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whateverisbeautiful · 11 days

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♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#55: The Future Generations (1.06)

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

The CRM was so convinced that they were creating a better world for future generations but they failed to see how they’re actually destroying and traumatizing the youth and those that survive their horrible attacks. But fortunately, Rick and Michonne see right through them. 👌🏽 And what I see within these next scenes is the most gorgeous shot of Richonne of all time 🤩...

Beale and Rick continue their meeting and Beale reveals that, similar to Okafor, he also sacrificed people he cared about, his home, and the whole city of Pittsburg for the “greater good” of saving Philadelphia.

Then Beale says, “It’s not exactly tearing into a person with your canines, but it’s not nothing. isn’t that right?” Why do I have a feeling that of all the soldiers he’s asked that same question of what’s the worst thing you’ve done, Rick gave Beale the craziest answer he’s ever heard lol? 🤭

Rick replies, “No it’s not nothing, sir...My dad taught me, for better or worse…some things have to burn to bring things back.” And Beale agrees with that line of thinking, saying, “It was that. The sword that kills is the sword that brings life. I killed my past and a whole city so another could live.”

Whenever I hear Beale talk about the sword bringing life I always think Rick would agree with him it’s just Beale’s talking about the wrong sword.

Also, it’s interesting hearing Beale say he killed his past because the CRM nearly killed Rick’s past too by taking away the images of his loved ones from his mind. But fortunately, the sword-wielding woman who gives Rick life helped restore what the CRM tried to take from him. 😇

Beale tells Rick the first secret which is that the most likely outcome is they’re all gonna die. And then we see Michonne enter an auditorium where a projector shows a bunch of photos of little kids as a robotic-sounding soldier goes over the Child Evacuation Protocol of their horrific Operation N1W.

Then y’all, we’re hit with a stunning shot of Rick and Michonne in that candlelit bed scene, and the lighting and framing of it all is perfect. 🙌🏽

And of course, now that Michonne is no longer facing away from Rick they’re back up on each other as expected. 😊 Michonne looks up at Rick with her ring-clad hand on his face as she says, “So, we’re born this way.” And the eye contact. 🫠 My goodness, they invented chemistry. 💯

They cut to several more clips of Richonne kicking butt in TWD that just further hammers home that they’re cut from the same cloth. And then Rick smiles down at Michonne and says, “I guess so.”

I love that Rick and Michonne found someone who matches their crazy and their fighting spirit so much to where they can both just know 'we were born like this and that’s okay.' In fact, being a bit certifiably crazy is part of why they’re still here. 👌🏽 And they're crazy about each other which is part of what makes this story about 'crazy love' so golden.

Back in the echelon briefing, Rick learns that according to Beale humans only have 14 years left before extinction and that’s why the CRM does what it does.

Rick inquires about what they do and Beale says, “We’re trying to beat the odds, Grimes.” Then they cut to more TWD clips of Rick and Michonne, and I like how intercutting between Rick and Michonne clips really makes it feel like these two are one being. The baddest being. 😌

Michonne is appalled by what she is learning in the auditorium and Rick is appalled by what he’s learning in the briefing as Beale finally shares what the CRM is really up to. Beale says that they destroy other communities for resources, strategic superiority, and the CRM's favorite line “to ensure the city’s secrecy and security above all.”

I like the parallel clips they use of Rick looking up at a helicopter in TWD season 8 and in TOWL ep 1, as he learns that these helicopters he saw were likely heading out to cause some serious destruction.

Michonne sits in the auditorium as it's revealed that the CRM intends to evacuate 10% of the children before the area is gassed and its population is liquidated. And you already know none of this is happening on Mama Michonne’s watch. She’s going to fight for these kids and her kids because clearly, this 'last light of the world' doesn’t care who they hurt.

gif cred: @nerd4music

And I know after having been gassed herself, Michonne is especially horrified that they intend to do it again to tons of innocent people.

Meanwhile, Beale tells Rick they have spies throughout the world to monitor and potentially sabotage others. Jadis must have been trying to win Spy of the Month, the way she stayed sabotaging Richonne and team family back in the day. 😒

Beale says the CRM was behind destroying Omaha and in 18 hours they’ll destroy Portland to become the supreme force on the continent.

And then we’re blessed with another great shot of Rick and Michonne in bed as Rick says they’ll tell the Civic Republic the truth about what the CRM does, like the bombing.

Rick says “if they won’t who will?” as Michonne intently says, “No one” and I admit I’m not the craziest about this dialogue but what it lacks in subtlety it more than makes up for with the stunning visual.

Because then Rick notes that they don’t leave people behind and Michonne affirms that this is what they do and y’all the visual of her sliding her ring-clad hand in his hair as they look at each other…Put it in the Louvre. 🤩🖼

This gorgeous visual right here is truly my favorite Richonne visual of all time. 👏🏽 These two are some serious stunners and this shot is a mesmerizing work of art. 😍🔥

gif cred: @lousolversons

Beale continues to give Rick the 411 on what they’re about to do and he’s so emotionally removed from the fact that he’s talking about wiping out a whole city of people. That alone lets you know his brand of crazy is a major problem and Rick can sense that too as he starts to reach for his knife.

Beale also says they’ll continue to take the resources of even more communities they find, which means eventually they’ll end up on ASZ's doorstep.

As Beale says, “Maybe we get to survive'' there are quick clips shown from several surviving members of the TWD cast. Michonne then radios Rick in the auditorium while she listens to the soldiers talk in a cold and disconnected manner about the trauma they’re bound to put these kids through.

In the final bedroom scene, Rick continues to go over he and Michonne’s plan and he lets her know to key the walkie if anything changes and then he’ll get back to her when he can. Hearing that is always sweet to me because even with the stuff he has to take care of with the plan, he wants her to be assured he’ll get to her if she needs him.

gif cred: @nat111love

Looking like a beautiful mermaid, Michonne says, “if I can be gotten back to.” 🧜🏾‍♀️ And then Rick’s walkie goes off in the briefing. 😬

Beale notices and Rick is quick on his feet saying it was just Thorne. Back in the auditorium, Danai does a great job communicating Michonne’s horror even through a mask as the CRM soldier continues their cold and emotionally detached speech even calling the stuffed animals “comfort items” to “furnish” the children with.

As the projector lands on the final image of a young Black boy (which I like how Danai wanted that pic to be the final one to connect to Michonne’s kids RJ and Andre) we then get more TWD clips of the adorable Grimes kids. And I like how each clip feels like it embodies a different season - fall, winter, summer.

There’s Carl smiling on those train tracks. 😭 Judith smiling and hugging Michonne in the snow. 😭 And RJ’s adorable little smile at the beach. 😭 And then, having seen enough, Michonne makes her way out of the auditorium.

I feel like here is a good time to note something regarding the CRM too. I know some felt like the handling of the CRM was rushed in TOWL and wanted it to be explored more in the show, but I think the CRM/Civic Repiblic was actually intended to be more of an arena for a far more personal story being told in The Ones Who Live.

This show was more about Rick and Michonne navigating a journey to overcome a lot of internal imprisonment, and the CRM was always explored in relation to that more contained and personal story of these two characters finding themselves and each other again.

At least in TOWL (I can’t really speak on any other spinoff show in the twdu since I don't watch them) we’re always seeing the CRM through the lens of how it impacts Rick and Michonne specifically. The CRM makes Rick lose himself, they make Michonne nearly lose her life when they gas her and her friends, they almost cause a major wedge in Richonne’s relationship and nearly keep them from going home together.

The CRM had done a lot of damage throughout the miniseries so it’s not like their impact isn’t felt, it's just not necessarily dived into on a grander scale outside of Rick and Michonne because this is Rick and Michonne’s story.

gif cred: @nat111love

This miniseries was always meant to give Richonne closure, not launch the next ten years of the twdu. So for me personally, I was more than fine with Richonne getting substantially more focus than the CRM stuff.

Also, one of the main things to acknowledge about the CRM is that it makes everyone lose themselves. All these soldiers become faceless cogs in the machine, devoid of caring about anything other than the mission.

We see this with Pearl becoming a convert and becoming so obsessively mission-minded. That’s what the CRM does to its soldiers - strips them of what makes them human, so they can just obediently go along with these heinous acts for the so-called greater good. So in a sense, the way the CRM felt faceless and distant might’ve been the point. That’s what you have to be to belong to this military.

And lifeless and distant is what the CRM nearly made Rick. However, what we saw in TOWL's actual core plot is that Rick did devastatingly lose himself but he found himself again when his other half reentered his life.

In fact, Rick is fully cognizant of the fact that his beloved wife and son are why he didn’t succumb to losing himself and being in the same emotionally numb state that Beale, Okafor, Jadis, and Pearl ended up in.

And in his final confrontation with Beale, Rick makes it known the ones who truly give him something to live for. 😌👌🏽

#richonne #towl #reveling in richonne #1.06 #RIR (55)#the ones who live #twd towl #michonne grimes #rick grimes #rick x michonne #twol #michonne #rick and michonne #twd: the ones who live #twd #richonnefandom

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ohdearlingwhathappened · 9 months

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A Pair Made in the Pits chapter 2

Falling Behind Part 2

Chp 1, Chap 3

A/n: Here's Chapter 2 of this series. I have started my current semester, so chapters are going to be quite slow. Apologies in advance! This has primarily not been beta read, so let me know if you find any discrepancies. And most important, enjoy the chapter!

Having two robots kill them all by driving into the side of a cliff after quasi kidnapping them was not how Y/n thought this would go down, but with a shriek, she closed her eyes and silently asked any deity that may exist to please rain vengeance down on her kidnappers. That is, until she realized there were no sounds or feelings of the crash and the light beyond her eyelids dimmed from the harsh Nevada sun; opening her eyes, she realized that they somehow were now in a grey corridor that eventually lead to a rather large open room in which two more robots stood, probably having been alerted to their arrival considering their already apprehensive looks. At Bee’s stopping, the younger boy Y/n now knows as Raphael, or Raf as he prefers, gets out and she slowly follows him out and takes her place standing in front of the children. She knows, logically, that if anything were to happen, she likely wouldn’t be able to stop anything, but she might be able to buy them time, at the very least.

“I thought there were two.” The red and white robot questions the blue and pink bot. He was the first one Y/n had seen once they had entered the clearing, of sorts. He had been standing over by what looked to be a large computer, though she supposes it’s quite normal sized, or possibly even small, for them.

Ever snarky, the effeminate bot responds, “Haven’t you heard- humans multiply.” before walking more over towards the middle of the room.

Y/n snorts, unbelieving of the situation she and these kids are in, and looks around before hearing human-sized steps moving past her and toward the hulking figure of the green robot, “Miko! Don’t-”

“I’m Miko! Who are you?”

“Bulkhead?” The larger, green robot seemed tense, obviously not used to talking to many other humans, especially teenage girls, most likely. Oblivious to the apparent nerves, Miko gives an excited gasp and begins her questioning.

“Are you a car? I bet you’re a truck. A monster truck! Do you like heavy metal? How much do you weigh?! Have you ever used a wrecking ball for a punching bag?” The questions were an absolute onslaught that, despite not being the one having the questions shot at them, were making even Y/n’s head spin.

“Miko, hon, give um- Bulkhead- some space to breathe. Besides, I think there are more pressing matters at hand here.” Putting a hand on Miko’s shoulder, Y/n pulls the young girl away. Receding into her thoughts she tries to determine who exactly is in charge, so she can begin ripping into them, and no offense to any of the present company, but they don’t exactly seem like the leading type. “I’m sure one of these robots will have an explanation as to why we had to be dragged out to the middle of nowhere, instead of just letting us go back to our lives.”

“Puh-lease.” The red and white bot scoffs out, leading to Y/n glaring up at him.

This is the second time one of these indicated that they aren’t all that meets the eye, and the lack of explanation is beginning to make Y/n’s blood boil. However, before she is able to snap back some witty remark, heavy footsteps draw her attention back to another tunnel that weirdly appears to have an almost immediate dead end, but looks to have metal arches and wiring throughout the skeletal infrastructure, to see the largest one of these robots yet.

“We are autonomous robotic organisms from the planet Cybertron, also known as autobots.” His deep voice rumbles throughout the room, making Y/n feel as if she could feel the vibrations in her very bones. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices Jack take a few steps forward and doesn’t stop him. For some reason she can’t explain, the alien before her has eased some of her worries and fears, making her trust that the kids were in safe hands. Just by answering a question.

“Why are you here?”

“To protect your planet from the Decepticons. We came here after our home became inhabitable after years of civil war.”

“I take it those are the guys who attacked you and Rafael last night? My turn for a question- why are we here?” No matter how much some of the explanation put Y/n at ease, there was still a lot to go over, hence why she dons the defensive and accusatory tone and crosses her arms. “No offense, but your war has nothing to do with these children. Why bring them here and further risk their endangerment?”

“Ms. Y/n-” Miko tries to interrupt, but the woman is quick to give her a pointed look.

“No, Miko.” She looks back up to Optimus Prime, and keeps her pointed look on her face, “Don’t you think yesterday was stressful enough for these kids? They are teenagers- Raf is only 12! They should be worrying about their grades, what new video game is coming out, who their soulmate is and what their quote says- not some intergalactic war.” Y/n huffs, annoyed with the situation in front of her. She may not be these kids’ parent, but she does feel responsible for them. “If it was a few other adults or even just myself, that would be different. We’ve gotten our quotes,” her words begin to fade, and she hangs her head, “even if they might be fucked.”

Miko flinches at the misted mention of her teacher’s quote. Having been a host student partially under the care of Y/n for nearly a year now, knows of the woman’s quote circumstances. When the teen came to the states, she had been ecstatic to get away from her overly controlling parents, but she didn’t exactly trust anyone in Nevada either. In a way to get her to open up, Y/n sat her down in one of the offices of the school and played a sort of 20 questions with the girl, to help her loosen up. The questions could be as impersonal as what’s the best place to get food in Jasper, or as personal as questions regarding her quote.

