#this is a very complicated topic and I could talk about it for hours | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

angellayercake · 10 months ago

Text

Banchetto: Formaggi e Frutta

Papa Emeritus III x Reader | NSFW

AO3 | Insalata | Masterpost

Selecting the pairings for cheese can be deceptively complicated. Anyone can put some cheese on a tray and call it done but for it to be truly good some serious thought needs to be done. Texture, flavour, sweet vs savoury, creamy vs crunchy, all build up to a well rounded dish. The first bite of a juicy grape paired with tang of a strong cheddar, or the sweet bitterness of cranberry with the mellow creaminess of a brie. Every element has to work together to create a bigger experience. If you make these choices with care then you will have a show stopping course and all you had to do was some slicing.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

You had been lingering in his office. He was perched on the edge of his desk with his arms locked around you, preventing you from leaving and ending your time together for the day. The two of you had been in this position for at least half an hour, every time you tried to extricate yourself he would pull you in for one last kiss which became two, then three, then he would remember another important matter you just had to discuss right now. So far you had covered Cabaret the musical, why linen was the superior summer material, his favourite type of pen to do signings and the lies he used to tell people about ghoul mating habits. And now you were discussing your favourite cheeses.

‘I honestly have to say I don’t think I have tried a cheese I didn't like,’ you admit after listening to him explain why Italian cheeses were by far the best in the world. He wrinkles his nose at you, shaking his head in disgust. As inconsequential as these topics were, you enjoyed hearing his typically outlandish opinions and his passionate defence of them. You may have even been guilty of disagreeing with him deliberately from time to time just to enjoy his attempts to convince you of his point of view.

‘Even the stinky ones?’ He looks like even just thinking of them is a displeasure he can’t abide, the charmingly emphasised wrinkles above the bridge of his nose almost distracting you from his argument. ‘The French, thinking they can get away with crimes against dairy just because of a few good ones,’ he grumbles, pulling a laugh from you.

‘I think the English are guilty of that too, I am afraid,’ you remind him. ‘Have you ever tried Stinking Bishop?’

‘Ugh!! Never and I never will,’ he shakes his head again refusing to even entertain the thought. ‘But, cara mia, that is why everything Italian is far superior,’ he says, lifting his eyebrows suggestively and you suspect he isn’t just talking about cheese any more.

‘With what I have learned in the last few months I can’t say I disagree,’ you reply against his lips as he is already reeling you in for another kiss. You don’t let him distract you for too much longer though this time. ‘I don’t think you should judge a cheese until you try it with accompaniments though. The right flavours paired with the right cheese can make all the difference.’

‘I suppose there is some truth to what you say, mia cuocoina,’ he trails off for a moment looking like he is waging a battle internally before he takes a deep breath and continues. ‘Speaking of cheese, did you know there is a farmers market in town this weekend? I have heard they have very many types of cheese on sale there.’

‘I had heard, yes. It happens every month.’ You think back fondly to those trips out of the Abbey with Mona. ‘We used to take it in turns to go and pick up some obscure ingredients as a challenge for the others. I haven’t had a chance to go for a while.’

‘Would you like to go to this one? With me?’ His hesitancy makes your heart melt. How this man could ever think you wouldn’t want to go with him you have no idea? As if you don’t willingly spend almost every moment of your free time with him.

‘Are you asking me on a date, Terzo?’ You tease, hoping to ease his worry a little. The two of you may have done everything backwards but you can’t help the little thrill you get from the idea of him taking you on a proper date. He had been watching you nervously as he waited for your response but at your gentle teasing the corner of his lips pulled up in a smile even as a light blush crawled across his cheeks.

‘Si, I am,’ he says simply, lifting his head and looking you directly in the eyes, hypnotising you for a moment in his gaze.

‘I would love to go with you,’ you reply as soon as you snap out of it, not wanting to leave him hanging any longer. His wide smile always takes your breath away and you stand there for far too long, just grinning at each other before you realise you do really need to leave. You give him one last kiss before making your way back to your room, mind full of your upcoming date.

The morning arrives and you are up early having explained to Terzo that the earlier you get there the better. It would be less busy, you got the best pick of the produce and all the tasters won’t have sat out for so long. Taking your advice he had agreed to leave the Abbey around nine, and also on your advice you both were skipping breakfast, not wanting to fill yourselves up before you get there. But his morning coffee is non-negotiable…

After getting ready you let yourself into his rooms and start the coffee machine. You can hear him moving about already so you don’t worry about getting him up, but instead have time to fuss about… well, everything. You smooth your hands over your outfit as you wait letting your nerves get the better of you for a second. It’s not to say you didn’t usually make an effort with your appearance, you did, but your clothes and hair had to be practical when cooking even if just for him. This was the first time you had had the opportunity to dress up and for some reason it had your stomach in knots.

You wore your hair down today, letting the dark waves cascade down your back where they were usually secured in a bun and your make up was light as you had considered the time of day - just a subtle base and some eyeliner, mascara and lipstick to add a little emphasis to your features. The dress you picked was one you had never worn before. It was black, as was the majority of your wardrobe, but the light cotton fell softly over your figure, the hem ending at your mid-calf. It was buttoned up from your chest to your knees, giving a glimpse of leg and decolletage you hoped would capture his attention without flaunting too much. The puff sleeves and broderie anglaise finish the look and make it, in your opinion, the perfect dress for a date at the farmers market.

Just as you finish the coffee you hear him come to the door. You turn around a cup in each hand to catch him frozen in the doorway. With one hand he is clinging to the door frame and then other is laid dramatically over his heart. He is looking at you as if he has never seen you before. He looks incredible himself, his hair slicked back as you had not seen it for a long time and his face surprisingly clear of his paints, given you were leaving the Abbey. He is wearing an off-white revere collar shirt, habitually unbuttoned half way down his chest over tailored linen trousers in a soft dove grey with black woven loafers. He has a matching linen blazer over his arm, and he looks like he has just stepped out of the pages of a Milanese fashion magazine.

‘Good morning, Terzo,’ you greet as you go to hand him his coffee but he ignores it in favour of pulling you in for a kiss, letting go of the door frame and instead wrapping his arm around your waist and letting his hand glide down your body over the smooth fabric. You hum into his mouth enjoying his attentions but slightly worried about spilling coffee on you both as you hold them over his shoulders. ‘I could get used to this sort of greeting,’ you say when he lets you pull away, still seemingly at a loss for words.

‘Grazie,’ he whispers, finally taking his coffee and savouring the first sip before continuing, letting his eyes roam all over you. ‘You are, well… beautiful doesn’t even cover it, I think. Sei una visione di bellezza, come non ne ho mai viste.’ He does this every now and then, slipping into his native tongue when he can’t seem to find the words to express himself in English. You don’t understand what he is saying but the sentiment is clear, so you let the melodic words wash over you and let your smile widen in response.

‘You are looking very handsome today too.’ You cup his cheek with your now free hand and let him nuzzle into your palm. ‘I have been looking forward to this all week.’

‘Me too, cara mia.’ He places his hand over yours before taking it in his. ‘Are you ready to go?’

‘I’ve got my coffee, I've got you, I don't think I need anything else. And if we leave now everyone will still be at breakfast so we shouldn’t be bothered.’ With a nod and a smile he leads you from the kitchen through his rooms and out to the corridor, pausing only to lock the door behind you. You realise then that this is probably going to be the first time he has left the Abbey since returning from the last tour and what a big step this must be for him, as well as the two of you. You walk through the corridors quickly, leaving a plausible distance between you in case you were seen by anyone but before you reach the main entrance he leads you down an old corridor that, as far as you knew, only led to an older unused wing of the Abbey.

‘Where are we going?’ You ask him as you follow him along the twists and turns of the dusty corridor but he just shushes you and continues as though he is looking for something. To your surprise he ignores the few doors you pass coming to a stop at an old painting covered in dust, which depicts what you can only assume is a life-sized satanic knight posing in his armour in the landscape of hell. Without any further explanation he feels around the edge of the frame until you hear a click and the painting swings forward revealing a secret set of stairs leading down to a door where you can see slivers of daylight seeping in where it has warped in its frame. Taking your hand he helps you down the steps before having to give the door a shove once, then twice before it opens and you find yourselves at the side of the main Abbey just outside the tall garden wall.

‘This is the way we used to go when we didn’t want anyone to see us leaving,’ he says, shooting you a mischievous grin. ‘When we were boys especially and the older sisters wouldn’t give us the time of day we would sneak into town…’ He trails off realising the story he was about to tell you and his expression turns a little sheepish. ‘Well, you know how teenage boys can be.’ You shake your head at him good naturedly but take his offered hand so he can lead you down what is clearly a well trodden path through the public gardens to a side gate that opens on the main road into town.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

The first and arguably most important consideration when preparing a dish like this is making everything bitesize. Slice things too small and the flavours will not balance well, slice things too big and you will end up with all sorts of mess, but getting it just right? A slice of cheese, a piece of fruit, a spoonful of chutney, a sliver of meat could all fit on a cracker and be eaten in one perfect bite.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

It is a short pleasant walk especially on a morning like this. The Abbey is about half a mile from the town and despite the occasional comment or funny look, the residents seem to have accepted sharing the area with a satanic church a long time ago. The residents of the Abbey brought a lot of business to the local shops and trades people, doing their best to contribute to the community they were fringe members of which served to strengthen the tolerance of their presence. You yourself had good relationships with the local food stores, avoiding spending your budget at the supermarket as much as you could, so you had never experienced anything but a sideways glance from some of the more conservative members of the community.

After about fifteen minutes you reach the town square which is already bustling with life even at this early hour of the weekend. Rows and rows of stalls fill the usually open space and there are already plenty of shoppers drifting from stall to stall. Having finished your coffees, you take his and put them in the nearest bin before pausing so you can come up with a plan of action.

‘When I come with Mona we try to be strategic,’ you explain as you try and suss out what the closest stalls are selling.

‘Oh, and why is this? To get the best produce? The best deals?’ He asks inquisitively, tilting his head as he thinks. You wish you could say those were the reasons but it was much less professional.

‘Nope. It is so we don’t get too full before we have eaten everything we want.’ He laughs loudly, clearly surprised at your reasoning but you try your best to keep your face straight. ‘It is important you know!’ you insist as his laughter calms.

‘You have been training me up for this moment, no?’ he says, patting his belly and winking at you knowingly.

‘Bigger appetites than yours have been defeated by the farmer’s market tasters, I will have you know,’ you respond, doing your best not to get distracted by his insinuation.

‘Psh, I could eat one of everything and still have room for whatever delicious dish you have planned for tonight.’ He winds his arm around your waist pulling you against his side as you walk together to the first stall. You can’t keep up your serious façade, his confidence and manhandling bringing a flush to your cheeks, at least until you realise what he said.

‘Need I remind you it is Saturday and my day off.’ You prod him in the side in retaliation and he jumps slightly when you catch his ticklish spot. He grabs your finger before you can poke him again, a little tug of war ensuing before he lets you free with a stern look.

‘Well I can cook for you then,’ he says, snapping his fingers as the idea comes to him. You dip your head for a moment, your chest feeling full at his insistence you spend even more of today together. Until the reality of him cooking anything for you sinks in. You had long suspected that he lacked even the most basic cooking skills, which was confirmed the only time you ever let him try to help you.

‘And what exactly are you going to cook for me?’ You ask as you reach the first stall filled with assorted jars of conserves and jams.

‘I will cook…’ He pauses, looking around at the closet stalls. ‘Cheese!’ he exclaims loudly, drawing some looks and a chuckle from the cheesemonger a couple of stalls over. He clears his throat, quieting his voice. ‘Cheese, cara mia, like we talked about the other night. Cheese and crackers and fruit and chutney. Like this!’ He picks up a jar of spiced cranberry chutney from the stall.

‘That will be 55 krona please, sir,’ the lady behind the stall tells him. He hands the jar to you and fishes his wallet out of his pocket, handing her cash and insisting she keep the change.

‘That’s not exactly cooking is it,’ you scoff, putting the jar in one of the many tote bags you had thought to bring along. ‘But that being said, I would be happy to join you this evening.’

‘Maybe not but I can assure you I will put a lot more effort into dessert,’ he replies with a smirk as he pulls you towards the cheesemonger. ‘Now, Signior, I need a selection of your best cheese for mia cuocoina, and a little advice.’

He leads the way around the market, insisting on tasting this and that and asking questions of the vendors about flavour pairings and serving suggestions until your tote bags are beginning to weigh you both down. You find a bench at the edge of the square and flop down onto it taking the weight off your aching shoulders. He follows after you, sliding the bags to one side so he can sit right beside you.

‘Try this, cara mia,’ he holds a small pastry to your lips, one he has already tried if the tell tale crumbs around his lips were anything to go buy. You almost refuse, your tactical plan having flown out the window long ago at his insistence you taste test almost everything. He looks at you beseechingly though and you cave, opening your mouth and allowing him to feed it to you. Before he can pull away though you close your lips around his fingers, getting your own back the only way you can right now. He freezes, his pupils blown wide as he watches you suck the tips of his fingers.

‘Fancy seeing you here.’ A voice you recognise breaks through your lustful haze. You almost choke between the pastry and Terzo whipping his fingers from your mouth as if they were burning. You swallow your mouthful without even registering if it was nice or not as you turn to see Lilly and Rich stood before you. You jump up quickly, offering them each a hug, then trying to stand between them and Terzo, wracking your brain to explain why you were out in public with Papa's fingers in your mouth.

‘Hi guys, what a lovely surprise. You should really try the pastries from over there, they are very good…’ You can feel your face burning completely at a loss on how to explain away what they must have seen.

‘Will Papa hand feed them to us as well?’ Rich asks sardonically, looking at you with your eyebrows raised as if waiting for an answer. At least until Lilly elbows him sharply in the ribs.

‘It’s so nice to see you and to see you too, Papa. Hello!’ She says leaning around you to offer Terzo a wave. He stands dusting crumbs from his face and his shirt and carefully keeping some space between you as he shifts to see them both.

‘Hello, Sister…’ He glances at you and you realise he has never met them before and some introductions are in order.

‘Lilly, Ter… Papa, this is Lilly and Rich. We work together in the kitchens.’ Lilly smiles at him offering another wave which he returns but Rich still doesn’t look impressed, clearly wanting to confront you both on what he saw.

‘Ah, si. Hello, Sister Lilly and Brother Rich. And I can assure you those pastries are delicious whether fed from my own hands or not.’ He switches his Papa persona on, and it’s a little jarring after all this time. ‘Sorella here, I have tired her out having her carry all these bags of things I wanted. I thought I better not tire her arms any further.’

‘Right,’ Rich replies slightly at a loss for words. You don’t think his story has helped the situation at all but though he looks a little awkward and uncomfortable, it doesn’t seem like Terzo really minds the two of you getting caught, so you take a deep breath and relax.

‘All this shopping and eating… I could do with another coffee, I think. Si…’ He nods to himself, already heading towards the coffee stall. ‘Anyone else?’ He asks almost as an afterthought and you all nod. ‘Four coffees then, ok.’ The three of you watch him go but as soon as he is out of earshot, they both turn to you.

‘What the hell was that?’ Rich asks in an angry whisper. ‘I thought you were just doing your job and he was far too stressed about getting fired to try it on? Not that it looked like he had to try that hard…’ He had always been protective of the three of you, but you couldn’t help feeling defensive when he had no idea what had been growing between you.

‘Oh leave her be, they both looked happy while they were doing it. What does it matter?’ You smile at Lilly appreciatively, thankful for her understanding.

‘Guys, please just listen.’ You knew you had to explain something. ‘We, well, look, we just-’ You can’t even find the words to start. It’s not like with Mona where you can tell her everything and she just understands, not that you have time for that anyway. You glance over to the stall and see him standing in line, carefully studying the menu and certainly not looking back over every few seconds. ‘I… I can’t really explain what we are; not at the moment,’ you sigh. ‘But Lilly is right, we are happy, everything is fine.’

