#you get the gist im sure you know what part im talking about

[risingsunresistance]

[moonrisecoeur]

IM BACK CUZ IM MENTALLY UNWELL OK. and yes you’re the best sub Leon writer 😏🥱 and yes I liked it, SITTING ON HIS FACE? 😍🥱

I’m so sorry for blasting ur req box but YOURE AN ACTUALLY GOOD SUB LEON WRITER SO can you blame me? concept: idk why but re4 Leon is so free use coded and so imagine he is on a mission with a new assigned partner but she’s an asshole to him (“fuck off man, I can do it myself, “I don’t need your help”, “you’re too nice and gonna be taken advantage of 😐”, etc. You get the gist) and his goofy ass just tryna be nice and helpful, cuz this is leon we are talking about. But the fun part ⁉️ they have cameras installed in the hideout they are saying at for security purposes. But ofc, Leon always tries to check on reader to make sure she’s ok - even if she’s an asshole to him. AND YK WHAT READER DOES 😭 she’s way too horny and just goes at it, girl got a masturbation problem on god. Every night. One night - wrong time and place - Leon opens his laptop to see the cameras making sure she’s ok AND HELP HE SEES HER … yk. And he feels guilty like he shouldn’t watch but he does anyways. And this goes on for weeks. Until one night he’s sick and tired of her always being so mean and he accidentally lets it slip that he’s been watching her LOL AND SHES LIKE UHM BOY WHAT 🙄⁉️ and he tries to play it off like “I didnt mean to” but like, my brother in Christ… you’ve been watching every night for weeks 🤨 wdym you didn’t mean to? ANYWAYS LONG STORY SHORT SHE PUNISHES HIM AND HEAVYYYY ON THE FREE USE THING. Love you bae 😘

i made a couple minor changes just for convenience :) fem reader she/her pronouns!

also i didn’t write the smex scene IM SORRY but i have been working on this all day and i need to get to other asks but i promise i’ll write some more free use in the future because it’s so smexy

-

"look, i know you don't like me-"

"oh? really? tell me what you think you know, kennedy," you scowl at him, and though it spooks him just a little, he tries to seem unphased.

he frowns, not hurt by your words but definitely concerned that you'll make a bad partner, "you don't need to be this hostile. we're allies. we're supposed to have each other's backs."

"right..." your voice echos, and leon knows that if it came down to it, you wouldn't protect him, wouldn't save him, would barely help him. he's practically on his own for this mission, just has an extra body with him to shoot at the bad guys.

it hurts, to some degree, because even without knowing you well, and even with you being cold and rude to him, he knows he'd come to your rescue in a heartbeat. something about him feels fond of you, even though in your entire time knowing leon kennedy, you haven't said one nice thing to him.

he thinks that maybe he likes that you've never been nice to him. he doesn't really know what to do with that thought.

-

leon is proved wrong.

despite the harshness of your words, you come to his rescue, fighting off the villager who almost decapitated him with an axe like both of your lives depend on it (because they do).

he watches you fight nervously, but when you come out on top, aside from the gash wound you take to the hip, he feels his heart skip a beat.

"this is what happens when you hurt my partner," you groan, holding your side, trying to speak through the pain even though leon can see the blood seeping between your fingers.

you whisper something in your victim's ear, something leon can't quite make out, before you kill him. leon wonders what it was briefly. he decides it doesn’t matter.

you both breathe a sigh of relief, but it's short lived as you collapse to the ground. you saved him. you got hurt saving him.

"here, let me help you," he mutters, coming over to you, not even stopping to ask if you want his help because he knows you'll say no, "stop fighting me. you're hurt and i need to patch you up."

the pain is agonizing, but even through gritted teeth and tense breaths, you push through it. he has to commend you a little bit, you're tougher than you look.

but when you try to push his hand away, claiming "i'm fine, kennedy," he sees the struggle in your face, hears the hurt in your voice. his heart seems to stop. he's worried, "i can do it myself, you don't have to- fuck, dude, i don't need your help-."

"-just relax, okay? i got you..”

you don't have the strength to push him away, but you know you shouldn't anyway, so you just slouch back against the wall and try to breathe, "fine, just fuckin... hurry up."

"i'm just trying to take care of you. we're partners, right? i gotta look out for you," he smiles, trying to lighten the mood even slightly. he wishes that this would be the time the barriers come down, that those skyscraper walls that prevented him from coming any closer to you emotionally could come crashing down, if only for a moment.

"you don't have to do anything. you're choosing to put yourself in danger to help me," you groan as you lean back, looking up at the ceiling, "suprised that no one's tried to take advantage of your willingness to help before."

"someone did," he mutters annoyedly, focusing more on the wound then it being your wound, on your body. his eyebrows, almost naturally furrowed from years of stress, somehow make his face even more sad to gaze upon. it's not that he's unattractive, far from it, but he's... worn. tired. a piece of your heart, no matter how far you keep away from him, aches in sympathy.

-

leon carries you back to the safe room, a hideout you both are using to rest and recover in while you plot your next move. he lays his jacket on the ground to at least give you something comfortable to lie on. you don't look comfortable, but he can't do anything else to help you.

he looks through his things, trying to concoct something that will at least make you feel a little bit better. he finds a first aid spray, and his heart jumps out of his chest in excitement. he uses it to take care of your wound, and waits for you to wake up from your unconscious state.

he decides to go back out, hoping to maybe find some other things to help you both on your mission. he knows you'll berate him for leaving on his own, risking his own life needlessly. but god if he didn't imagine what it would be like if he found something you could really use, and watch your eyes light up. even if you didn't like him, you'd be happy. he wants to see you smile, to praise him for a job well done.

he cringes at how pathetic it sounds, but he sets off either way, leaving you wrapped in his jacket with a note from him saying what he's doing.

-

he doesn't do it intentionally. at least... not the first time. genuinely, he just wanted to check up on you, make sure you were alive and breathing and safe. and you definitely were.

he doesn't know why its so hypnotizing, why he can't put his goddamn phone away with the stupid security app on it. of course it's you, though. you're hypnotizing.

he watches every pixel, every distorted view of you touching yourself in the safe room, obviously unaware that he could... see this. he's glad there's no audio, or else he'd be unable to control himself, even in an abandoned building surrounded by zombies. maybe its the years that haven hardened him, burned the fear out of his soul and numbed him to the presence of those things, but he doesn't feel anything but uncontrollable desire right now.

have you been doing it the whole time? you both had spilt off from each other multiple times, and he would almost be upset at the idea that every time he was fighting for his life and barely, barely winning that fight each time, you were getting off a couple hundred feet from him in another room... if it wasn't so fucking hot to watch you masturbate.

he keeps watching until he notices that you're having an orgasm, body twitching and your chest heaving up and down as you take deep breathes. it's so fucking sexy, leon probably could have cum on the spot if he watched anymore.

-

you keep doing it. he keeps watching it. over the course of the mission (of course he had to be stuck on a long, secluded recon mission with you of all people) he's watched you too many times. he doesn't think he has enough fingers to count how many times, which either means he's been on this mission longer than he thought or you have a fucking addiction. he's almost kind of impressed at how efficient you are. takes you 10 minutes tops, and then you just get back up and keep on trucking? his sentimental, post-nut ass could never.

and, though you recovered from your wound, you haven't displayed any sense of gratitude for leon taking care of you when you passed out after getting hurt. not that he expects it, truthfully. you saved his life, he saved yours. you were even.

he just doesn't feel like he's broken any new ground. he feels like, if anything, you feel even further away, emotionally. he's about had it.

"hey, we need to talk," he says, ominously; he doesn't intend it to be so, "i understand you don't like me. it's fine. i don't even care anymore. but i am tired of you talking to me like i'm a pushover."

you look over at him, reloading your gun with a displeased look on your face. leon hates the inner urge he has to cave and apologize to you, as if his body would rather give up any sense of dignity he still has in favor of being slightly more tolerable to you.

"well? are you going to say something?"

you scoff, looking away, "didn't know you were so fucking sensitive, kennedy," and you turn around, ready to walk out, before he snaps, "this isn't a pleasure trip. sorry you're not having a good time."

"clearly you're having a good time with all the pleasure you're giving yourself while i'm trying not to die."

he stops. panicking. trying to think of how to spin the words he just said and make it not sound like he knew every tell you had when you were about to cum or exactly how you touch yourself in order to get yourself off quickly.

you stop as well. and you look back at him with this expression on your face that is completely unreadable.

maybe it wasn't the best move to reveal the only card he had left to play if it mean he would get this reaction out of you considering that, again, you so clearly do not like him.

... right?

"what... did you say, kennedy?" you ask, pure venom in your voice. it's not a question, you so clearly heard him correctly.

"i- i'm sorry, i didn't mean to say that-"

"have you been watching me?" you take a step closer, eyes boring into his soul so intensely he can't make eye contact. he has no way out of this situation. he feels out of breath, nervous, god why are you getting so close to him? "answer me, leon," not kennedy, leon, "have you been watching me masturbate?"

he looks up, trying to keep himself from making eye contact. he knows the second he looks into your eyes, he will be putty in your hands, free for you to mold into whatever you'd like. he knows you're not looking at him with distain like usual, it's something else.

something hungry.

"yeah," he breathes, barely getting the world out at all. you take a deep breath, as if you're debating what you're going to do.

"what you did was wrong, you see that, right?"

"yes, i know, but-"

you scoff, annoyed. god why in this moment, just inches away from you, you notice the moles on his neck, the angle of his jaw, the entrancing aura of his eyes. it's so damn distracting, and you have to pull yourself together, "but nothing. you watched me without my consent, you got off on it, didn't you?"

"god, you're making it sound so bad, i... i'm sorry, okay? how can i make it up to you?" he asks, trying so damn hard as always to please.

this is where you come to realize that maybe you didn't hate leon kennedy all this time. maybe you found yourself too comfortable, too at ease in his presence. maybe he was safe and sweet and gentle and it didn't sit right because nothing in a world with zombies and bioweapons and cults and parasites was gentle. but leon is.

you look down, considering your options, "i have an idea. you're free to refuse and we go back to before, and you get nothing from me. do you want to hear it?"

"sure?"

you take a breath, going for it, "i’ll be… blunt. if you couldn’t tell, i’m a bit.. insatiable. i need something to get myself off now that i’m getting bored of my own hands out here. you help me, and i’ll forgive you for watching me.”

his thoughts stop. he genuinely can’t put together a coherent thought, what did you mean? "are you.. are you fucking serious? you barely speak to me, every time you do speak to me you act like i'm the scum of the earth, you act like i'm not here when i saved your ass and carried you and patched you up, i-”

you cut him off with a kiss. it’s not gentle, it’s rough and messy and your fingers dig into the skin of his cheeks, leaving him red and breathless. he finally gets it. you don’t want him to help you, you want to use him.

he lets you push him down, pin his body to the wall as you kiss him breathless. he lets you dig your nails into his neck even if it hurts. he lets you touch and kiss him as rough or as gentle as you like. and you don’t like being gentle, clearly.

