#Considering what childish antics you consider humorous.

[predatory-predilection]

I am forced to admit that some performances of musical theatre are of a markedly higher quality than some renditions of Shakespeare's works.

[etheries1015]

Yk throughout Lilia's past thing I wonder why in the old OLD wars people don't use verbal bullying as a weapon- Killing is already included in physical bullying so why not go all out?

Imagine past Lilia with this one friend aka you who fights the annoying humans with money, curses, and (out of pocket) words instead of the traditional going to war way. Verbal bullying can reduce the enemy's morals (probably).

"Instead of worrying about our MoRaLs, why don't you start worrying over YOUR DRIER THAN THE AFTERGLOW SAVANNAH SCALP"

"Our ruler's temper isn't too good, but that kingdom's ruler is bad tempered AND ugly"

"If yall didn't stink so much, maybe the faes wouldn't have found you so easily"

Also

You: You should watch your steps, the floor of this mansion is slippery after all :)

Enemy: Is that a veiled threat?

You: What veil?

People say that the place where faes live are surrounded by thorns, but you have thorns in your mouth ;)

NO BUT THIS IS SO FUNNY. Instead of using your incredibly impressive fighting skills (Lilia has seen firsthand) you first choose the most outrageous and...unique insults and strategies he had ever heard and seen his entire life. Sometimes Lilia can't tell if you are truly affected by the fighting, or if you had gone simply insane and cannot feel complex emotions; numb, to be frank. Upon asking you such questions, In response you shared to your comrades; "Some people cope by sadness and despair, others cope by humor and lightheartedness. I choose the latter- for I would rather live my life smiling at the most ridiculous of things than sit in a puddle of my own tears and trauma."

Thus, you delve deep into the theatrics as a way to distract yourself from the true horror of things.

"Dang, you really went to war looking like THAT? Even I would pity you, and that says a lot!"

"You have the intelligence of a soggy piece of bread! Didn't you hear ANYTHING about subtly?"

"Oh yeah, you're definitely first to die in any scenario. You check all the boxes. I'm surprised you haven't managed to kill yourself by now! Congrats!"

"You're living proof that you do not need to be funny to be considered a clown!"

"damn, human AND ugly? Pick a struggle, to have both is truly a crime!"

I imagine that this MC really enjoys distracting people with long winded prologues or speeches. With fake tears in their eyes, sobbing in front of a wave of humans with their arm up to the sky-

"I would like to thank my mother for this grand opportunity, my pet snake, and my dear beloved and far too soon departed friend Lilia-"

you hear from a distance an annoyed fae yell "I'm not dead!"

you ignore him.

"And to all of you, my grand audience, for granting me this wonderful chance to demonstrate what it truly means to be ignorant."

Confused glances around the humans- before collective screaming as they are all falling into a pit that you lead them to. Lilia catches up to you and stares at the handful of human soldiers who fell into your trap with hands resting on his hip and raised eyebrows, glancing over at you impressed.

"Clever, yet...strangely obtuse. Good distraction, it's almost embarrassing to call you one of our strongest generals with your antics..." He hummed before his face taking a flat and annoyed look as you reveled dramatically in his praises.

"Why can't you be normal."

Reader being incredibly childish yet super clever like Clavis from ikemen prince and the personality of Furina from Genshin impact SDLOIHLJ

[masuchu]

“𝐙𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒” [BSD MEN]

what happens when the bsd men’s gf gets zoomies? ‧₊˚

genre. fluff !! kinda silly ngl . perhaps ooc but idk

characters. dazai, chuuya & fyodor

love, masu. this has been rotting in my drafts for sooooo long!! i polished it off and i love it now!! it’s a very stupid idea, but who even cares

(大哉) 𝐃𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐈 ‧₊˚

Zoomies are contagious for this man. When you start sprinting around your shared apartment for absolutely no apparent reason, he questions nothing and joins you.

As much as he finds it amusing to sit back and watch you run around like a toddler, he feels the childish longing to join you bubbling up inside him.

When you crash into things? He crashes into them too! You’ll clean later, for now, he’s perfectly content to copy your strange antics.

However, he can only last so long running around like a lunatic. He will be worn out by the end of your spree!

“Bella, how are you still going? I feel like I’m going to die…”

You halted your movements and peered down amused at your heaving boyfriend, strewn out clumsily on your sofa.

“Aw, can’t keep up Samu’?” You teasingly muttered against your lover’s lips, much too close to escape without being gripped firmly and ambushed with kisses.

“Haha! Leave me alone!” You giggled at the ticklish feeling of his lips teasing all around your face.

“So long as you stay here with me and stop giving yourself whiplash~”

You giggled again. “For you.”

(中也) 𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐔𝐘𝐀 ‧₊˚

Oh my god, not a day goes by where you don’t severely decrease the concentration of braincells in this man’s head.

When suddenly begin to dart around his million dollar apartment with seemingly zero spacial nor social awareness, you actually stun him.

Jaw dropped, eyes switching from wide to squinted every few seconds, completely and utterly speechless.

What the fuck were you doing?? This man loves you with every fibre of his being, every inch of his soul— however, sometimes you really do make him question if you were, well, okay.

When he gets over his initial shock, he shakes his head and pretends it never happened. He may chuckle and call you something along the lines of ‘damn weirdo’, but he really does love you and your oddness!

Your heavy breaths are all that can be heard throughout the room, hands on your hips in attempt to allow more oxygen into your lungs.

“Ah! I’m so tired, what are you drink— Why are you looking at me like that?”

You finally take notice of your boyfriend’s humorously perplexed stare, and shake your head at his expression.

“What on earth was that?!”

“What was what?”

Chuuya blink twice and lets his head fall back, allowing a mix of a groan and a laugh to escape his lips.

“Forget about it.”

(费奥多尔) 𝐅𝐘𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑 ‧₊˚

Fyodor tends to allow you to do your thing in these situations.

He understands you aren’t looking for attention, your nerves are just going haywire. So long as you don’t break anything or kill anyone (anyone important, at least), he is perfectly content with carrying on with his work and leaving you to your devices.

That is, until you do break something.

The torment you put this man through is humorous, considering his occupation and life goals. He prays he may live one day without something happening.

“What, exactly, am I looking at?”

You look down at the shattered vase on the floor, and let out a shaky laugh. A laugh that was more of a ‘shit! I am in trouble’ rather than a ‘this is very funny’.

“Urm. Well, I sort of crashed into the table. And then, it kind of, very much fell off and shattered.”

A moment that was much too long for you liking passed by painfully. You shuffled from foot to foot, and placed you gaze anywhere but your lovers face. It was not in Fyodor’s nature to feel empathy, but he didn’t care about the vase. And he supposed it would be a hassle to deal with you in an apologetic and guilty state…

“It is fine, I didn’t care for it much. Though, please refrain from destroying any more of my ceramics when you continue… doing whatever you were doing.”

“I will try. And it’s called ‘zoomies’!”

“….Right.”

2024 © masuchu , do not repost, reword, plagiarise, take inspiration, translate or share my work anywhere!

[the5n00k]

Hawkeye Pierce: The Good, The Bad, and The Unmilitary

The long awaited first official M*A*S*H character analysis

It's not a secret to anyone aware of this blog that I fucking love Hawkeye. This piece of shit lives rent free in my mind and has lived rent free for the past four months. Which is kind of why I've hesitated so long to make this because he means so much to me (also what's left for me to say about him, he's been around longer than I have, surely he's been analyzed and over analyzed more than I can imagine)

But I relate to him unfortunately so you're going to have to hear about him sorry <3

Her ass is rambling, this is a long post

Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce starts out the series loud and eccentric but relatively level headed most of the time compared to some of the other members of the 4077. Playboy, drinker, anarchist, and pacifist (by technicality only), his really formative episodes for his character going forward to me at least were Dr. Pierce and Mr Hyde and Sometimes You Hear The Bullet. Both his wish to do something, anything to stop the war and his declining mental health because of it are on full display in these episodes. The war took so much from him and keeps taking, especially when Henry dies and Trapper gets shipped home while he's away. He's a desperate animal clawing at the dirt just trying not to fall off the cliff. And he keeps slipping.

One of his biggest weaknesses as a bleeding heart is burning himself out or having zero self preservation. It's admirable how much he does for his patients and camp mates but most of the time it just looks like he has a death wish. But the admiration is exactly what he doesn't want. He's an attention whore sure, but every time he's ever been put on a pedestal he's tried to shake it off; dismissing the news reporters and even yelling at Radar for simply looking up to him. He covers up his self loathing with humor, childish antics, and self inflating bickering with the other surgeons to give him a fake sense of self worth despite thinking of himself so poorly. Just the way he treats himself with ridiculous drinking habits and poor self care in general is rather telling and only gets worse as the series goes on.

That being said, he is also strongly fixated on having a sense of normalcy, demanding more choices of food and taking showers whenever possible just like all the others scrambling to keep some sort of routine. He also frequently sets up dates with the nurses when he can not looking for anything serious. He falls in love/forms attachments really easily so that often gets him in trouble, especially when his coping mechanisms keep him from being real most of the time. And once he loves you, he holds on, still mourning the loss of Trapper throughout the later seasons as if he was dead. Moving on is not an option for him, often retreating back into memories voluntarily or not to cope with being drafted (Hawk's Nightmare, Bless You, Hawkeye, basically any episode where he talks extensively about Maine or his father)

And no matter what happens, no matter how much he hates it, Hawkeye knows he has to keep going or people will get hurt or worse. He knows he has to get up and keep doing his job because he has to. He doesn't like it. He'd rather literally be considered dead than get continuously screwed over by the army (The Late Captain Pierce) but he gets up anyway. Because people depend on him. There have been a few episodes where I believed his mental health may have been improving, after/around season 9, and then Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen happened and I was immediately destroyed.

His arc in GFA, like a lot of the other characters in that finale special, was perfect for his character. He was always claiming things like “sanity is a state of mind” (and talking about chickens a lot for some reason) so to have him finally, horrifically snap and lose it so badly Sidney found it necessary to keep him in a mental hospital felt like the trainwreck I had been anticipating for the entire series. He needed to stop repressing things and actually process the horrors he's seen, all of it stacking up is the reason he broke to begin with. Everyone else has more or less accepted their shitty situation of stitching together victims of the cruelty of warfare but he'd been fighting it for 11 seasons now (something around 4-5 years show time) and eventually the longer the unstoppable force pushes against the immovable object, one of them will break. Then to see him finally confront the fact that him and BJ will probably never see each other again and practically beg for the closure that Trapper never was able to give him and FINALLY get it was so satisfying and a perfect shot to send off the character with. BJ was the only one keeping him focused and on the right track when he'd start going too far, gave him some much needed reality checks, and was the only one to stick with him through everything. He knew every ugly secret and Hawkeye knew his. They both did terrible things in situations they never asked to be in. They were bonded in trauma and whether you read their relationship as romantic or not, they're probably the closest relationship in the series and I couldn't be happier with how they ended off.

Hawkeye is a deeply flawed character (dare I say… problematic) and while his change isn't immediately noticeable in the series, it is striking if you watch an episode from an early episode to a late one, especially regarding his relationship with Margaret. Across many episodes, they mutually earn each other's respect and actually become very good friends, probably second only to BJ and Hawkeye. They've also been through a lot of shit together and are very similar, reacting to the same insecurities and desires in completely different ways. (Affection craving, their disdain for senseless violence, deep seething rage for injustice, refusing to show weakness due to their high positions)

There's some indefensible things this character does I will admit and things that made me say “why would he say that” but in general, I believe he is a very well written example of PTSD and a strong-willed anti-war activist. The term activist is thrown around a lot online but he's pretty much the only one there trying to fix things, even if his efforts are unethical or straight up ineffective. I actually really love that he does some things that I hate. Seeing such a gritty and reactionary protagonist was so striking to me, his unpredictability made watching him react to things fascinating. He's a cornered animal desperately trying to escape being closed in on closer and closer until he lashes out. My job is nowhere near comparable to the mental turmoil of his but I found myself comparing his thought processes a lot to my own. He's self destructive, impulsive, and immature but his energy brings so much to the show and the characters around him. He has such a fondness for everyone in the 4077 that becomes more explicit in the big moments. He'd raise hell for anyone in that compound whether they asked for it or not. Or if they even needed it. He'd just raise hell. It's enrichment for him

[fowlblue]

*Batting my eyelashes unbelievable hard like you don’t even how hard* so about that Daemon AU you have

Oh yeah! It was a while back, I learned of the concept and really liked them- I must confess, I’ve never read His Dark Materials, so consider these… Daemons the concept, without that particular setting.

That said- here’s my picks!

Artemis:

A black cat! While Artemis’s daemon remained unsettled for a very long time due to his confused sense of identity, flitting between forms like sooty owls and black kingsnakes, she eventually settled on the black cat. Clever, quick-witted, and serving as one of Artemis’s only voices of emotion rather than reason, Aurum is secretive and an incredibly accurate judge of character- but unlike Artemis, she doesn’t hesitate to listen to her compassionate, ‘childish’ side.

Butler:

A wolverine. Surprising, given that they’re hardly known for their protectiveness, but Ursa (similar to Butler, her real name is unknown) works alongside him well nonetheless. After a life spent honing her claws and fangs for combat, she found it rather difficult to adjust to the life of guarding a small, defenseless and oh-so-curious child. But where Butler constantly finds himself struggling to maintain his air of professionalism in the messy web that the Fowl-Butler family dynamic happens to be, Ursa has chosen to ignore it altogether- she will say and do what she likes. She doesn’t hesitate to call out Artemis’s flawed logic when she sees it, and has often been the one to urge Butler to question him in the first place.

Holly:

A red squirrel. Small, agile, and adept at hiding, Russano is humorous and rarely takes a situation seriously. This, alongside the fact that he isn’t a large carnivore like many of the other LEP officer’s daemons, has earned Holly much criticism from the others, but for the most part, she’s learned to ignore them. While his teasing can quickly become tiresome, Russo is very bright and knows more than he lets on- he’s helped Holly macgyver her way out of all kinds of situations- joking the entire time, of course.

Juliet:

A pine marten. Ferah is a little vain, but unshakable. Despite being rather small, and not as intimidating as Ursa, Butler’s daemon, Ferah has always had unflinching confidence in whatever task he and Juliet had set their minds to- even, at times, when Juliet didn’t. Prone to pranks and other harmless antics, he’s always quick to lighten the mood- and occasionally, he’ll actually offer some sage advice.

Fowl Senior:

A snow leopard. Myrtenaster rarely speaks, and even more rarely offers an opinion on matters, even if they are of great importance. Well aware that her chosen form isn’t one Fowl Senior would have expected (birds were once traditional for the Fowls), she nonetheless has garnered a respect of her own among the criminal underworld- despite being of a ‘softer’ breed of big cat, Myrtenaster has gotten her claws dirty alongside Senior in the past, and there was no daemon more cunning or ferocious… when the moment called for it. Now, surviving what she has alongside Fowl Senior, all she wants is a peaceful life, and spends her time mostly napping at his feet (and keeping an eye on the twins where she can).

Angeline:

A black swan. Verdauga, much like Angeline, is something of a hopeless romantic, and can often be found reading over her shoulder when he can. Bright but scatterbrained, Verdauga often helps her plan and organize events, and often serves as a gentle voice of restraint when needed. He encourages her to spend time with her son Artemis as much as he can, as he can see how their distance during those two long years has affected him, but both he and Angeline are always left confused when they accidentally push him even further away.

The Twins:

A crested gecko and stellar’s jay, respectively!

- Bryony, Beckett’s reptilian daemon, is always in a sunny mood, even when Beckett himself is not. Well-versed in the nature of other animals and skilled in interpreting language, she is easily able to tell someone’s mood, intention, and truthfulness just through observance alone. Incredibly active, she lives up to her chosen species, constantly leaping and clambering about- much like Beckett, she is rarely still, and rarely silent.

- Deynah is Myle’s ever faithful companion- if only the two could ever see eye-to-eye. Constantly flitting about, she is often anxious and unlike Myles, longs for a sense of stability, not adventure or recognition. She prefers to stay in the shadows, and that is something that Myles cannot agree with- perhaps that is why, even after all this time, she is still (secretly) unsettled.

Opal:

A vampire bat. Somewhat laid-back despite Opal’s nature, Gulo rarely finds it necessary to actually try to intimidate her enemies- often, his mere presence is enough. Carnivorous daemons are somewhat uncommon among the People, which made his choice of form something of a surprise to Opal’s parents. While he’s not the biggest or most dangerous creature, Gulo is still capable of a nasty bite, and he’s perfectly fine if a disagreement ends in spilled blood- either way, he doesn’t care much.

Spiro:

A (blue-eyed leucistic) Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake. Baliss, much like Spiro’s jewelry and loud manner of speaking, tends to draw the eye- and by all means, she doesn’t mind. Relishing in how uncomfortable her presence makes Spiro’s fellow businessman, she shares both his impulsivity and his cunning, her rattling tail the one and only warning they give before violence breaks loose. When there’s no one to intimidate, she spends her time curled around his shoulders (where’s its warm) or loose in the penthouse, near-invisible against the white of his suit or suite.

(Baliss and Spiro also have the honor of being the focus of my single Daemon AU fic- you can find that here)

Britva:

A polar bear. Britva is a cold, brutal man, who makes bloodthirst and violence appear as second nature- given that, is it any surprise that Sawney would take the form of one of the few creatures known to actively hunt humankind? Sawney’s snow-white fur has long since become stained red, a permanent reminder of the brutality she is capable of. A rare sight to see, given Britva’s secretive nature, but if you are to catch a glimpse of her, your time has run out.

[halcyon-writings]

pairing: implied mikey/reader (in which sanzu doesn’t know what to take from the interaction) 

cw: injuries as per tokyorev yk, bonten era uhh idk i forgot

nav.

— at times sanzu wished he was high when mikey was acting this fucking stubborn.

despite the blood running down his temple and even more so from his arm, where he had unfortunately taken a hit as well, bonten’s leader had refused treatment. at least, treatment coming from any of bonten’s doctors.

so now, much to koko’s silent ire at the blood staining his car seats, sanzu ended up driving himself and mikey through some back alleys before footing it the rest of the way there. mikey remained silent, only holding the now dyed red cloth to his head to try and staunch the bleeding.

the building only has one light on the outside, just above the main doorway, it did not ease haruchiyo’s apprehension in the slightest. but mikey pressed forward, so he had no choice but to follow (not like he wouldn’t have followed anyway but still). raising a fist, his fist thumps on the door once and then twice. but when there is no answer he slams the third. 

footsteps behind the door motion that at least someone is there and their grumbles mean they aren’t happy with the late night visitors.

haruchiyo double checks his surroundings, reminding himself that he indeed had his gun tucked in his back pocket and raised his fist once more. but he doesn’t need to knock again, as it all but swings open. 

the pair are greeted by an unamused face, dressed in old sweats with a mug of coffee in one hand while a bat was held in the other. familiarity clings to the back of his mind, just where had he seen them before? 

“oh it’s just you/”

“____.” mikey greets behind him, much to his shock, it was rare for mikey to do the greetings with any sort of meeting, leaving that to either sanzu or ran if the older of the haitaini brothers was around. 

“i don’t have time for this, hurry up, get inside and go sit,” their gaze shifts, and a pointed stare is now directed to haruchiyo, he doesn’t balk, but it was close. 

“tell your bodyguard, he stays outside,” your words aren’t snappy nor do they carry any real attitude, but your tone leaves no room for argument. but then again neither does the sharp look mikey sends his way when he is about to protest. 

despite your cold reception, you handle mikey with a tenderness that haruchiyo feels as though he’s invading upon such a scene (of course he never tells you that, once you’re more acquainted). whispering to one another things that he can barely catch, before the door of this back alley clinic of yours shuts quietly. 

it takes only a few moments, before mikey walks back out, alone, he notes. and was that a new shirt? and despite his silence, just a bit more relaxed. the bandage on his head covers the worst of the cut. and just underneath the sleeve of the new t-shirt can he spot the ends of stitches, no doubt with you as their source. 

the walk back to the car is silent, only the sound of their shoes against the pavement occasionally breaks it. and only then, does sanzu recognize you. 

he had occasionally seen you around mikey and draken, not quite a member of toman but infamous enough to be considered a quasi-member anyway. and with how some of the guys had treated you with respect equal to the president and vice-president, you were all but untouchable. 

sometimes you, like draken, would scold mikey for the childish things he’d do, although you got away with actually giving him a pinch or two far more than draken did. but other times, you would humor his antics, and the pair of you would be scolded by draken in turn. 

but then things fell apart, and now you, like many others, were part of the forgotten past. or so he had believed. 

the question barely leaves his lips when mikey only gives him an indifferent look, simply asking in return, ‘you won’t say anything, right?’ 

when prodded by a snapping kokonoi and even more curious rindou, about where they had gone or why mikey had refused treatment, that secret is kept tucked away. 