‘You do look happy, and he looks better too.’ Lilly says reassuringly and you breathe a sigh of relief.

‘Yeah, no one can accuse you of slacking on feeding him.’ Both you and Lilly turn to glare at him.

‘Don’t be a dick, Rich!’ she admonishes him, treating him to another elbow to the ribs.

‘What?’ He says defensively rubbing his side. ‘He is looking a lot more well-fed than he ever did before.’ It isn’t an apology but it is probably as close as you will get from Rich.

‘Could you guys just keep this between us, please?’ You feel like you are begging, but the last thing you want is people finding out about the two of you through gossip. You hadn’t really thought about it or discussed it but you were sure that Terzo would like to tell his brothers himself when the time was right.

‘Keep what? There’s nothing to tell anyway, right Rich?’ She threatens him with her elbow one last time but relents when he agrees with a flinch.

‘Right, nothing to tell.’ The three of you look at him just as he looks away sharply and he gets handed the tray of coffees. You feel a little relief but the silence is awkward as you wait for him to make his way back over.

‘Caffè for everyone!’ He announces on his return and you each take a cup.

‘Thank you Papa, that was very kind,’ Lilly thanked him genuinely. ‘But we better get going. We have a list. Mona has really taken to bossing us around since you've been gone.’ You know she is joking, but it still sends a pang through you. As happy as you are in your current position, you do miss them. ‘Anyway, it was lovely to see you! Bye!’ She grabs Rich by the elbow and drags him away with only one last glare over his shoulder.

‘Terzo, I’m sorry,’ You say slumping back onto the bench.

‘They didn’t know about us?’ He asks cautiously. He sits beside you but leaves enough space to be considered decent and keeps his hands to himself. You can’t decide if you are disappointed or not.

‘No, they didn’t.’ You shoot him a sideways glance and he is looking down at his coffee, his expression unreadable.

‘So, you haven’t spoken to anyone about…?’ He trails off, neither of you at a point of being able to define what is going on between you. ‘Even before, you didn’t seek out your friends?’

‘Well I did… Mona, but I trust her. She would never say anything.’ He holds up a hand to halt you and you feel a bubble of panic starting to grow in your chest.

‘That’s not what I meant, cara mia.’ He finally looks at you now and the bubble dissolves. His eyes are warm, full of care. ‘I am glad you spoke to your friend about this, just as I am glad of her discretion. I would hate to think about you being so upset and also alone.’

‘You were dealing with it all alone.’ His hand rests on the bench between you and you place yours over the top. It feels wrong not to be touching at all during such a conversation.

‘Ah, I am used to it,’ he says, brushing you off. ‘I am used to it.’ He turns his hand under yours loosely lacing your fingers together. ‘And anyway, I am not alone anymore am I?’ It’s a slow smile that grows across his face, like he is only just realising it now.

‘No you aren’t,’ you confirm, squeezing his hand and returning his smile. If you had your way he would never be alone again.

‘May I ask,’ he pauses like he isn’t sure he wants to ask what he is about to say. ‘Why you didn’t tell your other friends?’ But this is something you can easily offer him an answer to.

‘Well it’s just… Lilly is young, she is only twenty. It feels a little odd talking to her about relationships when she feels like a little sister, and Rich? Well, he is the biggest gossip in the whole kitchen. It’s not that I don’t trust him, but he just gets a little carried away sometimes.’ You can’t help your fond smile. ‘And he is pretty protective of us, even if he can be a little bit of a dick about it.’

‘I see, I see.’ He seems happy enough accepting your reasons. ‘Are you ok?’ He inches a little closer now, already over keeping a sensible distance.

‘Yeah, I am.’ You decide even as you are saying it. The confrontation with your friends could have gone better, but it could have gone a lot worse. And it’s better you get caught by your friends then any other random inhabitant of the Abbey. In fact, you should have foreseen this happening, going out together so close to home. You wonder if he feels the same though. ‘Are you?’

‘Si, I think it is time to go home though,’ he says and you nod in agreement. You think you have both had enough excitement for today. ‘I called for a car while I was waiting for the coffee,’ he admits a little sheepishly.

‘Oh, thank Satan.’ Your relief is palpable, both your full stomach and your sore shoulders thankful. ‘I thought we were going to have to carry all of this back.’

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

Presentation is the second most important consideration and for that you need a suitable foundation. Depending on the number of people you are catering for you need a vessel large enough to hold enough food. The material is less important, dictated by aesthetic preference, whether you prefer wood, glass, slate or porcelain. Consider whether you need vessels for particular ingredients, additional cutlery to serve. By planning for all eventualities you make sure the meal is a success.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

With a plea from you and an order from Terzo a ghoul assists in carrying the bags back to his rooms, leaving them on the kitchen table before departing to wherever it is ghouls go when off duty. You begin to unpack, starting to sort out the haul to put in the appropriate storage but he comes behind you taking your wrists in his hands and steers you back out of the kitchen.

‘Mia cuocoina please,’ he murmurs against the back of my head. ‘I need peace for the art I am about to create.’ You try to suppress your laugh but it comes out an inelegant snort.

‘I can help,’ you reply, twisting in his arms to look at him. ‘Just tell me what you want me to do.’

‘No,’ he says, shaking his head. ‘It is my turn to make food for you!’ He continues shepherding you backwards towards his office. ‘Go have a nap, visit friends, whatever.’ he drops a kiss on your lips before spinning you back around.

‘You may come back in two hours,’ he swats at your ass as he opens the door and lets you out into the hallway.

You pause for a moment wondering where you even wanted to go. Going back to your rooms wasn’t very appealing, there were no distractions there and you knew the time would crawl by. The kitchens were out of the question right now if you didn't want to be subjected to the interrogation you were spared in town, something you were keen to avoid as long as possible. The gardens were an option except you could still feel the ache in your arms from carrying the bags around the market and you know for certain if Primo catches you in the garden there was no chance you would be leaving unencumbered by whatever vegetables he could give you.

Your wandering takes you past the upper clergy offices, mostly dark and unused of a Saturday afternoon but you spot movement behind one of the doors and you are not surprised when you realise whose it is. There is only one person you know that would willingly work on a Saturday and fortunately that was a person you had been meaning to speak to. Since you and Terzo had joined his brothers for lunch in fact. You had no sweet treats prepared for him today but you were sure he could do with a break. He could always do with a break.

Approaching the closed door you knock softly and wait for him to answer and the slightly frantic scuffling you can hear lets you know you won’t have to wait long. But a few moments pass before he answers the door. His exhaustion is plain on his face, sadly not much different than any of the other times you have seen him lately.

‘Sorella,’ he says with a tired smile when he registers it is you at his door. ‘How can I help you today?’

‘I found myself at a loose end and saw you were working!’ You explain as he holds the door open for you and gestures to the seat before his desk. ‘And why are you working on a Saturday?’

‘There is so much to do and so little time,’ he says, flopping back into his chair with a heavy sigh. ‘I was not busy today anyway so I thought why waste time when there is so much to catch up on.’ The clergy’s decision to remove Terzo from his position has caused more problems than you had first thought. You can’t help thinking how odd it is that no new Papa had been appointed after all these months when there was clearly a need but you set that aside for now.

‘Even you need a break Cardinal.’ You struggle to keep the worry from your voice.

‘Well you are here, let's have a break now.’ His smiles grows more genuine as he speaks. ‘I wished to speak with you anyway.’

‘Yes me too,’ you agree. It makes it easier now that he has brought it up himself. ‘I have been meaning to come and see you since the lunch but well, you know Papa, he was keeping me busy. Even on my day off he had me going into town with him to the farmers market.’ You are starting to worry your blush is becoming permanent and you hope your smile isn’t as sappy as it feels. If you plan to continue keeping your relationship quiet you really need to get better at schooling your reactions.

‘Si, I imagine Papa has lots to keep you busy.’ he agrees laughing but his face turns serious. ‘He is.. Well he is treating you well Sorella?’ He pauses, seeming to choose his words carefully, his fingers coming up to play with his moustache nervously. ‘Like a gentleman? When things are hard I think sometimes he can forget he is a good man.’ You sense that Copia may be talking from personal experience and having seen that side of Terzo yourself you are keen to reassure him.

‘I think I understand what you mean, Cardinal, he …’ You pause thinking over your wording just as carefully. ‘When I first began working for him he was different, while everything was fresh but he, we, found a compromise. He has apologised for some of his more thoughtless actions.’ Copia raises his eyebrows and you panic momentarily. ‘Oh nothing so bad and really, I had a lot of sympathy for his situation. I wasn’t expecting him to be at his best.’

‘It was regrettable what happened.’ He takes off his beretta and runs his hands through his hair. ‘It .. well it was unexpected for all of us, I think but it is good to see him doing better.’ He does look genuinely relieved even though the situation has clearly impacted him. ‘All this food seems to be doing the trick eh?’

‘The food probably has helped, yes,’ you laugh, and the rest you thought, keeping that to yourself. ‘But I think it is really just time, Cardinal.’ He would have improved with or without you over time but you do like to think you have helped him move on a little faster then he may have done otherwise.

‘Now, can we discuss those notes you brought me to translate?’ His direct questions bring you straight back down from your romantic imaginings.

‘I was waiting for you to bring them up.’ You know you owe him something of an explanation but you are not above waiting to see what he has worked out for himself.

‘They, well I suppose I don’t know enough to say really,’ he begins confidently before tailing off. ‘But they didn’t read like professional recipes.’

‘That's because they weren’t but Cardinal, it’s not my place to say more, not that I even really know anymore.’ In this at least you can be honest. You could probably make a good guess as to who wrote out the recipes but you aren’t willing to voice that now. ‘He gave me some recipes and he never said where they came from or why that was all he wanted and I didn’t feel it was my place to ask. There were things said at lunch that might have given me some clues but even so.’

‘Si, before. I noticed that too.’ He takes a deep breath before continuing. ‘It has not been long since I was considered an outsider to them and outsiders really know very little by design. If it hadn’t been announced that I was also Nihils son then that would still be the case. But even though I never grew up the way that they did, well Secondo and Terzo anyway, I was here in the Ministry already and I saw what happened.’

You say nothing, waiting for him to continue sensing his need to unburden himself.

‘I was brought up as an orphan you see and while most children in the church are brought up communally, orphan or otherwise, the Emeritus brothers were always separate.’ He switches into lecture mode but you still hang on his every word. There were very few people you mixed with who had been a member of the church for so long. ‘Primo has always been here, his mother was a Sister of great reputation chosen especially to birth an heir but Terzo and Secondo, their mothers must have met Nihil on his travels because they weren’t brought to the church until the were ten, Secondo only a few months before Terzo.’

‘What happened to their mothers?’ A part of you feels bad even asking but your curiosity wins out. You would not feel comfortable asking Terzo himself this but it feels like the last piece in a puzzle you had been building since you had accepted this position.

‘They just carried on with their lives I suppose. I know Primo fought with Nihil about it, that their mother’s should have been invited to join them or at least to visit but it was decided. No distractions, they had had ten years of normal life and now they were to prepare for their future as men of the Emeritus line.’ His expression turns wry as he continues. ‘It makes me almost glad that he didn’t acknowledge me until recently. I might have liked having brothers growing up though.’ You pat his arm where it rests on the desk offering what little comfort you can.

‘Anyway I know Terzo’s mother tried for a while, sending packages of food and presents for him but I don’t know what happened after that. One day they just stopped coming.’ Your heart clenches, for Terzo, for Copia, for all of them. They may be in some of the most powerful positions in the Clergy but it was clear they had all been forced to sacrifice a lot for the privilege.

‘It sounds like it wasn’t easy for any of you.’ Like any organisation there were machinations going on far above the notice of normal members like yourself, you weren’t naïve enough to think otherwise but you found it jarring learning that somewhere that had felt immediately like home and safety to you had treated these men so poorly.

‘No I suppose not.’ He rubs his hands over his face, the conversation having turned heavier than either of you expected. After a moment he offers you a tired smile. ‘Now tell me more about this farmers market.’ You while away the rest of the time describing in detail the stalls and the tasters and when you eventually leave you hope you both are feeling a little lighter.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

Once you have your vessel and your ingredients prepared then all that is left is the arrangement. There are endless ways to arrange the food enticingly. If you want your dish to be eye-catching and mouth watering you must consider the balance of colour and texture. You can create contrast with light and dark meats or cheeses. You may introduce pops of colours with fresh fruits and berries and mix textures with a soft cheese, a juicy fruit and a crisp cracker. Complimentary flavours could be grouped, the arrangement of your board encouraging certain combinations both traditional and daring. Your final result will be a visually appealing and delicious dish to present.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

It’s been a long time since you have had to knock before entering his quarters but it feels appropriate now, giving him a chance to finish the final touches to his creation before you enter. You almost reach the point of knocking again, wondering if he hadn’t heard you when he pulls the door open. He was still wearing his shirt and trousers but he had borrowed your apron.

‘This looks good on you,’ you tease, pulling at the strap around his neck, but he only takes your hand and leads you inside.

‘Now cara mia you are in for a treat if I do say so myself.’ When you reach the dining room he stops you, placing his hands over your eyes as he guides you the final distance. ‘No peaking now,’ He says as he positions you at the end of the table.

‘Ta daaa,’ He uncovers your eyes and as you blink you can’t help but be impressed. The centre of the table is covered in what may be every plate in the kitchen; each one has a different cheese and its suggested accompaniments arranged around it. You had fought valiantly for any cheeses other than Italian but he had refused to budge keen for you to taste all of his favourites. He pours you a glass of wine, a deep red and hands you a glass.

‘This is Barolo, aged in oak caskets it is the most decadent of Italian wines. The King of wines they call it.’ You take a sip and examine the flavours. It is rich, fruity and floral but with an earthiness that should pair well with your meal this evening. You were by no means a wine expert but your palette was well developed over your career and you can tell an expensive wine when you taste one.

‘Terzo this is very extravagant,’ you stop when he raises his hand.

‘You deserve the best, cara mia, as does this cheese!.’ He gestures across the table and you survey all the options before you, savouring another sip of the wine. In the middle he has laid out a selection of crackers, water, butter and grain in a variety of different shapes. There was crumbling gorgonzola drizzled with honey to calm the bite of the blue veins and topped with quartered grapes and shelled pistachios. Slices of nutty pecorino sit between folded slices of ham generously filled with halved figs and walnuts. Cubes of provolone mixed with slices of olive oil, cured sopressata and green olives and taleggio and apple slices wrapped in salty prosciutto. Finally a bowl of whipped mascarpone, dark red cherry and balsamic dressing pooling between the peaks and whole cherries and pecans sinking into the soft cheese.

He pulls out your chair for you, getting you comfortably seated then he goes to take off the apron before joining you at the table waiting as you take in the whole spread. It is strange being on the receiving end of such a gesture. You can’t remember the last time someone had prepared an extravagant meal for you like this, even if he had only sliced and arranged the food, it was clear how much effort he has put in to impress you.

He lets you start helping yourself to the plate closest to you when you struggle to decide where to begin with so many enticing options. The two of you are quiet for a time only pausing to express your pleasure with the flavours to each other. After trying at least two helpings of each cheese you sit back with your wine before your stomach begins protesting after your second round of overindulging for the day.

‘Thank you for doing this Terzo,’ you say as you watch him assemble another mouthful. ‘I’m not sure I remember the last time someone did this for me.’ He pauses before taking a bite, looking at you in surprise.

‘Is that so?’ He looks thoughtful as he finishes off his mouthful, getting every trace from his fingers. ‘You are very welcome, cara mia. In fact I enjoyed doing this more than I thought.’

