#this is such a small list for a fandom that has a lot of wonderful fanfic but I hope this is helpful!

[doobea]

I CAN MAKE YOUR BED ROCK - RIN ITOSHI

synopsis: You're a famous online smut author, married to an international superstar athlete, and everyone around you thinks you have the perfect sex life. What they don't realize is Rin sleeps in the guest room and you're still very much a virgin.

contents: fem!reader, arranged marriage, suggestive themes but nothing too explicit (read with caution), characters are all in their mid/late-20s, reader has a small supportive friend group of other smut authors, mentions of alcohol, sex toys, and lots of failed attempts to seduce an oblivious (?) husband, mdni word count: 2.4k a/n: you guys already know that this is gonna be a wild one. is this my debut attempt to write smut but make it a romcom? maybe. this is gonna be a four-part series!!

一 : Oh baby, I be stuck to you like glue ->next.

To say that you’re infamous on the internet isn’t an exaggeration but a truth. No, you haven’t posted anything controversial regarding your marital status and haven’t gotten yourself into a crazy D-List influencer scandal; you’re infamous solely because of your erotica literature and, surprisingly, your in-laws were fine with it.

“Whatever brings home the money.” Your father-in-law would always chime. 

You weren't ashamed of your career, and it practically all started in college when you wanted to pass the time writing for your favorite fandom. In a short amount of time, you had gained a small devoted following on your blog that made a lightbulb switch go off in your head - what if I could do this for a living? And so you did. Fast forward three years, now you are making a comfortable living working from anywhere with a wifi signal available and have over 950k followers on your socials, all under your alias 'YN Finalis'. With that many followers, most people would feel worried about their personal life being breached, but you're not dumb; you like to keep your personal life on, what you like to call, "low battery" mode.

Here's what your near million followers do know about: you’re 24 pushing on 25, you've come from a rather wealthy background, you’re married to an athlete, you’ve written well over 40 original explicit stories, and you have a plethora of sex toys and contraptions in your master bedroom.

What they don't know is: you're in an arranged marriage with Rin Itoshi for the past year, he only sleeps in the guest bedroom, and you're a virgin with a really creative mind.

Crazy, right?

But it's not like you're alone in your thoughts, today was the day when you decided to finally vent to your close fellow internet authors about your sexual frustrations.

"My in-laws keep asking me the same thing every time they call," Your voice reaches your laptop where your weekly meeting was set up on the kitchen counter. "I mean just how do they expect us to have a kid when my own husband doesn't even touch me?" You finish the remaining wine in your glass in dismay as sudden gasps were heard from the laptop's speakers.

"He hasn't initiated sex with you in these last few months?" Chigiri gasps.

"More like in the entirety of our relationship." You cry as you pour out another glass. You pick up your laptop, frowning seeing everyone's solemn looks, and make your way to your living room couch. "I'm still a virgin for crying out loud, like who's still a virgin at 24?"

Probably a lot of people but this is about you, not them!

"Oh my god," Hiori looks like he was going to cry for you. "Maybe your husband's just shy? Could it be he hasn't found the right time for it?"

"But a whole year?" Bachira is next to speak. "No wonder your stories have been popping off, you've been super horny."

You try to hold back your drunken sniffles. "I just don't understand! It's not like I'm ugly or anything, plenty of people wanted to date me back in college! He comes home to a clean house, I make fantastic meals that aren't just a ham and turkey sandwich, and for his past birthday I even gifted him an all-paid trip to Okinawa!"

"Shit," Shidou whistles, "I'd fuck you if you made me a ham and turkey sandwich."

"Not now for jokes." Hiori scolds and his tone softens when he speaks to you, "Outside of sex, has your husband been good to you?"

You pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration. "God, yes. He's so good to me you have no idea."

It wasn't like Rin was neglecting you in other forms of intimacy. Hugs and brief kisses were frequent both in and outside of the house. He loves holding your hands, shopping for clothes with you, giving you forehead kisses, and kissing you 'good morning' and 'good night' every day. There was absolutely nothing wrong with him, other than the occasional 'I'm irritated and I need my space' phase that required a whole evening to himself - but that was beside the point.

"Have you guys even talked about it?" Hiori continues.

"Oh god, absolutely no, it's an arranged marriage for fuck sake. What if I come off too strong and he doesn't even see me like that? Then the whole marriage will just be awkward!"

"But he's willing to do all those other things you listed down, maybe he is just shy." Bachira retorts.

"You think maybe he swings the other way?" Shidou asks but it's genuine this time.

A long period of silence falls over everyone as they try to figure out what they could help you with. But ultimately this was your husband to figure out, Rin wasn't married to them and they don't even know who Rin Itoshi was.

“Ah, whatever!” You swirl the wine in your glass around, frowning at your sullen reflection. “Maybe we’ll just end up adopting a baby instead of having one, maybe his parents won’t be able to tell the difference. And maybe I’ll just have to resort to reading other smut to satisfy my lack of intimacy. Chigiri, when is that next chapter coming out?”

A few clicks are heard from the other side of the screen before he says, “You’re in luck, I’m about to have my friend beta read this and it should be up by tonight.”

Perfect, you thought.

Chigiri, whose online username is RedPanther, has the third most followers on the adult website that everyone in the group was a part of. He's known for his works centering around the tropes 'forced proximity' and 'enemies to lovers', often the smut he writes will include a steamy threesome that has some sort of pegging involved - but that's always towards the second to last chapter.

"Oh!" Bachira calls out your name with a smile, "Aren't you working on a new story yourself?"

“Remind me again,” Shidou leans forward, "what's this one about?"

You find yourself feeling slightly lighter now that you've vented and the topic has shifted to something you're more confident speaking about. After a few seconds of rummaging through your Word documents, you drag the file labeled "I CAN MAKE YOUR BED ROCK - rough outlines & ideas.doc" to the group chat. Rarely do you ever share your creativity flow with other people but, after your unwarranted trauma dump, you figure it was better than nothing.

"Funny enough, it's loosely based on my marriage." You confess sheepishly, "This is my way of coping with it, I guess."

"Nothing wrong with that." Hiori chimes in, "It's free compared to having a shitty therapist!"

"Damn woman," Shidou's pink eyes dart back and forth from the screen, eyebrows furrowing up and down as he makes his way through your well-detailed outline. "you need to get laid, ASAP."

You click open your story file to follow along. In the tags section, you listed: Arranged marriage, unrequited love/one-sided, brat tamer, BDSM, choking, spanking, spitting, breeding kink, cum slu–

Okay, maybe Shidou is right (which is a surprise), you do need to get laid. But it's also okay to get slightly defensive for the sake of your ego, right?

You playfully roll your eyes at your group mate. "Ok ok, no need to judge that hard coming from the person who literally writes degradation kinks for a living!"

"Well, I think this story will be your best one yet!" Chigiri and Bachira both flip you a thumbs up over on their end of the call.

After a few more exchanges of small story updates in everyone's life, you all decided to end the call since it was getting rather late in the afternoon and you have yet to get started on dinner. You briefly thank Chigiri for his upcoming update and hop off, just in time before you hear the familiar sounds of the front door opening.

"I'm back."

"Welcome back, Rin!"

You can't help but feel slightly embarrassed and guilty that you were essentially gossiping about your husband's lack of sex drive to your friend group, which he hardly knows about, when he comes home with a large bag of takeout and your favorite coffee order. Rin is dressed in his typical workout outfit, which consists of a black form-fitting t-shirt and grey sweatpants that were just loose enough that you can still make an outline of his 'magic jewels', as Bachira likes to write.

"Baby, you didn't have to." You quickly grab the items from his hands so he can set down his gym bag.

He hums in response, briefly kissing your forehead before making his way into the kitchen to fetch a tall glass of water. "You've been cooking all week so I wanted you to take a small break," Rin says with a smile.

Your ears go warm and mimic the smile back, “Thanks, how was practice today?”

He sighs through his nose and wipes away the remaining sweat-covered bangs sticking to his forehead. “Rougher than usual but nothing too crazy. Isagi was more annoying compared to yesterday.” Rin says with a small pout.

“Boo,” You stick your tongue out in agreement, “how dare he annoys my one and only husband?”

“Oh, shut up.” He flicks a finger to your cheek and lets out the slightest fake scoff.

After hydrating, Rin announces quietly that he’ll come back to eat as soon as he takes a shower and darts to the guest bedroom. And with that, you’re reminded of your odd predicament.

He is a good husband and knows that you care for him and vice versa. When both sets of parents first introduced you two, it was awkward and you knew from reading his background that he wasn’t the most sociable of people but you were, and still are, patient. This arranged marriage was more or less a business deal between fathers; your father held the CEO title at a top entertainment company in the nation and Rin’s father wanted to secure the spotlight for the growing star athlete. Rin didn’t say much during that meeting, and neither did you.

Your first kiss with him was also on your first date. It was at his apartment, both of you shared the same hobby of playing horror games, and you were sitting thigh to thigh on his two-seater couch. You were dying multiple rounds in, fingers bruised from button-mashing and mind-busied with inappropriate thoughts as you kept stealing glances at your painfully attractive fiance. It didn’t take long for Rin to notice because it was stupidly obvious. He sat his controller down, took one look at you, and asked, “Do you want me to kiss you?” with a weird little smile that was seemingly almost out of character from what you knew of him. And the kiss was … awkward to say the least. You remembered him leaning down and you were leaning up, mashing lips and a little bit of teeth together. No amount of research that you had done days prior could’ve prepped for that. And it was almost as if it was his first time kissing too, but you fixated on your inexperience than pay any mind to his mysterious relationship track record. 

One year later and you’re still stuck at first base.