[dudeandduchess]

Kyo ruining his own birthday cake by eating all of the sugar in the house before you *ahem* his wife can use it in a cake

Oh my god, bby. The giggle that came out of me was inhuman. 😂

Also, ✨🔥🎉🎂HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SWEET BABY KYŌ!!!🎂🎉🔥✨ More fics will be up within the week, hopefully. Some of them will be smutty. 👀

___

Kyōjurō x F!S/O: Sweeter than Sugar (Fluff, Modern AU, SFW Scenario)

Note: I’ve been getting a lot of requests to add the kids in, so they’ll be mentioned here.

***

“I know I just bought it last week,” (Y/n) muttered under her breath; eyebrows furrowed in mild frustration, as she rummaged through the cupboards in the kitchen. No matter how hard she looked however, she couldn’t find the bag of sugar that she had gotten specifically to make her husband’s birthday cake.

Frustrated couldn’t even begin to cover just how she felt, as she already had the other ingredients pre-measured out on the counter. All that was missing was two cups of sugar, but she couldn’t— for the life of her— figure out just where she had put it.

“Kyō?” The young woman called aloud, finally getting up on her feet after having gotten down on all fours earlier.

“Yes, love of my life?” His cutesy nickname was sweet, and it almost made her want to giggle, but it was dampened by the reminder that she only had until six to get Kyōjurō’s cake ready for his birthday dinner.

Instead of yelling her reply though, (Y/n) marched out of the kitchen and made a beeline for the living room; where she had last left her husband with a bowl of popcorn.

The sight that greeted her, however, had her inhaling sharply as she pursed her lips tightly— if only to hold back the laughter that threatened to bubble free from her lips.

Because, right there, sprawled out on the couch was her husband… only, he was tilting the bowl up to his mouth, while his tongue kept darting out to make the popcorn stick to the tip of it.

“Why are you eating your popcorn like a lizard?” (Y/n) asked, with disbelief and a little bit of humor coloring her tone as she quirked and eyebrow at him.

Kyōjurō merely grinned at his wife, not even bothering to put the bowl down as he answered, “Ran told me about it. She thought that she was such a genius… and I think she might be.”

“Kyō…” (Y/n) couldn’t help it, she began laughing at her husband’s antics— especially when it had been fueled by their youngest child’s whims all along.

“See, clean hands, baby.” The blond raised his hands up slightly, even going as far as to wiggle his fingers; making his wife laugh even more, since he looked so childish doing it.

However, when her laughter died down, she couldn’t help but sigh contentedly and let her grin taper down into a pleased smile— one that had Kyōjurō mirroring her expression just as softly.

And, slowly, he got up from the couch and set the bowl on the coffee table, before turning back to his wife and opening his arms for her. “The birthday boy wants a hug.”

Only a heartless wench would have been able to refuse him, when he looked that adorable.

So, without dwelling on it, (Y/n) crossed the room and let Kyōjurō envelop her in a tight hug; giggling and shyly turning her face away from him when he began to loudly kiss her right cheek.

All the kissing noises, and all of the flustered laughter coloring the otherwise silent house.

Had the kids been there instead of with Senjurō though, (Y/n) was sure that they already would have put her in a dog pile of hugs. They took so much after Kyō so much, after all… if their hair and eyes weren’t already enough of a giveaway.

“What did you want, baby?” Kyōjurō asked after a minute of just cuddling up with his wife, gently nudging his nose against the apple of her cheek, while he let his lips continuously brush against her skin.

If (Y/n) were to be honest, she would say that she had to have a minute to think— as he was making it so hard to focus, so she could remember why she went to him in the first place. But she refused to give him even more of a leverage, so she wracked hard through her brain and eventually breathed out, “The sugar. Uh… we’re out of sugar. Did you eat it?”

The blond’s eyes widened at that, but he quickly composed himself and hugged his wife tighter; with one hand making its way up to cup her cheek and turn it, all so he could press his lips to hers.

“Have I told you how pretty you look, sweetheart?”

(Y/n) wasn’t buying it, however. “Only ten times since your dad and Senjurō picked up the kids.”

“I’m being ho-”

“Kyōjurō,” (Y/n) drawled out, while pulling herself out of his grasp and quirking an eyebrow at him. It was the equivalent of her crossing her arms and tapping her foot when she was lecturing the kids— and it was making the blond panic.

Since he couldn’t tell her that he had eaten it with the kids; all because they goaded him into eating it throughout the week. Add in the fact that he had picked up some Kool-Aid from the grocery store a few days ago and poured in a lot of the sugar, even when his wife had told him to use it sparingly.

He didn’t even know how to react— much like a deer in headlights. So, he did the only thing he could think of…

Kyōjurō cupped his wife’s cheeks with both hands and pulled her in for a heated kiss. “Let’s have another baby.”

And to his surprise, that had his wife blinking rapidly— as if to clear her thoughts, while a flustered grin made its way up onto her face. They had been considering having one last baby before, and that just cemented their plan into becoming a reality.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah… yes. Very.” It had been a last-ditch effort to get out of trouble, but the more that he thought about it, the more that he realized that he really wanted it to happen. Especially if it would finally give him the chance to have a child that captured just how lovely his wife was.

His life sure turned out sweetly; much sweeter than the bag of sugar that he and the kids had totally obliterated in the past week.

[lady-divine-writes]

Good Omens - A Corpse, Cake, and a Cuppa (Rated NC17)

Summary: Aziraphale is Death and Crowley is the serial killer who keeps murdering to catch a glimpse of the ethereal being he fell in love with. (1714 words)

Notes: Written for the above Halloween prompt from @new-endings/M.A.D.#8943. Human Crowley au. It’s kind of gory, I’m not going to lie.

Read on AO3.

“Jesus Christmas!" Aziraphale yelps, tiptoeing through the thick pool of red coagulating on the concrete. Threads of it cling to the soles of his shoes when he lifts his feet as if trying to drag him down. Aziraphale has seen a great deal of blood in his time. None of it has been pretty. But this is especially gruesome.

He wonders if that’s for his benefit.

"Look at... look at this! Look at all the… !” Aziraphale takes a pause and breathes in deep, pressing the thumb and forefinger of his right hand to his forehead. Tension causes a vein to distend and throb - quite the feat since, as a non-human entity, he shouldn't be able to experience this kind of pain. Or so he thought. In the thousands of years he's roamed earth reaping souls, he's finally found the one mortal who can give him what humans call a migraine. And he doesn't like it. Not one bit. “Could you please just… stop already?"

Crowley grins, thrilled giddy by the arrival of his intended audience. “No,” he replies, shoving the slicked head of his filthy ax deeper into the severed spine of the fresh corpse at his feet.

Aziraphale grimaces as the blade lands with a resounding slap. 

That ax of Crowley's gets on every one of Aziraphale's nerves. It's effective for its purpose but positively unsanitary. It makes his skin crawl every time he sees it.

Crowley lifts it slowly, eyes Aziraphale menacingly.

Eyes his nice, clean coat, Aziraphale realizes.

“Crowley!” he warns, putting both hands up in defense. “Don't you dare... !”

But Crowley doesn't let him finish, hoisting his ax higher with part of the dead man's torso attached. He doesn't need to do anything after that. The torso falls from the blade and splashes down in the pool, accomplishing what Crowley set out to do.

“Holy... GAH!” Aziraphale leaps back to avoid the spray. He frowns at his clothes when he sees he wasn't quick enough. "Look what you've done! You’ve made a mess of my coat!”

“Improved it, I’d say,” Crowley snarks. “Given it a pop of color.”

“I've had this coat for ages and hadn't collected a single stain! Not one! And look at your shoes! Ruined!" He gazes down at Crowley's feet in despair. "I actually liked that pair.”

“Really?" Crowley tilts his head, batting his eyes innocently. "You didn't tell me that.”

“Yes, well... " Aziraphale busies himself fishing a handkerchief out of his pocket. Praying he’s swift enough to save the fabric, he pats at the specks on his sleeve "... it’s not my place to tell a homicidal maniac that he looks fetching in snakeskin, is it?”

Crowley pouts, his lower lip jutting out, making him look comically childish despite the streaks of blood running down his cheeks. 

Aziraphale’s brows pull together. He glances around, trying to work out what's wrong. "What? What is it?"

"You're being mean."

"How am I being mean?"

"You're calling me names."

"Accurate ones, yes."

"You sound disappointed."

"You think so!?"

“B-but... but why? I took your advice!" Crowley argues. "I changed me m.o.!”

“I didn’t give you advice! I said you should stop killing innocent people!”

“I did! This guy?" Crowley plants the heel of his sopping shoe into the dead man's crooked neck for emphasis. "He weren’t innocent! He was a serial killer, too! He just happened to be shite at it!”

"I can see that." Aziraphale peers into the vacant eyes of the man on the ground, spirit buzzing beneath his skin, waiting to be reaped. But Aziraphale is in no rush. In the choice between filling out paperwork and shooting the shite with Crowley, surprisingly, he chooses Crowley. 

Or maybe not so surprising, Aziraphale muses, biting his lower lip and indulging in a private chuckle. He rolls his eyes in disgust at himself right after. What are you doing? Stop that!

"Besides, I'm doin' you a solid!" 

Aziraphale scoffs, snapping back to his senses. "How do you figure?"

"You're Death, ain't ya? I'm keeping you in business!"

"I don't know if you've read the papers lately, dear boy, but humans are dropping like flies thanks to their own stubbornness and stupidity. You're slap in the middle of one of the worst pandemics in history, but instead of doing what you can to stay safe, you lot spend your time arguing over petty b.s.! I won't wear a mask! It's against my rights! I'm not taking the vaccine! It'll make me sterile! There is no disease! It's all a big conspiracy! Meanwhile, in the states, some orange lunatic has everyone drinking bleach! Believe me, I hardly need your help doing my job!" 

“Oi! Don’t lump me in with those prats!”

“Why not? You’re not wearing a mask, I see.”

“Don’t have to. I got my shot. And I keep me distance.”

“But you’re covered in blood! Did that man you dismembered have the virus!? You don’t know!” Aziraphale cringes at words that sound far more like concern than scolding. Which he should be doing. Scolding and ridiculing, and possibly calling the police.

But he won’t.

If Crowley were thrown in prison, it would be harder for Aziraphale to find an excuse to see him. Aziraphale has yet to decide if that’s something he wants, but either way, he’d prefer it not be at the expense of another life.

"Fine. Whatever. If that's the way you feel about it... " Crowley grumbles, letting what remains of that statement die as embarrassment rises to his cheeks, settling beneath the red already there. He crosses his arms over his chest and turns his face away. 

Just like a child, Aziraphale thinks. 

And as with a child, Aziraphale should have nipped this in the bud much, much earlier - like when Crowley realized that he could summon Aziraphale whenever he wanted by upping the frequency of his murderous antics. 

This, to date, is his twenty-seventh kill.

Aziraphale doesn't know how Crowley spotted him. He's pretty adept at avoiding human detection. But after victim number eight, Aziraphale turned around, scythe in hand, and there he stood: tall, gangly, bizarrely besotted, dressed in black and wearing sunglasses at one in the morning. Aziraphale thought Crowley was a run-of-the-mill psychopath looking for attention, seeing Aziraphale as a hapless dolt to play cat-and-mouse with, not knowing for one second who he was dealing with.

Not only did Crowley know exactly who Aziraphale was, but he had taken a considerable shine to him.

Aziraphale humored the man when their paths crossed so he could get on with his work, never for one minute considering the consequences. Thinking back on their past interactions, Aziraphale can pick out the hints Crowley had been dropping.

Aziraphale played right into them, and he could kick himself over it.

"We have to stop meeting like this," Aziraphale quipped dryly after Crowley had beheaded some poor, down-on-his-luck fool. "I'm going to start thinking that you have a thing for me."

"Finally!" Crowley tossed his arms in the air. "At this rate, I was going to have to murder half of London and spell out the words ’Will you go out with me?’ with their bodies. Do you know how time-consuming that would have been?"

Aziraphale had written that comment off as a morbid attempt at humor. 

Now he feels like an imbecile.

He’s going to get an earful from Gabriel if he ever gets wind of this. Aziraphale has been able to cover up the increase in London deaths by blaming the pandemic. But once people get their acts together and things calm down, he’ll have to come clean.

There’s a serial killer roaming the streets that has a serious crush on him.

Aziraphale lets out a heavy sigh as he comes to a decision.

A bad decision.

He's going to regret this. He knows he's going to regret this. 

But will he really though?

Aziraphale looks Crowley over, still moping with his nose in the air. He examines him at depth - his sharp features, his debonair style (hiding beneath a litre of blood), his devil-may-care attitude, his rowdy sense of humor. If he were another angel, or even a demon, Aziraphale would have asked him out already, body count or no. 

So what is he waiting for?

It’s not entirely unheard of, an angel dating outside their dominion. And as for the moral issues of dating a murderer, well, Aziraphale is an angel. He has a responsibility to bring sinners to the light, help them see the truth. That can be done anywhere, not just in church - on a street corner, in a diner…

Back at his flat.

Besides, he and Crowley have a lot more in common than Aziraphale did with his last paramour, an angel he had dallied with solely for the fact that he was guardian of comestibles.

It seemed like a match made in Heaven, so to speak.

Far from it.

“Look - if I let you take me out for coffee, will you stop the gratuitous bloodshed?”

Crowley all but gasps when that question leaves Aziraphale’s mouth, the grin growing on his face transforming, becoming less maniacal and more… normal if that makes any sense. "One cup of coffee. That's all I ask."

"Then come along. Here… “ Aziraphale snaps his fingers, cleaning Crowley thoroughly before he takes his arm. “If you're good, I'll let you buy me a slice of cake.”

“That’s very generous of you.”

“I’m glad you think so. I’m a very slow eater. And I figure the longer I stay with you, the more I can keep an eye on you."

“Deal. But, you know," Crowley starts, his tone so filled with teasing he’s on the verge of giggles, "if you, say, spent the night at my flat, you could keep an eye on me for hours. Think of all the people I wouldn’t be able to kill.”

Aziraphale smirks, amused that they both had a semblance of the same idea. “You don’t say?”

“I do.”

“That’s blackmail.”

“More so than you bartering human lives against a cuppa and cake?”

Aziraphale shrugs, but he doesn't relinquish Crowley's arm. He does, however, relieve him of his ax so he doesn’t get any ideas along the way. “Fair point.”

[twistedtummies2]

UPDATED: Sinister Sevens - Venom

And now we’ve come to - FOR THE TIME BEING - the last Spider-Man nemesis I’m going to cover with these Sinister Sevens. (I’ll probably make lists for Mysterio, Vulture, and Kingpin as well, but not till later.) My second favorite Spider-Man Villain (and one of my biggest pred crushes from comics), Venom.

Venom is another villain who has been the identity of many characters…not just in comics, but also other media. However, the most well-known and commonly featured version of the character - and the one I’m going to focus this list on - is Eddie Brock. The typical tale of Venom has Spider-Man being exposed to a dark alien being called a Symbiote: a gooey little gremlin that gives him a “black costume,” which he uses for a time…before, slowly, the Symbiote starts to torment him, as it heightens his aggression and brings out the worst of his qualities to the forefront. Eventually, Spidey frees himself of the Symbiote…but this is only the start of the story. The Symbiote attaches itself to Brock - a fellow with a bitter rivalry with Peter Parker - and thus the pair become Venom: one of Spidey’s most dangerous and powerful foes, partially because Brock knows the true identity of the wall-crawler. Making this list was actually the hardest one of them all to do; my opinions on Venom have changed over the years, and after properly revisiting a few incarnations, I found that there were several cases where I liked certain interpretations either more or less than I used to, and figuring out the ranking was REALLY tough, as a result. After much deliberation, I THINK this ranking is accurate. I think. It’s…really hard to say. XD I should also add that Venom is slated to appear in the next “Marvel’s Spider-Man” video game for Playstation, and given how good the original and the Miles Morales game were (and considering the freaking Candyman is slated to be the voice of Venom), I have high hopes that one will make my Top 7. But, we have some time till then, so in the meanwhile, here are My Sinister Seven Portrayals of Venom! (And again, I just want to remind you all, Venom is a kink crush of mine, aaand that MIGHT have biased some of these choices. I’m trash, what can I say? :P )

7. Daran Norris.

Norris voiced several characters in Neversoft’s 2000 “Spider-Man” video game and its sequel, “Enter Electro.” I already mentioned him playing Sandman in the latter, in an earlier list. In the first game, however, probably the most prominent character Norris handled was Venom: the story of the game has Venom returning, and at first, he’s up to his old tricks at trying to ruin Peter Parker’s life. However, thanks to the machinations of Carnage and Dr. Octopus, the dark Symbiote ends up teaming-up with Spidey to take the villains down. This version of Venom is much more comical than most, as the game makes him out to be sort of a doofus: he starts off a threat, but becomes more of a loveable galoot. He’s something of a childish brute here, constantly frustrating Spidey with his antics. I actually find the humor of their interactions really funny, but I think I just prefer a Venom that is, if not necessarily smarter, just less of an obvious dunce, and more of a menace.

6. Quinton Flynn.

Flynn is one of my favorite voice actors, and I truly enjoy his take on Venom in “Spider-Man: Friend or Foe?” I mentioned this game before on my lists for Sandman and the Lizard; suffice it to say, I think Flynn’s Venom can be seen as pretty similar to the Neversoft one, but better, in my humble opinion. Once again, Venom starts off as a threat and an enemy, but ends up teaming-up with Our Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man in order to stop arguably more dangerous opponents. However, instead of Venom being portrayed as a loveable dunderhead with a dangerous and cunning side, the roles are effectively reversed: Venom is arguably one of the nastiest and most unsettling characters in the game, as they really, REALLY play up his carnivorous side, and not for the sake of humor. He’s brutal, sadistic, and unendingly vicious. Instead, the humor comes from Spidey - with his wit and geekiness together - and the more volatile Venom having to put up with it all. You can basically sum it all up with the following bit of dialogue… Spidey: “Spider-Man, Party of Two? Your bad guys are ready. ;) ” Venom: “...Remind me why I haven’t eaten you yet? -_- ” And yeah, this Venom usually uses singular pronouns instead of plural ones. A bit inaccurate, but I can live with it.

5. Keith Szarabajka.

I used to like Szarabajka’s Venom slightly more, but he’s fallen a bit in the ranks. Not by much, but a bit. He played Venom in the video game “Spider-Man: Web of Shadows.” I mentioned this game in the past when talking about Electro. It’s a very middling game, in my opinion - far from the worst, but also far from the best - but the main thing that helps Venom here is that it’s a game where Venom is the main antagonist, and much of the story revolves around his relationship with Spider-Man. The story has Venom starting to infect New York City with a sort of “Symbiote Plague,” with numerous people either being hosts to Symbiotes, being mind-controlled by them, or being turned into Venom-like monsters themselves. Spider-Man goes on an adventure to cure everyone and stop Venom, before the entire city is infected. (Wow, what a topical game this can be seen as nowadays, oi…) In the course of the game, Spidey is infected as well, and thus regains his Black Costume…and the story largely focuses on him having to deal with those old issues again, as he has to constantly choose what the right choice is, between more peaceful and more aggressive tactics. At the end of the story, Spidey has to choose whether to save Eddie Brock (who, in this version, is indicated to have once been his friend), or let the man die alongside the monstrous Symbiote that has controlled both their lives for so long.

4. Hank Azaria.

In “Spider-Man: The Animated Series,” we actually know Eddie Brock for a good while before he ever becomes Venom. In this version, he’s depicted as a rival of Peter Parker’s, but not necessarily a bad person; he’s someone determined to get the limelight, and he��ll go to nearly any length for it. As time goes on, Brock’s life starts to crumble, and so when he encounters the vengeful Symbiote, he becomes a particularly spiteful and fiendish Venom. Azaria really set the standard for what Venom’s voice and personality would be like, at least outside of comics, and I really love the look of the character - especially the red and blue highlights creating a visual mirror to his nemesis - but my main problem is that much of Spidey’s conflict with Venom feels rushed. A lot is squeezed into just one episode, and after that episode, Brock just kind of vanishes, and only returns for two more outings before meeting his final departure. I would have liked to see more of Venom, and see the show take its time more with the character; other villains had relatively few appearances but felt better handled overall, in my opinion. To be fair, good pacing was always one of the major issues with this series, in my opinion, so I guess that’s more the program’s fault than a problem with Venom himself. And for a long time, this was the definitive Venom to me, so I guess it was doing something right.

