#Crosswords are fun i promise!

[gallusrostromegalus]

I'm glad to hear that Kaname protected Momo from the worst of Aizen's manipulations. Does she ever find out about his efforts, or does that stay a secret?

Post-Aizen-Fight, Kaname is in the hospital recovering from General Befuckening, and needs Reiatsu transfers to finish purging The Curse from his system and it's Hitsugaya's turn.

*****

The boy doesn't actually say anything for a long time after Unohana finishes connecting the IVs. It's alright. He's still exhausted, and there really isn't that much to say about what happened that hasn't been gone over and over and over, in debriefings and staff meetings and the distant sound of tears Tousen can hear coming from Lieutenant Hinamori's room. Gradually though, Lieutenant Hitsugaya's silence grows cold and sharp and restless, a winter gale banging against a window that won't quite latch right.

"-Out with it." Kaname sighs, opening his eyes and not frowning at the ceiling. "If you keep sulking like this I'm going to get frostbite and Unohana-sama will have both our hides for it."

Toshiro startles, coughs a bit like he's about to deny it, but collects himself and states his problem with magnificent succinctness.

"Momo." he says, voice almost violent in it's neutrality.

"Ah." Kaname nods. "I did what I could, but I know that was far from enough. I am sorry."

Hitsugaya is quiet, considering his words. "...What did you DO, actually?" he eventually asks.

Kaname blinks in surprise. "Huh. I thought Hisagi-san would have noticed when he did the audit of all my paperwork. I was genuinely hopeful you were going to spot it before Aizen could make his move with how much Momo complained..." he muttered, slightly puzzled.

"Spotted what?" Toshiro grumbled.

"You have undoubtedly been subject to the ongoing saga of the Rice-Farm-Subsidy Fraud case that Lieutenant Hinamori has been investigating since her promotion to lieutenancy?" Kaname prompted.

"Yeah, yeah, the one that's got her haring off to some backwater district or getting lost in the stacks at the archives for days on end or-" Hitsugaya graoned, then stopped. "...the one that had her constantly traveling away from the division, or doing extended research without Aizen's help."

"He used to get terrible motion sickness from trains or portals, you know." Kaname smiled, sitting up a bit. "-and a wretched allergy to paper-dust. Part of the reason he made me do all his fucking lab work, I imagine. but it seemed a good way to keep Miss Hinamori outside his sphere of influence at least for a few weeks at a time. Do I still have water in my glass?"

"...you MADE IT UP?" Hitsugaya yelped.

"I did no such thing. There is an extensive conspiracy between the various provincial leaders and mid-district governors to defraud the Central Government of subsidies for rice farms that frankly, do not exist, while also hiding the existence of taxable villages, resulting in invisible granaries used to fund private armies and other villiany-" he explained, sitting up properly and groping for the end-table where his water theoretically was. "-I just made sure Miss Hinamori had enough information to know where to look for the evidence of said conspiracy, and occasionally... lightly interfered with granaries in the middle districts to make sure more visible evidence came to light for her to keep the investigation open and moving in a timely manner. Lieutenant, if I may ask for your help-"

There was a rustle of cloth as Hitsugaya shook himself, grabbing the pitcher and refilling Kaname's glass, handing it to the frail man.

"Thank you." Kaname took a drink, handing the glass back to Toshiro to set down. "-I imagine the investigation will go much faster and with fewer extended trips to the rukongai now that I'm not cursed and can freely discuss the taxation and census records Aizen had covered in his illusion to hide his experiments." he explained. "...But doing it the long way has allowed Miss Hinamori to build a very complete and entirely legitimate case. She's an exceptional forensic investigator."

"...HOW?" Hitsugaya gaped. "The curse- it's not like you could talk to her, or send her messages- and if you could, it'd mess with the legitimacy of the case to have an anonymous tipster?"

"I had to...sort of gently suggest the names and locations to her in such fashion that her subconscious would make the connection between those terms and the case. Fortunately, in addition to being a certifiable genius, Miss Hinamori is also a master of the Lingual Arts."

"...Sir, I don't think Hinamori is that kind of girl." Toshiro mumbled, and Kaname could almost hear his full-face blush.

"You're thinking of Zaraki-Taicho, who is an entirely different kind of cunning linguist." Momo announced from the door. "-but you don't know everything about me Toshiro." She teased, coming in the room and climbing onto the bed beside Kaname, unfolding and re-folding that week's newspaper. "Lieutenant Sasakibe took over the crossword in your absence, and I think he may still be a bit upset with you."

"Ah." Kaname winced.

"What?" Repeated Toshiro, thoroughly lost.

"You remember that Tousen-taicho is the Editor-In-Chief of the Seireitei Newsletter, right?" She asked Hitsugaya, who failed to respond in a fashion that suggested that he did not, in fact, know that. "-Anyway, sometimes he writes more or less for the paper depending on that week's news, but without fail, he also designs the crossword- the most fiendishly difficult one in any of the newspapers, Sir." She explained, taking out a pen and tapping the partially-finished lexical puzzle she'd been working on.

"I try." Kaname smiled, looking just a bit genuinely smug.

"You largely succeed. I didn't actually make the connection between your five downs and the rice subsidy investigation until i tried doing Sasakibe's substitute puzzle this morning. I think he may have made the same connection, because 5 down today is 11 letters, starts with "P" and the clue is 'Degenerate Justice'."

"...Prevaricate." Kaname hissed with imagined pain at the likely wrath of the Chief Lieutenant. "Oh dear. Do you think a written apology is in order?"

"It's Sasakibe-san, it's just as likely to be his idea of an apology." Momo shrugged, filling in the word.

"...for those of us that are better at Sudoku?" Hitsugaya glared.

"Tousen-Taicho was putting clues about where the next bit of evidence I needed for the Rice Subsidies case in the Crossword because he knew I did it every week." Momo explained. "The clue was always in the fifth column down, which is a structurally important one in crosswords- you little shit, I even got on your case last year about how you always used locations for your 5 Downs and I STILL didn't make the connection!" She realized, rolling up the paper and affectionately swatting him over the head.

"Entirely deserved, but you have my word that was as much as I could do to help you, and that you have my full resources available to you now." Kaname smiled.

"I have entirely too many words from you-" Momo sighed with exasperation before putting the paper down and laying down beside him, hugging his chest. "-But I believe you. There's- I've been finding all sorts of things- people I forgot, places I'd been before and couldn't remember- huge sections of my LIFE! that his Illusion just... vanished."

She hugged Kaname's chest. "-I can't imagine what you went through."

"I hope you never will." he sighed, returning her embrace and for a moment, Hitsugaya felt even more outside the conversation- this was a secret grief, but the burden lightened by finally being able to share it. "...Did Sasakibe Key any clues to 5 Down? He might have more to say." Kaname asked, letting go and Momo sat up, frowning at the paper.

"Key?" Asked Toshiro, pleased to be talking about anything else.

"Sometimes one word is a hint to some of the next words, usually the ones that originate from it, um- Yeah, three words. Four letters, second letter 'i', clue is "Astronomical Favor"; Three letters, middle letter 'a', clue is "German Opera, 1874" ; and the last one is four letters, Second letter 'e', clue is "Truth's Abode". Momo read off.

All three of them stared (or pointed their faces) blankly at each other for a moment.

"...Yeah I'm gonna stick to the Sudoku." Nodded Hitsugaya.

[pinguwrites]

𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔' 𝑺𝒚𝒏𝒅𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒆 ⸻ Chapter One

series masterlist. next chapter

𝒑𝙖𝒊𝙧𝒊𝙣𝒈 | francis mosses x reader

𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 | 1.5k

Warnings: none

A/N: I promise it'll get more exciting later lol

The elevator dinged, and your heart raced. It was dark out, and so the lobby was dimmed — that blue hue that came right before the sun’s rising. After peeking a small look to the side, you quickly went back to the newspaper you were reading, as if you hadn’t noticed the sound at all. Though you didn’t need to hear or see to know who it was. No one else in Sama Place got up this early, except perhaps for you. It was you and Francis Mosses, every day alone at five in the morning. Perfect, wasn’t it?

“Mornin’,” he said, tipping his hat slightly. It was white, with the words “MILKMAN” etched onto the front. If anything, that added detail made him look even more handsome — uniformed, well-put-together, with just a hint of authority. Everything you liked. 

“Good morning, Francis,” you greeted, resting your elbows on the desk in front of you. Placing the newspaper aside, you focused your attention on him, but when he approached you, he took it between his fingers and flipped to the page you were at. 

“Crossword? It’s a bit early for that,” he mused, eyeing all the columns and rows you filled in. It was a hard one, but nothing you couldn’t handle. Besides, what else were you supposed to do, stare at the wall waiting to say ‘hi’ to the next person who came by?

“I like puzzles, they get me thinking . . . you know, you should do something like this, too.” Francis furrowed his eyebrows, just slightly. “Not puzzles, necessarily. But a hobby.”

It just occurred to you at this very moment that he probably did have a hobby, but as someone who was just a doorwoman, you weren't privy to that information.

“I’m sure you do,” you added with a chuckle. “It’s only that I never see you doing anything but work. You’re so tired all the time. How much effort does being a milkman really require?”

He bit his lower lip. “More than you think. I used to get up at one.”

The idea that whatever company he was working for forced him to do this made you upset. Francis deserved nothing but freedom and long vacations and waking up to brunch, not whatever coffee he drank in the morning to get himself going. 

“One?” you repeated, absolutely stunned. “Well, I’m glad you managed to change your shift. Most bosses I know aren’t flexible with that sort of stuff.”

“I was actually doing fine with my original hours. I just changed them because . . .”

“Because what?”