“use me,” he whispers between kisses, and when you pull away, eyeing him intently, as if urging him to explain himself, he does, “do whatever you want. just keep going until you’re satisfied. don’t… don’t hold back. whatever pleases you… i want that. i want to please you.”

“awh, you just want me to be happy with you, don’t you?” you coo at him, endeared by his selflessness. truly a good man in a bad world, “that’s all you’ve ever wanted, hm? for me to like you?”

his resolve cracks just a little bit more, “uhm, yeah…” he his voice is shaky, unsteady, and he just needs to give in.

“then you’re going to let me do this every single time in horny and need something to get myself off. i’m going to do whatever i want to you, and i’m not going to ask. you’re just going to let me. if you don’t, then we go right back to being enemies, and you really don’t want that, right?”

he stutters aimlessly, his knees going weak. he’d truly be done for if you weren’t hold him up with a strength he did not know you had.

and you just keep going, “i’m not going to ask or care if it’s a bad time. i want it to be inconvenient, uncomfortable, ill-timed. i want it to be permanently in your head that i can have you whenever i want you. that i can do whatever i want to you.”

“only i get to have you, got it?”

“g-got it,” he mutters weakly, feeling your hands on him, touching him in places he hasn’t been touched in a while. he didn’t realize how desperate he was.

“only i get to touch you, only i… get to fuck you.”

he nods helplessly.

“it’s too bad i didn’t bring a dildo in my bag when we set off for this mission, because i would so fuck you with it until you’re seeing stars and apologizing for going behind my back… but i suppose i’ll just have to satisfy myself with your cock…”

[skelliko]

hello everything is fine? I wanted to make a different request, could I make them discovering that y/n has narcissistic personality disorder? thanks!

hii I'm all good :)

sorry if it took a while to write it, I wanted to get the right Information about the disorder and thinking about how they'd react or do was kinda hard. though for clarification i was unsure half of the time on how to write about the disorder since I knew nothing so I'm sorry if there's parts that aren't true.

tbh I contemplated not doing this 1 purely cause I didn't want to offend anyone, if needed to or if anyone asks I will delete this post.

(by the way Im not saying that people with that disorder can never be loved, it can just be a little difficult)

★- Tokyo revengers

featuring: kazutora, chifuyu, Baji

°- Kazutora hanemiya

• he'd hate the lack of emotion and sympathy you'd give him sometimes but would brush it off since he knows he also gets like that

• though sometimes he'd be okay with it, if he's talking about something touchy about him he doesn't want an over-reaction to it. but he still craves that sense of care from you

• would bicker about who's fault is who's, "it's your fault"- "no it's yours!"

• he'd take notice of your self worth and admire you a little for that

• he'd notice your need for attention but then would get confused if you seem to not show much reaction towards it

• he'd hug and keep you company, and give you compliments

• he wouldn't notice at first but once he got the gist of your whole self and analysed you he then soon enough become sceptical of your disorder

• he'd pity you but not say anything of it yet

• if he realises that he's unintentionally made you jealous or envy someone cause he gave his attention to someone else when around you he'd panic a little

• though deep down he likes you jealous cause it shows you still have care of him

• he'd try and show you his care that even despite your disorder he still cares very much about you

• he aware that he has his own problems, sure he's not aware all the time but despite you not showing much emotion or sympathy you still picked him, and he picked you

• he knows that disorders and behaviours like that are sometimes caused by trauma or a type of upbringing, he fully understands that. so he tried to make you open up a little to him but slyly asking you a few minor questions

• whenever he notices you trying to help him or someone else kazutora can't seem to find it amusing since he can tell that whatever your saying won't be helpful

• he'd out of the blue ask you things about your disorder, not even saying that he knows beforehand

• "how do you feel in certain situations? is it actually all plain and numb or is there more to it?"

• in the end you're both considered to be red flags, it just so happens that you both can also understand each other. but if one gets a little out of control you will be separated

°- chifuyu matsuno

• he'd be confused and even a little hurt by your behaviour

• he noticed your struggle and lack of desire to apologize, but he wouldn't hate you for that, he gets that apologizing can sometimes be embarrassing

• but if it's over something major and notices your half-assed apology he'd confront you about that

• he'd get hurt by the lack of sympathy you'd give and when you do show a bit of it he's sceptical of it being fake

• sometimes he'd feel useless in the relationship

• he'd quietly and calmly watch as you fix your hair or do something about your appearance before coming up to you from behind and tell you "you're always pretty"

• he'd realise your need for attention and would shower you with compliments throughout the day without thinking much of it, he actually kind of likes that

• "I like your hair" "that colour suits you" "your amazing at what you do"

• he'd be a bit slow in noticing that sort of thing but once he finally realised and sticks together all the signs of your disorder he seems a little stuck in his mind about it all, cause he knows it always ends up toxic in the end.

• but he also wants to show you that he can still care for you

• he purposely did research about your disorder in hopes of understanding you a lot better

• he'd try to be caring and gentle but it'd wears him out sometimes and even puts pressure himself on

• he didn't want to be an dick and abandon you cause of your issues but he finds it difficult to contain, it's easier to let go than keep it up and have constant worry that he's not doing anything right

°- Baji Keisuke

• there'd be a bit of arguing and he knows that neither of you would back down so Baji always tried to back down first and avoid any arguing or disagreement

• he can be understanding when he first realised that you try so hard to impress others, he'd come up to you about it and reassure that you're already perfect for him

• he'd give you the needed attention that you crave

• he has his boundaries straight and would tell you if you do something that he doesn't like

• on the outside he plays along with your self confidence and agrees but deep down hes holding his tongue back

• it wasn't until the middle of your relationship that he connected the dots to your disorder

• he didn't say anything about It but in his mind he was thinking hard about the relationship between the two of you and the change that had happened half way

• how long would he let it keep up before it started to become toxic?

• whenever your hanging out in a group he'd give you attention by holding your hand or an arm over your shoulders, or if your sat down he'd rest his hand on your thigh

• he's patient with you on the outside but on the inside he isn't

• he'd start to confront you about certain things a lot more but in a calm manner in hopes of that helping you a little but would sometimes get agitated by your lack of care

• despite knowing and experiencing your narcissism he will try to stay with you and make it work but if things start going to the left he'd leave immediately without a doubt

 ♡---

[bruhhhh-huhhhhh]

Bean you're the best dude

So Im on a SB Daycare attendant spree rn because I'm not doing great and mans is comfort characters

Mayyyyyyyyyyyyy I perhaps get just random comfort with the daycare attendant?

FUCK THIS TOOK SO LONG IM SORRY

Daycare Attendant x reader

Comfort

stoppp this gif is literally so cute

Work today had been…rough to say the least. Not even just today, all week you’ve been working your ass off around the daycare and in parts and service, but no matter what happened you always ended up missing something or doing it wrong. 

But, much to your relief, your shift was finally over, so you did what you always did at the end of a shift. You went to go see your boyfriends.

The walk to the daycare was uneventful, other than the fact that a map bot scared the ever loving shit out of you. When you finally got there, you decided to take the fun way down (AKA the slide) and sit in the ball pit for a bit. 

Sun’s sensors went off, indicating that someone had just gone down the slide. So, he did what he always did when someone came down the slide. He came out of his room and looked out before swan diving into the ball pit. Sun maneuvered under the plastic balls, being careful as not to be seen, before picking up the person by scooping his hands under their arms. “Hello! It’s quite late- Oh! Y/N! It’s so lovely to see you!” Sun exclaimed, excited.

“Hey, Sunny. It’s nice to see you too,” you respond, starting to try and wiggle out of his hold. Before you dropped back into the ball pit, however, Sun moved you so that you were being held bridal style.  “Sunny, put me down,” you whined.

“Nope! You worked today, so now you don’t have to do anything too exhausting. Like walking!”

You rolled your eyes but let him continue to carry you all the way to the child’s play area, where he sat you down at one of the mini-tables. He left you there, with a can of Fizzy-Fazz, as he went to grab some paper, coloring books, and crayons. Sun practically ran out, not wanting to make you wait too long. When he got back, he dropped them onto the table. “We’re gonna color now!” he exclaimed, grabbing a coloring book and placing it in front of you. 

For a little while, you two colored and talked about your day. Sun talked about how some of the kids and how they were so well behaved today, and you tried your best to talk about some of the good things about your day.

There weren’t a lot.

“Sunshine, what else happened today? Surely that can’t be everything!” Sun exclaimed. He knew that you always had a busy day, especially if he and Moon did. 

You grimaced a little bit and took a sip of your Fizzy-faz. “Work wasn’t great today, Sunny. I don’t wanna be a bother by dumping it on you two.”

“You aren’t gonna bother us! We’re here to help you, you know. You’re always so nice and gentle when you help with maintenance, and you always come and visit us when you finish a shift. The least we can do is help you out.” Sun sounded very gleeful as he went on and on about how amazing you were.

That rant lasted about 15 minutes before he realized that you hadn’t responded. He looked over at you and saw tears streaming down your face.

“Oh! Y/n, I’m sorry! Are you hurt? Did I upset you?”

“You didn’t upset him, dumbass. The sensors aren’t showing any sense of sadness,” Moon said from inside their shared headspace. 

“Moon! Language!” Sun responded, not realizing that he was talking out loud. 

You let out a small chuckle, already knowing the gist of what Moon said to the animatronic standing in front of you. Sun snapped back to attention and stood up, walking over to your side of the table. He picked you up, again, and gave you a long hug.

“You didn’t upset me, Sunny. It’s just… I really needed to hear that,” you say, your voice slightly muffled.

“I know, Sunshine. But you looked like you needed a hug.” You could hear the tremor in his voice and the way his fans were working harder to cool him down. Sun still wasn’t quite used to initiating affection, so the fact that he did makes him a little more flustered than usual. 

He pulls away for just a second to scoop you up, bridal position, and carry you up to his and Moon’s room. It’s not messy, exactly, but it also isn’t as spotless as the rest of the daycare. There’s a bed in the corner that the boys got after you started coming over after your shifts. 

Sun sets you down on said bed, making sure the stuffed animals themed around the other animatronics didn’t fall off the bed, before getting on himself. He looked awkward, his large body taking up a good bit of space on the bed. Not that you minded, of course.

The two of you cuddled, Sun as the big spoon, and you the little spoon. You rant about your week while Sun just holds you and nods along. You guys stay like that for a long time. You’re so deep in your rant that you don’t notice that the lights have turned off and Moon had come out. 

“And then Natasha had the gaul to tell me that I was an idiot for not doing it right! Like, she would have made the same fucking mistake!” 

“I’ll chat with her, if you’d like,” Moon said, rubbing a cool hand across your cheek.

You jumped slightly, but leaned into his touch. “You shouldn’t do that. She’ll get all defensive and probably get on my ass about it.”

Moon simply shrugged and pulled you closer to him. 

“How were the kids today?”

“They weren’t that bad. A few kids didn’t want to nap, so I let them color as the others slept.”

“That was nice of you.”

“What was I supposed to do, force them to sleep? That would have just made them upset and I’d have to deal with it.”

