#The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America

[lovemesomerafael]

The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America

Part 589

You can read all the parts of The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America on AO3. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the U.S., and may I suggest being thankful for Steve's ass and Bucky's abs? And Steve's biceps and Bucky's face? And Steve's chest and Bucky's thighs? And...

[s10127470]

The World of Marvels (Part 2)

Hey there guys!

I’m back with part 2 of my The World of Marvels series!

And with this part, we’ll finally be talking about some of the characters of this realm, starting off with….

Spider-Man (Peter Parker)

Characterization-wise, this Peter could be best described as a smart himbo.

He has all the kindness and attractiveness typically associated with himbos, but with an actual brain.

This version would particularly highlight two of Peter's strongest character traits: his caring nature and how down-to-earth he is.

Peter's best moments have usually come from being able to connect with people on a personal level.

Among the heroes of this realm, he's basically "the friend everybody likes".

I mean it's Spider-Man! Who doesn't like Spider-Man?

Nevermind....

As for his personal life.

Peter works part-time as a substitute teacher at various school for up-and-coming young superheroes, particularly Avengers Academy, The Future Foundation, and The Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters.

And he's HAPPILY MARRIED to Mary Jane.

As for his appearance.

Peter has fair skin, brown eyes, brown hair in the same style from Marvel Rivals....

Has a muscular build with a lean frame like in the comics, and stands at 5'9 (about an inch shorter than his traditional height of 5'10).

And he's 25 years old.

As for his outfit, you can't go wrong with the classic....

In terms of his powers and abilities, Peter has his traditional output.

However, the characters of this series will be a little more....showy.

As in they each have a special power or ability of sorts that they either canonically don't have in the comics (or at least mainline ones) or they canonically do, but rarely ever show off.

And in the case of Peter, he's back to utilizing constructs made out of webbing, like he did back during his early days.

Fun Fact: Peter loves kids.....and luckily, not in THAT way. He loves teaching them about things, helping them out with their issues, or just hanging out and playing with them. He's particularly close to Pinocchio, especially since he's had a history of being used by others, which Peter hates to see. As a result, his biggest opps (besides The Green Goblin and Doctor Octopus) are Honest John and Gideon, Stromboli, and especially The Coachman. If he even remotely sees the latter, he would enter his Black Suit attitude.

And well.....

Shocker: Coachman.

The Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic (Reed Richards), The Invisible Woman (Susan Storm-Richards), The Human Torch (Johnny Storm), and The Thing (Ben Grimm)

Characterization-wise, they're pretty the same as in the comics.

Though here, Reed would officially be confirmed as autistic.

Among the heroes of the realm, The Fantastic Four are among the most respected, given that they were the ones to kickstart the modern age of heroes.

As for their personal lives, they run The Future Foundation, an institution based within The Baxter Building, which is meant to help young, scientific minds flourish.

In terms of their romantic lives.

Reed and Sue are still married, and the proud parents of Franklin and Valeria.

Ben is also married to Alicia.

And Johnny is dating the Korean pop singer Luna Snow.

As for their appearances.

Reed, Sue and Johnny all have fair skin, while Ben has his trademark orange, rocky skin.

Reed has brown eyes, brown hair in his usual style with the curl at the front, a slender frame with an athletic build, stands at 6'3 (two inches taller than his usual height), and is 39 years old.

Sue has blue eyes, long wavy blonde hair, blue lips, an hourglass figure with an average build, stands at 5'8 (two inches taller than her usual height), and is 37 years old.

Johnny has blue eyes, spiky blonde hair, a lean frame with an athletic build, stands at his usual height of 5'10, and is 26 years old.

Ben has blue eyes, a large, wide and broad frame with a blocky build, stands at 7'1 (about a foot and a one inch taller than his height.....kind), and is 40 years old.

As for their outfits, it's essentially the same ones from the Marvel Adventures universe (which in the case of Reed, Sue and Johnny, were the same outfits they wore in the Ultimate Universe, but with black gloves and boots of their classic outfits.

As for their special skills in this series.

Reed can take on different forms, each with a different physical enhancement. Like an insanely muscle-bound form that grants him incredible strength or a big-footed form that grants him incredible speed.

Sue can create all kind of constructs out of her forcefields, including living ones of things like animals.

Johnny can also do the same thing, but with his flames.

And Ben can send out powerful shockwaves and waves of earth but stomping or slamming the ground.

Fun Fact: Once a month, the FF take their family and students out to a night at Cosmic Ray's Starlight Cafe in Cosmopolis.

Captain America (Steve Rogers)

Characterization-wise, Steve is what you would usually expect from him.

Among the heroes of the realm, he's by far the most respected, given that the stories of his heroic escapades from the past served as a inspiration to just about all of them.

As for his personal life, he works part-time as a freelance cartoonist and as the art teacher of Avengers Academy.

He's also now married to fellow Avenger Natasha Romanoff aka Black Widow.

As for his appearance.

Steve has fair skin, blue eyes, blonde hair in the same style from Avengers Assemble....

A broad frame with a muscular build, stands at 6'4 (two inches taller than usual), and is 37 years old.

As for his outfit, it's the classic suit, but with the shoulder star badges of his Ultimate outfit.

As for his special skill, it's pulled directly from the Ultimate Universe.

The Super Solider Serum, instead of giving Steve peak-human strength, it gave him superhuman strength.

He's around the same level as Peter.

Fun Fact: Growing up, Steve was always fascinated by American folk tales. So when he found out about The Land of Legends, he immediately went full-on fanboy, finally getting to meet the various folk heroes he read about when he was a kid.

The Incredible Hulk (Bruce Banner)

Characterization-wise, Bruce has finally gained control over The Hulk.

And even as The Hulk, he's pretty much how he's been portrayed in a lot of animated media since 2013.

Being more friendlier, levelheaded and intelligent than how he is in most other iterations.

Once again, largely thanks to Bruce finally having control over him.

As for his personal life, Bruce works as the chemistry teacher at Avengers Academy.

He's also now married to his longtime sweetheart, Betty.

As for his appearance.

As Bruce: Has fair skin, brown eyes, brown hair in the same style from Marvel Rivals.....

A skinny build, and stands at 5'3 (about six inches shorter than his usual height).

As Hulk: Has green skin, green eyes, messy dark green hair, a wide broad frame with an extremely muscular build, and stands at 8'6.

He's also about 35 years old.

As for his outfit......you can only do some much when you only wear purple pants.

As for his special skill.

As The Hulk, Bruce can generate and manipulate gamma energy.

Which he can either channel inward for even greater strength, or outward in the form of concussive beams.

Fun Fact: Bruce loves meditating, and one of his favorite realms to do so is Oriental Gardens. He usually mediates in either a clearing in a forest, or in a secluded garden.

Iron Man (Tony Stark)

Characterization-wise, Tony here, in contrast to.....just about every iteration of him since 2010, actually takes far more from how he was like in the comics pre-MCU.

Before Civil War ruined it.....

Still being charismatic and witty, but being more openly humble and caring.

As for his personal life, he's still the CEO of Stark Industries and serves as the technology teacher of Avengers Academy.

He's also now married to Pepper.

And before you ask, Jarvis isn't the AI within his suit anymore.

He's back to being his butler (a HUMAN butler mind you) and close longtime friend.

As for his appearance.

Tony has slightly tanned skin, brown eyes, long black hair and a Van Dyke beard, a lean build, stands at a 6'1 (6'4 in the armor, about two inches shorter than usual) and is 36 years old.

As for his outfit, it's the Model 29 Extremis Armor.

As for his special skill.

He has a special pulse cannon and a override mode that makes him even stronger for a brief amount of time.

Fun Fact: Tony has a special underwater suit with a steampunk theme to it. He got help from Captain Nemo when making it.

Thor (Donald Blake)

Characterization-wise, Thor is what you usually expect from him.

Also, as the heading above tells you, Thor is back to using the Donald Blake persona as his secret identity.

Which itself was still created by Odin after Thor was banished rather than Donald Blake already being an actual person who was……basically cursed.

As for his personal life, he still works as physician and serves as the history and mythology teacher of Avengers Academy.

He’s also now married to Jane.

As for his appearance.

As Donald: Has fair skin, blue eyes, short strawberry blonde hair, a stubble beard, slim build, and stands at 5’10.

As Thor: Has fair skin, blue eyes, long blonde hair, a broad frame with a muscular build, and stands at 7’0 (about six inches taller than he usually is).

As for his outfit, it’s the classic look.

As for his special skill.

Thor is able to tap into The Thorforce, a mystical force that allows him to control the powers of the storms without Mjolnir for a temporary amount of time.

Fun Fact: Visiting the realm of Astragard tends to be incredibly awkward for Thor, given the vikings and all. The dude can't go 30 seconds without getting praised and worshipped.

Ant-Man and The Wasp (Hank Pym and Janet Van Dyne-Pym)

Characterization-wise.....

Hank is dead-ass kind of a hippie.

Plus, just like his iteration from The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, he's a pacifist who usually tries to avoid violence.

As for Janet, she's pretty much the same as she was in EMH.

As for their personal lives.

Hank runs his own research company, Pym Laboratories, and serves as the biology teacher of Avengers Academy.

Janet runs her own fashion company, Van Dyne Design Studios, and serves as the fashion teacher of Avengers Academy.

And yes, these two are married.

But thankfully, these two will actually be in a HEALTHY and LOVING relationship with no sort of abuse.

As for their appearances.

Hank has fair skin, blue eyes, long dirty blonde hair that he often keeps in the form of a ponytail, a soul patch, a lean frame with a muscular build, stands at 5’5, and is 34 years old.

Janet has fair skin, brown skin, yellow and black lips, brown hair in a pixie cut, an hourglass figure with a muscular build, stands at 5’10, and is 32 years old.

As for their outfits.

Hank wears the same outfit from EMH, but without the trunks.

And Janet wears her iconic yellow and black suit, but with the same antenna muffs from EMH as well.

As for their special skills.

Thanks to their usage of the Pym Particles, both Hank and Janet possess superhuman strength, speed, agility and endurance in their normal sizes.

Hank can create physical constructs with his ants.

And Janet can use her muffs to control bees.

Fun Fact: Being inspired by Paul Bunyan, Hank and Janet have tried making giant meals. While although pretty good, they still don't quite compare to the ones Paul makes.

Well that's all for now!

Part 3 should be out pretty soon.

I didn't think Part 2 would take me this long to release though.

But anyway, let me know what you guys think about the portrayals I had in mind for these characters.

And specifically, the Fun Facts.

I did those to kinda show off how the heroes interact with the other realms of The Magic Kingdom.

[authorjielin]

Sneak peek time!

Once America’s Monster and A Woman in a Man’s Clothing wrap up (we’re so close to the end!), here’s what’s coming next:

Sienna Collins is a mountain lion shifter, silently protecting a small mountain town that doesn’t even know she exists.

Whispers and legends speak of a great cougar watching over the town — a guardian spirit, fierce and unseen. Helen is content with her quiet life, patrolling her territory and keeping to the shadows. But everything changes when a bear shifter crosses into her land. John Price doesn’t seem interested in taking over, but ever since he laid eyes on her, he’s been sticking around, flashing those infuriatingly sweet smiles.

Too bad she’s going to need his help — because a pack of male coyote shifters has just entered her territory, and they’re not here to play nice.

Features: Shapeshifting · Small-town secrets · Slow-burn tension · One dangerously sexy, irresistibly rugged bear daddy Price who is utterly addicted—not just to Sienna’s incredible cooking, but to every glance, every touch, every moment with her 👀 · plus loads of sizzling sexual tension and scorching spicy scenes 🌶️.

Eleanor Carter is a bestselling adventure novelist — or at least she used to be.

Lately, she’s run out of ideas, and critics have been tearing her apart for the “utter lack of realism” in her stories. So, for the sake of research (and her reputation), she heads straight to the sticky, sweltering jungles of Sudhara — a land of venomous creatures, relentless mosquitoes, and humidity thick enough to drown in. Halfway through being eaten alive, Eleanor seriously wonders why she didn’t choose to write romance novels instead. Things only get worse when her arrival sparks suspicion, and she’s mistaken for a smuggler. To clear her name — and stay alive — she ends up hiring Mr. Adler, a snarky, reluctant survivalist who wants absolutely nothing to do with her…

Except she’s paying him. So… why not?