He thought for a moment, his cheeks dusted pink. “Wanted to enjoy the world a little. Can’t very well do that if you have to sleep at seven in the afternoon.” He paused. “I have to go, I’ll see you later tonight, ma’am.”

“Alright. Have a nice day, sir.”

You watched as he left, a longing gaze. In your mind, you imagined spending time with him, whether it be to see a movie or just walk around the city. You found that highly unlikely, though. Mostly because you could never bring yourself to ask him, and never thought he would ever ask you. 

+++

“Really?” you said, a little disappointed. “I’d hate to see you go.”

Dr. William Afton shrugged, a grin across his lips. “I mean, it’s quite the modern idea, don’t you think? I think there ought to be more family restaurants out there. And with my engineering background, I think I’m just the right man to create something fun for children.”

“Your idea sounds like a science fiction novel,” you admitted, “but I like it. What does Mia think?”

“Oh, I had to convince her a little, but in the end, she’ll do as I say. Besides, we’re not moving very far. Just closer to the suburbs.”

You nodded. “I’ll miss you. Make sure to stop by again when you can.”

He agreed and went on his way to finish moving the rest of his belongings to his car. It was silly to want him to stay, but that was how it felt here. Everyone knew everyone, it was like a family. You’d made more friends here than you ever did before. Change wasn’t something you enjoyed.

+++

The day had passed by quickly. You took your lunch break and then went straight back to work. You made a few calls to make sure things were in order. If anything was wrong with the plumbing or if the wallpaper had chipped — things like that — it was your responsibility to fix it. Taking calls for potential renters, being in general a polite and pleasant person, it all came with your job. 

It was unusual for a woman to hold this kind of position. Women barely worked at all. Most were housewives or teachers or secretaries. The fact that you even got this job at all was a miracle. And the fact that the people in this building were so pleasant was a blessing.

After your father died you thought everything was over. He left you a house, a small, one-story building with a nice lawn and a small backyard. It was closed off from the rest of the street, the way he liked it. Away from others, with his own peace. You supposed that trait passed down to you. Other than a simple conversation, you preferred to be by yourself rather than out with a large group of friends, partying at risqué clubs. Besides, even if you liked that kind of stuff, your father would never have approved. 

You were dependent on him, right till the very end. Though you graduated from college, you didn’t know how to get a loan from a bank, drive a car, or even do your taxes. The easiest thing to do was to find a husband, but it was just so difficult. When you saw that sign outside of Sama saying ‘HIRING NOW’ you knew that was where you had to go. A new start. New opportunity. For the first time, you could make your own money, support yourself, and live the life you want.

You sighed, thinking about everything as you leaned back in your chair. The weather was hot today, so you set the fan beside your desk on. It was blowing through your hair, the coolness brushing against your skin with relief. It made your skirt rumple at the ends, but whenever it did that you just straightened it out, pulling it over your knees once more. 

“Hey,” a voice said behind you. 

Startled, you sat up straight, only to realize it was just Anastacha, the girl from the second floor. She lived with her mom, who was a cook at a restaurant, but apparently trying to make it as a chef. She had pigtails in her hair like always and was wearing a simple plaid dress. 

“You scared me,” you said, tone both playful and scolding. “Don’t do that again.”

“Sorry,” she apologized, but she didn’t seem very sorry. “I need help with my homework. Mom says you had a good education, and that if I ever needed help I could just come to you.”

You smiled warmly. “Sure. Pull up that chair over there, and I’ll see what I can do.”

You looked through the folder. It was just basic algebra, nothing too difficult. You remembered doing this in middle school. For the next ten minutes, you both read through each problem and solved it together. She had a lot of questions — annoying ones — but it was fine. She was just a kid, and you were happy to help.

Just as you were explaining the last part to her, the front door opened. 

It was Francis. 

Distracted, you glanced up and down his body. Was it odd that you found him the most beautiful man ever? His long, Roman nose, and his smooth, pale skin. The way the veins in his hands flexed every time he moved them, the light blue dress shirt that hugged his slim, muscled arms, and that dark, tousled hair, widow’s peak dipped in the middle of his forehead.

He passed by you with a short nod. It almost hurt that he didn’t bother to stay longer, but you could see the bags under his eyes and his sluggish movements. He was tired. And to be fair, so were you.

When the elevator door closed, Anastacha exclaimed, “Oh, he likes you!”

“Shh!” You didn’t need people hearing that. “He does not. Do you want to finish this or not?”

“He does,” she insisted with a giggle. “You saw the way he looked at you?”

“You can’t determine things based on a single look.”

“Yes, I can. Mr. Mosses is nice, but he kind of just ignores everyone. He doesn’t do that with you.”

The thought that Francis may like you was an intoxicating one. He was just a man, one that you never exchanged many words with, yet he managed to make you feel all sorts of ways. Was it possible that Anastacha was right? That he really did like you?

“I bet you like him, too.”

You glared at her. You did not need Anastacha spreading rumors about how you were in love with the milkman, however true that may be.

“No, I don’t. Focus.” You pointed the pencil back at her homework. “Now, in order to find x, you have to subtract . . . . . .”

Taglist: @Meetmeatyourworst @hanawrites404 @Emimurphy2008

[reysdriver]

Exit Stage Right | R.L

You and your daughter miss Remus while he's performing for a stadium of fans, so much that you have to see him before the concert is over — dad!rockstar!remus x mom!reader fluff

warnings: a little angsty if you squint rlly hard, but nothing else

words: 2.4k

a/n: I promised rockstar!remus a while ago, but I've been to 2 concerts in the last 2 weeks, which just so happens to be finals season, so I've been simultaneously busy as hell and itching to write this. I hope you like how it turned out!

Your daughter Olive was no stranger to loud noises. 

Remus had a room to practise drumming in your house, it’s normal to encounter a chaotic mess of fans and paparazzi when you left the house as a family, and she just about had the loudest uncles in the world. Though you tried to limit the amount of noise she took in, Olive’s little ears had definitely adapted to her hectic little life. 

But all that noise in her daily life was no match for a rock concert in a sold-out stadium. Those decibel levels would for sure be far too high for her little ears to handle.

It wasn’t as easy of a decision on what you should do with her tonight, though. You were getting cabin fever with all the identical hotel rooms you’ve been living in while The Marauders were on their tour, and you suspected Olive was in the same boat. 

So, you decided to go back to the old days when the band first started going on long tours, when you would stay in the dressing room for the length of the performance. You and Remus figured it would be soundproof enough backstage, but you still insisted on pulling out the baby headphones you had bought just in case before she was even born. You were only planning on using them if it got especially loud backstage, yet you tried them on anyway. 

They were massive on her, but they kept her safe and happy. Plus, she was pretty damn adorable with them on—not that she wasn’t all the time, but definitely cuter than normal with those giant headphones. 

Waiting for the show to start, Remus bounced Olive on his lap while you watched the rest of the guys run through their current individual pre-show rituals. 

It had been quite a while since you’ve been backstage with the band right before a show, and you honestly forgot how entertaining it was. 

James was trying to solve the same Rubik’s cube he’s been working on for years to warm up his fingers, Peter was doing the daily crossword in the local newspaper, and Sirius was trying to multitask by doing his vocal warmups and his makeup at the same time. 

It was really a terrible combination of tasks, as Sirius kept on messing up his eyeliner and then trying to suppress his favourite swear words for your daughter’s sake. 

You wanted to tell him off, but it was really too fun to watch for you to intervene.

A minute or so after Sirius finally finished his look, the boys’ manager knocked on the dressing room door and reminded them that they have to go on stage soon. 

Remus thanked him, and the guys all started getting ready to go. He kept Olive in his arms for as long as he could, until it was just the three of you in the room after everyone was already headed to the stage. 

When he finally had to let her go, Remus made sure he gave you both a proper goodbye. 

“I’ll be back soon. Just over 2 hours, then we can all go home.” He kissed you softly, but deeply. He always does this as a way of saying goodbye, kissing you like he might never do it again, but he doesn’t want you to think about it. 

When his lips left yours and he slouched down to blow a raspberry on Olive’s tummy, you sighed quietly. “A hotel, not home.” 

He looked at you sympathetically as he collected his drumsticks from the table beside you and stored them in his back pocket for the time being. 

“Isn’t home anywhere where we’re all together?” He said, trying to lift your spirits. “But we’ll be home home soon enough. And I won’t be on tour again for a while, and we can be all together as much as we want.”

That did make you feel better. Even though you loved that Remus was living his dream with his best friends and giving you and Olive a great life, it did get stressful from time to time. 

Privacy violations by paparazzi and media outlets, insecurity that sometimes got the best of you on both sides of the relationship, and of course, The Marauders going on world tours that were fun, but still somewhat torture. They made it so you had to choose between leaving home for months, or being away from Remus—not that there was any difference between those two. 

You didn’t want to get emotional right when Remus had to go perform, so you smiled and reminded him that it was time for you to part ways for the evening. 

“They’re waiting for you out there.” 

A grin graced your husband’s face. “They can wait a little longer.” 

“They paid to see you.” You reminded him. 

“And I'll personally refund all of them if I don't go out.” 

“Then we'll be out of money, and we'll both have to get new jobs and we'll never have any time with just the three of us.”

Remus pretended to think over your point for a second. “You’re right. I guess I have to go out and perform, then.”

“Put on a good show, honey. We'll see you soon.” 

While saying goodbye to him, you raised Olive’s arm so you could wave at Remus for her as he walked out of the dressing room. Her face was already forming a pout when she watched her dad leave to go do his job, but you wouldn’t let that morph into anything more. 

You turned her around so you could both look at each other, then you pressed a kiss to her chubby cheek.

