Tumgik
#to be clear i dont want to experience either
moniquill · 1 day
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Saving this because the thread is probably going to be deleted. Mild rearranging done to show the actual flow of conversation rather than tumblr's befuckened threading
The players are @balearicbitch , @ollieoneill, and myself - @moniquill
On the question of 'Should I donate to ao3'
balearicbitch: no also stop reading fanfics and grow up
moniquill: I'm sorry that your life is so lacking in joy.
balearicbitch: it isnt tho i just read normal books instead
moniquill: "other people are reading and enjoying independently published fiction and I have very strong opinions about that, driving me to declare those people immature" is some seriously joyless behavior. Are you ok?
ollieoneill: People can do both. You’re really gross and the one who needs to grow up.
ollieoneill: Lol they are definitely not okay. I want to feel bad for people like @balearicbitch but they’re so hateful and pathetic all I can do is shake my head
balearicbitch: i dont know what to tell you but if youre older than 16 and still play pretend with fictional characters try to have experiences in the real world?!
ollieoneill: Babe I’m a married 36yo and travel the world pretty much constantly and have a wonderful, full life. I also read fan fiction. You seriously need to grow up and get a life and stop telling other people how to enjoy theirs you utterly pathetic gremlin.
moniquill: I'm 41, I play pretend with fictional characters, and I've won a Nebula and a Hugo about it. Who do you think authors the 'normal books'?
balearicbitch: "other people are reading and enjoying independently published fiction" when the fiction in question is just creating scenarios based on other people work to fulfill your need of Media Consumer
balearicbitch: looks like anyone is getting awarded these days ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
moniquill: You're the one who wanted to make a delineation between fanfiction and Normal Books.
balearicbitch: and i still stand by it. fanfiction isn't literature nor should be treated like it.
moniquill: Ok. I hear you. You're objectively incorrect, and welcome to be wrong in your wrongness. I'd say 'have fun with that' but it's clear that you're not having fun and that you don't want anyone else to have fun either. It must be a miserable way to exist, and I sincerely hope that you're able to move past it someday.
balearicbitch: have fun with your little blorbos, im sure what the literary world needs right now is another ali hazelwood
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fun-k-boards · 8 months
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I've never understood the excitement around marriage. I've never understood the 'rush' around the idea of a relationship. I've never understood the heartbreak or annoyance people feel when they're alone for valentine's day, or when their partner doesn't give them a gift for it. I've never understood why someone would like kissing with their tongues or on the lips. I've never understood why naked bodies are sexual. I've never understood why I should feel my world shatter when someone rejects me. I've never understood why I should be expected to 'just give the relationship a try' when someone confesses to me. I've never understood why friends will demean someone by implying they just 'aren't good enough' because their friend got rejected by that person, no matter how gentle or respectful the rejection was.
I've never understood why sex and romance need to be brought up and hyper focused on in every conversation imaginable.
I'll probably never understand.
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transmascissues · 2 years
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i love you testosterone i love you voice cracks i love you bass notes i love you loud laugh i love you fuzzy mustache i love you whispy patchy beard i love you bushy eyebrows i love you hairy stomach i love you knuckle and hand hair i love you boy smell i love you bottom growth i love you new orgasms i love you big nose i love you square jaw i love you squishy stomach i love you thighs that touch i love you stretch marks i love you acne i love you acne scars i love you body heat i love you appetite i love you mood stability i love you balanced hormone cycle i love you puberty awkwardness i love you uncertainty i love you adjustment i love you transformation i love you change i love you maturation i love you growth i love you freedom i love you euphoria i love you comfort i love you familiarity i love you recognition i love you second chances i love you masculinization i love you embodied manhood i love you testosterone
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smultronviol · 7 months
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Honestly I think the most unforgivable crime comitted by the new ATLA adaptation is bringing back the fucking kataang/zutara discourse🥰
Like, I can forgive a lot, but I can't forgive the fact that my own eyes, in the year of our lord 2024, have to be subjected to takes I first saw on 2011 DeviantArt
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another weekend, another job rejection!
#and now no more positions are open to apply to! for now at least. some more will probably drop soon. fuck i hope so.#love just. being fucking unable to even make it into the interview phase for my extraordinarily lofty career goal#Of Working In A Fucking Library#just. so thrilled.#kazoo noises#anyway tomorrow morning i have to find a time to talk to my rabbis bc if i dont figure shit out i have to pick between becoming jewish or#graduating on time and i have fucking NO ONE i can talk to this about and ive used up like all of my good will in all of my personal#relationships already and i am So Fucking Sick of feeling mean and petty and evil all the time but my options are either fucking smile and#be noticeably fake optimistic when i get called on my bullshit or burn like all three of my last remaining bridges#i just dont see why i cant even make it to interviews. like i can accept not being the right fit or whatever. but like. it really kinda is#everyone but me whos employed by now.#man. like listen. its not my professors fault. i get that i've got her in a bad position.#but she said ''sometimes we have to pick between sources of joy'' like MAN--#do NOT speak to me about that. absolutely the FUCK not.#you! are employed and have been in this field for over a decade and i work in a grocery store with no sign of luck changing.#i need to be in this section bc 1) im not fucking doing academia with a gun pulled on me#2) i need to actually get some kind of professional experience since its clear i can't actually get a job on merit so i guess i will pay to#go further into debt#anyway no one is around to talk to me about this and i hate bitching to my friends about how fucking hopeless i feel all the fucking time s#everyone please look away from my diary posting and think of me as sexy and fun and bubbly <3333#like. its literally no ones fault so i should not be this fucking resentful.#and yet.#yeah im probably not getting classed as a good person for another several years. shame. ive always wanted to be good.#library travails
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technicolorxsn · 10 months
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I will say, the funny thing about people arguing that there is a fundamental difference between "skilled" and "unskilled" art is that there are so many professional artists who are massively talented that choose to make "unskilled" art even though they very much have the ability to make "skilled" art. it's almost like there's merit and worth in it, ain't it?
