#I’ll probably do some edits before i post it to ao3 lol

[daboyau]

And another rise hunger games chapter! Wow, just training and interviews to get through, and then the real fun begins. First person to correctly guess who the president is gets a prize or something idk

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tag list! as always, let me know if you’d like to be added or removed. 💚 thank you to everyone who reads and interacts with my stories. I definitely wouldn’t be updating as often or as eagerly without you guys.

@boots-with-the-fur-club @theonlybrightowl @dandywonderous @dandylovesturtles @elijah-doodle @fredquinn @sady-is-secretly-an-alchemist @heckitall @beannary @brightandfullofglory @purplepixel @pomelined @imagionationstation @daughterofskylark @eb177 @lilysplash @burritello3000 @midwesternvibes @justchillininthebackground-06

The roar of the crowd is deafening as they emerge into the City Circle. Donnie doesn’t drop to his knees and cover his ears, no matter how much he may want to. Kendra presses herself subtly closer to his side, making his skin crawl as she tests her weight slightly against his arm, and once she’s confident that he isn’t going to let her fall, she lifts both arms high in the air in a dramatic flourish that has the crowd going wild. 

Well, that just won’t do. The competition for attention (and for their lives, though he’s trying not to think about that right at the moment) has begun, and Donnie has been a middle child for far too long to let someone else win. With a hand still bracing her, he lifts his free hand high to call attention to himself, then sweeps into a graceful bow as he uses that hand to flip the train of his costume and show off the way the scales shift and change with his movements. The excitement that gets him makes Kendra elbow him hard, digging into the leftover bruises from when Kendra had tackled him. Despite the slight sting, he turns to smirk down at her, smug as she glares back. He’s grateful for the distraction. It makes it feel a little easier to ignorr the ever increasing urge to start screaming.

White and yellow chrysanthemums rain down all around them, carpeting the streets and getting crushed beneath the wheels of the chariots. Donnie sputters as one nails him in the face, and when Kendra tilts her head back and laughs, he forces himself to do the same, all too aware of the eyes and the cameras trained on them. Kendra plucks it from where it had fallen to his shoulder and tucks it behind her ear, grinning at him with a gleam in her eyes before turning a bright smile towards the cameras. More cheers, and suddenly the flowers raining down around them feel a lot more intentional. Oh, she is good. 

There’s not much room in the chariot for them to do much more than wave or bow, or make a few subtle gestures at one another as they try to disguise jostling and thrown elbows as incidental closeness. Every time either one of them does a little half-twist or bows, the crowd goes crazy as their costumes ripple and change in a complimentary dance of beautiful colors. For one stupid moment, Donnie can almost forget what’s at stake; this just feels like hassling April or his brothers over the last piece of a birthday cake or for their dad’s attention. It is stupid and childish and all the meanness without any of the malice. It’s almost nice. 

And then the feeling of a new set of eyes on him sends a prickling up his spine. This gaze is different. It is not the attention of the thousands of cheering fans, or even the grave watchfulness he can almost imagine he feels from the District people settled in their homes, watching the proceedings on their holoscreens. It is cold and dangerous and close. 

Donnie snaps upright from his latest sweeping bow, careful to maintain his facsimile of a smile as sharp eyes sweep the crowd for the source of the gaze. He knows that it is foolish to actually believe that he can pick out or even feel a single glare amongst a crowd of over one hundred thousand, but he doesn’t know how else to classify the sudden creeping, choking sensation that has crawled up his spine and circled his neck like a noose. Alarm bells are ringing inside his head, drowning out all other sounds.

He scans the crowd, taking in the gleeful smiles and hungry excitement, before his eyes finally settle on the massive raised platform that they are barreling towards. The presidential mansion looms above them, bright and beautiful and utterly sterile. Lights are projected onto its side, fake fireworks exploding over the bone white surface in a colorful facsimile of true celebration. Standing high above them all, the president stares out with an expression that Donnie can only think of as regnant. He is impassive as he watches the proceedings, and indifferent to the fact that he holds so many lives in the palms of his hands. He is completely confident in his control of the situation and the people as he stares down at 24 soon-to-be killers. The distance between the procession and the presidential manor is still far too great for Donnie to delude himself into thinking that their eyes can meet, but he still shudders when that cold gaze passes carelessly over him. He knows where that sense of danger is stemming from now. 

Though his features are wizened and long greyed with age, the president still cuts an imposing figure. He has not let power make him soft. The cushion of Capitol living hasn’t done anything to dull his sharp edges. 

Not that Donnie is surprised, really. The man has been in power since before papa was born; an impressive feat, considering the immense power struggle that had occurred after the first rebellion failed. From what papa has told him - and what the cobbled together and highly sanitized history lessons have conveniently left out - there were an impressive number of assassinations during that time. He would have had to be sharp to survive. Unless, of course, he was the one ordering said assassinations in the first place.

Donnie narrows his eyes as they draw closer to the man who has created an age of prosperity for Panem, and has kept the Districts crushed thoroughly beneath his heel. He’s always looked minatorial during every holoscreen appearance he’s made, and papa used to warn them all of his propensity towards cruelty in hushed, fearful whispers. Donnie had never questioned his father’s words, but he hadn’t realized before now just how accurate those statements had been.

He keeps the smile in place, even as the lump in his throat grows and threatens to stop his breathing. He can’t tear his eyes away from the platform, or the figure standing atop it, flanked by his counsel. They watch the procession with a detached interest, like the children they are sending to their deaths are nothing more than pawns to be moved across the board.

Those cold eyes settle upon their chariot, raking over the beautiful costumes and sparkling gems, assessing the Tributes encased within. The president doesn’t seem impressed. He turns his attention on to the next set quickly, and Donnie feels tension prickle across his muscles as their chariots begin to slow, raising goosebumps across his bare skin as each one settles upon its predetermined spot before the presidential mansion. 

The crowd falls silent as the president steps closer to the podium, the slight electronic feedback of his microphone enough to have the entirety of the Capitol holding its breath. Donnie does his best not to wince at the sound as it needles at his skin and scratches uncomfortably inside his brain. The president’s eyes sweep over the gathered tributes again, slow and thoughtful. He does not smile, but he does incline his head at each chariot, as if acknowledging each individual District. 

“We gather today, to welcome our tributes,” he says, his deep voice soft but commanding the attention of the crowd with enviable ease. Donnie can almost feel each onlooker sit up a little straighter. “We salute each of you for your courage and your strength.”

The crowd erupts into applause, more subdued now than the previous raucous cheers and screams, but no less enthusiastic. The president smiles, just the slightest tick of his lips, and his gaze moves slowly over the crowd before snapping back towards the gathered tributes once again.

“We honor our tributes,” he says slowly, as his eyes come to rest directly upon Donnie. “—and their families. We recognize the sacrifices made for the sake of peace and prosperity. We thank you.” 

His gaze moves on, but the feeling of it lingers. Donnie stays frozen, fingers digging hard enough into the handrail that he can almost feel the flimsy metal warp beneath his grip. His heart is pounding. The lights are too bright. Everything is so loud.

He just wants to curl up in the familiar comfort of his own bed, tucked beneath the weight of his blankets. He wants Mikey to sit on his thighs to to provide much needed pressure while he hides away in the darkness of his covers. He wants Raph to hum and rub careful, comforting circles on his back. He wants Leo—

Well. He just wants to be home. He wants his family. 

“We wish you all a happy Hunger Games,” the president says serenely. “And may the odds be ever in your favor.”

The crowd cheers. Fanfare plays. The fake fireworks pop and explode all across the walls of the mansion, painting it bloody red and fire orange. Donnie stares at the bursts of color, wishing the fires were real. The president stares back, eyes narrowed like he knows the thoughts inside his head. 

The chariots begin to move with a lurch that nearly sends Digi and Gizmo stumbling off the back of theirs, and has Kendra clutching at his arm to keep her balance. He can almost feel that chilling gaze lingering as they ride away. Kendra bumps him gently with her shoulder, and when he turns to look at her, she gestures for him to lean down. He obliges, mostly out of the desire for a distraction from the creeping unease.

Her lips brush the shell of his ear as she whispers, “That speech was total bullshit, huh?” 

His smile feels a little more real all of a sudden. 

.

There is a stranger waiting for them when the elevator doors slide open to reveal their fourth floor apartment. He is seated primly upon the pristinely clean and stupidly shaped sofa, ankle crossed over his knee, hands folded in his lap, head held high. He is invading the only marginally safe or private space afforded to them within the Capitol, and it rankles how much he looks like he belongs within this stupid fancy apartment.

He assesses them as they pile off the elevator, Donnie and Kendra both shuffling awkwardly forward as they clutch at the trailing fabric of their costumes to keep it from getting caught in the elevator door. They each keep a wary eye on him, suspicious of the interloper in their apartment. Atomo goes silent when she sees their visitor, her excited chattering about their Chariot Ride and the burgeoning sponsor interest cutting off with a sharp gasp. Donnie glares at the stranger, who surveys him with an expression that he has no idea the meaning of in return. He looks…excited, maybe? But that doesn’t quite fit. Certainly not upset, but not happy either. There’s a strange shininess to his eyes as they focus on Donnie’s face. He wishes Mikey or Leo were here to tell him what that expression means.

The stranger doesn’t stand until papa steps out from behind the cover of their small crowd. His eyes light up, yet his lips pulls down into a frown. He smoothes the fabric of his skirt and crosses his arms, muscles bulging in a way that even Donnie can tell must be purposeful. Yikes and gross. Talk about desperate. 

“Draxum,” Yoshi says, his voice low and full of a quiet rage that Donnie rarely gets to hear. His hands flex at his sides before curling into tight fists. Donnie steps to the side, train dragging in his wake and shimmering even in the dim apartment lights, intent on keeping both of them in his sights. As if sensing the brewing danger, Kendra and Atomo both hurry to join him, standing a few feet back like they hope he’ll act as a buffer.

“Yoshi,” the man returns, sounding more amused than angry, which tells Donnie all he needs to know about who holds the power between the two of them. The stranger’s eyes narrow as they move slowly up and down Yoshi’s body. It’s something that he’s seen done to his father before, but it makes Donnie’s skin crawl worse than usual this time. “I see you are as pathetic as ever. Maybe even moreso than usual, considering the…special guest this year.” 

Donnie stiffens as those sharp golden eyes drift towards him once again. Draxum’s lip curls, and if he didn’t know any better Donnie might have said that it almost looks like a smile. He stares back, too exhausted to bother trying to force even the barest hint of emotion into his expression. His papa hisses between his teeth, sharp and deliberate, and Draxum’s attention snaps back towards him immediately. 

“What do you want?” he snaps, and though Draxum has a significant height advantage, he somehow manages to look down his nose at him in the way only someone who knows their own strength can. This time, the twisting of Draxum’s lips can only be a smile, small and cruel as it is.

“There has been a report that your son requires medical intervention,” Draxum says, slow and soft, and Donnie feels his stomach drop at the way those words make his father’s face go all twisted and pale. He really doesn’t want to deal with this right now. 

So he won’t. 

“I’m going to shower,” he announces, refusing to meet any of the eyes that snap towards him. “If you’re still hanging around when I’m done you can look at my back then.” 

And then he turns and stomps away, ignoring the voices that call after him as he goes. It feels good to slam the bedroom door behind him, and as silence falls over the room he finally feels like he has a chance to catch his breath. Leaning against the door just in case anyone decides to follow him, he takes a moment to just try to breathe. His eyeballs feel hot and his chest feels tight. He can hear the blood rushing in his ears as his heart pounds, echoing the dull throbbing at the base of his skull. There is an uncomfortable tingling in his fingertips. 

Thankfully, no one tries to follow him. There is no pounding at the door or jiggling of the knob. He’s not sure what he would have done if someone did try to get in, but he’s sure there would have been blood. Exhaling slowly, Donnie steps towards the bathroom, mindful to stay close to the wall and out of the range of the camera’s ever watchful eye. Glittering gems trail in his wake, silent as they fall to the carpet. The sting as they’re pulled from his skin feels good. It feels real in a way very little else has today. 

He leaves the beautiful, glittering gown in a heap on the bathroom floor. His hands are steady as he turns the faucet, water gushing forth and filling the air with steam almost immediately. For a long while, he sits on the side of the tub and just watches the water as it circles the drain, breathing in the steam and the lingering smell of the shampoo he used when he last showered.

The water burns when he finally steps beneath its strong spray. His back tingles at the heat and the pressure, but it does not hurt. He thinks about the stranger in the living room, and wonders what he plans to do during the so-called medical intervention. His hands do not shake even though his lungs feel too small inside his chest. He takes his time. Thankfully the Capitol never runs out of hot water.

When he leaves the quiet sanctity of the bathroom, he’s not surprised to find Draxum in his room. The man is standing by the floor to ceiling window, which has been made clear again, and is staring at the city beyond. There’s something thoughtful and fond in his gaze, though Donnie couldn’t begin to guess at what he might be thinking as he looks out at the glittering expanse of white and silver. He clears his throat, impatient to get this over with, and Draxum turns slowly to face him.

“I’d rather this be fast,” he says simply, arms crossed tight over his chest, refusing to look Draxum in the face. 

“It should be a simple matter, as long as you haven’t caused any undue damage to yourself,” Draxum concedes with a tip of his head. Dark pink hair cascades over his shoulders with the movement, silky and long. Teal lines his eyes and lips, a strangely vibrant pop of color against his dark skin and dull grey clothes.

“Close the window.” 

Draxum arches an eyebrow at being ordered around but thankfully complies, and the late evening sunlight is dampened as the window goes opaque again. Donnie grits his teeth and stands by the foot of the oversized bed, wishing there was a chair or a desk or something besides a bed in this stupid room. He feels vulnerable. He hates it. 