“None of that, sweetheart. We’ll see him again in no time.” 

Laying her down beside you on the couch, you reach down into the baby bag you never go anywhere without and pick out some of her favourite toys from their specific pocket; hopefully those will keep her distracted and happy. 

◆◇◆◇◆

The toys didn’t work as well as you thought they would. They kept Olive busy for about an hour, but she seemed to snap out of her happy baby daze out of nowhere. 

She started crying and nothing was working to calm her down. She wasn’t hungry, she didn’t need to be changed, and nothing you had brought for this very reason was working. 

You knew the only thing that could quell her upset was outside and on the stage, playing drums for a stadium of fans. But even though she and Remus both wished they could spend all hours of the day together, you just didn’t know how that could work.  

And then you remembered the headphones. 

The sound backstage hadn’t been that loud at all while The Marauders were playing, so you honestly hadn’t thought about them since you and Remus packed them before you left the hotel. 

But this could work. You could use them to help both you and Olive right now. So that’s what you did.

You dug through your bag and pulled the noise-cancelling headphones from the bottom of the bag, where they had sat untouched for the longest time. After picking them up with a tiny ‘aha’, you smiled at your daughter and told her that she would soon be seeing her dad. 

She had calmed down somewhat due to the mere mention of Remus, but she was still wailing in your arms. You bounced her lightly while you walked down the halls of the stadium. 

“It’s okay, honey.” You cooed at Olive, despite the fact that she couldn’t hear a thing. “You’re gonna tire yourself out and fall asleep before you even get to see Daddy. We don’t want that, do we?”

Although, maybe her crying herself to sleep wouldn’t be so bad. 

It still wasn’t an option in your mind. Your daughter wanted to see her dad, so over to Remus you’ll go. 

Once you got to the stage door, a burly security guard gave you a questioning look. You supposed he wasn’t used to a woman and a baby wanting to go into the wings during a rock concert. But he was just there to do his job, not judge, so he let you through when you showed him your ID. 

You kept checking Olive’s face to see her expressions and gauge if everything was too loud for her. Her look didn’t deviate from the bothered expression her face took on when you started walking with her, so you assumed the headphones were cancelling out the noise, just as they were made for. 

Nobody who was working backstage seemed to mind you being there, so you found an extra stool in a dark corner and pulled it so you could sit and watch the band. 

Based just on how Olive was moving in your arms, you knew she had spotted her dad behind the cymbals he was smashing across the stage. Pointing towards Remus, you whispered to her again even though she couldn’t hear you. “Look! Who’s that? Who’s over there?”

She seemed to be cheered up enough just from seeing Remus, so your hypothesis was proven correct. Things were shaping up to be a good night. 

You swayed and headbanged—as lightly as possible—since just because Olive couldn’t enjoy the loud music doesn’t mean you had to ignore it too. 

The current song ended, and James was talking to the crowd while Sirius drank some much-needed water after all that singing. While taking a swig, the two familiar faces in the wings of the stage caught his eye, and he just had to share what he was seeing with the drummer. 

He practically skipped over to Remus, who was also catching his breath from performing and pointed you out. Your husband’s eyes scanned the area until he found you, and his face immediately broke out into a smile—and so did your daughter’s. 

Back in the dressing room, you were hesitant if you should leave at all or if you should just wait out Olive’s tantrum, but the matching looks on your husband and daughter’s faces right now was proof that you made the right decision. 

Olive made grabby hands towards her dad across the stage, and Remus waved right back and blew a kiss in your direction. You weren’t quite sure if it was aimed at you or your little girl, but it made you blush either way. 

He pointed to the setlist taped to the ground beside him and hid his hand behind his bass drum so the audience wouldn’t see his gesture; he held up three fingers to let you know there would be three more songs until he could get up and give you two his full attention. You knew they would most definitely be doing an encore after they finished, but at least they could all have a small break after the main show.  

You nodded to show him you understood, but his attention was already grabbed back by James giving him the sign that it was time to get back into the music. Not even taking more than a second to prepare, Remus was back in the groove and started playing the next song on the list, effortlessly and perfectly. 

The last few songs of the main set were some of your favourites from the band’s discography, but you had to admit that you couldn’t enjoy them as much as you usually would. 

It was mainly because you were somewhat scared of an impending mood swing out of your daughter now that her father’s attention had left her, but also because these three songs were standing in between you and your husband like a brick wall right now. You just had to remind yourself that once they hit that last note and said their goodbyes to the crowd, that wall would be temporarily smashed once more. 

But now, they were at the end of the concert. The crowd was cheering like they just had the best night of their lives—you don’t doubt that they did—and Remus was throwing his sticks into the sea of hands desperate for a morsel of The Marauders. 

His rockstar persona was dropped the second those drumsticks left his hands, and he was rushing to the wings to be with you and Olive, a wide smile strung across his cheeks.

 He pulled you two out into the hall so the crowd’s noise could be in the background. He knew they would be cheering for an encore in a minute; as much as he loved that sound, he would rather hear you. 

“She was getting pretty fussy and I knew you were the only thing that would calm her down.” You explained to Remus before he could even ask. 

You were afraid he would be upset with you bringing her outside of the dressing room, but he didn’t seem fazed at all. He gently took Olive from your arms and cooed over her. 

“You missed me so much you dragged your mum out here so you could see me, huh?” Remus asked her. “You know I missed you too, princess. Both of you.”

“Yeah? Maybe you should get the guys to shorten the setlist so you aren’t away from us for too long, then.”

He didn’t respond, but you know that he had brought up the idea of shorter tours to the others now that he and James were both fathers. 

You watched lovingly as Remus kept moving Olive’s hand away from the glitter on his face that she was so desirous to touch. You wished you all could stay in this moment forever, but the audience’s chants for an encore were getting louder and louder and you knew the scene in front of you couldn’t last much longer. 

Right on schedule, James strutted up and tapped Remus on the shoulder with a brand new pair of drumsticks. 

“We’ve gotta go back out there, mate. Time to part ways with your girls once again.”

Remus wouldn’t put up a fight. He handed Olive back to you and blew one more kiss at you two as a goodbye.

The doors opened and a cacophony of fan cheers hit your ears. It was a lot, but it just reminded you that all those people were waiting for your husband, so you could wait a few more minutes. 

Just two final songs, then you could all go home.

[scarfacemarston]

Could you maybe probably sort of kind of pretty please with a cherry on top write a Natasha x reader? Wlw preferred but nbreader is cool too. Maybe like a prank fic? I love pranks so much they bring so much serotonin into my veins 💋💋💋

Natasha x F! Reader prank people

Warnings: LOTS of cussing from Rumlow because that's just the type of guy he is. Takes place before the Hydra reveal. You loved a lot of things about Natasha. Who wouldn’t love the woman? You were the luckiest gal in the world to call her your partner. You loved how many layers she had to her and felt honored to see the softer, more playful side of her. Not many people knew that she had a penchant for pranks. It was quite simple for her to play pranks on people and let chaos reign because no one ever suspected it was the severe and stoic Black Widow.

Sometimes, she would prank people and give the most mischievous and playful smile -reserved only for you.

Well, there came a time when you wanted to join in. After all, it was a fun new way for you two to bond as a couple. Natasha quirked an eyebrow at your request but accepted it anyway.

Some of her favorite targets included Isaac Murphy, Brock Rumlow, and the IT guy from the 7th floor of the Shield Headquarters.

“You remember that I like to play the long game here, right? No salt in the sugar container or pie in the face antics. That’s child’s play. No, I want them to be either very confused, suffering or both. You can handle that, can’t you?” Natasha said with a quick of her lips. You scoffed.

“Of course I can! I have some ideas of my own, you know.” You defended yourself. Natasha crossed her arms. “Well this I have to hear.” “Well, I hate Brock Rumlow, too. I have a simple, but obnoxious prank on him, but he might tear up the room.” You warned.

“Hm, if it’s too awful, I’ll have to hear his loud mouth whining about it. Save your best idea for him to make it worth it.” Natasha thought aloud.

“Okay, will do. This Murphy guy, you have his email and number, right? Why not sign him up for the most famous mega church we can find? Joel Olsteen or Kenneth Copland, like that!.”

“He’s suspicious. I’m not sure what is off about him, but I will find out. But, not a bad idea, but I think we can do worse.”

“I’m getting there! What about various political campaigners? We could do Obama, Romney, Kennedy and even more local politicians. I receive those emails and texts daily despite donating to a Green Party campaign six years ago. That’s just one! Imagine how horrible three or more would be!” You enthused.

Natasha grinned. “Not bad, but I really want him to suffer.” “I was thinking we could give his name to various military recruiters? ” You suggested. “I’ll suggest his name to a multi-level marketing group so they can try to recruit him, too. Not bad for your first prank.” Nat said, hugging you from behind. “I think we can do even better.” Nat muttered in your ear.

“Okay, for Rumlow - I was thinking we trick him into thinking there’s somebody who takes his desk during the night shift. Uses his chair, desk, everything.” You said, a grin curling on your features. “Hm, sounds promising. Go on” She murmured. “Well, I was thinking we move his stuff around every day before he comes in. Maybe lay a crossword puzzle or newspapers scattered in the morning that look read? Move his pens, and everything else!” You laughed. Natasha nodded in approval. I think we should leave half-eaten bags of chips, half-drunk water bottles, and candy wrappers so he thinks someone has been eating there. That will get him. He’s quite possessive with his stuff.” Nat suggested. You gasped. “Oh, he’s going to hate that.” “Yep. And to end it up, we can have multiple files on his computer that look like they’re from Murphy, Jack Rollins and Sitwell. All of them sometimes work the night shifts.” Nat laughed as she turned to face you. ‘Imagine the fights!”