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good-chimes · 1 year
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THE RULES OF BUTTERCUP CAMP
Rule 1: No friendly fire in the camp.
Rule 1a: NO GRAVEL, NO SAND, NO FALLING BLOCKS
Rule 1b: SCAR THIS MEANS YOU
--- I dont know What you’re talking about
--- You know exactly what I’m talking about!
Rule 1c: Grian is not allowed to make Scar strip down to his underwear on the Perimeter edge to ‘find all the sand’; this makes us look bad in front of Doc.
--- He had it in his SHOE
--- counter-rule!! Actually this makes us look GReat in front of doc. my abs intimidate him.
--- There’s no such thing as a ‘counter rule’ and your abs don’t intimidate anyone
--- mumbo agrees with me!!
--- I. Um. I just think Scar’s abs could be good PR. I’d be impressed if I were Doc.
Rule 2: All Buttercups must remember at all times that Doc is the enemy and we are here to TAKE HIM DOWN.
Rule 3: Goateater is not allowed to eat Mumbo’s pillow.
Rule 3a: we should leave GOateater alone because she’s doing her Best
--- Scar, she’s doing her best to eat my pillow!
--- this is proving resorcefullness and initive like a good Buttercup!
Rule 4: Mumbo’s cooking tastes like a camping mat and he’s not allowed on the cooking rota
Rule 5: grian cant cook us eggs for more than 2 meals in one day
Rule 6: I have to say I agree with Rule 5.
--- Mumbo needs to LEARN HOW RULES WORK
--- and also stop being RUDE about my COOKING
Rule 7: Goateater is not allowed in Mumbo’s bed under any circumstances.
--- mumbo is biased against Goateater!!
--- Then make her sleep in your bed, Scar!
Rule 8: Grian is allowed to push Scar into the Perimeter if he does the sand thing one more time
Rule 9: Grian is allowed to push Scar into the Perimeter if he refuses to put a shirt back on and is being really obnoxious about it
Rule 10: Grian is allowed to push Scar into the Perimeter if he keeps snoring at night
--- Mate, we’re getting some expansion of powers here that I’m not entirely comfortable with.
--- yknow its not tJHAT Bad
--- Okay, so, Scar, listen, just because you’ve never minded doesn’t mean Grian should be able to do what he likes. This is setting a precedent. We need to talk about this.
Rule 11: Grian is allowed to push anyone into the Perimeter for any reason necessary
--- I told you! I TOLD you!
--- Cmon Mumbo a man’s gotta have hobbies
--- Not threats-of-immediate-violence-to-his-two-closest-friends hobbies!
--- WAnt some sand?
--- I CAN LITERALLY SEE WHAT YOU TWO WRITE HERE. SCAR I AM COMING FOR YOU.
--- Good LUck :)
Rule 12: Grian is not allowed to keep stealing Mumbo’s HotGuy poster for his own tent then denying it.
Rule 12a: Grian is encouraged to get his own poster or pay Mumbo 16 diamonds.
Rule 13: Buttercups are reminded to focus their efforts on DOC and how everything is DOC’S FAULT, not SPYING ON THEIR FRIENDS about POSTERS.
Rule 14: Goateater is not allowed in Mumbo’s entire tent.
Rule 15: Goateater is allowed whrever she likes, including in MUmbos tent.
Rule 16: Scar is not allowed to write rules that contradict previous rules.
Rule 17: Mumbo is not allowed to do that either!!
Rule 17a: If Mumbo and Scar don’t stop fighting over the rules board and GET US SOME DRINKING WATER LIKE THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO then Grian gets to throw them both in the Perimeter
--- I thought everything was Doc’s fault.
--- Sometimes it’s your fault, Mumbo!
Rule 18: Look, can we have some sort of punishment here that isn’t ‘Grian pushes people in the perimeter?’ Only he’s not pushing himself in the perimeter, and last night he blew up a firework experiment in the campfire and took half my moustache off.
Rule 18a: That was obviously Doc’s fault.
--- I don’t think it’s Doc’s fault if you did it yourself! In fact, you’re the reason we’re here in the first place. There’s sand in my sleeping bag and I’ve lost half my moustache and Goateater keeps eating my shoes!
--- also I gotta pointout G you never paid me for those fireworks
--- Listen, Buttercups, the rules are very clear about who’s to blame. It’s Doc’s fault.
--- That’s pretty rich coming from you, Grian!
--- also goateater is perfect and hasn’t done anything wrong
--- Shut up, Scar, this is Grian’s fault. I’m making a new rule.
Rule 19: I think we should blame Grian for everything
Rule 20: I secnd this rule
Rule 21: Oh, yeah? Well, I think we should blame SCAR for getting me BAD FIREWORKS
Rule 21a: those were top quality scarland fireworks, Mister!
Rule 22: It was Scar who technically broke the tunnel bore so he’s the reason we’re here
Rule 23: I mean, I guess—Scar, mate, you did do that.
Rule 24: I think we should blame Scar for everything
Rule 25: now wait A MINute
Rule 26: Yes, honestly, it’s mainly Scar’s fault.
Rule 27: Its not!