‘Am I out of a job now?’ You joke just to watch his eyes widen in panic.

‘Hold on no no!’ He shakes his head emphatically. ‘I did not mean that at all. I will always prefer your incredible cooking.’

‘I suppose I will stick around then,’ you reassure him.

‘Thank Satan as much as this was fun. I could not imagine doing it everyday, multiple times.’ He looks exhausted just thinking about it. ‘You are a superwoman, mia cuocoina.’

‘I’m not, I just enjoy it,’ you explain. You always had since you were young and had followed your mother around the kitchen.

‘Why do you think you were so drawn to cooking?’ He asks. It wasn’t something you had thought much about before. It had just been a fact of your life.

‘Well I like food obviously,’ you say with a laugh but you pause as you think of what it is you enjoy most about it. ‘I think it's just such a big part of our lives, we have to eat to survive so why not make that as enjoyable as we can?’ Of course it is your job and has been for the longest time but there is a more personal element to it, especially when it comes to people you care about. ‘And you know if you can cook you can make your friend a delicious soup when they are ill, you can make their favourite pasta dish after they just got dumped or you can bewitch a man by making his stomach fall for you first,’ you finish with a wink.

‘Mmmm I see,’ he says sipping his wine, his eyes going heavy lidded as he regards you. ‘So this was your plan was it?’ His voice goes deep and teasing and you shift in your seat.

‘No, just a happy accident.’ You lean towards him without even noticing, so easily drawn into his orbit. ‘I think my food was just too good for you to resist.’ He nods in agreement, conceding to your point but this conversation is far from its end.

‘And what about you?’ He holds your gaze, keeping you attentive to his every word.

‘What about me?’ You ask, tilting your head not quite understanding his question.

‘What made you unable to resist your Papa?’ You swallow thickly. There are so many reasons you wouldn’t even know where to start.

‘You don’t need me to tell you how irresistible you are.’ you say instead. You aren’t against stroking his ego usually but you know he is well aware of his affect on people and you in particular.

‘I have my own charms. I am in no doubt about that.’ He says confidently and you know it is true. ‘You though? I think it is a little different than any I have seduced before.’

‘Oh?’ You have an inkling where he is going with this. You had your suspicions that there were a lot more feelings involved then either of you were used to in your past relationships but this didn’t feel like the build up to a heartfelt confession. He was looking at you as if he had been leading you to a trap and you had just fallen in.

‘You like feeding me.’ he states, matter of fact, placing his wine glass down on the table.

‘Yes we have discussed that.’ You are sure the two of you had discussed how you enjoyed taking care of him even as early as your first dinner together.

‘No we haven’t. Feed me.’ His voice is hard but not cold as he orders you but you hesitate.

‘What?’ You think back trying to clear your confusion and you remember the lunch or more specifically just before when you had been reassuring him in his bedroom. You had known then that he wouldn’t drop that forever but it still didn’t make you any more prepared.

‘I am not yet satisfied. Feed me.’ You swallow again, unable to control your body's reaction to his strict demands. You want to obey him, to feed him but again you hesitate.

‘Terzo …’ He gives you a stern look cutting you off before you can continue. ‘Papa?’ It comes out as a question but it seems obvious what he wants. He rewards you with a smirk.

‘I want some more gorgonzola, si,’ He encourages as you take a water cracker and begin to load it with cheese. ‘Plenty of honey too per favore then be a brava cuocoina and feed it to me. Then I will explain.’ You offer him the cracker and he tuts at you shaking his head.

‘Uh uh,’ he sighs. ‘Do it properly.’ He pushes the plates to the side and pats the table in front of him. You stand uncertainly but he pats the table again until you sit before him and offer him the cracker a second time. He scoots his chair forward forcing you to spread your legs to accommodate him but now he is in the perfect position for you to place the food in his waiting mouth. He chews slowly, moaning low as the flavours combine and harmonise on his tongue.

‘Mia cuocoina, I think the taleggio now, no?’ You take his suggestion, the rolls of prosciutto and apple are much easier to feed him. He watches you for a moment before continuing. ‘There were clues you see but I did not notice at first. Now though, now your Papa understands.’ You offer him the next bite but his warm hand closes around your wrist holding you in place.

‘You kiss me differently, did you know this? After we have eaten, you like me tasting of food you made me I think.’ You feel like you can’t breathe as he begins listing all the things he has noticed. ‘And my clothes, you look at me differently too, when things get a little tighter, tighter than they used to be. You like seeing how I have changed with every meal you have fed me I think.’ You can’t deny it because what he says is true. A part of you had hoped he might not have noticed everything but with every word that hope gets smaller and smaller.

‘And now here. Your heart is racing and yet all I have done is eat a little from your own hands.’ He pauses to take a bite, his teeth sinking into the soft cheese and crisp apple and just grazing the tip of your fingers. ‘You enjoy feeding me, more than you realise I think.’

‘Papa I …’ You don’t know what to say. He doesn’t look angry or upset but you feel the urge to apologise even as words fail you. He swallows the last bite freeing your wrist.

‘Shhh it is ok mia cuocoina.’ His hands trail down to your ankles tracing miscellaneous shapes into your skin. ‘Cherries now per favore. The balsamic cherries with the mascarpone. His fingers creep up your calves ghosting the shape of you before hooking behind your knees. He pulls you forward until you are sitting at the edge of the table. You lean across him, choosing a butter cracker, the thicker texture better to support the soft cheese.

‘I am craving something sweeter,’ he explains. You bring it to his lips, the cherry juice starting to drip down your fingers and he catches it with his tongue leaving a sticky trail behind it before closing his lips over the mouthful. Your breath catches in your throat and his eyelids droop seductively as he sucks the last traces of juice and cheese from your fingers.

‘That didn’t quite hit the spot,’ he says, hands already sliding your skirt up your thighs until he can clearly see your underwear and the wet patch there is little point trying to hide. ‘Ah so I was right. You do enjoy hand feeding your Papa.’ He spreads your legs even further so he can lean close enough that you feel his steady breathing against you. ‘After all that fuss.’ He grazes his teeth over your clit, the material of your underwear protecting you but the threat still makes your thighs shake. When he does bite down it’s only on the hem of your underwear as he pulls them to the side leaving you bare to him for the first time.

He just looks at first holding you in suspense but in a split second his tongue is all over you yet somehow still not hitting any places you wanted him, needed him. Around and around he swirls his tongue over your folds, then the most gentle suction. Little sounds of enjoyment he seems unaware of that vibrate through you as he tastes you thoroughly. But his teasing as you fed him, his sucking and nipping at your fingers had already got you ready for so much more. Giving in you lace your fingers through his hair to guide him to exactly where you want his attention most but he resists all your attempts, making the frustration inside you build and build. You try another tactic grinding your hips against his face but he pulls away pressing your hips down onto the table and stopping any further movement and forcing a whine from deep in your chest.

‘Cuocoina, please. I am just trying to properly enjoy my meal.’ He pauses to lick a long stripe, tongue flat and broad to give you as much friction as possible. You can’t breathe, not for a moment, the sudden rush of pleasure the only thing your mind can comprehend but almost as soon as it starts it ends the only thing you can feel are the puffs of his warm breath.

‘But perhaps you would prefer to feed me this too?’ He positions himself that he is a hair's breadth away from you before his vice-like grip on your hips loosens. ‘Feed me’ he growls and you have to obey.

You grind your hips against him over and over, his tongue finding your entrance making your thighs shake as you fight to get him even deeper. Your foot loses purchase where it had settled on the arm of his chair and you scream as your clit catches the tip of his nose. One of his hands finds its way to your thigh helping to steady you but the other creeps up your body underneath your dress. He cups your breast over bra, his maddening fingers finding your already hard nipple through the light material pinching and twisting until you can't decide if you want to arch into his teasing hand or push back against his face.

‘Papa! Terzooo,’ you moan his name in frustration, struggling as your pleasure builds to take what you need from him but he finally takes pity on you, hooking both your legs over his shoulders and lifting your hips clean off the table.

‘Fuck mia cuocoina,’ he growls against your core. He sucks your clit long and hard until you scream your toes curling against his back. ‘Sei la cosa migliore che abbia mai assaggiato, cazzo.’ You barely register his switch to Italian, too busy chanting his name in your pleasure fuelled delirium.

You are so close to the edge when his lips close over you sucking and sucking while his tongue swipes over your clit over and over again. You can feel it building, a charge shooting through your nerves from the soles of your feet to the palms of your hand and you continue babbling his name, repeating until it is almost meaningless. He pinches your nipple, hard, and you arch up from the table with a gasp just as he slides a finger inside you curling it perfectly to press against your g spot.

Every bit of air is forced from your lungs as your orgasm overtakes you. Your ears begin to ring as the force of it pulses through your body and what feels like every muscle contracting and releasing as you gasp for air. Your hands are still gripping at his hair keeping him in place not that it is needed as he laps at you greedily, catching every last drop of your orgasm.

‘Making sure you are well fed?’ You giggle deliriously, still feeling somewhat detached from reality. You release your death grip on his hair and he sets your hips back down on the table helping you ease the vice-like grip of your thighs around him. His face is wet with your slick but it only emphasises his flushed cheeks. He grins at you in satisfaction, his eyes sparkling as he takes in the state he has made of you.

He pulls you back upright by your hands after straightening your underwear and your dress but this time no one could mistake the treatment you had just received. Your balance has not yet returned and so helps you into his lap where you can lean against his warm body. As you get settled you can feel his hardness trapped beneath you but as you reach for him cupping him through his trousers, he catches your wrist gently and instead wraps your arms around his neck. He distracts you by stealing kisses and you discover you almost enjoy the taste of you on his lips as much as you enjoy the taste of the food you make him.

He slows your frantic kisses down, only offering you slow pecks to help you actually catch your breath. He rubs your back soothingly over your dress and encourages you to rest against him but you still end up clinging to his shoulders to help keep you upright as the haze of your pleasure recedes leaving you exhausted. He tucks your hair behind your ear, his hand settling at the back of your neck.

‘Mmm, now I am satisfied,’ he whispers against your lips before distracting you again with his captivating kisses.

#papa emeritus iii x reader #terzo x reader #the band ghost fic #terzo #papa iii #papa emeritus iii #it's baaaaaaaaack #there is zero point even apologising now haha but anyway #i hope it was worth the wait #banchetto #my writing

177 notes · View notes

if-whats-new · 8 months ago

Text

What's New In IF? Halloween edition! Issue 27 (2024)

By Brij, Dion, Bex and Jen

Now Available!

Itch.io - Keep Reading below

If you read the zine, consider liking the post: it helps us see how many people see it! And sharing is caring! <3

~ EDITORIAL ~

One Issue just wasn’t enough!

Halloween might be over, but not at WNIF! So here it is, u a second Halloween edition Issue! Next to the regular WNIF stuff we included a recommendation section full of the best games to play in this time of the year, so be sure to check it out.

We want some feedback!

As we’re starting to get a hand of things, we would love some feedback from you guys! What you enjoy, want more or less off, how we could improve... Anything goes! We even have a nifty form!

Still looking for members!

Due to the severe changes in the Zine team, we are once again looking for free hands with a couple of hours to kill, and minds, looking to make a little difference in the community!

If you too would like to help us out in a more official capacity, please shoot us a message! You can check out the available positions here, but if you’d like to help in any other way, feel free to contact us as well! (We added a new position, so check it out!)

No Small Talk for some time!

We hope you have have a fa-boo-lous time reading this issue!

BRIJ, DION, BEX AND JEN

~ BE A PART OF THE ZINE ~

THIS ZINE ONLY HAPPENS WITH YOU!

Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?

WRITE FOR THE COLUMN!

Prefer to be more low-key but still have something to share? Send us a Zine Letter or share a game title for Highlight on…!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Came across something interesting? Know a release or an update announced? Saw an event happening? Whether it's a game, an article, a podcast… Add any IF-related content to our mini-database!

EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!

~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : BITSY JAM ~

Fuu, already #85?

Bitsy is a little engine for little games, worlds, and stories created by Adam Le Doux that makes game making look easier than ever! I mean really! You can use it to make a game in your browser just by drawing it! Thanks to the simple pixelated graphics and limited colour palette you can make basically anything from simple short stories to complicated masterpieces.

The first jam (with a yummy theme: Breakfast) took place on April 8th 2017. Now it’s a monthly occurrence, each time with a new challenging theme that the creators themselves (or even possibly you) get to vote on.

Petrichor, temporary, intentionally bad, tomatoes, no dialogue, long distances, secret place, bitsy fest jam, lost media and waiting are just the ten most recent ones. This month’s theme is game manual - the theme can be the core of the game, or just a small reference. Anything really. The main point of this jam is to have fun and make something! (Just make sure that your game is made in one of these: bitsy, mosi or bipsi.)

So why not give it a shot?

~ ENDED ~

The 6th Spooktober Annual Visual Novel Jam is over, the winners have been announced and you can check out the results!

The Revival Jam 2024 is also over and the results are out!

Strip IF to it’s bare bones and all it become beautiful text. That’s what The Bare-Bones Jam is about. You can now check out all 14 submissions!

Phantasia Jam is a three month-long game jam to create a fantasy narrative game, with the theme of “Hidden Magic”. There’s 17 submissions to check out.

~ ONGOING (VOTING) ~

The voting for ECTOCOMP 2024 has officially started! To vote and participate as a jury, you must do so by giving between 1 to 5 stars on each entry page of the jam. The voting period ends on November 30.

All entries for the Halloween Jam have been submitted and you can now vote for your favourites!

~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~

Disabled Rep VN Jam has a very simple premise but a very important message.

Once upon a time, a game jam was held to create stories around the theme of fairy tales… and that game jam is the Once Upon A Time VN Jam. It’s running from October 1st to January 31st.

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2025 is for all French-speaking enthusiasts. Submissions are accepted until March 3rd 2025.

Are you perhaps a fan of more somber, melancholic themes? Then check out the Dying Year - Visual Novel Jam! You have until the end of the year to participate.

The Black Visual Novel Jam is all about working with creative professional developers who work in visual novels to bring more Black stories to life. The goal is to create a space where Black creators can show their unique storytelling through visual novels.

Bare your teeth and sharpen your claws because the Monstrous Desires 2024 Visual Novel Jam is here! Dedicated to the love of entities, horrors, and monstrosities, this jam will be full of romantic Visual Novels (VN) that heavily focus on a monster may it be original or from classics, folklore, modern media, etc.

The October Bitsy Jam is here! The theme is game manual and you have until November 11th to submit your projects.

~ OTHER ~

Jams are a great way to find new games! Don’t be afraid to check out submissions from previous years as well. There might be some gems hiding between them!

~ NEW RELEASE ~

Trick-or-Treat (Twine) is all about virtual trick-or-treating, grab your costume and have fun! @softest-punk

The Traded Groom (Unity) is a romance story where you marry a man you’ve never met. @maneki-mushi

Lydia’s Labyrinth (Ren’Py) is a choose your own adventure where you try to get to the end of the labyrinth. @doublefreegames

The end of an obsession is a fictional sequel work to It gets so lonely here.

The Virus Game HALLOWEEN is here.

In Ghostship Delgado (Amstrad CPC) you find yourself on the quarter deck of a mysterious, seemingly abandoned historic ship…

As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!