“I’ll be sure to tape them, don’t you worry, love,” Natasha said, tapping your nose.

It wasn’t long until Natasha invited you to have lunch with her at a SHIELD gathering. It was a relaxed affair where nothing intelligence-related was discussed. A few other SHIELD members invited their partners or children as well.

Natasha smirked as she took her seat next to you and placed a plate of sandwiches and milkshakes on the table for you to share.

“Might as well have something to eat while we enjoy the show. Murphy looks like he’s going to have a mental breakdown. His phone has been going off all day to the point that Rumlow threatened to break it, and Maria Hill threatened to take disciplinary action."

At that moment, you heard the buzz of a cellphone receiving a notification…and another…and another.

“They won’t leave me alone!” Murphy whined.

“Shut that damn phone up, or I’m smashing it. I don’t give a fuck about any “disciplinary action.”

“It’s the number, you idiot. Not the phone!” Murphy said, raising his voice.

“Then change the fucking number!” Rumlow raised his voice.

“I can’t! I have too many accounts associated with it! I’d have to start all over!” Murphy whined.

Rollins tromped over, glaring at Murphy. “

All of us are plotting your death, Murphy.” Rollins snapped as he pulled Rumlow by the shoulder away.

“Come on, let’s get you a beer.” Rollins muttered.

“I need more than a damn beer,” Rumlow muttered, stomping off. Soon, the noise was annoying, even the two of you.

Finally, Maria Hill herself made her way over, snatching the phone from Murphy’s hand. “You’re on thin ice, kid,” Hill said, pointing at his face.

Murphy sat, slumping into his chair. “It’s not my fault!” he whined.

You and Natasha exchanged looks as you slipped on your milkshake, stealing one of Natasha’s fries.

“I have to admit, I was close to breaking his phone myself.” Nat admitted.

“Yeah, this might have backfired on us.”

“But it is great to see them at each other’s throats. It distracts them from bothering Steve and I,” Natasha said, stopping your hand from stealing another fry.

“I could have bought you fries, you know.” Nat laughed.

