suspected that was why he had this ugly feeling in the pit of his stomach that if they took on this mission as a team, something terrible would happen. Luigi sighed. He gave the tops of his hands an anxious rub before he spoke again. “Look, Mario, I won’t go if you don’t want me to, but first you gotta look me in the eye and say it…” He leaned down so they were face-to-face, and stared at him with a somewhat comedic intensity. “… Just say ‘Luigi, I don’t want you to come with me,’ and I’ll leave you to it. Promise.” In the end, Mario didn’t have the heart to say it. His nagging fear did not outweigh his desire to embark on this adventure with his brother by his side, and part of him knew Luigi wouldn’t have given that ultimatum if he suspected he’d actually follow through. He wanted to come, that much was clear. Who was he to tell him “no”? And it had gone so well up until the end! They were as good adventurers as they were plumbers, if not better. Mario was certain he wouldn’t of gotten half as far as he did without Luigi watching his back, and whenever Luigi was scared or cornered all he needed to do was shout “Mario” and– ___

Before he could finish the thought, Mario felt his heart seize up. His whole body felt in free-fall when he suddenly realized what Luigi had been trying to say earlier through shattered teeth and a broken jaw. Mario. “My name.” Mario looked up from his daze with a frantic desperation. “He was trying to… oh Luigi…” As the world came back into view, Mario saw that there were toad guards scattered about, working on the wrecked airship to unload its artillery and ensure that the fire was fully put out. A few of them startled when Mario moved, most of them giving sympathetic glances before returning to work, but the only truly familiar face to be seen anywhere was Toad. He was holding out his umbrella, dedicating its entirety to shielding Mario from the steadily increasing downpour, paying no mind to how soaked his own clothes were becoming with every passing second. When Toad saw Mario finally recover his senses he couldn’t help but smile with relief as he stepped a little closer.

“Hey! You' okay?” “Luigi.” Mario gasped like he was coming up for air, “Where’s Luigi?” “Don’t worry, he’s safe. The Princess is with him. He’s going to– well, he’s probably at a hospital by now. We can–” He hadn’t even finished his sentence before Mario bolted toward town. Toad tried to fold his umbrella and put it away, but finding he didn’t quite have the time he simply tossed it aside before chasing after his friend, struggling to keep up with the plumber through the heavy rain.

[seren-dipitous-art]

I’ve been obsessed with the Olympics for the past week, and obsessed with Dick Grayson for longer, so here’s the crossover we all deserve.

Plus, gorgeous sweaty acrobat in gymnastics poses? Only positives.

[raointean]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

Of the 19 hijackers who carried out the Sept 11 attacks:

15 were from Saudi Arabia (a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

2 were from the United Arab Emirates (also a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

1 was from Egypt, 1 from Lebanon.

None of the hijackers were from Iraq.

None of the Sept 11 hijackers were Iraqi.

None of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq.

[gideonisms]

I LOVE being alive so I can be mediocre at SO many different hobbies

[gingermintpepper]

I think, perhaps one of the funniest things to come from EPIC popularising the Odyssey is that now a ton of people think Poseidon wanted to kill Odysseus.

In the Odyssey, Poseidon has no intention of killing Odysseus. In fact, part of the whole reason Zeus lets Poseidon do whatever he wants even though he thinks Odysseus is rad and should get to kiss his wife is explicitly because Poseidon had no intentions of killing Odysseus. Poseidon wanted to pay back the suffering/inconvenience blinding Polyphemus would have caused. It's a really abstract thing tbh. How do you pay back someone permanently disabling your son? Poseidon's solution was just to amputate Odysseus from his other half; i.e. Penelope. The end game was never murder, it was always an endurance race.

(Od. Book 1: Zeus reassuring Athena that he is not, in fact, a part of Odysseus Hater-Nation. Trans. Robert Fagles)

Also, for those wondering if there's any sort of in text reason for why Poseidon wasn't around in God Games - at the time in the Odyssey when Athena petitions Zeus to let Odysseus leave Calypso's island, Poseidon was -checks notes- on vacation in Ethiopia. Yep. He left to Ethiopia for a festival and thusly was very much absent for Athena's whole "please let Ody go? Please? 🥺" request.

(Od. Book 1: While Odysseus was suffering, Poseidon went to party in the east)

I am begging y'all to read the Odyssey. It's a comedy for everyone except Odysseus and Penelope who are, in fact, suffering 24/7 365.

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF movie Vanessa definitely thought Abby died..

[drulalovescas]

Castiel went from "You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of Hell. I can throw you back in" to wearing a $1 cowboy hat and watching movies about guns and tuberculosis because that made his man happy and I have no choice but to stan

[moncuries]

clearly my idea of these two just revolves around longing and diplomacy

[frownyalfred]

“Jason wouldn’t want you to do this, Bruce,” Clark says, trying to stop Bruce from doing something Jason would very much want him to do (kill the Joker, barehanded and slowly).

[selfship-quotes]

I love it when characters are like "what have you done to me?" when they're in love

[pianokantzart]

A favorite trope: wholesome little flashbacks that definitely don't make the current situation hurt any worse.

[ohbother2]

do you know what?

I miss long seasons.

I miss seasons that had 20 episodes and half of them could be cut and nothing would be lost to the story.

I miss the episodes where nothing fucking happens but you get to see the main cast goofing around with one another. You get to see their interactions, their relationships develop, their day-to-day lives and how they all fit together in them.

You get the Christmas/halloween/valentine's special -is it needed? certainly not. but is it good? is it entertaining? does it give the show and characters life? do we, the viewers, enjoy it? YES!

give me long stories!! give me little quarrelling spats between characters that can be resolved in one episode with no need to have an impact on the greater story! make these stories real!

let me enjoy them before they end!!!

I absolutely love Hazbin Hotel and the little world that's been created, but I can't help but feel disappointed we're only getting two seasons of 8 episodes.

back in the early 2000's 16 episodes would have been ONE season, never mind the entire thing.

show my angel dust and husk and nifty and sir penthouse living their daily lives in the hotel! show me Charlie brainstorming ways to redeem sinners! give me Charlie forcing the hotel staff to do cringe-y exercises! give me an entire episode of Vox trying to follow alastor through security cameras! Give me husks typical day! Give me a special through the eyes of nifty on a mission to irradiate the hotel of bugs! Give me sir penthouse and the egg boys up to no good!

give me something other than the bare necessities to make the story flow

6 months have nearly gone by in the hotel, and it feels like 1 month.

[camembri]

you wanted zoro to be on whole cake island to fulfil your weird desire to see zoro punish sanji. I wanted zoro on whole cake island because I think he's stupid enough to right place wrong time the plan and accidentally marry Sanji in full view of the whole wedding party in what becomes the most elaborately constructed comedy of errors ever written. we are NOT the same.

[thefantastician]

Legends Arceus comics

[inkskinned]

the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.

capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.

now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.

and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.

and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.

and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".

it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"