justtogetthrough · 2 years ago
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Today I went outside and it extra smelled like ~farm~ and it was this surreal moment where I felt like a character from the show I just watched, having to escape to a new place to get away from all the fucked up shit that was causing trouble.
I walked out to grab my garbage can, looking at the farms around me and thinking about how I’ve never lived in the country before, and how my ex is the reason I’m here. I literally had to leave the place that once felt like home and start a new life over in a new place and it’s all so different and it’s… hard. To go from the lifestyle I had before, to this.
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yourmidnightlover · 8 months ago
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the sun
pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader
summary: after the events of the snap, you find out news that's both heart wrenching and warming. what happens five years later when bucky's back?
warnings: death, mourning, pregnancy, childbirth, canon-typical violence (not much but just adding to cover all the bases), loosely based on end game and infinity war (as in ignore my mistakes lmaooo), if i failed to mention any warnings PLEASE LET ME KNOW!
wc: 2.6k
a/n: dude idk why i've had an urge to write such heart wrenching angst lately. i'm actually in a decent place rn. i tried to cut this fic down bc originally it was SOOOO long i felt like a lot of it was just filler and i feel like shorter fics of mine tend to do better... ANYWHO! this does have a happy/hopeful ending so no worries! also picturing this beefcake for this story is AGHHHHHHH!
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you never thought two lines on a stick could ever break your heart the way they did.
tears clouded your vision as you gripped the counter, trying not to crumble or succumb to your grief.
6 weeks ago, the avengers lost. everything.
half of the world, gone in a moment.
in one moment, your world collapsed. seeing bucky fade to dust right in front of you...
sobs wracked through your body as you crumbled to the ground.
this was supposed to be a happy moment. there should be tears of joy, not sobs of sorrow. your heart should feel full of love, not like there's a super-soldier sized hole in it.
"y/n," nat's voice rang outside the door, giving you a moment to yourself.
"just-," you tried to level your breathing before she opened the door, knowing but not understanding the grief you were feeling.
she wrapped her arms around your body, tucking your head into her neck as she gently rubbed your back soothingly. steve leaned against the bathroom door, glancing on the counter to see what they had all expected.
a positive pregnancy test.
you were having bucky's baby.
without bucky.
you gripped his dog tags that you had been wearing since the funeral. they were the only thing that could truly ground you.
they brought back happy memories of cuddling in bed, the cool metal shocking your skin for only a moment before realizing that it was only bucky and smiling at the memory.
god, it hadn't even been two months.
how were you supposed to do this alone?
"we're here for you," steve's voice called from the doorway, as if he could hear your thoughts. "you'll never be alone. not in this... not ever." he shook his head, his brows furrowed in a serious, straight line.
eventually, your sobs subsided. you stood with nat from your seat on the ground, wiping your own eyes mustering up a pathetic smile before she left you and steve to work out your grief together.
"we didn't even know it was possible," you shrugged. "it's like he sent me them..." you placed your hand on an invisible bump before facing steve, his teary eyes reminding you that he had lost his best friend, too. "he sent us this baby."
you reached your hand out for steve to hold. he took it gratefully and pulled you into his arms, hugging you tight and letting only a few tears slip his waterline before pulling back.
"if you'll let me, i want to be there for you for everything," his chin wobbled. "buck would kick my ass if i let you go through this alone." a genuine laugh left your lips for the first time in nearly two months.
"i would be so grateful for that," you nodded as you let go of his arms. "part of me still can't believe that it's real. it's like part of me still expects him to walk into the compound from a long mission or something..." you shook your head. "i know that sounds so stupid."
"it's not," he shook his head with a smile. "it's what i wish was true, maybe it's your subconscious trying to preserve your mind?"
"maybe," you shrugged before continuing, "i should probably talk to tony and bruce, huh?"
-
you knew you were around eight weeks along.
according to the doctors' tony had enlisted, however, you were already 12 weeks along, which was impossible.
bucky had been gone on a mission at that time... but it's whatever. you got to hear the heartbeat. steve went with you, too. you both bawled together. you kept three copies of the ultrasound and he kept two.
banner had already offered to do some testing on the dna of the baby, noting that the serum would likely affect the pregnancy (as it probably already has).
you had talked to tony about retiring from the whole superhero gig for the time being. you needed to mourn and prepare for a new life simultaneously. tony had promised to provide anything you needed at the drop of a hat, and he sure as hell delivered.
within no time, your pregnancy was being measured at 20 weeks while only being pregnant for 12. banner was concerned for your body's ability to keep up with the rapid rate of growth of the baby. he had you on a strict, hefty diet with two different prenatal vitamins in attempt to help your nutrition.
in spite of your best efforts, you were always exhausted and in pain. but you wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. this was bucky's baby. you didn't care how much pain you went through when you had half of him growing inside of you.
you couldn't walk for long without feeling like passing out, which banner chalked up to low iron. steve had grown progressively more worried for you and the baby the longer the pregnancy went on.
as a result, he had moved into the spare room that was in your and bucky's house. truly, it just made it easier for him to help you finish up the nursery anyway.
he was very handy about it all, painting, building furniture from scratch, the whole deal.
"i've been thinking... and if it's a girl, i want to name her evangeline james barnes," you informed steve as you ate the steak he had been making for the past few weeks of your pregnancy, as ordered by dr. banner. that with carrots, broccoli, potatoes, and for dessert strawberries, blueberries and raspberries over ice cream. "and if it's a boy, cyrus james barnes. evangeline means good news, and cyrus means sun."
steve placed his hand over yours, "i think buck would've loved them." he smiled warmly as you downed the food in a few minutes.
you had begun showing soon after you found out you were pregnant, but now, it felt like it was impossible to hide. nat had been wonderful about helping you keep up with the changes your body was going through, getting you new maternity clothes every week.
she even made sure to get you every single craving that wasn't in accordance to banner's hefty diet. not that he didn't want you to eat more, he thought it was best you did! but he also wanted to make sure that with all that you did eat, your body got as many nutrients as possible.
just to be safe, he kept you on other vitamin supplements anyway.
you couldn't help but imagine what bucky would say or do about everything now.
he would hold your body closely, pressing firm kisses to your bump every chance he could get while whispering some sickly sweet sayings to your unborn child, words that would melt the winter soldier's cold exterior.
he would whisper words of encouragement any moment you felt worried about your abilities to be a mom. he would say how beautiful you were, in spite of being bloated in places you didn't know could bloat.
he would be wonderful, and in your mind, he was still alive and vibrant. well, as vibrant as bucky ever was, at least.
truthfully, that's the only way you were able to keep going on like this. steve was wonderful, but you couldn't help but want the love of your life by your side as you tried to navigate this new chapter.
in a couple more weeks, you were projected to be at 32 weeks. bruce and tony were talking with your doctors about the safety of inducing so early, both for you and the baby.
oh, and you wanted the gender to be a surprise.
and within the week, you were having your baby.
steve and nat were by your side during the birth, whispering encouraging words and compliments of your strength.
"i need him!" you screamed in pain as you held one of each of their hands, sobbing in agony. "i need james! i need my bucky! i can't do this alone, i can't-i can't!"
"you can," nat reminded you. "this baby needs you," she held your face to look at hers. "bucky is a part of this baby." you swore you could see tears in her eyes before turning to face steve.
"remember what you told me when you found out you were pregnant?" he didn't bother wiping the tears from his face. "bucky sent you-sent us this baby. he knows you can do it." you sniffled before nodding at your two best friends, pushing with one last scream and a second later, you had...
"cyrus james barnes," the nurse called to you. "it's a boy, congratulations mom."
-
the next few years went by quicker than you could've ever imagined.
crawling, first words, first steps...
you missed bucky. not a day passed where you didn't miss him.
but, having cy helped a lot. he looked just like his father. dark brown hair, icy blue eyes, a cute little nose... not to mention his father's stubbornness.
you made sure he knew who his father was. you took him to the museum often, showing him the statue of his father and his background in the world war, him saving the world so much. you told him how you fell in love with him.
how you fell for the quiet man before ever really talking to him. how you were partners on a long-term, undercover mission and that's where your love ignited from the sparks.
not that cy understood any of what you told him. you just felt it was important to know that his parents loved him, and each other dearly.
you never took off his dog tags, either.
steve was a huge help the whole time. he kept working for the avengers, so he was gone often, but he provided a good male role model for cyrus. after all, he was his uncle steve. he already taught him how to throw a ball, albeit a little softball, but it counts!
you made sure to document everything that went on in yours and cyrus's life.
banner had said that cyrus was growing at an exceeding rate, but nothing to be concerned about. in fact, cyrus was turning five in almost half a year, meaning the anniversary of bucky's death, or disappearance or whatever you called it, was coming up.
then, you got a call from tony and banner.
it all happened so quickly, from testing to planning to the execution. pepper watched cyrus for you while you went back with steve, scott, and tony to get the tesseract.
of course, the men being men had to come upon a few hiccups, but eventually, after going as far back as the 70s, you brought back the tesseract.
the only thing is that nat never came back...
next thing you know, bruce is snapping his fingers and clint is getting a call from his supposedly deceased wife. your eyes fill with tears, hands searching in your pockets for your phone to see if you've gotten anything yet.
is it possible he wasn't brought back? he was the first to... disintegrate. die. maybe that meant something in the eyes of the stones?
then, you felt a buzz in your hand.
although, you didn't have any time to try to grasp what that meant, because more aliens came to earth.
shocker.
after yet another war, one that you weren't even prepared for, after losing more people, again. after losing tony...
but amidst the chaos of the aftermath of the fight, with screams of joy and shock and grief surrounding you, tears streaming down your face, your eyes met the blue ones you only saw in your son.
he slowly walked towards you as the tears sped up. you didn't even realize when your feet began running towards him.
when his arms wrapped around your waist, you finally felt the home you thought you had come to terms with never feeling again. your arms wrapped around his neck, your face buried in his shoulder as you breathed in the scent of gunmetal that had overtaken him in the battle.
"oh my god," you cried into the leather of his jacket. he lifted you off the ground, your legs wrapping around his waist as you felt his smile on your cheek. "i can't believe you're really here."
"i'm here, doll," his hands cradled your head so tenderly. "i'm not ever leaving again. never."
you pulled back before your eyes widened in realization. "you've gotta meet someone, jamie."
his brows furrowed in confusion, just smiling and nodding along with whatever you said.
within the next few hours, simply being held by bucky before steve stole him away with a hug, you finally brought him home.
"so, steve moved in," you started as you pulled your car into the driveway, turning to see bucky looking at you with an incredulous look. "you'll see why." you reached to hold his hand before he brought yours to his lips, pressing a kiss there.
you told him to wait in the car as you went inside to relieve the babysitter for cyrus. after giving him some cash, he went outside, knocking on your car window to let bucky know he should make his way inside.
upon entering, he saw you sitting on the floor with a little boy with striking blue eyes that seemed so familiar to him. his nose, too. his lips though, they were all yours. he had a slight grin plastered on his lips, one that matched yours to a t.
"daddy?" suddenly, it all clicked.
his heart, his mind, his fucking soul, everything made sense now. the pain, hydra, the mind washing, the torture.
meeting you. falling in love. dying?
his son.
he started walking closer to bucky before the steady walk turned into a run. bucky knelt down, wrapping the boy in his arms, cradling his tiny frame in his arms protectively. his son.
"cyrus james barnes," you said with a teary smile on your face. bucky, without breaking the hug with his son, looked up at you with a smile that matched yours. "cyrus means 'sun', and i thought it was fitting. he brought me so much light and hope after you..." you choked up before he stood up with cy in his arms, walking towards you before wrapping you in the big, family hug.
"i love you so much, both of you."
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pandoa · 5 months ago
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eyes of your beholder
rook reassures you that you are still the most beautiful thing he has ever seen, no matter what your insecurities are
rook hunt x gender neutral! reader
requested by @yvonne67~✰
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“Rook… honest opinion���” your voice rang through the decently sized dorm room of a certain Pomefiore vice housewarden. With a hint of hesitation to your tone, you leaned your back against the young man’s pillows and bed as you turned to look at him from his spot seated in front of his desk.
“Do you think I’m… too loud whenever we’re together?” 
Rook, upon hearing the hesitance in your voice, immediately set down the pen and paper in his hands, giving you his full attention, “Hm? Whatever do you mean, mon amour?”
“You know… I am more on the rambunctious side when it comes to personality, and it doesn’t help that my image doesn’t really correlate much with the standards Pomefiore builds as a dorm. People talk, you know. I’m not oblivious to their stares and whispers… I’m also more average when it comes to my looks so…” your sentence trailed off as you avoided the way Rook had been looking at you at that moment. Almost as if he were studying you with each sentence you said.
“You’re beautiful through and through, (Y/n),” he answered back with a sure expression, “But… Why do you ask?”
“It’s nothing—”
“It is never nothing, (Y/n).” Rook took a small step towards you, gently grasping your hands as the emerald of his eyes bore into you as if he were gazing through a crystal window to your thoughts. He held your hands delicately, voice now soft and whispering, “Mon ange, please tell me what is going through that radiant mind of yours.”
At that, his words were enough to make you feel as if you were about to crumble. Crumble into a pathetic pile of dust, dirt, and envy which gnawed at your conscience as your true intentions shone past the defenses you placed moments before. Your defenses collapsed all at once with a single utterance from the man in front of you, and he could see you clearer than ever by now. The imperfections and clouded insecurities. The damaged self-confidence and unease. 
