#why am I being so dramatic

[bassguitarinablackt-shirt]

titans curse was like the only book i cried i think 😭😭

i. i had moments reading lightning theif and sea of monsters where i wanted to cry but....so far titans curse is the only one that has succeeded in bringing tears from my eyes.

[sp0o0kylights]

Grass is green, water is wet, and Jonathan Byers does not like Steve Harrington.

These are known facts in the universe.

Computers were going to take over the world, a “mobile” phone was being invented, and Steve Harrington had lost most of his hearing.

These were unknown facts--rumors even, if you will. Eddie had never seen even a grain of truth to support any of them. 

(Well, maybe the computer thing, but only because Grant and Dustin both had made a couple of convincing arguments.) 

So he doesn’t think about it, when his freshman gang up on him. 

Doesn’t even factor the “can’t hear well” thing in, when he was tasked (demanded, whined, bitched and moaned at) with helping them explain to Steve why going to the release party of the new D&D box set, located at a hobby store only a mere 2 hour drive away, was important.

Eddie’s not even sure how the little shits got him to agree to do it until he’s standing in the parking lot in front of the former King himself. 

“The store’s leading up to the release with a handful of one-shots.” He’s explaining, unsure whether to pull out the bored act or play up his court jester persona, and thus mixing and matching on the fly. 

He does not care if Harrington doesn’t know what a one-shot is. 

“They’re releasing the set at midnight. You have to be there to get it though, you can’t have someone else pick it up for you because they only got a certain amount in.” 

Harrington’s frowning (no surprise) but it’s not until Eddie is well into his spiel about how his van is already full with the elder members of Hellfire, and thus has no room for the freshmen, that he realizes Steve isn’t quite looking at him. 

Is in fact, looking over his shoulder.

Eddie stops. Follows Harrington’s gaze.

Parked across from Steve’s Beemer, is Jonathan Byer’s barely working clunker car. 

A handful of steps in front of it, and thus nearly right behind Eddie, is the man himself.

His hands are still moving, mouth shaping words silent as he goes, his gaze locked not on Eddie or the kids--but on Steve. 

Who turns back around as Harrington’s eyes slide right back to him. 

“And this is taking place next Friday?” He says, in that sort of annoyed but resigned way parents aim at their children. “After school?” 

“I’d like to go during  school, but the freshmen insist you wouldn’t let them ditch out.” Eddie tells him. “They had two separate arguments about it.” 

Loud ones, that had interrupted the game and given Eddie a migraine. 

Once again Steve’s eyes slide away from him, to Jonathan. 

“They’re not skipping school.” He says suddenly, a glare forming and Jonathan makes an annoyed noise. 

“They argued about skipping, they’re not going to.” He says aloud, and finally steps up so that he’s next to Eddie instead of behind him. 

“Munson slow down, I can’t sign as fast as you’re talking.” He adds, in the hang-dog grumble he’s notorious for. 

Eddie stares at him. 

“Can he seriously not hear me?” 

“No.” Steve and Jonathan answer together. 

“I can kind of still hear,” Steve adds, gaze returning to Eddie’s face. “But its more loud music or noises. I can lip read, but you’re also talking too fast for that.” 

Without pausing, he turns back to Jonathan and says; “Why can’t you take them?”

“It’s Friday.” Byers deadpans. 

Eddie’s not an expert on sign language, but his hands somehow looked deadpan too. 

He’s not sure how Jonathan did that. 

“So?” Steve snarks back. 

What follows is an argument that Eddie is not, at all involved in, mostly because he’s too busy handling the fact that Jonathan Byers has learned sign language, for Steve Harrington, apparently, and given the tone the argument is taking they still don’t even like each other.  

Eventually the argument ends, Steve throwing his hands in the air and demanding that Jonathan owes him. 

(Eventually Eddie will corner the ever so quiet Will Byers and ask why the hell his brother learned sign language for someone he clearly fucking hates.

“Oh they don’t hate each other.” Baby Byers would say, in that shy, quiet way of his. “I think they’re actually friends now?” 

“You think?”

“Well--you’ve seen them.” Will shrugs. “I think being mean to each other is kinda their thing.” 

‘What the hell.’ Eddie would think, right up until he stumbled across one of the kids sign language books. 

Byers the Elder, he decides, isn’t the only person who should learn sign language to chew out Harrington properly.

The pay off is immediate. 

Or at least, the pay off of watching Steve’s shocked face the first time Eddie signs something vulgar at him is, anyway.)

