#this is all wishful thinking btw im not actually bothered

[mynamesjameslynx1412]

lunar new year holiday ending

school tomorrow

[biaonww]

"something about you" rin itoshi based • angst based on not-so-bf trope <3

may contain errors, similar content is coincidental.

watching rin itoshi’s match is always mesmerizing. he shines in destroying things that are close to him.

it’s complete monstrosity when he plays, which is the complete opposite of his brother sae’s gameplay. 

a completely calculated person, while rin is a monster. 

but still—

why does rin still shine so much?

why does he stand out the most in your eyes, as if he was a twinkling star in the sky you would wish on?

why is he so captivating, yet always out of your hand?

bothered by your thoughts, rin wins his match. of course, another easy win for him. 

… but its noisy. it hurts your ears. 

announcers announcing his win.. interviewers excitingly waiting for him to get out of the stadium and start asking him questions… the horn sounds and people shrieking….

but everything goes quiet when he manages to find you straight away. 

no matter how many people are in the stalls—

his eyes always seem to capture you.

those beautiful eyes that could even challenge a diamonds beauty.

but there he is again, confusing you. 

he’s looking at you pleadingly, right after he scored the last shot.

shouldn’t he be focused on the crowd, and the way they scream his name in joy?

did he maybe finally realize that he left you mesmerized every single time?

did he maybe finally realize that you were always admiring him from afar?

or will he push you away again when he gives you mixed signals?

you sigh thinking of it, so you stand up, going to the exit of the stadium.

but once you finally reach the corridor, you see rin. 

so you pause from walking, while he jogs towards you.

“you should celebrate your win, itoshi.” you remark. 

“don’t call me itoshi.” he says in a tone that sounds like he’s still trying to catch his breath, while gripping your arm tightly.

(but of course, not in a way that would hurt you. he wouldn’t want that.). 

“i think it is only proper of me to call you itoshi. considering you never let me see what’s under your disguise.”

“i said don’t call me itoshi.”

“fine then.”

“— you know what, rin? i actually think it’s better if you keep pushing me away.”

“i mean i don’t know if you’re just another unreachable dream, or a one-in-a-million person i can achieve.”

“but i also don’t know if you’ll destroy me. which i’m scared of.”

“after all, you said everything that grows close to you soon tears down.”

you look at the floor, eyes slowly but surely becoming watery. 

rin stays quiet, his gaze softening when you immediately look down. 

“… if you’re scared of me destroying you, then i’ll try and treat you like a delicate flower.”

“if you ever get scared, i’ll stay by your side to keep you safe.”

“if you hate the noise, then i’ll cover your ears for you.”

“if i don’t show my true self to you, then i’ll lower my guard for you.”

“just don’t leave like everyone does. not like nii-san.”

“but instead stay. i’m humbly asking you to stay right now.”

“i’m sorry that i give you mixed signals. but give me a chance to prove myself to you, please?”

“i’m not perfect. i’m not the best yet. love is foreign to me. we may have fights and disagreements when we’re together. but for you, i’ll try.”

you finally look up at him, the tears in your eyes spilling out already.

but he wipes them for you, and looks at you so fondly. 

“then why couldn’t you do all this in the first place, you idiot?” you mumble. 

“i’m sorry.”

“but what’s your answer? will you accept me, or not?”

he chuckles softly, slowly letting down his facade for you. and only you. 

“… you know it’s a yes, rin.”

— fin.

now that im rereading this, it actually looks so SHITTY WTF... but i hope its good enough to be posted </3 reblogs, likes and comments are highly appreciated pls !! (btw, tags kinda foreshadow the fic so hehe)

[avan1i]

“can i have this dance?”

warnings: a kiss on the cheek, angst, thats it i think. (hermione is not in this story btw)

lorenzo berkshire x reader

where a gryffindor who hates slytherins gets swept off her feet by one at the yule ball..

“are you guys really not going to dance at all?” i huff, exasperated.

im currently sitting down at a table with ron and harry, watching boredly as everyone dances with their partners. i’d had to go with harry to the yule ball, because i (embarrassingly) had no one else to go with.

“correct.” says ron, lazily manspreading next to me.

i roll my eyes. padma patil is also sitting with us, as she’d come with ron. bad luck for her i guess. suddenly, she’s swept off by a hufflepuff boy, who asks her to dance.

“arm, leg, im yours!” she says excitedly.

i groan, watching her leave. god, im not too fond of dancing, but anything would be better than this. i scan the large ballroom, and my eyes land on the slytherin boys. the only ones with dates are draco and blaise. the others just go with anyone they want, it gives them more freedom i suppose. then, i could’ve sworn i caught lorenzo berkshire’s eye. i brush it off, shaking my head. i mean, how could i have?

the music changes to a slow, romantic song. im just about to get up and leave to go to the bathroom to avoid the embarrassment, when ron speaks up, surprised.

“what the hell does that old git want?” he says judgmentally. i look up and follow his gaze, and see enzo berkshire walking towards us. ron’s right, what could he possibly want?

we watch cautiously, as he gradually comes closer, his stupid smirk plastered on his face. i frown at him, wondering if he’s confused or something. the slytherin boys hate our trio, and we hate them. what’s going on?? he walks up to us, and holds out his arm to me.

“can i have this dance?” he asks calmly, his lips curling into a smug smirk. i look at ron and harry, confused. they’re giving me a ‘dont you dare’ look. i mean.. its only one dance.. and i want to have a good night. the yule ball only happens once!

i take his arm, and he sweeps me away onto the dance floor. i dont bother looking back at harry and ron’s outraged expressions, i know that they hate lorenzo. my cheeks turn a light shade of pink as he grabs my waist, pulling me closer. i sling my hands over his neck, as we sway to the rhythm of the slow song.

“are you drunk?” i murmur to him. im still trying to wrap my head around the fact he’s asked me to dance, out of all these girls.

“what? no, of course not. why do you ask?” he asks, smiling slightly. gosh, sometimes i wish i could slap that smirk off his face.

“no reason.” i mutter.

after the song ends, he asks me if i want a drink. it surprises me, as i thought he’d just ditch me and go find another girl to flirt with. i excuse myself to go and ask harry and ron if they want one quickly. enzo doesnt mind, and kisses me on the cheek, before going to talk to one of his fellow slytherin mates. stunned, i turn on my heel and walk back to harry and ron.

