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#And actively have things they want to talk to me about that we're both interested in
x-adoringvoid-x · 27 days
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Apparently that's called the 'irresistible force paradox'
#oc f/o#f/o art#fictional other#self shipping#self insert#oc#original character#they're patient with me#also I finally draw Hadri with a different form!#I want to do more with their shape shifting but I haven't made much that turns out well#small vent in tags upcoming if you don't want to read#Feeling bad about posting but I shouldn't just give up#In some way social media isn't for me because I take things too personally#but if I'm going to meet people I have some common ground with I don't know where else I'd look#common ground with something that means something to me#I want to meet people that don't suck to talk to#And actively have things they want to talk to me about that we're both interested in#Tired of being just ears.#I'm talking about my family here not anyone on the site btw#I just wish there were people who wanted to talk in the same way I want to talk#same level of energy I guess#Sorry to vent in silly drawings but it is what it is#Fun fact if you read this far...Hadri would like Evangelion#I don't know why that came to mind today but it makes total sense#They're a deity-like person so religion is interesting and they'd be drawn in by the drama#I honestly don't know how they'd examine media since their setting is basically medieval so Hadri's never really watched anything#Maybe a play?#I'd be nice to know what Hadri would think of things I like#But my tastes are very colorful... watched Ind/go Park for example and have it stuck in my head now#Popp/ playtime and Ind/go Park seem to both be going for fnaf Portal and I am feeling something
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milk-breadx · 7 months
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with a ring pop, i'll get down on one knee - m. s.
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mike schmidt x gn!reader
Fluff! ??? to Fiancés?!
A late night trip and you three stop by a convenience store. Abby finally gives you two the push you needed.
word count: 1,440 words
warnings: movie spoilers?
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"Okay, okay, okay. 80's or 50's?"
"Really? These are the best options?"
"We've been here for a while, I think we've exhausted all other interesting options." You reach for another bottle of soda, opening it and letting the fizz settle down before taking a sip. "Now, pick,"
The two of you were perched on top of the trunk of his car. Very late at night, the nearest landmark being a nearby convenience store where you bought some chips and drinks to enjoy while you wait 'till you both weren't feeling droopy to continue your road trip. Abby, sound asleep at the back seat, who said she wanted to "stay up with you guys", was very eager to go on this trip. Especially since she rarely gets to go out with you and her big brother. Poor thing fell asleep and you didn't have the heart to wake her, so Mike stayed to watch her while you went to purchase some refreshments. Now, at the back of his car, you two talked nonsense for what felt like forever.
"Uhh, the latter." He takes a chip from the bag and eats it, all the while your eyebrows furrow at his answer. 
"Really?" The tone was laced with disbelief and you eagerly wait for his defense.
"What? You'd rather pick the 80's?"
"Uh, yeah? against the 50's who wouldn't?" You playfully nudge him on the shoulder, unknowingly bringing up his memories from his last job as a night guard at the pizza place. Your eyes widened when the realization hit you. "...Oh."
"Idiot." Mike flicks your forehead and you raise your palm to cover it after he does. You remembered that morning at the hospital when you received his call and rushed there only to find him injured, officer Vanessa unconscious, and Abby scared to leave his side. You could've sworn you almost passed out after hearing what happened a few hours before.
Ghost children possessing robot animals? Murderer who wears a yellow bunny suit? It all sounded funny but the serious looks in their eyes and their very REAL injuries made you believe them. Since then, you've been more active in helping them out. Whether it be moving in with them to help with the bills and keeping Abby company while Mike's out to look for a job or planning something for the three of you to enjoy, all to get them to recover and forget the whole ordeal about the pizzeria.
So now, 7 months after the incident, Mike got a job, and you both saved up some money to go on a trip for the weekend.
"I didn't realize! Sorry!" You sheepishly replied and Mike gave a small laugh. That moment made you pause for a bit. Mike had no time to relax for a long time, so it was refreshing to see him smile and laugh.
"When do you think we should get going? It's probably midnight by now and I am dying to sleep. Y'know? While you drive us the rest of the way there." He says and you playfully rolled your eyes at him.
"Hey! You said you were gonna stay up with me like I stayed up when you drove!" Mike shakes head and continues eating his chips. 
"No, no, I don't remember making that kind of agreement." A playful smirk starts making its way to his face. "I do recall you insisting to stay awake with me even though I said you should go to sleep," This little-
"Yeah! Because we're traveling at night, can't have us end up in a ditch somewhere?!"
The car door opens and shuts. Turning around, you see Abby rubbing her eyes as she makes her way towards both of you. Mike calls out to her and helps her sit in between the two of you.
"Why didn't you wake me up?" Her droopy eyes turn to you and then to Mike.
"You looked like you were deeply asleep. Sorry, did we wake you?" Grabbing a cold bottle of water, bought specifically for Abby, you tried opening it. Noticing this, Mike grabs the bottle and opens it before handing it to his sister. You whispered "I loosened it for you" to him before Abby speaks again.
"No. But are we there yet?"
"Not yet. We stopped here because we were getting sleepy and wanted to rest for a bit before we go." You handed her the plastic bag that had 2 bags of chips left for her to pick. "You excited to be there already?"
She picks one from the bag and opens it, grabbing a chip and eating it. "Yeah. Can we go on more trips soon?"
You and Mike share a look, unsure how to respond, so he answers for you. "We'll see, Abs,"
She doesn't respond to that. Instead, she asks you another question. "Are you going to keep staying with us? I like when you're around."
"Of course. I'll be here until Mike kicks me out." She chuckles at your response before turning to Mike. "You're not gonna kick them out, are you?"
"We'll see, Abs."
You playfully glare at him and he shrugs. 
"Why don't you two just get married?"
Abby continues to eat, unaware how her question sounded to the both of you, but aware of your unique kind of friendship where borderline lovers was the most appropriate thing to actually call what you and Mike had. The fumble of words from you two comes quick but Abby doesn't take back her suggestion.
"You two have known each other for years and we've been living together for months now. I know you two have arguments sometimes, but you always work it out." She whispers the last part but the both of you hear it clear as day. "Plus you said you like each other-"
Two voices yelled out, "Abby!" You and Mike look at each other, the realization setting in that she's right. When you two looked away, silence ensued. Mike was the first to speak. "Maybe...maybe marriage... is too..."
"Fast?"
"Yeah,"
Abby's smile grows but she's tired of waiting for the two of you awkwardly fumble your words and just wants the two of you to get together. Yes, she's noticed the way you take care of her and Mike and how Mike takes care of you. How the house has been much livelier with you around and how well the three of you have been since living under the same roof.
Mike's also noticed how much better the two of them have been since you've gotten closer to them. He can't deny he's embarrassed but also flustered when the parents of Abby's classmates mistaken the both of you as her parents--A story for another time. He's open to the idea. Looking back to the times you two stayed up to watch some popular sitcom that was playing on the TV or messing up a new dish you three wanted to try, Mike really felt at ease those days. And the fact that Abby loves you too is an added bonus.
"Just propose already! You can get married years from now, just ask them already!" Abby grabs his shirt and you laugh as you see her futile attempt to shake him. 
Mike sees you and realizes he loves you. He cherishes you and wants nothing more than to see you smile and laugh over and over again. To be part of your life for the rest of his.
"Okay, okay, Abby stop." He grabs a hold of her hands before looking at you. "Will you-"
"You already don't have a ring, at least get down on one knee!" You laugh again at Abby.
Mike sighs and is ready to get up and down on the ground when he quickly runs to the convenience store. You and Abby share a look of confusion until he returns, unwrapping something in his hands. You couldn't see what it is until he got down on one knee and presented it to you.
He says your name softly and you get down from the trunk in front of him, smiling at the ring pop he's proposing with. "Will you marry me?"
You nod, giving him a small yes and let him put the ring pop on your ring finger. Too excited, Abby gets down and hugs you both so hard, you three almost topple over. But none of you cared. Abby was happy to see you and her big brother finally get together. Mike, relieved you said yes and was willing to be with him. You, happy to have these two brighten up your life.
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I swear I was gonna finish that ushijima fanfic first but plans have changed and I have a new husband(a whole series was planned out in my delulu head)-
work by milk-breadx. DO NOT COPY/REPOST/MODIFY WORKS WITHOUT PERMISSION
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arkhammaid · 4 months
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— ˚₊‧⁺˖ THE LIGHTNING ON TRACK | THE STRATEGY CALL
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fandom. formula one & mcu
about. in which the stark racing f1 team talks about the 2025 strategy and beyond
content warnings. written in 3rd person
word count. 1.4k words
notes. with this chapter i wanted to involve a bit of politics and 'realistically' explain why stark racing won't immediately win a wdc (because with the whole set up, it would be possible). f1 are politics and no matter how many drivers say cash is king, connections have sometimes more worth
"welcome, everyone. thank you for tuning in", greets tony with a big smile on his face, spreading his arms as if going in for a hug.
"as you can see, i'm not currently with any departement, i'm doing the finishing touches in my own lab back in new york... since i don't want to drag anyone here to the US for meetings, we will proceed like this until january next year."
"now, i know it will be annoying with dragging your equipement with you and it's also unsafe, since you know... data secrets bla bla- so, in the next few days, each stark racing employee will receive the so called 'tactical intelligence glasses', which you can see me wearing. it's voice activated and can only be used by the one who sets it up, which will be you!" while speaking, tony fiddles with a pencil in his hand and starts walking around in his lab, showcasting it to every viewer.
