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reidmarieprentiss · 11 months ago

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Bridges to Belonging

Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven

Summary: Y/n needed a new gig to bring in a little extra cash while she finished her PhD research at the hospital. The Hotchners are looking for a nanny for their infant son, Jack.

Spencer is not in this part, just introducing Y/n to the team!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Category: Backstory

Warnings/Includes: none!

Word count: 1.3k

a/n: hi!! i am so back in my spencer reid shit it is insane. here goes me writing a self indulgent fanfic because i can't get this idea out of my head. let me know what you think!!

main masterlist

Washington, D.C. - Spring 2005

The small conference room at the hospital was dimly lit, the faint hum of fluorescent lights overhead. Y/n L/n sat at the long table, reviewing her notes for her dissertation on child psychology. The hospital had been her second home for the past few years, a place where she could immerse herself in her research while pursuing her passion for helping children.

As she packed up her things, her phone buzzed with a text message from a friend, forwarding a job listing.

*Nanny needed for newborn. Reliable, experienced, and patient. Contact Haley Hotchner at [xxx-xxx-xxxx].*

Y/n considered the opportunity, her mind calculating the benefits of having some extra income while she completed her PhD. Besides, she loved working with children. After a moment’s thought, she dialed the number.

“Hello, this is Haley Hotchner,” a warm voice answered.

“Hi, Haley, my name is Y/n L/n. I’m calling about the nanny position. I’m currently finishing my PhD in psychology and have experience working with children,” Y/n explained, her voice steady but hopeful.

“Wonderful! We’re looking for someone who can become part of our family, especially with Aaron’s demanding job. Can we meet for an interview?” Haley asked, her tone inviting and sincere.

“Of course, I’d love to,” Y/n replied, feeling a flutter of excitement at the prospect.

---

Y/n arrived at the Hotchner residence a week later, it was a quaint home in a quiet neighborhood. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door, smoothing her hair as she waited. The door opened to reveal a smiling Haley Hotchner, holding a sleeping baby in her arms.

“You must be Y/n! Come in, please,” Haley greeted her warmly.

As Y/n stepped inside, she felt an immediate sense of comfort and belonging. The home was cozy, filled with family photos and the soft scent of baby powder.

Haley led Y/n to the living room, where Aaron Hotchner sat, looking relaxed in casual clothes, a stark contrast to his usual suits. He stood to shake her hand, his demeanor polite and welcoming.

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/n,” Aaron said, his handshake firm but friendly. “Haley has told me good things about you.”

“Thank you, Mr. Hotchner. It’s a pleasure to meet you both,” Y/n replied, smiling as she sat down.

“Please, call me Aaron,” he insisted, exchanging a glance with Haley.

The interview was less formal than Y/n had anticipated. Aaron and Haley asked her about her studies, her experience with children, and her aspirations. She, in turn, learned about their lives, Aaron’s work with the FBI, and their hopes for raising Jack in a loving environment.

“We’re really looking for someone who can be a part of Jack’s life as he grows,” Haley explained, gently rocking Jack in her arms. “Someone we can trust.”

Y/n nodded, feeling a connection with the couple. “I’d love to be that person. Working with children is my passion, and I think I could learn a lot from Jack, too.”

Aaron smiled, looking at Haley before turning back to Y/n. “We’d like to offer you the position, Y/n. If you will take it, we want to welcome you to the family.”

Y/n beamed, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. “Thank you, Aaron, Haley. I promise to do my best for Jack and your family.”

---

Over the next two years, Y/n became an integral part of the Hotchner household. She cared for Jack with a dedication that went beyond her job description, forming a bond with the infant that was almost maternal. She found herself spending evenings with Haley, talking about life, love, and dreams. Aaron, despite his demanding job, always made time to catch up with Y/n, appreciating her insight into Jack’s development and her ability to connect with people. As Jack neared his second birthday, Y/n knew her time as his nanny was coming to an end. He was ready to start preschool, and she had secured a position at the hospital as a child psychologist. Yet, leaving the Hotchners felt like leaving a part of her own family.

On her last day as Jack’s nanny, Y/n sat in the backyard with Haley, watching Jack play in the autumn leaves.

“We’re going to miss you, Y/n,” Haley said, her voice tinged with sadness. “You’re like a sister to us.”

Y/n smiled, touched by Haley’s words. “I’m going to miss you all too. You’ve been my family here.”

Haley nodded, tears in her eyes. “Promise you’ll visit? Jack will need his Aunt Y/n around.”

“Always,” Y/n promised, her heart full. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

---

Life moved on, but Y/n never lost touch with the Hotchners. She visited often, spending time with Jack as he grew into a lively toddler. Her work at the hospital kept her busy, but she cherished the moments she could steal away to see them.

One evening, as she was leaving the hospital, her phone buzzed with a text from Aaron.

We’re going out for drinks to celebrate a closed case. Care to join us?

Y/n smiled at the invitation, feeling a warmth at the thought of seeing Aaron and meeting his team. She quickly replied.

I’d love to! Where should I meet you?

---

Y/n walked into the bar, scanning the room for a familiar face. She spotted Aaron standing with a group of people, all engaged in animated conversation.

As she approached, Aaron waved her over, a rare smile on his usually serious face.

“Y/n! Glad you could make it,” Aaron greeted, introducing her to the team. “Everyone, this is Y/n L/n. She used to be Jack’s nanny and is basically family.”

Y/n smiled and waved, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. “Hi, everyone! It’s great to meet you all.”

Penelope Garcia, the team’s tech-savvy and flamboyant analyst, immediately stepped forward, her eyes bright with curiosity. “Oh my gosh, I love your outfit! Finally, someone who appreciates the art of pink as much as I do!”

Y/n laughed, relieved by Penelope’s enthusiasm and excited to have her brand new top appreciated. “Thank you! I knew I’d find a kindred spirit.”

Jennifer “JJ” Jareau, the team’s communications liaison, offered a warm handshake. “Aaron’s told us a lot about you. It’s nice to finally meet the woman who kept him sane during those early days.”

“Glad to be here,” Y/n replied, feeling welcomed.

Emily Prentiss, with her confident and approachable demeanor, chimed in. “So, you survived being a Hotchner family member? You deserve a medal.”

Y/n grinned, appreciating the camaraderie. “It wasn’t so bad. I’m just glad I didn’t have to deal with any of Aaron’s work stress.”

Derek Morgan, the charming and confident agent, leaned back with a smirk. “If you ever want to switch from psychology to profiling, we could use someone with your skills.”

Y/n laughed, shaking her head. “I’ll leave the profiling to you guys. I’m happy helping kids find their way.”

David Rossi, the seasoned agent with a love for fine wine and stories, raised his glass in a toast. “To new friends and old family.”

Y/n joined in the toast, feeling a sense of belonging with this eclectic group. As the night wore on, she found herself bonding with each team member, sharing stories and laughter. They talked about everything from childhood dreams to favorite music, forming connections that would last beyond this night.

As the evening wound down, Derek leaned over with a grin. “You’ll have to meet our boy wonder next time. Spencer’s a little shy, but I have a feeling you two would get along.”

Y/n nodded, intrigued by the prospect of another lively team member to add to her seemingly growing list of friends. “I’d like that. I’ve heard a lot about him.”