Features: Classic ‘90s adventure romance vibes ✨ · Comedy · Enemies to Lovers 💥 · A snarky, jungle-worn, painfully attractive Vietnam-era Russell Adler who absolutely has no time for loud, whiny tourists.

Myra Harper works under KorTac as the captain of her own task force — tough, respected, and unyielding.

But when Colonel König and his team show up to complicate her mission, she finds herself dealing not only with obstacles but also with a man who is arrogant, and openly mocks her, doubting her abilities. Then comes the news: both her team and König’s are assigned to a high-stakes rescue mission. Things quickly spiral out of control when they are captured and thrown into a bunker as prisoners. Though compelled to work together to stay alive, Myra and Konig clash at every turn, their mutual disdain as fierce as the peril that surrounds them.

What follows is a brutal, passion-fueled battle of endurance — a test of willpower and desire to see who will break first. König calls himself a king, but Myra will never kneel to him.

Features: Close proximity · Embarrassing, tension-filled situations · Enemies-to-lovers · And a Konig with the ego of a king 👑 — as it should be. (I’m tired of seeing him portrayed as a scared, shy man; he’s now a colonel who can crush skulls with one hand. Show him some respect!)

Ghost has been captured by Makarov, sacrificing his freedom to protect Task Force 141.

Despite enduring hours upon hours—days upon days—of relentless torture, he refuses to break. No matter what they do to him, he won’t reveal the location of his teammates. Frustrated by Ghost’s unwavering silence, Makarov calls in his trump card: his niece. Natalya Belova, also known as the "Succubus". A master of psychological and sexual torment, she specializes in a dark art designed to shatter a man’s self-control, driving him to the brink of madness. Her methods are cruel, intimate, and devastating—meant to force even the strongest to beg for mercy… or release.

Will Ghost endure? Or will even he fall under the weight of temptation and pain?

Features: Touch-starved Ghost — still as gruff and stoic as ever — plus lots and lots of sexual tension and extra spicy scenes 🌶️🔥

This is a one-shot smut, currently in development.

[themculibrary]

Bucky/Clint Road Trip Fics Masterlist

Americana is for Lovers (ao3) - ccbytheseashore M, 8k

Summary: Please tell me you are still alive, read Steve's text.

In Virginia, Bucky replied.

The hell are you doing in Virginia?

Would you believe me if I said trying to find a foam sculpture of Stonehenge?

Tony said to make sure his car comes back in once piece. Please don't shoot each other.

Clint and Bucky set off on an adventure to find an infamous work of Americana history, but find literally everything else (including love) instead.

Aw, Blood, No (ao3) - Reremouse (TheBelfry) M, 19k

Summary: Being turned into a vampire was never part of Clint “Mr. Actual Ray of Human Sunshine (sometimes)” Barton’s life plan. But they say life is what happens while you’re making other plans, and when an Avengers mission to take out a Hydra base goes disastrously wrong, Clint comes out of the fray undead.

Unfortunately for Clint, SHIELD has guidelines to deal with agents who have been turned into vampires: bring them in, or take them out. Fortunately, Bucky is both well-versed in vampires (Hydra—what are you going to do?) and evading SHIELD. Fortunately, Bucky is both well-versed in vampires (Hydra—what are you going to do?) and evading SHIELD.

And sometimes “I’m your hostage. Get moving,” is the way Bucky says “I love you.”

blank passivity (i'm hiding my shit-eating grin) (ao3) - WHYISEVERYNAMETAKEN T, 21k

Summary: Upon being handed a mission that includes a tiny car, a cross-country roadtrip, and also, oh yeah, the Winter Soldier, Clint can honestly say that he's not having a great time. Adding in the fact that Barnes doesn't even want to talk to him has Clint preparing himself for the longest drive of his life.

(Clint is also pretty sure that Captain America hates him, but that's neither here nor there.)

OR

If I had a nickel for every time [Bucky took a picture with a beaver], I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice -Dr. Doofenshmirtz

crying wolf out to the moon (ao3) - shatteredhourglass T, 3k

Summary: Clint decides it's a good idea to drag Bucky on a road trip on the day of the full moon. Bucky's too weak for Clint to deny him anything, even if it is in fact, a goddamn terrible idea.

drive ‘n whine (ao3) - hawksonfire G, 1k

Summary: Bucky’s been stuck in the Tower for too long, so Clint does something about it.

Liminal Spaces (ao3) - thepartyresponsible M, 20k

Summary: “Clint,” Steve says, and it’s that same no-bullshit, do-or-die, I really, really mean it voice he used to trot out in the last few innings of close games in high school. “Bucky’s not gonna fly. He’s not going to drive himself. He can’t— I need you to drive him here.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Clint says, and hangs up.

Runaways (ao3) - madetobeworthy G, 1k

Summary: Sometimes Bucky needs to be gone, and sometimes Clint goes with him. They don't need to speak, just listen to the radio as the car devours the miles ahead of them.

see the stars come out of the sky (ao3) - veryrach M, 11k

Summary: “Arrested, yeah, I remember. How the hell do you have ten grand in cash - no, you know what, don’t tell me, forget I asked,” Clint says resignedly. “So let me get this straight. You want me to drive all the way out to Niagara Falls, pick up what I’m sure is a totally legit random bag of cash from somewhere, use it to bail you out, and drive all the way back.”

In which Bucky helps Clint help Barney. There’s a road trip, slightly inept fumbling of the emotional and physical varieties, and a bit with a dog.

the search for clint (ao3) - pherryt G, 2k

Summary: It’s a long road Bucky’s on, and he can only hope Clint is at the end of it.

The Start of Something (ao3) - kookykoi T, 1k

Summary: Bucky had the bright idea of going on a road trip. Clint had the brighter idea of going with him.

worse than a motel 6 (ao3) - spiralsystem T, 7k

Summary: Nat and Clint are assigned to take down the remaining Hydra bases on the outskirts of civilization, the ones that the others clearly don’t have time for. Oh well, road trip for Clint! Until Nat, Clint, and the one person Clint Really wanted to avoid, run into each other at the shadiest motel Clint has ever seen.

you’re my best friend (ao3) - pherryt G, 9k

Summary: Clint and Bucky need to go on a road trip to get to their next mission which Clint figures is the best way to get to know Bucky even better. It goes better than planned!

[guessthatrec-poll]

Final Media List and Guess Stats

The Guess That Rec tournament is over, and all submissions have been revealed! Below is a full list of all the media that was in this tournament, and some fun statistics on guesses.

Revealed Media List:

Star Trek

Goethe's Theory of Colors

Les Miserables

Jurassic Park

Kindred by Octavia Butler

Mystery Science Theater 3000

Hamlet

House MD

Riverdale (2017-2023)

Dracula

The MCU Captain America movies

Voltron Legendary Defender

Skibidi Toilet

Love Never Dies

Red vs. Blue

The Simpsons

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

A Song of Ice and Fire

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

Justine, or the Misfortunes of Virtue, by the Marquis de Sade

Halo

Wings of Fire by Tui T. Sutherland

Trials and Trebuchets

Dream SMP (2020)

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure part 3: Stardust Crusaders

The Magic Tree House

WOE.BEGONE

Doubt

Manner of Death (2020)

Hannibal

Huckleberry Finn

Stephen Sondheim’s Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Word of Honor (2021)

Velocipastor (2017)

The Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien

ARMS for Nintendo Switch

Tokyo Ghoul (2011)

The Silmarillion

Utsukushii Kare (My Beautiful Man)

Dog Sees God: Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead

The New Testament of the Bible

My Adventures with Superman

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight

Caged Again (2024)

Earthlings, Sayata Muraka

You (2018-present)

Umineko When They Cry

The All for the Game series, by Nora Sakavik

A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion

Phantom of the Opera 1986-2023

Discours sur le Colonialisme

Cats the Musical

No Exit by Jean-Paul Sartre

Five Nights at Freddy's

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War

Akiba Maid War (2022)

Dead Friend Forever (2023)

The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals

Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's

Mulholland Drive

Jane Eyre

Homestuck

Guess Highlights:

Most correctly guessed rec: rec #41 (the New Testament, with 21 correct guesses), followed by rec #3 (Les Miserables, 15 correct guesses) and rec #26 (The Magic Tree House, 14 correct guesses)

Most incorrectly guessed rec: rec #15 (Red vs. Blue, with 7 incorrect guesses), followed by rec #2 (Goethe's Theory of Colors), rec #32 (Sweeney Todd), rec #40 (Dog Sees God), rec #47 (Umineko When They Cry), and rec #49 (A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court), all with 6 incorrect guesses

Most incorrect guesses for the same media for one rec: rec #2 (Goethe's Theory of Colors, guessed as Homestuck 4 times)

Most even correct-incorrect guess ratio: rec #17 (The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, 4 correct guesses and 4 incorrect), rec #49 (A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, 6 correct guesses and 6 incorrect)

Most incorrectly guessed media: Homestuck (9 incorrect guesses for 6 recs), Dr. Who (5 incorrect guesses for 4 recs), Golden Kamuy (4 incorrect guesses for 4 recs), and Star Wars (4 incorrect guesses for 3 recs)

[guybracha]

Justice League - The Spec Age

A fan idea that i came up with: retelling the silver age adventures of the justice league of america, but with a new ideas and members.

alongside the original seven (superman, batman, Wonder Woman, The Flash, Green Lantern, Aquaman, and Martian Manhunter), we can also find in the league:

green arrow, black canary, the atom, Hawkman and Hawkwoman, Captain Comet, shazam, elongated man, alloy (of the metal men), Zatanna, Red Tornado, Robin (before he went to found the Teen Titans), dr. fate, Mr. Terrific, Orion, Stargirl and s.t.r.i.p.e., Blue Beetle, Captain Atom, vixen, supergirl, and a few legion members who got stuck in our present: cosmic boy, Saturn girl, dream girl, mon-el, and chameleon boy.

[fany-the-bunny]

Oh! You want 50 simpathetic villains? Fuck it! I'll give you 60!

1. Darth Vader (Star Wars)

2. Petey the Cat (Dogman)

3. King Dedede (Kirby)

4. Pain (Naruto)

5. Konan (Naruto)

6. Madara (Naruto)

7. Choso (Jujutsu Kaizen)

8. Toji Fushiguro (Jujutsu Kaizen)

9. Suguru Geto (Jujutsu Kaizen)

10. Ice King (Adventure Time)

11. Magneto (X-Men)

12. Wile E. Coyote (Looney Tunes)

13. N (pokémon)

14. Guzma (Pokémon)

15. Taranza (Kirby)

16. Harry Osborn (Spiderman)

17. Mr. Freeze (Batman Animated Series)

18. Baby Doll (Batman Animated Series)

19. Calendar Girl (Batman Animated Series)

20. Joker (Joker 2019)

21. Harley Queen (DC)

22. Clay Puppington (Moral Orel)

23. Loki (Marvel)

24. Bucky Barnes (Captain America)

25. Spinel (Steven Universe)

26. Candyman (Candyman)

27. Jason Vorhees (Friday the 13th)

28. Doey the Doughman (Poppy Playtime)

29. Killmonger (Black Panther)

30. Doctor Octopus (Spiderman)

31. Severus Snape (Harry Potter)

32. Draco Malfoy (Harry Potter)

33. Frankenstein monster (Frankenstein)

34. Red (Us)

35. Carrie (Carrie)

36. Cujo (Cujo)

37. Pamela Vorhees (Friday the 13th)

38. Bowser Jr. (Super Mario)

39. Shere Khan (Book of the Jungle)

40. Darth Maul (Star Wars)

41. Lusamine (Pokemon)

42. Catnap (Poppy Playtime)

43. Dogday (Poppy Playtime)

44. Mommy Long Legs (Poppy Playtime)

45. Nightmare Moon/Luna (My Little Pony)

46. Bojack Horseman (Bojack Horseman)

47. Beatrice Horseman (Bojack Horseman)

48. Jennifer Check (Jennifer's Body)

49. Bartholomew Kuma (One Piece)

50. Tai Lung (Kung Fu Panda)

51. Charlotte Katakuri (One Piece)

52. Dr. Phosphorus (Creature Commando

53. Trilla Suduri (Star Wars)

54. Starro (Suicide Squad)

55. Polyphemus (Epic/ Odyssey)

56. Cragger (Legends of Chima)

57. The Collector (The Owl House)

58. Azula (Avatar)

59. Sindel (Mortal Kombat)

60. Lord Garmadon (Ninjago)

[kenandeliza]

More movie Billy Baston/ Freddy Freeman and Golden Age Comic Billy Batson/ Freddy Freeman shenanigans

Golden Age Comic is shortened to GAC

Sequel to this dialogue comic:

———

“Interesting adventures”

(post shazam 2 movie, GAC characters are in the 1970s instead of the 1940s)

GAC Freddy: “it’s been a while since we met, so what’s sort of adventures do you have over at your world? “

Movie Billy: “Oh man it was so cool, We explore the doors at the rock of eternity, some of them lead to zombie apocalypses and others fantasy lands, we met Super-man, met Wonder-woman and I’m an official member of the Justice Society of America! “

Movie Billy: “oh and Freddy has a Goddess for a girlfriend now.”