Rule 28: It’s either you or Grian. I think either way we can all agree I’m the innocent victim here.
Rule 29: What – okay, fine, new plan! I think we should blame MUMBO for everything!
Rule 30: yeah!
NEW RULE: MUMBO IS BANISHED FROM THE BUTTERCUP CAMP
NEW RULE: OH I AM, AM I? WELL THEN, GRIAN IS BANISHED FROM THE BUTTERCUP CAMP!
NEW RULE: OKAY! I GUESS THIS IS MY CAMP NOW! IM MOVING JELLIE INTO YOUR TENTS AND SERVS YOU BOTH RIGHT!
Rule 34: Guys?
Rule 35: …guys?
board suspended :(
Rule 36: fine I’m back
Rule 37: strewing my bed with cherry blossom wasn’t actually necessary
Rule 38: Aw, Scar, you shouldn’t have.
--- i missed you guys
--- I missed you guys too!
--- It’s been TWENTY MINUTES
--- admit it G you missed us
--- Fine I did
--- But I think I have time for a second shot
--- GRIAN
--- joking <3
Rule 39: All previous rules are suspended.
Rule 1: It’s Doc’s fault.
Rule 2: Grian is still allowed to push people into the perimeter.
--- mumbo, wheres Goateater?
--- Special mission, mate, don’t worry about it.
WHY HAS SOMETHING **EATEN** ALL MY ***CROCS***!
YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS, BUTTERCUPS!!
– G.O.A.T.
p.s. Also kindly return my hotguy poster, Grian, I know that this was you
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etherealkissed88 · 9 months
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i got what i wanted in the 3d but why did i keep assuming negative?
today i found myself assuming that something negative (that ive experienced before) was going to happen again soon. but this was without any clear evidence that it would happen. there was subtle evidence but then i caught myself and realized that is was all an assumption and i thought “why am i even assuming negative if i know the power of the law?💀” so i decided it wouldnt end up that way and i let it go. hours later i saw clear evidence of the complete opposite of my negative assumption. this means that everything was going good like no negative shit was gonna happen and i still literally got physical evidence of what i wanted. at the same time, i felt uncertain and again assumed that negative thing was still gonna happen soon (even tho i saw evidence that it it wouldnt happen).
why did i feel uncertain even tho what i wanted appeared right in front of me? because in reality, i was chasing the feeling. i wasnt fulfilled, i wasnt satisfied within. this is what ppl mean when they say “its the feeling you want, you dont want it in the 3d”. sure you want the object and the physical experience but notice how the “real” and physical thing did not satisfy me at all. i literally manifested what i wanted yet i didnt feel like it would last. the 3d will never give you what you want. it will always be that inner fulfillment that gives you want you want. fulfillment is what gives you the satisfaction so if youre saying that you manifested something in the 3d and felt secure, thats because you were fulfilled. why did i also get what i wanted in the 3d yet i didnt feel secure? it will always come down to the fulfillment. that fulfillment is the FEELING! the feeling of knowing you have it despite seeing it in the 3d or not. this is also why the 3d never matters; its all neutral. bc everything IS based on assumptions and states. you see the world based on which state you are in. if im in the state of being broke, i will look at a $50 headphones as too expensive and i wouldnt feel secure in buying it. but if i was in the state of being a millionaire, i would look at a $50 headphones as if it was fifty cents and i would feel secure in even buying a more expensive one. its not about the 3d, its about if you feel fulfillment because either way if you have it in the 3d and still dont feel as if its not rly yours (fulfillment), then you will continue to assume negative and feel unsecured in your manifestation.
“as within so without” right? this is why when you are satisfied internally, you feel satisfied externally; it gets pushed out because self is always expressed in the 3d. someone who is not satisfied with being a millionaire within, can never feel good in the 3d until they fulfill themselves within (or change states where being a millionaire is normal for them). everything truly is the feeling and everything truly starts within.
back to assumptions: i continued to assume negative even with positive evidence in front of me because i wasnt giving myself the feeling. i didnt feel satisfied within. assumptions are accepting ideas without evidence. i clearly assumed correctly because i didnt have evidence that that negative thing was going to happen but i clearly was in a state of fear which is what caused me to continuously have that assumption. whatever state you are in affects your assumptions. lucky for me and you, we can change states and assumptions instantly. other than that, next time you find yourself assuming negative, stop yourself and just decide/assume it will all work out. change your state -> you are now the person who already has what they want.
anywayz, i realized all this in a span of 7 seconds after i got the physical thing i wanted but still assumed negative. i wanted to make this post because ppl could be doing the same thing and still feeling stuck and thinking that something is wrong with them when thats not the case. catch yourself and assume positive. make it a habit that whenever you want something, fulfill yourself right away. assume its done right away. update: i assumed and fulfilled myself with what i wanted and i no longer feel the need to assume the negative shit 😛. the power of fulfillment am i right ?
kisses, jani ☆
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the-s1lly-corner · 4 months
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Hi, may i request some headcanons for Toby, Ej and Ben with a S/O who is really clumsy and always has new bruises?