“So I can ask anything?”

“Yep. Anything you want.”

“And you aren’t going to back out if I hit some sore spot?”

“I promise I won’t. You have my word, Miko.”

“Okaaaay. How old are you?”

“Oooo starting off on the hard-hitting questions, huh?” Y/n smiled and pretended to think about it, “I know I must sound ancient, but I’m 26 years old.”

“Meh, you aren’t as old as my parents, so you aren’t that old.” Miko leans back in her chair, thinking about what to ask.”What’s your relationship like with your mom and dad?

“Well… my mother died when I was 12. It was a car crash- she was a lovely woman, from what I can remember. My father, on the other hand, changed after her death, and once I got my quote, he kicked me out.” She shrugged, smiling faintly. It wasn’t a fond memory, but it was nearly 10 years ago, so the pain had faded, but some scars still remained- metaphorically and physically.

“Your quote is that bad? What is it?”

“I do not know.”

“Well, what language is it?”

“If I knew that, I would know what my quote says, wouldn’t I?”

“Can I see it?”

“No.” The smile evaporates from Y/n’s face, not a trace of it remaining.

“But you said-”

“I said I would answer your questions, Miko, and I have. This is the one limit I have, and I request that you respect that… Ok?” Miko’s eyes flicker between Y/n’s and nods. Noticing the tension, Y/n smiles gently and clears her throat, motioning for the girl to continue- “Now back to your questions- I can’t imagine you’ve gotten them all out.”

“I understand your worries… Ms. Y/n,-” The giant in front of her snaps her out of her reminiscing; it had only been a year and yet the girl had become a trusted and dear person, to Y/n. “-but Decepticon activity has spiked, and with some of their warfront having seen the human children, I fear they may not be safe. Our war has been ongoing for a long time, and while we have not seen nor heard of their leader, Megatron, if his return is as imminent as I believe it is, it would be best to keep the children, and you, in our care whenever we are able.” Optimus looks down at the woman before him, the worry obvious on her face, and kneels down to better look her in the eye. “I assure you. These children will be safer nowhere else.”

“You understand this is a lot to take in, right? I am going to have to not only have the burden of these kids’ safety on my shoulders, but I am going to have to lie to both pairs of Miko’s parents and if I see Jack or Rafael’s I’ll have to lie to them as well. If anything goes wrong, I will never be able to forgive myself.” Y/n’s arms wrap around herself, hands gripping onto the fabric of her blouse. She breaks eye contact with Optimus and looks Jack, Raf, and Miko over, trying to confirm what she was thinking.

The truth is, the woman had already made up her mind, but she was hoping for a slip up, a wrong comment, anything for her to be able to deny the mechanical giant before her. But looking into his eyes, there was nothing but determination and truth glowing from his steady gaze. She drops her shoulders and brings a hand to rub her face, regretting the action slightly when she feels some of her mascara come off in small grains- today had been long.

“I understand your concerns-”

Y/n lowers her hand and looks back at Optimus with determination of her own.

“But I believe you will keep them safe.”

The base is quiet until Miko lets out a cheer of excitement and throws her arms around Y/n’s neck, thanking her for choosing the right choice, before going back over to the boys and speaking rapid fire- likely about how cool this situation was and how much fun they were going to have.

Miko always had the ability to look at the brighter side of situations- apparently even when being taken under the supervision of giant, alien robots who call themselves Autobots. Raf, despite the little time she has spent with the young boy, Y/n can see that he is a more positive person, with a somewhat more logical spin on things. Finally, there was Jack Darby- a boy who she had seen throughout the halls of the high school and of which Y/n was able to make acquaintance with his mother- a nice woman, a little older than Y/n, who liked to drop off things like a lunch or Jack’s work uniform to the office whenever she got a moment away from the hospital; Jack was more of a mystery to the woman- only knowing he became embarrassed when his mother came to the school and that he was doing just fine in his academics.

“Optimus, with all due respect, the humans are in as much danger here as anywhere. They have no protective shell!” The grumpier mech of the bunch brings up his own counter argument, waving his hand to refer to the four humans before continuing, “If they get underfoot, they will go… squa-iish.”

“Hey!-”

“Then for the time being, Ratchet, we must watch where we step.” Optimus ends the argument before it can truly begin, cutting off Y/n and inadvertently telling the other bot that the humans will be staying for the foreseeable future.

But before anyone else can get another word in edgewise, a green light begins flashing while an alarm blares throughout the compound, making the bots turn to the giant computer screens and the humans stiffen.

“What’s that?” Jack calls out over the alarm, bringing Bee’s attention back to the group, the beeps and chirps from earlier is the only response he gives.

“Proximity sensor. Someone’s up top.” Raf pipes up from behind Y/n, making her quirk an eyebrow at the fact that he can understand the yellow bot, but it is quickly overshadowed by the fact that another human is aware of the Autobot’s existence.

“That would be Special Agent Fowler- he is our liaison to the outside world. As he tends to visit only when there are issues, it may be best if you do not meet him at this time.” Optimus turns back to the four smaller individual in the room, once he was aware of who was dropping in to visit, and at his explanation, Y/n reluctantly ushered the children to go hide around the corner of the platform, positive it would keep them out of sight, just as long as this Agent Fowler didn’t walk too far forward or do a survey of the base’s condition. As the leader of this group spoke to the agent, Y/n turned to the children and pinned them with narrowed eyes.

“While the boys are talking, I’m setting up ground rules,” Y/n whispers, her hands finding their place on her hips as she begins her little TED talk about spending time with giant robots. These children would listen to her whether they wanted to or not, “First of all, and quite possibly the most obvious- no talking about this with anyone, not your parents- host, biological, or otherwise; no one at school; work; band; clubs- nobody. Second, they are in a war- this is not an intergalactic daycare program- this is not fun, happy times-” As if on schedule, Bulkhead ripped a piece of equipment out of the electrical socket it was welded into and crushed it while speaking to Fowler, “-so treat it like the warzone that it is. Third, none of you are to go on any kind of mission. I don’t care if they need a human sized partner for some easy peasy scouting mission, if one of you are able to fit in a small area, or whatever the hell they do- they have the help of the government, so they can ask them for any help. The fourth, and hopefully the last rule, be careful and rely on me. Jack and Raf, I know you two don’t know me very well, but I promise you can come to me for anything.” She looks at Miko and grins, “You already come to me instead of your host parents- that still applies here. You kids are my responsibility and priority- if something happens at any point, you get the fuck out of danger. I don’t care what you lose- your phones, a school book- it doesn’t matter. Am I understood?”

All three of the kids nod, each murmuring some form of affirmation of hearing her.

“Great! Sounds like the agent has left, so let’s rejoin the lot of them and figure out where to go from here.” Y/n, dropping the serious- and downright intimidating- stance she held, smiles and walks around the corner not waiting for any more of a response from the three.

“What do you mean Cliffjumper’s life signal came back online?” Arcee, who had previously been leaning against the elevated platform that leads to the elevator which Agent Fowler had left through, straightens and approaches Ratchet and his computer systems. The kids, following Arcee’s interest, had made their way up onto a railing-lined platform to get a better look at the computer themselves, leaving Y/n at the base of the main structure’s stairs. “Is that possible?”

“It shouldn’t be. It’s probably this primitive earth tech that we’re stuck with.” Ratchet slams his fist against the base of the computer, hoping it would possibly make the computer

“If there’s any chance Cliff’s alive-” Arcee looks up to Optimus, hope for their previously thought-to-be dead comrade easily seen throughout her body.

“Ratchet, prepare the sick bay- we may need it.” The stoic bot nods to the others and they all begin to walk towards the stunted tunnel Optimus had come from earlier, leaving Y/n to wonder if there was some other sort of trap door like there had apparently been when she and the kids entered the base with Bumblebee and Arcee. Miko, as if already forgetting what she was just told, leans over the railing,

“What can we do?!” The girl was thrilled at the prospect of seeing some giant robot action, only to be brought quickly back to reality.

“Absolutely nothing! Did you not remember a single thing we just went over, young lady?!” Y/n snaps, making the girl visibly droop and glance at Optimus, hoping for another reaction.

“Miss Y/n is correct, you will stay here- with Ratchet.” His words ring with finality, making both Miko and Ratchet give a whine and groan respectively, and before anyone knows it, a portal appears composed of all sorts of shades of blues and greens. It would have been gorgeous, if it’s appearance wasn’t so sudden and startling. “Autobots, roll out!”

And just as fast as it appeared, almost as soon as the autobots disappeared into it, so did the swirling mass.

“What just happened?!” It was now Jack’s turn to nearly fall over the railing, leaning as far out as he could- as if he didn’t believe his eyes. To be fair, Y/n herself was still trying to believe hers.

“I transported them to the designated coordinates via the groundbridge.” Ratchet explained nonchalantly, as if whatever he just said was common knowledge.

“Oh, yes, because that explains everything.” Y/n grumbles to herself, tired of all the new information she’s been receiving today. She already had to deal with one attitudinal robot after dealing with attitudinal children and coworkers all day, she was not going to listen to another one for whatever condescending and blatantly bothered comments he may throw at her and the kids’ way.

As he gives the kids a rundown of the “groundbridge”, Y/n half listens as she looks around the base, trying to get some stable understanding of where she is; with everything changing and new information being thrown at her every five minutes, the need for something to be relatively unchanging was almost necessary, unless Y/n wanted to pass out from information overload.

The base itself is older- it had to have been abandoned by the government far before the Autobots arrived. And upon further inspection, there are three tunnels, not two. There’s the tunnel they arrived through, the stunted tunnel that holds the technology for the groundbridge, and then there’s the third tunnel that Y/n could only assume went further throughout the silo’s infrastructure. Walking towards the new area, she begins to wonder about the bots’ living quarters.

I wonder if they have their own rooms here. I can’t imagine them all spending every second of every day with each other- they’d go mad. I wonder if their suites would be suited to their vehicle forms… like a kind of habitat. Pfft they could call it a habsuite. Though, that sounds as if I’m likening them to animals so perhaps not. Having a short giggle to herself at the random word, Y/n’s thoughts are abruptly cut off by Optimus’ voice coming through the computer system ordering Ratchet to open the bridge-thing. Heading back over towards the ambulatory mech and the kids, she notices a lack of a new body among them.

“Cliffjumper?” Ratchet inquires, bringing everyone’s heads to hang, confirming the worst news- he was gone. The air is solemn, the loss of anyone- mechanized or organic- is always a hard blow to be dealt to one’s psyche, and Y/n’s heart goes out to them for the loss of their friend.

“What was that explosion?! Was there a fight?! Can I come with, next time?!” Miko once again taking her place at the railing, misses the que that now is not the time to be asking about their next adventure. Y/n knew the girl was just excited, but she was coming across as insensitive.

“Miko-”

“Hey hey, Miko, let’s go see what the bots hide in their sock drawers.” Thankfully, Jack had a better grasp on the situation and led Miko away so that what happened could be discussed, despite her aired grievances.

Optimus approached Arcee gently, it being obvious that she was the most shaken up over what had happened on the other side of that portal, “Arcee, what did you see?”

The bot in question wrapped her arms around herself. Any trace of the spunky bot who Y/n met earlier that day was gone, leaving behind a shaken, hurt woman who was still in shock after seeing her friend gone.

“Not Cliff. At least, not anymore. He was mutated. Butchered. Like… something from those con experiments during the war.” And before anyone could catch her, her knees hit the ground and her arms caught one of the cases to keep herself up. Bee whirred in what could easily be understood as concern for his friend, but she waved him off, “I’m fine… just dizzy.”

Ratchet, the obvious medic of the group, immediately begins running diagnostics and scans, finding what Y/n could only see a glimpse of some kind of purple goo.

“Cliff was covered in this stuff- leaking it.” Upon hearing this, Ratchet scrapes some off of her and tells her to take a decontamination bath at once. She nods and accepts Bee’s help to the makeshift shower.

“Optimus?” Jack calls the attention of the giant mech who leans down slightly and waves his phone a little, “I hate to bug but no bars?”

Not having even thought about the time, Y/n looks down at her own and startles at the time blinking back at her- 10:32. While it might not be a big deal for her, she can only imagine the panic the kids’ parents might be going through. Miko might have the excuse of going over certain study materials with Y/n, but the two boys had nothing to protect them from their parents’ wrath.

“I didn’t even think of curfew!” Y/n yelps. “Miko, I don’t normally encourage you to lie to your parents, but this is kind of a special case. Just let them know I was helping you with some of your studies and wanted to speak with you about possible extracurriculars. I’m sorry, boys, but I don’t know if I can help you come up with any excuses as to why you’ll be getting home so late. I suppose you can partially blame me, Jack. Your mother has my number, so she might call me, and I can cover for you.”

“Earth customs… I hadn’t considered.” Optimus hums stands upright. “The issue of your safety remains. Bulkhead, accompany Miko home and maintain covert surveillance in vehicle form.”

“Curbside duty, got it.” He nods in response to his orders.

“Bumblebee, watch over Raf. And Ratchet-”

The mech doesn’t even turn around, “Busy!”

“Arcee, you’ll accompany Jack.”

After a moment’s pause, she brings a hand to her forehead and heaves a sigh, “Oh, still dizzy.”

“You’re fine, says your physician.” Ratchet deadpans, foiling Arcee’s attempt to get out of babysitting, leading her to hunch her shoulders and groan.

“And I will join you to your home, Ms. Y/n.”

“Oh! Um alright.” A sort of awkward smile is shot up at him and with everyone’s positions set, the humans get situated in their guardians and they all ‘roll out’.