"to cut things short, you'll receive a tutorial on how to use these glasses and set them up once you receive them. if you ever lose them, don't worry, we can track them. destroying them is pretty hard, but please don't try to make it a challange... our plan is to use them not only during meetings but also during the race, to keep our data from the cameras. with netflix, paparazzi and other cameras from the news, it's easy to steal data that shouldn't be accessible."
"alright then", he ends his ramblings with a clap, "we're going over the interesting part now. let's talk strategy..."
y/n let's her father's voice wash over her, her own glasses perched on her nose and feeding her constant information. in front of her are two holograms, projected by the hologram table in the meeting room she's currently in. the standing figure of her father and the presentation he's currently rattling off, all of it in a glowing blue.
next to her sits kevin, her future teammate, exhausted from the long 24 season but still paying attention. the rest of the room is filled with their team, the race engineers and trainers- each of them having their own glasses on.
to outsiders it looks like they're clowns, but it's a common sight in stark industries. decades ahead of the general public, stark stands for the future. of course they're trying to push it to the outer world, selling hologrammic equipement to both the industry but also private customers, but it's a slow progress.
the marketing team of SI hopes with their public use of the glasses and other devices they'll attract more customers, leaving the age of apple and samsung behind and instead welcoming the age of holograms. powered by starkanium, the production of phones, tablets, computers- anything really, is much cheaper and enviroment friendly than what's currently dominating the market.
shaking her head, y/n focuses on the presentation again. of course she knows it by heart already, she helped writing it, brooding over the strategy with the team ever since the team got announced.
"... the plan is to finish between 5th-3rd on the construction championship. not higher, not lower. we don't want to place higher, because this is our testing season. we will be practically sandbagging from the beginning, not revealing our true power for 2026."
yes... the construction championship. it will bring in money, not that they would need it, but it will justify the expenses they're going to make during the season to prepare for their second one. y/n is under no illusion, if they want, they could go all out and snag at least p2, if not p1. maybe she would even get her world championship- only then for everyone to say she won because she's driving a stark machine and not because of her own skill.
it sounds arrogant, she knows. but y/n believes, no, she doesn't only believe, she knows, she is one of the best in the whole world. if she can go against her father in an iron man suit, who can be only piloted by less than ten people in the world... winning in an f1 car is nothing.
but they've already made enemies for not waiting until 2026 like audi, 'enemies', who have much more pull within the motorsport world than them, simply because they're already established. christian horner is one, followed by toto wolff, the iconic red racing team not far behind.
with they're entry, they didn't make friends on the paddock, so for their first season... they can't be too good. or else their future seasons will be ruined.
it's stupid, to think like this, to think so far ahead, to think of others, in a sport where winning is everything. but it's not. cash and connections influence everything you do, how far you succeed. they have plenty of money, but are practically poor in connections. heck, even haas is better established than them.
they won't be, not after they're done after their first season. they will show the world, what stark racing is truly made of. and y/n will prove, that a woman can win.
"-bought data packs from previous seasons, dating back a whole decade, from mercedes and aston martin. cost a pretty penny, but data is everything. not to mention, after the big leak that happend in the middle of the season, we managed to grab enough data on all teams to calculate 3523 outcomes to this season. points, standings, anything." kevin wheezes at the number, which is followed by several data sheets. he gapes at the calculations, which predict another world championship for max 2064 times. all from the data they managed to collect.
"insane, right?", y/n whispers to kevin, who turns his head to her. his wide eyes make her snicker.
"welcome to stark racing, mate. just you wait until JARVIS and FRIDAY start feeding in new numbers and information." a muttered 'holy shit' is the only answer she gets and y/n has to snicker again. toto wolff once said something about formula one being war planning... well, he should know that stark industries and it's most brilliant minds know everything about war. be it on the market, by income or an actual alien invasion.
"we want to achieve at least one win, be it in a proper race or sprint, three podiums per driver and at least two fastest laps. and it will be possible", her father continues, pointing at a hologram of their car. it spins lazily in a circle, showing off it's aeorodynamic curves.
"this car is faster than the rb19, goes on par with the rb20. we don't know the upgrades from red bull, but another year and we can pretty much predict their stats for 2026. newey is predictable, all his upgrades point towards the perfection of the car, he focuses on what to make better and not invent something completely new. and if he does, he takes ages to prove it's better than what they had before. newey is brilliant, but he's no stark." there it is again, the facts of their rivals, taken apart and put back together to summerize their data in a few simple words.
"so, our motto for this season is testing, collecting data and improving for the next season. we're sandbagging, we're restricting ourselves. so if we ever do bad... we all know we could do much better. the engineering team will send first comparisons between the SR-1 and SR-2 out next week, y/n has already tested both cars in the sim, so we will have some data to read off."
"so, with that, we're pretty much done. thank you everyone for listening, i know for some it's very early right now, so if you have to read over the spark notes- JARVIS has put a summary of the most important information together, you'll receive the mail right after this converence. thank you again and welcome to stark racing, everyone!" claps fill the room and y/n takes off her glasses. it's exhausting to play mindgames like this, to calculate the desired outcome, but it will all come together.
hopefully, with her as a world champion, with the bold stark name on her back.
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taglist. @lilypadlover , @adorablezhui , @peqch-pie , @keyz-writes , @obsidianjewel , @aimixx , @themercyverse , @lem-hhn , @akiraquote , @kiiyoooo , @nichmeddar , @nothingfuninthislife , @minkyungseokie , @fionaschicken , @lyrasconstellation , @spideybv28 , @keii134 , @starssfall , @tpwkstiles, @fangirl-dot-com , @nichmeddar , @lady-laura-speaks , @nikfigueiredo , @hinamesgigantica , @brakingboundaries , @almostjollypizza , @yoremins , @raizelchrysanderoctavius , @celesteblack08 , @watermelon-sugars-things , @lighttsoutlewis , @radiantdanvers , @vellicora, @sterredem , @hiireadstuff , @jolixtreesunn , @mypage-myfandoms , @nelly187 @greeneyesandsunshine , @fulla02 , @welovediaaxx , @whyamireadingthis , @67-angelofthelordme-67 , @blueberry64857959 , @winchesterwife27 , @six-call , @skywalker1dream , @mellowarcadefun , @cherry-piee , @peterholland04 , @motorsportloverf1 , @renarots , @msbyjackal , @woozarts , @leclucklerc , @yl90
crossed off tags mean i can't tag you!
DO YOU WANT TO JOIN THE SERIES TAGLIST? please leave a comment on this post or send a non anonymous ask!
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ARKHAM MAID 2024
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7ndipity · 1 year
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Dating Yoongi headcanons
Yoongi x Reader
Warnings: swearing, lil suggestive, not proofread.
A/N: Alright, if we're gonna do this series, then it's time we talk about my ult. The man, the myth, the meow meow(I'm sorry Yoongi)
(Also, I'm already planning a pt.2 for this series that's more on the crack side, so if anyone wants to send me headcanons for the members to possibly be included in future lists?)
Masterlist
Requests are open
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
Dating Yoongi is comfortable.
So soft for you, I can't even begin. Like, I don't understand how people ever think he's cold, he is the epitome of soft boi.
Blushes when you complement or brag on him.
Turns into a scrunched up, spluttering mess if you call him cute(we love our tsundere).
Very cautious at first with his feelings, but once he feels comfortable enough to open up, he's very straight forward.
To call it dating is a bit generous though. Like, y'all immediately go from 'kinda dating' to 'married-but-not-married'.
Tells you he loves you for the first time in one of those long ass, 3am texts like he sends to the members.
Random,(half-)joking proposals(Marry me, Yoongi uno reverse card!)
"What kind of ramen do you want?" "Marry me." "Both it is."
So many songs about you, but you will not know until they're released(or he makes them into a playlist/mixtape for your birthday or anniversary)
Actually really hesitant about letting you in his studio(sorry fellow writers). He just prefers to have a level of separation between his work and you.
Dates are usually pretty chill(except for special occasions or when he wants to flex and rents out a whole fucking skating rink for y'all or smth)
Another who lives for domestic activities with you, like cooking together or even just grocery shopping. Idk, he just likes getting to be with you.
Probably would love going camping with you in one of those little camper vans.
Likes to teach you things?
I mean, he won't want to be your full time teacher, but if you show an interest in smth like piano or producing, he'll get a kick out of teaching you the basics.(let him teach you about basketball, he'll lose his gd mind)
Not big on nicknames(big shock🙄). Like, you have a perfectly good name, why not just fucking use it? Also calls you 'Jagi', but that's if he's feeling particularly soft or needy.
Acts of service King.
Have you eaten? He's making food. Are you cold? Makes you take his jacket. His top priority is making sure you're taken care of.
Gets lowkey jealous of Holly getting too much of your attention. "Yah, are you dating me or my dog?!"
Sass and bickering are basically a second language for you two.
Subtle about pda. If he's not holding your hand, he has to have one resting on your back.
SOMEONE HOLD HIS FUCKING HAND FOR THE LOVE OF-(sorry, I'm calm)
Not always vocal about wanting physical affection, but when he is, he's lowkey dramatic.
*laying on the couch*"If you don't kiss me, I'm gonna die." *kiss* "Better?" "Hmm, still in critical condition. Keep going."
Another who gets more than a little enjoyment in winding you up into a flustered mess, and is smug about it(again, shocking no one, I'm sure)
Slow, lingering kisses as he holds onto you like you're the most precious thing in the world.
Gets really quiet if you fight(and sulks), but is usually the first to apologize because he absolutely cannot stand y'all being mad at each other.