~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~

Camp Maple Wind (Ren’Py), you saw your sister die there 18 years ago and now you decided to return as the new camp counselor. @tailorfae

Dusk and Dawn (CScript) is a urban fantasy inspired by CYOA’s like Slayers V4. You’ve failed college, what do you do now? @tuskhansworld

Circus Eyes of God (Twine) is a horror interactive fiction where you decide to join a mysterious circus. @circuseyesofgod-if

In Tether (Twine) your an interpreter for a new lord under the occupation of another country. Will you rebel? @runcriedthecrawlingif

Return back to your hometown where you and your friends used to be team of detectives until the incident.... in Return to Misty Cove (CScript) @fluorescent-if

In Red River Academy (CScript) you and your group of friends are murdered in cold blood. But you were brought back, is this a second chance at life? @bratlinwrites

You step out for some fresh air, only to find yourself lost and stranded in the forest overnight in Fickle Solitude (Twine)

In Ice Cream For Love you are a bearfolk ice cream maker. However the newest dietitian-in-training has problems with your product. @atelierursine

In Demon Daycare (Ren’Py) you’ll have to baby the adult demon prince Belphegor. Hope the money is good!

~ UPDATES ~

Devil's Liminal (Ren’Py) released Chapter 2.

Crown of Exile (Twine) Vinia Path is released on Patreon. @ramonag-if

Tales of Wocdes: The Silver Protector (Twine) heritage features have been updated. @tales-of-wocdes

College Tennis: Origin Story (CScript) added halloween bonus to Ko-Fi. @collegetennisoriginstory

Sins of the Crown (CScript) added new content to their demo. @pariahinteractive

The King's Hound (Twine) released a rewritten demo. @the-kingshound

The Mighty Shifter (CScript) released Chapters 4 & 5. @miss-briar-novels

Lucid fate (Twine) released Chapters 3 & 4.5. @lucid-fate-if

Eldritch Tales: Inheritance (CScript) released the final part of Chapter 2.

Saturnine (CScript) added new content to their demo. @satur9-if

Shattered: Oblivion (CScript) reworked their prologue.

Strings of Fate (CScript) released partial Chapter 3.

Text Your Life (Ren’Py) added Chapter 2 Day 1 to their demo.

The Good People (Na Doine Maithe) (Ren’Py) released the first five chapters of Shae and Maeve's routes. @moiraimyths

Tri City Monsters (Ren’Py) released Chapter 3 for Akello. @tricitymonsters

Bridge Ices Before Road (CScript) added new content to their Prologue. @bridgeicesbeforeroadif

Aphni's Quartet: Nightbloom's Veil (Twine) released Chapter 2. @marblesstorystudio

The Brightest Stars (CScript) added the first part of Chapter 3 to their demo. @brightest-stars-if

Weeping Gods (CScript) added new content to their demo. @jcollinswrites

~ OTHER ~

The Kickstarter for Keyframes has started, and even though the main goal has been reached there are still some stretch goals! @blankhouse

The ChoiceBeat Zine Issue 12 is out. We thank them for mentioning our Zine! Go check it out!

Amare Fortnightly Bulletin Issue 27 is here for all your romance needs! @amaregames

Never Gives up Her Dead has released a deluxe version of their game.

The People's House has been officially submitted for publication.

As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks.

If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!

~ MAYBE YOU NEXT? ~

We did not get a submission this week. But if you have an idea for a short essay, or would like a special space to share your thoughts about IF and the community...

Shoot us an email!

~ HIGHLIGHT ON ~

A couple of games that we thought were cool.

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserves some highlighting?

An old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone?

Tell us about it! And it might appear here!

H/T = Horror/Thriller H = Halloween themes S = Supernatural C = Creepy

~ RECOMMENDATIONS (COMPLETE) ~

Halloween Scrooge (H) by Vanade of Hamilton Hour (Ren’Py)

A short Halloween spin on A Christmas Carol... and you can flirt with the ghosts! //submitted by anon//

Killer Chat (H/T) by @rosesrotofficial (???)

After asking too many murder-related questions online (for your book), you get an invite to a... serial killer chatroom?! What the fuck?

A Zombie Head Went Missing at the Party Full of CUTE MONSTER GIRLS!? (S) by MaroonDrops (???)

Half gorgon Jade Mason finds herself dragged to a party full of monsters, she doesn't have high hopes.

Therapy with Dr. Albert Krueger (H/T) by dino999z (Ren'Py)

Has work been feeling more tiring than usual?

Your mood, confusing and uneasy?

Then it sounds like you need our newly patented ★DREAM THERAPY★!

A Series of Interactive Stories Where No Matter What You Do You Are Immediately Killed by a Werewolf (S) by Luke Burns (Twine)

The name just says it all.

AL - A Choose Your Own Adventure (H/T) by Gabriel Cornish (Twine)

You are a student going on their first date in a long, long time. Only problem is your apartment is trying to kill you with your own clutter!

Spooble: A Search Engine Story (H/T) by All the bees (Unity)

Are babies supposed to do that?

Cal's Costume Conundrum!! (H) by amarvelous (Ren’Py)

Which costume is the best? Cal needs to know! Infiltrate her siblings’ Halloween party, interview the guests, and crown a winner!

Restore, Reflect, Retry (H/T) by Natalia Theodoridou (CScript)

This is a haunted game about a haunted game. You've played this game before. You may not remember, but the game does.

Model Employee (H/T ) by Nth Circle (Unity)

If you want to get ahead in your career, you gotta be willing to take some risks.

Contrition (H/T) by akfedeau (Twine)

As a priest, it’s your job to listen to your parishioners’ darkest secrets and absolve their guilt. But when a sinister stranger comes to the confessional one Halloween night, you realize it’s your soul on the line.

Quoth the Raven… (C) by gamedevillibrarian (???)

Edgar Allen Poe's 'The Raven', with some spooky ambiance. What else do you need?

Hallowmoor (H) by Mike Snyder (Twine)

Your quest: infiltrate Castle Hallowmoor, find the potion, and make it out alive.

Keeper’s Curse (H/T) by CParadis777 (Godot)

Stranded on a remote island after your Lightkeeper duty has ended you must ration and scavenge for supplies while awaiting your delayed relief crew.

Dicentra (H/T) by caffeine (Ren’Py)

You play as Basil, a young boy lost in a forest of watchful trees and unfriendly guides.

Tales from Castle Balderstone by Ryan Veeder (Inform7)

This is Castle Balderstone, and tonight is the night when the greatest spook-crafters convene to share their hair-raising handiwork with each other.

Muertos by Medley Games (Twine)

You are a lost undead wandering the Aztec afterlife, only to come across a strange city.

Dawn of the Damned (H/T) by Melancholy Marionette (Unity)

Anxious to attend your job interview at Aurora Antiques, you arrive to discover a room full of melancholy mannequins. One, in particular, captures your interest, drawing you closer.

Seance (S) by Alex Rose (???)

A murder case has gone cold, and the NRPD has asked you to help them solve it, on account of your abilities as a psychic medium.

~ RECOMMENDATIONS (WIP) ~

Samsara (H/T + S) by Amelia (???)

After being killed by the same hands in every past life you decide to take your killer's life instead. //submitted by anon//

Parasitical (H/T) by @parasitical-if (CScript)

You grew up under the masked faces of their Exalted, under the stories of Earth past. Rusted metal and cracked plastic; His bone and His flesh. Conflicting worlds, conflicting times, and soon, it might all come to a head.

Seven days in Purgatory (H/T) by @sevendaysinpurgatory-if (CScript)

Seven days in Purgatory is a psychological thriller ripe with philosophical musings and sensuality.

Taste, hear, think, feel, love… Run. //recommended by Dion [team]//

Did we miss your favourite game? Don’t worry, there’s still a chance! Fill out this form and we will include it in our regular Highlight on.... section!

WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WHETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN...

Thank you for keep updating! I really don't want to miss any IF updates but it's hard to find everything. So thank you for all the effort.

@waywardartisanoafhound-blog

Have something to say? Send us a message titled: Zine Letter!

As we end this issue, we would like to thank:

our awesome anons! For sending us their game recommendations!

And a special thanks to Bex [team] for all the work she’s done for the zine.

And as always, huge thanks to all you readers who liked, shared, and commented on last week's issue! What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us!

Thank you for cheering us on this journey!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It come with sad news that me (Bex) is having to leave the Zine….for now at least.

I joined back in August and honestly it was crazy time, especially with the sad passing of Marjorie. I honestly enjoyed what we’ve made of it and don’t regret it in the slightest. Life has sadly go in the way of me and I just don’t have the time to continue you this on. I’m hoping the New Year will bring peace and with it me back to the Zine.

Love you all ❣

And we will see you next week in our traditional colours!

BRIJ, DION, BEX, JEN

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 27

139 notes · View notes

enwoso · 1 year ago

Note

could we have a hc or a short blurb about Alessia’s birth with Grumpy?

new arrival | alessia russo x child!reader

grumpy masterlist

🌸 alessia was over being pregnant, she wanted nothing more than to meet her little one. the sore back, swollen feet and the needing to pee after every single minute was boring now. she wanted to start her motherhood life now.

🌸 so when she started getting contractions, a small part of her was really relieved but every single other part of her was in a serious amount of pain.

🌸 her mum, carol, stayed by her side the entire time during the delivery while her dad, mario and two brothers giorgio and luca awaited the news of their new addition to the family at home.

🌸 “mum, i can’t- it hurts too much” “yes you can less, your the strongest person i know!”

🌸 after a very long and grueling five hours of active labour, but ultimately a very smooth birth. smoother than alessia had been expected having had every complication outcome scenario planned out in her head just in case. however thankfully they weren’t needed and finally alessia’s lovie was being placed onto her chest as small cries filled the room.

🌸 alessia just looking at you with so much love. as she took in all your features, your tiny hands, small pink lips and your little button nose as well as the small amount of hair that was on your head. in alessia’s eyes you were perfect.

🌸 “oh alessia she’s gorgeous! she’s even got your nose!” carol would point out as alessia would nod, her eyes bubbling with tears — happy ones though.

🌸 alessia’s dad and brothers rushing into the room talking loud and excitedly as carol shushed them in case it startled you, the three taking in your tiny form and you were passed to her dad for him to hold before alessia’s brothers.

🌸 the topic of your name, soon came around but alessia had already settled on your name months ago before you were born however wanting to be sure and seeing your little face she knew that your name would suit you perfectly.

🌸 “i’m already the favourite uncle! she just gave me a small smile” gio would tease his older brother who would just roll his eyes as alessia and her parents would laugh at their antics.

🌸 “i really hate to burst your bubble gio but she’s probably just hungry— and i don’t think newborns can smile just yet!” alessia would point out, as you would be passed back to your mum. it just about being time for your feed.

#alessia russo x reader #alessia russo x y/n #alessia russo #woso community #woso x reader #woso #woso imagine #woso blurbs #arsenal women #awfc #arsenal wfc #awfc imagine #england wnt #england women #england #lionesses #leah williamson x reader #enwoso

363 notes · View notes

lynnie-ee · 9 months ago

Text

Day 7; Sweater.

╰┈➤"Sharing clothes with your partner is nice, you could say. But also quite useful to let others know you're already taken, and Cater knew that very well."

╰►Gender neutral reader, oneshot, 1,7k words.

╰► Character: Cater Diamond.

╰►Note: The prompts are based on words I found interesting and then I put them on a roulette to decide when I would write about them, lol. English is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any grammatical mistakes <3. Not proof read, I haven't written in a long time, so I apologise if anything is out of character.

Yes, I know I'm behind by 2 days. Yes, I'll catch up when biochemistry stops taking all my time.

╰►Masterlist / Inktober Masterlist.

⤿

Crewel’s classes were as entertaining as they were complicated, it was something widely known across Night Raven College.

Now, as (Y/n) stared at the board, they wondered how they could find the day's topic so interesting and fascinating even when they didn't understand even a word of what their teacher said.

As they kept debating whether they were stupid or just tired from all the assignments of the week, their phone suddenly vibrated in their pocket, making them quickly turn the screen on to see who was talking to them, finding a text from none other than their boyfriend, Cater.

‘Heeey, baby! What time do you get out of class?'

‘Like in 15 minutes, why?’

‘Nothing, I just want to see you<3’

“Pup, perhaps my class is interrupting the conversation on your cell phone? Or can I continue with it?” Crewel’s Stern voice made the Prefect leave their phone down, their gaze immediately going up to meet the frowning expression of their teacher.

“Yes, I apologize. Please continue sir, it won’t happen again.”

“That’s what I expected. Well, as I was saying…”

Soon enough, the bell rang to signal the end of the class, and the beginning of the lunch hour. The Prefect packed their things, leaving the classroom promptly along with Ace, Deuce and Grim, immediately encountering Cater as soon as they got out of the salon.

“We’ll meet you at the cafeteria.” Ace mumbled, already walking away to avoid watching how 'lovey-dovey', as he said, Cater became in the presence of the Prefect.

“Oh, Cater, how are you doing? I didn’t think you’d come to pick me up to my class.” The magicless student commented, smiling happily as the Heartslabyul third-year pressed a soft kiss to their lips.

“Like I said, I just really wanted to see you.” He replied chuckling, suddenly looking as if he remembered something. “It’s been quite cold these days, so I thought I might bring this for my lovely partner.”

“Is that your sweater?” The Prefect asked, as their boyfriend extended the red cardigan he usually wore back at his dorm, which was adorned by an embroidery of his characteristic diamond figure. As he nodded enthusiastically, the Ramshackle student promptly took off their blazer to replace it with the softness of the sweater.

“You look sooo cute, darling. I knew you’d look gorgeous with it.” The third year spoke cheerfully, but (Y/n) was able to spot something different about his demeanour, even if they couldn’t think about what was it exactly. “Let’s take a picture!” He suggested cheerily, quickly taking his phone out to take a quick selfie that probably would end up on his Magicam page.

“Does the picture look good?”

“Of course, stunning as always, darling! But the boys are probably still waiting for you at the cafeteria, don’t make them wait for too long. See you after class?”

“Yeah, I’ll text you when I finish my last class.” They bid goodbye briefly, and then the Ramshackle student resumed their way towards the cafeteria.

“Henchman, you smell weird.” Was the first thing Grim told them as soon as they seated at their usual spot at the table, making (Y/n) curious.

“You think? It’s probably because of Cater’s sweater, he wears a lot of perfume sometimes.” They mumbled nonchalantly, taking out their lunchbox to grab the sandwich they prepared beforehand.

“I don’t think he puts that much on his clothes, usually.” Deuce mumbled in between as he ate.

“Maybe he just felt like it today, who knows.” The magicless student settled the topic, as they quickly started to talk about other things, their lunch going as usual.

Not long after that, they came back to the classroom to attend their last class of the day, but as the Prefect went to their usual seat, they found a messily folded note on their desk.

‘Meet me outside the botanical garden after class.’

The rest of their classes went smoothly, as (Y/n) successfully managed to prevent Grim from falling asleep between lessons and prevented Ace from being discovered by Trein, as he was playing games on his phone instead of paying attention.

As the class finished, the Prefect told Ace and Deuce to go without them, asking them if they could watch Grim for a while as they had some errands to do, and after some negotiation (promising food to them if they accepted), they took the small beast as the Ramshackle student texted their boyfriend that they’ll take a bit longer before being free, but suggesting to meet at the courtyard later.

Then, they walked towards the botanical garden, as the note asked. The magicless student was well aware that it probably was some sort of joke of maybe someone wanting to ask them a favour, but either way, their curiosity got the best of them, motivating them to go anyway.

“Prefect, you actually came.” They heard a voice when they arrived at the Botanical Garden. As they turned around to see who was speaking, they were quick to recognize a first-year beastman from Savannaclaw. He was a dorm mate of Jack, they remembered, as he was one of the few students from that dorm who weren’t straight-up rude towards them at first.

“Well, you requested me for me to be here.” They mumbled, walking towards the student to talk properly.

“Yes, that’s because I-” The student interrupted himself, his demeanour suddenly changing when (Y/n) was close to observe the frown on his face, his features showing sudden distress and maybe even a tint of disappointment.

“Is there something the matter?” (Y/n) questioned with a confused expression, watching the beastman clear his throat as if regaining his composure, looking away from them.