“But I so enjoy stealing yours!” You smiled.

~~~~~ A week later, you received a text from Natasha. “Calling you in a second. Need you to hear this. Need to be silent, though.” “Ok” And with that, your phone began to ring. You picked up immediately only to hear shouting and cursing in the background…from a very familiar voice. It was most certainly Rumlow who had become fed up with the idea of someone “stealing his shit in his space.”

“If I find out which piece of shit is using my desk, I’m going to dismember them! Slowly!” Rumlow bellowed.

You heard a second voice. “No one sits there! Calm down there, alpha male. It’s your space.” Rollins snarked.

“Then where the fuck is this shit coming from? You work the night shift! Why are there files from you, Murphy and Sitwell? “ he shouted.

“Yeah, Over there. That’s how I know no one sits there. I don't know how they got that, Rumlow. I didn't do it." Rollins defended.

“Where did this come from? Or this?” - the sound of objects being thrown came through the phone.”

“Fine, ask Murphy!”

You hear another voice in the background.

“That asshole is on thin ice. If it’s him, good luck finding the body.” Rumlow growled.

“It wasn’t me! I quit working nights last month!” Murphy squeaked.

“That leaves Sitwell, then.” You heard Rollins speak up.

You heard Rumlow growl. “Damn it. That nerd is higher on the ladder than we are…but how about we pay the dweeb a visit anyway?” You heard Rumlow’s voice fade in the background.

You heard Natasha’s voice. “I hope you’re proud of yourself and the chaos you caused,” Nat said, snickering.

“Oh, so proud! I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this, though.” You apologized.

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. I can handle a few mens’ fragile egos and I can drown them out pretty well. I have to say, you impressed me with your pranks. I might need to watch out…but just know that any pranks you play on me, I’ll get you back with a vengence.” Nat warned.

“….. okay, then it will only be fun ones then! A surprise room of puppies, or baklava randomly appearing in places.” You appeased. Nat gave one of her rare laughs.

“I can live with that. Let’s give the boys a break for now, but we are definitely going to prank them again. Maybe we’ll go after new targets. I have to go. Dinner at Demo’s tonight, same time as usual?”

“Wouldn’t miss it. Love you, Tasha.”

“Love you, Y/N”.

[lunaekalenda]

warnings: mention of the word "kidnapper", mention of guns, suggestive (?) it's just crack tbh, i'll make proper fluff and a proper fic later! btw this cute separator is from @animatedglittergraphics-n-more so thank uuu <3

your workmate entered your office quickly, closing behind her with a strong and loud bang that made you take your eyes up from the documents you were reading. a pearl of sweat was sliding down her forehead and she seemed shocked. you stood up quickly and she took your shoulders, shaking you by them.

"all good? what happens? are you alright?" you ask her, but she's still catching air when she talks.

"gun. a gun. there's a-a guy with a gun, and he's waiting for you, you have to hide. we already called the cops, so there's no ne-"

you release yourself from her grip before getting close to the window near your chair, looking to the parking lot, were your boyfriend rests against his car, while he cleans his gun with a pink glasses cloth you lended him this morning when he dropped you to work.

"cops won't be necessary, it's just my partner." your workmate looks at you with surprise, before giving a look to were he is. Sylus takes his gaze up and finds you, before waving his fingers towards you. you answer his movement by copying him. "see?"

your friend nods energetically before speaking. "i thought it was way too strange for him to enter and be polite and patient while holding a gun. it didn't fit with the kidnapper trope." her curious eyes follow you around while you put all your stuff in the bag. you smile shyly to her, before opening the door.

"thanks for the concern, but it won't be necessary from now on. he's just... an agent. that's why he has a gun, yeah, totally legal. don't worry a ton about it." you leave quickly in direction to the parking lot, where he's still in the exact same position. as soon as he sees you, he slides the gun inside its case on his belt, before taking your hips automatically when you're close enough. his lips catch yours on a welcoming kiss.

"really, i love that you're more free now and i really appreciate that you wanna drop me and pick me up from work but, could you avoid taking... that out?"

Sylus looks at his belt with his red eyes glowing in fun. he raises a brow in your direction.

"didn't knew accounting made you that horny, sweetie. though, you never told me you were into that public thing." you feel your cheeks heating up and he giggles, pecking your lips again before opening the car door for you to sit, taking your shoulder strap and putting it on the backseats. he sits on the driver's seat and ties your seatbelt. he starts to drive, humming softly the song that plays.

"no, but really, avoid taking the gun outside in public. not everyone is used to them here." he nods a couple times, his hand sliding over the steering wheel so smoothly you find yourself staring at it. he takes his free hand to your thigh, squeezing it softly.

"i promise i won't. i was just making time, i'm not used to wait for someone out of work. a work with a schedule i don't control, of course." you laugh at his words and he turns left towards home. "though, you had to see her face when she saw the gun on the belt, i thought she was gonna faint in place."

"Sylus..." you sigh. he giggles again.

"sorry, love, sorry." he passes his tongue over his lips. "next time, i'll just bring a crossword book for the meantime, yes?"

"good." he parks masterfully before powering off the car. he unties your seatbelt before leaving, opening the door for you and taking both yours and his things. your hand is the next thing he holds as soon as he's next to you. you walk together towards your apartment. he speaks on the elevator, a malicious grin appearing on his lips.

"tell your friend i'm sorry for the gun. and that it will probably happen again."

[otomehonyaku]

DIABOLIK LOVERS Grand Edition ☽ Genteiban Special Booklet Translation ☽ Diaboy Q&A 4 (Azusa)

Original title: DIABOLIK LOVERS Grand Edition 限定版スペシャルブックレット English translation by @otomehonyaku Click here for the scans (thank you to @karleksmumskladdkaka for providing the scans!)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The special booklet included with the limited version of Grand Edition (for the Switch) contains a Q&A section in which the Diaboys ask each other questions and discuss their answers. They're divided into 10 discussions, so I'll divvy up my translations accordingly. The fourth question was asked by Azusa. Have fun reading!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

QUESTION 4. Tell me about something good that happened recently. (Azusa)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Ruki: Something good that happened recently… I found the bookmark I thought I’d lost in a book I read many years ago.

Ayato: That’s way too insignificant! I have something much bigger. Much better. Hehe.

Shuu: You now know a good new place for takoyaki. That’s it, right?

Ayato: Half-hearted guess, Shuu. Rather than a restaurant, I came up with a way to make delicious takoyaki myself!

Azusa: That’s… just like Ayato…

Kou: Let’s see… I recently made a promise to go out together with our Masochistic Kitten!

Kanato: You look like you deign to think you’re the only important thing in her life. She recently gave me handmade sweets, so don’t be so conceited.

Subaru: [absent-mindedly] I… recently got a cushion from her to use in my coffin.

Yuma: What, are all y’all that caught up in her? I was pretty happy that the tomatoes from my vegetable garden turned out well.

Reiji: As for me, I recently purchased a new Meissen (1) cup and saucer.

Shuu: [sigh] …What’s so fun about getting more tableware? 

Laito: It’s his raison d’être, so it can’t be helped. By the way, I recently got a macaron as a prize in a crossword puzzle contest. How about you, Shuu?

Shuu: If I have to choose something, I’d say the fact that I probably won’t have to repeat this school year… I’d hate to go through all that shit again (2).

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

(1) Meissen is a town in Germany famous for its porcelain. (2) He says 北極送りは二度とごめんだ, which literally translates to “I don’t want to be sent to the North Pole again.”

[beatboxing-puppy]

saw some posts on this website discussing what sort of videogames the dunmeshi characters would play and i think everyone is wrong. everyone is wrong except for me so im going to spell out exactly who plays what. putting it under a read more because im going on a damn tangent.

Laios: He's not a gamer he does not play games on purpose he will only ever play video games when his friends ask him to join them in their multiplayer things. One day tho Falin told him about Monster Hunter and now thats the only thing he plays aside from Spore and he has sunk countless hours into that damn game. Also he probably has played Some pokemon but he doesnt like PLAYING it he just likes it in concept he knows the name of all the pokemon

marcille: people keep saying she would be a cosy gamer playing animal crossing and stardew and other cute games ^-^ its so lalalaaaa NO!!!!!!! no she does not. Marcille plays games that stress her out on purpose marcille plays overwhelming micromanagey games like lobotomy corporation and rimworld and etc. She also likes games with deep lore and mysteries to discover. The only thing that doesn't fit in this category that she plays is Minecraft shes always in there CREATIVE MODE building virtual dungeons and other crazy shit. Also she plays on her work laptop with trackpad ok

Chilchuck: This one is for me. This one im just basing off my own dad ok. Chilchuck used to be a hardcore gamer in his youth but specifically he was playing stuff like world of warcraft and old school runescape he had really big setups so he could run several instances of the game at once on all his alt accounts so he could beat a boss by himself and he was really good at it. But then he had kids and didnt have time for this sort of thing so he stopped playing videogames aside from occasionally helping his daughters beat a super hard mario level. Later in life he probably discovered some shitty little low-commitment phone game like pokemon go or pikmin bloom or some daily sudoku puzzle thing and he plays it every day but its not that big a deal. He has been pressured by his friends and daughters to make a roblox account but he hasnt played it at all.

Senshi: THIS guy is the one that plays animal crossing. He logs in when he can but hes not on that every day grind. Also he doesnt play the newest one he doesnt play horizons he plays one of the DS ones. Wild world probably. He either doesn't like or doesn't know about the nintendo switch. Whenever one of his villagers say that they want to leave he'll nod solemnly and say smth like "Well... I suppose it'd be selfish to ask ye to stay, friend... Just promise me you'll stay safe and never forget me... Go and explore the world. Wish ye the best." Plus his island would be covered in weeds. He also has some mobile games he enjoys angry birds and candy crush and crosswords (gotta keep the brain in shape!) but other than that he doesn't videogame much because he prefers board games and tabletop stuff he isnt too jazzed about all this modern technology plus a console or a laptop and all that gaming equipment is a lot to lug around and hes a nomad he would NOT have that shit

Falin: Now FALIN is the cosy gamer. kind of. Falin plays animal crossing new horizons sometimes and has fun making a bad island on purpose. Very mildly "bad" tho the worst she'll do is use the drawing feature to hide a giant penis on the beach or whatever. Or she'll give her villagers silly outfits. She also plays minecraft (either skyblock or she makes a new world and explores and builds a couple houses and then forgets about it and makes another new world) and roblox (likes 'trolling' strangers by dressing up funny and acting kind of strange in roleplay servers but she's never actually mean or anything.) But the big thing she likes is story-driven indie rpgmaker games. She's the person who will say shit like "Yeah I played Blums Booglies the quest for Big Dinners and it was so good I cried for 9 hours" completely unironically.

kabru: social gamer like laios but the games he plays on purpose are the sims (he likes to cause them problems) and online multiplayer games (he likes to peoplewatch). I can also see him doing absurd and tortrous challenge runs of games like No items no pokecenter one type hardcore nuzlockes. im correct

izutsumi: ACTUALLY trolls people on roblox. And she plays needlessly gory flash games. Maybe she calls people dumbfucks over valorant voice chat sometimes

[rottenpumpkin13]

I'm curious, what do you think was the WORST injury Zack had and SOMEHOW got away with it? You can go Hurt/No Comfort if you want we're all collective masochists in the end

Have it your way >:^) - also this took so long because I wrote a version that was not a fun read for the Zack enjoyers and had to tone it down asdfghjk

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

He vaguely recalled reading an article about comatose patients: how their consciousness, though unresponsive, remained active—suspended in void between life and death, poised to be drawn toward one or the other. Comas were like waiting rooms, and he almost wished he had something to occupy his mind—a magazine, a comic book, even a crossword puzzle, despite his usual disdain for them; anything to drown out the voices that began at precisely 4 PM each day.