3. Tom Hardy.

Hardy’s Venom…leaves me conflicted. The first movie was a hot mess, while the second movie, while an improvement, was ultimately still just “okay” overall. I seriously don’t quite get why so many people went mad over either one. Part of this ties into my issue with Hardy’s take on Eddie Brock himself: one the one hand, the advertising for the first film was really pushing this as a dark story with a really nasty protagonist, playing with the psychological agony and descent into madness we’ve seen in other interpretations. That, of course, isn’t really what we got: the relationship between Brock and his Symbiote is instead played up more like a pair of bizarre lovers or a sort of buddy-cop picture, with the fairly sensible, Average Eddie (as opposed to Average Joe) having to put up with Venom’s mixture of animal aggression, unending hunger, and alien tendencies. On the flip side of things…I have to admit, I legitimately like the relationship! It’s not what I was promised, but it IS fun to watch, and Hardy is a great actor who pulls it off and just has fun with it all. And in the second film, I already knew what I’d get, and it was interesting to see how things played out with that in mind. I also have to say that, for all the faults these movies and this interpretation might have, it’s really interesting to see a take on Venom in a world where there isn’t a Spider-Man. I still have mixed feelings about the little Eddie Easter Egg in “No Way Home,” and vice-versa the “Now Way Home” Easter Egg in “Let There Be Carnage,” but I guess part of what’s fascinating about this portrayal is having a Venom without a visible Peter Parker. I struggled for a while with where to place this version, and ultimately, I decided on third place: I love it a lot, but much like Patrick Page’s Green Goblin, I don’t think I can go any higher ONLY because EVERYTHING ELSE SURROUNDING IT is kind of “meh,” at best. :P

2. Arthur Burghardt & Daniel Capellaro.

While Azaria and Szarabajka are takes on the character I feel have aged less well over time, this is a case of a Venom that I think has aged better. (I do wish they’d used the same voice actor for Brock in and out of costume, like in many other incarnations, but that’s really just a nitpick.) This take on Venom appeared in the game “Ultimate Spider-Man,” set in the comic book universe of the same title. The story focuses on both Spider-Man AND Venom getting tangled up in a complicated conspiracy, which ultimately leads to the creation of Carnage and involves such villains as the Green Goblin, Electro, Rhino, and more. The story is actually told through two parallel lines: players alternate being handling Spidey AND handling Venom, as the pair’s dual storylines criss-cross constantly. As Spider-Man, it’s a typical sort of Spidey game: save civilians, fight the bad guys, etc. But as Venom, players have to DEVOUR INNOCENT PEOPLE (including kids, I should add, YIKES) and face off largely against more heroic characters, such as Wolverine. Playing as the bad guy is somewhat unique, and the way Brock’s story pans out as the game goes on, and we see how he develops as a character, and how his relationship with Peter works, is pretty interesting. Another game, “Battle for New York,” tried something similar to all this, with players alternating between playing Spidey and the Green Goblin, and taking place in the same comics universe…but it was less successful, in my opinion, compared to this one. I guess what we can learn from this is devouring innocent kids with balloons is the way to better games. (pauses) Wow. That got dark. Sorry.

1. Benjamin Diskin.

Yep. Jack from Beastars played Venom, and while he isn’t the definitive voice of the character for me (I’m not sure what that would be, to be honest, off the top of my head), he’s nevertheless a brilliant portrayal. In “Spectacular Spider-Man” (yeah, that show again), just like in the 90s Animated Series, Diskin plays Brock long before Venom ever comes onto the scene. In this version, Brock is one of Peter Parker’s best friends, alongside Harry Osborn; in fact, he and Peter are practically brothers! However, as the show goes on, Brock starts to resent Peter more and more, as his “Spider-Manning” forms a rift between the two. Things only get worse when the Symbiote comes into play. Just like Azaria, this Venom was particularly spiteful and nasty, but this is where things get interesting: instead of just disappearing after his first defeat, Brock actually remains a recurring presence in the show, building up the next battle between himself and Spider-Man. This made the encounters between the wall-crawler and his enemy all the more special, because the relationship between the pair OUT OF COSTUME was REALLY the real focus, and we got so much buildup and development there that it meant that when Venom did rear his ugly mug, it was always a big deal. He’s also one of the few characters, if not the ONLY character, who DIDN’T suffer from the fact this show got a third season. When Venom left the series for the last time, it actually felt like a satisfying way to go; even if we HAD gotten a third season, and still had never seen Brock again, I don’t think I would have minded much. I can’t think of too many other characters where that was the case (seriously, my ONLY complaint with this show is we never got more of it), and as a result, one could argue Venom was probably the best-handled part of the whole series. For that reason above all else, Benjamin Diskin takes the cake as My Favorite Venom. (And since this is Venom, we’ll assume that cake was chocolate…bravo if you got that joke.)

[milfgyuu]

Give Me Attention or I’ll die! → Pairing: Han Jisung x Fem!Reader Tags: 2.9k, College AU, Fluff, Humor, Alcohol Use, Friends to Lovers. Summary: It’s time for Minho’s annual Halloween Party and silly matching couples’ costumes isn’t the only thing your best friend is talking you into this year.

“Get off of me!” You shouted breathlessly, your giggling now replaced with shallow breaths and angry groaning. It was funny at first, your best friend’s childish antics that led to him tackling you across your bed and piling his full weight on top of you until you gave him what he wanted.

“Not until you agree to come to the party and dress up with me!” He tutted annoyingly and you tried your hardest to wriggle out from under him which only encouraged him to press down on you further, effectively crushing you and making you even angrier.

“Jisung! I swea-,” You tried to yell again, but didn’t have enough air in your lungs to get the words out and started coughing. At that, Jisung rolled off of you to the side but he would not release you just yet, wrapping his arms and legs around you tightly with no intention of letting go. At least with the weight off your chest, you could finally breathe again.

After a few minutes of catching your breath and relaxing your panicked body, you were back to whining and wiggling your way out of his grasp. When you realized he would happily play this particular game all night you finally conceded. “OK, fine. I’ll go to Min’s stupid party and wear stupid matching costumes with you,” You huffed out, exhausted from struggling for the past twenty minutes.

“Ha! I win!” He cheered himself and you rolled your eyes before using a final burst of energy to flip you both over and throwing as much of your body weight into him as possible for revenge. He squirmed and laughed a bit and you tried your best to actually make him suffer but he only laughed at you until you accidentally wiggled a little too much and he froze entirely.

“Alright. Knock that off now before I embarrass the both of us,” He said flatly and this time he didn’t fight you when you flew out of his arms and across the room.

“Ji! What the fuck dude?!” You shouted in horror, grabbing a book off your dresser and chucking it at him. He dodged it easily and laughed at your look of disgust, delighting in the way you’re blushing and cursing at him.

“So, about those costumes…” He started with that ridiculously mischievous look that you simultaneously loved and hated so much.

How and why you ever became friends with Jisung was an absolute mystery to you. Honestly, he just showed up one day and invited himself into your life and never left. Quite literally, he sat next to you in class in your first year of high school and immediately started talking to you. After class he followed you to lunch, then he ended up walking home with you and now several years later you’re attending the same college and you’re practically next-door neighbors though you might as well live together with how often he invites himself over.

Jisung was loud, outgoing, and confident as opposed to your quiet, sarcastic, cool demeanor. The two of you have always complimented each other really well and take turns being each other’s better half. Tonight you’re not sure who’s the ‘better half’ but you’re definitely the smarter half. Or, maybe you’re not, considering you allowed him to talk you into these stupid outfits.

You’re Peter Pan and Tinkerbell. Except you’re the leader of the lost boys and Jisung is wearing a short, skin-tight green dress and fairy wings. You don’t look half as ridiculous as he does and you have to give him props because; One, he hasn’t complained once about the dress riding up constantly, and two, his legs look really nice. He even had you douse him in highlight and body glitter because Ji is the definition of “Go big or go home.”

The party is in full swing and Minho and Felix’s shared apartment is filled with people. Thankfully many of them you know, lessening the stress of hanging out with strangers, and everyone is having a great time. You’re also thankful that your friends seemed to share the idea of coordinating costumes. Woojin was a cowardly lion, Seungmin was in all silver searching for a brain, Hyunjin embodied the tall lanky scarecrow, Jeongin was the wicked witch, and Chris was in a blue mini skirt with ruby red slippers.

The other three really stole the show with their impression of the Power Puff Girls. Minho was in all pink as Blossom, Felix looked stellar in blue as Bubbles, and Changbin was begrudgingly dragged into being Buttercup, but he was really rocking the black and green mini dress. He also fits the personality profile pretty well with the heavy sighing and eye-rolling. You had to keep from spitting your drink out when he flopped back on the couch, legs spread wide and dress hiked up high on his thighs, not a care in the world.

Chris is in the kitchen passing out drinks left and right and your little fairy is on his sixth jello shot and becoming clingier by the minute. You’ve made yourself comfortable sitting on the kitchen counter conversing with an animated Seungmin about his upcoming photography competition while absentmindedly patting Jisung’s head as he nuzzles it into your arm like a cat.

Jisung is a lightweight and you know it well because you always end up being his designated babysitter. Not just as his ride home, you’re responsible for him all night whenever you’re out. You really don’t mind though, rather than being obnoxious and troublesome when inebriated, Jisung is a happy lush. The moment the alcohol hits his system, he’s attached at your hip, smiling serenely and giggling at anything you say. He’s pretty easy to manage since he stays by your side and preens happily when you spare him a lick of affection.

After a few hours, the party starts to quiet down. People passing out on couches or calling for an uber and you think it’s about time to head home as you catch Jisung’s yawn. You follow him around as you both say goodbye and he insists upon bear-hugging each of his friends. You end up having to drag him away from Minho who is also three sheets to the wind before you can get him in the car.

As you pull out of the parking lot, Jisung leans over the center console to press his cheek to your shoulder, looking up at you serenely, “Jagiya, I’m soooo hungry!” He pouts, utilizing his favorite pet name for you.

“Ji, you just ate four slices of pizza and had six jello shots. How are you still hungry?” You asked him with a disbelieving laugh.

“But you know I’m always hungry and that was just an appetizer,” He whines, poking at your side until you swat him away.

“Okay, okay! What do you want?” You ask with a huff.

“Ms.Lin’s?” He asks with the absolute biggest, most ridiculous puppy dog eyes he’s ever used on you.

“Ms.Lin’s? Jisung, that’s like twenty minutes in the opposite direction of home.”

“Jagiya!” Jisung whines again, bouncing in his seat and you can’t help the smile that shows because come on. He’s a glow in the dark, sparkling fairy pouting and begging for food and it’s impossible not to smile.

“You are lucky I love you and that you look so cute right now,” You roll your eyes, making a u-turn and heading south toward the best Korean food in town while Jisung smiles triumphantly and turns on the radio.

An hour later you finally pull into the parking lot and begin making your way up to your apartment to dig into dinner. You end up laughing the whole way up the stairs and down the hall to your door watching Jisung try to balance three bags worth of food he insisted on carrying himself. Old Ms.Lin herself about fell over at the sight of Jisung in his Tinkerbell get up and ended up sending extras in thanks for a good laugh.

When you finally managed to get the door open Jisung sets the food down on the living room table with a huff and flops back onto your couch, grabbing the remote to start Netflix while you head to your room to change into your favorite sweats, black hoodie, and fuzzy socks. When you come back out of your room, Jisung is sprawled on the cushions, with a mouthful of food.

“Yah! Sungie!” You complain, startling him out of his thoughts, “Get your sparkly ass off my couch! There’s glitter everywhere!”

“Jagiya! Why are you being so mean?” He whines as you’re tugging at his arm, pulling him off the sofa and toward your bathroom.

“I’m not being mean. You’re being dramatic,” You retort, sitting him on the toilet seat while you grab a washcloth and begin scrubbing at the shimmer and highlight he’s covered in from his chest up.

When you’re finally satisfied, you pull him up and over to your room before sitting him on the bed and digging around in your dresser until you find a pair of his sweatpants and a long-sleeved tee you may or may not have stolen from him a while back. He eyes them suspiciously as if he hadn’t realized they were even missing before you leave him to change.

After grabbing some drinks from the kitchen you drop down on the couch with your legs crisscrossed under you and pull the table flush against the couch to reach the food easily. You almost jump out of your skin when Jisung turns off the overhead lighting before turning on the side table lamp so it wasn’t so bright. He smiled in satisfaction at your scare and climbed into the seat next to you.

You continued watching the Halloween themed baking show he had put on earlier while you ate in companionable silence. When you finished you pushed the table back to its original position and cleared the empty boxes. When you came back into the room, Jisung was gone but your confusion was short-lived when he came back with your bed comforter in hand and a big dumb smile on his face.

“Can I help you?” You asked with a cocked brow.

“I’m so glad you asked because I am in dire need of cuddles,” He answered with a cheeky grin. One you were determined to shoot down.

“Shall I take you back to Minho’s then?” You asked with a few extra bats of your eyelashes.

“Jagiya, how can you turn down cuddling with all this?” He asks with a very serious face, the hand not holding the banket gesturing down the length of his body.

“Easily,” You said, turning away from him to press play on the movie you selected, “Have a seat lover boy.”

The next twenty minutes was a true testament to your resolve as you tried your best to ignore Jisung’s obnoxious pouting. He sat opposite you with the blanket still folded in his lap and his arms crossed. You could see him out of the corner of your eye frowning and glancing over at you and it really took everything in you not to laugh. Eventually, you got tired of the continuous sounds he was making and turned on him.

“What, Ji?” You asked him, feigned irritation.

“Give me attention, Jagiya!” He cried, finally closing the distance between you and shaking you lightly, “Give me attention or I’ll die!”

You couldn’t hold back the hearty laugh at that. “Sungie, you know you’re not actually Tinkerbell, right?”

He smirked and cocked an eyebrow at you, “Aren’t I though?”

“Shut up and come here,” You gave in, sitting with your back against the arm of the couch and your legs straight out, Jisung happily laid himself between your legs along the length of the cushions and placed his head on your thigh while you covered your bodies with the blanket.

Jisung hummed happily when you began running your fingers through his hair, your nails scratching along his scalp soothingly. His hand was moving lightly against the outside of your thigh and you thought that you had never been more content. It seemed that he felt the same way when he patted your thigh, getting your attention before saying, “Would you get mad at me if I told you this was my favorite place in the world?”

Your fingers stopped their ministrations for only a moment before he wiggled his head against your leg, encouraging you to continue. “Uhh, between my legs?” You asked in confusion earning a loud laugh from him.

“Jagiya!” He exclaimed, rolling over in your lap to look up at you, “You naughty girl!” He teased and you smacked his chest when he mumbled something that sounded like, ‘Bitch, it might be’.

After your joint laughter subsided he was suddenly serious again, “I really mean it though. Anywhere we are together is my favorite place to be,” He says, reaching for your hand still planted on his chest, “Your apartment feels more like home than my own because there’s no trace of you in it.”

“That’s because it’s always a mess,” You chided with a soft laugh and he closed his eyes with an exasperated sigh.

“Jagiya. I’m trying to be sentimental here,” He tells you with his eyes still closed.

“Jisungie,” You mimic his dramatic tone, “You’re still drunk.”

“Am not! Ask me anything!” He pouts and crosses his arms as best he can without letting go of your hand.

“What’s Minho’s youngest cat’s name?” You asked with a cocked brow.

“Fuck,” He sighed again, making you laugh, “That doesn’t mean I’m not sober.”

“Where is the scientific proof, Ji? I wanna see it,” You challenge.

“If I was still drunk, I would have done this ten minutes ago before we started this conversation,” He says before reaching his hands up to grip your cheeks and pulling your mouth down to his.

Your eyes are wide when you first feel his lips touch yours but you quickly find yourself closing them and leaning further into the kiss, accepting his light nibbles and the way he teasingly traces your bottom lip. When you pull back from the strain in your neck, Jisung is absolutely beaming at you and you think to yourself that he has never looked more adorable.

“Wow,” He says, touching his own lips, “That was like the kiss in spiderman.”

“Oh my god, Jisung. Can you not?” You laugh, holding your hands in front of your face to block his view of your bright red cheeks and happy grin.

His cocky little smile graces his features again when he realizes you’re blushing and he grabs your hands in his and holds them to his chest, “But wait, does that make me Peter Parker or Mary Jane?” He asks suddenly.

“Get out of my fucking house,” You laugh, shoving him off your lap to get a head start as you run toward your room.

“Jagiya! Come back! I need more attention! I have to kiss you again or I might turn into a frog!” Jisung yells out while he jumps up to chase you and it doesn’t take long to catch up as your apartment isn’t very big.

“That’s not even the same story you idiot!” You laugh breathlessly as he barrels into you, wrapping his arms and legs around you as you topple onto the bed.

You both lay there panting from wrestling until Jisung breaks the silence to say, “It may not be the same story, Jagiya,” he pauses, “But it’s our story. Now kiss me!” He says as you struggle to get far away from his ridiculously puckered lips that he’s smacking next to your cheek.

“Ew! Ji, you are so corny!” You shout wedging a hand between your face and his lips.

“It’s called Romance, Jagiya,” He mumbles due to the hand pressed against his face but he’s stronger than you and your resolve is weakening with laughter and he manages to get around your hand and peppers your face with kisses.

“Okay, Okay! Knock it off! You’re tickling me!” You giggle and Jisung smirks triumphantly, “I will give you whatever you want if you stop acting like a cheese ball.”

He stops moving and looks into your eyes, suddenly serious, “Anything?”

“Within reason,” You narrow your eyes at him challengingly despite your small smile.

“Be my girlfriend,” He says and it’s not really a question.

“Fine,” You answer simply and he obviously wasn’t expecting it because he has started to whine ‘Jagiya!’ Before his eyes shot open and he just said “Really?”

“Yes, really. Now would you please shut up?” You smirked before scooting up to kiss him again, much more relaxed and familiar this time around.

You both smiled broadly as you pulled away and you tucked your head into Jisung’s chest so he couldn’t see you blushing. You laid there peacefully for a moment before Jisung opened his mouth again.

“Ah! Can’t wait to go home and write this in my diary,” He jokes and you immediately kicked him off the bed before standing up and walking back toward the living room.

“I am already breaking up with you,” You tell him over your shoulder, hiding a secret smile, and he scrambles up off the floor to chase you again.

“Jagiya! Stop running away from my love!”

SKZ M.List | Main M.List

→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms WITHOUT PERMISSION! All stories are copyrighted, Bubblebeom, 2020. ©️

[japannkenn]

(Luca) Summer Heat (rated M) (unpublished/random pieces that I wrote)

Luca doesn’t like children, which is weird, because he technically is one? (He hadn’t been eighteen for that long, and things still felt the same) He does feel bad about it. He’d dealt with them over his years of study in Genova which was always a hassle, but it wasn’t his fault.

He didn’t know why he was intimidated by a couple of adolescents, just on the brink of consciousness of the world around them. Not old enough to worry about things bigger than how fast they can eat their gelato before it melted in the summertime heat.

He guesses he’s one to talk. Even if it’s been three years, he doesn’t feel like he knows anything. He may not be much better than these kids. He doesn’t know who he is. He thought he did. He thought he was starting to figure it out.

That’s why it’s so shocking to see how second nature Alberto is around a band of rowdy twelve year olds in the water, teaching them how to swim. And maybe they weren’t rowdy—just much too much for Luca to handle. He can’t believe how patient he is, how he humors their antics and how easy it is for him.

And he can’t believe how good he looks in that tiny red Bagnino tank top, iridescent purple scales shimmering in the sunlight, practically calling him.

Luca knew this was going to happen, so he brought a book to look down at if Alberto happened to turn back and steal a glance, lest he be caught staring. Because that would be the end of the world considering some of the things they’d done already.

There was a squiggly, fine line to their relationship.

And besides, he wasn’t good with kids. But it was fun to watch anyway. It doesn’t mean he didn’t feel bad.

“Va bene,” Luca hears him laugh from the water, a young girl looking up at him with a red tinge to her cheeks that definitely wasn’t from the setting sun. “If you can hold your breath for ten seconds, I’ll buy you another gelato.”

“Really? And I can pick the flavor?” Her eyes sparkle.

Alberto pauses comically. “No, no. I still get to pick the flavor,” his voice is giggly, and Luca’s heart wants to burst with affection and love.

“Hey! Non è giusto, you have to buy me one too!” A little boy pops up from under the water, eyebrows furrowed up at Alberto.

“Twenty seconds, then?”

“See that one right there?” He points to the same ragazza that he promised a gelato after he’d come back on the shore for a short break, sitting down beside Luca in the sand.

“Uh-huh,” he watches her as she makes a show of back stroking, glancing curiously at Alberto.

“She’s got a massive crush on me.”

Luca scoffs, rolling his eyes. “Ah, I bet that gets your ego nice and excited doesn’t it?”

“Oh yeah,” he jokes, unwrapping an energy bar from his bag. He takes a bite, a quiet moment passes by and Luca awkwardly looks back down at his book. “Nah. I’m just wondering what I did to make her see me that way.” He says idly.

Luca chews his lip anxiously, incredulous. He starts to wonder if this was a trap. What was Alberto trying to do to him?

Whatever it was, it was working.

The Vespa was surprisingly still in commission, ready for a summer of rides down The Downhill, through the narrow roads, twists and turns to the piazza.

But Luca preferred Giulia’s bike whenever he could if she wasn’t using it. But he’d never admit it out loud that the reason he likes pedaling instead is because he thinks it’ll help him become more like Alberto. Physically, anyways. He was quite jealous, really, in this delicious, sensual way.

Actually, he thinks he’d tell Alberto the reason, if only he would ask. He wishes he would ask. He probably never would, because it was almost like he already knew.

