#I don’t really *need* to schedule a post but I hardly ever use the scheduling function

[theshadowrealmitself]

Still thinking about Spiderpeople (and people connected to those Spiderpeople) from the universes where it seems an awful lot like they’re the only heroes landing in a universe where it’s one of the Spiderpeople who’s surrounded by other heroes like the Avengers and the Fantastic 4, etc

And obviously because of this they’re gonna be extra careful about secret identities because of all the extra heroes who aren’t Spidey hanging around, and I’m just thinking about the Prowler (Aaron) trying to figure out if he’s alive or even existing in this universe while trying not to give away too much so he’s just like “who’s the coolest bald man you know?”

And Spidey’s like “oh!! I know exactly who you want!! follow me!!”

He brings them to Nick Fury.

Later on they run into what’s obviously a variant of Miles, who the other Spidey of that universe didn’t bring up because Miles isn’t known as “Spiderman” in that universe (maybe it’s like “arachnikid,” or it’s Prowler!Miles, or maybe he’s just going through a phase where he’s trying out a new hero name each week, etc)

So Aaron’s like “oh great, I can definitely ask him, but again I gotta be discrete because of all these extra heroes around” so he asks him in the exact same way he asked the other Spidey (“who’s the coolest bald man you know?”)

Miles also brings them to Nick Fury.

(Yes his uncle is still alive, yes the other Aaron is absolutely gonna tell on him)

Also! Because there’s so much emphasis on the other heroes handling “big stuff”, I like to imagine they all keep trying to insert themselves into the situation because it’s a multiverse situation which falls under “their jurisdiction” and Spidey’s just like “??? they’re all Spiderpeople tho, this is my thing, go away, shoo”

[hanggarae]

GROWL - ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO ME TOO ?

↺ content your ceo has made a point of making your life a living hell and you aren’t sure how long you can keep up with it, part 2 of my ‘promotion’ series, ceo!jeonghan, f!office worker!reader, jeonghan’s such an asshole in this part even worse than in part one, jeonghan is so dumb and clueless, bffs bss, this is honestly hardly a tear jerker so idk if it’s technically angst but ig ?? idk 😞

↺ a/n : 3.5k words, npr, another enemies to lovers jeonghan, loosely based off of lyrics from growl by exo but also lowk not ?? im trying to finish this series as quick as i can bc i know that when i start studying ill go back to the irregular posting schedule and this will never see the light outside my drafts (like the chan thoughts part which i had ready for months but never got around to posting)

‘He’d get bored of trying to get a rise out of you in a month or less so all you had to do was put up with him until then’

Life was a bitch, a petty bitch- and so was Jeonghan.

It’d been four months since you became his assistant, or as you like to call it: four months of hell. He didn’t go easy on you one bit and constantly belittled you.

Ever since you left that night without him knowing he made it his personal goal to continue punishing you for it by constantly gave you tasks were no less than humiliating. You underestimated just how petty a grown man could be. Despite him clearly finding this job boring, he stayed due to the laugh he got out of making you suffer. What’s worse is you couldn’t deny the fact that he was too pretty for his own good.

“Here is your schedule for the day, sir” you forced a smile on your face, handing your boss his coffee brewed exactly how he enjoys it (you learnt that the hard way when Jeonghan once took the cup out of your hands and poured it all over your desk and paperwork, ridiculing you for ‘not being useful enough to even make a decent coffee’).

Jeonghan simply stared at you, bringing the cup to his lips and taking an obnoxiously loud sip. “Reschedule the meeting with Hong, I don’t want to have it today” he mumbled, bored of the day already.

You tried your best to compose yourself and not throw that coffee in his face while you scream about how he’s an incompetent brat that needs to actually get some work done. But you couldn’t do that so you settled with the satisfaction of imagining the scene in your head.

“Unfortunately sir, that isn’t possible. You’ve already rescheduled three times, and Joshua’s been-”

Jeonghan seemed to perk up at that, “oh the meetings with Shua? Why didn’t you say that silly? you can bring him in right now”

“I’ve told you it’s with him four times but alright-”

“No back talk or I’ll demote you to coffee maker”

You bit back the words on the tip of your tongue and instead started to walk over to the reception where Joshua was waiting.

You remember Joshua. He was still Jeonghan’s friend even back in high school, although he never picked on you like Jeonghan did. From what you remember, Joshua wasn’t really interested in proving himself when it came to academics.

“Mr Yoon will see you now” you told him politely, holding the door open for him to follow you.

“About time” he laughed with no real offence, “he really took his time, huh?”

You simply returned his laugh and agreed with him wordlessly, leading him to Jeonghan’s office. The man in question gave his longtime friend a loud greeting.

“Shua I had no idea the meeting was with you” the long haired man scoffed, “my assistant over here told me it was with your uncle”

“If that’s what you thought I don’t blame you for postponing it as much as you did” Joshua laughed easily, dispersing your anger toward your boss.

The two continued to talk for another hour or so while you drowned out the noise and focused on the task Jeonghan had given you. Times like these really tempted you to quit because what sort of maniac gives you one day to finish organising a dinner with some business partners.

When Joshua was ready to leave you followed him out and waved him goodbye before mentally preparing yourself for your boss giving you his very much unwanted undivided attention.

“y/n, you don’t have anything planned for next week do you?” your boss stated more than asked while looking through his own planner. “Any personal plans outside of work?”

His attitude irked you so much.

“Well I have a dinner with my friends for-”

“Cancel it.” Jeonghan stated plainly.

You blinked a few times, laughing awkwardly. There’s no way he was being serious right?

“I’m sorry sir?”

“You heard me. Cancel it” he approached you even closer. “And pack your bags, we’re going on a business trip tomorrow night”

Your mouth opened, anger painting your features but Jeonghan left before you could argue.

This wasn’t fair. Next week was your birthday, your friends insisted on planning a dinner for you and you were honestly really looking forward to it. Knowing Jeonghan though that didn’t mean anything to him, he’d probably laugh at you for even thinking that gave you an excuse.

Luckily, you might still make it in time for your birthday dinner. Jeonghan explained the details of the trip to you and your plane was on Thursday night, meaning you’d get back on Friday at around 6am. The dinner was planned for Friday night so if you could power through the jet lag and sleep deprivation you’d enjoy that dinner with your friends.

If you were being honest you weren’t entirely sure what you were doing on this trip. Other than ordering his room service there really wasn’t any use in your being there. Eventually you came to the conclusion that Jeonghan dragged you along in favour of just making you suffer.

For some odd reason though, Jeonghan liked to drag you along to whatever parties and dinner his aristocratic friend group enjoyed throwing.

And although it was a pretty sight, you could only really just feel out of place being there.

Like tonight, the venue was absolutely gorgeous but you didn’t belong here. Not with people that had six digits in their savings from the moments they learnt to talk.

To your surprise however, Jeonghan was uncharacteristically tame. After the way he’s treated you the last few months it was safe to assume that he would go out of his way to embarrass you any chance he got at these dinners but he was surprisingly helping you adjust well.

Tonight was your last night in Paris and the two of you were attending a dinner hosted by his associate. Wonwoo was nice, he was down to earth despite probably having more money than everyone in your branch combined.

What wasn’t nice was the way Jeonghan was stalling getting out of here. Did he want you guys to miss the plane?

“We need to head to the airport now if we’re planning on catching that plane?” You urged, trying to reason with your boss while everyone around you was distracted.

“Wouldn’t that be rude of us?” Jeonghan scoffed before smirking, “did nobody ever teach you any manners, y/n?”

No matter how much you urged Jeonghan, he wouldn’t budge. You thought it was pretty much useless at this point, debating on whether or not you should text your friends to reschedule the dinner or just let them enjoy it without you.

As you watched the flight updates on your phone and saw the signal that your flight had already left, you felt tears well up in your eyes. You were so tired of this. How many tears were you going to lose on this? On him? He didn’t even matter to you.

And you weren’t sure why you mattered to him. Just because he’s too petty to forget about something that happened in high school?

The entire drive back to the hotel, you kept refreshing the tab to see if there were any other flights but it was no use. The only ones available would make you arrive too late for the dinner so there was no way you were making it on time.

It seemed silly, being this upset about a dinner. But you hadn’t gotten the chance to properly celebrate your birthday, or anything really, in years and it felt nice for your friends to plan an entire night just dedicated to you. And you probably felt worse about all of their efforts going to waste.

When you made it back to the hotel you didn’t say a word to Jeonghan. You didn’t curse at him, you didn’t scream at him, you didn’t defend yourself from his comments.

You just.. headed back to your room and texted your friends that you were sorry.

You stayed in your room for another twenty minutes, thinking about what Jeonghan’s motive was. There was no way you could continue working with him.

A notification on your phone drew your attention. An email from some cosmetics brand wishing you a happy birthday and giving you a coupon code to celebrate.

It was only then that you realised it was now just a few minutes after midnight meaning it was officially your birthday.

Even though you should be happy, only more tears fell.

You don’t know how long you just sat on the bed, wallowing in your own self pity before somebody knocked at the door.

You quickly dried your tears before pulling it open, gasping at the sight in front of it.

Jeonghan stood there, a huge smile on his face, holding a cake that read ‘Happy birthday’ in green frosting. You hated green.

“Happy birthday y/n” he greeted loudly. There was something so sick and twisted about this. Maybe even sadistic.

Before you knew it you were tearing up again. Was this some sort of sick joke? He ruins the only plans you’ve had, the only time you’ve asked something of him these past months as his assistant, the only time you asked him to cut you some slack and he’s.. standing there smiling with a cake that has frosting of a color you hate.

“Sir, when we get back tomorrow- or whenever we do, you need to find a new assistant because I can no longer do this” you told him plainly, too tired of the way he’s treated you.

You ignored the way his face fell and eyes widened, “If I can’t return to my old position then I’d like to be transferred to a different branch. And if that’s also not possible then I resign from the company”

You didn’t wait for his answer, you didn’t wait for him to laugh and call you pathetic for quitting halfway through, you just closed the door and went to bed.

Jeonghan didn’t fly on the same flight as you, probably staying in Paris for an extra few days but you honestly weren’t sure. And you honestly didn’t care.

Despite saying you’d try staying at the company, you realised you wouldn’t be able to without feeling uncomfortable. And Jeonghan was in a position where he could still make your life hell so you simply resigned altogether.

You were a valued employee and were smart in keeping connections with big companies you’ve worked with on projects in the past, and even the few you met in your week in Paris. So you really weren’t worried about finding a new job, maybe it’d even be better than your last one.

It’d been three months since you quit working at the Yoon company and although it was nothing special at your new job it beat having an asshole boss setting you up for failure everyday.

It’d honestly be a lie to say you haven’t thought about Jeonghan since quitting. Partially because you now worked under Choi Seungcheol, who you learnt was one of Jeonghan’s best friends. Meaning you’d sometimes run into him but you never spared him a second glance.

Ever since you got the new job you decided to do some things that you’ve been meaning to but never got around to- one of them being to get a new apartment.

You’ve been living in your current one since just after you graduated college and you could definitely afford to now upgrade it. The place you’ve been looking at was in a far better neighbourhood and building.

You decided to pull the trigger on it sooner rather than later, knowing that the longer you put it off the more likely you were to just discard the idea in the end.

You hated making second trips to carry luggage, so you decided to carry all of your moving boxes in one go, despite the fact that all of them piled in your arms blocked practically your entire line of vision.

Just as you were getting off the elevator you heard the person getting on chuckle lightly at the sight in front of them.

“You need any help with that?” The voice sounded oddly familiar you thought as he started to grab most of the boxes from your arms before you could protest.

Oh is he serious?

You looked unimpressed at the man in front of you, “Give me my boxes back.”

“What-” he hadn’t noticed you until you said that. Glaring at him, clearly unhappy with seeing him again.

Jeonghan simply scoffed, not giving you the boxes back and only asking you what number he needed to take them to.

“You can take them back to my arms” you bickered despite leading him to your apartment anyway.

“Don’t think Cheol’s gonna like how you can’t type for two weeks because you broke your arms while moving” he argued back, doing a double take when he saw the number outside of your door. Giggling when he realised.

Before you could ask him what was going on he giggled, “And, it wouldn’t make me a very good neighbour, would it?”

He smiled before using his own keys to open the door of the apartment right across from yours. This cannot be real.

“You live here?” You whined, not caring if it made you look childish in front of him anymore.

“Mhm” he hummed coming back to you to help you get all the boxes inside, “Let me know if you need help with anything else, neighbour”

“So he lives literally down the hall?” Soonyoung asked you, taken aback. “Small world”

“I’m still convinced he had something to do with it” you grasped your soda can tighter, the metal denting under the pressure.

“You think he’ll be there right now?” Seokmin asked, taking another handful of popcorn.

“Why? Do you want him to give us some michelin star food or something?” Seungkwan asked, continuing to look through the selection of movies for you guys to watch.

“If he does don’t eat it! He probably poisoned it or something” you muttered bitterly.

It was just your luck for the person you despised most to just happen to now live three steps away from you.

It’d only been a week since you moved here but you’d already ran into him five times. Five times too many in your opinion. You were ready to complain about him all over again until the doorbell rang.

“What do you want?” You said crossing your arms over your chest.

“Well it seemed like such a fun party over here. How could I miss out, am I right?” You realised really was the most arrogant man you’ve ever met when he invited himself in and made himself comfortable on your couch. “What’re we watching?”

You also realised your friends were not loyal. Despite cursing him out with you for the last few months they were too quick to become friends with him- even if it was because of the alcohol you really did not care.

It was approaching 3am and you couldn’t sleep, the guys all getting too drunk and crashing on your couch in the other room.

After tossing and turning a few more times you crawled out of your bed and into the building’s hallway, careful to tread lightly to not wake anyone up even Jeonghan.

Ever since your landlord gave you the keys to your apartment and access to the building’s rooftop you think you’ve been here everyday since.

The cool breeze always hit you just perfectly, momentarily letting you forget about everything in the world.

It really wasn’t fair. How Jeonghan treated you. You laugh to yourself when you realise you hold the same thoughts as your high school self, upset that her crush all of a sudden started to insult her for being top of the class.

You’d like to say that you don’t care about what Jeonghan thinks about you, but you know you’d be lying to yourself. That inner teenager of yours that still wants Jeonghan to like her back.

You don’t think you like Jeonghan anymore- but you also don’t think you hate him. And when you realise you don’t hate him after the way he’s treated you, you think you must like him at least a little to forget about that.

“Stop biting your nails” a voice from beside you says.

You don’t recognise it at first and instantly lunge at whatever it is, thinking it was a crazed psycho killer or something.

“Okay I get I wasn’t a saint to you but you didn’t have to hit me in the face y/n what the fuck?” The man groaned.

“Well maybe you should stop sneaking up on me Yoon” you forced out despite feeling a little guilty.

“Well I wouldn’t have to sneak up on you if you acted like a normal person and didn’t leave your apartment at 3am!” He scoffed, flicking your forehead with his finger lightly.

You glared at him before turning back to look at the view over the city.

