#they’re literally what tell us how she got her position and what her position is beyond just being a security guard

[chipistrate]

If Vanessa is the protagonist in HW2, where would the training simulator made to help someone find out what they want to do at the plex fit in, when she seemed to just have a very normal interview?

She was “recommended” for the position, she wasn’t recommended to work at the plex as a whole- she was recommended to work security. If she got that position, why would she need to go through this whole training simulator of every job in the Pizzaplex? We haven’t even seen any night time security minigames(though that would be cool(no SL night doesn’t count))

Not necessarily doubting the theory, just wondering how the timeline would work/gen

[cheriladycl01]

Would you write a Carlos or Max x reader please where she’s a driver too. They’re always worried about her when she races but they’re not prepared when she gets into a serious crash just running errands to the store. They get a call from her caller ID expecting her to have forgotten something but it’s a police officer or paramedic telling them she’s been in an accident. Thank you!

Is this Mr Sainz? - Carlos Sainz x Driver! Verstappen Reader x (Brother) Max Verstappen

Plot: You get into a car crash when shopping for the first food shop before a race weekend.

You were used to driving, it was literally your job at a professional level as a driver in Formula One driver. And you were good too, having 3 wins under your belt in only your third year in the sport.

Sometimes it felt like you only had your seat because you were a Verstappen, but racing was in your blood and you were becoming just as much of a menance as your brother on track.

You also had your boyfriend Carlos who you’d been dating since you were in F2. You never thoughtyou’d make it as far as F1, but after proving yourself in your F2 season, and not struggling too much without power steering, you were promoted.

Having Carlos and Max on track with you was so fun as you were always teasing and making jokes with each other especially in interviews and on Thursday media days.

Carlos and Max however hated the fact that they had to race you and track an that you were good enough to actually fight for position with the pair of them. They were both pretty worried about you before they got into the car. Once they were on track they both tried to consider you as just another car, but admitidly that was pretty hard.

They never thought about you normally driving… it was such a mundane thing compared to driving round tracks at around 250mph.

“Hello is this Mr Sainz?” the call came through whilst Carlos, Max, Lando, Oscar, Charles and Pierre were all in the hotel lobby just waiting around having drinks and talking. It was your caller ID so Carlos didnt think anything off it when he picked it up to here … well not you on the other end.

You were out, getting some snacks for in the hotel room. Everyone had sent you their orders and you’d gone out by yourself wanting some time alone ahead of the race weekend.

You were walking around the large shop, picking out what was given from the list before heading to the checkout. It was getting kind of late, and it was media day tomorrow so you wanted to go back as soon as possible.

“Hi, how are you?” You smile at check out lady who looks shocked to see you before starting to scan your items.

“I’m okay! How are you?” she asks back still looking over you in shock and you try not to chuckle at her reaction.

“I’m pretty good, just shopping for some snacks for my friends. This was the nearest place, its really nice in here” you smile as you take the items off her and pack them into one of your reusable bags.

“That’s gonna set you back $82.52” she says, her American accent coming through. You smile and shake your head.

“On snacks, my god I forgot how many people I was buying for” you chuckle handing over your black card and putting the food back into the trolley.

“Thank you so much! You’ve been so helpful!” you smile before you walk outside going to the car you had rented and loading up the boot of the car.

“Yes this is he” he says with a confused look, furrowing across his brows as he glances a the group who are also looking over to him.

“You are listed here as the emerency contact for a Y/N Verstappen yes?” the voice asks and Carlos feels his heart skip a beat. He looked over to Max, who was now chatting and joking around with Lando.

“Hold for one second please” he says before muting the call.

“Max, come outside. Now…” Carlos says gruffy, before walking outside to a quiet area where there arent any people to interrupt.

“Yes I am the emergency contact for Y/N Verstappen” Carlos sighs and Max freezes.

“She’s been in an accident and we are requesting you and a Max Vertsappen, her second emergency contact at he hospital immedielty” he explains and Max and Carlos share a look.

“What happened?” Max asks, a pause from the officer slighty confused at the different accent change.

“Whos this?”

“I’m her brother Max Vertsappen” he says, his tone cold.

“Well, it looks like she was coming back from the shops and a drunk driver ran through a red light and went into the side of her car crossing the road. She’s in surgery right now but that’s all i can confirm right now” he offers and tears build up in Carlos’ eyes. Max is sort of frozen in shock before he shakes himself out of it.

“We’ll be there as soon as possible, St David’s I’m guessing?” he asks and gets cofirmation from the officer before hanging up Carlos’ phone for him.

“Carlos come on” Max says pulling at his fellow drivers wrist who is now the frozen one with a blank look on his face.

“I-“ he starts but cant say anything.

“Carlos come on, this cant wait!” Max exclaims before the older man wakes himself up from his daze and follows Max to the lobby where their friends are waiting.

“Can one of you drive us to the hospital, we’re both to irratic to be behind the wheel right now” Max asks, looking at everyone who’d stopped their convrsations the minute the absent duo had come back in.

“What? What’s happened are you. okay?” Charles asks standing up.

“It’s Y/N she got into a car crash, drunk driver or something and she’s in the hospital right now” Carlos explains to the group.

“I’ll drive!” Lando agrees quickly, before taking them out to his McLaren, Carlos sat next to him while Max sat in the back.

“Whoever did this is going to pay” Max spits out angrily, tapping against the back of Lando’s seat.

“She’ll be okay, she’s like the strongest person i know” Lando replies looking in the rear view mirror at Max before concentrating back on the road.

They get to the hospital in record time running into the emergency department trying to look for Y/N.

“I’m going to go get some flowers and chocolate for her, you guys let me know the room shes in yeah?” Lando says knowing that they just want to ask and see how she is.

They nod the younger driver off before hounding the receptionist with questions.

“Is Y/N Verstappen here?” Carlos asks.

“She was in a car crash, an officer said she was in surgery?” Max asks.

“She’s an F1 Driver has her team been informed about the accident, what about her family?” Carlos asks.

“Slow down. I unfortunaltley dont have the answer to any of those questions but the first. She’s here, I’m not sure if she’s out of surgry yet but I will. page her doctor to come see you both. Please in the meantime take a seat” she directs them to the smaller and more privte waiting area.

Carlos takes a seat first his head in his hands while Max starts to make calls to his mum and dad and ther sister letting them know what was going on and telling them the limited knowlege he had on the situation.

In the time they’d been waiting, it had gotten out to h general public that you’d been in a car crash and articles and posts had been made online regarding the situation.

“For Y/N Verstappen?” a lady calls in a longwhite coat clipbaord in hand. Carlos’ head lifts up from his hands and he steps up towards the lady as Max hangs up.

“Yes?” Max asks looking over to the doctor.

“Your sister Y/N is out of surgery, it was hard work but she’ll make a full recovery in time. She’s a fighter and we really thought we’d lost her for a second. She’s asleep right now but you can visit” she smiles offering to guide them through the area.

“Thank you” Carlos’ cries pulling Max in for a hug, leaning agaisnt his shoulder before they follow the doctor through to your room.

You were asleep on the hospital bed, some wires and other medical tech strapped up to you and Max never thought he’d see you like this, he’s prayed you’d never ever be in this situation. He hated seeing you, looking so fragile and vulnerable.

Eventually your anesthetic wore off and you were woken up to voices lightly talking and rays of sun bursting through the window. The first thing you notice is how relaxed your body is. Not that you knew right now but the morphine you were on for pain was making you very woozy.

“Mmmmmm” you groan as you try to move.

“Hey baby” you hear lightly from next to you, your eyes fluttering open to meet your boyfriends.

“Hi Carlos” you smile soflty looking at him and the worried look on his face.

That’s when yourmind becomes a little less fuzzy and you realsise you are neither at home or in the hotel.

“You were in a car crash, you had us worried” you hear your brother admit.

“Mmmm Max?” you asklooking around the room seeing the various flowers and cards and noticing it was a hospital room.

“We’re here” he smiles coming to stand the other side of the bed.

“We’ll always be here for you” Carlos adds, holding your hand.

Taglist:

@littlebitchsposts @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @eiraethh @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @viennakarma @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount

[transmascissues]

next time someone tries to tell me people don’t demonize and act violently toward trans men and transmascs, i’m just going to make them read this reply i got to a positivity post that was specifically about trans manhood and transmasculinity. this is basically just every negative thing people say no one says about us rolled into one message that’s aimed directly at us.

and as if this isn’t enough on its own, their whole blog is full of this disgusting shit. it seems to be dedicated to it, actually. (fair warning, don’t look at the next two screenshots if you don’t want to see even more genuinely awful transphobia.)

you can say what you want about how they’re probably just a troll or baiting or doing this for attention but the fact remains that, regardless of their true intentions, these are real things that a real person is saying about trans men&mascs, publicly and proudly and to our faces because they want it to do damage.

i’ve dealt with people like this before, on a much closer level. when i was a teenager, i had a grown woman come into my dms just to send me very graphic and detailed instructions on how to kill myself. literally entire paragraphs with all of the steps she wanted me to take. before i blocked her, i told her she was lucky she sent it to me and not someone more vulnerable, because otherwise she might have real blood on her hands. she just sent the whole thing again.

we can argue all day about infantilization versus demonization, erasure versus hypervisibility, what counts as violence, what words we use to talk about our oppression, and so on. but the reality is, whether you believe people want us dead or not, they clearly do, and a lot of them really aren’t making any effort to hide it. at this point, if you can’t see it, it’s because you don’t care about our lives enough to look at the reality that’s right in front of your face.

before you do anything else, block this person. don’t engage with them directly, don’t give them the satisfaction of the attention they might be fishing for, just block them. but don’t forget that they exist either, especially if you’re not a trans man or transmasc yourself. don’t just block them and move on and forget that there are real people out there who will say these things about us, who genuinely enjoy the thought that their actions might have deadly consequences.

because these are the people you empower to come out of hiding and start being blatant about their hatred when you insist that no one wants us dead, when you openly mock us and demonize us and try to cast us out from the community that we were supposed to share. when even our own people decide we’re an acceptable target, these bigots throw a fucking party because you’ve just told them they can get away with murder as long as it’s our blood on their hands. this particular blog was started recently, and i guarantee it’s not a coincidence that they started it in the midst of a rise in online anti-transmasculinity.

it really is telling, how much hate a positivity post has incited. y’all can’t stand when we talk about the bad things that happen to us, but you hate our happiness even more.

[moneymartin]

okau i know u already did these but can u do more nsfw hcs for nika???

✧.* - smutty nika hcs

warnings: this whole thing is literally smut sooo… 18+

afab!r

a/n: im havin fun with these ngl… if anything is repeated from the og hcs im sorry!!!! got carried away and some of my thoughts r sprinkled around here

MUNCHHHHHH

she gets off on eating you out i swear

nika got a pussy eater jaw too

i think its because you squeeze your thighs around her head

she likes it

i said this the last time but your pleasure matters more to her than her own

100% a titty girl like i can see it

LOVE LOVE LOVESSS THEM

like during sex she’ll cup them any chance she gets

an ass girl too

stares at em in public w no shame and grabs at your butt when she can 😭

veryyy vocal

lots of huffing and puffing when it comes to her

whiner and whimperer when she hears you getting more comfortable abt the noises you’re making

loves when you moan her name don’t even get me started

grunts too fosho

i think she’d talk in croatian too and it turns you AWNNNNNNNN

“ljubavi” “moj anđele” “dušo” “dobra cura”

dirty talks in croatian too but idk how to translate that.

she’d dom half of the time but if you wanna dom she’ll gladly oblige

strap game is crazy

totally does that thing where she teases you really slowly then js plunges into you

😩😩😩😫

never rough unless asked but if she’s angry or upset she’ll go WILLDDDDD

call me crazy but she’d def like it if you bit…

i think she’d be the hardest teaser ever

esp in public.

if you’re really feeling it when you two are out she can tell

its like her superpower

uses it against you too cs she doesn’t wanna let you get it easy

her fingers are running up and down your thighs and shes always getting sooo close it fucks you up every time

she gets you WET w one touch its actually crazy

if you were touch deprived it’d be even worse too like if she brushed her lips up against you and breathed on your skin js a lil you’d FREEAK

freak as in you’d be SOOOOAKKED

please tell me you guys think she’d wanna film sex tapes

JUST FOR YOU TWO ONLY THO

she a secret freak for those

i think arguments would lead into rlly fucking hot angry sex

but she initiates the intimacy first after bc she knows you’re def not gonna be in the mood to do so

honestly it starts w really small touches to the arm while you two yell back and forth

the next thing you know you two are fucking on the kitchen counter 😭

or she has to literally manhandle you onto the bed and fucks you there instead 🥸

uses the strap durin that too u can’t tell me otherwise

i think if you got really horny in public out of nowhere she’d take care of it for you IMMEDIATELYYYY

the family restrooms.

or the car

CAR SEX IS HER THINGGGGG ALSO

you guys could be in the car while on a roadtrip and she’ll find a way to sneak a hand onto you to make you feel good 🤫

def eats you out in the backseat too

say its your first time

definitely takes it as slowwww as you need her to be

offers to just use her hands or something first so that you get used to it

but if you wanna like go rlly far for the first time she’ll do it for sure as long as you’re comfy

she loves when you touch her abs it turns her on 😫

makes you ride em for sure cs she fucking loves when they’re glistening in your cum

makes you lick it up CLEAN after too w your tongue

WOW WHATS WRONG WITH ME OMG

she’s a switch

power bottom and soft dom

super slow when she tops you

but she lovesss when you’re riding her strap too its her fav thing next to the ab riding

ouhhhh she loves eye contact

her eyes r so beautiful like

they get all predatory when she’s fucking you its so sexy

also when she gives you the fuck me eyes i think she means it in the opposite way

meaning she wants to fuck you

cowgirl is her fav position don’tttt play

again shes a titty girl

she loves looking at them bounce.

she doesn’t bother to get fully undressed cause it shows she cares more about you

okay im done thanks.