* * * * * *

The drive back to Y/n’s home was quiet. Staring out into the desert seemed to be the only option she could come to; today was… something. One second she’s hearing yet another rambling session from Mrs. Albert and now, she’s riding home in a sentient semi-truck that can transform into a metal man from outer space. A metal man who seems to have the worlds on his shoulders and on top of it all, he’s lost another soldier- another friend just hours ago. There is nothing Y/n could possibly say to begin expressing how sorry she is for his loss and for adding to his already-present, heavy workload. Not that she had the time- even though she could have sworn she had just been looking at the wide expanse of the desert, Optimus was rolling up to the front of her house.

After a moment of neither of them speaking, a sound that would normally be the noise of a semi stopping rings out, and the air coming from his vents could easily be understood as a kind of exhale in attempt to gain Y/n’s attention, “Ms. Y/n, we have arrived.”

“Just Y/n is fine. Unless you’d like me to start calling you Mr. Optimus or Mr. Prime.” The woman snorts and the seats vibrate slightly as a low chuckle runs through Optimus’ alt-mode.

“Understood.”

“...I-... I’m sorry. About your friend, I mean.” Fiddling with the ends of her right-hand sleeve and noticing it had started to bunch up at some point in the day, she pulls it as far down as possible.

“Cliff Jumper was a brave soldier and good friend. I will see him and our other lost friends when I eventually rejoin the Allspark.”

“The Allspark?”

“A well of power and energon from which all life on Cybertron came from and will return to- until all are one…” There’s a wistfullness to the mech’s voice, as if there are more meanings to the what he’s just said, ones in which he yearns for. Jolting himself out of whatever thoughts were whipping around in his head, Optimus continues, “...but that is a story for another day. For now, you must recharge. I will see early tomorrow morning, Y/n.”

The door to Y/n’s right pops open, and she hops out- albeit a tad awkwardly- and looks back at the semi, “Thank you, Optimus. For promising me to keep us, but most importantly the children, safe. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Y/n.”

Stepping into her house and into her bedroom, she didn’t even get the chance to change out of her work clothes. Looking at the bed, she decided it would just be best to just pass out and deal with anything that needed to be done in the morning. Before long, her eyes were fluttering shut and sleep finally had her within its grasp. That is until one particular realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

Her car was still parked in the school’s parking lot.

What a day.

Taglist: @the-unhinged-raccoon, @hystericalanarchy

#fanfic writing #transformers #angst #tw angst #slow burn #tfp megatron x reader #megatron x reader #tfp megatron #transformers Prime #transformers x reader #soulmate au #afab reader #fem reader #part 2 #a pair made in the pits

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caligvlasaqvarivm · 4 months

Note

I know you've touched on it in your Gamzee Essay/general alternative timeline post but may I hear some more about your ideas regarding GamTav (or only Tavros)? You get these two in a way the broader fandom doesn't (which is fine, I'll still reblog even the most vanilla ooc art of them) so I'd really love hearing more of your thoughts:3

Ok, I think this is going to be someeewhat controversial, but I think they're destined for pale together, despite Gamzee's initial flushed flirting. I did in fact reread ALL of Tavros's logs for this.

I think the first thing we need to establish is that Tavros actually feels really shitty about himself. It's obvious that his problem is "self-esteem," since he's constantly prattling on about it, but there's a bit he says as Tavrossprite that's pretty enlightening as to where his actions stem from:

TAVROSPRITE: i SYMPATHIZE ENTIRELY WITH YOUR SOCIAL IMPASSE, cAUSING NOT GOOD REFLECTIONS ABOUT YOURSELF, tHAT MAYBE ALSO DOUBLE AS LIBERATING STUFF ABOUT YOU THAT YOU RANDOMLY DECIDE IS FINE SUDDENLY, TAVROSPRITE: oLD ACQUAINTANCES, aND GUYS YOU ONCE CALLED FRIENDS, TAVROSPRITE: tHOSE ARE VERY HARD, TAVROSPRITE: bECAUSE OVER TIME THEY GET EXPOSED TOO MUCH, tO ALL MY FLAWS AND INSECURITIES, TAVROSPRITE: aND THEY START LIKING ME LESS BECAUSE OF THAT, TAVROSPRITE: aT LEAST, tHAT'S HOW THE TRUTH FEELS, iN MY BRAIN, TAVROSPRITE: sO i START THINKING, mAYBE THEY CAN'T BE THAT IMPORTANT TO ME, aFTER ALL, iF i'M GOING TO WANT TO FEEL NOT SAD ABOUT MYSELF ALL THE TIME,

He has a mixture of self-loathing and social anxiety, the latter of which exacerbates the former, as his mind tells him that his friends secretly hate him. However, his real problem is what he then does with those feelings - he avoids them and the situations that cause them. This causes two major knock-on effects: the first is that he actively ends up distancing himself from people who ARE nice to him and DO care about him, only adventuring with Vriska because he's a pushover and she's very pushy (he adventures completely alone up until that point, and winds up sleeping almost all the time afterwards); the second being that, because he refuses to actually sit with and address his negative feelings about himself (or anything else), he's never able to fix them, or remove himself from shitty situations.

Something consistent with Tavros is that every time he tries to make a decision before his death and Vriska-prototyping, it's by trying to rely on something external - whether that's his imaginary friend, his robot legs, or the story of Pupa Pan... or relying on advice from Kanaya, or seeking approval and forgiveness from Vriska, or earning flushed interest from Jade. He believes himself to be deeply flawed and untrustworthy, so he allows other people to make his decisions, and when relationships do get intimate enough that someone might get him vulnerable, he peaces out. Even his ill-fated attempt to kill Vriska is heavily encouraged by Vriska herself:

AT: aND THAT BEING THE CASE, AT: eVEN THOUGH i'M TERRIFIED OF YOU, AT: aND nOT AS STRONG, AT: oR REAL CONFIDENT, AT: oNLY MOSTLY FAKE CONFIDENT, AG: Yeeeeeeees? AG: Go on. AT: i THINK, AT: i AM GOING TO HAVE TO STOP YOU, AG: Yeah! That's the spirit. AG: Pretty weakslime threat there, 8ut it's a start. AG: Tell you what. AG: If you can find me in this la8, you can have at me. AG: I'll even give you a free shot! No funny 8usiness or anything. AT: oK, AT: tHEN, AT: hERE i COME, AG: I'll 8e w8ing. <3

As we see with Jade, whom he's attempting to flirt with flushed, he's actively trying to impress her using "self-esteems" explicitly gained from "fake" things he's acknowledging as fake - that is, refusing to be genuine and vulnerable with her, because he doesn't believe anyone would like him the way he actually is.

AT: bUT WHAT ABOUT, AT: mY ATTRACTIVE BRAVADO, AT: aND IGNORING MY INSTINCTUAL COWARDICE HARD ENOUGH TO SAY THAT i LIKE YOU, AT: iSN'T THAT, AT: sUPPOSED TO BE VERY ATTRACTIVE, aND ENCOURAGE THE MAJOR HAVING OF FLUSHED FEELINGS IN OTHERS, AT: i GUESS WHAT i MEAN IS, wHAT ABOUT ALL MY CONFIDENCE, AT: wHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT,

His "dating" Vriska in the dream bubbles is also dubious and one-sided at best, as John calls him out for faking it and Tavros isn't willing to bring up wanting the Ring of Life because he was planning to propose to Vriska. Thus, once more, he's attempting to use something disingenuous (in this case, a human proposal) to win another person's affection, which he believes would be a symbol of actualizing his "self-esteem".

We also literally see him do the "deciding someone wasn't actually important to you after all, so it hurts less when you cut them off before they can hurt you emotionally by noticing your flaws" thing with Nepeta - he actually quite likes Nepeta, and would certainly have enjoyed having her play the game with him, but he assures her that it's not a big deal basically immediately, and insists he'll just find someone else:

AC: :33 < tavros im sorry i cant be on your team :(( AC: :33 < im not allowed AT: oH, AT: tHAT'S OKAY, AT: tHEN i GUESS HE SAID NO, tHEN, ... AC: :33 < hmm purrhaps AC: :33 < but i still f33l bad AT: i'LL FIND ANOTHER PLAYER, iT'S NOT A BIG DEAL, AT: gOOD LUCK, bEING, AT: oN THE BLUE TEAM, AC: :33 < ok thanks :((

But, perhaps most strikingly, is the way he leaves his good friend Gamzee on read after Gamzee suggests... gasp... intimacy.

TC: WhEn wE Up aNd sTaRt tO KiCk aT ThIs rEd TeAm NoIsE, TC: YoU ShOuLd mAkE YoUr wAy tO GeT YoUr hAnG On aT My hIvE. AT: oH, yES, tOTALLY, TC: We cOuLd sPlIt a tIn oF ThE PiMpEsT SnEeZe i gOt oN HaNd, BaKeD Up aLl sPeCiAl fOr yOu. TC: AnD ThEn mAyBe mAkE OuT A LiTtLe. AT: uH, TC: ;o) AT: , AT: ,,

It freaks him out, and he's never seen hanging with Gamzee again. And this is a huge shame, because not only is Tavros one of the only people who is nice to Gamzee and appreciates his religious beliefs, but Gamzee is one of the only people who hears out Tavros's genuine insecurities and desires without making fun of him:

AT: tHE ONLY THING MORE FLY THAN THE RHYMES, AT: i'M SAYING TO EXPRESS ALL MY MALICES, AT: iS THE ABILITY HE HAD i WISH WAS MINE, AT: iNSTEAD OF i GUESS, THIS EXCESSIVE PARALYSIS, TC: (lOoK OuT FoR ThE HoOk bRo!!!) TC: GeT OfFa tHoSe wHeElS, gEt oFfA ThOsE WhEeLs. TC: If mIrAcLeS ArEn't fAkE He'lL GeT OfFa tHoSe wHeElS! AT: bUT HIGH, iN THIS CASE, hAS DOUBLE THE MEANING, AT: iT MEANS HE CAN FLY, pLUS DOES HIGH SELF ESTEEMING, AT: tHAT'S TWO THINGS HE HAS, tHAT i'D RATHER WERE MINE, AT: hIS TWO FLAPPY WINGS, aND hIS BIG HEALTHY SPINE, AT: oOPS, AT: tHAT'S THREE THINGS,,, TC: GeT OfFa tHoSe wHeElS, gEt oFfA ThOsE WhEeLs. TC: If mIrAcLeS ArEn't fAkE He'lL GeT OfFa tHoSe wHeElS!

(Compare:)

PAT: i'M SORT OF, lYING ON vRISKA'S FLOOR RIGHT NOW, PAT: lIKE, iN HER BLOCK, PAT: lYING DOWN, PAT: uHH, yOU KNOW, bECAUSE i CAN'T WALK, CCG: OH NO SHIT REALLY??? CCG: YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS, WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN.

He isn't able to do a REAL self-confidence at least until he gives Vriska the bird and flies away, for the first time asserting that he thinks she's an asshole and doesn't actually want or need her validation or approval. After that, he's able to convince a ghost army to follow him using friendship and asking and niceness. Breath powers! Also Page powers! Also actual self-esteems! Although I don't personally hold anything after Game Over as anything more than soft canon, I think we can still see a fairly straightforward character arc reach a natural conclusion there.

But as to why I specifically think him and Gamzee are destined for pale, despite what appears to be flushed leanings from Gamzee's end, and despite the fact that I usually believe what the comic tells me, is because what brief few interactions we see between them are very much pale in nature, and it would be kind of narratively bizarre if Gamzee were set up to have a failed moirallegiance - the quadrant described as "soul mates" - without managing to find his real soul mate after. And who's it going to be? Equius? Or the guy that Gamzee literally says he feels "at chill with" talking to?

Gamzee kissing Tavros's corpse is often used as evidence for his desire for flushed, but I disagree - however Gamzee feels about Tavros romantically, kissing a dead player is how you revive them, so it reads to me - especially given how sad Gamzee is about Tavros dying - more like a desperate act to bring him back. Lest we forget, Terezi also gives it a try, and Karkat kisses Kanaya for the same reason - the reality that their extra lives are gone hasn't sunk in yet for these 13 year old kids, so they must try revival even if they know it won't work.

Moreover, Gamzee indirectly describes Tavros as his "best friend," after having called Karkat that through most of the game, and having an implied pale crush on Karkat during that time.

TC: YOU MOTHER FUCKING KNOW, BROTHER. TC: its the fuckin puppet. TC: THE ONE THAT'S ALL GOT TO BE MY BEST FUCKING FRIEND I GOT NOW. TC: now that my other buddy managed to be having his head chopped off. :oC

Moreover moreover, what Karkat cites as being the cause of their moirallegiance's failure is Gamzee's religious beliefs:

KARKAT: HE STARTED GETTING SO UNBELIEVABLY SELF SATISFIED AND PIOUS, LIKE WAY MORE THAN HE EVER WAS BEFORE. KARKAT: LIKE HE'S JUST SO COMPLETELY CONVINCED HE'S FOUND HIS CALLING, THAT THIS SESSION IS THE GATEWAY TO THE PROMISED LAND WHERE HE'LL FULFILL HIS DESTINY. KARKAT: HE'S SO CAUGHT UP IN HIS IDIOTIC SCHEMES HE COULDN'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ME ANYMORE.