toby, ej, and ben x reader who is clumsy
my legs hurt i hate how they tense up when i get stressed out it hurts so much notes: reader is gn, ben is platonic as i do not feel comfortable writing romantic for him, heavy hcs for all of them naturally but esp ben cws: edit
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toby
he has a little bit of a disconnect between pain and injuries- both for himself and other people. obviously for himself its because of his CIPA, and that leaks into how he perceives others. he knows it hurts for them but he doesnt fully understand to what degree
still, he does his best to sympathize with you when you get hurt- actually you guys likely come up with a system.. a scale to rank how painful it is.. not just for physical pain! i can easily see this being used as a general thing for you guys to rate an experience both lightheartedly and as a serious thing
gets you meds as well as an icepack for your bruises so youre not too sore- hopefully
keeps an eye on the coloring of your skin, headcanon that he keeps tabs of the look of how an injury looks to determine severity.. as well as generally having a curiosity
he doesnt outwardly judge you all that much for your clumsiness, he knows his tics have caused some accidents so hes not going to fault you for a lot of your accidents
eyeless jack
tries to find a reason for your clumsiness, or at least tries to clear it of "okay do you have something internally thats happening", and if you actually do he does what he need to accommodate you
makes sure you dont needlessly get put into a situation that can lead to you getting hurt, he doesnt babyproof his place or yours.. nor does he treat you like youre a kid, but he does make precautions
lightly scolds you for not being careful if youre careless and roll with it as you get hurt- he doesnt want you to get hurt even if its something small
knows some tricks to lessen bruises before they get too bad, as well as ways to relieve any pain and swelling
medical interest really coming in clutch!
he hears crashing sounds and he just preps himself for whats about to transpire
he loves you but he does try to help you manage your clumsiness
ben
he thinks its a little funny that youre constantly hurting yourself, as long as its not a major injury- he also thinks its a little... pathetic... its a little mean for him to think that but hey, hes a bit of an asshole so its to be expected
he cant do much most of the time on account of him not being physically there- stuck in your phone or computer or some other device. but he does try to verbally be there for you- there in spirit!
if hes connected to the internet and hes able he does try to find some solutions to either lessen your clumsiness or how to make your bruises fade faster
tries to see if theres a cause to your clumsiness but its mostly him bullshitting you
"it could be a tumor" "you little shit its not a tumor"/ref/hj
more of a "lets move on and forget about it" kind of person, which isnt terrible especially if you find yourself embarrassed by your clumsiness
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honeytonedhottie · 9 months
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how to isolate and grow⋆.ೃ࿔*:・💶
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quick disclaimer : when i say "isolate" i dont mean the negative connotation of self isolation where you push everyone away, i mean the laying back and rly focusing and tapping into urself BY yourself.
accessibility : limit people's accessibility to you, or narrow down how many people you allow to access you. ur energy is SACRED ur time is a privilege. its important that ur no longer looking for outlets in people.
during this time of stepping back and being super picky with how and who u spend ur time with its the perfect opportunity to separate urself from the toxicity that some people in ur life might bring. in that same breath, its easier said for friends then it is for family members because when u think isolation ur probably thinking of being a home-body which is a part of it. but if ur home is whats making u sick then try and spend time AWAY of the home to do whatever u need to do.
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self awareness and responsibility : take a moment and be truly objective with urself. practice having the difficult conversations with urself. u know ur goals, but are u the person that can have those goals? and if not, how can u get to become that person.
this is also the time to address things that you've been sweeping under the rug. address anything thats starting to become a problem and address bigger problems in ur life. we wanna be able to take responsibility for ourselves and PROBLEM SOLVE. be super clear on what u wanna focus on during ur self isolation period and WHY you are choosing to do this.
find a mentor : find someone who resonates with you, whether it be online or in person, who is living the life that YOU wanna live or living a life similar to one that u wanna live. u dont have to have just one mentor, it can be multiple mentors for different aspects of ur life that u wanna improve. ur mentors dont even need to know you honestly, just someone u look up to
detox ur brain : mental diet. mindset is EVERYTHING as you know if you've been consuming my content lately. everything and i mean EVERYTHING begins in the brain. the thoughts that u think today will be what u experience tomorrow. speak to urself nicely, throw away old thoughts that dont align with ur dreams and replace them with positive ones thru repetition, fixed attention and practice
do brain dumps before u go to bed, its good to get out all of the thoughts in ur head before u go to sleep, out of ur brain and onto a piece of paper or something else in general. it doesn't have to be in a negative connotation either, write down ideas that pass thru ur head, goals, inspirations etc.
clean out : anything that u tend to cling to, whether its devices, drugs, drinking etc. practice fasting from it. it doesn't have to be extreme, just taking a break from it REGULARLY will improve it so much. an analogy i like to use for gradual change like this is with a rubber band. if u stretch the rubber band as far as it can go too quickly then it'll break, however if u gradually stretch the rubber band little by little, you can stretch it super far and it won't break.
experimentation : while ur self isolating this is the perfect opportunity to experiment with ur physical. dye ur hair a color that you've always been wanting it to. grow ur hair a couple inches, take extra good care of ur skin, experiment with different clothing styles. become ur own MUSE.
with that being said i wish everyone luck and blessings as you isolate and grow 🫶🏽
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butchbear-in-progress · 8 months
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I'm probably not the right person to do it since my disability is relatively minor, I have no platform and I don't talk like i have a degree, but I think we need to talk about the positive effects of feedism on our perceptions of physical disability because its really something special that needs to be nurtured
So many feedists being neutral/accepting or positive about mobility issues extend that far past the fantasy of kink and into their fat liberation and general lives. I don't see nonfeedists in those spaces talking about disability as anything but unfortunate reality, even if they're disability activists too. No one but a feedist has seen a good side.