Emily chimed in, a playful glint in her eyes. “Spencer’s one of a kind. You’ll see what we mean.”

#spencer reid fanfiction #doctor spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x reader #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #penelope garcia #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #david rossi #criminal minds #criminal minds fandom #bau team #bau family #haley hotchner #jack hotchner

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academic-assistance · 2 years ago

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Are you navigating the intricate landscape of crafting a psychology dissertation? Join us on our latest episode, "Psychology Dissertation Help: How to Work with Your Writer and Get the Best Results." In this insightful discussion, we unravel the secrets to effective collaboration between you and your dissertation writer. Learn valuable tips and strategies to maximize the impact of your research, ensuring that your psychology dissertation not only meets academic standards but stands out as a noteworthy contribution to the field. Tune in for expert guidance on optimizing the writer-student partnership and achieving the best possible outcomes for your psychology dissertation.

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its-luna-noel · 1 month ago

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fluctuations of the mind | jason todd x reader

02. wilde

summary: working at the local library while you work on your phd thesis seems like the perfect fit. you don't expect it to bring your childhood friend back to you after over a decade. now that you have him back, you refuse to let him go, no matter the challenges you face together.

contents: 18+, MDNI, f!reader, english phd student reader, fluff, angst, smut, drinking & drugs, past abuse, trauma, mental health issues, mental instability, ptsd, depression, suicidal ideation, classic literature, dark academia

word count: 2.4k

chapter 2/? (probably 20ish) prev chapter | next chapter

masterlist | link to ao3

notes: hello! specific content warning for this chapter: drug use. thanks for reading!

“Behind every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic.”

― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

It’s quiet between you and Jason for a few moments as you both sip at your drinks. You’re keeping your eyes on him, making sure he doesn’t either up and run or just disappear into thin air like he did last time.

You weren’t lying when you said you won’t let him leave again.

“So,” Jason soon asks around his mug, “how’s school going?”

You shrug a little. “Good.”

The corner of his mouth twitches. “That’s all I get?”

You huff playfully, your own smile curving your lips. You gaze at him for a moment, examining him. You like seeing him smile. “It’s really nice, actually. I’m starting my research and writing the thesis for my dissertation right now, and I’ll have it approved by my advisor in a few weeks.”

“What are you writing about?”

“Crime and Punishment.”

He hums, eyes lighting up. “Dostoyevsky, huh? What’s your angle?”

“Not a hundred percent sure yet, I’m still looking at sources. Something about the psychology of murder through his writings or something.” Your eyes shift away, suddenly shy.

“Hey,” he says, nudging your foot under the table, “don’t be embarrassed. It’s okay not to know what you’re writing yet. You’ve got time.”

You offer a weak smile. “Anyway, what have you been up to?”

Jason blinks, seeming surprised you asked about him, which is silly because of course you did. You want to know everything about him, want to know what he’s been up to since you were kids.

“I, uh,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I have an…internship.”

You chirp, “Oh, cool! What kind of internship?”

“Uhh,” he says again, and you’re not sure if he’s embarrassed to admit it, “I can’t…really talk about it. Signed, like, an NDA and stuff….”

“Oh.” You deflate a little; you won’t lie, it disappoints you, to have secrets between you. But you understand that, in this, he doesn’t really have a choice. “I get it.”

He nods, seeming relieved. “But I, uh, I’ve been reading a lot. Like, a lot. So whenever you need a friend to talk literature with or bounce ideas off of, let me know.” He smiles again.

You can’t help but smile back. “Sounds great. Maybe we can have a two-person book club.”

He chuckles, sipping at his tea again.

You pick up your own mug and realize it’s empty. You suppose that this is as good a time as any to call it a day and head home; you have class in the morning, and a commitment to get to tonight on your way home.

“Well,” you sigh, glancing at the time, “I think…”

“Time to go?” he asks. He sounds a little disappointed.

You nod, your expression mirroring his. “I have errands to run. But…can I see you again?”

“Of course, bug,” he says. Like it’s not even a question. “Whenever you want.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” you tease. Then you gesture to his pocket. “Can I give you my number?”

He nods, digging it out of his pocket before tapping away at the screen. You recite your phone number for him, and you feel bright and content for the first time in a while as he promises to text you.

Before you leave, you wrap him up in a tight hug. “Missed you, Jay,” you whisper, squeezing him.

He squeezes you back. “You too, bug.”

And you turn and walk down the street, humming happily to yourself as you go.

Jason knows he shouldn’t follow you.

He knows this, and yet here he is, trailing after you up on rooftops, helmet in place and leather jacket pulled around his shoulders. You left the coffee shop smiling, seeming so happy, just because you got to see him.

“Can I see you again?” you asked hopefully, and all he could do was say “Of course,” because he couldn’t bear to disappoint you.

As he watched you walk away, a pep in your step as you turned to walk home, he groaned and rubbed a hand over his face with a sigh. Then he jogged to his car and grabbed his helmet, switching out his winter coat for his leather jacket before following after you.

And now he’s tailing you, watching you walk home, still bundled against the bitter cold of Gotham City winter.

You live in Cherry Hill, you told him when he asked. Made it out of Park Row now that you receive a stipend for grad school along with working your job at the public library.

In all respects, you’re a success story.

So why does Jason feel like there’s something you’re not telling him?

He hops from roof to roof, his footfalls silent as he watches you from above, watches you tuck yourself into your coat and hurry along the sidewalks. You look over your shoulder every few moments, and Jason’s heart aches to think that you haven’t grown out of your Park Row habits of always watching your back wherever you go.

But then he sees someone in a black hoodie emerge, and his body tenses.

The person, a tall, slim figure, heads straight towards you, and Jason’s hand goes to the holster on his hip, quickly freeing the gun. He doesn’t aim it, not yet, but he watches you closely to make sure this stranger doesn’t make any sudden moves.

The figure makes their way over to you, and you lift your face, and Jason can see from this distance that you’re not scared. In fact, you seem to be expecting this person, whoever they are. He squints, trying to see you more closely, to see what the hell you’re doing with a random stranger in the street–

And then two small baggies exchange hands, and it finally dawns on him. You’re making a drug deal.

He rocks back on his heels, stunned. Memories of watching his mother – or, the woman who raised him – do the exact same thing, buy from shady figures in the street and bring substances home to smoke or shoot up in their dingy old apartment in Park Row. He remembers the night when it all became too much and swallowed his mother whole, leaving her dead in that same apartment. Leaving her body for him to find. Leaving him to pick up the pieces.

And you know that.

You know what it was like for him to have to bury her. You know what it was like for him to go through watching her slowly kill herself, slowly drown herself, slowly take herself away from him. You know what it was like for him to turn to crime, because he was desperate, because it was all he had.

You know that, and yet here you are, going down the same path she did.

And Jason finds that he’s angry. He’s furious with you, furious that you would do something like this when you’ve seen the consequences, when you’ve seen what it does to the bystanders. Once again, he’s going to be collateral damage to somebody who only cares about themself, who only wants to numb the pain and doesn’t give a shit who it hurts.

So once the deal is complete, and your hands are tucked into your jacket pockets, hiding the little baggies there, Jason drops down onto the fire escape above you with silent feet. He calls out, voice modulated through his helmet, “You shouldn’t be doing that, you know.”

You just about jump out of your skin.

