#Anti-Hero Characteristics

[joncronshawauthor]

The Anti-Hero's Journey: From Ancient Epics to Modern Fantasy

Fantasy literature has long been known for its iconic heroes and valiant champions, but it is the rise of the anti-hero that has reshaped the genre’s landscape. Anti-heroes, flawed and morally ambiguous protagonists who defy conventional notions of heroism, have emerged as captivating figures who challenge traditional storytelling tropes. Today, we’ll trace the evolution of anti-heroes in…

[ecoterrorist-katara]

Nothing about Ka/taang precludes Katara being Chief of the SWT…

which is why it pisses me off even more that Katara didn’t get to have a role of any political importance whatsoever. It wouldn’t change anything about LOK’s storyline, and it would be fully in line with her character.

There’s a common anti-Zutara argument that Katara wouldn’t want to be Fire Lady, because she would want to rebuild and lead her own culture. I am sympathetic to that. Based on her canon characteristics, she might want to be a United Republic Councilwoman, Chief of the SWT, or just generally the Waterbending Master / Matriarch of the her tribe, which would be easier (though not impossible) if she weren’t married to the sovereign of another nation — I get that.

but the thing is…she didn’t get to do any of that, even though “wife of the Avatar” doesn’t contradict those roles. All the things that would be difficult for her to do if she were married to Zuko, she still didn’t get to do as Aang’s wife. She didn’t get to have a career the way her husband, or her brother, or her friends did.

so it’s extra hypocritical when Ka/taang shippers are like “but being Fire Lady would disempower Katara!” when Ka/taang canonically disempowered her! And KA fans are fine with that: they bend over backwards to justify why Katara doesn’t have a statue, or why she wasn’t there to protect Korra from the Red Lotus, or why she wasn’t at Yakone’s bloodbending trial. Yeah she got to live in the SWT — eventually, I assume, because in the comics she just follows Aang around — but what else did she get to do? Fucking nothing, apparently. Because to some people, the greatest honour for a woman is to be the hero’s wife.

[nelkcats]

The Spiteful Ghost

Danny loved space, and loved exploring it almost as much as he loved the Realms (yes, apparently he had made a home there, and learned to love its quirkiness, who could knew right?). The problem was that over the years the halfa acquired another characteristic: He hated heroes.

It might seem ironic, considering his teenager years but he just couldn't stand the concept of heroism (he never chosed to be one), not after all he had been through. Not after losing his family and ending up with more than deep wounds, not after humanity called him a villain for protecting the ghosts, not after the world chosed to sacrifice him after all he did for them (Amity was his world, and the city handed him over on a silver platter to save itself, they forced him to take drastic measures, actions he should never have taken, but when you're alone it turns out that no one can stop you)

They say that rancor can change you, the halfa can confirm. The point is, Danny hated heroes (he hated what they had to go through, hated that adult heroes weren't there for him, hated what it took to be a hero, leaving everything for the world was absurd, why would you accept something like that?). When the ghosts told him about the DC dimension he didn't take it exactly well. Although at least those heroes had a base in space.

Clockwork forbade him to go for a few months (he understood his grudge, quite personal, but he didn't want it to destroy him, he didn't want him to destroy himself), but when he saw him lost and depressed he allowed it, probably because he knew it would cheer him up for a while. Maybe he saw some future where he reconciled with the "profession", or maybe he thought he needed it (the halfa wasn't evil, Clockwork knew he wouldn't hurt anyone).

So, Danny arrived in the hero dimension and set out to be the world's biggest nuisance: moved chairs, ate their snacks, disappeared their stuff. He wasn't doing anything exceptionally big until he overheard an argument between the Red Hood and Batman.

After that, Batman ran out of gadgets in no time and Red Hood found little desserts everywhere. By the time they called JLD, it was pretty obvious they had an invader (the invader strangely loved Young Justice, and anti-heroes, seemed to hate Batman thought).

John Constantine entered feeling that he was walking to his funeral, why the hell had the Ghost King installed himself in a hero base, if it was rumored that he hated them to death?

[hadesoftheladies]

choice feminists consistently misattribute insult. feminist analysis is often taken to be infantilization, and doing so ironically shows a lack of maturity. but by far the most insidious thing about choice feminism is how it perverts the concept of empowerment to the point that women go to war fighting for dogshit treatment. they conflate being respected like a man with being like a man, which totally masks the fact that they are ritualistically disempowering themselves in an eternally rigged game.

bdsm choice feminists will say "pain gives me pleasure and i'm an adult!" and yet your male dom hisses and whines when he feels even the tiniest scrape of your teeth on his member. why does men's pleasure centre around their comfort? is he not empowered because he hasn't rationalized and eroticized his discomfort? why are you the exception?

christian choice feminists will say "i have a right to worship whomever i want" and yet your fellow male observers froth at the mouth whenever god is referred to as she. you see male as neutral and male and female as equal, yet your male leaders consistently do not. female is sexual or domestic. they can't stomach calling a metaphysically transcendent being she. why is "she" the exception? why are female biblical heroes exceptions?

muslim choice feminists will say "i get to wear the hijab" and yet male observers are not treated as inherently provocative for existing. why are you the exception?

female rappers or celebrities and women like them that dress in exceedingly impractical and revealing outfits say "my body my choice" and yet their more powerful and rich counterparts never have to do any of that on the red carpet or in their music videos. why are they the exception?

tradwives will say "it's my right to marry" and it is, but why do so few men marry without an education or job? why are they never told to do it young or quit their jobs to raise their kids? why is no man advocating for men's right to be stay-at-home dads? why are you the exception?

pro-makeup choice feminists will say "i choose to do this for fun!" and yet male counterparts have never once felt a need to shave or decorate their faces to minimize facial "flaws." they can walk anywhere, attend any party or job, without any performance or effort outside of hygiene and basic decorum. why are you the exception?

anti-separatist choice feminists will say "i have a right to pursue romantic relationships with men" and yet the men in their dating pool have zero interest in romance itself and pursue women for very different reasons. they don't risk their lives to date you, neither do they tolerate disrespect or disagreement with whoever they're dating. they don't allow themselves to be talked down to. they don't tolerate anyone they don't find exceedingly attractive unless they want a quick fuck. they don't patty-cake their opinions or tone police themselves or praise women for being women or fanboy about female sex characteristics, especially not for women they don't know. they don't defend the integrity of women. why are you the exception?

instead of asking this question, most of them would rather say that it is feminists that are insulting and infantilizing them for pointing out the way they are being insulted and infantilized by men via femininity and the performance of female socialization.

which makes it ironic. because it is immature for an adult to refuse to reflect on their choices. it is immature for an adult to invest in something they have been told time and time again is unstable and rife with fraud with poor returns. holding onto things that harm you because of peer pressure is something we hopefully outgrow post highschool. it is immature to believe something based on unsubstantiated evidence. to refuse to examine something potentially harmful simply because it gives you comfort.

i'm not going to be complicit in validating women's internalized masochism and misogyny because i refuse to agree with any patriarch on what a woman is or should be.

[writing-with-sophia]

How to write a good Anti-Hero? How to find the perfect balence, lay out a good personality + backstory?

I love your blog so much! Your suggestions are so helpful💕

Writing a good Anti-Hero

I'm glad that my blog can be of assistance to you! Here's a step-by-step guide to help you create a well-rounded anti-hero:

Identify Their Key Traits: Start by identifying the key traits and characteristics of your anti-hero. Consider what makes them different from a traditional hero and how those traits contribute to their complex nature. Are they cynical, charismatic, or morally ambiguous? List these traits to have a clear picture of who they are.

Develop a Compelling Backstory: Create a backstory that justifies the anti-hero's behavior and motivations. Their backstory should provide insight into their past experiences, traumas, or circumstances that shaped their worldview. Consider how their backstory influences their choices and drives their actions.

Establish Their Moral Code: Define the anti-hero's moral code and ethical boundaries. Anti-heroes often operate in shades of gray, so their moral code may be different from society's expectations. Determine what principles guide their actions and explore the conflicts that arise when their code clashes with societal norms.

Flaws and Vulnerabilities: Give your anti-hero flaws and vulnerabilities that make them relatable to readers. Flaws could include arrogance, a short temper, or a tendency to push people away. Vulnerabilities humanize the anti-hero and create opportunities for character growth and development.

Motivations and Goals: Clearly define the anti-hero's motivations and goals, which may be complex and multifaceted. Determine what drives them and what they seek to achieve. Their motivations can evolve throughout the story as they confront challenges and face personal revelations.

Create Conflicting Relationships: Develop relationships for your anti-hero that challenge their beliefs and motivations. These relationships can include allies, enemies, or ambiguous connections. Interactions with other characters can push the anti-hero to question their choices and evolve as a character.