You smiled. Even though he didn’t want to admit it to anyone else, Moon was a big softie. “Of course, of course. Anything else?”

Moon hummed. “There was this one kid who was having a nightmare, so I woke her up and had her lay on me while I played my music box. She slept well after that.”

You stayed silent for a bit, debating whether or not you wanted to ask the question that was on your mind. 

“Could you… could you maybe turn it on now?” You asked, slightly nervous.

Moon made a noise of agreement and flipped a switch on his back. The sound of his music box filled your ears, and you felt a wave of exhaustion fall over you. Moon hummed along with the music, his voice box a good match for the pitch. Your eyes started to become too heavy to keep open, and you fell asleep.

[notzawzark]

GHOST (mw2) X MALE READER (platonic)

NOT ROMANCE, uh, reader kinda already had a backstory, so kinda bordering on oc, but things like his hight/skincolor/appearance in general is kept blank.

its kinda dogshit looking back on it, so dont expect it to be like.. good, in any sense of the word, its riddled with plot holes and like. writting inconsistency. and also the writting as a whole is just.. mid

TW/CW's: torture, implications towards past abuse, maybe other stuff, but you get the gist, if you your not for any of this, dont read, keep yourself safe

“so..” I break the silence that had once held the room hostage. “you're ghost.” I didn't expect him to actually get captured, let alone get captured alive. Looking through all the intel we have on him, by all means we shouldn’t have been able to get him alive.

I doubt doing this will prove fruitfull.

Were both sat In an “interrogation” room. Only recently was it promoted as such. It used to be more of a “torture and kill” room. Its empty for the most part, only a metal table, two old wood chairs sitting across from each other, and a few pieces of paper with a pencil on my side of the table.

A door behind me, no windows, walls made of some bleak concrete. There are two guards outside the room blocking the door. Not for me. For him. Hes tied up, the boss was never one to take chances. Neither would I with the record and reputation this man has racked up.

“you probably know why you’re here..” I look around “ in this… room.”  He doesn’t budge. The mask makes this infinitely harder. “you should probably get comfortable.. I don’t see you leaving anytime soon.” I sigh. I don’t see him leaving ever. Hell probably get killed before he ever gets that luxury. 

“ill be completely honest with you. My.. boss, along with all my associates think that what im doing is pointless. They all want to tear into that skin of yours.” I put my feet onto the table. Taking a deep breath in trying to figure out how to word my next sentence. 

“I don’t think any of that will work.” Its blunt, but its true. “I think” I pick up the pencil on the table and start tapping it absentmindedly. “that no amount of pain, or threatening of your life, or humiliation will make you to tell them what they want to hear.” I look him dead in the eyes, trying to gage how he reacts. “I think that shit just brews spite.”

 Nothing. Honestly its kind of uncomfortable. Staring into his unblinking eyes. They always kinda look glazed over, and red, like he doesn’t sleep much. “I hope you can help me prove them wrong. Because once im done here today theyre going to start torturing you.” I look away. The eye contact is to uncomfortable. “so, whats your real name, ghost?” he doesn’t respond. “what is it.. jack? Is it.. jason?” (I wrote this at 2 am, and thought that jason was ghosts brothers kid, im pretty sure that isnt right, but ignore it, his name is jason now) theres something in his eyes when I say the name jason, but I don’t think its his name. maybe someone he knows. Or knew. “ill be honest im trying to think of british sounding names, and I cant find any.” I crack a joke. Obviously, he doesnt respond.

I sigh. This is going to take awhile. I suggest a few more names. Jason was the only thing that he reacted at. A small reaction however. It could have just been my mind playing tricks. “what about your family?” hopefully this gives me more. “what was your mom like?” nothing. “your dad?” an eye dart. There. That. That is what I needed. I hum, its low, its clearly satisfied. He picks up on it. “your dad, was he a good man,”

Shit. Nothing. Hes either correcting himself now because He knows what im doing. That im trying to get a stir out of him. Or I was mistaken about his reaction. I continue. “was he a bad man?” nothing. Im going to kill myself. “my dad was a bad man.” He shows a hint of confusion. I assume he wasn’t expecting me to talk about myself. “I mean he wasn’t a horrible man from what Ive heard. But he left me and my mom.” I get up from my spot on my chair, and hop up, sitting on the edge of the table to his right. I can see his face better now.

“and a good person doesn’t leave their family, now do they?”

He shifts his focus over to my new spot. He wants to talk. I don’t know what he wants to say, but I can feel his eagerness in the air. “from what I hear you have a dead brother.” Surprise, then anger, then sadness. He looks away. Off to his left. That makes things harder. “how old are you?” he looks to the table as he asks me a question. He seems genuinely curious. “well your definitely British, Jesus.” I remark on his accent. He looks up at me, unamused with my observation.

“im 20.” He doesn’t buy it at all. “19” he seems even less convinced. “17” his eyes narrow. “fine, 16..” I mumble looking at the ground. I don’t see his reaction, but it doesn’t matter. “what is someone your age doing workin’ for a group like this?” I side eye him. “and what is someone of your status doing getting caught by a group like this?” he grunts and goes back to looking to his left.

I sigh, I probably shouldn’t have retorted with that. I might just have sent myself back to square one. “what do you do with your free time, mr. ghost?” he doesn’t respond yet again. I definitely sent myself back to square one. I get off of the table, back into my seat across from him, “have you ever had any pets?” I look up at him, to see his reaction.

It’s a very telling reaction. Hes uncomfortable. “yes? No?” nothing. I look back down, grabbing a piece of paper, and the pencil, I start drawing him. He doesn’t know that though, or at least I assume he doesn’t. I might be a bit more obvious then I want to be. “whats your favorite animal?” I look up again. Hes uncomfortable, less then before, but that’s probably just him regulating it. “mine are snakes.”

He closes his eyes. Ive definitely found something. Theres a moment of silence. “I like the big yellow ones.” He opens his eyes. “I also like the folklore and stories behind snakes.” Hes disengaged. Fuck.

I back down. “who is your favorite artist.” Safer. “music, painting, writing it doesn’t matter.” I focus on my drawing. Im not looking to get a reaction. ”don’t have one.”  He answers. “why not?” a genuine question. “don’t have time to have one.” 

“well I mean, you cant be working all the time, you get a few weeks off after each mission right?”

“no.”

I hum a response. High pitched. Acknowledging what he said. I begin to get more focused on my drawing, talking less and less. Eventually were both sitting in silence, the only noise in the room being my pencil scratching against the paper.

“you like art?” he nods to the drawings in front of me.

“it passes the time.”

He doesn’t say anything after that. An hour passes by. Im done. Well. As done as ill ever be. I stand up, pushing my chair back. Eyes fixated on my art. Analyzing it to no end. I pick it up, and place it infront of ghost, while I stand close beside him.

“your eyes are expressive.” It sounds creepier then I meant it to. He looks down at it. He really looks at it. Not just a glance over. taking a few minutes. for a bit I think hes fallen asleep until he speaks. “impressive.” 

That’s all he has to say? He looks at a drawing for three minutes in silence, and all he has to say is one word? ‘impressive????’ that’s it????? This guy is gonna make me shoot myself. “thank you.” I try my best to make it sound earnest. A very difficult task. 

I sit back down at my chair. Hes still looking at the art. “theyre probably gonna come soon.” He looks confused at first, but then it clicks. Hes gonna meet those associates i mentioned earlier. “but if you give me as much as a hint of what they want to hear, I can probably stop him.” Ghost doesn’t respond. Quiet as always. I sigh and lean back in my chair. He looks down to the drawing again. “you ever been drawn before?” I ask

“negative.”

What freak talks like that? Negative??? I get hes in the military but Jesus fucking christ. “you can keep it if you get out of here alive.” I laugh at my own joke under my breath. 

“hold onto it. I don’t want it getting bloody.” He looks up from the drawing. Completely deadpan. I cant tell wether hes joking or not. 

The door behind me opens, I get up off my chair. “heyyy.” I greet the man at the door from my spot. Hes big. Big big. Probably 6’7-6’8. Sturdy build. Hes always been scary, but I guess that’s a part of the magic. He rolls in a cart im unpleasantly familiar with. It has an assortment of metal tools. For all sorts of different things.

“(reader).”he acknowledges me. his voice always finding a way to unsettle me. He walks past me, dragging his cart of goodies with him. He stops. Grabbing onto ghosts chair, the wood making a shrill sound as he trudges it to the back wall. He takes his cart with him. Ghosts breathing has gone rapid. Mine probably would too. Scratch that. Mine definitely would too.

I grab my drawing off the table. I don’t want to be in here. I start to leave. “(reader), leaving so soon?” the big man turns around, some horrible device already in his hands. Im quiet. I have to watch what I say around him. “yeah.” I search for the right words. “you know I don’t like loud sounds.” Its true, I don’t. theres a tenseness in the room. Like a twig bending before it finally snaps. 

He turns his normal sick expression into a hallow smile. “how forgetful of me.” He turns back to ghost. Whose eyes are darting around the room. Probably looking for a way out. He closes them shut tightly, and I find that my queue to leave. I quickly walk through the door, past the guards, and out into the hallway. 

That night wasn’t a very restful one. the concrete walls might as well have been made of paper.

boom, you made it to the end, wow thats rad, heres an emoji : 🤯

ALSO if i do continue this, ghost and reader are prob gonna have like a father/son or older/younger brother bond. but yeah. uh i hoped you liked the fanfic.

[rontra]

holding your hand looking into your eyes is the exact energy I intended thank you for picking up on it

🤝

typeoneninja asked: Maybe though do say who powergirl is because I have actually less than zero idea

oh my god i get to talk about my blorbo...okay well you MUST understand i'm still a comics newbie and laser focus on only the stuff i directly care about so it's not like i've read everything about her or anything (and things do vary--sometimes A LOT depending on the character lol--from comic to comic as is DC's dark design). so take everything here as kinda loosy-goosy from someone who's Casually Acquainted. however (LONG POST)

^me.

you know Supergirl right. heard of her. kara zor-el (spelling may wary) she's superman's cousin (usually) and has the same power set. it's me supergirl and i have all your powers

power girl is Also kara zor-el (spelling may vary) from a Different Dimension. two of them.

the details about her backstory vary a little but the agreed upon IDEA for her is that her home dimension has like collapsed somehow or the earth in it is torn to shreds or whatever. she's either like the only survivor of a dimension that went poof or she's been isekai'd here from an earth that was getting blown up by demons or whatever.

and now there's two karas and theyre forced to coexist on the same earth and they can't both show up dressed like supergirl so now power girl has to do her own thing.

that's like generally the gist of whats going on w her conceptually. she got vooped over here and now she's stranded on an earth that isn't hers with castmates that aren't the same people she knew

like i said the specifics of her backstory vary but on top of being Dimension Displaced she usually shares Supergirl's whole "after their home planet exploded she arrived to earth much later than Superman did, due to Space Shenanigans" thing. she's usually older than supergirl. and she DOES have bigger boobs also. NOT sure why that's a dimensional difference between them but i'll take it (what were they feeding her on earth 2?)

sometimes they're drawn basically looking identical. i can understand the impulse (they are both kara zor-el after all.) but i think it's kind of a shame when power girl doesn't look Older than her because i like it when she's older than her. i guess sometimes they either ditch that part or just don't feel like it. F.

anyway when they look identical you can usually tell them apart by identifying which one DC has bequeathed the Boob Window upon and that one will be power girl. works every time

to me i became enamored with her when i was reading some green lantern comic (it was my first comic, they had launched a guy's coffin into the sun and had to go get it back it was wack) and i noticed a boob window girl (my beloved) had BEEN INVITED but didnt get to DO anything. she spent all her time standing in crowd shots while other people did the main stuff. and i thought "wow. now there's a character i need to put in my purse". and the rest is history

it was like this

i felt like bad for her i was like oh honey...you're coming with me... my girl in the ensemble

she kind of struggles in general because she doesn't get a lot of content coming her way. (and when she does it's not usually stuff that i love.) she shares this with supergirl too 🥰

anyway i hope that helps a little. she's supergirl from a different dimension and she's stuck here now. is the gist of it.