Feedist disability positivity has encouraged me to actually use my crutches, bath boards, and alter my activity levels without feeling guilty. Feedists are genuinely the only people I know that accept "I can't physically manage that today" as a non negotiable answer regardless of whether they percieve my disability as being my fault or not (I was in an accident but people make up their own story since ive gained 100+lbs since then: either way I shouldnt have to specify how i acquired it!). They dont make me feel like shit when I admit I haven't been out or exercised in a few days even if I don't go into detail about why, largely because they don't associate it 100% with negative experiences by default. It can be a good time, a fun thing, hot even*
And to be clear, I don't just mean this is a cute way. There are good and bad sides to fetishising disability aids but seeing having to use a bath board to wash as something sexy makes me not hate myself for needing it. It's not for everyone but I am not everyone
*@fernisfat once said something in a photo caption about spending the evening at home getting fatter and I've been thinking it to myself even since. I'm not wasting time, I'm spending it on one of my favourite hobbies actually.
Ps. I know plenty of feedists are ableists and not like this but I don't want to talk or think about them right now thanks
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txttletale · 10 months
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idk if you wanted a response for the "What if nobody likes xyz person, do they just die?" idea under anarchist thought, but i think the reason it's brushed off so often is because in a lot of areas with mutual aid networks, at least in my experience, this has happened and either there were people involved who didn't mind the shitty person and helped or everyone gritted their teeth to help anyway.
i don't have an answer to "Well what if they dont", because that hasn't ever been an issue in any anarchist collective ive been in that already exists. same with more strenuous tasks like medicine, there's some diy hrt communities in my local anarchist community too and specifically our bathtub joe has delivered hormones to her rapist with the protection of a few people she trusts and a pocket knife if they tried anything.
i don't know if a lot of anarchists interact with you in good faith, and a lot of tumblr anarchists are baby leftists at best, so i wanted to answer even if your reply to this was dismissive
to be clear: i know and talk to a lot of cool anarchists, including friends and mutuals and comrades. the vast majority of anarchists i know -- "the best of the anarchists", as lenin once put it -- are serious and intelligent people worth enaging with, and while capitalism remains the order of the day, my political allies.
that said, i think you've slightly misunderstood the point i was making -- i was not discussing the bathtub joe situation to say "no hierarchy means people die, checkmate anarchists" -- i'm sure my hypothetical scenario could be resolved happily! rather, it is to illustrate that in a system with no formal hierarchy, there are going to be material and mechanical reasons that put someone in a position of de facto authority over someone else. if you get something that you need to survive from someone (or a group of someones) that person has power over you -- & if you Live In A Society, you will always need things from other people to survive. even if they don't excercise that power maliciously, it still exists.
& maybe that isn't an intractable problem! but i think anarchists need to start from a position of acknowledging that power is real when they talk about how things should be organized & i think they very often don't
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partycatty · 8 months
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you write for mk11 gramps johnny? have serious brain rot for him
if so could you write a fic of him dicking us down for being a brat? u can make up a plot or not i just need it and need him. love ur writing either way!!
- 💙
alright, im using this ask but i have a very specific image for this rn. this is gonna be a meaty post so hear me out
older!johnny cage > waste ur time
this is based off of the song WasteUrTime by Kevin Walkman with some lyrics (in pink) sprinkled in. you and johnny have a clear age gap, trying to avoid giving into desires, but 3am rolls around and you consider the idea of having a late night visitor.
warnings: smutty, age gap, ur both horny demons, virgin reader, i dont know how military ranks work, affair, sonya never gets Rocked
notes: this is going to be a little more artsy that what i usually do, so apologies if the format change is not ideal. this is more of an actual fic than bullet points. also the lyrics are out of order and not all included, so you don't need the song to enjoy this!
word count: 2.6k
[ masterlist ]
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give me a glass of your innocence.
training was hard, your skin glistening with sweat and your face flushed from overexertion. the task was relatively simple; to climb up a deeply sloped wooden platform using nothing but your grip and momentum. your comrades were cheering you on, including briggs, commander cage, her mother, and her father. straining yourself to grip the ledge of the platform, you finally hoist yourself up and stand upright, not before doubling over to pant.
the others applaud and surround you with cheers. a firm hand finds its place square on your back, rubbing in circles.
"atta girl," the voice leans into your ear with an audible grin. "knew you had it in you."
your head turns to thank the disconnected voice, but out of your fuzzy mind, the realization pulls through that none other than your superior, johnny cage was the one congratulating you so intimately. his praise makes your cheeks flush even darker and your gaze averts, too afraid of such direct appreciation which johnny notes. you weren't used to compliments.
this is my creation, here's your invitation.
you knew something intense was brewing with each lingering stare or gentle squeeze to your shoulder. how intense exactly, you couldn't pick out. with minimal experience with others lusting for you, it didn't register in your head at first just how hungrily he gazed at you. not that you were complaining necessarily, he was part-time action star, part-time military leader. he was built, charismatic, and a family man. it felt impossible to not feel weak in the knees around him.
johnny knew he had an effect on you, as he did most others. despite watering down his hollywood charisma, he couldn't bring himself to deny how sexy he was at his older age. something about a buff salt and pepper man telling you what to do had you following commands like a dog, doing anything it takes to have him praise you more.
even still, you couldn't do anything about it. johnny was a married man. his family was your coworkers, hell, it was their job to command you! the guilty thoughts would creep up on you no matter how badly you wanted to avoid them. couldn't you have chosen a more... single man?
you seem so damn nervous.
"how can i be of service?" johnny asks, leaning his front half forward ever so slightly to show you he was interested in every word that dripped from your lips. your vision was too blurred from anxiety to properly articulate what you needed from him, so you nervously swirled your drink. damn the special forces and their free alcohol parties.
"how do you do it?" you ask with a stammer. "earthrealm, netherrealm, tarkatans, ninjas, thunder gods. it all feels so unreal. how do you stay so calm?"