As if on cue, you feel your phone give out a series of buzzes in your back pocket, already knowing that it’s from your online penpals. You break out from your thoughts and scroll to the top of the messages:

Bachira M. [BluntBangs] “You should try seducing him tonight!” Hiori Y. [ChoppyCyan] “You remember reading Chigiri’s fan favorite short story - “Till Death Do Us Part”? There was this one scene where the characters had to share one bed because the other bedroom got ruined by a leak! Maybe you can “accidentally” make that happen too?” Chigiri H. [RedPanther] “I remember I had a fun time writing that scene. You should definitely try and flirt with him, y/n.” Shidou R. [HornyDemon] “And if your husband won’t fuck you then I will /jk” Hiori Y. [ChoppyCyan] “Shut up you’ll fuck anything that has a pulse”

They weren’t necessarily wrong. You didn’t want this dynamic to potentially go on for another year or even for the rest of your life - trying wouldn’t hurt anyone, right? 

You quickly fill up a pitcher of water then peer into the spare guest room and notice warm lighting bleeding through the cracks coming from the bathroom door and the sounds of running water. With Rin still busy washing up, you take the liberty to start messing around for your impromptu operation. You weren’t exactly sure when or who suggested sleeping in separate bedrooms to start but, to your knowledge, this is the first time that you’ve actually sneaked around in his room.

You start with the closet, opening its double doors and seeing his clothes all hung in order and by color. His sneakers and cleats were all stored in separate clear cases in the bottom corner while there is a small center shelf in the middle that holds his cologne, deodorant, and moisturizer. He’s neat, you think to yourself before deciding that it’s probably best to leave his belongings alone and focus on ruining something in the room that was less personal. Next is the carefully made bed with extra fluffed pillows, then the freshly well-kept plants on the window sill, followed by the small framed photo of your wedding day on the bedside table. Guilt immediately rushes over your consciousness.

“No, this won’t do either.” You groan, suddenly feeling like this is the dumbest thing on earth now. “I should just give up.” 

“y/n?” Rin’s voice calls out and you snap your head towards his direction, soon to be met with a series of incoherent sputtering from the male as you realize that he’s completely wet and naked.

“Oh my god!” Hands and pitcher fly to your redden face as you try to come up with an excuse but nothing comes out the way you want it to, “I-I uh–water! I thought you needed more water–I’m sorry!”

You hear him scrambling around the room, most likely searching for a towel to cover up his impressive lower half. “You’re fine,” Rin’s voice sounds flustered and unusually high pitched, “just give me a second–”

“N-No I’m sorry! I don’t even know why I’m standing here I should just go and–” Closing your eyes might’ve been the worst choice all day because soon your body meets the wall and soon the floor, spilling the pitcher’s contents all over you in the process. 

Your phone vibrates again, text reading:

Bachira M. [BluntBangs] “Did it work?!”

[madschiavelique]

Okay but picture this, Miguel getting jealous cause of another spiderperson flirting with you

Like he is doing a briefing with a lot of spider people and one of them keeps trying to get your attention and miguel gets jealous, sends everyone away and has a heavily make out on his platform in his office🫣

HIHIHI twirling hair kicking feet at this bestie

summary : miguel gets jealous of a random spiderperson flirting with you (not proofread)

content warnings : posessive!miguel, just jealous miguel, no use of Y/N, fem!reader word count : 1,9k

tag list : @fandom-ash

Miguel had invited a good group of spiderpersons who were still fairly new to the society, to bring them up to speed or simply to remind them of the procedures to follow on a mission.

You were there, just to supervise. Having been part of Miguel's elite group of spiders for some time now, you were perfectly familiar with all the criteria and stages of the anomaly hunt.

Nothing more than a quick briefing. The usual team was there, Hobie, Gwen, Pavitr, Peter B, Jess and you. You stood off to the side, leaning against a wall, arms folded as you watched Miguel give his speech a bit farther away.

"Hey, I've never seen you around before, do we know each other ?

Your eyes went to the person who had just spoken to you. It was an umpteenth Peter, blond-haired, not far from your age, and of course new.

Although you didn't appear everywhere all the time, most of the spiders knew what Miguel's group looked like. So you were a little surprised by his remark, but not enough for it to be too striking.

"You might've seen me on his team," you said, pointing with your chin at your boyfriend, who you hoped wasn't terrorising the newcomers too much.

You tried to refocus on Miguel's speech. Your relationship with him was not public; you had agreed that, for the time being, you would prefer to keep it a secret. There were several reasons for this, such as the fact that you might be seen as a spider with more privileges than the others - which wasn't the case - or the fact that you simply wanted to avoid trouble. This lack of information didn't stop Peter from coming back for a chat.

"So... what's your name ?"

You didn't even look at him, simply giving him your name and alias.

"And you're a new Peter," you sighed.

"You never get enough Peters, am I right?" he smiled, "although I'm obviously unique in my own way.

"Unique?" you smiled with a little chuckle, "how?", because Peters looked and acted the same, they were after all Peters, so you wondered how he would stand out.

"Like this," he approached you, tucking his fingers behind your ear and bringing his hand into your field of vision so that you could see a little flower between his fingers.

You gave a little laugh, taking the flower in your hand. It was soft, light and smelled wonderful.

"A Peter magician?" you pouted, shaking your head, "that's progress."

Miguel was going over the formalities of multidimensional cells when his gaze inevitably drifted to you. But he froze, tensing up as his eyes took in the little scene unfolding nearby.

You, against a wall, an ordinary Peter caressing your ear to perform a crummy magic trick and make a flower come out of it. Too close... he thought, he was too close to you. He didn't appreciate the proximity with which he approached you. Of course, the other team-mates in his squad could allow themselves to be close to you, whether you were in their arms or whatever, but for one of the countless Peters here to allow himself to be at your level? That he could not condone.

He saw a small smile forming on your face, his blood boiling. Wasn't he good enough for you? Was it because he didn't give you enough affection that you let any spider approach you? Or was it that he didn't do you enough favours, like performing magic tricks?

But Miguel was so good to you, it was almost impossible to get out of his arms when he hugged you. He gave you everything he could give you, even loving you to the point of giving you the last empanada left in the cafeteria if there was only one left, no matter how much he wanted it, and that's how passionate he was about you.

So maybe... you didn't realise that Peter was flirting with you?

Ah, maybe that was it, maybe you were just oblivious to what the nerd was trying to do?

And the Peter took another step.

That one step was too much.

"Well, you've got most of the information. We're going to cut this meeting short, you can all go." he warned, teeth clenched.

The elite team itself looked surprised as all the other Spiderpersons scattered to leave the room.

"Miguel? Is there something wrong ?" asked Peter B, concerned that perhaps the reason everyone had just been dismissed was because of something he had received from Lyla that was important.

But his eyes were riveted like arrows ready to be shot at the Peter who was still chatting to you.

"I just have to take care of a little problem," his eyebrows were furrowed, jaw tight.

Peter B's eyes drifted back to where his were, letting out a quiet "Oh" before calling the rest of the team and persuading them to come with him to... whatever it was for, as long as the elite were leaving too.

"And so you caught three anomalies in a single mission?" said Peter, absolutely amazed by the feats you were telling him about.

"Yes, it's becoming routine," you confirmed.

You noticed the room beginning to empty, and deduced that the meeting must have ended.

"I'm so happy that there are Spiderwomen around, and as competent as you are," continued Peter, chatting to you, "especially when I see that they're as beautiful as you are."

"That's very kind of you," you say simply, "the meeting's just finished, I think you'd better leave before you get your knuckles rapped."

Advice from someone with a very strict boyfriend on organisation, you thought.

"Could we meet again? How about the cafeteria?" he offered.

"That's very nice of you to suggest, but-" you bit the inside of your cheek as he cut you off.

"Oh, or maybe the park? I hear there's an ice-cream parlour that sells ice-creams in our likeness." he laughed softly.

"Would you look at that."

You swallow, his voice was strained and falsely interested, your eyes landing on Miguel who'd just arrived near you.

It's almost comical how tall Miguel was compared to him, towering over him in both mass and size to the point where he could crush him like a tin can.

"Oh Miguel O'Hara-" greeted Peter as if nothing had happened.

"I've never seen you here before," Miguel remarked, a vicious flash in his eyes.

He intended to take great pleasure in showing how much better he was than Peter, and above all in making sure he understood that you weren't interested in his advances.

"Oh yes sir, I'm Peter," he said.

"How original," said Miguel in a honeyed, falsely curious tone, glancing at you.

"The Peters must be the best for there to be so many of them," laughed Peter, and you felt like pinching the bridge of your nose.

"I see them more as a weed that hangs around," he said, looking into poor Peter's eyes, Miguel looming over him.

"Well, I think you should join the other Spiderpersons," you simply breathed with a polite smile.

"Yeah um," he swallowed, lowering his eyes from Miguel's to meet yours, he was appalled. "I'll see you sometime maybe ?"

"Never," Miguel decided.

Peter took a few steps backwards, unable to say anything else, and headed for the exit.

"You look upset, what's wrong?" you asked as Miguel headed for the control platform.

"I see you made a new friend?" asked Miguel, his eyes locking onto you with a dark gleam as he stepped onto the platform.

"Not really," you replied, your voice a little smaller as you in turn joined him on it, coming to sit on one of the desks.

"What did he want?" he asked, his tone insistent as he looked at you, standing and taking a step forward.

"Nothing special, he wanted to get acquainted," you said softly as he took a step forward, his eyes gleaming strangely.

"Just getting to know each other?" he said, arriving just in front of you and placing his two hands on either side of your thighs, tilting his head to the side, questioningly. "You're naive if you think he just wants to be your friend."

His face was close to yours, his whole body almost covering you, leaving you unable to move or get away. Your eyes locked with his a little more, and you understood, a small smile forming on your lips.

You put your hand on his cheek, and he pressed against your touch.

"Do I detect some jealousy there?"

He sighed, his jaw contracting slightly, his tongue creating a tent in his cheek. You raised an eyebrow - was Miguel jealous?