He knew what made your mind spiral and twist and turn. What caused that heavy pit in your stomach whenever you would catch yourself glancing at another student at Pomefiore, gaze lingering a little longer than what was socially acceptable as a mere accident. He knew… yet he still hoped that you would be the one who told him directly.
This man… is too observant for his own good, you thought to yourself as you noticed Rook beginning to gently rub his thumb over your hands in a comforting motion, sending a warm flutter through your senses at the reassuring action.
“I just… I was just wondering if there was something that—” you paused for a split second as you pieced together your thoughts prudently, “—That I could perhaps fix about myself. To meet the kind of standards you all set for both yourself and the people around you. Just to, you know, maybe fit the part as your significant other a little better. That’s all.”
“Fit the part?” Rook repeated in disbelief, “Mon ange, you have nothing you need to be proving to others in order for—”
You glanced back up at him with a firm disposition, your stance unwavering and disbelieving in his words, “But there is, Rook. There is.”
“I can assure you there is not,” Rook smiled with a gentle curve to his lips as he took your hands he’d already been holding and guided you off of the sinking mattress of his dorm room, leading you somewhere away from his bed. “Come with me.”
“Where?” you asked as you reluctantly sat up and practically let him pull you to your feet. You had no idea what the huntsman had planned for you this time, yet you still gave into his wishes as he supported your form once you stood up. Albeit, with at least half as much enthusiasm compared to him—but still.
“Just trust me,” Rook’s smile slowly formed into a grin as you both began walking across his dorm room. Passing by the wooden furniture of his desk beside his bed, treading through the soft texture of his white, polka-dotted rug, and past the neatly hung bows and arrows in his room, you and Rook made your way on your short journey and into the familiar doors of—
… The bathroom?
“Now, mon trésor, what do you see?” Rook asked as he guided your shoulders and had you face both of your reflections into the dorm’s gold-accented looking glass with Rook standing slightly behind you.
“The mirror,” you answered back dryly.
“Be serious.”
A sigh escaped your mouth at his insistence for an answer, “Myself…”
“C’est exact! It’s you,” the hunter grinned as he gave you a small applause, glancing at you through the mirror, “And what else do you see in the mirror?”
“I see you.”
“Correct again. I see you, and you see me. A beautiful exchange, don’t you think?” “Rook, what’s the point in all of this—” You tried turning around to face the young man, only for him to promptly grasp your shoulders again and turn your frame to face the looking glass once more.
“And like this beautiful exchange, because you, mon ange, are my beloved partner and lover, we get to see, discover, and adore the things that make us the individuals we are today. To love someone is to see them…” Rook tenderly took hold of your hand again, reaching from his place behind you to grasp it as his voice was laced with an ardent urgency to tell you these words. His eyes bore into your heart as his ability to see things beyond the surface spoke to you in gentle touches and confessions of adoration. 
Then, after Rook had ensured that you were listening to every word, every syllable, and every consonant he uttered, he continued.
“...And I see you each and every second of the day, (Y/n). The world can say what it wants, your mind can continue feeding whatever worries which flood your mind so often, yet absolutely nothing will go so far as to blind me and prevent me from seeing the enchanting parts of you which I so adore.
There is nothing you need to do or change in order to be deserving of the love which I give to you freely. No superficial standard, no judgemental comment, no part you have to play… Nothing.”
“I only want you. Nothing else.” 
Rook finishes his passion-filled explanation, allowing more time for you to take in all that he said and let it imprint itself into both your mind and heart. You watched as Rook’s reflection in the mirror had diverted his gaze from the looking glass and onto you, seeing through you again and again in ways you could not even comprehend. It was almost unfair how he was able to reach you in the deepest depths of your mind. Never giving up on you whenever these waves and storms of emotions struck you. It was almost unfair how he pulled you out of these storms each time, piecing you back together like a beautifully broken piece of artwork.
“Now, if that fact alone still does not satisfy you,” the huntsman then continued as his voice held a much more lighthearted tone to it, “then I will gladly go through every detail about you which I oh so adore, as I have previously mentioned. And once I name each and everything, I will then give an even more detailed reasoning for why I love those parts of you, starting with your eyes, lips, face, nose, cheeks—”
You shook your head hastily, not wanting for him to over do his affirmations, “No, Rook, that isn’t very necess—”
“—eyebrows, eyelashes, waist, legs, voice—”
“Rook, wait—”
“—the little beauty marks and stray marks which decorate your skin, your scars, your hair no matter where it is—” He powered on despite your objections.
“It’s okay, really—”
“—the way your lips shift into a certain expression when you’re thinking, the way your arms never fail to bend at a one hundred thirty-seven degree angle every single time you pull me into one of your spell-binging embraces, the way you—”
Oh, Sevens. You have the dear hunter going off on a tangent now.
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a/n: i really pulled out a protractor to try and measure the exact angle my arm would bend hugging a hypothetical rook hunt
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heavenlyhischier · 5 months ago
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𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐅𝐨𝐮𝐫
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word count: 12k words
summary: One night changes your relationship with Nico, and just when you think it was exactly what you wished for, you go back home feeling even more confused than you ever had before.
warnings: poorly translated german, cursing, drinking, kissing in a storage closet, angst (of course), Minors DNI 18+ themes below the cut; smut, unprotected sex, also nico is a major major idiot at the end
note: thank you everyone for your patience. i know it's taken me forever to get this out but it's here! this is slightly unedited (i tried) so please excuse any mistakes ahaha
series masterlist | prev part
When you woke up the next morning, memories of what had occurred merely a few hours ago instantly flooded your mind nearly making you dizzy. The feeling of his fingertips pressed into your hips, of his lips on yours, on your neck, singed your skin like it was happening all over again. You were entirely expecting to wake up to find out that it was really a dream, but not even you could make up the feeling of electricity that shocked your body when he kissed you. There was no imagining that.
Charlie had her leg thrown over your own, making slipping out undetected a challenge, but you deemed yourself successful when your feet were planted on the ground and all she did was tightly wrap herself up in the blanket. You carefully tiptoed out of the guest room, making sure to stay quiet in case the others were still sleeping, as you went in the correct direction to the bathroom. However, when you’re outside the door, Luca walks out and nearly sends you toppling onto the floor when you collide with him.
He quickly grabs onto your elbows, keeping your body upright as a quiet chuckle passes through his lips. Your body heats up in embarrassment, your eyes staying trained on his chest as you step away from him once you’re steady on your feet. You awkwardly shuffle on your feet, waiting for Luca to move away from the door so you can step inside to brush your teeth, but you can feel his eyes linger on you for a moment longer than you thought necessary.
“All yours,” Luca finally says, an amused hint to his voice, before he walks around you, “Nice hickey, by the way.”
Your head snaps towards him, eyes wide and mortified as he disappears back into his room without another word or another glance in your direction. You quickly rush into the bathroom, flipping the light switch on and leaning towards the mirror as your eyes explore the expanse of your neck. Sure enough, there was a decent-sized bruise slapped on the skin just above your collarbone. You covered it with your hand, panic filling your veins as you tried to figure out just exactly how you were going to hide that from his entire family.
The three of you hadn’t initially planned on staying overnight, and the only clothing you had brought with you was the dress you had shown up in. Your entire clavicle was exposed in said dress, and Charlie’s shirt was just as, if not more, revealing, so switching with her would be useless. The idea of someone else seeing the mark on your neck made you want to vomit in sheer humiliation, so you quickly brushed your teeth and filtered out of the bathroom before anyone else could see you.
Instead of walking back to the guest room, you stand outside the door of the person responsible and quickly rap your knuckles against the wood. You can hear his faint voice, and you hope that he said come in because that’s exactly what you did. You rushed into his room, closing the door behind you as you stood in the doorway, your shoulders heaving as you tried to calm your uneven breathing. Nico’s gaze lands on you, eyebrows furrowing in confusion when he takes in your disheveled appearance, but then he sees it. 
He can’t help but let out a laugh as you walk towards him, your voice worried and strained as you speak, “It isn’t funny, Nico! I can’t go out in front of your family like this.”
He can see the genuine panic in your eyes, and a part of him feels bad for accidentally bruising your neck. He knows his family is likely to see it, but he also knows they wouldn’t say anything to make you uncomfortable. They wouldn’t think any differently of you either, and he knows that’s going through your mind. He can see the distress written in the way your brows are furrowed and the way your shoulders are nearly to your ears, and he knows he needs to find a solution to ease your blooming anxiety.
“I know, I’m sorry,” He says, his voice soft and careful as his fingers twitch towards you, “You can borrow one of my shirts and ask Charlie if you can borrow the pants she brought. She can wear your dress.”
“Yeah, because that won’t be suspicious,” You groaned, letting your head fall backward in frustration as your hands ball into fists at your side.
“It won’t be,” He chuckles as he steps towards you, his eyes soft as he hesitantly takes your hands in his own. He carefully separates your fingers from your palm, his thumb delicately rubbing the skin as he continues,  “Just tell them you didn’t want to wear the dress back because it was uncomfortable. Problem solved.”
The air around the two of you was thick with a mixture of emotions that slightly overwhelmed you. You knew what happened last night was going to shift things with Nico, but now that the adrenaline rush from then had come and gone, you were back to being nervous around him. His touch made the hair on the back of your neck stand up, your eyes wide and impressionable as your mind drifted towards the same insecurities from only hours ago.
“Okay,” You eventually breathe out, forcing yourself to step away and pull your arms back to your body before your doubts become too overbearing, “If you think it’ll work.”
His face twisted in confliction as he watched you retreat into yourself the same way you had done last night. He could tell that you were slightly pulling away from him in fear. Of what? Nico wasn’t entirely sure, but he knew he needed to find out before you managed to convince yourself that whatever you were thinking was rooted in truth. However, he knew that, unfortunately, now wasn’t the best time for that and he was going to have to wait until the two of you were alone again. 
You went back to the guest room shortly after, Nico’s old hockey shirt in hand, to see Charlie now wide awake and sitting on the edge of the bed. Her eyes instantly darted towards the fabric between your fingers before landing on your neck. She harshly slapped the spot next to her with a slight smirk on her face even though she had already put the pieces together. After you had recounted the events from last night, and she relentlessly teased you for the mark near your neck, you slipped her jeans and Nico’s t-shirt on before going downstairs for breakfast.
Only his parents and sister were in the kitchen, and they all three gently pushed you away when you asked if you could do anything to help. Nina only gave your new outfit a passing glance before she went back to finish helping her parents prepare breakfast, leaving you to sit in the living room as you waited. Luca was the second one to come down, the two of you sharing brief eye contact before you bashfully snapped your gaze away from him.
“Nice shirt,” He teases, his voice thick with amusement as he sits in the chair.
“Aufhören, Luca,” You heard Nico call out from behind you, his tone holding a slight sense of warning towards his older brother as he reached the bottom of the stairs. (Stop)
You glanced towards him to see a reassuring smile on his face as he fell into the spot next to you, the cushion dipping with his weight. He could still see a slight sense of apprehension on your face, but he wanted you to know he meant everything he had said last night without saying it so openly in front of his family. Although, if he knew that would have been something you would want, he would do it, but he knew you better than that. Having that much attention on you was only going to cause more harm than good.
For now, he was going to do his best to drop the most subtle, yet not subtle at all, hints he can. He throws his arm over the cushion behind you before shifting in his spot, his thigh pressing against your own with only the most minimal amount of space between your sides. A wave of nerves wash over you as you divert your eyes to your hands that were clasped in your lap, your heart thudding in your chest as the two of them continue.
“I’m only joking,”  He brushes off, slightly shaking his head, “Maybe now I won’t have to listen to you complain about ho–”
“Okay,” Nico’s voice smothering Luca’s as his face flushed and he nervously cleared his throat, steering the conversation to a different topic, “Why don’t you go help in the kitchen?”
“Tried earlier,” He chuckles, “Mom said I’m still forbidden from cooking after last time.”
It wasn’t long after that Finn and Charlie joined the three of you in the main room, the conversation flowing naturally without any mention of the random change in clothing. Although, they both took notice to the closeness of you and Nico and passed you teasing, knowing smiles that you paid no mind to as you focused on the others. Eventually, Katja called for her sons to set the table once they were finishing up with the food, but all five of you stood to help with the small task.
Breakfast went by quickly, almost too quickly, and you already began to miss his family. While it had only been less than a day in their presence, they were nothing short of welcoming, kind, and caring. They were everything you already knew Nico to be, everything you had always admired about him, and you wished there were more people like them in the world. They never once made you feel like an outsider or like you didn’t belong, only ever treating you like you were family despite having just met. Though, if you were to ask, they would tell you it felt like they had known you for years with how often Nico spoke about you.
When it was time for the three of you to head back to the train station, his mom hugged you tightly and mumbled something you didn’t quite understand in your ear. Judging by the way Nico’s face got redder and Nina had to stifle her own laugh, you could form an idea as to what was said. You chose not to focus on it too much, moving to bid goodbye to the rest of the Hischier family, Finn included, minus Luca who was driving you back to the station.
“You will have to come back soon,” Katja called out as the four of you gathered by the door, a gentle smile on her face, “You will always have a room here.”
“Nächstes mal braucht sie ihre eigene nicht,” Finn teased as he playfully raises his eyebrows at both you and Nico. (Next time she won’t need her own.)
Your eyes flicked towards Nico, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion because you didn’t recognize any of the words he had said. He let out a soft chuckle and shook his head, mumbling something along the lines of ‘not important’ before he ushered you and Charlie out of the house. Luca follows suit, a mixture of voices calling out final goodbyes right up until the door is shut behind you.