Which are explicitly what Tavros invites Gamzee to speak on, and appreciates:

AT: yEAHHH, yOU CAN TALK ABOUT THE CLOWN THINGS, wHICH, AT: i DON'T REALLY UNDERSTAND EVER, bUT THAT'S OKAY, AT: bECAUSE IT'S KIND OF FUNNY, AT: wHEREAS, i'LL ADDRESS SOME TOPICS PERTAINING TO MY INTERESTS, AT: aND i GUESS, pERSONAL MOTIFS, TC: YeAh! FuCk YeAh, ThAt Be HoW sHiT's AlL uSuAlLy Up AnD fUcKiN lOcKeD bRo. ... AT: dO YOU HAVE TIME FOR, mY MIRACLES, rELIGIOUS FRIEND, }:) TC: Do yOu gEt yOuR NoTiCe oN Of tHe mIrAcLeS AT: sO MANY, uH, gRATUITOUS EXPLETIVE, mIRACLES, tHE MAGIC MOTHER, aLSO eXPLETIVE, mIRACLES, TC: FuCk yEs, HeReS WhErE ThE SlAm tUrNs tO NoThIn bUt hOnKs... TC: HoNk hOnK HoNk hOnK HoNk hOnK HoNk TC: HoNk hOnK HoNk hOnK HoNk hOnK HoNk AT: HONK, TC: FuUuUuUuUuUuUuUuUuCk! AT: iT'S LESS APPROPRIATE FOR ME TO DO THE HONKS, tHAN YOU, bUT THAT WAS STILL GREAT, TC: YeAh, BrO. yEaH!!! AT: tHE SLAMS WERE TRULY PRIME, aND, AT: yOUR RELIGIOUS VIEWS, tHOUGH i DON'T SHARE THEM, aRE, AT: rEASONABLY INSPIRATIONAL, AT: i THINK i'M IN THE PROCESS OF RELEASING AT LEAST ONE TEAR,

But also in Tavros's single conversation with Gamzee, we see Tavros stand up to a highblood:

TC: :o) HoNkHoNkHoNkHoNkHoNk AT: }:o), hEH, TC: hAhAh FuUuUuCk, YoU sToLe My FuCkIn NoSe BrO! TC: WhAt GoT yOu EvEn Up ThE gUmPtIoN tO aLl FuCkIn Do ThE sHiT lIkE tHaT? AT: eRR, i DON'T KNOW, iT'S JUST, AT: kIND OF THE OBVIOUS THING TO DO, AT: sTICK THE CIRCLE IN FRONT OF THE DOTS, aND, bEHIND THE BENDY ONE, AT: pLUS, oH YEAH, mY HORNS, TC: hAhAhAhA. AT: mAYBE WE CAN SLAM ABOUT IT, ... TC: fUuUuCk, So FuCkIn FrEsH. TC: YoU nEeD tO bE sLaPpEd FuCkIn SiLlY wItH a MoUtH lIkE tHaT! hAhA. AT: aND, iF YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH IT, AT: tHEN i SUGGEST YOU GO AND RAP IT DUDE,

He feels safe with Gamzee, enough to take a bit of an attitude with him, enough to open up about his insecurities about his disability and how much he wishes he was like Pupa Pan, and Gamzee explicitly states he feels calm when he talks to Tavros, which is the stated function of a moirallegiance.

TC: Me tOo, BrO, yOu mOtHeR FuCkIn kNoW ThErE Be sOmE Of mY EyE's RoYaL JeLlY To gO WiTh yOuR EmOtIoNaL pEaNuT BuTtEr. AT: wHOA, aHA, hA, TC: ThIs iS BeAuTiFuL, dUdE, i fEeL So aT ChIlL WiTh yOu. AT: yEAH, fRIENDLINESS WITH YOU IS, pRETTY MUCH ALWAYS NICE, aND FUN TO HAVE,

And the thing is, trolls are constantly getting into moirallegiances when they want to be flushed (Eridan, Kanaya), having palecrushes when they want to be friends (Gamzee), and winding up flushed with their moirail (pale solfef is forshadowed in the same breath as pale erikar, and they don't seem to confirm a matespritship until after Sollux's actual flushed crush, Aradia, explodes). Especially for Gamzee, who was neglected by his lusus and struggles with social interaction to the point where he feels like he has to hide his real self (casteist beliefs, constant talk of religion and murder, which, by the way, come out when he talks to Tavros), it'd be easy for him to mistake the "instinctive attraction" of moirallegiance for the passions of matespritship.

These thoughts are all pretty disorganized - I'm really sorry, it's super late/early for me and I'm exhausted for other reasons - but I hope that that . was what you wanted? hahah

#homestuck #gamzee makara #tavros nitram #gamtav

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themorningsunshine · 2 years

Text

Pretense

(Requested)

Masterlist

Pairing - Bucky Barnes x f!reader , platonic Avengers x reader

Summary - You have been with orverprotective parents your whole life, and it never bothered you as much. You know they mean well. Until they spew lies in front of your friends and ruin everything for you, including your chance at love.

Warnings - shitty parents, angst, fluff, misunderstandings, a lot of crying, slight language. not proofread

Word count - 7k (I need to be stopped)

a/n - This was requested by the lovely @caritobbg. I thought it would be a short one shot but it instead turned out to be the longest fic I have ever written. I tried to do the idea justice, hope you lile it, girl.

"Yeah, dad. I am at the tower."

"What do you mean why? I live AND work here."

"Yeah, I am taking care of myself, mom." "No, they don't fight each other all the time."

"No, Tony hasn't filled the tower with deadly robots." "No, Steve doesn't conduct history lessons here."

You sighed as your parents asked you for the 10th time this week if you were being kept hostage at the Avengers compound.

Your dad spoke from the other side of the phone. "You know we worry about you, princess. We just don't trust those superheroes."

You smiled a little at the nickname your dad had always called you since you were a little girl. "Yeah, dad, I understand that you worry about me but they are my friends and I trust them. I really wish you could trust them too."

Your parents had always been a little too protective of you. Being an only child, you were the object of their affection more often than not. It had never bothered you as much. You know they meant well.

But it had gotten much worse now. About a year ago, Tony Stark himself offered you a job to work with the avengers considering your skills and obviously, you said yes. It was an opportunity of a lifetime and you had found a family in the team too.

You hadn't told your parents about your new job for 6 months because you were afraid of their reaction. As you had anticipated, they didn't take their little girl working for superheroes very well.

Okay, that was an understatement. Your parents didn't trust the Avengers and they surely didn't trust them enough to be able to protect you. They took any chance they got to convince you to leave the job. All you wanted was for both of your families to get along. Maybe it was too much to ask for.

"Dad, we are friends. We look out for each other. We have each others' backs. Give them a chance, please. Why can't you try to trust them?"

"Hmm. Let me see. Your 'friends' consist of ex-assassins, a witch who used to work for Hydra, a "genius" and his scientist friend who created a robot that wanted to kill the whole of humanity. Oh, and the scientist also has huge anger issues. Like he literally turns into a monster when he is angry. Your best friend has killed more people than she can count. And this group of yours almost broke up once when the best friend of one killed the parents of another. Oh, and that soldier of yours has also reportedly killed a president. You are right. What's there to not trust?"

"Dad, he was brainwashed!!"

"Doesn't make him any less unstable."

You sighed. These arguments with your parents were a dead end. You knew you weren't going to get anywhere.

"Alright, mom, dad. I gotta go."

"Okay, sweetheart. Just take care of yourself. At least until we come to meet you next month."

You smiled at that. "Can't wait. I want to introduce you to everybody. Love you, guys. See you soon, Bye"

"We love you too, princess."

Your smile dropped as you hung up the phone and realization struck you. Your parents were going to visit and as much as you wanted them to meet everybody, you were scared. You could never be sure about how your parents would react. They were too unpredictable.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't hear footsteps approaching.

"You okay, doll?"

The voice startled you as you turned back to be met by the beautiful blue of Bucky's eyes. You kept a hand on your chest to calm your breathing. "God, you scared me, Buck."

Bucky just chuckled as he looked at you, eyes filled with concern. "Well, maybe you should be careful who sneaks up on you, doll. This is not really the safest place on Earth."

"The only person who sneaks up on me is you, Bucky." You replied with a smile of your own, as you felt your concerns slipping away.

"Exactly my point. I am not really the most trustworthy person either."

"Then why do I trust you with my life?" The words slipped before you could think about how they would sound. Your cheeks turn little red as you look down at your feet. "You are too good for your own good," Bucky replied with a slight blush of his own and he meant it with everything he had. You were too pure and too trusting for this world. He would never know how he got to even call you his friend.

His eyes squinted as he noticed something. "Doll, there's something in your hair."

Before you could react, he took a step towards you and with gentle hands removed a piece of confetti out of your hair.

You ran your hands through your hair before looking up to thank him when you realized how close the both of you were standing. You were pretty sure he could hear how fast your heart was beating.

The both of you stood there staring into each other's eyes until Bucky took a step back, red color creeping up to his cheeks. He rubbed his neck, flustered, before finally speaking, "Um, I should - I should go."

You nodded your head, trying desperately to get your heart to beat normally. "Yeah, yeah. I'll see you around."

As Bucky walked away, you couldn't wipe off the smile from your face when suddenly your conversation with your parents hit you again.

God, it was going to be a long month.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚

"And if you need anything, you can also ask Jarvis." You explained to your parents with the widest grin on your face.

"God, I can't believe you guys are finally here."

Your parents smiled at you before your mom engulfed you in a hug, 7th in the past 1 hour.

"Okay, guys. You know I love you both so much, but we are going to go in now and meet everybody. Can you please, please be nice?"

Your mom put her hand on her chest with a dramatic expression, "You don't trust us?"

You chuckled at how dramatic your mother could sometimes be. "I do, You know I do. But I also know as a matter of fact that both of you aren't very fond of my friends. And all I am asking is that you give them a chance. They are great people, mom. They are really really great and I care a lot about all of them. So, I just need you to be a little open-minded about them. That's all I am asking. Can you do that for me?" "Of course, we will, princess. We hate these inept superheroes but not as much as we love you."

Your parents then looked at each other a too long, which you didn't think much of, too excited at the prospect of your parents and friends getting along.

You took them inside the compound as they looked around in what you hoped was awe.

"Good morning, J.A.R.V.I.S" You greeted the AI just like you did every day.

"Good morning, Ms l/n"

Your parents looked around in shock trying to figure out where that voice came from when you chuckled. "Mom, dad, I told you, you need anything, just ask J.A.R.V.I.S"

Your dad narrowed his eyes at you. "Where is this JARVIS of yours?"

You giggled before replying, "Everywhere and nowhere." Troubling your parents never got old.

"Stop putting forward riddles, we are not in a fantasy adventure movie." Your mom complained.

"Sorry. Sorry Mom, dad, meet J.A.R.V.I.S. He is an AI that operates the whole tower, literally. If you want to know anything, just ask him. Tony created him. That man is such a genius."

Your dad almost rolled his eyes. "Why couldn't he just hire a human to work for him, just like normal people do?"

You sighed, just hoping that the day goes smoothly.

You couldn't be more wrong.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

"And this room is the briefing room." You opened the door to let your parents in but they just looked around from the doorway.

You had just started showing your parents around the compound, readying yourself for the inevitable. The whole team was pretty excited about meeting your parents and you knew sooner than later that someone will run into you.

The inevitable happened as soon as you stepped into the dining room.

Tony was standing there, getting his morning cup of coffee and his face told you he hadn't slept very well last night. Ever since he picked up the mission to update the compound's security system last month, he had hardly been sleeping. You were worried about him.

"Tony?" You said in a soft voice so as to not startle him.

"Oh, hey, kiddo. Awake a little too early today?" He said with a tired smile on his face, taking a jab at the fact that you were definitely not a morning person.

"Are you okay, Tony?"

"Hmm, yeah. Totally." He then looked at your parents who were standing beside you with a scowl on their faces. "Won't you introduce us?"

"Oh, right." A wide grin spread on your face as you turned towards your parents. "Mom, dad. This is Tony. Kind of the co-leader of the group. Tony, these are my parents."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr and Mrs l/n. You have a great daughter."

Your cheeks turned red until your parents began speaking.

"So, he is the guy who has his head so up his arse that he doesn't care about anyone besides himself?" Your dad with a scowl on his face.

You gasped as Tony's eyes widened. "Dad, what are you talking about?"

"He is Stark, right? That's what you said about him after the first day you worked here."

Your eyes widened as your mouth fell open. What was happening? You hadn't even told your parents about your job for the first 6 months. Why were they -

Your eyes frantically searched for Tony's and you felt a slight pain in your chest when you saw how hard he was trying to feign the hurt in his eyes. You needed to set this right. "Tony - "

"Oh, and could you please stop annoying our daughter with all the science and tech talk? That stuff bores the shit out of her." Your mother interrupted you before you could even say anything.

You looked at Tony, desperately trying to explain to him that it wasn't true. You had told your parents how much you loved listening to Tony rambling about his latest creation. You loved how passionate he was about his work. You couldn't imagine your parents using that against you like this.

Before you could say something, Tony spoke, "Oh, I am sorry, I didn't know me talking about what essentially pays your salary irritated you so much." He said with a snarl in his voice that he had never used with you before. Even though the both of you weren't that apart in age, he was like a dad to you and you would never hurt him.

"Tony, it's not what you think." You said, desperately asking him to give you a chance to explain yourself when some more people walked through the door.

You watched as Nat and Wanda entered the kitchen, engrossed in their talk, smiling when they see you.

"Heya, girl"

You internally panic. You didn't know what your parents were up to but this couldn't be nice. You just wanted to take them away from here.

Tony speaks up before you can do anything, "Her parents are here. And they have something very interesting to say. Turns out our goody two shoes has some very different thoughts about us."

"Tony, no. It's not like that. I don't know why - "

"Hey, let me guess who are these two." Your mother exclaimed, conveniently shutting you up.

Wanda looked between you and Tony in confusion before smiling at your parents. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. Y/n talks a lot about you."

Your mom looked her up and down before saying with disdain in her voice, "Redhead. A pretty face. You must be the witch."

Wanda's smile wavered but she didn't let her discomfort show.