Movie Freddy: “HEY! i’m supposed to tell them! “

GAC Billy: “Congratulations Freddy! We also had some adventures too! Speaking of Superman, I fought Lex Luthor when he teamed up with Mr Mind! Although I wondered how Mr Mind managed to bring a comic book Villain to life.. then I fought superman, Mary fought supergirl before we worked together…still couldn’t wrap the fact that I fought Comic Book Characters..”

Movie Billy: “Hold on. ‘Comic book characters’!? Don’t you have a superman in this world!? “

Billy: “He’s a comic book character in here, don’t know if he’s a real person in your dimension, so is this wonder woman.”

Movie Freddy: “huh..that’s interesting.. “

GAC Freddy: “As for me..Nothing much interesting happened for me, this week alone I was just selling newspapers peacefully!”

GAC Billy chuckles: “yeah..nothing much happened except for getting Captain Marvel Jr in the electric chair for the 5th time now..”

Movie Billy and Freddy: “Excuse me!?”

GAC Freddy: “Don’t ask me how I got accused of murder and getting the death penalty for the 5th time, it happened more than once in the 40s, i’m still trying to figure it out myself..”

GAC Freddy laughs awkwardly

Movie Billy: “ you’re telling me that this Fawcett City with its Talking Tigers, Mystical fairytale creatures, AND A SUPER-POWERED PINK BUNNY, HAS A DEATH PENALTY!?”

GAC Billy: “well yeah..?”

Movie Billy: “AND GOTHAM CITY DOESN’T HAVE ONE!?”

Movie Freddy: “to be fair the executing a clinically insane person is unconstitutional. Most of Batman’s rogues are mentally ill. As they were captured extrajudicially, they were not properly mirandized. This is why they go to a psychiatric facility, and not a prison.”

Movie Billy:”…fair..”

——-

“Brother”

GAC Billy: “I think aside from that, We met Freddy’s long lost Brother!”

Movie Freddy: “Brother?”

Kid Eternity popped up behind movie Freddy: “you called?”

Movie Freddy was startled: “GAH!”

Kid Eternity:” Wow you’re more sensitive than my Freddy”

GAC Freddy: “Kit, you can’t just randomly pop up behind people and expect them to stay calm!”

Kid Eternity:”sheesh party pooper, also, hello!”

Kit waves at movie Freddy and Billy, ��name’s Christopher Freeman, but you can call me kit”

Movie Freddy and Billy waved at him, not sure what to think.

Movie Freddy whispering to Billy:” does this mean that I have a brother like him?”

Movie Billy:” Who knows, maybe not in our universe..”

GAC Freddy: “Freddy, He reread the books you gave me more than I read them myself”

Kid eternity: “yep! I like the Mangos you brought to my brother he last time you two met, although they were pretty weird reading from right to left..”

Movie Billy: “you mean mangas?”

Kit snapped his finger:” yeah those! Do you have more of them? I finished the ones you gave to my Freddy!”

Movie Freddy fist bumps the air:” Finally! Someone who I can introduce JoJo!”

Movie Billy: “Freddy no-“

Movie Freddy dragging Kid eternity to his manga collection:”YES YES YES YES”

GAC Billy: “is that a reference I’m supposed to get?”

Movie Billy:”Trust me, be grateful you don’t get the reference..”

————

“STAND”

Movie Freddy:” So..what are your powers? Are they similar to the ones captain marvel and jr have?”

Kid eternity:” Nope! Technically I’m a ghost who can summon any fictional and Historical characters!”

Kit demonstrated his power and summoned sherlock

Movie Freddy:” wait.. you’re basically an overpowered stand user!”

Movie Billy:”No he isn’t”

Movie Freddy:” well yeah he is-“

Movie Billy:”not everything is a JoJo reference!”

——

That’s all of them i could think up for now, hope you like them :D!

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (25-31 May 2025)

the audacity of this show's creatives! 😂

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

😊 say it soft and it's almost like praying (Somanywords) - 43K, Steve POV post-WS fic where both of them are complete messes but manage to figure it out. solid writing, very enjoyable

🥰 The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America - Chapters 1-230 (LoveMeSomeRafael) - absolutely hilarious more-or-less frame-by-frame comic style 'retelling' of all the captain america movies. a tour de force of fanwork and so fucking hysterical. 1-230 covers captain america: the first avenger.

completed my Murderbot Diaries reread! (Martha Wells, author; Kevin R Free, narrator)

😍 Rogue Protocol (The Murderbot Diaries #3)

😍 Exit Strategy (The Murderbot Diaries #4)

😍 Fugitive Telemetry (The Murderbot Diaries #6) - on my rereads, I always read in chronological, not publication, order

😍 Network Effect (The Murderbot Diaries #5)

😍 System Collapse (The Murderbot Diaries #7)

💖💖 +43K of shorter fic 💖💖

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

THE GREAT DEBATE - Most Upsetting Children’s Toy to Become Sentient? [with Matt Mercer, Damien Haas, & Ify Nwadiwe]

Smartypants - s2, e7

Adventuring Academy - "All Games Are Beautiful (with Erika Ishii)" (s6, e2)

The Brokenwood Mysteries - s11, e6

Ask Hank Anything - How Does Weed Affect My Brain? (Akilah Hughes)

Murderbot - s1, e4

Poker Face - s2, e3-5

Parlor Room - s1, e4

D20: Neverafter - "The Curdled Web" (s16, e6)

D20: Adventuring Party - "The Fable of the Frog and the Scorpion" (s11, e6)

D20: Neverafter - "Trouble in Tuffeton" (s16, e7)

D20: Adventuring Party - "The Nat Honey (AKA the A-crit-stant)" (s11, e7)

Leverage: Redemption - s3, e9

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

Pop Culture Happy Hour - The Last Of Us

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Lilo & Stitch

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Why Is There a Dinosaur Here?

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Museum of Friends

99% Invisible - Build, Interrupted: A Conversation with Ezra Klein

No One Saw It Coming - Absinthe was Framed for Murder

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Karate Kid: Legends And What's Making Us Happy

Ologies - Urocyonology (LITTLE GRAY FOXES) with Bill Leikam

Shedunnit - An Inspector Calls

The Allusionist - 209. Four Letter Words: Serving CUNT

Normal Gossip - A United Nations of Red Flags with Sam Sanders

Vibe Check - I Am the Fish Delish featuring Tim Miller

Hit Parade - The Bridge: Isn’t It Iconic?

Answer Me This! - AMT406: Slicing Socks, Polyglot Popes and Stealing Butter

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Little Lambs, Big Back Story

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

"Rio" [Duran Duran] radio

"Knee Deep" [Zac Brown Band feat Jimmy Buffett] radio

REO Speedwagon radio

Ultimate Happy Songs

Jimmy Buffett

[doctorhelena]

Hi @theawkwardterrier!

I’m your @steggyfanevents Steggy Secret Santa this year, and in true Steggy fashion (and in my own personal tradition for the past few years), I'm late. 😂😩

The good news is that I have a fully completed draft of a story I think you'll enjoy, and editing is progressing well! The bad news is that it's quite a bit longer than I'd intended (I really thought I’d come up with a short, self-contained idea this year! 😭) so editing is taking a little longer than I’d hoped, and even with the extension I'm not quite going to make it. But I really, really hope I’ll have it for you very soon!

In the meantime, please accept this short preview excerpt.

Context: Post-Endgame Steve has received a short and uninformative "I need an emergency lift ASAP" phone call from Peggy (who didn't kiss him hello when she got in the car because the lipstick she's wearing would make that a bad idea.)

-------

The lipstick was another thing he wasn’t exactly jealous about. Peggy had been a spy long before Steve had met her, and he’d always known that, thanks to the Sweet Dreams knockout lipstick Howard had made for her, kissing unsavory individuals was sometimes the most efficient way to do her job. And he understood that there was a difference, for her, between kissing for personal and professional reasons. Still, he didn’t particularly like to think about it actually happening, and Peggy always looked a little guilty, and then annoyed at herself for feeling guilty, whenever the topic came up. 

To top it all off, Howard, unprompted, had recently developed two further prototypes: Forget Me Not, making the recipient of a kiss forget everything that had happened in the past half day, and Always Be True, containing a truth serum that lasted for about five to six hours, at Howard’s best guess.

“At your best guess?” Steve had asked him when he’d brought it over. Howard had shrugged unrepentantly. “I’ll have a better idea after Peg gathers some data from the field.” He’d proceeded to cheerfully ignore Steve’s patented Captain America look of reproach, while Mr. Jarvis had simply shaken his head wearily in the background.

Peggy, too, had regarded the new lipsticks with a healthy dose of suspicion - and Steve, having heard the story of her adventures with Howard’s ‘Bad Babies’, understood why. But the fact was that Howard was generally pretty reliable once he’d declared an invention ready for action, and Steve knew that Peggy now kept all three in her bag along with her regular lipstick, having had Howard mark the different tubes with a series of notches and grooves so that she could easily tell them apart by feel. 

“What happened?” he asked her now, as he slowed the car to a stop and waited for a truck to pass on the cross street. It was snowing a bit harder now, and he could afford to drive more cautiously now that he knew Peggy was safe.

“Howard Stark,” Peggy said with great exasperation. “I’ve ruined my chances at getting vital information from the arrogant ass I’ve been unpleasantly cultivating for weeks now, because Howard Stark is a bloody idiot.”

[lovemesomerafael]

The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America

Part 590

The great thing about the internet is that you can read all the parts of The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America on AO3. Forget all the useful information and communication with loved ones, the ease and convenience. That's not why God invented this shit. It's all about the stupid fan comics, man.