“oh you’re finally back are you? have fun with that prat? you looked like you did.” snarled ron.

“what are you talking about? it was one dance, nothing happened!” i say, annoyed.

ron gets up, practically dragging harry with him. i run after them, furious. my heels click and clack as i walk frustratedly down the cold, uninviting hallway. suddenly, ron turns around.

“what the bloody hell do you want now?” he yells.

“why are you so fucking annoying? all i did was dance with someone, because youre too lazy to get up off your ass!” i scream at him, tears forming in my eyes. i know im ruining my makeup, but i dont care at this point.

“we all agreed that we hate them, and you just HAVE to rebel against the rules, dont you?” he spat.

“rebel? what is this, some sort of cult?!”

“im sick of this, why dont you go and get your face eaten off by that berkshire git? its all he wants from you. you’re stupid honestly, thinking he actually likes you.” he yells at me.

i stand there in shock, tears pouring down. harry and him run up the stairs, as ron mutters to harry,

“they get scary when theyre older.”

“ron, you spoiled EVERYTHING!” i yell at him. they rush off and i sit down on the stairs, yanking my shoes off, and start sobbing.

A/N: this was pretty bad im ngl, i kinda ran out of ideas at the end, so its pretty repetitive. my next post will be better i promise!

[mazzystar24]

actually the hospital wing joke is starting to bother me a lot more because buck actually fucking died 😭and he didnt even change clothes from being at the hospital all day why would you say that to someone. ik it was a fakeout but bobby looked like he was fr coding on the table. and like just a couple weeks before chimney almost died?? like im sorry i only accept those kinda jokes from people who have known me for years and even then they can be a little upsetting.

thats the thing though!!!! id be perfectly fine with buck and tommy if they gave us more than actual crumbs. 709 felt like buck had more chemistry with ravi in the same scene that tommy was in! they’re supposed to be dating so why do they feel like colleagues? and why are the more emotional and vulnerable scenes getting given to EDDIE if they want me to support buck and tommy as a couple? why wasnt tommy at the hospital with them considering he’s said multiple times he wishes he had a family like the 118 does? why are the only times hes on screen now only establishing his jealousy and that gerrard exists? is that the only reason why hes still here?

actually i wanna get back to 706. it wouldve been so easy to keep tommy there but they wrote him out of most of the episode 😭 he couldve said for the bachelor party! he couldve helped them find chimney! he couldve done literally ANYTHING. chimney was confused as hell as to why he even showed up at the wedding at all 😭 but no!!! they had him show up, ignore what buck wanted, then leave so we could have buck and eddie performing their drunk mating rituals or whatever 🤸‍♂️ but yeah buddie who?

also im never letting go of the wedding singer comment btw because what was that. why did they make tommy reference a movie where the two leads in the ROMANTIC COMEDY start the story dating the wrong people. i feel insane about it actually. also him calling buck evan will forever confuse me until we get an actual acknowledgement in canon because literally why

and the humor falls so flat but eddie has the same type of humor and it never does. he was making fun of buck in 706 (the making chimneys wedding about him line) but it never actually felt serious to me?

anyway sorry for yelling in your inbox i have a lot of mixed emotions about this season -birthmark anon

Yes totally get that like I’m the same like me and my best friend will be saying downright horrendous trauma jokes to eachother that make people around us clutch their pearls but I feel like it takes a certain level of rapport to get to trauma joke level - ig not everyone is the same when it comes to that but I think that again the writers absolutely failed to give us enough bucktommy scenes that justify having this kinda line

AGHSKF NOT THE BUCK /RAVI AHJDKFKF 😭😭😭 THIS IS ESPECIALLY FUNNY WHEN YOU SEE THE BUCKTOMMY SCENE AT THE CEREMONY VS THOSE BUCKLEY DIAZ FAMILY STILLS (still bitter the scene got cut) like someone explain to me why the actual couple is coming across less couple-y

ALSO FR THO THE SARDONIC ENERGY IS JUST NOT BEING BALANCED RIGHT like it’s coming across more 🧍

Like i can’t remember who I was talking to the other day but I was saying like this 🧍emoji just embodies Tommy to me

EXACTLYYYYY LIKE PURELY UNHINGED TO HAVE SUCH AN EMOTIONAL EPISODE AND MAKE NO EFFORT TO USE THOSE EMOTIONAL BEATS TO DEVELOP THEIR DYNAMIC BUT INSTEAD CONTRAST THAT WITH THE VULNERABILITY BETWEEN BUCK AND EDDIE THIS EPISODE

AHSJKF we going back to 7x06 and that’s so valid of us AGSJKF DRUNK MATING RITUALS AHJDKFKF STOP IM CACKLING

THE WEDDING SINGER COMMENT HAUNTS ME ISTG BECAUSE EVERY NOW AND THEN ILL REMEMBER THIS COSTUME DETAIL AND WAKE UP IN A COLD SWEAT:

THE CALLING HIM EVAN THING I LEGIT MADE LIKE THREE THEORIES ON RANGING FROM POSITIVITY TO NEGATIVITY

YES ABOUT THE HUMOUR like there just isn’t that balance or lightness to even the joke out, like I’m a big dry humour and sarcastic girlie but it’s just not being delivered right in a way idk if it’s the writing or the acting or just the fact its most his very small screentime but it’s just falling flat to me

Never apologise for yelling in my inbox babe and same for the mixed emotions

Love ya birthmark anon byee 🫶🫶

[sacred-coffin]

Terzomega thoughts incoming. this might be long so im gonna put it under a cut. And this might be me projecting my "prince and his knight" obsession but i dont care i do what i WANT !!!!!!!!

I feel like Omega was pining for Terzo from the very start. I think Cardinals would have their own assigned ghoul (yeah, that makes more sense than my previous idea), and Omega was Terzo's. It was Terzo's choice, actually. The ghouls would act as assistants and guards, for the most part. So there wasn't much time when they weren't together (much to Terzo's initial disappointment). He picked Omega because he was quiet (and a real piece of eye candy, but he won't admit to that) and figured he would bother Terzo the least.