"You're the one who is so desperate for love that she is dating a toaster."

Wanda gasped as her smile fell. She looked at you, confused and hurt.

"Mom, what are you - "

"That's what you told us, princess. That she is dating a toaster. What's its name again? Vi - Vis.." "Vision. His name is Vision and he is NOT a toaster." Wanda then looked dead into your eyes. "But it's good to know that that's what you think, y/n."

You shook your head frantically. "No, no, Wan. It's not like that. You know that's not true. I would never say that."

Wanda's eyes didn't waver and dread filled you. Your friends were not trusting you.

"What does she say about me?" Nat spoke up. She asked as if she couldn't care less but being her best friend for almost a year now, you could read it in her eyes that she was almost as afraid of the answer as you were.

"You're the black widow, right?" Your father questioned.

Your mother spoke up without waiting for a reply, "You are the useless one. No, like, really, the three of us always wonder, why are you even a part of the group? There are supersoldiers in here, witches and literal gods, what do you do? Throw some punches? Kicks?"

"Gods. That reminds me, where are the self-proclaimed gods/aliens of yours?" Your dad snickered, amused.

"Which one?" Your mom questioned in reply. "The doofus or the monster which can never be trusted?"

You had had enough. You exclaimed, "Okay, guys. Enough. Stop talking."

Your dad smirked. The audacity. "Come on, princess. Aren't you tired of pretending? Don't you want your friends to know what you actually think about them?"

You opened your mouth to tell them that whatever they were saying was as far from the truth as it could get when everybody in the kitchen heard footsteps approaching.

You heard Steve before you saw him, "Who thinks about what?" He asked, genuinely curious.

Your heart started beating frantically when you realized he wasn't alone. Sam and Bucky had entered the kitchen with him. But unlike the other times, your heart was beating with fear. This couldn't be happening. No, no.

"Y/n's parents are here. They were telling us all the great stuff she says about us to them." Wanda said with pure disgust in her voice. You had never seen her this mad.

"Guys, trust me. It's not - " "Come on, y/n. Let them speak." Sam said before turning towards your parents. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr and Mrs l/n."

Your father rolled his eyes before saying, "You're the one who got kicked out of the Air Force and then kissed Captain America's arse for a job."

Sam's jaw dropped but before he could say anything your mom replied, "No, honey. Y/n told us it was that Ant-man."

Your dad shook his head. "No, no. Antman is the one who went to jail. He is Falcon."

You were seeing red now. You knew that your parents were a little too overprotective of you and hence didn't like you taking this job. But you thought meeting your friends and realizing how caring and nice everybody was would change their minds. You never thought that they would ever do this to you.

You desperately wanted to explain yourself. To tell your friends that this was all a lie but you couldn't. You could see it in their eyes that they already hated you. And with your parents standing right there, you knew it would be impossible to give them. Maybe you could talk to them after your parents left. You just hoped they would give you a chance to explain yourself.

When your dad's eyes landed on Bucky, panic swelled inside you. Nononono.

"Oh, and you must be the winter soldier. That metal arm makes it pretty obvious though." Your dad said as he pointed towards Bucky's left side with pure disgust in his eyes as if it was the most horrifying thing he had ever seen.

Tears welled in your eyes as you saw how Bucky pulled his sleeves to cover more of his arm and blocked it from view.

"Do you have any idea how difficult you make it for people to work in this compound? Y/n complains to us how she has to walk on eggshells around you, scared that anytime you would get back to being the assassin that you have always been." Your mother uttered the words with a permanent frown on her face.

"But can you blame her though? You can not just kill hundreds of people and live freely, pretending to be a hero."

"Enough." You shouted. You couldn't take it anymore and your parents had gone too far.

You looked at Bucky, about to explain to him that none of it was true. That you were never scared of him. Not even for a second. Because you loved him. Since the day you had met him, your heart had held nothing but love for him.

But the look that you saw in his eyes made you stop in your tracks. He wasn't looking at you with hate or anger. No, it was much worse. He looked hurt. As if someone had pulled his heart out of his chest and stomped on it. You couldn't help but notice that his eyes held a little bit of understanding too as if he didn't blame you for thinking that way.

Your chest hurt and you wanted nothing more than to reach out to him.

"Wow. That - that was." Steve broke the silence, but it was the first time you had seen him out of words. "Is that really what you think about us, y/n?"

"No, no, Steve, None of it is true."

"Come on, princess. You don't have to put up a facade anymore. No more pretense."

"Stop it." You shouted at your parents. This was the first time you had ever raised your voice at them, but you couldn't care less. They were ruining everything.

"Guys, you need to trust me. Please." You looked at everybody, begging them with your eyes and words to just trust you.

"I don't understand. Why did you pretend to be our friend for so long? Why pretend to care when that's what you really think?" Wanda spoke, bewildered.

"No, no. That's not - " You spoke, tears at the brim of your eyes. This couldn't be happening.

"For the money, of course. Come on, why would someone live in the most dangerous place on earth if not for a buttload of money?" Your dad said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No, no, no, please. You guys have to trust me, please." You looked around at everybody, frantically searching for even a hint that everything was not ever. That they could trust you. But all you got was hurt faces and built-up walls.

"Why are you doing this to me?" You shout at your parents. You were extremely close to sliding on the floor and crying your heart out.

"We are trying to help you, princess. We are freeing you." Your mom said with a smug expression.

"You don't have to do that anymore," Tony spoke and all the eyes in the room looked at him. Hope swelled in your chest.

"You don't have to stay here and pretend to like us. I really really want to fire you but you know too much and your statistical skills are too good to be wasted. So, you will be transferred. Somewhere far from us where we don't ever have to see your face." Tony spoke with a sense of finality in his voice and your heart broke into a hundred pieces.

You looked at your feet and swallowed the lump in your throat before looking at him and whispering, "You don't have to do that." You then turned and looked into the blues of Bucky's eyes which you were so familiar with and all you could do was whisper, "I am sorry."

You didn't wait for anybody's response before walking out and towards your room.

There was nothing that you could do anymore.

You were not going to take that transfer.

This job was never about money to you. You had found a family here, and you loved them with everything you had. But it still wasn't enough for them to trust you.

You cried and cried and cried till you had no more tears to let go before getting up and packing your bag.

You had to leave. You couldn't face them again.

There was only one thing left to do.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

The compound was silent.

It was as if nobody even lived here anymore.

Everybody sat at the dining table staring at the food in front of them, nobody taking a bite.

It was as if a part of them was missing. As if the one thread that had bound them together was somehow suddenly torn apart.

There was an unspoken agreement between them. Nobody would talk about what had happened earlier that day. The wound was too fresh to be confronted.

Nobody knew where you were right now. But everybody just assumed that you were in your room.

Steve was very close to barging into your room and bringing you to the dining table. He couldn't count the number of times he had told you that you shouldn't talk while eating and even after choking on your food twice, you hadn't listened to him and Steve was glad. There was nothing he wouldn't give right now to bring back the lively chatter that had always surrounded the dining table. But he had to remind himself that everything he had thought was a lie, a pretense.

Tony was angry. He was seething. He had cared for you like you were his own daughter and you had thrown all of that into a drain.

Wanda just wanted to know how you were so good at acting. How you could pretend to be her best friend when you hated her all along?

But Bucky just wanted to know one thing - why. He didn't blame you for thinking that way about him. You weren't the only one who did. But he wanted to know why you would pretend to be his friend, to care about him when you thought him to be a monster. Why did you comfort him after all those panic attacks and nightmares telling him it wasn't his fault when you blamed him for every single thing? Why had you let him fall in love with you if you couldn't even stand him? You had to know that it would leave him devastated. He didn't blame you for hating him, but how was he supposed to live without your light now? Especially when he knew it was never for him?

Nat couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't just let everyone swallow themselves in silence for a person who never even cared about them in the first place. She harshly got up before walking towards the living room for a bottle of wine.

She shook her head when the memories of all of you hanging out at the same place plagued her mind.

As she walked past the bookshelf, she noticed something which had never been there before.

She frowned as she walked towards it to realize that it was a pen drive. She slowly picked it up to find a note attached to it which just read, "Sorry".

She was so engrossed that she didn't hear footsteps approaching until a hand took the pen drive from her. She looked up to realize Tony was looking at the drive intently as if scanning it with his eyes.

"What's this?" He asked, confused.

"No idea. Found it on the bookshelf."

Tony read the note and recognized the handwriting almost instantly. "It's y/n's."

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

Everybody sat in the living room staring intently at the screen before them.

Tony had assembled everybody and they had all agreed to watch the pen drive once. Maybe it would answer their questions. Maybe it was just an old pen drive and had to do nothing with what had happened today but they had to know.

The system finally finished scanning the drive after what felt like a lifetime and your face flashed on the screen.

Your tears-stained cheeks and red, swollen eyes, told them that the video was indeed today's.

"Hey, guys." You sounded broken and defeated.

"I am not even sure that you are going to watch this." You let out a sad chuckle.

"But I just needed to say this 'cause it feels like if I don't, it will swallow me whole. And you guys deserve to know the truth, too."

"I just - I want you all to know that all that you heard today, none of it was true. Not even a single word of it. And I need you guys to know this." You looked directly into the camera as if begging them to trust you and nobody dared to move.

"I - I don't know why my parents did what they did. I have no idea. I can tell myself that they were trying to protect me, but who am I trying to convince? 'Cause, you don't protect someone by taking away the best thing that ever happened to them." You sniffled, rubbing your palms on your face to wipe off the tears.

"And that is what this team was for me. This job, this team, was the best thing that ever happened to me. And it was never because of the money or the luxuries of living in the tower, it was you guys. You were a family I found in a city I knew nothing about. And that was what mattered to me."

Tony wanted to shut the video off, to tell everybody that maybe you were lying here too, pretending, but he knew it wasn't true. Your eyes shone with guilt and desperation and eyes never lie.

The video continued. "And maybe you are not even watching this video. Maybe you will never know how I actually felt and will hate me forever, but if there is even a slight chance that you are watching this, and there is a small part of you that can trust me, I want you to know what I actually think about you.

Tony, you were like a dad to me. You always looked out for me and were so damn concerned about me the whole time and I can't thank you enough. Thank you for always looking out for me and I never for a second got annoyed by you talking about tech, you might not know this but your eyes shine brighter when you are talking about your creations and I would never get tired of that. The only complaint I had for you is that you need to take care of yourself more. Stop sleeping in your lab and eating shawarma all the time in the name of food, it's not healthy. Take care of yourself, Tony, 'cause there are some people who will always need you."

Tony looked away, blinking hard so as to not let the tears roll down his cheeks. All the times when you brought him food in his lab because he hadn't left his spot for hours and then you forced him to finish it all, you didn't do it as a pretense, you did it because you genuinely cared about him.

"Nat, you're the bravest and the most badass person I know. Don't tell anyone, but you are my favorite fighter. I admire you so damn much. Who cares that you can't lift things with your mind or fly? You can kick people's asses without blinking an eye. You inspire me so much."

"Wanda, you and Nat are my best friends and I am so proud of you. After everything you've lost, gathering the courage to love again is the most courageous thing I've ever seen. You and Vis make me believe in love. Hell, I even had a speech ready for your wedding as your bridesmaid." You had a small smile on your face as if remembering something, "Now that I am not going to be there anymore, Nat, I am going to ask you to give a great speech from my side too. I know you are not a very emotion-oriented person, but please try. 'Cause Wanda deserves nothing but the best."

Wanda sniffed audibly and Nat kept a hand on her shoulder.

"Thor, prince of Asgard, Son of Odin." You said in the voice that Thor had taught you to intimate a long time ago and chuckled. "I know you are the one who stole all my pop tarts." As Thor's eyes widened, the video continued, "Don't act surprised. Why do you think I never changed the place of keeping my pop tarts even after they went missing every single week? I am not upset, nope. I don't even like those that much. I just need you to know that I won't be there to keep those tarts there. Ask J.A.R.V.I.S., he knows where I brought them from. He will tell you."

"Sam." Sam looked up from his spot as he heard his name. "I am a little upset with you. You never let me use red wig." You pouted and Sam chuckled. "But you do know that you are the funniest, smartest, and one of the most deserving people to be on the team, right? Hell, bringing you to the team was the best decision Steve ever made."

You stopped for a moment looking down at your feet, when you breathed, "Bucky." Your voice was much softer now as if his name was a prayer.

Bucky looked up into the camera, his heart beating a mile per minute. If this was all a lie too, he didn't want to know what you had to say. Even if it was actually how you felt, he wasn't sure he was ready for what you were going to say.

"I - " You stopped and took a deep breath. You looked vulnerable as if you were apart to lay your soul bare in front of you. "Bucky, I just - Whatever you heard today, it is not true. None of it. Since the day I met you, I have never been scared of you. Not for a single second. You know I don't blame you for anything that Hydra did, you have to know. I don't think you were a monster. I think you are the sweetest, kindest and bravest person I know. I wasn't lying when I told you that I trusted you with my life. I trust you, I care about you, and I - "

Bucky's breath hitched in his throat as you suddenly stopped.

"Well, there is a major chance that you're not even watching this, so .. why not? It's not like I am ever going to get a chance to say it to you. So, here it is -

I love you, Bucky. I am in love with you. I have been for a very long time now. I could tell myself that it was just a small crush and it would go away sooner or later, but who am I kidding? I want to spend every single moment of my day with you. You're the first thought that comes to my mind when I wake up and my last memory before I fall asleep. When you are around, I can't stop looking at you and when you are not, all I want to do is look at you. I know that you might never feel this way about me, especially after today, but I just had to say it once."

You took a deep breath before speaking with finality in your voice, "I just hope that one day you guys will know that it wasn't a pretense. That this team was everything to me. I found a family, a place to call home, I found love. I hope that one day you will be able to forgive me."