“Shirt off,” orders Draxum, and the cold clinical tone he uses is actually almost enough to soothe some of the nerves sparking inside Donnie’s chest, screaming that this situation holds the hallmarks of both stupid and dangerous. Donnie shrugs his shirt off, but keeps it clutched tightly in his hands. Draxum slips on a pair of gloves, not looking at him. “Turn so I can examine your back.”

There is no gasp of shock as he takes in the scarred expanse of flesh and the metal exo-spine. He doesn’t even hum with interest or ask how a boy from the Districts could have come into possession of such a piece of technology. All he does is press forward, far too close for Donnie’s comfort. He can feel each of the man’s cool breaths on his back and feel the press of latex covered fingers as he examines the seam where skin and metal meet. Donnie grits his teeth and tries not to snap. 

“You don’t seem surprised by it,” he says instead, eyes trained on the ceiling, trying to take deep breaths to calm himself. Draxum scoffs, and his fingers press a little harder, almost to the point of pain. His gloved hands trace the metal spine, and Donnie feels his legs tingle. He hates it he hates it he—

“Why would I be surprised?” Draxum demands as he prods at one of the keloid scars on his shoulder. “I made it, after all.”

[theglamorousferal]

The Cryptid of Smallville

I am posting the first couple chapters of the fic that I am currently working on juuuust in case AO3 goes down again. In the next couple days I’ll start posting some of my wips that I don’t think I’ll finish. If any of them inspire people to write more then I’ll be happy. 

I had the thought a while ago about what if Danny was raised alongside Clark Kent and the hijinks that would result in Danny being near the liminal space that is cornfields. These are basically a series of connected one-shots because I am not that great at trying to do a real plot lol

Without further ado, here’s the first chapter of the Cryptid of Smallville! (Small edit: here’s the link to AO3 the first two chapters are there)

______________________________________________________________ The night sky was clear and open above the cornfields as a gentle breeze caused the plants to stir. It was a calm night on the Kent family farm. A streak of neon green broke across the sky and landed in the middle of the fields, purple tinged smoke wafting from the crash site. A boy of about six rolled over in his sleep, glowing green eyes glancing at the stars above framed by smoke. The gentle breeze is still blowing, returning the night to calm.

*****

Danny was gonna put Clockwork in soup time whenever he got back into the Zone. 

He was laying there, staring at the clouds in the sky, surrounded by corn, and only about three and a half feet tall, wondering where in the Realms he was. Clockwork had said something about sending him off somewhere with people who could handle a child with powers growing up before tossing him through a portal by the ankle. He had ended up in low orbit and was lulled to sleep by staring at the stars he is so fond of.

Crawling out of the hole he was in, he examined the surrounding area and just found a bunch of burnt and slightly smoldering corn and kicked up dirt. The gentle breeze brought the smell of bacon to his nose and he floated to look just above the tall plants around him. He spots a house in the distance and starts heading there, making sure to walk the last few yards just in case this isn’t where CW intended him to go. He finds himself stumbling from the field just to make eye contact with a man pulling on his work boots for the day on the porch steps, the man freezes. 

“Hey Martha?” The man yells into the house.

“Yes Jon?” a voice muffled from the door yells back.

“Do we have a spare room done up?” the man, Jon, asks, not taking his eyes off Danny.

“Why? Are you expecting someone and forgot to tell me?” the voice sounds like it’s getting closer to the door.

“No honey, I think we may have a repeat situation of Clark though.” He briefly glances from Danny up to the last bits of smoke wafting from the field. A quiet “What?” comes from the house. He gentles his voice, full attention on Danny. “Hey son, did you have a bit of an accidental landing in the corn? Is your head okay? Are your parents around?”

Danny stays still for a moment thinking about what’s going on. The man seems to at least suspect that he crash landed on his property and mentioned something about something like this happening before. Have these people dealt with a random child appearing at their house before? Specifically one that crashed from the sky? He has many questions, but he should probably answer Jon first. 

“Yeah, I got sent away until I was better, my head doesn’t hurt at all and my parents are not exactly from around here, and don’t know where I am.” He pauses thinking about it. “Does the children-crashing-onto-your-farm-thing happen a lot to you?”

Jon chuckled as he finished tying his boots up and walked down the stairs just as the door opens and a woman in an apron is standing there looking surprised to see an unknown child standing in her yard. The man crouches down in front of Danny, giving him a once-over. 

“You’d be surprised, now what’s your name son?.”

“It’s Danny Fenton, what’s yours?”

“Jon Kent, my wife over there is Martha. Now you look like you could use a good meal and a washup, how’s that sound?” Jon grins at Danny and musses up his hair before standing and offering a hand to walk into the house. He smiles over at Martha who blinks and then gives Danny a warm smile, standing aside to let them enter the house.

“Good thing I made some extra breakfast then, let’s get some food in you young man, you’re as skinny as a post!” She smiles and heads towards the kitchen. “Be sure to wash up your hands first hun, can’t eat with dirty hands! And Jon! What have I told you about your muck boots being in the house! I’m sure Danny can find his way and wash his own hands; second door on the right hun; and git outta my house with those things on, I’ll have more coffee ready for you once you feed the animals!” Jon pouted and trudged his way out of the house.

Danny smiled a little to himself as he looked for the door Martha was talking about, noting the wallpaper and decor that looked like every midwest farmer’s house he’d seen in any piece of media ever. After washing his hands he made his way to where he could hear soft humming and dishes being washed. He saw a plate of pancakes and bacon on the table next to a glass of orange juice, a glass of milk, and a container of syrup and headed to the spot.

“Thank you Mrs. Kent.” he said from his seat and she smiled back at him, going back to the dishes. Danny realized he’d probably have to start explaining what he could to them soon, but decided to focus on the breakfast in front of him. The breakfast that wasn’t alive and currently trying to kill him. He nearly cried.

“So Danny,” Martha began as she wiped her hands off with a dish rag. “Do you remember how it is you got here?” She joined him at the table with a cup of coffee after setting a mug, a spoon and the sugar bowl next to the machine for her husband when he came in.

“I do, it’s a really weird story though, I’m not sure you’ll believe me.” He was hesitant, he still wasn’t sure these were the people that Clockwork meant to send him to. Though they’ve taken the whole crash-landed-child-thing pretty well… Screw it, he’ll see if he can wait until Jon comes back and explain to both of them. “Can we wait for Mr. Kent too? I don’t really want to say it twice.” 

She smiled at him, taking a sip of her coffee and then nodded. “That’s fine hun, he shouldn’t be more than a couple minutes unless the rooster decided to pick a fight again.” she chuckled to herself, looking out of the window while drinking her coffee. She sees the faint trail of smoke rising in the sky outside and her eyebrows pinch in worry. “You didn’t happen to see anythin’ burning when you got up, did you?” 

Danny glances out the window and sees the smoke. “Oh no, there was just a little bit still smoldering in the hole, but there wasn’t anything actively burning. I can show you both when I finish explaining what I can.” The slapping of a screen door startles him and Jon walks in, heading straight for the coffee maker and making himself a cup, then joining them at the table.

“So Danny-boy, what can you tell us?” Jon gives his full attention to Danny. 

Danny shifts in his seat, looking every part the six year old he appeared to be, uncertain at the attention of two adults. “Well, it’s a long story and kinda out there? I’m not sure how much you’ll believe?” He looks uncertain at the pair across from him who share a look. Martha reaches across the table to take Danny’s hand.

“Honey, you wouldn’t believe the stuff we’re used to, I’m sure it’s fine.”

Danny only hesitated a moment longer and then sighed looking far older than his apparent six years. “So to start off with, wherever this is, I’m not from around here. I’m assuming since you both speak English that this is still Earth, but maybe not MY Earth, I’m still a bit confused on the whole ‘multiverse’ thing, but either way, I got sent here until some stuff got sorted out and so I’ll be here until it does.” He was rambling, he knew, but he’s kind of anxious about stuff. “I kinda got put in my childhood body and now I have to get back to my actual age and my Guardian said something about time here running differently than in my dimension before he just chucked me through a portal. He did say he was sending me to people who could handle my weirdness as I age, so I’m assuming you are them and maybe have some experience with kids with freaky weird stuff happening to them?”

The Kents once more shared a look, this one a little longer than the last, then turned back to Danny. “Oh son, I think you’ll fit in just fine. So, how long can we expect you for? I can tell you’re probably a lot older than six judging by how you talk?”

Danny blinked at him, trying to process the fact that they didn’t seem phased and rather seemed like they believed him. “Uh, I was sixteen, so I guess a decade? I’m sorry to impose on you for a while, really I can figure out stuff on my own, I don’t want to be a bother.”

Jon chuckled “Oh trust me son, it wouldn’t be an issue, I’m sure Clark would love a younger brother, or at the very least a friend who understands him. We have plenty of room here, and though we’d probably ask you for help with chores, we’d be glad to have you for however long you need.”

Danny blinks again at them. They weren’t serious, right? They just seem fine taking in a random child and having him live with them for however long. And who was this Clark? What did he mean by younger brother?

“Clark?” he asked hesitantly.

“Oh right, our son, you’ll meet him when he gets home from school, I’m sure you’ll get along just fine! Now Danny, let me show you to a room and we can get you settled, we’ll probably have to head on over to the thrift shop to get you something to wear besides these charred and muddy pj’s, but we should have something from Clark that’s too small that’ll fit you for now.” Martha took his hand and led him upstairs to where he’d be in apparently his new home.

*****

Clark had had a pretty boring day at school. The classes were boring. He had to hold back in gym class again and when studying the skeletal system in biology, he started studying the teacher’s bones instead of the display skeleton or the worksheet. He was really looking forward to getting home and maybe going for a fly around the fields where no one could see him or maybe catching the latest episode of Rescue Rangers. 

He could spot his house in the distance and after looking around to make sure no one would see him, he sped down the driveway as fast as he could, knocking up a lot of dirt in the process. He really liked going fast, whether running or flying. He just loved the wind in his hair. 

“Ma, Pa, I’m home.” he kicked his sneakers off and rushed upstairs into his room to drop off his bag. He listened around for heartbeats and realized that Pa was out on the tractor and Ma was out with the chickens. He froze as he heard a much closer sound though. It was very slow and faint, but he could hear another heartbeat in the house. Even more, he could hear someone muttering to themselves in the guest room and the flipping of pages.

Clark slowly made his way down the hall towards the sound and peaked in the room with his x-ray vision. There, sitting on the ceiling, was a child about half his age reading a ratty old book about space. Clark stood in the doorway, now able to see him in regular vision and just stared at him. He took a moment until he decided to just join him up there and sat across from him.

“So who are you?” Clark asked while the kid was still focused on his book. He didn’t even look up from the book.

“Name’s Danny.” The kid paused for a second before he looked up and stared at Clark. Danny looked from Clark to the ceiling, to the floor, and then back to Clark. “Oh, so that’s why they said I’d fit right in here. I guess we are pretty similar! I’m guessing you’re Clark then?” The child beamed at him, putting out his hand to shake. Clark took it gently, not wanting to hurt the kid. Then the kid gripped his hand tight and Clark realized that they have more in common than he thought and gripped his hand tighter in response.

“So where are you from?” Clark asked, very curious as to how this kid who could fly and had his strength, but also had almost no heartbeat ended up at his house. Danny rubbed the back of his neck.

“Well, I’m not from this Earth and I kinda got put here to recover for a long while and my Guardian decided your parents are the best equipped to handle a kid growing up with powers, so he sent me here. I’m guessing because of you?” 

“Yeah, mine started manifesting around your age. What powers do you have? How long do you plan to be here? Where are you from? You said this wasn’t your Earth, I’m guessing you’re from a different dimension then? That’s so cool!” Clark, ever curious, shot off many questions rapid fire and Danny laughed while answering them all as best he could.

Part 2

[honeybewrites]

OC Questionnaire Tag

Thank you @the-golden-comet for the tag, @wyked-ao3 for the tag @the-letterbox-archives for the tag and @ominous-feychild for the tag!! And they you guys for being patient! I know a couple of you tagged me in this a while ago, so sorry for the wait!!

Once again, long post!

Fres

How many people have you killed?

Far more than you would expect, or maybe not if you know me. I can’t actually give you a number. I lost track a long time ago and if we’re counting indirect killings, like building collapses and fires, that number goes up really quickly. Thankfully I don’t do much killing nowadays, and the ones I do kill, well, let’s just say they deserve it.

Favorite type of drink?

Coffee. Hands down. Throw in some flavors and creamer and I can drink five of those puppies in a day easily. It’s a small problem admittedly l…

Do you smoke?

No. I have before, when I was in the Mors and a certain undercover assignment required it, but I don’t do it if my own free will. I don’t like the smell or the taste of it in the slightest.

Asset 703

Life stranded on an island or life as a prisoner?

Island. Easily. I would be completely alone. No Mors, no war. Just me and the ocean. It would be… peaceful. I used to dream about that. Moving to an unknown island in the middle of nowhere… obviously I grew out of that. Just a childish fantasy.

Would you wear a dress?

I have, on many occasions. Certain missions require it. I don’t particularly mind. Though I hate having to wear all the glamours to hide my scars.

What is your most traumatic memory?

I… don’t think that’s relevant information. I can’t risk that information getting into the wrong hands. I was scarred from it. Physically I mean. I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone…

Rage Airvix

What's your relationship with your family like?

It’s alright. I haven’t seen them in quite a few years and we don’t agree on a lot of things. Me and my older sister Cadi were always close. I haven’t been able to see her in person for three years now, but we still talk a couple times a month. I miss her.

Do you have any hobbies? If so, what ones?

I like reading! I have quite the collection on my estate. Lots of rare editions, signed copies. It’s pretty valuable. I also dabble in alchemy and I like anything that has to do with being outside like hiking or gardening.

Do you dream often? What about?

It kind of goes in waves I guess? I’ll have a longer stretch of dreams and nightmares for a couple months, and then it kind of goes away. Most of the time it’s memories or complete utter nonsense. Half the time I don’t even remember them. Except the nightmares. I generally remember those.

Fres

What was the worst day of your life?