His hand came to brush against your thigh, his fingers moving up until they settled and gripped you, pulling you towards him with this simple grip until your noses touched.

"I didn't like very much how he was so close to you," he admitted, his lips brushing yours.

He came to kiss you, demanding, his lips pressing almost brutally against yours as his other hand came to rest on the small of your back, the latter pressing to bring you closer to him.

You tried to respond to his kiss, his lips and jaw so strong that you felt he was going to engulf you.

He came and kissed your neck, a small sigh of comfort coming from between your lips, which were puffed out and moistened by his kiss.

"You know," you said softly as your fingers ran through his hair, "he never stood a chance against... you right ?"

The statement made his ego swell, as if a huge weight had just been lifted from his shoulders and he felt so light. His lips tenderly kissed your neck, and you felt it.

He sucked at your skin, marking it delicately. He needed, needed the others to know that you had someone. And although you both wanted what you had to be private, he had a terrible desire for people to know that you belonged to him, and not just anyone. He came back to your lips.

"Say that you're mine."

He had to hear it, from your lips that were full of him. You moistened them with a flick of your tongue, his eyes attentive, dark.

"I'm yours," you affirmed softly.

He came to kiss you again, pulling away from your lips to let his fall on your cheek.

"Make me believe it," he said, drunk on your skin. "Say that again."

His kisses covered your skin, wanting to coat it entirely with his lips so that he didn't miss any part of it.

"I'm yours," you whispered, drowning in his adoration as your fingers caressed his cheek.

"Again," he whispered as his lips kissed your eyelid.

"I'm yours," you whispered, your other hand coming around his chest to bring him closer to you.

"Again..." his voice was barely audible, kissing the tip of your nose.

Of course you were his, everything already belonged to him. Did he want your heart? It was full of him. Did he want your thoughts? He had replaced every one of your ideas. Did he want all of you? He would only have a body and a soul that was already attached to him.

When his lips returned to yours, it was you who kissed him, and he melted under the sensation of your lips on his.

"I'm yours."

Your eyes gazed at each other, each living in the other, and he wrapped his arms around you, pressing you hard against him, closing his eyes to enjoy the moment.

He wouldn't let any weeds near his flower.

[somerandomdudelmao]

It's Cass appreciation time!!! Don't get me wrong, I think we all appreciate you exactly all the time, but I wanted to write it out because I'm filled with SO MUCH LOVE RIGHT NOW THAT I PHYSICALLY CAN'T CONTAIN IT.

So!

First and foremost, I think you're a wonderful person. I may not know you personally, but the way in which you go about things - not just in your comic, but the way you interact with people - just leaves me in awe. You're so gentle but in the most chaotic way possible, and it makes me so happy to be alive. You're supportive of people and the things they create, while also just... spreading the joys of not just the fandom, but so many other things too. You're one of the people on here that unites the fandom as a whole, and it's so inspiring! You bring so much love here, and I admire that about you.

Another thing that I admire is that you know what your limits are and that you take care of yourself. I see so many people these days who don't - some who just forget, some who don't realize they're doing it, and others who blatantly refuse to do so - and it's frustrating to see. I want to help them (aka: wrap them in a blanket burrito to protect them from the world, offer coping skills, give them the support they need- the list goes on), but I can't really do much of that without burning myself out. Which is why I love to see you take care of yourself - whenever I see those asks that are like "reminder to drink water / rest / take a break", it reminds me that I need to do it too, and I'm positive that it reminds others as well. That, and it's refreshing to see!

I also love how creative and spontaneous you are! The plots you come up with, as well as the characterization and overall flow of the story - not to mention the PERFECT amount of fluff and angst you give us (WITH THE PROMISE OF A HAPPY ENDING??? OH MY GOD)- leaves me floored every time! I don't know a whole lot about writing and portraying things, but I've learned a bunch just by what you do. LETS ALSO REMEMBER ALL THE SMALL DETAILS YOU PUT INTO THIS - THE PARALLELS, THE LITTLE SHOWS OF AFFECTION,AND JUST- EVERYTHING??? GHDBDKDBSJ

AHH!

You inspire me to create, and whenever I have the confidence to post what I'm working on, I'll be sure to tag you (bc all of it is related to your comic)!

I have so much to say, but not nearly enough words to fully express it! But this is also getting much longer than I thought it would, and as much as I want to sing you praises all day, there's not enough time. So to wrap this up:

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all that you do. I'm sure it's not easy - you're a whole person outside of this, and everyone has bad days - so, again, thank you. I may not know you personally, but I still care a great deal about you. Please keep taking care of yourself! Drink some water, have a snack, take a nap, make some time for yourself - whatever it is, have a fantastic time hon. You deserve it.

Keep being amazing, and I wish you the best!

Until next time, dearie ^-^

Oh god I don't even know what to say jcdtujdsukcdhb thank you yhank you thank you so much you just brightened my day I

[sleepingdeath-light]

affectionate male s/o hcs ; angel dust

requested by ; 💍 anon (14/02/24)

fandom(s) ; hazbin hotel

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; angel dust

outline ; “hey, I just saw an update from your blog and was wondering if I could make a request ?!

Angel dust With a male reader boyfriend who is always by his side, and the two of them are always lovey dovey.

You and I definitely know the trauma that Angel Dust has experienced all this time, and I want Angel Dust to be able to share his trauma with his boyfriend so it's not just him.

Thanks in advance 🫂

💍-anon”

note ; this might be a bit shaky in terms of his characterisation because i haven’t written for angel dust in a while, but hopefully it isn’t too noticeable

warning(s) ; references to angel’s canon traumas, but mostly fluff!

you are, to put it bluntly, the only real bright spot in the dark spiral of pain, abuse, and addiction that has defined the vast majority of angel’s life in hell — and that makes him all the more intensely protective over you

he never breathes so much as a word of your relationship around val or his colleagues and refuses to let you go anywhere near the areas of hell dominated by the vees — and up until a few weeks before the battle with adam, he refused to meet up with you at the hotel and would insist on meeting at another neutral location because he was just so damn scared of you two being seen together and somebody (be that his boss, some weird stalker fan, or someone else) deciding to use you to further hurt him

(or even just to hurt you for the sake of it — you are in hell, after all, and the people he’s associated with over the decades aren’t exactly the nicest lot)

all of that being said, when the two of you are together and around the small group of people that angel trusts, he’s more than happy to show off his ‘cute’ little boyfriend and smother you in as much affection as you give him (and even more when he’s in the mood for it)

he’s forever touching you when you’re together: holding one of your hands in his own, wrapping an arm around your waist and tugging you against his side, hugging you from behind and resting his head atop yours when you’re talking to someone, nuzzling his face against your cheek or the crook of your neck, playing with your fur/fluff/hair/wings/tail when you’re sat side by side at the bar, interlocking elbows when you’re walking together, kissing you on the cheek/nose/temple whenever he feels like it, laying down with his face buried in your chest/stomach after a long day (or letting you bury your face in his fluff if you’ve had a rough go of it), and even just outright picking you up and carrying you around whenever he’s bored and wants to go hangout in his room with just you and fat nuggets

and, of course, there are a few acts that you can do that never fail to make his day that bit brighter — namely running your hands through his hair when he’s laying on your lap/stomach/chest, and reaching out to grab one of his hands and stroke reassuring circles onto the back of it whenever he seems nervous for whatever reason

(really any genuine display of innocent affection makes his heart melt, but it’s those two that have the best chance of making his performative mask drop and having a real smile slip through onto his face)

truly the list of affectionate displays, both public and private, is endless and angel dust can’t get enough — you’re the one that introduced him to this whole ‘innocent touching between boyfriends’ thing, sure, but around nine times out of ten he’s the one that initiates it because he just can’t help but want to be close to you all of the time

he gets incredibly pouty and jealous whenever you show affection to other people, even though he’s fully aware that that’s just who you are and it doesn’t mean anything to you — this can be very easily remedied by spoiling him with love, affection, and gifts when you realise what’s happened, but in the moment in can get a tad awkward because of how over the top flirtatious and possessive angel’s language and behaviour gets (like by the time you’ve caught on and dragged him away to talk it over, the other party is left with less than no doubt about the fact that you’re very happily taken and your boyfriend does not like to share)

having someone waiting for him to get home, the promise of affection without expectation and an evening of proper actual aftercare, is what keeps him from spiralling as badly as he used to — you give him that extra bit of motivation that he needs to stay on the straight and narrow (or as close as he can given his contract) and not fall back on those bad habits again

because he doesn’t need to ruin himself or drown his emotions in sex and drink and drugs or any of the other shit he used to do when he has you — because he wants to be someone you’re proud of, that you’re proud to be with, and that you can rely on for comfort and support as much as he can rely on you for those things

he wants to be the best person he can be for you and, in the process, he starts to believe more and more in the whole ‘hazbin hotel’ project that charlie started

you and cherry are the only ones that really get to see the real angel dust on a consistent basis — and you’re the only one who gets to know, and address him by, his real name when you’re alone because he trusts you so much and because it feels much more intimate and ‘real’ to be called that by his boyfriend rather than the stage name that everyone knows him by

because the two of you are basically attached at the hip when you’re together, angel ends up missing you very intensely when you’re apart for whatever reason — this means that he’s texting you whenever he gets a spare moment to do so throughout the day (he gets very good at hiding his phone at the studio as a result of this habit because, no matter how much he may try, he just can’t resist sending you a quick text or selfie between shoots)

he and cherry are out at the bar having some fun? he’s texting you between shots telling you about how much you’d love this place and how you should totally go there for your next date

charlie and vaggie are being all lovey-dovey in the hotel lobey? he’s sending you a picture with a super cheesy caption about how that should be you but since you were too busy you’re gonna have to miss out

he’s been given a super cute outfit to wear for a movie or his makeup looks especially good? he’s texting you a selfie in his changing room and making a million excuses to his boss just so he can see the compliment you send him before he has to lock and hide away his phone so he can go back to the shoot

you had to leave early and he has the day off? he’s sending you a sad selfie of him and fat nuggets talking about how much they both miss you and insisting you hurry up and either finish your errands quickly or skive off of work to come back to bed

and the list goes on… he’s really clingy but you can’t say you mind given your affectionate inclination

[dduane]

Hello! I was wondering if you’ve shared your ao3 account? Like, have you acknowledged “this account is mine,” or do you keep it personal? Totally respect if you keep it under wraps I just wanted to know if I’m missing something. Hope my wording of this makes sense!