And they did get along well! Surprisingly well, actually. Terzo's brothers really expected him to go through all the ghouls in the Abbey and never be satisfied with any of them. What's even more surprising though, is that Omega was perfectly happy to work with Terzo as well. Often Omega would find himself being 'lectured' by Terzo, but it was really more like infodumping if you ask me. He had no idea how badly he wanted someone to listen to him talk about his interests. But... If you asked Terzo, though, he would still say that Omega was annoying, he wished he could be alone more often, etc. etc. Omega refused to discuss how he felt about working with Terzo in depth. Just that he enjoyed the work and Terzo wasn't bad company.

Things got a little awkward when Omega was asked to be apart of the Ghost project, but he was the best choice they had. Terzo claimed that he "wouldn't mind a little more alone time" with Omega busy. Unfortunately he had a ghoul assigned to him whenever Omega was away, and Terzo very quickly realized that he missed Omega. Like a lot. I don't know who they replaced him with, but whoever it was Terzo just did NOT like. So whenever Omega came back from his first tour, it was a pretty big surprise to see Terzo happy to see him. Suddenly Terzo is inviting Omega to join him, instead of trying to convince him to leave. He's asking Omega questions about himself. Terzo may not be falling in love yet, but Omega has definitely got it BAD now if he hadn't already.

Omega desperately wants to do anything he can to make Terzo smile, to help him succeed. Whether he knows it or not, Terzo has Omega wrapped around his finger. Terzo wants to be left alone? No one will be allowed within a 20ft radius of whatever room Terzo is in. Someone made Terzo upset? At best, they get the scare of their life. At worst, they get the last scare of their life. He is a demon from hell, after all. Something very primal about his love (or obsession?)

I don't know what finally has them admit their feelings, but when it happens? No one sees them for at least a week.

:3c

Edit btw. Terzo flirts with Omega often, even before he realized that he had feelings for Omega. It started as friendly teasing and banter at first, but it ALWAYS drove Omega insane. He's just so very good at hiding it.

[genderqueerdykes]

heya

i can't sleep because my sexuality in relationship to my gender has been bothering me.

im transmasc, but genderfluid. not just boy/girl genderfluidity, it's all over the place. and i feel like i identify with being a gay man sometimes, and i also go through periods of feeling like a masculine lesbian.

i know how controversial this is and it breaks my heart because i can't figure out what to do. i know my identity should be for me, but i don't want to make people uncomfortable if i come off as a boy who's a lesbian sometimes.

also i feel intense imposter syndrome over this when i switch around. but it undeniably makes me feel like myself when i say I'm a transmasc genderfluid bi lesbian, which makes me feel good of course. i just wish i could stop feeling bad about it

is any of this normal and is there any other genderfluid ppl with complicated relationships to their sexuality? i feel alone here i guess

love your blog btw makes me happy and validated when i read what you and your followers have to say to people 💖

hello! thanks for stopping by!

i think it can be very easy to work ourselves up and over think things when it comes to how people will receive us in queer spaces- online queer spaces have been needlessly hostile over the past few years, mostly due to the relative anonymity and virtually zero consequences for being harmful and rude. it's okay to get scared sometimes

it may seem 'contradictory' or 'controversial' but it isn't that uncommon to go from identifying as a gay man to identifying as a masculine lesbian! genderfluidity means your genders can be. whatever. there's no set rules, and it's okay if your attraction changes when your gender does. mine does, as well. abrosexual and abroromantic may suit you

you don't have to pass any tests or anything like that to be successfully seen as genderfluid, it's okay if you change to be whatever, whenever. i always identify as a butch lesbian & a femme gay bear, all the time, no matter how I feel or who is fronting in my system. while some cishets may not get it, most queer people i explain this to say "oh yeah, i totally caught that vibe"

it can be scary to have "Strange" identities, but the meaning of "queer" is literally "weird" and having a weird identity falls right in line with the community. you're allowed to be a transmasculine lesbian, and you are even allowed to be a male/boy lesbian- there is no actual cosmic rule stating that lesbians cannot be men, partially men, or be genderfluid and be men sometimes

regardless of how others perceive you, you know who you are. you are the arbiter of your lived experience, and while someone misinterpreting you can be painful and inconvenient, it shouldn't define your experience. if people don't understand, keep going til you find the ones who do, and the ones who try to. even if people don't "Get" your gender, there are a lot of folks who will respect it, anyways, and you deserve that

hope that helps and makes sense. take care of yourself, good luck out there. there are no rules when it comes to be genderfluid. genderfluid people are encouraged to fuck with gender, rules, roles, presentation, etc. and it's only natural that a genderfluid person will have identities that "conflict" when approached through a non-queer lens. identities don't have to "make sense", they are mostly comprised of feelings !

good luck out there! feel free to stop by again

[crystallizsch]

Hi...I'm new to the twst fandom, and i saw you help out someone else with recommendations so i was hoping you could help me tooo? 🥺 I'm worried about bothering people with asks and stuff, so i was wondering if you had any recommendations for blogs of nice/welcoming people in the fandom? 👉👈 It would be nice to make some friends...

You seem really friendly and welcoming, which is why I managed to send this...I just don't want to annoy anyone...💔💀 Thanks!!!!!!!!

AWHH HELLO HI WHAT THANK YOU SO MUCH??

i sometimes worry that i may be too overwhelming (if that’s the right word for it???) to even approach so that means so much to hear 😭💖💕

also i MAY have rambled too much,,, i ended up giving (unsolicited) advice as well im so sorry but i just wanted to say some additional things too about making friends in the fandom in general 🤧

anyways anon it’s all right under the cut 💖

AAGH FIRSTLY welcome to the twst fandom!! so glad to see you joining in!

i’ve only been in the fandom since the beginning of this year actually! and so far as my experience goes it’s been so fun!! people create amazing things and share amazing ideas with one another so i hope you enjoy your stay!