[hencheri]

18+. mdni.

pairing: mean!xiaojun x fem!reader x mean!hendery

warnings: noncon, implied kidnapping, physical abuse, xiaojun is like really mean.

wc: 1.7k

part 2.

“hey, don’t damage her even more… she already looks a mess,” hendery complains, seeing the rough state that you are in. makes you look pretty unattractive, but xiaojun seemingly doesn’t care as much as he does. 

“she’s fine,” his friend replies, and he knows you’re not really fine, but you’re awake. that counts. 

you’re on the floor, back against the wall with your arms restrained with a piece of grey duct tape. hendery is right; you’re in terrible shape. your eyes are red from your non-stop crying, cheeks still wet and skin irritated. your hiccuping doesn't help either, it makes you look pitiable. 

it’s not like hendery thought you would react in a different way, that’s how he imagined it, he just doesn’t want to make it worse. 

on the other hand, xiaojun doesn’t mind it at all. he can agree that you’re far from pretty right now, but beauty isn’t a detail he cares about. at least, not in a moment like this. what’s the point of taking a poor girl like you if it’s not to make her cry?

he crouches beside you, and the fearful look you give him makes his cock twitch in his sweats. he tries to take a hold of your chin, but you flinch away before he can. you clearly don’t want xiaojun to be anywhere near you, which is understandable considering he was pulling on your hair and pushing you to the floor over and over again moments ago, quite literally playing with you.

he reaches out again and grasps your chin between his fingers, forcing you to face the both of them with hendery standing in front. 

“look,” xiaojun says, letting go of your face to give little taps to your cheek. “she’s alright. mmh, princess? tell dery how you’re feeling.”

it feels cruel the way xiaojun is toying with you. it isn’t fair.

you let out a groan, moving away from his hand, but he stops touching you, looking expectant of an answer.

you lay your gaze on hendery, muttering with trembling lips, “i’m good.”

he sighs, looking exasperated and annoyed xiaojun made you say something that everyone in this room knows is a lie. it doesn’t matter very much at this point anyway. you’re here in the powerless position they wanted to see you in, and they’re going to do what they planned.

“great. now come on,” the man beside you stands up, grabbing your bicep so you can do the same. 

he pulls you away from the dingy white wall of the hotel, and you follow him with teary eyes, your vision blurry. you’re pushed onto the nearest bed, a gasp slipping past your lips, body bouncing on the thick bed sheets. 

you squirm around to turn onto your back, mainly using your knees that hurt so much, covered in bruises because of xiaojun’s violent handling. despite hendery being more gentle with you, he still has the same intentions as his friend. he might be even more eager than him. 

when you’re on your butt, you rapidly drag yourself to the headboard, putting a distance between you and them. it’s not enough to be safe, though. 

“please,” you cry out, curling up on yourself. but begging isn’t going to help you out. 

they just ignore you, even though their stare is nowhere else than on your body. 

hendery walks up to you, extending his arm to your face. he flattens the hair on top of your head, his hand larger than your skull. he tucks the curly flyaways behind your ear, trying his best to make you look less disheveled. 

he then turns to xiaojun who also got closer at you. “go ahead.”

having permission, hendery looks back at you and your eyes fill with worry, guessing where this is going. 

the thrash of your legs is useless, only forcing hendery to really hurt you this time. he didn’t seem to dislike it; maybe it bothers him only when he’s not the cause of your pain. forcing your thighs apart once your crotch is completely bare, hendery lies on his stomach, head hovering over your cunt. 

you flinch when he lets a glob of spit fall on your sex, hating the wet and weird feeling of it gliding down on you. he first bites into your inner thighs, leaving the imprint of his teeth on you, eventually moving up to your pussy. 

you let out a high pitched gasp when he puts his whole mouth on you, his brown bangs going into his eyes and tickling your bare skin. he starts sucking on your clit, sending little shocks of pleasure throughout your body, making your hips jerk upward. 

you’re getting wet, you know it, you feel it. and hendery knows it, too, his eyes glancing up at you from his spot between your legs. he keeps his pace going, laying his tongue on your bud and toying with it. 

he circles your entrance with his middle finger, groaning against your cunt when he feels that you’re indeed dripping wet. he slides it in, and without his strong grip on your thighs, you quickly close them around his head. 

hendery grunts, annoyed you’re preventing him from moving freely, but he continues nonetheless. he can deal with it. 

he adds another finger and with just a little bit more effort, he makes you cum in his mouth. it was surprisingly really quick. 

he slowly pumps his fingers in you until you stop shoving your pussy onto face, tied hands pulling on his hair without realizing it. the irony that you were afraid of them touching you and now you’re keeping hendery’s head between your legs. 

hendery finally removes his head away from your clenched thighs, his hair tousled because of your grabby hands. 

“you’re a needy little thing, huh?” he smiles, putting his fingers into his mouth, and then slipping them out when they’re clean from your cum. 

you don’t answer, getting distracted by xiaojun who changes spots, casually walking to your side. meanwhile, hendery moves up to you, his body fitting between your legs and sitting up on his knees. 

xiaojun looks down at you, once again holding your chin, but this time his fingers press down really hard on your cheeks, making you wince. “she’s a slut,” he comments and hendery hums in agreement. “who enjoys this way too much.” 

you aren’t, but xiaojun seems to say a lot of untrue things just to humiliate you. because that’s what it is; humiliation. blood creeping up in your face, making your cheeks burn, tears flowing down from your eyes. 

he shifts his hand on your face and slips his thumb between your lips. he watches you taking his finger, analyzing the way your mouth closes around it. he presses down on your tongue, muffling your sudden moan at the same time hendery pushes his hard cock into you. you didn’t even realize he had slid his pants down until you felt his tip aligning with your entrance. 

he thrusts all the way in and it hurts. so much. you can only touch his abdomen with your fingers, pushing to get him off of you, but of course it does nothing. in fact, it makes him immediately start pounding into you, not caring for your cries. 

xiaojun stares down at you intently, popping his thumb out of your mouth to swipe it over your lips, smearing the bottom of your face in your own saliva. hendery, despite having shown some sympathy, doesn’t hold himself back on you. his cock stretches you out painfully, and even though he provided some preparation, it still doesn’t make the uncomfortable feeling go away. 

your body goes up and down as hendery fucks into you, your mouth wide open, broken cries and moans escaping from it while xiaojun runs his fingers over your lips. his other hand covers the bulge in his sweatpants, lightly applying pressure onto it. 

his crotch comes too close to your face, and he knows that you dread it. he knows that you hate him the most. he thinks it’s futile, he only gave your knees a few bruises. there’s much worse than a couple of popped veins and sharp pulls to your hair. 

but right when he pushes your face toward his clothed cock, the sound of a ringtone is heard. xiaojun turns his head in its direction while hendery slows his pace down. 

“is it yours?” xiaojun asks his friend, lifting up his eyebrow. 

“nah,” hendery replies.

and so xiaojun lets go of you, not without giving a light slap to your cheek, making you whine. he goes to your bag thrown on the floor, the ringtone sounding from there. he searches a little before pulling out your phone. a grin forms on his face when he reads the name of the contact who’s calling you; ‘daddy’.

he comes back to the both of you, hendery curiously looking at the phone in his hand, getting a glimpse of it. 

“should we answer?” xiaojun taunts, showing you the screen. your heart jumps in your chest when you see it and you vigorously shake your head from side to side. “why not? must be important.” 

hendery laughs, joining xiaojun’s teasing. “don’t wanna show daddy how your vacations are going?” 

the thrusting of his hips plus their mocking laughs bring you to tears really fast. you continue to shake your head in disagreement. “no, no please…”

“we can’t show daddy how much of a slut you are… can we?” he turns your phone back to him, looking down at the screen. he only has to slide the pick-up icon to the right. that would be really cruel of him, he’ll admit, but will he care tomorrow? it’s not like you’ll be more than a one night thing. 

“please! don’t! i’ll do whatever you want- just, please, don’t answer!” you cry out desperately, just so powerless under hendery’s larger body, pinning your hips to the mattress while he pounds into you without any mercy. 

xiaojun scoffs, frowning his brows almost in disgust. “princess, you’re already doing what we want, we don’t need your permission.” 

your heart drops down when xiaojun answers the call, hendery’s smile getting bigger. 

that’s the worst part.

[serenefreakgeekao3]

Can we get a Jim Halpert x short!gn!reader who is just enamored with how much Taller Jim is than them. Like sometimes when they’re trying to reach up for something he suddenly just lefts them up so they can grab it, or if someone is bothering them he uses his hight to be intimating, and they just swoon. <3

Summary: Being the shortest person at Dunder Mifflin comes with a lot of problems- one namely being your boss, Michael Scott, who thinks he must be the newest and brightest comedian of their century. Spoiler alert: He’s really not. Warnings: short jokes (beware),  A/N: So i’ve been called short maybe once or twice, but to be completely honest I’m literally at the ‘average’ mark on the scale so i’m just here, existing in neither shortness nor tallness. However, i’ve always heard the ‘short jokes’ are unending so I figured I’d base it on that? Sorry i know they’re annoying, but hopefully Jim’s sweetness makes up for it

“Aha! There they are!” Michael calls out just as you enter, and you feel a deep sense of regret begin billowing into your stomach. “Winner of the shortest person award!” Michael’s laughter was boisterous, making you want to cringe away from him and just make it to your desk. Just make it there, at the very least. You did literally just walk into work, you haven’t even set your briefcase down yet. Michael thankfully jumps away from you, approaching accounting. “I’m surprised you’re not starting a real cat fight Angela, with how Y/N over there stole your special office title!”

“My official title is ‘Accountant,’ Michael,” Angela reminds him in a wary voice, huffing her displeasure at being spoken to. Michael just laughs and begins shrugging his shoulder against Angela’s own as if they shared a common joke. Angela just looks on in disgust as Michael continues on.

“Catfight, get it? ‘Cause you’re the cat lady!” Angela only scoffs and Michael continues his boisterous laugh, turning and making his way back to his office.

“Michael, don’t forget,” Pam calls out behind you as you place your bag onto your desk, the solo desk in the Quality Assurance position at Dunder Mifflin. You turn to watch this interaction, Pam looking frustrated as she shakes a wad of papers at the man. “You have that appointment with corporate in-”

“Don’t tell me what I do and don’t have Pam, god!” Michael pushes the wad of papers away and storms into his office, and you still can’t for the life of you figure out how Michael can switch between emotions so quickly. Your eyes scan the room- mostly the sales department- and wonder about where half of the team had wandered off to. Stanley remained sitting at his desk, but it seemed as if the rest of them had disappeared. You hear a quick ‘Psst!’ and turn to lock eyes with Pam, making your way over at a wave from her.

“Michael came out here before you got here, said something about a massive sale that he needed all of his sales associates to go on.” Pam stage-whispered over to you, and you nod along slowly.

“Ah, that makes sense-”

“So, yeah, that’s where Jim is.”

“Pam-” You start, looking around nervously before skirting around her desk to see her more eye-to-eye without having to stand on your toes. “Shush up! I told you that in confidence!” You watch Pam giggle, placing a hand to her mouth as she does.

“Oh I know,” Pam nods with wide eyes, leaning against her desk faux-casually as she watches you. “Just like Jim told me in confidence that-”

“What’s a couple of short stacks doing back behind this huge desk?” Jim’s voice emanates suddenly from behind you and you jump, turning with wide eyes toward him. He seems to be locking eyes with Pam, who giggles once more with her hand covering her mouth. You couldn’t quite translate Jim’s look to her, but it held some sort of meaning you were sure.

“Oh! Hey Jim! I thought you had that sales thing?” Jim raises an eyebrow toward you, crossing his arms with a smirk.

“I did but then I coughed at Dwight and got out of it. Figured they had enough people as is- but the real question here is: How did you know about the sales call? You weren’t in here when Michael announced it.”

“Watching for me, Jim?” You tease, circling the desk and making your way back to your own. Jim quickly skirted around the desk, following behind you.

“Well, yeah, obviously. You’re so tiny I have to know where you are so I don’t trip over you.” You groan at yet another short joke, rolling your eyes and turning to look at him with an unimpressed look. “But you didn’t answer my question.”

“Pam told me where you- where all the sales associates went.”

“Asking after me, Y/L/N?” You scoff loudly, turning to lean yourself against your desk, crossing your arms up at Jim.

“Pam volunteered the information, thank you very much.” You look up into Jim’s eyes and can’t help but feel shrouded by his form. He takes another step closer, pushing you over slightly to lean against your desk himself, and hunching toward you whether he realized it or not. He acted as a sort of shield from the rest of the office, which some days you definitely felt like you needed.