"mm," he hums, lowering his own glass after a brief sip. "well, you get used to it. turns out i was born to a mediterranean war cult's gene pool. watched my daughter kick an elder god's ass while i got maggots down my throat. went face-to-face with younger me. there are just some things that are too damn ridiculous to ever fully understand, so i accept it for what it is. when you're my age, fighting for all of these otherworldly things, most of the little things feel like a walk in the park."
"don't get me wrong, sir, i'll fight for earthrealm, but this is all so... dizzying."
johnny visibly tenses up at 'sir.' "tell you what," he grabs his drink napkin and opens a sharpie with his teeth. "you ever wanna talk about it with someone that's seen everything, you come to me." he writes his personal phone number on the napkin and places it in your palm with a smile.
you fidget with the paper before pocketing it, worried you'd pick at it too much and rip it to shreds before you could save the digits. the most you could bring yourself to do was half-bow, half-nod before scurrying away to the bathroom to cool your hot face. johnny could only chuckle to himself with a shake of his head.
long walks of shame look so good on you.
a long time was spent staring at the new conversation on your phone. despite your inexperience, there was a simmering feeling that johnny didn't just give you his number to let you vent. he wanted to talk to you outside of work. the thought makes you sweat.
why would he want to talk to you? if he wanted conversation, he would reach out to his wife and kid. he had it all, and yet he still wanted to put everything on the line for you.
you're moving fast, and i'm into it.
"lieutenant. it's reader," you shoot a simple text out, lying to yourself when you justify texting him for the sake of him saving your number. it was late, too late to be texting your superior. another lie you told yourself: i'll just send the message now so he sees it in the morning! your shameful justifications are ripped from you when you receive a reply, almost immediately.
"couldn't it have waited until the morning?" he replies bluntly, and you're ready to type out a spew of apologies before a second text comes through. "i'm teasing. johnny, by the way. no need for titles."
"sorry." you try to remain professional with your response, fingers dancing wildly across your keyboard. your eyes flicker up to the clock in the top corner, realizing it's well into the night. "didn't expect a response so late. have a good night, lieutenant."
you're ready to throw your phone out of the nearest window out of sheer embarrassment, but you stop when you feel another buzz come through. your stomach flips.
"johnny. you usually stay up late?" he texts, drawing the conversation out much to your surprise. "it's 3:30 in the morning."
"my day's been so boring," you decide to lean into the more casual chat, hoping to find a softer side to your boss. you should feel disgusted, repulsed, put off. he was double your age and then some. but dear god, his attention on you was hypnotizing even if it was just words on a screen. "hoping to waste some time before tomorrow comes. lots of training."
johnny's reply takes a suspiciously long time to come through, his bubble appearing and disappearing. just before you thought you lost the conversation, a photo comes through. johnny's laying in bed, hair ruffled and shirtless. his eyes have a soft, pleading look to them and his lips are curled into a pretty smile. the tiniest glimpse of his chest tattoo pokes through the bottom of the image, and you had to make a conscious effort to swallow your drool and close your jaw. you almost don't notice the text attached.
"maybe i could waste your time?"
you choke on your saliva, glancing off to the corner of your room as if an invisible camera was perched there. this man held zero shame, that much was true. you suppose it's from his age. there's only so much time in one life, so he's seizing every moment. it terrified you, to the depths of your core.
"i don't follow," you text back, playing dumb. this was genuinely unbelievable to you, you needed to hear more from his perspective to make sure you weren't actually dreaming or reading too far into his offer.
"come on, girl," he teasingly responds. "don't play dumb. i may be old, but i'm still sharp." another photo slides into the chat, the same idea s his previous one but now fully displaying his torso. his broad chest with his name painted on it was now boldly on display. his hand laid flirtatiously on his abs, fingers spread out. at the very bottom, you could make out the beginning of a thick tent in his pajama pants. it was like every inch of this man was maximized. you'd seen his shirtless form in his old movies, but seeing it now... it was personal. that photo was for you. "i know you're still fucking with me. i see how you look at me." you bite your lip, wondering if maybe sonya was sharing the other side of the bed. your stomach churns.
"i mean..." you leave the text at that, rapidly typing and deleting. you're not quite sure what to say, how to carry this now heated conversation. you'd never... had to before. "if i may state the obvious, you're... older. and my boss. and married."
his replies stop for a good couple minutes. you wonder if maybe he was regretting his advance. you hoped not.
"is it something that you'd mind?" johnny asks, hesitation in his words as he breaks away from his flirty comments. his question makes you ponder. you were a virgin at your age, holding onto this trait longer than almost everyone at a similar age to you. work was your priority, never giving yourself enough time for a serious commitment. but here you were. johnny was throwing something onto the table that you never expected to happen. were you going to pass this up and stay a virgin forever? hell, no!
"sent you my location. let's try something new, lieutenant."
"johnny." he corrects you one final time before falling completely silent on his end. your stomach twists and churns wildly, realizing you have opened the flood gates to a hookup with your boss. you throw your pajamas off and replace them with a cuter, coordinating pair. you brush your teeth again and try to fix your hair into a neater updo, not impacted by the friction of your pillowcase. shoes and various discarded belongings are shoved under the bed and into the closet. you hadn't had male company, well, ever. you had to come off as somewhat decent for him.
jesus christ, your mind grows dizzy. you were going to lose your virginity, now, or in however long it takes for him to arrive at you apartment. you're not far from work, and even still the time it took for you to hear footsteps in the hallway must have been a century at the minimum. you were seriously going through with this because it was about damn time you enjoyed yourself and spiced shit up.
the heavy footsteps come to a halt, the shadow overtaking the faint hallway light glowing. a part of you wants to hide, maybe jump out of your fire exit. your nerves were blinding, and taking the steps to the entrance felt like an olympic sport. that is, until a new text appears.