“Don’t you wanna ride your fancy Vespa instead? Why do you need my bike?” Giulia even asks one day, putting Luca on the spot as he’s hopping on for a twenty minute cycle around the piazza.

“Let him use it. He needs the exercise,” Alberto says coolly from the porch, Machiavelli slung helplessly over his shoulder as he’s bringing him back inside from a bath.

Luca’s heart drops, his face burning red.

It’s almost annoying how bold Alberto is about it. No, it definitely is annoying. And Luca is tired of being constantly envious of his ever growing muscles. “Everyone’s bodies are different, you know?”

Luca glares at him. He’s trying to wash the dishes and not even Alberto was a fun distraction anymore. Just plain annoying. Stupid, dumb Alberto. “Haha,” he sulks.

“What works for me may not work for you,” he shrugs, scratching at his chin and appraising Luca’s body for a moment. What’s worse is that Luca can feel it, each little thought in his mind. What’s even worse is that in a matter of days, he’d become so self conscious about something he hadn’t ever thought about for more than five minutes.

Sure, he’d done his fair share of comparing himself to people, and especially Alberto. But he’d always had a summer fixation, whether that was a good or bad thing depended. It was always Alberto. And it wasn’t always good.

“If you’re really that worried about it, I can help you.”

Luca pauses, squeezing the sudsy dish sponge in his scaly hand. His first thought is to be defensive about it, and he is, but it’s a much lighter approach when he says with a little chuckle for good measure, “I’m not that worried about it.”

“But you are,” Alberto outsmarts him in that easy breezy way, winning another point for the Fluster Luca game. “Just a little. Right?”

When he turns to glare at his asshole of a friend again, he’s got that grin on his face, like he’d proven something, caught Luca in another lie the same way he could when they were fourteen, knowing and unbothered. It’s annoying.

Grumbling, he forces his attention back to vigorously scrubbing some dried alfredo off of a dinner plate. “I could give you training lessons. Just me and you.”

To keep from short circuiting, Luca laughs again, awkwardly.

Training started at eight in the morning the next day, on the beach. Alberto says they need open space to promote a healthy work environment, but Luca just feels put on the spot. He relied on the fact that Portorosso was a sleepy town, and it was unlikely that anyone would be awake this early. Besides the pescheria. Which is probably eighty percent of this town’s population.

Carp.

“Like this?” He asks breathlessly, trying to keep in tune with a swift jog in place, his entire body burning for all of the wrong reasons, not that he feels his ten-pack forming, but he can tell Alberto is watching him. Hard.

Alberto hums, scratching his chin. “No.”

***

Ferragosto this year is when he platonically-maybe-not-so-romantically falls in love with Alberto and Giulia all over again. They’ve got her old radio blasting the anthem of summer’64, il gatto e la volpe, and Luca can’t explain how excited he is to hear it again.

Fireworks burst over the astounding view from The Downhill. They’re finally old enough (well, excluding Giulia, but two legal adults were enough) to be out on their own under the influence of at least two glasses of wine.

It wasn’t that much, but Luca can’t help how giggly he feels, throwing his head back to sing, “Noi scopriamo talenti e non sbagliamo mai,” at the top of his lungs, delighted when Giulia takes the next verse.

“Noi sapremo sfruttare le tue qualità!” Her voice is shaky and cracks unexpectedly, but to Luca, it’s like music to his ears. Another firework rockets to the sky, bursting loudly.

“Dacci solo quattro monete e ti iscriviamo al concorso,” Alberto sings next, stumbling over the words and his voice is incredibly off key, but Luca beams at him, suddenly wanting to cry.

“Per la celebrità!” They all sing together, bursting into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.

He never wants this to end. He wishes this bottle of wine were bottomless, so that the three of them could lay here in the grass forever underneath the inky black sky, lit up by colorful explosions, wiggling his toes freely in the wet grass, his two favorite people in the entire world right by his side, just like every summer.

But it’s going to end. It always did. That was the reality of it, and he always faced it. But just for a little longer, he could enjoy it knowing there was always next year. For now, he could be irresponsible and enjoy this. A little longer.

He reaches over, turning the radio up to the highest volume, cheering loudly over it.

Lui è il gatto ed io la volpe, stiamo in società

Di noi ti puoi fidar,

di noi ti puoi fidare,

di noi ti puoi fidar

There’s plenty of places to makeout in Portorosso, but somehow they’d ended up behind the house because—oh, now he remembered—it’s almost time for dinner, and they wanted to be back before sundown.

Admittedly, Luca was disappointed that nothing intense had happened on their little day trip to Isola del Mare, and to him it was a waste. He never did well with mixed feelings, and he couldn’t help not being talkative on the walk back to the Marcovaldo household.

If Alberto asked, he’d just say he was tired. Which wasn’t exactly a lie, just not the whole truth— because, merda, the swim there and back really isn’t a cakewalk or anything. He felt near exhaustion, leaning slightly against Alberto as they stumbled down the narrow road, street lamps lighting the dusk night.

He doesn’t know what kind of person he’s becoming, but it most definitely isn’t practical.

He stumbles to trail along when Alberto unexpectedly yanks him behind the dark alley-like space between their house and a neighbor’s and Luca groans confusedly because he’s already a little frustrated with Alberto, even if it’s childish and petty.

“What are you—,” A flame ignites like an explosion in his chest when Alberto roughly slams him against the concrete wall by the shoulders, sucking in a deep breath when he feels his chest pressing firmly against his. “Why—,”

All Alberto does is laugh, and Luca would punch the stupid grin off of his face if he could see it in this light. “What’s that you said earlier? Sono felice? If that’s true then why haven’t you said anything since?”

Luca grumbles. “I’m just tired.”

“Uh-huh, right,” he says knowingly, releasing his tight grip on Luca’s shoulders to drop one arm by his side, the other hand planted firmly on the wall by his head instead. It makes Luca feel worse (better? He doesn’t know), the choice to leave or stay looming over him like a playful tease. “You’re upset I didn’t put my hand down your pants earlier, aren’t you?”

“Don’t make fun of me.” Luca’s face heats up and he makes a weird noise of repulsion. “It’s stupid of me, I know,”

“I’ll tell you what…”

Sometimes or more often than not this summer, he doesn’t recognize himself as a top student in Genova, or a loyal son who herded goatfish for most of his life. It’s weird feeling different and thinking about himself like this. And Alberto, his dear friend who showed him this new world above the surface, is now his lover, a little more than just a friend, all and everything in between, and he’s different.

It’s strange.

This was certainly… unexpected.

When they finally come inside right in time for dinner, they’re skittish, and Giulia gives them a look that’s definitely more knowing than confused, but she’s uninformed nonetheless, and Luca can’t help but giggle. He feels like a brat.

He accidentally bumps into Massimo, rustling away from Alberto’s tight grip on his arm. He mumbles a quick mi scusi, sitting down in his seat. “Lo giuro, ragazzi,” Giulia grumbles exasperatedly, setting down cups of water around the table.

Luca steals a glance at Alberto as he picks up his cup for a sip, darting his eyes away quickly when they make eye contact.

“Ragazzi.” Signor Marcovaldo says sternly, and Luca and Alberto flinch. “Help set the table.”

“Certo, certo, sorry about that, papà,” Alberto rushes to the counter, leaning over to take two plates at a time. He sets them on the table, getting the last two. Right as Luca decides he should get up and help too, Alberto is on his way back to the table and they narrowly miss stumbling into each other, Luca letting out a strained little chuckle as they stare stupidly at each other.

Giulia clears her throat loudly, arms crossed.

Luca and Alberto immediately look at her, breaking out into awkward laughs.

“What is it with you two? Veramente,” she takes a seat beside Alberto after he finishes setting down the plates. Luca is next to stand beside Massimo at the counter, grabbing silverware. He can feel his heavy gaze burning holes through his head as he quickly rinses them in the sink, and if he just hurried then—!

“Luca.” Massimo grumbles. Luca flinches again, willing himself to look up at the man towering above him.

“Si?”

“Calmati.”

Luca shivers, drying the forks quickly in a towel. “Oh, sì, scusa,” he rushes back to the table, giving everyone their silverware before shakily taking his seat again. He catches Alberto staring at him again, and he slightly raises his eyebrows like asking stai bene, and Luca nods quickly.

“For dessert, it’s tiramisu,” Signor Marcovaldo says as he sits down, and Alberto’s eyes light up and he gasps excitedly. “For that, you have Giulietta to thank.”

Alberto frowns. Giulia grins smugly at him, and Luca lets out his first real laugh of tonight. “Ah, come on. Can tonight get any worse?” Alberto groans half heartedly, absentmindedly twirling some pasta onto his fork.

“Sure it can. I helped strain the noodles,” Giulia jokes, her mouth full.

“Oh, is that why you’re feeling so tipo tosto tonight?”

“Of course. It’s more than you ever help out around here.”

[somegirlsnerdywords2]

Anime i’ve Watched

That begin with a O (Part 2)!

Yep this is how i’m going to bring over all the anime and manga i’ve watched and posted about on the old blog. It’s not so detailed but it will have to do. Anything new I watch or read from this point on will have their own posts.

Orenchi no Furo Jijou:

Genres: Comedy, Fantasy, Josei, TV short

Synopsis:  On his way home from school, Tatsumi sees a man collapsed near a lake. When he approaches him, Tatsumi notices something strange: the person in need of help is actually a beautiful merman named Wakasa! Because Wakasa's home has become too polluted to live in, Tatsumi graciously offers his bathtub as a refuge. With a boisterous merman as his new roommate, Tatsumi's normal life won't be returning anytime soon, not to mention Wakasa's aquatic friends—Takasu, Mikuni, and Maki—often show up uninvited, making them all quite a handful for the high school student. As he humors their curiosity for human life, Tatsumi sometimes finds himself enjoying their childish antics, but he will have to keep his cool if he intends to keep up with his daily life and newfound friendship. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 8.5/10

Finished airing in 2014 with a total of 13, 4 minute long episodes. 

My Thoughts: A soothing tv short with a fantasy twist and cute guys as far as the eye can see! 

Oshiete! Galko-chan:

Genres: Slice of Life, Comedy, School, TV Short

Synopsis:  At first glance, Galko, Otako, and Ojou are three high school girls who seem like they wouldn’t have anything to do with each other. Galko is a social butterfly with a reputation for being a party animal, even though she is actually innocent and good-hearted despite her appearance. Otako is a plain-looking girl with a sarcastic personality and a rabid love of manga. And Ojou is a wealthy young lady with excellent social graces, though she can be a bit absent-minded at times. Despite their differences, the three are best friends, and together they love to talk about various myths and ask candid questions about the female body. Oshiete! Galko-chan is a lighthearted and humorous look at three very different girls and their frank conversations about themselves and everyday life. No topic is too safe or too sensitive for them to joke about—even though every so often, Galko seems to get a bit embarrassed by their discussions! [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7/10

Finished airing in 2016 with a total of 12, 7 minute long episodes. 

My Thoughts: Cute art/ animation style. An alright short but nothing amazing. 

Otome Youkai Zakuro:

Genres: Demons, Historical, Military, Romance, Seinen, Supernatural

Synopsis:  Second Lieutenant Kei Agemaki, the son of a famous general, has hidden his extreme fear of paranormal beings all his life. However, when he and two others are reassigned to live and work with youkai in the Ministry of Spirit Affairs, he is brought face-to-face with his worst nightmare. Now with the help of the fox spirit Kushimatsu, he and his fellow officers must learn to work alongside youkai maidens—Zakuro, Susukihotaru, Hoozuki, and Bonbori—to solve paranormal cases. Set in the midst of an alternate version of Japanese Westernization, Otome Youkai Zakuro explores the clashes and unions that can occur when east meets west, local meets foreign, and women meet men. The unusual alliance of the youkai maidens and human officers must learn to work together in a world that is changing around them. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 8/10

Finished airing in 2010 with a total of 13 episodes. 

My Thoughts: An interesting (if not a bit cliche) but incomplete anime. Has a manga.... which is also incomplete and updated very, very slowly. 

Ouran Koukou Host Club (Ouran High School Host Club):

Genres: Comedy, Reverse Harem, Romance, School, Shoujo

Synopsis:  Haruhi Fujioka is a bright scholarship candidate with no rank or title to speak of—a rare species at Ouran Academy, an elite school for students of high pedigree. When she opens the door to Music Room #3 hoping to find a quiet place to study, Haruhi unexpectedly stumbles upon the Host Club. Led by the princely Tamaki Suou, the club—whose other members include the "Shadow King" Kyouya Ootori; the mischievous Hitachiin twins, Kaoru and Hikaru; the childlike Mitsukuni Haninozuka, also known as "Honey"; and his strong protector Takashi "Mori" Morinozuka—is where handsome boys with too much time on their hands entertain the girls in the academy. In a frantic attempt to remove herself from the hosts, Haruhi ends up breaking a vase worth eight million yen and is forced into becoming the eccentric group's general errand boy to repay her enormous debt. However, thanks to her convincingly masculine appearance, her naturally genial disposition toward girls, and fascinating commoner status, she is soon promoted to full-time male host. And before long, Haruhi is plunged into a glitzy whirlwind of elaborate cosplays, rich food, and exciting shenanigans that only the immensely wealthy Host Club can pull off. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 9/10

Finished airing in 2006 with a total of 26 episodes. 

My Thoughts: Raise your hand if you believe this series deserves a remake!? I would lose it if they remade this series but the original isn’t all that bad either! Worth a watch if you’re a shoujo lover! 

Outbreak Company:

Genres: Harem, Comedy, Parody, Fantasy

Synopsis: Shinichi Kanou is a shut-in otaku with a vast knowledge of anime, manga, and video games. One day, after applying for a job in hopes of escaping his secluded lifestyle, he is kidnapped and transported to the Eldant Empire—a fantasy world filled with elves, dragons, and dwarves. Trapped in this strange land, Shinichi is given an unlikely task by the Japanese government: to spread otaku culture across the realm by becoming an "Otaku Missionary." To accomplish his mission, Shinichi has the full support of the Japanese government, as well as the half-elf maid Myucel and Princess Petralka of the Eldant Empire. Together with this ragtag bunch, he will overcome the obstacles of politics, social classes, and ethnic discrimination to promote the ways of the otaku in this holy land. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7/10

Finished airing in 2013 with a total of 12 episodes. 

My Thoughts: Not memorable at all. Character design looks nice, very shiny... 

Owari no Seraph:

Genres: Action, Military, Supernatural, Drama, Vampire, Shounen

Synopsis:  With the appearance of a mysterious virus that kills everyone above the age of 13, mankind becomes enslaved by previously hidden, power-hungry vampires who emerge in order to subjugate society with the promise of protecting the survivors, in exchange for donations of their blood. Among these survivors are Yuuichirou and Mikaela Hyakuya, two young boys who are taken captive from an orphanage, along with other children whom they consider family. Discontent with being treated like livestock under the vampires' cruel reign, Mikaela hatches a rebellious escape plan that is ultimately doomed to fail. The only survivor to come out on the other side is Yuuichirou, who is found by the Moon Demon Company, a military unit dedicated to exterminating the vampires in Japan. Many years later, now a member of the Japanese Imperial Demon Army, Yuuichirou is determined to take revenge on the creatures that slaughtered his family, but at what cost? Owari no Seraph is a post-apocalyptic supernatural shounen anime that follows a young man's search for retribution, all the while battling for friendship and loyalty against seemingly impossible odds. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 4/10

Finished airing in 2015 with a total of 12 episodes. 

My Thoughts: Cliche, but not in a fun way. I rarely watch anime involving vampires though so that was a bit fun. 

Owari no Seraph: Nagoya Kessen-hen

Genres: Action, Military, Supernatural, Drama, Vampire, Shounen

Synopsis:  Yuuichirou Hyakuya is finally reunited with his childhood friend Mikaela Hyakuya, whom he had long presumed to be dead. Upon their reunion, however, he discovers that Mikaela has been turned into a vampire. Determined to help his friend, Yuuichirou vows to get stronger so that he can protect Mikaela as well as the comrades in the Moon Demon Company. Kureto Hiiragi receives information that a large group of vampires will be gathering in Nagoya, preparing for their assault on the Imperial Demon Army's main forces in Tokyo. Led by Guren Ichinose, Yuuichirou's team is one of many selected to intercept and eliminate the vampire nobles. With the Nagoya mission quickly approaching, the members of Shinoa squad continue to work towards fully mastering their weapons, while learning how to improve their teamwork. Yuuichirou must gain the power he needs to slay the nobles and save his best friend, before he succumbs to the demon of the Cursed Gear. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 3/10

Finished airing in 2015 with a total of 12 episodes. 

My Thoughts: It somehow got a sequel... still lacking. Plenty of pretty people though with little substance...

[pines-troz]

Weekend With The Warners Chapter Six - Animaniacs & Pinky and The Brain

Summary: When the CEO assigns Pinky and The Brain with the important task of watching over the Warners for the weekend, Brain is prepared for any antics that the children have in store. What he didn’t take into account was forming a familial bond with the kids.

Word Count: 10,710

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27849962/chapters/71433888

Pinky honored Brain’s request by resuming the planned family activities to occupy Yakko and Wakko. The mouse rode upon Wakko’s red cap as they neared the movie theater. His light blue eyes lit up the moment he saw the movie titles on the marquee along with the various movie posters displayed across the side of the building. 

Everyone loved going to the movies! What could be a better way to spend an afternoon than to sit in a dark room with other strangers, munching on expensive snacks, and getting emotionally invested in a movie for two hours? He was especially looking forward to watching a movie about the Furbies! Pinky hoped that this family friendly-animated movie featuring the controversial 90s toys would follow the same beats as other recent animated movies from the past decade: A buddy road-trip journey with a surprise villain twist in the third act (which always shocked him every time!), and all the characters throwing a big dance party at the end to the tune of a contemporary pop song. Pinky would always get up on his feet and dance with the characters on the screen. While Brain would always shield his face at the sight of his enthusiasm, he had a strong feeling that Yakko and Wakko would be more than happy to dance with him before the credits rolled. 

Oh, he and the siblings were going to have such a fun-fun silly-willy time!

Wakko carried Pinky on top of their red hat, zooming around the front of the theater like an airplane. With their tongue lolled out, he blew a raspberry to imitate the sound of a plane soaring through the air. He was eager to go to the movies with Yakko and Dad. Even though it would have been better if Dot and Dadoo accompanied them, Wakko learned from their wisened experiences as a middle child that he couldn’t get what he always wanted and had to accept compromise. But he was willing to make the most out of the afternoon for Dot’s sake. Looking on the bright side of things, the middle child was eager to lounge in the comfy leather reclinable chair while chowing down on the various snacks. Buttered popcorn, cheesy nachos, hot dogs, candies, and a large cup of Abyss Boy soda! But he’ll remember not to consume the entire soda all at once. The last thing he wanted was to have another potty emergency on their hands. Regardless, Wakko couldn’t wait to satisfy their appetite for movie theater food! 

Yakko cautiously trailed behind Wakko and Pinky, masking his worry with a small smile. The normally laid-back smart aleck was glum over Dot’s health. Of course, part of being a responsible older brother was being the main caregiver for his siblings’ needs. And Yakko took pride in tending to Wakko and Dots’ needs, especially if they felt under the weather. The eldest Warner couldn’t shake off the bewildering fact that Dot was being cared for by a good friend, who successfully proved himself to be a competent caretaker, while he and Wakko walked about as if nothing happened. If his sister wasn’t so insistent on going to the movies for her sake, then he would be back at the hotel room tending to her needs like the caring sibling he was. But as a responsible older brother, Yakko kept his word. But going to the movies just wouldn’t be the same without her. He missed having his nacho buddy right by his side. 

The eldest Warner was pulled out of his thoughts the moment he felt his phone vibrate. He fished his phone from his pocket and he noticed the reassuring text message from Brain. 

I commend your concern for your younger sister. Dot is taking a much-needed nap at the moment and she will be okay. : )

Yakko softly smiled at the good news. He was thankful for the mouse’s swift response as well as the contents of the message. “Dot’s fine under Brain’s care…” He reminded himself. He looked over at Wakko and Pinky, who seemed to make the most of their situation as they conversed in their typical eager fashion, almost as if nothing had gone wrong. 

“I’m gonna buy so many snacks!” Wakko exclaimed, flapping their arms excitedly. 

“Troz! And I’ll get to swim in the bucket of popcorn!” Pinky added with an equal amount of enthusiasm. 

Yakko tried to conceal his concern with a small smile and a chuckle. “Yeah, it’s gonna be fun!” He lied with convincing enthusiasm. 

However, Pinky managed to catch a glimpse of sadness behind the Warner Brother’s eyes. His big goofy smile faltered. The idea that Yakko was trying to hide something that was hurting him made Pinky’s tummy feel all tight, but not in a good way. But Pinky was determined to alleviate the teen’s woes. 

“Is something wrong, Yakko?” The tall mouse asked concernedly. 