No, it's OK, I get it. You're asking "Have you publicly ID'd a given AO3 account as yours?"

No, and I'm not going to. Because it contains fanfic I've written for pleasure—exactly as I started writing it in my teens—and I have no desire to have that publicly connected with me.

Leaving the usual legal concerns aside (and not being even slightly concerned that a judge would fail to find the fiction "transformational", if the truth came out in a court of law) a significant part of this effort is about answering the question: "What would happen if people read fiction of mine and they didn't know Diane Duane was responsible for it? What would their reaction be?" That urge to discover whether the fiction stands on its own, without the inevitable shadow cast by one’s reputational backstop, still comes up for me in some moods. So when the itch to write fanfic comes up, I scratch it. And all I can say is that, by and large, the results have been satisfying.

Frankly, it's a ton of fun. There's no one to satisfy (at the most immediate level) except me and the local embodiment of the Creative Urge. No one will ever accuse me of "just churning [this] out for more $$$$", because there is no $$$$. And there's room to stretch further and harder than I might normally do in my public work (because there's more forgiveness for failure: and in the arts, I think, failure is absolutely one of the most effective ways to grow). Whatever comes back to me in return for this work—and it is work, some of the hardest I've ever done—is in the form of raw appreciation. So, people, on behalf of my colleagues, let me just say: comment on AO3 fics, yeah? You don't have to be fulsome about it. A word or two will do. And bestow kudos where you may. It's all an AO3 fanfic writer asks.

...And of course some people will say: "Are you off your rocker? You're traditionally published for decades, you have awards, you've been on bestseller lists, how can you not be sure that what you're doing's any good?" ...But you know, no writer is sure all the time. All of us wake up in the middle of the night some time(s), thinking "I'm not sure I've still got it..." and squeezing our eyes shut in terror of future reviews containing the horrible conjecture that Maybe We Never Really Had It To Start With. When you've spent a significant portion of your lifetime making stuff (up) out of nothing, the horrible suspicion that maybe it really has been nothing all the time—I mean, nothing nothing—is unavoidable.

So sometimes some of us want to go out in disguise (and I don't mean paid pseudonymic work: that proves nothing in this particular arena) and see how we fare. I know other traditionally-published writers who've done this—names that would surprise you—and who, by and large, have done it for the same reasons. We are the dark figures, hooded and cloaked, sitting in the shadows of some of the more prominent fandoms that express themselves on AO3; eyes glinting in the firelight, enjoying the reactions to the stories we've got to tell.

It's not bad here, in the shadows. For one thing, you're in a better position to appreciate the figures moving in the light. There's a lot of extraordinary talent on AO3 (and elsewhere in the online fanfic world), sharing stuff with us out of their own hard work and from their own urge toward grace. It's a privilege to read them. (Some of them are better writers than I am. I appreciate them: and comment, and leave kudos, because that's how appreciation is concretely shown. And I take notes.)

Beyond that, there's nothing much to add except that I have no plans to stop. And also: that I think kindly every single day of the very small and exclusive group of people who know "who" I am on AO3, and have kindly kept that data to themselves. Your confidence honors me, friends. May the Work do you honor in return. :)

And now: I owe you all an update, so you'll have to excuse me while I get on with it. :)

[shall-we-die]

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{Quirk}

Random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship?

╞•⊰❖⊱•═══•༻🪧༺•═══•⊰❖⊱•╡

↬[Fandom]•⊰ {Obey me!}࿐

↬[Warnings]•⊰ {None}࿐

☰[Main list]•⊰ ────┈┈{0036}┈─╮

╭──────┈┈┈┈┈───────╯

╰┈➤Likes/Reblogs are appreciated࿐

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↬|Lucifer|

One of Lucifer's random abilities that is beneficial in a relationship is his cooking skills. Lucifer is an excellent cook and enjoys cooking delicious meals for his beloved to enjoy. Cooking for his partner is not only a sign of his love and affection, but also a way for him to unwind and spend quality time with them. His partner appreciates his culinary talents and loves indulging in the delicious meals he prepares. Lucifer's cooking skills are one of the ways he demonstrates his love for his partner and they cherish the time spent together in the kitchen.

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↬|Mammon|

Despite his many faults, Mammon actually has a hidden skill that can be quite beneficial in a relationship. Since he loves to spend time with his significant other, he knows all their favorite things, and he likes to put a lot of thought and effort into planning surprise date nights or romantic trips. He could also be a great partner to watch scary movies with (We all know he's scared, but this is the best way to be with MC), as he would cling to MC and make sure they are safe at all times. And, when it comes to expressing his feelings, he might even surprise them with a sweet and heartfelt gesture, letting them know just how much he loves and cherishes them.

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↬|Leviathan|

When in a relationship, Leviathan possesses the ability to perfectly match his partner's mood. He has an intuitive sense of when they need comfort, when they need space, and when they need reassurance. He never invalidates his partner's feelings and always makes an effort to understand them, even when he doesn't fully comprehend their point of view. His empathy and understanding make him the perfect partner, always putting his significant other's needs before his own.

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↬|Satan|

When MC is cold, Satan can warm them up with his fire. As demons, they can stay awake all night long together and never run out of things to do. MC may find the horns comforting to lay against when they want to cuddle. Satan has a soft spot for all kitties MC and may spoil the cat with all the treats they want. Despite Satan's dark exterior, he is actually quite sensitive and considerate of MC's feelings. Satan loves to make MC laugh by telling jokes (maybe a little too dark, but who can resist them?) (Actually, I really enjoy dark humor)

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↬|Asmodeus|

Asmodeus is known for his beautiful vocals which is why it's no surprise that he's quite a good singer! If MC is stressed or sad, he can serenade them as a way of comforting them and showing his love. A song can do wonders in lifting one's spirit. With his singing, Asmodeus can give MC a chance to relax and escape reality for a moment. After he's done singing, he'll wrap his arms around MC, giving them a light kiss on their cheek.

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↬|Beelzebub|

Beelzebub is a very attentive and thoughtful partner. He is always aware of the MC's mood, their likes and dislikes, and their needs. He will surprise them with thoughtful gestures, such as cooking their favorite meal or buying them a small but meaningful gift. Beelzebub also enjoys being tactile and affectionate with the MC, and he shows his love through touch and kisses. Overall, Beelzebub is a great partner and always tries to make the MC feel safe, loved, and appreciated.

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↬|Belphegor|

Belphegor is a great listener and loves when MC vents and shares stories with them. Belphegor is a huge snuggle bug and loves making MC feel comfortable and cozy. Belphegor is very loyal and protective of MC, always having their back no matter what.

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↬|Diavolo|

Diavolo has an excellent memory and remembers every single detail of his time with the MC, both big and small, and will often surprise them by referencing things they did or said in the past, which shows how much he was paying attention and how much he values their time together. Diavolo has the ability to sense the MC's need for affection and attention from miles away, like a sixth sense, and no matter what he is doing, he will rush to the MC's side when they need him. Diavolo has a knack for writing emotional, meaningful letters, poems, and love notes for the MC.

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↬|Barbatos|

Barbatos knows how to make every single dish that the s/o may want, and he knows how to mix certain drinks into certain flavors. As the head butler of the Lord, it's essential for Barbatos to know everything that's beneficial to the s/o's physical and mental well-being. He'd surprise and shower the s/o with their favorite dish or drink whenever he can be of service. This is to cheer up the s/o whenever they feel down and to make them smile and laugh again.

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↬|Simeon|

Simeon has a special ability to soothe, relax, and calm his partner with his gentle, soothing voice and calming presence. This makes him a great listener when you need to vent or just talk about your worries and stresses. Simeon is also very attentive and observant and notices lots of little things about you, such as when you're not feeling well or feeling down. He is always quick to come to your aid, whether it's by getting you your favorite snacks and hot drinks, or by offering a listening ear and words of comfort.

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↬|Solomon|

Solomon has the ability to be a wonderful listener. He can fully devote himself to listening to his partner and understanding their feelings and thoughts. He is able to ask meaningful questions and offer meaningful responses, allowing him to truly understand and connect with his partner. This is a highly beneficial ability in a relationship, as it allows both partners to come together and feel closer and more intimate. It also helps to resolve conflicts and build trust between the two people in the relationship, as it shows them that they are being heard and that their feelings are being taken seriously.

||[🅀uirk]||

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     ⇆ㅤㅤ◁🄿ㅤㅤ❚❚ㅤㅤ🅁▷ㅤㅤ↻

[burntblueberrywaffles]

Is this true that anidala fandom is relatively small and although there are theoretically many fics about them, in most of them they are only the background ship? Idk I just heard this opinion somewhere and wonder if it's legitimate cause I'm thinking of getting into anidala more and maybe writing some fic

Unfortunately that is accurate 😔 trying to find Anidala centered fanfics is hellish for that reason; while the tag seems to have many fics, you have to sift through a ridiculous amount of non-Anidala centric fics to find anything to read 😭 - my filtering game has gotten insane I have like 30 excluded tags going on when I venture in

That’s the reason I took the time to make two different Anidala fanfic rec lists - (here’s the first one and the second one!)