Internal Conflict and Dilemmas: Explore the internal conflict your anti-hero experiences as they navigate their choices and actions. They may struggle with the consequences of their morally ambiguous behavior or question the validity of their goals. Internal conflict adds depth and complexity to their journey.

Moments of Empathy and Redemption: Provide moments of empathy and potential redemption for your anti-hero. Show glimpses of their capacity for goodness or selflessness, even if it's buried beneath their rough exterior. These moments can create emotional connections with readers and open the possibility for redemption arcs.

Growth and Change: Allow your anti-hero to experience growth and change throughout the story. This can involve challenging their beliefs, confronting their flaws, or reevaluating their moral code. Their journey should be transformative, leading to personal development and self-reflection. Remember to demonstrate your anti-hero's growth and transformation through their actions and choices. Instead of relying solely on internal monologues or self-reflection, emphasize how their behavior and decisions shift over time.

Avoid Excessive Villainy: While anti-heroes may engage in morally ambiguous actions, be cautious not to make them excessively villainous or unsympathetic. Give them redeeming qualities or justifications for their behavior to maintain reader interest and empathy.

Consistency and Complexity: Ensure consistency and complexity in your anti-hero's personality. They should feel like fully fleshed-out individuals with nuanced emotions, motivations, and reactions. Avoid one-dimensional portrayals and explore the various facets of their character.

Reader Engagement: Keep readers engaged by providing them with a window into the anti-hero's thoughts, emotions, and motivations. This can be achieved through introspection, dialogue, or interactions with other characters.

There are some questions to help you develop a well-rounded anti-hero with a balanced personality and backstory:

Personality:

What are the defining traits and characteristics of your anti-hero? How do these traits set them apart from traditional heroes?

How does your anti-hero interact with others? Are they charismatic, aloof, or manipulative?

What flaws does your anti-hero possess? How do these flaws contribute to their complexity and relatability?

What vulnerabilities does your anti-hero have? How do these vulnerabilities influence their behavior and choices?

How does your anti-hero handle conflict and adversity? Are they hot-headed, strategic, or unpredictable?

What defense mechanisms or coping mechanisms does your anti-hero employ to protect themselves emotionally?

How does your anti-hero's personality influence their relationships with other characters in the story?

Backstory:

What significant events or traumas from their past have shaped your anti-hero's worldview and motivations?

How do these past experiences contribute to their moral code and ethical boundaries?

Are there any formative relationships or connections in your anti-hero's backstory that have influenced their behavior?

What led your anti-hero to adopt their morally ambiguous or unconventional methods?

How does your anti-hero's backstory justify their motivations and goals?

Are there any unresolved conflicts or unfinished business from their past that drive their actions in the present?

How does your anti-hero's backstory create internal conflicts and dilemmas for them throughout the story?

Balancing the character:

How do you strike a balance between your anti-hero's morally ambiguous actions and their redeeming qualities?

What moments of empathy or vulnerability can you include to make your anti-hero relatable and sympathetic to readers?

How does the anti-hero's moral code and personal motivations create conflicts and challenges for them?

In what ways can you show the growth and evolution of your anti-hero's personality and beliefs over the course of the story?

How do the relationships and interactions with other characters challenge or influence your anti-hero's personality and choices?

What internal conflicts or dilemmas does your anti-hero face as they navigate their morally gray path?

How can you create opportunities for your anti-hero to question their actions, reflect on their choices, and potentially pursue redemption?

Remember, crafting a compelling anti-hero requires careful consideration of their traits, backstory, and journey. Aim for complexity, relatability, and a balance between their morally ambiguous actions and redeeming qualities. With thoughtfulness and depth, you can create an anti-hero that captivates readers and challenges traditional notions of heroism.

Additionally, if you need, you can find the post on villain redemption here.

If you want to read more posts about writing, please click here and give me a follow!

[gleamingyu]

anti-hero.

part II of the midnights series. inspired by taylor swift’s midnights. part I

pairing: music-producer!seungcheol x lawyer!fem!reader [exes-to-lovers]

genre: angst. fluff.

warnings: she/her pronouns for reader (but no specific physical characteristics). a bucketload of angst (i'm so sorry). light cursing. terrible knowledge of law stuff. so much crying yikes. miscommunication & misunderstandings. mentions of drinking and allusions to driving under the influence (do not do that ever!!). reader might seem a bit unlikeable in this chapter, but it's all part of the plot, okay?? she's trying her best. mentions of intimacy and sex (??), nothing graphic tho. slow burn. alternating povs. jihan as my lovely, beautiful, in love babies (yes they're a couple). some petnames (baby, babe). flashbacks are in italics. lower caps intended [if there’s anything i missed, please let me know!]

word count: approx. 8.1k (idk what happened)

notes: finally managed to work on my baby again. i'm sorry for the long wait but i had a lot of shit going on :/ thank you to everyone who showed love on the first part, i love each and every single on of you!! once again, likes, reblogs and comments are more than appreciated :)

summary: seungcheol wants to fix things; you want to avoid him at all costs. one thing is for sure, though. neither of you will have closure until you talk.

four months ago

the silence ringing inside seungcheol’s ears was even louder than the ambient noise of the restaurant he found himself in.

he genuinely couldn’t believe you were doing this to him again. the time was nearing 8 p.m., almost an hour later than when you were supposed to be here, and seungcheol was trying very hard to ignore the pitiful glances the waiters were not-so-subtly throwing him. he didn’t know what frustrated him more; the fact this was the seventh date you were clearly canceling on, or that you hadn’t updated him on your whereabouts in almost half an hour. if you weren’t going to show up, the least you could do is call and let seungcheol know you were gonna meet him at home.

home. funny how the word no longer brought a sense of peace in seungcheol’s heart.

just as he was about to get up and leave, seungcheol felt his phone buzz in the pocket of his pants, and his heart soared when he saw your name displayed on the screen. maybe you were going to make it after all, maybe you could still enjoy the nice evening he had planned, maybe…

“cheol… i’m so sorry.”

you were not coming.

seungcheol could tell from the apologetic tone in your voice. he didn’t even hear the next words that came from your end, whatever excuse you had to offer getting lost in the sound of his heart breaking. the grip he had on his phone was the only thing anchoring him in that moment, his eyes closed as he was trying to push down the tears that were threatening to spill out. he could hear you calling his name, are you there? but all he could offer was an “i’ll see you at home” before ending the call.

there was no part of you that was ready to face what awaited you on the other side of your apartment door.

the day hadn’t gone as you’d planned. you knew seungcheol had plans for the two of you that evening, so you had decided to wake up and go to the office earlier than usual in order to finish what you were working on in time for your date. but when you woke up that morning, you found seungcheol in the kitchen, diligently trying his best at making breakfast for the two of you. you melted at the sight of your boyfriend wearing your peach-colored apron – and nothing underneath but a pair of sweatpants – and you didn’t have the heart to turn him down when he oh-so-gleefully presented you with what could only be described as an admirable attempt at pancakes. moments like these were rare in your lives, with both of your hectic schedules and whatnot, so you sat down and enjoyed the warmth that came from the food, the sun coming in through the curtains, and seungcheol’s smile.

the sense of peace that came with spending the morning with seungcheol quickly dispersed once you arrived at the office and realized you were late, which gave your boss – mr. moon, a pathetic, greedy, and cruel excuse of a man who lived to make the lives of his employees a living hell – the perfect excuse to make you his target of the day. in addition to the case you were supposed to work on, mr. moon decided to dump on you stacks of paperwork that apparently needed to be taken care of by tonight, a task that normally a damn paralegal could take care of – no offense to paralegals.

normally you wouldn’t put up with this type of behavior. you weren’t raised to let people just walk all over you as they damn pleased. but around the office, there was one unspoken rule that everyone learned as soon as they started working here; ‘whatever mr. moon says, goes.’ besides, moon was the only person on the board of directors that could veto promotions in the firm, so until you could see the words senior associate inscribed under your name on the door of your office, you’d have to shut your mouth and take whatever was thrown at you with your head held high.

that isn’t to say that sometimes you wished mr. moon would get hit by a bus, ‘mean girls’ style. today had been one of those days, as the hours trickled by, closer and closer to when you should leave for your date with seungcheol, and yet mr. moon seemed to have a continuous stream of tasks that needed to be done, by you specifically. you realized you would never make it in time to see seungcheol, and so, tonight marked the seventh date you had to cancel because of work.

now, with the time on your phone reading 22:32, you were standing outside your apartment, bracing yourself for the talk you knew you were going to have with seungcheol. letting out a big exhale, you punched in the door code and let yourself in, the quietness of the apartment immediately enveloping you.

for a split second, you thought seungcheol might have gone to sleep already, but the faint sound of glass redirected you towards the kitchen, where you found said man standing by the kitchen island, nursing a glass of wine. you recognized the bottle mingyu had gifted him on his birthday that year, some fancy brand you’d never heard of before. as you stepped closer, the dim light of the kitchen finally illuminating you, seungcheol turned towards you, an inscrutable look on his face.

after four years of learning, knowing, loving seungcheol, you prided yourself in being able to discern what he was feeling at any given moment. but now, standing in front of him, you were scared to admit that you couldn’t read whatever feelings his eyes held. it made you feel uneasy, the way it seemed like he was looking through you, into you, and you wished you could come up with something to say to disturb the uncomfortable silence, but saying i’m sorry seemed redundant in that moment.