Yakko gave a surprised expression before shrugging it off. “Oh, it’s nothing,” The teen replied, trying to sound as casual as possible. 

Pinky pondered for a moment. He took his paw and rubbed the bottom of his chin as he thought, but snapped his fingers as he figured it out. “Well, I don’t know how to get rid of the nothing that’s bothering you, but I’m sure that the movie might take your mind off of it. Narf!” He explained optimistically. 

Yakko looked at the mouse who took his problems quite literally and shook his head. 

“No no no,” The oldest Warner dismissed while waving his arms. He looked back at Pinky, who cocked his head sideways and stared back at him with concern pooling from his blue eyes. There was something in the mouse’s eyes that compelled Yakko to tell the truth. “Well, it’s just that it feels wrong to go to the movies without Dot, ya know?” He confessed. 

Pinky and Wakko gazed concernedly at Yakko, who continued to speak up. “I mean, who else am I gonna share my tray of nachos with?” 

Wakko wordlessly raised their hand, but Yakko stared at them with skeptical eyes and crossed his arms. “Wakko, you’ll just consume the entire tray.” He interjected with a deadpan expression. 

“Yeah, you’re probably right...” Wakko glumly admitted as he lowered their hand. 

“And I don’t feel like I should be watching a movie when I should be back at the hotel taking care of my little sis.” The eldest Warner mentioned. 

Pinky’s eyes widened. “So that's what Yakko was worried about!” He pondered to himself. Even though Dot’s absence was sorely felt by the three of them, it wasn’t the end of the world because Brain was currently tending to her every need. The lanky mouse knew how to comfort Yakko. 

“We all miss Dot, but you don’t have to worry because Brain’s taking great care of her!” Pinky reminded him with a reassuring smile. “And I would know since he always takes great care of me!”

“He does?” Wakko asked curiously, tilting his head like an adorable puppy. 

“Of course! Brain always makes me thimbles of nice hot tea whenever I get sick and patches me up whenever I get the owies after a failed plan to take over the world! Zort!” The mouse confidently explained. “And if Brain can take great care of me, he’ll take great care of Dot!” 

Wakko believed in Pinky’s word. While he felt bad for Dot, he knew that their sister was in good hands. The middle child turned to face their older brother. “See, Dot’s gonna be fine!” He emphasized. “And besides, she commanded you to have fun just before we left the hotel room!” 

“Yeah, I know…” Yakko muttered, rubbing the back of his head. 

“Don’t you trust Brain?” Pinky softly inquired. 

Yakko was surprised by the mouse’s question. “Of course I do! I wasn’t implying that I didn’t. It’s just…” The eldest Warner stared at Pinky, whose blue eyes seemed to pierce his very soul, prompting him to demolish the barriers he built around his emotions. “Well, it’s really hard to ignore my big brother instincts, ya know?” He finally confessed. “Not to mention how weird it is to have someone else do my job.” 

Wakko walked over to their older brother and gave him a sympathetic pat on the back. “But Pinky and The Brain have been taking care of us all weekend! They take us out for food, tell us bedtime stories, and give us goodnight kisses,” He reminded their older brother, with Pinky silently nodding. “They’re our dads, remember?” 

“Dads?” Yakko quizzically repeated with a surprised look on his face.

Wakko’s face contorted into a worrisome frown. He thought that Yakko would already be on board with the mice becoming their parents, but apparently, that was not the case. “Well yeah. 

Didn’t you hear me say ‘goodnight mouse dads’ last night?”

“No, he was fast asleep when you said that,” Pinky told the middle child. 

Yakko stared at his sibling with a befuddled expression. In any other circumstance, Wakko would only use the words like ‘dad’ or ‘dadoo’ when he was messing with their special friend of the week. But there was an undeniable sincerity in Wakko’s voice when he referred to the mice as their parents. And considering how well the rodents have been taking care of them, the thought of them being parents was a nice idea. Pinky would always dote on him and his siblings and be incredibly supportive of them. Plus having constant praise and validation from the silly mouse is exactly what Yakko needed to combat his anxiety and self-worth issues. And despite his grumpiness and stern nature, Brain proved to be an excellent caretaker. The big-headed mouse was incredibly protective of him and his siblings and even humored them by indulging in their childish requests. Both mice were a pleasure to be around and they were decent guardians who looked out for them and deeply cared about them. They seemed like the perfect parents to have. 

But Yakko felt his big brother instincts and anxiety nagging at him. He was taking good care of his sibs for decades without any intervention from any adults from the outside world. He was the sole caretaker of his siblings when the human adults at the Warner Bros. Studio thought they were too dangerous to be allowed in society and locked them away in the water tower like dogs at the pound. Even though Yakko admittedly believed that he could have benefitted from positive adult figures during those years in captivity, he managed to pull it off on his own. Taking care of his sibs was one of the things he was great at!

Now that Wakko adopted Pinky and Brain as their dads, Yakko feared that the mice would usurp his role as caretaker and would be rendered useless. What kind of big brother would he be if his role of nurturing provider, the one job he took the most pride in, was taken from him? 

“Come on Wakko, don’t be ridiculous. You can’t just start referring to our friends as our parents.” Yakko scoffed as he circled his right hand in the air. 

But Wakko took offense to their brother’s statement. “What’s his deal?” He thought as he gritted their teeth and flashed their fangs. 

Wakko felt their eyes start to water as he curled their hands into fists and stomped on the ground. “Is that any way to talk to your dad!” Wakko shouted, gesturing towards Pinky.

Yakko was taken aback when he saw the tears forming in the corners of Wakko’s eyes. He didn’t mean to hurt their feelings. “Wakko-” 

But before he could say anything else, Pinky interceded when he hopped down from Wakko’s hat and stood between the siblings. “Stop the fighting, please!” He pleaded with his watery blue eyes. “My heart breaks at the sight of sibling rivalries!” 

Yakko looked at the buck-toothed mouse, overwhelmed with guilt. They were supposed to be having a fun time at the movies on Dot’s behalf, but the only things he accomplished were quarreling with Wakko and making Pinky cry. “Well, this is just great,” 

The eldest Warner released a heavy sigh, shoved his hands in his pocket, and walked away from his sibling and mousey guardian. He slumped onto the bench and placed his head in his hands. Taking deep breaths, he dwelled over the scuffle. Sure he would eventually patch things up with Wakko, but he thought about Pinky. That poor innocent bundle of joy who loved almost everyone and everything in this world. And he made the little guy cry his little heart out. Yakko assumed that it would take a while longer for the mouse to forgive him after what he did. 

“Poit!” Pinky softly spoke up. “Do you wanna talk about it?” 

Yakko lifted his head to find Pinky sitting on Wakko’s red hat. The two looked at him with worried expressions on their faces. Perhaps now was the time to set things right. 

Yakko thought about what he wanted to say, took a deep breath, and exhaled. “I’m sorry for hurting your feelings, fellas.” He ruefully apologized. He took a moment to gather his courage before confessing one of his biggest fears. “It’s just that...well, I’m used to taking care of my sibs.” 

Wakko wordlessly nodded in understanding. He remembered all the times Yakko took great strides to make sure he and Dot were provided for when they were stuck in the water tower and afterward. Making them meals, entertaining them with his jokes, schooling them with his educational songs, and telling stories before bedtime. Wakko knew that Yakko took a lot of pride in his role as the responsible eldest sibling. 

Yakko looked at his sibling and the tall mouse as he continued to speak. “And while I trust Brain to watch over Dot, I never had anyone else take care of her in my place before. And I can’t help but feel so…” He struggled to get the word out from his throat, but managed to let out a defeated sigh.

“useless…” 

Wakko stared at their brother with somber eyes. He could relate to feeling left out. Especially since his U.S. Capital's Song or The Great Wakkorotti didn’t stack up against Yakko’s Nations of the World or Dot’s Poetry Corner. The last thing he wanted was for their older brother to feel the same way. 

“Now that’s just not true,” He thought determinedly. Yakko was many things: funny, talkative, boisterous, clever, sometimes annoying, charismatic, and musically-inclined. But never in all of his years did Wakko describe their older brother as useless. Far from it! Yakko simply needed to be reminded of how important he was. 

Wakko sprinted over to Yakko and catapulted himself onto the bench. With open arms, he gave their brother the biggest hug possible. Yakko felt his eyes start to water as he was immersed in his sibling’s warm and affectionate embrace. 

“You’re not useless, big brother,” The middle child assured as he gently rubbed their right hand up and down their brother’s back. “You’re one of the best people I know!”

Yakko blinked away the tears as he heard his sibling’s adamant praise. 

“And besides, who else can come up with catchy songs about the universe or multiplication?” Wakko added with a playful smile. 

Yakko let out a hearty chuckle. Touched by Wakko’s sincerity, he wrapped his arms around his sibling, pulling them close. “Aw, thanks baby sib.” 

“Anytime, bro,” Wakko replied, giving him a couple of pats on the back. 

Pinky was still perched on Wakko’s hat, watching the loving moment play out through tearful eyes. Their reconciliation played out just like those Hallmark Movie Channel films where the leads made up after their third-act breakup and gave each other warm hugs. But instead of conventionally attractive white couples, it was two toon siblings who fiercely loved in that strong familial way, which was a hundred times better! Oh, how he loved seeing family members make amends! 

When the siblings slowly released themselves from the hug, Pinky hopped down and went over to Yakko’s knee to let him know just how special he was. “Feeling better, love?” The mouse kindly inquired while gently patting his knee. 

Yakko looked at Pinky, who was comforting him like a parent soothing their child. The eldest Warner focused on the mouse’s soft blue eyes. There was not a single trace of malice or anger to be found. Only pure, unconditional love radiated from those eyes. 

After spending decades locked away in the water tower and ignored by the workers in the studio lot, all Yakko ever wanted was attention. He craved any type of reaction from other people, whether it be good or bad. He could make people laugh or irritate them past their limits. Just as long as he received some sort of response, he was content. But as Yakko continued to stare into Pinky’s gentle eyes, he was reminded that the best type of attention was love. Not the romantic type or the adoration from viewers, but familial love. Yakko forged a strong brotherly affection for Wakko and Dot, who equally loved their big bro. Perhaps, he was willing to allow Pinky, and even Brain, to love him and his siblings like the good parents they set themselves up to be. 

“Yeah, I’m feeling better now,” He assured the mouse. But there was something else nagging at him that he wanted to address. “But there’s something I gotta ask you, Pinky. Do you see yourself as our dad?”

Pinky did not hesitate to answer. “I do, but I could be your mum if that makes you more comfortable!” 

Yakko softly chuckled. “I really appreciate you looking out for us, but I need some time to really think about this.” 

Pinky gave the teen a gentle smile as he patted his knee once more. “Poit! That’s alright, take all the time that you need.” 

With a sigh of relief, Yakko was grateful that Pinky didn’t try to rush things through and respected his feelings. If the rest of the weekend went by this smoothly, maybe he would have no issue with referring to the mice as his new dads. 

Wakko looked at the two and decided to change the subject. “You know what, I don’t feel like going to the movies either.” 

Yakko was surprised by what he just heard. “You don’t?”

“Sure! If you don’t wanna go to the movies, then neither do I.” He affirmed. 

“Are you sure?” Yakko asked. He didn’t want to make Wakko feel like he had to make a sacrifice for his sake. 

Wakko gave a confident nod. “We can always go to the movies some other time.” He insisted. “And as a middle child, I’m used to making compromises.” 

The eldest Warner was relieved by his sibling’s astute answer and playfully ruffled their red cap. But with the movies now crossed off their planned schedule, he was uncertain of what he, Wakko, and Pinky should do to pass the time. “Now the only question left is what ways could we have fun outside of the hotel room?” Yakko pondered aloud. He brought himself into a thinking pose, propping his elbow onto his arm which was draped across his lap, and scratching his chin. Wakko sat down next to their brother and immediately copied his pose. 

Pinky pondered as well. Deep in his thoughts, he looked at Yakko and Wakko, who fused into a rocket ship and opened up the ship’s hatch. Pinky immediately hopped inside to find Yakko and Wakko dressed in Star Trek uniforms. The lanky mouse looked down to find himself wearing a fetching red dress uniform from the original series. Yakko pressed a red button and they blasted off the bench and zoomed through the city skyline. Inside the ship, Pinky noticed a big sack full of toys and goodies. The ship crashed through a window, landing in the hotel room. Dot was dressed in an elegant nightgown and a purple fluffy boa draped over her shoulders while Brain, who now had long blonde hair, was dressed in a buttoned-down white satin shirt and black leather pants. The chubby mouse bit on a red rose as he read his book on world history. Dot and Brain were shocked by the sight of the rocket ship. The hatch opened, and the giant bag was pushed through the door and landed in the middle of the room. Yakko, Wakko, and Pinky emerged from the spacecraft and opened up the sack full of goodies. The Warners played with the various toys and games while Brain seductively winked at Pinky and tossed the rose. Pinky managed to catch it with his tail and blushed at his partner’s romantic gesture. Brain immediately wrapped his arm around Pinky’s waist and pulled him in for a sweeping kiss. 

Pinky sighed as he was brought back to the real world. He had the most splendid idea and he couldn’t wait to share it with the Warners. 

“Who says that we could only have fun outside?” The lanky mouse asked. 

Wakko gave the mouse an incredulous look. “What do you mean?” 

“Maybe we could bring all the fun inside the hotel room instead!” Pinky exclaimed. 

Yakko and Wakko thought this through and grinned at the suggestion of bringing the fun back to the hotel room and including Dot and Brain in their activities. After all, she only wanted Yakko and Wakko to have fun but didn’t specify where they could have fun. 

“That’s brilliant Pinky!” Yakko complimented. “Maybe we could do some fun arts and crafts projects!” 

“Or play board games! And buy lots of snacks!” Wakko eagerly added. 

“Or purple: all of the above!” Pinky cheered. 

The three of them bounced off of the bench, excited to bring some much-needed fun to Dot and Brain. Pinky tugged at Wakko’s sweater sleeve, prompting the middle child to place the mouse back on top of their cap. 

“We could go to the mall and purchase some supplies for today’s activities!” Pinky explained as he pulled out the gold credit card from his pocket. 

“Well let’s hop to it!” Yakko declared. He broke off into a sprint, with Wakko running on all fours to keep up with their brother’s pace. Pinky laughed joyfully as he held onto the middle child’s red hat. 

-                  -                   -                       -                       - 

Back in the hotel room, Brain was silently reading Heidi while Dot was fast asleep in the other bed. The smaller mouse took another glimpse at the snoozing Warner sister. He had to admit that she was quite adorable. Hopefully, the girl would be on the mend by the time she woke up.

The small mouse let out a blissful sigh. After dealing with the hectic antics of the boisterous Warner siblings, it was nice to have a moment of peace and quiet. Perhaps this was the perfect opportunity to develop a brilliant plan for world domination! 

Brain closed his book and quickly retrieved his journal and pens from his pocket. He was determined to devise a fool-proof scheme just in case his previously crafted giant robot plan backfired. Now the question was what could he do? Cradling the pen in his hands, he began to ponder the many ways he could ascend to power. 

Create a mind-control app? Start a pop culture-themed podcast and send out subliminal messages during the ad-breaks? Start a TikTok trend that encourages participants to obey him? Blackmail Elon Musk? Promote an enticing convention and swindle money from con attendees? Stage an elaborate heist in the Mar-a-Lago Club? Build a drone to harass the politicians in Washington D.C.? 

Oh, the possibilities were endless!

But his ears twitched upwards when he heard the door open. Pinky, Yakko, and Wakko returned to the hotel room, each carrying multiple bulk plastic bags filled with who knows what. As the three entered, Brain immediately shushed them, placing his index finger close to his mouth. Once he got their attention, he gestured towards Dot. 

“Right-o!” Pinky whispered, giving his partner a thumbs up. Yakko and Wakko immediately did what they were told and tip-toed quietly into the room. 

Yakko looked over at his sister, slept serenely in bed. He was quick to notice her chest rising and falling with each breath she took. Overcome with relief, the eldest Warner smiled. Dot was okay. 

He looked over at Brain, who was putting away his novel and felt a pang of guilt for doubting him. 

“Hey Brain,” Yakko addressed the big-headed mouse. “Thanks for watching over Dot.” 

Brain smiled at the Warner brother. “You’re welcome.” He said. “And judging from your text, it’s quite obvious how lucky she is to have older siblings who love her dearly.” 

Yakko smiled back, feeling touched by the praise. Wakko carefully patted his back. 

“Hi, Dadoo!” Wakko happily greeted Brain. 

The smaller mouse tilted his head in confusion at first. But then he remembered Wakko referring to him and Pinky as their dads last night and assumed that dadoo was just a unique term of endearment. “Greetings Wakko.” Brain replied with a small wave. “So how was the movie?”

“Oh, we didn’t go to the movies,” Wakko answered.

“You didn’t?” Brain inquired. “Then where pray tell, did you three go?” 

“We just came back from the mall,” Pinky reported. “Yakko and Wakko came up with these fun ideas of activities we could do instead, so we all decided to have a fun-fun, silly-willy day in the hotel room!”

“We figured that we’ll take it easy for today,” Yakko said. 

Yakko and Wakko took out some of the contents from the bags, such as materials for arts and crafts, Jenga, Connect Four, and Chutes and Ladders. Pinky also took out a few items from the bag. 

Pinky brought a few packages for Brain. “Here, I bought these just for you. Troz!” 

Brain opened up the bag to find over a dozen packages of doll clothes. The mouse marveled at various suit jackets, coats, sweaters, pants, and royal outfits Pinky purchased for him. His beau remembered his fashion preferences and he couldn’t help but smile. 

“I remembered what you said about making as many extrapolate purchases as possible. So that’s what I did!” The taller mouse explained. 

Brain was so flattered by Pinky’s memory that he didn’t even bother to correct his poor vocabulary.  “Why Pinky, I’m touched by this kind gesture.” He said graciously. 

“Aww Brain,” Pinky cooed. 

“I’m going to get started on my next graphic novel!” Wakko declared as he took out one of their library books from the book bag. 

Yakko also retrieved his book on European architecture from the bag and sat cross-legged on the ground. He took one of the bags and dumped out its contents. Packages of popsicle sticks and various bottles of glue sprawled across the floor. The teen opened up the package and carefully took out the popsicle sticks and began assembling his latest crafts project.

Brain couldn’t help but notice the eldest Warner’s determined look as he began gluing the popsicle sticks in a large circle while using his library book as a reference. The mouse was fascinated by this development and walked over to the teen. “So, uh what are you up to?” The pudgy mouse politely asked. 

“Oh, I’m building a popsicle stick model of The Basilica of the Sacred Heart of Paris.” Yakko casually explained. “I read about it in my library book on European architecture.” 

“Ah, le Sacré-Coeur de Montmartre.” Brain blissfully sighed. The mouse was impressed with the oldest Warner’s excitement for recreating the iconic church. “Would you like any assistance?”

“Sure!” Yakko answered enthusiastically. 

The mouse was pleased with the thought of being included in a wholesome crafts project. Brain took out a few popsicle sticks and collaborated with the Warner brother in companionable silence. 

As they built their model cathedral constructed from popsicle sticks, Yakko continued to muse over the idea of the mice becoming new additions to their little family. Pinky constantly doting on them, showering them with praise and gifts. 

Brain, on the other hand, was a grump who could be stern at times but was ultimately a softie who had their best interests in mind. Yakko loved to tease the serious mouse whenever he had the opportunity, but he also loved to share his educational pursuits with him, knowing that the intellectual would appreciate it. 

He also took Pinky and Brain’s short stature into consideration. Since they were small mice, Yakko and his sibs could cause as much chaos as possible and they would have some challenges keeping up with their silly antics. 

There was a lot of untapped potential in allowing the rodents into their everyday lives, and Yakko couldn’t help but ponder the possibilities. 

But the teen lost his train of thought when he heard a soft mumbling from the bed. Wakko, Pinky, and Brain also stopped what they were doing and turned their attention towards Dot, who roused from her sleep. Stretching her arms, the Warner sister fluttered her eyes and slowly got up into a sitting position on the bed. 

Yakko was the first to notice his sister getting up and smiled. “Great to have you back, Lazarus.” He joked. Dot couldn’t help but snicker at her brother’s quip. Yakko decided to ask a more serious question. “You feeling better sis?” 

“Yeah.” She answered. “How long was I asleep?” 

“About a couple of weeks, give or take,” Pinky answered with a shrug. 

“Pinky!” Brain berated his partner. He then turned his attention to the girl. “You’ve been asleep for a couple of hours.” 

Dot nodded as she carefully adjusted to a sitting position on the bed. “Thanks for helping me, Brain.”

The smaller mouse smiled humbly. “You’re welcome.” 

“Oh Dot, I’ve got you something from the store!” Pinky crowed. He sprinted towards one of the bags and took out a plastic box containing a family of Calico Critters. Lifting the package over his head, he raced to the girl’s bedside. 

Dot’s eyes twinkled as she eagerly took the package. She inspected the small bunny family dressed in their finest countryside attire. While Dot prided herself on being an intelligent young woman, she didn’t have it in her to hide away her interests in soft toys and plushies. 