"let me inside."
do you open the door? leaning against it, you can smell his musk just through the crack alone. damn his hypnotic... everything. if you open the door, his entire career, marriage, and life could be over. that is, if you spill. you wouldn't.
keeping shit a secret fits you like a glove.
you slowly open the door, hand frozen on the doorknob as you're met with your boss towering over you with a heavy look in his eyes. it's hard to avoid his own hesitation too, but his hard breathing betrays his morals. he looks ready to pounce at any given moment. johnny's mouth opens first, but you beat him to it.
"i'm a virgin," you blurt, mind too empty to feel embarrassed at the fact. you felt the need to tell him now, before he was on top of you and you laid there like a fool.
johnny's brows raise up ever so slightly. "what?"
the heat of the admittance catches up to you, and you twiddle with the hem of your shorts. you repeat yourself meekly, letting the predicament set in between the two of you.
"that's..." he trails off, glancing into your room. "um."
"i'm sorry-" your face heats up, your eyes pricking with tears at the awkward air. "i just... i didn't want you to be surprised, because i don't know what i'm doing."
something new stirs in johnny's core as he understands the weight of the situation. his fists clench and he takes a lumbering step toward you. you back up on instinct.
"that's alright," he purrs, voice hitting a new low, one that's far away from his professional volume. "'cause i'll take care of you. i've got you."
he stands up straight, scratching the back of his neck.
"if you'll have me... i guess that speaks for itself. i'm here, aren't i?"
you nod with a nervous chuckle. your bodies move in sync as you figure out where to put your hands. they settle on his neck, wrapping your arms around him to pull him in. his hands hold your waist. jesus, his hands are big. you'd kissed before, so this is familiar territory.
"i'll take that as a yes," his eyes flick to your lips, visibly restraining himself from fully taking advantage of you. he leans in for a tender kiss, your lips and his moving together. it turns heated quick, with his tongue darting out to get a taste of your mouth which you accept gratefully.
johnny's hands trail down to your ass, cupping the underside as if his hands were destined to fit there. he tugs upward, and you understand what he's trying to do. you jump up and break the kiss momentarily so your legs trap his waist. in between make out sessions, you guide him through your apartment to the bedroom. his lips taste bitter like alcohol but cleanly sweet. exactly how you imagined.
your mind is hazy with lust, your pussy clenching around nothing as you envision taking a monster like him for the first time. a part of you wonders if it's even possible. instead of throwing you onto the mattress, he lowers you like a princess, supporting your head and back with each hand which does nothing to help your aching wetness pooling between your legs.
johnny's lips dive to your jaw, sucking and biting tenderly. you wince, but replace the noise with a lustful gasp as he soothes the pain with his hot tongue. you want to clench your thighs together to relieve the throbbing pressure, but johnny's hands pry your legs open as his hips fit perfectly between them. like a forbidden puzzle piece. you feel his cock rub through your pajamas, and your mouth gathers drool.
johnny finds any possible plush flesh of your neck to take in, kissing wetly as he gently ruts into you, not even realizing he's doing it. he needed to explore every inch of this new body, this new lover... his mistress.
if you were to start praying for forgiveness, it'd be now. you internally cursed sonya for getting her hands on him before you could. your chest burned with jealousy and desire. he was so evilly delicious, and every inch of him needed to be inside before you'd start sobbing. your hands fly forward and tug him forward by his waistband.
"need you," is the most you can coherently ask for, blinded by your horniness. johnny pulls away from your collar, panting in your face. he can't bring himself to look directly in your eyes, your wet, pleading eyes.
"you..." he swallows thickly, brows knitting together. he frowns. "you can't tell anyone. you know that, right?''
you nod with a small whine. you wanted him to just shut up and fuck you.
"hhh - won't say anything," you huff back, gliding your dampened bottoms across his dick with need. he groans, and buries his head in your neck, a deep sigh sending goosebumps across you skin.
"atta girl..."
so hit me up when you feel down i'll make your ass stay 'til sundown i understand what you've been through 'cause I'm a sorry sucker too i know you're scared and that's alright just let me love you for the night
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conspicuous-clown-car · 2 months
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okay so, let me make it 100% clear, I DO NOT SUPPORT DISNEY OR ANY OTHER COMPANY THAT GIVES MONEY TO IS-NOT-REAL OR SUPPORTS THE GENOCIDE.
i get that giving positive attention to anything disney related could cause someone who doesnt care about the boycott to give disney their money BUT GUESS WHAT!! I CANT STOP WHAT OTHER PEOPLE DO!!! AND INSIDE OUT 2 IS ALREADY POPULAR AS FUCK
so think whatever you want about me, ive wasted enough mental energy stressing over one person, im tired. im gonna blorbo post. dont like? block.
in the words of an anon, im going to enjoy that weird little orange Thang to my hearts content, thank you, free Palestine
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anyways im gonna ramble about her, spoilers below ig
Anxiety's anxiety attack gave me a visceral reaction and literally made me cry because of how similar it was to how i experience anxiety/panic attacks, and i just relate to her so much in general with her planning and obsession to be perfect and in control. i also really appreciate how she wasnt seen as a fully "bad" emotion either, and that sometimes anxiety can be necessary and helpful. i just really enjoy her as a character because when i was younger it was rare to see anxiety/panic attacks in kids movies, and at that time i was dealing regular and debilitating anxiety/panic attacks and severe anxiety in general, like to the point that i was agoraphobic. it made me wish i had this movie when i was a kid to know i wasn't broken, but it makes me happy that kids have this movie now. but yea anxiety is a comfort character now, i will literally MAKE a plushie of her if i get more obsessed with her
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hwsing · 6 months
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I’m very curious about any NSFW Headcanons/takes you have for Canada. 👀
sex, eh?