“And why would Pam do something like that?” Jim’s voice was quieter like he was accounting for the new distance- or lack thereof. You stare into his hazel eyes, swallowing roughly. You couldn’t help but feel safe in the shield of comfort that he provided.

“Perhaps because half of the room’s occupants were not seated at their usual desks, which is a rather odd occurrence for a day at work.” You turn, grabbing a random handful of papers and tapping them on your desk. “Speaking of, isn’t that something you should be doing?” Jim laughs, pushing himself to stand from your desk before turning and saluting at you, walking backwards back to his own desk.

“Touche, Y/N!”

“Watch where you’re going!” You didn’t mean to sound too worried as you called it out, but Jim just chuckled, shrugging toward you.

“Why? I’m already keeping my eye on one safety hazard.”

“Yes, because I’m so short, ha ha.”

Coffee.

That’s what you needed today was coffee. Perhaps multiple cups to get through this shitshow of a day. After Michael’s brilliant start to the day with the short jokes, it seemed he had retired to his room solely to come up with more jokes to torture you with. You weren’t sure why it was your turn to take all of Michael’s attention, but you were ready to throw in the towel and leave early for the day already. You could just start over tomorrow morning, no harm no foul! Except then Michael would cry because he didn’t think you liked his jokes- which you don’t- and then you’d have to deal with consoling him for a solid hour before he eventually yelled that he didn’t need pity, and you would respond that it’s not pity- which it was- and spend another hour consoling him of that as well. You would know- it’s happened before.

And now you didn’t even have Jim around to curb the jokes or turn them into something that was actually funny. After your play-fight with Jim, he was then swiped away by Stanley- who apparently was the last one of the sales associates left only because he had his own sales call to go on. He had begged Jim to tag along, and of course the man agreed considering how nice he is. What wasn’t nice was leaving you alone with Michael when- well, just ever really. So if you look at it that way, it really all was Jim’s fault. Stupid Jim.

You shook your head, waking yourself from your daydream as you stared at the coffee pot, urging it to brew faster. It was already filled with half a pot, and you knew technically you should wait for the full pot to brew before pouring any but you really needed caffeine in your life immediately. You wandered over to the drainer by the sink to grab a cup, then hesitated as you realized there were no cups laying there. There were no dishes at all, actually, indicating someone actually came in here and took the time to put the dishes away. That’d normally be a good and nice thing, aside from the fact that you were too short to reach the cabinets above the counter where the mugs were all stored. Sighing, you turn to look for the step stool you usually keep around. (Technically it was the office’s step stool, but you were the only one that ever had to use it.)

It wasn’t where you left it, over to the side of the counter and next to the table. Looking around the room, you couldn’t spot it still. You checked the bathroom, thinking maybe it was in there- there had been a time or two it was moved in there either for use or for storage- but you couldn’t find it there either. You didn’t bother to check the other bathroom, just huffing to yourself and placing your hands on your hips. Glaring upward at the cabinets above the sink, you will the doors to open and a cup to float down by itself. Then when that didn’t work, you got to work trying to stand on your toes and reach up. The handle to the door was just out of your reach, but you should be able to swipe it open, maybe-

You startled at a large hand intercepting your own, swiping you out of the way and opening the door. You set yourself off of your tip-toes, flat-footed now only to turn and notice Jim pressing you in close to the kitchen counter as he reaches above you. He pulls down a mug- your favourite mug, no less- and places it on the counter beside you. You were able to turn around in place, but Jim only places his hands on the counter to either side of you, blocking you in.

“You should ask for help next time,” Jim whispers down to you, and looking up into his hazel eyes has your heart doing funny things. Maybe it’s the crush you have, maybe you’ve just developed some sort of heart-stuttering problem that you’d need to get checked out, but with Jim’s proximity, you couldn’t really think straight to debate either at the moment. You bit your lip, glancing at your cup and back up to him before finally finding your voice.

“I had that perfectly fine-”

“You couldn’t even reach the door, Y/L/N.”

“Well, I’ll have you know I was trying to get two cups, so,” You were just about to turn when Jim lifted his gaze finally. You felt like you could finally breathe- for the one whole second it took for Jim to lean forward into your space to reach above your head. He pulled down another mug to set on the counter, and you pull in a deep breath full of his scent that only serves to make you dizzier. You lift your gaze to him again, shaking your head. “No, I just meant-”

“What, three cups?”

“Maybe,” You mumble out, turning to face the kitchen counter again. You reach up to try your own hand- you would not be two-upped by him- and it’s an even worse predicament than before. At least with the door handle you had even a chance, and right now you couldn’t even reach to touch the bottom of the cupboard. Attempting to stretch yourself further, already on your tip-toes, you were just about to give up when you felt two large hands grab right under your armpits. They heave you up, and suddenly you’re at a height that you’d never really seen this room at before. Quickly reaching forward, you take two more mugs into your hands before the hands slowly set you back down on your feet.

‘Holy hells, how strong is he?’ You think to yourself, turning to lift your gaze back up to Jim. He was smiling, likely on the verge of laughter, though he had yet to. You could feel your face heating up and knew that blush was lighting up your face. What were you supposed to do now? Jim just picked you up, how do you move on from that?

“Four cups?” Jim questions you as he reaches forward to one of the new ones you had grabbed, taking it from your hand to turn it over in his own. He probably chose to grab that one as it was the one you had seen him use the most often, you figured it might be his favourite. You hoped so at least, considering he was able to grab your favourite after just one try.

“Three,” You admit quietly, turning to watch the last of the coffee brew into the pot, “I grabbed an extra in case you wanted some.” Jim’s head shot up to look at you, and you tilted your head in confusion at the reaction. His eyes were wide, and if you didn’t know any better you would’ve said a slight blush was lighting up his own cheeks now. But why would offering him a cup of coffee make him embarrassed? “That’s only if you want some, of course.”

“I do!” He insisted, placing the cup down and spinning it slowly with one hand, staring at you the entire time. You got a little squirmy, reaching out to heft the large coffee pot and begin pouring it into your three cups. “Did you-” You glance briefly up at Jim- who was biting his lip by the gods is he trying to kill you?- before looking quickly back at your task so as to not spill any coffee. “Did you know this was my favourite cup?”

“Yeah,” You replied easily, watching his fingers stop spinning the cup right as you answer. “That’s why I grabbed that one.” You motion the pot over to his cup, watching him jump slightly before sliding his cup over toward you. You pour the coffee before replacing the pot back where it goes. You begin the process of adding sugar and creamer to the cups, sighing softly.

“So, why three cups? You being generous to someone else out there?”

“Nope,” You pop your mouth on the word, smirking up toward Jim before resuming your objective. “I just figured that the minimum amount of coffee I need to complete this day would be three cups, so I’m planning accordingly.” You hear Jim chuckle, smiling softly to yourself and beginning to add the sugar and creamer to Jim’s own- less than you like in yours, but that’s how he normally took it.

“Is that right? Did something happen that’s exhausting you today?”

“Just Michael and his dumb short jokes.”

“Ah,” Jim breathes out, leaning his hip against the counter and looking over his shoulder toward Michael’s office. “Did he do the old ‘appreciate the little things’ one?”

“Followed by a big hug, yep,” You sigh, taking one of the cups and scalding your mouth to take a drink of it. “Had to practically push him off of me.”

“And the miniature golf one?”

“‘Do you just call it regular golf?’” You repeat Michael’s joke from earlier, deepening your voice to mock him. Sighing, you take another large gulp and wince at the temperature. Jim reaches forward, seemingly unconsciously, and slowly lowers your cup to the counter, pushing it away from you. You wonder if he realized you were burning your tongue on it.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. Sounds like a rough day if he’s going all out.”

“Oh, absolutely. He also tried out a new one! ‘Sometimes when I look at short people, I wonder if they’re able to reach their goals!’” You turn at this, huffing out an aggravated breath. You had meant to tell this one as a joke, but just as it had hit you off guard before, it was hitting you again. You tried to keep from tearing up, but really- who wanted to work as Quality Assurance for a paper company? Obviously, you haven’t been able to reach your goals and Michael just unwittingly mocked you for that.

“Hey, hey,” Jim began, reaching an arm out to place against your upper arm, noticing how fragile you suddenly became. “That was uncalled for,” Jim agreed, stepping closer to you to tower over you once more, “I’m sure Michael didn’t mean for it to be that bad, he’s just trying to think up different short puns.” He patted your arm, squeezing it once before continuing, “You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if he had to go to his office to look them up. I bet he didn’t even come up with it on his own.”

You laugh blearily, raising a hand to wipe away a tear that had yet to fall, but almost did. Jim began rubbing your arm up and down, and you lifted your coffee cup once more to take a big gulp. You hear the door to the room open, hoping it wasn’t who you thought it was.

“Oh, there you are!” You hold back a groan at the sound of Michael’s voice, closing your eyes to try and rein in your feelings. “Hey, I have a good one! What do you call it when a short person says goodbye?” You can hear Michael’s excitement behind you, and while normally you’d feel bad for ruining that sort of happiness, you just really weren’t in the mood for it right now. “Y/N, hey! What do you call it when you say goodbye!” He taps on your shoulder, and you finally turn to look at him with your eyebrows raised.

“Michael,” Jim tries to inject, raising a hand between the two of you. Michael, too excited to stop, jumps up and down before he finally bursts out laughing, his words jumbled and almost unrecognizable.

“A microwave! Get it! Micro!” He laughs again, and you try to find any semblance of care to keep this job, anything to get you to smile at Michael and move on like you usually do. That’s when Jim steps in front of you, moving closer to Michael. You gulp, his whole body blocking your boss from you, and you slowly realize that Jim was backing Michael up to the wall, towering over him very specifically.

“What about me, Michael?” Jim takes another step forward, Michael stumbling on a backwards step. “Have any tall jokes for me?”

“But, tall jokes-”

“Michael,” Jim’s voice lowered, and while you couldn’t see his face you could almost hear how serious it must’ve looked. Michael scurries out from next to Jim, hurrying over to the door. He clears his throat, throwing an undisguised fearful look toward Jim before straightening his suit coat and turning to leave the room.

There was something about that- maybe Jim using his height for you or even defending you from someone you were obviously having problems with- that made you suck in a breath. You knew you were blushing before, but your face felt like an inferno now. As Jim turns to look at you with an apprehensive look, you didn’t know what your own face was projecting at this point. All you kept thinking was that scene, Jim towering over Michael and chasing him away. Jim and his big body and big hands and-

A hand was being waved in your face and you jumped, widening your eyes further and drawing your gaze upward to meet with Jim. He was smiling, laughing it seemed, and finally crossed his arms. “I seemed to lose you there for a second, you alright?”

“Yeah- yes, I’m fine.” You could hear the breathless tone to your voice and cursed inwardly, turning to quickly grab your cup of coffee and drain the rest of what was in the cup. Jim raised his eyebrows at this, laughing again as you place your mug into the sink and grab the second one.

“No, but really, are you okay? Michael has some pretty shitty timing.” Timing, right. You were talking to him about something. What were you talking about? You met Jim’s gaze again and took another drink, hoping to buy time. He only laughs, reaching for his own cup and mirroring you, taking his own sip. His eyes dart briefly down to his cup before raising back to you, something in him softening at the taste.

“I’m fine. Really. Thank you for that, by the way.”

“Of course,” Jim answers right away, smiling and holding his mug close to his chest. “If only I had been here the rest of the day, I would’ve been able to help out before it got too bad.”

“You know,” You were surprised you finally were able to find your voice, taking another drink from your coffee just to keep him in suspense. “I’m now wondering if he ran to his office to start looking up tall jokes now.” Jim groaned playfully, rolling his eyes and leaning a hip against the counter. “‘How’s the weather up there?’ And whatnot, you know?”

“Oh, I know, “ Jim insists, causing you to bubble up with laughter once more. “I think his most recent one was, ‘What’s the difference between a clown and a tall person?’” You raise your eyebrows, taking a drink from your coffee. He smirks, continuing on, “Their shoe store.” You huff a smile laugh, shaking your head.

“That’s horrible.”

“I didn’t mind it that much,” Jim replies with a shrug, watching your face. You wonder why you’re being scrutinized so closely, until he finishes his sentence, “I mean, you know what they say about big feet.” You choke on your coffee, turning and coughing away from Jim. Your eyes were wide, running that sentence through your head. You could swear that you’ve never blushed this often in your entire life, and yet your face heats up once more to its familiar warmth and you aren’t sure what you’re supposed to do with your hands. Placing your now empty second mug into the sink, you take hold of your last one and fake salute toward Jim.

“Alright! And with that, I am off!” You hear Jim laughing loudly behind you, shaking your head and pressing the back of your hand to your cheek. You turn and call back into the room, “To do work! Like we’re supposed to be doing!” The door closes on Jim’s laughter, and you hurry to make it back to your desk. No one seems bothered by your commotion aside from Pam, who just looks at you with a smile and a head tilt. You just shake your head in response, finding refuge at your desk.

“So, drinks tonight?”

“Yeah, drinks sound great!”

“Are we going to-”

“Of course!”

“Hey, Y/N!” You turn your head at your name, eyeing the group of coworkers congregating at the glass doors as they all take turns putting on their jackets. It was Phyllis who called your name, and you tried to turn your brain back on enough to pay attention. After all, work is over now, you shouldn’t need to use your brain anymore. That just sounded exhausting.