-

for a bonus side-elaboration on what IM doing over here in my AU, my main basis for CTDE power girl is her shenanigans in the n52 where she gets stuck here WITH another extremely normal girl (they get isekai'd together during like a big dumb demon war on their home earth). that's helena wayne she's batman's daughter in the other dimension and no such person exists on this earth. they're both stuck (together) (the only 2 people on earth who know and understand each other) (it's romance) (superbat for girls)

in that story power girl becomes like mildly obsessed for a bit with devising a way to get HOME to her own dimension and earth which is (as far as she knows) still under siege by Planet Fucking Hellmouth. shes building machines. shes using technology

(while helena believes there's nothing to go home to anymore and they should try to make a new life in this new dimension)

what gets me about it is that its SO FUNNY that this specific power girl's setup is basically a supervillain origin story that they just don't lean into because her name is on the book (obviously). (hey why do so many villains build a DimensionFucking Machine that's gonna Fuck Up the Dimensions because theyre obsessed with something on the other side anyway)

but i feel no such restraint obviously!!!!

so anyway my CTDE "Arc 1" is about Power Girl (now almost two decades deep in her desperate fixation) finishing building the ultimate DimensionFucker 9000 to get home. shes been working on this for years. she doesn't care very much about this earth and she needs to go back to her own one NOW

Helena is realizing with horror she's way too late to talk her babygirl out of this one because PG just isn't listening to her anymore (and as a human she would struggle to snap PG out of it by force). she feels she has no other recourse but to betray her most specialest girl and sell her out to supergirl, who's investigating the Weird Dimension Rift Shit that's been going on (and is strong enough to actually fight her)

And Supergirl has to stop PG because what that thing is doing to HER universe is NOT GOOD!!!!!

(Supergirl was like a teenager when her home planet krypton went kaboom--she Remembers it and feels detached from everything because she doesn't Have a home anymore + oh my god the trauma + also no one on earth even really needs her that much. but that doesn't mean PG can DESTROY THE DIMENSION!!!!)

(also in my AU the other earth is actually lost for good, so it's not only a Grief Quest but a FUTILE Grief Quest because there's no one alive and nothing to salvage on the other side of the portal anyway)

It's the "Power Girl As Villain In A Supergirl Book" arc. because i think women should have cute obsessions that endanger other people and i LOVE when the karas interact

this is why i drew pictures of them being very not nice to each other 😔

like it all works out. it's fine. they do some crying and screaming at each other, some kicking and punching, helena gets her piece in, and PG's brain fungus finally calms down enough for her to take the "Protagonist Kara" seat for Arc 2 (when Supergirl has her own issues to deal with)

theres just a lot of "kara zor el screaming At Herself that she can't go home because there is no such place anymore and she has to live with that forever in a place she doesn't belong". you know. girl talk

anyway that's like roughly power girl + what im doing with her in my first arc (helena is here too dont worry) hope that helps. shes my comic blorbo. hope she gets the main stage in a good comic someday. MDGHBJFGM

[claudiajcregg]

Tell Other People About Your WIPs

make a list of all your WIPs with a brief description of each and then people can ask you questions about them and then tag other people.

Tagged by both @onekisstotakewithme and @miabicicletta 💜💜💜 Thank you, guys <3 I don't know who to tag that hasn't been tagged already. Interested? Tag, you're it! :) (Please do know that there are no set sections. Pick whatever you want. I went the deranged route.)

I have an outdated WIP list, and many others unaccounted for. This is just a selection of stuff I could see myself posting or editing/retooling to write something new. I love talking about my WIPs, about as much as I hate being perceived because they are not remotely interesting. (I also love knowing which ones people are interested in! I have an incentive to work on them!) (Instead of snippets, part of my feedback loop is sending actual rough drafts to get a sense of whether it's worth working on more.)

Multichapters, different levels of completion.

S5 Pregnancy AU. My main WIP. Can you believe I’ve had this idea for a year… almost to the day? I’ve been stuck since November bc I don’t know how I want this one to end, beyond a birth. (As I’ve mentioned in the past, I feel like this has legs to become a fluffy universe. I have ideas! Timelines!) Gist of it: CJ gets pregnant circa Zooey's kidnapping. How does it change S5? It's less angsty than you think.

Campaign bars, aka campaign conversations sometimes happened at bars in the 1998 campaign. Fun stuff. I need to pick it right back.

What Once Was Ours or the IM AU (2021), aka IM ends with a breakup. Not a WIP. Not a UFO. A secret third thing. (“Finished” but not edited, and I’m doubtful people would be interested. Probably bc of some bittersweet ~memories~ attached to it. I mean, I shared a third of it to discord and people couldn’t care less, at least after a while. Now, better IM AUs are being posted these days; I'm not in a rush.) 33 chapters. 150k words. I do reread it every once in a while, and I cannot put it down. But its 'age' takes me aback. If things had been different, I'd have posted this in H2 2021/Q1 2022 (or even the planned Q2-3 2021). But alas.

The “Almost Ready, question mark” Category

Another SVD prompt meme claim: what if CJ has the crush first. The thing is, I tend to write her as having a relatively obvious crush on him at first until something makes her wise up. So this is just some ridiculous, post-first-meeting thoughts. Most of it was written in one sitting! It kinda fits with something in the campaign bars fic, too.

Post birth, hospital story: A couple of hours after their bb girl is born. Pure fluff. Recently reworked it to make it less wordy. Still failed, but it’s better focused now.

Many ficlets – the few I did post on Tumblr that haven’t been posted to the story I’m collecting them in, plus a couple more. I'm thinking the ice skating one, Jan 22, a few post-eps I wrote last year, etc.

Ambitious Projects I don't think are happening right away (or ever), but probably have a detailed outline somewhere

(I put this up instead of last, because the next category has faves, but it's also a long one.)

Danny is back a bit earlier on s7. Toby leaks (or tries to leak? I always wavered) the shuttle to him, as he and CJ are getting closer.

Simon lives. How does his relationship with CJ evolve post-honeymoon phase? What is it like when Danny returns?

You’ve got mail AU. This outline had two ways the climax could go. I had fun.

Epistolary collab (?) fic. Probably an X + 1 fic. The only one with nothing written; don’t rule out writing it individually at some point.

And because this is so long already (but not as long as it could be)… A few more under the cut – more "I just want to make sure I like them" and "this meme reminded me I meant to pick those back up." And they are still not all. (How do you summarize seven years of writing?? I've only posted 20-something of them, lol.)

“Almost Ready (but I feel like I want to make changes to them) (might just redo them altogether)”

Haunted by the Notion, 2007 edition. My beta Ruth suggested this when she edited the other story, and I wrote it around then. It’s another Christmas dinner at Filomena, and, eight years later, things are different. I feel like it hits expected beats, and is just missing some oomph. Maybe. (As much as I do like it, half tempted to make it 2009. Or later.)

Heaven’s here…: A interrupted proposal. I’ve written many proposals over the years, and I love toying with different ideas and setups. Danny takes the lead here, but I’ve been intrigued by the idea of having CJ do the final twist.

5 to 6 am 'me' time. Another story inspired by last year’s rewatch that I wrote right at the start of it (so Jan 2023?). It has five short parts with five different years of what CJ describes in the pilot as her “me time.” This is one when I think one per year would be fun, but I don’t want to repeat myself.

One bed, “sexy” edition. An AU to a sort of AU (one of the drabbles from this summer) and… it's what it says on the tin. The world does not need to read my attempts at smut. If I didn’t put it in the previous category, it’s because I am not sure that I want to post it. (All the previous attempts are locked somewhere; unfortunately, someone loves this one and noticed when I tried to do that, lol.)

First baby kick: I remember writing this while in grad school (so, late 2017? First half of 2018) but I lost it, along other fic, when my laptop had to be reset because I used Bear to write back then, but didn’t have sync across devices. I rewrote it, and I feel like it's not the same, but still. It's sweet! Includes: Danny talking to the baby, domestic fluff, and… baby kicks!

“This meme reminded me they exist and I love them, so don't be surprised if they are posted before anything in a previous category”

(Lbr, if I added something about them in this post at all, it’s because they sparked some memory.)

Mosaic broken hearts: CJ, circa S4, jealousy. Prompted by a former fandom friend, back in my productive era (first half of 2021; before that friend just ghosted me.)

I can’t believe I captured your heart (pancake breakfast, three words and eight letters). For a while there, I edited it so much but then I fell off. iirc, it was part of some morning-related prompts I saw around that I tried to fulfill in 2018? 2019? And they had like internal progression. But this one was the best of the 3-4, and I kept tweaking it.

Green light of forgiveness (IM-ish) — there are many other IM/IM-Tomorrow snippets I’ve written over the years. I’m not sure if this one makes much sense, but I liked it enough.

Distance — I recall liking this one! Might have to bump it up. CJ is in Africa, Danny is at the Farm and sulking because they left off on some sort of argument. There is some Danny-Abbey friendship goodness here. I even have a second file that is “Distance - shorter version (it’s not)”

Danny writes fiction, shows it to CJ during her pregnancy and she’s into it. Technically written. I would probably try to take another stab at it. Third time might be the charm?

San Andreo phone call/fallout from ID. I just had the idea of CJ reaching out once things calm down. This is one of those fics I’ve written a version of every year or so, but I think there was one I liked quite a bit.

Terrible taste in men — a run-in with an OC ex of CJ. It was so dumb.

Fka Impatience - actually beta’d three years ago (by that fandom friend I've mentioned twice before… actually, three times) and “done”. I just think I’d change so much about it these days. It started being something else but ended up being a CJ-Toby friendship story in which they have lunch and catch up. But I would want to rewrite most of it now, and not just because it’s from like… 2019 (but finished in 2021).

I forgot this one initially! he's passing by, rare as the comet in my sky - 2? 3? times CJ thinks she sees Danny somewhere, and one time she does. (Which tried to work in the 'I remember shunning you' line.) I even wrote some sort of sequel later! Probably useless.