The video stopped and everybody bowed their heads down while Bucky just stared at the screen desperately, as if you would walk out of it.

You loved him.

You wanted to be with him and god if that thought alone wasn't the best thing that had ever happened to him. He didn't think you could love him. He had accepted the fact that he was destined to love you from afar, a love that you would never know about.

But you felt the same. He didn't have to watch you fall in love with someone else and get your happily ever after, because you wanted that to be him.

You could be his happily ever after.

Before he could let himself be hopeful, realization struck him and left him breathless.

You had said that you would never get the chance to say it to him personally. The things that you had said, the finality in your voice, it had all sounded like a ... goodbye.

He stood up abruptly, only to realize that all the eyes were on him.

Some were filled with tears, others were trying really hard to keep their emotions in check. No, no, this couldn't be. How was he supposed to live without you now that he knew that you loved him too?

Without muttering a word to anybody, he rushed out of the room, through the corridor, and towards your room. You couldn't have gone yet. No, no, he would beg you to stay, get on his knees and ask you to forgive him.

He stood outside your door for a moment, taking a deep breath, mentally preparing himself.

He brought his hand to knock on your door, only to realize that it wasn't locked.

With bated breath, he pushed the door open.

It was vacant. Everything that you had put in to make it a home, was gone.

You were gone.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

The whole team stood in the living room, waiting.

Bucky walked in, his head shaking and arms trembling.

Nobody uttered a word as they waited for him to give words to the inevitable. He looked up, tears brimming his eyes as he whispered, "She is gone."

Everybody gasped as guilt filled them.

Only if they had trusted you.

"No, no. We cannot give up. We need to find her. I am going to find her. We cannot give up this easily." Bucky said, praying that he was right, that not everything was lost. There was still hope. There had to be.

"He is right. We can't just let her go." Wanda said, tears straining her cheeks. "There has to be a way." Sam agreed.

Tony suddenly lightened up as he took out his tablet. "We can track her. If she hasn't switched off her phone, we can find her exact location." He had enabled a tracking sensor in everyone's phone some time ago. He remembered the way you had pouted and teased him that it was an invasion of privacy, but had finally let him install it nonetheless.

He let out a sigh of relief when he realized he could still check the location of his phone. "She is heading towards the airport."

Dread filled everybody as Tony's words sank in. You were leaving. Forever.

"She is in a cab right now. I can figure out its number, but it might be too late."

"I have to go," Bucky exclaimed. "I am not going to let her go. No. I need to find her." He looked around, ready to fight anyone who came in his way.

But everybody just gave him a reassuring look as Steve whispered, "Go, get the girl, Buck."

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

You looked through the window as the city lights bristled by.

Your cheeks were still stained with tears as you left behind the place you had called home.

But there was no other option. Your parents had left you with no other choice.

It hurt that they had actually been successful in their mind games, but there was nothing you could do. Your parents had taken from you, the best part of your life.

You were going to miss the city, the team, and your friends, but there was one person you were going to miss the most.

Leaving him was like leaving a part of your behind and you knew that Bucky Barnes was always going to have a piece of your heart, even if he didn't know about it.

You swallowed the lump in your throat as the cab came to an abrupt, sudden stop.

The cab driver looked back at you before asking, "Ma'am, are you okay."

You nodded your head before asking, "Are you?" After he nodded, you continued, "What happened?" "A man just rushed his bike past us, way beyond the speeding limit, and then stopped it right before us, in the middle of the bridge."

You frowned as you looked in front of the cab.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you recognized the bike and the man getting down from it.

"Bucky." You breathed before opening the cab door, against the driver's protests, your legs on autopilot.

When your eyes met Bucky's, you could see him visibly relaxing with relief.

"Bucky, what are you - " You exclaimed against the sound of the wind.

He got down from his bike and started walking towards you quickly. "Doll, how could you?"

Your heart skipped a beat at the nickname before you lowered your head. Of course, he hated you after what had happened. He didn't trust you.

You looked up to realize that he was a couple of feet distance from you now. You opened your mouth, apologies about to come tumbling from your lips when you were cut off by him.

You gasped in shock as Bucky closed the little distance between the both of you, pressing his lips to yours, in a gentle, yet desperate kiss, as if he was drowning and only the feeling of your lips could bring him back to the shore.

When the surprise finally washed off, you brought your hands to his chest as his led down to your waist, and you kissed him back. You didn't understand what was happening. But if it was goodbye, you wanted it to last forever.

When the necessity to breathe arose, Bucky pulled back but stood close.

He leaned in and touched your forehead with his before closing his eyes.

You breathed him in. He smelled of fresh coffee and pine. He smelled like home.

"How could you leave me, doll? Without even saying anything. Not even a goodbye?" He tried to be upset with you. But who was he kidding? You could stab him through his chest and he would still thank you.

Tears brimmed your eyes as you took in a deep breath, you wanted to savor this moment. "Buck, I - I am sorry. Whatever my parents said today, it was a lie. A huge lie. I wanted to tell you, but - "

"It's okay, doll. I trust you. But, I - I need to ask you something." He took a deep breath, already dreading your answer to the question he was about to ask. "Did you mean it?"

"Of course, I didn't. None of it. I don't blame you for anything, Bucky. I am not scared of you. I have never been."

"That's not." Bucky closed his eyes shut, praying that he could word his feelings correctly. "We - we saw the video."

Your eyes widened as realization struck you. He knew.

You had stupidly confessed all your feelings on a video. What were you thinking? He would be so embarrassed right now but you couldn't back out now.

"Buck, I - I do love you. That is the truth. But you don't have to say anything. I understand if you don't - "

Before you could finish your sentence, Bucky brought his fingers under your chin to make you look up at him before leaning in to press his lips against yours once again.

Hope swelled in your chest as you brought your arms to encircle his neck and kissed him back.

He pulled away a little too quickly to look up at you with a small smile on his face. The look in his eyes made butterflies erupt in your tummy with a ferocity you had never felt before.

"I love you too, doll. I do. With everything that I have. I love you and I am so so sorry that I didn't give you a chance to explain. I am so sorry that I didn't trust you.

I never told you this because I - I am not good enough for you, doll. I don't deserve you."

You shook your head, about to correct him, when he continued, "And I think I still don't. Being with you puts you in so much danger too, maybe I shouldn't even be with you. But I am tired of pretending that I don't want to. I am tired of pretending like I don't want to spend every single moment for the rest of my life with you. So, if you'll allow me, doll, I'll spend the rest of my life, trying to be the man you can proudly call yours 'cause I love you so damn much."

Tears were now flowing down your cheeks for a completely different reason. You leaned in to kiss him again when the both of you were interrupted by the cab driver shouting from the cab, growing impatient, "Madam, do you want to go or not?"

Bucky looked at you with hopeful eyes and you turned back to yell to the driver, "Never"

947 notes · View notes

heckcareoxytwit · 4 months

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The battle rages on as the X-Men fighting the three Nimrods at different places - Sentinel City, New York and Washington DC. Wolverine, Nightcrawler, Cyclops, Colossus, Rogue, Gambit and Monet are fighting the main Nimrod in Sentinel City. Emma Frost and Synch are battling a Nimrod duplicate in New York. Whereas Polaris and Magneto are facing the Nimrod duplicate in Washington DC. Magik and Eden Fesi try to join into the fray but they get shot by Nimrod (I don't know which one though).

While they are fighting Nimrod, Cyclops and Nightcrawler are wandering around the burning Sentinel City. Nightcrawler confirms to Cyclops that he has destroyed the thrusters and Nimrod/Omega Sentinel won't be able to repair them before the orbit decays. Nightcrawler asks how they're going to kill something that exists in multiple places and Cyclops says they'll have to do it all at once. "Under that armor, it's just… electricity." Then, Kwannon telepathically chimes in saying Colossus got punched out into space and he's almost out of sight. Cyclops tells Nightcrawler to go and he teleports away to save Colossus. Cyclops then goes off to challenge Nimrod. In the control room, Omega Sentinel tries to regain control of the station when Rogue busts through the floor asking if Karima has lost every last shred of her humanity. Omega Sentinel says Xavier cut a deal that the X-Men would get to live on their little island but they're too dense and prideful so she'll have to kill them including Xavier who she'll kill last. Kwannon sneaks up behind and nails Omega Sentinel with a psychic knife, leaving the cyborg mumbling and crying in despair. Rogue is about to stomp her head in but Kwannon stops her, telling her that she fried the Sentinel mind and that Karima's human brain was drowning in regret and pain.

Rogue and Kwannon charge at Nimrod but the robot knocks them out with a blast. He punches the just arriving Colossus away and is about to stomp a knocked out Manifold and Magik but Nightcrawler gets to them first and Cyclops blasts Nimrod away from them. Just as Nimrod could kill more X-Men, the killer robot gets zapped by the timely arrival of Storm. With Storm's lightning zapping the main Nimrod, the Nimrod duplicates are affected too, giving the chance for the other mutants at New York and Washington DC to fight back. The main Nimrod is left to face Storm and Cyclops in Sentinel City when Monet and Omega Sentinel fly in. Omega Sentinel (now with regained humanity) begs at Nimrod to stand down but the killer robot refuses to listen. Cyclops and Storm work together to take down the main Nimrod by cracking the armor and frying the circuits. As the other Nimrod duplicates, they are also defeated by Synch, Polaris and Magneto at different places. As Storm watches as the main Nimrod melting away, Monet arrives with Omega Sentinel and Cyclops says Kwannon is showing him what's going on inside her brain. He tells Omega Sentinel to earn this second chance and she, crying, replies weakly, "Call me Karima." Once the battle is over, the X-Men leave the Sentinel City with Eden Fesi before it explodes.

Fall of the House of X #5, 2024

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myths-tournaments · 10 months

Text

Awful Characters Round 4 (2/4)

Propaganda under the cut!

BENNY

The first thing that happens in new vegas is that benny fucking shoots your character in the face, steals your shit and leaves you in an open grave. Benny is by all accounts a bastard. He kills you, steals from you, he killed his last boss, he is the single most duplicitous man around. His gang are all about honesty- except him. He's a lying, cheating bastard. The guys who helped him catch you? He skipped on paying them and left them to get shot to death. His new boss, mr.house? He stole his robot, broke it open, got someone to reprogram it and decided to use it to TAKE OVER THE WHOLE OF VEGAS. Benny literally kills people, lies to people, steals their shit and takes charge. That's all benny does. He gets fucking CRUCIFIED if you don't help him out just because so many people fucking hate him. And yet. And yet. Benny is the single most compelling character in the whole game to me. He's just a little guy! He's just there! You can get shot in the head and come back and he goes "what in the goddamn" and then if you try and flirt with him he's like "uhhh sure? Okay?" And leaves you a polite note in the morning. He's fancy. He wears a stupid suit. He has a tiny gun with shitty bullets. He's catholic. He talks like an old timey news presenter. Literally nobody else in the entire game does that. He's got an intelligence of 3. He's my funtime boy. My silly little man. He's so funny. The antagonist in this game is a guy dressed like a tablecloth who looks at all times like a confused dog who doesn't understand what a tv is. And like. He's compelling. He robs from you, shoots you, but…. he never seems to actually wish you harm. He kills and robs and lies but like. He apologises for doing it to you. When he sees you again he doesn't attack you, he's just… confused. He tries to defuse the situation. You can convince him to talk to you, alone, with no guards and it's not that hard. If you spare his life, he doesn't go after you, like. Even if you sleep with him he doesn't take advantage of that and kill you, even if you try to. He… he just leaves. He gives you an apology. If he gets kidnapped by Caesar He just… apologizes again. He tells you his whole plan to take over the city, too. He thinks he'll die, and he wants something of him to survive. He's happy that you made it. And if you let him free, he just… leaves. He knows he's beat, he doesn't want to cause any more trouble. He walks out and leaves. The NCR will kill you if you cross them. The legion will crucify you. House? He'll blow you the fuck up. But benny, the guy who lies and cheats and schemes, he's honest. He's polite. He's… harmless. You can kill him with a single shot if you want. And he can't kill you. He doesn't kill you the first time, and he'll never really hurt you again. Benny just wanted to win. When he knows he's beat he just leaves. No lingering, no harm, he's off, off into the desert heat, and never seen again. Isn't that just insane? like have you ever known an antagonist so polite? He just leaves!! He offers you a drink!! His plan is genuinely probably the best one for the people of new vegas!!! He's. Benny is Benny. Anyway if you want to see some REAL propaganda go to the blog letmebegaytodd and look in the #benny tag. You'll Understand < https://www.tumblr.com/letmebegaytodd/717051175751614464/in-another-life-i-wouldve-really-liked-just> <- look at this shit man

AZULA

Azula explicitly considers herself a monster. She says needlessly cruel things to her brother and friends. She kills the show's twelve-year-old protagonist and masterminds the idea of burning down the entire Earth Kingdom to force them to submit to Fire Nation rule. I have absolutely seen people get called abuse apologists for thinking she's a cool character. But she's also a (canonically) mentally ill fourteen-year-old who was raised by her father to see her ability to be weaponized as her only value. Her mother, arguably the only adult in her life who could have had a positive impact, had a strained relationship with her because she was more difficult than her brother, and then disappeared when she was nine. Her uncle, who was her brother's main healthy role model, took absolutely no interest in her. She watched her father belittle her brother for years and eventually throw him away when he failed to meet his expectations, so that was a threat she was always facing. She really had no chance. And she also has moments that suggest she wants some sort of meaningful connection with another person. She lets her brother take credit for killing the Avatar so he can come back from exile, even though it means she'll be bumped back in the order of succession and offers him advice that seems genuine. Her spiral into a mental breakdown starts when her friends betray her. She's just a much more interesting and multifaceted than a lot of the fandom gives her credit for.