As weird as it sounds, the day I left the Mors. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy to be free but… I thought [redacted] was coming with me. In the end she chose the Mors and we went our separate ways. I wouldn’t hesitate to fight her now.

What's your worst nightmare?

The Mors capturing me. I know exactly what they would do and I wouldn’t be able to escape them a second time. It terrifies me to think about.

If a monster asked you your worst nightmare, what would you tell it and why?

Honestly, I’d probably lie. Who knows what its intentions are? But if I had to tell the truth, I wouldn’t even say anything; I would just show it all the damage the Mors have caused.

Leaving this one as an open tag!! Mostly because I’m on mobile and can’t easily see who I’ve tagged before lol

Your Questions:

Sun or moon?

Would you rather drown or be buried alive?

Pumpkin spice or apple cider?

[thestarlightforge]

Fiona’s Art Journal:

Table of Contents

Hello, everyone! Welcome to my blog!

As outlined here, my New Year’s Resolution for 2024 was to do something for my art every day. Whether writing, drawing, watching/studying, exploring or reading—I’d do something to sharpen my artistic focus daily.

As the year has gone by, I’ve documented some of the process on Tumblr. The tag “#Fiona’s Art Journal” has both reflections and artistic works, and “#Poetry” has an index of poems. This post is an index, and I’ll update it with hyperlinks to journals, art posts, and other favs.

NB: Aside from theatre and art posts, much of this blog is fandom posting about whatever (usually queer) media has most recently captured my interest. You can track various Strange New Worlds, Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, Supergirl and House of the Dragon rotations (to name a few), along with other shows/movies on my list. I will probably spend the rest of 2024 crying about Agatha All Along (as WandaVision is an all-time favorite media & I’ve waited 2 years, since the night before I graduated undergrad, for Jac Schaeffer to fix this mess). I appreciate your understanding during this time, lol.

Journals — 2024

PETITION and Info to shut down the Pinyon Plain Uranium Mine and protect the people and lands of the Navajo Nation, Havasupai, Hopi, and Ute Mountain Ute — 8/28/24

DC Metro Accessibility Petition

“Squishy But Firm: Sexcapades of a Crip Girl” at the Kennedy Center Local Theatre Festival 🏳️‍🌈♿️🏳️‍⚧️ — 8/24/24

2024 🏳️‍🌈 Media Retrospective ❤️ — 9/20/24

National Be Nice To Bugs Day! We love a native species! 🥰 — 7/14/24

Setting Intentions: “Through the Sunken Lands” — 1/31/24

Introduction — 12/31/23

Go Listen to Sandra Yellowhorse — 11/20/22

AO3 Entries

A Rhaenicent & Rhaesaria entry written shortly after HOTD 2x07

An early chapter of my ongoing Snowbaird fic with @imjustmarcy

Artistic Works — 2024

“Clerics Have Necromancy” — 8/28/24

“Winter Blooms” — 8/18/24

“For Gus and Claudia” — 6/22/24

“QUEERING NEVERLAND IS LIVE—MY PAPER MADE THE COVER!” — 6/6/24

“Gentle Animals” Short Story — 5/1/24

“From Your Internet Big Brother” Essay — 4/8/24

Isolation/Recovery Discussion — 4/4/24

“Playing Fetch” Short Story — 3/31/24

“Building Momentum” Prose Poetry — 3/24/24

“Following the River” Short Story — 3/22/24

“Is There A World” Poem — 3/15/24

“A Practical Career” Short Story — 3/10/24

“The arospecs are onto something” Prose Poetry — 3/9/24

“Through the Sunken Lands” Pins Setup Addition — 3/9/24

“I wrote you a play” Prose Poetry — 3/9/24

On the Models of Disability Discussion — 3/5/24

“Threads” Prose Poetry — 3/3/24

“Interdependence is a love poem” Prose Poetry — 2/24/24

“A Shift” Short Story — 2/20/24

“To Falling in Love” Prose Poetry — 2/6/24

“Push-up Contest” Short Story — 2/6/24

“Autistic Katniss saves the world” THG Meta/Discussion — 2/2/24

“Purpose” Essay — 2/1/24

“Oracle Forever” Short Story — 1/29/24

“Stardust” Poem — 1/23/24

“Point of View” Short Story — 1/21/24

Patriarchy Hurts Everyone Discussion (edit: erroneously flagged/removed by Tumblr staff, appeal not allowed) — 1/21/24

“A Winter Morning” Short Story — 1/16/24

“Ymir with the Freckles” Short Story — 1/11/24

On Propaganda & the Cancellation of Queer Media (OFMD) Discussion — 1/10/24

“Glimmer” Short Story — 1/5/24

“What the Antihero, Your Villain, Has Left” Essay — 12/31/23

Some Favorite Art, Analyses/Metas & Journals (2023 + Previous)

“Lost Girl” at the National Theatre in Higher Ed Conference Journal — Aug. 6, 2023

First Day of “Through the Sunken Lands” at the Kennedy Center Journal — Dec. 11, 2023

Intimacy Choreography in “Hacks” Analysis — Jul. 15, 2023

“Swallowtail” Poem — Sept. 18, 2023

“Hope is the only thing stronger than fear” TBOSAS Meta — Nov. 19, 2023

“Wake Up” Gay Poem — Aug. 23, 2023

“Myths” Poem— Nov. 12, 2023

“Thanks, Tennessee” Gay Poem — Nov. 23, 2022

On Strength: Katniss and Lucy Gray TBOSAS Meta/Journal — Dec. 10, 2023

“Trust is more important even than love” TBOSAS Meta — Nov. 24, 2023

“The Valley Song” THG Meta — Nov. 18, 2023

Their first meeting in Twelve TBOSAS Meta — Dec. 24, 2023

Hurt/Comfort Thoughts TBOSAS Meta/Journal — Dec. 17, 2023

Do Better with Queer Rep — Aug. 19, 2023

“Ellee” Short Story — Aug. 15, 2023

I crack myself up

“Oh, ableism. Great. THAT’S not gonna go over well with the woke mob.” — Aug. 19, 2024

rhaenicent nation how we feelin 😌 — July 21, 2024

it gets better, apparently :)) — July 2-, 2024

representation matters (GoT/HotD) — July 21, 2024

rhaenyra my love, never ever change 😂 — July 21, 2024

SO MADGE X KATNISS LOL — June 9, 2024

Writing while queer — Jan. 2, 2024

Snowbaird “Aca-scuse me?” — Nov. 20, 2023

It’s almost like Suzanne meant to do that — Nov. 7, 2023

Not Coryo being more normal than Gale or Peeta — Dec. 13, 2023

Peeta “my beautiful princess with a disorder” 😆 — Dec. 7, 2023

SnowJanusBaird ≠ Everlark/Everthorne, lmao — Dec. 31, 2023

ValCarol giggles — Nov. 11, 2023

[madsworld15]

New #Britin fic in my Diabetes Universe: I know you’ll be a beautiful surprise (Reposted with Edits)

So, recently I added a fic to my Britin Diabetes universe on AO3 in which a middle-aged Brian and Justin discuss the idea of having kids together. I thought that was the end of it for me and my creative brain. But, then a few days ago an idea entered my head and I was compelled to write it up. 9.2k words later I'm convinced this might be a cool idea to expand into a full multi-chapter fic idea for the universe. As of right now I only plan to post it here.

The premise is this: It's March 2018. Gus is a freshman in college and still living at home with Brian and Justin. It's been almost a year since they discussed the idea of kids. Then, Justin starts feeling sick and Daphne jokingly asks him if he could be pregnant. Which leads Justin to take a test. That is where we find ourselves at the start of this.

BE WARNED THIS FIC IDEA IS MPREG. (Don't worry about the explanation of how it's possible just believe it lol)

This isn’t a trope I write for so any feedback would be great!

Chapter 1.

Justin stared at the test in his hand. On the display screen were two distinct lines.

Fuck.

Justin rubbed his hand across his mouth. He had taken the test after Daphne had joked that he could be pregnant. They’d been hanging out the day before on their mutual lunch break when Justin had suddenly vomited. He figured he was just catching something from one of his students. Daphne, the doctor that she is, asked him if he was pregnant with laughter in her eyes.

Sure, male pregnancy was a thing, but he and Brian always used condoms. He guessed a condom must’ve broken in the last few months. But, he didn’t recall Brian mentioning it. He had no idea what they were going to do. It wasn’t as if they had wanted this. In fact, just last year they’d had the conversation about kids and decided it wasn’t something in the cards.

Gus was a freshman in college, Brian had been struggling to keep his blood sugars steady for months now resulting in a few ER visits, and Justin had just switched from teaching high school art to elementary school art. In short, it was not a good time for an upheaval such as this.

Fuck.

Justin slipped the test into a wad of tissues and walked it from the bathroom to their bedroom. He opened the drawer of the end table on his side of the bed. Justin glanced at the test once again before shoving it inside and shutting the drawer. One glance at the clock told him it was almost 6 pm. He needed to get dinner started.

Justin was standing in their kitchen, his thoughts on the test hidden in their bedroom, while he chopped up veggies for a salad. The lasagna he’d pre-made over the weekend was in the oven heating. His phone rang pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Hey, Gus. What’s up?” Justin wiped his hands as he cradled the cellphone between his ear and his shoulder.

“Hey, I am going out with some friends tonight and then I plan on crashing at Isaac’s dorm.” The teen practically yelled, loud noise in his background making it hard to hear.

“Alright, I’ll let your dad know you won’t be home. Have fun. Be safe.” Justin hung up.

He stared at his phone again, contemplating his next move. He should probably get an official test done before telling Brian, just to be sure. With that he dialed his best friend.

“Hey, Daph.” Justin bit his lip.

“Wow. Twice in as many days. What’s wrong?” Daph laughed.

“I took a test.” Justin muttered, pausing to gain the courage for what came next, “I’m pregnant.”

“Holy Shit! Are you sure? Have you told Brian?” Daphne asked her questions calmly despite her obvious surprise.

“Not yet. I was wondering if I came by the ER tomorrow during your shift if you’d run a blood test so I can be sure. I don’t wanna freak him out too if it’s not real.” Justin ran a hand through his blond hair.

“Of course. I could also get the lab to rush it so you’d know by the end of the day if you come in before you go to work.” Daphne reassured him.

“What if it’s also positive?” Justin was back to being worried.

“Then you and Brian will have a decision to make. Justin, you're only 35. It's not as though it’s physically dangerous. And you and Brian are financially stable. It will all work out.” Daphne answered him. She always knew how to keep Justin from spiraling.

He heard the key turning in their lock. Brian was home. Justin needed to pull himself together so Brian wouldn’t suspect anything.

“Thanks, Daph. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Justin replied and hung up just as Brian’s arms wrapped around Justin’s shoulders from behind.

“Hello, honey.” Brian teased as he nipped at Justin’s ear before kissing his neck.

“How was your day?” The older man added, pulling away from physical touch.

“Fine. The kids wore me out though. I’m exhausted.” Justin rubbed his face as if to prove a point. Then he pulled the lasagna out of the oven.

Just then, the smell of bubbling cheese hit his nose and he felt nauseous. He tried to hide it by breathing through his mouth and drinking some water, but Brian was watching him closely.

“Still feeling under the weather? I told you to stay home today and sleep it off.” Brian braced his arms around Justin, locking him in against the counter next to the oven.

“I’m fine, Bri. Nothing a good night of sleep won’t solve.” Justin smiled despite the rolling feeling in his gut, and kissed his partner on his cheek.

“Well why don’t you rest. You don’t need to stay up on my account.” Brian reached up and cupped the back of Justin’s head.

Justin decided to take Brian’s gentle out and headed to bed. He nodded against Brian’s cheek as they embraced.

“I’ll drink some ginger ale and sleep.” Justin could feel his bone deep exhaustion more acutely now that Brian gave him the permission to.

Then, just as he reached their bedroom door he remembered Gus’ call.

“Oh and Gus called. He said he’s crashing at Isaac’s dorm tonight.” Justin yelled over his shoulder. Brian didn’t respond, but he knew the man had heard.

Hours later Justin realized he must’ve fallen asleep when Brian getting into bed brought him back to consciousness. The brunet apologized, placing a hand on Justin’s back as the blond drifted back to sleep.

—————

“Alright, I will get this over to the lab and call you when I have the results.” Daphne pulled off her gloves and put the vial of blood into a canister to take it to the lab once she’s done talking to Justin.

“Do results usually take a long time?” Justin was so nervous to know the answer. “I don’t end up in the hospital very often so I’m not sure how all this works.”

“After years of dealing with Brian’s diabetes I would’ve thought blood work would be old hat for you.” Daphne smiled and rubbed Justin’s shoulders, “Usually blood work takes a few hours when sent from the ER, but since you didn’t officially register as a patient it will be run at the typical speed.”

Justin nodded, staring at his hands. Daphne stepped closer and placed her hand on his shoulder.

“Justin, are you okay?”

Justin looked up and took a deep breath. “I just worry this will ruin things with Brian or he’ll be angry.”

“When was the last time Brian got angry instead of talking things out?” Daphne gave the blond a knowing look. “Sure, when we were young and you guys were first starting out he wasn’t likely to communicate, but he changed all that years ago.”

“I know.” Justin bit his bottom lip and shrugged, “But we also had a discussion about a kid of our own when Gus was about to graduate high school. So, not even a year ago.”

“And? How did that conversation go?” Daphne sat down in the chair next to Justin.

“We agreed we didn’t need a child. We had Gus and Isaac.” Justin shrugged. At this point he was nearly in tears and trying to hide it.

“Doesn’t sound to me like he’s fully opposed.” Daphne shrugged and pulled Justin to his feet as she stood up.

“He’s not officially for it either. You remember how he was when Gus was a baby. Brian doesn’t do well with small children.” Justin grabbed his coat and put it back on, “Anyway, I gotta get to work. Thanks, Daph.”

“Jus, this isn’t the end of the world.” Daphne tried to reassure him.