“Yeah?”

“Are you coming?” At that you tilt your head, and Phyllis smiles at you kindly, “Everyone is going out for drinks.”

“Oh,” You consider it, looking at the group of them before nodding, your smile growing. “Sure! That sounds fun!”

“Nope!” You jump at the loud sound of Michael’s voice, turning to look at him with wide eyes. He approaches you and hunches down to look you in the eye- completely unnecessarily. “You can’t come!” He stands again, holding a hand above your head, “You must be this tall to ride this ride! Sorry, gotta be this tall to have a drink with the lads!” He laughs loudly, turning to usher everyone out of the building. You stand there gaping, then turn to look at Phyllis, who in turn looked horrified.

“Oh, Y/N, that was-” She huffs, “You’re still allowed to come you know.”

“No, that’s okay Phyllis,” You began, sighing and glaring at the back of Michael’s head. “I don’t think I’d have much fun with him around anyway.”

“Well, since you’re free,” You startle again, huffing when you turn around and come face-to-face with Jim. Well, face-to-chest, but you’re not here to make fun of your own height.

“Jim! You scared me.” You playfully glare at him, finishing up packing up your desk. Phyllis, unnoticed, smiled at the two of you before leaving.

“As I was saying,” Jim continues, circling around to stand right next to you. You raise your eyes to him once more, raising an unimpressed eyebrow. When he takes your hand, your eyebrow immediately falls, and you drop your gaze to look at the sight of his fingers mixing with yours. “Since you’re free tonight, maybe we could go get a drink ourselves?” You raise your surprised gaze to Jim, unsure what to say as he finally continues in a lowered and deeper voice, “Just us?”

“Jim,” You begin, his name more of an exhale than really spoken, “What are you- like a date?”

“I know our size difference is so vast,” Jim playfully insists, pulling your hand twice with his own before tangling your fingers together, “But somehow I think we can push past it.”

“So, a-”

“Yes, a date,” Jim clears up with a laugh, reaching his other hand to place against your cheek. “I promise I won’t take you to a giant’s bar.” You laugh, shaking your head.

“I better be able to fit on the stools.” His smile widens, using your hands to pull you in closer.

“Is that a-”

“That’s a yes, yeah,” You agreed easily, attempting to stand on your toes to reach up toward him. Luckily, at the same moment, Jim leaned down and your lips finally met. Jim’s hand slides from your cheek to the back of your head, pulling you in closer and you couldn’t help but melt against him. When your kiss finally breaks and he straightens back up, you pout up at him. He chuckles, shaking his head with a soft look.

“A kiss like that and all I get is a pout? I must be off my game.” You laugh, playfully hitting his chest before huffing.

“Not that, the kiss was amazing. It’s just,” You playfully glare up at him, taking hold of his tie, “You’re too tall. I can’t just surprise you with a kiss, you have to lean all the way down here just for it to happen!” Jim laughs, sliding his head from the back of your head down to your back while you spoke and pulling you in closer.

“Well, that just sounds like quitters talk.”

“You’re on then, Halpert.” So, maybe today wasn’t the worst day.

[xo-cori]

it’s all a game to me anyway (II)

pairing: abby anderson x fem!reader

summary: pining after athletes is never a good idea. that is, unless you’re good at getting what you want.

warnings: smut (MDNI), choking if you squint, praise kink, jesse being an ally

a/n: y’alllll this is ass but i got sm requests for a part 2. also @feelsoseencantdream wanted me to tag them so i’m thinking of making a taglist??? lmk if you wanna be added 😈 ALSO PSA!!! don’t sleep w anybody if you aren’t 100% sure that they’re CLEAN ok thx

The very next day, you follow your usual routine. Daydream through all of your classes until you can finally start your venture towards the sports building, phone on silent with one headphone in your ear. However, the thrumming of your heart only drowns out the music, and it’s an unfamiliar feeling; the way your nerves are getting the best of you, the way you can only hope to be the one in charge here.

But, your nerves turn out to be right.

When you open the door to the rink that is usually filled with people at this time of day, you’re surprised to see that Abby is sitting there alone on the first bleacher. She doesn’t have on her usual hockey get-up; rather, she wears a grey hoodie and sweatpants, which tells you that she isn’t here to practice. Instead, she repeatedly runs a sharpener over the blade of one of her skates.

“Looking for someone?” She wonders, not even sparing a glance in your direction.

You cross your arms, opting to ignore her question and spare yourself the embarrassment. “No practice today?”

“Got cancelled. Coach’s daughter has a stomach bug,” she huffs, “besides, I think we all could use a day off.”

“Oh.” You reply, a small amount of anxiety creeping its way into your body. You step forward to take a seat a few inches away from her. “But you came here anyways? Why?”

Abby finally looks up from her skate and raises an eyebrow at you. “Why did you?”

This is a dynamic you aren’t used to. Being questioned like this without having anything snarky to say in response; it’s almost like Abby has the ability to steal the words from your mouth before you can even come up with them. “You know why.” You say.

She gestures to the empty rink. “No, not really. I figured you’d leave once you realized that there’s no one here to watch.”

“I’m here because you started something without finishing it.” You tell her, sternly, but it only makes her smile in amusement.

“Without finishing you, you mean.” She points out. “There’s cameras here. You, of all people, should know that.”

“We’ll go to the locker room again,” you reach out to grab her hand. “We can–”

“No.” Abby shuts you down immediately, though she doesn’t retract her hand from your grip. She lets you run your thumbs over her calloused palm and pretends not to notice the way it makes goosebumps rise across her arms; chalks it up to how damn cold it is in there. “Give me your phone.”

You tilt your head, confused, but you do what she says with a bit of hesitance. She takes your phone and goes to your contacts, adding her own number and name before giving it back to you. “I have to go. Text me your dorm number.”

Then, she stands up without another word and heads toward the door, leaving you in the same position you’d found yourself in the night before; this time, though, there’s hope. There’s an implication that she’ll finish what she started after all. You make sure to leave out the back door.

“Dina!” You call as you unlock the door to your room, seeing your roommate perk up from the couch. As per usual, her boyfriend, Jesse is laying with his feet kicked up on the armrest and his head in her lap.

She smiles when she sees you, quickly grabbing the remote to pause their movie. “What’s up, babe? You look like you just ran a marathon.”

A cheesy smile makes its way onto your face. “Literally nothing is wrong right now, because guess who’s coming over.”

Dina thinks for a moment, nose scrunched in concentration seeing as there’s lots of possibilities. But, the fact that she’s never seen you this excited about a girl before is enough of a hint as to who the lucky lady is. She pushes Jesse off of her and shoots up from her seat. “Abby?! No fucking way!”

You nod excitedly. “Yes fucking way! I don’t know when, or why, but–”

“Wait, since when is she into girls? Wasn’t she just with Owen?” Dina puts a hand on her hip, obviously just as confused as you.

“They broke up, but… if I was with Owen, I’d probably switch sides, too.” You shrug. “Either way, she’s coming tonight.”

“Which Abby?” Jesse asks, sitting up on the couch to look at you. “You’re acting all lovey-dovey, so I’m gonna assume she’s a good catch.”

You roll your eyes. “Come on, you know which Abby. Abby Anderson, captain of the hockey team? Six feet of pure muscle?”

Suddenly, Jesse seems just as invested in this conversation as you and Dina. “Jesus Christ, how’d you pull her?” He jokes, though you know it’s a genuine question– anybody involved in your university’s gossip knows that Abby hates hook-ups, and anyone who shoots their shot with her usually just makes a fool of themselves. Not you, though. You aren’t sure why but you’re hoping to find out.

“I don’t know! I’m so nervous. Why am I so nervous?” You place a hand over your rapidly beating heart.

Dina strolls over to you and grabs your shoulder. “Because you’ve been trying to scoop her up for, like, three months now. It’s weird to see you all amped up, but I don’t blame you, honestly. She’s intimidating and hot.”

“I’m literally sitting right here,” Jesse reminds her.

“Not for long, hopefully.” You look up at Dina. “You guys can do me a solid and finish your movie at Jesse’s place, right? Please?”

“Two steps ahead of you, sugar. I’m not waiting around for Anderson to show up. She’s… well, like I said, she’s intimidating.” Dina grabs Jesse’s car keys from the kitchen counter, which is Jesse’s cue to finally get off of the couch.

“Agreed,” he shakes his head, “I’ve seen her on that rink once and I can tell she’s not to be fucked with.”

You let out a sigh, relieved that this last-minute arrangement is already going smoothly. “Oh my god, thank you,” you say as Dina places her hands on your shoulders so that she can look into your eyes.

“Don’t have too much fun, you hear me? The last thing we need is a noise complaint.” She instructs you, then leans in to give you a peck on the forehead. “See you tomorrow morning?”

“Yeah, yeah, I hear you.” You grumble under your breath. Jesse waves a goodbye before they both head to the door, opening it and promptly freezing.

You lean forward to see that Abby is already standing right there.

“Oh. Hey,” Dina says, “uh, we were just leaving.”

Jesse smiles awkwardly while Dina grabs his wrist and ushers him out the door. Abby steps inside, head tilted over her shoulder to watch the couple speed-walk down the hallway before she shuts the door. “You seriously shoo’d your roommate away?”

“No,” you lie, “they… she was already going to his place tonight.”

She just stares at you, obviously not buying it. “Something tells me that isn’t true.”

You cross your arms. “Whatever. Why did you come here, anyways?”

Abby sighs as she walks forward and glances around, not yet directly toward you, almost like she’s surveying the area. As she gets closer, you catch a whiff of the familiar scent of her shampoo; pine and vanilla, already clouding your senses with desire. Your need for her has become primal. It’s something deep inside of you that has no beginning or end, no rhyme and no reason. “You don’t really need me to answer that question, do you?” She scoffs. “I thought I made it pretty clear.”

You look down at your feet. “Still would be nice to hear you say it.”

With the distance between you down to only a couple of inches, Abby’s standing in front of you in no time, her undivided attention now completely on you. You feel so small, and you kind of like it.

“What do you want me to say?” She shrugs. This time, though, there’s no underlying mockery in her voice. It’s a genuine question that gives you a sense of security. You gaze into her ocean blue eyes, cursing yourself for the way it makes your heart skip a beat.

“Maybe that I didn’t make myself look dumb yesterday when I told you how much I wanted you,” you answer, “and that you feel the same way.”

Abby tilts her head. “So, you expect me to say that I want you?”

“Kind of.” You mumble.

“Hm,” she leans back a bit, seemingly deep in thought for a moment (though her eyes don’t leave yours once). “My ego’s a little too big for that, but I’d rather just show you.”

You’re given no time to reply before you find yourself in the same position as the night before, with Abby grabbing hold of your waist and lifting you up to sit you down on the kitchen table. You spread your legs so she can stand between them as her lips finally meet yours, the show of strength making you melt beneath her.

This kiss is nothing like the last; carnal, sure, but there’s a hunger inside it and a strange sense of urgency, as if the world is ending and she needs to have you now. Her tongue effortlessly slides against yours and, unlike last time, there’s no battle for dominance. You submit to her without hesitation.

Abby, on the other hand– you’d have no idea how hard she’s trying to keep it together. You’re not exactly the type of person she could see herself falling for. She has a reputation to upkeep, which just so happens to be the complete opposite of yours. If anybody were to even speak both of your names in the same sentence, it could ruin her, leave her image tarnished while you move onto the next girl.

That doesn’t stop her, though. Now that she knows how it feels to kiss you, to touch you, to hear you beg for more, she doesn’t think anything could stop her.

You reach down to grab hold of her wrist, guiding her hand up to its rightful spot on your throat, and she wastes no time pressing her fingers down on the sides of your neck. Your mouth falls open with a gasp, thighs tightening around her waist. She rears back to look at you. “So fucking demanding.” She laughs.

“Just want you to touch me,” you huff out, voice low and shaky. “You left me hanging, Abby.”

“Because I wasn’t gonna fuck you in a locker room.” She says.

You smile, a mischievous glimmer in your half-lidded eyes. “But you’ll fuck me here?”

Abby smiles, too. “That’s the plan.”

She reaches down to the bottom of your sweater to pull it up over your head, throwing it behind her on the floor somewhere. It suddenly becomes very obvious that you’d been counting on getting lucky– you didn’t even bother putting on a bra.

Her eyes fall onto your chest and she stares shamelessly. “Really?”

Instead of responding, this time, you grab her wrists again and use the leverage to place her hands over both of your breasts. Even in the dim light of the kitchen, you can still see the way her pupils dilate once her palms meet your soft skin. She gently squeezes down, just once to test the waters, but you can tell from that action alone just how inexperienced she is with other women.

You place your hands over hers, making her squeeze again. Her breathing becomes heavy and her eyes become curious. She watches the way your skin moves between her fingers, beckoning her to explore.

Abby moves down to your neck, pressing hot kisses all over the marks she’d made the night before, licking over each bite mark that had already began to fade. You hadn’t even tried to cover them up. This only means something to her because she’d seen you walking around campus in those low-cut tank tops, a concoction of makeup smothered over your neck to cover just a few hickies, though they’d remain visible to a trained eye.