You whirl around on your heel, searching for the source of the voice, and when your eyes find him, massive and imposing on the fire escape, your eyes narrow.

You’ve never been one for heroes, if that’s how you view him; Jason knows this, just like you know better than to get high and start down a path you can’t help but drag others down.

You gesture towards him, towards the guns on his hips. “What?” you ask, grimacing up at him. “You gonna shoot me for buying some weed?”

Jason can’t hold back a scoff at the idea. There’s that nasty attitude he thought you’d grown out of. “It’s a slippery slope,” is all he says in return.

You scoff, shoving your hands deeper into your pockets, like you’re trying to hide away your sins. “A little weed never killed anybody,” you snap back. “Don’t you have a patrol in Park Row you’re late for?”

Jason’s jaw tightens; so you know of him, the Red Hood. You know his territory, that he’s the vigilante of your old neighborhood, watching out for those who can’t protect themselves.

He replies, “Maybe weed hasn’t. But what’s in that second baggy of yours?”

Your eyes dart away for just a moment. Just long enough for him to know he’s right.

He grabs the metal banister and leaps over it, dropping to the sidewalk beneath. Then he takes a step forward, then another, until he’s in front of you. No longer dressed in the thick winter coat he was when you went out for coffee and his face fully covered by his helmet, he’s not concerned about you recognizing him.

He puts his large hand in your coat pocket, feeling the heat of your body through the fabric, and grabs the two bags.

One is, indeed, a few grams of bud, already starting to stink through the bag. The second, though, is a white powder, something he’s familiar enough with. He hums, voice low and threatening as he raises his eyes back to yours. “Coke? That your poison of choice?”

You grit your teeth, hands balling into fists, but your voice is calm and even when you speak. “Sometimes. What’s it to you? I didn’t think you were involved in the War on Drugs.”

He scoffs again, tossing the baggies onto the sidewalk. They sink into the thin dusting of snow that covers the concrete. “Hey, if that’s what you’re into, far be it from me to judge. But maybe you should use that brain of yours before you end up in deeper shit, with track marks up and down your arms.”

You scowl at his words, but stand firmly planted in place. He has to hand it to you; you’re stubborn enough to keep your eyes on him, even while your precious drugs lay there on the ground.

He takes a step back, eyes on you. You still don’t move. Maybe you’re not as desperate for a fix as he thought. “What’s even the point?” he wonders aloud.

Your eyes narrow. “You don’t know what it’s like,” you say, “to need to escape. Clearly you don’t, or you wouldn’t be asking me that question.”

Jason glares at you through his mask; what do you know about needing to escape, compared to him? Sure, you grew up in Park Row, and you saw some shit, surely. But nothing you could go through could match what he has.

He thinks about how he buries himself in his work, in his violence. How he lets himself get hurt just for the pain, just for the subsequent mental numbness it brings.

Surely you have to know that someone like him, a monstrosity like him, has to numb the pain, too.

And so he takes another step back, shaking his head, like you’re a lost cause, because maybe you are. Maybe you’re not the little bug he used to know anymore; maybe the two of you have irrevocably changed and will never be able to meld back together like you once did. Like Dorian Gray, maybe you were hiding hedonistic acts behind a pretty face.

Not that he’s not hiding his own secrets and violence under the helmet.

“Make sure you know your sources,” is all he says next – he doesn’t let a single thought slip otherwise. “Don’t want to find a body littering Cherry Hill one day.”

And with that he’s gone.

You’re breathing heavy, shoulders heaving as you stare after his shadow disappearing into the early night that plagues the winter in Gotham. Your hands are shaking, though you’re not sure if it’s anger or fear or whatever else you’re feeling in this complicated tangle in your mind.

You crouch down and pick up your two baggies from where they lie on the ground, now covered in snow. You shake them off and wipe them on your coat before stuffing them back in your pocket, grumbling wordlessly to yourself as you turn and stomp your way towards your apartment.

You triple check the door is locked behind you. Old habits die hard.

Then, once you’re safely in your apartment, in your quiet environment away from the grunge of Gotham City – and away from the opinions of its overzealous inhabitants – you sink down onto the couch and toss your drugs onto the coffee table.

You sit and stare at them for a long moment, thinking.

Then you reach down and grab your swishers, and you start rolling.

It’s a mindless task, almost second nature now, with how often you’ve done it. It allows your mind to wander, to think about your day, your interaction with Jason and how much it meant to you.

How much you’ve missed him.

But it also brings back bad memories, memories of Park Row, of what he left behind when he disappeared. Memories of darkness swallowing you whole until you weren’t even sure you were human anymore.

And sometimes, maybe those thoughts continue to stick.

So once your first joint is tightly rolled, you light it up, resting it in your ashtray as you roll the rest for next time. Allowing yourself to sink into the false peace that the drugs start to pull you into, the temporary reprieve from the memories, the anxieties, the low thoughts that threaten to pull you under.

That’s something that Red Hood surely will never understand.

And then you think of Jason, and what he might think, if only he knew. Now, instead of just drowning out your memories, you’re drowning out your guilt, too.

thanks for reading! -luna xx link to ao3 | next

(taglist: @corpsedogs, @lulawantmula)

#dividers by cafekitsune #jason todd #jason todd x reader #batfam #dc batfam #batfamily #red hood #red hood x reader #red hood x you

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snezka-049 · 3 months ago

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Snezka and SCP-049 beginning (lore)

1. Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski lore (Snezka)

(Events before the containment breach).

In the corridors of the SCP Foundation, where secrets and anomalies are hidden from the public eye, Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski worked. Her life was full of mystery, and this is what drew her to the world of anomalies.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Name: Snezhana Lewandowski

Age: ██

Date of Birth: 27/08/ ████

Clearance Level: Third

Personnel Category: B

Specialty: IT Specialist. Psychologist.

Place of work: Zone 19

Foundation experience: 5 years

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Education

First: IT-Specialist.

Snezhana enrolled in the Faculty of Information Technology at a state university. During her studies, she specialized in cybersecurity and data analytics.

After graduating with a Bachelor's degree, then a Master's degree, she continued her education in graduate school, where she focused on research in the areas of:

1. Information Security.

2. Big data analytics.

She defended her doctoral dissertation on "Anomaly detection methods for system and big data", which attracted the attention of the SCP Foundation.

Second: Psychologist.

After achieving the success she needed in technical education, she decided to fulfill her life's main dream of working in the field of psychology. Due to some unpleasant events in her childhood, she did not have the opportunity to study in this field, so she had to temporarily change her orientation in life.

From an early age, Snezhana has shown an interest in psychology and human behavior. The motivation for this comes from a tough youth and personal traumatic experiences. Her goal was to help those who couldn't make it on their own, as she once couldn't. After enough time had passed, she managed to apply to the academy to study psychology. Upon graduating from the academy, Snezhana specialized in the areas of:

1. Clinical psychology.

2. Experimental psychology.

3. Counseling psychology.

After she got a job in a psychoneurological dispensary, gaining valuable experience and practice, a broader understanding of the inner world of people.

Invitation to the Foundation

Finding contacts and personal information about Snezhana was not difficult for the Foundation. Having noticed her abilities, the Foundation ordered to send a recruiter - ████ ██████ - into her social circle to get more information about the candidate. As a result, the recruiter ████ and Snezhana became close friends.