ALSO it makes me happy that you even think i’m approachable enough for recs 😭💖

i'm admittedly very biased though because a lot of the blogs i consider nice/welcoming are already mutuals/friends of mine 🤧

and i’m lowkey highkey kind of shy mentioning them again ahglsjdlsalk so i’d like to point you back to that original post here even though im assuming that you literally just came from there 😭

im so sorry i couldnt be more helpful with recs 😭💔 but all of them i do consider pretty nice blogs!!

ANYWAYS PLEASE DONT WORRY ABOUT “ANNOYING” ANYONE YOU ARE NOT A BOTHER most people love receiving asks/interactions!!

i really understand the feeling though!! it’s hard making that first move sometimes,,, and honestly (i know it sounds incredibly cliche but) you’ll never really know if you’ll click with someone here until you try!!

and i'm not sure if you post or not but! it's definitely how I've met the people i’m mutuals/friends with here!

i’ve made friends with others who regularly/every now and then reblog with nice tags or comments on my posts ;;; and i do the same on my main blog! i tend to leave a lot of tags when i reblog posts that i like

and sometimes it just,,, happens??? especially if you and the other person have a shared interest in the fandom!

anyways,,,

send people asks!! reblog with nice tags!! comment!! just let other people that you're there!! the right people for you will reciprocate 💖💖💖 (also this is in no way being against people who just prefer to silently lurk/interact btw i still appreciate you guys 🫶 this is just for if you want to interact more and make friends in the process!!)

but that's just me!!

similar to what i said on the original post i encourage you to find and interact with other people that you think you would vibe with!!

there's a lot of different corners in this fandom that are into way different things about the game than me. and the people that i vibe with might not necessarily vibe with you which is not anyone's fault!! it’s just the way it is 💖

(also i forgot to mention this in my original post --- i'm not sure if you're a minor or not so make sure if you decide to check out some blogs allow minors to interact 🙏 ) (and a lot of blogs outline their boundaries and rules on their intro posts that are pinned so keep that in mind!)

i have no idea how to end this hsjshsjs but generally just find others who like the same twst things as you and interact with them!! it’s okay to do little by little until you’re comfortable, there is never any rush 🫶

AGAIN i hope you have fun here and i wish you the best!! 💖💖💕

[lobotomyloser]

BODIES OF WATER : novel introduction

Okay so, I’ve been working on this for a few months and it’s on draft one/two. And I have finished it but I don’t wish to go further with it bcs it sucks! imo its very cringe and unrealistic whatever. But I was actually excited about this story idea, i don’t think i’ve managed to execute it in the way I wanted to. Nonetheless, im just going to start posting chapters each week on tumblr so it doesn’t go to complete waste like my other novels.

Heres a brief summary, please interact if you are interested.

Btw, there is no smut, my works are for young adults, there will never be anything sexual, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to be a light read. It touches on a lot of heavy topics.

Synopsis/summary

Neera is not your typical girl. There’s something wrong with her, always has been and she’s not daft enough to not notice.The thing is she doesn’t care. Her reputation could be tossed and turned over, one thing for sure is that she needed to have control. The only person she bothered to get close enough to went missing, two years ago in her hometown…just after she moved. Her grandmother lives there now, and while going to visit her she sees him. She’s sure. So Neera risks everything to stay and uncover some things. Curiosity kills the cat, but this cat kills her curiosity.

Okay yeah that was pretty shit, im not good at introducing projects. But i hope its enough to have you interested.

Genres: thriller, satire, psychological horror etc.

Before you do give your full attention, heres all the warnings (save yourself)

This may come across as offensive to all parties,

I have tried my best to research for my character with a mental illness (ASPD)

Do not expect my representation to be completely accurate as we are between the lines of fiction.

This book is not romanticising any of these themes, these are real issues of today, some more unrealistic

yet nothing is being romanticised, on that note, please do not romanticise mental illnesses and toxic relationships.

⚠️ rude humour, obscenity, themes of abuse, toxic relations, implied drug usage, grotesque, blood, killings, cannibalistic themes etc.

Please take care of yourself and get off of this if you cannot read such.

Anyways, those of you that have decided to stay, WELCOME!!

First chapter (https://www.tumblr.com/lobotomyloser/759060318014111744/bodies-of-water-chapter-one)

Please follow my ig (writergram) for more updates; l0botomy_loser

[dgaftilwedie]

actually......... previous post reminded me of ANOTHER event with this guy (im oversharing)

so i have like a huge issue with hazbin hotel. idc if you like it, that's all you. but i cannot get into that show because of a previous traumatic event that i don't wish to speak of. ESPECIALLY alastor and angel dust. super triggering to talk about. I SWEAR THIS IS IMPORTANT CONTEXT.

anyways, i was talking to this guy and we got on the topic of things that triggered us (he claimed he wanted to look out for me) and i was like "oh yeah yknow hazbin hotel-" and he goes "WHAT?? WHY??" and for the next fucking hour he goes on a rant about how it "isn't really that bad" and how i was "being dramatic" and he told me that he was sure i'd love it because "it's a vulgar show and you're a vulgar person" (thanks a lot <3 definitely makes me feel good about myself!!!!!!!!!)

and then he starts explaining the characters to me, trying to make the show seem more appealing, and the whole time im like sitting on the other end of the conversation (which was over discord btw) fucking SHAKING because all he was doing was comparing our friendship to alastor and angel dust. which is quite literally the same comparison between me and another ex friend that made is such a problem media for me then.

and it bothers me so much to fucking think about because this prick would get mad if i even ALLUDED TO the south. he'd get so fucking pissy if i brought up one of my interests that he didn't like. but he was allowed to sit there and try to force me to like something that genuinely makes me sick to my stomach?????