[radioactive-dazey]

WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT VIRGIL'S (thomas's) EYES?

THEYRE SO PRETTY

I have thought about his eyes once a day every day for the last 12 days. I can't get it out of my head. Fuck man

Yall see it too right??

[its-your-mind]

HEY. HEY.

HEY @re-dracula WHAT GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO HAVE JONATHAN ACTUALLY READING THAT PASSAGE OUT LOUD BEHIND SEWARD DESCRIBING THE SCENE, HUH? WITH THE TEARS IN HIS VOICE AND THE PAUSING AND THE SHORT LITTLE INHALES AND THE VOICE CRACKS? WAS IT TRULY NECESSARY??? I WAS ALREADY CRYING. I DIDN'T NEED THIS TOO. WHAT THE FUCK.

[natelia-aldelliz]

Guys imagine, Roach died, before the creation of 141, but Soap is able to see his ghost. He was originally following Ghost around, really annoyed that he was using his death as an excuse to not get close to anyone, but when he found out Soap could see him and talk to him he started following him around instead.

And they get really close, like two peas in a pod, except they have to be discreet about it because no one else can see or hear Roach, and they'd think Soap was crazy if they saw him talking to no one.

They use that for shenanigans too: Roach will go follow someone else and report back to Soap, Gaz is genuinely starting to believe Soap has superpowers or something. It's really useful on missions as well, and Soap managed to successfully rescue team members thanks to Roach being able to move through walls and everything.

(Roach is not the only ghost Soap is able to see btw, just the only one he's talking to.)

And then Roach is witnessing his past lover trying really hard to not fall in love with Soap, and Soap trying really hard to not do anything about the love he already feels, and he has to try and convince Soap that he is dead. During that conversation he finds out that something else that keeps Soap from doing something is that he feels very confused about everything because he also has feeling for Roach.

So now Roach has to try and convince him that even if he was still alive he wouldn't have a problem with that. He's known for a while that he was polyamorous, but he hadn't really dared talking to Ghost about that because he thinks he's jealous and possessive.

And Soap is like "oh yeah, you want me to go say to Ghost 'don't worry about your dead lover that I'm not supposed to know, he's actually polyamorous and also in love with me, I know because his ghost told me!' ??? I'm sure he's gonna take that well!"

But Roach is nothing if not resourceful and he manages to put Soap in situations where he's forced to interact with Ghost, and eventually they kiss and their relationship is beginning to be something. They're not really sure what.

And Roach is sad, because he has to watch the two men he loves being in love without him, yes, but at least they're both happy, and it makes him feel a bit better. And then during a mission Ghost almost dies.

Because he was alone and Soap and Gaz were together, Roach was following Ghost this time, ready to fly to Soap in an instant if there was any problems. But there was and he didn't have time, so he instinctively grabbed the gun being pointed towards Ghost's head and moved it as the person was shooting, saving Ghost's life, giving him enough time to shoot the enemy himself.

But even as the threat is eliminated, Ghost is still looking up from where he's on the ground, staring right through him, looking shocked. No, not right through him, he realises when he moves to the side and Ghost's eyes follow him. He also realises that he grabbed the gun. He's never grabbed anything before, in all his years of being a ghost.

Then suddenly Ghost's eyes move wildly around, and he figures he disappeared from his view. He can still go through the walls, but he's kept the ability to grab stuff when he wants. It gives him a ton of new possibilities, to fuck with people and, of course, to touch Soap.

"I wish you were actually alive," Soap whispers to him, holding his hands against his face as he's falling asleep.

"What the fuck," comes Ghost's voice the next morning, waking both of them up - wait, since when could Roach sleep?

Soap doesn't understand immediately, because he's always been able to see Roach. But Ghost is standing in the door, looking straight at dead past lover.

Turns out Soap is a necromancer and he had no idea, though the whole 'I can see dead people' should probably have told him sooner that he wasn't normal... The more he wishes Roach is alive, the more he actually is. And they all end up happy and together. And Gaz is very happy to have won the bet that Soap indeed has superpowers.

The day Roach says, in a wondering voice, "I... I think I'm hungry" is the day they understand that something is really happening and he's actually coming back to life.

(Also, Soap has no control at all on his abilities, he has no idea what does what and why, he knows nothing. No one knows.)

[poppinspops]

Ummm, not me being DRAGGED back into the descendants' fandom kicking and screaming.