Angeal was always the first to arrive, the squeak of his boots unmistakable against the polished hospital floor. He would listen intently as the supervising nurse provided updates on the condition—“No significant changes in his neurological status, the expected timeframe for him regaining consciousness remains uncertain.” But Angeal's positivity never wavered. "He will," he would insist, bless his ignorance, "Zack's strong.. He'll pull through this, I know he will."

In the first week, Zack wanted to shout, “Hell yeah I am! Watch, Angeal, I’ll be out of here in no time!” By the third week, it was as if he’d lost his voice—both literally and metaphorically. Zack prided himself on his perseverance, as if he were born with sunny-tinted glasses that allowed him to pull through everything without a fight.

Scraped knees as a child became cool battle wounds in his childhood; timeouts transformed into prisons the warrior he pretended to be had to escape; and the vegetables his mother forced him to eat were poison he had to avoid at all costs. Naturally, the waiting room analogy was what he clung to in order to stay sane.

Next came Sephiroth, heralded by the unmistakable clatter of his shoulder guards—a sound Zack likened to a cat bell, one he’d be sure to tease Sephiroth about when he woke up. Sephiroth never asked the nurse for updates; Angeal must have already filled him in. Instead, he would walk silently over to the bed, place a hand gently on Zack’s forehead, and whisper softly: “I miss you. Get well soon,” before carefully adjusting his blankets, making sure Zack was comfortable.

Inside, Zack was desperately screaming, "I will, I promise!" but Sephiroth couldn't hear him. By the fourth week, the harder Zack tried to scream, the further he felt from reality.

Then came Genesis, his presence inundating the room. He spoke to Zack as if he were awake, greeting him with a cheerful, "Good evening, Puppy," and proudly asking, "What do you think of my new coat?" Zack wished he would never stop talking. Genesis would then sit beside him and read aloud from Loveless. Zack suspected it was Genesis’ version of a prayer, and for that, he didn't mind at all.

And then there was Cloud. Zack's longing to scream out surged whenever he caught the meek shuffle of Cloud's boots, followed by the faint squeak of him thanking the nurse before entering. Cloud would meticulously style Zack's hair, crafting his signature spikes with care, as if determined to preserve Zack's essence even in his incapacitated state. His touch was gentle as he spoke to Zack as though he were awake and listening intently. Cloud would vent about his rowdy squad mates, grumble about his stern commanding officer, and lament the monotony of patrol missions where he strived to do his best

And then came the most difficult confession.

"I'm gonna stop trying out for SOLDIER," Cloud admitted one day, his voice soft as he tended to the flowers by Zack's bedside. "Tryouts are approaching, but… it just wouldn't feel right without you. Not that I'm all that confident I'd make it anyway, but I can't bring myself to do it without you here."

If Cloud could glimpse inside Zack's mind, he'd hear him screaming.

He was so helpless, trapped inside that cage, that body that wouldn't just WAKE UP. He needed to get up, he needed to be there for Cloud, and for Angeal who wasted so much time training him, and for Genesis who was finally starting to warm up to him, and for Sephiroth, who’s friendship he valued so much.

But it was useless.

He wanted to give up.

So he did.

He caved, and let the darkness take him.

But it rejected Zack. As much as death teased and loved to embrace him, it eventually always spat him out again. And maybe that was Zack Fair’s curse, cemented when his eyes fluttered open one morning.

Hovering above him was the unmistakable silhouette of a SOLDIER. With great effort, he lifted his heavy eyelids, only to find Kunsel standing before him, his appearance clearly older than the last time he had seen him. Zack should have noticed the calendar hanging on the wall, its numbers spelling out the year "0007."

Yet, instead of acknowledging the date, Zack's trembling voice broke through the silence. He questioned Kunsel, struggling with each word. He asked about Angeal, Cloud, Sephiroth, and Genesis.

Kunsel looked grim before replying.

“There was a mass desertion at SOLDIER years ago.”

[foamangel]

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ gingerbread tea | spencer reid - drabble

— word count: 576

summary: Cozy moments spent with Reid has he takes care of your cold.

⤷ spencer reid x gn!reader

a.n: just fluff to cheer you all up in this cold days. tell me your thoughts down below and don't forget to like and reblog! :))

warnings ! - none, sickness but its just a common cold haha.

“Name of a Greek philosopher starting with an H.” you yelled over your shoulder “ten letters.” you finished with a huff, scrambling your head for the gosh darn name.

Reid sneaked behind you “Heraclitus.” he whispered near your head, setting down a cup of gingerbread tea in the coffee table in front of you, his hand petting your hair has he passed.

“You know doing the crosswords is no fun when you know everything so fast,” you started, reaching for the warm stemming cup in front of you “it should take time, pondering, musing even -” your aimless ramble was interrupted by a fit of heavy coughs and Spencer sighed, sitting next to you on the soft brown couch and taking your temperature with his hand.

“Has anybody ever told you that you talk to much?” he asked with a soft, small smile on his face that made the conner of his eyes ever so slightly wrinkle.

“Well, just about anybody who has ever had the pleasure to have known me.” you cheekily replied, mumbling due to the strain on your sore throat, flipping your eyes across the crosswords journal page.  

“You should be resting,” he moved the crossword away, siting closer to you “otherwise you will never get better.” his voice was warm, filled with a worry that made your heart melt.

“Ah you are such a sucker for rules agent! If that’s the case you should not be sitting this close to me – up now, go away, you can’t risk getting sick, if that happened Hotch would come in here and surely do the job of killing me, something this mere common cold cannot do.”

He laughed, getting even closer, his nose bumping into yours “I don’t mind sacrificing my health if that means you will be well taken care of sweetheart, and you don’t need to worry about Hotch, he might seem mean and grumpy but that is all just for show.”

“Besides,” he tackled you, making you both lay on the couch, you laughed, looking up at him has he continued speaking “I could use a few vacation days, especially if they are spent with you.”

Giggling you buried your face into his neck, his cold skin soothing your feverish body “I think I like that vacation idea – you getting sick to achieve it not so much mister, you got to stay healthy and strong to catch all of those bad guys!” you said humorously, gazing into his eyes fondly.

He laughed - the sound of it made you melt, even after all this time you could feel butterflies in your stomach – and stroked your cheek, flush due to the fever and his proximity.

“Alright now, you keep getting warmer, its time for you to really take a nap.” you huffed at his words mumbling a soft “no” as he picked you up out of the couch and took you in to his arms, down the softly lit hallway.

He looked down, his brown eyes firm and safe “Don’t worry, I will be there when you wake up.” - sometimes you forgot he was a truly amazing profiler, a young prodigy that could read you and your emotions better than anyone, sometimes even better than you yourself.

“Promise?” you said, groggy with sleep, eyes fluttering shut.

“Promise.” he replied, covering you with the soft bedroom duvet, laying next to you and kissing your forehead – his arm wrapping around your body with tenderness and care.

[immeasurablesaladagere]

Your fics are keeping me very well fed. May I pretty please request a little!house fic where house is regressing at work but trying to hide it and one of the ducklings rats him out to cg!cuddy or cg!wilson?

Your works are amazing <33333

Middle!Regressor House for the soul. He would be the sassiest, most back-talking pre-teen you ever did see.

-----

Word Count: 990

Summery: House has regressed in the middle of a DDX, and after rushing the ducklings out of his hair so they can't bring it up, is bored out of his skull. Then, someone rats him to Cuddy.

-----

House capped the whiteboard marker. “Okay! Chase, recheck the bloodwork, Cameron and Foreman, run a chest MRI and a stress-test before Mr. State-Track-Champion’s heart explodes.” 

For a second none of the fellows moved a muscle, just staring at him with dumb looks on their faces. 

“Am I speaking Spanish? Go!” He snapped, and finally they got up and left him alone before they could voice any of the ideas he could see on their goody-two-shoes faces.

He let out a long sigh and trudged to his office. He grabbed his tennis ball, flopped down into his chair, and began to precariously balance the ball on his finger. He’d been trying to learn how to spin it like a basketball, but it still wouldn’t stay on his finger for more than a few seconds. The ball didn’t seem to want to cooperate any more today than it did the day before, and after a couple minutes he gave up and resorted to bouncing it off of the wall instead.

Why did Cuddy have to take away his Gameboy? It wasn’t even like he was ignoring a patient to play! He was waiting for his next appointment to show up and she took it because he was being “unprofessional” or whatever. 

Maybe Cuddy would give it back if she knew he was only twelve years old. He snickered to himself. She’d be so embarrassed if he killed someone because he was bored. But he knew he couldn’t do that.He wasn’t stupid enough to work on the patient when he was regressed, even if he was bored out of his mind.

Anything they had in the office in case of regression emergencies didn’t look any fun, either. He was too old for the colouring pages and children’s books, and too young for Chase’s dumb crosswords and sudoku puzzles, which meant all he was left with was the ball. He felt like one of those sad tigers in zoos with no enrichment toys. 

He wasn’t sure why his brain had picked today of all days to regress. The case wasn’t very hard and he wasn’t in any more pain than he usually was,but at some point during the DDX his adult mind turned to TV static and decided to abandon him to his own devices. Chase, Cameron, and Foreman had all noticed that something was up, but they didn’t say anything. Good, he thought, the last thing he needed were for his employees thinking he needed to be babysat.

There was a knock on his office door, and he had to resist the urge to groan and slide out of his chair at the sight of Cuddy walking in.

“House?”

“Doctor Cuddy!” He greeted, “To what do I owe the pleasure? Is a PEDS patient missing their balloon? It wasn’t me, I promise!”

She crossed her arms and gave him a patented Cuddy-Stare. “One of your fellows told me that you were regressed during a diagnostic meeting.”

House deflated. Those snitches. “Which one?”

“So they were right?” She asked incredulously, “House, you can’t be working if you’re regressed, it’s not safe.”

“Meh-meh-meh, it’s not safe!” He mocked, “I know. I’m not working on the patient right now, I made them do it.” Even if he’d rather be doing anything but sitting in his lame office. He was being responsible for once! Couldn’t she see that?

Cuddy shook her head. “But you’re still working on the diagnosis. What if you missed something, or forgot a possibility?”

“Technically that could happen at any time.” He pointed out.

“You know what I mean. How old even are you right now?”

“Twelve. So I don’t need to be babysat, if that’s what you’re wondering.” He prayed to whatever god above that she didn’t decide he needed ‘parental supervision’ all day.

She let out a long, exasperated sigh. “Okay… That’s not the worst but,” Don’t say it, “I’d still like you to stay with me until you’re an adult again, just so I know you won’t try to go back to work.” 

Damn it. “But Cuddyyyy…” He whined dramatically.

“Exactly. You’re twelve, which means you’re old enough to understand that this is a liability.”

Staying with Cuddy meant that now he’d have to be bored in her stupid office, and now she’d be breathing down his neck the whole time. “But I’ll die of lame-disease if I have to be around you! You’re already in the final stages, I won’t stand a chance!”

Cuddy smirked. “You’re a big boy now, I’m sure you’ll survive. Come on, let’s go.”

House trudged his feet every step of the trip down to Cuddy’s office, making sure to add at least an extra ten minutes to what should have been a five-minute walk. Once they finally got there his leg was burning, and he dropped into one of the chairs against the wall and popped two Vicodin. They tasted so gross without water. How did big-him do this all the time?

“How many did you just take?” Cuddy asked.

“Two, like it says on the bottle, Mom.” Taking more would make his leg hurt less, but he didn’t like the way the blurry feeling from too many pills mixed with the fuzzy feeling of being little. It made him feel unfocused and weird.

She raised a considering eyebrow. “…Oh. Alright. I’m just going to be answering emails,” She opened a drawer in her desk, “So to make sure you stay out of trouble, here.” 