The entire ride back to the train station was full of all four of you discussing plans for your last day in Switzerland. Luca had suggested that the four of you, Nina, and Finn plus a few others go out to a club in Bern, but Nico was quick to suggest that you do that the night before because you had a nine-hour flight the next day and doing that trip hungover wasn’t the best idea. By the time everyone was in agreement, though it didn’t take much effort to get there, Luca was pulling into the parking lot. 
Your goodbye with him, while still meaningful, was more playful and mischievous in a way that made you realize you missed Jack more than you had initially thought. Nico had already bought your tickets online, rebuffing any idea of you paying him back for them as he led you through the crowd of people. You heard Charlie’s quiet whisper of an idea for repayment, but you paid her no mind and did your best to keep the blush from crawling onto your cheeks as you walked slightly behind Nico.
On the train, it was you who had made the decision to sit across from Charlie rather than beside her, which did not go unnoticed by either her nor Nico. He couldn’t stop the small smile from forming on his face as he gracefully took the seat next to you, both of you ignoring the teasing gaze of the girl across from you. You were so focused on staring out the window, trying to conceal your flushed cheeks, that you missed the way Nico’s eyes lingered on you far longer than what would be considered normal, but Charlie didn’t. She never did.
By the time the three of you were finally back at Nico’s apartment, he had to leave almost as soon as you walked through the door. He had nearly forgotten about the training session he was scheduled to attend until he received a text from one of the guys he was going with. Before he left, he had mentioned something about going out for dinner this evening if you and Charlie were okay with that, but otherwise, he had nothing else in mind.
You and Charlie had decided to stay at the apartment and lounge around for the day since you hadn’t really taken any time to relax during the entire duration of your trip. You sat on the couch, flipping through Nico’s Netflix account before deciding on some random romantic comedy you had both seen a dozen times. Though neither of you made it through half of the movie before you were sound asleep.
The sound of someone down the hall from the apartment slamming their door startled you awake, your body jolting upwards as you tried to rid yourself of the fog clouding your head. There was now a random movie playing on the screen and Charlie was still sprawled on the other end with her mouth slightly dropped open and soft snores passing through her lips. You carefully reached for the remote that was tucked underneath her side to turn the TV off before you picked up your phone to check the time.
You had two missed texts from Nico letting you know that his session was running a bit longer than usual, but he would be back before six in the evening and that he had made the reservation for seven. You also had a string of texts from Jack who was updating you on the antics you were missing at the lake house, telling you that everyone missed you, and how he was waiting for you to get there so he could finally win at beer pong. A small, amused smile formed on your face as you shook your head, texting him and asking if he would be busy in an hour so you could Facetime and tell him about how the trip was going.
His response was almost instant, and you couldn’t stop the guilt from creeping on you as Charlie’s words from the night before echoed in your mind. You hadn’t meant to make Jack feel like you were mad at him, but you truly didn’t think he would think much of the way you had slightly backed off. You knew how he felt about Charlie, and her about him, and you assumed that he would want to primarily talk to her and not hear repeats of the same adventures. A small part of you was also worried that maybe he wouldn’t be interested in talking to you at all anymore.
While Jack had always made it known with all of his girlfriends in the past that you were a permanent fixture in his life, the underlying feeling that you would be tossed to the side was always there. Of course, you knew Charlie would never be that kind of girl, especially given the fact that she valued her friendship with you over anything, the feeling still lingered. You never voiced it out loud because you knew it sounded stupid, and that is exactly what both of them would say to you if you did.
The decision to shower came easy once you glanced at the time and also realized you hadn’t showered since before you had left yesterday. You made a point to take your time and focus on getting everything done just in case there was a potential repeat of what happened last night. By the time you finished, the entire bathroom was full of steam and the walls were damp with condensation from how hot the water was.
Slipping out of the bathroom and into your temporary room, you made quick work to change into more comfortable clothes before blow-drying your hair. Once you were finished, you went back into the living room to wake Charlie up so she had plenty of time to shower and get ready before you left. She tried to brush you off, mumbling incoherent words as she buried her face in the cushions, but you didn’t let her. You knew she would sleep the rest of the day if she could.
After some gentle coaxing, you managed to get her off the couch and into the bathroom with her leaving a passing comment about how foggy the mirror still was. You retreated back into the room down the hall, making a spot in front of the mirror to finish styling your hair before you texted Jack and asked if now was a good time to Facetime, and not even ten seconds later your phone was ringing.
“You’re alive,” Jack cheerfully greets, a blinding grin on his face as he shuts the door to what you assume is his room, “Swiss life treating you well?”
You could hear the faint sound of the front door shutting followed by a quiet voice and footsteps down the hallway. The click of Nico’s door closing reaches your ears as you turn all your focus back on Jack, who is now lying on his bed with a smug look on his face. You ignore his look as you try to balance your phone on the makeshift stand you put together so you can talk while you get ready.
“Hey,” Jack suddenly yells, making your eyes widen in confusion as your arms retreat back to your sides, “That’s a hickey! Whose dirty mouth did you have on your neck?”
Your entire body stilled, embarrassment crawling against every inch of your skin as you stared at Jack, your jaw slack like you had been caught doing something unimaginable. His outward appearance was that of someone who was pretending to be disturbed with his narrowed eyes and scrunched nose, but his eyes were swimming with amusement as he awaited whatever excuse you managed to come up with.
“What are you talking about,” You chose to feign confusion, looking away from him as you looked into the mirror and tried to angle your body away from him, “I think it’s just a shadow.”
“No, I know what hickeys look like,” He draws your name out, sitting up as he brings his phone closer to his face, “I’ve given my fair share, and that, my friend, is a hickey. Who’s the lucky guy? You and Nico finally stop pretending like you don’t want to jump each other's bones and just get it on?”
Jack was mostly joking when he said that, mostly because he didn’t think either of you was going to be brave enough to make a move, especially not when Charlie was there. However, when you nearly choked on nothing but the air passing through your lips and he watched your face turn an entirely different shade, he knew what he said had some truth to it. 
“Oh, you so did,” His voice was strained as he spoke through his laughter, “You two boned!”
“No,” You rushed out, aggressively shaking your head as you scrambled to turn the volume down in case Nico could hear it, “We didn’t bone, Jack.”
“Not yet,” He sang, an even bigger grin on his face, “I’d put money on you two hooking up before you come back.”
“Oh my god! You’re so annoying,” You groaned, throwing your head back in slight humiliation, “You couldn’t have just pretended not to notice?”
He says nothing, instead meeting your gaze as he quirks his brow before both of you double over in laughter. Expecting Jack to not say something about something as obvious as a hickey was like expecting them to let Luke drive the boat; it was simply impossible. Once the two of you were able to catch your breath, to finally have a normal conversation, it felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. A weight that only a conversation with your closest friend could make disappear.
The next few days were full of adventure and excitement as Nico, along with Luca who was now back in Bern, took you and Charlie on hikes or to various different places around the city. While some hikes were more difficult than others, they allowed you to see some of the most beautiful creations of nature that you would never get back home. The busy schedule also allowed you to nearly forget the lurking insecurities that would gnaw at your heart anytime you were alone with Nico for even a second, but the way he kept subtly trying to bring it up didn’t.
When the evening before your last day in Switzerland came, Nico left his apartment to you, Charlie, and his sister to get ready while he and Finn left for his brothers. Music softly played in the background as the three of you told stories that incited laughter and comments that would make anyone who heard them blush. Nina gave helpful tips as to what one would typically wear to the kind of club you were going to, going as far as to bring extra clothes in case you didn’t feel like anything you had packed was suitable enough. 
Nina was helping fix your hair when she quietly says, “I was surprised there are no more hickeys to cover.”
Charlie’s laughter immediately fills the room as you let out a surprised gasp, looking up to glare at her in the mirror. Nina doesn’t meet your gaze, putting her focus on finishing what she was doing, but she has a coy smile on her face as she continues her work. Charlie, though, manages to catch your eye as walks towards the two of you, her laughter dying down.
“That’s because they haven’t been alone for longer than two minutes,” Charlie playfully teases, “Not for lack of trying on my part.”
“Oh, I’m sure that will change once he sees you tonight,” She snickers, “You look like, what you guys would call, a smokeshow.”
Nico and Luca arrived back at the apartment just as the three of you were finishing up, their loud voices echoing down the hall. You couldn’t help but let your eyes drift towards the mirror, dragging your gaze from the top of your head all the way down to your toes. Doubts and scrutinizing thoughts slowly crept their way in, your hands anxiously running across the thin fabric of your shirt as you began contemplating changing into something that you were more used to. Something that wasn’t so form-fitting. 
“Hey,” Charlie peaks her head back in the room, quickly taking notice of a look she had seen on your face far too often, “You okay?”
“Yeah,” You give her a tight-lipped smile before dropping your gaze to the floor.
You hear her footsteps approaching you, her arms wrapping around your shoulders as she says, “You look absolutely beautiful, okay? I mean that. You’re going to be the hottest girl in that club no matter what, but if you want to change, we can wait. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable the whole time.”
You meet her stare in the mirror, a soft, sincere smile on her face as she gently squeezes you in reassurance. You bring your hand up to grasp her forearm, tears lining your eyes as you let out a deep breath and rub your thumb against her skin. Small moments like these were times you appreciated Charlie more than anything. She was always your personal hypeman, but she was also always quick to remind you that you had a choice rather than talking you into doing something you didn't necessarily want to do.
“I’ll be okay,” You murmur, clearing your throat when your voice threatens to break.
“Are you absolutely sure,” She presses, subtly gesturing to your glassy eyes.
“I promise,” You nod, “I just appreciate you and it makes me emotional, okay? Give a girl a break!”
You and Charlie stay in the room a few minutes longer, allowing you to recollect yourself before going out in front of the others. With your shoes in hand, you follow her out and finally make your way into the main room to see the four of them seated at the table. Luca and Finn were the first ones to see you, Nico and Nina sitting with their backs facing you, and a small smirk was quick to form on their faces before looking towards the younger Swiss in front of them.
When Nico turned around, it felt like everything else, everyone else, had stilled and it was only the two of you in the room. Only you with your flushed cheeks and downcast eyes, and him with his slack jaw and captivated gaze. Your heart rams into your ribs as he drinks in every dip and curve of your body, almost like he was trying to commit the moment to memory, as you walked in front of him. He visibly swallows as you take the chair next to him and you give him a shy, passing smile; one he hastily returns with an unwavering, unblinking look.
“Does he do that when you guys go out at home,” Luca whispers, slightly leaning towards Charlie as she sits next to him.
“Every time,” Charlie hums, chuckling to herself, “He thinks no one notices, but everyone does. He is not very good at hiding it, but neither is she. They’ve just both been so oblivious it’s actually painful.”
“You look amazing,” Nico says, blissfully unaware of the teasing going on across from him.
“Thank you,” You bashfully mumble, turning your gaze to look at the wooden table in front of you. 
Luca mentioned that he had called a taxi a few moments prior, saying that they would call him when they had arrived, so the six of you spent the time waiting simply talking about whatever came to mind. The minutes were full of teasing and laughter so loud that the call from the taxi nearly went missed if it hadn’t been for Nina’s careful ears picking up on the sound. 
The taxi service had sent a van in order to accommodate the six of you, with you squishing in between Nico and Charlie in the back row, Nina and Finn in the two middle seats, and Luca riding as the passenger to the older driver. Charlie was taking as much space as she possibly could, forcing you into Nico’s side so harshly that he had to throw his arm around your shoulders to remain comfortable, which you knew to be her goal, anyway.
“Will there be a lot of people you know,” You ask, lightly gasping as Nico’s fingertips brushed against the exposed skin along your collarbone. Just above where he had left his mark a few days prior.
“A few,” He hums to himself as he thinks, slightly adjusting himself so you’re better slotted under his arm, “Timo, Jonas, and Nola will be there, so you’ll see a few familiar faces.”
“Yeah, Timo texted me earlier and told me he’d be there,” You lightly laughed, wringing your hands together as a way to help ease some of the nerves flowing through you.
You were so focused on staring out of the windshield that you missed the way Nico’s jaw slightly hardened at the mention of his friend and teammate texting you. While he knew that neither you nor Timo had any sort of romantic feelings for another, he couldn't help but let a slight sense of envy creep its way up his throat, rendering him mute as he set his narrowed eyes on the headrest in front of him.
When you arrived at the club, you still felt a little on edge as you stepped out of the van, especially given Nico’s random bout of silence, but you did your best to swallow the anxiety bubbling in your throat. The outside of the club looked just like any other you had visited before, and that helped slightly relax you as you gathered in the back of the queue to get inside. There were a few people in the line who gave Nico passing glances, which he returned with a kind smile if he noticed, but it was the girls who stared at him a little longer than you thought necessary that made a scowl form on your face.
The second you were inside, the music was pumping so loudly that you could feel it in your bones. People were pressed together as they danced, worryless and carefree looks on all of their faces as they enjoyed the moment. You could feel the subtle stickiness on the floor as you followed the others through the crowd, Charlie’s hand grasping your own as a precaution, but it was nothing compared to the tacky club tile back home. However, the section on a slightly raised platform with a couch and several chairs was not something you were used to.
“Do you want a drink,” Nico asked after he had introduced the two of you to everyone. He was leaning into you, his mouth near your ear as he talked over the music, his hand protectively placed on your lower back.
A wave of deja vu washed over you, the memory of Nico asking you almost the same exact question a few days prior quickly replaying in your mind. You shake your head, pushing the thoughts far away, as you look up at him, meeting his warm stare as you say, “I think I’m okay right now, but thank you.”