#awful characters tournament #tournament poll #awful characters round 4 #fallout new vegas #benny gecko #benny fnv #avatar the last airbender #atla #azula

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admiral-mason · 22 days

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I'm bored, random crossover time again

Recently I have gotten into a little shooter game known as Ultrakill.

For those who don't know: Ultrakill is basically a shooter game that combines elements from Titanfall, Doom Eternal, Devil May Cry, etc. You play as V1, a literal blood-powered combat robot that descends into Hell (from Dante's Inferno) to get more blood. On the way, you fight demons, angels, and other machines.

So? With my blog basically sporadically alive, let me revive it with another nonsensical crossover!

Gender neutral reader

SPOILERS AHEAD!

How these two games crossed over:

So you own both a PC and a phone/tablet. You would mostly play Genshin Impact on your mobile device while you played Ultrakill on your PC.

You've managed to complete both games and right now you tried obtaining all the alternate 'slab' weapons in Ultrakill. You have one already, simply called the slab revolver by many. Your next weapon to obtain is the sawblade launcher, located in stage 4-4 Clair de Soleil.

So, you did so. Whiplashing the blue skull from the right room after you used the first jump pad, the door opened and you shot your railcannon into the water. However, when you did so, the game decided to crash on you.

"What the hell??" You said before grumbling a little and trying to boot the game back up to no avail. Closing out the game, you bothered to play a little Genshin. However, within a few seconds of booting up the game, you got shocked and blacked out.

How you got to Teyvat:

After waking up, you found yourself in a plains area... and then you saw an anemo slime.

"Hey, you. You're finally awake." A voice that sounded like Microsoft Sam said from behind you.

(V1's voice from this program)

Turning around, you were greeted by the blue camera head himself.

"What the frick V1 how are you here??"

"I don't fucking know, one moment I touched the sawblade launcher, and now I'm here in what appears to be Limbo but not fake with the human who basically assisted me in murdering all of hell for blood. By the way, you perform really great shotgun yeets!*"

"Uh, thanks." You awkwardly responded.

"Now where the fuck can I get some blood?"

In Mondstadt:

The two of you ended up wandering around V1 had managed to kill a few wild animals for blood with his revolver. It didn't take long for someone to hear the sounds and approach you two afterward.

"You two! Stop right there!" Amber heard the sounds of V1's revolver shots as she ran towards you two. If it weren't for you rapidly telling V1 to not shoot her, she'd likely be on the floor in a pool of her own blood.

"...Hi there." You awkwardly said before she ended up tackling you to the ground in a hug with V1 just looking at the sight.

After Amber took you two to Mondstadt, word spread quickly of the Divine One and their blue angel-looking machine. The two of you managed to receive free housing with the Knights of Favonius alongside a tour of the city.

V1 abused his superior mobility to cross the entire city from one side to the other in less than a minute. This astonished the local citizens at this strange individual's movement skills. And then he accidentally crashes into a random citizen's cart.

"WHEEEEEEEEEEE"

"V1 don't you're gonna-!"

V1 crashes into a cart full of cabbages, toppling it

"..."

Everyone's also confused at his ability to seemingly generate coins... before shooting at them with that curved thing he holds in his hands and then it kills stuff. (I presume that most Mondstatians have never seen guns, the closest they have seen is probably a bow,)

Then he somehow pulls a giant double-barreled minigun?? Then a tube that shoots rockets??

Expect Klee to be all over him.

"Well see, this rocket launcher used to be an industrial tool, until some-"

"HOW BIG OF A BOOM CAN IT MAKE?!"

"...Let me demonstrate!"

V1 activated the freeze mode on his Freezeframe Rocket Launcher and fired a few rockets at a group of wolves...

...Safe to say, those wolves and their surroundings got blown up to high hell.

When Jean found the destructive duo, V1 just took Klee into his arms and proceeded to abuse his mobility yet again.

"BOING! Catch me now, bozo!"

"Get back here you blue thing-"

"I am not a blue thing thank you- BOING!"

Looking past shenanigans, Albedo and Sucrose have taken an interest in V1's lethal arsenal that's even far superior to Fatui tech. Noelle might ask to train with the machine after some introductions.

In Liyue

After a few days of staying in Mondstadt, you kinda wanted to see Liyue so you told everyone else and asked V1 to accompany you. Upon arrival though, you found out that Liyue prepared a celebration for the two of you. Turns out news can leak out quickly to the world even if you've only interacted with a part of it.

V1 found Liyue significantly more fun to traverse and navigate around. From mountainous marvels to spacious streets, the nation provided him with no short of tricks to pull off.

Everyone interacted with V1 normally until he started using the Whiplash to grab items from various vendors merely flipping a few coins at them in return. This led to a scuffle with the Millelith and he ended up shocking everyone by knocking all of the soldiers out with a mere punch to their chest.

Thankfully you managed to calm him down.

When he saw the Jade Chamber, he made it a personal challenge to ascend without using the proper way. He unfortunately did so while Ningguang was pleasantly talking with you.

"This, your grace, is-" You could then faintly hear rocket sounds in the distance, with Ningguang following suit shortly after. You both turned in the direction of the sound to see V1 flying on a rocket with his Freezeframe Rocket Launcher yet again before he jumped off and landed right next to the two of you.

"Hi friend I'm back! Mechanic abuse is funny!"

Ningguang just blinked at the sight of the combat machine that somehow stood on a small flying object to get up here without proper authorization. "...Your grace what the heck did that thing just do??"

"I AM NOT A THING-"

Part 2?

*Shotgun yeets refer to projectile boosts.

#ultrakill #ultrakill v1 #genshin sagau #sagau #genshin impact #genshin x reader #crossover #sagau genshin #genshin impact x you

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cometsandstardust · 1 month

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I’m rewatching Agents of Shield and here is a (final) list of things I genuinely forgot happened:

(and also little things i enjoy)

season seven:

- deke printed out sheriff stars

- “i just can’t seem to hold down a husband as they all just turn up with broken ribs when they give me lip” - daisy

- coulson learned about the speakeasy in a first year history course at the academy

- the first thing may says after finding out she’s in 1931, was “i’m hungry”

- “i’m a doctor, not a dame” “i’m a biochemist not a bird” fucking icon jemma simmons

- deke tells freddy that he invented the walkie-talkie

- “agent may, if i may?” enoch is so funny

- …may says she doesn’t feel anything when she wakes up, even though her empathy-ability is already present (though no one knows it yet). she wakes up and feels nothing because the only other person there is enoch, who isn’t human, and therefore doesn’t feel anything, at least not the way we do

- she also talks in a very-enoch like connotation during these scenes (same sort of lilt in her voice)

- they brought koenig onboard the zephyr and he said “excuse me if i’m not impressed” and then immediately lost his shit. he also called enoch a robot, and enoch made a very “bitch, please” face

- freddy shot koenig in the shoulder

- enoch is shown to be working as a bartender at the end of s7ep2 for koenig

- the zephyr scared two teenagers half to death when they got to the fifties

- younger daisy (aka skye ig) believed that area 51 was controlled by shield and was proven right

- the first time may showed signs of her empathy besides the monotone killer mood was when trying to single out the chronicom starting up helius and she basically had a panic attack

- also the chronicom they’re chasing has a very dottie underwood like aesthetic (ofc i’m referencing agent carter when my boy sousa is back)

- overriding the system knocked out the two chronicoms and coulson.

- the camera zoomed in on coulson’s eye and showed a circuit flickering

- the reason s7ep4 is in black and white is because of a malfunction in the wires

- sousa was considered the first fallen soldier of shield

- sousa called howard a pompous ass (he’s right and he should say it)

- mack compared the effect of sousa’s death on shield to the effect of coulson’s to the avengers

- sousa stole a motorcycle from the zephyr

- deke said he wrote the song “don’t you (forget about me)”

- he also name drops daisy in his own lyrics

- coulson’s in a tv

- sybil’s “dumb bot” acts just like a dalek for a sec

- may and yoyo sparred to try and trigger yoyo’s powers into working again

- yo-yo got stuck on the quinjet at the beginning of each loop

- in several loops, mack gets blinded by a radiation flare

- deke gives the distance from the center of the time storm in kilometers, which i initially thought was strange cause y’know american, but then i realized that deke literally grew up in space and that fitz-simmons basically created all the tech/software on board so yeah metric system

- daisy proved to simmons that she was in a loop with the fake word: “phlebotinum”

- when trying to remove the implant, on the first two tries, a lethal gas filled the room killing simmons (and the second time, daisy)

- in one loop, sousa grabbed the machine to remove the implant from the drawer instead of daisy or simmons and started coughing up blood

- also he literally grabbed it so that if something went wrong daisy wouldn’t die and lose her memories of the time loop

- may initially didn’t want to tell kora about jiaying but then brought her to see her body

- kora tried to help her mother heal by giving her energy

- simmons started forgetting fitz after malick put her in the memory machine

#agents of shield #daisy johnson #phil coulson #melinda may #alphonso mackenzie #jemma simmons #leo fitz #yoyo rodriguez #deke shaw #daniel sousa

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sadhornydemons · 5 months

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Rapid-Spoiler-Season-Speculation: Mastermind/Sinmas

Mastermind:

After a bout of angst filled episodes, I'm theorizing that this one might be the nice change of pace: fun, filler episode/calm before the storm.

Not to mention, a nice mixup of two villain groups.

The Cherubs mention they are waiting for I.M.P. to return to Earth, but the D.H.O.R.K.S. seem to have a portal to get to them faster?

Robot? Robot with a skull chest emblem? Well, if they already have a Loona Fursuit, I guess they could just be into making freaky shit now. Could they send it through the portal? In which case,

There's a massive battle going on in the Lust ring.

Blitz is missing from these scenes until this one where he appears to be at the Pride ring.

Where the crystal portal is finally shown, see previous example:

D.H.O.R.K.S. appear defeated (but still alive? Well, it's not like IMP kills humans for a living..oh, wait) and Blitz is grabbing the card off their desk.

End of screen captures/speculation for this one, but I feel like events have to be running gradually in the background of the last few episodes for the doo doo to really hit the fan in the last:

Sinmas:

First, let's talk voice actors. Harvey Guillén came in fairly recently, but has been confirmed to voice Vassago. Now, they can always work around voice work to be added later, but I'm really leaning towards his character not appearing until this last episode.

Jason LaShea voices Andrealphus, assuming this shot is from the finale:

I think it's likely that Andrealphus, being a minor character, only appears in one or two episodes. With that in mind, let's assume the following scenes, which share the same background images, also take place in Sinmas:

We see at least one Sin, confirmed members of the Ars Goetia, and several sporting crowns. Aka the higher ups & royalty of Hell. And Stolas is missing. Oh, but Andrealphus states he will summon him.

(Off topic, but does anyone in hell know/care that Stolas's ex wife tried to have him killed? Paparazzi mobbed his hospital when he was hurt, but no one followed up on that news story?)

Likely the same scene, "You are a disgrace." Unknown character states. Whom? Ozzie? Stolas? The demon who took the last blueberry muffin from the snack table?

"Where is Stolas, anyway?" Well, this is the only image of him that appears to be from the finale:

1) Is that a blessed weapon sword?) 2) Is that a Gabriella hair stripe or an 'I was frozen today!' Anna-inspired white stripe?)

Which matches up with this:

And either Stolas left the refrigerator open for 4 solid episodes resulting in his mansion freezing over or his in-laws are relatives of Elsa's and favor home renovations.

Okay, buckle up sluts, MASSIVE SPECULATION TIME:

What would cause Stolas to move out?

Or rather, what would force Stolas to move out?

Andrealphus wants his money and property, Stella just wants him dead, but she has to follow her brother's wishes. Andrealphus tells her, "I say we bid our time. And wait for the chance to gain the upper hand."

And they might had had it all along.

You know, I wanted to say that Blitz fully and unprompted, spelled out, in detailed terms, how he was using Stolas's item to gain access to the mortal world immediately upon meeting Striker, but in watching it again:

Striker seemed to already know? So, either, Stella knew and told him or he did his research (if the IMP commercial from the pilot is still canon, they basically broadcasted it). But Blitz does go a step further and literally job interviews the guy, likely giving him even more info in the process.

Stolas even states, more than once, that they're not suppose to be using the book and that it's 'less than legal' even in hell.

So far, Stella has only been attacking Stolas. Striker knows Octavia is Stolas's main weakness, but hearing all the 'Blitzy' mentions during torturing, maybe he'll relay that there's another way they can exploit him. After all, Stella just thinks of him as any interchangeable Imp.

Stolas stated before that he would not leave Octavia, so maybe this was the reason he returns to the palace? But not soon enough, considering...*

The voice over does not match the scene, but it is as follows:

"You never loved mother and you don't love me, you love HIM!"*

Back to the image, is Via a fast learner or does she have the Grimoire? During the Loo Loo Land flashback, Stolas, having studied the book for a decade at that point, still needed it to travel to other planets.

And IMP seemed to be using the crystal in the last episode..

And if that's not complicated enough, let's get back to the Hell High Council meeting,

It sounds like they're discussing Stolas, before Vassago asks, "Where is Stolas, anyway?" Before demanding that they summon him, "at once!" Fortunately, this parrot's suppose to be a good guy, since unfortunately it seems like Stolas is in real more trouble.

Is it the illegal spellbook loaning? The (still alive?) D.H.O.R.K.S. having him on film? Satan help him if someone also managed to record him twerking on stage at the Verosika Mayday show.

We'll have to wait and see, but Stolas appears to return to the mansion with Blitz afterwards.

< / End MASSIVE SPECULATION >

Well, that's what I came up with. We've got 6 more months to go, and as the episodes do FINALLY get aired things might become more clear.