Holds you to go to sleep.
"Marry me." "M'kay."
Okay, that's enough delulu for right now, Imma go cry.
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itshype · 1 year
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How I Met Your Brother (DC x DP)
Dan joins the Justice League - not as part of his rehabilitation, but as a reward for doing so well.
Tucker makes the grave mistake of mentioning Dan in front of Jazz. And as an eldest sister myself I would not be happy about an alternate version of my sibling being left completely alone in the world, no support, no family to then be turned into a psychopath. And I would be furious for them to then be imprisoned - not for life but for all time?
However, unlike me, Jazz is the world's foremost authority on ghost psychology. She has Dan out of his Thermos and in a larger enclosure within the week.
Now, a lot of fics have Jazz as a magical therapist who can say a few sentences and make any bad guy cry. Sorry, not today though.
First, they resocialise Dan like a feral cat (solitary confinement does make people get loopy), sitting outside his enclosure and hanging out, doing homework etc. This sort of gets him to figure out emotionally that he's no longer in the timeline where everyone he ever cared about died.
Danny discusses with him how many nightmares he's had over just the idea of losing his entire support network the way Dan did and he can't imagine what he's been through. But no emotions are not, in fact superior to having negative emotions.
After a few months, he decides that he does in fact want to actively try and get better. He goes to a therapist (because family members can't do therapy!!!) who's just unhinged enough to get a kick out of counselling a ghost from an alternate timeline.
There's only one relapse. Clockwork fixed it and they don't talk about it.
A month or so later they let him out of the enclosure for good. They offer to symbolically destroy it but Dan thinks they should keep it just in case.
While Dan's humanity has returned, his actual human half is gone forever. But he's interested in doing something with himself. He can't get a GED, or a degree, or be an astronaut. Maybe something in entertainment?
Tucker makes the grave mistake of mentioning that the Justice League headquarters are in space. Dan isn't as powerful anymore now he's no longer a halfa, but he knows he's handy in a fight. He loves space and due to having them repeatedly and ineffectively implemented against himself - a deep knowledge of international war tactics.
NGL, this isn't where I thought this story was going. But Dan is now an international politics, war policy and foreign affairs expert, I guess.
He helps a fair bit on the team, but his key contributions are his encyclopaedic predictions of how different international communities will react to events. If an out of control meta in Paris takes down the Eiffel Tower, he predicts which countries will immediately 'crack down' on their superpowered citizens - that sort of thing. It's invaluable for their PR team and young meta safety.
He's a friendly guy, doesn't judge anyone for losing control of their powers or going 'too far' on a villain who hurt their friends and family. And he never shuts up about his kid brother who is apparently also his best friend. He briefly mentions a baby sister he's never met and that makes everyone pretty sad.
He doesn't consider this Jazz his sister. He's already had a sister named Jazz and isn't looking for a 1:1 replacement. This Jazz is more like a mum-friend. However, he never had a Danny or an Ellie in his last life.
"My little brother told me about the trick to this level in Doomed 17, want me to explain what you're missing?"
"Sorry, I really can't possess you, even for 'anti mind-control' training. That isn't how overshadowing works, you can't become immune without exposure to ectoplasm in dangerous doses. No, I can't get you some pure ecto, my baby brother would kick my ass to hell."
"Yeah, my baby bro and I both wanted to be astronauts, I died so it's not in the cards for me anymore, but he has a real shot still, we're all rooting for him!"
Most Justice League members think he's a dead eldest brother with living siblings he's still in close contact with.
It's all fun and games until he tries to take a bullet for Batman during an ambush and it's actually an amnesia ray designed to make Batman forget about a specific case until the bad guy can complete his plan.
"I killed you all before, and I will do it again."
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WIBTA if I tried to covertly exclude one of my friends from game nights ? 🎮🎧📞
tw: disordered eating, self harm
I've got a discord friend group of about 15 people though only 10 or so are regularly active and game nights often are usually around 6 people but they rotate who participates often. We're all in the 20s and mostly nonbinary / genderqueer / trans one way or another. I'm 25 ftm personally (they them) and the friend this is about in particular is 22mtf (she/they).
Friend is really excited to hit the 1 year marker in her transition and loves sharing how excited she is about her progress - how strangers at her job are gendering her correctly more and more often, how her cup sizes are growing, how much weight she's lost, wardrobe updates, getting to learn girl things from their very supportive mom, etc etc etc. It's all very exciting, I remember hitting my 1 year marker and i'm genuinely really happy for her.
The thing is I struggled with disordered eating in the past. Several others in our friend group have as well and it's something we've talked about both in related and unrelated convos to this issue. Friend keeps an excel spreadsheet with her measurements from bust to hips to weight and will update us frequently whether we've expressed interest in hearing the exact numbers or not. Exact Numbers was one of the things I kept track of and hearing her tracking them (for very different reasons) will often set me off and i'll start taking more and more unhealthy actions, falling back into disordered habits.
Friend has adhd and very poor impulse control. She often joins conversations and talks over people, completely changes conversational topics on a dime, or forgets who is in a call at any moment and brings up someone's triggers. She'll almost always apologize if someone mentions a social mistake she's made, but because the weight/food intake/number watching is so important to them as a way to track their transition it's the one thing that keeps coming back and back and back. I and the others have tried talking in voice calls, mentioning in text chats in the group and even DMing her but because of the topic and this group being the friend group she feels safest in (we were all the first to know and hyped them up on the hrt journey) these are some convos she only gets to have here
and because of the topic, i feel rude or embarrassed when I have to say "hey can we not talk about this right now or i'm gonna have to leave". So on most nights if it comes up I'll just deafen / go afk / just zone out entirely until the conversation has passed. If it doesn't seem like it's going to or they are so in depth that it's genuinely triggering a self harm response i'll fully leave instead so she can keep having her fun and get excited
Game nights are different though
I'm usually the host of game night and so can pick when we play our silly little games. Obviously people can and do still hangout and do things together Not on specific game nights, and we all do, but game nights are my thing. We play party games over discord or multiplayer competition games or lately have been getting into games like content warning and lethal company when there's 4 or sometimes 5 of us (either someone wants to hang out but only watch or we rotate around who plays round by round)
Friend is often working in the evenings and so bc this is an online friend group they don't actually know my work schedule. We usually only have about half the total number of participants be around for game night anyways, so I've been thinking of occasionally lining up game nights for nights when she's mentioned being busy by saying i work the other nights - but only sometimes. I do really like friend. She can be so much fun to hang out with, excitingly competitive and with interesting knowledge to share and generally a good sport no matter the actual game we're playing. But sometimes the worry about the triggering and the trigginering itself are too much. sometimes i just can't handle when she does it and knowing i can't leave and asking her to stop expressing her joy makes me feel like an asshole anyways so i don't want to be around it.
To be clear. I do not think they are an asshole. Friend is genuinely one of my friends. I like her and hanging out with her. they do not trigger me (or any of the others w this same trigger) maliciously. this is solely would I be the asshole.
TLDR: My friends way of tracking her transition sometimes triggers my eating disorder. would I be the asshole for planning game nights that I host and cannot leave / tune out conversations during so that she cannot attend as often in hopes that I am not triggered as often?
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candlewaxandp0lar0ids · 7 months
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How to Leave Comments on Fanfiction
So, I recently made a poll to know if people might find it helpful to have a list of things they could talk about when leaving comments on fanfictions, be it on Ao3 or on here. A majority of people were interested in seeing the post so, well, I'm making it. I started writing and posting stuff online when I was a teenager, on a website where leaving constructive criticism was the norm. It's by far the place where I've gotten the most feedback and it was an incredibly formative experience for me as a young writer — and it taught me how to leave detailed comments.
Writing comments doesn't necessarily come easy. It's something that you may need to learn how to do, but the good news is that you can learn how to do it, so don't worry if you don't know what to say at first. Hopefully this list will give you some pointers on how to do that.
This is more or less the list I go through when I want to leave a detailed comment. Even if I don't have a specific idea at first, I'll go through the steps and I never come out empty-handed.
Comment etiquette:
What became apparent with the poll I made was that a lot of people worry about how they'll be perceived by the writers if they leave a comment. Now, obviously, writers aren't a monolith, but 99% of the time writers will be thrilled that you took the time to leave a comment to let them know what you enjoyed in their fic. I cannot stress this enough. We're not going to judge someone based on a positive comment they leave.
As it stands, on Tumblr and Ao3, it's seen as rude to leave negative feedback, unless the author has explicitly asked for it/agreed to it, so that's what I'll be going over here. Since quite a few writers did say on that post that they would like to get constructive comments as well, stay tuned, I'm trying to get something together to do that for authors. Other than that, you're good to go.
The main ways to let an author know your thoughts on a fic on Tumblr are:
reblogging a fic with your thoughts underneath it
reblogging with your thoughts in the tags, which is often less formal
leaving a comment as a 'reaction'
sending in an ask if they're activated on the blog (which means you can stay anonymous, if anon asks are allowed)
Reblogging means that your followers will see the post as well, and is therefore really appreciated on Tumblr.
As a note, you may find different systems work for different fics! Maybe leaving tag rambles works for you when commenting on drabbles, for example for me it's the system I use to leave comments on smut.
General advice:
Everything I'm saying in here is for people who want to be able to leave longer/more detailed comments and don't always know where to start. If, for whatever reason, you're not comfortable or you don't have time to do it at the moment, a simple "I love the fic, thank you for writing it" always goes a long way for an author.