[lovedeathalice]

This has me dying I love these😭

From The Adventures of Captain and Mr. America

[thetribunaloftheimagination]

WIZARD OF SNARK REVIEWS- "The Electric State"

Hey, I'm back in the saddle! Been a minute since I did one of these... until I can once again get a decent AV setup, this'll have to do. In the meantime, please consider tossing a coin to your Wizard. https://www.patreon.com/guardiansofwhimsy What do you get when you hand The Russo Brothers, the fellas who've been keeping the Marvel Cinematic Universe humming for years (SHUT UP, THE MCU IS NOT COOKED, GO OUTSIDE AND TOUCH GRASS) a novel by Simon Stalenhag about an alternate 1990's that experienced a Robot Uprising where humanity is rotting on the vine thanks to addiction to VR-technology? You get "The Electric State," the latest Netflix original film and a fun, thought-provoking romp through an interesting blend of "Fallout," "WALL-E," "Ready Player One," "The Lawnmower Man" and a hefty "Screw You" to Silicon Valley tech-bubble douchebags deluded into thinking they're transhumanist god-kings! In an alternate-timeline 1990's that diverges from our world around 1955, in which Walt Disney created robotics-technology to promote his theme-park that eventually went sapient and started demanding equal treatment under the law until a war between Man and Machine was won by a tech-billionaire's VR-controlled "Neurocaster" drones, we find a girl named Michelle Greene (Millie Bobbie Brown) answering The Call To Adventure when a robot (voiced by Alan Tudyk) based on a cartoon enjoyed by both herself and her departed younger brother Christopher (Woody Norman) finds her and urges her to venture into the Robot Exclusion Zone, a No-Man's Land in the American Southwest populated by a new nation of defeated and broken robots, forced to live reservation-style by a treaty signed between robot-leader Mr. Peanut (yes, you read that right- MR. PEANUT, voiced by Woody Harrelson, as a robotic snack-mascot turned civil-rights leader) and Sentre Technologies CEO and creator of the Neurocaster technology Ethan Skate (Stanley Tucci), where Michelle will find the doctor (Ke Huy Quan, proving he deserved that Oscar win from a few years back) who can reunite her with her brother. Along the way, Michelle and "Kid Cosmic" enlist the help of John Keats (Chris Pratt), a soldier turned black-market smuggler of goods recovered from "The EX" and his construction-robot buddy Herman (voiced by Anthony Mackie) and run afoul of Colonel Marshall Bradbury (Giancarlo Esposito), a robot-hunter and veteran of the Robot War known as "The Butcher Of Schenecktady." Yeah, I'll cut to the quick- this movie flat-out RULES. The Russo Brothers have proven themselves to be fiercely talented and imaginative filmmaker ever since "Captain America: The Winter Soldier," and here they prove their directorial-chops yet again. A tale of humans and robots, of technology run amok, and of machines more human than the average human- yes, even Mr. Peanut. MISTER. FREAKING. PEANUT. As "Robot Abraham Lincoln, by way of Martin Luther King Jr." Everyone in the cast came to play, including a voiceover talent-pool rounded out by the likes of Brian Cox, Hank Azaria, Jenny Slate, Billy Bob Thorton and NFL tight-end Rob "Gronk" Gronkowski. This movie pulls no punches, either in terms of action or in terms of its central themes of anti-escapism, robot civil rights and the lengths certain tech-"geniuses" will go to in the name of technological and scientific advancement. Ethan Skate proves to be as despicable as certain real-world tech-giants (y'all know who I'm talking about), even referred to by Bradbury as "less human than a robot." Exactly why would be telling... you'll just have to watch this and see for yourself. FOUR SPELLBOOKS OUT OF FOUR. Like the man said... "I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place where you can get a decent meal." And "The Electric State" is an excellent reminder that workers are people too, and the most important connections human beings can make is with their fellow sapients.

[carsonian]

Cap-IM Rec Week: Absolute Faves Monday

@cap-ironman, in no particular order:

"One-Man Army" by Captain_Panda

Takes place immediately after the Chitauri attack in Avengers 1. Steve is running himself into the ground. Tony notices. Then Steve gets knocked down hard. And Tony intervenes.

Mt. Everest. The fic that I've made 20+ fanarts for, the one that's been ricocheting around my noggin since I first read it. Ahh, OMA. You big, bombastic beauty.

"Role of a Lifetime" by Annie D (scaramouche) (@no-gorms)

It’s been almost a year since Tony was rescued from the Ten Rings by SHIELD. In this time, Tony has forged a new path for Stark Industries and taken on a new under-the-radar role as a consultant for SHIELD. Tony’s SHIELD job eventually brings him into contact with the newest Captain America, who’s a pretty cool guy, though for security reasons Tony can’t know his real name or see his face without the Captain America mask. This is also about the time that Tony notices a certain Mr. Stevens, a new hire in SI’s corporate office...

This AU….this AU… I tell ya, THIS AU….this is some high-quality, top-grade, cutting-edge, organically grown, grass-fed, imdb ten of ten, five-star michelin, test-tube perfection, new york bestseller, billboard luster, knockout buster shiz.

"Meso Park" by Captain_Panda

As the head theropod keeper for A.I.M.'s extraordinary new project, Steve Rogers wants a smooth summer opening. Then the unthinkable happens, on the same day the investor of a lifetime arrives, ready to throw his support behind the world's most ambitious theme park. Can Meso Park survive the upheaval? Can Steve? Tune in to this dinosaur-themed adventure inspired by Michael Crichton's classic, Jurassic Park.

I've said it many times before, I'll say it again: if Meso Park has 100 fans, I'm one of em. If Meso Park has 10 fans, I'm one of em. If Meso Park has 1 fan, that fan is me. If Meso Park has 0 fans, I am no longer alive. It's not yet finished and I'm already sure it's the fic of the decade. That's just Meso Park for you.

"Gather Ye Rosebuds" by lazywriter7

It isn’t like that, for many people. For them, love is the point: the axis around which everything else revolves, the destination at the end of a long, tumultuous journey. Realisation, confession, resolution. Happy ending. That’s how it goes. And love was a point in Tony Stark’s journey, except it came towards the beginning, rather than the end. The issue, instead of the solution. He hasn’t been alone on the trip, of course. Steve’s been there: sometimes three steps behind, sometimes waiting up ahead by the turn of the road. They’ve sprinted and stumbled, sometimes stood still and refused to move on ahead, sometimes thought of turning away altogether. Steve and Tony’s story began after they fell in love, and this is about how they fell in everything else.

I read this Way Back When, and I remember thinking I'd never seen such a convincing portrayal of MCU SteveTony and how a genuine relationship between the two of them could emerge while still accounting for (hold your puke) canon. Still rock-solid all the way through; knock against the fic at any point, and it will answer back with a fun two-part joke. Lush stuff.

"The First Time I Went Dancing Sober" by schemingreader

Steve Rogers is a great physical therapist who works with sick kids. Tony Stark is a damaged biotech engineering genius who really wants to be one of the good guys.

I've recc'd this before so I won't blabber on but rest assured it is heartwrenchingly good.

"But Your Spirit is Untainted; I Can Dedicate You Still" by BlossomsintheMist (@blossomsinthemist)

The incursions crisis is over, and Steve and Tony have gotten back together, but nothing is the same as it was. Fearing that things are broken between them forever, Steve asks Tony something unexpected to try to make things right. Or, Steve asks if Tony really meant what he said when he asked Steve to hurt him. Sequel to Might Have Cherished You More Wisely.

I couldn't give less of a FUCK that this isn't technically finished. It is finished, to ME. The character-building in this story is just rich and fleshy and the stuff of true finesse. I read this every once in a while just to have the taste of masterful storytelling on my tongue. You should, too ;)

"Sins of Omission" by Kiyaar (@kiyaar)

A Post-Civil War, Pre-Secret Invasion AU where Steve is dead, Tony's a mess, and everything sucks. In which Tony deals poorly with Steve's death, falls off the wagon, sees ghosts, and misses a lot. Oh, and the Skrulls are about to invade.

When I first came across this fic, I devoured it in about 2 days and proceeded to be devoured by it for the next 2 months. :) Lovely stuff!

"Catechism" by manic_intent (@manic-intent)

Inspired by fanart seen on tumblr, this is an End of Days story, with all the Avengers as Archangels. Tony had always known that he was a special snowflake. He just hadn't realized exactly how special.

Listen. I'm a simple gal. This ticks off all the boxes, uh-hello!

"not gruesome, just human" by isozyme (@isozyme)

“I need to crash on someone’s couch for a while. Your couch. I need to crash on your couch,” Tony says. Steve’s mouth opens. If he asks why Tony’s going to bolt, he can feel the certainty of it under his sternum. He doesn’t have a sternum anymore, just a tangle of metal under his skin. Too many things have punched through it to get to his heart. There hasn’t been enough bone left to reconstruct anything made of flesh in a long time. “There’s borscht on the stove,” Steve says.

Raw. Punchy. Kind of makes me want to weep. Kind of makes me smile. Lotsa stuff that you can only write about when you've been down and which after reading will lift you right back up.

And I'll stop myself there because I could definitely just go on and on and on.

Go forth: SteveTony lovers, fuckers, ambassadors, champions, perverts, freaks, losers, dreamers, legends! Read, re-read, kudo, comment, spread legs and spread love.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #326: WIND from the EAST

November, 1990

Earth's Mightiest Heroes have just fought their newest opponent. Now the Invincible Iron Man has to pick up the pieces. Good luck, Shellhead.

For some reason, the combination of the cover text and everyone being flat on their ass except one person who all hope now lies with against a fiendish foe gives this cover a retro feel.

I can't point to a specific example, it just has an older energy to it.

Anyway. Have you ever noticed that if you squint, the distribution of red versus gold on Iron Man's armor kinda sorta forms an I? With the Iron Panties and the chest piece forming the crossbars? A neat way to give him that superhero initial thing.

Last times in Avengers: Uh. There's been a lot of filler. John Byrne quit over editorial interference and there's been a couple writers since, all doing their own wheel spinning. So we get to the point where the most important last time in Avengers was Avengers Island getting sunk in Acts of Vengeance.

Remember how Michael O'Brien had spent a lot of money getting a new meeting room table for the Avengers, only to be told that Thor wanted to salvage something instead? Yeah, we open on the Avengers making a new meeting table.

It's kinda awesome.

Thor and Sersi forge the big A inlay, with Sersi heating up metal scavenged from girders of the mansion destroyed by the Masters of Evil and Thor Mjolniring the shit out of it.

The Avengers actually let Michael O'Brien help (probably to ease the sting of completely wasting his time before). O'Brien had a table top hand-carved from black basalt scavenged from the sunken Hydrobase.

So the new table is going to be a bit of the previous two bases. With the whole team chipping in to help assemble it. At least, everyone listed on the cover. Quasar has apparently dropped out between issues. Or Larry Hama doesn't want to write him.

But anyway, Thor and Sersi make the A sigil. She-Hulk gouges an A-shaped space in the basalt with her fingernails. Iron Man visits from the West Coast team just to put together all the communication and display systems for the table. And Cap supervises.

As far as throwaway downtime sequences go, I quite like this.

Since the Avengers are incorporating their history into the new table, Sersi decides to give Captain America a little gift. He had a scrapbook of Avengers adventures that was lost when Hydrobase sank. Sersi used a mysterious Eternal space-time bending process to recreate it.

That's nice of her.

While looking at a Daily Bugle photo of the Avengers fighting the Masters of Evil in issue #6, Iron Man almost says he was in that fight before doing a verbal backspace.

Iron Man: "Look at that front page photo from the 'Bugle'... the old Avengers battling the Masters of Evil! That was some fight we -- uh... I mean, you were in!" She-Hulk: "Sure, dude. That was the other guy in the tin suit, right?" Iron Man: "Absolutely. We are all well aware of the death of the original Iron Man..." She-Hulk: "... and you're just another anonymous employee of Stark Enterprises!"

I still have no idea why Tony is pretending he's not Iron Man to his Avengers friends. As a running subplot, it's not going anywhere. It's just repeating Iron Man saying that he's totally not the same guy they had three hundred adventures with and whichever Avenger he's talking to going 'riiiiiiight.'

Speaking of running subplots, there seems to be some conflicting writers on whether Jarvis suffered permanent damage to his vision after being beaten half to death by Mr Hyde.

Some writers still portray him wearing it. In this comic, Larry Hama has Jarvis call the eyepatch silly.

Anyway. Plot.

Big, buff black superhero Rage rings the doorbell of the Mansion construction site and says he's here to sign up to be an Avenger.

Jarvis tells him that one doesn't just show up and ask to be an Avenger. Factually incorrect, Jarvis. A lot of people do that. Like Hawkeye. But Jarvis also says that there's a lot of security checks and testing that one must go through.

Rage sees this as a runaround and just kinda walks in despite Jarvis.

Captain America comes to find out what the hubbub is and Rage asks the pretty legitimate question of why the Avengers don't have any African-American members.

Geez, this is a question that comes up somewhat frequently. You'd think that it would sink in or something.

In an in-universe sense, the Avengers just kinda form teams based on whoever is available. In an out-of-universe sense, it's a very legitimate criticism to lob. Why don't the Avengers have reflect the diversity of America better? Didn't the Avengers used to have a black chairwoman? What happened to her? Oh, an old white man manipulated her out of a job? That's a bad look.

Captain America responds, hey, what about Black Panther and Falcon! I have some black friends!

And Rage goes, they're not here, are they? And more specifically, he points out that Black Panther is a rich king. And that Falcon only joined the team because the government demanded they meet equal opportunity standards. (Wait, how do you know THAT?) Anyway, it sounds like Falcon is retired or something at the moment?

(Neither of them mention Monica. Who, y'know, led the team!)

Captain America: "You're beginning to tick me off, Rage... First off, nobody just walks in and gets to be an Avenger -- no matter if they're white, black, yellow, or green, for that matter!"

Again, factually incorrect. Starfox showed up from another planet and asked to join. And the only hurdle that required was for him to change his name because Reagan said so.