AND WHAT DIDN'T HELP IS THE PERSON THAT CAUSED THAT MEDIA TO BE SUCH AN ISSUE TO ME WHAT HIS EX PARTNER, WHO I'D TOLD HIM SEVERAL TIMES WAS A HORRIBLE FUCKING PERSON!!!!!!! AND HE IGNORED ME EVERY SINGLE TIME UNTIL AFTER THEY BROKE UP. AND THEN HE TRIED TO APOLOGIZE BUT HE DIDN'T MEAN A SINGLE WORD OF IT BC HE DID THE SAME THINGS TO ME THAT HIS EX PARTNER DID!!!!!!!! but nawwwwww i was just being "overdramatic" :33 i need to get over myself :'((

[pink-strawberry-kissess]

I don't know if this has been asked or if you've talked about it, - and I do apologize for any clumsiness in how I sound - but do you think Ada would have any complicated feelings regarding how she's been objectified, sexually or otherwise, in-universe, whether it's by someone like Simmons, people she's worked for etc?

i'm gonna ramble a bit here so sorry in advance lol-

i think that the trauma she experienced from simmons is one that's glossed over a lot. especially the people who are like AdA doEsNt hAve AnY tRaUmA

people are SO FUCKING QUICK to baby leon, but if it's a woman- oh NOOO she doesn't deserve the same thing

one of my major gripes with a lot of people who "aren't happy with ada's redesign" (characterization, voice, style) etc. (ALSO YOU CAN GO PLAY THE OLD GAMES BTW THEY STILL EXIST. ) bother me a lot

it's 2023. can we not have ada be an actual woman character with likes/desires/dislikes/flaws/and a personality that isn't just "sexy asian spy lady" like have we regressed so much that when capcom literally designed ada to be almost completely covered from her neck down was a way to have her be less sexualized? (btw for the people mad about that, she still has her alt outfit!!! so stfu!!!)

also she was still sexy af??? she doesn't need to be literally naked for her to be sexy. (also there needs to be more talk about consent imo cause i really feel like the way people talk about ada makes me think they do not understand consent)

ada's always used her sex appeal in varying degrees in the games/movies. but it was always to her advantage (almost in a way so that she wasn't objectified unless she wanted it that way)

in regards to her damnation outfit and her re6 outfit, which i argue are still sexy but not as revealing as her re4 outfit. i think that was also capcom in a way to modernize her outfits but still have it be her. like okay i know people love her og re4 outfit, but it makes NO SENSE. and because of it, it's one of my least favourite outfits because of how impractical it is. i don't mind her re4r alt outfit though, it's still fuckin hot but yeah (i still think the og re4 dress is really cunty tho skfbsfjs it's good, it's just not my favourite, og re2 is also one of my least faves, the flats and the dress + leggings combo)

also yeah to go back to her trauma, i really wish we saw what she felt at the end of re2r, especially if she thought she was going to die. like- how traumatic is that. the way she also fell, but took the time to comfort leon before dropping. SHE DIDN'T CARE THAT SHE WAS GONNA FALL, SHE COMFORTED LEON FIRST

we still don't know if she knew that she was going to be fine or not. if she fell into water (which i hc more cause she's not seen with a hookshot prior so i don't really hc that she had it the whole time.)

i see that as a common hc that she had one that wesker gave her so that she could get out and survive the fall, but i just legit think she fucking fell. landed into water or something that made it so she was okay. and then figured out how to get out later. (with the help of wesker)

but yeah i do not hc the hook shoot reason.

ANYWAYS MAYBE WE'LL GET TO SEE IT??? SEPARATE WAYS INTRO??? PLEASE??????

also it's clear to me that simmons was fucking obsessed with her and she had to literally break ties with him because he was fucking insane, she knew he was a lost cause. i don't think she'd even entertain him at all, to work with him, so it seemed as she cut ties as soon as she could. i do think that he harassed her a lot, but it's also probably traumatic when she discovers that simmons killed hundreds of women to try and clone ada.

uh im eepy but i'll talk about this more later maybe lol

[mihai-florescu]

Have you seen that one twitter post?

"I wish I lacked critical thinking skills yall seem so happy"

Feels very you-core, especially in regards to enstar fans that don't read/bother to understand the stories

I hate the trend of people referring to others as "NPCs" as im sure everyone has a beautiful inner life and worth. However. I am also half convinced people who comment shit like "the curtains are just blue" "it's not that deep" "what's bro yapping about" and so on and so forth are actually not real and just a psyop to lower the rest of the population's intelligence on social media. (This is said lightheartedly and halfjokingly but also...well...)

If whats seen as cool is refusal to engage with media earnestly that you supposedly do like, or refusal to try to find meaning through analysis, instead chasing ratios and whatnot, then how are we going to expect these people to question anything else in life. You then get on one hand the people who just blindly follow ideas without doing their own research to decide whether they actually believe in something or not as long as they look good to other people who do the same. And on the other hand the people who look at ads with clear symbolism meant to convey something (all ads...are made to convey something...otherwise they wouldnt be made...) and say "youre reading too much into it" (this is an actual response i saw to the outrage sparked by the new zara campaign that came out a few weeks ago, you know the one)

Idk. Im aware i sound like an insane pretentious and annoying old man yelling at clouds which is why i kept this ask in my inbox for a week as i am a bit. Scared. To say my thoughts openly anymore.:)) It isnt that i was ignoring you anon, i'd love it if you came off anon to talk if you ever wanted. This isnt just about ES to me btw, but i do believe fandom culture and media engagement is indicative of greater trends and issues. But at the same time... i think people have always been shallow, it's just that now due to the internet we're simply more aware of others' actions and beliefs, we're connected for better or for worse. For both. I wonder if the 1950s had their equivalent of a ratio...

[b1rdbra1ned]

Oh no I hate Fan too. Fan was not a good character in season 2 and he didn't actually face any consequences for his actions. Paintbrush was like the closest we got to Fan being criticised and people considered PB to be the one overreacting. Paintbrush is done so dirty because the fandom put their own belief about the bright lights being family even though Paintbrush never actually got along with them. They talked to tt like once, bickered with lb until the last ep they were in and then there's. Fan..

Also I think I hate fantube a little more after the theyrebasicallycanon polls put enstars against ii. Glad rinniki won they deserve the win against fantube imo.

Sorry I was tired of being critical of ii so I don't like it anymore 😔

But hiiii we haven't talked much in a while ik :(( I'm on holiday rn but feel free to talk to me if you want!