From my experience on the tumblr side, we’re certainly a smaller fandom; I think while a lot of people might like Anidala, with it being 2 decades old, there’s only a few of us who are passionate enough about them to still actively make posts in the year of our lord 2024 LOL - that said I really don’t want to discourage anyone from joining the fandom, there’s definitely a significant backlog of content for them! 🥰

If you end up writing some Anidala, feel free to let me know! While I’m currently in the Snowbaird hole, Anidala is one of those ships that I always come back to and I’d love to see more fics for them ❤️❤️

[married-to-google-translater]

Can you tell us your top 5 husbandos?

Yeah sure. My list rarely changes, but now something has changed.

Kanato Sakamaki #5

Ummmm….

guys I really don't know how to say this….

But Kanato is kind of relatable.

Before you ask yes I'm mentally fine and no I don't need professional help lol. (If you don't know what this means, good luck reading the fanwiki.)

So I am an autistic person. And Kanato has small traits that make him relatable. His obsession with certain things, aversion to places with a lot of people, the assumption that everyone assumes the worst about you and difficulty dealing with changes.

These traits are not true for all autistic people, but they are true for me. So that's why I find Kanato relatable. And that's also the reason why he attracts me like a magnet.

And that's why he's so high on this list.

+ Hes kinda canon yandere lol. I love write for those.

Malleus Draconia #4

Malleus Malleus Malleus Definitely one of my favorite characters from twst. Maybe also a bit in the canon yandere category.

I really like the Malleus character desing and backstory. It hits me. He is also a character that is really nice to write.

And every night I cry because the Malleus figure was the only one that never went on sale in the country where I live :(

Leviathan #3

Definitely my second favorite character. Originally the reason why I got to know Otaku culture. I really like the way the character is made.

I also apparently have a thing for characters with tails. I have no idea where it comes from.

But Leviathan is also really relatable and moody.

JUST LOVING HIM <3

Douma #2

Same thing that with Kanato. I'm fine and I don't need professional help XD

Not even I find Douma relatable lol

Listen, everyone has their own character through which they got to know the fandom, and for me, Douma is that character.

I really REALLY REALLY like how he's done. His backstory is good as is his desing and pasta god bless the person who handled his Japanese dubbing.

This just works. Hits just the right spot and I can't wait for us to get more screen time for him.

Azusa Mukami #1

I have been an Azusa simp since 2018. This man was perfection in my opinion at the time and I have had no reason to change my opinion over the years.

I LOVE this man. Everything is perfect. EVERYTHING.

The dubbing of the character is perfect, I like his backstory and his appearance.

And I am one of those people who have read game translations. In them, if you make your choice correctly, Azusa is a wonderful cinnamon roll… Aaaaaaah

I just love him... And its pity we no have Azusa merch ;(

Plz send me Azusa requests...

[aerkame]

Adding another fandom to writings

I am considering on adding Welcome Home to my list of fandoms that I will write for (Currently Transformers & Trollhunters right now). I'm just more concerned about the asks I might get. BUT, I have writing rules so there's that. I do have my own headcanons on Welcome Home based on theories I have on it, it's more horror centered though since Welcome Home comes off as 4th wall breaking obsessive behavior towards the reader or whoever visits the website.

So, for now, I will write these as an x reader on Welcome Home based on what I think might be happening. If or when I do decide to write for it, they will be based on these headcanons as somewhat of a guideline. (Mainly because there is not enough information on Welcome Home yet).

_________________________________________________________

Welcome Home did start out as a children's show of course, that's how all puppet shows are. But something went wrong, leading to the cancellation of the show, recalling toys and merchandise of the characters. Not a single puppet toy could get out to the public. Not one. With nothing left from the show anymore it would be forgotten as the years went by...until someone(s) came upon a handsome little puppet. There is something off about Wally, his friends can feel it, but Wally is their best friend, he wouldn't mean any harm, he's here to help them and have the best of times! Right? Sometimes the others will notice Home acting different...and Wally has been staring quite a lot recently, often whispering back and forth with Home, listening to the squeaks and creaks as doors and shutters swung back and forth. Everything was perfect here, everyone was happy, everyone was friends. The best of friends. Best friends. One day, Eddie Dear was given a veerrry special letter to deliver. The address was set as Wally's Home. Wally looked so happy then when he opened the letter and read it, but he wouldn't say what it was, only that he would be away for a little while!

__________________________________________________________

All of the dust made it feel like you were going to sneeze your lungs out, but you stuck around to see what this antique store might have. There wasn't much that stood out until something colorful had caught your eye. It was a cute yellow puppet with a hairdo that reminded you of Elvis and clothes that even Mr.Rogers would envy. You gently picked up the colorful puppet and brought to the front of the shop to buy. A small twinkle of a light shone in the once dead eyes of the toy, what wonders does this little guy have in store you wonder. Wally is your best friend. Won't you come visit him?

_________________________________________________________

This is just to get me started on a feel of what I want to do/how I want to write for the reader inserts/x readers for Welcome Home. In case you didn't catch on, I personally think Wally wants the reader to join him and the others in their own world whether they like it or not. A reason I might make the first fanfiction more horror. No gore or anything, but more psychological horror like obsessive behavior and kidnapping (Magical world kidnapping? Does it count as kidnapping if you're forced into a whole other world full of cartoonish characters?)

[mylittleredgirl]

Hello friend! A friend of mine is doing a Stargate SG-1 rewatch and lamenting the slim pickings of fic on AO3. Do you know where she can find fic that perhaps is still on some old archive of yore? Or have any recs? She's mostly interested in Jack/Daniel and Jack/Sam. Ty!!

oh my. with all the love in the world to your friend visiting us from a very different fandom tax bracket than i have ever had the fortune to participate in (those two pairings have well over 6k fics each on ao3), i'll see what i can do!

[several hours of looking around later] bad news!! not much!

most of vintage sg-1 fandom was wiped out by expired domains, struck-through livejournals, ff.net's porn ban, yahoo lists, etc. some pages are still preserved in the wayback machine for heliopolis, the massive het-and-gen archive, and area52, the slash counterpart, but with the search and directory functions pretty much toast, they're almost impossible to navigate.

fanlore has an old list of archives (including plenty of jack/daniel ones). some smaller archives might yield wayback paydirt, especially if they were hand-coded. samandjack.net is still alive!

and, hate to say it, this was peak era for ff.net and they have like 30k fics over there... but all the explicit fic is gone.

i recently learned some people are still doing het-reccers (user-submitted fanfic recommendations, LJ archive is here). i don't know if any slash equivalents are still around (and i haven't looked at this site for genuinely fifteen years, so i can't speak to the quality of recs).

some sam/jack recs of mine; some of these authors multi-ship:

nanda: her resolution series especially should not be missed and i can't stress that enough. smut and action. fics great fics across the board.

it's kind of difficult to express how popular Salr323's fics were (under a different name) back in the day. i'm told that archive servers would crash when she posted something new. low on smut, high on PINING. rec: it was admittedly 1 am but as i recall this one made me feel like i'd just seen the fanfiction mona lisa

there are quite a few multifandom wonders who cut their teeth in this fandom, including missparker (rec: a small crime)

this cassandra fraiser fic dealt me some damage: nobody dies tonight by isawet

someone who's still in touch with her please harass splash_the_cat for writing 99 sg-1 fics and then walking away without cracking 100. lots of fun little snacks in there including this one

everything anr touches is gold <3

starting to get stressed out about who i'm missing!!!!

if your friend likes D/s this one is fun by tremontaine

lol read my stuff (i never wrote smut for sg-1 though)

hey everyone, please add recs in the notes/reblogs, especially jack/daniel recs because that's out of my wheelhouse but we aim to serve

[god-complex-12]

Doc

——

Pairing: 141 x [Medic] reader

Pronouns: he/him

Fandom: Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Disclaimer: Price has a little more description on y/n’s character, so you might wanna read that one, just a little fyi. Reader is almost a total ripoff of Doc from R6S.

A/n: This is a new post, not a repost.

Master list

Word count: 296

——

John P.

- He feels reassured when he hears Laswell was assigning a medic that would be in battle with them.

- He looked over the man’s file carfulled, seeing he had a PhD and a master’s in the medical field. All he could wonder is how this guy managed to juggle school and this military job.

- Once he had met y/n, he immediately analyzed his personality. He admired y/n’s extremely calm personality.

- He was very eager to put the medic into the field.

- He liked watching Doc from afar. Watching him care for those who are wounded and beating the shit out of those who inflicted those wounds.

- He was okay with that until he was the one who was hurt and getting pampered by the man.

Price hissed as he fell back onto the hallway wall. “Doc! Bedroom 1!” He barked, as soon as y/n showed any sign of helping the captain.

Y/n put his back against the wall next to the door, as he put his gun away and pulled out his knife. Soon the enemy stepped out, y/n grabbed the man, turning him around and pinning him against the wall, slitting his throat. Price watched, holding his gunshot wound.

Doc crouched down in front of his captain. Y/n unhooked Price’s gear vest and lifted up his shirt. Price then slapped y/n’s hand away.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Y/n stared at the captain for a second, blinking. “With all due respect, saving your damn life.”

[Gaz] Kyle G.

- I feel like Gaz is the type to get hurt a lot, but almost never seriously hurt.

- So he’s always the last one y/n will tend to unless he’s in dire need for assistance.

- He’s always giggling while y/n scolds him, and when he asks ‘why’ it’s always returned with ‘your hands are so soft that they tickle’.

- at some point y/n just stopped asking.

- In battle he liked to be close to the doctor, it puts him at ease. Not that y/n will be alright, but that he’ll be alright.

- Put full trust in the man. All of his trust.

Y/n tapped his pen against his desk as he looked over the unfinished paperwork on his desk. He allowed himself to relax a little even though he was still working. It was better than being shot at. Y/n heard a small knock at his door and he instinctively said, ‘come in’, but he regretted it when he saw Gaz holding his hand smiling in guilt.

“What up, Doc?” He said, hoping y/n wouldn’t be too mad.

“What’s wrong, Gaz?” Y/n put down his pen, folding his arms, putting his full attention on the man in front of him.