She bends down to slip one of your nipples into her mouth, suckling and drooling as you let out soft whimpers of approval. You bring a hand to grip the edge of the table whilst the other snakes up to the back of her head, beneath her long braid so you can tug at the roots of her hair. Each time your fingernails scratch at her scalp, she lets out a quiet moan, sending the most intoxicating vibrations right between your legs. From this new position, Abby can feel the growing warmth pressed against her abdomen, even more so when you subconsciously roll your hips into her. You’d do anything for some friction, and you already know that she’d let you.

After a few moments, you use the leverage you have on her head to pull her off of your chest, making her look up at you with those wanting eyes of hers. “Get down,” you hum, pulling her down by the hair so that her cheek is pressed into your thigh. “It’s like I told you yesterday– you know what I want.”

Now it’s Abby’s turn to find herself lost for words. Maybe it’s the way you’re looking down at her, or maybe the fact that she can already smell you and it’s making her mouth water.

Her hands drag down your waist until they find the waistband of your shorts, hooking her fingers into it so she can pull them down. Too slowly for your taste, but you’d never blame somebody for wanting to take their time with you. Your raise your hips from the table so that she can finally pull the last piece of clothing from your body, letting it fall past your ankles as she gets down onto her knees. “Oh, fuck me,” she mumbles mostly to herself.

She’d never need another confidence boost after this. Abby’s been in your apartment for maybe ten minutes, and you’re already soaked down to your thighs.

As a cue for her to get a move on, you lay your right leg onto her shoulder and tighten your grip in her hair. It’s a wordless gesture that tells her everything she needs to know.

The moan that leaves your mouth when she finally dives in is nothing less than pathetic.

What she lacks in experience, she makes up for in enthusiasm. She tries to recall what makes her feel good; tracing certain shapes with her tongue, licking you up and down until you’re practically gushing into her mouth. She swallows every last drop as she eats you like a woman starved.

Her hands grab onto your thighs, keeping them closed around her head. She’d never admit it, of course, but the way you tremble beneath her hands only riles her up more. Her lips wrap around your clit and she whimpers when she feels all ten of your fingers grab onto her hair, keeping her trapped right there despite the fact that she could easily break free if she wanted to. You revel in that power– knowing just how strong she is, knowing that she chooses to let you be stronger.

The heels of your feet dig into her shoulder blades as her strong hands do their best to hold you in place. Sparks of pleasure catch fire in your belly, the first tell that you aren’t going to last long. “Slow down,” you cry, but the sound of your voice all needy and soft just sends Abby into overdrive.

Her tongue attacks your clit, overwhelming you with the focused stimulation, causing your back to arch closer to her. Your head falls back as your eyes shut tightly, mindlessly whimpering and whining. She can feel your muscles tensing, trembling, like you don’t quite know what to do with yourself, and finds herself wondering how many other girls have had you in this same position. How many other girls have thought they’re the only one to make you feel this good, to make you bend to their every whim like this.

In your mind, though, you can only think of one thing; this odd feeling that Abby has awakened inside of you. A desire to be savored rather than devoured. She licks you up like you’re the last drop of water on Earth and you can’t even find it in yourself to mock her for it. There’s another feeling, a more physical one, quickly approaching. Embarrassingly quick, might you add.

Your hips jerk when you feel one of Abby’s fingers gently slip into you, exploring your warm, soft walls that clench around her so graciously. The arch in your back makes it easier to find that gummy spot which she wastes no time stroking with the rough pad of her finger. “How– f-fuck, how do you know all this?” You whine.

“Read some articles,” she mumbles right into you, sending waves of pleasure up your spine.

You let out a short-lived laugh at the thought of Abby fucking Anderson doing research on how to pleasure you properly. You can’t imagine any of her boyfriends had shown her how to take care of a woman, though, so it was only a matter of time– if it wasn’t for you, it would most likely be for herself. “Good girl,” you sigh, “I’m so close… oh, shit.”

The praise makes Abby moan into you as her dark blue eyes look up from between your legs to appreciate the sight. Your thighs are pressing against her rosy cheeks no matter how hard she tries to keep them open, your eyes struggling to stay open, your chest heaving up and down as you try (and fail) to preserve some stability in your breath.

Finally, that feeling in your belly reaches its peak when a second finger joins the first. Your head falls back and you put a hand over your mouth to muffle a quiet scream.

You make a point of not telling her, or even asking for permission, seeing as your trust had already been destroyed by her in this department the night before.

She seems to be in a very different mood tonight, though, because she doesn’t let up even after the tremors had stopped and the pleasure turns to pain; the good kind, where it’s all too much and there’s nothing you can do about it. You press your heel into her shoulder, pushing against the muscle there so she’d finally detach from you. A small gasp leaves your lips when she slowly pulls out her pruned fingers and looks up at you. The lower half of her face is completely covered in your cum, a sight you’re sure will be forever etched into your mind. How could you go back to normal after this? How could you pretend that anyone else compares?

You grab her jaw and bring her back up to your level, messily smashing your lips to hers as you hold onto her shoulder with your other hand. Much to her dismay, though, you’re quick to pull back.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you’ve done that before, Anderson.” You say, albeit breathless.

“If you knew any better, you wouldn’t have let me do that.” She replies. You laugh, but you know she’s right, and you know she’s serious.

“But you liked it,” you implore, clearly searching for some sort of validation, which she quickly grants you in the form of a toothy smile; a genuine one that she just can’t wipe away.

“Maybe. How long do we have until your roommate gets back?” Her clammy hands come down to your waist, kneading the fat of your hips.

You raise an eyebrow. “Long enough. Why? You want a taste of your own medicine?”

The question is enough to visibly light up her eyes. “Yeah. Yeah, I do,” she confirms with a shy voice like she didn’t just give you the best orgasm of your life in under fifteen minutes. She’s sure her boxers are soaked right through the fabric, and honestly, she’s starting to think only you could bring the release she craves.

“Say no less. You gotta carry me, though,” you huff as you wrap your trembling thighs around her waist. “I can’t feel my legs.”

[chrissv4mp]

nsfw alphabet, olivia rodrigo

warnings: smut (if it wasn't already obvious), degradation kink, praise kink, fingering, oral, other suggestive topics...

author's note: GUYSSS i love olivia sm and was super excited to write this when i got a request AHH

(sorry for not posting😞😞 been a little busy these past few days)

_____________

A = aftercare, (what they're like after sex)

literally the aftercare QUEEN. every time you guys are finally settled down, liv runs a warm bath/shower and is just SO, so gentle when she helps you into the bathroom.

she helps you wash your body and scrubs your hair since she knows you always get tired after sex.

B = body part, (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

her favorite body part of herself is definitely her hands/fingers. she just loves how you fall apart whenever she's knuckles deep inside of you and gets to watch you squirm underneath her.

her favorite body part of yours is your eyes. she adores watching them roll to the back of your head as she has you wrapped around her fingers (literally!!).

C = cum, (anything to do with cum, basically!)

olivia LOVES spreading her fingers out whenever she pulls them out of you just to watch your cum stick to them.

doesn't even waste a second before her fingers are in your mouth or her own, licking all your juices off her fingers. she thinks it's super hot (and it is!).

D = dirty secret, (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

not much of a secret, but she has the biggest breeding kink & just fantasizes about how beautiful you'd look carrying her baby. (even if it isn't scientifically impossible...)

E = experience, (how experienced are they? fo they know what they’re doing?)

i think she's pretty experienced since she's had past relationships & she's definitely a freak !!

F = favorite position, (this goes without saying...)

loves having you in missionary whenever her strap is buried deep inside of you, adores your little noises and how she can just shut you up with a kiss if you're being too loud.

liv never wastes the chance to get on her knees for you whenever she's needy, will literally drop to her knees on a hardwood floor just to beg you to fuck her.

G = goofy, (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i honestly don't think she's very goofy in bed, she really just likes to be more serious and like dominant.

H = hair, (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

i think (since her armpits, hair, etc. are normally clean) she's hairless down there, she just thinks it's easier to work around (plus she loves whenever you get a nice view of her pussy while she teases you.)

if you have hair down there, she doesn't mind !!

I = intimacy, (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect.)

shes the most romantic person ever during sex, (more so after..) will praise you whenever you finish/when you've been good that day.

loves whispering little praises into your core as she eats you out.

J = jack off, (masturbation headcanon)

used to masturbate a little before she got with you, but now whenever she's like turned on she'll go straight to you since she knows you can't resist her.

if you're not in the mood, though, she respects you and goes off to relieve herself !

K = kink, (one or more of their kinks)

even though olivia adores praising you, she goes absolutely crazy whenever she gets the chance to degrade you, calling you her little slut.

she has the biggest breeding kink !! (as i said earlier) always tells you whenever her strap is buried in you, "'m gonna fuck a baby into you, you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

L = location, (favorite places to do the do)

she's a very simple woman, loves fucking you in her bed or in the shower.

olivia loves hearing your moans echo off the bathroom walls as she fucks you dumb.

M = motivation, (what turns them on, gets them going)

gets really turned-on whenever you wear short skirts or just any article of clothing that's revealing.

whenever you get all touchy with her, she gets especially horny.

N = no, (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

would never be open to piss-play or period play, hates the idea of blood and just like literal pee on her body or in her mouth.

O = oral, (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

she doesn't mind receiving, she loves it, but she favors whenever she gets to be the one giving.

is the biggest sucker for tasting you directly from your pussy.

P = pace, (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

depends on her mood/the day. if the day went well, then she's very sensual and takes her time with you, praising you every second.

if she's mad or had a bad day, though... you better believe she's dragging you to bedroom and fucking you into the mattress so rough you'd have a problem walking for a few days.

Q = quickie, (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

doesn't love quickies because she likes to take her time with you, but doesn't exactly hate them.

she wouldn't mind taking you in a family bathroom if you're needy at the grocery store!

R = risks, (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

shes not the girl to turn down something because she's a little scared, she's always open to trying new things with you!

S = stamina, (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

she can't go like an insane amount of rounds, but she can go at least 2-3.

if she's super needy and whiny, she won't even last a few minutes.

T = toys, (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

i don't think she owns like a bunch of toys, but she definitely has a few vibrators and a strap.

she's a freak, guys, she owns a blindfold!

U = unfair, (how much they like to tease)

omg, she finds it so fun to just tease the ever living shit out of you until you're begging for her with tears in your eyes.

she's a nice girl, she really is, it's just your teary eyes and whiny little pleas that get her going.

V = vocal, (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

she's loud. like, really loud. she whines and begs for you, and when you finally give her the relief she's been wanting, she can't help but fall apart for you.

definitely whimpers whenever she's close, muttering little "please, baby. lemme cum, need to cum so fucking bad.."

W = wild card, (a random headcanon for the character)

guys, like i said before.... she's a freak!!

one time at a party she might've been so turned-on by your outfit she fucked you in a photobooth???👀

X = x-ray, (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

got a feeling she has some muscles but not like an insane amount. she has abs and her biceps do come up a little when she's trying to open something (like a can) or grip it really hard.

Y = yearning, (how high is their sex drive?)

i think she has a high sex drive because of how good she thinks you look all the time, and mainly just because of you!

Z = zzz, (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

she wouldn't pass out immediately after sex, and she wouldn't be extremely energetic either.

she'd be like a little tired but also energized enough to run you both a warm bath and clean you up. but, when she falls into bed after the bath... she's out like a light in your arms.

. . .

[mochinomnoms]

A Floral Inconvenience

You came into Twisted Wonderland with nothing but the clothes on your back, a literally fiery cat, and an immune system not conditioned to handle the foreign antibodies in the air, earth, or water. It was honestly a miracle that you hadn’t caught some sort of incurable disease, probably because most diseases here required magical output to survive, like plants and water. You weren’t immune to your own feelings though, and magical disease and illnesses have a funny way of adapting themselves to their potential host. It was then that you found yourself prepared for springtime hay fever and allergies, after all pollen was pollen no matter where you were at. What was unexpected, and thus not prepared for, was the disease known as hanahaki, or the flower sickness. Long ago, there existed a family of mages that lived in a small mountain village deep within a jungle that was established by a family of mages. The family protected their village with fantastical and magical abilities, each unique and extraordinary as generation from generation grew. One of those mages, the Flower Bride, had the ability to grow a magnificent array of flora with just the wave of her hand! Flor de mayo, jacarandas, figs and vines all made their home with the Flower Bride. She had a heart so full of feelings, love for her home, family, and her beloved, of course, that her very emotions affected how dazzling those blooms were. The Flower Bride then decided that others should be able to demonstrate their love in the same beauteous display as she did: after all, who wouldn’t want their love developing into only the most lovely blooms? As such, hanahaki was born. Some see it was a blessing, a push, an opportunity for one to confront their feelings. It’s a realization that what they’re feeling is indeed true, the type of love that can only be achieved in fairytales. Others saw it as an inconvenience: after all, sometimes it just wasn’t the right time to confess your love, or they’d be coughing up petals mid-speech, kind of annoying honestly. Yet the sickness would continue until they acknowledge their feelings, the love died down, or it became a chronic illness. Officially dubbed hanahaki by researchers in the East, the disease was also referred to as the flower sickness, being twitterpated, and sometimes even the lovesick florae by the general population. The most commonly afflicted persons fit into two categories: the positively, without a doubt, enamored sort, the twitterpated or lovesick sort of folk. Or, they were the kind to bury their feelings deep deep down and just one day die. It wasn’t unique to any singular species either. It had adapted to afflict humans, beastmen, and even merfolk. Why, not even fae were immune despite their natural immunity to magical disease. Really, it shouldn’t have been any surprise that the emotionally stunted students of Night Raven College would be prime targets for their own bout of hanahaki.