After some time of observation and communication of the recruiter with her, having received all the necessary information, the Board of the Foundation came to the decision to give her the invitation to work.

Realizing the risks and danger, Snezhana accepted the invitation, having resigned from her previous job after working for about 2 years.

After testing, interviewing and training, she became an employee of the Foundation with a level 2 security clearance.

Career at the Foundation

Snezhana started her career as a junior specialist in cybersecurity, a little later gaining a junior position in psychology.

Her specialization is a unique combination of programming and psychology, allowing her to look at anomalies from two perspectives: both as complex systems that require analysis, and as entities with their own consciousness and motivation.

Incident

While analyzing data, Dr. Lewandowski came across strange signals on the network. These were not just hacking attempts - they were coming from an entity known as SCP-███ She and others in the programming field developed a comprehensive defense strategy. In the process, they faced many challenges: the SCP-███ system was constantly adapting, and they had to find new solutions. Under conditions of stress and strain, Dr. Lewandowski managed to implement their real-time protection algorithm.

After that, for some reason, she was assigned more work in the field of psychology. Also, her success in the incident gave her a promotion to level 3 clearance.

In psychology

Dr. Lewandowski researches and analyzes object psychology. She develops methods of interacting with abnormal entities and helps in understanding their behavior.

Real security is achieved not only through physical barriers, but also through the emotional stability of employees. She took time to help her colleagues through seminars and psychology trainings for the staff of the Facility, trying to create an atmosphere of trust and mutual support among the employees.

For about 2 years, Dr. Lewandowski worked only with Safe Class facilities, and after being promoted to Senior Specialist in Psychology, she was ordered to work with Euclid Class facilities.

This promotion led her to meet one subject that changed her life, and in the future, his too... SCP-049 - Plague Doctor.

2. Lewandowski and SCP-049

(Events on the eve of the containment breach).

Experiment

The first days of Dr. Lewandowski and the SCP-049 subject were formal, protocol-driven. Lewandowski conducted standard interview sessions in an attempt to understand the motives and nature of his subject. The subject was cool and detached.

She knew SCP-049 was dangerous, but she saw him not only as an anomaly, but as a complex, multifaceted individual. His words were full of sadness and loneliness, imbued with longing and melancholy. She understood his logic, his pain, his desire to “help,” even if the methods were questionable, but perhaps all is not what it seems at first glance.

And yet she too had thought similar things to what SCP-049 had said, that the world was sick, humanity needed to be saved. Ever since she was a child, she had had thoughts like his in her mind.

She had a theory that there were no bad people in the world, but wounded people who had not been healed. She believed that a person becomes wounded, after being treated unfairly or cruelly, by similarly wounded people. If a person does not work on their wound, it will not heal, because there are many wounded people in the world that will scratch that wound, making it bigger. And this pain and resentment, like a virus or rot, infects his soul completely, making the person the same as the one who once inflicted the wound. Later that person carries this pain and resentment further, taking it out on others, making more infected. It is an endless cycle that cannot be eradicated completely, but can be minimized. Some can handle it, and some need help. You have to want help, you have to understand the situation and try to solve it too, because no one can help you better than you can help yourself, and that's what Snezka had to go through.

She thought these thoughts were strange, but after so many years, there was a creature that literally reflected her thoughts, with whom you can share this theory, and perhaps get understanding.

She saw herself in him, only a better version of herself, but with the same mental problems.

— How can that be!? He's just an abnormal object, why can't I stop thinking about him!? I can't stop thinking about him, his words. Maybe it's my soft nature, too compassionate, empathic, or maybe it's his anomalous action?

Dr. Lewandowski felt a kindred spirit in him and wanted to have more sessions with him, and most importantly, she wanted to get away from formal conversation, and share her thoughts with him about their common problem.

She decided to send a request to the management above about the idea of having experimental conversations with SCP-049, so that he would see Dr. Lewandowski as genuinely understanding, get comfortable with her, and tell her more about his treatment, himself, and the fever. Approval was granted, but it was a long wait. Finally she could be sincere with him.

Trust

New conversations with SCP-049, but not as formal as before, it took several such conversations before SCP-049 settled down with Dr. Lewandowski.

He told her more about the fever, about the treatment, they began to have deep dialogues about life and death, about philosophy, about society, SCP-049 even began to tell stories from his own life. Lewandowski also told him about her life, but she liked to listen to him more.

She found comfort in his monologues about the world, about death, about eternity, his stories about medicine. Her mind resisted, but her heart could no longer deny it: she felt something more than professional interest in him. It was a dangerous game, bordering on insanity. She knew it, but she couldn't stop. Lewandowski realized that her feelings were illogical, unacceptable, but they were there. Her greatest fear was that the Foundation would suspect something and restrict her access to him, which unfortunately happened...

Another conversation between SCP-049 and Lewandowski, the subject had already started addressing her by her favorite version of her name, Snezka, while she addressed him as Doctor. Suddenly the object fell silent.

— Doctor? Is everything all right?

— ...Yes. Snezka, let me demonstrate something to you, you should know....

The subject held out his hand, as far as it was possible being handcuffed for safety's sake, and nodded, offering to touch her. Sensing that this venture might not end well, Lewandowski extended her palm, and SCP-049 touched it.

— Wait, what...? Oh... My thoughts about your abilities were valid. - Was the last thing Snezka said before the cell door opened and she was summoned to leave.

Reprimand

— Dr. Lewandowski, your experimental conversations with the subject have come to an end. We have all the information we need, you will no longer have to work with SCP-049. Let's be honest, it seems you've begun to abuse your access to the facility, and the Foundation board has some questions about that.

— ...It was part of an experiment, you see.... It gave you a lot of new information, before such experiments such informative results were not observed. - said Lewandowski in her defense.

— Lucky for you that it didn't end in your death! Objects like 049 are dangerous, you can't trust them or reach out to them. Or have you forgotten what he did to Dr. Hamm? And everything was fine at first, too. This object is unpredictable! You're lucky you're a valued member of our staff, and this is the first time you've had an incident like this, otherwise we'd be forced to take action.

Separation

More work with other facilities has now fallen on her. One day, she dared to inquire about SCP-049. But she didn't get a clear answer.

Meanwhile, SCP-049 was asking the same question to the staff - when would Dr. Lewandowski visit?

— We're sorry, but Dr. Lewandowski has declined to work with you, SCP-049.

— ...That can't be true, you're lying! She couldn't have done it, I can feel it!

Subject SCP-049 became hostile to the Foundation, uncooperative and drove all attempts at contact away.

All or Nothing

— "Is the dream and freedom worth risking the lives and safety of others?" — Pondered by Dr. Lewandowski . — "Risking everything, insanity, selfishness(?). But if it's for a great purpose, for the good of all mankind..."

INCIDENT ██-████

(Latest walkie-talkie recordings)

(Static noise and warning signal sound)

Operator One: (Confused) This is operator one. Security protocol has failed! Repeat, security protocol has failed! All subjects... all subjects are at large!

Agent █: Reporting a security breach in Sector 3. Doors unresponsive, cameras disabled. Looks like SCP-███ is out of control.

Commander ███████: be careful! Confirm the presence of the intruder and take action to apprehend him.