“Oh thank you Pinky! You’re the best!” She exclaimed as she scooped Pinky up and nuzzled her cheek against his face. 

The smaller mouse laughed and let out a “Troz!” as he was smothered with affection. 

Wakko contentedly sighed as he closed the graphic novel. The middle child got up to place the book back into the book bag. “I should get back to work on my latest artistic masterpiece!” He declared as he rummaged through their pocket. But the drawing wasn’t there. 

He rushed over to the book bag and dumped out all the books, hoping that their drawing would fly out. Only a dozen books plummeted onto the floor. Wakko scrambled through the library books in search of their precious illustration but to no avail. 

Yakko and Brain paused their popsicle stick construction when they noticed a distressed Wakko desperately looking for something important. 

“What’s wrong, Wakko?” Yakko asked concernedly. 

“My drawing!” Wakko warbled as tears started pouring down their cheeks. “I must have left it back at the library!” 

Brain got up and carefully approached the worried Warner sibling. “Now now, it’s not the end of the world, Wakko. You can make another drawing here.” He soothed. Providing words of comfort wasn’t one of his strong suits, but he was trying his best. 

“But it’s very important to me!” The middle child trembled as the waterfall of tears continued to fall. 

Brain felt something stirring deep inside him. Seeing Wakko reduced to tears over his missing illustration brought up the painful memory of Pinky sobbing uncontrollably when he forgot to send his letter to Santa. The mouse learned not to brush aside Pinky’s own wants as trivial and he would not do the same for the middle Warner sibling. 

With his tiny pink paws, Brain gently patted the child’s foot. “Dry your tears Wakko, we’ll retrieve your picture from the library before closing time.” 

“You will?” Wakko grinned at the mouse despite the tears that streaked their face. Brain replied with a confident nod. 

The smaller mouse retrieved his smartphone from his pocket and tapped his Google app. He typed the name of the library in the search bar and hit the magnifying glass button. He immediately found the results and looked over at the library information on the right-hand side, searching for the weekend hours of availability. The library closes at 5:00 PM. He looked over at the time on the top left-hand corner of the phone. It was now 4:45 PM. 

Brain looked over at Wakko with sheer determination. “Come along, Wakko. We’ll make it to the library faster if we take my human suit.” 

The chubby mouse sprinted over towards his robot, swiftly climbed up the suit, and hopped inside the driver’s seat. Yanking the control levers, he swiftly grabbed Wakko and made their way out of the hotel room. The mouse ran over to the elevator and saw the doors about to close. Brain managed to place his foot on the divider, stopping the doors from closing. Once he got inside, Brain pressed the rooftop button. 

“But aren’t we going to the library?” Wakko asked worriedly. 

“We are Wakko, we won’t be walking or taking a cab.” Brain answered with fierce determination. 

“But I will promise you that we will arrive at the library before closing time.” He guaranteed. 

Once the elevator doors opened, Brain began to sprint towards the center of the rooftop patio. “Hold on to your hat!” He commanded, and the middle child firmly guarded their red cap with one hand. 

Pressing the red button in the controls, Brain ignited the jet-powered boosters on his shoes and he took off from the rooftop and ascended above the hotel. Brain carefully steered the controls as he flew across the city skyline, careful to keep Wakko secure in his arms. 

Wakko kept a strong grip over their hat as their eyes wandered down to the ground. He looked over to The Brain, who kept a determined stare as he searched for the public library. Wakko stuck out their tongue and let out an enthusiastic cheer. 

“Wooooo!!!” Wakko joyfully shouted. Many onlookers in the city streets turned their attention to the strange robotic suit carrying the eager toon. Not the most unusual thing spotted in Los Angeles on a Saturday afternoon. 

Brain spotted the library gardens and swiftly descended towards his destination. Jerking the controls, Brain landed near the library entrance in a superhero pose. Wakko released himself from Brain’s hold and ran into the library. 

Upon remembering the no-running policy, Wakko sped-walked over to the children’s section. Once he burst through the entrance of the kid-friendly area, Wakko picked up the pace. He spotted the drawing tables but was sullen to find them bare, save for the box of colored pencils. 

“Oh no!” Wakko gasped. Someone must have stolen his artwork! While he didn’t have the same detective skills as Hercule Yakko, he was determined to get to the bottom of this!

“Can I help you?” A kind voice asked. Wakko turned around to find the nice librarian he met this morning. Maybe she can help him solve the case!

“Excuse me Miss Librarian, I left my important drawing on the table earlier, and now it’s gone!” Wakko nervously explained while rocking on their heels in anticipation. 

The librarian sympathetically looked at the child before remembering. “Oh, that’s because I saved it!” 

“Really!?” Wakko exclaimed. 

“Yep,” The librarian confirmed as she opened up the drawer and took out the illustration. “Normally we recycle any pictures that are left behind, but I thought that this picture was too good to be tossed out. Plus I figured that you and your family would have come back for it anyway.” 

The librarian gave the picture back to Wakko, who quickly retrieved it. The middle child gazed at the drawing with tears of joy. 

“Reunited and it feels so good!” He cheered while clutching the picture to their chest. “Thank you very much, Miss Librarian!” 

“Your welcome.” The librarian kindly replied. 

Wakko waved at her as he made their bouncy exit from the children’s section. By the time he exited the children’s section, he found Brain awkwardly waiting by the circulation desk. 

“Found it!” He proclaimed as he showed the mouse the back of the picture. 

“That’s wonderful.” Brain sighed in relief. “May I see your illustration?”

“I’m not finished with my drawing yet. But I promise I’ll show you when it’s done.” Wakko said as he stuffed the picture in their shirt. “Scout’s honor!” 

“Very well. Let’s make our way back to the hotel.” Brain said as he held Wakko’s hand. Once the two made their way out of the library, Wakko tugged at the robotic arm hard enough to gain Brain’s attention. 

“Hey Dadoo, can we fly again?” Wakko eagerly asked, bouncing up and down. 

“I would prefer if we walked.” Brain answered hesitantly. 

“Awww,” Wakko groaned in defeat. 

“Come now, walking has its benefits.” Brain reassured the middle child, but they still looked down at the sidewalk, kicking a stone pebble out of frustration. The mouse furrowed his brow as he pondered. Certainly, the best way to please Wakko was to please their appetite. 

Brain gently squeezed Wakko’s hand, causing the Warner sibling to look up at the big-headed mouse. “I know of a wonderful designer donut shop where we can pick up two boxes of confectioneries to share with the others.” 

Wakko’s eyes widened with joy, eager to visit his favorite donut shop once again. “Yay!” The middle child chirped before leaping into Brain’s arms. The mouse was caught unaware by Wakko’s sudden gesture of love but welcomed it nonetheless. 

-              -                    -                       -                      -

Back at the hotel room, Yakko, Dot, and Pinky were playing an intense game of Jenga. Pinky inspected the unsteady tower, searching for the perfect block to remove. The mouse found a loose piece. He yanked it out in one swift motion, but the tower soon collapsed on him. 

Dot put a hand over her mouth as she saw the poor mouse toppled by the Jenga blocks. Yakko couldn’t help but laugh at the tower’s sudden destruction, but the Warner sister swiftly elbowed him. 

Fortunately, Pinky popped out of the pile with a hearty laugh. “Oh, that was so much fun! Narf!” 

“Let’s play another round!” Yakko declared as he gathered a handful of Jenga blocks. He began to assemble the tower when the door clicked open. He, Dot and Pinky turned their heads to see Brain entering the room, carrying Wakko in one arm (whose face was covered with strawberry frosting and rainbow sprinkles) and two boxes of donuts in the other. 

“Hi fellas!” Wakko greeted with a wave. 

“Hey, Wakko!” Dot called back. The middle child was relieved to know that their little sister looked much healthier and seemed to be on the mend. 

“Did you find your drawing?” Yakko asked his sibling. “Yup!” Wakko cheered as he jumped out of Brain’s grasp and onto the floor. “And we also found donuts!” He swiftly took the two boxes and opened one of them, showcasing eleven donuts. 

Pinky trotted over to the box and gazed at the many different flavors. “I’ve never seen so many donuts like this in my life!”

“Oh, they’re the best!” Wakko exclaimed as he was about to list off the various donuts. “There’s brie, white cheddar, chicken noodle soup, buffalo chicken, seafood salad, avocado, macaroon, bacon, ranch dressing, and macaroni and cheese!”

“Ooh, so many choices! Zort!” Pinky exclaimed. “But I’ll have the macaroni and cheese donut please!” Wakko happily handed the donut over to Pinky who eagerly accepted the unusual treat. 

Brain retrieved a handful of napkins from his suit pocket and offered them to the group. “Now let’s save the hotel cleaning staff the trouble and avoid making a colossal mess.” 

“Okay Brain!” Pinky replied as he took a napkin. Yakko, Wakko, and Dot quickly grabbed some napkins from the robotic hand before grabbing their donuts of choice. 

The chubby mouse placed the last two napkins on his bed before exiting the robotic suit. After landing on the mattress, he walked over to the box of donuts to inspect the bizarre donut flavors. 

Before Wakko could eat his second donut, he noticed Brain having a difficult time selecting which flavor to indulge himself with. The middle child remembered how Brain offered his french fries the other night and decided to return the favor. He looked at their donut and split it in half. 

“Here Dadoo, have some of my mashed potatoes with butter and gravy donut!” Wakko eagerly offered. 

“That’s awfully kind of you Wakko, but I’m all set.” Brain declined. “I think I’ll have the brie donut instead.” 

“Okay, suit yourself!” Wakko concluded. He threw the two halves of his donut in the air and caught them in their mouth. Wakko hummed contentedly as he felt the mashed potato, butter, and gravy melt in their mouth before swallowing. 

“So Brain, what’s the dinner situation like?” Dot inquired as she cautiously took a small bit from her donut, careful about not upsetting her stomach again. 

Brain pondered for a moment. Dot’s sudden illness threw a wrench in his plans to take the kids out to a fancy restaurant, throwing away another chance at having an elegant dining experience over the weekend while he could pay for it. But Brain was never one to dwell in defeat. He couldn’t change what he can’t control, but he could always adapt. 

“Is anyone in the mood for room service?” Brain asked the group. 

“Now we’re talking!” Yakko exclaimed. 

The mouse hopped over to the nightstand and took out the pamphlet regarding the hotel’s room service. After everyone informed him of what they wanted, Brain picked up the telephone, punched in the numbers, and requested a lengthy dinner order: meatloaf and side vegetables for Yakko, roast beef and chicken for Wako, chicken noodle soup and caesar salad for Dot, garlic jumbo prawns and filet mignon for himself and a heaping bowl of mashed potatoes and pudding snacks for Pinky. 

A half-hour later, their dinners arrived. The Warners sat down on the floor as they consumed their respective meals. Pinky dove into the potato as if it was a swimming pool. Brain was satisfied with his meal, thankful that the steamed carrots that came with his prawns were served al dente. 

After dinner, The Warners plopped back onto the bed rather exhausted after a long day. Dot took the remote control and turned on the television. She searched through the hotel’s selected movies in search of something decent to sit through. 

“The Sandlot was a bit of a let down in my opinion, so I’m gonna pick out tonight’s movie.” Dot drawled as she scanned through the various movie titles. 

After a minute of scrolling past some bland-looking movies, she came across an unusual-looking movie poster. A picture of Brain wearing a brown toupee standing in a dramatic pose with his eyes closed beneath the bold text of the title: A Beautiful Brain. 

Wakko and Dot ‘oohed’ and ‘awed’ at the screen. Yakko initially let out an amused snort but then he read that the movie was nominated for several Academy Awards, including Best Picture. A movie that was directed by and starred Brain somehow was in the running for Best Picture? 

The Warners were wildly curious about the fact that Brain of all people was involved in such a prestigious movie. 

“Okay, I have so many questions right now!” Yakko declared. “Were there no good movies out the year you made that movie?” 

“What made you want to direct?” Dot asked with genuine intrigue. 

“Can we watch this movie please?” Wakko begged. 

Brain waved his hands in the air. “Now, calm down.” He ordered with an indignant frown. “To answer your inquiries, yes I acted, directed, and produced this piece of critically acclaimed Oscar bait, and, as you children would suspect, it was all part of an elaborate plan to take over the world.” 

“By winning the hearts of critics and audiences everywhere?” Dot spoke up. 

“Unfortunately, that wasn’t the main objective of my plan.” 

“So what’s it about?” Wakko asked curiously with their tongue bouncing about. 

“A Beautiful Brain follows the story of a once-promising gifted student who grows up to be a weary and cynical college professor who learns that his value in life extends beyond what he could provide with his superior intellect.” Brain explained. 

“Oh, it’s such an emotional rush! I laughed, I cried, picked my nose when no one was looking!” Pinky eagerly added. “And it could have won Best Picture too, if it hadn’t been for…” The mouse’s smile contorted into a rueful frown as he remembered his blunder during his mission to secure Brain’s place as Best Picture winner so he could take over the world on Oscar night. “Me...”

Pinky tucked his legs in, wrapped his arms around his knees, and lowered his head on top of his kneecaps. Brain gave a sympathetic sigh and gently rubbed his partner’s back. “But all is well, dear Pinky.” 

“What happened?” Yakko inquired. 

“I was supposed to rig the ceremony by putting in Brain’s envelope in the winners’ pile, but I accidentally put in my no-bake cheesecake recipe in the envelope by mistake!” Pinky sadly recalled. 

“And had I been announced the winner, I would have used my immobilization ray to kidnap the entire audience of Hollywood elites and force them to do my bidding.” Brain finished as he continued to caress Pinky’s back in a soothing manner. “But it’s best not to dwell on past failures.” The pudgy mouse reminded his partner.

“Can we still watch the movie?” Wakko asked anxiously. 

The smaller mouse cringed at the question. Truthfully, he had not revisited the movie since it premiered in select theaters, and since they recounted their failed plan to the kids, he was not in the mood to watch his critically acclaimed vanity project. 

“No, you kids wouldn’t enjoy it.” Brain insisted. “It’s a dreadfully long movie with too many conversational scenes and not enough action to keep your attention.” 

“You’re right, that doesn’t sound very captivating at all,” Yakko remarked. 

“Yes,” Brain said dryly, brushing aside the eldest Warner’s quip. “In all honesty, the movie makes The English Patient look like Mad Max: Fury Road.” 

“Wait a minute, they made another of those movies?” Dot asked. Yakko and Wakko were equally surprised by this revelation. Apparently, they glossed over the most recent Mad Max movie in their Reboot It song. 

“You haven’t seen Mad Max: Fury Road !?” Pinky and Brain shouted simultaneously. The Warners wordlessly shook their heads in unison. The mice looked at each other and knew that this needed to be remedied. 

“Oh, it’s only one of the best movies in the history of history!” Pinky explained. “There are so many cars that go zoom-zoom-zoomie! Zort! And there’s a lot of emotional moments that make you feel all soft and gooshy!” 

“Fury Road is a cinematic masterpiece that works on so many levels!” Brain added. “Brilliant action set-pieces, a major focus on visual storytelling with biting commentary on the brutality of war, and a magnificent exploration of feminism.” 

“Feminism in my action movie!?” Dot gushed, her eyes gleaming with excitement. “Sign me up!” 

“Alright, let’s see if we can find this movie anywhere,” Yakko said as he scrolled through the various movie titles until he found a colorful movie poster featuring a woman with a shaved head and a man in the front seat of a car. 

“Oooh, so pretty,” Wakko awed. As he read the descriptor he noticed one huge obstacle. “Aw man, the movie is rated R...”

Brain hummed in response. “It appears that this movie is deemed inappropriate for children…” He drawled as he gazed at the Warners’ defeated expressions. But he laughed in response. “But we’re cool guardians, right Pinky?” 

“Amen to that!” Pinky cheerfully responded. 

“And if we’re going off by the date you were originally conceived in the Warner Brothers Animation Department, all three of you are technically over the age of seventeen and needn’t worry about this sort of issue.” Brain stated confidently. 

Yakko and Wakko bounced up and down the bed in elation, linking their arms and doing a do-si-do. Dot went over and hugged the mice. “Yes! I can’t believe you two are gonna let us watch the adult action movie!” 

“It would be a crime not to show this movie to you kids,” Brain chuckled. 

“Yes! Best dads ever!” She declared as she hugged them close, their cheeks squishing together. Pinky savored the affection while Brain was stunned by the sudden gesture. Once they broke away, Dot carefully cradled the mice in her hands. 

“But mark my words, I will watch your Oscar contender at some point, old man!” Dot added. 

“Yes, yes, certainly.” Brain waved his hand in dismissal. “But for now, let us indulge in this beautifully crafted piece of action cinema.” 

Dot gently carried the mice in her hands as she brought them over to the other bed. Yakko and Wakko landed on the bed and got into their movie-watching positions. 

During the movie, Brain was surprised to learn that the Warners remained relatively still when watching the movie. Although Wakko did get up from time to time to act out the thrilling action scenes. 

Brain was so invested in the movie that it took him a few minutes to realize that something soft and warm had wrapped around his broken, zig-zagged tail. He looked down to see Pinky’s tail intertwined with his. A gesture normally reserved for moments of intimate cuddling after a failed scheme to take over the world or a particularly grueling day of experiments at the lab. Regardless, Brain smiled at Pinky’s affectionate gesture. 

The pudgy mouse looked over at the Warners and his partner before releasing a contented sigh. Even though they weren’t able to go to the movie theater together, they still managed to watch a movie from the comfort of the hotel room. 

Once the credits rolled, the Warners applauded as Brain turned off the television set. Brain tried to get up but felt a sharp pain in his rear when he tried to move. He looked over at Pinky and noticed that their tails were still tangled together. 

The color of Brain’s cheeks and tail tinted to a light shade of pink. “Pinky!” He alerted his partner, gesturing to their tails. 

The taller mouse looked over at their tails and blushed at the sight of their intimate display. “Oh, sorry Brain,” Pinky replied with a sheepish smile. He slowly unraveled his tail, careful not to hurt his partner, and liberated his appendage. 

Brain was ready to give a reprimanding speech to Pinky about showcasing such lewd activity in front of the children but was alerted when he felt a gloved finger gently patting his large head. The mouse turned to see the Warner sister batting her eyes and endearing him to her cuteness. 

“Hey Brain, can you and Pinky tell us a story?” Dot asked. Wakko nodded enthusiastically with their tongue bouncing about. 

“We would be delighted to, wouldn’t we Pinky?” Brain answered as he slyly glanced at his partner. 

Pinky eagerly rushed over to his beau’s side, pulling him into a side hug. “We should tell the story of Rapunzel- no! We should act out the story of Rapunzel, Brain! With costumes and sets!” He suggested. The Warners were excited at the idea of the mice putting on a show for them. 

“Sounds like an ambitious endeavor, but with enough ingenuity, we can pull it off.” Brain concurred. “Now, we just need to obtain materials for the set, some costumes, and a long wig for Rapunzel’s hair.” 

“I’ve got some pieces of cardboard from the crafts store,” Yakko stated, pointing over to the small pile of art materials. 

“Excellent!” Brain said with a confident grin. 

“I have some Calico Critter clothes that would fit you both.” Dot added. 

“Wonderful!” Pinky exclaimed, clasping his hands together. 

“I’ve got some pisghetti for Rapunzel’s hair!” Wakko declared. He reached into their hammerspace and retrieved a handful of long, moist strands of thin spaghetti, which was covered with small specks of black fur. 

Brain stared at the spaghetti and back at the middle child. “Wakko, I am both amazed and disgusted by your creativity.” The smaller mouse remarked. Wakko grinned at the unusual compliment. 

“Now, Pinky and I need approximately fifteen minutes to prepare for our low-budget stage production of Rapunzel. So I suggest that you three get ready for bed.” 

The Warners saluted the mice and immediately began their bedtime routine of changing into their pajamas and brushing their teeth. 

The mice were quick to construct an elaborate set made entirely out of cardboard, don their wardrobes, come up with a script on the fly and memorize said script and all the musical numbers. Pinky was excited to play the role of Rapunzel. The mouse wore a lavender dress and fashioned the spaghetti into a braided blonde wig. Brain decided to play the leading man, wearing a teal vest, a white undershirt, and black pants, and his brown toupee (the same toupee he wore when he taught high school under his Mr. Brainslowski alias and when he acted in A Beautiful Brain). 

The Warners emerged from the bathroom in their pajamas. Yakko had a grey T-Shirt with the Warner Bros. logo and red flannel pajama pants. Wakko wore a hockey jersey and a blue bathrobe. Dot a purple nightshirt and matching pajama pants. The siblings were surprised to see a small set on the foot of their bed and the mice already dressed in their respective costumes. 

“So, you guys have everything all set?” Yakko asked. 

Pinky eagerly nodded. “I’m so excited to play the role of Rapunzel!” He declared as he twirled around. 

“And I’m equally excited to play the role of Finn Glider! The charming rogue and Rapunzel’s love interest.” Brain explained dramatically as he struck a dynamic pose. 