An event to christen the creation of my blog! Please feel free to request or use for your own!

Requests Close 10/20/2023

Rules

Anyone can use this event and prompts on their own blog! Tag me in so I can read all your stories!

This event will be for TWST on my end, others are free to use for whatever they'd like!

All request will be up to 2000+ words, with a max of 3 characters per request.

Chose up one prompt for each character and indicate if you want romantic or platonic. You can also indicate if you want fluff, hurt/comfort, suggestive, etc.

No NSFW for this event (on my end at least, everyone else go nuts)

Reader will default to gender-neutral unless asked otherwise

Dialogue Prompts

“Why is your trash can full of flower petals? Are you secretly a botanist, or is there something you're not telling me?”

“So, I hear you've been coughing up daisies lately. Got any plans to enter the flower business?”

“You know you have it bad when you start sneezing petals every time your crush walks by. At least it's a colorful allergy!”

“I can't believe you're faking a cough just to get some attention. And you're using fake flowers for the petals? That's commitment!”

“I think the local florist is in love with me. Their shop is making a killing off my Hanahaki. Do you think they'll give me a discount?”

“You've got to stop sending secret admirer bouquets to yourself. The delivery guy is starting to think you have a dozen secret admirers.”

“I've heard of wearing your heart on your sleeve, but wearing petals in your hair is a whole new level of fashion statement.”

“I have a steady, loving partner. you on the other hand have a left hand and a sunflower cough.”

“Why'd I have to get a nose full of lilies? I'm allergic, this is so unfair.”

“You think with all the lavender on my head I could make my own syrup out of it?”

“No, I've been practicing my sleight of hand! Watch as I make a bouquet of tulips magically appear—ACK!”

“No, I haven't been growing marigolds out of my ass. Why would you even ask that?!”

“Here, your favorite flower! Hmm? Where'd I get them? Uh, I just found them, around…”

“I'd rather have the thorniest, pesticide ridden roses grow in my mouth before I'd ever admit having any sort of affection for them!”

“Sooo, are you gonna apologize for puking dahlias all over my breakfast?”

“I've never heard of a flower sickness, are you talking about seasonal allergies?”

“Look, even if confessing would let me get rid of the poppies, I'd rather not. Maybe I'll just learn how to make poppy seed muffins or something.”

“Is this normal here?” “Only for the emotionally unavailable folk.” “Ah, so it is.”

“Dude, are your freckles turning into baby's breath?” “AHH!”

“Aren't lotus flowers really good for your skin? Babeeey, I'm set for life—” “NOT WHEN THEY'RE GROWING OUT OF YOUR EARS!”

“Look, I care for you and want you to get laid, but imagine all the money we'd save on tea if you kept growing chamomile from your head.”

“Blehhhg…” “You know I always knew I'd be holding your hair back as you puked your stomach out at a party, I thought it be from the alcohol though, not flowers.”

“You know, some people pay a lot of money for Hanahaki bouquets, have you considered—OW! It was just a suggestion!”

“I'm so happy that you confessed first.” “Why?” “If I had to dig out another hydrangea petal from my teeth, I was gonna lose it.”

“Man, sunflowers have got to be the worst to be puking up.” “Nah man, it's roses and their thorns! They scrap up all up your gums, my dentist bill after was ridiculous!”

🌸 a floral inconvenience masterlist 🌸

gardenias & peonies: silver x f!reader – #13

stargazer lilies: sebek zigvolt x f!reader – #5

dahlias; zinnias & cosmos: ruggie bucchi, trey clover, [separate] x gn!reader - #15, #1

teonanácatl mushrooms: jade leech x gn!reader - #18

lavender roses: floyd leech x gn!reader - #14

lavender: azul ashengrotto x gn!reader - #18

marigold: vil schoenheit, platonic!ace trappola x gn!reader - #7 & #12

blue hydrangeas: idia shroud x f!reader - #24

baby's breath & red roses: riddle rosehearts x f!reader - #14 & #19 [QUEUED]

amaryllis: lilia vanrouge x gn!reader - #1 [PENDING]

carnations: leona kingscholar x gn!reader - #18 [PENDING]

asters; purple hydrangeas: ace trappola, jamil viper [spearate] x gn!reader - #22, #24 [PENDING]

gerbera daisies: trey clover x gn!reader - #3 [PENDING]

orange poppies & water lilies: azul ashengrotto x gn!reader - #17 [PENDING]

sunflowers: jack howl x gn!reader - #8 [PENDING]

chrysanthemums: jamil viper x gn! reader - #1 [PENDING]

green roses: malleus draconia x gn!reader - #13 & #14 [PENDING]

pink poppies & cala lilies: jamil viper x gn!reader - #17 & #22 [PENDING]

sunflowers: leona kingscholar x f!reader - #8 [PENDING]

BONUS:

azaleas, cornflowers, & white roses: ace trappola, deuce space [poly] x gn! reader - #6, #3, & #22 [PENDING]

[s1llysmut]

Can we get Velvette for the nsfw alphabet?

NSFW alphabet for Velvette

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Honestly she immediately passes out. It’s really cute when you lay beside her though because she subconsciously cuddles into you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Her favourite body part on herself is her hair if that counts. She loves expressing herself with it. On you her favourite body part is your ass, no matter your gender.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

She’s a squirter.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

She doesn’t really have any secrets from you. Well maybe the fact she’s designing lingerie specifically for you as a surprise.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

She knows a thing or two. She knows the basics. Besides, if she ever needs advice she just asks Valentino.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

She rides you. Or if you’re the one getting fucked it’s from behind.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

She’s a little goofy. More so attitude than silliness.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It’s the same colour/s as her hair. She doesn’t shave but she keeps it trimmed.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Not very romantic. She’s more kinky with sex than romantic.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

She uses all sorts of toys. She gets free ones from Valentino all the time.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

She likes being tied up and also tying you up. She likes being put in her place but also putting you in your place. She’s sadistic but also a masochist. She’s a switch if you couldn’t tell.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere she wants. She’s a lady who gets what she wants.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

If you’re in clothes that look really good on you. She’s a woman with fashion.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

She won’t involve anyone else in the bedroom. She’s way too protective of you for that shit.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

She prefers receiving. She loves to ride your face and tug at your hair.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

She has a need for speed.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

She’s a busy woman of course there’s gonna be quickies sometimes!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yes she’s game to take risks. Anything she finds interesting at least.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Around 3 or 4 rounds.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

She has tons of toys from Valentino. She uses them on herself and you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

A LOT of teasing. She’s a brat.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

She’s loud like really loud. She’s got nothing to be ashamed of in her opinion.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

She will make you taste your own cum.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Small tits and a medium sized ass.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Every few days.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Immediately. Literally immediately.

[rookiesbookies]

Hi i love the empress and male!concubines idea with the COD boys, I def think that it'll be interesting to see more hcs for this idea/au?

Alright my little anon. Truthfully I should have given more details in the og post (it also started as a rant about how I couldn’t handle a poly relationship because of my anxiety (I also saw a post about a girl who had 4 partners and didn’t get any attention and it made me sad so that's also way).) I have been stewing on this idea though so here’s some hc. Might do more if people are still interested in it or want more, I do love talking about my AUs (like this one and the Greek god one, so let me know if you want me to go more bc stuff like this rattles around my brain)

Also apparently there is a term for a male concubine and they’re called concubinatus or a concubinus. Honestly I took Latin and the fact I didn’t expect this lowkey brings me pain.

General HC?

The first empress in a long time. And the first empress to like her concubinuses (hope that's right) more than the idea of marrying for an emperor. So the council decided to bring you only the best warriors to keep. They of course still must serve occasionally but they have been elevated in status to there is lower risk anything will happen. Mostly kept as tacticians or kept to train the new boys joining the country’s military.

Konig and Krueger were taken as trophies of war for the Empress. They were two of the largest, smartest, and strongest men from the battlefield.

When the two were adjusting, it was difficult. The empress was gracious with them, mentioning how she wouldn’t dare make them do anything, apologizing for the war and the loss. Truthfully trying to get them comfortable, and the two were honestly shocked but I’ll get into that more in their sections.

Keegan was sent as a gift by a neighboring nation looking for peace and protection. He had a good time adjusting, sometimes making comments about how this treatment is too good for nasty military dogs like all of them but I’ll touch on that more later.

Price

Price was probably the first concubinus. He had been a strong warrior and was deemed by the council to be a good fit for what they were hoping for. He also, however, did not intend to retire from his position so they had to find an alternate reason to stop him from getting in trouble.

For him it was awkward. His empress was a bit younger than him, however he did crave to be a father. While the empress didn’t intend to fall pregnant yet, he would be on his best behavior when the opportunity came.

The chance to be the father of the next royal was something he couldn’t miss.

Soap

Both him and Gaz were best in their class, breaking records, so it only made sense it seems to send them to the empress once they got their prime years out of them.

He was probably the last concubinus to come in before the gift and the trophies of war. He has the more vicious puppy eyes. He waits for you like a dog every time you leave and enter. Always talks about how much more comfortable your bed is and how nice it is to lay with you. Definitely sweet talks you even though he’s already a concubinus.

Will literally do anything you say and it’s partially because he thinks he will get sent back to the military full time if he doesn’t.

Ghost

Definitely does checks on all the palace guards to make sure they’re up to spec. If even one slacks he uses his power to make them run.

This is all because of how gracious the empress has been with him. When he had a fit of ptsd (i'm thinking anxiety attack or something) she invited him into her room and away from the others so he didn’t feel embarrassed and comforted him as best she could before making him some tea. With an empire that stretches across Europe he was impressed she had the time to stop and care about a random concubinus.

Definitely was surprised he told you as much as he did and how you listened and comforted him. Telling him you’d never make him do anything he wasn’t comfortable with was something he appreciated.

Gaz

See the first paragraph of Soap’s bc Im not copying it again.

Since I feel like Gaz is the older of the two (he seems to have a maturity I dont see as much in Soap idk?) He was sent to her first of the two for his ‘semi-retirement’. Now they just need them to occasionally train incoming recruits.

He definitely enjoyed adjusting to the cushy life of the castle. He liked being able to keep his weapons since he did double as a personal guard for the empress. But he likes that he and the other concubinus get a hot tub more, definitely likes all the fancy clothes.

His job is the have sex with his sexy empress, what’s not to love?

Konig

Truthfully, when he was being cocky toward the other concubinus and you pulled him away into a separate room to tell him you knew he was compensating for his anxiety, he was more than shocked. He was stunned into silence.

So when you reached your hands under his hood and rubbed his cheeks, telling him it was ok and he didn’t need to act out, he melted. He had never truly been shown such softness, so to be shown it by the empress of the enemy? He was so conflicted. With a pat on his chest you told him he could take on his position fully when he was more comfortable and that you were concerned for him and there if he needed to talk. He was still quiet.

Krueger

Was not interested. No matter how many compliments you gave him or gifts you sent, he wouldn’t budge. He was grumpy and hostile. So much so he made the other concubinus nervous especially for you.

It wasn’t until you pulled him into your room that night that he relaxed quite a bit under your soft hands and apologies. Massaging his tired muscles, and lulling him into a sense of security. Now he understood how Konig folded so easily.

He offered to return the favor but you told him not until he was more comfortable and made him promise to play nice. He agreed but only to be a bit nicer.

Keegan

He honestly believes this treatment is too good for all of them. They were dogs of war, animals trained to kill, and now they’re dressed in fancy clothes? With an empress who dotes on them when they should be doting on her? Truthfully he baffles him. He isn’t ungrateful, he just didn’t expect to become a concubinus when sent here. He expected a joint military operation or to be a representative. He hit it off quickly with the group from the empire’s military.

The two from the war keep to themselves and the shorter one threatened to bite him.

Often feels the most out of place because he is the only one from his area, but he doesn’t complain. He gets nice gifts and is invited into your room pretty often, so he appreciates every moment. He wonders if it would be proper or allowed for him to get you gifts?

I was surprising more eager to write this ask than I thought. Let me know if yall want me to do formal parts to this? Maybe an actual fic for this au?

Masterlist is pinned on profile as always, don’t forget to leave me a comment or a request in my inbox to let me know what yall want to see!

[a-little-unsteddie]

stuck in your throat || 2.2

2.1 || [here] || 2.3 || 2.4

wee here’s the next part! i love robin and steve so much <3 their dynamic is literally the best. hope y’all enjoy <3

“Steve?” the omega heard Robin shout as she entered the shared apartment. He stood and groaned as pain shot up his body through his knees. He slipped his phone into his back pocket before he made his way to the living room.

“How was work?” he asked, leaning against the wall as Robin shed her outter layer.

“Ugh, I swear, if Diana comes in one more fucking time, I’m gonna climb over the counter and stab her with a spoon,” she seethed, toeing off her converse.

Steve snorted, rolling his eyes, “What’d she ask for this time?” he asked, having heard many tales of Diana’s stupidity.