ALLLL OF THIS

Paintbrush was in every way in the right to yell at fan, he constantly bothered and nagged at them and the stuff about marshmallow was definitely the final straw

i only ever liked the whole bright lights family thing because honestly it could’ve worked imo!!! but they just never took that chance they never really developed the brights lights AT ALL most season (beside from marshmallow) the bright light felt more like the comical team (not really but can’t think of a better way to describe them) compared to the grand slams who definitely got way more focus and development

it’s shitty because i think the brights lights could’ve had potential but they were just casted aside until the last few episodes where “oh hey look development!! :] oh wait nvm they’re eliminated now <3” like ????

paintbrush definitely got the short end of the stick here. literally having what was supposed to be their episode mainly centred around tt and lb and having their feelings about marsh being completely casted aside. i wish more was done w/ marshmallow and them vs them and lb

looking back a lot of their scenes w lb just felt kinda off??? i don’t think can articulate this probably rn but paintbrush deserved better

but at the same time i wish the team got more time w/ each other in general, they have so many great opportunities to do it like in the maze episodes but again they’re kinda just cast aside as just comedy

and w/ s3 oh boy i hate what they did with paintbrush and their “arc” in the last few episodes. they quite literally and figuratively took away their edges, i miss sassy, sarcastic confident paintbrush they feel so dulled down in iii and it’s like no one in the writing team understands them at all. it’s like they didn’t even write s2 (but hey back to the point i mentions last post that show writers really ought to stop listening to fans sometimes because this is how fanon seeps in </3)

i hate how the a lot of the fans view paintbrush especially if it’s only ever in the context of lightbrush or shipping (another thing that pisses me off btw is how they’re always treated as irrational and or just plain out abusive FUCK PEOPLE WHO PORTRAY PAINTBRUSH LIKE THIS)

they’re such a great character who gets absolutely fucked over by the writing and fandom (not all of the fandom of course, i love seeing ppls takes and discussions on them but it’s just some fans who just </3)

i don’t like discouraging ships, if ppl are mature and respectful and don’t put other ppl down then that’s all great and stuff but my problem is that i really wish paintbrush was just seen as more than their ships yknow

Fan is.. the more i think about canon him the more im like yeaaa… uh no thanks…. (mainly w/ him and paintbrush and cabby)

idk if im even allowed to say they changed tt this season because.. she didn’t honestly have a lot of screentime last season compared to a whole lot of other characters, but in iii she feels off?? honestly all of them do even the new contestants later on during the season

idk if i have the words to describe why s3’s characterisation is so off and at time frustrating, their arcs too, was going to point out some characters but honestly i could make a case for nearly ALL the contestants the ones who weren’t voted out early at least

that’s the end of my ramble tho, sorry ik i talked a lot about paintbrush, i want to talk about the others too but they’re the one i still even think about. hopefully this isn’t a bit hard to read, ik im not that organised w my rambles sometimes

[alinktoana]

new yakuza game, new reasons to be upset at rgg ✨

im not even gonna consider kiwami 1 or 2 bc i havent played them and i dont think they should matter to the point i want to make

but youre telling that guy

and this guy

are the same person?

did that coma erase kiryu's memories of majima or is this yokoyama talking out of his ass bc he doesnt see why majima should even exist?

at this point im blaming everything thats upsetting to me about yakuza on yokoyama lmao the guy has given us many great things but the direction rgg is going with kiryu is so weird. specially given theyre bringing him back basically for marketing purposes, it amazes me how *he* doesnt understand how majima is a marketing darling.

dont get me wrong, i dont mind majima not being on Y8. i *wish* kiryu wasnt there, bc it's time for ichiban&gang to shine. i love the idea of gaiden, ishin and other spin offs, so we can go on playing with kiryu in other bits of his story, and other characters, but *ive said it once and ill say it again, the torch has been passed on, kiryu has been saying goodbye on as many games as he's been in*. even though yokoyama has been there from the beginning, and rgg really didnt give us much interaction, Y3 gave us so much emotion and told us about their bond rather than showed (i mean, for the most part - again, i wouldve loved to have seem more, and im guessing that's what the kiwamis are for). and now you're telling me Y6 kiryu doesnt understand him. wow. date talks about understanding kiryu bc theyve known each other for ages. and kiryu doesnt *get* majima. sure. one of the things that really stuck to me playing ps2 Y1 is that kiryu and majima really are batman and joker, and it's baffling good how they actually got mark hamill to voice majima. and im not here for batman at all, but it's the trope. it's hamilton and burr, it's edward teach and izzy hands (lol), heck, it's jesus and judas (not all my musical theater references showing lol hey taika 😉) . it's not about villany or anything, it's about them being equal power houses on their town, it's about ying and yang, it's even reminiscent of nishiki and kiryu. and i got that just by playing the games. so if the person writing them doesnt see it, that's concernin lol whats good? lmao whats even real? the gaslighting yokoyama lmao

sometimes i forget why i say Y3 is my favorite but that kind of thing reminds me why.

also bless ugaki, a character he's played for years being dissed by his own creator to his face and he's smiling. never change ugaki, never change. (btw credit to the awesome people who uploaded the game footage on yt) also bless ugaki, a character he's played for years being dissed by his own creator to his face and he's smiling. never change ugaki, never change. (btw credit to the awesome people who uploaded the game footage on yt) edit: yeah i didnt bother looking at credits but apparently yokoyama was pretty hands off on Y6, im just being blindly biased :v i should stop lmao *but my concerns about rgg's direction with kiryu remain, regardless who is actually penned anything*

[starjxsung]

hi baby <333 i hope you had the absolute best time at the ateez concert!! i saw some clips on twt and i died, they looked soooo good😭

it’s been a really rough month in every sense tbh. i still haven’t heard back from the practicum but im not even bothering to write anymore. and we’re coping alright now with the doggy passing away but the first few days were really rough. i think we (but especially my bf and his fam) were clinging too much to her when she was clearly too sick </3 but all is well. thank you for the good wishes. i really appreciate them.

my bf literally stole his brother’s record player to play the ateez album for me so i vote for you to do it too😂

and about jisung, like, i literally said the same thing. i was just like “i’d have babies with any of them, they don’t even have to raise them”. (i dont plan on ever having kids either or particularly like those that aren’t part of my family) even my bf said it was understandable😂 the european air really did a number on them bc they looked so so so so good.