“So you say.” Justin mumbled on his way out.

For the rest of the day, Justin volleyed between being stressed about the results of the blood test and worrying that the relationship he’d spent half his life in was coming to an end. He was in his final plan period of the day when Daphne called him.

“Hey, please tell me I’m worried for nothing and that I’m not pregnant.” Justin answered the phone without any preamble.

“Let’s talk about this in person. I’m almost at your school. Meet me outside and I will buy us some coffee and we can talk.” Daphne responded. “See you in about 5.”

Justin walked out of the school after informing the principal he was leaving a bit early. Daphne was waiting for him on the sidewalk. She was wearing a purple peacoat and matching hat, scarf, and gloves. Justin rubbed his hands together regretting that he’d accidentally left his gloves in his classroom in his rush to leave. Daphne immediately wrapped him up in a hug.

“Here.” She handed him a computer printout of his test results.

Justin’s eyes scanned the page until he found the word, “Positive” toward the bottom.

“Shit.” Justin crumpled the page up in his fist as he stared, stricken at Daphne. “What am I going to do?”

“First, you are going to walk with me to the bodega we both love, grab a coffee and a pastry. Then, we are going to talk about this until you feel comfortable to face Brian.” Daphne wrapped her arm around Justin’s and led him up the block.

“What would I do without you?” Justin breathed a sigh of relief. Caffeine and carb loading sounded like the perfect antidote to his current anxiety.

“You would’ve had multiple mental breakdowns at this point.” Daphne giggled then laid her head down on Justin’s shoulder.

Half an hour later, Justin and Daphne had their hands full with pastries and coffee. Daphne was unlocking the door to her apartment and leading her best friend inside. After ordering, they had both decided it was much too cold for them to eat in the park. So, Daphne told him they could go to her apartment. Her husband and two kids weren’t home so it would be just them.

Once they were settled on the couch, Daphne spoke first. “Just think. If you go through with this Leo will get to grow up with a best friend.”

“Daph.” Justin gave her a warning look.

“Right, I promised I wouldn’t try to sway your decision.” Daphne put up her hands in defense. “I still think this isn’t the end of the world. How many times over the years have you mentioned kids to me?”

“Alright, so I’ve always loved kids. It’s part of the reason I took up teaching. But, Daph, Brian and I have a life we love and a baby doesn’t fit into that.” Justin looked panicked, he was sure of it considering how panicked he felt.

“Maybe, but you guys have Gus.” Daphne tried to point out, always the voice of reason.

“Taking care of a teenager is not the same thing as a baby and you know it. We didn’t have to adjust much when Gus moved in because he was already independently taking care of himself. He just needed guidance.” Justin leaned back against the couch cushions and closed his eyes. His stomach was aching like it wanted to turn itself inside out.

“You’re right. 14 is different from a newborn. However, do you think Derek and I were ready for a baby when we got pregnant with Ella? We’d been married for 5 years at that point. We had an established routine and we had to adjust. You and Brian will too.”

“Brian’s been struggling with his health for the past 6 months. We haven’t really told anyone because he doesn’t want people hovering, but I’m not sure now is the time to be making major adjustments.” Justin sighed. If he was being completely honest with himself this fact was holding him back the most from accepting this pregnancy as a good thing.

“Has it been serious?” Daphne leaned over and grabbed Justin’s hand to hold it.

“We’ve ended up in the ER a few times for both low and high blood glucose levels. What has been working for him for years is no longer a safe option.” Justin used his other hand to pick at the stitching of the couch cushion. “He’s been struggling with more migraines and Diabetic neuropathy.”

Daphne was quiet for a moment and so Justin took a deep breath to calm himself. There was just too much happening to him all at once and he wasn’t handling it well. Normally he’d be all for talking it through with Brian, but this time he hesitated because bringing it into the open with his partner made all of it more real.

“All the more reason for you to discuss it with him. Brian’s always been able to dictate what he can and can’t handle. Don’t take this decision away from him because you’re afraid.” Daphne gave Justin a knowing look.

“I’ll consider it.” Justin curled on himself, bringing his knees up to his chest. It wasn’t as easy a position as it had been when he was younger, but he was still nimble enough to do it for a short period.

“Wanna watch some cartoons?” Daphne gently shoved his shoulder. Justin nodded.

The two friends settled into comfortable silence while watching reruns of the cartoons they lived to consume when they were kids. Before he knew it, Justin had dozed off on Daphne’s shoulder only to be shaken awake by his best friend when her husband and kids made it home.

“Uncle Justin!” Ella screamed as she ran across the room and launched her little body into his arms.

“Oof. You have grown a whole foot since the last time I saw you!” Justin laughed, squeezing his goddaughter close to his chest.

“What do you mean? I only have 2 feet. Same as always.” The five-year-old looked down at her legs just to be sure.

Justin laughed, “I meant you’ve gotten taller, little munchkin.” Then he tickled the little girl as Daphne grabbed her one-year-old from her husband’s arms.

“You staying for dinner, Justin?” Derek asked as he pulled a rotisserie chicken out of a grocery bag along with the makings of a salad and a to-go container of macaroni and cheese from the deli down the block.

Justin put Ella back down and reached for his coat. “No, I should go home. Brian’s probably wondering where I am.”

“Tell him.” Daphne squeezed his arm as he passed by her. “Please.”

Justin leaned over and placed a kiss on her cheek. “I will.”

But, instead of going straight home, Justin paid a cab to drive him around Queens for a bit before heading over to their brownstone. He still wasn’t sure what he wanted to do about the wadded up test result in his coat pocket. An hour passed between him leaving Daphne’s and arriving back at the home he shared with Brian. He knew for a fact Brian would be wondering where he was, if not already calling local friends to find him.

Just as he was coming to the front door, Gus approached from down the street. Fuck. Justin hadn’t factored in Gus being home. The teen had a backpack slung over one shoulder and a red tint to his cheeks as the wind blew his brunet hair around his face.

“Hey, Jus. Just getting home? Isn’t it a bit late for you?” The teen smirked, morphing his face into an exact replica of a younger Brian.

“Not that it's any of your business but I spent some time with Daphne and her family this afternoon.” Justin unlocked the door and held it open for his stepson.

“Hey, Dad! Justin and I are home.” Gus hollered the moment they were both in the foyer.

Brian came from the direction of the kitchen, his face morphing from concern to relief. He immediately wrapped Justin up in a hug, ignoring Gus. He kissed the side of Justin’s head and breathed him in.

“I was so worried something happened to you. When I got home and you weren’t here I called Daphne to see if you were with her. She then told me that you had just left. So, I assumed you’d be home ages ago.”

From over Brian’s shoulder Justin saw Gus roll his eyes. Then the teen trudged toward his bedroom and closed the door with a loud thump.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you. I needed some time to think so I had a cab drive me around Queens before dropping me off here.” Justin pulled out of Brian’s arms and shrugged off his coat. He made sure to grab the crumpled up paper from his pocket.

Staring down at it, Justin let out his breath and forced himself to take another deep one to replace the air in his lungs.

“Good to know my money is being put to good use.” Brian teased, but there was still a hint of concern lacing every word. “So, what did you need to think about?”

Justin closed his eyes, took another deep breath, unfolded the paper and handed it to Brian. “This.”

Then he walked toward the kitchen, not waiting around for Brian’s reaction. He was terrified of what that one little word was going to do to the world they had built together. From an honest standpoint, Justin would never be upset about having a child, but he knew Brian was much more complicated. Justin had just poured himself a glass of orange juice when Brian joined him in the kitchen. His face was completely unreadable, not calming Justin’s nerves in the slightest.

“Is this why you’ve been distant this week?” Brian reached out to place his hand on Justin’s arm, getting the blond to look him in the eye.

“At first it was because I really did think I was sick. But then…” Justin stopped trying to catch his breath as tears spilled from his eyes. “Brian, I’m sorry.”

A moment later, his partner’s arms were wrapped around Justin, pushing him against Brian’s chest. Brian’s hand went up to cup the back of Justin’s head. He kissed him on his temple.

“Justin.” Brian whispered, pulling back a bit, “Justin, please look at me.”

Justin wiped his eyes, “I know this isn’t exactly something we are prepared for. It’s not like we wanted this to happen. I mean our lives are not equipped for a baby. I’m 35. You’re 47. We can’t do this.” Justin started to hyperventilate.

Brian rubbed his shoulders as Justin tried to gain control on his breathing again. “You done?”

Justin nodded.

“This is unexpected and that can be unnerving. And you’re right, our lives are not currently equipped for a baby. But, we can adjust. If that’s what you want.” Brian continued to rub Justin’s shoulders as he fell silent once more.

“What about you? I’m not the only one in this situation, Brian. You’ve never wanted kids.” Justin sniffed, a few more tears falling down his cheeks.

“Do you remember what I said when we talked about this a few months ago?” Brian moved a hand to Justin’s cheek and cupped it. “I said if that was something you wanted we would make it work. I don’t ever do or say anything I don’t mean.”

“Do we really want to even consider this? It’s a huge change?” Justin bit his lip. He looked into Brian’s eyes and only found gentleness there.

“Ignoring everything going on in our lives right now, what is your gut reaction to this news?” Brian dropped all physical contact with Justin and stepped back. It was as if he was giving Justin the space to independently assess his feelings.

Given the time and space to search his heart for his real feelings about it, Justin found the answer right away. His hands gravitated to his abdomen and he imagined eventually feeling the baby move inside him. He smiled despite himself.

He stepped up to Brian, who was now leaning against the counter. Placing his hands on either side of Brian, boxing him in he stared up into the older man’s eyes.

“I love you. I have loved you since I was 17. The idea of having a child that is a part of both of us is beautiful.” Justin leaned forward and kissed Brian, who closed his eyes and moved his lips against Justin’s.

“Does this make us heterosexuals?” Brian finally spoke, his joke indicating he wanted this as much as Justin did.

Justin backed away completely and laughed out loud. The stress of the last few days disappeared entirely. He was going to have a baby. Holy shit.

“What are we going to tell Gus? The family?” Justin finally responded.

“That is up to you.” Brian shrugged. “Let’s eat some dinner and worry about the rest later.”

Justin smiled and nodded his head. Brian rarely cooked, stating he didn’t prefer it. So, naturally, Justin was shocked to find that while he had delayed coming home, Brian had taken the time to cook up a chicken and potato dish. Justin was grateful his stomach decided to stay calm for this. Now that he knew for sure he was pregnant, Justin wasn’t looking forward to dealing with nausea for the next few months.

“You know my mom is going to flip out. She’s always wanted us to have a kid together.” Justin commented as he and Brian dug into their meal.

Brian smirked. “Well, she can save it for when it’s just the two of you.”

“You love when she showers you with mom love, don’t deny it.” Justin chuckled at him. Then, remembering that they had a teen in the house he hollered, “Gus? Are you joining us for dinner?”

After a few minutes of silence, Gus opened his door and stuck his head out. “Nah. I grabbed pizza with Isaac while we were studying for tomorrow’s chemistry exam.” Then without another word he closed his door once more.

“I swear your son never eats dinner with us anymore.” Justin pointed his fork at Brian accusingly.

“I love how he’s my son when it’s about something he’s not doing.” Brian chuckled and then with a cheeky grin added, “I’m going to do the same when this kid gets a little older, see how it makes you feel.”

A few hours later, Justin was sitting up in bed, scrolling through various websites on his phone. He was nervous about what pregnancy meant for his body. Now that he knew Brian was okay with the turn of events, Justin had found his anxiety switching to the physicality of being pregnant. Brian came into their bedroom from the bathroom, having just finished his nighttime routine.

“So, I’ve been thinking.” Justin started, placing his phone screen down on his chest, giving Brian his full attention.

Brian pulled back the blankets on his side of the bed and climbed in next to Justin before replying. “I’d say that’s a dangerous sign, but really you thinking is never a bad thing.”

“I’m trying to pinpoint when this could’ve happened. We always wear condoms and you tell me if one breaks because we get tested for HIV right after.” Justin assessed Brian trying to read his face.

The older man pinched his eyelids and sighed, “I was thinking about this while I was in the bathroom. The only thing I can think about was when we got trashed on New Year’s Eve at Daphne’s party. You and I don’t drink that much anymore and we kind of went overboard, who’s to say we didn’t make mistakes that night.”

“We also smoked a joint together when we got home that night.” Justin reminded Brian. “Yeah, I’m thinking this was a New Year’s misstep.”

“Which means you are probably almost two months. Shit.” Brian rubbed his temple again, signaling he was suffering from a headache.

“I will talk to Daphne tomorrow about finding a proper doctor to find out for sure.” Justin put his phone on the charger and turned off his lamp, cloaking them both in darkness. The two men end up in each other’s arms.

“I love you. We will get through this.” Brian muttered against Justin’s head before giving him a kiss.

—----

The morning of their first appointment with Dr. Savarese dawned bright and warm despite the layers of snow still on the ground from last week’s snow storm. It had been a few days since Justin officially confirmed that he was indeed pregnant at 35. Their appointment was at 4 pm, in the hopes that Brian would be able to pull away from work more swiftly than if it were in the morning or middle of the day.

Justin was nervous that there would be something wrong or worse all this had been a lie and they’d find out he wasn’t pregnant at all. Since telling Brian, he’d allowed himself to think about their future as dads to a new baby. It had been both nerve wracking and exciting, mostly exciting if Justin was being honest with himself.

“Morning, Sunshine.” Brian muttered, rolling over to place a kiss on Justin’s cheek before he got up and headed to the bathroom.

Justin smiled to himself and placed his hands on his abdomen. Today was the day they would see their baby. He heard Brian turn on the shower and knew he needed to get up soon. They usually showered together to save time on getting ready in the morning. But, also because it allowed their world to be a small bubble of just them for a little bit longer. Once they were showered, the responsibilities of parenting Gus and getting to work came crashing in and making their world a little bit louder.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Justin asked Brian nervously as he washed the older man’s chest.