The key thing to keep in mind if you're trying to find something else to say, I think, is to try making the comment specific to the fic you're leaving it on. It shows the writer what you took away from the fic and the fic's strong points, which is both meaningful and helpful to an author.
Comments don't have to be long to be meaningful. Don't stress about writing a ton; a one-sentence comment highlighting the fic's humor or how emotional it made you can be incredibly impactful.
With this out of the way, I'll go through things you can talk about in a comment, starting with what I think is the easiest and moving on to things that could require more thought. You don't have to do all of that. You may never use some of the things on that list. Leaving comments should not be a source of anxiety. So take what you want from the list, maybe come back to it if you need more inspiration, and don't worry too much about it :)
Favorite line(s) : pull from the fic to let the author know what your favorite line was. If you wish, you can expand on that by saying why it was your favorite: did it make you laugh? Did it make you feel something specific? Did the author nail the characterization with it? Was there some incredible metaphor? Did you find it beautiful or poetic even if you can't go into detail? Is there one line in particular at the beginning of the fic that hooked you in and made you want to keep reading?
All of that is very valuable for a writer to know. Some of my favorite comments I've gotten were a list of a reader's favorite lines from a fic with one or two sentences to explain why they liked them, so don't hesitate to do that more than once if you can!
Emotions:  if there’s one thing I know about writers, it’s that we’re thrilled when we’ve made you cry. So tell us: how did the writing make you feel? Did you laugh out loud? If you did, was it the dialogue, or the narrator? Did it make you cry? Which part? Could you relate to one of the characters? Did it make you feel seen? Did the fluff make you feel all fuzzy inside or did the angst twist knots in your stomach? This isn't an exhaustive list, and emotions are great to draw from when you're leaving a comment!
Favorite element of the writing: Is there one thing in the writing that struck you as being particularly good, or what was your favorite thing to read? Is the author a master at writing dialogue? Are their descriptions so good you could see the whole scene? Are they really good at getting in a character's head and describing their emotions? Were you hooked from the start and couldn't stop until you reached the end?
Characterization: Now, this might be less instinctive, but if you've been in a fandom for a while, you'll probably be able to identify these things fairly easily. You can tell the author if you think they've nailed one aspect of a character. Did you have a favorite character in the fic? What did you think of them? Did the author manage to capture their voice? Was the attitude spot-on? Which parts of the character, if you can name them? Were there aspects of the character you particularly enjoyed? Did the author shine a light on something you hadn't considered or on something you don't think is highlighted often enough? Is there one thing from the fic you can actually picture/hear a character doing/saying in your head?
Style: I'd argue this is the hardest part, and you shouldn't feel bad if it's not something you can really comment on. As someone whose first language isn't English, I know I struggle with it. Style can be perceived as the way the author's voice comes through in the text. It can come through in punctuation, in the way sentences are formed, in the choice of the words themselves. If, when you read, you feel something intangible that doesn't fit well in the other categories, it just might be the author's style.
Here are some things (non-exhaustive list, of course) you could say about an author's style: it can be direct, straight to the point. The author doesn't bother with ornaments. Every sentence feels impactful. Maybe the writing feels intense. You're overwhelmed by the characters and their feelings and you feel truly engulfed in the story. Maybe the style is light and airy. It's so easy to read you don't even notice you are reading. Maybe the writing is intricate. Going through it is like piecing a puzzle together, sentences are foreshadowing and metaphors reveal deep truths about the characters. Maybe the style is rich. While not always the easiest, it's a pleasure to read through it, the author has a wide vocabulary, and you might want to compare it to a well-written novel.
If you identify specific elements of that style (metaphors, interesting use of punctuation, etc.), don't hesitate to point them out and let the author know you enjoy them!
That is it for this post, hopefully it doesn't look too daunting — again, you absolutely do not need to do all that in any comment, but maybe going through this list can help you leave comments for authors you enjoy.
I like to end my comments with 'Thank you for writing and sharing this with us', so I'll tell you thank you for reading, I hope this was helpful, and please consider reblogging if you'd like to save this or if you think it could help someone else!
As a bonus, my friend @elidebrey and I (but mostly her) made a 'checklist' for commenting, to help remember all this if that's something you'd like, so use at will!
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A big thank you to @elidebrey, @yoongihan and @antoniorhinothethird for their precious opinions on this ♥
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sysmedsaresexist · 11 days
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We're curious, since you apparently were anti-endo in the past Was there any specific event or conversation or experience that got you to start contemplating the idea you might have been wrong? I know you've mentioned talking to a buncha big name docs and going "okay I think I'm on the wrong side of this debate" but what got you to the point of even bringing it up with them in a genuinely open minded way? We think its an interesting topic for people who've escaped any kind of shithead mindset, not just anti-endo stuff, and so we're oft curious what pulls people out of those pits
This has been a loooonnggggg time coming.
I wish there was just one event that did it, if it was that simple I'd be putting everyone I come into contact with into that situation.
I spoke with Kymbra Clayton in early 2021 about her paper, Critiquing the Requirement of Oneness. It was on a bunch of, "proof endos exist," lists, and it didn't sit right with me. I was surprised to find that she wasn’t... quite anti endo, but she was upset that her work was being used to support them. Her paper was specifically about the shift in clinical circles from final fusion to functional multiplicity as a possible treatment goal. It sort of sent me deeper on the anti side, but it made me realize that, holy crap, I can talk to these people???
So I emailed Colin Ross later that year, desperate to prove someone else wrong, and despite numerous back and forth emails, he was completely pro endo. I never spoke about that conversation until I made my post about it... jeez, what, two weeks ago? What even is time.
But from there, I worked through other doctors, pro and anti, from both my personal, professional circles, and anyone else who would respond to inquiries about their work on whatever social media they were active on. Mostly, as therapists, they stressed the importance of understanding and kindness, regardless of personal beliefs.
I ended up helping a lot of endogenic systems learn about DID, and I realized that, wow, shocking, being nice facilitates conversation. As I got nicer, people were more willing to talk to me about their experiences. I saw how many people were really struggling and I realized that I wanted to help them more than I wanted to be right.
I got REALLY goddamn tired of hearing, "we don't have DID," and I realized I had to concede on that point. There was ZERO conversation to be had if I couldn't get my head around that. But if not DID, then what?
The more I heard, the more I shaped my own thoughts and understanding, the more I broadened my academic searches (wow, there's more terms to Google than just "DID trauma"), and the research was just overwhelming.
I wanted so badly to see the Stanford Tulpa studies fail that I actually started to enjoy the other work of the doctors involved (specifically Tanya Luhrmann, Michael Lifshitz is a little out there for me, but he sure is passionate). The more I read, the more I understood what they were hoping to accomplish and prove, and the more I saw ways that this kind of research can help people.
I don't agree with everything, but I'm still excited to see where it goes, and I realized it's okay to have mixed feelings and opinions, as long as I could be respectful about it.
I've been sneaking out endo safe content for about a year now, adding it on as the last tags. I've discussed at length about my changing beliefs. I'm shocked that no one noticed??
But I didn't actually change my stance publicly until the antis turned on me.
With this new round of antis from TikTok, they were posting stuff about DID that wasn't correct. At all. Some of it was disgustingly wrong. I tried to correct them, gave them pointers and resources to use, explained things they weren't understanding. I gave an amazing play by play of how @sophieinwonderland was going to tear their post apart, and managed to get it pretty damn close to what actually happened! That was fun.
And in return, they called me an endo and started an actual smear campaign against me.
(Hi, friendos, another reminder to get off my blogs and block me, please)
It was the straw that broke the back. I had held on the anti label specifically to be able to work within the anti community, but I was clearly not anti, these were clearly not my people, and they weren't interested in learning. Their actions and behaviour were beyond low. I wanted nothing to do with them.
But, I mean, I guess some people noticed my slow shift, because when I did reach out into the endo community just before I made my first Colin Ross post, they were quick to pull me in without question.
The acceptance and kindness that has been shown to me is... breathtaking. I can't think of a better word. The conversations that I've been having with people have been more interesting and beneficial than ever before.
Syscourse needs to involve actual conversation, and I've finally found that on the pro side.
TL;dr I wanted to prove endos wrong SO badly that I accidentally proved them right
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rainbowsky · 4 months
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GG and the Duomo di Milano
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Duomo 2019 (left), 2023 (right) and 2024 (top).
He has posted a photo of it whenever he goes to Milan, since his first trip there in 2019. Here's my CPN on that.
Fake, fan fiction, CPN.
Of course, as an artist and a photographer it makes sense that GG is interested in this beautiful building. Gorgeous intricate architecture that is covered in lifelike statues, no doubt it is very satisfying to photograph. It's truly one of the most stunning cathedrals in the world. But we're turtles, so we're always going to look at things from a slightly different angle.
This CPN first came up back in 2019, the first time he went to Milan. GG said in an interview that he was excited to see the cathedral, and he posted a picture of it on his Weibo account. Turtles at the time speculated that GG was inspired by the photos that were all over the news in 2016, when same sex marriage was legalized there.
It was the location of massive LGBTQ rallies when same sex marriage was being debated and put to a vote, and was the site of equally massive celebrations when that vote won.
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Some people are skeptical of this connection because they feel that the time gap of a couple years is too large for it to be relevant, but to me those people can't possibly understand how significant the same sex marriage fight is to queer people who wish to marry (and who wish to have their human rights recognized in general).
Especially around that time in history, when the fight was at its most active globally. There was a period of a few years where the issue was constantly in the news, as more and more countries were gradually recognizing legal rights for same sex couples. Images of those protests and celebrations were inspiring and exciting for queer people all over the world, and those who cared a lot about the issue followed that news pretty closely.