“I...I apologize for making you come all the way here, I just wanted to ask you for your History of Magic notes, if you could lend them to me for a few days.”

“Oh, of course, I’ve got no problem with that.” The Ramshackle student answered nonchalantly, even if they felt like that wasn’t the reason they were called for. “That was all?”

“Yes, thank you for your time.”

“You finished your errands?” The third-year asked with his usual smile, as he extended his arms towards the Prefect, who nodded as an answer, extending their own arm to lace their hands together. “Anything…interesting happened?”

“Don’t worry, just remind me to give you my notes for the next class. See you.” They bid him goodbye as they walked back towards the main building, specifically the courtyard, where they spotted a certain redhead immediately.

“Not really, why?”

“Nothing, I was just curious.”

They started to walk towards the hall of mirrors, as they usually spent time in Cater’s room after class, sometimes watching movies, studying or even taking a nap, when the day was too tiring.

“Your errands surely must have been exhausting to you, sweetheart. Did you see someone unexpected around?” He asked one more time, still with his usual relaxed voice, even if it didn’t match the slight stiffness on his hand.

“You’re being awfully curious today, Cater. Is there any possibility you want to ask me something in particular?” (Y/n) questioned, stopping their walk so they could stand in front of their boyfriend.

“Hm, not really, darling, why would I?” He reassured, his smile adorning his features as if to mask his nervous demeanour.

“We’ve talked about this quite a lot already, my love, if you want to tell me something, you can do it.” The Prefect mumbled, moving their hand towards his arms to offer support.

“…Well, there might be a tiny little thing I might have heard today.”

“Did you?”

“Nothing serious, really! I probably misheard, so let’s go to Heartslabyul already-”

“I want to know what you heard.” (Y/n) stated, their voice steady but genuine, making Cater sigh.

“Well, maybe I heard some Savanaclaw first-years talking on my way to class. And mayyybe, just maybe, I heard one of them telling his friend that he’d…maybe, confess to you today.” He muttered the last part with a lower voice, which didn’t match the relaxed expression on his face that the Prefect recognized to be forced.

“…Did you hear anything about the Botanical Garden?”

“…Maybe.”

“Well, that explains some things.” The Prefect sighed, recalling briefly their encounter with the Savannaclaw first-year merely minutes ago, until they realised something. “Is that why you gave me your sweater today?” They frowned slightly, not mad at all, and mostly just curious, but quickly confirming their theory as Cater’s face suddenly seemed startled.

They should have known by the way the poor boy seemed so disappointed when they got close enough for him to catch on the smell from the sweater that was obviously not theirs, but it had been ignored by them until now.

“Wait there, can’t a boy give their sweater to their partner on a cold day? Geez, I wanted to be nice, darling.”

“A sweater that was conveniently showered in your perfume, that would conveniently make a beastman know that I’m already dating someone? Quite a way to mark territory, besides all the pictures you post of me on your Magicam.” (Y/n) commented, chuckling after they saw Cater’s cheeks blush slightly.

“…That first-year doesn’t even have Magicam, how was he even supposed to know you already have a lovely boyfriend, hm?”

“I could have told him, if he had tried to confess.” They responded immediately, taking his hand. “I’m more than capable of pushing people away if they try to go after me, I’ll tell them right away that I have the most cute and caring boyfriend in this entire school, okay? Even if he gets a bit anxious sometimes.” They reassured, as Cater looked away.

“I’m sorry if it seemed like I was doubting that you could do so.”

“Don’t worry, I get it. Just talk to me and it’ll be fine.” The Prefect smiled softly as the third-year nodded, promptly moving his arm to involve them in a brief hug, that seemed to comfort him. “Now, we still have the rest of the evening to relax, don’t we? Let’s go to Heartslabyul before the boys go drop Grim at Ramshackle.”

“Haha, okay, okay. What kind of movie do you want to watch?”

“A romantic comedy!”

Cater gazed at them for a few seconds, observing the brightness of their smile and the affection that their eyes held when looking at him, making him wonder how he was lucky to find someone so understanding of him. A lot of people would compliment him and praise him on his Magicam posts, but only one spoke to him genuinely and out of love.

“Sure thing, baby.”

⤿

#twst #twisted wonderland x reader #disney twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland oneshot #disney twst #twst x you #twisted wonderland cater #twst oneshot #twst cater #cater diamond #cater diamond x reader #lynnie's post

105 notes · View notes

primofate · 1 year ago

Text

Off Topic from Genshin for a moment,

Can I just rant about an Otome game I recently rediscovered.

If any of you know Prince of Tennis, this is a Prince of Tennis otome game for the DS called: Prince of Tennis Motto Gakuensai no Oujisama

You have a potential of 37. YES 37 guys to date, all characters from Prince of Tennis.

It's a very simple game, but whoever the writers were, they knew what we ladies wanted lol.

Spoilers about the game and gameplay below the cut

First off, you can choose which school you go to. Prince of Tennis is kind of like Haikyuu, but with tennis. So if you're interested in a certain character, you would have to choose to go to their school.

Second, the story is totally something a fan author would write lol. It's totally a Y/N moment. You're part of the school festival committee and you're helping the tennis team build and manage their booth for the school festival. The story only spans I think, 2 weeks in game and if you really speed run it, in real time it would take around 30 minutes to an hour to finish one guy.

The way to romance a guy is pretty simple, and also very slice of life type. There's no complicated backstory, since you're just an average high school girl. Basically you just try to keep talking to the guy you're interested in and you get to know each other in the span of those 2 weeks. Sounds boring right?

But the dialogue in some of the routes is extremely fluffy.

Example: There's at least ONE scene where the guy worries about you.

One of them is when it's a particularly hot day during the school festival and you pass out. Cue the guy panicking and taking you to the infirmary, worried sick.

One of the other scenes involved the guy getting into a fist fight with another student and your character sort of tries to stop them and gets in between but instead you get hit (yes, really) So your guy is obviously panicking and angry. (The dialogue for the guy went something a bit like "...I can't believe you got in between us and got hit! I don't know what I would do if you--" and then he cuts off there cause guy hasn't confessed to you yet)

AND THEN there's another one where you go into the storage room with the guy and you're trying to find something in one of the boxes, but the box is too high and it ends up almost falling on you but you somehow evade it, except that you now have a sprained ankle. And then, of course, the guy is again extremely worried.

I'm not even kidding about how angsty/fluffy some of these scenes are. Like, I'm rambling! and remember there are 37 DIFFERENT GUYS WITH DIFFERENT SCENARIOS! (Actually I could probably get some writing ideas off of these lollll)

I am SO glad I found this game again (Playing it on a DS Emulator and I patched the game so that it was translated to English)

#prince of tennis #tennis no oujisama #prince of tennis fluff

266 notes · View notes

elgascreamslikehell · 8 days ago

Text

So i promised to write something every day for this week and I'm doing so

Today's piece and I swear I'm not even in the middle of this and still it's already ~20k.... It's gonna be long story i guess

Chris smiles and shines like a fresh dime when Eddie's putting his bags into the trunk. Summer camp surely was a great idea, thinks Eddie. Chris looks happy and tan and he talks nonstop for half an hour and hadn't asked about Buck once. Actually that's kinda a big deal. ‘...and then we tried to live in the forest and you know what there are mushrooms you can eat raw and moreover the stars oh dad the stars here are amazing back home you can't even imagine how big and bright they are and I wish we can watch it together I can teach you constellations and….’- he stops and looks to the ground ‘And?’ - ‘And I think Buck would also love that and it could have been great to have a big picnic here together but I know he doesn't like us anymore’

Evan fucking Buckley is the biggest jerk Eddie knows. The biggest jerk Eddie somehow still loves, hell he should end this anyhow, at least for Chris

‘He likes you a lot. He asked about you regularly!’- that's true. That's the only topic Buck's used to have a conversation with Eddie lately. That and… His lips taste like cinnamon and Eddie definitely will lose what he has left of his sanity if he doesn't stop thinking about that

‘His boyfriend called me once. Sent some crutches to choose from…’- ‘And?’ Eddie fights himself not to start swearing - ‘And I told him we're not up for charity… and sent him some traffic rules books on Amazon instead’. Dios Eddie couldn't love Christopher more but he really needs to work with his attitude. Eddie laughs: ‘That was rude, you know that, right?’ - ‘He sent Buck to the hospital bed, how could I not? And as I know you hit him for that’ - ‘I hit him not for that. Well, not only for that. Chris, you were in the same car, before you texted me I was spiraling losing my mind. You know I couldn't live without you? You are my life and I love you’- ‘And Buck?’

Eddie rolls his eyes and bites his lip: ‘What about Buck?’ - ‘You love him. Right before the accident Sam and Buck were arguing. About you having a crush on Buck. So do you?’ - ‘That's…complicated, Chris. And you're too young for that stuff anyway.’ - ‘I just… I wanted Buck to be a part of our family. Before. Cause I thought he could make you happy. But he obviously can't, so… I don't think we need him. Or anyone else. We're good on our own, right, dad? We have Carla and Peppa! And Maddie and Jee Yun’ - it could be a problem, thinks Eddie but only for a moment. No, it couldn't. Maddie, unlike her brother, is very much not an idiot. Chris meanwhile proceeds: ‘And maybe we can also have a dog…’ - Eddie tries his best to pull himself together and smile: ‘So that's what that was about. You just want a dog? We'll discuss it when you finish your chores in one day at least once’ - He hugs Chris tight and opens the car door for him. They are gonna be fine. His son is a miracle. Regalo de Dios.

Buck is an idiot.

Taglist!

@pirrusstuff @steadfastsaturnsrings @idealuk @maddieee0415 @avi-mi @eveseversomessyblog @amymarchsupporter

#eddie diaz #buddie #evan buckley #buck x eddie #buddie 911 #911 buddie #ryu is writing stuff #911 fic

20 notes · View notes

touchtheinvisiblestars · 2 months ago

Text

Close To Home Part Four

Part 3

I will find a better gif for this part! But I do love this one.

***

The late afternoon air had cooled just enough to feel like fall was inching closer. You and Joel walked side by side, coffee shop coming into view as the easy rhythm of your steps matched. It wasn’t awkward—just quiet in a way that felt natural, like neither of you needed to fill the silence unless it felt right.

As you pulled open the door, the scent of roasted coffee beans and something sweet in the oven wrapped around you. Joel held the door without a word, the brush of his arm as you passed him sending a flicker of awareness through you.

“This okay?” you asked, glancing at the cozy little café tucked into the corner of the street. Low lighting, soft music, and the quiet murmur of people made it feel safe—calm.

Joel nodded with a small smile. “Yeah. Nice spot. Beats the noise of a bar.”

You stepped up to the counter together, each ordering your drinks—yours something with oat milk and cinnamon, his plain and black, no-nonsense. When the barista handed over your cups, you found a table by the window, slipping into the seat across from him.

“Thank you for suggesting this- I actually had quite a stressful day.”

“Yeah? Teaching stuff?” he asked, casually sipping his coffee.

“Yep. End of the semester chaos. Lots of caffeine and secondhand glitter from craft projects.”

He smiled, really smiled, and you were struck again by how natural it felt talking to him—even now, days later. There wasn’t that awkwardness some second meetings had. If anything, it was like something had just been put on pause and picked up again.

You ended up sitting there for well over an hour, falling into conversation about music, books, bad movies, childhood stories. He was quieter than you, but when he did speak, it was with this sort of careful sincerity that made every word feel deliberate.

At some point, the conversation drifted to the topic of family.

“So,” you said, leaning back in your chair, “you said you had a brother- did I hear that right?”

Joel nodded, setting his cup down. “Yeah. One brother. Tommy.”

“Yes I remember.” you spoke softly, memories flooding back from the night you met. “You work together too?”

“Well remembered, we do. Tommy drives me nuts sometimes, but he’s a good guy. Alway there for me when I need him.”

You smiled, tucking that little detail away. You liked that he was close with his brother. It fit with the kind of man he seemed to be—steady, rooted, loyal.

After a pause, he added, “I’ve got a daughter, too.”

That caught your attention. Not in a bad way—just a small jolt of realisation. You hadn’t even considered it.

“Oh,” you said, careful to keep your tone neutral but open. “Yeah?”

He nodded. “She’s great. Smart. Keeps me on my toes.”

“That’s awesome. How old is she?”

Joel looked out the window for a second, like he was weighing something, then gave a half-smile. “Old enough to have opinions about everything.”

You laughed. “So… a kid, then.”

“Very much so.”

He didn’t offer more than that, and you didn’t push. Maybe he was just protective. It wasn’t odd—especially not for someone with a kid.

Still, something in the way he said it lingered with you. Like there was more he could’ve said. But it didn’t feel like a wall—just a door he hadn’t opened yet.

You hesitated before asking, “Is her mom still around?”

There was a shift in the air. Subtle, but it was there. Joel’s expression didn’t change much, but you could see it—something tightened behind his eyes. His fingers flexed slightly on the cup before he set it down.

“No,” he said simply. “She’s not in the picture.” Then, after a beat, “Hasn’t been for a long time.”

You nodded, sensing this wasn’t a topic he liked to linger on. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“You’re not,” he said quickly. “Just... it’s complicated history. Not somethin’ I talk about much.”

You gave him space. Let the silence sit comfortably between you for a moment before you spoke again. “Well, for what it’s worth... I’m not worried. About there being someone else.”

His mouth quirked into something that might have been a smile. “There’s no one else,” he said. “You don’t have to worry about that. Especially not her mom. That chapter closed a long time ago.”

There was something solid in the way he said it. Something tired, too. You didn’t push for more. He’d given you enough.

You reached for your cup again, offering a gentle smile. “I appreciate you telling me.”

Joel nodded, eyes meeting yours. “You deserve honesty. Even when it’s the tough kind.”

And just like that, the conversation shifted back to easier ground. He made you smile so much your cheeks were hurting. Talking to him made all the pressures of the day just melt away. Before you left, you both exchanged numbers. This time, no missed chances.

***

It didn’t take long for a rhythm to fall into place.

You and Joel didn’t get to meet again that week—not with your school throwing itself into end-of-semester chaos and his work hours running long. But somehow, that didn’t seem to matter.

He texted.

Not the bare minimum kind of texting, either. Not just “good morning” or “how was your day,” but real thoughts—little stories from his jobs, music he thought you’d like, a photo of a broken window he’d fixed with a proud “she’s a beauty now.”

You found yourself looking forward to the buzz of your phone more than you cared to admit.

Joel:

Tommy nearly took his thumb off today. Still insisted on driving us to lunch like he wasn’t bleeding all over the steering wheel.

You:

Tell Tommy he’s dramatic and reckless, and I’ll send him a sticker chart if he manages not to injure himself next week.

Joel:

He’d probably hang it up in the truck.

Sometimes it was light and playful. Other times it ran deeper—quiet messages late at night, when the world was calm and honesty came easier.

Joel:

Do you ever feel like you’re good at what you do, but never actually caught up? Like you’re just... barely keeping it together?

You’d stared at that one for a while before replying.

You:

Yes. Every single day.

Joel:

Yeah. Figured maybe you’d get it.

There was a closeness blooming between the lines, something that felt far more intimate than the one night you’d spent tangled in sheets and sleep. There were whole evenings you spent curled on your couch, smiling at your phone like some hopeless teenager.

You kept telling yourself to be cautious. You barely knew him.

But the truth was: it felt like you were getting to know him more with every message.

At school, your days blurred together. There were field trips to plan, standardised tests to plan, and a million little things that took up every corner of your brain. You barely noticed how your routine shifted—how your phone stayed just within reach, how your smile lingered longer after lunch.

There were moments you thought about him in the middle of your day—writing a note to a student, picking up supplies, sipping coffee in the break room. You’d wonder what he was doing right then, if he was thinking of you too.