Captain America: "And just what can you do that qualifies you to be a super hero in the first place?" Rage: "What can I do? I've got super-human strength... I'm virtually indestructible -- And I believe in truth, justice, and the dignity of man."

He raises a good point.

And I like his look. The leather jacket look would definitely make him look unique on the line-up beside all the more superhero-y outfits. But having RAGE on the back of the jacket does meet superhero branding guidelines. Also, luchador mask. Pretty cool.

I don't love the codename Rage though. Superhero codenames that are just Noun are my least favorite.

Anyway, Rage accuses Cap of judging him by his appearance and thinking that he'd be bad for the Avengers' image.

Sersi and the rest of the Avengers wander out to see what's going on and Sersi sees Rage gesturing dramatically at Captain America.

So just as Rage is accusing Cap "I bet you think that I'll resort to violence at any second!", Sersi goes oh no, I bet that guy is going to resort to violence and full force blasts Rage with eye lasers.

Everyone remember that this is all Sersi's fault.

Despite Cap yelling at Sersi to not do this thing, Thor and She-Hulk assume that they're in a fight scene now and rush forward to escalate things further.

She-Hulk: "C'mon and pick on somebody your own size!" Rage: "Is that a challenge?"

Rage didn't start this. But he's not about to de-escalate either.

Cap manages to get everyone to simmer down.

Captain America: "There's been a terrible misunderstanding! Rage wasn't attacking me, he was trying to make a point... in fact a very valid point about perceptions!"

Sersi defends herself saying that she felt a lot of hostility in the scene before she eye lasered and Cap has to explain to the millennia old woman that conversations can be angry sometimes.

Rage decides that Actually, he doesn't want to be part of this "stupid organization anymore", which is more than valid.

Rage: "All you ever do is bash cosmic menaces off in some alternate reality or battle bad guys who have nothing better to do than destroy your headquarters! Nobody cares if super-villains fight super heroes! That don't mean diddly-squat to some kid in the inner city... I just want to use my powers to make life better for mankind, and if you don't know it, most of mankind is the little guy who never gets the benefit of your heroics!"

Then he slams the door behind him and walks off.

Hm. This is also something that comes up with the Avengers a lot. The idea that stopping alien invasions isn't Real. It's an argument that makes more sense as an out-of-universe argument than an in-universe one.

It doesn't matter to the little guy that the Avengers stopped a giant metal space man from eating the Earth? That's what we're going with? That's a dumb thing to say.

Benefit of the doubt, maybe this is more a statement of intent from Larry Hama about what kind of Avengers run he wants to do. As opposed to the cheap shot it usually is when some random person says that Avengers don't deal with Real Problems.

I do have to say, I like what Larry Hama did here by starting the issue with the Avengers being all chummy and building a table together and then assuming the worst of an outsider.

Paints the Avengers as maybe being a little clique-ish. Like maybe they need a new person to join and shake things up a little.

Anyway, Iron Man missed all of the Rage stuff but he shows up to tell them that Plot is happening.

Interspersed with the Rage conversation, there's been other stuff going on with Raymond Sikorski, National Security Council guy and liaison to the Avengers, arranging for Lt. Ramskov, hero of Chernobyl, to get a bone marrow transplant from Dr Estivez at Metropolitan General Hospital to treat his leukemia.

The man very heroically braved Chernobyl to shut down a steam pipe that was blasting radioactive vapor into the atmosphere, despite knowing his radiation suit would not be sufficient to protect him.

Problem though. Nobody told Dr Estivez so she is positively alarmed when a crane drops a man in a big containment suit with a radiation symbol on it.

She is further alarmed to hear that Lt. Ramskov has received experimental treatments at Tyuratam. Which is a space center and not a hospital.

These are legitimate concerns. But before you go thinking Dr Estivez is a total voice of reason, when she's giving Lt. Ramskov a look-over, she notices the containment suit is pumping sedatives and muscle relaxants into his bloodstream, she decides to disconnect the pump without asking why.

Granted, her objection is that she can't operate on a dude with unknown drugs in his system but... c'mon. Don't just pull things loose from a containment suit!

Without the drugs, Lt. Ramskov wakes up and starts glowing.

And then he melts through the floor.

... I feel like everyone in the room should get tested for radiation exposure.

Anyway, Sikorski decides this boondoggle should be the Avengers' problem and calls them in. And that brings us back around to Iron Man telling the rest of the team about Plot.

And as the Avengers investigate the hole in the hospital floor, it turns out I was wrong. Ramskov didn't melt through the floor. There's no sign of melting. No increase in the background radiation level. Iron Man sciences that it was quark manipulation what done it.

I don't have enough of a science brain to figure out what that means.

Ramskov's handler/escort, Ms Zhukova tells the Avengers that they better not kill Lt. Ramskov, Hero of the Soviet Union, on American soil! That'd be most bad!

Captain America has to tell her that the Avengers don't really make a habit of killing.

At least in these times. Superhero comics have changed.

Dr Estivez tells She-Hulk that the containment suit and the way Ramskov was kept drugged into a catatonic state leads her to believe that the Soviets were aware of Ramskov's abilities and were trying to keep America from finding out about them.

Ms Zhukova is shocked. Offended even.

And then there's an earthquake and the floor collapses, sending Dr Estivez, Ms Zhukova, and She-Hulk down into the pit beneath the hospital.

Well, She-Hulk is obviously fine. She fell through an entire building once, on purpose. The other two women might get hurt, though.

Iron Man and Thor leap into the pit and save the two normal women. She-Hulk declines being caught because "I could fall twice this distance and not muss my hair!"

And she falls to the lowest subbasement. Which looks like a sewer but She-Hulk calls it a conduit tunnel. She spots some footprints on the floor and goes looking for Lt Ramskov.

Thor and Iron Man want to deposit the two normal women back up in the hospital but both insist on joining the search for Ramskov. Zhukova because she is responsible for him and Dr Estivez because Ramskov is under her care and this is a medical problem!

So the two heroes land in the conduit tunnel and, like She-Hulk, start following the footprints.

Meanwhile, Ramskov. He is still hallucinating his backstory, miming turning a valve as he remembers trying to shut down the steam pipe back in Chernobyl.

But the flashback thickens! In his memory, he sees two mysterious figures in lead suits, dismantling a device attached to the reactor. Ramskov chases them because messing with the reactor could lead to a total meltdown!

... I thought Chernobyl had already melted down. But even still, it was not a situation that would benefit from being made worse.

Ramskov is still hallucinating backstory when Thor and She-Hulk find him. And since She-Hulk happens to be carrying a half-melted pipe she found, Ramskov sees the two heroes as the two lead-suited figures from his memory, who assaulted him with a crowbar and a wrench when he cornered them.

Ramskov punches She-Hulk in the head so Thor retaliates and Mjolnirs the Hero of Chernobyl in the helmet.

Meanwhile, Iron Man is walking with Ms Zhukova and Dr Estivez. The doctor repeats what she heard about Ramskov receiving treatments at the Tyuratam Space Center and now Iron Man is suspicious about this whole thing too.

He begins to ask if Ramskov is part of a special weapons program but then there's another earthquake. Iron Man tells the two women to stay put and goes to check on Thor and She-Hulk.

Where he finds them flat on their asses, as on the cover.

Ms Zhukova and Dr Estivez both refuse to listen to Iron Man, though, chasing after him.

Zhukova: "I cannot let them endanger the integrity of Ramskov's containment suit!" Dr Estivez: "He's still my patient, too!"

You could at least hang back a safe distance but no. They chase right up to where Iron Man is and where Ramskov is glowing and just making physics weep.

Iron Man: "Ramskov is emitting energy in wavelengths that don't exist on any scale! He's dismantling vector bosons and doing things to gluons that should never be done!"

That sounds bad!

Still reliving his memories, Ramskov tears open his containment suit as he tore off his radiation suit after it was ripped by the two men in the past times. Which just intensifies the energy he's putting out in the present.

I hope Thor and She-Hulk's gluons are okay.

Meanwhile, Rage is still in this book.

I figured he'd wind up joining the A-plot but it seems he's got his own subplot going on right now.

Rage walks up to a building that a drug dealer called L.D. 50 operates out of and tells some prospective customers to beat it because business is closing its doors.

Some of L.D. 50's men come out and try to shoot Rage with bullets from their guns for scaring off the customers and not gtfo-ing when they told him to.

Rage does his best Luke Cage, just walking through the gunfire.

I sorta wonder whether Rage exists because Luke Cage wasn't available to use. There's some overlap in powerset and the names rhyme. But Larry Hama is clear on what his inspirations for the character were and Luke Cage was not mentioned.

The muscle run upstairs to warn their vocabulary rich boss that some bulletproof dude is causing trouble. To his credit, L.D. 50 actually thinks of a possible way to deal with a bulletproof dude. Just throw him out a window.

But Rage didn't need to go upstairs to shut down L.D. 50. He pulled a Cage and now he's pulling a Sampson.

Rage: "This tenement was condemned by the city, but drug money bribed the inspectors and the misery of the people furnished it in luxury... It's about time it all came tumbling down!"

Then he shoves the load-bearing columns and the building starts to collapses. I can see why it was condemned.

I guess that's Rage dealing with the Real Problems tm that the Avengers don't have time for.

Next time in Avengers, the dimension of badly-drawn rocks, apparently. But actually next time, hopping back over to West Coast Avengers for some Great Lakes Avengers! Woo.

Follow @essential-avengers for more excitement noises. Like and reblog and comment and leave money for me under rocks. Any rock will do. It doesn't have to be badly-drawn.

[3pirouette]

Fic: The Captain and The Missus (3/?)

Title: The Captain and The Missus 

By: TriplePirouette/3Pirouette

Spoilers: AU of CA:TFA

Disclaimer: They're not mine.

Distribution: AO3 Anyone else please ask first :) 

Story Summary: Instead of wanting to recreate the serum, Schmidt wants every trace of it wiped from existence so he can be the sole one to benefit from it. This means that Steve’s life is in danger, and Peggy’s new job is to keep him alive as he travels in hiding with the USO tour. 

Story A/N: AU of CA: TFA, based on @roboticonography’s idea of having Peggy go on tour with Steve as “Mrs. America”

(Robot’s post HERE: https://3pirouette.tumblr.com/post/654017864817360896/steggy-24-49)

SO... Yes. yes, it's true. I've somehow managed to only update this once a year during the past three years for Steggy Week. At least I'm consistent.

For 2023, this satisfies Steggy Week Day 2: WIPs and Updates.

Chapter 3: Getting on the Right Track

Summary: Peggy and Steve are off on their adventure, but she’ll need to start relying on him just as much as she wants him to rely on her if this is going to work.

A/N: Yes. I’ve now posted one chapter a year for three years in a row for Steggy Week. It’s become tradition. I think a lot of it has to do with this story really just coming slow. I love it, but it’s not flowing as nicely as I’d like it to, so when I get to Steggy Week, I see the WIP category, and go “oh! I should update that!”

So, yeah. Please be kind about it.

~*~

Peggy huffed as she sat on the bench, sliding over to make room for him, irritated. “I’m already not liking this.”

Steve settled softly, trying to tuck his body into a space that used to seem roomy to his 90-pound self, and now seemed cramped for his new body. “The seat?” He turned and looked up the aisle. “I can ask the conductor if there’s—"

“No, no,” she interrupted him, setting her bag on her lap and playing with the edge. “Playing the nagging wife. ‘Oh, do be gentle! My grandmother’s china is in there! Please keep that on the bottom, men, I don’t want it tipping. Oh, could you do me a favor and make sure all our trunks are labeled? Couldn’t lose one, you know!’” She huffed again, looking over at him, dropping her voice to a whisper. “Those men nearly dropped that entire trunk full of ammunition and finely tuned decoders!”

Steve looked alarmed and dropped his voice, leaning in to her. “Could they have exploded?”

She pressed her lips and turned away for a moment, trying not to be angry for his ignorance. “No,” she mumbled, looking back, “But we won’t get another chance at getting more decoders or half of the other kit in there if something breaks or de-calibrates. It won’t explode, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t delicate.”

Steve nodded, letting the information settle for a moment. “I was a little curious why you were being so specific about them.”