“I fell down when we were finishing up the mission and I sprained my wrist..” He mumbled.

“Oh, bloody hell.” Y/n cursed, getting up from his chair. “I’m not walking all the way to my doctor's office, so sit.” He said, patting the seat.

Gaz quickly made his way to the seat, sitting quietly. Y/n then crouched in front of him, resting one of his hands on the man’s thigh for support. He then grabbed Gaz’s wrist, looking over his. Kyle let out soft laughs, while y/n inspected him.

[Ghost] Simon R.

- Bro’s invincible. Y/n almost never saw him hurt

- Actually, he’s the one carrying y/n to safety on most occasions.

- Once Ghost is more comfortable expressing anything to the man, he’ll swing by his office to check up on him.

- Sometimes crack a joke, but that’s only if he’s in a good mood.

- He goes silent if y/n flirts with him. Y/n thinks Ghost just really doesn’t like it, but Ghost is actually just speechless.

“Tell Captain I said you were fine, just don’t move a lot.” Y/n said, patting Soap on the back. Soap nodded as jumped off the Doctor’s bed.

Y/n sighed and crossed his arms. “What did I just say?”

“Sorry..” Soap looked over to the doorway. “Oh, hey, Ghost.”

Y/n followed his gaze and smiled when he saw that oh so familiar skull mask. Ghost gave Soap a small nod in acknowledgement as he passed him.

Ghost made his way further into the room, holding eye contact with the medic. “What’s up, Ghost? Are you hurt or just here to loom over my shoulder like you’re waiting for my last breath?” Y/n asked, folding his hands in front of him.

“Are you comparing me to the grim reaper?” Ghost questioned.

“No, I’m comparing you to my father, what do you need?”

[Soap] Johnny M.

- He also gets hurt a lot, but his are always more serious.

- So he’d be laughing, flirting with y/n while y/n is trying to keep the idiot alive.

- When Soap enters y/n office, room, doctors office, y/n immediately asks if he’s okay,

Soap stumbled, falling into y/n’s arms after the mission. “Oh, fuck…” He cursed in pain.

“Are you alright, Soap?” Y/n asked with slight concern. Y/n then sat the both of them down. His gaze drifted down to the knife lodged into his abdomen.

“I got it.” He grunted, wrapping his fists around the knife.

Y/n then placed his hand on Soap's wrist. “No! No, no. Don’t pull that knife out until we are somewhere I know I can keep your ass alive.”

“I can barely walk.” Soap groaned.

“I’ll carry you, what do you want? Piggy back? Bridal? Baby?” Y/n asked, standing up.

“Baby. I’d have to jump on the others.”

Y/n nodded, and picked up the man. Soap then wrapped his arms and legs around them.

[Rudy] Rodolfo P.

- he doesn’t get hurt a lot, but he doesn’t have the healthiest diet, and that’s what y/n is worried about.

- After a while y/n started to keep track of his diet and suggest stuff he should eat.

- Rudy also loves to come see y/n when he’s working and not on a mission for them.

- Y/n can speak broken Spanish, so Rudy loves to use words he knows y/n don’t know to mess with him.

- especially when he’s explaining what’s wrong with him.

- he’ll pretend to be panicking, yelling random words in Spanish as if his loved one’s is dying and he’s talking to the dispatcher.

Rudy aggressively shoved his face with cotton candy he had picked up in town a few minutes ago.

“God, every time I see you you’re shoving your face hole full of toxic waste.” Y/n scolded.

Rodolfo silently put the sweet down, staring at the medic with a guilt ridden face. “If you keep eating that you’ll die of health issues instead of being shot heroically in the field.” Y/n continued.

“I just really like cotton candy..”

“You also really love m&m’s and hamburgers and grease filled chicken, and skittles, and-”

“Alright, I get it..”

“Apparently not because you’re still eating it.”

Rudy then placed the sweet down. “Damn, you’re worse than Price..”

“I mean come on, are you a Brit or are you an american?”

“I’m mexican.”

“Yes, but which one are you closer to?”

“... British.”

“Then act like it. Where I come from, you’ll get a heart attack from a heat burn.”

“That doesn't make sense.”

“I never said I understood why.”

Alejandro V.

- In my opinion, if anyone were to die of being reckless, it’s this man.

- It’s not because he’s stupid, it’s because he has anger issues.

- This man would get pissed off to the point he can’t think straight all because he stubbed his toe.

- Same ordeal with Rudy, but when he does it it’s an accident, and sometimes y/n doesn’t have the heart to tell him he doesn’t understand.

- Considering y/n doesn’t get mad often, if he does, Alejandro is scared shitless.

Alejandro cursed under his breath as he stumbled into the medic’s arms. He cursed again as he hysterically hopped on one leg. Y/n quickly picked the man up, sitting him down on a bench nearby.

“Malditos cuchillos estúpidos. ¡El hijo de puta cortó un jodido agujero en la parte posterior de mi muslo! ¡Lo voy a matar, carajo!” Alejandro then tried to stand up, but y/n put his hands on his chest, pushing him back down.

“Slow down, cowboy. Lay on your stomach, will ya?” Y/n asked nicely, trying to keep his composure.

“Don’t you tell me what to do, you-”

“Lay on your stomach, damn it.” Y/n demanded in a fit of anger.

Alejandro flinched at the tone, slowly switching his positions letting out a few curses in Spanish.

——

[disillusioneddanny]

DP x DC Fic Recs

A list of DPxDC fics that don't have the following tropes:

Danny gets adopted by the Waynes

Danny is rejected by his parents for being Phantom.

The lovely @spite-sapphic-starlight started a really wonderful list that you can read here

But lets just show a little more love for the fics that don't fit those tropes.

also disclaimer: this is not any hate to those tropes, i love them dearly and have written quite a few of them myself. but apparently that's all DPxDC seems to be known for so we should take some time to highlight some truly amazing fics.

Born to Make History by Halfagone and Nightshiftshenanigans

It's a Jason Todd/ Danny Fenton Figure Skating AU with a no powers AU and it's absolutely beautiful.

I’m Falling for you (Now we’re both Falling) by Milaley, ziazippy5379

Danny is a paramedic who moves to Gotham because he wants to help people and the pay for paramedics is good. He meets former police officer Dick Grayson who spoiler happens to be his soulmate. Danny's parents struggle with the fact that they are the reason he's a halfa but they don't reject him.

A Second Life by Die_Erlkonigin6083

Danny is reincarnated and wakes up to find himself a little boy who is the clone of Dick Grayson who decides to raise his clone as his son. This isn't really an adoption AU since Danny was created as a clone and he didn't run away from the Fentons, I can't really share more without spoiling the entire premise :3 but it's very good and is a good play on the Danny is a Wayne trope.

Fall Before You Fly by DisillusionedDanny, GuardianofDawn

Danny decides to go on vacation and explore the different universes, he goes to the DC universe and joins a circus and becomes an escapologist and meets Dick who wants to learn how he's so good at what he does.

Schrodinger's Danny by Die_Erlkonigin6083

The Fentons were never Danny's parents in this AU and he became a halfa in a completely different way. Danny is the twin brother of Damian and flees into the ghost zone letting everyone think he's dead. He's younger in this AU and honestly it's such a cool take on the DemonTwin trope.

Forget the Christmas Spirit (Run Away With Me) by halfagone (milkywxy)

Danny and Damian meet in Paris right before Christmas. They fall in love on the trip and Danny decides to spend Christmas with the Waynes instead of going back to his own family where his parents make Christmas an entire thing each year.

We Lit a Match by GuardianofDawn 

Danny has a gift that lets him see if people around him are going to die. He learns that he's the reason his family dies and runs away before that happens. He finds himself getting adopted by one Lex Luthor.

No bad parents Fentons, Danny runs away to keep them safe

Not adopted by a Wayne, it's Lex Luthor

it's a fun flip on both of those tropes.

Shovel Talk by SummersSixEcho

Danny and Tim go on a roadtrip for Tim to meet Danny's parents. Established relationship Tim/Danny

It's a very wonderful take on Good Parents Jack and Maddie Fenton and it's just a lovely story altogether.

Eat the Acid by DisillusionedDanny

Danny meets Conner Kent and falls head over heels in love with him. They discover that Vlad and Lex have teamed up to make the ultimate clone warrior. With the help of the Fentons and some unlikely friends they bring the clone back to Fentonworks so that they can raise their baby together away from Lex and Vlad.

These are just a few examples of fics that don't fall into those two tropes, they are all absolutely amazing and wonderful and the writers put a lot of work into these pieces of art. There are so many other fics that fall into these categories, I just don't have the time or space to add every single one but please don't act like all of DPxDC falls under the idea that Danny runs away to gotham to escape his evil scientist parents and gets adopted by the Waynes, that's a very small part of what this fandom does. It's a lovely part but it's not all that the DPxDC fandom is.

[splishsplashyouropinionistrash]

hello hello my loves, it's been a while since I've done a fic rec list and I'm feeling *inspired*

my qualifications are that i'm a loser and have read over a thousand fics so far in 2023

Was Sorta Hopin' That You'd Stay by jaydreamz (8/8)

Minyard Josten rivalry but they actually hate each other. They have a prank war. It's beautiful.

Eighteen Wheels And Three Beating Hearts by Autumnalpalmetto, IKnowWhoYouAre_Damianos (21/21)

Small town AU, Neil is a trucker with a son and Andrew runs a diner. So many found family feels, was giggling like a child the whole time. Connor owns my heart.

Die Free Or Die A Failure by Mickey_99 (54/54)

This one. This one!!! It's so good. Like, so good. It's a Raven!Neil fic, where Neil escapes the Nest and joins Kevin at PSU. It's super dark at times, but so lovely? The found family in this one is just *chefs kiss*

I Guess This Is Where I Say Goodbye by Artificiosus (2/2)

Listen y'all. I bawled like a baby reading this one. Full on ugly sobbing. It was amazing. It's MCD, so be careful. Neil gets in a car crash and calls Andrew, but Andrew doesn't pick up. The whole fic is Neil's voicemail and Andrew's reaction. It's so beautiful and so so sad.