(Noise, sound of gunshots)

Agent ██: (panic) This is crazy! Reporting SCP-███ is not alone. There are several other objects present. Very aggressive, we need help, repeat ████████████████ (interference).

Commander ████████: Come in, Agent ██, come in!!! (communication lost).

Commander ████████: Fuck...

Dr. █████: It could be SCP-███! He could have hacked into the security system and released the other facilities.

Commander ████: █████, are you sure? How?!

Dr. █████: I can't say for sure, but... (struggle noise) HOW ARE YOU!? STOP, DOCTOR... (interference).

Commander ████: All personnel to the assault! Stop the targets at all costs! What the hell's going on! Where's all the security personnel!?

(explosions, shouting)

Agent █████: They're all over the place

Agent ██: Where's the ██ squad?

Agent █████: they're holding back SCP-682

Agent ██: he's the last fucking thing we need!

SB-2: SB-1, this is SB-2! We've got-- we've got SCP-███breaking through! We can't stop him!

SB-1: Hold him off at all costs! Support is on the way.

(Siren and explosions)

Operator Three: SB-1, this is Operator Three! The ██ camera signal is gone! SCP-██��██... he's out!

SB-1: All SB personnel to camera ██! Isolate SCP-█████! Repeat, isolate SCP-█████! (radio interference)

End of Calm

There has been a massive failure of the entire Foundation security system in Area 19, as well as a power failure. Security protocol, alarms, and warnings went off with a delay with most of the dangerous objects wreaking havoc in the Foundation. The alleged culprit of the SCP-“”" incident. Likely had accomplices, an investigation is underway.

During the incident, a large number of soldiers and staff died. There was a leak of several objects to freedom. The lists of dead and missing were equal. Dr. Snezana Lewandowski and SCP-049 were also listed as missing, among dozens of personnel and facilities.

The SCP Foundation, having suffered loss and damage, is doing its best to restore order after the chaos, but the world is no longer safe as before.

3. Conversations between Lewandowski and SCP-049

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good afternoon, SCP-049. I am your psychologist, Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski. It's a pleasure to meet you!

SCP-049: Greetings, doctor, I hope we can work together.

Dr. Lewandowski: I think so! So, how are you feeling today?

SCP-049: (pause) I feel... A burden. A burden that is hard to describe in words. Every day I see suffering, and it depresses me.

Dr. Lewandowski: Are you talking about human suffering? About those whom you refer to as sick people?

SCP-049: Yes. The weathering is not just a physical condition. This world, this wretched piece of the universe, is forever doomed to suffer. (Irritated) Mortals, powerless over their own weaknesses, forever seek salvation in false doctrines and vain hopes. They build cities out of flimsy material, create weapons that can destroy themselves, and cling to life without realizing its true nature. I see their pain, their despair, feel their fear of the inevitable. And I know I can help them. But they don't understand. They fear me! They reject my mercy! They call me a monster, a monstrosity! I see them trying to stop me, lock me up, impose their rules. But can you limit what is beyond their comprehension? Can one defeat that which is eternal? Their attempts are futile. I will always exist. Let them resist, let them fear. It only confirms their blindness.

(A moment's silence)

Dr. Lewandowski: (Sigh)...Have you ever thought about why this “fever” bothers you so much? What exactly causes you to feel so strongly about it?

SCP-049: (sighs) I have witnessed a lot of suffering. I have seen people lose hope, I have seen them fall victim to their weakness. This makes me want to help, but sometimes I feel that my efforts are futile.

Dr. Lewandowski: Do you feel that your help is really effective? Or is there any doubt about your methods?

SCP-049: (with some irritation) My methods are the only way to free people from their suffering! I cannot afford to doubt my vocation. But sometimes... It catches up with me.

Dr. Lewandowski: It is normal to have doubts. Many people face similar feelings. What do you do to deal with these emotions?

SCP-049: I continue my work. I focus on my goals.

Dr. Lewandowski: Maybe you should take time to reflect on yourself and your feelings. It may help you better understand your motivation and calm your mind.

SCP-049: I don't think so, but... You may be right. I worry that if I stop, the darkness around me will consume everything.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Pause)...How I understand that. Sometimes you have to take a step back to see the big picture. It doesn't mean you stop fighting the disease. It can only make you stronger.

SCP-049: Perhaps...

Dr. Lewandowski: This is an important step. And remember, you are not alone in your experience. I'm here to help you make sense of it.

SCP-049: Thank you... I'll try to remember that.

[END RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good evening Doctor, how are you feeling?

SCP-049: It would be better if I were allowed to return to my work.

Dr. Lewandowski: Don't worry Doctor, you will definitely be given that opportunity...

SCP-049: Really? Really!? I'm finally going back to work, I'm glad to hear that! When do I get a patient?

Dr. Lewandowski: ...Unfortunately, I don't have that information.

SCP-049: Maybe you could influence this situation? Explain my urgent need to progress with my treatment!

Dr. Lewandowski: I don't think I can... Doctor, you need to rest, you've been working hard. As a doctor, you should know that rest is very important for high productivity.

SCP-049: (Sighs) I wish I had something to do in these four walls...

Dr. Lewandowski: I have a suggestion. Do you like to read? I can bring you some books if the Foundation leadership says so.

SCP-049: That's a very marvelous idea.

Dr. Lewandowski: What kind of literature do you prefer?

SCP-049: I was interested in modern books about medicine, it is interesting to study what is being written about it now. It would be interesting to read something from philosophy.

Dr. Lewandowski: Excellent choice Doctor, we have the same taste in literature. Would you mind if I brought a couple more books on my recommendation for you?

SCP-049: Sounds good, I agree.

Dr. Lewandowski: See you, Doctor.

SCP-049: See you, thank you for such an interesting proposal, Dr. Lewandowski.

[END OF RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good evening, Doctor.

SCP-049: Good evening, Dr. Lewandowski.

Dr. Lewandowski: I want to understand how you feel when you look at the world through the prism of your...your uniqueness.

SCP-049: (hesitantly) Uniqueness?

Dr. Lewandowski: I'm talking about wisdom. You have lived for centuries, watching the birth and decline of civilizations. What have you learned in that time?

(Minute's silence)

SCP-049: I've seen nations rise and fall, empires born of dust and turned to stone, ideas ignite people's hearts and turn to ash. (Pause). I realized that existence is a perpetual cycle of birth and death, a constant struggle for survival. People are so hungry for meaning, but it eludes them.

Dr. Lewandowski: Isn't this struggle, this longing for meaning, the very essence of being?

SCP-049: (With sadness in his voice) Meaning... (Pause) It wanders like a ghost through the labyrinths of our consciousness. We search for it in religion, in science, in art, but it eludes us, leaving only emptiness.

Dr. Lewandowski: But don't you see, Doctor? You create your own meaning by helping people to get rid of the disease. You believe in what you're doing, Doctor. You believe it's necessary.

SCP-049: Faith... (Pause) This is another one of those ghosts that haunt us. I see things that others do not see, and it pains me. It pains me to see the suffering that is inevitable for all living things.

Dr. Lewandowski: And you're trying to help, Doctor...

SCP-049: (Interrupting) We are but pawns in the hands of fate. Our actions are insignificant in comparison to eternity.

Dr. Lewandowski: Don't say that, Doctor. You are not a pawn. You are the creator of your own destiny. And I believe you will find your path, your meaning.