Peggy glanced around the sparsely populated car, still caught up in her anxiety. The car ride to the train station had been quiet, which she had hoped came across as contentment, but it was really more her nerves than anything. “I understand why we couldn’t take a transport, but I’d take a well-trained private over a single one of those brutes tossing around our luggage any day. I felt like I was running basic training all over again out there. Everyone on this train must think you’re horribly hen-pecked.”

For a moment she saw that 90-pound man reemerge as he twiddled his thumbs and his jaw opened and closed as he tried to come up with an answer that would appease her. It was enough to crack the wall of growing anxiety and soften her just a little bit. She took pity on him and set her hand on his to stop the fidgeting. “I’m being ridiculous.” She started another sentence, but had to turn away as she yawned, big and wide, into her elbow.

“Tired?” Steve asked, his fingers almost, but not quite, holding her hand.

She sighed, turning back to him as the train rumbled to life under them. “A bit. Had trouble sleeping last night.”

“Why don’t you take a nap?” He shrugged, half smiling. “We’ve got, what… six hours?”

Peggy clicked her tongue behind her teeth and pulled her hand back, sitting tall. “That’s exactly why I can’t take a nap.” She took a deep breath, looking around the train. “Beginnings and endings of operations are the most dangerous part. Anyone could have followed us here. I can’t let my guard down for a second.”

“Peggy,” he started, almost stern, “there’s barely anyone on this train car. I don’t think that the eighty-year-old woman or the two little kids over there are planning anything nefarious. How could they have figured out our plan and followed us here already?”

She looked at him hard, knowing he was trying to placate her. “How, indeed?” She mused sarcastically, “And how do you think a Hydra Agent managed his way into a top secret SSR bunker to try to kill you and Erskine, hum?” She didn’t mean to be sharp, didn’t mean to open the wound that was still too close to the surface, but the thought still kept her up at night.

That man shouldn’t have been able to get in there. Someone in the SSR was ratting them out to Hydra.

That meant that nothing, nothing they were going to do that anyone else knew about, was safe.

Especially putting Steve in this damn show.

Steve nodded in understanding, shrugging half-heartedly, a shadow passing over his face at the thoughts of what had happened. “I get it, I do.”

“I have to keep you safe.” She replied softly, urgency filling her voice. “I can’t let my guard down, even for a moment.”

“So what?” he didn’t miss a beat, his own eyes accusing now, “You’re not going to ever fall asleep?”

“Well, I—”

He shook his head. “No, Peg. This isn’t one sided.”

She leaned forward, dropping her voice down low, “It’s my job to keep you alive, and I’m damn well not going to—”

He reached over, grabbing her hand. The movement was enough to derail her frustration and turn it to curiosity as he held her left hand up to his. “This, Peg, says we’re partners.” He moved his hands, letting their matching rings shine in the light, smiling a little and letting his own frustration morph to earnestness. “For better or for worse. Like it or not. You and me against the world.”

Peggy didn’t want to admit that the moment, born out of frustration and desperation, was extremely tender, or that she felt a little thrill of excitement at the confident, strong way he took her hand, or that she felt cared for in the soft way that he cradled her hand as he lined up their rings. No, she tried to ignore the fact that his eyes were damn near sparkling as he said those words, filled with all the emotions she was feeling, and maybe even more. She really, really didn’t want to admit that of all the moments in her life, that was the most damn romantic of them all.

“Steve, I…” Her voice drifted away. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to say, but she knew she needed to protest, needed to change this moment before it got way out of hand.

“We’re a team,” he whispered. “The moment we left that base this morning, it was just us. I don’t like to think about the fact that someone has already tried to kill me, and that it’ll probably happen again, and I don’t like thinking about the fact that you’re in that line of fire with me. But you’re here to protect me, and even though no one’s said it before now, I’m saying it and I mean it: I’m protecting you, too.”

Peggy struggled for composure; she tried to keep a straight face when everything inside her was falling apart. She’d never been one for big declarations or sappy sentiments and coming from anyone else, it might have felt trite or overly sugary, but Peggy knew with every fiber of her being that Steve meant it. He well and truly meant it.

She couldn’t remember if anyone had ever said something so simple in such a profound way to her before. She couldn’t remember if she’d ever believed someone so fervently before.

It was a struggle to pull her focus back out, to keep the world from closing in until there was just the two of them, hands cradled together, train bouncing below them as Steve just happened to outdo her ex-fiance’s proposal of marriage in a few earnest words, but she managed it. “Thank you,” she whispered, knowing the words were not enough for the depth of the sentiment he just expressed. She forced the tension to break with a smile, squeezing his hand. “You don’t need to work so hard, Steve, I’ve already married you.”

He chuckled, the heaviness around them lightening almost instantly. He looked away, ears turning red as he whispered into the aisle, “Maybe I’m trying to get you to fall in love with me.”

“Hum?” The questioning sound was out of her throat before she could stop herself. She knew very well what he’d said, but didn’t quite want to believe it. She managed to keep a straight face as he panicked, letting go of her hand and shaking his head.

“Nothing,” he tried to cover, poorly, and forced a nervous smile at her. “You should take a nap, really.”

Her smile only lifted her lips a little as she ducked her head. “To be honest, I don’t know if I could if I wanted to, I’m still so keyed up.”

This time his smile was genuine as he rooted in his pocket to pull out a small paperback. “Offer stands. I don’t need much sleep these days, anyway.”

She watched him, unabashedly, as he turned to the book and flipped through until he found his page. Without thought she reached out, hand wrapping around his wrist to get his attention. He looked at her, but didn’t say anything.

“That meant a lot,” she managed to choke out, uncomfortable with the way the words made her feel exposed, but knowing she needed to make him understand how she felt, “what you said about us. You and me.”

The corner of his mouth ticked up. “Together against the world.”

“Yes,” she could feel the stress start to drain from her. “A team.” She took a slow, deep breath. It was like the worry, the anxiety of the last two days was getting left behind them with each passing second and each mile they put between the base and themselves, but she’d never been more serious. “I’m going to hold up my end, Steve, I promise.”

“I know you will,” he put down the book, flipping his hand and lacing their fingers together. “And I’ll keep up mine.”

~*~

She remembered holding his hand, contentedly, looking out the window and pretending she was watching the landscape pass them by while he read with one hand, but instead took the time to clock each and every passenger, to look them over in the reflection and try to gauge their threat level.

Somewhere after the pre-teen boy three rows up, she realized she had her head on his shoulder. It didn’t much seem to matter, though, as she could still hear him turning pages and they were supposed to be married, after all.

Just after the man two rows back, she thought that she’d just close her eyes for a minute.

Just one.

And five hours later, she woke up tucked into Steve’s side as the train slowed, chugging into the station.

~*~

They were hustled from the station to the theater by a small man with a pinched face, who seemed both annoyed by and indifferent to their presence. He assured them that their trunks would make it to their hotel room safely before he ushered them off the platform and into a small car.

She was both impressed and somewhat relieved that Steve managed to make his own fuss about the trunks as they were ushered off the train, she didn’t even need to speak a word on the subject.

They were quiet in the car, the trip quite a bit longer than they expected. “I thought we were going to be in DC?” Steve asked as the man navigated the streets.

“The show will open in DC, rehearsals are outside of the city,” the man replied. “Your hotel is close to the theater, don’t worry.” He grumbled, mumbling under his breath, “I know you’re worried about your trunks.”

Peggy tried to hold back her smile, but couldn’t. Steve gave her a gentle tap with his elbow, and she acknowledged his performance on the subject with a grateful bow of her head.

“How are you feeling?” He spoke softly. Even though they were bound to be overheard by their driver, who was under no obligation to keep anything he heard a secret, his soft voice went a long way to making the question feel at least a little private.

“Much better,” she replied just as quietly. “Suppose I was more tired than I thought.”

She expected a smile, or maybe a flirt- something he’d been more confident in over the last day- but instead he sobered and dropped his voice even lower. “I’m glad you felt safe enough. I always want you to feel safe with me.”

She couldn’t help but smile this time. “I do.”

~*~

It occurred to Peggy, as she walked into the theater, that she’d never been in one as something other than a patron. She’d gone for films and for the occasional play, even to hear concerts… but she’d never been in a theater where she wasn’t ushered to her seat and treated to a performance.

She was stunned as she followed Steve through the backstage area, stepping over coils of rope and avoiding scattered set-pieces that were half painted and half built. The bright white backstage lights were nothing compared to the colorful performance lights she was used to. She’d always thought theaters seemed too glamorous, so frivolous, and yet, there was exposed, dirty brick and sawdust everywhere. There wasn’t a luxurious velvet curtain in sight and instead it seemed little more than a warehouse with an audience.

It left her with an odd feeling of awareness, as if it was the first time she realized everything she’d seen on a stage really was just smoke and mirrors, sets and rigs and pulleys that made Peter Pan fly and Hamlet’s father rise from the grave. Seeing the lighting rigs bare overhead and the mess of lights and wires and rope on the stage made her feel a peculiar sensation, as if she was seeing something no one was ever meant to see.

“About six feet to the left!”

The shout pulled her out of her thoughts, and immediately reminded her that this was a place that posed an extreme danger for the both of them. The man who was shouting was a rotund man standing just below the stage, eyes on the two workers hanging a large American Flag from the rigging. He shook his head then caught sight of them, only looking slightly interested.

“You must be my headliners!” He gestured for their pinch-faced chauffeur to bring them down the stairs to him. He watched as Steve helped Peggy down the steep steps at the front of the stage with a hand, the raw wood wobbly. “Don’t worry about that,” he bellowed, “They may be unsteady, but they won’t be there for the show. Just while we’re getting the stage set up.” He shot a careful look over to where the men were hanging the flag, “It’s been busy around here since we got the rewrites.”

He held out his hand to Steve, “I’m Walter Pennington, Producer.”

“Steve Rogers,” He shook his hand, pulling back when he saw the man fight to keep a pleasant face at his strength. “And this is my wife, Peggy.”

Peggy knew right away what kind of man he was by the fact that he barely acknowledged her. No handshake, and barely even a nod. Instead, he kept his attention on Steve. It wasn’t that she wasn’t used to being looked over, but rather that it always stung.

“Well, they weren’t lying that you’re strong,” Walter said, flexing his hand a few times. “That’s good.” He took another short glance at Peggy. “We were surprised you’d want to bring the little lady with you, never mind incorporate her into the show.” He laughed, “I’m even more shocked Brandt went for it.”

Steve glanced over at Peggy. Neither of them had been briefed on what, exactly, Brant had told the people who were making the show, and she realized that her nap today really was lost time. They had no story put together and would be making things up as they went- at least for today.

That was always dangerous territory.

“Well, we’re still newlyweds,” Steve managed the reply fairly quickly, pulling Peggy into his side. “How could I leave a gal like this back home?”

She felt Steve’s hand just barely tighten at her shoulder, and she could tell he was just as uncomfortable with the man’s suggestive gaze as she was. “I guess not,” Pennington finally mumbled, though Peggy was sure there was something else he wanted to say.

Walter cleared his throat and finally looked at her face, addressing her directly. “I suppose we can work you into a few of the singing numbers, though that’s really up to the director.”

“I don’t sing,” she declared, arching an eyebrow at the man. His clothes said high class but the way he leered at her proved he hadn’t had a proper upbringing.

“Well, then,” he looked her up and down again, not hiding it, “At least you’ll look good in the kick line.”

Peggy wished she could punch him, the way he looked at her reminiscent of far too many men who thought they were better than her. She could feel Steve tensing up beside her. “And I don’t dance.”

He cleared his throat, crossing his arms. “Oh, you don’t, huh?” He leaned over to Steve, “What does she do?”

“Well, she…” Steve stuttered only for a second, thinking on his feet and smiling that boyish smile of his, “she’s swell at telling stories, pretty versatile, really, and just look at that smile!”

The producer turned his head back to her and she flashed him her best grin, trying her best to hide the disgust and sarcasm. “’Swell’ at telling stories?” He sighed. “I’m supposed to sell a great American hero who married a Brit?”

“I mean, we are allies,” Steve tried to rationalize.

Walter sighed, rubbing at his forehead. “What did Brandt think, you were going to stand on stage and smile? You might have a nice set of gams there, but that and a nickel will get you a cup of coffee.”

“I think you’ll find,” Peggy started loud, clear, and very American sounding, “that I can blend in quite well when necessary. I’m happy to affect any accent you’ll need for the stage, and do most anything except sing and dance.”