“I’ll be right back then,” He nods, his hand flexing against you as his gaze slightly shifts behind you, “Charlie, you want the usual?”
“Sure! Thank you,” She shouts.
Just as you were about to say something to her, you heard the sound of your name being called behind you. With wide, curious eyes you turn around to see Nola approaching with a bright smile on her face, her boyfriend trailing behind her. She instantly pulls you into a hug as soon as you’re within reach, comments about how good you looked spilling from her lips before she thought about letting you go. As she turned to Charlie, Jonas embraced you in a polite side hug before you fell into conversation about your trip so far.
“Are you going home when you leave,” Nola asks as Jonas wraps his arm around her.
“We’re going to Michigan actually,” You revealed, “I haven’t gone to the lake house this summer yet because I’ve been trying to prepare for the internship next semester, and Jack said if I didn’t go the second we get back, he was going to cut me off.”
“Of course he did,” She throws her head back in laughter, “Ever so dramatic, he is.”
“Are we talking about Jack,” Nico’s voice interrupts, diverting your gaze to him as he walks towards you with a drink in one hand, and two in the other, “I know you said you didn’t want a drink yet, but I got one for you anyways since the wait was long.”
“Oh, thank you,” You take the drink from him, warmth spreading from your cheeks down to your neck as you force yourself to look away from him. Though, you were instantly met with the same teasing look you had endured by everyone else you had seen slapped on the faces of the couple in front of you.
It wasn’t long until Charlie dragged you into the middle of the dance floor as soon as she heard the beginning of her favorite song blaring through the speakers. Bodies were crammed against yours as you moved your hips to the beat of the music, your arms thrown over her shoulders as she moved her own. The alcohol in your system allows you to have confidence you otherwise wouldn’t have, encouraging your salacious movements that Nico couldn’t look away from.
The lights above were illuminating you in a way that made you look otherworldly as you tilted your head backward, your hair cascading down your back in waves. You let your eyes wander amongst the sea of people around you, but you nearly freeze in your spot when you catch Nico’s stare. He doesn’t falter when he realizes you’re looking back at him, only bringing his drink up to his lips before you swiftly avert your gaze.
The two of you stay out there for nearly half of the second song, but filter off when Charlie yells something about getting another drink. Nico wasn't exaggerating when he said the wait was long, but neither of you minded as you familiarized yourself with the strangers next to you. They were also visiting from America, one of them making an amused comment about how Americans always managed to find one another, and they had asked if you had any recommendations for them while they were there.
With a new drink in hand, you bid your new friends goodbye before turning to rejoin the group you arrived with. Charlie sees him before you do, her eyes squinting as she looks through the veil of smoke decorating the dance floor. She sees the way Nico is leaning into one of the girls whose name she had forgotten, his lips turned upward as she speaks directly into his ear. Charlie quickly looks to you in hopes that she could distract you before you took notice, but the solemn look that had fallen on your face told her she was a second too late.
To say you were confused as you looked upon the scene in front of you, would be an understatement. Ever since that night at Nico’s parents, he had been more upfront and clear with his intentions, or as clear as he could be without downright saying it out loud, and they led you to believe all that had been said and done. Now, you weren’t sure what to believe. However, your confusion was quick to shift towards insecurity that you drunkenly masked with jealousy.
“Hey,” Charlie’s voice filters through the cracks of your thoughts, “Want to go back to the floor?”
You moved your eyes to her, and you could see her own confusion written on her face, but you choose to act as if nothing had happened. Instead, you give her a tight-lipped smile and shake your head before grasping her free hand in your own and tugging her through the multitude of people standing about. If it weren’t so loud in the club, you would have heard her deep sigh as she lets you guide her, but you can feel her sympathy in the way she tightly squeezes your hand.
When you reach the others, you take the empty spot on the couch next to Timo while Charlie beelines towards Nina. You can feel Nico’s stare piercing the side of your head as you greet his teammate, letting him pull you into his side as he wraps his arm around your shoulders, but you don’t dare to look in his direction. You knew all he had to do was look at you a certain way and you would fall right back into the same trap he seemingly set before. 
You can see Charlie engaged in a rushed conversation with Nico in the corner of your eye, and you can’t stop yourself from tossing curious glances their way. Timo is trying to hold a conversation with you, but he takes quick note of the way your focus lies with his team captain, much like it always had before, and he chuckles to himself. When he sees Nico walking towards you, he quietly excuses himself, but not before sparing you a teasing drop of the left eye.
“Can we talk,” Nico asks as he’s standing before you, extending his hand for you to take,  “Please.”
His gaze was soft and pleading as he looked down at you, your bottom lip pulled between your teeth as you breathed deeply. The few seconds that passed felt like an eternity to Nico as he waited, but the moment he felt your soft palm slide into his own, nothing else mattered. He helped you to your feet, not letting your hand fall from his as he carefully guided you away from everyone and down a hallway littered with people.
He twisted the doorknobs of the various doors you passed until one finally opens, and he was gently pulling you in behind him. The room is dimly lit by the bulbs above, the walls lined with shelves that were home to what appeared to be cleaning supplies. A tense silence fills the room as you wait for Nico to say something, for him to at least tell you why he has you in a storage closet.
“What’s wrong,” He slowly asks, taking a step forward so that he’s only a few inches away from you.
“Nothing is wrong,” You deflect, looking at the wall behind him, “I’m fine.”
“I don’t believe you,” He shakes his head, “Everything seemed to be going good until you came back from the bar. You didn’t even look at me.”
“Didn’t think you’d notice,” You mumbled, silently cursing the tipsy state of mind you were in that gave you the confidence to say something you otherwise would keep to yourself. Mostly because you knew you were being over dramatic, but also because you were scared that there was weight behind your reasoning. 
You had hoped Nico didn’t pick up on the words that fell from your lips, but he did. He always did. His face twists in confusion as he tries to put together just what you had meant, but he was at a loss. He had been paying attention to you, and only you, the entire night, his eyes never leaving you for long. Not until you had disappeared behind a crowd of people at the bar and he began talking to– Oh.
“You were jealous,” He announces, his voice lighter and lined with a hint of amusement, “Weren’t you?”
“What,” You scoff, only meeting his stare for a fleeting moment, “Of course not. What would I be jealous of?” You visibly cringe at how unconvincing you sound, the octave of your voice higher than you intended it to be.
“Well, I promise there’s nothing to be jealous of,” He lowly chuckled as he hesitantly takes your hand, “Not that you were of course, but if you were, you should know that she’s married to a friend of mine. She was also asking about you, and that’s what we were talking about.”
This time you do meet his eye, blood pounding in your ears as his touch sends a shock from your hand all the way to your shoulder. He peers down at you, watching the way your shoulders relax and the storm of emotions swirling in your eyes calms and clears. He can tell that you’re searching for the right words to say but are coming up short, so he continues. 
“The other night,” He pauses when you drop your gaze, reaching his hand up so he can cradle your jaw in his palm and tilt your head to look at him, “The other night, I meant it when I said I wanted everything to do with you. I don’t just want to kiss you. I don’t just want small touches when I can steal them. I want it all, if you’re willing to give that to me.”
Your mouth is slightly parted as you take quick and shallow breaths, trying to will yourself to say something, to do anything other than stand there in silence. Nico is looking at you in anticipation, his thumb running along the curve of your cheek as his eyes dance across your face. The tension filling the room was slowly suffocating you, and you knew the only way to breathe again was to speak. 
“I would give you anything you wanted,” You exhale, not caring how pathetically desperate it sounded, “You’ve had all of me from the moment I heard your voice.”
Nico carefully leans down, his lips hovering over your own as he teases, “Only after you heard my voice, huh?”
“I’m a sucker for an accent,” You bashfully giggle, letting your eyes flutter closed as you shudder underneath him.
With a subtle tilt of your chin, he connects his lips with your own in what starts as a soft, slow kiss between two people who need a gentle reminder of what they mean to each other. However, the second your hands lazily drag up Nico’s shirt to loop behind his neck, it turns into something much more. Something more driven with passion and desperation. He grips your hip with his free hand, the other sliding to cup the back of your head as he deepens the kiss.
You cautiously step backward until your body comes in contact with the wall behind you, your fingers tangling in his hair as you stand on your toes to meet him with just as much fervor as he was giving. It was a clash of teeth and tongue, ardent desire pouring out of both of you so urgently that it left you weak in the knees. It was the kind of kiss you only ever heard about in books, and Nico effortlessly brought it to life. 
He explores the curve of your body with his hand, the thin material covering you granting you access to feel it like there was nothing separating him from you. Your head falls back as Nico begins to kiss down your jaw until he’s placing open-mouthed kisses to the column of your neck. Breathless moans tumble from your lips as you tug on the ends of his hair, eliciting a few quiet groans from his mouth.
“Nico,” You call out as his teeth carefully nip at the skin, “If you leave another hickey, I’ll kill you.” 
His laughter rumbles against your neck before he’s pulling away to look at you, “I wasn’t intending on it, schatzi. Not in a storage closet at a club.”
Warmth spreads from your stomach at the implication that the only thing stopping him from marking you again was simply the less than ideal location. Images of what could be, of Nico discovering parts of you he had only dreamed of seeing before, flooded your mind, leaving you dizzy and even more flushed than you already were. He maintains your stare, his eyes full of nothing but want and something else you were too fearful to recognize.
“We– I think we should go back out there,” You whisper as your chest rapidly rises and falls, “Just in case they come looking for us.”
“I really don’t think they will,” He chuckles, “But, yeah. We probably should.”
Nico laces his fingers with your own before he’s guiding you back through the maze of bodies and back to his friends. When you finally join them, every single one of them is looking from your faces to your intertwined hands as smug smirks toy at their lips. Your face heats up at their attention, mentally preparing yourself for the teasing that is undoubtedly going to occur for the rest of the night, as you follow Nico to the couch.
The rest of the night flew by with only very minimal teasing, most of which came from the mouths of Luca and Timo, and by the time you were back at Nico’s apartment, you were ready to sleep for the next 12 hours. He offered to make you and Charlie breakfast the following morning, but you both declined because there was no way you would be awake before noon. You laid in bed replaying the moment at the club over and over, your hesitance to accept his feelings for you were true slowly melting away until you were fast asleep.
The next day, the reality that your trip was coming to an end hit you when you were in the middle of lunch with Nico and a few others. You had experienced so much in the last week, both culturally and emotionally, and the idea of having to go back home wasn’t all that appealing to you. Of course you would be going straight to Michigan to continue your summer adventures, but Michigan didn’t have the one thing you really wanted; Nico.
You spent the rest of the day following the others around wherever they managed to drag you, which was primarily shops of different variety. The slightly hectic schedule forced you to swallow your sadness and focus on the present rather than the events of tomorrow. As the day was winding down and dinner ideas were being thrown around, Charlie insisted that the two of you buy ‘I love Switzerland’ shirts at one of the souvenir shops before retiring because ‘Did you even go if you didn’t buy the cliche shirt?’.
At dinner, Nico was always touching you in some way. Whether that be his arm slung over the back of your chair, his knee pushed against your own, or his hand on the exposed skin of your thigh. His displays of affection slightly caught you off guard, but you welcomed them with a shy smile you would pass him any time he looked at you. You even found an ounce of confidence to place your hand over his own, curling your fingers around his index finger as you willed yourself to focus on the conversation around you.
“I’m going to miss you,” Nina said as she hugged you tightly, “You really must come back sometime, and I’ll call you next time I’m in the city so we can go out!”
“I’ll miss you,” You smile, pulling away from her but keeping your hands on her biceps, “And I would love that. I’ll come back, I promise. Even if Nico isn’t here.”
“Ouch,” His voice sounds from behind you, forcing your gaze to him as he nears, “Replacing me with my sister are you?”
“She is infinitely cooler than you,” You playfully rolls your eyes.
“She’s right, I am.”
When the three of you arrived back at Nico’s, you and Charlie had gone straight to what had been your room for the last seven days. You had yet to start packing and you had a twelve o’clock flight, which meant you needed to be on the road to the airport no later than 8:00, and that left you no time to pack anything in the morning. While the two of you finished squeezing all of your clothes back into your suitcases, Nico was busy trying to busy himself with anything he could find rather than focus on the fact that you were going to be leaving tomorrow and his relationship with you was now much more complicated than before. 
“So,” Charlie draws out, “Did any results come from your sneaky little make out sessions?”
“What do you mean,” You furrow your brows, zipping the flap inside of your suitcase.
“Are you guys going to be like official or just two people who run off into the nearest empty room and get it on every chance they get,” She snickers as she throws you the dress you had worn when you went to visit Nico’s family. 
With a small, reminiscent smile on your face as you look down at the material, “We’re not– I don’t really know, to be honest. We haven’t talked about that.”
“Do you want to talk about it? With him,” She quirks her brow. She watches as your movements falter before you settle on a simple shrug. “Well, I think you should at least try or I think you’ll both regret it. At the very least I think you two should get it on before we go. I brought earplugs.”
“Charlotte,” You gasp, your eyes widening as she fails to bite back her smile, “Seriously? ‘Get it on’? You’ve been talking to Jack too much.”
“Yeah,” Her face reddens at the mention of your best friend, “I’m just saying it wouldn’t hurt anything! Show him how you feel, you know?”
While you shift the conversation to a different topic, the idea she had shamelessly proposed was ringing in your ears. While the proposition that you, in her words, get it on with him seemed a little far-fetched, telling him how you felt about everything would likely be a good idea. Especially given the fact you wouldn’t see him for another month and a half after you left for Michigan, and you would find a way to talk yourself out of anything if you let yourself wait that long.