But still, with the holidays neither of you could find the time to meet again.

Every plan turned into:

“Raincheck?”

“Next week?”

“Work’s a mess. I’m sorry.”

“I can't tonight. I’m sorry.”

It wasn’t disappointing. Not really. Because even with the distance, he didn’t fade.

He stayed present.

He stayed real.

***

#joel miller au #joel x reader #joel miller #joel miller x reader #the last of us #the last of us imagine #the last of us au

27 notes · View notes

petercapaldi-press · 25 days ago

Text

INTERVIEW / ARTICLE

‘I’m from Glasgow – the swearing came naturally!’ The full uncensored history of The Thick of It

Sun 18 May, 2025

By Tim Jonze

It was the political satire that gave us omnishambles, pet asbos and the terrifying Malcolm Tucker. Two decades on, creator Armando Iannucci and stars including Peter Capaldi and Rebecca Front lift the lid on its chaotic creation

Peter Capaldi as Malcolm Tucker from The Thick of It. Composite: BBC/Mike Hogan

Twenty years ago this month we were plunged straight into the middle of an omnishambles. It was a moment in time when petrified politicians lurched from crisis to crisis, scrambling desperately to control the narrative as their endless gaffes derailed even the vaguest attempts to change this country for the better. But am I talking about the tail-end of the Blair years or the televisual tour-de-force that was Armando Iannucci’s The Thick of It?

It could be either. It could even be right now – such was the show’s prescient genius. This was a satire that didn’t just mimic the government’s calamities but seemed somehow to foresee them. Over its seven-year run, The Thick of It came up with farcical policies that the government went on to adopt (pet asbos, anyone?), coined new words in the dictionary (the aforementioned omnishambles) and, in Malcolm Tucker, created one of the great malevolent forces of British comedy. Here’s how they did it …

Armando Iannucci, creator The idea for The Thick of It came after I’d done a 2004 documentary about Yes Minister for the BBC. I rewatched every episode and realised that all the topics it covered were still relevant: Europe, the threat of terrorism, austerity … everything! But I also noticed that the power dynamics had shifted. In the mid-Blair years it felt like it was less about the minister being thwarted by their senior civil servant and more about the ministers coming under constant pressure from No 10 and its enforcers to stick to the agenda.

Adam Tandy, producer For a while it was just called “Westminster-based Comedy”.

Iannucci I got in touch with politicos, ex-ministers, former civil servants, political journalists, insiders, outsiders. I said: “I’m not here for scandal, I want the boring stuff!” I wanted to know who gets in first, who’s last to leave, what is the relationship with civil servants, who would take a call from the Daily Mail? And the big revelation for me was how much the country was being run by 22-year-olds. Cabinet ministers were bringing in these junior spads because they thought they were so clever and bright but actually they were just confident. They’d never fixed a car or bought a house or really done anything complicated. Which is why you’d get a lot of these ideas that only sounded good on paper like “beacons of excellence” and “hospital clusters”.

Office politics … (from left) James Smith, Chris Addison, Rebecca Front, Peter Capaldi and Joanna Scanlan in The Thick of It. Photograph: BBC

Jamie Cairney, director of photography Armando’s opening gambit was: this cannot be like a traditional BBC comedy. He wanted to forget all of the Hollywood drama conventions. One of his reference points was The News from Number 10, a documentary about Alastair Campbell which was really messy because everything’s running at a million miles an hour. And another reference point was [Danish drama] Festen, the first Dogme 95 film. He even said: “I want you to try and adhere to the Dogme 95 vows of chastity” – things like “cameras must be handheld” and “you can only use natural light”. Very anti-establishment stuff!

Iannucci BBC Four had a small budget, I think less than £100k. They said: what can you do with it? The constraints of the budget actually helped. It forced me to be quite experimental.

Ian Martin, swearing consultant I was doing a satirical website with my brother Paul called martian.fm, and one of the things I wrote every week was this thing called Hansard Late. It was written in the style of the proceedings of the House of Commons, but it was also very sweary, like “I would respectfully ask the Honourable Gentleman to shove it up his cock” or whatever. I got an email saying: “Hi, I’m Armando Iannucci, your stuff makes me laugh, want to do some stuff for me?”. Obviously I thought it was a spoof!

Iannucci I wanted something that felt like you were eavesdropping on something you’re not meant to see. That’s how we came up with the title: you are really in the thick of it.

Peter Capaldi, played director of communications Malcolm Tucker It was hard to get any details about it. I asked if there was a script and they said no. That doesn’t give you very much confidence, does it? What are we supposed to do if you don’t have a script? Armando said just improvise. OK, well, I hated improvising because generally improvising means that the person with the biggest ego gets the biggest part. The only reason I hung on in there was because I really liked Armando’s previous work.

Sarah Crowe, casting director I’d worked with Armando before on Partridge and so whenever I’d see people try out for other things like theatre or commercials, I’d make a little note to say “Armando would like”. The cast came from all different places: kids’ television, theatre, standup … I’d even cast Alex Macqueen, who played Julius, in an Utterly Butterly commercial! I’d seen Peter in a sitcom; it wasn’t a very good one, but I remember thinking he was quite Mandelson-esque.

Iannucci We hadn’t written Malcolm as Scottish, we’d just written someone trying to keep his aggression in and then when he’s prodded too many times it bursts out. I actually had Peter down as a very gentle kind of soul, as he is in real life. But, as he tells it, he turned up in a bad mood that day.

Capaldi I met Armando and Adam in a little studio in Soho. I was pissed off when I went in. It was not a good period for me. I’d gone to an audition at Television Centre that morning for a little part and I knew everybody in the room. I thought, why am I going on tape with all of you people that I’ve worked with before?

Tandy When Peter came in, I think he was on the verge of giving up acting. We were running slightly behind schedule and Sarah Crowe, our casting director, actually had to pop out of the casting session to try to persuade him to stay.

Sarah Crowe: Peter kept saying “I’m terrible at improvisation. I’m going to embarrass you, I’m going to embarrass myself. I had to really cajole him to come in. But he wasn’t alone in being reluctant. I remember someone actually walked out, saying “call me back in when you bother to write a script.”

Iannucci I said to Peter I will be a cabinet minister and your job is to persuade me to go … and then at some point just stop being nice. He did it and it was frightening. I thought: “There’s Malcolm Tucker”.

Capaldi I remember very clearly the moment where I “got it”. The minister said: “Well, can I come back?” and I said, “It’s not fucking Coronation Street, you can’t come back!” I thought: Oh, that’s what it is.

Iannucci Peter channelled Harvey Weinstein and lots of quite lippy LA agents. It wasn’t meant to be Alastair Campbell. It was more about this group I’d heard about called “the enforcers”. They would fan out from No 10 and go around the ministers saying: “This is the line, this is what you can say, this is not what you can’t say.”

Joanna Scanlan, played director of communications Terri CoverleyAs I understand it, Armando invented the character of Terri after our audition. He hadn’t thought of her before so I must have talked myself into an entirely new character. Most of what I created as Terri was from when I worked at the Arts Council England. There were people there who’d move from job to job within the arts without ever understanding what it was they were trying to create.

Iannucci I saw Chris Langham do a docudrama about George Orwell and it was such a nuanced, humane, believable performance – but with this slightly hangdog feel to it. I thought he would be perfect to play the minister [Hugh Abbot].

Martin Armando sent me the first three scripts for The Thick of It and said: “Look, just sprinkle your shit everywhere.” I didn’t know what to do. The writers were Jesse Armstrong, Simon Blackwell and Tony Roche – massive, massive figures in the world of comedy. I just stared at the script for about half an hour thinking: “You can’t improve [Peep Show and future Succession creator] Jesse Armstrong!” Especially not if you’re some flailing wanker. The breakthrough was when I changed a line of Malcolm’s from “Don’t bother he’s fucking useless” to “He’s about as much use as a marzipan dildo”. I said: “Is that the sort of thing you’re after?” And Armando said: “Yes, very much so.”

Communication breakdown … James Smith, Joanna Scanlan and Chris Addison in series two of The Thick of It. Photograph: Everett Collection/Alamy

Scanlan I always got very frustrated because Terri had to have a blow-dry in the morning. And I’d be watching all these blokes [male members of the cast] descending on Armando as soon as he walked on the floor, like petitioning for their lines or ideas to go into something. I’d want to do the same but be there thinking: “I’m stuck in this fucking chair!” I felt really irritated by that.

Cairney On the first day of filming, Armando came over and said: “Move the camera more, make it more messy.” I thought I was being messy! So some of the messiness was deliberately overdoing it. It took us a few days to get there. Ben Wheeler, a brilliant DOP who was operating the other camera, turned to me and said: “Well, we’re never going to work again after this.”

Tandy I could only afford to give three and a half days to each episode. That’s not a long time to shoot half an hour. And so everything was shot in the old Guinness factory off the A40 in west London.

Scanlan The building was derelict. There was no funding. It felt guerrilla, like Armando was trying to get away with something the BBC wouldn’t necessarily have sanctioned.

Iannucci I wanted to try to lose all those traditional grammars of filming. So it was like a news crew turning up at a cabinet meeting. They’re not going to let you film it all again – it’s up to you to find the footage.

Capaldi Filming is a very traditional process – you do a master shot and then the closeups. Armando threw all that out of the window. He said: “You come on to the set, it’s lit, you can go wherever you like, we don’t rehearse, off you go!” The cameras had to follow us. They didn’t have any preparation. They wouldn’t know where anyone was going. A scene would tend to go on for ages. When they said cut, you’d be exhausted. But it was a fabulous experience. I think all of us who worked on the show never looked back from that because that way of working was so radical.

Iannucci We filmed it on the fly: handheld cameras, radio mics, no leads attached. I said to the cast: even if you leave the room we’re still recording you, we can hear what you’re saying, so you’re never off. There was nowhere to hide.

Tandy For the first series I’d heard about a device that they’d been using in the States, this five-channel sound recording device. It meant we could mic up all of the actors and record all of the conversations happening in an office at the same time. That device was probably the thing that made The Thick of It possible.

Cairney Armando would edit the sound first – the words were the most important thing for him. Then the editors would throw some pictures in and see what stuck with the audio. If you go through the episodes with a magnifying glass there’s some extremely bad continuity there. Hair will change, coffee cups will suddenly be refilled, but Armando didn’t give a shit about any of that. And nobody noticed which proved that it didn’t actually matter!

Capaldi Armando was great at finding these moments in the character’s eyes and faces that conveyed the chaos and the stress and delight of what they were going through.

Scanlan Before getting the role I had a Saturday job at an estate agency in Dulwich. My boss there told me one day that if I wanted to earn a bit of extra cash I could join these focus groups. She said: “You’re an actress, just say you are who they’re looking for! Say you’re a married housewife with three kids at Dulwich College or something.” So I went and did it and got my 50 quid. I mentioned the focus group to Armando. He was laughing and ended up turning the story into the second episode.

Martin There was this synchronous thing going on where we would float a policy and then literally the next week one or other of the parties would announce the same thing. I think how it happened was that the spads and the writers of The Thick of It were trying to work out the exact same problem: the money’s run out so what can we say that won’t cost anything but will sound good and keep us in the headlines?

Iannucci In the first series there’s that scene in the back of a car where they’re trying to come up with policies on the way to make an announcement. We were actually in the back of the car going to the next location so I said: “Why don’t we just film you trying to come up with new policies?” Three of them which made it into the final cut actually became law within a couple of years! James Smith [who played Glenn Cullen] came up with “Why doesn’t everyone have to have a plastic bag of their own?” There was pet asbos, which I think happened quite soon after. And Chris Addison [who played Olly Reader] came up with the national spare room database, which became the bedroom tax. I remember James Purnell, who was culture secretary at the time, saying to me: “I’ve been in the back of that car”.

Tandy After the first two seasons, which were only three episodes each, Armando came to me with a plan to do an extended run. We got a commission to do 10 more episodes. And then it started to go wrong.

Going down? … Chris Addison, James Smith, Joanna Scanlan, Rebecca Front and Peter Capaldi. Photograph: Everett Collection Inc/Alamy

In November 2005, Chris Langham was arrested in connection with paying to access indecent and abusive images of children on the internet. Six months later he was charged with 15 counts of downloading indecent images of children.

Iannucci It was difficult with Chris because he was charged but there wasn’t a trial. I decided to not make a judgment until there was a judgment. I didn’t realise the trial would take over 18 months. That’s why we did two one-hour specials where Hugh was referred to but wasn’t in it. But then he was found guilty so it became very clear.

Tandy When Chris was found guilty we had to recast. That’s when Rebecca joined us.

Rebecca Front, played social affairs secretary Nicola Murray The first time I watched The Thick of It, I thought: “Blimey, this is good.” I didn’t know they were casting or even making another series. I had a conversation with Armando and he said they were going to do another and halfway through it I thought: “Hang on, is he offering me something?”

Iannucci Nicola was the thing Malcolm hated the most, which was a minister who actually believed in something. Most of that third season was her ambitions being gradually whittled away.

Front They didn’t know that much about my character at the beginning, just that they liked the idea of it being a woman and a backbencher who had been promoted beyond anyone’s expectations. And so one of the inspirations for Nicola Murray was very much me! Armando asked if I was politically minded and I told him that I had formed our sixth-form debating society. I actually did think of going into politics because I had really strong opinions about certain things like nuclear disarmament. Nicola is basically me if I’d had my life ruined by politics.

Iannucci The show is a window into bullying culture. In several episodes Malcolm explicitly states that he is a bully. He pulls people apart. You wouldn’t be allowed to operate like that today. I’m sure it’s still highly charged and people shout at each other but I don’t think that single-minded, laser-like destruction of people’s personalities would be tolerated.

Front I’d never met Peter before. I knew him mainly as Malcolm Tucker. My first impression was of this charming, gentle man. I thought: “Oh, he’s absolutely gorgeous.” And then we did a little bit of improv and he immediately turned into Malcolm. It was terrifying. A total physical change.

Capaldi Did I feel like I was scaring people? No, they all scared me! They’d all been to Oxford and had been on telly for years. I was just a guy from bands in Glasgow who ate curries and drank lager.

Front It’s weirdly easy to distance yourself from the script. You think: “They’re not saying that about me, they’re talking about Nicola.” However, I do remember improvising in a rehearsal room and Peter saying: “What are those fucking boots, you’re not a fucking cowgirl!” and me thinking, “Those are my actual boots, I only bought them last week!”

Iannucci Did we ever overstep the line? Actors came into it knowing that they were going to be in line for lots of visual takedowns. But we would check in case they thought: “No I don’t want someone saying that about me on national television.” Chris [Addison] was described as looking like a Quentin Blake cartoon … but I think he rather liked that one.

Front It was easy to act terrified and cowed but nobody wants to see a woman being terrified by a bully. So I thought let’s see what happens if I stand up to Malcolm, and I think immediately it started to be funnier because it was no longer just Peter shouting at somebody. You want at least one Tuckering per episode, but that can’t be the whole relationship. So Nicola ends up constantly doing things that she knows will piss him off.

Capaldi All Malcolm’s doing is his job, you know? The idea that he’s monstrous … he’s horrible to people, but he’s moving the government’s agenda forward.

Mad for it … Peter Capaldi and Chris Addison in series two of The Thick of It. Photograph: Everett Collection/Alamy

Front I hope people can sympathise with Nicola because she really gets trampled by it. She goes in with all guns blazing, but really by the end of her first episode she’s already been chewed up and spat out.

Iannucci A lot of junior spads see Malcolm as an ideal to aim for. But if you analyse any episode it’s always: something small happens that’s bad, then Malcolm comes in, makes it worse, and then leaves blaming everyone else. So how is he good in any way? It’s like when Dominic Cummings came in. People said he’s an amazing communicator and an amazing strategist … but the Covid crisis had no strategy and terrible communication.