SCP-049: (Heavy sigh) But not in this place, not here, not now.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Pause) You know Doctor... I'd like to share with you a thought that has been on my mind since I was a child.

SCP-049: What is it that's bothering you?

[recording interrupted for 5 minutes]

Dr. Lewandowski: I almost forgot, the Foundation gave me permission to bring you some books.

(Took several books out of her bag and placed a stack on the table next to the subject)

SCP-049: (With joy in her voice) Glad to hear that! Immensely grateful to the Foundation and of course to you, Dr. Lewandowski.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Smiling) I'm glad it lifted your spirits. See you later, we'll be sure to discuss what we read next time.

SCP-049: I look forward to seeing you.

[END RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Zone 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Hello, Doctor! How are you today?

SCP-049: Good afternoon, Dr. Lewandowski. I'm feeling... quite well. I've been studying some of the books you brought me at the last meeting.

Dr. Lewandowski: Excellent! Which books did you enjoy the most?

SCP-049: I was impressed with the works on human nature. Their authors convey emotions and experiences in a very subtle way.

Dr. Lewandowski: Yes, literature can indeed be a great way to understand people. Is there anything that surprised you about these books?

SCP-049: I was surprised by how diverse human feelings are. Everyone experiences love, fear, and hope in their own way.

Dr. Lewandowski: Yes, humans are amazing creatures! What about you? Have you ever experienced something similar to love?

SCP-049: (Pause) I'm not sure. My life has been devoted to fighting the windfall, and I haven't given much thought to such feelings. But... sometimes I feel warm when I talk to you. (turns away)

Dr. Lewandowski: I'm glad to see your condition has improved markedly. I feel warm when we talk, too. (Pause) You are an unusually interesting conversationalist.

SCP-049: (surprised) Interesting? I've always thought of myself as rather... odd. But it's nice to hear you say that. You don't hear that very often in this place, in general... I've never heard it from you.

Dr. Lewandowski: Weird people can be very interesting! We all have our unique qualities. For example, your view of the world is something special, not strange. By the way, have you read that novel?

SCP-049: The Master and Margarita? Yes, an interesting work about the power of love and the struggle against darkness.

Dr. Lewandowski: I think there are so many layers and philosophical themes there. You know, you sound like the Master (Laughs).

SCP-049: Hmm... There's something, maybe, and you remind me of Marguerite.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Laughs) That's probably true. Unfortunately, I have to go. Don't forget, you deserve to be understood. And I'm here to help you do just that.

SCP-049: (With a slight sadness in his voice) Your support gives me strength.

Dr. Lewandowski: We all need each other's support.

SCP-049: I look forward to our future conversations.

[END OF RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good afternoon Doctor, I would like to know what your thoughts have been occupied with lately?

SCP-049: Greetings. (Pause) Relatively recently, I've been thinking about the nature of human cruelty.

Dr. Lewandowski: Cruelty... (Pause) Unfortunately, it permeates every facet of existence, like a shadow that follows the light.

SCP-049: Yes. (Sighs) I watch people, and it makes me sad how capable they are of terrible things. There is a darkness lurking in their hearts that sometimes overshadows even the brightest impulses.

Dr. Lewandowski: As it happens, humanity is a paradox. On the one hand, it creates beautiful works of art, science and culture, and on the other hand, it is capable of ruthless acts of violence and hatred.

SCP-049: Exactly. I see how people can be kind and compassionate, but at the same time they easily cross the line into becoming instruments of destruction. It causes me deep sadness and bewilderment.

Dr. Lewandowski: I share your feelings and support your thoughts, Doctor.

SCP-049: It is most gratifying to know that, Dr. Lewandowski. My mission is to rid mankind of disease. At times I am at a loss as to what to do about this inner cruelty? How do you heal a society that is tearing itself apart?

Dr. Lewandowski: You see, many of these atrocities come from fear, ignorance and hatred. Or perhaps they were mentally wounded once, and that wound, without proper treatment, began to fester, infecting the whole mind and soul.

SCP-049: (Interested) I like the way you think. Abuse is not just physical violence. It is also words that hurt, betrayals and indifference to the suffering of others. In each of these acts I see a reflection of the disease.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Sigh) Sadly, dreams of a world where humanity can overcome its cruelty and learn to love are utopian.

SCP-049: I'm not so sure about that. It's certainly not an easy task, the whole world and one me, the road to healing is long and thorny. But the more I work at it, the closer that peace comes.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Pause) Perhaps someday people will realize that cruelty is not part of their true nature. Perhaps they will learn to see in each other a reflection of themselves and learn to care for those who suffer. Perhaps... (Pause) But sometimes you get the idea that some people are so rotten in their souls that treatment will be useless, and the only thing left to do is to rid the world of that person so they don't hurt others. This is not humane, but in such a case it is possible to make sure that this person stays alive but is not capable of hurting others.

SCP-049: (Surprised) Your thoughts make sense. We've had a rather pleasant dialog. I've never had such an in-depth discussion with anyone else. I feel much better.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Smiling) That's wonderful, Doctor, I confess I don't often have someone to talk to about this either.

[END RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good afternoon, Doctor, how is your mood?

SCP-049: Greetings. My mood is a little down, without my work I'm having a hard time mentally.

Dr. Lewandowski: I'm sorry to hear that, Doctor. (Pause) Let me ask you something.

SCP-049: I'm listening to you.

Dr. Lewandowski: Do you have any pleasant memory from your life?

SCP-049: (Sighs) Unfortunately, there aren't many... (Pause) I do recall one. Yes, it was a time when I was out in the wild, searching for rare herbs and plants in the forest. No people and just the sounds of nature. And then I came to a field, a field of lavender. (Sighs) It's... It was a magical feeling. The field was filled with bright colors and the air was full of a light, slightly spicy aroma. I felt like I was in another world, away from my worries. I walked slowly among the flowers, watching the bees as they worked to gather nectar. The bees are not aware of the suffering that humans are experiencing, they are just doing their job, benefiting the world around them. It made me think: maybe that's what humanity needs - the simple pursuit of the good. (Pause) The whole day I was there. It was wonderful. I dream of being in that moment again one day.

Dr. Lewandowski: That's... It's a wonderful memory, very beautiful.

SCP-049: Yes... It's beautiful. You know, I feel a little better.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Smiling) That's wonderful to hear. Try to remember something else, good thoughts can smooth out your condition within these walls.

SCP-049: I'll try. Thank you for encouraging me to remember this.

[END RECORDING]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Interviewer: Dr. Snezhana Lewandowski, Area 19

Interviewee: SCP-049

[START RECORDING]

Dr. Lewandowski: Good afternoon Doctor, how is your mood?

SCP-049: Good afternoon Snezka. I guess my mood is somewhere between average and good. Good to see you, how are you feeling?

Dr. Lewandowski: I'm not bad. I have something I'd like to give you. I had a hard time getting permission for it from the foundation, but....

(Took out of her bag a small pillow with a lavender flower print pillowcase and placed it on the table in front of the subject).

This is for you. I remember that you don't need sleep, but that's not what it's for. Rather it is for coziness, and your favorable mood. This pillow is stuffed with lavender.

SCP-049: (Surprised) It's for me?! What a wonderful gift, lavender really calms me down.