“a bit late, isn’t it?” seungcheol spoke up, and your heart clenched at the cold, almost mocking tone of his voice.

“i know, but i couldn’t get out faster. no matter what i said, my boss kept piling up my work and i just… i couldn’t. i’m so sorry… you know i wanted to come, more than anything. i really did,” you said, silently pleading that seungcheol would forgive you.

“i’m sure you did,” seungcheol gruffed, turning his attention back to the wine before him.

“cheol… don’t be like this, please…” you tried getting closer to him, but his body whipped towards you, his eyes narrowing at you.

“like what, exactly? angry? frustrated? sad? disappointed? i can be like that, actually, seeing as this is the seventh time in 3 months you’ve ditched me for work, apparently!” seungcheol spewed, making you take several steps back. your body tenses.

“‘apparently?’ what is that supposed to mean?”

“i don’t know, it just seems very unlikely that you’d have to sometimes spend more than twelve hours at work. i mean, you’re a lawyer, aren’t you? surely, you should know everything about workplace laws,” seungcheol bit back. he’s never spoken to you like this before, ever, the mockery in his voice surely aimed to hurt you. you felt anger bubbling in the pit of your stomach, but you tried your best to stay calm, for the sake of both of you.

“seungcheol,” you said, and you couldn’t help feeling a twinge of satisfaction seeing his eyebrows raise in surprise after hearing you use his full name. “if you have something to say, i’d rather you just do it, instead of insinuating it.”

seungcheol fell quiet for a moment, glancing down at his feet. “i meant it when i said i was held back at work, cheol. why would i lie about that?” you continued.

“for the past two years that you’ve been working there, you know i never once met any of your coworkers? i’ve never even stepped foot into your office, for god’s sake! you’ve been to my studio countless of times, you know the people i’m closest to, i’ve invited you to all the events the label organizes, so i just can’t understand! i don’t understand why you’re dead-set on keeping me away from that part of your life! and it makes me think… it makes me feel like i’m not enough, like you’re ashamed of me–”

“that’s absolutely not true, cheol!” you jumped in. you couldn’t even entertain the thought of seungcheol feeling self-conscious because of you, when it was the furthest thing you wanted. “i think you’re the most talented person i know, the most passionate, hard-working, smart… beautiful… i could never be ashamed of you.”

unshed tears were clinging to both of your lashes, heavy breathing echoing around the kitchen. how could you let things get so bad?

“it made me think there was someone else,” seungcheol breathes out.

the air gets stuck in your throat, the tears brimming in your eyes finally sliding down your face. “cheol… how could… there never was anyone! i swear, all the nights i would come home late, it was because of my work! i swear, i would never… you’re the only person that’s ever on my mind…”

silence fell over you and seungcheol, the words thrown between you slowly sinking in. seungcheol sniffled, taking a seat at the round table in the middle of the kitchen; you wished you could go to him, gather him in your arms, even though he’s too big to fit in completely, but you knew that this was probably the last thing seungcheol wanted from you in that moment.

“why don’t you quit?”

seungcheol looked up to you, the sadness in his gaze so intense it made you look away, knowing you’re to blame for it. “you complain so much about it… the hours, the work, the boss, the people. why can’t you just leave?”

you breathed in, thinking over seungcheol’s words. “because… because i love doing what i do. i feel about law the way you feel about music. it’s just the environment that’s shitty. but it’s something… that’s mine. and the kind of opportunities i got at this firm… people just starting out, like me, don’t come by them very often usually.”

there was a pause as seungcheol mulled over your words. a part of you thought, hoped, that the way the conversation was going would lead to fixing things, but then seungcheol spoke up again, and you knew. there was no fixing, not anymore.

“i was yours, too. and i would’ve never chosen music over you.”

“you say that now, but if you were put in a situation where you had to choose, i don’t think you’d have as easy of a time as you say.”

“i guess we’ll have to agree to disagree.”

and that was the end of it.

three days after your unexpected reunion with seungcheol, you find yourself back at PLEDIS, ready to tackle jihoon’s case.

the morning had gone on normally enough, with people coming in to give their testimonies regarding jihoon, his work and their relationships with him. as expected, no one had come forward with any potentially harmful or negative remarks about him, everyone applauding him for his tireless dedication to the label and the artists he worked with, as well as marveling at his seemingly innate musical talent and creativity. this was no surprise to you; having known jihoon for almost as long as you’d known seungcheol, you witnessed first-hand jihoon’s mastery of his craft, on multiple occasions. and now, with all the information you had gathered in the past three hours since arriving at PLEDIS, you were starting to feel more confident about winning this lawsuit.

initially, you had no intention of taking on jihoon’s case. the previous weekend, when mr. moon had called you in, you arrived at the firm with your mind set on demanding a break. in the past months, you might as well have changed your home address to the office, seeing as you had been working non-stop on one case after another, pulling countless sleepless nights and taking on extra paperwork as favors to some of your coworkers. and after finding out what the case was actually about, you were even more adamant about turning it down. but all the excuses you offered mr. moon were effectively shut down, leaving you almost begging the man to pass the case to someone else.

before you could use your past relationship with the other in-house music producer working at PLEDIS as an excuse, mr. moon delivered the lowest of low blows. “you know, a high profile case like this could attract lots of new clients for the firm… and put you right on the track for senior associate.”

there was no use arguing anymore after that. moon knew how much you wanted that promotion, and you were honestly not surprised to see him using it against you in order to force you into doing whatever work he wanted you to. so you shut your mouth, took the case, and then went home and cried.

yes, you cried. moving on.

seeing seungcheol again, and unexpectedly so, definitely set you a few steps back in whatever emotional healing you had done in the past few months. and it definitely made you doubt your own abilities as a lawyer. if you couldn’t put aside your personal feelings and instead focus on helping a guy who was being wrongfully accused, were you even meant to practice the law? but you had worked far too hard and sacrificed far too much to let these thoughts cloud your judgment and confidence, so you told yourself that even if you had to be in seungcheol’s proximity for the foreseeable future, your main priority was winning this case. for jihoon, and for yourself.

of course, planning to ignore the obvious feelings you still harbored for your ex-boyfriend was way easier than actually ignoring them. now, as you were gathering your things to meet wonwoo in the conference room he was stationed in, you were also mentally preparing yourself for the off-chance that you would bump into seungcheol again. considering how your luck’s been going in the past few weeks, you think the chances are pretty high.

walking through the halls of PLEDIS felt oddly familiar, and yet strange at the same time. when you and seungcheol first started dating, the label was just starting out, carrying all its business in a measly two-story building on the outskirts of town. you felt a tiny knot forming at the back of your throat, thinking how crazy it was to have witnessed the immense growth that seungcheol went through as an artist and a person, and now, to be walking amongst the fruits of the labor of his work, and so many other people’s, who built the label from the ground up.

as you grow nearer to the conference room where wonwoo was most likely waiting for you, you suddenly catch a whiff of a scent all too familiar to you. musky notes of jasmine and bergamot fill your senses, and for a brief moment, you feel an almost supernatural pull urging you to follow the indistinguishable fragrance.

you know exactly where it leads. but now is not the time.

before you can push the door open and walk into the room, your phone’s screen lights up with a text message. ‘hey honey. can you call when you have the time? she’s not having a very good day…’

you sigh, before dialing your mom’s number.

four years ago

seungcheol always smelled divine.

over the years, you’d heard so many of your friends go on and on about their boyfriends’ perfumes, and how once they found the right scent, they could charm the pants off of them with just the smell of their cologne. to you, that idea seemed entirely far-fetched, because, after all, people aren’t dogs. who in their right mind would base their selection of a partner on something as feeble as smell? even more so, an artificial smell, that didn’t even last forever.

clearly, since a few weeks ago, you haven’t been in your right mind, because you swore there was nothing better in this world than the way seungcheol smelled.

all your friends kept telling you that they’d never seen you act like this before. the honeymoon phase of your relationship had hit you pretty hard, and you were completely smitten with cheol. his smile, his eyes, his dimples, his laugh, his hair, his charm… and his scent, you couldn’t get enough of him. and now, as you were making your way towards PLEDIS together, you couldn’t help but wish you could nuzzle your face in the crook of his neck and stay there forever.

it was your first time seeing where seungcheol worked. you had been wanting to see his studio ever since he had first told you about his job (and proved that he wasn’t one of those wannabe soundcloud rappers or whatever), but considering the label wasn’t exactly in a central location, getting there proved slightly difficult. not to mention that most days, your classes ran pretty late, and seungcheol shared his studio with jihoon, the other music producer at PLEDIS, which meant you couldn’t pop in whenever you had a window of free time, so as to not disturb them.

that night, however, seungcheol decided you deserved a break from your studies, and since your midterms were coming up, it might have been one of the last times you could afford to go out before getting swept up in the craziness of exam season. so after your last class of the day, seungcheol picked you up from campus and drove you outside of town, where PLEDIS stood.