Charlie didn’t ask any questions when you suddenly rose to your feet and stepped into the hall, but she did toss a quiet ‘Use protection’ before you were gone from her sight. Your feet carefully padded across the wood floor of the hallway, your hands nervously wringing at the fabric of your shorts until you were stood right outside of Nico’s bedroom. The soft light was slipping through the crack at the bottom of the door, illuminating your feet as you stared at them and mulled over your sudden actions.
Intaking a sharp breath, you brought your knuckles up to his door and lightly knocked a few times. Nerves were pricking at your skin as you waited for him, the pit in your stomach growing with each passing second and your hands were shaking at your side. When Nico finally pulls the door open, your come face to face with his naked chest and every sentence you had pre-planned in your head flew out of the window.
You have to force your eyes up to his own, your heart pounds in your chest as you try to get your mouth to cooperate with your brain. He’s looking at you with a slight sense of worry swirling in his eyes as he holds the door open and gently calls out your name, your silence making him uneasy. Through a surge of confidence you didn’t know you had, you were rushing forward and slamming your lips on his own. After all, you had always preferred to show people how you felt anyway.  
Nico’s reaction is instantaneous as you loop your arms around his neck and stand on your toes, pressing your mouth against him so desperately that he stumbles backwards. His own arms wrap around your waist and pull you into his chest, keeping you steady against him as the door clicks shut behind you. He turns you, his movements calculated and careful to keep his mouth on yours, and drags his hands down to grasp at the back of your thighs so he can lift you onto his dresser.
Your legs hook around his hips, your fingertips pressing into the muscle above his shoulder blade as his palms explore the curve of your body. Your head becomes dizzy as your mouths move together, neither of you wanting to pull away from the start of a moment you had both thought of far too many times. Nico was the one to pull away, his breathless pants meshing with your own as he slowly trails his fingers up until your chin is between his thumb and forefinger.
His thumb brushes your soft lips, his dark eyes boring into your own as goosebumps rise all over you. The skin underneath his touch was hot, burning with the desire to feel it across every surface of your body. You let out a shaky breath as your eyes flit across his face, learning every scar, every imperfection that made him undeniably the most attractive man you had ever seen. 
“Nico,” You whisper before taking a deep breath, bringing your eyes back to meet his burning gaze, “I want to– I want you.”
The pad of his thumb slightly tugs at your bottom lip as he says, “Are you sure?”
A smirk tugs at your lips as you think back to the moment a few nights ago, “Is this the part where I say I’ve never been more sure of anything?”
“Only if you mean it,” His voice was serious, yet gentle at the same time. 
“I do,” You swallow, “I mean it.”
Nico drew you closer, holding you against his chest as he reconnected your mouths. Your lips molded to his own like you had been made for each other, and it made him ache to see how well all of you fit against him. You clung to his body as he kissed you, gentle yet demanding with a fervent desire that matched your own. He was quick to move you over to his perfectly made bed, delicately laying you on the soft material of his comforter as he hovers over you.
You keep your legs wrapped around his waist, keeping him close enough that you can feel his bulge pressing into the flesh of your thigh. The stubble that had grown out during your stay with him rubbed against your soft skin, but you welcomed the slight sting with eager arms as his hands slipped underneath your shirt. You reach between your bodies to grasp at the hem, and Nico is pulling away from you to help lift it over your head. 
You move to undo your bra, but Nico was faster than you, his fingers fumbling as he undid the clasps. His fingers trail down your arm as he drags the straps off your shoulders, your entire body shuddering underneath him as you keep your eyes on him. You watch as he straightens his back and he unabashedly lets his gaze wander across your exposed chest, and, for the first time, you don’t feel the desire to cover yourself because no one has ever looked at the way Nico is. Like you were carved and sculpted by the Gods themselves. 
“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” You tease, propping yourself up on your elbows.
“Tempting,” He deeply chuckles.
Slowly, he leans over and briefly meets your lips, your head falling back onto the mattress before he begins to kiss down your jaw. His fingers drag across your skin, over the curve of your breast, and down your stomach. His touch sets the skin under it on fire, his lips cooling it down as he moves down your body until he’s slotted between your thighs. His gaze flicked up to you, but you were too entranced in the way his mouth felt against you to meet his stare. 
His fingers loop in the waistband of your shorts, steadily sliding them down your legs until they’re in a pool on the floor. As the cool air hits your warm center, you finally lift your head to see Nico stepping out of his shorts and you can’t help but admire him. His stiff cock springs free from his shorts, a subtle gasp tumbling from your lips that you hoped he missed, but of course he didn’t. He quirks his brow at you, a coy smile on his face as he steps forward.
“Move further up,” He warmly orders, but his eyes are shimmering with unwavering devotion.
You do as he asks, shifting your body so that your head was placed on the plush pillows, eyes wide in anticipation as Nico positions his body just over your own. He uses his forearms to support his weight, gaze flickering between your eyes and your lips as you begin to drag the tips of your fingers over his sides and onto his back. He shivers under your touch, his tongue darting to wet his lips as he closes the gap between you.
When Nico kisses you, you feel weightless, as if you were floating above the clouds and into the heavens. The way his mouth moves with your own, fluidly and effortlessly left you wondering why you had ever bothered to kiss anyone else before because nothing would ever compare to this. You feel his hand drop between you, his hand diving between your legs and pushing them further apart before his fingers are lingering over your heat.
“No, want you,” You groan against his lips, a chill running up your spine as he draws his finger between the slickness of your folds.
“I know, schhatz,” He mumbles, your head falling deep into the pillow when he presses his thumb to your clit, “Need to get you ready, yeah?”
Your response was stifled by the breathless whimper that slips through your lips as he slips a finger into your entrance. His movements are slow and prudent, working his finger inside of you as you languish underneath him. As Nico feels you rock your hips against his hand, he uses a second finger to further ready you before he were to let himself fall all the way into the bliss that is you.
“Nico, please,” You plead, your fingernails digging into the plane of his shoulder, “Need you now.”
“Are you sure,” Nico reiterates, wanting to give you the opportunity to say no should you wish to.
“Yes.”
Nico pulls his fingers out of you, immediately grasping his length in his hand before his eyes are on your face. He takes in the way your eyelashes flutter as you grasp onto him, breathing shaky as you peer up at him, and he can’t help but surge forward and encase your lips in a small, yet passion fueled kiss. He readies himself at your entrance as he kisses you, teasing and prodding at the hole until you’re nails harshly scrape against his skin. 
The weight of his body as he pushes himself into you dizzies you, your eyes squeezing shut as you drop your head away from his and a slew of broken moans fill the room. Nico goes until he’s entirely bottomed out inside of you and he feels your walls stretch around him. He heard a quiet wince as you shift underneath him, but the moment he goes to say something, you beat him to it.
“I’m sorry,” You murmur, “It’s just been a while, but I’m okay. You can move, and yes, I’m sure.”
His gaze doesn’t falter from your face as he begins to slowly rock his hips against yours, making sure to keep his movements short and shallow until you were more relaxed. You’re biting your lip to muffle your moans, to keep them contained in the small bubble the two of you had created for yourselves. It wasn’t until Nico felt the sharp point of your heel dig into his lower back that his thrusts became deeper and rhythmic.
“Fuck,” He groans as he buries his head in the crook of your neck, your walls clenching around him.
A mixture of whines and curse words filter into Nico’s ears as he hits into you at a pace that is winding the coil in your stomach almost painfully tight. The way he was able to read your body like he had a map of it imprinted his mind drove you crazy as you tangle your hands in his hair. Quiet grunts vibrate against your skin before his right hand is hooking behind your knee and bringing it over his shoulder.
“Nico,” You mewl, the new angle allowing him to reach a part of you that you didn’t know existed, “Oh my god.”
“Huere schön,” He rumbles as his motion becomes quicker, more fervent and desperate. (Fucking beautiful.)
“I’m cl–”
Your sentence is cut short as your orgasm washes over you like a wave of scalding water, your entire body lighting on fire as Nico has to smother your mouth with his hand to keep your moans quiet. He continues to drive himself into you, his own ecstasy filled climax nearing a head as your walls flutter around him and your legs shake under him. Your hold on him tightens as he fucks you through your blinding orgasm, and not even his hand is enough to stifle your wanton moans.
With a few more lazy stutters of his hips, Nico is pulling himself all the way out of you before pumping himself in his hand, releasing his load all across your stomach. Your eyes were still screwed shut as you descended the blissful feeling of euphoria coursing through your veins, and that acted as an extra push for him to finish before he leans down to briefly capture your lips as he comes down from his own high.
Your eyes flutter open as he pulls away, meeting his gaze to give him a lazy smile as you say, “Can you clean me up?”
“Shit, yeah. Of course,” He rushes out, scrambling off his bed to find something to wipe your stomach.
He grabs two of the nearest clean shirts he can find, not having a towel in sight, and he makes quick work of the warm, sticky liquid spread across your skin. He makes sure he’s gotten everything before he tosses it in the direction of his dirty clothes, his gaze faltering over your naked, flushed body. He hesitantly hands you the other shirt he had grabbed, apprehension now cracking through his features. 
“Thank you,” You sheepishly mumble, despite the man before having now seen every part of you.
You pushed yourself up into a sitting position, slipping the shirt over your head as he stepped into his shorts. Nico could see the worry etching onto your face, and he’s quick to take the spot next to you and pulls you into his chest. He stays quiet, waiting for you to make the first move because while he knew he was ready for the talk that undoubtedly came after what the two of you had just done, he wasn’t sure if you were yet.
“What does this mean,” You whisper after the lapse of silence, nerves pricking your eyes, “For us?”
“What do you want it to mean,” He asks, equally as anxious as you were as he holds you close to him.
“I want to be with you,” You earnestly speak, though your voice still cracks, “But I don’t know if you want to be with me. I have my internship coming up and I’ll be busy, and you’re already busy enough, so I could understand if that wasn’t what you wanted. But I’m willing to make it work, for you. I meant it when I said I would give you anything you wanted.”
Nico’s breath catches in his throat as your words ring in his ears, and, with the mention of his job and your internship, suddenly he was slapped in the face with reality. He had let himself relish in the fantasy of summer the past week so deeply he had forgotten what he told himself, but now he was reminded of all of the harsh possibilities that could be, and he remembered why he had pulled away from you all those times before. It wasn’t always because of wrong timing for him, but you never knew that. You never knew that some things were on purpose, calculated and planned, to keep you at arms length from him.
His silence made your heart fall to your feet, and the unreadable expression on his face made you want to throw up. The expression he had on his face reminded you of the one you had sported yourself on more than one occasion, and you were silently begging him to say something, even if it was a rejection. Because at least then you would know how he truly felt.
“We can talk more later,” He finally says, his hand timidly flexing on your back, “This can wait, but you need to sleep before your flight.”
You don’t put up a fight as Nico lets go of you for a fleeting second to lean over and click the lamp on his table off. Neither of you say anything as you crawl underneath his blanket, letting him mold his chest to your back as he lazily wraps an arm around your waist. Your breathing was uneven as your mind wandered to the worst of possibilities, but you kept them to yourself. Partly because you were too afraid to ruin the already crumbling moment, but also because you didn’t know what you would do if you had found out everything he had said and done was a lie. 
When you wake up the following morning, it was to Charlie’s incessant knocking, and to an empty bed. You abruptly sit up, eyes darting around the room in search of any sign of Nico, and also your clothes. The only evidence you had of Nico leaving was the half-made bed, causing your lips to turn downward into a disappointed frown. Had he even tried to wake you up, or did he slip out undetected on purpose?
Once you had dressed yourself in the clothes you had originally entered the room in, you pulled the door open to see Charlie sporting a smug smile. Though, the second she registered your dejected face and the empty bedroom behind you, her look morphed into one of anger fueled sympathy. You didn’t say anything as you stepped around her to go back into the guest room in search of your phone. Maybe he had texted you, not wanting to wake you so you could get as much sleep as possible, but your messages from him were empty.
You ignore Charlie’s quiet, careful voice as she calls out your name, your feet moving quickly to lock yourself in the bathroom to get ready and finish packing your things. As you brushed your teeth, you felt like the air from your lungs was being sucked out of you, making them burn in your chest. You wanted to believe that Nico had a good reason for disappearing without a trace, but the logical part of your brain was snuffing out the last remaining shred of hope by the second.
“I’m fine, Charlie,” You say as you walk back into the room, your voice flat and clipped.
“Well, I’m not,” She scoffed, “What the fuck did he do? Where is he? I didn’t even hear him leave.”
“Don’t know,” You shrug as you shove the last remaining items into your bags, “Didn’t say anything to me, but it’s fine. I’m sure he has a good reason. Maybe he had to do some media stuff.”
“He better have a good reason,” She snapped, but you knew it wasn’t directed at you. Charlie had always been a fiercely protective person when it came to the people she loves, and she could cleary see through every excuse you made for him. Though, even with the ball of rage in her chest, she was almost as confused as you were, and she hated that she didn’t know how to help you.
The sound of the front door distracts the both of you, and you’re quickly running into the hall to see if Nico had returned, but instead, your eyes settle on the body of his sister. She had her phone up to her ear, her words harsh and angry as she spoke to whoever was on the other end. Once she noticed your presence looming in the hallway, desolate and defeated, she snapped one more comment toward the victim of her anger before hanging up and focusing on you.
“Hey,” She softly greeted, but you can see the sympathy swimming in her eyes.
“Nina, I love you, but I’m going to kick your brother's ass,” Charlie called out as she dragged both her and your suitcase into the living room.