I said I would post a lightning round with fics that are either also done but not ready for me to mention them, or just… not done at all. The length of this post and how much I've spent on it is embarrassing. To give a general overview: in line with the nonsense I've been mentioning, includes phone calls at the end of S7, also a few friendship-focused fics around that time, too; present-day stuff; anniversaries; Hollis fundraisers; weddings; many ficlets, introspective thoughts, a “yes day” fic that's super sweet but needs better dares, the third memoir idea (the original one!!!!) that I had three years ago… And those are mostly the ones I had preselected, lol.

If you're interested, I can screenshoot this part in the notes app if you message me!

Anyway, this is embarrassing, and the worst part is that it's not all. fml.

[freshlybakedspiderbread]

seiga kaku?

im gonna actively try to keep myself concise and to single points because its been so easy for me in the past to get lost in wicked hermit thoughts and veer off who knows where... Part of it surely has to do with how a long time ago i used to have an rp blog on tumblr where i spent everyday thinking about seiga to some extent!

General opinion/How much I care about them: there was a long period of time where i would say without a doubt she was my single favourite character in touhou. I couldn't properly point to any one reason, or any tidy chain of events that might have led to it, other than learning about her, reading and seeing various very formative doujin works featuring her and the th13 crew, and maybe some old-fashioned projecting led me to latching onto every aspect of her... These days, there's a lot of touhous I obsess and go wild over and to even greater extents than her, but seiga objectively has the longest history of making me go a little nuts, whereas even aya took a little more time to nettle into my brain.

I like Seiga a lot and ive thought about her a lot, is what im getting at!

A ship I love: seiyoshi (seiga/yoshika) is funny in that it has a lot of little 'requirements' to me. Like if intepreted as just purely the evil hermit controlling a tool that she herself murdered to obtain, i think thats boring. But likewise, if its intepreted as just the hermit tragically trying to preserve her departed beloved, well that might be better but still lacking to me.

i couldnt possibly get across my ideal backstory for them right now, but the ultimate gist of it is that Seiga definitely did care for the living Yoshika who then died unexpectedly, before Seiga could decide herself whether she would commit to teaching her the ways of the hermit or simply get bored and move on. Her main motivation in performing the most ludicrously evil magic and create a jiangshi was because she refused to let even the natural order of life and death take anything away from her.

....Thaaaat all aside, i think their interactions in present day are just really funny 😄 Seiga 'spoiling' her dear Yoshika who laughs off being a meat shield because its not like she can die again!

A non-romantic relationship that I love: I think Seiga and Futo have the most oddball dynamic among the taoists and also Futo is probably the only one Seiga wouldn't have intense romanctic tension with. Futo who is a weirdo herself, acknowledges Seiga as their wise teacher of the arts (calling her seiga-donno) and yet also does not think of her as above any of them in their little personal hierarchy because Futo knows Seiga has no interest in being a proper retainer to Miko, so all of Futo's formalities almost come off as either sarcastic or as a really esoteric form of endearment. Meanwhile, Seiga probably thought a long time ago Futo would grow weary of things like loyalty and matters of noble blood or talking like an ancient old person, but none of that happened and Futo remains the same as ever, which has been altogether surprising, charming, and exasperating for Seiga (and everone else but they're all mostly charmed 😊)

The NOTP: i guess you'd have to work especially hard to get me to gel with pairing her up with any of myouren temple's folks. I get the temptation since every other taoist has one or two easily paired up counterpart there, but its not enough to just cross a checklist and leave it at that!

(that said, if you were gonna pair up buddhists and taosists thematically, i get why one might put seiga with shou since they were technically most vital in backstory with miko/byakuren respectively, and also because they both have a servant, one jiang-shi and a mouse. but i always thought seiga made a better parallel witn nue personally)

My biggest headcanon about them: most of this post is already headcanon, but as for another 'big' one...

I believe over the last thousand and whatever years, Seiga made semi-regular (as in maybe once every few years or a century?) visits to the tomb where Miko and gang slept, indulging and refreshing her memories of them, chatting up Tojiko who is now a ghost. And then sometime in 2011 right as her hermit senses told her it was finally time to meet them all again, she went to to tomb to greet them all only to find out literally the entire place was gone 😨

so all within like a week or something, Seiga had to go on a mad investigative quest where she discovered they had all been whisked to Gensokyo at some point, had to learn what the heck Gensoyko even is, how to get herself there, and then arrived just in time to get blasted by the incident resolvers. Really busy time in her life!

An idea for a fanfiction I would like to write/read about them: ha... one day, my multi-part seiga backstory fic incorporating every stray headcanon i've ever had. and then i quit writing forever maybe n_n

That aside, a funny scenario would be Okina appearing trying to stir drama because Seiga is basically the reason why Miko divorced Okina. And Seiga has no idea who she is or about any of that because Miko never mentioned it 😌

Something that makes me think of them: pretzels.

also its someone elses fault but luo tianyi is just the seiga vocaloid to me 😑

[fightertown-usa]

mamma mia! (i) ( top gun x reader )

rooster x fem!reader; bob x fem!reader; hangman x fem!reader

synopsis: its basically mamma mia 2 au  but top gun remix; uhm reader sleeping w three diff guys, youll get the gist. also i started like quoting random lyrics bare w me i got carried away

word count: 4.4k

warnings: mamma mia?reader being sad bc her friends r somewhere else; also unedited bc i dont like reading my writing lol

notes: 

tagged: @viscountesskatesharma HERE WE GOO

support your content creators! likes are always appreciated, but comments and reposts help tremendously! mwah!

part two - coming soon!

—

after graduating top gun, the cold, hard truth hit you: you were bored. you were stationed somewhere in nevada, and nothing had come in for you, you had no excuse to go hop in a multi million dollar fighter pilot and go kick some ass. instead, you spent your days at the base, bored, and your nights at the nearby bar. and on this fine evening, you headed down to the nearby bar, sadly dubbed “middle o’ nowhere”. you didn’t bother to change out of your basic uniform, some straight leg khakis, a crisp white shirt, and you threw your flight jacket on for good measure, your call sign adorned on it, it read: dynamo. (yes like donna and the dynamos, i know what im doing w this !)

another sad truth, was that you missed your two best friends, rosie and tanya, who were off stationed in the middle of the pacific. god, you missed them. you were supposed to meet up with them in greece soon, but soon seemed so, so far away from today. so, here you were, walking into the middle o’ nowhere, ready to down a few drinks and wallow in your own lonesomeness. or, so you thought. you’d spend your last day before being shipped off to california drowning in vodka, or whatever you could get your hands on.

lost in your thoughts, you were suddenly snapped out of them when you ran into a stranger, knocking you back slightly, but not hard enough to send you falling. he instantly reached out and grabbed your forearm to steady you, as he starting spewing apologies, apologizing that he hadn’t been looking where he was going. you finally looked up at him, and were met by piercing blue eyes, and you froze as you studied his face. he was easy on the eyes, that was for sure. his aviator glasses gave him some boyish charm, and his hair was parted to the side and slicked back, giving him a clean look. you suddenly remembered to respond when he asked if you were okay. “yeah, it’s okay, don’t worry about it,” you said cooly, but the blonde refused your apology. “captain l/n, i’m so so sorry, is there anything i can do to make it up to you,” he said again, and you wondered how you’d never seen this guy before. maybe you’re time in the middle of nowhere wouldn’t have been so bad if you had actually looked around at your colleagues. 

“yeah, lt. floyd, you can buy me a drink,” you said smugly, catching him by surprise as he realized you’d read his name tag, and by the fact that you, one of the most reserved people in the nevada station he’d ever met, actually wanted him, a lowly lt. to buy you a drink. he’d never even seen you talk to anyone unless it was business related, and despite the fact of being three doors down from your room for the past year, he’d never even seen anyone go in or out of it besides you. “oh-okay!” bob said, a little dumbfounded which made you chuckle as you led him to the bar. 

a few drinks in, you had explained to bob how you had plans to go to greece with your friends, how you loved to play the guitar, which led to bob telling you you could have his after he gave up on trying to were. you made sure to leave out how you were leaving the next morning for california, slightly hoping maybe he’d make a move tonight. the truth was, bob had fallen under your spell. he had always thought you were gorgeous, and actually being able to talk to you just showed him how much of a great person you were. it didn’t help that you managed to look so damn fine in your plain white t-shirt and khakis. and for the first time in a while, bob actually had some confidence that maybe, just maybe, he had a chance with you. 

with waterloo by abba playing in the background, you began humming along, smiling as you listened to it. to say you were a big abba fan was an understatement, and who knows, maybe someday you’d face your waterloo. right now, bob was pretty sure he was facing his right now. 

waterloo, knowing my fate is to be with you

it was hard to resist him, and your loneliness wasn’t helping how the more you kept looking at him, the more you realized how absolutely gorgeous bob was. he seemed sweet and nerdy at first, but you could only imagined how ripped he was under his khaki uniform. was it bad you were already fantasizing about you begging for him to ruin you? probably. did you care? no. 

bob, on the other hand, hated how fast he was falling for you in the moment. poor bob, he was just a hopeless romantic searching for love, and you, well, you were searching for a night you didn’t have to spend by yourself. as the two of you walked back to your quarters, bob suddenly asked you a question out of the middle of nowhere. “could you maybe, i dont know, move your bag to your other shoulder?” he inquired, and you gave him a puzzled look. “weird, but okay?” you responded, shifting your bag to your other shoulder. “sorry, i just, makes it easier for our hands to brush up against each other, and i might, spontaneously take your hand or something like that,” bob spoke, earning a laugh out of you. “or you could just ask to hold it,” you said, and he gave you a sheepish look. “that was my backup plan,” he said as he took your hand, as the two of you fell into a comfortable silence as you approached your quarters. 

“what if i spontaneously invited you in,” bob said quietly.

“i’d have to accept,” you responded, and bob felt his face flush slightly, as he fiddled with the keys, before pushing open the door. 

you didn’t even give him a second to breathe, you were quick to push him against the wall right outside the door, as you attached your lips to him, urgency and need poured into his lips as you kissed him. he was quick to attach a hand to your waist, pushing the door closed with his other, as he internally freaked out that you were actually kissing him. and he hoped, just hoped, that maybe, you’d actually talk to him after tonight. 

when he woke up the next morning, he wasn’t surprised to find his bed empty, your scent still lingering on his pillow. he groaned as he stretched his back slightly, wincing as he felt the scratch marks you’d left on his back, and a wave of sadness fell over bob as he realized you hadn’t wanted anything more then a one night stand. (guys this is so painful to write i love bob i dont want to hurt i apologize)

dear bob, in our fleeting time together, i've learned about your dreams, and your ambitions. also that you can get it, but that's besides the point. sorry for leaving you here but, you'll know where to find me, if you want to.

best, dynamo

— 

your superior had informed you that you were no longer needed in california, and your leave had been approved by your superior, and you instantly phoned rosie and tanya to tell them the good news. youd arrive a week or two earlier and them, but you didn’t care, you were off! you soon cursed your arrival, as you fifteen seconds late before your boat took off, heading to one of the smaller islands you were planning to stay on. “shit!” you exclaimed, annoyed as you then realized your trunk was open, half your clothes you’d pack littering the dock. 