“Justin. While kids were never my top priority in life, I don’t hate them. Besides, the idea of a little you running around sounds kind of nice. I always regretted not being around more for Gus when he was developing into the kid he was by the time I stepped up.” Brian smiled at Justin and nonverbally prompted him until Justin smiled back.

“You’re a great dad to Gus. Don’t ever question that. You’ll be an even better dad to this one.” Justin searched Brian’s face for a reaction.

“Okay, I’ll bite. Why?” Brian’s eyes were alight with mischief.

“Because when Gus was born you were bound and determined to never let another heart touch yours. You had these steel paneled walls up around you that kept even your closest friends at a distance. But, now, you are open and loving and communicative. You’re already more involved in this surprise baby than I ever saw you in the first two years of Gus being in this world. Just ask Lindsay and I bet she’d say the same.” Justin replied, playing with Brian’s ear.

Moments later, they were both dressed and ready for work enjoying some eggs and toast while standing in the kitchen. Pretty soon, Gus joined them, talking on his phone.

“Don’t worry mom. I’m getting enough sleep, enough food, and I’m focusing on my classwork.” Gus sighed and rolled his eyes at Justin who smirked.

Then, suddenly, Gus’ phone was extended between Brian and Justin.

“Mom wants to talk to you.” Gus directed at Brian. “She’s convinced you’re letting me live a life of debauchery.”

Justin choked on the juice he just swallowed and had to turn around to the sink as he laughed and coughed in equal measure.

“My goodness, Wendy. Are you trying to take away everything I hold dear in my life?” Brian took the phone from Gus and spoke into it after placing it on speaker.

“What?” Lindsay’s voice sounded utterly confused.

“Dad’s only saying that because Justin choked on his drink when I said you think I’m living a life similar to the one he was living when I was born.” Gus laughed and reached over to pat Justin on the shoulder now that he’d returned to his spot next to Brian.

“I did not say that! Gus, I swear to God.” Lindsay huffed. “Justin, are you okay? I’m sorry my kid is a carbon copy of his father.”

“He’s fine, Wendy.” Brian said as Justin turned back to the sink once more to vomit around another cough. “Now, what do you need to speak with me about? I need to get to work and the lad needs to get to school.”

“I just wanted to be reassured that Gus is in fact going to school and doing his best. I worry about him.” Lindsay’s voice was laced with a level of concern that only a long distance parent could have.

“Linds, don’t worry. Even if we wanted to, Gus could never be convinced to skip school. He’s as big a geek as Bri and I were in school.” Justin returned and reassured Lindsay.

“Okay, if you are sure.”

“We are.” Brian cut in, somewhat exasperated. “I swear it’s as if you don’t trust me to monitor my own kid.”

“I do. I just worry. Like always.” Lindsay muttered. Even though they couldn’t see her, Justin knew from experience Lindsay would have a pinched look on her face as she tried to work through her mom guilt.

“Oh, Linds. Speaking of Brian’s parenting.” Justin added, as Brian tried to physically shut him up. But, Justin persisted and wrestled the phone into his hands. “Do you think Brian would be a better parent today if we were to adopt a baby tomorrow?”

“Are you guys thinking about adopting?!” Lindsay screeched.

“No! We were just having a hypothetical conversation this morning and Brian doesn’t think he’d be much different as a dad than he was 18 years ago. So, I told him he should ask you because you aren’t biased by being with him and you’d know.” Justin was quick to shut down any rumors Lindsay might want to spread. They didn’t want people to know yet.

“Shit!” Lindsay exclaimed through the speaker. “Sorry, I gotta go. J.R. just threw up everywhere.”

“Why are you two being weird?” Gus asked his dads after he took his phone back and watched them silently for a moment.

“What? We aren’t being weird.” Justin squeaked. Brian just shook his head and smirked.

“That’ll convince the CIA.”

“What is really going on? Are you guys adopting? It’s definitely strange you bring up kids now after all these years.” Gus shrugged with a knowing look on his face. “Don’t tell me. I’m sure I’ll figure it out on my own soon enough.”

“Have a great day, Sonny Boy.” Brian replied, subtly rushing Gus out the door. “You will probably beat us home tonight. So, just get whatever you want for dinner.”

Once Gus was gone, Justin turned around and gagged into the sink once more. This time nothing came up. Brian rubbed his back, roaming his hand up and down.

“Sorry. The juice must not have agreed with me. Shit that acid coming back up really sucks.” Justin stood up and wiped at his mouth. “We should tell Gus sooner rather than later. He’s right, he’ll figure it out on his own.”

Brian held the back of Justin’s head, running his fingers through the blond hairs.

“Yeah we should. I’ll see you at the appointment. Have a good day.” Then Brian kissed Justin on the lips and was gone, off to work.

—---

Of course, Justin arrived at the appointment only to receive a text from Brian informing him that he’d be a bit late and to not wait on him. Justin was already back to being nervous about everything so finding out his partner wasn’t going to be there on time wasn’t helping him. Justin’s name was called a few minutes after he handed the receptionist back his medical history questionnaire.

“Justin Taylor?” A young woman wearing scrubs with flowers all over it called from across the waiting area. She had a short bob haircut that framed her face and made her look like a pixie.

“Yeah.” Justin stood up and walked toward her. “My partner is running late, could you let him in when he gets here?”

The nurse nodded and leaned over to mention it to the receptionist. Afterward she led Justin beyond the doors toward the doctor exam rooms in the back. They stopped at a scale where Justin’s weight was recorded. He was shocked to find he’d gained 5 lbs since the last time he’d had his weight recorded six months ago. Justin didn’t really ever fluctuate on his weight so even a small amount such as that further proved he was pregnant.

Once they made it to the exam room, Justin sat down on the table as the nurse pulled out the blood pressure cuff. He was used to all after years of follow up neurological appointments thanks to his persisting TBI. Speaking of which, as she tightened the cuff on his arm it triggered the spasm in his hand and Justin grunted from the sharp pain of it. Just as she was loosening things and recording his BP, Brian came rushing in.

The moment he sat in a chair next to the table he clocked Justin’s spasm and reached for his hand to massage it. Justin crossed his arm across his chest to give Brian better access. The nurse finally noticed his hand and looked terrified.

“Oh my goodness. Did I do that?” She pointed at Justin’s hand, her eyes overly apologetic.

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I usually stop you guys at the head and instruct you to check things on my left arm instead. I have a TBI that permanently affects the function of my right arm.” Justin gave her his prize winning smile and she relaxed.

“I should’ve asked if you had a preference. I apologize.”

“Seriously, no sweat. This happens at least once a day without a blood pressure cuff.” Justin shrugged and chuckled.

“Everything else seems to be in order. Dr. Savarese will be in to talk with you shortly.” She then exited the room, closing the door, and leaving Brian and Justin alone.

“Sorry for being late.” Brian muttered as he continued to massage Justin’s hand.

“It helps that they were delayed pulling me back here too. I hadn’t been in here with Nurse Ratchett more than ten minutes before you came in.” Justin smirked at his joke.

“Unfortunately, I was late because there is a small Kinnetik fire that I will have to travel to Pittsburgh tomorrow and put out.” Brian sighed. Justin’s fingers flattened out and so the older man dropped the contact.

Justin didn’t mind, it was uncomfortable to keep his arm crossed over his chest for an extended period of time anyway. He fell silent. Brian went back to Pittsburgh all the time for work, but this time his chest hurt at the thought of Brian being gone for a few days. He couldn’t understand why he was reacting similarly to how he had when Brian left him alone right after his bashing.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Brian gently nudged his shoulder, but Justin gave him a small smile and shook his head as the door opened to reveal Dr. Savarese.

“Hello, Justin. I’m Dr. Savarese. I see here you believe you’re pregnant.” Dr. Savarese read from his file before looking up and giving him a smile.

They shook hands and then Dr. Savarese took a seat at the desk.

“My best friend is an ER doctor. She took my blood for some blood work a few days ago and it came back positive for pregnancy.” Justin brought his hands together in his lap and fiddled with his fingers.

“Have you been experiencing any symptoms?” Dr. Savarese looked at Justin. The man was older than even Brian and on the petite side. His eyes were dark brown but filled with warmth.

“I have vomited a few times a day. A few more than that if I find a smell my body can’t handle.” Justin shrugged as Brian smirked.

“Like the orange juice this morning.” Brian commented.

Justin shuddered at the memory of the acidic beverage coming back up. “Plus, I’ve been extremely exhausted.”

Brian didn’t flinch hearing that. Justin had been hiding it extremely well, but he knew that Brian had probably still noticed he wasn’t as energetic as usual.

“Have you noticed a change in your emotional reaction to things?” Dr. Savarese took some notes on his tablet.

“Not particularly.” Justin muttered, turning to look at Brian. The older man shrugged.

“I haven’t noticed anything major.”

“Before we do an ultrasound to attempt to see what’s going on I’d like to go over your medical history.” At the doctor’s words, Justin reached for Brian’s hand.

“You want his book of allergies now or later?” Brian attempted to joke.

“Brian, please take this seriously.” Justin sighed, his anxiety was ramped up and he couldn’t pinpoint why. “They have all that in my patient file because of the forms I had to fill out as a new patient.”

“Yes, it seems you are allergic to quite a few medications, Mr. Taylor. It also says here that you are on an anticonvulsant?”

“Umm. Yeah, I was injured when I was 18 by a bat to my head. I still get minor seizures to my hand. I take the medication to prevent more significant problems.” Justin bit his lip.

“Have you ever had a major seizure?” Dr. Savarese’s face turned pinched and concerned. “I ask because if you are pregnant anticonvulsants can cause problems with the baby. We’ll want to assess the risk of taking you off them for the duration.”

“He had a significant seizure right after his injury occurred and then once more a few years later when he had an extremely high fever due to the flu. That was when he started the medication just to be safe.” Brian supplied as Justin struggled to find his voice.

Just then, Justin’s hand spasmed up again. This time the pain was so sharp Justin had to cradle his hand against his chest. Brian stood up and moved in place against Justin so he could lean on him while Brian massaged his hand again.

“Does that happen often?” Dr. Savarese pointed to Justin’s hand.

“Only when he’s using his hand too much or gets stressed. This is the second one in the past half-hour because the nurse wasn’t aware and checked his blood pressure on this arm.” Brian supplied and Justin breathed through the pain.

“Alright, I would like to confer with your neurologist after we are finished here today.” Dr. Savarese gave Justin a half-smile and turned back to his tablet, scrolling through Justin’s patient file.

“Aside from the TBI and your allergies, are there any other chronic conditions we should be aware of? Heart condition? Diabetes?” Dr. Savarese looked up again and waited for Justin to have the focus to answer.

“No, but Brian is a Type 1 Diabetic and Cancer Survivor.” Justin finally muttered. “Here’s hoping you don’t pass on those genetics.”

“Kid’s got jokes.” Brian commented, his hand squeezing Justin’s shoulder in comfort.

“It is important to note things in your medical history as well, Brian. After all, this child is a mix of both of you.” Dr. Savarese smiled at the couple. “Alright. Now, Justin, I need you to lie back and lift up your shirt.”

Justin did as Dr. Savarese asked. He looked over at Brian who moved with Justin so as to stand near Justin’s shoulder. The two watched each other in silence, the reality of the situation fully sinking in as a monitor was brought over. They were going to see if the blood work was accurate.

“Do we have an idea of when this might have happened?” The doctor asked as he grabbed a squeeze bottle of gel and warmed it up in his hands.

“We always use condoms, but on New Year’s Eve we were extremely inebriated so we don’t remember the state of things as it were.” Brian responded before Justin could even process the question.

“So, we’re thinking it’s around 10 weeks.” Dr. Savarese nodded and squeezed the gel onto Justin’s abdomen. Justin hissed as the cool substance hit his skin.

“Sorry, it’ll warm up shortly.” The doctor apologized, “If the calculations are correct we should be able to see the fetus just fine.”

Justin and Brian smirked at one another as the doctor mentioned the gel warming up. They were well aware how quickly gels could warm up. Then, Dr. Savarese was telling them their child was up on the screen and Justin’s breath caught in his throat.

There on the screen was a tiny little blob that had a clearly defined head and stubby limbs. He squeezed Brian’s hand even tighter.

“Bri…” Justin muttered in a breathless voice. “That’s our baby.”

“Holy shit.” Brian muttered.

“Would you like to hear the heartbeat?” Dr. Savarese’s voice floated through their amazement at the image of their baby on the screen.

Justin tore his eyes away and stared at the doctor. “Can we really? Already?”

The doctor nodded, “You are measuring at 10 weeks exactly.”

Then he pressed a button and the room was filled with the sound of their baby’s heartbeat. Justin couldn’t believe the extremely rapid whooshing sounds were his child. The child that he was carrying inside him. He turned to look at Brian and saw the man had tears in the corners of his eyes. Justin smiled up at him and squeezed their hands again. Brian smiled at him and wiped at his tears.

“Guess this is really happening then.” Brian finally muttered. “Part of me thought this was all a hoax.”

“Me too.” Justin whispered. “But, that’s very real.”

—---

An hour later, Brian and Justin were sitting in the back of a cab headed home. Justin held the ultrasound in his hand. He couldn’t stop running his finger over the lines that made up the shape of their child. Holy fuck they were having a whole ass child.

“We should tell Gus.” Justin stated, his voice hushed, still in awe of everything.

“We should. Do we want to do it tonight or in a few weeks when you hit the second trimester?” Brian asked, wrapping his arm around Justin’s shoulder allowing his hand to come and rest on Justin’s abdomen.

“I think we should do it tonight. We are going to Pittsburgh this weekend. And the family is bound to realize, considering how often foods make me nauseous.” Justin shrugged.

“Oh, we are going are we?” Brian smirked. “I didn’t know you were tagging along. Don’t you have work next week?”

“Nope. Spring Break. I told you two weeks ago I would be off the third week of March.” Justin finally looked up, making eye contact with Brian.