My poor friends that have to hear me rant abt descendants.. sorry yall, my bad

[odericevertz]

people where is the ARSENAL FIC. i am starved of content. talk to me about your wips and your snippets and your ideas

[ruthytwoshakes]

sick as horse. Going to die. See you all in. , hell. I am goign to get water now goodbye.

If soldier tf2 was sick I think he would curl into a little ball and shiver all alone in the cold. That is too sad, no, somebody would find him and bring him some soup. AND a blanket. yeaajhh

[inwhichitumbl]

Really struggling to just enjoy being in my new shiny fandom right now because it all feels so toxic. I can't form an opinion about LFj because I don't dare look anything about him up with the way things are, and I don't have enough from the show to really form an attachment to Tommy as a character. I find him incredibly difficult to read on screen, which is on me. I just can't get a fix on who Tommy is.

I so want to enjoy Buck's story in canon, and be happy about bi Buck (and I am!). But I can't go into the tags because there's so much vitriol being thrown around. I would really like to just find a little corner where Buck/Tommy and Buck/Eddie fans are just getting along and speculating about next season and having a fun hiatus thinking how broken Eddie Diaz is and how much he loves his son. And Buck going out on dates with Tommy, or the firefam all hanging out. Is there a secret tag where everyone is just getting along?

And this isn't even about shipping buddie. The existence of Buck/Tommy does nothing to lessen the connection between Buck and Eddie for me. Their relationship is so strong, even just as friends. Like, I'll happily read super intense Buck+Eddie fics just about how much they love each other without it being romantic or about sex (hi, have you met me, I'm ace). They're each other's person whatever that looks like.

And whether Buck stays with Tommy or not for however long in S8, I just hope that it gets to be the story Buck deserves. Because that boy deserves someone who loves him but also will let him be his ridiculous golden retriever self without suppressing that urge and will lift him up but also be there to support him when he needs it.

And I hope that Eddie manages to properly process his grief and maybe spends some time single and healing rather than diving in to relationships too quickly searching for that nuclear family he thinks he needs. I just have a lot of emotions about Eddie Diaz ok.

[martini-with-a-lizzard]

If captain Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce can do surgery all through the night in the middle of a war zone then I can write a single goddam essay without crying.

[cosmicallysick]

The trauma wasn’t that bad, so why does it hurt so much? How did I end up so fucked up off such small shit?

[maxgicalgirl]

Oh Cecil Palmer I would be delighted if you were always right next to me only inches from my face mwah xoxo

[fuckdamn]

everytime i’m faced with wild overt misogyny that’s just platformed like it’s nothing i remind myself that people don’t actually have to feel this way about women. men are fully capable of treating women like human beings and viewing them as such. “but socialization but male fantasies but patriatchy speaks through us even when we don’t recognize it” sure but actually regardless there exist men who are fundamentally not raging misogynists and they generally seem happier and better adjusted. misogyny to me isn’t disappointing because “oh i can’t believe Men, as an essentialized category of person, are like this” it’s disappointing because people make the choice to be like this. “it’s my biological imperative as a man to dominate you” okay well it’s my biological imperative as a freaky bitch to dominate you so what now. what biological imperative is making you comment “onlyfans detected opinion rejected” on every picture of any attractive woman. i think i will always be understood by most people as a woman and i’m learning to accept that and trying to like it but misogyny makes me feel very trapped of course. but misogyny is a choice. which means some people make the choice to be misogynistic which is profoundly frustrating. but many other people choose not to be actively misogynistic and i believe anyone could choose not to be actively misogynistic if they wanted. so it’s a whole thing

[hamartia-grander]

so my general paranoia has always been pretty bad (hi ocd) but I thought it was more manageable the past few years as I've matured and gotten better at catching myself before I spiral, but recently (as in the past three weeks or so) it's been so bad that I do things impulsively as I'm spiralling without even realising it and it's been negatively affecting the way I perceive how friends think of me which I do NOT want to start happening again because that sucked. Idk why it's happening but I'd be grateful for any advice idrk what else to say about it.

[jadelemonadee]

sometimes i wish we could block people on youtube in general and not just from our channels because there’s this one person who is subbed to me who’s a little too hostile towards seabury fans and its lowk scaring me 😭😭😭 leave us alone vro

[yuseirra]

woke up really early in the morning and I'm drawing...I get really sentimental at dawn, allow me to just drabble away...

In my opinion, the character Kamiki is one of two extremes:

Either he is extraordinarily evil, or he is extraordinarily kind...