“it’s a whole wardrobe out here, seems to be my lucky day,” a voice came from behind you, causing you to turn around, as you came to face a tall, hot, blonde stranger. not another one. it didnt help that he was in a tight, navy shirt and some swim trunks. his green eyes sparkled as he looked down at you, holding a bikini top of yours up to his chest. “i think this’ll do just fine,” he said, causing you to laugh, as he helped you get your clothes together, as you shoved them back into your bag. “where are you headed to, gorgeous,” he spoke smoothly, shooting you a blinding smile that made you weak in the knees. “the little island, but my boat just left, about five minutes ago,” you said, pouting slightly. “well, no need to fear, i happen to own this fine boat to our left,” the blonde stranger spoke, and you smiled. 

“cptn y/n l/n, but a lot of people call me by my call sign, dynamo,” you said, holding out your hand for the blonde stranger to shake. “lt. jake seresin, hangman,” he said, taking your hand, but instead of shaking it, he brought your hand up to his lips, kissing it lightly, sending a wink your way. “i wouldn’t mind bringing you to the little island,” he said, and you smiled at him as he helped you bring your luggage onto the boat. after you’d situated yourself and hangman had gotten the boat coming, he waltzed on over to you, as he sat down next to you, captain’s hat on his head, and toothpick in between his teeth, as you felt his thigh press against yours. “you know, it just seems so sad, how heartbroken i’ll be after you leave my boat, my lonely, sad heart, may collapse!” he said dramatically, putting his hands on his chest, before slowly putting one hand on your thigh, causing you to roll your eyes. you stood up, putting a hand on your hip. “so, you’re one of those, are you?” you said, rolling your eyes. “there are two kinds of seducers, first, the one that doesn’t actually like women so he wants to assert his power over them, but the second, and far more dangerous, is the guy who genuinely falls in love every evening, only to fall out if again the next morning,” you spoke as you paraded around his boat. you could tell he wanted to sleep with you desperately, based off how touchy he’d been as soon as you’d met him, but he also seemed to have more depth to his character, but you didn’t know if you could do another bob situation, as he still lingered in your thoughts ever since the other night.

“give me a chance, dynamo, let me show you,” he spoke, and you gave him a pointed look. 

it’s only natural, but why did it have to be me

“nights can be empty and nights can be cold, so you were looking, for someone to hold,” hangman sung out as he spun you around, the two of you dancing around on his boat, music blasting in the background.

but baby, believe me, it’s better, to forget me

little did you know that standing at the same dock you had been standing at less than an hour ago, stood bob, luggage in tow, sadness in his eyes as he watched the two of you dancing on hangman’s boat, as you danced in the pink hues of the sunset behind the two of you, as you sailed off. 

men are the toys in the game that you play

when you get tired, you throw them away

that’s only natural,,,

“but why did it have to be me,” bob said softly, before turning around and walking away, defeated.

as hangman dropped you off at the dock to the little island, he handed you your luggage. “i’ll be back in about two weeks,” he said, grin on his face as he studied your face, taking in your features as he watched you. “i got a boat race, but don’t worry dynamo, i won’t be gone for too long,” he said with a wink, to which you rolled your eyes at. “goodbye, hangman,” you replied, as you left him there at the dock, his eyes never leaving your figure until he couldn’t see you anymore. he’d come back for you, he swore to himself he would.

falling in love with a woman like you

happens so quickly, there’s nothing to do

that’s only natural, but why did it have to be me?

you managed to lug your bags up the many steps on the island, until you finally came across the run down hotel that you recognized that you were supposed to stay at. you dropped your bags off at the front, telling yourself you’d search for someone later, too taken by the beauty of the place. a crash of thunder shook the building, as you began to hear something struggling from the flight of stairs nearby you, and you quickly ran down to see a horse trapped in, and the rain started pouring down on the both of you. suddenly, the roof of the side building you had wandered into collapses before the horse, and you quickly ran out to go find anyone to help. everyone seemed to have fled the area, taking refuge from the storm, but you refused to give up, screaming out for someone to come help you. you ran down a path, until you saw a motorcycle come up on the path. you waved your hands out, trying to make out the figure in the rain as the stranger came to a stop. upon seeing his face, you almost forgot that rain was pounding down onto the both of you. his brown hair stuck to his forehead, tousled and flattened down by the rain, his deep, brown eyes looked back at yours as you both froze for a second, the instant attraction striking you first. it didn’t help that his mustache only added to the fact that he looked like a greek god. his white shirt was soaked, leaving little to the eye. 

“there’s a horse,” you finally choked out, half shouting. “it’s trapped, please, please help me free it,” you spoke, clasping your hands together in hope that he would. he instantly nodded and motioned for you to get on the back of his motorcycle as you directed him through the rain. the two of you rushed into the building, and you couldn’t help but notice the electricity you felt when his hand made contact with your waist as he helped you over the debris from the roof. the horse reared up on its hind legs, neighing as the two of you slowly approached it. you continued your slow approach, before you were able to calm it down, as it let you stroke its face until it calmed down, and the rain seemed to stop as you did so. the brunette looked over at you and smiled, and you returned it. “you wanna, go for a walk maybe?” he asked, and you nodded your head, smiling.

“we’ve walked this whole island, and i’ve yet to see where you live,” you stated, as you and lt. bradley bradshaw, callsign: rooster. conversation flowed easily between the two of you, as if you both had been friends for years, and were just now reuniting. something about him just touched your soul, he was kind, and he was gentle. 

andante, andante,

go slowly with me now 

“in a shackle on a hill,” rooster replied, as the two of you wove through the trees as you made your way up the island. “and what the hell are you doing there?” you asked, and he stopped for a minute. “running away, i guess, back home, everything was lined up for me. my whole life was mapped out. i wanted to take a break before i signed up to it.” he replied, and you tilted your head to the side as you took in every single one of his words, “how ‘bout you,” he responded, and you shrugged. “i have absolutely nothing mapped out, i guess i chose to come here to just get away from the uniform life i’ve been living. i was stationed in nevada, but never got called for anything so, i got approved leave to come out here, see if there’s anything for me on this island. enough talking, let’s ride.”

andante, andante, 

and let the feeling go

it was safe to say riding on the back of rooster’s motorcycle, hands around his middle, leaning into his shoulder as the scenery of the little island flew by the two of you had reached your top five favorite things of all time. the two of you rode peacefully in the warm summer air, as you soon reached the town square, where numerous shops were set up, and as you hopped off his bike, you heard music coming from a nearby tavern. “let’s go!” you exclaimed, pulling rooster along with you, who only smiled, entranced by you. some guy was singing a song called kisses of fire, and as rooster brought you both your beers, you put your hand down on the table, “god i love this place, i’m never leaving!” you exclaimed and rooster chuckled. “your mom wouldn’t miss you?” he asked and you shook your head. “not that kinda mom,” you replied and he quickly apologized, but you brushed it off. “not a big deal, we’ve just never been too close, you know,” you replied, and he nodded. “i wish i could stay here forever,” he said, muttering with you under his breath, but you didn’t catch it.

“when do you go back?” you inquired, and a tug at your heart strings gave way to a wave of sadness to slowly creep up and over you. “to your mapped out life,” you added, trying to lighten the mood. “i have a week,” he said, a smile breaking out on his face at your attempt at a joke. he then knew he needed to tell you, so he spoke up, “look, there’s something, about what’s waiting for me back home,” he said, but you were quickly distracted as the band that was playing ended, and you got up to cheer for them. even though you had joined the navy and had become one of the best pilots of your generation, you still had a passion for music and performing, which was showing through right now. 

you turned back to the woman working at the bar, “excuse me, are you the owner?” you asked. “my son is the owner. bought this bar because no other place would let him play,” she said with a laugh, before her son sat down at your table. “hello, how may i help you?” he asked with a thick greek accent. “well firstly, you’re all awesome!” you exclaimed, and the man smiled. “and second, i’d be honored to perform here with my makeshift group, my friends arriving in a few days, and we’ve always dreamed of being able to perform together,” you said. “you have a good voice?” the son asked, and rooster, nodded, “like sugarcane,” he said, and you gave him a glare, before smiling at him as the man pulled you away from your chair, and rooster shot you a good luck thumbs up as the man handed you your microphone. boy, were you in over your head for this man.

the next few days seemed to go by in a flash, the closer you became with rooster, the more and more you realized that you wanted to stay on this island for good. and with him. you wanted to stay with him on this island for as long as you could, live in paradise with the man who seemed to have capture your attention so quickly. and you knew that when he finally kissed you outside the shack you had grown to love to spend time in with him, that you had never wanted anything more than for him to stay on this island with you. and when he kissed you breathless every time, you knew even more in your heart that there was no one else who’d ever captured your heart the way bradley bradshaw had. 

and as you skipped through the orange trees to pick fresh oranges and bring them back before bradley woke up from his sleep, you hummed to yourself, still unbelieving that your current reality was your current reality. everything felt so right, and you had never felt more alive and in love than you had right then and there. nothing could compromise the moment, or so you thought. it wasn’t until you were searching for a knife to cut open your orange, that you stumbled upon a brown leather notebook, with a photo sticking out of it. well, curiosity killed the cat, and it crushed your heart as you pulled out the photo, only to see an engagement photo of the man you’d fallen in love with, with a gorgeous woman, with a sparkling ring on your finger. coincidentally, rooster had walked over to you, a lovesick smile on his face, until he saw the photo you had on your hands, and he knew he had fucked up. it was just, every time he had tried to tell you you kept on getting distracted by the wonders of the island. 

you looked at him, pain in your eyes as he tried to explain himself, but you just ran. you ran far away from him, running back to town, but bradley refused to stop running after you. “y/n! please, please just hear me out, as he caught you on the stairs in the hotel you were originally supposed to be staying at. “fine! fine bradshaw, answer three questions for me, are you engaged to that beautiful woman?” you asked, and he nodded, “yes,” he said, as he watched your body rack with a sob clawing up your throat. “and did you tell me about it?” “no,” bradley spoke, his voice breaking and tears flooding his eyes as he watched you. 