“Trust me, I will help,” She sighed before walking towards you, delicately placing her hands on your shoulders, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” You lie, blinking away the tears burning your eyes, “I’ll be fine.”
Both of you knew your lie was far from convincing, but she didn’t say anything about it as she pulled you into her embrace. It was taking every ounce of willpower you had to keep yourself from crying as you hugged her, not wanting to make a big deal out of something that never really started anyway. After all, maybe there was a reason the two of you never seemed to find the right time back home and you had just always been too enchanted by the potential that you couldn’t see things clearly.
Nina helps you and Charlie do a final walkthrough of the apartment to make sure nothing was going to be left behind. Neither of them attempted to bring up Nico or what had happened before you were finally ready to leave. With the handle of your suitcase in hand, you walk out of his apartment door for the last time and you realize that maybe believing Nico’s words and actions to be meaningful was just wishful thinking all along, and you should’ve known that wishes rarely came true.
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anyarose011 · 3 months ago
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Christmas Time is Here {Angus Tully x Reader}
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Summary: Christmas (FINALLY) has arrived! What better way to spend the day full of cheer than with your family (and the boy you previously didn't really care for until just a few days prior). It'd be better if you could spend it in Boston as well...
Part 7 of ?? (Masterlist)
Warnings: Making out, swearing, talk of sex, and jokes about pimping out one's father.
Heyyyyyyy, what's uppppp, it's meeeeee. So...okay, long story short, I got back from strudying abroad and have been using this summer to just readjust to America (it's been rough, low key). So I just want to apologize for the long wait, and I hope this chapter is worth it. Also, because the main characters in this story (reader and Angus) are minors, I WILL NOT be adding smut. Still, thank you guys so much for your patience!
Word Count: 6.4k
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You thought you slept in at first, until you glanced at the clock on the nightstand and read ‘7:30am’. Groaning, you sat up, rubbing your face when the realization hit you: It was Christmas!
That’s what caused you to leap out of your bed and immediately look under it, pulling out the three horribly wrapped gifts in newspapers tied with a twine ribbon. Before you could do anything else, a light knock on the doorway made you flinch.
“Yeah?” You whispered.
“Are you decent?”
Giggling at Angus’ use of your words from last night, you said. “Not really, I’m still in my pajamas.”
“Get dressed, I wanna show you something.”
You snorted. “You’re not gonna kill me or something, are you?”
“No, but on an unrelated note, we’re going off campus.”
“Wait,” your face dropped. “seriously?”
He snickered. “No. It’s just in the theater.”
You shook your head. “Okay, I’ll meet you in the hall.”
His footsteps echoed outside, and you decided to give him his gift early. After changing into a long-sleeved shirt and pants, then your socks and boots, you slipped out of the door whilst hiding the present behind your back.
“What’s behind your back?” Angus immediately asked once he saw you.
“Merry Christmas to you too.” You teased. “It’s nothing.”
“Amy…”
Sighing overdramatically, you held out the gift. His eyes grew to the size of the moon (both things that you still think are beautiful) as he took it from you. “I…what is this?”
“Well,” you shrugged. “it’s a present, but you kind of have to open it to-.”
“-No, I mean…I didn’t get you anything.”
“That’s okay, I don’t want anything.”
“Hey-.”
“-Ordinary people say ‘thank you’ and open the damn thing.” You smirked.
He mirrored your expression before tearing the newspapers. It was almost funny to you how Angus Tully looked as if his breath was stolen from his lungs just at the sight of Little Women in his hands.
“This is yours.”
“Well, it’s yours now. That’s kind of how gifts work.”
“It’s your favorite though.”
“Who told you it’s my favorite?” You tilted your head, as if challenging him.
You’d never seen a face whiter than the snow outside. “I-I, um, shit.”
“No,” you shook your head. “you’re telling me you kiss me so hard my lips turned blue in the kitchen-!”
“-Hey, hey! Shut up!” He tried to be serious but only ended up laughing.
“But you can’t remember what my favorite book is?!”
Taking a deep breath, Angus then said. “I’m sorry, okay?”
A smile pulled onto your lips. “Yeah, I’m just messing with you.”
“You’re horrible.”
“Thank you.” A giggle fell from you. “Oh god, I hope my dad didn’t hear that.”
“I checked his bed, he’s out somewhere.”
“Alright,” you shrugged. “escort me to the theater then.”
He grinned from ear to ear as he led you through the halls. Unashamedly, you were a bit disappointed; you wished he’d taken your hand. Still, despite the sun being out, to your knowledge, you were the only two people awake. You wouldn’t blame Mary for sleeping in, and it was Christmas, no way Danny would waste his time with you three; that man had family in Worcester.
When you and Angus made it to the theater, you both walked up the steps to the stage and after he set the book down on the floor, he leaned against the piano.
You crossed your arms, smirking. “Mr. Tully, you better not serenade me.”
“I’m not singing.” He tried not to smile.
“So, there is a God.”
“Quit it.” He snickered. “Sit down, I’m gonna teach you how to play the piano.”
Raising your brow, you said. “You told me you hadn’t played since you were ten.”
“I hadn’t taken lessons since I was ten. We have a piano back at home, so I still play sometimes.”
“Never here?”
“Never here. Come on.” he tilted his head to the bench.
Rolling your eyes, you sat down, placing your hands on the keys. Angus came to stand beside you. “Okay, you know the alphabet?”
“What the hell is that?”
“Perfect.” He scoffed, then pointed to the white keys. “So, you only have to know ‘A’ to ‘G’. If this,” he pressed the white key in the middle of the piano between two black keys. “is ‘D’, then what is this?” He hovered his finger above the white key to the right of it.
“E.” You said simply. “I do know that this ‘B’ key is out of tuned though.”
You reached over his arm and played the ‘C’ an octave above, bringing your face just a little closer to his. He smiled. “Okay smartass, you do know what the alphabet it.”
“Yeah, I just don’t know how to play anything, that’s all.”
Angus took your right hand in his hand (fucking finally), and brought your fingers to play the ‘E’ and ‘D#’ a few times before then ‘B’, ‘D’, ‘C’, and ‘A’.
“Know that one?” He asked.
“‘Fur Elise’.” You grinned at the name. “And you’re sure you wish I was your first kiss?”
He answered plain and simple. “I’m sure.”
“Okay,” you decided to keep toying with him. “what comes next? And I’m pretty sure I have to use my other hand at some point.”
You expected a retort from him, but he only went behind you and grabbed your left hand. Gently, he pressed his fingers over yours, and guided you to slowly play the piece by Beethoven. It was peaceful to say the least; well, as peaceful as it could be while your heart was trying to beat itself out of your chest.
As his chest hovered against your back, you decided to soothe your own worries.
“Son of a bitch, you just wanted to hold my hand!” You teased.
The music stopped as he pressed his face against your shoulder while laughing. It should’ve made you uneasy how just at ease he was around you; but perhaps you both had already acted like this before you kissed. Perhaps, with only being around him for a week, you had come to know him as a close friend (even with how much you loathed him at first).
He took his head off your shoulder and looked at you, his nose practically against yours. “And what if I did?”
This was the part where you were supposed to say something smart in return and make him feel just a bit stupid. But…were his eyes always that brown and beautiful?
You were just a girl; no one should blame you for immediately throwing your arms around his neck and kissing him.
Luckily, unlike the night before, he was less surprised this time. His arms were around your waist, and whether he meant to or not, he pulled you down to the floor with him when his own legs gave out.
Still, even though the sudden shift of your body caused you to squeak out in surprise, your lips didn’t leave his as your hands soon carded through his hair, and his moved further down your hips.
“I don’t want to do anything more,” you said quickly between kisses. “I don’t want to do anything more!”
His lips moved down to your neck, one of his hands came back up to cradle your jaw tenderly. “Me neither.”
“Okay.” You answered, your voice slightly pitched as he kissed your neck. Angus laid you down as softly as he could on the stage and hovered above you; his kisses never leaving your skin. His hand found yours and held it above your head as he brought his lips back up to yours. Even with it being clumsy, nothing in your whole life had felt so…good.
You wondered just how anyone on earth could get anything done after being kissed like this for the first time.
Perhaps it is because they hear their father calling their name.
At the sound of your father’s voice echoing through the halls, you and Angus froze. With one look, you both immediately pulled away, and he got off you, sitting on the piano bench and putting his hands on the keys.
It was quite comedic how that was the first time you heard him play; and he was quite good at it.
Luckily, you managed to get up and lean against the piano the moment the door to the auditorium opened and soon slammed shut. Angus stopped playing, and you both looked up and saw your father, huffing as if to catch his breath from running around everywhere.
“Merry Christmas.” Were his first words, and after both you and Angus repeated his sentiment, he then asked. “Where the hell have you been?”
You shrugged. “Just here.”
His eyes traveled to you and then to Angus, who, like any nervous teen boy who’d nearly been caught after making out with the teacher’s daughter, waved. Your father simply nodded. “Well, come on. I have something to show you two.”
He left through the doors he came in, and after you and Angus glanced at each other, you both followed; Angus picking up the book of course. Your father took you both to the dining hall where Mary had been waiting, and proudly presented a frankly shabby Christmas tree with some wrapped gifts to you.
“No ornaments?” Angus asked.
“Oh,” your father sighed. “I’m sure we can round up some ornaments somewhere. Uh, now.” He picked up one of the gifts, handing it to Angus. “This is for you.”
The boy glanced up at him as if he handed him the best thing he could receive that day (next to your copy of Little Women of course). He tore it open, and it was revealed to be another book.
“‘Meditations.’” Your father read the title. “by Marcus Aurelius. For my money, it’s like the Bible, the Koran and the Bhagavad Gita all rolled up into one. And the best part is not one mention of God.”
Mary huffed, obviously not a fan.
“And this,” he handed her the other package under the tree. “is for you.”
She opened it, revealing another book of ‘Meditations’. “So, you just give this to everyone?”
“And.” He gave her the other gift under the tree; that being a horribly wrapped bottle of whiskey.
That got her to smile wide as she took it. Your father, grabbing the final package under the tree, then handed it to you. “Yes, it’s a book, no, it’s not ‘Meditations’.”
Smiling, you unwrapped it and stood absolutely still in shock before exploding into a cheer. “Where did you get this?! I couldn’t find even in Boston!”
“The day trip we took to New York for Thanksgiving? Found it while you wandered off in the bookstore.” He joked.
Rolling your eyes, you couldn’t wipe the smile off your face if you tried.
“What is it?” Angus asked, looking over your shoulder.
“Maria,” you answered. “by Mary Wollstonecraft. She’s Mary Shelley’s mom.”
“Like, Frankenstein Mary Shelley?”
Oh, how much you wanted to kiss him just because he knew the author of a popular book. Still, you didn’t know how many men even knew a woman wrote one of the most iconic stories of all time. Still, your father and closest woman you had to a mother in years were watching you, so you settled on shoving him.
“That’s right; maybe you’re not that stupid.” Before he could verbally respond, you were almost out the door. “I got something for you guys, be right back!”
You felt like a little girl again as you ran through the halls and up the stairs into the infirmary room before taking the shittly wrapped presents off your bed. You slid down the main staircase railing before barging back into the dining hall where it looked like barely anything had changed.
“What was my time?” You asked your father, a huge smile on your face.
He gave a look. “You didn’t ask us to time you.”
“Happy Christmas.” You handed him his gift, then repeated the same action and sentiment to Mary.
Your father was the first one to open his, and a pleasant smile spread upon his face while holding it up to you; a coloring book of ancient Rome.
“How’d you know I wanted this?” He joked. He had perhaps almost every single book on Roman history, so you had to get creative.
You shrugged. “Oh, you wouldn’t stop talking about it, remember?”
Mary opened hers next, grinning from ear to ear once it was unwrapped. A pink pocket-sized prayer book. “How’d you know I lost mine?”
“Because you told me.”
She hugged you, pinching your cheek when she pulled away. “You’re an angel.”
“Oh, Angus,” Your father took the forgotten envelope out from under the tree, handing it to the boy beside you. “this came in the mail for you.”
He opened it, and glancing over his arm, you saw cash stuffed inside of the card with “Greetings of the Season and Best Wishes for a Happy New Year” printed inside, with the only written words being: “Love, Mom and Stanley.” Not any personalized notes or words of adoration anywhere to be found.
You wanted to squeeze his hand, give him any traditional sense of comfort; yet you weren’t ready to explain to your father and mother figure about the both of you…you weren’t dating, but you were something. So, instead, you merely pushed yourself against his side and acted annoying.
“Fuck, you’re loaded.” Mary scoldingly said your name, but you continued. “Well, he is! Yeesh, you should be paying off my father’s retirement if you hate him that much.”
“Merry Christmas to you too, Emma Woodhouse.” You father rolled his eyes.
Angus, fortunately, snorted. “I’ll think about it.”
“Alright,” Mary placed her hands on her hips. “now who’s hungry?”
As usual, the four of you had a lovely breakfast; although, this time, per Christmas tradition, you each had a little piece of chocolate with your pancakes she made. When helping her with the dishes, you saw that only one Christmas cookie you left out the night prior had remained.
When the dishes were done, you and Mary pulled the men into the teacher’s lounge.
“So why are we being held against out will?” Angus joked.
Your father sighed. “It’s almost ten-thirty.”
“And?”
“Charlie Brown!” You cheered, plopping yourself down on the carpet in front of the TV to turn it on.
“It’s the one tradition we have each Christmas,” your father explained and lowered his voice to Angus and Mary. “and one I wouldn’t mind getting rid of.”