“We’re not friends, I’d appreciate if you stopped acting like we were”

“We’re not friends? And here I was buying us matching cups” fake pouted, the same way he would when you worked for him and complained about the workload.

The more you remembered how it was like having Yoon Jeonghan as your boss the less you wanted to even be near him.

“You’re not funny, Yoon” you mumbled. Not like he cared.

“You’re not my employee anymore, y/n. I don’t care if you call me by my name now” Jeonghan looked at you.

You think you got even angrier when you looked back at him. Pretty privilege was real and Yoon Jeonghan probably benefited from it the most. Even at 3am and drinking for hours he’s still beautiful enough for you to forget how awful of a person he is.

“Even so, I’m nobody compared to you and I’m nobody to you,” you laughed bitterly, “So I’d prefer to not call you by your first name. Just like you requested”

“You really hold a grudge, don't you?”

“Fuck you Jeonghan” you looked at him baffled, “I hold a grudge? You tormented me for months because of some stupid thing that happened in high school that wasn’t even my fault”

“And even now you’re-” you sputtered, “you’re still trying to blame me. I didn’t do anything to you Jeonghan! You’re the asshole that did everything to me!”

You expected Jeonghan to get mad at your rant and say something back, instead he just stared at, ghost of a smile on his lips and some unreadable glint in his eyes. “You said my name”

You rolled your eyes, scoffing. He really could not take anything serious. “What is wrong with you?”

“I’ve been asking myself that too” he got closer to you, “you know ever since you left I’ve strangely been really sad in the office. Moping around looking for something- or someone”

“After a while I realised that was you. I missed you, y/n. And then I realised I like-”

“This has to be the worst confession I have ever heard of, Jeonghan” you looked at him surprised at how he could even begin to think this was what a good confession sounded like. “If anything this just makes me think you’re a sadist who enjoys making the girl they like cry everyday in the office bathrooms”

“Cut me some slack, I only worked this out two weeks ago” Jeonghan whined, and you really had to question if he genuinely believed this would get you to forget the way he acted. “I’ve seen the damn Notebook, we’re supposed to start kissing in the rain now”

“After the hell you put me through Jeonghan, I deserve a lot more than whatever you just threw together” you said before starting to walk away.

“Wait!” Jeonghan quickly grabbed ahold of your wrist before you could leave. “What do I have to do to get you to.. you know, look I’m not good at this!”

“Well for starters I think you should look up the definition of what liking someone is and how people usually act when they do like someone. When you work out how to love them right then let me know”

“Wait but before I start to show you that I can be a good person and an even better boyfriend, can you at least let me know it’s not completely useless. Like you’re not just going to reject me in the end to get back at me” Jeonghan looked at you desperately.

“I’ll see you around” you said before leaving, retreating to your apartment for the night. But Jeonghan could see the ghost of a smile on your lips.

Jeonghan was an idiot, he thought to himself, but he had a chance. He had to work this out somehow- and quick. You were a pretty girl, probably the prettiest girl Jeonghan had ever seen, you definitely had other guys interested and if he wasn’t quick he’d end up losing you to them.

[morganbritton132]

I really love the EMTTS and every update is making my day, so thank you for being great!

I keep thinking about the shared calendar posts and have wanted to ask about it since the first post so long ago. I know it's been mentioned how annoying it is for Steve when it's not used in the way he hoped, but has there ever been a situation where it was really genuinely bad? Like, a lot of drama could've been avoided if it had been used properly? And did the kids and Eddie then feel bad about misusing it/start using it the way Steve intended? I know it drives me crazy when people intentionally ignore/misuse stuff like that that I set up. What's Steve's reaction? AHHH, so many questions!

Don't worry about answering, just do it whenever you have time and feel motivated :) Hope you have a lovely day/night!

It’s not that people don’t use the shared calendar. It’s just that they don’t use it in the way that Steve wants them to.

Like, for example, Lucas has no problem putting his work schedule into the calendar at the beginning of the month, but he never remembers to put when he picks up shifts. Robin will input her class schedule at the beginning of a semester but not her ever-changing office hours. Dustin uses the calendar frequently but he is always vague about what he’s doing (i.e. he puts ‘Moon’ instead of stargazing) and Mike blocks out time slows when he busy but never says what he’s doing.

Steve wants to know where everybody is at all times and what they’re doing. Is that a little unrealistic? Yes, and Steve can acknowledge that. But it’s still frustrating when he misses something because it was mentioned to him once and he forgot.

But also, Steve can’t drive.

He is very reliant on his friends and family. Especially because up to a couple years ago, Eddie still traveled quite a lot. Steve’s gotten better over the years at acknowledging that he needs help and asking for it, but it is a lot harder to inconvenience someone.

Steve doesn’t like Uber or any of the ride-sharing apps. It feels unsafe because he knows that there are moments where he loses time and he’s not quite in his head. There are times when he gets stuck in the fog or lost in a bad memory, and he knows that he can be reactionary. His friends know how to walk him out of that and he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt a stranger or get hurt, or get lost.

Steve carpools to school, but there have been times where that’s fallen through and he ends up feeling like he’s bothering someone because he didn’t know that they had plans already. Eddie was out of town once and Steve had a doctor’s appointment, but everybody he texted was busy so he just canceled it. He ran out of his migraine medication but turns out half their friends were at a concert so he dealt with the fallout alone.

It all kind of comes to a head one evening.

Steve is the person that plans most of their game nights and their get-togethers. They’re typically hosted at his and Eddie’s house and Steve puts a lot of effort into planning them. There’s a Saturday that no one has marked with anything, so he gets up that morning and plans a game night. He bakes and he cooks. He cleans the whole house and gets out their board games. He even sets the table for D&D even though he hardly ever plays with them.

Then Eddie tells him that he has a plane to catch. They talked about it the other day. Don’t you remember? And Dustin’s busy. He has a date. He literally told Steve about it. Mike and Will have had these plans for weeks and Max and El are at a spa. Lucas is visiting Erica in DC. He said he was going to last week, remember?

Robin is swamped with work and Nancy’s not even in town and apparently hasn’t been all week. She sent that text in the groupchat about it, remember?

And it’s frustrating.

Steve knows that it’s kinda dumb to plan a party and expect people to show up on the same day, but that’s how it’s always been, and it’s – it feels like he’s being called stupid when everybody keeps asking him if he remembers. He obviously didn’t.

All it takes is for Eddie to ask him what’s wrong for Steve to snap. He’s frustrated and he’s annoyed, and he’s a little mean about it because Eddie is the worst about using the calendar. He just says things and expects that Steve is going to remember them, and it feels like they’re making fun of him. It feels like he’s standing outside the room that they’re all in and they’re laughing at him because he doesn’t know how to get inside.

“And it’s going to get worse,” Steve says, blinking tears out of his eyes. “I’m just going to keep forgetting and everybody is going to move on, and it’s going to be like I’m not even a part of it anymore.”

“Baby, that’s never going to happen. I – We won’t let that happen. It’s just one mess up.”

“It’s already happening! You already do it.”

Eddie ends up missing his flight because he’s not going to leave Steve when he’s upset like this. He’s supposed to be working on the backing tracks for an album he’s producing, but there’s tomorrow or maybe the day after that. He does end up sending out a text to the other party members, letting them know that they’ve got to make an effort to use the calendar more. 

[dolletro]

Exhaustion

Hello DMC tumblr! This is my first ever post on tumblr! 

My native language is not english, plus I am not really sure how to write Vergils character, so he might be a little bit OOC. Despite that I did try my absolute best! Please of you have any suggestions how to polish my skills and create aesthetically more pleasing works, don’t hesitate to DM me! Constructive critisism is always welcomed! 

I was  debating wether I should post it or not, since I wasn’t sure if it’s good enough, then I though what if this is exactly the thing someone needs? 

Anyways, please enjoy!

Word count: 1.5+K

 He never meant to stay for this long in your room, all he wanted was to notify you about the training schedule change for the upcoming two days, but somehow your warm smell mixed with the vanilla scented air freshener pulled an unfamiliar kind of exhaustion out of him, so he sat down on your bed and welcomed your voice in. You talked a lot, he made a mental note in himself, about an hour into you talking about the game you were now playing, the frantic button smashing, the frustrated grunts  from time to time and your cats nestled on his chest purring away, lulled him to sleep even more.

"...And that's why I like him so much! OH, that reminds me, he is also wielding a katana just like you-..." you turned around with an excited smile, the dim, pink tinted LED strips and your TV's light illuminating your features. Eyes filled with joy looking down at him, taking in his reaction. When did he lie down on your fluffy pillows?

"You know, if you are too tired to move you can always just sleep here, I don't mind it." with that the weight from the end of your bed disappeared signaling that you stood up. Now humming the same tune as the music that was coming from the game, you began to search for something in your closet, checking an item out for whatever reason and then putting it back. Vergil averted his gaze to the bright screen, that now burned his eyes out, he certainly now missed the way you blocked a good part of it. There stood the character with a katana in his hand, body covered from head to toe in what seemed to be metal, hair similar shade to his. He had a faint idea what you might have called this warrior, but to be fair Vergil hardly paid any attention to your rambling, yet some of those tiny details that stuck made the blue devil wonder, if you liked him mainly because he reminded you of some of your favorite game characters, or if you like those characters because they looked similar to him.

'How foolish...' Vergil blinked once, twice then he moved his arm up to cover his eyes to block out any light. Why would that be the reason? You two had known each other for just a few months now, if not a year. The age gap too was quite wide in anyone's opinion, maybe twenty years give or take, and you, as if you had known eachother since forever, talk to him about everything from anything mundane to more serious or even exciting topics. Even when he used to push you away you kept on trying to befriend and create a connection with him. Maybe your unwavering determination is what led to this moment, him allowing his guard to be down around you. 

 When was the last time he was this...content? Both before and after destroying the Qliphoth nightmares often plagued his consciousness whenever he tried to sleep, often about the atrocities he had done not only to RedGrave but to the world in general, so he never really bothered to try to rest up in years. Yet now, he felt like he was in a drunken daze, everything felt surreal, like life cannot be this peaceful.

"Vergil..." a gentle hand on his shoulder pulled out of his train of thoughts. There you stood,a black sweater and a pair of gray sweatpants in hands, offering them to him. "...I don't really know if these will fit you, but hopefully they will. You can use my bathroom if you want more privacy." and with that the warmth disappeared as you sat back down in front of your TV and continued to play your game.

Vergil slowly lifted himself up from your bed, trying to shoo the cats off of himself. While he knew you had seen him half naked once before due to an incident, he didn't  want to make you uncomfortable.

"It's okay to change here too. No need to push yourself too hard." The blue devil could have sworn you were reading his mind just now if he didn't know any better. You have to be some sort of witch to know this much about his way of thinking and to occupy his mind for this long. Reluctantly he took off his coat and vest, and laid them down on your night stand. He was in the middle of unbuckling his belt when he heard rustling beside him, then once again your frame was right in front of him near the closet. You had taken his clothes and put them on a hanger.

"You sleep with socks on? I have some really fluffy pairs that will warm your feet up since this room can get quite chilly."

"There's no need for you to lend me such unnecessary items."

"Hm? You wear your boots without socks?"

"That is not what I said nor implied."

"Mhm, sure boss man." your giggles were nice, it could melt off any tension that was ever in his body. "So...no socks?"

"No need..." he sighed as he slipped off his boots, then pants in haste. The material of the sweater was soft against his rougher fingers. There was no way that it belonged to you, it must have been gifted or something because it would've been far too big on you.

"I once bought that for Dante, then I realized it would go to waste since he just doesn't wear things like that, so I kept it for myself, but you can have it if you'd like!" you chimed, once again smashing away on your buttons. The music in the game picked up as a bossfight began. Vergil tried to climb back in your bed after he put on every article of clothing without disturbing you, yet when he was almost settled you groaned loudly and put your controller down beside you. 

Silence began to set in. The only things that could be heard were the title screen of the game and your cats soft purrings as they inched closer to Vergil. The atmosphere was once again calming like the first time he sat down, but now he has a fresh set of clothes on and was buried under your two toned gray comforter, yet now somehow he felt an itch in his mind. When will you head to bed? He has only ever seen you in your pajamas when you showed up that one time in the kitchen at noon for a cup of coffee. Even then he just saw you briefly as he strolled by. Do you usually head to bed later into the earliest time of the day? Or do you ever sleep?

"Does the noise bother you?"

"No."

"Can I start a stream on youtube then? I can only sleep with some noise." Vergil stayed silent while he inspected as you scrolled through your YouTube recommendations to find an appropriate video. He was contemplating on what to say or rather ask you. He alway had been a man who spoke with well chosen words, and  right now he didn't know if he thought he didn't care enough for your emotions to question you about the matter or if he didn't want to put you into an even more sour mood.

" Has something upset you?" he ultimately decided to ask, resulting in a surprised expression on your face when you faced him.

"It’s kinda-, Well…I died in the bossfight, and I really don't feel like playing anymore." setting down the remote, you stretched.

"I see." he began to pet your lighter cat, Tofu, who fell asleep on his chest. Distant water splashed and the warm bathroom light now seeped into the room from underneath your door, then you emerged. Vergil looked at your digital clock on your wall in the same sleepy daze as he was in before, noticing that you were gone for exactly ten minutes. His eyes followed your every movement taking in your elegant gestures. Your face now appeared to be glowing, and you smelled slightly different than you usually do. You sat down in front of your mirror checking out your own skin on your cheeks and chin, before you pulled a bottle of lotion out of your vanity cupboard. The scent alone was enough for the blue devil to realize this is what made you smell the way you always did. Vergil was no expert in these kinds of things, but for him it matched your personality perfectly. It had a slightly spicy base, but some sweet undertones. You massaged the substance on your arms and legs, giving extra attention to your knees and elbows.

Your voice traveled in his ears and stayed in his mind. He recognised this tune, you hummed every once in a while when you were in a peaceful place, this meant you were no longer upset about your loss in the videogame. This melody pushed and pushed the bad thought right out of his head and filled him with an unfamiliar warmth he never felt. Vergil knew he was just right about to succumb to the sleep he oh-so desperately needed, yet he took one more glance at your calm form, he wished he could feel this content once he woke up in your room. 

Just about one and a half hours after arriving at your room to give you a heads up, the older son of Sprada welcomed the sweet slumber in.

[ladysomething]

I love everything that you’ve written for F1 so far (you are just the most incredible writer, I could read all of the fics you’ve written a million times and never get bored) but you’ve truly outdone yourself with Where You Go, I Go!!!! I literally read chapter 2 like 4 times last week and I’ve just been counting down the days until I could read chapter 3 (but I pinky promise I do not mean that in a “write faster” kind of way, I mean it in a “I was excited that I audibly squealed when I saw you posted today” kind of way). And ABO is something that I hardly ever read. But you just do it SO well. I LOVE the world you’ve built. And this fic is just SO incredible. I wasn’t sure how you could top the first two chapters, but eek CHAPTER THREE. The way that Charles going into pre-heat prevented any questions about Max and his intentions from getting answered (the tension is buildingggg) and Pierre showing up and Charles getting claimed, oh my god every scene was incredible and I am SO EXCITED to find out where this is going, because I genuinely don’t know what to expect!!! Thank you so, so much for sharing this fic with us!!!