Here And Where You Are by pentagrammed (1/1)

This one!!! It's almost sort-of MCD? But not actually. Read it, I'm begging. There's not much I can say about it without spoilers, so just... read it.

Dating & Other Disasters by lolainslackss, moonix (12/12)

Okok but this one. It's fake dating, the Foxes all go to a fine arts school. Neil is an actor and Andrew is a writer. It's so good !!! Andrew's poem lives rent-free in my head.

Murder Boyfriends by justadreamfox (3/3)

Heathers AU!!! It's beautiful, I'm in love with it. Go forth and read.

Better Than A Night Light by Ominous (1/1)

Literally 7k of fluff. Neil watches one of those alien horror movies and gets scared by it (but Drew is there to help, ofc)

Small Angry Gardeners by SensationalSunburst (8 part series)

Neil and Andrew's adventures in homeowning, gardening, meeting neighbors, owning animals, and other domestic bullshit. So fluffy, so sweet, so fun. Simply adore.

Heimkehr Means Homecoming by This_Witch_Writes (2 part series)

Cass is good! Andrew gets a mom! Family !!!! Literally so good, I cried a lot.

What Does 'Viral' Mean? by darkbluebox (1/1)

Kevin is a sports commentator after retirement, and Neil joins him for a game. So much bickering. Fucking hilarious

In Reel And Rout by maydaykevin (10/10)

Fantasy pirates AU. Vaguely Pirates of the Caribbean? So good though, oh my god. Andrew has water powers and shit. Neil is a pirate captain. I'm in love.

The Exy Team Is Nuts: A Survival Guide For The Uninitiated by Cute Negativity Cloud (Ofelia) (1/1)

The Foxes from the perspective of the other sports team. They have a whiteboard with rules for how to deal with them without being murdered/beaten up/insulted to death. It's fucking hilarious

Kill My Mind (Raise My Body Back To Life) by r3mus (1/1)

Ghostface!Andriel. They're murder boyfriends who kill bad people. It was such a fun read tbh

Queer Eye For The Demi Guy by neilwrites (13/13)

Neil goes on Queer Eye. The Monsters + Allison are the fab 5. it's wonderful, I love it.

Baby I'll Bleed You Dry by priorwalter (2 part series)

The Twilight AU this fandom desperately needed. In which Andrew is Edward, Neil is Bella, and many jokes are made. I spend a solid half an hour cackling

The Gaslights Burn Brightly by This_Witch_Writes (8/8)

Okok so Andrew and Neil were childhood friends, but Neil disappears one day and everyone convinces Andrew that he never existed at all. Eight years later, they meet again at PSU. It was so. Amazing. I love this author sm

A Dad By Any Other Name by SensationalSunburst (2/2)

Coach Wymack being a dad for 5k. That's it. That's the fic. (5+1 Wymack being a dad)

Called It Home by jingerhead (1/1)

Neil is spiderman. Spoilers for No Way Home. Guys it's so good !!

What We Ask by constellationqueen (40/40)

Neil gets hurt. Andrew helps him. SUUUUPER dark guys, like. Super dark. MCD too, so watch out. Really sad but so so beautiful, I sobbed so violently my sibling thought someone had died

The Suit Universe by marie_pothos (17 part series)

Ohhhhhh my god THIS ONE!!! My all time fave series. It's a popstar AU, but Neil is basically Taylor Swift. It's all based off of Taylor Swift songs. Absolute must read, even if you don't like TS that much. It's so beautiful, and funny, and so so sweet, and just- I could go on forever about this one.

Shake My Tomb by exactly13percent_OLD (hymbeaux) (10/10)

Butcher!Neil (sorta). kevin goes to Neil for protection from Riko, so neil goes to PSU. So beautifully written, I just re-read it today. It's so good guys.

Take To The Wing by iceEckos12 (20/20)

Neil signs the contract during his Christmas at Evermore. Surprisingly fluffy for a Nest fic, and there are some absolutely wonderful OCs. I would die for Joshua.

Something In Return by reaching_my_summit (10/10)

Neil and Andrew go to Disney World. That's the whole fic. Tooth-rotting fluff, it's amazing

Funky Happenings With The Fox Family by dobbypussypopper (27/27)

THE Fox group chat fic. It's fucking hilarious, I laughed so hard I started crying.

The Marks We Make by Fortheloveofexy (11/11)

Soulmate AU. Guys, this fic. It's one of my favorites. I reread it all the time. It's so good, and so sweet, and just UGH. I adore it so much.

Falling. by Idnis (16/16)

Art School AU where Andrew is a photographer and Neil is a painter. It's so poetic and beautiful, I'm begging you to read it.

Too Gay To Function by gluupor (1/1)

Mean Girls fusion. Andrew is Regina George. Enough said.

And there you go! This is a very very small fraction of the fics I've read this year, so obviously I have more if anyone's interested.

Go forth and read !

[cha-melodius]

Five Ten Under 500

There have been a bunch of open tags on this one but @three-drink-amy tagged me directly so here goes. To start I have to say it's wild to me, as someone coming from small or quiet fandoms, and who joined the RWRB community well before the movie, that netting under 500 kudos is now considered a lower number in this fandom. A couple of years ago it meant a lot to me to hit 500 kudos for the first time on a fic. Anyway.

I've loved seeing everyone's lists (so many new fics added to my tbr!), but they've also reminded me that there is a definite recency bias, especially among fics that didn't already have a good number of kudos. So, all of my choices are fics that were released before the movie came out. Even with that, I couldn't stick with only five, so you get five more under the cut (and I still had to leave out a lot of fics I loved, including others from the same authors listed here).

Culper Ring, 1778–1783 by @historicallysam This is a series of 10 vignettes set during the American revolution and not one of these fics has over 100 kudos, which is a crime. So well-written and researched, and full of intrigue and feelings, I will always champion this series of fics.

Why Do We Even HAVE That Curse? by @cricketnationrise The Mummy AU. Who doesn't love The Mummy?? I might be biased because I betaed this one but if you love action and adventure and romance, you must read this!

The Way You Seemed by @orchidscript 1950s High School AU—think Grease but gayer. I think this might be one of the first Cora fics I read, and it bowled me over. The vibes, the romance, the historical accuracy, it's so so excellent.

Red, White, & Royal Ballet by @tintagel-or-cockleshells Ballet AU. Everything you want out of an enemies/rivals to lovers arc, and so much excellent ballet. Includes videos!

Love and Hate at the Farmers' Market by @myheartalivewrites Farmers market vendors AU. This is soooooo adorable and about to be very seasonable! Never get tired of Alex being mad about Henry's very existence.

El Chico Del Apartamento 512 by @14carrotghoul A cute little enemies-to-lovers neighbors AU and an absolute riot!

Soli by @cheesecurdsgravyandfries Orchestra AU! As an oboist, Henry as principle oboe owns my entire heart. This is so sweet and lovely!

make the yuletide gay by @dumbpeachjuice The concept behind this one is absolutely unhinged, but it's just as hilarious as you would expect from our dear peaches. Put it on your list for reading this holiday season!

a pillar i am, upright by inmoonlightigetseasick Surprise surprise, another historical AU. Medieval knight/prince, together at the front of war. Really wonderful development of their relationship and truly excellent vibes.

and if you'll forgive me the self-promotion...

The Spirit of Giving by yours truly Also for the holidays, a neighbors AU that leans heavily on the food as a metaphor for love trope.

[blubberquark]

Are Game Blogs Uniquely Lost?

All this started with my looking for the old devlog of Storyteller. I know at some point it was linked from the blogroll on the Braid devlog. Then I tried to look at on old devlog of another game that is still available. The domain for Storyteller is still active. The devblog is gone.

I tried an old bookmark from an old PC (5 PCs ago, I think). It was a web site linked to pixel art and programming tutorials. Instead of linking to the pages directly, some links link led to a twitter threads by authors that collected their work posted on different sites. Some twitter threads are gone because the users were were suspended, or had deleted their accounts voluntarily. Others had deleted old tweets. There was no archive. I have often seen links accompanied by "Here's a thread where $AUTHOR lists all his writing on $TOPIC". I wonder if the sites are still there, and only the tweets are gone.

A lot of "games studies" around 2010 happened on blogs, not in journals. Games studies was online-first, HTML-first, with trackbacks, tags, RSS and comment sections. The work that was published in PDF form in journals and conference proceedings is still there. The blogs are gone. The comment sections are gone. Kill screen daily is gone.

I followed a link from critical-distance.com to a blog post. That blog is gone. The domain is for sale. In the Wayback Machine, I found the link. It pointed to the comment section of another blog. The other blog has removed its comment sections and excluded itself from the Wayback Machine.

I wonder if games stuff is uniquely lost. Many links to game reviews at big sites lead to "page not found", but when I search the game's name, I can find the review from back in 2004. The content is still there, the content management systems have been changed multiple times.

At least my favourite tumblr about game design has been saved in the Wayback Machine: Game Design Tips.

To make my point I could list more sites, more links, 404 but archived, or completely lost, but when I look at small sites, personal sites, blogs, or even forums, I wonder if this is just confirmation bias. There must be all this other content, all these other blogs and personal sites. I don't know about tutorials for knitting, travel blogs, stamp collecting, or recipe blogs. I usually save a print version of recipes to my Download folder.

Another big community is fan fiction. They are like modding, but for books, I think. I don't know if a lot of fan fiction is lost to bit rot and link rot either. What is on AO3 will probably endure, but a lot might have gone missing when communities fandom moved from livejournal to tumblr to twitter, or when blogs moved from Wordpress to Medium to Substack.