notes: 18+, reader is gender neutral and i don’t think reader’s genitals are mentioned. includes: canada (matthew williams). as always, reblogs are appreciated!
cw: this is more babbling than anything else; verse! matthew, outdoors sex, hair pulling, dick description. wc: about 580. not proof read. not much comes to mind for this lad but please feel free to request anything about him!
it’s so interesting to me that so many people want this man because he is so unfuckable to me its hilarious. i have to really put on my thinking cap here, but, i do think matthew is genuinely quite a giving partner. i also get the impression of him that he does like to dom (soft dom lets be clear). its a bit of a stereotype these days i think, but he seems like the type to enjoy that sort of dynamic since he can often feel overlooked in his day to day life.
despite that, i feel like he has iffy feelings on brats. he’s not the most kinky guy out there to begin with, so declining/training/ god forbid punishing is a ways outside his comfort zone. he’d much prefer to just make you feel good. now, if you reallllllly want to experiment in the more brat side of things, he’ll try a bit, but again, don’t expect anything particularly hardcore. at best, he’ll be manhandling you. when it comes to how he touches you, though, he’d rather give you sweet, open mouthed kisses down your chest to stomach!
really really really likes when his hair is tugged on. whether it it’s when you’re kissing or he’s giving you head, he just loves the little tugs to his roots. it’s a bit grounding, really; the blond is prone to overthinking and getting lost in his own thoughts. in a way, you’re yanking him back down, forcing him to focus more on the here and now.
public sex is a no go, but… outdoors sex?? this is by no means a habit of his, but if you two are camping……….. he prefers to camp by your own means rather than just. use an overcrowded campsite, so it’s not like anyone is really going to be around. with the thick forest as your walls of protection, why not get up to a bit of fun? he honestly really likes it, even if you’re only willing to do it inside the tent. although, if you’re willing to fuck against a tree, he’s more than happy to oblige!
he’s got pretty good stamina. he’s worked in the outdoors most of his life — he’s very fit. not particularly bulking, but muscular and somewhat lean. eats a good diet too. he lasts quite a while to begin with, but can go a few rounds as well! usually caps off at max two though, unless you specifically ask for more. he has a hard time saying no to you in most contexts,, he can’t help it, he thinks you’re so cute :(
still a verse at the end of the day, and if you try to take the reigns, he’s not going to put up much of a fight. again, he has a hard time denying you; quite literally putty in your hands if you decide to dom.
i dont imagine him very noisy in the bedroom. mostly soft and small moans and groans, some whimpering when he’s close. he’s not silent but not talkative either. he’s inclined to sing your praises and all that, but quietly, only for you to hear. that, and he can get a bit embarrassed by speaking so intimately, so it’s just easier for him to say it softly lolol.
this feels kinda bland so here’s a small treat: i’d guess he’s about 6.8”, trims quite close and very hygienic. slightly thick but not so much so that it’s pose a problem. very sensitive.
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nothorses · 9 months
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hello am nonbinary 👍 i think a lot of binary trans people fail to recognize the ways they ignore or erase or are unaware of nonbinary trans issues. we are... like, rebinarized, either treated the same as transmale/transfemale or as cismale/cisfemale, when neither of those experiences are accurate or similar to ours (generalizing here, i know transmasc and transfem enbies Exist lol). i dont feel like exorsexism is taken seriously amongst binary trans people.
like... so many nonbinary people talk about having to lie and pretend to be binary trans to endocrinologists to get access to hrt, or not being able to access hrt BECAUSE of their nonbinary transition goals. but when i bring this up, my nonbinary perspective is often overrode in favor of a binary trans perspective (like, "well the gatekeeping hurts binary trans people too, youre not unique"). does that make sense? if i talk about how i feel about the english language's intense gendering and how it will never be possible for me to be "stealth", how i feel like im forcibly recloseted bc of rigidly binary gender roles and will likely die like this, im told that "everyone deals with misgendering". every time i try to talk about something specific to my own experience as a nonbinary trans person, it is derailed
i dont think "binary privilege" is like. a real thing. bc thats not what the word "privilege" means. but there is A Real Difference in how binary trans people are treated vs nonbinary trans people. its like, we should talk about that for the same reason why we talk abt the differences in transandrophobia and transmisogyny. and idk, in my experience, binary trans people dont usually want to talk about that?
I 100% agree, and I think it's a real problem. And I want to be clear that I agree with everything you've said here; I think there is absolutely a real difference in how nonbinary people are treated vs. other trans people, and I think other trans people very often do treat nonbinary folks differently in a way that is genuinely shitty and harmful.
I think we're on the same page about this one, tbh. I'm a little tired of the idea of "binary privilege", but generally for the same reasons that I think "trans male privilege" is nonsense, and that "transandrophobia" as a concept exists without implying that transmascs are oppressed by transfems.
I just think that not everything is an oppression/privilege dynamic, and it's important to be able to talk about unique experiences and lateral aggression without that conversation centering around arguments about who has it "worse", who's perspectives aren't to be trusted, who's problems aren't real, and which other trans people are the Real Enemy. Which it sounds like you agree with.
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