I am a different anon than before, but I was very interested in reading your response about if you found writing long fic to be daunting. Like prev anon, I am a numbers girl, so learning a little about your writing process/philosophy was super interesting!! I have another question if you don’t mind me asking- how do you decide on your posting schedule?! Although I would literally read this whole fic in one sitting, I do love the 1+ weeks between updates because I love getting excited for a new chapter and looking forward to it, but you said in the ask that you were already writing ch6, so I’m curious what made you pick the schedule you did!!

thanks again for sharing this fic with us, we are truly all so lucky to read it!!

ahhh!!!

well firstly I can't take the entire credit for this fic. @saiyanwitcher reached out to me after I wrote Give Me That Fire and offered to beta for me. As we were getting to know each other, she asked if I'd ever consider writing an Omegaverse fic, and I said yes, and here we are. But if there is any reason why this fic is better than the others, it's all because of her! She has spent so many hours brainstorming with me, proofreading, and pulling me back from the edge when I said "I want to do THIS" and she said "girl what" (she didn't really, everything I propose she says "alright, lets figure out how we can make that work").

I'm so delighted to hear you loved chapter 3! this whole fic is sooo different to anything I've ever written, but I LOVE exploring new themes and topics and ideas in fic - you'll never really catch me doing the same thing twice. pushing boundaries is what I love about fic, but it doesn't always pay off, so I'm SO happy to hear that people are loving this fic as much as they are.

as for your question ... which, firstly, like most artists I am extremely self involved, so talking about myself is like my fave thing to do lmao. I will answer literally ANY question you could ask.

but, posting schedule. after many years of trial and error while posting long fics, the thing I've found that works for me is that I need to have a fairly sizeable amount of the story in the can before I start posting. I usually like 5-6 chapters, but, more importantly, I want to know that I have the feel of the story before I start to post, because once I post I can't go back and change things. at about that 5-6 chapter mark, I know that I'm deep enough into a story that the plot is right, the characters are right, and the tone I'm using is right, and then I feel comfortable starting to release it out into the world.

from there, I post a chapter only when I finish a chapter. so I finished chap 6 on Tuesday, and then I worked on chap 3 on Wednesday, gave it to @saiyanwitcher to beta on Wednesday evening, and then by this morning she'd done a final check and I was okay to post.

my own personal goal is to write one chapter a week, with Wednesday being the day I'm always aiming towards. so this week I was actually a little later than my "schedule" because ch 6 was giving me a headache and it took longer to write than I wanted.

at this point, I know roughly how long it takes me to write one chapter for this story (a week), but I also know some of these chapters are harder to write than others so I HAVE to give myself some extra leeway (hence the maximum of 2 weeks).

I hope that kind of explained my thought process and as I said, I'm so happy to answer any questions!

[corpupine]

A Long-Awaited Update

I’ve been putting off writing this update for a while now. Not because I’m suffering or struggling at all—life is actually really good! It’s had some truly awful, crappy stuff mixed in, but for the most part my life is very happy. The reason I’ve been putting this off is that I really don’t know where to start. Most of you will have noticed that I stopped posting updates of NemaTale on here sometime last year. There are a couple of reasons for that that I want to explain, then I want to move on to life updates and what’s coming next for NemaTale.

First: Why did I stop posting on Deviantart?

There’s no special reason or controversy here. I post on three sites: Deviantart, Tumblr, and Tapas. Both Tumblr and Tapas offer a scheduling system so that posts can be queued in advance. I was able to schedule posts on those two sites, but Deviantart doesn’t have that function, so each time there was an update I had to go in and manually enter all the information. As my life got more and more hectic (which will be explained a little bit more in the life updates section), I found that I was forgetting to update on Deviantart. I kept on putting it off, figuring I’d get around to it eventually. But uh, whoops—the end of Chapter 4 has been posted everywhere but on Deviantart! I’ll get those last pages up and running soon, but I wanted to offer some sort of explanation before I did so.

(As a side note: I haven't been keeping up with updating the links between pages on Tumblr, for a similar reason. I'll hopefully get those up and going soon so you guys can read the comic more easily on here.)

Second: What’s going on with Corpupine?

So much, you guys. Soooo much, and most of it is—like I said—truly wonderful. I haven’t been posting updates about my life hardly at all, and I want to maintain privacy, but here’s a few fun things I wanted to tell you about:

-Got a big girl job working for a local publishing company (I’m an editor by day and I love it, but it’s very time and energy consuming)

-Helped my wonderful husband self publish a book (that I edited, naturally)

-Moved to a different city

-Finally, finally finished a draft for a novel I’ve been tinkering with for 9 years

Oh, and also, this:

Yes, in what may be the best (accidentally) kept secret ever, I’m a few months away from giving birth to a baby girl. That has been the main reason for my absence online as my husband and I have been preparing for her arrival. This baby has been very much something we have hoped for, and it took longer than we expected to get this far, so we are very happy. We are over the moon excited, a little freaked out, and ready to snuggle her sooo good.

So with that bombshell dropped, let’s talk a little bit more about the stuff you’re all really here for.

What’s next for NemaTale?

Months before I got pregnant, I had already finished Chapter 5. The script for chapter 6 is about 50% written—the broad strokes are there, I just need to nail down the dialogue. Then I started my big-girl job, and life started to get a little out of control. I was incredibly busy all the time with my job, and helping my husband with his book, and I really wanted to start using any free time just to rest and recuperate. I think that was the best choice for me; too much on my plate would have probably led me to have a nervous breakdown, haha. As it is, I’m doing well emotionally, but . . . I haven’t drawn anything since about June of last year. So we’ve got Chapter 5, totally finished and just waiting to be queued up; chapter 6, partially written; aaaaand then a big black void in front of me. (Why does that word feel so . . . familiar?) That should be scary to me, but it’s not. I’ve accomplished a lot, even if I haven’t progressed on the comic. I’m proud of myself and how far I’ve come. But what does that mean for you guys?

Here's the lowdown: I’m giving birth soon. I’m not going to be able to commit to any sort of comic goals in the near future. I’m not even sure what the future of NemaTale looks like, but I do know this: I still love this story. I don’t want to stop creating it, but now’s not the right time for me to be focusing on that. Sometimes life just gets too full to do everything on the list. I just can’t keep this at the top of my list for now.

Chapter 5 is, as I’ve said, completely ready to go (except for the chapter cover, which I haven’t made yet.) So I’m going to put this choice out to you guys. What do you want? Do you want me to go ahead and post chapter 5 over the next few months and then I’ll just see you all when I see you, somewhere down the line? Or do you want me to wait to post chapter 5 until there is also a chapter 6 officially on the way? That could take many, many months, so be aware of that.

I love the interactions I have with all of you. I’d love to keep having them, even if I won’t be able to post new stuff beyond chapter 5 for a while. But I really am okay doing whatever you guys think is best with regards to posting chapter 5. Just let me know in the comments below.

All right, I think that’s everything. I appreciate your patience with me in all this. In the past year, so much has happened. My husband and I have gone on adventures. I turned twenty-five and I’m finally starting to feel more comfortable in my own skin. I tragically lost one dear relative and for a while we thought we were going to lose another one—which, miraculously, we haven’t. Spring is here, and there’s a little girl kicking me in the ribs as I write this. Life is good.

[oldsargasso]

A sudden thought—do you think Winner’s parents dote on the rest of the polycule? I get the impression Kim’s family is back in Korea, so him and Dean and Kenta don’t exactly have any blood relations around. While Winner’s parents certainly aren’t the BEST people, do you think they take well to his boyfriends? Do they have them over for regularly scheduled family dinner time? Do they gift the boys overly large portraits of Winner? So many thoughts to be had

woke up to this and then had to do actual work at my actual job instead of replying 😒 might be a crime actually.

I have been thinking about Winner and his parents a LOT lately actually (working on the next part of bad habits - I JUST REALISED I haven't posted part 3 yet lol) anyway. Yes. to all of that.

I'm looking at all this from the headcanon that Winner's parents are rich and they dote on him like no other (he's an only child FOR SURE). they love him and he loves them. maybe there was a time when he was a moody teenager and he said he hated them but they're past that now. his mother was definitely one of those mums that turns up to school events way overdressed but pulling it off because you can tell she's so thrilled to be there for her kid. but also she complains to the principal if Winner doesn't win something.

sorry am now just thinking about Winner being excited for when he's old enough to be included in his parents "bitching about other people" sessions. if anyone's house is well-stocked with nice alcohol it's theirs.

I think they accept him having a boyfriend because he's their son and they love him. they're just happy he's settling down 😌(winner used to get around for sure) it definitely starts as just ONE boyfriend. test the waters. I'm enamoured with our idea of Winner using his parent's connection and money to get Dean's legal punishment massively downgraded or absolved. and Dean's a sweet boy 😌 (I'm thinking about this conversation lol) his parents are like "okay! a boyfriend! living together already? that's a big step sweetheart--- no you're right it does make sense financially but you know we're always happy to help, you don't need three housemates even--- no we understand, you like to always have people around but you know you're always welcome to move back home---well of course we want you to be happy, darling but---" then Winner does visit them at home. and brings Dean and their two. housemates.

Kim is their favourite obviously. even when he's just hanging around as a "friend". he's polite! he smells really good - no it's not weird to notice that about your son's friends okay - and he's really good at diffusing any kind of tensions that might build up.

but Winner's parents DO NOT like Kenta. he would ping a parent's radar so hard. danger senses in high alert. he doesn't hardly talk. he always stands in awkward places, like he's not really trying to join the conversation? "and he smokes, darling, I thought you said you were going to quit, that can't be a good influence". and then Winner's mum accidentally sees Kenta's back, all scarred - Winner makes up a story like "oh he was in a bad car accident..." and his mother is like "oh well time to adopt him actually." and Kenta gets into the kitchen and bakes a bunch of delicious things and further cements his place in their hearts.

and then obviously they get caught mixing up the couples. maybe Kim kisses Winner (they thought his parents were gone!) and they're like "how could you cheat on poor lovely Dean! we raised you better than that! although it is Kim...." and then Winner and his parents get drunk and have a heart to heart.

it takes a moment but Winner's parents are like "well obviously many people would fall in love with our wonderful son 🥰" Winner's dad sits the other three down for a communal shovel talk. his mum corners Winner and shows him every single present her husband ever bought her like "this is the standard, sweetheart, I better not hear of you not meeting it". they send gifts for everyone's birthdays and half the time it's things Winner didn't even know the others liked or wanted.

[fitgothgirl]

⬆️ Lovely sunset walk the other day, and the venue of a wedding I went to this past weekend

⬆️ My outfit for said wedding, and more pretty walk views. Not my favorite pic of me but didn’t get a better full body one and I loved my shoes 🥰🕸️🖤 (purchased them a while ago, hadn’t had a chance to wear them yet). The dress and belt were also new!

Hiiieeee I’m still alive. Been enjoying some time away from social media again. Most times I get the compulsion to click on tumblr or Reddit or something, I just click Solitaire or Wordscapes instead. And times when I have clicked on social media have been fairly short sessions before I remember why I stay away.

Of course I do always miss tumblr peeps... 🖤 That’s always the biggest downside of these breaks.

Went to the gym the day before yesterday for yet another “kicking out the cobwebs” session. Last workout was 4/2, and before that my last one was 3/22, etc... Bit of a pattern haha. But I’m already planning to get back today! I don’t want to keep doing this once-every-1-to-3-weeks thing. It’s better than nothing of course but I want to be doing at least twice a week... Ideally 3 times a week, but I’ll take fewer days first while just getting some friggin consistency down.

Therapy is going well, I wish I could see her more than every other week but it’s okay as it is for now. I’m still trying to get my official ADHD diagnosis and am in the process of switching psychiatrists at the service I use. But in the meantime my therapist sent me a couple links to sites for ADHD assessment that she’s pretty sure the psychiatrist will refer me to anyway (therapist and psychiatrist are from the same telehealth service). I tried one and it let me know it’d be a 60-90 minute process that I’d do on my own and then someone would reach out to me to schedule an appointment for me to talk to a doctor. The very first thing of this assessment was a page that just said “In your own words, please tell us more about why you are here, and your long term goals” and it had a blank area for me to type with no character limit... I was like ohhhohohooo wow... Where to begin... They’re going to get an essay from me. But it also just triggered some major overwhelm-shutdown too. The irony of it is great. I’ll need to get in the zone to tackle this, but it did warn me it’d be up to 90 minutes; we’ll see if I even stay within that lol.

Otherwise with therapy, I’ve been good about doing my “homework.” I keep a little post-it on my desk’s hutch near my monitor so I see a bullet point list of the key things for me to remember until the next appointment. Those are my priorities and anything else is just bonus. Some things don’t get done but that’s to be expected - she says if I always did 100% in everything then she’d ask if I was really being honest lmao. But no self-deprecation or guilt allowed!

Weather has been beautiful and I’ve been spending time outside, either in the backyard or going for walks. One thing my therapist brought up with me when I was talking about wanting to get 10,000 steps a day since it’s so good for so many things, was that it’s a little unrealistic to expect myself to suddenly do something every single day when I’m hardly ever doing it to begin with. My Fitbit makes me want to hit daily goals but what other habit changes would I expect to suddenly do daily? Most of the time we try to do new things once or twice a week or whatever. Kind of was like an aha moment for me and helped lessen the guilt of how much I struggle to get that done. So now my daily step goal is 5,000, which is still a little more than I’d get just sitting around all day, so that’s a good goal. And for 10,000 steps, for now I’m aiming to hit that once a week. I’ve dedicated Tuesdays for that. And if I get it more days than that, then great! And I’ve actually gotten 10,000 steps on 5 out of the last 10 days... 😳 Plus another day of 9,000. Funny how that works lol.

We had a slender salamander in our backyard 😭 Look at him legs do steppies!!!! 🥺🥺 Also peep my bf helping take off the thing stuck to him lol. We’re in a moderately dense suburb-ish area so we don’t get much besides some birds and the usual stuff. Wonder where he came from and where he went…

I could probably keep going, but I’ll end this essay here for now lol.

[adventuresinclientservice]

The sanctity of deadlines.

Every week for the past 13-plus years I have felt a lingering, persistent obligation to write something for Adventures.  I suppose I could balk at this self-imposed mandate, but in truth, I actually like the weekly routine:  posting every seven days adds an element of structure to what otherwise is a largely structureless week, without unduly burdening me with a more frequent commitment I often would find myself unable to fulfill.

Even with the leniency of a once-weekly schedule, I struggle to formulate a story line engaging to me and ideally helpful to at least some of you, which is why I often turn to other sources for a starting point:  something I see on television, an opinion piece I see in The New York Times, or an article I read in The New Yorker. 