Martin Some of the lines you wouldn’t do now. They’re a tiny bit misogynistic and tiny bit homophobic. I was always a bit uncomfortable with that stuff.

Iannucci It’s a stupid, macho, testosterone-fuelled environment, slightly thuggish. But it’s all verbal. These people wouldn’t last 10 seconds in an actual fight. They probably don’t even go to the gym because they haven’t got time. They just drink lots of coffee from 5am and shout … it’s a stupid and frankly inefficient way of working. And then when they all leave politics they all talk about mental health and do lots of charity work in big thick jumpers!

Scanlan At the beginning, before Rebecca came in, I was the only woman. I wouldn’t say I was frightened, but they were all a foot taller than me. I was on my own with these tall men and thinking: “How do I get heard in this world?” It did get quite aggressive and braying with that masculine energy. One day it went too far. People were throwing insults around that you just wouldn’t do in an office. Armando stopped the improvisation and said: “That’s not truthful.” He was brilliant like that.

Front One of Armando’s great gifts is that he can push things a very long way and yet stay just the right side of it. It comes, I think, from him having a very strong moral compass. The joke always comes from the right direction.

Martin I’ve always felt a bit sorry for Terri. I even remember apologising to Jo at one point. She was the butt of so many jokes. She was roundly criticised by everybody right from the very first episode until the very last one she appeared in. It was always “she’s fucking useless, I hate her” and everything. And yet she was no more incompetent than the people complaining about her.

Tandy I’d seen some Ofcom research that said that people were less bothered by swearing now than they had been. So I thought, well, it’s a digital channel, we’ll probably get away with it. We actually got very few complaints about language. So I’m glad I held my nerve.

Capaldi I think because I’m from Glasgow the swearing came very naturally. Sometimes a “fucking” in the middle of a sentence can propel it forward with a new energy. But often I would swear because I couldn’t remember my lines. It would take a fucking minute or two for me to fucking remember the line that I fucking forgot. So I would be searching desperately for the line … and then it would fucking arrive!

Martin I think the BBC quite liked the mythology of me being hired as a “swearing consultant”. The idea that they’d solemnly brought in this kind of craftsman of the swear. It did rankle with everybody else a little bit because they all did excellent swears, too.

Tandy There was one occasion where there was a particular swear that was judged to be offensive and we were asked to make an edit quite late in the day. I think it might have been the word “gash”, which was replaced with the word “cave”. That’s sort of worse, isn’t it?

Martin Great swearing is all about getting the balance right. It’s no different to writing poetry, a novel or a stupid haiku. All the lines I loved were by other people. I loved “Tinker Tailor Soldier cunt” – that was a Simon Blackwell line.

Tandy Sometimes it was awful. There was one episode where we had I think well over 100 uses of just the F word. That’s not including the other swearwords. But then they said: “Do you think you could take what you do with The Thick of It and turn it into a feature film?” We thought about it for about, I don’t know, 15 seconds. And then In the Loop came together within the next 18 months, which is very quickly for a feature film.

Iannucci In the Loop made sense because The Thick of It arose after the invasion of Iraq, where everyone across the board at the time was saying: “This will be an almighty mistake,” and yet it went ahead anyway. I was intrigued as to why it is that someone can do that and get away with it and not be stopped, even though we’re in a democracy with an opposition and a kind of shared responsibility. So what’s happened that has meant No 10 can drive through anything it wants?

Scanlan I loved our trip down to Eastbourne for the party conference in series three. That was my most enjoyable day. Which is ridiculous because I’m basically just saying I like going on holiday, which is very much what Terri would say.

Front My favourite moment? I liked it when Nicola has a breakdown during the party conference. It was fun to film, actually. We established that, like me, she is prone to panic attacks … so it felt entirely honest that she would jump up and down on the cushions like that. I thought: “I know if I do this it will make Armando laugh.”

Tandy I remember when we did the inquiry episode, Armando and I basically arranged it so that only the people on the panel had the full script. They didn’t even get to meet the cast regulars, who were appearing as witnesses, beforehand.

Capaldi I love the idea of playing husks. Malcolm loved his job, he was addicted to it. But I think when it’s all over and he’s in the back of the car after leaving the police station, he’s relieved that the shit is over. His last words to the press are “It doesn’t matter” … because it doesn’t matter! The world continues stumbling to oblivion irrespective of what he thinks.

Cairney That whole final scene was emotional to shoot. We got a closeup on Peter’s face and drove around for about 15 minutes thinking this would be an amazing shot to run really long. And in true Thick of It style, Armando cut it after about five seconds: “Malcolm Tucker’s done. Let’s move on.”

State of play … Pearce Quigley and Peter Capaldi in series three of The Thick of It. Photograph: Everett Collection/Alamy

Tandy To begin with, politicians were quite cagey about the show. Whenever you met them they would say: “Oh I don’t watch that thing,” but they absolutely did – they were able to quote you huge chunks of it!

Iannucci Ed Miliband used the word “omnishambles” and David Cameron said the opposition were like “an episode of The Thick of It”. I thought: if politicians are now embracing this then it’s time for something else to start challenging them back.

Tandy I think it did have an effect on the Westminster bubble. I don’t know if it was a very good one, though, because I think it sort of normalised slightly loutish behaviour.

Iannucci Did it change anything? I don’t know. If it awoke people into thinking: “How can we change things?” then that would be a good thing. But 20 years on, it hasn’t exactly led to a better politics, has it?

Scanlan It was the last gasp of a time when there was still some respect for politicians. Arguably The Thick of It played a role in the de-escalation of respect for politicians.

Crowe It was a defining career moment for some people and a reinvention for others.

Capaldi After The Thick of It I realised that my voice had become more sinister. It got a bit lower, a bit stranger.

Martin I’d had a miserable 90s, chugging along doing bits and bobs as a musician and journalist. The Thick of It absolutely saved me. It couldn’t work now. There’s no shame any more, is there? I mean, in the early episodes you had characters saying: “For God’s sake, please don’t tell me you’ve lied to a committee!” The idea that someone’s career could be at stake over a lie they told to parliament has no traction now. People do it all the time. Blatantly.

Iannucci Has it stood the test of time? I’ve never gone back and watched it. I’ve had people message over the years saying we should make a Brexit one or a coronavirus one … but we never did things around specific incidents. We set it in a parallel world where some of these things sort of happened but were bound up with things that were completely made up, so that it wouldn’t date.

Peter Capaldi: People often ask if Malcolm’s going to move into podcasting. It might be good for him to do a kind of country podcast, actually, where he wanders around the countryside, meeting people he can’t fucking stand, like farmers.

Scanlan It’s a show that really appeals to 15- and 16-year-olds. They’ll say: “Are you Terri from The Thick of It?” So it’s given me a strange lifeline into youth culture.

Capaldi Three people came up to me yesterday in Soho to say it was their favourite programme. I met Brian Cox [Logan Roy in Succession] the other day and he told me with great delight that people come up to him and ask him to tell them to fuck off. I didn’t like to tell him that I’ve been doing that for 20 years now.

#the guardian #2025 #the thick of it #malcolm tucker #armando iannucci #rebecca front #adam tandy #ian martin #joanna scanlan #jamie cairney #interview #article #peter capaldi

16 notes · View notes

bluereo · 8 months ago

Text

Pt.1 link above

Superbat with some Batfam hurt/comfort - fic idea

It gets worse before it gets better. I'm sorry.

There will be part 3

Pt.2

It took them longer then it should to realise they fucked up.

Maybe it was one too many close calls, one too many bruises or broken bones. But they finally saw it. This silent pain buried deep in the heart of one they called Father.

Truth was, Bruce wasn't getting any younger. Of course, he still had some years before the idea of retirement even started to look appealing, but he was not getting any younger.

Pretty much all kids grown up by now, Damian was the only one full-time kid at the manor. Each of them had their own lives to live, their partners, hell, even kids.

Manor started to feel painfully empty, loneliness Bruce hadn't felt in years started to come back. Just like so many years ago when his parents died. Empty corridors and empty rooms that looked lived in but no one wrapped in those blankets at night, no one stole snacks from kitchen just after midnight and no one to talk to during breakfast on a week day.

Of course, they saw each other and talked, but it wasn't the same anymore. Patrols were patrols, and missions were missions. Nothing compared to movie nights and cuddle piles when someone was sick.

It's no surprise that Bruce turned away from Clark when his time with kids was already heavily limited and started to decline further.

He cherished each dinner they had at weekends, and he couldn't let this go. What was one more sacrifice in sea of his past mistakes and sacrifices to keep his family in one piece?

But kids saw it finally. How harmless joke, soft teasing turned to poison that was injected directly in Bruce's heart. He needed someone by his side. He spent too many years surviving and carrying burdens of the city and world on his shoulders. He deserved someone he could count on. Not like parent and child but like partners.

And who was better for that than Superman himself?

Soon, kids started planning.

Dick, being a member of JL, saw personally that despite months from breakup, Clark and Bruce were just as gone for eachother like half year earlier. He tried to talk with Clark, but man just refused to even start this topic with Bruce. "I respect his decision. He already hurts from this, and until he says so, we are, and will be, just friends."

Jason tried a more direct approach. Not straight up talking about this like an adult should, Wayne's were after all the most stubborn and emotionally dysfunctional people on the planed after all, but tried to talk nonetheless. "You could stop being this grumpy old prick and find some hobby that doesn't include brooding and running around punching people in the faces. Find someone to talk with for fucks sake." No suprise it didn't really work. Talking to someone was taken as a message to increase the amount of his therapy meeting. (And here Bruce thought he was doing good in eyes of his kids...)

Tim turned to his advanced technological and planning skills. The number of setups he prepared where Bruce and Clark ended in one room without chance to leave for hours was worse than all romantic comedies created. Not to mention changing their schedules so they spend more time together in watchtower. Tim unfortunately got nothing from it besides massive headache, few sleepless nights, and second-hand embarrassment in concerning amounts.

Girls decided to team up in their attempt to mend broken hearts. They tried every single piece of advice they found in media and books. Sweets send from kne to another, flowers with secret meaning, they even tried to create some kind of love potion though website clearly knew nothing about magic. After the third attempt to add some rose petals to ink chanting questionable things in Latin, they settled for being Tim's support in imprisoning lovebirds together.

Only when Damian was half way in to threatening Clark with a knife made of kryptonite Bruce had enough.

______________

Working slowly on part 3.

Correct me if there are any mistakes. I don't have beta reader and I'm tired as hell.

Also, sorry if the girls' part turned out to be a bit forced. I had no idea what to do with them since they seem to be somehow the most sane ones.

#dcu #dc universe #bruce wayne x clark kent #bruce wayne is a good dad #bruce wayne #clark kent #batfam #batman #bat family

27 notes · View notes

tinkerbelle05 · 2 years ago

Note

Hello! I’ve read some of your works and I absolutely adored them! Can I request for an Usopp x f!reader angst? Maybe something like (reader’s) one sided love? Or reader being Usopp’s childhood friend that’s secretly in love with him even though she knew he likes Kaya?Thank you!🫶🏻

I Know It’s Not Me. It Was Never Me

Characters: Usopp x Fem!reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: (Requested) Thanks sweets 🍭

Warnings: unrequited love, one sided love, pinning, bitterness, no happy ending (sorry) (no I’m not lol)

You knew that you weren’t the one that had Ussop’s heart. That his heart belonged to Kaya. It was obvious from the way his eyes gleamed whenever he talked about her.

How he always talked about her. No matter the topic, he always, always found a way to relate it back to Kaya.

He could look at the sky and said it reminded him of Kaya, he could look at delicious sweets and say that he wished he could give some to Kaya, hell he could be talking about his “adventures” and said he wished he could bring Kaya with him.

His eyes would bright up at the mere sight of her, he would spend every waking hour with her if he could.

It was just Kaya, Kaya, and even more Kaya. It was annoying to hear about it.

And it hurt so, so much. You were right there, you were attainable to Usopp but still he dreamt of having Kaya. Even though he knew that it would never work. That they could never work.

Guess people would always want something they couldn’t have. Guess that saying rang true for you too.

At a certain part, your sadness melted into bitterness which turned into hatred. You weren’t proud of it and you knew that it was no one’s fault. You couldn’t help who you loved and neither could Usopp.

That didn’t stop your blood from boiling when you saw Kaya though.

It didn’t stop your eyes from rolling whenever Usopp went on and on about Kaya either. And it didn’t stop you from crying your eyes out every night under your covers where wished and prayed that one day your feelings would just disappear.

Every night you wished your heart wouldn’t skip a beat when Usopp’s brown eyes landed on you and you wished your mind would stop wondering what Usopp was doing absentmindedly.

You hugged your pillow tighter and pressed your face deeper into it, hoping it’d muffle your cries so you wouldn’t wake your family up.

The day was mundane as every, you helped your family with the shop throughout the day and cleaned it up at closing. It was almost evening, the sky became a multitude of oranges and purples. There was no sight of Usopp though.

You didn't know if you were happy or not because of it. To distract yourself from your complicated feelings, you busied yourself with work.

Besides, like your Dad loved to say there's always work to be done. You're just not looking hard enough.

“Hey, where's that boy you hang around at?” Your mom asked as she restocked the bread for tomorrow.

You wiped the tables, “I don’t know.”

With how quiet and dejected you sound, your mother gave you a worried look. You didn’t respond to it and she didn’t push it.

You went outside to take a break and felt the cool breeze on your face when you saw it. Ussop embraced and kissed Kaya.

You stopped dead in your tracks.

You didn’t think… Well you…

But it was right there, in front of your very eyes. You looked away from the scene, feeling embarrassed, creepy, angry, sad. Too many conflicting emotions, your chest started to hurt and your tears started to flow.

You slid down on the wall of your family’s shop. It was an alleyway so no one would bother you but an stray animal or something.

You knew you weren’t the one Ussop would choose. But you didn’t think that they could happen. That rather scary butler of Kaya’s clearly hated Ussop, and so you thought…

No, it didn’t matter now. He chosen. And it wasn’t you, it’d never, in an million years, be you.

You heard the bell ringing from your shop’s door, someone had walked in but it was closing time. Your mother probably would’ve turned them away.

“Oh, hello Ussop,” she said and your hears perked up.

“Hello, ma’am, um do you know where (Y/N) is? I have something to tell her,” you heard him ask.

What could he possibly want with you? Oh, god. Did he knew that you liked him? This whole time? Is he going to try to tell you?

You prided on being stealthy with your feelings but you get caught up in your head at times so maybe you weren’t as secretive as you thought.

God, how humiliating is that?

“I'm sorry, dear. But I don't. Would you like me to relay a message back to her?” your mother asked.

You could hear the reluctance in his voice, “I…I don't know. Because, well I'm leaving the island, And I don't know when or if I'll come back. So I want to say goodbye in person.”

That shocked you. He was leaving? To go where? With who? With Kaya maybe? Were they gonna runaway with each other?

You stood up on your tippy toes, looking at them both through a small window. You could see your mother but Usopp’s back was to you.

“Oh, that's wow. Hm, I guessed you've outgrown this place. It was bound to happen soon or later, huh?” your mother responded, and she caught your eye.

You quickly shook your head, please don't tell him. You knew that maybe one day you'd regret this but you weren't strong enough for this. To see him, leaving.

Usopp chuckled, “Yea, guess so. But you really don't know where she is?”

Your mother shook her head and he sighed deeply. They said their goodbyes, and your mother offered Usopp some food for his travels.

Then he was gone. You heard his voice, talking to his new friends. It was growing quiet and soon you couldn’t hear him anymore.

Maybe this distance between the two of you would make your heart grow numb to him. In any case, you just hoped it wouldn’t grow fonder.