This is an issue of significance to queer people everywhere, even those who don't want to marry. It represents a shift toward acceptance and toward broader legal recognition of equal human rights for queer people.
Same sex marriage is a huge hurdle toward equality for anyone whose rights are at stake, because most of the opposition to human rights for queer people tends to come from religious groups and conservatives with narrow notions of 'family values'. When societies acknowledge - even on paper - that queer families are legitimate, the biggest barrier has been crossed.
Based on a lot of things I've seen from GG over the years I believe he's very deeply invested in Pride and gay rights. He's not at liberty to be as open about it as he'd like to be, but I believe he shows what he can. I have talked about that in more detail in this post.
I also believe that marriage is something that both GG and DD care a lot about. They are each others anchors in life, and even when they don't get to spend a lot of time together, they are home to each other. DD has also talked about wanting a son, and GG has also shown interest in children and family and often talks about a simple life.
They just ooze domesticity on many levels, and I think that even if it doesn't fit within their lives right now, they probably talk about and think about building a family together one day. And given the culture in China their parents likely want that for them as well.
I talked about the possibility they might already be married in this post. I talked about the possibility of them wanting kids in this post about DD saying he wanted a son, and later in this one from an OOL interview where GG mentioned envying Gu Wei's life.
Both GG and DD strike me as being connected to queer culture, just given some of their jokes, attitudes, etc. and some of the people they're associated with. Even their experience with filming CQL (which I talked about in this post). They're also both from the younger generation in China, which is much more progressive and informed on these issues.
All of this leads me to believe that it's not an accident that this landmark has captured GG's imagination.
The Duomo is also a very popular wedding/romantic photo destination, and where couples often propose.
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I think that it's romantic that GG posted the moon over the cathedral this time. There are a lot of fake rumors and CPN around GG and DD and the moon, and turtles believe that they often send pictures of the moon to each other. They've both posted photos of the moon on social media in the past.
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There have been a lot of posts about their connection with the moon over the years. A few of my favorites are Pie's post from Mid-Autumn Festival, Pie's post about Midsummer Moon (among other things) and of course the LRLG rumor that talks about DD taking pictures of the moon for GG.
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Given what this landmark might mean to GG, it makes this photo even more special.
Or he could just enjoy photographing a pretty building. We'll likely never know for sure.
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m-beloved · 7 months
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Black hair and blue clothes? You must be my type || Bi-Han x gn reader x Kitana || Mk1 intros
In this, you have the role of Liu Kang's assistant/secretary. You help him carry out whatever he needs and accompany him on any business related things. Pt.2 here
Ooc characters, hinted past romance between you and Bi-Han, hinted mutual pinning between you and Kitana, no use of y/n
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Bi-Han vs you
Bi-Han: Why settle for being in Liu Kang's shadow when you can join my side and be greater? You: I appreciate the offer, Bi-Han but I am content with my role under Liu Kang.
Bi-Han: Join me and we shall seize power together. You: Bi-Han, I don't want power nor do I need it.
You: Bi-Han, please stop being so stubborn and see reason. Your brothers miss you. I miss you. Bi-Han: I have no brothers. If you really missed me you would have joined me.
Bi-Han: I don't like seeing you with Kitana. You: She's a good friend to me. I won't give her up just because it upsets you.
Bi-Han: I've heard about the princess of Outworld taking an interest in you. You: We just have a lot in common. Bi-Han: Is that so?
You: I wonder if your touch is as cold as I remember. Bi-Han: Allow me to remind you.
Bi-Han: What makes the princess better than a Grandmaster? You: Bi-Han, it's not like that. Bi-Han: To you.
You: Bi-Han, what you said to Tomas was unacceptable! Bi-Han: It was the truth and it needed to be said.
You: Bi-Han, I miss spending time with you. Can we please just talk? Bi-Han: We have nothing to talk about. You: We both know that's a lie.
You: Kitana doesn't trust you near me. Bi-Han: I could care less about her opinion.
Kitana vs you
Kitana: I've never met someone as interesting as you before. You: I'm flattered, your highness.
Kitana: I don't know if I trust Bi-Han around you. You: He wouldn't hurt me that badly. And if he tried to, I can take him. Kitana: That's not the only reason why.
You: Mileena seems wary of me, especially when we're together. Kitana: She's just cautious. Pay her no mind.
Kitana: I've heard of how close you and Bi-Han used to be. You: I enjoyed his company, but no longer do so.
Kitana: Johnny told me of this Earthrealm activity we could do, it's called a "movie date". You: I've never been on many of those before, but I wouldn't mind doing one with you.
You: Raiden seems to like you, do you reciprocate his feelings? Kitana: Unfortunately for him, my attention has been on someone else for a while.
You: Bi-Han doesn't like seeing you near me. Kitana: The feeling is mutual.
Kitana: As the Princess of Ourworld, I'm expecting to marry someone eventually. You: Would you like me to help you choose a suitor? Kitana: I already have someone in mind. I'm looking right at them.
You: I wonder how sharp your fans are. Kitana: Would you like me to show you?
Johnny Cage vs Bi-Han
Johnny: I've seen the way you look at them. Admit it! You love them. Bi-Han: I hope you fall down the stairs and break your neck.
Johnny: I've noticed something you and Kitana have in common. Bi-Han: Which is? Johnny: Blue clothes, long black hair and liking the same person.
Johnny: So I've been thinking about taking your ex on a date. Bi-Han: They are not my ex, and if you even go near them I'll break both your legs.
Bi-Han: Stay away from them, Cage. Johnny: Or what? Bi-Han: I'll bring your severed head to them on a silver platter.
Johnny: You like-like them. Everyone can see it! Bi-Han: I will drown you in a pool of your own blood.
Bi-Han: If you touch them, I will rip off both your arms and beat you to death with them. Johnny: Woah there! Possessive much?
Liu Kang vs Bi-Han
Bi-Han: You've done nothing but hold them back from reaching their true potential! Liu Kang: They have never shown signs of unhappiness under my guidance.
Liu Kang: They seemed to have moved on from you. Bi-Han: Impossible. Once that princess is gone, I shall be all they think of.
Bi-Han: Release your hold over them! Liu Kang: They have chosen to serve me of their own free will.
Johnny Cage vs Kitana
Johnny: I've seen the way you look at them, princess. Kitana: I have no obligation to tell you about my private affairs, Cage.
Kitana: The movie date went well. If I had known you knew so many courting rituals, I would have approached you sooner. Johnny: Y'know, if you want to make a move on them, I can help with that too.
Johnny: I think they must have a type. Kitana: What do you mean by that, Cage? Johnny: Blue clothes, long black hair and has siblings. Coincidence? I think not!
Johnny: If you ever thought about going on a date, consider letting me film it for ratings. Kitana: I would prefer for my personal life to stay personal.
Kitana: Do you have any Earthrealm rituals to keep any courting rivals away? Johnny: Bi-Han's chilling near them again, huh?
Liu Kang vs you
You: Lord Liu Kang, may I asked how you courted Kitana's counter-part? Liu Kang: I think that is something you should find out on your own.
Liu Kang: I hope Bi-Han and Kitana don't distract you from your duties. You: I would never let anything get in the way of serving you my lord.
You: Bi-Han refuses to see reason. Liu Kang: There is nothing we can do but hope he realises his wrong doings.
You: Kitana seems to be interested in negotiating with me more often now. Liu Kang: Is that what you think she's doing?
Johnny Cage vs you
Johnny: Pulling not one but two? Man, you must be something special! You: Pull what? Cage, is this another Earthrealm slang I'm too old to understand?
You: Thanks for letting Kitana know what a movie night is, I enjoyed our hangout. Johnny: Always happy to play cupid.
Johnny: I have no idea why you like Grandmaster bossy-pants. He has no chill. You: He wasn't always like this. Not with me at least.
Johnny: You have a type, don't you? Blue clothes, long black hair and in positions of power. You: What do you mean by that?
Johnny: I heard Kitana's looking for a suitor. You: Raiden will be pleased to hear that. Johnny: Not what I was trying to hint at, but okay.
Johnny: Can't say I blame Kitana and Bi-Han. You: What?
Bi-Han vs Kitana
Bi-Han: They will never love you. Kitana: What makes you think they'll like you either?
Bi-Han: I will take pleasure in presenting your severed head to them. Kitana: The fact that they once enjoyed your presence bewilders me.
Kitana: I will not let you harm them! Bi-Han: Harm them? I'm going to reclaim them.
Kitana: I don't trust your presence around them. Bi-Han: The feeling is mutual.
Bi-Han: You are not worthy of them. Kitana: And you think you are?
KItana: We've known each other for decades. Bi-Han: I've known them in ways not even Liu Kang is aware of.
Bi-Han: They once told me that I was the first who ever made them consider stepping down from Liu Kang's side. Kitana: I shall be the second and last to do so then.