Dr. Lewandowski: I'm glad the gift is useful to you. I would have brought you something else, but unfortunately the Foundation has only authorized this one so far.

SCP-049: I am honored by such attention, thank you, Dr..... Snezka. (Pause) ...How did I not notice that... Your last name is...

Dr. Lewandowski: (Interested) Hmm?

SCP-049: Lewandowski, that last name comes from the Old Polish word levanda, which means lavender. What a wonderful coincidence, my favorite plant.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Smiles) Yes, that's right, my favorite too by the way. I am amazed at your knowledge, Doctor!

SCP-049: It is a pleasure to be appreciated and understood by you. I must admit, you are not out of my mind.

Dr. Lewandowski: (Embarrassed) Oh... You know, it's mutual. Doctors aren't supposed to have favorites, but I have to admit...(Pause) You're my favorite patient.

(momentary silence)

SCP-049: I wish we could meet more often...

Dr. Lewandowski: I'd like that too, Doctor...

[END OF RECORDING]

Supplement

https://www.tumblr.com/snezka-049/766312832505626624/snezka-and-doctor-reference-and-lore-scp-049?source=share

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ghostiesnightmare · 5 months ago

Text

Welcome, I've been expecting you.

TW: noncon, dubcon, dark content ahead. dead dove do not eat. Requests: open! What I won't write on: pregnancy, scat, necrophilia. About the author

Ghostie's current masterlist:

One-Shots: Bound By Kindness - A raging blizzard brings an injured man to your doorstep. Against your better judgement, you decide to help him and show some compassion. But as the snow piles up, so does the tension, and you begin to wonder if your kindness was a terrible mistake. (12.4K words)

Graded on a Curve - All she wanted was an A, and all he wanted was obedience. When a professor with a sinister past takes an unhealthy interest in one of his brightest students, their academic games spiral into a destructive affair. The final lesson? Devotion isn't extra credit– it's required. (10.4K words)

Drabbles: Professor Albert Shaw The Price of Failure - A seven deadly sin drabble

One-Shots: Tricks and Treats - As Halloween approaches, so do ominous phone calls that leave you terrified in the night. Was it just a Halloween prankster, or was it someone with much darker intentions? (2.8K words)

Series: The House of Rules - Some houses are built on stone, others on secrets. There are consequences to your actions, you know that now. Blood on the stairs, secrets in the greenhouse, something festering beneath the floorboards. Still, you find yourself entranced by the very thing you swore to escape: Brahms Heelshire. Because what can you do when the man who destroyed you is also the only one who has ever saved you?

One-Shots: The Subject - As a graduate student writing your dissertation on the enigma of Michael Meyers, you try to prove his acts of violence fulfill a dark, psychological need- a crude substitute for intimacy. When Myers resurfaces, your academic obsession drives you dangerously close to the darkness you have been researching. The deeper you delve, the clearer it becomes that you aren't just studying the monster; you're caught in his gaze. (12.6K words)

Salvation - You were never supposed to survive him. You could have fled and buried the haunting memory of that fateful night– yet something draws you back to the ruins of faith and blood. Back to a place where your fear turns into something more like devotion. (8K words)

Drabbles: Cut by Mercy - A seven deadly sin drabble

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evidence-based-activism · 3 months ago

Note

are there any studies on why women stay with abusive partners or what's the best way to help them?

I know the common reasons of financial dependence, fear of social backlash or lack of support system, etc. but I was looking for something more comprehensive. I know someone irl who doesn't face this common barriers but is still not leaving or accepting help to leave.

Hello! Given the topic, I'm moving this ask to the top of my queue. Anon, I hope this helps you! I may be reviewing some information you already know, but I think it's important for others who may not be aware.

Women stay in abusive relationships for a myriad of interconnected factors. I'll start with some research reviews on this topic:

This 2023 review of 10 qualitative studies [1] found the most commonly cited reasons women gave for remaining in a violent relationship were: feeling pessimistic about new relationships, feeling the relationships still provided for their need for affection, having positive experiences in the relationship, being dependent (i.e., materially or emotionally) on the partner, still having a positive view of their partner, feeling trapped, feeling social pressure to remain in the relationship, believing the conflict is normal, and feeling dating violence is taboo among some other factors. Together this suggests women remain in these relationships either because they justify or minimize the abuse (positive experiences, fulfill affection needs, normal conflict, etc.) or because they feel unable to leave or find a better alternative (social pressure, dependence, pessimism about other relationships, etc.).

This 2021 review of 14 studies [2] found "investment in the relationship, commitment, and the existence of structural barriers (e.g., with no own income) were negatively correlated with the breakup." This suggests that, beyond material needs, the sunk cost fallacy [3] is playing a role. Essentially, the sunk cost fallacy is a common cognitive bias that makes us feel as though we must continue investing resources in something (like a relationship) because we already devoted so many resources to it. Women in a committed abusive relationship may find it difficult to leave simply because they have already invested so much time and effort into the relationship.

This 2013 review [4] supports this idea, arguing that "while personal and contextual reasons for remaining in a relationship are important, we argue that factors such as the commitment process may be the most difficult to overcome." This is essentially the same argument as above, but discusses other potential mechanisms behind this, like the "Foot-in-the-Door effect and cognitive dissonance."

This 2005 dissertation [5] includes a section on the reasons women gave for staying in the relationship, including material deficiencies (e.g., no personal income, no safe place to retreat to, etc.), cognitive distortions about themselves (e.g., feelings of guilt or shame, feeling they deserved the abuse, etc.), cognitive distortions about the violence (e.g., believing it was normal conflict, minimizing the impact of the abuse, etc.), and beliefs about other people (e.g., believing the abuser would eventually change, fearing their family's reactions, believing no one else would make them happy, etc.). They also note that themes in women's choice to leave included: the impact of the abuse on their children, a shift in their sense of self-efficacy, an escalation in violence, and their partner's infidelity.

This 2003 review [6] also indicates that both structural (i.e., material) factors and psychological factors (like the ones discussed above) play a role in women's decisions to stay. External resources appear to be particularly important (i.e., leaving is unlikely if she has no external resources even if she wants to leave), but after those are taken into account, psychological factors play a large role in their decisions to stay.

This 1998 review [7] describes the same types of factors. They also note that "many women have two conflicting emotions; they are tired of being afraid and wish to leave the relationship, but they also fear for their physical safety and that of their children if they try to leave their abusive partner." Unfortunately, this assessment is often accurate; continual harassment (sometimes through the legal system or their children) is common for women who have escaped an abusive relationship.

Some additional studies:

This 2015 study [8] analyzing social media posts found women's reasons for staying included themes of: distortions surrounding the violence (e.g., minimizing or rationalizing the abuse), low self-worth, fear of the abuser, a desire to save or help their partner, the presence of children, their family's expectations, and financial issues. In contrast, reasons for leaving included themes of: changed views on themselves or their relationships (e.g., realizing they deserved better or their partner would never change), receiving external support, feeling the need to protect their children, and fearing the escalation of violence.

This 2010 study [9] discusses types of beliefs about their relationships that are associated with leaving or staying. For example, they found conceptualizing the abuser with a "dual identity" (i.e., a good man who sometimes "turns into" a bad guy) was associated with staying, whereas believing being alone rather than in a bad relationship was associated with leaving. They have many other examples, but the essential point is that women are influenced not just by their circumstances but their beliefs surrounding those circumstances.