I am hardly alone in this paucity of ideas.  Unable to find a reason to write, colleagues I know whose work I read and admire often go weeks, even months, between posting content.  A few sadly have abandoned their posts.

I suspect they have come to the realization they no longer have something to say.  I will give no quarter to such a realization.  Posting once a week might not matter to many if not most of you; it matters a great deal to me. 

Writing is a muscle; to borrow from my years as a regular, gym-going fitness person, “You don’t use it, you lose it.”  I have no intention of losing it, at least not today, not next week, or next month.  Maybe not ever.

This post was the furthest thing from my mind as I read a New Yorker Profile on the author, producer, director, and show running Scott Frank, creator of two highly esteemed, award-winning scripted dramas, Godless and The Queen’s Gambit.  Buried in the story as a near-afterthought was a quote from the character Chili Palmer (played by Jon Travolta, from a favorite movie based on the Elmore Leonard novel, Get Shorty, for which Frank served as writer).  There’s a moment when Palmer says, “Sometimes you do your best work when you got a gun to your head.”

My remit to publish once a week is like having a gun to my head, a small-bore one, likely to do damage but not be fatal if I fail and it discharges.  All of you, however, faced with demanding, I-need-it-yesterday clients, unreasonable you-will-do-this-now bosses, and I-really-need-your-help colleagues, face a much larger caliber weapon, one that can do real damage to the prospect of success or failure, to your career, and to your morale.

I know just how hard this can be, so what do you do when you are faced with multiple deadlines, all of which need to be met?

Your circumstance of competing interests – family, work, other priorities particular to you – make me ill-equipped to offer advice.  What I can do is share what I used to do when I needed to hit a date with a deliverable:  a presentation, a proposal, a response to a client complaint, or anything else that cried out for an answer.  As you read what follows, keep in mind I was younger and slower, without the advantage of the technology I rely on today to accelerate my work.

I would start by sorting seemingly competing needs by priority:  if it were urgent and important, I’d jump on it, putting it first in line.  If it wasn’t, I’d put it aside for the moment; not ignore it, but not attend to it either, with me having the courtesy to inform my client, colleague, or boss why it was not a priority, managing their expectations, and anger, by telling them when I would get to it.

I’d then turn my attention to the on-fire item.  Back then I was single, without children and the responsibilities that come with them, so if I needed to stay late, I stayed late, even if “late” meant extending to early morning hours.  If I needed to work a weekend, I did so, sometimes both days and occasionally nights. 

On rare occasions, if a deadline was looming and I absolutely, positively had to get something done, I’d stay all night.  On one occasion, I stayed two straight nights.  In retrospect, that was insane, but the need was great, the time was short, and my skills were wanting.  I muscled the job to completion.

I never procrastinated, mostly because I was deathly afraid of falling short, of not meeting that deadline, which motivated me to start as early as I could and work as diligently as possible.  The longer I worked, the more practiced and disciplined I became.

On Monday I turned 73; next month it will be 40 years since I began my advertising career at Digitas.  You might think that, with the passage of time, a deadline doesn’t hold the same degree of attention it once did.  The truth is, I respected it when I started out; I respect it today. 

Your situation and circumstances are different from and likely vastly more challenging than mine, but even so, the sanctity of a deadline and the need to pay heed to it remains.

[ladyartemesia]

TEASER: Kim Seokjin and the Mean Omega

Pairing: Nerd Alpha Kim Seokjin x Popular Omega Reader

Genre: A/B/O • Enemies to Lovers • (Sorta) College AU • Best Friend's Brother AU (Who is surprised? No one?)

Teaser Word Count: 3.6K

Teaser Warnings: A/B/O sexual dynamics • suggestive content

Rating: Explicit (18+) (Teaser is PG-13)

Summary: In the modern world, alphas are almost unheard of so why even bother learning about them? After all, as a spoiled (but reasonably kind-hearted) omega who is used to getting whatever she wants, you have better things to do. However, when unexpected circumstances throw you in the path of (extremely) nerdy and (probably?) shy Kim Seokjin, you're shocked to discover that he won't be wrapped around your little finger as easily as all the rest. Bringing that infuriating geek to his knees quickly becomes your personal mission in life... But it turns out that Kim Seokjin is not what he appears to be and the mean omega who eats beta boys for breakfast is about to get way more than she bargained for...

Author’s Note: This story would not be here without the love, support and friendship of my incredible support system. You talk with me, you laugh with me, you listen when I’m crying, and you read my chaotic drafts when I am ready to pull my hair out of my head in frustration. I love you all. @ppersonna @xjoonchildx @untaemedqueen @lemonjoonah. ALSO thank you to each and every one of you who encouraged me to post this story. This fic is dedicated to all of you as a token of my love and appreciation. Your support keeps me writing. Never doubt that for a second.

“...due to discriminatory anti-alpha policies in the late nineteenth and early twentieth century, alphas were nearly eliminated from the general population…”

You heaved a weary sigh and rolled your shoulders—stretching the buttons of your high-end Oxford shirt to their limit. The beta sophomore to your right whined audibly and you smirked.

“...despite efforts to restore the genetic balance of designations, alphas currently comprise less than one percent of the population…”

Your back arched slightly as you crossed your legs, letting the absurdly short hem of your skirt ride up even higher. The poor boy you were tormenting shifted miserably in his seat.

How was he supposed to focus on a Human Biology and Designation Studies lecture when the living breathing embodiment of every sweaty undergrad’s fantasies was twisting her fingers in her hair and wrapping her pretty pink tongue around a strawberry lollipop right there in the middle of class?

“...unlike betas and omegas, alphas possess enhanced strength and the ability to compel other designations with their voice. Unmated alphas especially were often baselessly feared and distrusted...”

You knew exactly how you affected boys like him. You were a shameless tease who relished their attention and the power it brought you. Who needed drugs when driving a man mad with desire was a rush more potent than any high?

“...and that’s all for today so please read pages 450-466 in the text over break and remember to turn in your essay on scent and consent in intimacy—”

That poor sophomore looked like he had finally worked up the courage to speak to you, but you were already out the door and tearing down the hall toward your beautiful (and entirely platonic) counterpart, Kim Taehyung.

“Do you think Professor Moore is unaware that class is over at 3:25 or is he just torturing us for science?”

Taehyung shrugged, falling into step beside you with practiced ease.

“I mean I would torture you for free so it’s hard to say.”

The corner of your mouth quirked up at his characteristic dry humor, but the irritation at being held in that sweltering lecture hall for an extra ten minutes had frayed your temper.

“It’s the last class before spring break, I’m sure he was on some sort of twisted power trip.” You dug around in your purse for some chapstick, ignoring Tae’s amused snorting, “Alphas barely exist anymore and none of us are likely to meet one. Why bother learning what they can do?”

Taehyung tilted his head in amusement.

“You might be surprised.”

The final party before the beginning of spring break was always a laid back affair.

Many people had already caught planes to their various destinations, but your flight was scheduled for early tomorrow morning—leaving you with some time to kill.

Taehyung pressed his newest experimental concoction into your hand within minutes of entering the house (a surprisingly neat bachelor pad owned by two seniors, Jung Hoseok and Min Yoongi) and then darted back to the kitchen to craft more questionable alcohol potions like a deranged party warlock.

You had just found a comfortable place on the couch and were contemplating whether sampling your best friend’s mad scientist elixir would be worth the probable damage to your body when—

“H-Hello...”

It was that sophomore from your Designations Studies class. What was his name again? Jungwoo? Jinwook?

“Jungkook,” you smiled, delighted to have remembered before it became awkward. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

You motioned to the empty cushion next to you and the man in question scrambled over like he’d won the lottery.

“I—I know we don’t know each other well, but I noticed you were absent during Professor Moore’s lecture on intimacy and scent consent so I—” he blushed deeply, “I wrote the essay for you—and I brought a copy on my flash drive if-if you want it.”

Your heart melted immediately.

“Oh my gosh Jungkook, that is so sweet of you!”

Your gaze darted over his muscular form and thick brown curls.

Sweet indeed.

“I don’t want to miss out on the learning though,” you pouted, placing a hand on his tattooed bicep. “Can you explain it to me?”

Jungkook nodded vigorously even as his wide eyes fell to where your fingers were sliding slowly over his chest.

Scent consent was a pretty basic and universally known concept, but you really were touched by the handsome sophomore's consideration.

Why not give him (and yourself) a little reward?

“Um so basically if two people are involved in...intimate activities—”

You leaned forward to nip his ear lightly and he whimpered.

“Like this?” you asked innocently.

“Y-Yes. Like that.” He gulped. “In an intimate situation consent or refusal can be smelled. The scent of refusal or reluctance in intimacy is strong, unmistakable, and has a high chemical potency.”

“Is that so?” you drawled, sliding over onto his lap. Jungkook’s eyes rolled back into his head and you bit back a grin.

He was adorable.

“Uh-huh—it—oh my gawd,” (you were nibbling on his ear again) “it can immediately block sexual arousal and performance in the other partner. Meaning, if consent is not present, then it becomes difficult or—ahh” (his voice began to waver under your continued attention) “—or even impossible to continue with intimate acts.”

Your hand slid up to his cheek, bringing him closer till your lips were almost touching.

“Then what does it mean if I’m still so turned on right now?”

“It means,” Jungkook shuddered—nearly delirious with your scent, “that I really really want you.”

Across the room, Park Jimin chuckled as he watched you seduce his enthusiastic friend.

Jeon Jungkook was such a sweet kid.

Hopefully he wouldn’t get too attached.

“Wow... Some people are genuinely born blessed I suppose.”

Jimin turned to see Jung Hoseok eyeing the dimly lit corner where you and the eager young sophomore were exploring each other.

It was a rather...provocative spectacle. Not quite raunchy (you weren’t truly an exhibitionist)—just insanely sexy.

Jimin’s gaze lingered on the smooth curve of your thigh where Jeon Jungkook was currently holding on for dear life.

Lucky bastard.

“Ah you know how she is,” he sighed. “That boy isn’t going to get any farther than anyone else.”

It was relatively common knowledge that you liked to mess around but rarely—if ever— fully hooked up with anyone.

Jimin asked you about it once during a drunken game of truth or dare and you had just shrugged, mumbling something along the lines of avoiding STDs (which—to be fair—was at least part of your motivation), but the truth was a little more complicated than that.

In terms of experience, you weren’t a virgin, but... you hadn’t actually had sex in years.

You loved the chase, the foreplay, the build-up—the game of cat-and-mouse between two people who were attracted to one another.

But the final consummation was always so…

Wildly unfulfilling.

Every encounter left you frustrated. Empty.

Grumpy—even.

So you stopped bothering with it all together. (That was what sex toys were for after all.)

At the end of the day you were perfectly content being labeled a tease—it meant that people tended to know what they were (or rather weren’t) getting into when they rolled the dice with you.

Besides…it hadn’t even put a dent in your throng of admirers.

You were sunny, spoiled, indulgent, almost universally adored—

And you loved every minute of it.

“You know…” Hoseok took a long sip of his drink. “I always thought she would end up with Taehyung, but it’s been three years.”

Like you, Kim Taehyung was a trust fund brat and it was only natural that two beautiful and absurdly privileged people would gravitate to one another. You met at a freshman pledge party and had been an inseparable (and formidable) dynamic duo ever since.

The undisputed king and queen of campus.

Yes—maybe the two of you were a little self-absorbed at times, but it was hardly your fault that people tended to instinctively cater to the force of your combined looks, wealth, and charisma.

And it didn’t hurt that neither of you were ever intentionally cruel or unkind.

Just... habitually thoughtless.

(Though not when it came to each other. If anything your friendship was one area where you were both a little more human.)

Jimin shook his head.

“Nah that’s never gonna happen.” He tapped his nose. “They’re scent-crossed.”

Hoseok’s eyes widened.

“Really?”

Scent-crossed pairs didn’t smell sexually attractive to each other.

Like. At all.

No matter how physically or visually appealing an individual might be, it would be near impossible to form a sexual or romantic attachment to them if you were scent-crossed. Alphas, betas, and omegas were all subject to their noses first and foremost in the realm of attraction.

You and Taehyung smelled like comfort and home to one another...

But you were more turned on by a crisp cup of apple juice than you were his scent and the feeling was quite mutual.

He might as well have been your actual brother.

“That explains so much.” Hoseok snorted as he watched a drunken Taehyung do a flying leap on top of both you and Jungkook.

“Why is sunlight so offensive?” you croaked, dragging yourself and your luggage toward the boarding ramp next to an equally miserable Taehyung.

“The next time I book a flight before 9 AM, please shoot me,” he grunted.

Your parents were celebrating their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary with a month-long European cruise so your best friend had graciously invited you to spend two glorious weeks of spring vacation at his family estate.

The invitation had actually come as somewhat of a surprise because—for all your closeness—Taehyung was uncharacteristically tight-lipped about his family.

Not that he was deliberately withholding information per se… It was just that he never really brought them up beyond an occasional passing comment.

The one time you did ask him about them directly he sighed and said—

“We’re very close, but… I suppose we’ve just gotten used to being very private.”

There was clearly more to the story, but you were confident that Tae would share it if and when he was ready.

“My parents are in Seoul opening a new branch of the company. They took my little sister with them and my older brother has his own house so it will be just us.” He snuggled deeper into the first class seat directly next to yours. “We’ll hang out by the pool and chill during the day, then hit up some of the new clubs or whatever at night.”

“So… No one from your family will be there?”

Perhaps the invitation was not so surprising after all.

“Nope. Just you and me and thirty acres of ocean front property.”

You grinned.

“Perfect.”

“Whose room is that?”

The two of you were lugging your bags down the main hall of Taehyung’s expansive mansion when a strange hint of...something caught you right by the nose.

Your friend turned to find you frozen and staring curiously at a familiar door near the balcony.

His eyes widened, but you were too preoccupied to notice his momentary concern.

“That’s just Jin’s room.”

A firm hand wrapped around your wrist and dragged you away, but your eyes stayed glued to the source of the mysterious scent until you were around the corner and out of sight.

Your suite for the next two weeks was right across the hall from Taehyung’s. There was a whirlpool, a full bath, a balcony, and an ocean view that would rival the cover spread of any travel magazine.

Tae headed for the shower (to ‘wash the airplane off’) immediately after showing you the room and you were thinking of doing the same except…

Your mind kept going back to that door and the hint of scent you detected.

There was something… different about it.

It was faint—and far from fresh (which made sense considering that one of the few things you did know about Kim Seokjin was that he hadn’t lived in this house for years).

But still…

The need to smell it again pressed insistently at the back of your mind.

Suddenly the sound of Taehyung singing raunchy lyrics in the shower carried over through the walls and you found your feet moving almost of their own accord.

What Tae doesn’t know won’t hurt him, you rationalized, making your way down the hall toward Jin’s door. Besides—it’s not as if I’m going to steal anything…

You just needed to find that scent again.

By the time your fingers closed over the knob every one of your nerves was strangely—acutely—alert but nothing could have prepared you for what was waiting behind the door.

Oh. My. Gosh.

“What a colossal nerd.”