Yakko raised his hand in objection. “Uuuuuhhh, but isn’t his name Flynn Ri-” 

“Ah ah ah!” Brain interrupted with a pointed finger. “We don’t want the mouse to sue, now do we?”

“But Brain, why on earth would I want to sue you?” Pinky questioned as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Brain rolled his eyes and he took Pinky’s hand. “Let’s get this show on the road, shall we?” He told his partner as he tugged him by his hand, retreating behind the curtains of their makeshift stage and turned off the lights. 

Moments later, a small puppeteer’s box emerged from the curtains, with a small dim light behind the screen. The mice picked up their shadow puppet props as Brain’s booming voice provided the expository information in the prologue. 

“Once upon a time in a faraway kingdom there lived a beautiful princess. But the poor girl was kidnapped at a young age by an awful hag. The poor girl, whom the hag named Rapunzel, lived in solitude in an abandoned tower in the woods. Each day, she stared out at the world from her tower window, longing for companionship…” 

The lights behind the small screen blew out. The puppeteer’s box was wheeled away to the left and the curtains pulled back to reveal a painted forest background and a cardboard tower. So far the Warners were impressed with the mice’s creativity and were immediately invested in the play. 

Pinky strutted onto the stage, but Brain quickly yanked him back. “You have to open up the tower window, you imbecile!” Brain reprimanded in a hushed voice. 

“Oh, sorry Brain!” Pinky whispered back. The Warners suppressed their laughter as the mice dealt with their theatrical screw-up. 

The cardboard shutters to the cardboard tower flew open and Pinky popped his head out with a radiant smile on his face. 

“Oh, what a lovely morning it is outside! Narf!” He spoke in a somewhat monotone voice. He looked down to refer to his script and continued on. “The animals are having such a fun-fun silly-willy time outside, and yet I am alone in my tower. Oh, how I wish I had someone to talk to.” 

At that moment, Brain waltzed onto the stage and stood in a dramatic pose. 

Pinky smiled and waved at his co-star. “Greetings, fair person!” He exclaimed. “And what might your name be?” 

Brain looked up at the tower and tossed back his toupee. “It is I, Finn Glider! Notorious outlaw, cunning rogue, and certified ladies’ man!” The mouse flashed a smarmy grin at his audience. 

Yakko and Dot stifled their giggles. 

Wakko, on the other hand, was frightened at the sight of Brain baring his teeth and pulled their hat downward to shield their eyes. “You guys didn’t tell me that this was a scary story!” He wailed. 

After giving a smug smile, he turned his attention back to Pinky and approached the cardboard tower. “And who might you be fair maiden?” He inquired. “I could only hope your name is as beautiful as your face!” 

“My name is Pinky- I mean, Rapunzel! Zort!” Pinky faltered. 

“Nice save,” Brain muttered sarcastically. 

“Thank you, Brain.” Pinky kindly replied whilst batting his eyes. The mouse glanced back at the script in his hands and focused on his performance. “So Finn, would you like to drop by for a spot of tea?” 

“That sounds lovely, fair Rapunzel.” Brain eagerly responded. He looked to the tower and his smile turned into a forlorn frown. “But alas, I have no way to access the tower.” 

“Not to worry, Finn. For I could let down my hair for you to climb up the tower!” Pinky crowed. 

Brain knelt down and extended his arm out to Pinky. “Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your long hair!” 

The taller mouse gathered the braided spaghetti wig, which proved to be much heavier than he anticipated. But nevertheless, he happily dropped the pasta wig, which crash-landed on top of Brain. The Warners laughed at the sudden slapstick comedy while the chubby mouse let out an exasperated sigh. 

“Glad to know you kids are enjoying yourselves…” Brain soured. 

Once he got up, he climbed up the spaghetti wig. However, this proved to be a challenge, for the pasta was surprisingly slippery after staying in Wakko’s pocket for an uncertain amount of time. Upon reaching the top of the tower, Pinky pulled him through the window and the curtains closed, ending the scene. 

For the next half hour, the mice continued to perform their rendition of Rapunzel, and the Warners were enchanted throughout the play. In the final scene, the two mice sat in a boat made from a used toilet paper roll cylinder, singing a passionate duet about finding the light and falling in love. Once Pinky and Brain completed their song, they leaned in for a kiss and the curtains closed. 

The children stood up and applauded. The mice emerged from the curtains to see their enthusiastic audience. Pinky and Brain exchanged loving glances, proud that they were able to pull off a play in a short amount of time and with limited resources. Clasping their paws together, the mice bowed. 

“Oh man, that was a riot!” Yakko cheered. 

“Two thumbs way up!” Dot agreed. 

Pinky took off his pasta wig and walked up to Wakko. “Oh, can I eat some of the spaghetti?” He pleaded with the middle child.

“Of course,” Wakko said, as he took the spaghetti and split it evenly between themselves and the smaller mouse. “After all, sharing is caring. Right, Brain?” 

The intelligent mouse was surprised that not only Wakko remembered his dry remark from their dinner at McDonald’s, but how he has taken it to heart. “That’s correct, Wakko.” 

Pinky took one of the strands and offered it to Brain. “Here, you take this end of the spaghetti  and we’ll recreate that iconic kiss from Lady and the Tramp!” 

Brain silently shoved the spaghetti back to Pinky. “A tempting offer, but I would prefer to have pasta that wasn’t stuffed in someone’s pocket for Lord knows how long.” 

“Okay, more for me!” Pinky said before slurping the spaghetti. Brain shook his head at his partner’s moronic display. 

Pinky was about to give Brain a kiss, but Brain held his hand up before their lips could collide. “I will only kiss you after you brush your teeth.” He commanded. 

“Right!” Pinky agreed. 

“Okay children, you know the routine.” Brain addressed. 

The Warners nestled themselves underneath the covers. They were rather exhausted after an eventful day and were ready to hit the hay. 

Pinky and Brain gave each of the siblings their mandatory goodnight kiss on the cheek before Wakko gave them a goodnight smooch on their heads in return. After the middle child placed them on the nightstand, the mice hopped to their bed. 

By the time Wakko turned off the lamp, Brain collapsed on the pillow, eager to fall asleep. The mouse closed his eyes and was ready to drift off to his slumber when he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. 

He opened his eyes to see Pinky gazing at him with a worried look. 

“Don’t go to sleep just yet,” Pinky said. “I’ve got a surprise for you in the bathroom.” 

“Well, that doesn’t sound unsettling in the slightest.” Brain sarcastically remarked. 

“But Brain,” Pinky whined. 

Brain looked into Pinky’s eyes and pondered for a moment. The last surprise Pinky planned for him turned out to be a fun karaoke night. Perhaps he should have more faith in his partner and indulge in whatever he had in store for him. 

“Oh, alright.” Brian surrendered in an exasperated tone. 

“Great!” Pinky cheered as he gave Brain a quick smooch on his chubby cheek. “I promise you’re gonna love it! Just give me ten minutes to prepare!” 

With that, the lanky mouse hopped down from the bed and scurried over to the restroom. Brain placed his paw over his right cheek and let out a tired sigh. “I don’t know whether to be excited or scared of what that imbecile has up his sleeve.” 

AN: I apologize for the long break between chapters. I was feeling the winter blues and hit a bad writer’s block. Fortunately, I managed to overcome that roadblock and now I’m focusing on my writing. The next chapter is going to be considerably shorter compared to the last few chapters and more Brinky-centric, but it’s just as important in regards to character growth.

[godiyggs]

Not As Think As You Drunk I Am.

request: “71- with eliza or angelica, like they walk into their house and see a y/n in a very drunk state saying nonsenses preety please uwu✨” @your-fella-joung-gremlin

prompt: 71: “You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?”

pairing: eliza schuyler x fem! reader

a/n: this was such a cute lil drabble for me to write 🥺 i went with eliza on this one! hope you enjoy my lovely readers <3 also kinda made it a friends to lovers au! hope u don’t mind ! if it wasn’t quite what you wanted, just shoot me a message and i’ll rewrite! ( modern au )

————————————————

It was 3 am when Eliza woke up to her phone ringing. the ungodly hour of 3 am. she lay there facing her ceiling in hopes that, eventually, it would stop ringing. she let out a breath of relief when it finally did. but then came the sound of about a dozen text messages right after it.

she groaned softly before sitting up and grabbing her phone. “crap!” she gasped out as she saw the insane number of unread messages and missed calls from you. she internally scolded herself for not having guessed that sooner. it seemed like such a you thing to do. panic grew inside her as she thought about the reason you were calling.

were you perhaps hurt? had you gotten yourself into trouble? did you need her help or advice with something? she chewed on her bottom lip as she quickly dialed your number. she felt uneasy as the line was still ringing, you hadn’t yet picked up.

her suspicion of you being in danger grew stronger as a few more seconds passed and you didn’t answer. the panic grew stronger when it sent her to your voicemail. she shot up from her bed, quickly getting dressed and shoving on the closest pair of shoes. she cursed under her breath at the traffic, she felt as if she had limited time to get to you.

shutting her car door, she quickly got out of her car rushing up to your door. just her luck, it was locked. “of course it would be locked, any person with common sense would lock their door...think” she whispered to herself

eliza flushed at your endless giggles. “so you’ve just been out here in the heat, for 2 hours?” you said, a little worried but mostly with humor. she pouted “it isn’t funny! how was i supposed to know you wouldn’t be home, i don’t know your everyday schedule.” “considering you want to be around me all the time i’d think that you do” you winked playfully at her. her heart did 3 backflips.

“you’re a good friend of mine of course i wanna be around you.” she shot back, sticking her toungue out. she could’ve sworn she saw your smile fall for a second. “yeah, yeah, whatever. i know you love me, liza! there’s spare keys under the doormat by the way” you laughed at eliza’s embarrassed expression.

Eliza smiles fondly at the memory before pulling the spare key out and making her way in. “ y/n..?” she called out, peaking into the living room. and there you were, sat in front of the fireplace next to a glass and 2 empty bottles of wine. “oh great.” eliza laughed nervously. “ y/n... whatcha doin there?” she giggled, stepping into the room fully.

you looked up from staring into the nothingness of the fire, a dopey smile on your face. and again eliza felt her heart race as you beamed up at her, cheeks red and hair a little messy. “eliiizaaa~” you sang out, before laying fully on the ground. she plopped down next to you. “You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?”

you almost looked offended at her question. “mmm...no... ‘course not” you replied, furrowing your eyebrows. you looked up at eliza whom was sat next to your drunk figure. “have i ever told you how extreeemely beautiful you are-?” your words slurred a bit.

Eliza’s breath caught in her throat. she definitely heard you right even through your drunk state. she breathed deeply to calm her racing heart. running her fingers through your hair, she spoke “and you are extremely drunk, lovely.” your gaze on her was as if you were admiring her.

“i like that nickname” you grinned. “i think i should give you one too, like...like the prettiest girl in the world!” eliza laughed. “nicknames are meant to be short” you pouted. “you’re short.” she lovingly rolled her eyes.

“okay, i think it’s time you go to bed. you are gonna have a killer hangover in the morning that’s for sure.” she moved your hair out of your face. “no! not yet. i wanna be awake...with you...” you trailed off at the end. “i’ll be here when you wake up, y/n.” she smiled reassuringly.

she helped you get on your feet and make your way upstairs to your room (you tripped about 2 times, the second was on purpose just to see eliza laugh). she was sat on the edge of the bed, an hour had passed and she’d assumed you had fallen asleep. that is until she shifted slightly and you called out for her.

she sighed before turning to you. “what is it?” you bit your lip. “i’m sorry. i probably woke you up and you probably have better things to do-“ she cut you off “don’t say that y/n. yeah, you did wake me up but i don’t mind. there’s not much im doing in the morning anyway.” she said, in her soft voice that you loved so much. “thank you for this, by the way. i love you.”

“and i love you.” she replied. “in the same way i do you?” you blurted out, not thinking at all. her widened eyes shot up to meet yours. “what?” she asked gently. your sober conscious was telling you to stop, to just brush it off like nothing but you had kept it bottled in long enough.

“you say you love me but i want to know if it’s the same way i love you...i-it’s something beyond platonic liza. i love you. i wanna be with you.” fireworks went off in elizas chest once again, she felt the world stop. she bit her tongue and tried not to gain false hope. “y/n, you’re drunk-“ “no! i would say the same thing sober” you frowned, crossing your arms. she giggled at your childish antics. “don’t laugh...” you mumbled.

she stood up and walked to you, blush on her cheeks. “well, about your statement earlier.” she cupped you’re head in her hands. “i love you too. and it’s something beyond platonic as well” she placed a soft kiss on your nose.

“you missed.” you shot out, smirking. she looked at you, puzzled. “hm?” before she could even process anything else, your lips were on hers in a flash. and her stomach filled with butterflies as she kissed back gently. after a few seconds, you both pulled away. noses resting against each other, giggles and occasional nose kisses being shared.

next thing you know, she’s cuddled up to you. you’d fallen asleep right after the soft moment, knocked out cold and snoring. eliza rested her head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat. the thud of it was relaxing to her, and she follows right in your footsteps.

you woke up the next morning with a horrible headache, regretting drinking so much last night. however your regret faded when you looked down at eliza sleeping soundly in your embrace.

recalling the past events, you shared a high five with your drunk self.

that girl is mine...

[justgottafinishthischapter]

Building Character: Sorting Hat

So recently on my main channel, I started breaking down different kinds of people you’d find in the four houses of Hogwarts when it dawned on me that this could be a useful character building exercise. So, I’m going to lay out all 48 archetypes that I named and show how this can be used to outline a character.

The Sorting Process:

My method for sorting characters is to lay out all of the archetypes I’ve found in the Hogwarts Houses, and then compare to the traits of my characters and use a score sheet to determine the best sorting for a character. I’ve already made a score card here. Luckily, all four have been given the same number of archetypes, and now it’s time to meet the archetypes.

GRYFFINDOR

The Jock

Bold, confident, adventurous, and boasting a strong quidditch team, it’s no surprise that Gryffindor is viewed as the Jock clique of the four houses. The house values of determination and relentlessness makes for quality athletes. The stereotype of the brainless jock also persists, as Gryffindor is the house most likely to be considered less than impressive in the academic sphere. Jocks also tend to form close-knit bonds with others like them, just as lions move in prides, and Gryffindors tend to behave similarly, preferring to stick with large friend circles of their own kind. This archetype could just as easily be dubbed “The Frat Guy”, but Jock is more gender-inclusive.

The Brat

Time to rip the bandage off. Gryffindor is spoiled and pampered. Between the text itself and the author who wrote it, the general opinions of the fanbase, and the clear bias of the school staff, Gryffindor is painted as the best and favorite house. It hogs most of the spotlight, and there’s even a general consensus that the other houses are all inferior to golden favorite Gryffindor. This sense of self-importance, entitlement, and blatant unfair favoritism can give Gryffindors an unpleasant and arrogant ego. This can lead them to breaking rules, bullying, and belittling other houses due to this innate sense of superiority and impunity.

The Coward

Counter-intuitive as it might seem, cowards actually fit in nicely with Gryffindor. After all, bravery is not the absence of fear, but the willingness to rise above it. The story even frames this as the most noble kind of Gryffindor. Those who act in spite of their fears. Many of the major Gryffindor characters could easily have been in other houses, but instead chose to be brave.

The Champion

When Gryffindor is flavored with Hufflepuff, they can become a champion, someone who fights in the place of others. Someone who fights for those who cannot protect themselves. The Champion can also champion against something, such as fighting against inequality, tyranny, or corruption. They can even fight on their own behalf. This is simply an archetype not afraid to raise a fuss, call people out, and issue a challenge.

The Explorer

The Ravenclaw among Gryffindors, the Explorer is constantly seeking out new things. New places, new friends, new experiences. These are the Gryfindors who fear boredom or getting stale. Life is an adventure, and there’s no point living the same day twice. Even a bad experience is a chance to learn, grow, and explore something that they didn’t know before.

The Diva

The Slytherin variety, the Diva is proud, flamboyant, confident, and ostentatious. Whereas the Slytherin Star archetype chases fame because of ambitions, Divas have powerful personalities that command attention and recognition. Stars perform to rise to power and glory. Divas perform because it makes them happy to pursuit their passions. Even someone who doesn’t perform can still be a diva if they’re dramatic, over-react, and live for that tea. They can be temperamental, flighty, and a bit vain, but they’re made to entertain.

The Risk-Taker

Gryffindors aren’t known for planning head. They’re reckless, headstrong, and fly by the seat of their pants, and the Risk-Taker is no exception. They don’t let rules, traditions, or the risk of repercussions to stop them from doing what they want. They’ll take any dare, climb any mountain, and ignore any safety warning in the pursuit of thrills and adventure.

The Immature

Just as Ravenclaw’s wisdom can make it more mature and responsible, Gryffindor’s tendency to act without thinking about the consequences tends to cause Gryffindors to behave childishly, inappropriately, and stupidly. It’s no surprise that the house that loses points the most for breaking the rules, talking back to teachers, and childish pranks is the house whose values encourage irresponsible behavior.

The Genki

The Japanese subculture of Genki is characterized by an overzealous, energetic, and upbeat personality, one which is usually loud, outgoing, and talkative. They wear their hearts on their sleeve, and speak their mind openly. This zest of lively bubbliness is often viewed as charming and likable, which fits the image of the popular Gryffindor.

The Monarch

Gryffindors are often seen as the house of leaders and heroes. As the king the other houses follow and bow to. Leadership isn’t all just crowns and a fancy office. It involves making tough decisions and having the nerve to push yourself and others forward. The image of “The Good King” enforces the Gryffindor values of leading by example, and that just and moral leadership will produce a just and moral world.

The Popular

It’s no secret that Gryffindor is kind of the house of the Popular kids. Their friendly and social nature makes them people that others want to be around. While the Gryffindor ego can branch this archetype off into the Alpha Bitch and the Jerk Jock, the verdict still stands that the most popular people in Hogwarts are likely a part of this house. Even the house itself shares this popularity, as it is the most liked and often preferred of the four houses.

The Fool

The Prankster. The Class Clown. The Fool is someone who isn’t afraid to push the envelope to get a laugh. Gryffindors are unarguably the most social house, and that desire to impress and bond with others can compel them to stop at nothing to entertain themselves and others through their antics. However, they also tend to get in trouble for this behavior, and they have to be cautious: as sometimes the risk outweighs the humor, only making them a laughing stock, rather than a laugh riot.

HUFFLEPUFF

The Sidekick

Much as it stings, this House is a mass production house for sidekicks and comic relief characters to balance with the typically Gryffindor protagonist. Hufflepuff’s values of loyalty, friendship, and integrity make for very good friend characters. Hufflepuffs as the main character are pretty uncommon, mostly popping up as the support of the team. The healer, the defender, the plucky bard with an inspirational speech. But that loyalty and integrity is truly commendable, as they are some of the most dependable and trustworthy figures.

The Paragon

When “Too Good for This Sinful World” is taken literally, these characters have moral fibers so squeaky clean that they legally cannot say “fuck”. This archetype is the living embodiment of Lawful Good. These are the characters who play by the rules always. Who decry any action that means taking the low road. The Paragon comes in two different flavors depending on the tone. They’re either the one good person who win because they played fair and who people should strive to be like, or they’re the noble idiot walking right into a trap because they’re too naive to realize that they’re the only person playing by the rules.

The Heart

Some people can lie, cheat, and steal. Some are good at pretending they’re a different sort of person. But, not this Hufflepuff Archetype. They feel too often, too strongly, and too genuinely to pull off hiding how they feel. This archetype is a bit of an open book. What you see is what you get. That’s not to say that they never tell a lie, but they’re also more likely to come clean about it sooner or later just to get it off their chest.

The Hero

Although Hufflepuff is mostly a support house, occasionally, they get to play the lead. Most common in Shonen Anime, this Gryffindor/Hufflepuff hybrid archetype fights for what’s right because it’s the right thing to do. Think of this archetype as the White Knight. A crusader against injustice who fights with integrity and does so for the good of the people. They fight because somebody has to. Because they don’t want people to be afraid, alone, or injured. They strive to be a beacon that lights the way in dark times, and gives people something to hope for.

The Councilor

The Ravenclaw hybrid of Hufflepuff house, the Councilor is someone who helps others by listening to their problems and offering advice, guidance, or support in whatever capacity they can. They care about the well-being of others and offer themselves as a trusting confidante. They are gentle and reassuring, having the patience and open-mindedness to help others deal with their issues in a positive and healthy way.

The Entrepreneur

The Slytherin among Hufflepuffs, the Entrepreneur is someone who combines the hard-working work ethic of Hufflepuff with the ambition of Slytherin to be humble business owners. Their distinction from the Slytherin Workaholic is that Slytherins work to climb the corporate ladder. Hufflepuffs work because they love what they do and enjoy doing it. A less leader based sub-archetype is the worker bee, a hard worker who takes pride in doing a good job.