“and do you seriously think i could ever forgive you?” you asked, your last question ringing out, before you turned around, continuing up the stairs. “y/n, please!” bradley called out, begging you to turn around and let him say more. “that’s enough listening, go!” you screamed at him, before running up the rest of the stairs, sobs racking your body as you made it to the room you had yet to spend more than thirty minutes in. you slammed the door behind you, before collapsing into the bed, your heart burning with pain as you couldn’t stop the picture of bradley and his fiance from popping back into your mind.

breaking up is never easy i know, but i have to go

knowing me, knowing you is the best i can do. 

the next day, you had never been more thankful for your friends, rosie and tanya, for finally showing up. but as happy as you were to see them, your slightly puffy and red eyes gave you away. they were quick to console you as you explained what had happened over the past two weeks, unaware that a familiar boat was slowly coming into view. and on that boat, stood jake seresin, praying to any god that you were still on this island you had been so set on. luckily your mind was quickly taken off bradley bradshaw as the bar owner was ecstatic that your friends had finally showed up, as he quickly got you dancing, singing, and smiling again. and as jake heard your voice, he rushed into the bar, breathless as he saw you up there singing. and when you two locked eyes, he really hoped you didn’t notice just how much he’d missed you. 

mamma mia, now i really know

my, my, i should not’ve let you go

it didn’t take long for you to fall back into the arms of jake seresin, and while your mind was still very preoccupied with the thoughts of bradley, and when you did have to catch his name from slipping out of your mouth as jake had you pinned down on his bed, headboard knocking against the back of his boat, you still knew that the guy above you loved you, not the same, but almost on the same level that bradley had. 

and bradley, he had come back for you. he’d called off his engagement and came back to the little island as soon as he could, only to hear from your friends that you were off with the sex icon of the seas, and that he could never compare to him. 

but your quick time with jake soon ended as he ended up getting called back to a station in the atlantic, needed for a mission. you couldn’t say you weren’t relieved, as your heart was still broken from bradley. but you were still greatful jake had taken your mind off him for a while. your friends left the island soon after, promising to write to you and to visit you once a year, when you told them you were staying on the island, helping out the mother of the bar owner with her hotel. but it seemed you wouldn’t be staying alone, as not soon after your friends had left, did you throw up, and then realization struck your face. 

you were pregnant.

mamma mia!

— 

“you all are the best of the best, or at least the best we could get ahold of,” cyclone stated, before introducing maverick to the pilots, and maverick surveyed the pilots that were considered the best. he recognized almost all the faces from the earlier debriefing about who all he’d be training, but his eyes fell to an empty desk, and then it hit him. “where’s dynamo? has captain l/n not arrived yet?” he asked in confusion, swearing he had seen your face on the screen of pilots they were asking to come back to top gun. “sorry maverick, she said she was quote preoccupied with family issues unquote,” cyclone replied, and maverick nodded, before continuing

however, three heads perked up at the mention of your name, and memories flooded back over three pilots, suddenly unable to focus on what maverick was saying. rooster, hangman, and bob all began reliving their memories with you, and cursed themselves for letting you go. 

and maybe the other reason why rooster went after maverick was because he knew you weren’t waiting for him back at top gun, and he had nothing more to lose.

---

taglist: @n3ssm0nique @alluringshawn @lt-b-rooster-bradshawbradshaw @tayrae515 @luckyladycreator2 @lunamoonbby @altheadarling @marie1115 @americaarse

[quotidian-oblivion]

Grieving please! Sounds angsty so I’m instantly interested

WELL- You see. It is angsty, my sadeek (arabic for friend), BUT. Idk if i still wanna write it or not. So why dont i just post everything here? (Also, tysm so much for the ask, i dont have a mirror rn but im blushing, thank you)

~

Everyone in this family (except Damian) have lost their parents. So write about each of them going to the graves of their parents and describing what they’ve done with the family and how everyone is behaving. 

Bruce talks to Martha and Thomas Wayne.

Dick talks to John and Mary Grayson.

Jason talks to Willis Todd and Catherine Todd (also Sheila Haywood)

Tim talks to Jack and Janet Drake.

Cass talks to David Cain and Lady Shiva (idk if they’re dead or alive, but if they’re alive then she can just be sending a message to them while at her ballet recital or something. And she sees the Waynes in the front row, some with tears, some with not, but all of them with admiration and she smiles, knowing that they feel more family and home than her parents.)

Damian doesn’t talk to Bruce and Talia. He gets an assignment from school to write about his family in an English essay. He scoffs saying that this is child’s work. Jon reminds him that he is a child and suggests he just act as if he’s writing a diary then submit it since that’s what he does. So Damian, at night, writes about how annoying everyone is. Then he hovers and adds a ‘But…’ After that, he writes about Dick and the things he taught him and the times they spent together, he writes about Jason and how they bond and make fun of people and the different ways they can die and how Jason tells him stories about his time as a street kid cuz he knows that Damian secretly loves hearing them, he writes about Tim and how annoying he is, but that he sometimes sticks up for Damian. He pretends he isn’t doing any favors, but Damian once heard him confronting one of the bullies’ in his class and their parents about how he can completely wreck their business and send them shipped off to Madagascar. He writes about how Tim always defends him and blocks bullets and knives from hitting his back (he writes it like a metaphor, but little does the teacher know…) and how he got his brothers to come to dinner more often after he saw him eating alone. He knows it was Tim cuz everyone except him was sending secret glances at him the whole dinner. He writes about how he and Cass playfully fight and spend time together drawing and how she sometimes teaches some of her ballet moves. He writes about Bruce and how he thinks he failed as a father, but the fact that he’s alive and functioning, especially as someone like him (a vigilante) deserves more credit than given. He writes about Alfred and how he feels like he’s his real grandfather. 

Finally, it’s Alfred. This part is really short. But he’s in the kitchen, pretending to prepare the roasted chicken, but secretly listening to the dinner bickering. He smiles, glad that he stayed in this family. 

~

Ik ur not in the fandom, but im not sure if u know the characters, but i hope u get at least the gist of it. I legit ranted about this (as all of my fics start), but then later when i came back i was like "hmmm, eh, idk" so. Ye.

Thanks again for the ask, amigo.

[nerves-nebula]

why did your parents homeschool you when they didn't seem to have an interest in teaching you?

Sorry but this ask has me in hysterics cause like,,, I DUNNO, ANON WHY DID THEY????

Ok but fr, from what I can tell it was a mixture of not trusting public education, wanting direct control over what we learned, being bad at teaching kids, and then just kind of getting too busy and giving up. Like our mom did teach us how to read, right? But she kinda got … i dunno, bored?? tired?? Near the end?? So my youngest sister really got screwed in that department and needed tutoring.

I have a lot of memories though where we’d go somewhere like my brothers baseball game and she’d pull out different work books for each of us while starting on a reading lesson with another one of us. So, like, she DID try. I have way too many painful memories of frustrating homework to say that she didn’t try to teach us anything hah. she just didnt teach us very thoroughly, especially about things she assumed we'd just pick up eventually (like time, dates, and months)

Also, my dad is a philosophy professor with multiple degrees who heavily values the education of his children. But I don’t think he’s good at teaching kids, and he didn’t even live with us most of the time. So while he supported the whole thing and would administer science tests (AKA have me read a science text book and then take a test on the chapters I read) he wasn't super involved, from what I can recall.

Wanna know the funniest part tho? Home schooled kids tend to test higher than publicly educated kids. And despite the gaps in our general knowledge and downright educational neglect at times, that’s still the case for me & my siblings.

My brother got insane math scores, I’m talking better than 90% of his peers. And I always scored particularly high in English. my worst subject was math but i never failed anything. i had a breakdown when i got a B in my first ever semester of high school, because to me that was basically failing since my mom said it isn't that hard to get A's :/

my oldest sister has a theory that we're all autistic because we all kinda act like it, haha. which might explain why we didnt realize, cause if all of our siblings are autistic then its just normal to us.

but ALSO: we all have at least one thing we're insanely good at. my oldest brother was fantastic at math (before he self sabotaged but idc about him so whatever). my oldest sister is a wonderful writer and has a fantastic rate of success when she sends out her writing to be published, my other older sister is incredibly smart with math & science and is trying to become a doctor (she also makes all her own clothing and is really good at crafting). i got accepted to every art college i applied to, with scholarships & everything. my younger brother is one of the top football recruits of his year in our entire state. and my littlest sisters skill set is harder to describe, but the gist of it is that she's really good at manipulating people and lying. not sure where she's going with that but she's probably gotten hundreds of dollars of free stuff from people and she enjoys acting. excited to see where she goes cause i genuinely think she could do anything she wants to haha.

ok but now im just ranting about how cool my siblings are. THE POINT IS THIS- as much as I was neglected educationally, I think my parents accidentally did something right: I think they accidentally unschooled us, because our education was NOT as strict as some of the other home schooled kids I met.

my theory is that the neglect/accidental un-schooling kind of led to gaps in knowledge around things i didn't NEED to know to live day to day life (I didn't NEED to know the months or days until I went to public school. before that, I'd just ask mom what day it was, or else just go along with whatever she said we were doing that day)

BUT on the flip side! It also led to me and my siblings basically developing highly practiced skill sets based on our personal interests. and also kept our desire to learn relatively in tact, compared to kids who had the curiosity to learn beaten out of them in middle school with mind numbing homework hahafsdfadf.

OK SO I've clearly gotten away from your original question, anon, apologies but this sparked something in me and i HAD to ramble about my theories.

[sophieinwonderland]

YEAH the new person saying the endo community is a cult is so weird like heh?? im gonna try to paraphrase their comments so you can get the gist of what they say without anyone going to attack them since they are a cult survivor and i can understand why they think that endogenics are a cult, but... it's just projection imo

they see the term sysmed as terrible and say using it is a cult tactic because it compares sysmeds to transmeds (even though if u think about it for 3 seconds it's like hold on, maybe there IS a connection between between two groups of people who think the only way to experience there personhood-related thing is through suffering. who knew!)

they think being pro-endos are brainwashed and programmed to believe a certain "niche" way of thinking, which is really really silly when the "way of thinking" is "hey maybe there are other ways of being more than one person other than trauma"

theres one exerpt of a post comparing plurality to scientology and saying that endogenics think that plurality makes you a better person compared to singlets / that dissociation/identity disturbances/internal voices aren't disordered at all / are not symptoms at all. when that is factually entirely incorrect, they can be symptoms of problems and no system is better than any singlet just by being more than one person

"they actively target the mentally ill and instill fear towards them seeking treatment" as if sysmeds aren't the ones making us feel more fake and less deserving of disordered-system resources

also them repeating the idea that people think alters arent real people but soulbonds/endogenic headmates are real people, which isn't true (many alters are real people and some endogenic headmates may just be parts / not full people)

also them claiming that most endogenics are white, middle class americans with religious/christian trauma??? they used screenshots from SAS to "prove" their point which is really strange- (and also making fun of people "bastardizing other cultures" right after... like maybe, some of the people who are "bastardizing" cultures might just be engaging in their own culture? or be engaging in something so disconnected from the original concept like tulpamancy, that many non-actively-syscourse-engaging buddhists dont care and don't mind lol)

also also them reblogging from sweet-sloths-sys making fun of someone asking for money, which is the literal ONLY "pro-endo" that i've seen act like that. it's embarrassing. like we blocked that "pro endo" the moment we saw them they are just as bad as any sysmed we've seen lol no one whom i know is pro-endo agrees with their bullshit

them saying endogenics have MADD and not plurality??? what the fuck lol

and more but im getting a headache scrolling through their blog lol

and yk maybe i am looking too hard into it but when we've had moments when we were fixated on cults (especially this one youtuber who talks about a certain cult a lot), comparing that to people going "hey maybe my perspective on life isnt the only perspective, science doesnt always account for personal perspective" and supporting endogenic systems is... weird.

yeah, sure there are a LOT of cult-like behaviors in certain endogenic groups, but to call the entire thing a cult is very strange, and honestly downplays the actual cult behaviors in the sub-groups which should be talked about.

but me saying "hey maybe plurality isn't inherently a disordered experience" isn't fucking cult-behavior! at least compare this shit to the BITE model or SOMETHING lol

Thanks for the rundown!

they think being pro-endos are brainwashed and programmed to believe a certain "niche" way of thinking, which is really really silly when the "way of thinking" is "hey maybe there are other ways of being more than one person other than trauma"

Another thing that bothers me about this is that by this logic, any belief that's not mainstream could be considered a cult. That includes a ton of smaller religions. It could even include the MOGAI community, since xenogenders are still pretty niche themselves.