“are you absolutely sure it’s alright for me to be here? i don’t want you to get in trouble with your… superiors, if that’s what you call them,” you said, walking up the stairs closely behind cheol.

“i already told you, it’s fine! besides, you’re not planning to steal any confidential information and spread it online, are you?” he teased, stopping in front of a door that you assumed was his studio.

“hmm, i don’t know… what makes you think i’m not secretly working for one of your competitors?”

seungcheol chuckled, shaking his head, before looking back at you. “oh, baby, you and i both know you like me too much to hurt me so,” he said, finally unlocking the door and letting you step inside.

well, he wasn’t wrong.

to most people, seungcheol and jihoon’s studio might not have looked like much. it held all the standard recording and mixing equipment one would expect to find there, along with personal touches from the boys, like pictures with their friends, some posters, a couple of cd racks, as well as a couch and two huge leather desk chairs. one the other side, inside the recording booth, you could see a keyboard, a couple of guitars, and a drum set, as well as some microphones, of course. to someone who’s never stepped foot in a recording studio before, like you, the place was amazing. and not just because cheol worked in there.

“i know it’s not a lot…” seungcheol mumbles, moving besides you, his arm stretched out in a way that said you could walk around.

your hands grazed the equipment on his desk, holding yourself back in fear of breaking something. “i like it, cheol. it’s homely, and cozy. definitely a good space to get those creative juices flowing,” you gave him a genuine smile, which you could tell instantly put him at ease from the way his shoulders visibly relaxed. he grinned at you, pulling up next to you by the sound board.

“you wanna see how the magic happens?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. you couldn’t help but groan, rolling your eyes.

“cheol, that was so cheesy… but yes, i do. please,” you said, giddy smiles taking over both of your faces.

“okay! come here,” he said, pulling you into his lap as he sat down in his desk chair. you felt your cheeks heat up at his actions, so natural and nonchalant, totally unaware of the effect he had on you. how could he be so oblivious, and quite literally torture you so? being so close to him now, his cologne starting to overpower your senses, you were sure to go dizzy.

“i’m gonna use one of the demos i have here, but for the record, i did not play anything for you while you were here, got it?” seungcheol said, opening an audio file on his laptop.

“yes, sir!” you gave him a wink, his ears turning red. cute.

for the next couple of minutes, seungcheol gives you a rundown on the soundboard, showing you what goes into recording and mixing a song, and even letting you play around with the different settings for pitch and autotune. even though it was all very interesting, nothing compared to just watching seungcheol’s excitement and passion while talking about music. every time your conversations would somehow turn towards music, his face would light up like a kid’s on christmas morning, his whole body animatedly gesturing while he rattled on about his favorite artists and composers, whatever new album came out that week, and even why a song with a good bass line is guaranteed to become a hit (yes, that was an actual discussion the two of you had once). seeing the obvious love he harbored for this art form made you ten times more enamored with him. you could already tell his passion and hard work were going to take him places, and you couldn’t wait to see it all.

“cheol? how did you know you wanted to do music?” you asked, turning to look up at your boyfriend.

“oh, wow, we’re going for the deep stuff, huh?” he laughed.

“you don’t have to share if you don’t want to, i was just curious… you always talk so passionately about it, i could just tell it means a lot to you.”

seungcheol sighed, leaning back into the chair. “it’s alright. i really don’t know how i got here, to be honest. i’ve always been interested in music, and found myself writing and experimenting with sound. one day, i just knew that i couldn’t really picture myself doing anything else. so i focused on that and worked my ass off, i guess.”

“well, clearly?! we’re sitting in your own studio! i’d say you’re doing pretty great,” you exclaimed, smiling at seungcheol’s blushing cheeks. “you should be proud of yourself, cheol, really.”

seungcheol can’t even look at you right now, too overcome with giddiness at the onslaught of compliments you’re suddenly throwing his way. instead, he shoves his face in the crook of your neck, mumbling a quiet ‘thanks.’

“is it hard to come up with new music?” you continue, playing with the strings of the hoodie he was wearing.

“hmm, it depends,” his voice is muffled, and you flinch at the ticklish feeling of his breath fanning on your neck. “there are days when i can put down a whole song and melody at once; sometimes it takes me weeks to be satisfied with a song i’m working on. but lately i’ve been feeling more… inspired than usual, so it’s been going pretty well.”

you turn your face towards him, a teasing smile stretching across your lips. “oh, really? how come?”

seungcheol returns your smile, his fingers pressing slightly harder into your skin where they sat on your waist. “just someone i met recently… they’re really nice and beautiful and funny and smart,” now it was your turn to grow shy, feeling your cheeks and chest grow warm at the implication of his words. “but i think jihoon is growing tired of all the ballads i’ve been writing.”

you both fall into a fit of giggles, your faces so impossibly close, your noses brush. “poor jihoon… whatever will he do?” you whisper, and before you can breathe in again, seungcheol’s lips fall against yours.

the air in your lungs dissipates in seconds. your entire body is ablaze, and you swear your hearing no longer registers the music playing from seungcheol’s laptop, instead becoming attuned to the sound of cheol’s soft sighs. you want this moment to last forever, to melt into his embrace, ingrain yourself into his very existence. his lips grow more and more fervent against yours, and you swear your mind goes blank, the only thought even going through your head in that moment a chant of his name. cheol, cheol, cheol, cheol…

later that night, once you’re home, getting ready for bed, you catch a whiff of seungcheol’s cologne again, the scents of his perfume imbued into your sweatshirt. you can’t help but smile like an idiot.

you didn’t wash that sweatshirt for a week after.

no matter how much seungcheol loved his friends, he couldn’t go on another second hearing jeonghan and joshua discuss whether they should choose lilies or hydrangeas for their wedding (because the good ol’ rose is too much of a cliche, apparently, according to joshua).

an exasperated sigh escaped him, his whole body slouching from the weight of the gloom he was carrying. jeonghan and joshua, who had been animatedly bantering over wedding preparations, suddenly go quiet, their heads snapping up to look at their friend. if this was a cartoon, they swore you would see a huge, gray cloud hanging above his head.

“alright, you gotta tell us what’s got you all pouty and gloomy, because this? this is just sad, cheol,” said joshua, gesturing at seungcheol’s crouched figure.

he sighed again, but straightened his back this time. the truth was, nothing particularly bad had happened today. but the day hadn’t gone as seungcheol had initially planned.

that morning, seungcheol had arrived at work determined to talk to you. seeing you again earlier that week had broken down the walls seungcheol had put up in the months following your breakup, and all the emotions he had tried pushing behind those walls – anger, sadness, frustration, yearning, love – were slowly, but surely, seeping back in. there was no point denying it anymore; seungcheol was not ready to let go just yet.

taking jihoon’s advice to heart, he decided to ‘grow some balls’ and initiate a discussion with you, one that you probably should’ve had before any of the shit that went down between the two of you could’ve gone down. seungcheol knew, deep down, that you were hiding something, and thought that once both of your cards were out on the table, you could either work on fixing what’s been broken, or you could both gain some closure and move on with your lives.

seungcheol was desperately hoping for the first option.

either way, whatever plans seungcheol had made were quickly put on hold when he arrived at his meeting and only found your colleague, jeon wonwoo, waiting for him in the conference room. he’d made himself look like an idiot, bluntly asking about your whereabouts, disappointment clear on his face at your lack of presence, which only got him an inscrutable look from wonwoo (who made a mental note to check in with you about this little outburst, for safety reasons). wonwoo hadn’t mentioned anything about you throughout the interview, which in retrospect, seungcheol realized, was more than normal, considering wonwoo probably had no idea that the two of you even dated before. if anyone at your firm would’ve known about your previous relationship, he imagines you wouldn’t even be here, working on this case. conflict of interest and all.

in the end, seungcheol had no idea whether you were even at PLEDIS at all, and didn’t even have time to ask around for you, having a number of recording sessions planned for the rest of the morning. it wasn’t until jeonghan called and invited him out for lunch with him and joshua, that seungcheol left his studio again. when his friends greeted him outside the restaurant they decided on, they held back from commenting on his sulky expression.

seungcheol didn’t tell them that he had half a mind to turn down their invitation when he heard where the couple wanted to meet. IL GRATO was your favorite place in town (you used to say because it was where seungcheol had taken you on your first date), and the restaurant held plenty of the many happy memories you and seungcheol had made over the years. obviously, seungcheol wasn’t particularly keen on revisiting them today, but he didn’t want to seem more pathetic than he already felt, so he shut up and pretended everything was fine.

that didn’t last long, evidently.