AND BTW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT JISUNG SUPPOSEDLY HAVING A CHEST TATTOO BC IM DYING. that is the single sexiest thing he could’ve done.

and i did hear about taemin’s tour and im so manifesting having money to be able to go😭😭😭😭 but idk if i’ll skip it to financially recover from skz (in general, they manage all my money. they’re doing a terrible job).

anyways, i love you so much bb i hope all is well. i can’t wait to hear about your ateez concerts. i’m so excited! (alsoooo lolla is in 2 weeks!!! and they have plant based options now, as a person who occasionally eats meat but doesn’t like the taste, i cheered). take care my love <3

-🐈‍⬛

hi baby !!!!!!!! Ahhhhh Ateez was insane 😭😭 there were so many sweet atinys around us and I got the cutest freebies <3 we tried to get merch beforehand but it was SO much more crowded this time around so a lot of it was sold out which was such a bummer ☹️ I did manage to get a Seonghwa picket but I’m gonna try to get there a little earlier for tomorrow’s show for a tshirt 🫶 fingers crossed they have them in stock this time ! I did feel super bad bc Seonghwa’s grandfather passed away the day before my show so he was crying during his ments and I just wanted to give him the biggest hug ☹️ I hope he’s doing a little better but I can’t imagine how hard it must be for him 💔 I just landed in LA a few hours ago so I’ll let you know how tomorrow’s show goes !!

Ugh I’m so sorry to hear that you still haven’t heard from your practicum 😞 I don’t even blame you for not reaching out anymore, I’d give up too. I just can’t believe how incompetent they’ve been throughout the whole process. And on top of all the stress with your bf’s dog, and just in the midst of such a busy time. I am so so sorry and I’ll keep manifesting that things start looking up soon 🫶 my sister actually didn’t end up coming to LA and she’s not going to Lolla after all bc she’s just too stressed about her internship and she doesn’t feel like she can fully enjoy anything right now. It really sucks to travel solo after all but I don’t blame her and I’m so frustrated for both of you. Sending you all my love and hoping they get back to you soon :(

PLSSSS the Jisung thing is so real 😭😭 ALSO YES I HEARD ABOUT THE TATTOO I genuinely couldn’t use my phone for a good hour after reading the news bc I was tweaking so hard LIKE RIGHTTT ON THE JITTIES™️ IS INSAAAAANE………. I saw a sketch of what its presumed to look like and I think it’s so sweet that he got it for his family 🥹 Jisung my beloved (he actually got my name tattooed it’s true)

Also manifesting Taemin US dates soooo hard 😔🤞 the first set of dates are all Asia which I’m not surprised about but I hope he comes back to LA at least !!

I love you so so much bby I can’t wait to tell you all about LA !!!! And then Lolla next oh my god it doesn’t feel real 😭 also I did NOT hear about the plant based options and as a vegetarian that’s like…. The next best thing after seeing Jisung in the flesh 💓❣️🙏

Ateez pics ofc also peep my little Ateez pajama shirt I bought for LA 👼🫶💓💓💓

[fraternum-momentum]

Okay, so let me ramble abt making the last comic, cause that was an absolute behemoth to work on, and I have a lot of thoughts in my head. Man, I don't know how those webtoon artists do it every week. They scare me now.

This is super long btw, so get cozy if you want to read :]

Starting off, I actually got this idea from my lil 'ol diary I keep by my tableside :] I like writing down what I feel so I can see it in a more concrete(?) manner, helps me cope i think. One time, I really did cry for someone because I guess I just really liked them a lot. Having crushes is fun, but catching feelings isn't.

I always get this giddy feeling of being head over heels for someone. Every interaction is so exciting. Intoxicating even. And I couldn't get enough of it, but after that few seconds of bliss I immediately think to myself that all these scenarios in my head will never happen, not in a million fucking years. I just preemptively reject myself without ever telling the person what I feel. I know what the outcome will be anyway, and I'm afraid of what will happen if I did say anything. It's just too risky.

The second half is completely made up tho, I will never ever kidnap someone... unless? (For legal reasons, I will have to clarify that this is a joke, Thank you.)

Now onto the comic itself!

The composition is probably the easiest and the most fun part. I love, love, love, how versatile you can be in the webtoon format. Figuring out how to transition the panels is super fun, and it sucks that most of the webcomics I see on tapas or webtoon, etc. are just sticking to those boring box formulas over and over again when it has so much potential, although there are exceptions like, for example, Lore Olympus. While it has it's fair share of flaws when in comes to other aspects, you can't deny the artist's talent esp when it comes to knowing how to place the character in an illustration, (again) the compositioning etc etc. (ep. 8 is p good. They stick to the box stuff during dialogue but gets more experimental in some parts. I haven't been keeping up with it, so idk any other good eps)

One of my only big regrets is that I wish I had made the space between the '...but I love it." and "And soon..." parts longer. I think it changed scenarios way too fast and your eye immediately moves onto the next piece of text,, but eh, it is what it is, and I can't be bothered to edit it so ig I gotta learn to live with it.

It's still messy in,, a lot of parts actually, and I still can't do lineart to save my life, but i kinda tried just cleaning up the sketches instead???? I mean, it kinda works, but it isn't really smooth so,, And there are small mistakes here and there that I could've fixed or colored stuff in properly or whatever. But at that point, I'm just done with it. No more. Am tired and want to draw other shit now. Maybe boobs n dicks n pussy-

Oh actually i have another comic in my wip folder that I started before the sad Kylar crying one. Here's some of the thumbnails for it:

the fucking lisa simpson looking ass face just cracks me up every time I see it LMAOQJSJQJ I just wanted to show it to u but stay tuned for that ig

I eventually want to make little comics like this for other characters as well! Like Sydney, who is also one of my favorites cause of the whole religion aspect to them, and I would like to tackle that topic with yet another super personal experience of mine that for some reason I'm comfortable with sharing with a bunch of ppl lmao

I also really want to make a full on nsfw one, like gut rearranging, carnal fucking, hardcore banging,, ok ill stop. But I do need to do more,, uh, "research" on that,, i swear it's research, i have no clue how im gonna draw it. Hell, I already struggle with drawing people fucking and imagine adding cool transitions to that. Guess even my masochistic tendencies extend to this shit too.

And I think that's pretty much it? I'll probably just stick to b and w or monotone with a few accent colors because i just know that it would break me if i did a fully colored one.