“I didn’t know we’d discussed this.” Brian replied.

“Do you not want me to go?” Justin’s voice wobbled as tears pricked behind his eyes.

Brian saw Justin was on the verge of tears, so he gathered the man up in his arms. “No, not at all. I’d love for you to come. We just hadn’t officially discussed it.” Then he placed a kiss on Justin's temple.

Just then, the cab pulled up to their brownstone. The two climbed out and Brian handed the driver a few bills to cover the charge plus a hefty tip. Justin waited for him on the stoop to avoid going inside and immediately coming in contact with Gus. Brian wrapped his arm around Justin’s waist and they both entered their home. Justin couldn’t help the mushy smile that graced his face at the intimacy Brian was showing him now that they’d officially seen their baby. The sound of someone in the kitchen let them know that Gus was indeed home before them.

Turning the corner, Brian and Justin came face-to-face with not only Gus but Isaac as well. Justin couldn’t wipe the smile off his face fast enough. Gus clocked it immediately and approached them.

“Hold on mom, Dad and Justin just walked in.” Gus turned his phone around to show that Lindsay was on FaceTime with their son.

“Hello, Wendy!” Brian smiled and then moved toward the bathroom, officially leaving Justin to deal with Lindsay and Gus on his own.

Justin shook his head and ducked to hide his knowing smile. “Hey Linds. How are you guys doing?”

“Mel and I are great. J.R. is feeling better than she was this morning. I was just checking in with Gus.” Lindsay looked as though she wanted to ask more questions, but surprisingly Gus cut her off.

“Alright, ma. I will talk to you tomorrow. Love ya.” Then he hung up before she could say more than just her sentiments of mutual love.

Justin walked to the refrigerator and opened it looking for something to whip up quickly for himself and Brian. He called over his shoulder to Gus and Isaac who were still hanging around the kitchen.

“Hey, did you guys eat?”

“Depends. Are you asking because you just want to know or because you’re trying to decide how much to cook?” Gus quipped back, coming to stand next to Justin.

Justin rolled his eyes, turned completely around to face Isaac, “Did you guys eat and are you still hungry?”

Isaac awkwardly looked down at his lap and shrugged his shoulders. Justin smiled and pulled out enough chicken to feed four people. His mind wandered as he cooked. They hadn’t discussed it, but Justin really wanted to tell Gus and Isaac together about the new development in their lives. The chicken was almost done cooking in the oven when Justin’s stomach rolled. He decided to step out of the kitchen until it calmed down.

“Hey, Gus, could you finish the potatoes and take out the chicken when the timer dings?” Justin looked at the younger brunet.

Gus looked at him quizzically, but didn’t say anything as he nodded. Isaac stood up and smiled.

“I’ll help!”

Justin smiled at the teen and squeezed his shoulder as he passed by the blond. “Thanks, Isaac.”

Justin trudged back toward the bathroom where Brian had disappeared. He knew Brian was probably processing everything they’d learned today. The younger man wanted to give his partner the time and space he needed, but they also needed to discuss how they were going to handle everything. With a soft knock, Justin opened the door to the bathroom. He found Brian sitting on the closed toilet, staring at his hands as his fingers interlocked and came apart in a nervous motion.

“Hey,” Justin knelt down to be on Brian’s level. “Talk to me.”

A silence hung in the air as Justin waited for Brian to respond. After what felt like hours, Brian finally looked up and Justin saw his eyes were stormy, but not in an angry way.

“I never wanted kids. I never wanted to risk becoming the drunk asshole that my father was.” Brian whispered.

“I think Gus is proof that you aren’t him. But, if this isn’t something you want…” Justin couldn’t even voice the quiet part out loud.

Brian reached forward, bringing his hand around to cup the back of Justin’s head, “No. I meant that I never wanted kids, but now I can’t imagine us not having this kid. It’s crazy. I hadn’t felt anything one way or the other about you being pregnant until the doctor turned on their heartbeat. It suddenly hit me that I wanted nothing more than to have this baby and raise it with you.”

“Bri,” Justin didn’t have words for the emotions suddenly coursing through him at Brian’s words. Here was a man who for so long dug his heels in about being reminiscent of happy, married heteros and now he was embracing the prospect of having a family with Justin wholeheartedly. Sure, they’d helped guide Gus in his teenage years, but before that Brian had been able to prove his queerness by reminding Justin they weren’t a typical couple.

Brian leaned forward and kissed Justin on the lips. When he pulled back he was smiling. “I hope they are just like you.”

“Considering we have our hands full with your mini me, I’d have to agree.” Justin laughed. “Speaking of which. I want to tell them both.”

Even though Brian didn’t say it, Justin knew he was terrified as hell at the prospect of this new life. Sure, he wanted it, perhaps even as much as Justin, but there was something still scaring him about it all. Brian’s tight hold on his hand as they walked back toward the kitchen proved that.

“Should we do it tonight, over dinner? Or wait?” Brian whispered as they walked.

“I think tonight. We never know when Isaac is going to come around these days.” Justin replied, reaching up to kiss Brian on his cheek.

As they stepped into the dining area just off the kitchen, Justin saw that the boys had set the table and everything was ready to be served. Justin smiled at Gus and Isaac alike. The latter was putting food portions onto four different plates. So, Justin walked up behind him, ruffled his hair, and complimented him on doing a great job. Despite having spent many days at their home over the past 4 years, Isaac still felt insecure whenever he attempted to do something nice for others.

“Wow, dinner looks great. I’m a lucky man.” Brian smiled at Justin, Gus, and Isaac.

“Who are you and what have you done with my father?” Gus looked at Brian’s cheerful demeanor suspiciously. “I thought it was bad enough when you both came home smiling but chalked it up to you probably having a quickie in the cab. But, now it’s just getting weird.”

Justin choked on the water he had just started to sip. Brian snorted and then laughed. “I guess we deserve that. After all, Gus has walked in on us many times.”

“Yeah, but now it’s just weird. You are never this happy. Or if you are, you never show it. Please extract the pod person from your brain so we can go back to normal.” Gus looked between Brian and Justin as the two held hands and smiled at one another.

“Actually, Sonny Boy, there is something Justin and I need to tell you.” Brian muttered, his eyes still on Justin.

Isaac stayed quiet, but started to look nervous. So, Justin let go of Brian’s hand and gave the other teen his full attention. “We wish to tell you as well. After all, you’re part of this family too.”

Isaac smiled a bit at that comment. It warmed Justin’s heart knowing that the love and care he and Brian had given this boy over the years was very much appreciated. He reached over the table and squeezed Isaac’s hand.

“Okay. What’s going on? If you guys were splitting up you wouldn’t be smiling about it. Same goes for if Dad’s cancer was back. So what is it?” Gus wasn’t going for patience.

Justin took a deep breath and looked Gus squarely in the eyes. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the sonogram picture. He quietly handed it over to Gus, who immediately grabbed it. Isaac and Gus poured over the image in silence while Justin nervously watched them.

“So, you’ve hired a surrogate? I mean, that’s what Uncle Mike and Uncle Ben did when they had Violet.” Gus glanced from Justin to his Dad. “Why didn’t you tell me you guys were thinking about having a baby?”

“It’s not a surrogate.” Isaac mumbled, then he pointed to the top of the image so that Gus could see. “It’s Mr. Taylor.”

Gus’s face turned from intrigue to shock and back to intrigue in a matter of seconds. He looked up and passed his gaze between his two dads. Justin wished he could tell what Gus was thinking, but much like his father, the teen was adept at hiding his emotions from his face.

“What do you think?” Justin squeaked out. He nervously squeezed Brian’s hand.

“You’re pregnant? That’s a thing?” Gus asked in shock.

“How are you a chemistry major and you don’t know about male pregnancy?” Isaac added his two cents before turning to Brian and Justin. “I’m happy for you guys.”

“Thank you, Isaac.” Justin whispered.

“Look, I know it’s a thing. I just didn’t think my dads could be part of that.” Gus shrugged.

“Why not. They are male, therefore part of the phenomenon.” Isaac shrugged once more, turning back to the food in front of him.

His utter lack of shock or surprise eased a bit of the tension in Justin’s shoulders, but not all of it. After all, Gus had yet to say how he felt about it. Justin bit the inside of his cheek and watched as Gus continued to stare at the sonogram picture.

“Cool.” He shrugged and handed the image back to Justin. Then he dived into his food without another word.

Justin got up from the table. Gus hadn’t outright said he hated the news, but he also hadn’t been enthusiastic for it either. The blond needed some time to himself. Besides, his stomach was resisting the idea of eating anything at the moment. As he sat down on his and Brian’s bed he casually wondered how Brian was handling his sudden departure from the table.

His mind wandered to his own experiences with his father. Justin had always wanted to have kids and to be the best father he could be. When he was younger he’d thought he would emulate his father because the man had always been wonderful toward him. But, then he’d come out and things devolved quickly, forcing Justin to realize he needed to emulate someone else if he ever wanted to be a dad. Then, when things got serious with Brian he knew fatherhood was never going to be anything more than part-time thanks to Brian’s lack of interest in having a child outside of the one he fathered for Mel and Linds.

Justin is pulled from his thoughts by the feel of Brian’s hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw the older man with concern all over his face. Justin pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes, took a deep breath, and forced himself to smile up at Brian.

“I’m sorry.” Justin heaved, trying to avoid the emotions threatening to boil over.

Brian sat down next to him. He pulled Justin against his chest. “Sorrys are bullshit. You’re allowed to be upset.”

“But, Gus didn’t do anything wrong.” Justin mumbled against Brian’s chest. “Besides, he has every right to resent this baby. Considering the evolution of your relationship with him.”

“He can feel how he feels about it, but he still should’ve been more considerate in how he reacted.” Brain rubbed his hand up and down Justin’s back.

“Brian, he didn’t exactly react at all. I’m just being overly sensitive. I’m happy about this so I hoped everyone else would be.” Justin nuzzled his head into Brian’s neck.

“Just give him time. He will come around. You can’t forget he’s still cagey sometimes about the whole arrangement you and I have. He’s a teenager.” Brian shrugged.

Justin pulled back in surprise. “When did you become the logical, steady one in this relationship?”

“I’ve always been mature and logical.” Brian smirked, knowing full well he used to be a petty mess when he didn’t get his way.

“Sure,” Justin chuckled and then stood up. “I’m hungry. Don’t wait for me.”

[atomicvoid-ao3]

Early morning ramblings… and I think I need a beta reader…

Lol, not me re-reading my latest chapter for my paranormal Steddie fic and seeing all the little errors I made when editing.

Maybe I do need a beta. 😅

But I’m uploading like, multiple chapters a day.

I mean, 4 chapters over 2 days??

The Haunting of Harrington House is sitting at a little over 11,000 words already. And this will probably end up being at least a solid 12 chapters in total. So, if I’m going at this same rate at an average of 2,750 per chapter (which honestly from chapter 5 onwards the length is only going to get longer), I’m looking at my first completed fic being around 33,000 words. 😵‍💫

Maybe having a beta would also help keep me accountable to finish this fic too. I’d definitely feel a bit more pressure (in a good way) if I had someone around waiting to read, “is it done yet? How about now? Where’s the next chapter???” 😂

Hmmm…

How do I find a beta??

This fic probably isn’t going to have anything too graphic, probably same level of spooky and mild horror as the Stranger Things season 4. No explicit sex scenes or anything. But I’m certainly not opposed to writing that for other works, so any beta I have would need to be at least over 18, to read both, and I’d prefer someone closer to my own age (32) — no offense intended whatsoever, I just feel like I’d be more comfortable with a beta that was around the same age, at least late 20s.

Y’all I’ve been so outta the loop with fic writing. My last posted fic was a first person Frerard pov that I never finished. Only got to like 5 or 6 short chapters… 😭 I might even re-use that plot for a Steddie fic cause it lives rent free in my head and was based on the Badlands album by Halsey. This was back in 2017 btw.

Does anyone have a fanfiction or ao3 discord or something I can join and start connecting with other writers?

I swear most of my time on the internet is lurking or shouting out to the void and responding whenever someone shouts back, lol.

Anyway, thanks for reading this. I have an interview to do but otherwise I’ll be busy planning and working on chapter 5 today.

It’s been so much fun cause the more I put out the more ideas come into my head on where to go next. These first chapters felt a bit fast which was the point since that’s how Steve is feeling, but I want the haunting to calm down a bit so the Steddie relationship can start to develop. Which it did at the end of the 4th chapter.

I think I’ll even include Billy in some way… if you’ve read my fic so far you may see how I’m mirroring the show to some extent. I like using actual canon characters.. omg, that just gave me a bunch of great ideas!!!

Damn, this is gonna be good. I’ll definitely have to finish this fic before I start working again.

Later gators! 🐊 ✨

-AV

Linking to the fic for convenience for anyone interested in being a beta. 🖤✨

[imabillyami]

Ten Questions for Writers 

Tagged by my ride or die @shanie 💙 Thank you, love!

(1) How many works do you have on AO3?

Officially, 12. Unofficially, 76.

(2) What's your total AO3 word count?

Officially 48k. Unofficially around 440k.

(3) What fandoms do you write for?

Currently WWE & professional wrestling. Other fandoms (911, Skam, Merlin etc.) in private these days.

(4) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to reply to every comment, but I have Swiss cheese for a brain, so more often than not I’ll forget if I don’t reply right away. So I either reply right away or 6 months later usually. I appreciate and cherish every single comment though! If I don’t reply, it’s really nothing personal and just my memory being botchy.

(5) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yeah. 2 longfics in one of my old fandoms. It’s why I have longstanding beef with wattpad. Cause someone posted my fics over there and when I reported it, wattpad did absolutely nothing about it. I was able to resolve the issue eventually thanks to some help from my lovely readers.

I post to AO3 and tumblr exclusively these days and don’t want to see my work shared anywhere else. 

(6) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Several, yeah. In this fandom I’ve collaborated with @mahi-wayy previously. I’m always open to collabs if the opportunity arises. 