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A/n: I don't know if I'm writing these characters accurately or making them Ooc. I'll probably write a part two or fanfic with a plot revolving around this, but I'm not sure how it should go yet. Reblog/comment if you have any feedback, want to be tagged in the next part or simply want to share your thoughts. I always appreciate them
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ao3commentoftheday · 20 days
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How do you build confidence as a writer and start to feel okay with your own writing, as well as the stats your writing gets? I’m not a new writer, and I don’t think I’m a bad one, but I am really bad with capturing the fandom zeitgeist, and a lot of the times when I try to write characters based on how they acted in canon, I get accused of bashing them. I don’t care about rude or unflattering comments on my fics, but definitely fewer people kudos my fics when I try to write the characters how I see them instead of fanon characterization, and it sucks to know I don’t make fic recs lists or even get casually recced for anything I’ve ever written on Discord because of my writing choices. More and more often, I feel like I shouldn’t write because I know my fics will never get the praise and attention BNFs do, and then I feel guilty for not writing. But I also know that if I do, I’ll just end up with more fic readers won’t want, and let’s face it: it’s not like anyone will choose my fics when they could have a BNF’s. Is there any way for me to accept that no one will ever love my fic as much as they love fics by BNFs, and to stay motivated in spite of feeling like my writing is just permanently unwanted? Or would giving up at this point be kinder to myself if I can’t stop comparing? (I know frequent advice in these cases is to focus on building friendships and finding a community, but IME, people in fandom either aren’t interested, don’t reach out, or already have had their friends circle since the LJ days and don’t want to bother with you. Any advice on where I’d even begin?)
*hugs* Oof. That's a rough spot to be in, anon, and you're definitely not alone 💗
I think in this situation, you need to figure out what exactly it is that you're looking for. You start by asking how to get confidence as a writer, but I think you already have it. You know what stories you want to tell, and you write those stories the way you want to tell them. To me, that means that you have plenty of confidence. You have a clear vision and goal, and you write with them in mind.
Next, you mention stats but I don't think that's the issue either - except inasmuch as they can be a sign of other things. Stats on their own, however, are just numbers attached to your works. If seeing those numbers on your works and the works of others causes you distress or annoyance or another emotion you'd rather not experience, then I strongly recommend using a site skin to hide them.
The bulk of your message is about what it sounds like the issue really is: attention, praise, and yes community. You want people to get excited with about your works. You want people to talk to other people about the things that you write. You want to feel loved, or at least appreciated. You're not alone in wanting those things either.
I think the writing side of things is going well - at least from the information you've provided here. The part that isn't working for you is the posting. Putting your work up on AO3 is not only dissatisfying, it's actively discouraging you from writing more.
I'm going to make my own suggestion and then I'll leave the floor open for the blog to add in their thoughts: Have you considered role playing instead of fic writing? For the last several years, I've tucked my writing away in a discord server with my fandom bestie. We've written thousands of stories and millions of words, almost none of which have ever been posted to AO3. We don't feel the need for comments and kudos because we're both having so much fun collaborating with our blorbos and each other, writing things to make the other one happy (or sad or laugh etc), that what other people might think about it doesn't actually matter.
She also RPs in various servers with friends and strangers alike, but I haven't enjoyed that as much as just shooting replies back and forth with her. Your mileage may vary, as they say, but that might be one way to get the feedback and excitement that you're craving - whether it's in a big server with lots going on or just a little corner of 2 or 3 people.
What do the rest of you think?
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velvet-vox · 28 days
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V and Doll; trauma, mental disorder, and low empathy.
Very recently on my notifications I received a reblog by @aroaceweirdos101 to a response I've made to a post talking about how Doll went through so much more pain than V, and it made me realise that the response in question was actually, like, really good.
I had genuinely forgotten and underestimated how good of an analysis of both V, Doll, mental health and societal stigma it really was.
Now, of course, I disagree with the sentiment that Doll suffered more than V and fully believe that out of the two V endured way more pain and trauma than Doll; yet, although the responses in the comments checked out with what I previously said, they felt... meaner?
Like, the answers went to the opposite extreme of the original comment and tried to downplay Doll's trauma in comparison to V's, almost implying that Doll was a b##ch (which she was) for snapping as hard as she did when V still managed to retain a sense of restraint; and I disagreed with that, so in response I wrote this:
*Look, I believe both Doll and V are interesting characters, and although I feel more sympathetic towards Doll, I definitely believe V went through so much more pain than Doll and had way more reasons to snap and be the way she is now, but I just really hate people who use that as an excuse to label Doll has the more evil of the two or "she was always just a psycho, she just needed an excuse to snap"; it's especially disheartening when people straight up interpret her as unreademable or pure evil, when V and N's body count is 10 times higher than Doll's.
Also, I'm sorry but I really can't stomach the possibility of Liam redeeming the genocidal war machine and not the broken orphan created by said psycho, it literally would be the fictional pinnacle of "since these are the protagonists, they can get away with as much as they want and are always in the right"; I'm fine with the way Doll died because it was done by Cyn and there wasn't any moral lesson to be gained from our protagonists about it, but if it was done by N, Uzi, or worst of all V again, it should have played out like "we have reasons to do the things we do, and you have yours, unfortunately we're on opposite sides and you are hurting us so we must kill you now".
The human (worker drone) mind is extremely fragile, and some people, due to a probably inherited and undiagnosed mental illness or a particular personality type, are more at risk of snapping then other people, yet instead of being understanding towards those who are born with more issues than others (especially women, look up Azula or Ashley Graves) we tend to isolate, demonize and then kill them because they were incapable of fitting into the larger societal standard of acceptable social behaviour, even when said society never did anything to help them meet its unreachable standards because it required too much work from society's side to give you the special attention you needed in order to make you work and fit in.
V was a quiet kid because she was shy, Doll was a quiet kid because she was introverted. Those are two very different types of people and one of them (Doll) was inherently more at risk of developing mental health issues than the other due to their personality type and how it's stigmatized.*
Here's also the original post made by an anonymous user on @md-confessions
Also, here's the link to another post still talking about V and Doll. I made two comments in response, but neither of them is particularly well thought out and since you can't correct them I left them as they were.
Now, back to the highlighted part:
I want to use this response as a springboard to talk about the main differences between Doll and V when it comes to their different handling of their decaying mental health and why it's unfair to say that one of them was worse than the other based on their actions and attitude towards the problem.
(Also, all of the Murder Drones characters are extremely complex, and the fact that the show doesn't have filler makes it harder to get a good grip on one's particular mindset, so if it seems like I'm talking more about Doll than I am about V, it is because V is the most complicated character in the cast and I'm not as confident to talk about her as I am with Doll; it took one entire year to finally understand Doll as well as I do now, so V is a touchy subject for me that's why I might not do her justice).
First of all, it has to be said: Doll is a sociopath, V isn't, despite appearing like one. And that's ok.
When I say that I feel more sympathy towards Doll than I do for V, this is what I mean: I don't sympathise with Doll heartlessness more than I do with V jackassery; rather I understand and relate with Doll's low empathy since I also have low empathy as well, and it is quite common for people like us to be misunderstood for uncaring individuals.
It's the same reason why I and many others tend to like villains and sympathise with them more than we do with the heroes (Lord Shen from Kung Fu Panda 2 is the perfect example for this); it's quite common for villains to be written as individuals with low empathy, as an highly empathetic individual tends to be harder for the audience to buy as an antagonist, since you need to justify why someone this caring is committing all this heinous and terrible stuff, but if that person is already unemphatetic by nature, than it's just a matter of establishing their goals and motivations. These people also tend to be ostracized by their environment and go through a gruesome and violent death because it's socially acceptable to let these despicable individuals find comeuppance through death since they lack the traits that make a person traditionally good.
So, when people use the "So what? She's got dead parents. Many others do, including Uzi, who's also infected with the Absolute Solver, yet they have not become cannibalistic serial killers obsessed with revenge" as a slight against Doll it's not entirely fair because from what we've gathered in the show the other worker drones don't suffer from sadistic impulses and sociopathy like Doll does, even if they (Rebecca) are pretty uncaring. (Side note, Uzi also suffers from sadism/sadistic impulses, but not from sociopathy, hence the main difference between the two).
V, on the other hand, despite what her introduction and psycho girl persona might trick you into believing, was never a sociopath nor did she struggle with low empathy, she was, instead, a pretty timid maid who suffered through unspeakable physical and psychological trauma that led her to adopt this fake identity to cope for the atrocities that she was now committing for the company (Absolute Solver) and the safety of N; V cared about N in a pretty normal person kind of way: she kept N at arms length and hid the truth from him so that he wouldn't get hurt, all while detaching herself from the actions she was now committing, not saying Doll wouldn't or didn't commit any of these actions, but V did them in a way that better aligns with someone who doesn't suffer from sociopathic disorder.
Speaking of N, since he has been mentioned, I'll say that while Uzi suffers from sadism but not low empathy (she has shown to be pretty empathetic many times), N doesn't suffer from sadism but from low empathy; as better explained by a section of this post made by @melissa-titanium :
N x Doll
Don't believe me? Then maybe you should rewatch the series again because N's unemphateticness is his own can of worms to delve into.
But back to Doll, it's time to dissolve (😏) one of the oldest misconceptions surrounding her character:
Doll reached out for help. A lot. She just didn't have any luck with it.
Call me crazy, but the more I thought about it, the more I realised that the fandom wide spread belief that Doll rejected all the help that was handed to her to be a massive lie, and in fact, Doll actually tried to reach out way more than you thought, arguably, even more than Uzi:
The impact that Yeva's education has had on Doll's life can only be noticed in this way: Yeva extended her hand to Nori and she accepted it, thus, it is fair to assume that Yeva taught Doll to be pretty open to others and to give a hand to someone in need (the show was rewritten after the pilot, so ignore the incongruences with Doll's initial characterization), and in fact, after enduring the trauma of watching her parents die, she opened up to Lizzie for help and support, unfortunately, Lizzie wasn't exactly the right person to talk about these things (no offence to her, all of Uzi's classmates suck for one reason or another, including Uzi herself, I guess that's what happens when you are stuck inside a bunker your whole life), after all, Doll was still killing and cannibalising her classmates.