“why don’t you just call her? she’s obligated to answer, now that she’s working on jihoon’s situation, right? ask to schedule a meeting with her or something,” jeonghan said, sipping on his glass of prosecco.

“and what reason could i give her for a meeting? that jeon dude already asked me anything he could about jihoon, so i can’t use anything about the case,” seungcheol mumbled. “and saying i wanna discuss the clear unresolved feelings left between us is guaranteed to get her to hang up on me.”

joshua, who had been intently listening to seungcheol’s whines, suddenly perks up, grabbing seungcheol’s shoulder. “cheol, didn’t you mention jeon said he still had some interviews lined up after lunch time?”

seungcheol frowned. “yeah? what difference does it make?”

“well, dumbass, if Y/N was in fact at PLEDIS all this time, that means that she’s probably in one of the conference rooms on the same floor as him. and since most staff clock out at 5 p.m., i’d say you still have about half an hour to go back, find her, and talk to her. like you said you wanted,” joshua explained pointedly, giving seungcheol a look that screamed you have to do it or else i will hurt you.

joshua was right. how could he have been so stupid, to completely overlook what wonwoo had mentioned off-handedly at the end of their meeting. he hadn’t even considered the possibility that you and wonwoo had split up to cover more ground in collecting testimonies, and now he was at risk of completely missing his chance to see you, unless he hauled ass to PLEDIS immediately.

seungcheol shot up from his seat, quickly gathering his things and throwing his credit card on the table, before dashing for the front door. “you guys are the best! lunch is on me!” he shouted, before taking off running.

jeonghan and joshua look at each other, before bursting into giggles. jeonghan sighs, “i need them to resolve this issue before the wedding, really. i won’t be able to handle it if seungcheol mopes around during the whole ceremony.”

joshua cooed, rolling his eyes. “you simply can’t rush love, babe,” he said, pressing a quick kiss to his lover’s cheek.

jeonghan rolled his eyes, turning his attention to the spreadsheet full of wedding prep details laid out on the table. a mischievous glint gleamed in his eyes, as he turned to look at joshua. “so, my dear joshuji, how about lilies for the flower displays?”

“JEONGHAN, I SAID NO!”

nine months ago

when you and seungcheol arrived at IL GRATO, jeonghan and joshua were already inside, patiently waiting at the table they had booked for your party of four, wearing two oddly calm smiles on their faces.

to say you and seungcheol weren’t suspicious at all would be a lie.

jeonghan had called earlier that week to invite the two of you on a double date that weekend – which wasn’t unusual, since the four of you had been going on dates like these since forever  – but what had put you and seungcheol on edge was the ‘news’ jeonghan mentioned he and joshua had to share.

you and seungcheol had been going through a rough patch in the past two weeks, and this fact wasn’t unknown to your group of friends. the two of you were not the type to air out your dirty laundry, so for your friends to notice the growing tension between you meant that things were truly going badly. even though neither you or seungcheol had verbalized this to each other, you were both worried that tonight’s double date was just a cover up for an intervention, aimed to make you and seungcheol work through whatever it was bothering you two. jeonghan and joshua were seungcheol’s oldest and closest friends, and they never shied away from confronting seungcheol (and you, after you were welcomed into their friend group), especially when it came to his well-being, both physical and mental. you had been preparing your defense all week, just in case they decided to bring the situation up (and you also realized how desperately you needed a break from work).

after settling in and exchanging common pleasantries about your lives and work, the four of you put in your orders (jeonghan ordering the most expensive bottle of champagne on the menu, much to yours and seungcheol’s surprise), and after the waiter brought the drinks along, you decided to bite the bullet and ask the question that had been bothering you all week.

“so, you two said you had some news to share, right?”

jeonghan and joshua exchange a secretive look, and you only just notice the blush that seems to grace their faces. they looked like teenagers in love. you couldn’t help but feel a slight twinge of envy.

“i guess there’s no reason to beat around the bush…” joshua said, looking again towards jeonghan.

“we’re getting married!” the other continues, leaning back into his seat to throw an arm around joshua, grinning from ear to ear.

silence falls over the table, as you and seungcheol drink in jeonghan’s revelation. you jump out of your seat, genuine excitement and joy overtaking you, as you walk around the table to hug and congratulate the two men. a string of high-pitched ‘oh my gods’ leave your lips, gaining the attention of a few other restaurant patrons, but you honestly couldn’t care less, too happy for your dear friends to pay attention to them.

as you make your way back to your seat, holding tightly onto joshua’s hand, you notice that seungcheol was eerily quiet, silently watching his friends, his eyes wide and unblinking. you lay a hand onto his arm, squeezing. “cheol… aren’t you going to say something?” you whisper.

that seems to snap him out of his daze, a gasp escaping him, before his hands come up to cover his face. you, joshua, and jeonghan exchange a concerned look, completely blindsided by seungcheol’s unexpected reaction, since he was as one of jeonghan and joshua’s loudest supporters (he had been betting on the two of them getting together since they were teenagers). but before either of you can say something else, seungcheol looks up, unshed tears swimming along his lash line.

“i’m sorry, i just…” he pauses, as if trying to find the right words. “i just can’t… believe… that neither of you told me! you traitors! you were planning to get engaged and i just find out at the same time as everyone else?” seungcheol pouts, his dramatics leaving the rest of you in tears.

“hey! what is that supposed to mean?” you tease, trying to calm your laughter down.

“no offense, baby, but me and the boys? we have history,” seungcheol winks, before turning back to his friends. “which means i should have priority to all life-changing news in your lives!”

the table falls into laughter once again, before jeonghan and joshua proceed to give you and seungcheol all the details he was claiming they had been keeping away from him. the rest of the evening goes like this, drinks and food shared around, and you almost forget about whatever problems your own relationship has been having, too busy reveling in the love radiating from the couple in front of you.

that night, on the drive home, you and seungcheol fall into comfortable silence, a first in the past weeks. you don’t know if it’s the buzz from the alcohol you drank, or the crooning voice of whatever singer was playing on the radio, but you can’t help but look over to seungcheol’s side, your eyes glancing over the side of his face. he was so handsome, cheeks blushed and hair messy from tonight’s laughter. you wanted to lean over and run the tips of your fingers over the edges of his face, pour everything you couldn’t say into just one touch. please forgive me, just trust me…

“what’s the staring for?” seungcheol speaks, and you whip your head around, looking out the window on your side.

“ah, i wasn’t staring!” you mumble, feeling your face grow hot. “was just thinking… about tonight.”

he smiles, briefly glancing your way. “me too,” he says, voice barely above a whisper.

a beat passes before seungcheol speaks up again. “when we get married, what would you want our wedding to be like?”

your heart swells when you realize he said ‘when’ instead of ‘if,’ but you can’t help but tease him a little bit. “‘when?’ i haven’t even said ‘yes’ yet, cheollie,” you smirk, turning your face towards him again.

evidently, seungcheol catches onto your little joke, but he plays into it. “emphasis on ‘yet’, baby. now answer the question!”

“okay, okay,” you chuckle. “well, i think i’d like something small… just our closest family and friends… maybe somewhere outside the city, like in the countryside, something like that,” you say decidedly, already daydreaming about all the possibilities.

“what about the beach? i think a beach wedding would be so cool… do you think your mom would let us have it at her beach house?” seungcheol says, an excited glimmer evident in his eyes.

he completely misses how your face falls at the mention of your mother, but you quickly mask it by nonchalantly agreeing with him. “i don’t see why not, she would probably love that…”

the rest of the drive goes by fast, the two of you bantering over silly wedding things like flowers, color palettes, and music selection (obviously), before you finally arrive home. inside, you both move lazily, drunk on love – or the leftover champagne in your systems – slowly undressing, stealing kisses, exchanging giggles and tantalizing looks… for the first time in weeks, you feel a sense of peace cover you, a quiet voice in the back of your mind assuring you that everything was going to be alright, and you embrace the feeling, falling into seungcheol as he whispers sweet nothings into your ears.

just as you’re about to fall into bed, your phone starts ringing from the floor of the bedroom, and at first you ignore it, too caught up in the feeling of seungcheol’s mouth against you, but the noise is insistent, and cheol detaches from you with a groan, urging you to see who’s bothering you in the middle of the night.

seungcheol can’t see the name on your screen, but when you tell him it’s your mom, he motions for you to take the call – she wouldn’t call this late unless there was an emergency, after all – but much to his surprise, you shuffle to find a shirt to put on, before you leave the room to take the call. from the bedroom, he can only hear muffled snippets of your conversation, and the tone of your voice is too ambiguous for him to guess how the talk is going.

when you come back, he doesn’t bring up the fact that you’d never gone to another room to take a call before. ever.

as soon as the clock on the wall reads 5 p.m., you bring the final interview you had scheduled for the day to an end, and as you say your goodbyes to the woman from the marketing department, wonwoo walks into the conference room, struggling to balance a stack of papers in his hands. you rush towards him, picking up part of the papers.