Walter looked up at Steve, obviously not used to being talked to in that manner by a woman, waiting for Steve to say something to her. Instead, he gave her a little squeeze and met the man’s confused gaze with a proud smirk. “That’s my girl!”

He wasn’t pleased, and he didn’t try to hide it. “Rehearsals start tomorrow, you’ll get your script then.”

“How long will we be here in rehearsals?” Steve asked, genuinely interested. Peggy wanted to know, too. They had woefully little information about the process.

“Three weeks of rehearsals then a soft opening run of four shows here. You open in DC for a week, then there’s a cross country schedule.” He tipped his head to their chauffeur who had stayed close. “Dave there will bring you to your hotel.”

Peggy almost smiled. Their pinch-faced man had a name. Dave.

“You need anything while you’re here, you ask Dave. Once you’re on the road, you’re on your own. Got it?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve replied, almost reflexively.

Walter looked him up and down once more. “Yeah, I think they’ll believe you belong in the army.” He turned away from them, mumbling as he left, “Damn government contract.”

Peggy had only the barest of moments to share a stunned look with Steve before they were interrupted by Dave, who stepped in front of them and motioned for them to follow him back through the audience.

~*~

Their hotel was not quite homey, but not quite bleak: two high towers full of rooms with a central connecting lobby filled with the dining room and common rooms. It was housing all the staff and performers for the show, most of whom, at least according to Dave, already knew each other from being on the performance circuit.

Steve unlocked their room, pocketing the key and swinging open the door wide. It wasn’t much: pale cream colors on the walls and faded floral bedsheets with matching curtains, a worn loveseat and a tiny table with two unsteady chairs. The bathroom was small, but having their own private one was a luxury.

“Not too bad,” Steve mused, walking around. He patted the tops of their trunks, sitting across from the bed. “How do you think they fared?”

“Well enough, I’m sure.” Peggy smiled just a little, eyes falling on the single bed. “Better than a tent on the front,” she mused.

He chuckled a little, shoving his hands in his pocket. “Very big upgrade,’ he agreed. “Should we unpack?”

Peggy held up her hand, her wife façade falling and the agent taking over, serious and stoic. She pulled a small black box from her purse and flicked a small button, moving it up and down as she slowly side stepped her way through the room. She slid it over the dresser and under the bed, in the small shower stall and behind the toilet. Finally, she sighed happily, clicking the box off and gesturing to the room. “Proceed.”

He didn’t move, but rather pointed to the box in her hand. “What was that?”

“One of Howard’s designs,” she held it up, admiring it with a small smile. She tapped the small, dark bulb on the end. “It lights up in the presence of an electronic listening device.”

Steve looked around the room, crestfallen that he had been so blindly trusting of their accommodations. “So… we’re good?”

“For bugs? Yes. Though the walls seem about as thick as a piece of parchment, so we should get used to keeping our voices down.”

His shoulders fell just a bit more as the whole thing became just a little more real to him. “You… you really think I’m in danger here?”

Her lips pressed tight as she looked up to him, she forced the tiniest of smiles. “I think that Colonel Phillips is one of the smartest men I’ve ever worked with, and despite his misgivings about you, he’s a keen judge of people. I also think that if the goal was to simply guard you or keep you safe, not only are there many other people besides myself who can do that job, it could be easily accomplished by putting you in a cell in Alamogordo. The Colonel has a great distrust of Senator Brandt, and made sure I was the one sent with you. Brandt didn’t make that pick, no matter how he tried to sell it- Phillips did. He told me himself.” She took a deep breath. “He had this show all ready for you to go in to without more than a day’s notice, and is a main suspect in how that Hydra Agent got past our defenses. Whatever’s going on, Phillips wasn’t just trusting anyone with this, and I’m not going to take any of it lightly.”

He was silent for a moment, taking in all he hadn’t known: that Phillips picked Peggy, not Brandt, and that Brandt was a suspect for being in cahoots with Hydra. “Thank you,” he finally whispered out, forcing himself to move on. “I guess… I guess we should get unpacked.”

Peggy shook her head, “Only the littlest bit. If we make it look like we’re living out of the trunks, it’s less suspicious that we’re not unpacking two of them.”

He nodded, undoing the straps on the top one and opened it, moving aside to let Peggy see the artillery had made it safe and sound. “We should put these on the bottom, I think, and ours on top so it’ll be harder for anyone to snoop.”

Peggy smiled up at him, proud. “Thinking like a spy already!” She reached in and pulled out a small handgun and a little filled canvas bag. “That should do for now, make sure those straps are tight.”

Peggy set her bounty on the counter and moved to the second trunk as Steve tightened the straps and moved it deeper in the room, setting it in the back corner, then grabbing another trunk and stacking it on top of it. Peggy pulled out a pair of retractable batons and the boxes of clothes Howard had sent with them, setting those on the counter as well. When she turned back, Steve was at the edge of the bed, holding a small, wrapped package, looking more than a little bashful.

“I, uh…” he laughed nervously, looking down at his toes. “This seemed like a good idea at the time, but uh, seems corny now.”

“What is it?” Peggy asked softly, taking a small step closer and fighting to keep her hands from fidgeting in the folds of her skirt.

Steve turned red, but met her eyes with a big smile that reminded her of the one she’d seen on him at the beginning of basic training. “A wedding present.”

She swallowed, hard. “I… I haven’t gotten you anything.” The retort seemed silly, even to her ears, but it somehow relaxed him.

“I didn’t expect you to. I just…” He shrugged and stepped forward, holding it out. “Here.”

She took it in her hands, soft and light, and let her fingers run over the brown paper wrapping and the little blue ribbon bow around it. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d gotten a properly wrapped present. She realized she was taking her time, and looked up at him, smiling. “Thank you,” she almost whispered, still surprised.

He shoved his hands back in his pockets, shoulders up to his ears. Slowly she pulled at the bow, and separated the paper to reveal a piece of black fabric that looked suspiciously like a garter belt, but with a little more fabric to it. She looked up at him, his cheeks slowly burning red with embarrassment. “A garter?”

“It’s- it’s a holster.” He reached out one hand, almost touching it, then pulling back. “Or it’s supposed to be, anyway.” He cleared his throat and fought for composure. “After you left Howard’s lab yesterday he mentioned that his butler’s wife was a seamstress and had done the majority of the sewing for the… stuff he gave you.” Peggy fought to not laugh at how cute he was, struggling around the topic. “Anyway, he seemed to think there was some left, so I asked if she could make you something nice. Anna seemed to think you’d find this more useful.”

That caught her up short, even as she pulled the holster up to look at it. “She knows?”

Steve shrugged. “I was as surprised as you are, but apparently all she knows is that the fabric Howard gave her is supposed to be a lighter version of armor, and she figured if you’d need armor you’d need this.” One side of his lips turned up. “Sounded like a good idea, to me.”

Peggy smiled. The holster was genius: made out of the same protective fabric that the stockings and slips were made of, it would lay extremely flat against her thigh and the flap at the top would keep the shape from being too conspicuous. She’d been worried how she was going to keep a firearm on her when she needed to be on stage, and this had just made it very, very easy. “This is wonderful, Steve. Thank you.”

“You like it?” He sounded like a hopeful little boy.

Peggy bent over and slid it up her leg, reaching out and settling the small handgun she’d pulled from the trunk in it. “I love it!” She let her skirt fall back over her legs, and noticed that he’d looked away while her bare thigh was on display. She spun, letting the skirt settle. “Can you tell it’s there?”

He looked, swallowing as he stared at her legs. “Uh, no. No, I can’t.”

She smiled brightly. “Then it’s perfect.”

~*~

Peggy felt better with the gun nestled against her thigh as they walked down to the lobby. With the entirety of the show’s cast and crew staying at the hotel, they were providing breakfast and dinner each day. Steve and Peggy stopped at the double doors of the small banquet room, watching the people, most of whom seemed to know one another, hustle around the large buffet and bounce from table to table, chatting.

“Not too much different from the mess, I guess.” Steve mumbled, tugging at his shirt sleeves. The civilian clothes he changed into fit him tight across the shoulders, almost too tight, and the pants were too big by at least two sizes. Most of the clothes he brought with him needed tailoring, badly, but they were all he could piece together on short notice.

He’d only had this physique for less than a week, after all, and none of his old clothes fit. Even the socks were too small.

Peggy slipped her arm through his, setting them forward. “Stay close, please.”

“Not a problem,” he mumbled, trying to force smiles as they moved through the room. It was easy enough, stepping in line and filling plates. No one questioned that they were supposed to be there as everyone was enthralled in their own dinner conversations. Peggy struggled to split her attention, eyeing each performer in the room, looking for someone whose gaze lingered just a little too long or whose eyebrows knit a little too deeply, while trying to decide what to eat. Apparently, rationing wasn’t quite as bad here as it was in London, and nowhere near what it had been on the front lines. Bowls and platters were full of chicken and mashed potatoes and rolls and butter and there were little cakes at the end of the line that made her do a double take.

She hadn’t seen a proper dessert in months.

“Bloody Nora,” she mumbled, trying to keep from letting her eyes pile more than she could eat on her plate.

“Yeah, it’s a good spread,” Steve whispered beside her, not being shy about piling his plate high. “Better than rations, huh?”

She carefully picked out just one of the little finger cakes at the end of the table and looked up at him, astounded. “Does everyone in America eat like this?”

“This?” He laughed a little, taking his own cake and then following her to a corner where there was a free table. “No. This is pretty extravagant.” He set his plate down, noticing she set them in the corner, where they’d both have a good line of vision to keep nearly the whole dining room in view. “I’ll go grab us some drinks. Water? Tea?”

“Water, please” she replied, still a little shell shocked. She watched him take the few steps to another table and fill two tall glasses and she unfurled her napkin and revealed the silverware that had been waiting for them on the table. The room still buzzed, but she could see that it was with a jovial familiarity. People were talking like old friends, making new friends, smiling and laughing.

The mood, and the food, was a far cry from the front she’d grown used to during her time with the SSR. She wasn’t sure if that made things better or worse. It certainly made her anxious.

Steve slid in across from her, setting her glass down. He smiled and pulled out his silverware, taking no time before tucking into his food. He stopped a few bites in when he realized she hadn’t started. He hurriedly wiped his mouth like a little kid and sat up tall. “Did… did you want to say grace or something?”

“No, sorry,” Peggy lifted her fork and tried to smile. “Just… people watching, I suppose.”

He started eating again, this time a little slower, with his eyes on her more often. “Did you… notice anything?”

Peggy swallowed and dabbed at her lips, moving her peas around her plate with the fork. “No, which bothers me.” She sighed quietly, leaning in towards him, “I’m used to knowing more about the situations I’m headed into. We know nothing about these people. I don’t even know who could be lying about who they are because I don’t have any dossiers on them at all.”

“Brandt didn’t give you any of that stuff?” Steve asked, his eyebrow knitting as he speared a piece of chicken.

She shook her head, chewing a forkful of potatoes thoughtfully. “I suppose I could get their bios and headshots somehow, but it still gives us little to go on.”

Steve tapped the fork against his lips, looking around. “What if… what if it’s not anyone here?” He turned back to her. “Wouldn’t it be easier to be an audience member?”

Peggy sipped on her water, nodding. “Could do, yeah.” She looked around, too, picking at her chicken that had seemed so appetizing just a few minutes ago. “Easy in and out. But if it were me? Someone in the show would be invaluable.”

“Like you,” Steve mumbled, looking at his plate and shoving a big forkful in his lips before he could say anymore.

Peggy’s heart skipped a beat, but before she could reply, a shadow slid over them. They both looked up to a bright, smiling face. “So, you must be the guy?”

“Excuse me?” Steve swallowed hard.

“Like, the guy, right? As in Mister Captain America?” She smiled and pulled the chair behind her up to the table. “I’m Angie,” she held out her hand, waiting for Steve to take it.

“Steve.” His handshake was tentative, but that didn’t seem to deter her.

She turned right away and held it out to Peggy, too. “And you must be the Missus!”

“Peggy,” she swallowed the mouthful of food she’d forgotten about, pulling her free hand to cover her mouth as she shook Angie’s hand. “Sorry, you surprised me.”