The Knight

The Knight is someone who is devoutly loyal to a cause or person. Their word is binding, and if they say they’re with you, they are with you, for better or worse. This also makes the Knight very easy to turn to the side of evil, as all it takes is swearing their loyalty to an evil person or cause for them to become a crusader for injustice and cruelty.

The Self-Righteous

Another Hufflepuff that can stray into villainy, a Hufflepuff can be a total villain if they mask their villainy behind a facade of being morally virtous.  The Self-Righteous is the embodiment of the religious extremist. Those who commit atrocities in the name of God, King, and Country, even if their God, King, or Country distinctly condemns such behavior. However, because they assume they are fulfilling the desires of something which is intrinsically righteous, that must make them automatically righteous as well.

The Puppy

The cinnamon roll. Sunshine personified. The Puppy is an upbeat optimist that generally sees the good in others. Like a newborn puppy they are excitable, friendly, eager to please, loyal, sweet, and happy. Some might say that they’re too optimistic, crossing the line into naive, gullible, or foolish. But the puppy’s optimism is often backed by a strong conviction and a desire to help that makes them much more resilient and strong-willed than people might assume. They make great friends as they’re always eager to help others in any way that they can, and even when upset with a person will usually look for a nicer way of airing their grievances with people.

The Peacekeeper

The Peacekeeper is someone who strives to help others live harmoniously. They break up fights, help people settle their arguments, and only fights to maintain peace. They are sensitive souls that can’t stand fighting, hostility, or bullying. They just want people to get along, and they’re willing to do what they can to make that happen.

The Caretaker

Hufflepuffs are very aware of other people. They’re the most socially intelligent house. This archetype is composed of those who take care of those around them. They’re the friends who remind others to take their medication, to ask them if they remembered to do their homework, or to make sure they’ve had something to eat. They care about the well-being of others, and will gently nurse, encourage, and support the people that matter to them. However, this archetype can also go so far that it needs itself, putting so much of their attention and time on taking care of others that they need someone to remind them that self-care is also important.

The Mundane

So many people focus on the fact that Hufflepuff is the house of modesty and loyalty that they tend to overlook that the house is also the catch-all house of students who don’t fit into the other three houses. So, this Archetype is for people who aren’t really exceptional in anything. They aren’t brave like Gryffindor, Wise like Ravenclaw, or Cunning like Slytherin. They’re the “normal” or “average” person. Someone who doesn’t come across as being important or impressive. But Helga Hufflepuff saw the value in accepting anyone as long as she had room at her table.

RAVENCLAW

The Nerd

The first thing we think of when we hear Ravenclaw, Nerds are walking encyclopedias with a treasure trove of facts and information. They tend to study because they enjoy learning. For them, school was fun, and the library is an important place. If the burning of the Library of Alexandria angers you, welcome home ya nerd.

The Geek

Nerds know facts, Geeks know pop culture. If you know what year the first issue of Superman comics was written, you’ve found your label. A geek lives for cosplay, fandom, conventions, shipping, fanfiction, and memorabilia. And they are not Nerds. Nerds and Geeks are different, but can overlap. However, you don’t have to know book smarts to be a Geek.

The Bookworm

Not all Ravenclaws are brainiacs. The Bookworm has a love for reading that is not directly tethered to book smarts. For this archetype, reading is a relaxing hobby.  It is often a trait among introverts, especially as a way to decompress, and they also tend be loners who prefer their quiet alone time.

The Valedictorian

Expect this archetype to have the highest grades, to be part of every club or organization, and has probably run for class president. A Ravenclaw with an undercurrent of Slytherin, they are ambitious in their intellectual pursuits. The main thing keeping them out of Slytherin house is their love of learning and knowledge which overshadows their ambition to achieve.

The Advocate

Just as the Valedictorian has elements of Slytherin, the Advocate has elements of Gryffindor. The advocate champions the rights of the underdog, stands up to hypocrisy, and points out logical fallacies in any argument. They hold up the light of truth and knowledge to combat ignorance and prejudice through their insight and knowledge.

The Dreamer

The Hufflepuff among Ravenclaws, The Dreamer is a Ravenclaw who believes in the inherit goodness of the world. These Ravenclaws may be seen as overly optimistic and naive, but this just speaks to Ravenclaw House’s knack for marching to its own beat, and standing out in a way that shows the house’s unique and open-minded world view.

The Scientist

Typically the standard “brain” of a team in fiction, most team brains tend to be nerdy in math and/or science, such as Pidge, Edd, and Entrapta. The Scientist is invested in scientific endeavors. They seek knowledge, but can easily be warped into the Mad Scientist, as characters like Lord Orochimaru, Rick Sanchez, and Shou Tucker cross the moral line as they perform inhuman experiments in pursuit of knowledge. They tend to value logic and the scientific approach, and will seek out evidence and statistics to reach a conclusion.

The Investigator:

Those who thirst for answers, The Investigator’s interest in knowledge is directly impacted by a desire to know and understand more. However, unlike the Scientist that may use this knowledge for personal gain, The Investigator prefers exposing the truth and uncovering the facts. They love cracking codes, solving riddles, unearthing secrets, and exposing the truth.

The Adult:

Ravenclaw is a house associated with wisdom, and with wisdom comes maturity, responsibility, and leadership. Expect these people to be mom friends and dad friends, offering advice, taking care of others, and typically being mature for their age, and wise beyond their years. They behave like an adult, even from an early age. They may get a bad wrap for being boring instead of young and reckless, but they are also sensitive, stable, and trustworthy.

The Creative:

Ravenclaws tend to think outside the box, and that wild imagination and intelligence tends to leak out as writing, painting, dancing, acting, and any other creative endeavor. Even those who lack the talent to be an artist themselves can still fall under this archetype if they appreciate and value the arts and creative acts.

The Unconventional:

Ravenclaw is known for being a little odd. Ravenclaws revel in their unusual eccentricities. They’re fine marching to the beat of their own drum. A bit of a nutty genius, artists like Salvadore Dali, David Bowie, and Mozart are known for being unusual. Entire artistic movements like cubism, avaunt guard, and club kid fashion follow this zany mindset.

The Cloudcuckoolander:

Separate from the Unconventional, the Cloudcuckoolander is someone whose mind is a strange and unusual thing to outsiders. They come off as almost being detached from reality, their head in the clouds, and seeming odd in their mannerisms. People tend to treat them as delusional or crazy, but they show themselves to be strangely insightful into others.

SLYTHERIN

The Mastermind:

Exemplified by a ruthless pursuit of power, the Mastermind treats situations like a game of chess, always plotting to give themselves the upper hand. They are cunning, ruthless, and goal-oriented, usually with an emphasis on control, dominance, and authority. They usually gravitate toward leadership positions and can be very skilled at getting others to comply with their wishes. This archetype is usually seen in villains like Regina Mills, Princess Azula, and Cersei Lannister. However, occasionally, this archetype gets to be seen in a better light with characters such as Daenerys Targaryen. And sometimes it’s played for laughs, such as with Brain and Plankton’s plans for world domination.

The Perfectionist:

This ambitious go-getter is characterized by a strong drive to be exceptional in everything they do. These are the characters who strive for the highest accolades, the top marks, and mastering anything they put their mind to. Often either a cry for validation or as a means to pursue their ambitions, this type of Slytherin is all about standing out by rising above the rest. They are driven by a desire to be their best self, and they’ll work themselves ragged to hold themselves to that high standard.

The Workaholic:

Tangentially related but distinct from the last archetype, the Workaholic is someone who basically treats their entire life like a business or a job. They have a planner loaded to the brim with a schedule that always keeps them moving, and leaves very little time for other things and people unless they can manage to pencil them in somewhere. These ambitious folks are very likely to succeed in life, but their social lives tend to suffer as a result.

The Detective:

Often mistaken for Ravenclaws, or straddling the line as Slytherclaws, The Detective archetype of Slytherin is someone who studies and learns things not for the simple joy of learning as true Ravenclaws do, but more often for the challenge, thrill, or to get what they’re after. This archetype views knowledge as a vital tool and weapon in their endeavors. Even if they enjoy learning, the knowledge they seek out is specifically related to what they are trying to accomplish.

The Tactician:

Like the Detective that teeters on the Ravenclaw line, the Tactician tends to straddle the line with Gryffindor. They can be brave, heroic, and reckless, but this archetype’s main distinction from a Gryffindor is their Slytherin tendencies. Whether they’re ambitious, clever, or strategic, they lack the brute force simplicity of a Gryffindor. A Gryffindor will rush in guns blazing, while a Slytherin knows the value of a sneak attack. Heroes like Percy Jackson, Link, and Katsuki Bakugou make full use of their cunning in the heat of a battle, looking for weakspots, analyzing the battlefield, and always willing to find a pragmatic solution to whatever they come across.

The Sincere:

The archetype to bleed over into Hufflepuff, this archetype is blunt, direct, and doesn’t sugar coat things. They are brutally honest. This can come across as mean and unsympathetic. But, even if it seems like they’re just dumping salt in the wound, it just means that they don’t pretend. They can be depended on to give the whole truth no matter how much it might sting. They might openly mock their friends, but when someone needs them, they can be depended on to give the most genuine feedback. And when things look bleak, this is a friend that can usually be relied on to offer their support. And if someone is too weak or scared to fight for themselves, The Sincere is the kind of friend who’s not afraid to get their hands dirty on someone else’s behalf.

The Charmer:

Ever aware of their public image, the Charmer is a Slytherin whose ambitions are met not through power, but through playing the social game. Experts at winning people over, these Slytherins can be just as ambitious and clever as any other. However, they choose instead to recruit and convince people to follow them and do their bidding with their charms and communication skills. They’re good at arguing their case, and speaking in such a way that people feel compelled to help them. This archetype often masquerades like they’re one of the other houses, especially Hufflepuff. But don’t let their charms fool you. They’re as Slytherin as they come.

The Rebel:

The Rebel is a Slytherin who much like Gryffindors view rules as more of a suggestion than anything else. They’re just trying to have fun and enjoy life, and rules tend to get in the way of that. Often pranksters, couch potatoes, or troublemakers, The Rebel tends to balance between being misunderstood and actual delinquency. However, their rebellious nature can drive them to question old norms and traditions and try to view the world in a new way. Their refusal to bow to old paradigms can mean that Rebel archetypes are champions for change and growth, for better or worse.

The Star:

A primadonna through and through, The Star archetype is one whose ambitions are focused directly on fame. All of their ambition and hard work is all in pursuit of that loftiest goal: the fleeting spotlight of celebrity. Whether they want to take Hollywood by storm, receive a standing ovation at center stage, or go viral on the internet, this archetype is determined to be in the spotlight and make a name for themselves. They can be divas, and may even be competitive with other performers, but it’ll all be worth it when they receive accolades for all of their talent and accomplishments.

The Rogue:

The Black Sheep. The dark knight. The Rogue is the typical anti-hero. Skirting the line between hero and villain, the Rogue is a pragmatist, able and willing to do what needs to be done without letting morality or personal feelings get in the way. Cynical, snarky, mean-spirited, and roguishly charming, the Rogue isn’t quite a bad guy, but being good does not mean being nice. Like The Sincere, The Rogue is unabashedly themselves, and lives earnestly.

The Survivalist:

The Slytherin mindset is one known for being pragmatic. A Slytherin will do what they must to get ahead. The Survivalist embodies this practical approach to problems, being flexible and adapting to situations in order to gain the upper hand. The Survivalist can be someone who survives in the wild, but it can also be someone whose loyalty, opinions, strategy and behaviors can easily change and adapt to new situations in order to thrive. They can thrive in a fast-paced high-stakes situation, and can usually improvise very well should their plans suddenly change. This ability to quickly adapt to circumstances makes this one type of Slytherin that’s hard to knock down.

The Competitor:

Fans of reality shows know that some of the greatest players are also some of the most diabolical and cut-throat. Evel Dick and Danielle were a wicked power duo in Big Brother 8, and Dan got 1st and 2nd in Big Brother 10 and 14 respectively. Slytherin and Gryffindor can both get competitive, but they play in different ways. Slytehrins are far more pragmatic, and have less of a problem lying to someone’s face to get ahead. These tactics, while underhanded, are great game moves. Dan hosting his own funeral in season 14 is still regarded as one of the most brilliant plays in Big Brother history because of how completely he flipped the power in the house. The Competitor can be a total monster, but they also tend to be monstrously entertaining.

Now that I’ve laid out the archetypes, I can start evaluating my characters. Looking over my protagonist, I’m pretty sure he’s a Ravenclaw, but let’s put the character to the sorting hat’s test. My character would fit into: [Gryffindor] -The Monarch [Hufflepuff] - the Heart - the Councilor - the Peacekeeper - the Mundane [Ravenclaw] - the Nerd - the Geek - the Bookworm - the Advocate - the Dreamer - the Adult - the Creative - the Unconventional [Slytherin] - the Perfectionist - the Charmer So this matches what I assumed, that he was a Ravenclaw main, and a Hufflepuff secondary, but I didn’t realize how far he was from being a Gryffindor or Slytherin. So his ratio chart would look like this:

While it’s not hard to sort characters, some aren’t always as clear-cut and I hope this writer’s aid helped you better define your character’s traits.

[immoral-tales]

Character Analysis: Osamu Dazai

001

A/N: this is a character analysis on Osamu Dazai with an older lover. Nonnie and I were discussing this concept back on my old blog. I adored these discussions, therefore, I have decided to move all of them here.

You, I really like you. Believe me, you are not the only one thinking Dazai would fit well with an older S/O. There are numerous reasons and I can write an entire dissertation on why Dazai would have a great relationship with an older S/O. I adore the concept of him having an older, more experienced S/O in almost every field. I need to calm down and sort out all of my thoughts, I have just returned from a trip and I jumped to my computer as soon as I read your message. First of all, I would like to thank you for sending this headcanon. I completely agree with you and I will defend this headcanon with my life. I do have one simple favor, could you send me more headcanons and concepts similar to this one? I love, love reading ideas about Dazai having an older S/O. I have a request sitting in my notifications about Dazai and his older S/O, if it is your request, then you are the best! It has been in my messages for some time now; however, it is one of my favorite requests, therefore, I’m going to take my sweet, sweet time to write it.

Dazai is a complex character, it is not a simple task to understand his layered personality. A young person will have difficulty understanding him and he would have a hard time opening up to a person who is in the same age range as him. You can argue with me about it, but I strongly believe he would be attracted to a woman who is in her late twenties or early thirties and emotionally stable. An understanding woman with a mature, yet playful personality. She should be understanding of Dazai’s situation. He has been through hell and back, Dazai has a nihilistic outlook on life as much as he refuses to admit it. His childish and foolish behavior is a facade and every one of us is well aware of it. It is his coping mechanism to cover his melancholy. If he decided to reveal his true colors, no one would accept him. A man like him has no place in the world of normal human beings, therefore, he would be quite lucky to find a person that would be by his side no matter the circumstances—a woman that would be with him until the end of the line. His S/O should not be discouraged by his suicidal tendencies. Quite the opposite, she should be able to handle his dark sense of humor and play along with him—bonus points if she has a similar taste in humor.

He needs a trustworthy woman by his side, a person he could rely on, and be able to rest his head on her shoulder at the end of a busy and tiring day, telling her about his day as he wraps his arms around her waist protectively. Despite all these traits, Dazai needs a person with a cunning intelligence and quick-witted to comprehend his mischievous attitude and tolerate his antics. His S/O should be quite educated and knowledgeable, as well. This man deserves the world, even though he wronged in the past, but he is trying his best to redeem himself. Perhaps, even Osamu Dazai deserves some happiness.

Additionally, I’m writing some one-shots for “Dragged Across Concrete” and there is one with Dazai and older S/O. If you are curious, I will reveal the name. Thank you for coming to my pep talk. With this, I rest my case.

I’m delighted to know I’m not the only one considering Dazai having an older S/O is adorable. There is no need to worry about it, everyone has their own preferences and there is nothing wrong about it. Hell, you should be proud of it and I’m with you on this one. My apologies to everyone, but I’m with this anon. I have read many stories with Dazai being paired up with an innocent, childish type and I simply cannot vibe with it. I do not have many stories published here, but if you read any of them, you will understand what type of personality I’m aiming for. An older/mature S/O for him is one of the best options for him and no one can change my mind. Therefore, I would like to thank you for agreeing with me. I greatly appreciate it. Imagine his S/O being a highly trained spy with a particular set of skills who is fully capable of keeping up with Dazai. As a spy with the years of experience under her belt, she can read people like an open book and this is what Dazai needs. A person that can understand him, without him uttering a word.

You have requests? Send them in. I might be slow as fuck, but I like to take my sweet, sweet time whilst working on them. I wish to give you quality content and not half-assed stories. The title of the one-shot is “Stray Dog Strut.” Whoops.

It is about Dazai falling deeply in love with a senior member!S/O, but she has difficulty understanding he is serious about his intentions with her, due to his constant flirting and what would he do to convince her that he is considering pursuing her. Is this your request?

I’m a fucking genius! Seriously though, I’m delighted to know the feeling is mutual. A childish, innocent reader is great and all, but you will have difficulty finding such content on this blog. Whoops. I might or might not like it when the readers in my writing have big dick energy and Dazai’s S/O is not going to be an exception either. I completely agree with you, once more. One simply does not go to Dazai when they have problems, you have Kunikida for that. Recently, I have been thinking about it—believe me, I have nothing else to do—and I strongly believe Dazai would never be attracted to a female version of himself, considering his past and mindset. His outlook on life does not help in this situation. I will die believing he is a nihilist and no one can change my mind. Despite his layered personality, at the end of the day, he is a nihilist. Therefore, to counter his complex character, we need an older, experienced reader that has seen enough in this world and would not be surprised to see one of his stunts. I will go into details, I have been waiting for this opportunity to whip out my concept of Dazai’s significant other. Thank you for giving me a perfect opportunity for it. A fair warning, mentions of suicidal tendencies. We are talking about Dazai, after all.

I have a strong desire to review his outlook on life and reveal which type would be a perfect match for our nihilist. This is my personal opinion, therefore, it would be natural for some of you to disagree. Let us proceed, shall we?

I will not bore you with his past since every one of you are familiar with it, more or less. Dazai has been exposed to death, violence, and brutality at a very young age. Hell, he met Mori at the age of fourteen as he attempted to take his own life, but most likely, failed. We, the readers of the manga and the watchers of the anime, are not certain of his living conditions. Unfortunately, it has never been revealed, therefore, let us assume he grew up in a horrible environment that led him to become quite suicidal, then apathetic. There are many factors that played a major role in making Dazai who he is today. If it had not been for Odasaku, he would have remained with the Port Mafia and surpassed Mori with his ruthlessness and holding no regard towards the life of a human being. Because of his past, he became a nihilist, but he is great at concealing it by plastering that ridiculous grin of his on his handsome face. Deep down, he is well aware he does not deserve to live because of the atrocities he had done, yet he does not deserve to die. He can still redeem himself and that is what he is doing. And he deserves to be happy, as well. I’m not saying, everyone has the right to be happy, but Dazai is one of them. All his life has been grey, but the time has come for him to see the world in black and white, perhaps, in colors, as well.

This man deserves someone who can truly love him and stay by his side no matter the circumstances. He needs an understanding, mature woman. She should be able to understand his dark sense of humor and play along with him. For instance, upon their first meeting—undoubtedly—he would suggest committing double suicide with him. I can imagine her responding with a low chuckle and asking him to reserve that place specifically for her, but first, she would prefer to get to know him better as she wishes to know the person whom she is going to commit double suicide. Her unusual response would pique his curiosity as he engages in conversation, asking some odd questions, but she answers all of them without breaking a sweat, watching Dazai’s reaction with great amusement. After his first encounter with her, he would reserve a special place for her but decides to put his suicidal tendencies aside as he interacts with her, getting to know her better. If she allows him to be physically affectionate with her, then it is expected to find his face buried in her chest. He adores those titties—size and shape do not matter to him. And another weakness of his would be her thighs, as well. As he gets comfortable with her, he discovers she is quite good at holding decent conversations and drinking whiskey alone at his favorite bar is no longer an option because he has her. During one of their conversations, he discovers she is a realist, sees the world the way it is, not the way she wants to see it. Dazai is fascinated by her outlook on life and her personality draws him more and more. He becomes infatuated with her and as he spends more time with her, he realizes he cannot imagine his life without her. The woman becomes more than just his drinking buddy. Yes, they do not have much in common, but it does not stop Dazai from harboring romantic feelings for her. At first, he does not understand these foreign feelings, but then he discovers he is head over heels in love with her and he has no desire to let her go. His life would be empty without her.

My apologies, I have got carried away, but I’m rather passionate when it comes to Dazai. Even though I’m Dostoyevsky’s slut, I still love Dazai. In the beginning, I thought Dazai and happiness should not be used in the same sentence, but now, I’m convinced even he is capable of loving; however, I’m not too certain about Fedya.

Before I rest my case, I want to add, even if Dazai cannot love, he would genuinely care for her like he cares for his colleagues and watches out for them. In the present, he is fully capable of feeling such a feeling, but his past self would not.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.