“She asked me if we served fucking Frosty’s,” she hissed angrily, which only increased Steve’s amusement.

“You’re not We—”

“I know we’re not a fucking Wendy’s,” Robin huffed, stomping towards the kitchen, Steve following behind to listen to the rest of whatever happened. “She knows we’re not a fucking Wendy’s, but her reasoning was that we serve milkshakes, and, really, how different from a milkshake could a Frosty be?”

“Isn’t there a Wendy’s in the foodcourt?” Steve asked, scrunching his nose up in thought.

“Yes, yes, there is,” Robin hissed, “that crotchety woman knows that, too!”

Steve watched fondly as Robin ranted, knowing she needed to get it all out before she could let it go and move on with her day. He was content to wait her out, even as she moved on to rant about a different customer that had annoyed her. Usually the scent of pissed off alpha never failed to cause Steve to feel slightly sick, but something about Robin always put him at ease, even moments like these, where she was practically growling with rage.

Eventually, Robin calmed down enough to move on with her day and heaved a deep sigh.

“I’m sorry, I know you had your interview with Eddie today, so you probably didn’t want to hear about my shitty day.”

“This is one of my favorite rituals, don’t you dare take that from me,” Steve huffed, rolling his eyes as he crossed his arms.

“Either way, how did it go?” Robin asked eagerly, pouring some juice into a glass.

“I got the job!” Steve finally exclaimed, causing Robin to let out a sound that wasn’t dissimilar to a squeal, but if Steve were to mention it later, she would deny it.

“Stevie! That’s great!” she cheered, wrapping her arms around Steve and scented him, pressing her scent right against his cheeks so that he could smell just how excited she was for him.

“I know!!” he smiled mischievously, “I also may have gotten you an in for another position they’re hiring for,” he sing-songed, and she pulled back with wide eyes.

“Seriously? You better not be joking, dingus. I have been desperately avoiding thinking about you leaving without me,” she said rapidly, shaking him with every word she spoke.

“I asked Chrissy if there were any other positions open and luckily for us, she’s hiring an assistant and has only received two other applications!” Steve explained, watching as Robin’s grin got wider and wider. She pulled Steve’s face to hers and rubbed their cheeks together, scenting Steve again. Steve hummed as the scent of rain and lilacs filled his nose, unable to stop smiling.

“That’s so fucking lucky,” she said excitedly, pulling away. “Send me what I need to know.”

That night, Robin submitted her application to the job listing, and Steve could only hope that no one more qualified than her would apply, and that the two who already had applied were idiots who didn’t know shit and were unqualified.

By the following evening, Robin was officially hired, and therefore, signed an NDA. Which officially meant that Steve wouldn’t be breaking any rules by telling Robin absolutely everything.

It also meant Robin knew that he had been talking to and about Chrissy as in Cunningham, and Eddie as in Munson.

They were celebrating, obviously.

“You? Are going to be Eddie Munson’s nanny?” Robin asked, taking a sip of the seltzer she had. Steve laughed and nodded, knocking his head back as he took a large drink from his own seltzer.

“I dunno if he liked me, though,” he admitted with a slightly bitter laugh.

“What? From meeting him a total of one time?” she asked, eyebrows raised in expectation. At Steve’s silence, she sighed and continued. “It was a professional setting, maybe he was just uncomfortable with it. He’s always struck me as the type of celebrity to be down to earth and kind of unsettled by his celebrity status. Or, he was taking his pup to meet a stranger that even he hadn’t met yet. He was probably anxious, if he was a good dad.”

Steve gave the alpha a look, to which she just sighed in exasperation and rolled her eyes dramatically.

“Listen, I can be observant if I want to be,” she grumped at him, crossing her arms. “And I know you. You’re impossible to dislike. I tried, remember?”

Steve sighed and nodded gravely, “I do. A foolish endeavor on your part,” he said seriously.

“I know,” Robin agreed, nodding sagely, as if she had learned from the experience, when really it was just high school bullshit. They’ve been friends since Steve’s senior year in high school, when he’d presented as an omega in the middle of the year and subsequently fell to the bottom of the totem pole.

Sometimes, Steve found himself wondering if she had saved his life, back then. He couldn’t imagine being where he was without her.

“We need to pack,” Robin said sternly, as if she wasn’t the entire reason they had gotten distracted from the task originally.

“We do,” he agreed, gesturing to where he’d already finished packing one suitcase of clothing, and another laid open beside it.

They took time throughout the next couple of weeks to plan how they were getting out of their one year lease. They agreed that they’d let one or two of the kids take over their lease, seeing as they were all adults now and looking for their own place to live.

Will had come to mind first, so Steve had made arrangements with him to take over his half of the lease. Robin had decided to let Will decide who would sign her half. After they talked to him, Will told them he’d chosen Dustin to move in with.

Dustin had been thrilled, had been wanting to live on his own for a while now. Steve had witnessed the young beta realize that he’d be living with Will, and it was cute. He was a little flustered, but mostly excited.

Dustin had also pestered him to death about where they were going and just barely accepted that he’d signed an NDA as a reason to not talk about it. Will, of course, already knew, or had a good educated guess at the very least. He looked amused and smug at knowing the information, when Dustin didn’t, and didn’t give anything away. Steve was grateful for that, knowing exactly how the beta pup would’ve reacted.

Steve also knew that Dustin was unlikely to actually give up.

They were meeting with the landlord the following evening, to sign over the lease to both Will and Dustin. The two pups would move in once Steve and Robin left on the 17th of the month, which was rapidly approaching. Much quicker than Steve had anticipated.

Steve startled out of his thoughts as his phone began to incessantly buzz on the bedside table. He grabbed it and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw Chrissy’s name lighting up on his phone.

“Hello?” Steve answered, feeling his stomach twist. Robin looked at him in concern, mirroring his expression. Steve mouthed ‘Chrissy’ at her, and her eyes widened in apprehension.

“Steve! Hello! It’s Chrissy,” the woman spoke cheerfully, which alleviated some of his anxiety, but not all of it.

“Hi, Chrissy! What can I do for you?” he asked nervously, picking at the seam on the pair of sweats he was wearing.

“We discussed at some point that we would be responsible for your travel expenses. I was hoping that we could set up a time for the four of us—me, you, Eddie and Robin, that is—to meet and show you the available options.”

All of Steve’s anxiety fled his body, only to be replaced with confusion. “There are multiple options?” he clarified.

“Yes! When would you be available for a meeting to discuss them? I’m calling Robin after this to see her availability as well.” Chrissy explained cheerfully, which did nothing to help his confusion. Options? Plural?

“That won’t be necessary, she’s sitting across from me right now. Let me put you on speaker,” he said, waiting for Chrissy’s confirmation before doing so. “Repeat pretty much everything, Robin can hear you now.”

After she repeated herself, Robin also appeared to be a bit stumped, but relayed her availability nonetheless. Steve did so as well, and they were able to quickly figure out a time that worked for everyone.

“Alright, well, that’s everything today. Do you have any questions for me?” Chrissy asked, as she always did at the end of their calls.

Steve bit his lip, hesitating only a moment before asking, “Will Elodie be joining us?” in a tone of voice that he hoped didn’t betray how much he wanted the pup to be there.

Chrissy made a humming noise as Robin muffled a laugh into one of his shirts. Steve huffed quietly and threw another one of his shirts at her in an attempt to get her to stop laughing at him. So, what if he was already kind if attached to the pup? Was that so bad?

“No, it looks like she’s spending that day with her grandpa, sorry,” Chrissy responded after a few beats of silence.

“That’s fine, I was just curious,” Steve said quickly.

After confirming the day and time of their meeting, the call ended. Steve studiously avoided Robin’s gaze as he focused on getting together some of the smaller items that took up space in his nest.

“Disappointed you won’t be seeing your pup?” Robin teased gently, grinning as Steve flushed red. He whined at her, pouting.

“She’s not my pup! I just wanted to know what to expect,” he sniffed, still not looking at the alpha. Robin hummed disbelievingly, laughing as Steve’s pouting glare only intensified at her teasing.

“Right, okay, sure, I believe that,” she said in a way that let Steve know exactly how much she didn’t believe him. Steve stuck his tongue out at her, and returned to the task at hand, packing away most of his shit.

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[whoopssteddiefeels]

Penny in the Air

Robin is a lot of things: judgey, hyperactive, anxious, impulsive, talkative, loud- there’s a list okay, and she’s very familiar with it. High up the list is that she is very, very gay (if possible, she’s pretty sure she’s actually getting gayer. She blames Steve for this, as she’s pretty sure it has to do with being able to finally talk about her crushes to someone other than her reflection.)

The point is, she’s gay, so she’s not surprised that she notices first. The Steve-Eddie thing. Because it is, in fact, a thing at this point.

She knows Eddie is gay- knows it like the sky is blue and David Bowie rocks- because of, y’know, the way he is (if she had any doubt, the way he leaned in while calling Steve “big boy”, ew, killed it dead.) Her research suggests this is “gaydar,” but its very unfair, she thinks, that so far it has only detected exactly (2) gays, both men, making it pretty much useless. It has given her exactly 0 information on Vickie.

She empathizes with Eddie’s position. Feels it pang under her sternum when his eyes go soft watching Steve talk emphatically, hair flopping around in that ridiculous way it does. Knows how it must catch in his throat when his hand suddenly retracts halfway to Steve’s shoulder, going to his own hair to cover the aborted movement. Tries hard to not over-identify with the sharp tug he gives there, trying to snap himself out of it (fails because she did literally exactly that when Vickie was in the video store the previous day, almost as if he had seen and copied the mechanism).

The part of the puzzle she can’t figure out is Steve. She’s annoyingly aware that he likes (groan) boobies, thanks Fast Times, and he isn’t treating Eddie like a girl whose number he’s trying to score. That being said, whenever the older boy appears, Steve lights up like a damn Christmas tree. Affection doesn’t have to be romantic; she knows this- wants to hit several of the kiddos over the head with it whenever they allude to her dating Steve- but empathy for Eddie is tinting her judgement, and once you put on the gay rose-tinted glasses it’s hard to unsee the possibility. It certainly seems like flirting. Rearranging his hair every three seconds, drawing Eddie’s eyes to the mane that is his pride and joy. Getting what she can only describe as unnecessarily close when he squeezes by Eddie in the video store aisles or whoever’s living room they’re sprawled in, hands brushing a shoulder, back, or one time his hip under the pretense of maintaining balance. The soft blush whenever Eddie flirts hard in a way he knows can be passed off as a joke. The honest megawatt smile Steve gets whenever Eddie starts in on his usual antics is infinitely more endearing than the smolder he’s learned to use like a weapon.

She usually knows exactly what Steve is thinking or feeling before he does. They’ve got that whole platonic soul mate telepathy thing, and he’s easily the center of her social world. So, since she can’t tell what he’s thinking (other than the obvious but unhelpful “Eddie, yay!”), she’s 99.9% sure, from experience, ok, that it means he isn’t thinking. Like at all. So, what she’s witnessing is instinctive, his body just moving into Eddie’s space because it feels correct, and he hasn’t paused to think about it.

             He’s walking that line of comfortable and affectionate that is ambiguously intimate. Could be platonic, could be more. It would be frustrating for anyone with a crush, but she knows from bitter experience with straight-girl crushes that Eddie must be going insane. And yes, Robin and Eddie are friends, but not close enough for her to open a conversation with “So you’re obviously gay and into Steve, my best friend who I talk to every second of every day, and no he hasn’t mentioned it, and neither have I. What’s up with that?” Similarly, she can’t quite figure out how to bring it up to Steve without accidentally outing Eddie in the process.

That’s the main reason she’s keeping her mouth uncharacteristically shut on the subject. She is not, however, above the occasional raised eyebrow, ok, especially as Eddie’s flirting slowly becomes ridiculously obvious. The man is literally leaning on the counter, chin on his hand, mooning up at Steve through his eyelashes. Steve has his hip propped on the opposite side, leaning into the shared space. How are either of them this oblivious, seriously.

~*~

She’s there when the penny finally drops.

They’re not even watching a romantic movie, it’s fucking Life of Brian, all three of them calling out their favorite lines along with the actors, throwing things and generally goofing off. If she takes the armchair to force the boys together on the couch, she doesn’t think anyone can blame her. If she’s feeling a little smug that they both sit in the middle, right next to each other, instead of taking opposite ends, she keeps it to herself. She might not want to stick her foot right in the middle of that mess, but she’s not above setting booby traps.

Robin couldn’t tell you exactly when Steve’s arm went around Eddie’s shoulder; it was somewhere between Eddie practically climbing into Steve’s lap for a “Biggus Dickus” re-enactment, the closeness and flirting safely enveloped in humor, and Steve attempting to force Eddie to “haggle” for the bag of chips. When she glances over from the safety of her armchair, Steve’s arm is trapped behind Eddie’s head, draped over his shoulder on the opposite side. Eddie, usually a constant ball of fidgety motion, is frozen stiff like he’s trying not to scare off a nervous rabbit. Even in the blue light coming off the screen she can see the flush coloring his usually nocturnal-pale cheeks.