(7) What's your all-time favourite ship?

Can’t pick just one tbh. I’ve been (writing) in plenty of fandoms since I was 13, I’m 29 now, so you do the math. My current favs are Samijey & Ambreigns though. 

(8) What are your writing strengths?

Writing the inner worlds/voices of my characters and conveying their feelings. That, and I think I have a knack for writing lines that just hit you outta nowhere. (I'd maybe add trauma awareness to that.)

(9) What are your writing weaknesses?

I have a couple. The biggest one is probably that whenever I write, I pretty much forget and neglect everything else (food, sleep, human interaction). When I’m in the tunnel, there’s no good way of getting me out of it. If I can’t get into the writing tunnel, I don’t write at all usually, due to my really short attention span. A lot of things really have to line up for me to be able to sit down for a lengthy writing session. 

The other one is my writing speed. I’m a rather slow writer, cause I’m constantly second guessing myself and every sentence I write. 

I’m rather harsh with my own writing and probably my own worst critic. I’m huge on rewriting and editing stuff and taking time to try and make everything I write the best version it possibly can be. 

(10) First fandom you wrote for?

Either High School Musical or Queer as Folk US. Both back when I was 13. I dunno which one came first tbh. They were closely back-to-back lol. 😂 

Tagging: @mahi-wayy 💛 Pretty much everyone else I know and love, I've seen tagged already, I think (apologies if I'm forgetting about anyone, please consider yourself tagged by me!)

[kadajsbitch]

Hey 💀

So this is a side blog I started two years ago but I’ve been going through the worst case of writers block EVER, and I believe I’ve finally got out of that. But before I want to commit to returning to Ao3 and making stories, I wanted to start small so… I’m here lol (back to my roots right after Wattpad 🥹)

Anyways, I have an official Tumblr account. I don’t remember the name atm but I’ll probably come here and edit it in when I’m not lazy enough to go look. (Even then, I only have one post over there from last year I think but still 🤡 if everything goes well, on this blog, I definitely want to be more active over there.

Anyways, here’s my rules for taking request:

NSFW REQUEST: no underage, race play, scat/piss/vomit, homophobia, forced sort of things. I will block your ass and not write for you.

RUSHING: Do NOT rush me. Whole point of this blog is for me to hopefully find the fun in being creative again after the long period of writers block I had. I would like to have about a three days window after a post. Some days I might triple post or even post stuff within the three days I usually write.

SUPPORT: As of now, I mainly post headcannons, but I will write longer paragraphs about things I like or requested to write about. With that being said, please PLEASE like and re-share if you actually do like my stuff. While I’m doing this blog more so for me, it would help to have that extra motivation lol.

Okay! Those are my three golden rules as of now. I may exspand to them later on, or edit them but now time for fandoms I write for:

Final Fantasy VII

The Arcana

Lies of P

Devil May Cry

DC: Batman

Castlevania

Deathnote

Attack On Titan

Pokémon (I love Guzma ❤️)

Skyrim

I think that’s all for now, but thanks and I look forward to writing more lol

-Kadajsbitch

[crystaiskiess]

Okay, first, I had planned to post something today in honor of s3 (!!!) (another one of those scene + show edits) but didn’t have the time, but I’m going to make one like this week (maybe end up using scenes from this chapter because aaaa).  Second, I have so many thoughts about this chapter that I’m going to leave a comment on it on ao3.  So, here are my aaaaa thoughts and my ao3 comment will probably actually sound coherent lol.

The relationships!!!  I love how you write relationships in their complexities.  Morgana and Arthur’s relationship being a focus in this really fits, especially the difference in the beginning versus the end.

All he could feel was her absence. They were like two pieces of cotton woven to make a string, his life does not exist if not alongside hers. Even when they were not directly interacting he would see her at every moment throughout the day. Now, her empty seat at dinner seems to dominate the space, consuming his attention, memories of her in the halls and his chambers haunt him like a ghost. The one time he dared to go to her chambers the emptiness felt like an aching wound. Morgana entered his life when he was five years old, he doesn’t know a time when she wasn’t in the castle with him. She has always been a sister to him, and he misses her like a limb.

That being in the first four paragraphs, god my heart was being torn out of my chest already.  I knew the chapter would hurt, but I hadn’t been expecting it to hurt that fast.  I sat down, finally able to read after running errands, and was immediately kicked in the chest at full force.  Then we have Morgana’s perspective later, and once again, kicked in the chest.

Morgana looks up from the cauldron with a start. “Not Arthur.”

That one line had me have to stop for a second because I love the dynamic.  They love each other so very dearly that they see each other as siblings without even knowing they’re siblings.  Often times, we don’t get to see that explored in fics because it’s kind of hard to know in canon.  Or at least my opinion because we don’t understand if Morgana has entirely changed or there’s still some “good” (for a lack of a better word) left in her.

I will say that Gwen’s pov of Morgana actually made me want to sob.  Honestly, your writing just makes me feel all the emotions of the characters, so it’s not surprising that they’re in some distress that I’m in distress.  As I’ve said before, you have such a strength in emotion writing.  If you have any tips, please share because I’m always blown away every time I read OAFK (which has been several times). 

Where Gwen had once kept careful distance, Morgana pulled her in with both hands into her open arms. They grew beyond the role of maid and mistress, developing a true friendship that Gwen cherishes more than most other things in her life.

I’m trying to not like quote it too much, because it makes these get so long but it’s these two sentences that just started off their established relationship and getting ready to see what it is now.  Also, the knowledge of how Morgana feels/felt for Gwen doesn’t make it hurt but does at the same time.  I’m pretty sure it’s chapter nine where we’re introduced to Morgana’s love for Gwen, but it’s chapter thirteen where she thinks that Gwen knows she loves her (or maybe I misinterpreted that).  They both love each other so deeply, regardless of if in different ways, and seeing that fall apart a little just hurts.  It hurts Gwen, so it hurts me.

I have many thoughts and feelings about Morgana and Merlin, but that will make this probably 2k+ words long, and I’ll just do it in a comment on the chapter!  Also, do not feel bad about changing the update schedule!!!  You take the time you need to update!  There’s nearly 300k words currently, we can just reread it a million times.  It’s fun because you get to see more and more details every time!

HELLO !! im so sorry it took me so long to get to this, i read it immediately but it made me so happy i truly didn't know how to respond (also genuinely squealed over your ao3 comment too, you dont know how much it means to read analysis about my work i love it so much thank you)

morgana and arthur's dynamic is truly one of the most important things to me so im so glad you enjoyed this chapter and how i addressed them, i feel like the idea of her turning truly on arthur seems impossible to me when he technically had done nothing to her yet to make her feel betrayed, so it was important to me to show how much they love each other (this may come to hurt teehee)

and yes gwen and morgana !!!! the tragedy of what happens to them shouldnt be overlooked and there's absolutely more of that to come so look forward to that 👀

and thank you for your kind words about the update schedule !! it means a lot, it wasn't my ideal situation but id much rather continue posting regularly and just more spaced apart than have to hiatus so its the way it has to be !!

seriously thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind comments and all your thoughts i keep coming back to them it just makes me so happy !! and thank you again for reading !!

[kuwdora]

ao3 wrapped ask: 12, 13, 14

12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

Eeee, WIPs. Mayoho, you oughta know what a loaded question this is lol. I always have ten million WIPs that I love and want to work on and finish. So many.

On the top of my WIP pile is is probably my yennskier/geraskefer silly soft sex story. The way my brain is going I’ll probably finish that in January instead of December like I wish. I have my book/game Ciri grief feels thing that I have been hiccuping about for months now. And ahhhHHhhh, I got my Yen/Jaskier post-Thanedd hurt/comfort thing that is either gonna be a cozy 4k or another 10k sauna of feelings. Just gotta work on it some more before I figure that out. Those are probably the closest to getting done enough for me to post soon. “Soon” fjskfjslkjfs. Other WIPs of note: I also have a book/game Yennefer thing I started drafting in June that I want to circle back to again. Fic is about Yen and Freyja with a nice dose of Geralt Loving Yennefer. I have quite a bit of my Jaskier/Oxenfurt series already drafted. There’s a few witcher rare pair things I’d started and put aside (Yen/Phil, Jaskier/Dijkstra) that I would like to finish too. I have my nascent Tissaia-lives AU that my brain wants to chomp on. And alllll of my Leshy Eskel stuff. It would also be remiss of me not to acknowledge that I have another like 3k of Vilgefortz stuff drafted, heh. I have some yennskier kink WIPs and more role reversal Geralt and Jaskier things and… on and on. Too Many WIPs. Also that Radskier Hansa thing that’s not quite a thing yet but should be, eheh. 13. What’s your longest work of the year?

Longest work is Coin Operated Boy which is 25,928. And actually it should be longer cause I found a slightly different draft with some more Cory and Jaskier details in my Scrivener binder that I really like and wish I had put in. So really it should be like 27 or 28k... but I was getting kind of feral and lost my mind with editing towards the end there and just dropped it without including the rest of their backstory. 14. What’s your shortest work of the year?

I wrote (and posted—that’s the important distinction) 10 fics less than 1000 words this year. Here are some of my favorites:

Insomnia, Cahir/Regis, 712 words. Masturbation and sleep deprivation and voyeurism, oh my.

Golden Opportunity, 166 which is Jaskier and Vernon Roche in captivity.

Shadowdancer, 118, Geralt/Istredd cozy handjob.

Polite, 100 words. Vespula pegging and Jaskier begging.

ao3 wrapped [writer's edition]

[folklauerate]

That neighbors AU sounds really good. I can't wait to read it! Do you think it will be just as long as that oneshot where Anthony is the one that's older? And I'm very curious about the baby. Do you know if it will be a boy or a girl? And who will the baby call daddy, Tom or Anthony?

I’m glad you’re excited!! I’m excited too!!

I have no clue how long it will be. I thought the Older Anthony one would be around 10k and then an extra 27k just happened. Right now I’ve written bits and pieces of the Older Kate one, and I have a basic, bare bones plot outline, and it’s a little under 3k. Truly, who knows! I get in the zone when writing and I discover more and more about the characters as I go sometimes; I also discover more about the story I want to tell and that helps shape it, and ends up changing my estimated word count.

It’s really important to note that the Older Anthony oneshot felt really different and was really different from the way I write most of my other fics. Literally 99% of my fics are lucky to have a second pair of eyes on them before I hit post—sometimes I don’t even proof-read them until I hit post and then I scan the page for mistakes and stuff lmfao. I am genuinely always flying by the seat of my damn pants. I think about the fic, write the fic, and go post! And then the cycle starts anew. “lost in your current like a priceless wine” was SO different because the beautiful wonderful amazing Kara (the lovely Amalinwrites on ao3 and @amalinwrites here)was basically betaing/cheering me on/in the trenches with me for this au from the get go, like we’d wake up and text each other about this 😭 so she was there to help me bounce ideas off of and she was the one who inspired the ending, where Anthony goes to a conference and they miss each other! Then I asked the literal loml Nel ( @grantairesbottle here and starkswinterfelling on ao3) to beta/vibe check/read over a significant chunk of the oneshot, probably about 60-70% of it, so I got her feedback and some notes. I also took much longer to write this oneshot than I usually do. It took me a little less than two weeks to write it, which is markedly longer than any other fic, and I was also reading, re-reading, and editing bits of it. It just felt like I was on the cusp of something new and different and I wanted to get it right. I also have been kicking myself for not sitting on things long enough with my writing—I’m very impatient. I always read things back and wish I’d changed things or sat with it longer to allow it to percolate in my brain so I could edit and make it really proper and good. This oneshot was me doing just that, and trying to see what would happen if I did do that.

All this to say—I have no clue how long the other oneshot will come out though I might try and take a similar amount of care and time with it. Or maybe I won’t! Idk! I also have a ton of wips that need updating lmfao.

I also won’t spoil anything about the gender of the baby because I have some ideas but I also don’t know if I’ll even reveal it or not or if I want it to be a surprise at the end 👀 However, the baby definitely won’t be calling Tom dad lol; he’s the sperm donor and he’s Kate’s longtime friend and he was happy to be there for her when she decided she was going to get pregnant by herself!

Sorry for the HUGE response lol

[imagineitdearies-old]

I tried to leave a comment on your new Duty & Sacrifice chapter via ao3 but it wouldn’t go through so I’ll leave it here instead:

Such a good chapter as always.

“Inwardly, Aemond decided Dragonstone had to be much farther than the maps depicted—or else another world entirely.”

This was my favorite line this chapter! I love when writers write. Like crafting such a lovely sentence to show how differently Aemond & Lucerys think, as well as their polar opposite upbringing.

I’ve commented before that Alicent & Aemond’s mother-son bond is my favorite thing about this fic and was my main draw (and this is still true!) but I can’t help but feel that Alicent’s tears are wasted on Aemond. Helaena is the one Alicent should be crying for and on her knees begging forgiveness from for forcing her into an abusive marriage since she was only thirteen. I like how it’s clear in this fic that Helaena is uncomfortable with her mother for asking her about Aegon’s whereabouts after she forced her to marry him.

I couldn’t feel anything in the face of Alicent’s remorse because all I could think about was her other child who is suffering a much worse fate than Aemond, and who doesn’t even have half the doting and affection Alicent showers on Aemond. Alicent says herself that she tried her best to shield Aemond from suffering a fate like hers, but she never tried for Helaena before forcing her into marriage and motherhood when she was even younger than Alicent had been when she wed Viserys.