Tags: @puff-hugs, @dragonqueenfk, @foxflamewarrior, @childofhecate108, @alienstardust, @louissolovely, @randomhoex, @abree234, @localcowboyd, @msmisasoup, @thatgothic-nerd, @charliepoopyfart, @0picels0, @rotin0, @nikolaevna-art, @cielitoot7, @tayharrper, @simpingmyassoff, @borkbarnes, @villainouspotential, @ramielll, @dimplewonie, @olliewhinchester, @dearest-lady, @heydemonsitsyaboilucien, @poketrainer2270, @ghostysfanfics, @penny44224, @707xn, @yoongi-holland, @don-tuna, @louissolovely, @n1ght5h4d3-24, @fuck-you-im-gae, @smolracoon25, @synchronised-beat, @flowerslds-blog, @secretlittlestudyblog

Taglist & Masterlist & Reqs Info

#usopp x kaya #usopp x reader #usopp x you #usopp x y/n #one piece usopp #op usopp #opla usopp #ussop fanfic #ussop imagine #one piece x reader #one piece live action x reader #opla x y/n #opla x reader #one piece fanfiction #one piece imagine

178 notes · View notes

zebulontheplanet · 1 year ago

Text

My verbal speech had been a complicated thing lately. I’ve been using AAC more and more. Especially on my phone. I talk maybe 10% of the time? It’s just getting less and less, and I speak in shorter and shorter sentences. It isn’t a bad thing, I’ve come to accept it.

My catatonia makes it so I have frequent and constant verbal shutdowns. Some that last for minutes, and some that last for hours at a time. Sometimes, It’ll be so long that I’ll start to fear that my speech is gone all together, but it eventually comes back and I have to remind myself to stop freaking myself out.

I think of semiverbalism as a large spectrum of people, but still people who are more on the higher verbal scale, and then people on the lower verbal scale. I’m somewhere in the middle of that. I don’t speak nearly enough as I could, but I’m still not not speaking if that makes sense.

It’s scary in a way. Your speech slowly getting worse is scary in a way. It isn’t something that I feel like people talk about, because they don’t want to say the wrong thing and immediately have people assume that they mean being lower verbal or even nonverbal is bad. I don’t think they’re bad, but I think the process of going through it is personally scary.

It isn’t bad to say something is scary. And it isn’t bad to wish that something like losing or declining in your speech wouldn’t happen to you because of the struggles you’d face.

Being semiverbal like I am is a whole journey in of itself. I think personally, as someone who is on the lower verbal side of being semiverbal, that semiverbalism although should be a huge spectrum of people, people automatically assume I can speak more than I can. I’ve been looking for better terms for myself. I’m not minimally verbal because I can speak more than 20,30,50 words.(very debated topic) but I can’t find a better term than semiverbal.

This is just all a complicated thing, and for awhile I thought that maybe my speech was getting better, before I had a rapid decline in speech recently. It’s a process, and something I never thought I’d experience.

That’s all.

#zebrambles #autism #actually autism #actually autistic #semiverbal #semi verbal #semiverbalism #speech #long post

66 notes · View notes

gender-fluidbees · 1 year ago

Text

who wants to read the first chapter of my byler fake dating wip to decide if I should keep writing it?

The Byers-Hopper living room had been temporarily turned into a large cave of sleeping bags and blankets. They had managed to get away with the excuse of Max and El coincidentally having a sleepover at the same time the boys did. Not at all a mixed event. Dustin had been trying to throw popcorn into Max’s mouth while Lucas bugged Will with the same question he had been asking since he came out to them.

“When are you gonna get a boyfriend?” Lucas whined.

Will rolled his eyes and set his soda down on the floor next to him.

“As soon as I find a gay boy in Hawkins that is out and wants to date me,” he said with a dry tone that implied the odds of that were very slim, at which Dustin scoffed as if personally offended without looking away from his mission.

“Will, if I liked boys, I would be all over you,” he insisted.

They all laughed as Will pulled a disgusted face, though he appreciated the gesture.

“Thanks, man, but I’m good.”

“You must like someone,” said Lucas with a raised eyebrow.

Will’s eyes darted to Mike, lightning quick so no one would catch it, but he met his gaze before looking away and clearing his throat.

“Leave him alone, guys,” Mike said, annoyed. Max’s eyebrows appeared to launch off her forehead but she said nothing. Of course Mike would be the one to help him, to protect him. He always was, wasn’t he?

There was a moment of silence before El stood up and stretched.

“I am getting more pizza,” she announced and Dustin went to join her.

They managed to make it another two hours before the topic came up again. This time, surprisingly, it was El who said something. Everyone else was getting ready for bed and she sat next to him on the floor.

“Do you not like anyone?” she asked earnestly. Will sighed.

“It’s complicated.”

She paused before saying, “I hope it stops being complicated. I hope you get him.”

Will smiled and hugged his sister as everyone walked back into the room.

“What are we talking about?” asked Dustin.

“Boys,” El told him.

“Yes! Get my boy some di-“

“MAX!” Will interrupted before she could finish her sentence. His face flushed a dark red and he shook his head in disbelief. This feeling only increased when he saw Mike trying to cover up a laugh with a cough.

“Something funny, Michael?” he asked.

“Nope,” he said, finally laughing out loud.

That laugh. Will had heard it all his life and yet he never tired of it. The way his nose scrunched and his cheeks dusted with pink. It was Will’s favorite way to draw him.

They had all settled in to watch a movie, and the subject was not brought up, but Will’s mind wouldn’t let the topic go.

When would he get a boyfriend, if ever? Why was he stuck on Mike after all these years? Why couldn’t he just move on?

“Hey,” Mike said in his ear from beside him on the floor, “You ok?”

Will swallowed. “Yeah, I’m good.”

Mike’s breath had been hot on his cheek and they were pressed up so close against the couch. Will wiped his sweaty hands and excused himself to go to the bathroom. He just needed a moment to breathe.

When he reached the bathroom and closed the door, he finally felt his limbs relax. It had only been about a minute and a half before there was a knock at the bathroom door.

“Yeah?” Will called.

“Will, it’s Mike, I just came to check on you.”

He opened the door to let Mike in and closed it once more. The two boys sat on the cold tile, knees touching ever so slightly.

“What’s going on?” he asked softly and Will sighed deeply.

“It’s stupid, I’m just a bit tired of all the relationship questions.”

Mike nodded sagely and his brows furrowed. Will knew that face. It was the same face Mike made when he had an idea for a campaign. That was a dangerous face.

“Miiiike. What are you planning?” he pouted, shoving the boy.

“Shh, let me think,” he said, putting his finger to Will’s lips for a second. He went cross eyed to look at the hand on his mouth and his heart picked up about ten paces. Mike removed his hand and stood up, beginning to pace the small bathroom and Will stood soon after in confusion.

“Okay, so the party won’t stop bothering you about dating someone, yes?”

“Yes?” Will said slowly.

“And your family is worried you're lonely, yes?”

“Hey! I-”

“Shut up and let me finish. I want to move out of my dad’s house but he won’t let me…” Mike trailed off as if Will could finish the thought for him.

“Mike, literally what do those things have to do with each other?”

He looked at Will like it was obvious and held his hands out in a general ‘duh’ gesture.

“You date me!”

Will caught a glimpse of the face he made in the bathroom mirror, and no words could describe what that emotion was. Will calls it, ‘my-best-friend-who-is-a-boy-and-very-straight-who-I-am-in-love-with-says-I-should-date-him.’

It took a moment for Will to get the word out of his mouth, as it had gotten very dry. “What?”

“You date me! Pretend, of course-”

“Of course.”

“-so everyone leaves you alone and my dad kicks me out because he’s a piece of shit. Everybody wins!”

After a moment, he deduced that Mike was not joking, and the panic receptors in his brain which never did their job correctly made him laugh. Loudly.

“What are you smoking, Mike?”

“What?” Mike asked, offended. He seemed to think it was a great plan. Will caught his breath and leaned against the wall.

“Mike, no one’s gonna buy that. Also, it is not worth losing your family over a joke. What if he- what if he hurt you?”

As Will tried to get Mike to see reason, some part of him wanted to say yes. Some awful, selfish, thirteen year old part of him wanted Mike in whatever way he could get him even if it was fake.

Mike seemed to think Will’s words over, and he had a moment of hope that the boy would change his mind.

“You think he would hurt me?” Mike asked, as if this had never occurred to him.

“Mike, I’m not saying your dad’s a bad person, but-”

“He’s the scum of the earth, but continue.”

“People do crazy things when they think someone they love might be g- might be like me.”

Mike’s face twisted in a way that churned Will’s stomach. No, don’t be sad, don’t look like a kicked puppy.

“Well then we gotta do it.”

“What?!?” Will exclaimed, more confused than ever. He thought he had changed his mind, not egged him on.

“Think about it. If Hawkins has a publicly gay couple, it could make it easier for other people.”

“You want it to be public?” Will screeched. Okay, Mike had officially lost his mind, because if he thought the bullying was bad already, just wait until he announced he was a boykisser.

Mike grinned. “Are you agreeing?”

“No! I’m the opposite of agreeing! I’m disagreeing! I am the antithesis to whatever point it is that you’re trying to make!”

Mike just laughed. “The point is it’s a win-win situation. We say we’re dating, we hold hands in front of people, maybe kiss a few times then we stage a break up. No harm done.”

Kiss. He wanted them to kiss. Well, no, not wanted, but he suggested it. Oh god.

“You do realize if your father kicks you out, you might never speak to him again.”

“If that’s the worst case scenario, then this plan is better than I thought.”

Will sighed again, running his hands over his face. He only had so much willpower. The boy he had been in love with for years was offering a free trial on a silver platter and wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“How would it work?” he asked quietly, trying not to read into the way Mike’s face lit up when he said it.

“We would walk downstairs now holding hands and tell the party we’re dating. Then tomorrow we tell your family. Word gets around, my dad explodes, I move in with Nancy.”

“That’s it? That’s your genius plan? We need to figure out every step. How long have we been dating? Who asked who? When did you realize you were gay? Are you even gay or are you bisexual? Do we…”

Will trailed off and grinded his teeth. Mike cocked his head.

“Do we what?”

“...kiss?”

Mike paused a second before laughing at Will’s hushed tone.

“I would hope so, if we were dating.”

Will rolled his eyes and grabbed Mike by the shoulders to make him look at him, ignoring the way his heart fluttered at the contact. He needed to get this point across.

“Mike. If we were fake dating. If we kissed. Then that means that you would have to kiss me. On the lips. Me and you,” he said clearly, sure that this would be the deal breaker to snap him out of it. Instead, Mike just looked at him with the same serious face, pushing Will’s hands off his shoulders.

“Will. I know. That’s how kissing works,” he said with a shit eating grin.

“And you’re okay with that?”

This was Will’s lifelong dream and worst nightmare all wrapped into one.

“Yeah, I mean, it would be weird if it was like Lucas or something but it’s you.”

He said it so plainly, so surely that Will knew he meant it. And that hurt so wonderfully. His head was spinning. No, he did not want to kiss him, but he would rather kiss him than another boy. He offered.

“Have you ever kissed anyone?” Mike asked, making Will roll his eyes.

“Mike, when would I have ever had the chance to kiss someone?”

Mike just shrugged and leaned back against the sink. “Wanna practice? Y’know, before we kiss in front of someone else.”

Will blanched. “I- I still haven’t agreed, technically.”

His heart seemed to be trying to escape his ribcage and he willed it to calm down. This was not happening. Mike smiled at him, that wonderful smile, and knelt down on one knee, holding out cupped hands in front of him.

“William Byers, will you do me the honor of fake dating me?”

There was a pause, and then, “Ugh, fine. Get off the floor, it’s dirty.”

Mike stood and brushed off his pants with a haughty sort of pride at having convinced him. The boys looked at each other for a moment, saying nothing.

“So, uh, what now?” Will asked, fidgeting.

“You never answered my other question.” Mike said, stepping closer. Will’s heart pounded.

“What other question?”

Mike took another step so he was almost pressed against Will, but not quite.

“Wanna practice?”

Oh god. What was he supposed to say? Which answer was less suspicious? If he said yes, he would seem too eager, but if he said no, it would look like he was hiding something.

Mike studied his face and took a quick step back, looking guilty. “Hey, we don’t have to kiss at all if you’re not comfortable with that. Maybe we’re not a PDA couple.”

Will groaned internally. Had he just missed his one chance to kiss Mike Wheeler? It’s not like that offer was going to present itself again.

“No,” he said too quickly, “I mean, no it doesn’t make me uncomfortable. We can… kiss.”

Mike raised an eyebrow and stepped back into Will’s personal space.

“You sure?”

“M’sure,” he breathed.

Mike slowly reached out to grab his chin and Will tried not to squirm. His hands were big enough to cradle his whole face if he wanted to. He felt himself being tugged forward slightly and Mike Wheeler was kissing him. It was… disappointing. Will forgot to close his eyes or do anything with his lips and his hands were just hanging at his sides uselessly. Mike pulled away slightly. Well, that was it. His first kiss. Wahoo.

“You gonna kiss me back or what?” he asked with a smirk, his voice slightly scratchy, setting every nerve ending in his body on fire.

Their lips touched again, and this time he responded. He closed his eyes and kissed him back. Their lips slotted awkwardly at first, but Will tilted his head to the right and there it was. This was the kiss that he had wanted. It was soft and his heart was in his throat as he was trying so hard to not fuck it up. Mike pressed closer to him, putting a hand on the wall beside him. His lips opened slightly, prying Will’s open as he skated his tongue across his bottom lip. Will inhaled sharply through his nose and pulled away so he could breathe. His lips tingled slightly and he felt like he was only half awake.

“We should probably go back downstairs,” Mike said plainly, looking unaffected. Will drew in a deep breath to steady his thoughts and nodded. Mike stepped away and held out his hand for Will to take.

“Shall we?”

Will took his hand shakily and their fingers interlocked. They had actually held hands before. They did it a lot as kids until they were told they weren’t supposed to. Mike’s hands were much bigger now than they had been back then, and Will hoped his weren’t too sweaty.

They made their way downstairs, hand in hand in the dark living room. All eyes flicked over to them from the TV, aside from Max who hadn’t been looking in the first place.

“What took you so long?” she asked while everyone else silently clocked their intertwined hands.

“Uh, sorry. Headache,” Will said plainly.

“Bullshit,” Max called from the couch.

“What?”

“Bullshit. What happened?”

Although she was blind, Max still never missed anything.

“Uh, well,” Mike said, cheeks coloring, “Me and Will are kinda dating.”

Everyone was quiet for a moment and Will considered taking his chances with a tall building, but then there was a cacophony of, “Finally!” and “I knew it!”, which Mike made a face at, but said nothing.

Eventually, everyone was tired enough to actually go to sleep, and they began to settle into their sleeping bags.

“What are you doing?” Will asked as Mike pushed his sleeping bag closer to his.

“Shouldn’t we sleep together?”

Will’s mouth went dry at the wording and he just nodded mutely as he crawled in to go to sleep. Mike did the same, so close that Will could feel his breath on his nose. Those lips. He had kissed those lips. Rather poorly at first, but still. Mike shifted even closer and Will swore all of Hawkins could hear his heart beating. Everyone else had already fallen asleep, it being three in the morning, so it was really just them.

“Mike,” Will whispered, “No one’s watching.”

“Just to be safe,” Mike whispered back, and leaned in, pressing their lips together quickly before pulling away and laying his head down, still facing him. “Goodnight, boyfriend.”

Will sighed. “Goodnight.”

If this plan didn’t go to shit, he owed the universe a lot of money.

#byler #stranger things #fanfic #byler fanfic #mike wheeler #will byers #fake dating #mlm #wip

37 notes · View notes