His Gameboy! He took it eagerly and turned it on. “So, wait— You’re saying I get to skip work and play video games all day?”

She chuckled. “Until you’re big again, yes. Don’t get any ideas, I’m not going to let you do this whenever.”

He saluted her, already engrossed in a game of Super Mario Bros. “Yes, sir.”

Cuddy just shook her head and got to work.

Maybe she wasn't so lame after all.

[ghostherlig]

chapter 11 endnotes!!

some end notes and things (as promised 😌) in chronological order!! (under the cut for spoilers!! go read chapter 11 first!!)

the word choices in the crossword puzzle were intentional!! it's kind of johnny and taka's perception of each other, or things they like about each other-

"Succinctly, John kept all of his emotions right in his chest, and one day, he would die." this IS a john mulaney reference-- and also very true, john has trouble expressing his emotions

also a lot of john's inner monologue in this chapter is him kind of keeping his emotions to himself and being unsure how to express himself or if he thinks he even should-

kenshi also telling john that the only way for him to know what john is thinking or feeling is if john tells him, as opposed to taka in the previous chapter going into his head (with permission) and looking freely at john's thoughts and feelings- just a thing that shows how their sense of others autonomy differs between them

johnny's love language is acts of service and gift giving can you tell. can you tell that he loves to cook for his partners and that food is a big part of him expressing his love??

john being in a sweater was a heavy note in this chapter- i dont often describe what they're wearing and kind of leave it vague unless i think it's fun or important to the scene- but them all being in very comfy dressed down clothing was an intentional note bc it isnt often that any of them are ever in very comfy clothing like that.. so john being warm and cozy in a comfy sweater and sweats is a sign that he's comfortable, physically but also mentally and emotionally bc he's surrounded by people he trusts

almost everything taka does is intentional. he spends a lot of time thinking over his words/actions and whether or not they're appropriate, which often means that he misses a lot of the more comfortable windows in conversation- but also means that he often comes out of the gate with an intensity that others arent ready for- like when he barges into the kitchen/dining area and immediately asks if they've already had a conversation without him- and also why he immediately gives john and kenshi space to talk alone/without him

john and taka have known each other a long time and it was only recently that taka kind of went missing… but the little story about john first trying roasted green tea is that he had discovered it was taka's favorite at this little cafe place they met at and asked if he could try; taka, of course, obliged, despite knowing that john would most likely not like it very much.. and he was right. john made a face and set taka's cup back down before swallowing and reaching for his own cup of coffee. they laughed about it. but later, when taka just.. disappeared for a few years, john needed something to fill the little void there, and so he started make cups of roasted green tea. at first for the smell, but then he tried it again. and again. and again, and kept trying it until he had developed a taste for it. then he started drinking it for comfort on days when he needed it. little sweethearts <33

taka's nickname for johnny, koinu, means 'little dog' (or puppy) in japanese- taka based this off of his nickname for john and just decided that johnny got to be the smaller version bc… well… he is.

john having that breakdown and quite literally collapsing under the weight of his own emotions was a lot of his grief for sonya but also a lot of grief for himself- for the fact that he never had the chance to grief her properly in the first place. part of him still thinks if he had been given that time, that he may be better for it now, and he regrets his past decisions when it comes to that

taka's nickname for john, inu, means 'dog' in japanese, and it's a nickname he gave john back when they were just starting to work together- it was bc john had a lot of dog-like mannerisms and characteristics and taka thought it was cute.

it was very common when john and taka were working together that taka would push him to do things that he normally wouldnt if it was just bc he was uncomfortable with it- john always knew he could back out if he needed to, but taka's forceful nature was always helpful to him that way

john finally remembering what it's like to be empty of the worst of his grief and sleep without the weight of sonya's thoughts on his new relationship AND in the same bed as his partners is what finally got him to sleep well…

taka is making five flavor soup!! it requires a whole duck, a whole fish, dashi stock packets, baby shrimp, and konbu (which make up the five flavors) plus he throws in all kinds of soup toppings/ingredients like the mushrooms he was chopping!! it's his secret recipe that literally only he knows. not even takeda knows. it's secret.

taka's nickname for kenshi, kōneko, means 'little cat' (or kitten) and that's bc taka's first impression of kenshi (that we see from kenshi's pov) is that he was small in comparison to himself, and that the little face he made at the time made him look like a kitten who had gotten in trouble for stealing smth…

taka is not outwardly very touchy or lovey, and he often doesnt even say it back, so little kisses and touches are huge for him- him leaning down to kiss john and hanging onto kenshi and johnny are his sort of genuine cues that he does really want to be their boyfriend...

anyway, i think that's everything i wanted to touch on this chapter... if this was interesting at all lmk and maybe it'll be a regular thing?? 🤷

[skellebonez]

A Trip For Two?

The final fic for @lunar-wandering's Monkie Destiny Challenge! I WAS doing 8 prompts per "week", sometimes using both prompts per day and sometimes just one. This one includes:

... a lot fdkjgfdkslj. I was only able to implement a few random ones.

Happy Halloween!

AO3 Link!

“I can't believe you convinced me to do this,” Pigsy said with a grunt, hand held against the wall as he followed it toward their destination through the pitch black darkness.

“I can't believe you agreed to it only the second time I asked,” Tang countered, a soft excited but nervous laugh echoing softly.

To be fair, Pigsy had always wanted to try one of these escape rooms. He just never got around to finding the time or the right one close enough to give it a shot. Why Tang wanted to go to a murder mystery themed one specifically was easy enough, he wanted to give all his recent extra study focus a new target.

He’d been extra focused ever since the incident with Azure, no more cramming at the last second for anything. Granted, he DID change up his method of study from the one that Shifu Subodhi had him work with, but this new one seemed to work better for him in the long run when balancing the rest of his life duties. Heck, he’d even applied himself to helping Pigsy research different methods of cooking ingredients to elevate his noodles even further.

But he’d also been getting antsy. Not just because of any reason related to his studies, though he was getting more and more frustrated with not “having a better fitting challenge” every so often, antsy with all the stuff going on around them. The constant endangerment, new enemies at every corner, new powers he seemed to continue to need to master and experiment. He thought they needed something that Pigsy hadn’t had in decades.

A vacation.

So, of course, Tang figured he could kill two birds with one stone. An escape room meant a challenge he could meet head on. And this one was offering a prize to anyone who could beat it within a certain time limit. One romantic getaway for two in Guilin, where Tang promised to take him to the Yulong river when they win this.

Tang was overwhelmingly positive they would.

Pigsy had… reservations.

“Tang, you know I’ve never been good with riddles,” Pigsy protested with a snorting laugh.

“No, but you ARE good at problem solving in other ways!” Tang boasted as he looked their pamphlet over. “I’ve seen you somehow manage to Tetris in all those ingredients in your supply cabinet for the shop.”

“That’s just work brain.”

“Well your work brain and my school brain may be brilliant enough to solve this challenge and get us that romantic getaway prize.”

Pigsy couldn’t help the soft smile that crept on his face at Tang’s boasting. It was sweet, how much confidence he had in the two of them.

But Pigsy also knew that as brilliant as he knew Tang to be… he also got stuck on the crossword puzzle on the city’s homepage last week. Three letter word for mirthful.

The answer way “gay”.

They were, probably, doomed. But at least this would be fun!

Pigsy chose to believe that as they finally reached the doorway at the end of the hall, Tang eagerly opening the door to allow them inside the main escape room.

The room wasn't terribly big, all things considered. Roughly the size of the entire dining area and kitchen of Pigsy’s, it was styled like a typical western study one might see in a mansion in an American movie. If it was horribly ransacked and clearly burgled, and also meant to look possibly Haunted. If the old stains and spider webs and the creepy doll on a shelf by the exit were any indication.

So Pigsy had to give the Escape Room crew points for detail! Just crowded enough to look realistic, but not so crowded it would make the game too hard to complete at all. But it did make it clear why this room took over the prize time limit to complete for most participants. Even he was a little overwhelmed and wondering where they should start looking in all of the clutter around them.

It didn't take long for them to find the first clue, or to solve it. Ironically, it seemed like this particular one was timed and they just had to wait a moment for the TV to come on to find the next clue. In fact... most of the clues in the room seemed to come easy to them.

Right until the 6th clue, a note in a vase lead them to a riddle on the wall and, quite frankly, it made no sense.

“I made quick work of the mountain chicken to hide my motive.”

Pigsy didn’t know what the hell this clue could have meant. If a mountain chicken wasn’t a chicken… what the fuck was it? Some other kind of bird? A lizard? A salamander?

“It’s a frog,” Tang said confidently.

“How in the world did you know a mountain chicken is a frog?”

“I didn’t,” Tang said with a shrug. “But this reference book fell off the shelf and the bookmarked page was for that frog. It’s probably meant to be a clue for people who don’t know that already, it falling saved us a LOT of time!”

Yeah… just like how the TV coming on via a supposed timer gave them the clue earlier…

Was this game rigged?

... couldn't be.

But, somehow, it was right there. A broken statue of a frog that looked exactly like the Mountain Chicken in Tang's reference book. And hidden inside one of the cracks was a torn slip of newspaper, revealing who Pigsy assumed must have been the culprit and their motive for this little murder mystery.

“Hey Tang?”

“Yes, Pigsy?”

“Hasn't this seemed a little... too easy?” The chef asked, eyebrow raised in confusion.

“I think we've just gotten really lucky,” Tang said with a smile. “And we HAVE had to puzzle out all but two of the clues ourselves anyway. We're also still really close to the end time and we have one clue left...” Pigsy hummed, nodding as he realized Tang was right. They may have gotten everything pu t together, but they only had 5 minutes to put the clues together in the correct order in the little computer next to the exit door. They were still going to have to work fast to win this challenge.

As they rushed over to the computer he couldn't help but see Tang's wide smile. He was so EXCITED at the idea of winning this. Was he just happy that he could win something that he had to solve? Or was he happy that he was possibly going to win a romantic getaway with his husband? Pigsy didn't know...

But as long as Tang smiled like that? He found he didn't really care either way. He just wanted him to smile more.

“OK, so we have to put this together like... oh gosh, it's Cludo,” Tang said with a laugh. “We have to put all this stuff in like a Cludo answer but with more steps.”

“Well that's easy!” Pigsy said with a laugh. “Mr…uh… what was his name?”

“Chandler.”

“Yeah, Chandler!”

“AH, right, Mr. Chandler stole the study key and killed Mr. Doe -aka Mr. Bennet-, in the kitchen with poison and moved him to the study to make it look like the owner of the mansion did it since only he had the key!” Tang said triumphantly. “Great job, Pigsy!”

He smiled wide, turning around to grab Pigsy and plant a passionate kiss on his lips and-

Wait…

Pigsy pulled back from the kiss as the exit door opened, looking at Tang in confusion.

“I… I didn't remember his name,” he said softly.

“… I didn't either,” Tang admitted, looking around in confusion.

“Then who-”

“You're going to miss your deadline,” the mystery voice said again. From high up. And when they looked up they noticed the creepy doll on the shelf had moved, turning to stare down at them with blank glassy eyes. “… run.”

Pigsy and Tang ran faster out of that room than they ever had before. So fast they didn't notice the giggle and the soft whisper of “I hope they like their vacation” they emanated from the room before the door closed behind them.

They did, by the way.

Even if they were very cautious of escape rooms after that.

[jmagnabo92]

PM - 193 - September 9 - Throat

@prongsfoot-microfic