Also I like how you showed that there was a moment when Aemond wished his father loved him. By the time Duty & Sacrifice began, Aemond felt nothing for Viserys so it’s interesting to me that that was not always the case.

thank you so much for the kind words anon 😭 i enjoyed writing that sentence (and even more, editing it before posting so it sounded good, lol) so it's super cool it stuck out to you :)

in regards to alicent, i did want to clarify that i've aged people up in this timeline a lot, so helaena definitely wasn't 13 when she married aegon. probably 17ish--though yeah that doesn't change the fact she was married to *aegon* who for sure isn't a great guy in d&s either.

idk if this will ever get brought up in the fic (tho maybe in an alicent pov one day), so I'll just tell you, in my 'verse i imagine it had more to do with alicent being unwilling to let helaena get married off to some distant noble. knowing that aegon had zero interest in his sister, and given that alicent *does* have some control over her son still, she knew she could protect helaena better this way. this on top of strengthening the bloodline, which viserys was all for.

and indeed, in d&s aegon and helaena only have the twins, who were conceived on their wedding night 😂 besides then he's made a pass at her a couple of times when extremely drunk, but that's about it. so even though by our standards it's a sucky awful marriage, given how irresponsible and rude aegon can be, by alicent's standards this was the best choice for both of them. (funny, but i think helaena would agree with that, and it'd be aegon who would disagree)

now, why didn't alicent just marry aegon and aemond? because she guessed (correctly) aegon *would* have interest in his little omega brother, and that terrified her. aegon in general scares her. plus, aemond was already decently protected from getting married off by the time her kids were of age and alicent had to consider all this (aegon 19, helaena 17, aemond 16), because of his scar and general un-omeganess. obviously that didn't hold up forever, and she knew it wouldn't, but alicent views helaena as someone who could be broken very easily vs. aemond as someone who could weather dealing with any situation (regardless of how true that is)

all this to say, it was definitely a calculated thing alicent did, but in this 'verse it wasn't just for the sake of usurping rhaenyra like is implied in hotd canon. hopefully that makes sense! and thanks for the ask, it was fun to explain a piece of how the d&s verse played out inside my head :) aemond's head is very limited lol!

[kyzveryown]

I've been slowly (and I mean that literally) working on the second part of the KH: Lore Rework Series. It's turned into a fanfiction now, which means it'll be a long time before I complete it. It's still going to be part of the Rework series though. The best way I can describe it right now would be that it's similar to FFVII Remake. Basically, it's the same story but re-imagined with some major and minor differences (no plot ghosts though lol).

I just finished with the Foretellers' Cases. Once I'm done reading through and editing them, I'll post them here. I probably should post it to Ao3 but I ain't brave enough to put my shit on there lol. I've only used that website once like 12 years ago. Anyway, that'll be up soon. Even though I'm not expecting KHIV to show up at next week's Playstation showcase, I do hope we hear something about it soon. Either that or Missing Link.

[sunshowerdandelion]

I posted 1,503 times in 2022

That's 1,503 more posts than 2021!

17 posts created (1%)

1,486 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@wakasagihimes-pond

@oriko-mikuni

@mimicteruyo

@ak794itomugi

@ushizaki-urumi

I tagged 1,448 of my posts in 2022

Only 4% of my posts had no tags

#touhou - 1,377 posts

#reisen udongein inaba - 148 posts

#marisa kirisame - 121 posts

#reimu hakurei - 109 posts

#fujiwara no mokou - 74 posts

#kaguya houraisan - 73 posts

#alice margatroid - 61 posts

#sanae kochiya - 41 posts

#keine kamishirasawa - 38 posts

#fanfiction - 37 posts

Longest Tag: 122 characters

#touhou is probably like smack dab in the middle or somewhere close to it with the amount of fluff and darkfic that it gets

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Chapter 30 of Hour of the Rabbit is out!

Highlights include: Kaguya playing a Castlevania on a Gameboy Pocket (to Reisen’s concern), headcanons about her power, lesbian literature, and Reisen worrying about everything as usual.

Sorry this chapter took longer to come out!

6 notes - Posted July 30, 2022

#4

Chapter 31 of Hour of the Rabbit is out!

Highlights include: being a moon rabbit exile, 1920s Japan, Alias Grace, and how both Reisen and Kaguya avoid the topic of death.

6 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#3

Shadowbans

Apparently tumblr being the hellsite that it is has shadowbanned me lol. I can’t access my messages (DMs), my replies don’t show up, my notes don’t show up etc. Thanks to everyone who told me this was happening~ Have contacted support

EDIT: Is apparently a glitch. Apparently if you’re also afflicted with this glitch the best solution is to email support@tumblr.com directly instead of using the support form.

PS: I can still see everyone’s reblogs and stuff!! I just can’t reply to them for some reason.

8 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#2

Fanfiction Links

This is a list of my completed and ongoing fics! I post as Sunshowersy on AO3, and I write slice-of-life Touhou fics and shippy stuff, sometimes with smut.

I will update this as I post my new fic chapters, so stay tuned! Otherwise, I’ll also update the blog, using the tag sunshowersyfics to announce updates.

Fics

Reisen Adjacent

"Since she is not originally a creature of Earth, she cannot get along with humans very well. She can change her personality completely to match her circumstances." - Touhou Kaeidzuka ~ Phantasmagoria of Flower View Official Profile for Reisen Udongein Inaba.

A series of interrelated shorts about Reisen Udongein Inaba as seen through the eyes of the villagers who interact with her. Circa 2006-2010. Expect a more Lunatic, less earthy Reisen.

4 short stories:

The Morning Bamboo Vignette (A young bamboo cutter encounters Reisen.)

Afternoon on the Galactic Railroad (A seer of sorts encounters Reisen.)

A Student of the Art (A traditional Japanese medicine practitioner attempts to teach Reisen.)

A Visit (The seer encounters Reisen again. Epilogue to the fic.)

Hour of the Rabbit

"Personality: Both carefree and crazed." - Touhou Kaeidzuka ~ Phantasmagoria of Flower View Official Profile for Reisen Udongein Inaba.

Reisen Udongein Inaba, moon rabbit deserter and exile, wants to bed fellow exile and immortal Princess Kaguya. However, before that, she'll have to deal with her past, her feelings, her body, her Princess herself, her former mentors, Earth...

A coming of age story (with occasional sex) about anxiety, awkwardness, and grit in the face of the former two. Set in 2005, a few months before POFV. Expect the terror and pleasure of first times, and a more worry-prone, less earthy Reisen.

Warnings: has smut, selfcest, dream smut, anxiety attacks, descriptions of injury, and copious amounts of awkwardness.

Chapter-by-chapter, starting from Chapter 1.

Thank you for checking out my fics, if you do! Comments are always welcome~

12 notes - Posted March 23, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Chapters 32 and 33 of Hour of the Rabbit are out!

Highlights include: a colposcopy with Eirin! Reisen changing(?) Also, fire.

Sorry guys I promised chapter 32 would be the last and it sort of is, I just had to split it into 3 parts. Thank you for reading~

17 notes - Posted November 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[harryissuchalittleshit]

Hey! New reader here, I just came across your story Karma on ao3 and oh boy what that fic was! The right amount angst, romance, fluff it was a complete trip! ❤️ You mentioned that youd write Lily Luna story in it but couldn't find it anywhere. Can I please get the link? Thank you 💝

Hello!!! Thank you so much for your kind words about Karma, that story was so fun to write and I’m so happy you enjoyed it!! I absolutely loved writing some older Potter children.

Now I know I mentioned something about a Lily Luna story, that was because I was currently in the process of writing that story! And let me tell you, I just finished it a week ago, yay!!! So I have not posted it yet, to give my readers the best story, I need a little bit of time away from the story so I can come back with fresh eyes and edit the story. Currently our girl Lily Luna is in a relaxing period before I fuck up her life again lol.

But I want to be nice, so I’ll give you a little sneak peek of the first chapter under the cut. And I plan on starting to post at the end of September/beginning of October! So just please give me a few weeks to edit and take a break from our girl.

“One hour, Susan asked us that,” said Ginny from the front passenger seat, and Lily crossed her arms from where she sat in the back, right behind the driver’s seat, behind her Daddy.

“I just…I need a moment before I go in there,” whispered Harry, and Lily wanted to reach forward and grab for her Daddy’s hand, but both of his were on the steering wheel. Funerals always brought out the worst in her parents, her Daddy’s guilty conscious and her mum’s deep fear of dying.

“Lily and I will go in first, come in when you can,” said Ginny, reaching over and squeezing Harry’s arm, the dark clothes they were all wearing washing all of the hard fought color they all got over the summer months.

It was mid-August, in two weeks Lily would be back to school, back with her friends and Weasley cousins.

“Lily,” said Ginny, her voice a little sharp and Lily sat up straighter, “come on, let’s go darling.”

Lily stepped out of the car, feeling too warm in her long sleeved black dress, completely plain with nothing to make it even a little special…the same dress her mum used to wear to funerals when she was Lily’s age. She took her mum’s hand as they walked up the neat little walk to the clean and tidy little house that looked the same as all the others on the street and last street and probably the next street over. Something about all of the plain, boring, sameness, she couldn’t imagine growing up in a place like this.

“Don’t talk about anything magical, even to Susan and Dudley,” whispered Ginny and Lily nodded as her mum squeezed her hand tightly. “This is really hard for your dad, so don’t push him to talk when we’re driving home.”

“Yes mum,” said Lily as they entered the house, it was impossibly clean despite the amount of people milling about and eating off of small plates. Lily immediately found the only bit of color in the room, the kids didn’t really have any dark clothes, especially baby Amelia and Auntie Susan had wrapped her up in the pink blanket that Lily had bought her and embroider her name in, Amelia Clara.

Jacob was dressed in a dark green sweater and dark pants, while Eleanor was in a purple dress with white ruffles, and Lily had never been more jealous in her life.

“Here you go,” said Susan, handing Lily her youngest daughter, “I need to find Dudley, make sure he isn’t listening to his mother.”

Lily looked down at Amelia, taking in her wispy blonde hair and chubby little cheeks, the pink and white onesie that she was sure was once Eleanor’s. Amelia was beautiful and currently her parents youngest goddaughter, and Lily had been spending nearly every Monday from ten in the morning to whenever her Auntie Susan sent her home at night. She just helped her aunt around the house, watching Jacob and Eleanor or doing chores or holding baby Amelia because she wanted to be held.

“Come on you two,” said Lily, gently nudging Jacob and Eleanor over to the small empty space on the couch that was mostly occupied by one obscenely large woman. She sat down and pulled Eleanor up into her lap, brushing her fingers through her gingery-red hair.

“Ugh freckles,” said the woman beside Lily, and Lily couldn’t help but look at her, immediately regretting it as she stared back at her. “Absolutely ruins your whole face, and that one too!”

“Excuse me?” said Lily, not quite sure to think of the insult.

“Like little orange pock marks!”

Lily turned to Eleanor, she was three, would be four in October, she looked just like Auntie Susan with her big brown eyes and shy smiles. Just like her mother, Eleanor’s kindness and sweetness and smiles were all hard fought, and Lily had been fighting hard for those smiles since she was little kid.

“She’s three,” said Lily, turning back to the woman as Eleanor’s eyes welled up with tears. “This is her grandfather’s funeral, you should be respectful to the family.”

The woman beside Lily left out a huff and snarl as large as she was, lifting a finger to Lily’s face, “how dare you little brat! How did you even get here? This funeral is only for close family and friends and my brother-“

“Aunt Marge,” said Harry, suddenly appearing in front of Lily and picking up Eleanor, hauling her into his arms and grabbing Lily’s arm with a sharp tug. “As always it’s horrible to see you, please don’t speak to my daughter.”

Lily had heard her Daddy speak to Aurors under his authority in the same curt and flat tone, the simmer of anger in his eyes but absent from his actual voice. It wasn’t a tone she liked, even if it was never used at her or her brothers.

She let herself be pulled away, grabbing Jacob’s little hand in her own as they went. They found her mum and Auntie Susan out in the back garden, where all the flower beds were completely immaculate and tidy, nothing like the garden at any of the homes she knew.

“We need to go,” said Harry, as he put Eleanor down on the grass and fixed her hair with shaky hands. “Suz I know we promised and I’m sorry to Dudley bu-“

“How dare you!”

Lily stared at the old woman, her steel grey hair and angry dark eyes, she came out into the garden with an old frying pan in her hand, followed by Uncle Dudley. Just as the old woman was about to swing the pan at Harry, it flew out of her hand.

“Why you-“

“No.”

Lily felt herself smile as Eleanor stepped forward, her little body completely calm and still as she pointed her finger at her grandmother. She looked every bit like a tiny little witch, her wild red hair and red cheeks, her little mary janes all shiny and bright, her purple and white ruffled dress flowing in the breeze. But nothing was louder than her voice, than her dark eyes trained on the angry old woman before her, a true witch like her namesakes Eleanor Bones and Lillian Evans.

[bythehearts]

So, I found your blog on the jegulily tag and I've been scrolling through your posts for a couple of hours now and just can't seem to find your ao3 link (the post you made was about a fic I'd love to read lol) it may be sleep deprivation, but I need help finding your fics :D much love!!

this is literally the oldest ask, I’m sorry, I just realized I had some in my inbox, but I’m just using it because I’ve gotten similar comments before. I think the fic you may be referring to would be “The Afterlife of Regulus Black” but unfortunately that fic never came to be. Tbf i’m not sure why it was under the jegulily tag, that might’ve been a mistag on my part, because there’s never any poly jegulily in it, just James kind of existing in between the two versions of himself that loved Lily and Regulus. Ultimately, I came to realize i just can’t write jily so i abandoned it 😅 but also like the way I interpret the characters, and my writing style, and just my fandom experience in general has changed so much since I thought of that fic that I’m not even sure it would make sense for me to pick it back up.

I do have a few bits and pieces I might post as a series of one shots though, if I do get around editing them? I don’t make any promises, but I might. I’ll also leave the tag for the fic in case you still want to look at what I’ve done for it. It’s not much, and I mostly hate it now tbf, but yk, it is there.

My ao3 username is still bythehearts and a link to all my published fics can be found in my masterlist. If it’s not there, it’s probably rotting away in my wips folder I’m afraid. Or, i wrote it and then didn’t like it enough to post it. Either way, um… whoopsie?