I have identified some risk factors:

Personal home pages made from static HTML can stay up for while if the owner meticulously catalogues and links to all their writing on other sites, and if the site covers a variety of interests and topics.

Personal blogs or content management systems are likely to lose content in a software upgrade or migration to a different host.

Writing is more likely to me lost when it's for-pay writing for a smaller for-profit outlet.

A cause for sudden "mass extinction" of content is the move between social networks, or the death of a whole platform. Links to MySpace, Google+, Diaspora, and LiveJournal give me mostly or entirely 404 pages.

In the gaming space, career changes or business closures often mean old content gets deleted. If an indie game is wildly successful, the intellectual property might ge acquired. If it flops, the domain will lapse. When development is finished, maybe the devlog is deleted. When somebody reviews games at first on Steam, then on a blog, and then for a big gaming mag, the Steam reviews might stay up, but the personal site is much more likely to get cleaned up. The same goes for blogging in general, and academia. The most stable kind of content is after hours hobbyist writing by somebody who has a stable and high-paying job outside of media, academia, or journalism.

The biggest risk factor for targeted deletion is controversy. Controversial, highly-discussed and disseminated posts are more likely to be deleted than purely informative ones, and their deletion is more likely to be noticed. If somebody starts a discussion, and then later there are hundreds of links all pointing back to the start, the deletion will hurt more and be more noticeable. The most at-risk posts are those that are supposed to be controversial within a small group, but go viral outside it, or the posts that are controversial within a small group, but then the author says something about politics that draws the attention of the Internet at large to their other writings.

The second biggest risk factor for deletion is probably usefulness combined with hosting costs. This could also be the streetlight effect at work, like in the paragraph above, but the more traffic something gets, the higher the hosting costs. Certain types of content are either hard to monetise, and cost a lot of money, or they can be monetised, so the free version is deliberately deleted.

The more tech-savvy users are, the more likely they are to link between different sites, abandon a blogging platform or social network for the next thing, try to consolidate their writings by deleting their old stuff and setting up their own site, only to let the domain lapse. The more tech-savvy users are, the more likely they are to mess with the HTML of their templates or try out different blogging software.

If content is spread between multiple sites, or if links link to social network posts that link to blog post with a comment that links to a reddit comment that links to a geocities page, any link could break. If content is consolidated in a forum, maybe Archive team could save all of it with some advance notice.

All this could mean that indie games/game design theory/pixel art resources are uniquely lost, and games studies/theory of games criticism/literary criticism applied to games are especially affected by link rot. The semi-professional, semi-hobbyist indie dev, the writer straddling the line between academic and reviewer, they seem the most affected. Artists who start out just doodling and posting their work, who then get hired to work on a game, their posts are deleted. GameFAQs stay online, Steam reviews stay online, but dev logs, forums and blog comment sections are lost.

Or maybe it's only confirmation bias. If I was into restoring old cars, or knitting, or collecting stamps, or any other thing I'd think that particular community is uniquely affected by link rot, and I'd have the bookmarks to prove it.

Figuring this out is important if we want to make predictions about the future of the small web, and about the viability of different efforts to get more people to contribute. We can't figure it out now, because we can't measure the ground truth of web sites that are already gone. Right now, the small web is mostly about the small web, not about stamp collecting or knitting. If we really manage to revitalise the small web, will it be like the small web of today except bigger, the web-1.0 of old, or will certain topics and communities be lost again?

[shalotttower]

Bound

Title: Bound

Fandom: Far Cry 5

Summary: It's been two months since you ended up in a bunker with Joseph Seed.

Word count: 1300+

Characters: Joseph Seed x Reader (female)

Notes: Bunker ending, soft (?) yandere Joseph Seed, forced proximity (non-sexual), character study, power imbalance.

What baffles you most is the conviction with which Joseph speaks of his beliefs. As someone who is used to doubt a lot of things and subject them to the most stringent analyses, it's astounding, and not in a good way.

It's not that you think the possibility of a superior, omnipresent, all-seeing being, capable of making miracles and influencing the lives of all men, is something unlikely or impossible. You simply don't think such a deity, if one existed, would waste time granting an individual the unique ability to hear their voice. And if you know something about god after a few years of Catholic school back when you were a kid, is that kidnappings, torture and mass conditioning are not on the list of virtues.

Joseph is eccentric. Even by cult leader standards. And the more he speaks, the more you want to bury your head under the pillow or chew on the bedframe until he stops. The problem is that Joseph doesn't seem to be stopping any time soon. He's been talking for about an hour already; a little bit of the Testaments, a whole lot of the Book of Revelation.

Your bed isn't exactly comfortable and the springs dig painfully into the small of your back, but at least it has clean bedsheets. It's the only one in the bunker; there're two more in the medical room, but Joseph is keeping the keys from it somewhere only he knows. Every time the topic of sleeping arrangements comes up, he reiterates over and over, like one of those broken tapes, that you're sharing. "God provides" and "the Voice is benevolent" and the bunker is "prepared for the future family of Eden". You do your best not to think about the latter. The fact that you're stuck with him for the next...how long in fact? Four years, five, six? It's enough alone.

"You're not listening," he says suddenly, startling you.

"I am," you lie.

"You're not."

"I am," you continue, knowing well that you'll never win this argument.

He sighs, like you're a student who refuses to learn despite all his efforts. "What was the last thing I said?"

You shrug, and he sighs again.

"Please, child," he says, placing his book on the bedside table. He always does that, uses the word like it's a term of endearment, not a mark of his condescension. You want to object. You have a name. And you're as far from a child as you could possibly be: a grown woman with a mortgage (which doesn't matter now) and a stable job (that doesn't exist anymore), and friends (you don't know what happened to them). You don't tell him that though. If there's one thing you're sure of, it's that arguing with him is a waste of breath.

"The Flood," you say reluctantly. Joseph nods, satisfied, and you roll your eyes.

He likes monologuing. Back when you were cuffed to the frame, in the very beginning of this mess, he'd sit by your side and quote scripture or recount the events from his life; and you had to listen, because there was nothing else to do. At least now you can walk around, though it still doesn't stop him from pestering you whenever he pleases. There isn't a single spot where you could be completely alone — he hovers behind you like a shadow wherever you go. Sometimes it feels like Joseph Seed is everywhere: in every crevice of the bunker; on each surface; seeping through cracks; crawling up your skin, unavoidable, suffocating.

You wonder what will happen first — you going insane or the nuclear winter ceasing outside. Or maybe Joseph will run out of his formidable patience and finally snap your neck. You doubt the latter though. Joseph Seed seems unfazed by everything: insults, threats, pleas, curses, silence. He strokes your hair when you're not on your best days or holds your hands while walking down to the kitchen area, like he genuinely cares about you, or believes that he does. His hands are calloused and stronger than they look, much stronger, in fact; they hold you firmly by arms to keep you still when you try to wriggle out of his embrace during the night, and they also tighten painfully on your wrist whenever you attempt to leave his lectures before he allows you.

"Are you done?" You ask, interrupting Joseph mid-sentence. "I need to pee."

He pauses, looking at you for another minute before closing his book. That's something he does too during these sessions: makes you wait until he grants permission for even the most basic things like relieving yourself.

"Yes," he answers after a prolonged moment of contemplation. "It doesn't look like you're paying attention anyway."

You stand up, ignoring this comment. Joseph follows you with his gaze as you cross the room and disappear behind the door. You wish the bathroom had a lock at least — there's none, he says that seclusion breeds danger, probably cautious of suicide attempts. He has decency not to follow you in though. At least in that regard, Joseph respects your privacy, even though the concept is probably foreign to him.

You despise it so damn much: his presence, his touch, your forced proximity and those cold, piercing blue eyes. Joseph Seed unsettles you on a deep level — there's something fundamentally off about him, something you can't put your finger on from the start, but it's there, in the way he stares without blinking; in how calm and collected he remains even when you scream and kick when he just can't fucking get it and give you a moment to breathe. Joseph is unnerving, and his voice...his goddamn voice now haunts you whenever you're not with him, even here, in the bathroom.

And you think Joseph knows it. Of course, he does. It's written on your face, clear as day. He is perceptive like that, observant like few other people you know. But it doesn't deter him. He sees through the wariness that permeates your whole being, straight to your heart where he's nestled comfortably already, making himself a permanent fixture. Joseph Seed isn't going anywhere. You're both stuck here together until the very end of it.

You wash your hands afterward and glance at your reflection in the mirror above the sink. A pale face greets you in response — it hasn't seen sunlight for almost two months. Your skin feels dry no matter how many times you massage the ointment Joseph brought from the storage in it. There are bags under your eyes too. You wish he didn't care at all. Just let you be.

"Are you hungry?" Joseph asks, when you step out of the bathroom. You shake your head; there're some food leftovers from lunch, but you aren't in the mood for eating. He frowns slightly. "Child..."

"Don't call me that," you snap. You're tired of it, and feel like the period which has been absent during the first month will soon catch up on you. "I have a name."

"I am aware," he answers slowly. Joseph tilts his head to the side, considering you for a minute or two. Then, with measured steps like one would come to a frightened animal, he approaches and reaches out with his hand. The touch is soft, careful; it sends shivers down your spine and you try to retreat, Joseph catches you with ease, pulling you closer. His arm wraps around your waist in a gesture that's supposed to be soothing. Well, it's not. You struggle to get free, but he is stronger, despite his lean build.

"Let go," you protest weakly. Joseph hushes you and puts his chin on top of your head. You don't want him so close, it also frightens you how fast his touch grows familiar, as well as this sense of false security. Like he's putting a blanket over your eyes. His hand stokes your back, up, down, repeat.

"God sends us trials," he murmurs into the top of your head. "We must endure them. And I'll be here to help you bear this burden."

You want to gag, but swallow instead.

"I'll make some soup," Joseph adds after another moment of prolonged silence. He lets you go finally and retreats to the kitchen area with unhurried steps.