This 2006 longitudinal study [10] found seeking and not receiving outside help was associated with remaining in an abusive relationship.

This 2017 thesis [11] describes a "model ... for why women leave abusive relationships." The model steps “include gaining education to acknowledge red flags, awareness of the quality of alternatives, and realizing individual unhappiness.”

In other words, both material contextual factors like economic support and internal psychological factors help explain women's decisions to leave or stay with an abusive partner. Many of these psychological factors are based on common cognitive distortions. In other words, these factors are not unique to women in abusive relationships; instead, they are common among the general population. They should not be considered an explanation for why a woman is in an abusive relationship, but a partial explanation for why a woman may stay in an abusive relationship.

---

Now, what can someone do to help a woman in an abusive relationship? It's an unfortunate truth that you often have to wait for the woman to be ready to leave herself. In particular, if the reason she is staying is one or more of the psychological factors discussed above, you cannot change the way she thinks about her situation.

Anon, I know you mentioned this isn't relevant to you, but for others: on the other hand, if the woman is ready to leave but restricted by material factors, then you can help immensely by providing material assistance.

Making a clear and unqualified offer of material assistance, should she ever need it in the future, will also likely be invaluable for a woman who is not yet ready to leave. Her material resources will likely decrease the longer she is in the relationship. As such, this offer may become helpful to her in the future. It’s important that this offer is not conditional (i.e., does not require her to act in a specific way or timeframe).

So, what can you do for someone who isn't ready to leave? These suggestions are based on statements from various domestic violence organizations, which all have slightly different worldviews. For examples, see [12-14], but you can likely find similar resources from an organization with your preferred worldview. (Or the worldview of the woman in the relationship.) I am also drawing from the book "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft [15]. (Also, Anon, I am using the general "you" here.)

You cannot force someone to leave, nor should you try. One of the central components to an abusive relationship is the control the abuser exerts over their victim. The victim is left feeling helpless, like she has no control over her life or her choices. Helping her regain a feeling of control over her life is a vital component for helping her eventually escape the relationship. This cannot be achieved by forcing her to leave, persistently arguing, or confronting her abuser, as all of these deprive her of further control.

Offer and provide emotional support (e.g., listening to her feelings, commiserating with her complaints, and taking her side in arguments).

Use supportive language. Don't say anything that could convey blame or disbelief (e.g., "What did you do to provoke him?", "That doesn't sound like him?", etc.) or judgment about her choices (e.g., "I always told you I hated him.", "I told you so.", etc.)

Maintaining contact with the victim. Abusers try to isolate their victims, so maintaining steady contact even if she seems to "drift away" will help prevent him from managing to fully isolate her. This is also another reason to try and avoid direct conflict or arguments with either her or her abuser. Abusers are skilled at manipulating people's interpretations of events; a well-meaning argument from you about how she "has to leave or he'll hurt her" will turn into "she's trying to drive us apart because she hates that you're happy" (or some other twisted interpretation) which he’ll use to isolate her from you.

In a similar vein, abusers do not just manipulate their victims; they manipulate the people around them as well. Women often recount being characterized as dramatic, crazy, or even abusive by their abusers, and the people around them often believe the abuser because he acts "rational" (around them) while she seems to break down or blow up over "little things" (in response to a sequence of unobserved abuse). All of this is to say, never assume the abuser's rendition of events is accurate, even if you don’t understand her behavior. Further, make sure she knows you'll help her even if she does do something wrong. (An abuser can often convince his victim that she has done something wrong. Whether this is true or not is irrelevant at that point; what is important is ensuring she knows you will help her regardless.)

If she is amenable, help her create a safety or escape plan. If she is not, do your best to prepare some things for her. For example, making a "go bag" with clothes, toiletries, cash, and supplies for her children or pets if relevant; gathering information on the process for obtaining a legal help or non-profit resources in your area; having records of some helpful resources phone numbers and a prepaid phone; etc.

Don't confront her abuser. This will put both you and her into danger.

If you have reason to believe she is in imminent danger (i.e., at risk of death or serious injury at that specific moment) then you should call the police. Calling the police outside of such situations will not help. They are unlikely to help her improve the situation when there is not clear and immediate evidence of abuse that would lead to his incarceration (i.e., the imminent danger mentioned) and it can both anger the abuser (putting her in further danger) and threaten your continued relationship with her.

In summary, maintain a relationship with the victim, support the victim emotionally and – if possible – materially, and do not exacerbate the situation by provoking the abuser. Most importantly, while it is understandable for you to be desperate to help her, you must not try to control her decisions. You cannot make her leave; she must choose to do so herself. You can only support her in the meantime.

I hope this helps you, Anon! I hope the person you know is able to leave soon.

References under the cut:

Swasti, N. K. C., Swandi, N. L. I. D., & Wulanyani, N. M. S. (2023). Reasons for Women to Stay in Violent Dating Relationships: Literature Review. Sinergi International Journal of Psychology, 1(1), 46-56.

Murta, S. G., & Parada, P. D. O. (2021). Leaving violent intimate relationships: a literature review. Psicologia USP, 32, e200046.

Gould, Wendy Rose. “The Sunk Cost Fallacy: How It Affects Your Decisions.” Verywell Mind, 7 Feb. 2023, https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-sunk-cost-fallacy-7106851.

Dare, B., Guadagno, R., & Nicole Muscanell, M. A. (2013). Commitment: The key to women staying in abusive relationships. Journal of interpersonal relations, intergroup relations and identity, 6, 58-64.

Brandt, J. E. (2005). Why she left: The psychological, relational, and contextual variables that contribute to a woman's decision to leave an abusive relationship. City University of New York.

Anderson, D. K., & Saunders, D. G. (2003). Leaving an abusive partner: An empirical review of predictors, the process of leaving, and psychological well-being. Trauma, violence, & abuse, 4(2), 163-191.

Landenburger, K. M. (1998). The Dynamics of Leaving and Recovering from an Abusive Relationship. Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic & Neonatal Nursing, 27(6), 700–706. doi:10.1111/j.1552-6909.1998.tb02641.x

Cravens, J. D., Whiting, J. B., & Aamar, R. O. (2015). Why I stayed/left: An analysis of voices of intimate partner violence on social media. Contemporary Family Therapy, 37, 372-385.

Baly, A. R. (2010). Leaving abusive relationships: Constructions of self and situation by abused women. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 25(12), 2297-2315.

Koepsell, J. K., Kernic, M. A., & Holt, V. L. (2006). Factors that influence battered women to leave their abusive relationships. Violence and victims, 21(2), 131-147.

Hamilton, A. (2017). Understanding the experiences of women who stay in abusive relationships.

I’m worried about someone else. (2025). Women’s Aid. https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/the-survivors-handbook/im-worried-about-someone-else/

How you can help victims of domestic violence. (2025). Women’s Advocates. https://www.wadvocates.org/find-help/about-domestic-violence/how-you-can-help-victims-of-domestic-violence/

Drabinsky, H. (2020, July 28). How to help someone in an abusive relationship. Focus on the Family. https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/marriage-problems/how-to-help-someone-in-an-abusive-relationship/

Bancroft, L. (2003). Why does he do that?: Inside the minds of angry and controlling men. Penguin.

#feminism #male violence

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