“If you want to go drink alone while reading Agatha Christie, go ahead.” You announced, not turning to look at him as you flipped through the channels.
Mary and Angus merely laughed, and you proudly sat down on the couch. Your father mumbled incoherently, but before he could take a seat beside you, Mary grabbed his arm.
“Now, now, come help me make popcorn for the movie.”
Sighing, he let her lead him out of the teacher’s lounge and into the kitchen. Angus soon sat where your father would’ve if not for Mary. You smiled.
“Hi.”
“Hey.” He grinned, and there was silence (as always) between the two of you. One that was broken with. “Thank you.”
You tilted your head. “What for?”
“Just…” He laughed. “for liking me I guess. Also, for what you said about the stupid card and everything.”
Smiling, you glanced up to see if your father and Mary were close by. When you determined they weren’t, you took his face into your hands and gave him a quick peck on the lips.
“You don’t have to thank me for that, dumbass.” You pulled away, looking back at the movie as little children start to sing Christmas Time is Here. “Just don’t bitch for the rest of the day.”
He snorted. “I’ll try my best.”
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And he did. The four of you watched the movie, and after that, you and Angus went back up to the infirmary and spent the rest of the afternoon reading. Definitely not kissing at all; for sure not.
When you weren’t reading, you were either talking about stupid shit-.
“I thought I heard somewhere that plants can feel pain, do you think that’s true?” You asked, looking up at him while you laid at the end of his bed, your feet by his head.
“…I just want to thank you for letting me peek inside your mind and to see how weird it is.”
Or, surprisingly emotional conversations.
Angus nodded as he laid on the bed, you at his side. “Yeah, I mean…I had a good childhood, it just felt…weird sometimes.”
“I get it.” You rested your head on his shoulder as you both stared at the ceiling.
Still, it was perhaps the longest and most intimate interaction you ever had with a person up until then. How strange it was with a boy you hated only days ago.
Hours later, Mary called you both down for supper (luckily what was reheated from the previous night), and despite there only being four of you, you felt less lonely than when you had at the party. You sat beside Mary, not minding when the smoke of her cigarette tickled your nose.
“Thank you Mary,” your father smiled at her once he was finished. “that was just lovely.”
“Oh, is that an actual compliment?” You never heard Mary sound so surprised. He sighed heavily, and you didn’t bother holding back your laughter.
Angus set down his silverware. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a real family Christmas like this. Christmas dinner, I mean, family style, out of the oven, all the trimmings. My mom always just orders in from Delmonico’s.”
Mary nodded. “She’s got the right idea. Next year, I’m ordering from Delmonico’s.”
“Anyway, thank you, Mary.”
She winked at him, then turned to you. “Well? You got something to say?”
You squinted your eyes mid-chew. After swallowing, you replied with. “The meat’s a bit raw, don’t you think?”
“Oh, none of that today!” She scolded you as everyone else giggled. “Ungrateful child on Christmas.”
“It’s great, Mary.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know.”
Your father rose a glass. “I’d like to propose a toast. To my two unlikely companions on this snowy island, to my lovely daughter, and to our absent friends and family.” There was a pause much obviously for your mother and Curtis as if they were at the table with you. “I realize that none of us is here because he or she wants to be, so if there’s anything I can do to make the holidays a little cheerier for any of you, just say the word.”
“Copenhagen.” You didn’t miss a beat.
“Try again next year, Josephine.”
Angus shrugged. “Boston.”
“Boston?” Your father wrinkled his nose. “Why?”
“Why not? I want a real Christmas. I want to go ice skating. I want to see a real Christmas tree with ornaments, not that stupid thing.”
That was what you couldn’t take (as a joke, obviously). “How dare you. You put some respect on that tree my father grew with his blood, sweat, tears, and other fluids.”
Whilst the adults groaned your name in disgust, Angus stared down at his plate, his body trembling with repressed laughter.
“You both said it was nice.” Your father reencountered.
“It is nice.” Mary defended.
Angus, after recovering from his amusement, continued. “Come on, let’s get out of here. Let’s have a real holiday.”
 Your father huffed. “We’re not going to Boston. It’s out of the question.”
“You just told the kids ‘anything’. So, if Copenhagen doesn’t work, then why not Boston?” Mary argued.
“Mary, we’re not allowed to leave campus or the immediate environs.”
Well, it was your moment to shine. Now, here’s the trick: Usually, the ‘puppy dog eyes’ only work on parents from the ages of birth to nine. Sometimes, but not in your case, it can go on longer into the early 30s (that is, if your parents are total pushovers, or you’re a master manipulator). So, what do you do instead? Well, if it’s with your father, you do this:
Glance at him one last time as if to make a final plea, but then act as if you already know the answer and look down as if you’re trying not to show your sadness. You cannot be angry at all, just sad and disappointed so that he can assume you’re judging all of his life choices that he had made previously to lead him to this.
…It’s not easy, but it certainly gets you what you want (…there was like a 76% success rate last time you calculated it).
“But,” your father sighed upon looking at you and Angus. “I suppose we could call it a field trip. A field trip would fall under the ambit of additional academic pursuits. There’s even a fund set aside for additional academic pursuits.”
Despite him looking annoyed, you had a feeling deep down, he wouldn’t mind getting out of Barton. Angus gleefully rose out of his chair.
“I’ll go pack!”
You knew you couldn’t chase after him excitedly, so instead, you focused on your father.
“Now wait a minute,” you scowled. “so you not only listened but also let him persuade you into having us go to Boston, but you didn’t even bother with Copenhagen? That’s really sexist of you.”
He sighed, exhaustedly saying your name. “You’re a smart girl, so you should know that there’s a difference between a ten-hour flight across the world, and a-!” Of course he stopped when he saw your shit eating grin. “…and you’re a smart girl because you played me like a fiddle.”
Grinning from ear to ear, you got up from your seat and wrapped your arms around him, kissing his cheek. “Thank you, papa!”
He waved you off with a smile as you gathered up your dishes and glass, then went into the kitchen and placing them in the sink. You dashed up the stairs to the infirmary, to which you were greeted by Angus’ arms entrapping you.
Laughing, you reciprocated. “Why’re you like this?”
“I’m just happy, is that so shocking?”
“Yes.”
He pulled away only to then cup your cheeks in his hands and bring your lips to his. You sigh into his mouth, kissing him back.
“Does it ever stop?” You asked between kisses.
“What?” He led you to lie on the bed.
“You kissing me all the time."
“Do you want me to stop?”
“Don’t you dare.” You meekly threatened, pulling him back down.
Neither of you started packing for another fifteen minutes; not until you heard your father’s footsteps in the hallway.
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You surprised yourself by how well you slept that night. Usually, before an exciting day, you are restless. Yet, you actually jumped out of bed to get ready once your father came in to wake you up.
After a quick breakfast and an hour of waiting, the four of you were in the car on the way to Boston. A curse that you never thought possible is that you could not read in the car without throwing up; so, that forced Angus to read aloud (something that wasn’t a curse).
“‘That boy is a perfect Cyclops, isn’t he?’ said Amy.”
“That’s not what Amy sounds like.” You said matter of factly, laying almost flat in the backseat.
Angus sighed. “Well, she does today.”
“Mr. Tully,” your father looked in the rearview mirror. “is she implying that Amy usually sounds different?”
You grinned. “Yes I am.”
“Oh?” Mary arched her brow in interest.
“I’m not doing a voice.” Angus immediately retaliated.
Sighing dramatically, you stuck your bottom lip out. “Just this one line? Please?”
He stared at you as if you had him under a spell; either that, or your face was a monstrosity so terrible he couldn’t look away. It’s nice to think the first one. So, breathing heavily through his nose, he pitched his voice up.
“‘That boy ith a perfect thyclops, ithn’t he?’ said Amy.”
Needless to say, the car erupted into laughter.
You can’t quite remember what else was discussed between the four of you on that long drive. All you can recall is that you never once felt sorrow or pain from your mother’s absence. It was…lovely actually.
Soon, the car stopped outside Peggy Lamb’s triple decker apartment in Roxbury neighborhood. You hadn’t been there since you were thirteen for Thanksgiving. When, after your mother passed, Mary and Curtis invited both you and your father to dinner for the holiday. Then, just all of a sudden (much like Miss Crane’s Christmas parties), you stopped going.
“Here we are.” Mary announced.
“That’s an awful lot of stairs…” Your father trailed off.
“Probably icy too…”
Nope, not going to give your kissing buddy (what was Angus Tully to you? What were you to him?) a clue.
“Mr. Tully.”
“Right.” He nodded once he finally took the hint from your dad. He smiled. “Mary, can I help you with your bags?”
“Yes, please.” She smiled, and Angus got out of the car.
You leaned against Mary’s seat. “Mary, may I help you with your bags.”
“You may.”
You heard your father prod at just why you would want to go into the cold air and help Angus carry the bags but paid him no mind. You did though when it was Angus who asked.
“What’re you doing out here?” He popped the trunk.
“Mary asked me to help too.” You pulled out the large suitcase with all your strength. “She knew your noodle arms couldn’t handle it all.”
Scoffing, he took the hatbox and closed the trunk. “Seems like you’re handling it perfectly.”
“Of course, I am.” You did your best to hide the ache in your arms already forming as you led the way.
Mary, with her window rolled down, stopped you at the foot of the stairs. “Hey, why’s she carrying the suitcase?”
“She said she could handle it.” Angus replied.
“That’s not very gentlemanly of you.”
“Yeah, Angus.” You taunted as if him only carrying the box was his idea.
This was certainly not the first nor the last time you’d make his jaw drop from your wittiness. Sighing, he held out his hand for the suitcase, and you traded it for the hatbox.
“And be careful with the box,” Mary called your name. “Knowing you, you’ll drop it.”
You just stuck your tongue out playfully and continued up the stairs, Angus lugging the suitcase. “What do you think she packed in here, rocks?”
“I’d tell you, but you’d make a joke about how much women need to pack even though ‘We’re only here for a few days’.” You said in an accent that any man with low self-esteem would deem offensive.
He scoffed, stopping on the first floor. “Yeah, maybe.”
You tutted. “Ah, ah, ah, one more floor up.”
“What?”
“Peggy lives on the top floor.”
Angus sighed all the air that was left in his body before taking a deep breath. “I should’ve let you carry the damn bag.”
“But ya didn’t.” You smirked, leading him, once again, up the stairs.
When you both finally got to the top, you didn’t even need to knock on the door before Peggy and her husband came out to greet you.
“Oh, my goodness!” Peggy wrapped her arms around you once you set the box down. “It’s been too long.”
You laughed, hugging her back. “I know, I know. I’m sorry.”
She pulled away, but still holding your arms. “Never apologize, honey. And who’s this with you?”
Obviously, she was looking at the scraggly, 6’1 white boy behind you. Still, smiling, you introduced him.
“Angus; he goes to school at Barton and has been spending the holidays with us.”
“Aw,” Peggy shook his hand. “it’s nice to meet you.”
He nodded, grinning. “Nice to meet you too.”
“So,” she looked at you. “where’s that sister of mine?”
You tilted your head over ledge, and she and her husband walked over, waving and calling Mary’s name. Peggy turned back to you.
“Well, it’s been great seeing you again. If you ever need anything, you’re always welcome here.”
You nodded, smiling unwavering. “I’ll keep that in mind. Have a Happy New Year.”
She repeated the pleasantries and hugged you one final time before you and Angus started descending the stairs. When you passed by Mary, wishing her goodbye, she stopped you.
“Not yet, now you’ve gotta help me up there.”
“Oh yeah,” Angus offered her his arm. “sure thing.”
You resisted. “I already said hi to Peggy, am I excused?”
“I guess so.” She sighed as if you annoyed her.
Happy with her answer, you hugged her tightly and rushed into the front seat of the car, enjoying the warmth. In the corner of your eye, you saw your father arch his.
“You and Mr. Tully seem to be getting along finally.”
Glancing over, you nodded. “Yeah. He’s still a bit of an ass, but he’s not so bad.”
“What made you change your mind?”
“Time.” You shrugged, hoping your years of (somewhat) lying paid off. “I guess forcing us together for a week in the cold really helps.”
He hummed, turning back to look at the front as if there was anything eye-catching about the road. Thankfully, it didn’t take Angus that long to walk Mary up the stairs, and he was soon in the back of the car.
Your father drove into the city centre of Boston, and parked outside of the hotel you three would be staying at. Of course, you had a room all to yourself (although, you only had a single bed and not a twin, but you were happy nonetheless).
After twenty minutes of getting situated, the three of you went out to explore the city (a city the three of you had been to multiple times but was still just as beautiful as the first day you saw it). You went through more parks you could count, streets that almost all looked the same but still something unique about each of them; it was just nice enough to walk and talk with your companions.
“Alright,” your father lit his pipe after the three of you had lunch. “it’s about one-thirty right now, what’s one thing everyone want to do today?”
“I have two things.” You said.
“One for now, Josephine.”
“Brattle’s Books.”
“Very good, even though you already have too many. Mr. Tully, what about you?”
He shrugged. “Just ice skating, honestly.”
“Wow.” your father released his breath. “I must say, I am impressed with how simple both your suggestions are.”
“What do you wanna do?” You asked.
“The Museum of Fine Arts, of course.” He began walking. You and Angus sighed as if it was the worst convenience in the world. Your father defended. “Oh, quit your bellyaching, both of you! This is still technically a field trip. Okay, what’s the second thing you want to do?” He asked you.
“A milkshake and fries.”