The room was covered floor to ceiling in Nintendo memorabilia.

Bright primary colors assaulted your eyes from all directions in the form of action figures, posters, pillows, and every other conceivable merch variety known to man.

In the center of the suite stood a large king-sized bed covered in a custom black couture toile-style Mario-verse bed set (that looked every bit as expensive as it was geeky) and a mountain of high quality Nintendo character plush toys.

Everything was simultaneously luxe and nostalgic—a rare combination of sophisticated aesthetic balance and childlike indulgence.

And the scent was there.

It was faint and covered under layers of cleaner and air fresheners, but still lingering just below the surface—too weak for you to get a really good whiff, yet potent enough to torment you.

You moved forward unconsciously toward the strongest source of the hypnotic smell—the strangely inviting expanse of Kim Seokjin’s mattress.

Suddenly the urge to climb—no crawl—across the bed itself and roll around in it like a kitten in catnip gripped you out of nowhere.

“What the hell?” you muttered, rubbing absently over the mating gland at the base of your neck.

Something very odd was going on with your body.

Your restless gaze zeroed in on one of the stuffed toys piled atop his pillows. It was a cute little mushroom man your brain recognized as a Mario character named ‘Toad’.

Take it.

Your mouth dropped open in shock.

You need it.

“Am I going insane?” you wondered aloud.

You have to take it.

Muscles in your hand began to twitch involuntarily. You bit your lip.

Bring it back with you.

Several minutes later a freshly washed Taehyung wandered over to your room and found you sitting perfectly still on your bed while staring off into space.

His head tilted in curious concern.

“Everything ok?”

You started a bit at the sound of his voice, but recovered quickly.

“Never better!” you chirped—almost too brightly. “Let’s go get some dinner, I’m starving.”

Then you grabbed his hand and pulled him down the hall toward the kitchen—shutting the door before he could catch a glimpse of his brother’s stuffed Toad doll stashed underneath your pillow

“...a critical water main rupture in the city’s New Market district early this morning has forced several residents out of their homes as flood water swelled up to nearly two feet. The governor declared a state of emergency and ordered hotels around the city to accommodate the displaced citizens. Crews are still clearing the water and assessing damages. We expect—

“Hey!” you shouted through a mouthful of cereal, after Your best friend switched off the television, “I was watching that!”

“And what you should be doing is getting ready for the pool.” Tae snatched your cereal bowl and dragged you by your shirt collar toward the stairs. “It is the first morning of our vacation. I’m not trying to waste any time. Now go.” He shoved you forward, smacking your ass for good measure.

You swatted back at him half-heartedly as jogged back up to the room where you enjoyed a surprisingly restful sleep last night.

Kim Seokjin’s door glared at you accusingly as you shuffled past—unable to let you forget that you had kidnapped it’s little mushroom man in an unexplained fit of kleptomania, but that was a problem for your future self.

The you of right now was going to zen out in the Kim family's premium glass-enclosed indoor pool (it was still a little chilly for the outdoor pool) with her best friend and bask in the simple joys of good company and no responsibility.

...Or not.

A few minutes later you bounced into the living room wearing a simple black tankini with a cute floral cover only to find Taehyung on the phone with his head in his hands.

“Yes, sir. I understand… I...I know this is my responsibility...”

That didn’t sound good.

After a few more tense moments, Tae hung up and collapsed backward into the couch with a heavy sigh.

“That water main break you heard about on TV this morning was the last straw between the province and its current contractor. They called an emergency meeting for new bids.”

Your heart dropped as you sank down beside him.

“Your dad wants you to go...doesn’t he.”

Taehyung nodded miserably.

“He can’t leave the Seoul opening on such short notice and managing government construction contracts is part of what I’ve been training for. This could be huge for our company.”

“Well...why doesn’t your brother go?”

“Jin is the brains behind most of our patented gaming and tech innovations. He wouldn’t even know where to begin with this sort of thing. Besides,” his lips quirked up in a rueful grin, “my brother doesn’t have the patience to stroke entitled geriatric egos for hours on end—which is likely what I’m going to have to do.”

The two of you headed back to Taehyung’s room where you helped him pack some suits and toiletries for his trip.

Naturally you were disappointed but...this was a great opportunity for your best friend to prove himself in his chosen field and you both knew it. In fact, he was already starting to brighten a bit.

“The meeting is about a hundred miles north of here. My dad’s secretary already handled the flight and hotel room.” His eyes darted around the suite to see if he was forgetting anything.

It was clear he was nervous, though you were sure he didn’t need to be. Kim Taehyung was a trust fund brat, but he was also talented and deeply passionate about his family’s company.

Someday this would be the norm. The two of you were stealing time in college, determined to live a little before the expectations of your powerful families transferred fully onto your shoulders.

It was becoming more and more clear, however, that your carefree time was slowly running out.

Mother had already spoken to you about potential marriage alliances and your father expected you to intern with his Vice President this summer just as your elder sister had...

Taehyung’s voice suddenly interrupted your bittersweet introspection and you couldn’t help but smile at how grown-up he looked in his suit and briefcase ensemble.

Everything was going to change, but not quite yet.

“They estimate negotiations should take around a week or so…” He walked over and pulled you into a tight hug. “There should still be some vacation left for us when I get back.”

“Hurry back then,” you mumbled grumpily into his chest and he chuckled.

“I will.”

Taehyung had been gone for less than twenty minutes when you decided that the best use of your time would be to eat more snacks.

The last thing you expected when you skipped merrily into the kitchen was to find it occupied by a shaggy-haired homeless man in glasses.

Your first instinct was to scream which caused the homeless man to drop the apple he was biting right onto the floor where it rolled around for a small eternity before coming to rest at his ankles.

Your second instinct was to grab a butcher’s cleaver from the nearby knife block and wave it chaotically at the intruder while shouting something along the lines of—

“You’ve made a huge mistake! My boyfriend is the biggest, meanest mafia boss in Seoul! Leave now and he might let you live!”

The homeless man continued to stare at you with a mixture of confusion and shock, but made no move to run away in terror like you were hoping.

So you tried again.

“Didn’t you hear what I said?! The last man who touched me drinks his steak through a straw now! Do the smart thing and leave before my boyfriend comes down those stairs and it’s too late!”

Infuriatingly, the homeless man was still not fleeing for his life and frankly you were starting to get frustrated. You drew in a deep cleansing breath and were prepared to issue another grandiose threat when he finally spoke.

“I’m sorry, miss. I... think there’s been some sort of mistake. Who is your boyfriend?”

There was no rational explanation for what came out of your mouth next, but it rolled off your tongue so smoothly and you didn’t even flinch.

“Kim Seokjin.”

For the first time in your entire exchange, the intruder looked truly alarmed.

Now that’s more like it.

“You’ve heard of him I see. He’s a dangerous man and my body belongs to him.” You slammed the cleaver down onto the countertop with a (hopefully) menacing slash. “Kim Seokjin doesn’t like when other men put their hands on what belongs to him.”

There was a long, unpardonably tense moment of silence…Then the stranger slowly reached forward and picked up a mobile phone from the table in front of him.

His eyes remained locked with yours as he pressed a quick series of buttons, brought the phone to his ear, waited a few seconds and said—

“Taehyung… Would you mind telling me why there is a half-naked, knife-wielding omega in our kitchen claiming to be my girlfriend?”

Hello! Please comment on this post if you would like to be added to the taglist!

You guys were all so wonderful, and encouraging, and excited that I literally got this teaser out in three days! If you like what you read so far, please let me know! I cannot put into words how meaningful and valuable feedback is to me. I truly treasure it! It fuels my creativity and keeps me writing. I would love to hear from you!

[the-bau-quinjet]

My Only Girl

Summary: request! Reader has to decide between keeping her secret and saving the man she loves. In the end, it's not a hard choice.

Warnings: violence/blood

Word count: 3370

a/n: I really enjoyed writing this one! I put a screen shot of the request at the end just because I didn’t want to give away the whole story :)

You never would have guessed that today would change everything. It started the same as any other Thursday. 

You were seated at your desk right outside of Tony’s main office working on his schedule for two weeks from now. Your music was playing softly through your earbuds causing you to bob your head as you read email after email. 

Suddenly, a Starbucks cup appeared in front of your face, a metal hand wrapped around the cup. 

You swiftly pulled the earbuds from your ears, turning in your chair to greet Bucky with a hug. 

“Hi.” You whispered into his chest during your hug. “You are truly a gift.” You smiled, taking the cup with your go to order. You press a quick kiss to his lips only to be pulled back in for a deeper kiss by Bucky. 

“Y/N, do you know when my next press conference is?” Tony asked, walking out of his office while still looking down at his tablet. 

Bucky let you pull back from him just far enough to answer Tony. “Next Thursday. You wanted to announce the new post-mission protocol for ‘Damage Control’.” You chuckled at the title, knowing Pepper was still trying to talk him into changing it. 

“Right! Thank you.” He finally looks up, taking in the sight of you in Bucky’s arms. “Barnes! Let her work.” He nearly whined, playing up the annoyance. 

“I will.” Tony leveled him with a pointed glare, looking between you and your computer. “I will! I just wanted to say good morning to my best girl.”

You scrunched your nose at the term of endearment, leaning farther back from Bucky to look in his eyes.

“You don’t like being my best girl?” He sounded genuinely concerned, earning a small chuckle from you. 

“I like being your only girl. Best implies that there are others, and though I would love to be the best of them, I don’t want there to be others.” You nodded your head resolutely, taking on a serious expression. 

“Please, you’ve had this man wrapped around your finger from the second he saw you.” Tony scoffed. 

“He’s right, doll. And you are my only girl. I love you.” Bucky pressed a quick kiss to your lips, letting you remove yourself from his arms to continue working. 

“I love you too. See you for lunch?” He nodded as he walked backwards to the elevator, keeping his eyes on yours until the doors closed.

“Wrapped around your finger, I swear.” Tony laughed when you glared at him, retreating back into his office to make some phone calls. 

-

Sometimes it’s really easy to pinpoint the exact moment everything went to shit. This was one of those times. 

22 minutes before you were due to meet Bucky for lunch, the red emergency lights started flashing with an accompanying alarm blaring in your ears. 

Friday announced “The compound is under attack, enacting lockdown protocol.”

“Shit.” Lockdown meant you needed to use specific codes to get into or out of any room. It definitely makes your life harder. 

Tony left to meet Pepper 15 minutes ago, so to your knowledge you were the only one on this floor. 

Glancing up and down the hall to double check, you swiftly enter Tony’s office, pulling up the security footage to see who you’re dealing with. Three different sides of the compound are surrounded by mercenaries clad in black fighting gear. 

You watch the screens, contemplating the best course of action to subtly help when one of the mercenaries pulls out a missile launcher. He aims it quickly, firing into the side of the building. 

You feel the walls shake as you watch part of the wall collapse, giving them an opening to enter the compound through. 

“Shit.” You run from Tony’s office, heading for the action without another thought even though this is definitely the biggest problem you’ve ever helped them with. 

You phase through the walls, doing your best to make sure nobody will see you when you come out on the other side of the wall. If all goes well, you’ll be back at your desk before anyone even notices you were gone. 

Your powers are a secret, even from the team. The powers that be, meaning your boss, don’t want the Avengers knowing they have an Angel on their side. It took you enough negotiating to get yourself assigned to this “project”, you were willing to do it without telling anyone that you are a angel. 

You basically had to beg your boss to let the Avengers be the people you watched over. Typically, angels are assigned to help those who can’t help themselves. Your logic for this assignment was that keeping the Avengers safe would, in turn, protect millions of other people. 

The one stipulation you faced when finally being assigned the the Avengers, was that you couldn’t tell them what you are.

At first, You had no problem keeping the secret. Being Tony’s assistant hardly meant spending ample time with everyone. You didn’t need to befriend them to keep them safe. At least, that’s what you kept telling yourself. 

Overtime, Tony broke down your walls. He convinced you to go to one of his galas, ultimately starting your demise. One look at Bucky had your heart soaring. Not telling him the truth has been eating away at you ever since he first asked you to get dinner with him. 

You pushed your guilt to the back of your mind, refocusing on getting closer to the attackers so you could figure out what to do. 

Typically, you use your powers to slightly change the path of bullets or hold off a bomb for a few extra seconds. It gives the team enough time to escape, not necessary unscathed, but with recoverable injuries. Plus, it keeps your powers hidden. 

It’s hard enough to hack into the video feed from various super suits without alerting anyone, you were definitely concerned about how to keep your powers hidden while using them so close to everyone. 

You skid to a stop just around the corner, listening as two of the mercenaries instruct the others. 

“Split up. You know who we’re looking for. If you find him, report in. First priority is getting out of here with him alive. All else fails, kill him.”

Immediately, you’re mind jumped to Bucky. Of course, Hydra scrum could be looking for anyone to use as a weapon, but Bucky made the most sense. When would they finally realize they can’t control him anymore?

You used your powers to confuse the men, making it look like whatever blueprints they studied were outdated. It would hopefully give everyone else enough time to get here and fight them off. 

You hid in a closet when you heard people approaching from behind you. 

“Sam, find Wanda and get to the east side. Nat and I will handle these guys.” 

You relaxed at the sound of Steve’s voice, waiting for the group to disperse before sliding out of the closet.

You ran back through the compound, heading for the lab. It was the closest place for you to retreat to in order to look through the security cameras again. 

“Friday, give me a rundown of what’s happening please.” You looked between the screens, intently listening to the AI’s voice. 

“The east side is being secured by Ms. Maximoff and Mr. Wilson. Based on projected outcomes, they will have everything under control in 7 minutes. Captain Rogers and Ms. Romanoff are fighting on the south side, near the blast sight. They will have the area secure in 6 minutes.”

You nodded, following along as you looked between the cameras. 

“The west side is secure. Mr. Stark and Mr. Barton have cleared the area and are holding off any additional attacks.”

“Good. Where’s Bucky?” You looked between the cameras, but couldn’t find him. 

“Sergeant Barnes is on the roof, engaged in hand to hand.”

“What the hell is he doing on the roof?” You panicked, clicking between camera angles until you could see him. 

There were ten Hydra agents on the roof, surrounding Bucky as he did his best to fight them off. 

“How did he get singled out so fast?” You mumbled to yourself, trying to think of a plan. They had Bucky backed up to the edge of the roof, slowly pushing him further and further. 

You could see what was about to happen nearly in slow motion. You acted quickly, not thinking about keeping your secret, but rather solely focused on helping Bucky. 

You broke through the window in the lab, wings appearing on your back as you flew to him. Just as you arrived, one of the agents shot him three times, propelling him backwards off the roof. Sending a shockwave over the roof, you knocked out the remaining agents as you dove, hurtling through the air to catch Bucky before he hit the ground. 

You grabbed him around the waist, lugging his body through the air with some difficulty. It wasn’t the most convenient position, plus you were slightly rusty from hiding your wings for so long. 

“Doll?” Bucky questioned, glancing at you through fluttering eyelids. “I knew you were my angel.” He whispered before his eyes fell closed, the blood loss getting to him. 