“woah, are these all the testimonies from your part of the staff?” you question, marveling at the size of the stack wonwoo brought in.

“yeah, crazy, isn’t it? i still can’t believe so many people came forward for this guy,” wonwoo replies, setting down his shoulder bag on the table. his shoulders seem tense, a whole day sitting at a desk clearly taking a toll on him.

“well, he’s clearly appreciated. everyone who i talked with only had good things to say about him,” you say nonchalantly, flicking through the papers, trying to pretend like you weren’t already aware of jihoon’s stellar reputation. each piece of paper seemed to be a reformulation of what the previous person mentioned, everybody mentioning similar qualities and compliments regarding him.

after you and wonwoo go over the information you both collected today, making a game plan for the next steps that needed to be taken, you both gather your things to finally go home for the day, exhaustion setting in. although the day hadn’t been particularly stressful, the possibility of bumping into seungcheol had caused you much more anxiety than usual, and you honestly couldn’t wait to get out of here and finally be able to breathe normally.

as you wait for the elevator – which seems to be taking its sweet time, moving in slow motion to the seventh floor – you hear wonwoo mumble under his breath, before he lets out an “oh, fucking hell.” ever the proper gentleman, he catches himself, and swiftly apologizes for his choice of words.

you chuckle, waving your hand to dismiss his unnecessary apology. “what’s wrong?”

“i’m missing some documents… i think i left them in the room i was in this morning, i’ll go after them. you go ahead and get going, i don’t want to hold you back any longer,” he explains, already turning around to head for the conference room.

“are you sure? i don’t mind wa–”

“i’m sure! go, you deserve to rest,” he shouts, disappearing around the corner of the hallway.

you sigh, shaking your head, but appreciating the gesture nevertheless. the elevator bell dings, and the doors open to reveal an empty cabin. you breathe out a sigh of relief, thankful for the silence. you press the button for the ground floor, and close your eyes, leaning against the back wall of the elevator, hoping to ease the sting that came from staring into a computer screen for a whole day.

your peace and quiet is short-lived however, as the elevator only manages to go down to the sixth floor before stopping again. you sigh, preparing yourself for the onslaught of tired employees who were most likely rushing to get home as well. however, when you open your eyes, there’s only one other pair staring into yours, and you feel all the air inside your lungs dissipating, leaving you breathless.

seungcheol is standing in front of you, wearing an equally speechless look on his face. the two of you stare at each other, almost as if you’re scared to move, in fear of disrupting the karmic force that brought this moment upon you even more. you wish the ground would open up and swallow you whole, feeling completely unprepared for this situation. you’d thought you were finally out of the woods, that you’d be able to go home in peace and not think about the case, about cheol, about anything anymore, at least for tonight.

clearly, the universe had other plans for you.

seungcheol seems to snap out of his daze when the doors of the elevator start to close again, his arm shooting out to stop them and finally stepping inside. as the doors close behind him and the elevator resumes its course downwards, you suddenly feel like the cabin is ten times smaller than it was a few moments ago, your body instinctively moving to one of the corners of the elevator. seungcheol naturally takes over the corner opposite from you, and you can feel his eyes on you with every step he takes.

you can’t fucking breathe, and you can’t believe he still has such a hold over your body.

“hi.”

“hi.”

you both say it at the same time, and under different circumstances, the two of you might’ve erupted in giggles at the coincidence. in this moment, however, the tension between you is so palpable, it’s almost constricting.

“how’s jihoon’s case going?” seungcheol asks, and you feel almost grateful for him taking the initiative to fill the silence.

“it’s good, yeah. we had a productive day, gathered a lot of info,” you say, clearing your throat. why were you being so goddamn awkward?

seungcheol nods, humming, silence filling the space once again. you dared to sneak a glance in his direction, noticing his furrowed brows and pursed mouth. four months could not erase everything you learned about cheol in four years, and you immediately recognized his ‘i’m trying to find the right words’ look. you sigh, knowing exactly what’s inevitably coming, so you decide to put seungcheol out of his misery.

“seungcheol,” you say, voice barely above a whisper. your eyes meet in the quiet of the elevator. “just ask me. just ask me what’s bothering you. at this point, should we even beat around the bush with each other anymore?”

seungcheol opens his mouth, then decides against it. he shakes his head, sighing, before looking back at you. “i’m not ready to let go yet,” he murmurs.

your voice trembles as you try to keep your tears at bay. “cheol… why are you doing this? i mean, why are you doing this to yourself?! things haven’t been working out between us for months, and i– i was terrible to you! you should let me go, why can’t you just… leave me alone?”

seungcheol’s eyes widen, an almost crazed glint appearing behind them. “leave– leave you alone? are you fucking kidding me?” his voice rises in volume, as he takes a few steps closer. “i can’t leave you alone, because i gave you four years of my fucking life, yeah? and in those years i learned all there is to know about you. unless everything you’ve ever told me was just an act, i’ve learned how to tell when you’re lying, and i’ve learned how to tell when you’re struggling, and you know what? you’re doing both right now!”

your hands start shaking, frustration bubbling inside your chest. “i don’t need you looking out for me, alright? i can take care of myself! and i’m fine, for your information!”

“bullshit! you’re not fine, and you know why? because for three years, everything was perfectly fine with us, and then all of a sudden last year, something happened, yeah? i don’t know what exactly, because you won’t fucking tell me, but something happened that made you squeamish around me, distant, paranoid, and– and careless! you stopped caring about me, about us!”

“i didn’t stop caring!”  you croaked, your throat raw from holding back your tears. seungcheol’s eyes softened slightly at the sight of your tears finally let loose on your cheeks. “i just… i…”

seungcheol closes the last of the distance between you, standing right in front of you now. “Y/N… baby… if you’re in some sort of trouble, please… just tell me. there’s nothing you could say that could scare me or drive me away. i know you can take care of yourself, but you don’t have to! please, just… no more lies, please…”

your eyes meet his, the sincerity and love swimming in them bringing even more tears to your eyes. you could just tell him right now, let everything that’s been weighing down on you for the past year spill out all at once… but you can’t. you would never forgive yourself to come in between seungcheol and his work, his dreams… your burdens couldn’t be his burdens. you just can’t allow it.

“cheol… i ca–”

“okay, i need you to take five steps away from her, or i will physically remove you, hyung. no matter that you are older and stronger than me,” comes a voice from your right. in your fight-induced stupor, neither you nor seungcheol had realized that the elevator had reached the ground floor, the doors opening to reveal one of your favorite people on earth.

thank god for boo seungkwan.

[my-maehem]

“I’m sorry— who are you again?”

I introduce to you my MC, Hemera! I currently don’t have any L O R E about her just yet but…

I’m sorry but can I brag about my idea of her using her wand as a hair stick!?!? Imagine if I made a custom hair stick wand irl………

Here is the little info I have about her:

She has striking red hair that pairs well with her bright, green eyes. I love using complementary colors.

Unlike the game where we are given a barn owl, if she were to pick her own messenger it would be a tuxedo cat. Feat. My cat Max, he’s an adorable menace.

Very cocky with an inflated ego, she will bite.

Uses sarcasm 24/7, more than likely her coping mechanism.

I actually made her American because I thought it would be a fun idea to have someone with an American accent at Hogwarts. and because I’m American hehehehe.

She likes to keep her hair up almost all the time so I don’t actually know how long her hair is yet…

If you haven’t figured it out yet she is in house Slytherin, although she does share some characteristics of a Ravenclaw.

Definitely gives anti-hero vibes…

OMG I FORGOT TO ADD HER BODY FRECKLES… she has body freckles btw, similar to the freckles Ominis has on his pretty face.

That’s all I have for her currently, I’ll definitely have more details about her later, I kind of want to do more character studies of her and ofc other characters… I also just want to find a simple style I can use, apologize for the inconsistency of my art style, I normally draw realistically and I’m trying to find a simpler style to use for like comic strips or interactions.

Now I gotta draw these boyz:

See yeah! 🍪

[cardudescrown]

Reasons why Taryn is such a well written Anti-Hero:

SHE'S A TEENAGER. Taryn is at that "Prologue age" of 16-24 that literally means she doesn't know how to be specific in what she wants. She has hormones, She's not well versed in socializing, and has tons of insecurities that any teenager has. Nobody is really happy at the age of 16-24, and she probably hesitated on most of her decisions.