Then, before she went back to gain her revenge, she tried to get Uzi on her side, which wasn't an attempt to open up, but she was still willing to connect, even if for the wrong reasons. Finally, once she discovers that Uzi also has the Absolute Solver, she promises to help her out, and at this point, Doll wishes to talk it out with Uzi, but because she is surrounded by the Disassembly Drones (V), she can't.
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And now, for the most interesting discussion, there's this brief and frankly weird moment in episode 5 where Doll compliments Khan for raising Uzi, and while Khan laughs it off immediately, since he is a dumbass, this could have been a perfect opportunity for him to reach out to Doll and reason with her, since she's clearly putting aside whatever her objective actually is to talk to him, but he doesn't catch on, and this leads Doll to immediately closing herself off again and returning to the mission, and like, maybe we all kind of underestimated how much significance this moment carried, but consider this:
Doll, at this point in time, has been living out in the cold for what... a month? Six months? A YEAR? If we exclude J and Cyn from the equation, this is probably the only social interaction she ever had since The Promening, yet, because of Khan's lack of touch, she immediately reminds herself of the massive disconnection between her and the other workers (eh ehm sociopath) and thus storms off rapidly; this moment is actually quite painful when you look at it from this perspective, yet it's also, the only interpretation that makes sense? Otherwise how do you explain the existence of this moment when Murder Drones is a show infamous for his high plotting and lack of filler? They had to go out of their way to animate this, so why did they play it off in this way?
Tessa is a meanie
Penultimately, and again, I want to bring up a post by @capnsaltsquid since that's where I got the inspiration to write this paragraph off, Doll opened up to J and Tessa to get the answers she was seeking, yet not only Tessa shot her in the face for s###s and giggles, but then proceeded to fraternise with her parents murderers, and at this point, she closes herself off enough to realise that she might have to unintentionally kill Uzi and leave everyone in the dust if she wants to get anything at all.
But unfortunately, that is not the case, she dies of a lonely, meaningless, gruesome death, and at this point, she still tries and finally succeeds in reaching out to Uzi, and yet, like all of her previous tries, this is unsuccessful, as Uzi has other things in mind right now.
To wrap things up nicely, both V and Doll went through severe amounts of trauma and handled said trauma in a similar yet also different way, since they are different individuals who process emotions and love differently, thus the actions they took made sense for the person they were and should only be judged in the context of their writing and characterization.
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protectingtulpas · 1 month
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So I just got sent that pretty iconic "anti-tulpa" document and I think it's pretty damn funny that a lot of those sources, if you actually READ them, are neutral or even supportive lmfao.
Like for this one? This is straight up pro-, and is just explaining that "tulpamancy" isn't the original concept and that it's based on other practices. Congrats, you're making our fucking point for us!
This next one is pretty interesting also. I wanna highlight some stuff from it, from both the op and comments.
Let's talk about my existence in contrast to some of these statements. The first one is "The biggest, most dangerous form of evil in Buddhist thought is "ego" or self-grasping. If ANY mental phenomena increases your self-cherishing attitudes (self importance, grandiosity, jealousness, craving, hatred, self-loathing, self-absorption etc) it's evil. IF a mental phenomena causes greater flexibility, less attachment, more tranquil emotions, less mental chatter/discursive thinking, increased generosity and compassion toward others, higher mental clarity etc.--that's good." And the second one is "If it increases negative emotions, it's not Dharma. If it decreases negative emotions, it's Dharma." So these are great for some people, but that mentality of not allowing "self-cherishing attitudes" can be EXTREMELY HARMFUL FOR SYSTEMS and ANYONE with self worth issues. A lot of this is contradictory for a lot of people. Something can both decrease negative emotions and make you feel connected to yourself. Nobody has the right to make us feel any less like ourselves - normally you can believe whatever you want for yourself, obviously, but pushing it onto other ppls' lives aint cool. The implication that we're straight up DANGEROUS just for existing is insulting to created systems regardless of whether you're using the word tulpa or not.
The reply to that by @/eeveecraft is great, and this part describes how weird that is in the context of headmates' identities here. "Furthermore, really don't like how you downplayed tulpas as property there, buddy. Tulpas are not property, they are people in every sense of the word, and I don't [give a] flying fuck about whatever complications that for your beliefs. My systemmates are people, full stop. I was already able to tell since you refer to your own systemmates as "imaginary friends," which a lot of tulpas aren't okay with being called that because that implies that they're fake. They are NOT lesser because they're not created by ancient monks or whatever.
"Like, seriously: "They would be considered "as real as you and me," with their own likes and dislikes etc," because apparently, modern tulpas don't have likes and dislikes and their hosts just see them as delusions? Say that to my tulpa, Arcanus who adores coffee while the smell makes me nauseous, say that to my systemmates who switch with me and have their own hobbies. Also, tulpas are more than just personalities. They have their own experiences, skills, preferences, dreams, memories, thoughts, a person is more than just their personality, and I thought a "licensed psychotherapist" would know that, especially if they have systemmates of their own." Make sure to read the full comment tho cuz it's a good takedown, it's not just about that it goes thru the entire thing.
SO! If anybody actually wants a well-studied paper outlining everything, check out Tracking the Tulpa: Exploring the "Tibetan" Origins of a Contemporary Paranormal Idea by Natasha L. Mikles and Joseph P. Laycock. It goes into a lot more of an accurate and in-depth history on the subject, and the bibliography ACTUALLY shows where things come from.
All that document showed us was that Buddhists are a wide community with a variety of different people with different skill levels, understandings, and opinions. And that we need to ditch the fantastical, impossible representation of the tulpa in supernatural media because that's ACTIVELY harming people. Which is what we want to show people! So congrats!
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I feel myself having so much less patience these days, and I don't like it.
Patience and compassion and kindness are things that must be cultivated like tender plants - they grow by the inch and die by the foot.
Seeing into someone's heart is something that takes a little effort, but the way to do it is by reframing your outlook, like you might adjust your vision to see through water. There are layers to a person, and you have to look past what they say or do on the surface in order to get to their true motivations.
And it takes patience and holding space for people, because they are used to operating in an unsafe environment. It's like when you go to the pond, you're not likely to see frogs right away. You might need to sit quietly for a half hour before the frogs re-emerge and float to the surface. But once you see them, suddenly there are frogs everywhere! You just had to wait until your mind allowed you to take them in. People's vulnerabilities and intentions are the same way. You might need to wait a while until the person is sure you are safe to be around, or they might have been exhibiting all of those vulnerabilities and motivations pretty openly; you just couldn't tell until you knew what you were looking for.
This gets much, much harder to do when you yourself don't feel safe, especially when you aren't (or feel like you aren't) being seen as human. You also (obviously) must see the other person as equally human to yourself, or this doesn't work. Perhaps a broken, deeply flawed person; but a person nonetheless.
I work in the domestic violence field, and so I end up talking to a lot of abusers in my professional life on behalf of my clients. I've found that it helps a lot to be kind. Why? Not because it's deserved, but because it's unexpected. They come into the situation ready to fight and argue, and instead, I speak to them kindly and explain why what my clients are asking for is in everyone's best interests. This seems to deflate them pretty immediately. They come into the situation thinking I'm the boss level for "fights with my ex (or whatever)" and then I listen. I take them out of earshot of my client, I let them vent (which helps me figure out what they actually want) and then I patiently explain our position and how we're offering to resolve the situation. And you know what? It works. A lot of the time, they were expecting me to treat them like a monster. But they're not a monster; they're a person who has done some inexcusable and horrific things, but they remain a person. I think about both my abusive exes, and the truth is that they're both people I loved, and loved for a reason. I wouldn't want someone else to hurt them (even if it was in cruel words only) just because they hurt me. Sometimes, the abuser is the father (or mother) of the client's children. There is typically always anger, but what good does it do for me to vent that anger for my client? Who does it help? Nobody. If we can't agree, then fine. I will do my job of asking the tough questions without mercy. But before that? Far better to de-escalate if possible.
Another conflict resolution thing: you have to remove the aggressive third parties that are angry on one side or the other's behalf. They tend to aggravate the party and escalate the situation by talking in the person's ear and saying how unfair this is and generally making it about their own feelings rather than problem solving.
But here too, finding out where the third parties who have involved themselves in the situation actually want is critical to diffusing this as well. They are people who are righteously (at least in their mind) angry on behalf of one of the parties because they love them and this has activated their protective side. And sometimes people really do need an advocate, yes. But sometimes (a lot of times) these third parties actually get in the way of de-escalation and problem solving.
All of this requires patience, effort, cultivation. And I work hard to do that. But lately my patience has been worn thin by too many people seeing me as subhuman, and it's really starting to wear on me.
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judesmoonbeauty · 27 days
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Alfons Sylvatica Chapter 2 - Semi-Summary
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This is a fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors and translation inaccuracies. This is a SEMI-SUMMARY of each chapter. I am roughly translating this with out much research other than specific lines from certain scenes. Why? Because it's a huge task to translate a main route chapter line by line. So, this is what we're working with, and I appreciate your understanding ♥︎ Cybird owns everything. Re-blogs are appreciated, but please do not post my summaries elsewhere. Minors: Please DNI or consume this content. CW: Dub-Con. Dividers: @/natimiles
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Kate wakes up the next morning and finds a shirtless Alfons sleeping next to her in bed. She freaks out and wakes Alfons up in the process who says, “Oh, is it morning already? Good morning, Kate.” She recalls how he came to her room the night before, kissed her and then they went to bed, but no lines were crossed at this point because he knew her body was too tired, but even so did they do other activities that only “lovers” do….she wasn’t sure.