You swung around the building, re-entering through the broken lab window and laying Bucky on the lab bench. 

“Lifting lockdown protocol.” Friday announced, the noise barely registering in your ears. 

“Ms. L/N, Captain Rogers is requesting a check in from everyone on the team, would you like me to update him on yours and the Sergeant’s situation.” Friday asked. 

“Yeah, go ahead.” You muttered, not really paying attention to the question as you did your best to slow the bleeding. You haven’t tried healing anyone in years, so it was taking more effort than it should for you to fix this. 

You closed your eyes, hands hovering over Bucky’s body. Your wings were still present, although no longer fully extended. 

You channelled everything you could into healing Bucky’s wounds, drowning out any outside interference. Your hands began to glow, a warm golden light surrounding Bucky’s body as his bullet wounds healed. 

A few minutes passed as his wounds fully healed. You nearly collapsed from the relief of seeing him no longer bleeding out. His color was returning to normal, heartbeat speeding back up. 

“Y/N?” You jumped at the noise, turning around to see nearly the entire team staring at you. 

Your eyes went wide, hand still clutching Bucky’s as you stuttered in an attempt to come up with an explanation. 

“You have wings.” Wanda pointed out the obvious, everyone still wearing matching expressions of shock. 

You looked over your shoulder, nearly surprised by their presence on your back yourself. You had been so focused on healing Bucky, you forgot to hide them again. 

“Your hands were glowing.” Sam’s brow furrowed, looking between you and Bucky. 

You nodded, still unsure of what to say. 

Suddenly Steve barged into the room, unaware of the tension. He ran right for Bucky, yelling for someone to get a medic. 

“Why are you all just standing there? Friday said he was shot! Three times! Get a medic!” He looked at everyone in a panic before turning to look for wounds on Bucky. 

His brow furrowed as he tried to find any of the bullet wounds. “Wha- Where are the bullet wounds... He’s covered in blood, but not bleeding? Even we can’t heal that fast, what’s going on?” Steve turns back to the team, mouth slightly agape. 

They all point to you. 

Slowly, Steve turns finally noticing your presence. “Y/N?” He looks between the team and you again, a double take so fast it would have been funny if not for the situation. 

“You have wings?” He says it with much more confusion than Wanda’s point blank statement. 

You nod, voice still eluding you. You finally manage to get the wings to disappear. 

“Care to explain...” Tony asks, pointing to where your wings just were, your hands, and Bucky, “All of that?” 

Before you can reply, Bucky jolts awake with a groan. 

“What the hell?” He looks around the lab, taking everyone’s confused faces. Even Nat looks surprised. “How did I get here?” He rubs his abdomen, slightly sore from the bullets. 

Everyone shakes their heads, looking to you for answers. 

“Y/N?” He turns to you, hand squeezing yours slightly. “You were an angel. I thought I was dying...” He trailed off, trying to makes sense of everything in his head. 

“An angel?” Steve balks. Everyone else nods, various expressions of understanding on their faces. 

“I mean, that makes sense.” Nat chimes in, ready to accept it. “Wouldn’t be the weirdest thing that ever happened.”

“What?” Bucky asks, sitting up on the counter. “She’s not actually an angel. I just saw that as my... I don’t know, dying wish?” His face scrunched in confusion, trying to make sense of what he saw. 

“Well, I’m not dying and I saw the wings. And the glowing hands.” Clint speaks up, turning all eyes back to you. 

A voice in your head is suddenly booming. Your hands fly up to the sides of your head, trying to dull the ache of the screaming voice in your mind.

“Y/N L/N, you have broken the only rule bestowed upon you. According to contract 71, you are no longer permitted to enter the Angel Realm. Any attempts to return here will result in termination of your capabilities. Misuse of your capabilities on Earth or any other planet will result in termination of your capabilities.” Your boss’s voice was instantly recognizable. 

You didn’t notice the team crowding around you while you doubled over in pain, rubbing your temples as the message repeated. 

“Ugh, why did you have to say it twice?” You suddenly stared up at the sky, annoyed with the whole system. 

“Um, who said what twice?” Banner finally entered the lab, having been avoiding any anger inducing scenarios. 

Before anyone could jump in with what little knowledge they had, you started talking. 

“My Boss.” You winced, looking at Tony as he raised a brow. “My other boss... well, I guess not anymore. My former other boss.”

“Which is...” Tony gestured for you to continue. 

“Maybe you should all sit down, this could take a while...” 

Everyone followed as you lead them to the kitchen and living room. 

“Okay, I’ll just jump into I guess.” You took a deep breath, looking around the room at everyone’s curious and slightly impatient expressions. 

“I’m an angel.” You nodded, trying to reassure yourself that it was okay to say out loud. 

“Yeah, and? We figured that one out fifteen minutes ago.” Tony huffed, wanting more information. 

“Four years ago, I found out about the Avengers.” You looked at all of them, nervous for their reactions. “Angels are supposed to protect those who can’t help themselves, but I wanted to protect you all.”

“Why?” Steve asked, eying you curiously. 

“Would you all stop interrupting and let her explain!” Wanda whisper yelled, gesturing for you to continue. 

“It’s a valid question. Um, I guess I just thought you all put your lives on the line to help everyone else and I wanted to do what I could to help you. I convinced my former boss to let me come here. I told her protecting you guys would protect all the people you were bound to save, and that’s a lot of people.”

Everyone nodded, seemingly taking in the information. 

“I wanted to tell you. I really did, but it was my only rule. I wasn’t allowed to.” You nervously wrung your hands together, biting your lip as everyone took in the information. 

“That’s why it’s former boss?” Nat questioned. 

“Yes. She fired me?” It was a question to your own ears. “I’ve never heard of an angel being fired before. That kinda sucks.” Everyone chuckled at that. 

“And that was why you doubled over in pain in the lab?” Bucky questioned, concern in his voice. 

You nodded. “Yeah, she has a habit of yelling in my head. And she always says everything twice.” You glared at the ceiling again, knowing she had probably moved on from you already. 

“You’re not mad?” You looked back at Bucky, practically forgetting about everyone else in the room. 

“You caught me after I was shot off of a building and then healed my three bullet wounds. I think you’ve made up for the secret.” Bucky smiled, pulling you into his lap for a hug. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.” 

You nearly burst into tears at the relief you were feeling. “Oh thank God.” You squeezed him as tight as you thought he could handle, needing to feel him close to your for a second. 

You then turned to face the rest of the team, giving them an equally nervous look. “Are you guys mad?”

“Well, I didn’t get any magic healing.” Sam huffed, a smile on his face. 

“Nobody flew me around the compound.” Tony added on. 

“But, you can fly?” You gave him a confused expression. 

“Dammit” Tony muttered, thinking on his feet. “Tell you what, tell me what else you can do and we’ll call it even.”

“Deal... Maybe we can meet back here in half an hour?” You looked at their bruised and bloody bodies. “You all look like you could use a shower, and I for one would love to get this blood off me.” You gestured to the blood covering your jeans and shirt.

-

A half hour later, you were back in the living room. Tony ordered pizza, everyone crowding around the coffee tables and couches. 

“Alright. Get to it!” Tony called out, excitement clear in his voice. 

You stood up, turning to face the crowd. “Well, you know about the wings.” Your wings extended from your back with a woosh, spreading out before settling in a resting position. 

You heard various mutterings as everyone took in your wings in their full glory. You then floated slightly above the floor, wings gently flapping to keep you suspended. 

“How’s it feel birdman, her wings are part of her.” Bucky jested at Sam, a proud smile on his face.

“Yeah, well mine are bulletproof.” Sam sneered, a smile on his face. 

“Actually,” you winced, “Mine can be bulletproof. Basically, I can do whatever I want, but only for short periods of time. Like if someone surprise shot me, it would hurt. But if I was prepared, it would bounce off.”

“Wow.” Steve looked at you, a mixture of surprise and wonder in his eyes. 

“Um, I can also walk through walls, create shockwaves, move things with my mind, hack into any computer- although it takes some actual knowledge to not leave a trail... I mean, I’m pretty strong, but I don’t have much training for fighting hand to hand or anything. Oh, and mind manipulation? Not like mind control or anything, that is definitely frowned upon. Just... like earlier I made the Hydra agents forget the blueprints so they wouldn’t be able to get around the compound as quickly.” 

Everyone jumped in with questions. You answered every single one, talking well into the night. You did your best to give examples of your powers, like moving the rubble around to fix the giant hole in the south side of the compound. 

After a few hours, Bucky cut in. “Guys, she’ll still be here tomorrow. Wait, you will still be here, right?” He looked at you in a panic.

“Yes, unless you all want me gone, I’m here to stay.” You smile at them. 

“Good. Now as I was saying, she’ll be here tomorrow. Ask her the rest of your questions then. Hell, make a list if you want. Just let me take my best girl to bed.” Bucky pulled you up from the couch, leading you out of the room. 

“Goodnight!” You called back to the team before turning to Bucky. “What did I say about being your best girl?” You playfully hit his side. 

He pulled you into his arms, hugging you while you waited for the elevator. “I’m sorry. My only girl.”

“That’s better.”

Permanent taglist:

@averyhotchner @jesuswasnotawhiteman

[waywardnerd67]

Driving Soldier Boy Chap 5 - Take The Wheel

Title: Driving Soldier Boy - Take the Wheel Summary: After finding (Y/N) unconscious in her apartment, Jensen knows there is only one thing for him to do.   Main Characters: Jensen Ackles, Reader Other Characters: Jack Quaid Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader Rating: E - Everyone Warnings: Fluff/Descriptions of assault Word Count: 1707 A/N: The song for this chapter is “Drive My Car” by Jordan Knight & Nick Carter, Nick & Knight

Check Out: Driving Soldier Boy Masterlist

Jensen hopped into (Y/N)’s car waiting for Jack to come down from his apartment. The EPs, crew and other stars of The Boys had rearranged their shooting schedule for them to be able to go get (Y/N) from the hospital. It had been a week since Devin had found her unconscious and beaten within an inch of her life. She had emergency surgery to repair a collapsed lung from where her ex had kicked her repeatedly in the chest.

He barely brought himself to leave her side the first few days even though she was still in a medically induced coma. The only time he thought about leaving was when the police caught her ex trying to enter the hospital. It took Jack, Devin and two security guards blocking him from the entrance of the building. Any man that beat on a woman like that son of bitch had on (Y/N) deserve to get his ass kicked. In the end, he was thankful for them holding him back and not becoming the latest TMZ viral post.

She had woken up two days ago and Beks had let him know that she was able to come home today. He and Jack had something planned for her that would hopefully bring a smile to her face. Looking out the passenger window he finally saw Jack coming out of the front doors.

“About time Quaid…”

Jack huffed, shutting the car door behind him, “Sorry dude. My mom wouldn’t stop talking.”

Jensen raised an eyebrow at him at which his young friend held up his hand, “Don’t. Just don’t.”

He chuckled while taking off down the road towards the hospital. The trip was only twenty minutes and Jack was on his phone the whole time uploading the video Jensen had recently sent him.

“You two sound amazing together.” Jack mentions, his voice heavy.

“She’s the one with natural talent. I sing because I like to.” Jensen glances over to see him sigh, “Listen I know this is hard for you…”

Jack shakes his head, “It’s not really. (Y/N) told me on more than a few occasions where she stood as far as her feelings went for me. Honestly, I’m happy that she finally found someone she wanted to be with. I don’t know the details of her ex but the emotional damage she had because of him. Well, I’m just glad someone could break down some of her walls.”

“Well, she’s going to need a friend now more than ever. If she leans on you more than me, don't push her away. I’d rather her heal than add more to her already full plate.”

He caught Jack’s smirk as they pulled into the hospital parking lot, “And if she suddenly falls in love with me and not you?”

Jensen laughed, “Then all I have to say is if you break her heart, I will break you and no one will ever find you.”

For a moment, Jack looked truly terrified before a wide smile broke over his face, “I don’t think either of us are going to have to worry about that.”

They pulled the side of the building where he let Jack out. Beks was already inside with (Y/N) to help take her home. Little did she know that Beks was in on his little plan as well. He awaited Jack’s text that they were near the entrance to set the plan in motion.

One Month Earlier

“Do you think if Dean ever fell in love that he would let that person drive the Impala?”

Jensen chucked at her early morning question, “I honestly don’t know. He loved and cared for a lot of people, but hardly ever let anyone drive Baby. He barely let Sam drive her.”

They were stopped at a traffic light when she turned her head towards him, “Do you think Dean ever fell in love truly?”

This was one question he always hated from fans. He knew the answers everyone wanted him to give, but he could never lie to the fans. That is why he avoid the question like the plague. Now, looking over at (Y/N), her eyes shining in genuine curiosity of what he really felt, had the words flowing from his lips.

“I think he fell in love with everyone he came in contact with. No matter if it was love for his brother, or for his best friend or the random blonde he would sleep with. Dean loved people and fell in love with them.”

She started driving again, silence filling the space between them. His chest tightened and heart pounded as he awaited her response. When she did finally speak, he was in awe of how deep she could dwell into the small space where no one was meant to look in characters on a monster show.

“So, that’s why when the angels would tell Cas he fell in love with humanity and everyone referred to Dean. Essentially, for Cas, Dean was the heart of humanity because he loved people so much. Cas probably couldn’t help but take after Dean’s example and love humans as much as he did.”

(Y/N) looked over at him as his lips parted to say something but his mind went blank. Her laughter broke the chain of tense silence from around his chest.

“That is the best explanation I’ve heard for Dean and Cas’s profound bond.” His laughter joined hers, “Dean never needed an apple pie life because his apple pie life was always saving people, hunting things, the family business.”

“I can relate to that. Romantic love can get ugly quick, but family don’t end in blood, but it doesn’t start there either…”

Her lips curled into a smirk reciting the first line of one of his favorite quotes. He continued by saying the next line.

“Family cares about you. Not what you can do for them. Family is there for the good, bad, all of it.”

Together they finished the quote, “They got your back. Even when it hurts. That’s family.”

“My favorite quote.” She smiled fondly.

“One of mine too. What made you ask the question in the first place?”

A nervous chuckle came from her, “There’s a song by Nick Carter and Jordan Knight called ‘Drive My Car’. It’s about a guy giving the girl the keys to his car and driving until stars burn out the sky. I always think of Dean when I hear that song because I wonder who would have been special enough for him to drive up and hand the keys to Baby too.”

(Y/N) picked up her phone and scrolled until she found the song to play for him. A thought popped into his mind as he listened to her sing her lyrics.

You. He would hand you the keys in a heartbeat and never look back.

PRESENT DAY

We’re on our way out

The buzz from Jack’s text brought him back to the moment at hand. Jensen could see the front door from where he was parked and had that song ready to play. He watched as Beks came walking out and he dropped the car into drive hitting play.

Jack was pushing her in a wheelchair as Jensen parked in front of the entrance, the song blaring from the speakers with all the windows down. He stood up through the sunroof singing the first verse.