She is idealistic. That's why she felt guilty after she chose locke, because haha, the handsome guy isn't actually gonna solve all of your problems. At that age, who isn't delusional about their first real relationship??? She can't see the red flags because it never slapped her in the face. And jude was also Idealistic. Taryn chose the Class Clown, but Jude also chose the Hypocrite Prince. Glad both of them are dead.

Taryn is used to praise. She was the Extroverted sister. She wasn't that criticised or judged because she fit in. So when she makes a horrible mistake, she spiraled. Taryn betrayed her sister, and Jude helped her still. Madoc accepted Taryn because she was obedient to him. Oriana praised her more, so she felt more important than Jude. All of this further validated the fact that she doesn't really know the gravity of her choices, which she isn't emotionally equipped to shoulder. Everybody babied her decisions and forgave her. I mean, who ignores their twin sister after dating the guy she's been hanging out with??? Jude was so ready to forgive as long she apologized first?? Taryn is still immature.

In contrast to all of this, Jude embodies the characteristics of a Hero. She is NOT a hero because she is power hungry, ruthless, and vicious. BUT she chooses the much more beneficial options, disciplines herself to train, and relies on the strengths of others for help. She is Humble, she doesn't break easily, and she most definitely do not want validation from those people who look down on her. She's a really well-written morally grey villain that has the best heroic Characteristics.

[dark-manga-stuff]

Galatea - The Eyes of God

Something I love about claymore is how the abilities that the warriors possess, usually have some type of character or thematic significance. Both of those hold true for Galatea, she is the literal and figurative eyes of the organization which granted her the name “God Eyes”.

With her ability to sense yoma energy from so far away, and literally telegraph conversations, she has one of the most valuable skills for the organization. And in the world of Claymore, the organization is the equivalent of a god.

It’s made clear from the moment we meet Galatea, that she will be an anti-hero character. She walks the line between ally and foe, with her ability also comes with the possibility of manipulating the organization, which she does here, she’s playing the middle game.

Right after we meet her, we get the confirmation that she’s a strong claymore and a top 3 claymore at that. And considering Alicia and Beth’s strength, top 3 is ridiculously good. Galatea is made to be a threat which is why she’s classified as a monster by Miria.

We get our first look at Galatea when Clare goes to fight Riful and save Jean. Galatea is still playing the anti-hero role in where she walks the line between helping clare and helping the organization. This character duality shadows her true intentions for the rest of the story.

Galatea has a strong aura of confidence and a bit of arrogance coming into this. She arrives to capture Clare, but she still decided to manipulate the organization and it’s still unclear what she has planned for Clare.

Galatea being “God Eyes” allows here to basically manipulate the battle, her yoma energy reading abilities allow her to harmonize with her opponent, shifting the battle in whatever direction she desires. The fight all comes down to concentration and prediction.

Another detail about Galatea is just how strong is she? With the yoma power she’s number 1. But what holds her back is that she can’t keep this form for long, the higher her power goes, the lower chance of coming back. The only downside to having this immense amount of power.

Galatea eventually reveals her true intentions as she was doing a personal investigation rather than one for the organization. At this point in her character she works for her own benefit and if the organization gets in the way, she makes a way for herself.

This statement is also made before we’re aware that Alicia and Beth can awaken and go back to their normal states. This is an ability far surpassing and shattering the limitations of yoma energy and holds other characters to a greater standard, a complete change of form.

Galatea allows Clare to walk freely, at first she seems very loyal to the organization. But after spending that time with Clare and Jean, I think she just wanted to test their resolve. She seemed hopeful for another meeting, I love how she keeps up the anti-hero thing. The next time Galatea and Clare meet, a lot went down. Galatea left the organization and went into hiding, as a nun. This works thematically & in characteristic fashion cause her title is “God Eye” and she’s doing the thing that would draw her closest to god which is being a nun.

Galatea only grew stronger through the seven years she was in hiding. She completely destroyed her eyes so now she really lives up to the “God Eye” title. Galatea now relies entirely on her energy sensing abilities. She had to adapt or else she’d be dog food for new claymores. Galatea still remains the same after all that time passed, still calm and collected, she doesn’t overestimate her strength but is aware of her capabilities in combat. Galatea still has a master way of turning a situation into a team fight, even if they started as enemies.

The circumstances in her return are also reminiscent of when she was sent to capture Clare. The dynamic shifts when you are the one wanted by the organization. Galatea is now the hunted instead of the hunter. I love the significance of the second meeting between Galatea and Clare, it shows the massive gap that she put between them in terms of power. Clare surpassed her and she did in fact, stay alive. Clare mastered a flurry of techniques and increased her raw skill.

Roles are reversed and Clare is the one that saves Galatea from an awakened being. Clare is also incredibly poised compared to last time which is a perfect way to show her growth, by bringing back a familiar situation. After meeting Galatea back in the Holy City of Rabona, Galatea isn’t too involved in the combat anymore, her abilities simply don’t match up to the 7 ghosts or new warriors but that’s fine since they are the spotlight of the story. I’m satisfied with the shine she did receive.

This is the end of the thread, Galatea is a fantastic character from being a main player to a supportive member, I loved every part of her involvement in the series. This was a very fun thread to make.

Credits: T Water

[takeariskao3]

With Ginny's experience with the diary, do you think she could've turn dark? not a full villain, but more antihero

i love that you asked me this question because i 100% read canon!ginny and write *my* ginny as morally dubious.

now hear me out

ginny has an extremely black and white view of what is right and wrong but it's not right and wrong determined by institutions or by the society she lives in. ginny decides for herself what is right and wrong, what she can and can't live with, what is unjust and what is justified. and this is absolutely because of her experience with the diary. she does not trust anyone but herself to dictate where she puts her time and energy and emotional labor.

through any lens other than hers (or harry's) this is could very realistically be the defining characteristics of a villain. because ginny doesn't really fight for BIG causes or systematic change, she fights for people. her people. she would absolutely tell you that she stands up for people who can't stand up for themselves, but she also takes out her anger and her contempt in ways that are barely defensible. she hexes people she doesn't like... she hurls insults with precision... she holds grudges... forgiveness isn't in her vocabulary... she barely ever attempts to reign in her temper... she already is an anti-hero. in fact, she's a huge bitch. she's THAT bitch.

and if one of her people (think luna, neville, harry, her family, her children) were threatened or hurt in any way, our girl would not hesitate. she would go full super villian.

i love her.

[darklinaforever]

Me when people think that being a groomer or a rapist goes hand in hand with being morally gray / an anti hero :

Once again, people confuse complexity /being interesting, with gray morality / anti-hero.

If you think a character can be an anti-hero /morally gray, while still being a groomer or a rapist, we have a serious problem.

Because I'm tired of people saying that Daemon can remain the morally gray and anti-hero character that he is while being a so-called groomer (which he is not in HOTD or F&B).

Or that Aegon II, a canonical rapist (whether in HOTD or F&B) is at the same time morally gray.

This kind of opinion sends shivers down my spine.

These characteristics cannot make you a morally gray character or an anti-hero. Certainly not. On the other hand, they can totally be interesting and / or complex villains.

Daemon is a morally gray and complex character, more precisely an anti-hero and he is not a groomer, whether in HOTD or F&B.

Aegon II is a character who is a villain / antagonist, and he is a rapist. On the other hand, he is certainly not morally gray. On top of that he's not even really interesting or complex in an objective way, since he's written as a fairly caricatured and disgusting villain.

Besides, most of the Greens are caricatured villains who are not really complex. On the other hand, some, like the characters of Alicent and Aemond for exemple, can be interesting despite that.

Whether it's Alicent being a villain who embraces her political ambitions and greed for power while leading a faction to carry out a usurpation.

Or for Aemond, with his narrative role as Daemon's foil.

I've drifted, but the point is that we need to stop believing that because a character is morally gray / complex / an anti-hero that he can commit grooming or rape.

It's not fucking okay...

And don't let anyone compare that to murder. Tolerance is very different for these subjects in fiction.

Killing someone narratively can work in the context of a character who is morally gray / an anti-hero, because he can commit them for specific reasons related to his cause or things that fall under emotional understanding.

Not a grooming or a rape.

[gugug4g4]

Honestly, is Soo-won the anti-villain of akayona?