The thing is, Steve had just discussed this move with her. Told her to invite Vickie to movie night, recommended light, easily joked off roughhousing and settling an arm around her in a way specifically gaged to judge the reaction. Which means he knows. No way he hasn’t finally figured out what his lizard brain has clearly been screaming for months (seriously, she deserves a medal. Someone tell her future girlfriends about her stamina), not with the way he’s twirling a soft brown curl around and around his finger. He must know Eddie can feel that. And oh. Steve is not-so-subtly glancing to his right, trying to gage that reaction like they discussed, to see if this is ok.

Yup. Robin needs to be literally anywhere else. She tries to be subtle (insert laugh here), muttering “bathroom” and legging it out of the room, seeking the safety of the kitchen. She wasn’t worried though- odds are she could start playing trumpet and those two wouldn’t hear it past the tension of the moment.

 ~*~

In addition to gay, Robin is also easily bored. She hums along to “Always look on the bright side of life,” drifting in from the living room, crunching on some peppery crackers she found in a cabinet in a way that vaguely matches the song’s rhythm. She would just leave the boys to whatever they were going to do (yuck, don’t think about it), but unfortunately the two people most likely to give her a ride home were occupied (seriously, no thinking about it). She’d held out for as long as she could, really, but if the movie was ending, surely she had given them enough time?

Hoping she wasn’t going to regret it, she peaked out of the kitchen, and was relieved to see that 1) everyone still had clothes on and 2) Steve and Eddie were cuddling. Fucking finally.

“SO, BOYS,” she boomed (remember loud is on the list of things she is), trying not to enjoy the way two ridiculous heads of hair jumped and then shifted away from one another anxiously. “Who finally lost the longest game of gay chicken I’ve ever seen?”

Steve’s head makes an audible thump as it drops against the back of the couch, hands coming up to rub at his face as she rounds the furniture to face them, feeling deliciously smug. Eddie gave up any pretense and buried his face in Steve’s shoulder, sweater and hair completely hiding his face.

“Shut up Robin, go away,” Steve groans.

“Nope! This has been the slowest burn of all time, you guys were killing me. I have to balance it out by being just as insufferable.” she chirped, doing her best Steve impression, hands on her hips and eyebrow quirked.

“Technically, I would say we both won gay chicken since neither of us pulled back. No chickens here. Roosters only, in fact.” Eddie surfaces with a smug little smile, dimples on full display.

“Oh you’re definitely a cock Munson, I’ll give you that,”

“Don’t make me flip you the bird-”

“That’s a bit of ostritch-”

“Well toucan play at that game-”

“I’m so happy I like tits-“

“Why me?” Steve grumbled at the same time Eddie dropped his teasing tone to ask, “Wait what?”

“Me? Lesbian. You? Obviously gay. Steve has been flirting back at you for months you dingus.”

“I’ve been what?” Steve sits up straight, suddenly laser focused on Robin. “I have not. I only realized, like, a week ago-”

He was seriously going to be the death of her.

“Steve. Stephen. My guy. What would you say if I told you a girl had been giving me a hair show, the unnecessary squeeze-by, and big eyes? Consistently. For weeks.”

Eddie starts laughing. Then cackling. Steve went an even deeper shade of red, though she could tell this one was more indignant ruby than embarrassed scarlet.

“Thank you,” Eddie wheezed out, fighting down another fit, picking himself up from where he had slid down the couch. “Oh my god, thank you for fucking noticing that. He was wasn’t he? I thought it was just in my head, y’know, and Gareth always said I tend to imagine signs that aren’t there.”

“Oh I know, you think you have a hard time, girls are so physically affectionate platonically, it’s impossible to tell-”

“Ok. Done with this conversation!” Steve interrupted, standing up between the two of them, hands furiously combing through his hair.

Robin only grinned wider at Eddie. “So, Munson, care to give me a ride home?”

“You know, Buckley, I would be delighted.”

“Hey now-” Steve tried to interject as the two of them moved towards the door.

“Why thank you, kind sir.”

“Don’t mention it, fair lady. Your chariot awaits.”

“Wait, hang on, Eddie-” Steve’s tone shifted from confused to plaintive as she stepped out into the night. And she resolutely pretended to not hear Eddie’s reply before he closed the door behind them.

“Sit tight, big boy, I’ll be right back!”

[pippin-katz]

He Likes You

I was just thinking about this line and how meaningful it is, because it truly is.

Hunith has literally known Arthur for a couple days, but she can already read him incredibly well. Not only does she deduce that he cares about Merlin, she specifically says he likes him.

What’s the difference? Why does that matter?

Think about what you imagine someone behaves like when they like something or someone. They’re usually pretty happy, smiling, and they say good things about it. When it comes to typical behavior, it’s easy to tell when someone likes something.

Merlin likes doing magic, and he shows it when he can:

Think about Arthur though. He doesn’t seem to like anything when you use those behaviors as the evidence. The viewer knows it’s just Arthur’s personality, but from a complete outside perspective, he doesn’t appear to like anything.

He doesn't truly smile that much. He makes fun of everyone he's close to, sometimes even going too far with Merlin in particular.

This is how most people would expect him to act if he likes someone:

But he doesn't act like that on a regular basis. He rarely ever actually smiles like that, and especially not around people.

When he smiles normally, there's an undertone of cockiness or superiority that comes with being the prince and having to behave a certain way in front of others. It's not quite genuine. (The first episode is the perfect example of that.)

Or it's not even really a smile. He's not frowning, and you can tell by his eyes that it's a positive expression, but he's not showing a full smile to indicate that he's really happy.

OR he's got his "public face" on; it's sort of blank, but it changes slightly depending on the context. It's a guarded/doubtful/slightly annoyed look, but it's not a full frown that implies a bad mood. He uses it when he's in court with Uther, when he's bickering with Merlin, and when he's thinking. It's sort of his resting expression.

Uther does the same thing, where he's not really smiling, but you can tell it's a positive expression.

The thing is, you don't need to like someone in order to care about them. Plenty of people care about the wellbeing of people that they don't actually like.

Perfect example: Merlin and Gwen wanting to help Uther despite both having justifiable reasons to want him dead.

So liking someone isn't the same as caring about someone, cool, but what's the big deal with Hunith's line about Arthur? He obviously cares and likes Merlin, why does this matter?

Hunith doesn’t witness any behavior from Arthur to indicate that he likes Merlin, other than helping out his village. But:

This is an absolutely true statement. Merlin may be in denial that Arthur would actually like him, but he’s not wrong at all. Arthur earlier in this very episode voiced his desire to help anyone regardless of where they live. He helps people throughout the show in ways that don’t benefit him: Mordred as a kid; the woman in the tavern who was being harassed; Guinevere when Elyan was captured; the old woman about to be burned at the stake.

Hunith, however, can see through all of that.

What do you do when you like someone?

You care for their well-being

You think of them fondly

You enjoy their company

You want them to be happy

Arthur likes Merlin. He thinks of him as a close friend. He wants to make him happy, and to keep him safe. He wants him around. And Hunith figures this out from a couple days of observing them.

My mind starts to run around, because I wonder what Hunith saw in Arthur during the short period she spent with him that told her that he liked Merlin. His father didn't understand why Arthur cared about Merlin even when he saved his life twice.

It makes me so curious of what Hunith was thinking. You know what they say about mothers always knowing.

[flugsammy]

HEYYYYY!!! Got another request for ya! Can we get the main 3 with an s/o that is an actor (and- if you can include it-) they’re mostly in musicals? Not like kids musicals but more like, 13 and up kind of things? Aka like Mean girls or heathers!

HELLO, GIGI!!! I apologize for all the delay. Creative block has been killing me, but I'll try to post other requests this week.

Have a good read!❤️

-

🎩Black Hat:🎩

In a romantic setting, Black Hat would certainly feel at least a shred of pride in your work, however, how you act about it would influence how he shows his 'appreciation'. If you are too cocky about your profession, he would definitely find a way to break your pride, so maybe you should behave in front of him. Don't expect compliments that resemble genuine admiration, but he would use your work as a kind of flirtation. (Alan has already confirmed that he's a sly dog, what did you expect?/j).

He would make a few faces at the language, depending on which musicals you participated in (he's a classical man, so he prefers things with less 'vulgar' language). In general, he would take some time to watch some of your movies with a glass of wine in hand. It's your choice to decide whether you want to stay by his side while this happens. (Friendly advice: don't do that.)

✈️Dr Flug✈️:

It's difficult to tell how Flug would react to that, keeping in mind that he doesn't like music. Well, that's because he still hasn't found any melody that makes him feel. In a positive scenario, we could say that he would learn to like any song that features your vocals, but realistically, that would hardly happen. Please, don't misunderstand him! He wouldn't be rude about it. Knowing the doctor, he would try to pretend to like it in front of you. It's not like he hates it. Your action and voice are impeccable, maybe it's just not his thing...?

Nevertheless, he would definitely enjoy watching your movies when there isn't incessant singing! If you recommend a movie to him, firmly assuring him that he would like it, he’d save up his monthly five seconds of free time to watch your entire movie! (You would have to wait 5 years for him to manage to watch the entire movie, so patience would be required for that🤷).

🦎Demencia🦎:

Keeping in mind that Demencia would be equally crazy if she was in love with anyone other than Black Hat, she would watch ALL of your movies. Literally all of them. Even the ones you no longer remember acting in. The lizard girl would ask (or force) you to do personal shows for her, where she would be rocking the guitar and you would be performing vocals.

Any time movies are involved, she would be the first to suggest that everyone watch a movie in which you were cast. You'd have a little trouble telling whether she likes these movies/series so much just because you're involved in the acting or if it's simply because the more “maturely fun” genres are her thing. Probably both. You'd catch her humming the song from a movie you starred in, or even imitating the lines and movements of her favorite character (we already know the kind of character she'd like, right?)

Overall, our girl would be your number one fan!

Bonus: 5.0.5 would be curious to watch a movie you were in, but Flug would hide all the tapes to prevent him from coming across something not appropriate for his age.

Thanks for reading!

[katakaluptastrophy]

This may be something you have already covered, or considered and discarded, but. Thoughts on Jod being trans?

Because it seemed slightly odd to me, that a AMAB kid going to his grandmother’s house would be allowed to play with his mum’s toys. Especially if they’re “traditionally girly” toys, as opposed to being told to run around or given a ball to do sports.

Whereas a little AFAB kid would gladly be given his mum’s dolls by a traditional grandma and told to play nicely and quietly. Not identifying with the Barbies so much as finding them so pretty (especially compared to the Ken dolls that look nothing like him, which he feeds to Ulysses the dog).

And then, two or three decades later and finding that he is now God. He has consumed the Earth and her siblings and made her anew.

How easy is it to change the bits about himself he never felt were right? To remake himself as God in the flesh? To look upon himself and say, it is good?

"When I was seven, you know, all Nana had to play with in her house was some of Mum's old toys. And my favouite out of all of them..." He gave a long, shuddering sigh. "My favourite was her old Hollywood Hair Barbie," he murmured. "I loved her little gold outfit and her long yellow hair. She was the best. She got to have all the adventures. There was also a Bride's Dream Midge, but Mum had cut Midge's hair into this weird mullet. It was Barbie for me." She looked at him. He looked at her. He added, "Not Hollywood Hair Ken. Mum had him too, but he was a creep. I gave him to Nana's dog to eat."

This is what we get when John is describing the "scraps of id" that lead him to make Alecto look like some kind of nightmarish Barbie. The 'id' is, psychoanalytically, the most instinctual, basic part of the self. If John is being truthful here, then he's expressing something very basic about himself and his motivations in making Alecto.

I'm not convinced that we can infer anything about his Nana's attitude towards what toys a child should be allowed to play with. John is probably born somewhere between the mid 90s to the mid 20s, so it's just as possible that John playing with his mum's old Barbies is evidence that his family was fairly progressive. Or too poor to afford new toys. Or just ambivalent about the toys he played with.

In terms of John and gender, or at least John and masculinity, this interview has an interesting insight into what Tamsyn might be doing with that:

the God of the Locked Tomb IS a man; he IS the Father and the Teacher; it’s an inherently masc role played by someone who has an uneasy relationship himself to playing a Biblical patriarch. John falls back on hierarchies and roles because they’re familiar even when he’s struggling not to. Even he identifies himself as the God who became man and the man who became God.

Though of course, to quote a different interview, this is a series where "readers will end up STICKY and GREASY with GENDER and BIBLE" and where Lyctorhood is "a huge genderfuck".

So I think there's certainly scope for trans readings of John, which shift the framework for the way that John is positioning himself in relation to his masc roleplaying of god. There's a number of elements that would have a very different resonance in such readings, not least putting Alecto into such a specific version of a woman's body, and the tension between his own exercise of bodily autonomy and his utter restriction and violation of others' bodily autonomy.

Personally, my take is that John is meant to be a type of cis man I'm sure many of us have met - one who is at pains to demonstrate his feminism, who perhaps finds the boundaries of masculinity confining to some extent, but who is ultimately unwilling to examine how deeply those boundaries are part of the way he views the world and interacts with others. And with John, this is writ large, quite literally: endowed with godlike power, he falls back on the patriarchal image of god. John may go out of his way to tell us that the maternity problem was important to him, that he played with Barbies, that he *cares*, but at the end of the day that introspection doesn't translate into his actions.

Regardless of how John came to his relationship with masculinity, he's stuck with - or perhaps in context we could say haunted by - a very particular conception of patriarchal masculinity.