Girl if you say it's cool I can take you anywhere you want me to (want me to) Kick off your dancing shoes cause baby I'm about to hand the keys to you (keys to you) yeah I know that you wanna leave baby you and me I can see it in your eyes Top back put the ac on and the music up are you down to take a ride? woahh

Jack joined him for the chorus as Jensen went back down and out the driver’s side door.

Do you wanna drive my car tonight? (woahhh ohhh) We'll go until the stars burn out the sky (woahhh ohhh) Every turn every corner I'm closer to you Let's pull off to the side and just do what we do (woahhh ohhh) Do you wanna drive my car tonight?

Jensen opened the passenger side door as Jack sang and twirled her wheelchair around. A crowd of patients and staff were gathering at the main entrance to see what was going on. Beks was standing off to the side recording it all on her phone.

Girl lets get outta town baby I don't see no point in slowin down ohh Rev up the engine loud hold on tight I think that we both feel it now yeahh I know that you wanna leave baby you and me I can see it in your eyes Top back put the ac on the music up are you down to take a ride? woahh

They sang the chorus together once more as Jensen held out his hand to help her out of the chair. Scoop down he picked her up bridal style singing the bridge to her.

I'm runnin a stop light stayin up all night goin as fast as we can go I'm shiftin the gear down baby hold on now So here we go (woahhh ohhh)

He spun them around before carefully setting her on the passenger seat. Jack was singing the chorus as he jumped into the backseat with Beks. Jensen reached into his pocket for a set of replica Impala keys he had specially made when the idea popped into his head earlier that week. He whispered the thought he had a month earlier when he first heard this song.

“You. I would hand you the keys and never look back.”

She took in a sharp breath before squeezing the keys and his hand with hers, “T-Thank you.”

He kissed his cheek before heading around to the driver’s side. The crowd they had drawn were clapping and cheering as they drove off onto the main road. Jack and Beks were singing along to the next song on the playlist as Jensen reached over entwining his fingers with (Y/N)’s.

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[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED

Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.

Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.

damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool

from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man

OH SNAP

we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might

lol Muscular

you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah

so Deku is just standing there silently

typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave

okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward

so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”

“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing

okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick

okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit

lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories

anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all

which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao

anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk

so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK

anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf

(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)

...huh

lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices

dlkdkljk

just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply

OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK

SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay

I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY

PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!

OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS

something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works

ffjkkl

more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this

this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain

OMG IS IT HIS ARMS

IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT

OHHHHHHH

IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME

I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything

also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level

so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty

okay, several things

pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too

really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME

where the fuck did all this rope come from

not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this

is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK

-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!

rope = blackwhip

jetpack = float

radio = danger sense

and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter

so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever

WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM

okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week

anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS

VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO

-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings

OOOOOHHHHH

you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao

anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure

“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking

OH MY GOD DEKU

are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting

you guys he’s really doing it omg

Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh

I MEAN

WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk

FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO

but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that

uh oh

why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader

oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??

okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol

AHHHHAHAHA YESS

WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement

okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now

that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU

I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff

(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)

also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good

anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor

[mercy-burning]

Laundry Day

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Reader and Spencer meet again in the laundry room and decide to have some fun. PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 3 / PART 4 / EPILOGUE Category: Smut 18+ (oral sex- male and female receiving, unprotected penetrative sex, slight exhibitionism?/potential of getting caught, slight degradation) Warnings: sex, language. (As always, if there’s anything I missed, let me know what I should include in warnings. I want to be as mindful as I can about what I post. Thank you!) Word Count: 3k

Note: Surprise!! I was going to wait to post this on Saturday but Taylor Swift had me feeling like dropping a surprise, what can I say? 😂 Anyway, I wasn’t going to make another part to Pretty Please, but for one thing, it did way better than I was expecting, so thank you all for your kind comments and tags! And also, @rainsong01 mentioned something that gave me an idea for a laundry room scenario, so you can thank them for this one! I had so much fun writing this and I hope you like it! Thanks for all the love! 🥰

***

Y/N hated laundry day.

There was nothing more boring to her than loading clothes into the washer, waiting, then loading them into the dryer, waiting, and then folding them and putting them away, not to mention the laundry room was kind of dingy and felt like being in a gross, scary basement.

Thankfully though, years of living in the same building had given Y/N a pretty decent schedule of when the laundry room was empty. It wasn't like she disliked talking to people, but laundry made her cranky enough, and the last thing she wanted was human interaction, making small talk with building residents that acted like they cared to know about everyone else's business.

So it was Friday night, 7 pm, which meant that depending on if she had to work, the only other person in the laundry room would be Olivia from down the hall, someone Y/N had only had a few conversations with, either in the laundry room or on the way out the door.

She walked in, silently thanking the laundry gods after hearing complete and utter silence as she made her way to the washer and dryer to the far left of the room. Then she reached into her pocket and realized she forgot her phone. Cursing, she settled on basking in the silence as she loaded her clothes in the washer one by one, at least grateful that no one would be bothering her with pointless small talk.

Until she heard the door open, as if the laundry gods decided they were angry at her. She tried not to outwardly groan, hoping that whoever it was would just say, "Hello," and leave it at that. Or better yet, not say anything at all and let her do her own thing. So she closed the washer and entered the quarters, knowing that it would be a long ten minutes. She could have went back upstairs to her apartment and waited there if she really wanted to, or grabbed her phone at least, but it felt like it would have been pointless, and so she just hoped it wouldn't be awkward.

Maybe I'll just go walk around the building aimlessly for 10 minutes.

But the laundry gods had other plans, apparently.

"Y/N?"

She turned around and saw none other than Spencer Reid, clutching a large cloth bag, presumably filled with laundry.

"Spencer? Hi," Y/N greeted, a small blush forming on her cheeks. The two of them hadn't really talked since their... escapade about a month ago. Most of the time Spencer was at work, but whenever he was home there hadn't been anymore thin wall scenarios or overhearing something she shouldn't. They'd seen each other in the hallway a few times, winking as they passed, but that was it. Y/N had to wonder if maybe it was just a once-in-a-lifetime thing, being absolutely fucked into oblivion by your neighbor so good that you couldn't walk for two days.

Thinking about it made her cheeks burn hotter, so she cleared her throat and only slightly avoided eye contact. "I thought you did your laundry on Sundays?"

Spencer shrugged, walking over to the machine set next to hers. "Normally I would, but I just got back from work and I needed clean clothes. It's... pretty empty in here right now."

"Oh. Yeah, that's why I do my laundry on Friday nights whenever I can. Everyone's either out or staying in relaxing. Laundry's already boring enough, right, who needs annoying small talk?"

He laughed, opening the washer and putting in some of his clothes. "Touché."

Y/N wasn't really sure what to say after that, so she sat on top of the washer and crossed her legs, swinging them a little as she waited.

"Look, I know you've already given your stance on annoying small talk, but... What are your plans for the weekend?" Spencer asked, and she turned her head to meet his gaze, immediately feeling butterflies in her stomach.

"Um... Not a lot, really. Other than some grocery shopping and a few other small errands, I was going to have dinner with my mom on Sunday for her birthday. We might have to cancel though because she might have to go into work, but we'll see... What about you?"

He shook his head. "I don't have anything planned unless I get called into work either."

"Oh... Well, if you ever feel like having some company, you know where I live," she joked.

Spencer laughed. "I might just have to take you up on that. Things at work have been kind of... stressful."

Despite her better judgement, she smirked. "I seem to recall a similar conversation between the two of us not that long ago, Bud. You're not trying to fuck me again, are you?"

She just couldn't help herself. Admittedly she was a little worried she was too forward, but in the end it paid off, because he turned to look at her, shutting the washer and grabbing quarters from his pocket. "Would it be so wrong of me if I wanted to?"

The low tone of his voice made Y/N clench her legs tighter together, her mind racing with all the things that could happen in the next few days, the next few minutes even... She thought back to the last time he'd fucked her, seeing his face between her legs as he completely unraveled her. She felt herself growing wet at the thought.

"Absolutely not," she finally managed to respond. She hoped he would come over to her in a few long strides, pulling her in and kissing her right there, but instead he simply said, "Hmm," and turned back to his machine, putting in quarters.

He could have been playing games with her again, but she didn't want to take the chance. So she grew bolder and leaned back on her hands, puffing out her chest to the air and tilting her head to the side, letting her hair fall and exposing her neck to him. "Well, we have some time to spare, babe. What do you say we make the most of it?"

She was genuinely surprised to see him blush and freeze in his tracks, fumbling with the last few quarters as he inserted them into the machine and started the timer. "R-right now?"

"Duh," she replied, giggling.

"Somebody could come in... O-or hear us." A twinge of worry dripped from every syllable as he spoke, and though Y/N's first instinct was to apologize for suggesting it and letting it go, she thought better of it after remembering what got them into this situation in the first place.

So she scoffed. "Oh, please. You weren't the least bit worried about someone hearing us before. Y'know... When you promised to fuck me so hard I would scream your name and everyone could hear, and then I did? And besides, even if someone walked in right now, they'd probably just leave and come back later. People probably have sex with each other in here all the time."

"I doubt that, this place is filthy. Hardly the right setting for something so... intimate," he replied more clearly, obviously trying to win this argument. Though, something told Y/N he really was a little bothered about how dirty the laundry room was.

She shook her head. "You and I both know that what we did wasn't intimate. It was downright filthy, so if anything it works perfectly for where we are."

"Y/N, I don't know..." He chewed on his bottom lip and shuffled on his feet, refusing to look at her.

"Well, I'm not gonna force you to do anything you don't want to do, obviously, but... You can trust me. I've been doing my laundry here basically every Friday night since I moved here, and since Olivia is working tonight, she won't be here, and neither will anyone else."

"Well, I showed up, didn't I? Anything could happen."

She sighed, a little tired of arguing but still wanting to win. Her body tingled and practically ached at the sight of him, needing to feel his touch yet again. Maybe it was slightly pathetic, but if there was just the slightest chance that he would fuck her like that again, she had to try her damnedest.

So she had another trick up her sleeve, silently praying to the laundry gods that they would take pity on her and grant her this one thing. "You're right, but don't you think that you coming down here just moments after me was bound to happen? Like after everything we've experienced, we were always meant to have a quickie in the laundry room of our apartment building?"

He genuinely seemed to think about it for a moment before shrugging his shoulders. "Truthfully I think it's more of a coincidence than anything that we showed up here at the same time."

There's your chance, Y/N, don't fuck it up, she thought to herself, hoping that with the seductive tone in her voice and the puppy dog look in her eye, it would be enough to get her what she wanted. "I was joking. Of course it's a coincidence, I just want you to fuck me."

He only stayed silent, fiddling with his hands and his eyes flicking between her and the floor before he caught her eye. In another attempt to entice him, Y/N batted her eyes and slowly spread her legs wide, scooting back a little so she could rest her heels on the top of the washer. "Don't you want to fuck me into the washing machine, baby?"

That was the last straw, the thing that pushed Spencer over the edge. He whispered, "Fuck it," to himself before striding over to her and cradling her face in his hands, bringing her to him and kissing her hard. She initially yelped at how harsh he was, but after a second she melted into him, leaning forward and bringing him closer.

She tried to wrap her legs around his torso, but he grabbed them by the ankles and kept them spread open, pulling away to look into her eyes. "Keep 'em open, pretty girl." The old nickname made her whimper, just like he knew it would, and his gaze burned into hers hotly for a few seconds before he bent down, kissing her inner thigh just below the hem of her shorts. She sighed as he trailed his lips and tongue along every inch of skin, switching to the other leg and giving it the same attention until he was ready for more.

Rather than pulling off her shorts and underwear, Spencer simply pushed the fabrics aside and immediately licked a long, flat strip up her pussy, to which Y/N sharply inhaled and reached out, grabbing his hair. He explored her just as thoroughly as he had the last time, his fervor unmatched and absolutely intoxicating as he pushed himself closer and closer, practically living between her legs. Due to the short time constraint and fear of getting caught, he didn't waste time teasing her, and he seemed determined to finish before the buzzing of the washer signaled clean clothes.

Naturally though, he couldn't not tease her, so just as she was about to finish with his lips wrapped around her clit, he pulled away and left her breathless and frustrated.

"Really? We're doing this again?" she huffed, pouting.

Spencer unbuckled his belt and raised his eyebrow. "All in due time, sweetheart. Come here."

Unsurprisingly, she did what she was told, jumping off the washer and waiting further instructions. It didn't take long for Spencer to move, only a few seconds passing by before he turned her around and pushed her against the washer, to which she instinctively bent her torso over it. She gripped the sides of it tightly as he ran his hands up her shirt and caressed her back, eventually using one hand to grip her waist and the other to lift her leg up, setting it on the washer. She readjusted, reaching her hands forward to grip the top of it as he slid his hand down her leg and toyed with the fabric of her shorts.

"Listen carefully," he said, causing Y/N's heart to pound harder in her chest. "I'm clean. Are you?"

"Yes," she stated simply, loud and clear, though adding a hint of desperation as to hopefully speed the process along. She knew this communication was important, but damn if she didn't just want to be railed into next week already.

"Birth control?"

She swallowed nervously, hoping it wouldn't change his mind. "I'm not on it."

"Noted," is all he said, before deftly moving her shorts and underwear to the side and slamming into her with no warning. She yelped, leaning her head back as he pounded into her, the cold metal of the washing machine digging into her skin. It was the best kind of painful pleasure, only made better when he gripped her hair into a makeshift ponytail and yanked her to him, deepening his angle inside of her and hitting that sweet spot every time.

"Spencer, I'm..." She could barely breathe, and she loved it, already feeling herself start to unravel.

"Close already, pretty girl?" he purred in her ear, right before pressing a wet kiss to her neck as he craned her head to the side for better access. "Figures... You've always been so easy to please. Such a good, needy little slut for me, huh?"

Y/N groaned at the new name, and it spurred him forward, encouraging him to push them both further into the washing machine as he moved his hips harder. "Please," she gasped, only seconds away from losing herself.

"Tell me what you want," he growled in her ear.

She squeezed her eyes shut and spoke as clearly as she could, not caring how loud she was being. "I wanna cum! Please, Spencer, please!"

"Do it," he grunted, giving her a few more deep, purposeful thrusts to aid in her high. "I got you, pretty girl." That's what did it for her. She yelled out as her body tensed and her walls fluttered around him, everything absolutely burning and blinding until eventually she was spent.

Spencer held himself inside of her for a few seconds, bringing himself closer to the edge before he roughly pulled out and away, leaving Y/N empty and alone. She was tired as hell and completely fucked out, but still she wanted more than anything to help him, ever the needy little slut, as he'd so eloquently called her. So she turned around, peeling herself away from the washing machine and dropping to her knees in front of him, not waiting for him to say anything.