And I too am SO curious where their endogenic demographics come from! It sounds like they just made them up.

them saying endogenics have MADD and not plurality??? what the fuck lol

I've seen this take several times, and it's just total medical misinformation.

If you have daydream characters with a will of their own who takeover your body, those aren't just daydream characters. Switching is not a normal symptom of MADD. (Although MADD is often related to plurality.)

[apathetic-arsonist]

mkay ive thought about this particular hank headcanon quite alot so now you can join me in my horror vortex vvv (long-ish post ^^")

so uh the headcanon im talking about is the fact that i fucking chopped his arm off, uhm now this raises 2 main questions

1)why cant they just re-attach it?

well if we go by the example of hanks jaw then they cant replace parts of him that are like. completely destroyed. bisected? just bring both pieces back it'll be fine! (relatively) exploded? gather up those wimble pieces in a trash bag! we'll put him back together! almost good as new!

there were no pieces of hanks jaw to get back so they can't fix it. shrimple as that!

2) what happened? this ones pretty simple and ive explained b4 so

the gist is basically yah rember when audi replaced the arm tricky ripped off in ep 11? yeah no audi didn't just do that out of kindness (of course not why would she?)

remember when audi seemly caused jeb to vomit blood in ep 8 (lets assume her watching jeb on her computer and that was related). that. but instead of affecting the lungs since it can enter through the open wound tricky created it causes like gangrene-ish effects

and im sure you know the comon. historical. treatment for gangrene.

okay yeah well if it kills them just bring him back whats the big deal?

well like basically every time wimble has died its been an external cause ( guns, explosions, swords) but infections are internal and if ya dont remove whatevers causing the internal issue then well revival wont be very effective will it?

so basically since hes got fucking gangrene squared triple antrax tuberculosis or whatever we can count that arm as being. completely destroyed. so uh. too bad so sad?

ANYWHO if ya read that thanks! i suppose. i def coulda explained that alot better but ehhhh (this has been in my mind for ages this is essentially thought vomit and will probably be completely ruined next episode but. fuck it we had fun didn't we? (well i did i dunno about you))

[fiddlstyx]

I would love to know more about the groundhog day au in general! Theres not really anything about it on the discord or anything from what i could find

@bttf-dork

oh boy! ok so, the basic gist is that marty basically accidentally breaks the space time continuum is such a way that on tuesday, november 12th, 1985, he gets looped. the "groundhog day" aspect is only the time loop part, i just like groundhog day so i named the au after it.

its been a bit since ive thought about this one, but if i remember correctly the reason he gets looped is partially because it's the anniversary of the lightning strike and partially just the universe messing with him. much like how phil, in the movie, only get unstuck when he becomes a better person with out any alternative motives (thats how i interpreted it at least) marty only gets unstuck when starts believing in himself, or something like that

like, by this point hes gotten over the whole chicken thing but is still in a very much "if I dont succeed in this (get a record or something like that) then I suck", so it's only when hes able to work through that mindset that he gets unstuck. the problem, however, is that he doesn't know this and so spends so many more loops trying to get and spiraling that he isn't able to work through that.

the first few loops are spent with a slow dawning realization of the time loop, and that it is actually continuing and is not just a one time thing.

next many are used trying to get out. doc pretty much immediately believes him every time, so they spend loop after loop theorizing about why it's happening and how they can fix it, or actually trying to fix it. none of these work however

eventually marty gives up on being able to stop the loops and enters a depressive state. these loops range from being to go to school normally, to not being able to get out of bed, to purposefully running away and getting into extremely dangerous situations just to experience something new. some of these things even end with him getting killed (rip), though he's always able to come back

there are some days where he confides in jenn about the looping, or reveals to his parents all his time travel shenanigans. these days usually go pretty good. he has stopped telling doc about it because he's almost completely lost hope in ever getting out and going to doc with only get his hopes up farther, just to be shot down again.

it's after one of the loops where he talks to jenn when he finally begins to look on the positive side of his situation. im not exactly sure how it will end, other than when the loop finally breaks he completely breaks down and is unable to go to school. he then spends a lot of time talking to doc about it, adjusting to things being able to change and just working through everything that happened.

anyway! thats the basic gist of the au! some other fun facts is that his alarm everyday in the loop is "i got you babe" (like in groundhog day) but his alarm the next day, when the loop breaks is "back in time" (like in that one spn episode)

here's the janaury drawing too, btw

[kulemii]

i got really mad at myself because i felt like i was a shit writer since all i put out was smut and i felt like i was incapable of making anything else. i felt like i boxed myself in and didn't hone any reputable skills. i suck at describing shit. i dont know my characters. my mind felt so blocked up all the time. i know there are things that i put out that people seem to like but i feel like i'll never be able to top those things. my abandoned projects? 10-Nen for example, i was going through hell writing Fun & Games but i told myself that i was doing it for me. to try to get a good grasp on the way i write kiryu but no one would find it even if i did post it. so i did. and then the comments came. and OF COURSE they were flattering, i dont wanna diminish that but they made me hold what people like about my stories under a microscope and i tried to do more of that and once i started doing that, it all stopped coming to me

so i said i'd forget about what people say and go back to what i was doing before, writing to better my skills (or whatever i can call it) and yet nothing came to me. i was always worried that no matter how much effort i put into it, it wont be as good anymore, people wont like it anymore. and it stopped coming to me.

so i said forget about what people say, forget about getting better, write to understand the characters and the worlds i create for them. and then i felt every single thing i ever knew about them all dissolve before my eyes and every single character became a stranger to me. if i wrote in that state, it most definitely wont be good enough.

so i stopped. i told myself that i was done with writing. i would try to finish this one big project and sure, if i sporadically get the motivation to work on other things, i'd cross that bridge when i got there- but intentionally writing? i said that once doal was done, so was i. forget the wips. no more from me.

but then i stopped being able to work on doal because it no longer came to me. this was the one thing that i was working on that felt like it was going to be good. the one thing that i can do and i know for sure no one else would care enough to scale, but now i dont even have that.

i talked to my therapist a little while ago about these thoughts and she was pretty much like "you know what? you seem to operate on a scale of Good or Bad. in life but even your hobbies. what if you made decisions based on what you like instead of whether it's going to result in something good or bad. what if it wasnt so black and white? what if you just let yourself have fun. enjoy yourself?" that's basically the gist of what she said. i dont have a direct quote lol

since then I've been thinking about it on and off and im like damn, i stopped liking writing a long time ago. and it was because i always felt that nothing i could make would be good enough. but if i did just write to indulge in myself, to explore MY fantasies, to just have fun, maybe everything else will just fall into place?

for at least two and a half years, I've been lying to myself saying 'oh i write for me. that's why i dont take requests' but it wasnt true. when i was writing i was always thinking about if You Guys would like it and i was keeping parts of me out of my writing because i didnt think it was going be Good Enough for You. but im done with that. the truth is, i'll never know what you guys want. unless im opening the door for that dialogue but i dont take requests. i need to get back to thinking about me. writing for me. enjoying my craft for me and saying to myself 'if no one else likes it, fine because i love it.'

if, when i can do that, I'll go back to loving what i do. and everything else will come naturally. be it smut, fluff, a multi-chapter drama or even a fucking fake game that no one but me cares about.

i cant wait to get there

[i-am-a-freg]

are you down to explain how the french revolution started? and maybe where the whole cake eating thing came from?

INDEED THANK YOU ANON(and I am SO SORRY I am horrid at checking my ask box, please forgive me and I love you)

Soooooooooo. This will be a little wacky and not entirely clear because I’ve forgotten some people’s names so forgive me lol.

It all started maybe a century or two before the French Revolution happened, when Jesus appeared to this little French girl(Margaret Mary alacoque i think?? If I’m wrong I’m so sorry don’t quote me on that) and the gist of what he says is this: I want to shower blessings on France and the king, tell him to put my Sacred Heart on his standard(or like his coat of arms or whatever I don’t know names of things) and to dedicate France to my Sacred Heart. So bestie goes to the king who is like. Nah.(side note wth bro. God comes down and you’re like nah??? The heck is wrong with this king)

anyway so that was (probably) Louie the somethingerother probably because they were extremely creative with their names. Fast forward to the American revolution. Now, all these dudes are aight. We love them for fighting for the freedom of our country yada yada but there’s a problem. They kinda suck. Like half the founding fathers are freemasons(which is a whole other kettle of fish), and by half I mean more like all of them. Except John Carrol. Or maybe it was Charles Carrol Idr. They were cousins tho one of them was the first archbishop of America and the other was the only catholic dude to sign the declaration yknow fun times.

Anyway im getting distracted. So then we’ve got mr Lafayette from France, who went to France to get supplies for our dear revolutionaries and brought them back, from our dear French king. Idr which one it was but the point is he got aid from the French king to win this revolution against the British. Lafayette goes back to France at some point after the war, and this guy fans the flames of the communist revolution in France(it’s literally always communists starting bloody revolutions I swear). Like, against the guys who just helped him in america. Talk about a backstabber. Now I’m a little hazy on the details and I’m not sure entirely how the revolution was begun because your girl has forgotten(sorry), but I DO know that Lafayette was instrumental in it so screw him.

And dearest anon, onto the famous “let them eat cake”. Before we go onto that let’s talk about the lovely girl who was supposed to have said this. Marie Antoinette was married off to this French kid when she was like 14 or 15, she was a catholic and the lavish immorality of the French court was something she obviously didn’t approve of. But she figures that this stuff is her responsibility to deal with and (in some ways) take part in, especially since bestie has got like the entirety of the French court pressuring her.

Anyway TLDR she’s a lovely little girl thrown into this cesspool of French aristocracy and feels like she needs to fit in.

Then over in America at some point, we have frickin Benjamin Franklin, who most likely did not have a high opinion of Catholics, French people, and definitely not royalty. the rumor of Marie Antoinette saying “let them eat cake” came from that bastard(pardon my French). And so now everyone thinks that Marie Antoinette was just a disgusting hussy who didn’t care about anything but herself and how much she could take from the poor peasants of France.

I’m not gonna pretend that the French court wasnt really gross and SOMEthing needed to change, but the revolution murdered everyone from tiny children to their beautiful innocent queen, while American founding fathers mocked or ignored them. Or in Alexander Hamilton’s case, though we should help the revolutionaries. Anyway I could say a lot more about that but I’ve already talked too much lol, so thanks for the ask!!!