Okay, thank you for reading this ramble, I'll go ahead and answer some asks now,, Here's your prize though!

[trickstarbrave]

I just had an au idea heavily inspired by Shamat and Riiju-lei….

Im half awake and on my phone btw pardon any typos or if it’s incoherent

Yknow Nerevarine becomes Nerevar and it’s the 4th era and all that. Except Nerevar and Voryn last left off on a really bad note. Voryn was already super corrupted by the heart but Nerevar thought he was at least semi-lucid. And Voryn had pretty harshly told Nerevar he hates him and never wants to see him again. That he’ll kill Nerevar himself to finally be free of him. And post killing dagoth ur this still fucks Nerevar up

He’s not evil Nerevar he just has. Bad ptsd from everything along w insomnia and psychosis (I have psychosis and I like writing characters with it) and he’s convinced that while he was madly in love w Voryn and tried to use that love to convince him out of the fight in the heart chamber… Voryn never really loved him. They were only friends for convenience on Voryn’s end and Voryn probably began to hate and resent him early on in the friendship but had to stay close bc Nerevar was king and could pose a threat if he let his real feelings show so he’d rather act like he enjoyed Nerevar’s company and subtly manipulated him just to survive

So when he finds Voryn’s reincarnation injured and low it’s… it gives him many mixed feelings. He’s happy to see Voryn’s face again, and also believes Voryn wouldn’t want Nerevar anywhere near him reincarnation or not. He feels guilty enjoying his reincarnation’s smile and laughter and sweet voice. But he tells himself over and over that it’s just for his sake, he would send the reincarnation somewhere else if he could but Nerevar is the best person to protect him at the moment. It’s just temporary and he’ll let the reincarnation now somewhere outside of Morrowind where he’ll actually be safe. He kept his distance enough that it’s not a super painful goodbye on the reincarnation’s heart, but he does wonder why he feels so cold and empty leaving. Nerevar wishes him good luck and sets him off to Skyrim

Where dragonborn shenanigans happen and alduin is slain. And then the gang goes to Solstheim where cult shit (outside miraak’s) happens and oops. Dagoth ur and Voryn Dagoth are both trying to get in that body. It’s a chaotic mess. Most of the cultists are dealt with but Neloth calls in Nerevar

And Nerevar. Well. He’s not happy to hear it at all but he comes running and does know the solution. He and Divayth were working on making sure dagoth ur never returns—Azura prophecized his reincarnation after all, and Nerevar interpreted in the most dire way possible assuming she meant dagoth ur and not Voryn. (To Nerevar of course she wouldn’t bother just telling him about Voryn coming back because it’s not like it concerns him. Voryn would want nothing to do with him, and hated him arguably more than the tribunal did. So she must be warning dagoth ur would be coming back)

The mask ritual is what they came up with to banish dagoth ur. But divayth warns him since he hypothesizes Voryn’s soul is completely bound to dagoth ur, a reincarnation choosing to banish dagoth ur will banish Voryn’s personality, memories, etc with it. He’ll truly never see Voryn again and won’t even have the chance to talk to him abt what happened and apologize. Nerevar says that’s definitely for the best, because as much as he wants it he doesn’t want to hurt Voryn either.

He would have done it on the reincarnation at the temple to be safe but his reincarnation seemed so sweet and lovely, he couldn’t bear the thought. The ritual is likely going to be painful and miserable and he didn’t do anything to deserve it, he didn’t choose to be Voryn’s reincarnation.

But he assures team dragonborn this is their best bet and if they encourage him he’ll be able to fight it off. He doesn’t tell them about his close relationship with Voryn or even that any bits of Voryn in him will also be banished because he doesn’t. Really think it’s relevant their friend is suffering trying to fight it off himself. And he’s in a bad way fluctuating rapidly from classic dagoth ur insults, screaming, confused screaming, and begging for Nerevar to help him—team dragonborn initially confused on who Nerevar is.

And the ritual is a success! Only it didn’t banish Voryn but instead made all of it surface in his mind and he’s out cold processing it for several days. It all seems to have worked though and he can’t sense dagoth ur’s influence on him in the slightest. Makes sure to get him all set up with healers. Though he still tries to keep his distance despite team dragonborn being like “hhhhhey db seemed to know you and kept calling for you to help what was that” and Nerevar laughs it off that he knew the man dagoth ur used to be as they were political allies for a time and basically coworkers AND he helped the reincarnation when he was injured one time so it probably all bled together. Hey he and divayth are going to be the only two ppl alive now who know there’s more to it than that his reincarnation doesn’t need to know how much bad blood there really was between them more than absolutely necessary. He’ll probably already be upset about dagoth ur and everything he doesn’t need to feel guilty about what Voryn said (and Nerevar does believe Voryn was probably in the right on that one). He does spill though that Voryn’s personality and memories will be gone AFTER the ritual is finished, but he tries to do that to reassure them that almost everything should be back to normal and they can forget this all every happened really

But uhhhhh yeah. Dragonborn wakes up with Voryn’s memories crying and demanding to go to morrowind to speak with Nerevar. Team dragonborn reassured him that Nerevar is already here on Solsthiem bc neloth called for him to help with the whole tribunal cult and weird possession shit. Lucien probably is like “he said he and your previous incarnation—well before dagoth ur—was your coworker of sorts. But that not to worry, your won’t remember anything from that man either!”

And the dragonborn has to deadpan “a little late for that. I remember everything” or smth along those lines. Just feeling absolutely awful for what he said to Nerevar before Nerevar was forced to kill him. And then gets told “he said you were political allies and coworkers” and has to go “COWORKERS?! WE WERE CLOSR FRIENDS FOR CENTURIES. THE CLOSEST OF FRIENDS. I TOLD HIM ALMOST EVERYTHING WHAT DO YOU MEAN COWORKERS?!?!” Before it dawns on him that ohhhhhh god neht actually thought this ritual would banish all of Voryn’s memories too and he’d never remember Nerevar again. But was willing to give that up to truly free him from dagoth ur’s influence like he couldn’t do so long ago. He’d rather lose his closest friend and the man he loved for a THIRD time than risk Voryn losing himself again.