She promptly leaned forward and wrapped her mouth around his cock, wasting no time hollowing her cheeks and setting a fast pace sucking him off. It had somewhat taken him by surprise, but he welcomed it, gathering her hair away from her face and watching as she went to work, practically worshipping the ground he stood on. Eventually she pushed herself all the way forward, allowing him to hit the back of her throat. Instead of pulling back to breathe, she held herself there and gagged, looking up at him with tears in her eyes before removing herself, taking two deep breaths, and going right back to work.

"Look at you," he mused, his voice barely there but with enough volume that allowed Y/N to hear him. "You look so good, pathetic and choking on my cock. Such a good fucking girl, fuck—"

In no time he was gripping her hair tighter and his breathing started to falter. Y/N held herself still as he came in her mouth, most of it hitting the back of her throat and all of it coating her tongue. She moaned around him, blinking tears away and running her hands over his ass until he pulled away from her and let go of her hair.

Standing up, Y/N swallowed most of his cum but purposely let some of it spill out of her mouth and down her chin, to which she used her middle finger to scoop it up and slide it back into her mouth. She kept eye contact with him the whole time, watching as his tongue flicked over his bottom lip before he bit it softly.

Once she was done cleaning herself up, Y/N ran a hand through her hair and smiled. "See, that wasn't bad at all. No trouble."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure the only trouble is you. Eavesdropping, making me fuck you in a semi-public place, et cetera..." He laughed as he pulled his pants up and re-adjusted himself as though nothing had happened.

"Don't act like you don't like it," Y/N teased, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing a deep kiss to his lips. He laughed against them, pulling her closer by her waist and resting his hands there when she pulled away.

As if to signal the end of their... whatever they were going to call it, Y/N's washer buzzed and she turned around to attend to her laundry. As she transferred the clothes from the washer to the dryer, Spencer came up behind her and brushed the hair away from her neck.

"You know, I wasn't trying to be mean or anything when I... called you a slut. I would never want to be mean to you or anything, and I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable."

Y/N almost laughed, amused again by how dominant he was during sex but then immediately a big 'ol softie once it was over. It was such a fun contrast, and truthfully, as much as she loved his dominant side, she wanted to see more of his softer one. So she turned around to meet him and caressed his cheek, smiling kindly. "I know you don't mean it to be mean. It was hot. And I appreciate you checking up on me, it's sweet. You're sweet."

Before he could say anything, his washer buzzed. So he settled on leaning forward, kissing her cheek, and walking away to do his laundry.

The two of them worked in silence for a while, just enjoying each other's company until they realized they both had to wait for the dryer. 20 minutes.

"Round two?" he asked her with a mischievous grin.

Y/N returned it and took a step towards him when the door opened, laundry gods be damned.

"Oh, hey guys!" Olivia from down the hall chirped as she walked in, striding to her own station.

At least they had the rest of the weekend.

[astridthevalkyrie]

25 with Levi??

okay, so there's this oneshot or series of oneshots i've been meaning to write for a while, and this prompt lines up, so here's the first part to that. i will probably rewrite/repost this when/if i post a full oneshot. consider this a promo!

25. “Hey hey hey, look at me.”

requests are closed!

"Darling," you begin, not quite sure how to put this nicely, "one of the things I love most about you is the stability you bring to my life."

Levi nods, as though to say he knows that very well. You like to think that sometimes your boyfriend can hear your thoughts before you even think them.

However, maybe there are some thoughts that you should have actually said out loud, just so he got the memo.

"So I'm very confused," you continue, slightly frenzied, "as to why you thought that adopting a literal child without telling me first would be a good idea."

Levi is clearly not used to being chided, being the incarnation of perfection itself that you know him as. He looks just as conflicted about how to apologize as you do about how to reprimand him. A couple of feet away, a kid, a child, a kindergartner of all things, sits on the couch, playing with your stress cube quietly, oblivious to your conversation.

"I'm his godfather, and I hardly knew what was happening until it happened. Shit, I hadn't spoken to Grisha or Carla in years, I had no idea about the car accident. I didn't even know they put me as his godfather until this morning. The last time I saw that kid was when he was born, and that's it."

"The last time I saw that kid was never, because I didn't know his parents, Levi! Do you expect me to just drop out of college to raise him?"

"Jesus, no. You don't have to do anything, let me take care of it. I'll take a break semester, work double shifts and try to find a daycare nearby during the day so I can watch him at night during your evening classes. You don't have to do a single thing, okay?"

He's trying to placate you, and it works, because really, how could it not? Of course, you don't want to raise a kid, at least not right now when the both of you trying to get through law school and working at the same time, but you can't be angry with Levi for proving what a kindhearted person he really is at his core. The two of you are somewhat known as a very cynical couple, and there had once been a widespread rumor that if someone were to ever be in a threesome with you two, they would leave in tears. Where that rumor came from you have no idea, but whatever its origins, you know it's not true, simply because Levi has never been remotely as cruel as people make him out to be. Is he dry as hell, mean with a resting bitch face that puts most people off? Yeah. But he's got one of the sweetest hearts that you've ever seen, and you know that he could never reject someone who needs his help.

As Levi watches you consider everything through, a defeated look covers his features, and with a feather light touch, he reaches up to place his palm against your cheek. "Hey," he mumbles softly, "I know this is a lot. I'm sorry for springing it on you. If...if it's too much, you don't have to feel obligated to deal with it."

You furrow your brows in confusion. What?

"I don't want this to ruin the good thing we have going." A really good thing, you remind yourself, as he looks down, almost forcing himself to continue. "But more importantly, I don't want to fuck up your life with a decision I made. So if you want to leave, if you need a break, if you have to...whatever, you don't have to feel trapped by this."

"Hey hey hey, look at me." Your own hands cup his cheeks, tugging him up to make him look at you. "Give me some credit, baby. I said stability was one of the things I love about you, not the only thing. I'm a little pissed, yeah, and really overwhelmed, but I'm not going anywhere. I love you."

It's not something the two of you say to each other often, mostly because you never need to. You say it in other ways, like how when you get back from your night classes he stays up so he can warm up dinner in the microwave, or how you always organize your schedule around the cleaning regime Levi has on Saturday mornings, because you know how important tidiness is to him.

Levi looks relieved, so relieved that he presses a short kiss to your lips, conscious of the child in the room. There's no certainty here, you have absolutely no idea how two grad students who have to work their asses off to make ends meet are going to raise a child, but with Levi, you're willing to try, and that's what matters.

[lululawrence]

Can u please be nicer on ao3? Maybe you should try answering people's comments

when i read the first line i was honestly flabbergasted and wracking my brain trying to figure out when in the world i wasn't nice on ao3 ever. because i honestly truly try to be nice to everyone always, even when i'm angry or frustrated or people are going after those i love and want to protect. if there was a time i WASN'T nice on ao3, i wondered if it was maybe because my comment had been misunderstood or someone saw me razzing an author i'm good friends with and they didn't get that we are close and i said what i did with so much love and appreciation, you know? like what??? did i do???

but then i read your second line. and please forgive me if i come off as rude in my response to this, because honestly i'm in a pretty bad spot mentally and emotionally in general right now, but PARTICULARLY today, and this ask triggered an anxiety response in me. so. i'm trying really hard to word this in a way to educate without being condescending or mean, but i might not succeed.

firstly, thank you for your comments i'm assuming you've left. i'm also assuming they were nice comments, in which case extra thanks. i'm sure i'll send you effusive responses on ao3 when the time comes.

secondly, please understand that sending an ask like this, on anonymous no less, is incredibly entitled. writing is not my profession, i receive no compensation for my works that i post for free online, and as a part of that it is not required of me to respond. i do my very best to reply to every comment i receive, but it is not always in a timely manner, because i have other priorities in my life. all of which leads us to my third point, which is:

writers do not owe you a reply to your comments. end of. there are no other qualifications or quantifying modifiers to be added to the statement. is it nice to be acknowledged and know your comment was seen? sure. but do they OWE you one? hell no.

in fact, i'd like to offer you a suggestion. a way of tweaking your thinking about the comments you leave on fics. instead of looking at comments you leave as being something that deserves a reply from the author, think of your comments as your way of paying the author for the gift of their time and talents that they have shared with you by posting their fic. that's how i think of the comments i leave for authors. i'm giving them my thanks for the words they've shared! i want to help THEM feel as amazing as they have made ME feel when i read their fic. in fact, my hope isn't necessarily a response from them, but instead my hope is THE GIFT OF THEM SHARING MORE FIC WITH ME. i'm a selfish bitch in that way and i always want all the fic to read. i never want that well to go dry. one way i can ensure that doesn't happen is by supporting authors and being kind to them and spreading all the love and excitement i can about their writing in the hopes that my words will inspire them to share more.

because whether they reply or not, i GUARANTEE they are seeing your comments. i PROMISE they are. and for all you know, your comment might be the one that keeps them writing even when their words aren't coming easily or when they are tempted to give up.

but, again, please remember that no matter what, these authors (including me) don't actually owe you anything.

the rest of this is going under a cut, because honestly my reply is already far too long and i have a LOT more to say now that you've gotten me started.

now, all of this in mind, i'll explain to you why i'm not great with keeping up with comments made on my fics the last couple of years. i don't owe you this explanation any more than i owe you a response to your comments, and i'm honestly not sure you deserve this explanation either, but i'll still offer it anyway. it'll help me feel better knowing i at least put this out there, whether you care or not, mainly because if i don't do that it will cause me greater anxiety having you possibly think i am not responding to people because i feel all high and mighty or that i think i'm better than the comments or whatever the fuck kind of motivation you're attributing to me to see my lack of a response as something "not nice" towards the commenters.

i'm not sure if you've noticed, but i put out a lot of fic. like a lot. a lot of words and shit. i love writing, it's often my therapy and a way for me to help keep my anxiety and depression and ptsd at bay.

now, more personal shit for you, i've got three kids ages 9 and under. the oldest has adhd which we have yet to find a med for that helps to the extent she needs without side effects that aren't healthy for her to continue with, she also has anxiety, AND she's extremely gifted and starting a new program at a new school, all in the midst of a pandemic. and all of those situations exacerbate her anxiety! huzzah! she's also dealing with the beginning of her tween growing up shit, which is great fun because it means where she used to be pretty damn understanding of her younger brother, she is finding it much more difficult to. because the second oldest? he's autistic with some pretty significant gross motor, speech, and socialization delays that have only been exacerbated because of the previously mentioned pandemic. PLUS he transitioned from his special needs preschool to a fully integrated elementary school for kindergarten last year and then had to deal with all the ups and downs of the switch from e-learning to hybrid to all in schooling when everything in him screams for a normal schedule he can rely on to keep his own anxieties and fears and struggles at their minimum. and that youngest child? he was born in january of last year. he STILL barely leaves the house and has only met other children in close range a couple of times because, once again, pandemic!

add onto all of this my own mental health issues, the fact that my husband ALSO battles major clinical depression, adhd, and anxiety, AND we live with my parents who have their own health issues, both mental and physical. i run the home for our house of seven. i keep this place functioning, fed, clothed, clean, and everywhere we need to be for all of our five million appointments every. fucking. day. there is a REASON i've been borderline burnt out for the last fucking year and a half.

now, for fun, i have fandom shit. i love it here, even if it is a dumpster fire on the best of days, and getting to be a part of the writing community is so very lovely. i adore it. honestly, it's because of those friendships i've built with other writers that i have been able to keep writing and have found just how helpful it can be for my mental health. but i'm REALLY. INCREDIBLY. BUSY. i hardly have time to get on tumblr for just a quick swipe through my dash most days. i put off asks so long i forget i have them. i don't have the mental and emotional capacity to talk to people on here or interact fully a lot of the time. but i do my best to do so and be kind while i'm at it even when i don't want to be.

then, on top of that? i also run fic fests like @wordplayfics and help friends run their own. because not only am i a writer, i'm a reader. i LOVE fic. fic has saved me soooooo many times over the past seven years that i've been here. i want to do what i can to support other writers the best way i can, which is to provide a space for them to create their works that welcomes and helps promote them, but also by doing my monthly fic lists and pocast highlighting what i've been able to read, reblogging their fic posts, and then commenting and kudosing their fics too.

sometimes i get really fucking down on myself because i'm so behind on replying to comments, but my brain is very much a "if you start this, you have to finish it" kind of a brain, and i feel even WORSE sometimes if i reply to comments on some fics and not all of them. but i do my best and reply when i can. i was actually really fucking proud of myself because i had a couple days to myself in june, and i spent hours replying to comments on 20 of my fics. when you have almost 150 fics (i think? i don't even know how many fics i've posted by now), that is only scratching the surface. but i tried and i was so so happy i did that many fics at once. it's exhausting, though, and takes a lot of spoons for me to reply to them in mass like that plus time consuming. so i tried to be happy with those 20 fics and the comments i responded to there and told myself that when i ha a moment to breathe, i'd go and work on replying to some more.

but see, that again causes anxiety and guilt. because i haven't replied to all of them. and that anxiety and guilt can cause me to put it off further OR to put off important things like feeding my children or getting sleep in order to finish it, so i have to make myself put things into perspective and ensure i'm doing the important things, like taking care of myself and my family, first.

and then, i have a moment where i CAN go ahead and reply to comments... but i also have MANY fics that are on deadline and i actually have a schedule. a SCHEDULE. for when i'm going to focus on which fics. i can spell it out for you if you really want. i made it back in APRIL to make sure i didn't sign up for too many fic fests because there are so many going on right now that i want to participate in, but i know i can't do all of them so i had to pick and choose. and when you are SO overscheduled and busy that back in APRIL you had to figure out what fics you would focus on at what time to ensure you got everything written when you wanted to through THE END OF THE YEAR, more choices have to be made.

for example. my writing time and time for myself came down to only one evening a week for ALL fandom things i'm doing and a part of right now once the kids were out of school for the summer. it quickly became apparent that for my own self care i needed more time, so i worked with my husband to find two other days i could carve out at least 30-60 minutes to myself to write every week. and i did. but if i'm already only getting that much time and have committed to those fics and fests and things that you're running etc, you have to choose am i going to use this time to try to squeeze in some comment replies? or am i going to write? and i choose to write. simple as that.

so yeah. see it as selfish if you want. see it as mean. you can honestly see it as whatever the fuck you want, but for me? i know that as soon as i possibly can and i can breathe freely for once and not feel like i am constantly drowning in my day to day life and am doing pretty well when it comes to my fic deadlines and getting started on those christmas cards i'm once again going to be making by hand for everyone on tumblr who chooses to sign up for one this year out of the KINDNESS of my heart and the love i really do feel for so many of you, then i promise i'll be on ao3 catching up and commenting. my friends laugh and make fun of me for it sometimes, because they will sometimes get 10-12 replies to their comments in a single day. they know that's how i work. i WILL reply to every single comment i get, no matter how old it is. but for the love of all that is holy, do NOT add to the anxiety and guilt i already feel over it. the only place that will get you is the ask/comment getting deleted if it's a good day, a fucking long rant like this one if it's not, and a block if it's a REALLY bad day.

if you're asking me to be nice on ao3, then i ask in return that you also be nice by not demanding things of people that they are not in any way obligated to give.