Anti-villain have opposite qualities of a villain

SO has characteristics of the HERO

but is actually the villain

[jamesunderwater]

1. Tell us why you like James Potter! I want a whole essay please and thank you!

"Why I Love Like James Potter" by jamesunderwater 1/27/24 

So, I think an important context for my feelings about James Potter is that (as you know) I am a fandom elder. Which means, I already had an extreme attachment to James Potter and his pals before we ever even got the Snape’s Worst Memory chapter. I just looked it up, and somehow I was only ten when OotP came out, so evidently I was massively in love with Sirius Black and obsessed with the Marauders before I hit double digits. (Jesus, no wonder they’re molded with my identity.) The point being – before he was anything else to me, James Potter was the man who bravely sacrificed himself for his family, whose core feature was defined by Sirius’s declaration that they “would have died rather than betray their friends.” He was the guy who figured out how to become an animagus just to be a supportive friend, and based on the few lines that the Marauders have through the Map in PoA, he was hilarious. And really, the fandom kinda just took that and ran with it. So by the time OotP came out and we got so much more information on him – and his dynamic with Lily (cue me sighing dreamily here) – James Potter was already a venerated figure in my mind. -- OMG I just had a buried memory pop up of the Harry Potter Trading Cards as well, which, I don’t think I had one / there was one for James, but there was one for Lily, where she was holding toadspawn?? Or something? and I was in love with her just based on her cute face and red hair and bright eyes, so obviously I’m gonna also be infatuated with the guy who got to marry her.

Okay I got a bit off the point. 

I guess reflecting on it, the way I fell in love with James as a character was very different than how I did for Sirius, and it’s in part due to Sirius being alive in the books, but also speaks to who James is, too. I fell in love with Sirius for who Sirius is, all by himself. I fell in love with James for who he is with other people. I loved the guy who would do anything for his friends. I loved the guy who had this magnetic dynamic with the fiery redhead. I loved the guy who was brilliant and loved by all, and didn’t think twice about sacrificing himself for his family. And I think that this has, for the most part, remained the core of why I love him. 

But of course, I’ve grown up a lot since then, and so have my feelings and opinions. 

– intermission to say I looked back at the ask and realized it only asks about why I like the character, which…somehow changes some of my answer, but we’re gonna try to roll them together – 

Okay, so why I both like and love James as a character now has a lot more to do with the nuances of him. I love that he isn’t perfect. He’s multi-dimensional, and I think his character is a great opportunity to investigate growing up. I think that progression is harder to see in some of the other characters (I have thoughts on why but they aren’t the point right now), but James is just this splendid example of how someone can be so fundamentally good, and also be a fucking kid. He’s messy and that doesn’t make him any less of a “hero” or a “good guy,” but not in your traditional anti-hero or villain arc kind of way. I dunno, maybe it’s in part because I relate to this feeling of not always being a “good person” growing up. I could be arrogant, and mean, and over-dramatic, and stubborn, but people still saw me as a good, likable person, and eventually I did grow out of a lot of the harsher aspects of those characteristics. I love that James gives permission for that, to inspect the dualities within people. 

And on a basic level, I think he was kind of the picture of everything I wanted to have and be. His physical looks / physique is what I’ve been drawn to in men, and eventually realized it’s what I wanted to look like myself; he has this found family that he’s built that is truly a family, this best friend who accepts him fully and he accepts fully and they’re attached at the hip; he becomes a person deserving of and complementary to a strong, independent, kind woman; and his kid is Harry Potter, who truly is one of my favorite characters of all time. So. 

I dunno, I feel like this isn’t as eloquent as I wanted it to be… I’d be very curious to hear other people’s thoughts added onto this (yours and others’!) because I know there’s so much more that I’m missing that other people would say. 

I got to nearly 850 words, though, so hopefully this essay is sufficient enough to earn me a B, at least.

[Submitting for Extra Credit: Photo of the frogspawn card from the Harry Potter Trading Card Game]

[drnecolii]

Currently hyperfixating on the Harry Potter fandom/Severus Snape pls don't judge

Okok so the people that follow me or have seen my (few) posts regarding the Wizarding World Fandom have noticed that I am very much a proud Snape fan. I admire morally grey characters such as Severus, and although I slightly prefer the movies to the books for now (that might change in the future, who knows) and prefer movie Snape to book Snape, I also appreciate Snape in the books and am fully aware that he, in fact, tends to be more cruel than in the movies. I just overall think he is a very fleshed out character, a good example of the "anti-hero" archetype in literature, and overall just absolutely love the man. However, that doesn't mean I judge people in the fandom that don't like/hate/feel disinterest in his character. It's perfectly understandable and obviously it's okay, I mean we can't all like the same thing and have the same opinion yk???

But here's the thing ; WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE DISLIKE/HATE ON HIM FOR THE WRONG REASONS?

I understand why you'd hate him ; like yeah, he has done very bad things (like join a legitimate WIZARDING CULT/ WIZARDING N30N4ZI GROUP, working as a double agent, has been cruel to the people around him) but like...why do some people hate him cuz of his looks and his past??

I deadass have heard stories of people in the fandom, mainly James stans (absolutely no hate to you guys I love you all so much), that said that he deserved to get bullied and harassed during his student years by James and his friends just cuz he wasn't conventionally pretty and was poor? Are yall okay???

Like would you tell a person that got bad treatment on the regular that they deserve it just because they might be less fortunate than you or might look a certain way you don't like? It's obviously normal to dislike a person due to their actions that mightve harmed you or others in some way and overall dislike aspects of their personality, but to dislike them just because they might have low income or share similar characteristics with Snape (hooked nose, pale, oily hair, etc)? That's just...ew.

Tldr ; I understand and appreciate people that dislike Snape (because of personal reasons, his personality, his actions etc) despite being a Snape fan myself, but not when they dislike him merely because of his appearance and unfortunate background.

[yukiteruakari]

If Leon had lived longer or survived, I believe he would've been one of the main characters in the story.

I usually see promotional materials, such as merchandise, including Sayaka alongside the main trio of THH, despite her death in chapter 1. This is understandable given her early portrayal as the heroine. However, let me explain why it would also make sense for Leon to be included in the main group if the story had focused on him as it did with Sayaka.

Danganronpa often pairs characters with others who complement their themes, forming what I call "narrative partners," whether in duos or trios. This isn't just limited to main characters—most have these connections, though there are exceptions.

Leon's narrative partner is Sayaka. They are designed as complementary opposites, each embodying the game's central theme of "talent" more than any other characters, a theme that wasn't touched upon after their early deaths in the story. Also, Leon's crush on Sayaka, which is evident throughout the Danganronpa series, further ties their stories together. They were also the first characters created, serving as a foundation for the series.

Moreover, Leon shares characteristics with the "best friend" archetype seen in other Danganronpa games, like Kazuichi and Kaito. I would argue that these characters were inspired by Leon, suggesting that if he had survived, he would likely have become close friends with Makoto, potentially forming a trio with Makoto and Sayaka. This is supported by class photos showing them together, hinting at a potential narrative thread that was never explored. This relationship could have added depth to Makoto's character and made his optimism more realistic by showing it develop through genuine friendships, rather than it coming out of seemingly nowhere.

Including Leon and Sayaka in the story would have not only supported Makoto's 'optimistic' character trait through their friendship but also balanced out the stoicism of Kyoko and Byakuya. This balance is necessary, in my opinion, because Makoto often gets overshadowed by the two, who generally aren't very friendly, creating a rather unbalanced group dynamic.

Just as Sayaka relies on intuition and Kyoko depends on logic and facts, Byakuya's uptight and overly serious demeanor would clash with Leon's more light-hearted and playful nature. With Kyoko and Byakuya providing logical perspectives and Sayaka and Leon adding emotional depth and sentimentality, the group dynamics would have become more engaging and interesting, in my opinion.

I would have enjoyed seeing Sayaka and Leon embody the themes of talent, alongside Makoto and Junko symbolizing hope versus despair, with Kyoko representing mystery, thus tying together Danganronpa's main themes, with Byakuya taking on the role of the crucial anti-hero of the story. I also feel that this would have been much better than what we originally got, to be honest.

These are just my thoughts, but I'd love to hear your ideas too.

Oh, and maybe I should note that the official character list for THH goes exactly as follows: Makoto, Sayaka, Leon, Kyoko, and Byakuya. So, I shared an official picture of them together at the top! It makes me really happy.

Thank you for reading. :)

[haunted-phantom-student]

Petition to allow more female protagonists to be:

- selfish

- short-sighted

- irrational

- weak-willed

- unintelligent

- misguided

- egotistical

- untrustworthy

- superficial

- anti-heroic

- someone you wouldn't want to hang out with in real life

- someone you would want to hang out with in real life if only for the entertainment value

- realistically flawed

without these characteristics turning them the villain.

Petition to give them even stereotypically female flaws that are explained not by their gender, but by their human lack of perfection.

Petition for female characters to be allowed to be shitty without giving up their status as the hero of the story.

Petition for female characters to not have to be stronger, wiser, and smarter than their male counterparts in order to be considered a "good" character. To let them do boneheaded things. To let them hurt people when they aren't trying to. To let them hurt people when they are trying to. To let them be not naturally skilled at caretaking, motherhood, and emotional support. To let them be damaged.

Petition for heroines to be allowed to be *humans*