Looking at the story, Ai was protecting that person by risking everything—her own happiness (she wanted to be with this person forever), even putting her career in danger. She took everything upon herself, saying she couldn't give up because those children were hers with that person, and she decided to raise them.

In that case, it’s the latter. No, it really has to be the latter because I’m not bad at psychological analysis, you know? At least up to the point when they broke up, that really was his personality. I thought, "Huh? What is this?" and after that, I really watched closely, and I even managed to predict what he's actually done. I DID THAT.

I’ve never been a mother, but from a mother’s perspective, there’s this natural instinct to protect and care for one’s children, right? Especially if there’s affection for them. I'm not all about maternal love is absolute, or something like that, what I'm coming from is that, if you have children, unless you're a really terrible parent, you want good things for them and YOU are the one that shields them from harm, and watch over them and all... You get these sorts of feeling when you look at little kids who aren't your own as well, if they ARE your own, I feel like that protective, loving affection would only increase.

But Ai asked her CHILDREN a favor to help their dad. This means... her feelings for her boyfriend were as powerful compared to her feelings as a mother, you know? The fact that she, as a mother, is counting on her children to aid him... it means it was a very strong desire, something she deeply wished for. It even...I don't think it's the perfect word but overwrites? makes her set aside her feelings as a mother if it means she can help the guy. She loves him so much. THAT MUCH. He's really someone she loves and wants to tend to. She couldn't give up on him... It also means that she trusts him that much as well because why make her own kids get close to someone who can be dangerous?

Given this, I think it’s not just highly likely, but practically certain that Ai’s boyfriend was an exceptionally good person.

For someone to evoke such deep feelings in Ai, they can’t be ordinary. Ai had a strong distrust of people, you know. She was very wary.

Kamiki... there’s something about him... When he talks, it feels like he’s accommodating others to an excessive degree, suppressing his own emotions and enduring while being considerate of others. That’s what I sensed.

Just like Ai had her own pent-up frustrations but still smiled, this character seems to be doing the same thing. He has no inner monologue when he appears in the present, so it’s hard to fully grasp his thoughts, but he must be in pain. If you look at the flashbacks, it’s clear he used to be, but like Ai, he doesn’t show it on the surface, which leads to misunderstandings.

After hearing his voice, I’m even more convinced;

This person seems like an exceptionally good person. Could he really be capable of doing something bad? I get the feeling he’s exactly the kind of person Ai would choose... Ai truly risked everything for him. She gave all her heart to this one person and I feel THAT'S why she was happy about having their children as well.

I believe this character would absolutely do the same for Ai and their children. I’m pretty sure I’m right. I keep looking at him, and the way he acts is very sweet. He doesn't have to be that way, but that behavior is consistent... this really gets to me, it's so contradictory to the accusations he's been faced so I end up talking about a lot because I keep seeing things. Is this guy REALLY evil? I guess it'll be sorted out soon but I'd even go as far as to say that he could have really done.. nothing so wrong... anyhow Ai really loves him. That's really endearing... and if he's what I think he is, he really is someone who can deserve that.. everything clicks to me if he is!!!! I won't have a clue on what's up with all this if he isn't!!

It's a bit late to say this, but my favorite type is "someone whose heart is so generous that they sometimes suffer losses, but they accept it with a broad understanding."

It’s not about a specific character; that’s just the kind of person I consider my ideal type...

I sometimes wonder, "Am I reading the character this way because I want them to be like that?" But honestly, I didn’t really have any thoughts like that until I read chapters 152-154.

I can recognize characters like this when I see them. I’m serious... because I always have them as my favs. (I'm still being really cautious regarding this guy but I see signs of him being this way)

I understand why Ai liked this character so much if that's the case then. It’s because such a person is incredibly rare and a gift to the world...You want to protect these types of people, preserve them, and help them out. I feel like that's what she wanted to do for him.

At this point, I want to think "Whatever happens, happens." I really need to stop thinking so much about this subject, it's a comic and it's all about having fun, but..

That character, in my opinion, is one of two things:

Either they’re a psychopath who's been acting all along, or they’re a total pushover, someone with an unusually high threshold for anger, drowning in self-doubt, who keeps enduring without being able to express their rage.

Both are extreme to the point of being inhuman, but I think it’s the latter. I really believe it’s the latter...

and it's stressful seeing that kind of person being misunderstood if he is you know!! I think this is it though!! Because Ai wants to protect him with all her might and I get that if he's really like this!!