James loves leaving marks on Sirius' neck.

AO3

***

James’ favorite thing about lazily snogging with Sirius is that Sirius just adores when that snogging means paying attention to his throat and leaving lovely marks that reminds them (and everyone else) that Sirius is his. 

Thus, it’s fun for James when Sirius will just work on his crossword puzzles while James happily applies kisses to his throat, licking and sucking as much as he can for as long as he can.  He gets to enjoy giving him his attention, and Sirius gets to enjoy himself. 

Eventually, though, James leans back satisfied with the mark on Sirius’ throat.  

“Satisfied, love?”

“Thrilled,” James grins.

“Good because it’s time for dinner, and we can’t cook with your lips attached to my neck.”

James hums.  “Yeah, I suppose that makes a sense.”

Sirius grins and gives him a kiss.  “Don’t worry, you can always get the other side later.”

“Promise?”

“Always.”

[hideousvoid]

omgg accidentally hurting their s/o with Malleus,Leona,Riddle and Sebek please!

Royal incident

Reader: gender neutral

Warnings: none

・゜゜・┆ ° ♡ • ➵ ✩ ◛ °

You were unlucky and lucky at the same time, you didn't have to follow his orders for a couple of days and he was even a little softer! You still have a black eye tho with a sad Queen next to you, treating you like a piece of vase in a museum, if it wasn't for the fact that it was partially wanted. How did this happen? Well, it's pretty easy honestly.

Not only you stole his strawberry tart but even decided to make fun of him for his height, what was he going to do? You knew about the collar but wanted to combine the two things to see how bad it could go, bad enough. He started to scream using all the air in his lungs making his face turn red, seeing you smirking Riddle decided to use something more severe. Would you ever expect this queen to punch you in the face? You learnt that he can and will, your luck didn't come immediately neither.

The dorm leader came to your room after an entire day, he was pretty silent and then half apologized. The guilty was there but a part of his brain wanted to beat the shit or of you, let's say he did it by "mistake" ok? He made you a tart, that tasted terrible salty thanks to Trey's prank. Seeing that even the gift went wrong he chose to stay with you, stared at you for some minutes trying not to order you something.

"Yes, I'm here to tell you that I'm sorry, but never ever make fun of my height again clear?"

You tried to play with a him at chess and you nearly got punished for winning, Riddle did his best to calm down rapidly. Crosswords? He finished it for first but after four pages you got too bored. Pretty obvious you didn't dare to play video games with him after what happened with the chess. You chose to be wise and laid on your bed with him to read some books, his head was on your shoulder while yours comfortably on the pillow. At the end it went pretty good, both commented the ending and stayed cuddled some more time.

"I want to rest a little before going back to my dorm, the chaos is waiting for me I can feel it"

・゜゜・_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

You stepped on his tail by accident and the reaction was automatic, you can't imagine how sorry he is. Leona teased you at the start about how you deserved it but seeing you like that made him feel bad, a kiss will make the pain go away right? Yeah, he did that to tease you a little more. The dorm leader promised that soon he'll make up for it, believe me, it's wonderful.

"be cautious herbivore, next time I won't be this gentle with you"

But first he took care of your wound giving you a little apology, even though his tail still hurts. How did you manage to step on it? A little grumpy for it, don't bring it up again. Ruggie following Leona's orders made a rare steak with a little salad, for you and him as a snack, isn't that nice? It's not everyday that you get to be so close to the lion and eat with him, he sleeps all day so it's not easy.

You won a ticket to play with his hair and touch his ears, he was laying on your lap tho. A double win, both for him and you. Leona's ears are so soft and fluffy, twitching a little when you touched the right spot. He fell asleep with an angel face while snoring soundly as you enjoyed that special moment.

"scratch a little more to the left, yes there! Ah, that's better now"

・゜゜・_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Both were going down the stairs but Malleus was in front of you, sliding slowly probably lost in his thoughts. Trying to pass and be faster you tripped, both falling like idiots. He lost his balance when you pushed him by mistake, being focused on something else he didn't have enough time to realize since the Fae didn't expect anything this banal.

You hit yourself on the stairs a few times before the dragon wrapped his arms around you for protection, his perfume is so good too! A cologne with a pinch of sweet yet itchy fragrance, so perfect for him. Once you opened your eyes met his, a glowing green, was he always this stunning? Cold hands and skin, a silent breath being strangely hot with a charming face. The silent reigned for many seconds as both you and him were busy staring at each other.

"are you hurt child of human? You should pay more attention to the stairs since they are slippery"

You weren't too hurt but since it could become an excuse to spend more time with him, why not? Malleus wouldn't even think you could lie for something this little, but knowing that you did it for him would warm his heart. Maybe you will tell him one day, getting a soft smile on his face with a caress.

To apologize for something he didn't even did, the Fae decided to show you better his dorm. Lucky for you Sebek wasn't near or you could forget of staying so close to the dragon, so strict for nothing! You slowly took Malleus's hand in yours giving it a few strokes with the thumb, he made a little gasp and then blushed slightly. Such a cold aura when he craved for affection, a lonely person that only desired love. A fabulous afternoon passed with Malleus, a memory still running over your head.

"thank you for the company (y/n), I really appreciated passing my time with you"

・゜゜・_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Sebek was taking care of his horse when being afraid of it, he got agitated seeing it move too much for a moment and stepped on your foot. It's not a pleasant thing to have a 6'2 on your poor shoe, especially one that works out almost everyday to protect his master. A loud scream came out of your mouth as you fell down grabbing your feet, the green-head was dying of shame and humiliation.

How could he do such a thing to his crush? He was supposed to protect them not scream for the pain! Tears formed in his eyes as his voice raised incredibly starting to scream apologises, how he wasn't enough for you or Malleus and how he disappointed him as a Knight. If he had the opportunity to smash his head on a wall probably it would have been happened.

"I'm more than mortified! There aren't words to explain how sorry I am right now, I'll be better I promise!"

Sebek took you to the nursery but it wasn't anything serious, a pack of ice and the pain went away. The only thing that didn't disappear was that guilty face painted on the first year with the company of his panic. You reassured him that it wasn't anything and you weren't mad or disappointed at him, it didn't work and he continued to stay in silent waiting for you to punish him in some atrocious way. To light up the mood you proposed to get for both a drink while going to the Diasomnia dorm, he accepted without think neither for a moment.

Once to Sebek's room he stared at the portrait of his master, it was clear as the ocean that his guilty wouldn't have left him alone soon. You hugged him from the back gradually tighter, his hands on yours enjoying your warm skin. You made him turned around leaving light kisses on his cheeks and forehead, his face was red as he stood without moving a finger. Shy as always he only wrapped his arms around you only when both of you were laying down, of course you had to initiate it or Sebek would have never done such a thing without a written permission.

"you forgave me? I can't still forgive myself for what I did to you, huh? I'll try to think less about it then"

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Riddler: *hires the most steryotipical obvious mean lesbians he can find*

Matches "Bruce" Malone: It's not Selina's fault that you need to pay your henchgirls to go on a date with you. She invited me and I came. I imagine you tried the same but they can't tolarate you for free.

Riddler: Is not that deep.

Matches: *sarcastically*Sure, pal.

Riddler: They are lesbians.

Matches: *laughs* Oh yeah? That's what you tell yourself at night?

Riddler: No? That's just reality. They are the lesbianest lesbians I ever met. And they are also clearly dating each other.

Matches: Or they are just good friends and you can't accept woman don't like you.

Riddler: I met then at a gay bdsm club. They hanged a huge lesbian flag at my main headquarter without permision may I add and they are ALWAYS making out. I'm pretty sure they are a lesbian couple.

Matches: Yeah, sure. I would love to hear more of your fanfiction but me and the lady have better things to do.

[later that same week]

Batman "Bruce" : *entering Riddler's headquarter/wherehouse* You are going to Arkham, Riddler.

Riddler: *sitting annoyed in a corner doing crosswords and trying to pointedly ignore Query and Echo making out in from of a comically large lesbian flag who is both clashing with the rest of the green question mark decor and covering a huge part of it* Fucking finally! If I had to thrid wheel this two for even another second I would personally walk all the way back to Arkham and hope our old pal Jeremiah throwed the key away.

Query: Stop being so whinny, boss, it was just a quick make out session.

Riddler: Quick? You two are going on for over three hours!!!!

Query: Really, boss, you are being drama-

Echo: *looks at Query, than at the clock and shakes her head*

Query: Shit! Really?

Echo: Yeah. Wild right? *to Riddler* Sorry, Eds, we lost the time a little bit.

Riddler: *sarcastically* I noticed.

Batman: *akwardly remembering their party conversation* uh... Arkham?

Riddler: Not really, sorry for the lack of fun, I promise a better game next time. *green smoke* *dramatic escapade* Girls?

Echo: Coming. Diedre is just giving me a good luck kiss.

Riddler: If you go to jail because you can't not kiss for a minute I'm not bailing you out.

Query: That's homophobic!

[later that night]

Brucie "Bruce" Wayne: Wait... what the fuck was Riddler doing at a bdsm gay bar to begin with?

[joanthangroff]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

I was tagged by my dearest @lalalenii 🩷

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

99 but I WILL reach 100 before the year ends!!! Mark my words!!!

2. What’s your total A03 word count?

1,218,112 🫡

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Arrowverse, Glee and Teen Wolf mostly

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I can reach any star (1,185 kudos)

what if we were demigods (1,038 kudos)

I just wanna have fun and (get rowdy) (1,012 kudos)

sign of the times (688 kudos)

trying to solve a crossword (and realizing there's no right answer) (630 kudos)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, but sometimes it takes a while. I read them as soon as they’re in my inbox but unless it’s urgent I promise to answer them later and then it can take months 🫠

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh, definitely leave behind your heartache, cast away!! What’s angstier than death?

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

no return and no deposit :)

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Not often, but it happens.

9. Do you write smut?

I’ve tried a couple times but it’s never good 💀

10. Do you write crossovers?

I’m working on the obligatory Barry-Allen-and-Sebastian-Smythe-are-the-same-person-fic but otherwise not real ones. As in, I don’t usually let characters from different fandoms meet. I do regularly write stuff influenced by other fandoms or put characters in the world of another. I do have some ideas for full crossovers, though.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Somewhere out there, someone translated my Thiam fics to Russian.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yup, back in High School during class 😂

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

[sweats in St Smythe]

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My Chicles Tschick AU :(

16. What’s your writing strengths?

Dialogue!

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Action. I am very bad at describing movements.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I used to write fic in German, then made the jump to English. I think it works better when you’ve consumed the og story in the same language. (For example, I was very scared how I got the voices in my Leverage fic because I only watch it in German but wrote in English. Thankfully other fics and gifs helped 😂)

Or is this specifically about when someone speaks another language? I think in that case it depends on whose PoV you’re writing – nothing irks me more than someone not knowing a language and yet it says “X heard Y say, “[proper sentences in that language]”. I don’t think that’s authentic. I always try to make it clear when the person doesn’t know what the other is saying.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

all the ones that you adore.

I am tagging @simpledontmeanpeachy, @sophiainspace and @pikechris :)