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Alfons: Did you have a good dream last night?
Kate: W-wha……from where….
The blurry line between dreams and reality were a shock to her, the fear from last night and the pleasurable kiss they shared was so real, but it still felt like a dream and she couldn’t help, but feel upset. Alfons laughs at her in amusement, and his smile makes her back away from him covering her naked body with the sheet.
Kate: Wow, did you do something to me?!
Alfons: Yes, I did. I did a lot of nice things.
Kate: I didn’t mean that…..!!
She frantically tries to remember why she thought that Alfons was her lover, knowing there must be some kind of trigger. She has a flashbacks to him in her room and the mission prior to that:
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Kate: Worried?
Alfons: Yes, isn’t it obvious?
Alfons: Because - you are my lover.
Alfons: You’re dreaming. You’re having a very pleasant dream.
Back to the present, she recalls him touching the nape of her neck and him whispering to her in both instances, and then recalls the pile of dead bodies before he touched her. She mentions that he used his ability on her, and surmises it’s the ability to use illusions. He admits to it and then commends her deductive skills while breaking out in applause. However, he clarifies that his ability is to rewrite perceptions by simply touching the nape of ones neck and whisper, and she asks why he did it to her?
Alfons: Why, because…..it’s fun of course?
Alfons: Poor little robin, thrown into a cesspool of evil.
Alfons: You’re the funniest toy I’ve ever seen.
Kate: …..!! (Kate slaps his cheek.)
Kate: Disgusting……
Alfons: I like your reaction, much better than last nights.
Alfons laughs without straightening his clothes and flutters off her bed, and tells her that if she ever wants to cry again then he’s there for her. She screams “No, thank you!” and throws a pillow at him. Afterwards, she heads to the dining room for breakfast and Alfons is sitting their nonchalantly. She wants to turn on her heel, but she resists and takes a seat. Victor starts talking to her about the mission from the night before, and she asks what happens after she was hypnotized. Did they call the police? William explains to her that in East End there have been many murders, arsons, abductions etc. and yet the police chalk it up to something that “always happens in the slums”.
Kate watches the expressions of those around her: Liam & Harrison listen quietly to the information, Elbert looks down melancholically at it, Alfons doesn’t seem interested in the subject at all, and then there’s those whose eyes sparkle with joy…….“That’s where Crown comes in,” says Victor. He explains that rumor has it that the administrators of the orphanage and poorhouse are responsible for the series of incidents. Last night’s mission was a little prelude to gather information. William says that they are trying to uncover the reason all the administrators are banding together; is it money, ideology, or pleasure? “What do you think”, he asks her.
Kate says she doesn’t know and she can’t of a single reason as to why someone would want to do that, as she recalls the scene feelings well up in her chest making her feel like she’s trapped in a dark place. Alfons chimes in, “Well, you don’t need to know. It’s a hassle.”
Alfons: Some children die in this world without anyone knowing. That means there are some who think they’re nothing more than rubbish to be cleaned off the street.
Kate is stunned by such a statement from him, is this a brazen dereliction of duty despite Crown being tasked with such cases? They stare at each other and he smiles.
Alfons: - It doesn’t matter.
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(It doesn’t matter?!)
Alfons: Miss Kate, are you sure? You don't want to hide this.
He taps his own neck and Kate is like, “neck”? Hide what? Liam starts to ask, “Hey Kate, isn’t that….”, and Ellis follows up, “It’s a hickey.”
Kate: What?!
Ellis peeks at her from behind and she covers her neck with the palm of her hand.
Kate: Wh-wh-why....…
Alfons: Well, because……that’s what I did to you, isn’t it?
Kate: …!
Her cheeks flush and Harrison asks Alfons if he’s already touched her? Alfons laughs and asks Kate how he should answer that question, but she is so embarrassed that she can’t say anything. He taunts, “Aw, you can’t say anything?” But, it’s not possible of knowing what really happened last night, and while she is struggling as to what to say, Jude enters says, “What, ya already been devoured? I’m sorry to hear that,” and lets out a loud laugh.
Kate: I’ve not been devoured!
Alfons: That’s terrible…..that you kissed me so passionately, but you were just playing around with me……?
Kate: ….. Weren’t you the one who played with me?!
Liam: Ah.
Harrison: Ahhh.
Ellis: You just admitted it.
Kate: Huh—!?
Alfons: Pfft, ahaha! This is the best, Kate!
Alfons: Victor, will you make her my exclusive?
Kate: What do you mean my ”exclusive”?
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Kate wants the situation from escalating any further and Alfons explains that they’d be partners, buddies, a tag-team or whatever she wants to call it. Victor thinks it’s a great proposal after their hot night together, and Alfons says that he must take responsibility for their one night stand, but Kate doesn’t sense any sign of sincerity in his voice. Victor says that he doesn’t care as long as Kate agrees to it, to which, she declines saying she hates the idea. Alfons threatens her with, “Don’t say! If you do, I don’t know if I’ll do that again or not.” She is upset, but it was also her fault for not kicking him out of her room last night as soon as he entered, and Victor warned her that many members of Crown were morally bankrupt.
William makes the suggestion that Kate only accompanies Alfons on his missions and outside of that, she doesn’t need to be around him. Kate still doesn’t like the idea, but it’s better than being with him 24/7, so she agrees and Alfons says it’s fine.
Alfons: Well…..I look forward to working with you, Kate.
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[Next] [Master List]
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Note
AITA for possibly invalidating a self-diagnosed autistic person
I (20sNB) met D (20sM) in an online server for an anime fandom we're both in. I'm a psychology student who was professionally diagnosed with autism in early childhood. D and I developed a friendship based on having similar fandom opinions. I don't remember how me being autistic came up in conversation but when I mentioned it, he described himself as "autistic as f#ck". Sometimes he would get into arguments with other people in the server and bring up his autism if he was called out on how he spoke to people. On his twitter he said his autism was self-diagnosed and he has no interest in getting a professional diagnosis but he could if he wanted to.
I have complicated feelings on self-diagnosis; I think there's pressure in the autistic community to accept every single self-diagnosed person as valid. I personally would never definitively say I had something that I hadn't been professionally diagnosed with. That being said, I understand that there are factors that would prevent someone from getting a diagnosis so some people *have* to only be self-diagnosed. I don't have a problem with it as long as people aren't spreading misinformation or being actively harmful, which is what I (and others) thought D was doing. My issue wasn't him being self-diagnosis, it was that he was using his self-diagnosed autism to justify incorrect (and harmful) claims.
I noticed a few times that he would make comments like "autism isn't a disability" and "some autistics have high support needs because of intellectual disability", which is just flat out wrong. D also claimed that if he was to get a diagnosis, his would be level 3 autism (which would be for someone with high support needs with severe social and communication deficits, generally nonverbal) but he also is a college student who's been in a relationship for over a year and he works part-time in retail. For context, my diagnosis happened when there was different terminology but my psychologist considers me to be somewhere between level 1 or 2 and I am also studying and working part time.
Another person in the server (let's call them P, also 20sM) brought up a different disorder that they'd been diagnosed with (not autism although P is autistic as well) and D immediately said "I probably have that too but I can't be bothered to do anything about it".
P and a few other people in the server expressed some frustration in a separate group chat about D's tendency to (a) say things about autism that just aren't true and (b) say "omg me too" every time one of us brings up things we have. Once D said autism isn't a disability the third or fourth time we'd had enough and I responded "D, that's not right". D took offense to that and claimed as a fellow autistic person I should agree with him. I said "D, I'm autistic and it's a disability, I call myself disabled because my autism is literally disabling". D said he felt like disabled is a bad word and he doesn't like using it about himself. I said "D, no one's forcing you to use it about yourself if you don't want to, but saying autism isn't a disability is just wrong". P pointed out that every time someone in the server talks about being neurodivergent D is like "omg me too" and P also said that D doesn't get to claim to be autistic while also spreading misinformation, especially when the misinformation being spread is ableist. D got mad at P for calling him ableist; he insisted he's autistic and self-diagnosis is valid. I said "I get that, but when the information you're spreading is flat-out wrong, it kind of makes me question your researching skills".
D called P and I both ableist, told us we were so privileged to be diagnosed (which neither of us disputed but also D *could* have been diagnosed but chooses not to be even though he has the resources to access a professional diagnosis) and we're "f#cking assholes" for invalidating self-diagnosed autistics. D's partner (20sF) also got involved and claimed we were bullying D and we both have "pick-me" attitudes. P and I both muted the server and disengaged for a while.
Later on, D messaged P and I both. D claimed his reaction to what was said was because of his autism. P had had enough and said "buddy, you don't get to say that" and D got mad and blocked P. I told D I was going no-contact and D could block me if he wanted. D called me an asshole and I blocked him.
It's probably worth noting that my autism means that I have difficulty interpreting people's messages in text form and tend to take what people say at face value. Sometimes D getting overly confrontational triggered my anxiety and caused me to feel very uneasy around him since it was in text form and there was no vocal tone to decipher (if that makes sense). The thing is, I don't think D is necessarily not autistic, I just think D has some internalized ableism and doesn't really understand the nuances of the autism spectrum enough to make a sound judgement and he should have maybe not made claims about an identity he knows very little about, but maybe P and I might have been a little harsh because we'd been stewing on our feelings for so long.
What are these acronyms?
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