#helluva boss #helluva boss spoilers #stolitz #stolas #blitzø #blitzo #striker helluva boss

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scribble-dribble-writes · 1 year

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Hello, how are you?, if your request is open, you could write about Miguelito who is afraid to kiss you and end up hurting you because of his fangs (little does he know what reader (she is also a spider woman, she loves him in every way mostly your animalistic or arachnid side ) a little sexual tension please, of course if you feel comfortable, thank you.

Hehehehe this was a unique ask so I had to play around with it. But I hope you like it 💖💖💖

Regresa a mí

You were swinging your way across Nueva York when you spotted him. He was gliding through the sky, his outfit making him look menacing even in daylight but for you it was the perfect time to strike. You had known him since before his days as the vigilante he was now, with his fangs and claws. When he was a genetic scientist sitting down in his cubicle given his large frame, his head would peak over the separator. You knew him well because long ago you had been his colleague, sharing pleasant smiles as you passed by each other in the corridor but the night everything changed for Miguel, it changed your life too.

You had loved him then, secretly, and when you heard of the plot his father had conspired to have him killed, you knew you had to get him to safety. So you ran, putting aside all your work and folders as the only goal that circled through your mind now was to find him.

He was there, working after hours and you breathed a sigh of relief as he sat there hunched over his computer typing in his data from today’s results.

“Miguel.”, you called for him in hushed tones as you rushed to him.

“Miguel, you need to leave now.”, you placed your hand on his shoulder, turning him to face you against his wish.

“I’ve still got work to finish.”, he said, muttering your name in frustration.

“I don’t care, you’ve got to go, your father…”, you felt a sting rise up your arm.

“Your father…”, you tried to speak but your words began to slur, the world around you began to blur. Turning your wrist, you saw a robotic spider scurry away from your arm in it’s back an empty vial which contained a liquid you knew well about. The one you had worked on, a kind of poison that affects your neuro system.

You collapsed but he had caught you in his arms, frustration now replaced with worry as his tapped your cheek, saying your name like a plea for you to tell him what was wrong. But you couldn’t, you could only watch as he winced when he got stung in the neck by a similar bug.

However, Miguel was the only one with the target on his back, you were just collateral damage. As your paralyzed form laid on the floor, you witnessed him getting dragged away, when the words you wanted to tell him died in your mouth.

You should not have survived, he shouldn’t have either but somehow he did and in turn, he had come back for you as you were gasping for air faintly, holding on for whatever reason you weren't sure of.

The memories from that night were hazy but you remembered the distinct warmth of his touch as he plugged you to a system, the concern in his eyes as he placed an oxygen mask over your face and the words, the words that you could never forget as they repeated over and over in your mind every night since then.

“regresa a mí.”, he said as he caressed your cheek and the will to live only grew stronger.

You breathed into whatever concoction he had made and it burned your lungs, the antidote shot through your system making you blackout. When you woke up, your world was different, you had powers from a mutation that had occurred, making you the first recruit to his elite society.

But now, now you were rivals. Everyday a competition to see who bests the other. You shared similar traits with him, your mutation had cause you to develop claws along with other qualities a spider person would have. He was unfortunate, to not have spider sense or the ability to climb walls, which always made you think you were better and that made him adamant to prove you otherwise.

So now as he was right above you, you pressed down on the button on your wrist to spin your web around his ankles, once secured, you yanked on it and watched as he began to fall under your control.

“Argh”, you heard him grunt with annoyance.

“Should have known I would bump into you.”, he grumbled but you could sense the smirk with which he said it.

But before you could react, he tore free from your clutches using the blades on his arm and in turn got a hold of you.

He swung through the skyscrapers as he held you onto his side, his hand resting securely on your waist. He didn’t let you go, the eyes on his mask widening upon realizing how close you were.

But time had slowed, off late he’d been wanting to thank you, for trying to save him when no one did. The world around him had begun to blur and for the first time he wanted to pause, to remove your mask and hold your face in his hand.

“Sorry Miguel, but I don’t need a romantic tour of the city.”, he heard you speak as you slipped from his hold, to fall straight into the traffic below.

“It’s not romantic.”, he yelled after you as you timed your fall, to pull up at the right time to skim over passing cars. Turning to look over your shoulders, you smiled as you spotted him following you.

“It sure felt like it.”, you laughed wanting to annoy him further.

You swung past your milestone point, a deli around the corner , it was only a few more blocks away from your checkpoint, to have won against him in this agility race once again. You propelled yourself higher as you passed through decorative steel rings just to flex on how well you knew your way around the city.

“How does it feel to lose every single day?”, you asked him only to see him use all his limbs as he chased you down, his claws scrapping against the brick façade. His muscles contracting and expanding that for a second you had forgotten about everything else.

“It's only because you’ve got an advantage, you're more agile.”, he huffed.

“So you do agree, that I’m better than you.”, your focus on the race had wavered upon hearing the defeat in his voice.

All you’ve ever craved for was to hear the sound of your name on his lips, said with an edge of pride to it, keeping up this rivalry made it fun, to get him feel flustered over you.

But while you were distracted, he had managed to gain an edge over you as he used the base of a signage to swing higher, now closer to the finish line than you were.

You let out a curse as you bit down on your lip, your weakness for him was evident. Always distracted when he entered a room, your eyes always searching for him, your heart pegged on every word he said. Your feelings were the same since that night and his were too, he didn’t regard you any differently than before and therefore what he had said was only adding to the confusion.

Why were you important to him that he wanted you back?

You weren’t going to let him win, that meant the only time he spent around you, indulging in these games would grow lesser and lesser until one day he would all together end up forgetting you.

Being held in his gaze when you frustrated him meant you lived in his thoughts, atleast for a second.

So you swung into him as his back faced you, your momentum knocking him and you to the ground as you crashed onto the roof of a hotel. Your checkpoint. He was the first to rise as you coughed, clutching your side.

The fun in the tone of his voice had vanished, now it only held worry as he said your name in hurried breaths.

“Are you hurt?”, he carried you.

“Why do you have to be so reckless?”, he fussed over you.

“Always putting yourself at risk.”, he cribbed as he checked your hands and you let him, because moments like these where the only time he got close to you.

His mask disintegrated and his face came into view, you gasped, it had been so long since you had seen the brown of his eyes, the faint cut on his forehead from when he got hurt in his lab when you were around to place a bandage over it, still remembering the smell of his shampoo as you leaned in.

Harbouring these memories seemed to be more cruel than whatever this mutation was. Because it meant you had to spend all your time around him while never getting to touch him.

“I’m fine, Miguel.”, you brushed away his hand, suddenly not feeling the mischief from before because now it had only begun to hurt.

You got up to walk away but he didn’t let you, his hand caught your wrist and you wanted to break free, to bury him in the past, to move on and yet you were tied to his life. You and him were of the same kind, the only spiders to have these odd mutations. You made sense when you were with him. You weren’t an unique entity anymore, when you stood my him, you were mirror images, sharing the same struggle and pain.

“There, you won today.”, you mumbled not wanting to look at him.

He reeled you to him, till you tumbled into his arms as he caught you, his eyes searching your masked face, annoyed that he couldn’t see you.

So in this privacy of the corner behind the maintenance area, in the cool shadow the wall cast over you both, shielding you from the city’s gaze, you felt the soft touch of his finger at the base of your neck. He fiddled with the ends of your hair that had managed to stick out, his gaze now lost as though he had dreamed of this. Your motivation to run was now forgotten, your body now comfortable in his hold because you had longed for it, for his love, even before you had both become freaks.

He hooked his index finger under the elastic of your mask and slowly peeled it away, his eyes drinking in the details of your face, the colour of your skin, the shape of your lips, the slant of your nose, the rise of your cheeks as though he was seeing you for the first time. He froze when his eyes met yours, the last time you were this close was when you telling him to go home. You looked away but he placed his fingers on your cheek, to tilt you to look at him, to hold his gaze, because in your eyes there existed a version of him, that wore a lab coat and enjoyed ordinary existence.

That’s why he couldn’t be around you, you were all he had, a connection to a past that was lost and yet you were also half of him. He had used half of his antidote on you, to safe you from the fate of the poison, to get you back. And since then he had been a coward, avoiding you or indulging in competitive play just so he could be in the periphery of your life. Because the man you had cared for didn’t exist anymore, the scientist who you worked with wasn’t him anymore.

He leaned in towards you but he caught himself. He had seen you at one of the office parties, he hid in the corner along with you and in the mesmerizing light of the mirroball, he had wanted to kiss but instead he downed his drink and looked away. Now, he turned away from you, now if he tried, he would only end up hurting you.

“I’ve never won. I’ve only lost it all.”, he said and it caught you, unsure if he was even talking of the race or the pain of the past.

You wanted to touch his cheek, pristine in this light, he looked solid and beautiful, but you held back. Your claws didn’t respond to your command yet. A small distraction and they would dig into anything you held. You couldn’t leave him with further scars. So you sighed, as you slumped in his arms, both of you caught in a silence that seemed heavy.

“regresa a mí.”, you said and his eyes flashed to yours.

“What does it mean?”, you asked even though you knew what it meant. You wanted to hear him say it, you wanted to know why he said it.

“Where did you hear it?”, he asked as he sat down with you on him.

You caught his gaze. Why were you both lying?

“You said it.”, you furrowed your brows in confusion. Maybe all this while you had gotten it wrong. He could have just said it for the sake of it and here you were being a fool.

“You still remember it?”, he gave in, giving you a bemused look.

“When it plagues my dreams, how can I not?”, you turned to see the top of the shimmering towers to hide the blush in your cheeks.

“Why did you say it?”, you asked, not wanting to wait any longer.

He tilted his head back, to rest it on the wall behind him. A sad smile spreading across his face as he began to reminisce.

“You bumped into me in the corridor and my coffee splashed all over your coat. Yet you got me a refill with your number written on the side. You could have danced away the night at that office party and yet you chose to stand by me. And that night…”, he closed his eyes as he sighed and you knew the ache he felt. It was why it felt soothing to be by his side. You shared a sadness that only in each other’s company did it have a possibility to turn into happiness.

“You could have gone home. You could have left me to my fate. Instead here you are, suffering the cost of trying to warn me.”, his eyes slowly found yours.

“Why?”, he asked softly that the tone of his voice was a dagger to your heart.

“Why did you ask for me to come back to you?”, you answered it with a question. Only if he told you the truth first.

“Because you and I are the same. We are the same kind and without you… without out you, I don’t make sense.”, he said it in an urgency almost as if it had been pent up all these years.

“Now why didn’t you go home that night?”, he held you by your shoulders.

“Why did you have to risk your life to save mine?”, he shook you and you couldn’t keep it together longer.

“I had to. I couldn’t lose you.”, you responded but he didn’t seem satisfied with it.

“No, why did you do it?”, he edged closer as though this particular question had kept him up at night.

“Because I loved you.”, your eyes were fixed on his, not wanting to shy away anymore.

“And as stupid as it sounds, I still do. You, you’re the other half of me. That catastrophic night has tied us together forever and I can’t seem to leave you behind.”, you admitted crumbling into his arms, tucking your head under his chin as if you would loved to just be frozen here.

“But it’s cruel and unfair. We’re a forbidden match.”, he whispered as he placed his lips onto the top of your head.

“Because I can’t touch you?”, you asked and felt the depth of his sigh.

“Because I can’t kiss you.”, he said.

“You’ve never tried to.”, you told him as you pushed away from him to find his gaze.

“And have you?”, he asked.

“Yes.”, you smiled sheepishly.

“Whenever you weren’t looking at me.”, you said quietly to watch his eyes soften.

He took your hands in his and slowly raised it up to his cheek as you fought his hold.

“No, Miguel, stop.”, you panicked, you could feel your claws beginning to protract. To scratch the surface of his skin but it didn’t seem to bother him.

“The trick to dealing with claws is…”, he paused, your hand secure in his as it hovered over his cheek.

“is to forget you have them.”, he said it as he held your gaze and as you calmed down, you began to forget, about the claws, about the past, about everything else. You drowned into the thick brown clay of his eyes and gasped as you felt the soft skin of his cheek under your fingers for the first time, your claws weren’t there anymore. He reveled in the warmth of your fingers as he leaned into it and you leaned closer to him.

But the closer you got, the more he froze.

“Claws aren’t the same as fangs.”, he tried to hold you away but you held both his wrists in your hands and gently pinned them to the side. He could have used his entire force to stop you but he didn’t. He didn’t, because he wanted to be proved wrong.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”, he said quietly as he closed his eyes.

“The beauty of being the same spider species is that”, you paused, to hover over his lips as he exhaled ragged breaths.

“I’m immune to your venom.”, you whispered as you kissed him and you couldn’t hold him down anymore. The moment his hands broke free, they were everywhere, in your hair, up your thighs, behind your waist.

You felt the sharp tip of his fang as your tongue traced over it and it only seemed to fuel him more. Your claws hadn’t emerged and so you sunk your hand into the ends on his hair. He picked you up, to place you on the floor to get on top of you as he never let go of your lips, he made you breathless that the moment you pulled away you gasped for air, he placed kisses on the length of your neck to run the tip of his nose under your jaw to tilt your face, to expose the underside of it to cover it with the impression of his lips.

The edges of his teeth traced the surface of your skin sending a shock through your system when you heard him hum, as your claws scratched his back, his suit protecting him from getting hurt.

“You’re the only woman for me.”, he laughed against your skin, murmuring words in spanish adoring you as he continued to let his lips roam. His hands gathering all your hair in his hands as he held you firm against his chest.

“Hmm enough talking.”, you mumbled pulling him by the width of his neck to you and that was all he needed, for his eyes to turn into slits as his lips found yours again, his tongue nudging the corner of your mouth to deepen the kiss as you forgot about the world around you.

There was no sign of tragedy here anymore.

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