“Me?” Angie chuckled, eyes wide as she looked Peggy over. “You’re the surprise!” She let her voice drop, telling Peggy a secret she knew Steve could hear. “I mean, I was cast as Betty Carver, so I was a little disappointed when I heard I was getting dropped down to feature.”

Peggy watched Angie’s face fall when neither she nor Steve seemed to react to that. “I’m sorry, am I supposed to know who that is?” Peggy shrugged, trying to play it off as being dim. “We haven’t been given a script yet.”

Angie’s face went from disappointed to outraged. “You haven’t been…” Her mouth worked in disbelief as she looked between the two of them. “Who is your agent? We’ve all had the songs and script for weeks now!”

Peggy felt the sentence hit her like a punch in the gut: whatever Brandt had been planning, it had been going on for weeks, not days. Though they’d both known this couldn’t have been put together in the last few days, the realization that there was already a plan to center around some ultra-strong American hero bothered her deeply. She tried hard not to react to the plain panic in Steve’s eyes while Angie’s face was still on her. She made a snap decision, and decided the more honest they were, the better. “Agent? Why- the US Army, of course!”

Angie laughed, brushing Peggy’s comment away with her hand. “You’re funny! No- come on- tell me so we can help you guys get it all straightened out!” Angie’s smile faded as she watched Peggy’s straight face barely move. “Wait- you’re- you’re serious.”

“Yes.”

“But- this… this is a show. Why would the Army…” She looked between the two of them, truly confused.

Steve cleared his throat and stepped in. “There, uh, was an accident.” He looked down, and kept his eyes averted in a way that Peggy knew meant he was uncomfortable with what he was doing. “I couldn’t serve the way I wanted to, and some of the higher ups thought that this might be the best place for me.”

Peggy watched Angie’s face as she shifted uncomfortably. The young woman clearly hadn’t been prepared for what she thought was an injured veteran before her. Peggy reached out and took Steve’s hand, letting her thumb rub over the knuckle. “We’re very lucky to be here right now,” she nearly whispered, proud of how he’d managed to play his role.

“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!” Angie, for her part, was now mortified, hands covering her mouth as she looked at the two of them. “You’re… wait- are you really married, too? I thought I just got re-cast!”

“What?” Peggy’s head swung around quickly.

“Betty Carver was supposed to be the love interest- the home front girlfriend of Captain America.” She rolled her eyes, talking out loud to herself. “I mean, I was thrown for a loop when I came over here and you were English! Couldn’t figure out why they’d recast the home front girl with an English gal, but…” She softened and turned, smiling genuinely. “Well, I guess it all makes a lot more sense, now.” She looked over at Steve. “You were really a soldier?”

He nodded, and Peggy pushed forward with the charade, skirting the line of reality as close as she could. “It’s how we met.”

Angie’s smile melted even further. “That’s so sweet. I wish I had a guy to write.” She shrugged, and switched gears quickly. “So, wait- you mean you’re really fresh out of the Army, no script or nothin’?”

“Nothin,” Steve confirmed.

“Well, you stick with me. I’ll show you the ropes, introduce you to everyone. Most of us have been taking gigs together for years now. After a while rehearsing and once we’re on the road we’ll be one big family.”

~*~

“I can sleep on the floor,” Steve said warmly, feeling gallant as he took a pillow from the bed even though he was drained from the way Angie had dragged them around the dining room, introducing them to nearly the entire cast.

Peggy pulled it from his hands and tossed it back on the bed. “Absolutely not.” Steve only knitted his brow at her. “The windows face the other side of the hotel. Even with the curtains drawn you can still see shapes. Plus, now that Angie’s introduced us around, I doubt she, or any of them really, will be too shy about stopping by. One overly nosy chorus girl sees you on the floor and starts talking and our cover is blown.”

Steve wasn’t convinced, and looked nervous now. “Still, I didn’t want to—"

“My modesty will survive if yours will.” She set her hands on her hips and looked at him, finding herself tired and frustrated after the afternoon they’d had. “One overly eager bell boy or maid comes in and finds you out of the bed, and we’re in the gossip mill. One wrong word to the wrong person, and this all goes south, you know that.”

He grabbed the pillow back from the bed, just as obstinate. “I don’t sleep that much anyway, it won’t bother me, Peg.”

Peggy shook her head, closing the tiny amount of space between them. “You and me, together against the world, right? But let’s get one thing straight, shall we? My official mission is to make sure you don’t get killed. If you die, I’ve failed,” she paused and smiled proudly, “and I never fail. Even more so than that,” she sighed, her eyes turning softer, “I’m quite fond of you, and I would very much appreciate you not dying.”

“Fond?” Steve nearly squeaked out.

Peggy smiled. Perhaps they’d been dancing about this too much, because his shock, after everything they’d said to each other this afternoon, was not the response she expected to her words. “Yes. Fond. So much so, in fact, that I might even let you take me on a date once this is all over.”

Steve flustered, surprised as he stuttered out, “D-date?” He cleared his throat and composed himself, nodding and looking anywhere but at her. “I mean, yeah. No. I’d love to take you out.” He took a breath and slowed himself down. “I’m… fond, too.”

Peggy smiled, turning her back, ignoring that he turned a deep shade of red. “Affection aside, we need to be comfortable with one another in public for strategic purposes: holding hands, casual touches, even kissing.” He’d very nearly gotten himself under control when she said that and she could see how hard he fought to keep his face from turning red again as she pulled the pillow from his hand, gentler this time. “When people see us, they need to believe we’re a couple, no matter if we love one another or can’t stand each other. Understood?”

He nodded swiftly.

She tossed the pillow down. “Now get in bed.”

He stared blankly at her for a second before sitting on the side of the bed, still fully dressed. “Did you… want to go to bed?” He asked cautiously.

She huffed, sitting heavily next to him. “No,” she admitted. “We need to talk this through. We can’t afford to get the details messed up. We came close a few times today already.”

Steve nodded. “I know. I tried to keep it as close to what really happened as I could, so we couldn’t mess it up, but—”

“No, that was good.” Peggy kicked off her heels and slid back on the bed, tucking her legs under her. “The closer we keep it to reality, the less details we have to remember. But the timeline is off. It’ll be what gets us caught.”

“Because according to the papers we were married before we even met.”

“Exactly.” She nibbled at her thumbnail, turning away to think. “And you were on the European Front. We need to figure out just exactly what your accident was, once these people get comfortable with us—”

“Angie’s already quite comfortable,” Steve mumbled.

Peggy hummed in agreement before continuing, “Once they get more comfortable, they’re not going to hold their questions for long. And it isn’t as if you’ve got anything overtly wrong that would take you off the front lines.”

Steve nodded. “They’re keeping every able-bodied soldier out there. It’s gotta be convincing.”

“Well, we should be able to fend off questions at least for a bit.” Peggy shifted, looking him over seriously.

Steve squirmed under her gaze. “What?”

“Just thinking,” she sighed, forcing her eyes to his. “If you were in your old body, we’d have no trouble passing you off as discharged.”

His laugh was somewhat self-deprecating. “If I were in my old body we wouldn’t be here.”

Peggy looked him over again, her eyes very pointedly popping up from the bed they were both sitting on once her gaze rested there. “Oh, I don’t know about that.”

His jaw fell, more out of surprise than anything, and he was even more surprised to see a bright red tint start to shade in around Peggy’s cheeks. She cleared her throat and looked away. “Goodness only knows how people get places, yes?” she asked quickly, pushing through the heavy seriousness that had fallen over them both. She stood, pacing with newfound energy as she tried to halt the images of just what they could do in a bed together. “What if you were in your old body? What could we say was the reason?”

Steve switched trains of thought with her easily, shrugging and curling over, so reminiscent of the frail boned boy he’d once been. “Gosh, take your pick. I’ll start with the A’s: anemia, asthma, angina, all kinds a’ scrawny… then there’s the scoliosis, high blood pressure, constant sinus infections. I had scarlet fever, then rheumatic fever…. Nothing ever felt the same after that.” He almost jumped when he looked up to see she’d managed to creep so close to him that she was leaning in only inches away from his face, staring, fascinated. “What?”

The amazed look on her face never faltered. “How did you ever manage Basic Training?”

He laughed nervously, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he shrugged. “You were there. You know I barely made it through most of the time.”

Her amazement shifted to pride. “Sheer force of will, I imagine, was the only thing between you and collapsing on that field.”

“Probably more often than you’d know.”

Peggy stood slowly and resumed her pacing. “Asthma would work.”

“They catch that right away. No hiding it. I never would have made it past the recruitment center. In fact, there were five times I didn’t.” She hummed, leaning back on her trunk, still looking him over. Steve tried no to hide from her intense gaze. “You know, that’s getting a little…”

Peggy turned her eyes down, shaking her head. “Sorry. Can’t help it.” She looked back up and smiled. “Seems Erskin’s serum worked a bit too well.”

~*~

Peggy stepped out of the bathroom, pin curls hidden under her kerchief, face scrubbed clean with just a light sheen of moisturizer on, her robe covering the only nightgown she had. She smiled when she saw Steve’s back, his face turned carefully away as he sat on his side of the bed. “You can look, you know.”

“I, uh,” as he cleared his throat she could see the pink creeping up his neck, “I didn’t want to presume.”

“I’m sorry to say that there’s nothing scandalous about me without my make-up or with my hair pinned for the night.” She carefully sat on her side of the bed, smiling as his shoulders tensed when he felt the mattress move. “Though I am in a nightgown, I wasn’t allowed to keep the army-issued pajamas.” He slowly turned, looking over, relaxing a little once he saw her. “What?” She chuckled, “Was that all that bad?”

“I just… I didn’t want to presume…”

“You said that already,” she smiled, unable to see anything else but the stammering 98-pound man across from her in the back of the car.

“I know, but it seemed…” he huffed, shrugging.

“You’re not scandalized?” she teased.

He smiled softly. “You look like my Ma.” Her eyes widened and he threw his hands up, rushing to explain. “No, I just, I thought you’d be- I don’t know, more- but not like- no, and then I turned and you were just- normal.” His hands started flying and his eyes darted back and forth as he panicked, words spilling from his lips that didn’t make any of his stuttering confessions better. “But no, not like that. Not normal. You’re pretty. I just assumed you’d be more since I imagined—not that I want more, you’re enough. But I saw you like that with the kerchief and that was just how my Ma used to do her hair and—” His eyes widened comically large, “No! I do not think of my Ma like that. Not that I did or would, but I thought of you like that—”

“You have?” she interrupted, completely amused and charmed at his stammering.

“I have!” He announced, proud, before he realized what he’d said, his face falling again and the stammering resuming. “No, it’s just that, I respect you. A lot. And you’re gorgeous. And we are married, but not for real so then I shouldn’t—”

“Steve!” Peggy smiled, put a hand on his. “Breathe!” He stopped his disjointed rant, looking at her and finally taking a deep breath in, eyes wild with pleading for understanding. “It’s alright. I understand what you’re trying to say.”

“Good,” he chuckled, turning more completely to her, “because I sure don’t.”

Peggy laughed lightly, taking her hands from his. “I believe I have an unfair advantage here as I’ve already seen you without your shirt, and ladies do tend to have quite a few tricks up their sleeves.”

He looked sheepish, swinging his pajama clad legs on the bed, eyes focused on his threadbare undershirt. “I’ve heard fellas say that they’ve seen their girls without make-up and their hair done and they look completely different. Made them not want to date them.”

Peggy shrugged her robe off, setting it on the chair next to the bed. Her nightgown wasn’t exactly revealing, she had dresses with lower necklines, but it was thinned from use and age and she didn’t have another. His eyes traveled her form, and she pretended not to notice as she pulled down the blanket and slipped into the bed. “And do I?”

“No.” He smiled, turning away to click off the lamp to hide his expression. “You’re…” he looked down, trying to pick his words carefully, “just as beautiful.”

Peggy bit her lip, unsure of how to respond as he slipped in the bed, the pillow between them separating their sides. “That’s a kind assessment,” she finally whispered into the darkness.

“It’s the truth,” he whispered back. “Good night, Peggy,” he added gently, looking over the pillow that separated them, the compromise they’d made to keep him off the floor and somehow save her virtue.

“Good night, Steve,” she whispered back, completely sure she’d have quite the difficult time sleeping now that she knew that unlike Fred, he didn’t seem to mind her as she looked not so done up.