“That’s it?” He wrinkled his nose. “That disgusting concoction, is it?”
“Yes, and it’s not disgusting, you’re just a picky eater.”
Angus chimed in. “It doesn’t sound that appealing.”
“Who asked you?” You questioned.
Your argument ended there as the three of you made the journey to Brattle’s Book Store. Just as you did in the car, you talked about nothing and everything at the same time; perhaps that’s why those little moments of transitioning matter the most to you.
When you made it to Brattle’s, you spent a little time inside the actual store, but more of it outside in the large empty space between the two buildings. It was like it was another floor on the old bookstore, several upon several shelves hugging the walls, and smaller ones creating aisles on the floor.
You primarily were by yourself, keeping a mental list of more books to buy for later, and lose yourself quickly in between the pages and old smell of them. You hadn’t even noticed it’d begun to snow until Angus was beside you.
“So, you’re telling me it couldn’t have snowed all the times we were indoors?” He joked.
You looked up. “Of course not, God’s angry at us.”
“Why?”
Smirking, you nudged him. “Kissing outside of wedlock.”
“The worst of all sins.” He played along.
“Above heresy, even.”
“Hi there handsome,” a woman’s voice penetrated the air. “got a cigarette?”
Neither of you wanted to turn around to see who she was talking to (or acknowledge her if she was talking to Angus). So, communicating with just one look, you stayed put.
“No, sorry. I smoke a pipe.”
Well, so much for staying still. At the sound of your father’s answer, both you and Angus turned slowly. A woman with red hair tied up in a messy bun wearing the ugliest shade of yellow and a raggedy fur coat graced your presence.
“How about a date, then?” She tried again. “You want a date?”
“No thank you.” He took the pipe out, smiling nervously.
“Oh, come on, let’s go somewhere warm!”
“Go ahead.” Angus teased. “We can wait here.”
Jaw on the floor, you couldn’t even say anything at first.
“See?” The woman stuck her hands in her pockets. “They can wait here, read some books. They don’t mind if daddy gets a little candy cane.”
“Thank you, but I never really liked candy canes.” Your father picked up a book. “Plus, I’m prediabetic.”
She scowled, and turned over her shoulder, leaving. Angus leaned over the bookshelf in between the two of you and your father.
“You know, if you do want a little candy cane, I won’t tell anyone.”
You swatted him, finally. “Stop trying to pimp out my father, you…you…”
“What?” He grinned from ear to ear. “What am I?”
“Papa, cover your ears.” You looked at him.
“Mister Tully,” he said instead. “for most people, sex is ninety-nine percent friction and one percent good-will. Call me old fashioned, but I place value on physical intimacy, and so should you two.”
“I never-!”
“-You know,” Angus interrupted. “if it wasn’t for your kid in front of me right now, I would’ve thought you never had sex.”
Again, you struck him; this time, enough to leave a bruise.
“Ow!” He cradled his arm.
“You know,” you used his words. “if it wasn’t for your mom sending you to private school, I would’ve thought you were a cheap, common whore.”
Instead of scolding you, your father laughed. It’s not as if he never did, it was always just...a rarity and almost a blessing to hear him be so carefree.
“Mr. Tully, cover my daughter’s ears, would you?”
Angus followed through and you let him.
“Believe it or not,” your father continued. “there was a time when the fire in my loins burned white hot.”
“You’re full of shit.” Angus snickered.
“No, the details would curl your toes.”
“Okay, then let’s hear.”
He shook his head. “Whatever happened between my wife and I is none of your business; especially our daughter’s.”
“She can’t hear anything.”
“Yes, I can.”
His hands left your ears, leading both men to laugh. Nothing more was (thankfully) said about your father and mother’s sex life. It was after another ten minutes outside when your father announced it was time to go; not before having to use the bookstore’s bathroom. So, that left you and Agnus by yourselves for the first time since arriving.
“You’re horrible.” You playfully kicked his feet.
“You hit me!”
“You deserved it. God, you’re such a man.”
He didn’t respond verbally. Instead, with a smile, he reached into his coat pocket and brought something out. In his hands, he held a somewhat worn copy of The Little Prince, and two different colored ribbons.
Freezing where you stood, you could only stare at them. “What’s this?”
“Merry Christmas.”
Looking up at him, your parted lips couldn’t form words to express just the…surprise of it all. So, Angus continued.
“I bought it; the book at least. I found it inside, asked your dad for the money so I could get it for you, and that was it. The-the ribbons, I got one that was your favorite color, but then I remembered my mom would talk about how there’s some colors that look better in a girl’s hair, so I got one I thought-.”
You threw your arms around Angus and held him so close to you people would think you were using him for warmth. He froze at first before immediately melting into your embrace. You brought his face down to yours, kissing the tip of his nose before pulling away and taking the gifts into your hands.
“Holy shit…you’re too sweet.” You giggled, flipping through the book.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “So, you like it?”
“I love it, you idiot.”
“And if you find the book at your house when you go back-.”
“-I’ll keep this one too.” you cut him off. “You’re thoughtful, you know that?”
Angus stuck his hands in his pockets, kicking the snow at his feet. “It’s nothing.”
“Fuck you, it’s everything.”
“Well,” he shrugged, smiling. “since you said it so eloquently.”
You rolled your eyes with a playful grin, then held up the colored ribbon he deemed (and was correct about) would look good in your hair. “Can you put this one on, please?”
“Uh, yeah,” he cleared his throat. “sure.”
You handed it to him, turning around. It wasn’t the first time he put his hands in your hair, but this time, with your back to him, it felt strange. Strange in a good way, but perhaps there wasn’t anything sensual about it, it felt that way.
And it was nice.
The feeling of it anyway; other than that, he had no idea what he was doing.
“What do you want it as?” He asked.
“Half-up, half-down.” You took a hair tie off your wrist, holding it our for him.
“What?”
“Like, instead of an actual ponytail, just make the top of my hair one, and leave the rest down.”
You didn’t even have to look at this man to know there was nothing going on inside his head trying to figure out what the hell you just said.
Thankfully, your father came out of the store.
“And what’s going on here?”
Angus looked over his shoulder. “I uh…”
“Step aside please, Mr. Tully.”
He did, and your father snatched the hair tie you were holding. “Half-up, half-down?”
“Yes, please.” You nodded.
“Do you know how to braid hair, Angus?” He asked, tying the hair tie around the ponytail he made.
“No.”
He hummed disapprovingly, sliding the ribbon into the hair tie and beginning to make a bow. “You should; it’s quite an important skill for a man.”
134 notes · View notes
lieslab · 4 months ago
Text
Here, always.
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꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎ ꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎
Pairing: Seungmin X gn reader
Summary: When insecurities loom overhead, you start up a conversation with your boyfriend that leads to reigniting your passion for singing.
Genre: Fluff
Word Count: 1.6K
A/N: Requestee, I hope you're having the best day ever. It was so nice to write some Seungmin fluffy stuff. It's been SO long since I've written some fluff. You didn't say fluff specifically, but the best route for this felt like fluff. I was giggling while writing the ending. Enjoy <3
_ _ _
It was the perfect moment and you wish it could last forever. Seungmin on one end of the couch and you curled up on the other. Your legs lazily hung over one another and you were both sharing an oversized violet blanket. The soft fleece kept both of you warm beneath it. 
“I can’t remember the last time I had a moment like this to catch my breath,” he started. “It’s really nice to just be here in this moment.” His hands were wrapped around a warm mug of lightly sweetened green tea.  
Yours was the opposite. Too much sugar, in Seungmin’s opinion. He made sure that he didn’t approve of it when you dumped in one spoonful and then another and then another and then another. Part of him was joking, but another part of him meant it. You sweetened the tea so much, he wasn’t sure if it was even green tea anymore. 
“Your legs are really warm.” 
“Duh, human bodies are usually warm. If you wanted to lay next to a cold body, you gotta kill me first. Good luck, sweetheart. Even if you wanted to kill me, you couldn’t.” 
“Is that a challenge?” You raised an eyebrow. 
“Try me. One splash of this steaming tea and you’re going to be screaming and sobbing. A single thump of this porcelain mug to your head and you’d be down for the count.” 
“Harsh,” you mumbled with a frown. 
“Well, if you’re going to try to kill me, I need to defend myself somehow.” He glanced behind his shoulder and looked back at you. “If that doesn’t stop you,” his head jerked back, “that lamp certainly will.” 
Just the thought of the stained glass shade slamming into your skull made you wince. You shook your head and took another sip of your tea. “You can stay alive another day.” 
“I thought so.” 
Your eyes went back over to the lamp behind him. A few weeks ago, the two of you went thrift shopping and it was there that you found the lamp. It was perfect for the living room. It was just the right size to sit on the end table and when it turned on, the warm yellow bulb made the room feel warm and fuzzy. 
The reflecting patterns from the ruby red and indigo glass stamped the ceiling above. The evening you turned it on, it felt like your living room turned into another world. Somewhere peaceful and cozy, the perfect melodic feeling filled you every time you sprawled out on the couch and read a book. 
“So…” you spoke up.
“So?” Seungmin glanced up over the top of the green mug. “So what? What do you want? Ruining my peace and quiet, I see.” 
You threw your head back with a whine. Your fingers clutched the half-empty cup tighter. “Seungmin!” 
“I’m just kidding, geez! What do you want?” 
“I have a question.” 
“The caller you are trying to reach is unavailable. Please leave a message after the tone an-” He stopped when you shot him a glare. “Fine. What is it?” 
You jerked back up, wiggled to get comfortable, and moved your cup over to the coffee table. “In the very beginning, before you became a member of Stray Kids and before you debuted, did you ever doubt your ability to become a singer?” 
“Did I doubt my ability?” He raised an eyebrow. 
You nodded. A soft pitter-pattering began to fill the air and you glanced over to the glass sliding door. Quick drops of rain came down like sheets as they pelted the grass. 
“Sometimes, I did. How could I not? I didn’t know I was going to become an idol. The survivor show was difficult and there were a lot of people with good voices. I knew my voice was decent, but I didn’t know if it was good enough.” 
“Some days, I still have my moments where I doubt my abilities. I can’t hit a note or I have a cold and it messes up my voice when I’m trying to record for a new album. Sometimes I find myself getting frustrated and I keep asking myself if it’s worth it, but then I think about my favorite moment.”
“What is it?” You subconsciously leaned your body forward to soak up his words. 
“When I’m on the stage and I’m staring into the crowd, I get looked at like I’m the entire world. There’s an awe in people’s eyes and I find that it’s irreplaceable. There’s so much energy you gain from that and it makes everything worth it.” 
“When you have a passion,” he continued, “it’s called a passion for a reason. You don’t start it and then give up. Everyone has frustrations and some days, yes they are awful and it makes you want to stop everything, but then you have those days that you can’t put into words.” A faint smile appeared on his face.
“When your family members look at you with admiration. When the people you’re singing with smile at you because you just achieved hitting a note that you struggled with. When you’re with your voice instructor and they don’t have to remind you to fix your pitch, you naturally do it; those are all the building blocks to achieving your goals.” 
“Think of some of the top musicians in the world. Do you think everyone was born with the power to sing?” He shook his head. “Maybe they were average, but average people have the potential to become better. We all have the power to be unstoppable if we put in the effort.” 
You soaked in every word. You watched the way he speaked, the way his lips quipped up during certain pronunciations. The way his hands gestured and he pointed to himself. 
“Did I doubt my abilities? Always, but you know what? The idea of maybe one day never making it to the stage, never making something of myself, I hated that. To me, that was always impossible, it wasn’t an option, so I kept pushing.” 
“I kept going and going and going because I was so determined. It makes it a hell of a lot easier when you have supporters around you. Every time I heard a compliment, it fueled the fire within me. Every time someone said I couldn’t do it, I refused to take that. I was determined to do whatever it took to prove myself.” 
“Did you ever burn yourself out?” You interrupted softly. 
“Sometimes, yeah. I pushed myself too hard and I was exhausted. It took a while to build myself back up from that. When I got burnt out via singing, I took my attention elsewhere. Singing and music go hand and hand, so I focused on writing lyrics. Even if I’m not singing, there are always ways that I can musically enhance myself.” 
You couldn’t help it, you found yourself tearing up. When Seungmin realized it, he leaned over and placed his mug beside yours on the wooden table. “Why are you crying?” 
“Lately, I find myself getting insecure and being burnt out,” you weakly managed to push out. “I just…I want it so bad and yet I find myself getting stuck.” You shrugged and reached up and brushed your cheeks. “It’s really silly and I’m sorry.” 
“No, no, no. Come here, don’t apologize.” He reached forward with his arms and tugged you towards him. He shoved the blanket aside, pulled you into his arms, and wrapped you closer. You pulled the blanket back over the two of you. 
“What are you struggling with? I told you that you could tell me about anything.” 
“It’s really stupid,” you mumbled, trying to get out of telling him. 
“Don’t test me, I’ll keep you here until you tell me.” His arms wrapped tighter around your waist. “Just tell me what it is.” 
“Singing.” 
“Wait, you’re a singer?” His eyes widened in shock. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why have I never heard you singing? What? Huh? Since when? Oh my god, tell me more!” 
“You’re being dramatic,” you laughed. A sniffle came out and you continued talking. “My voice isn’t anything like yours and I-” 
“Who gives a shit? I would hope your voice doesn’t sound like mine. Do you know how tired I get of hearing my own voice? You gotta sing for me now.” 
“I don’t wanna, I said I was burnt out.” 
“Right, right. Okay, so you take a break for a while and then you can try again. I’ll be here and I’ll hold your hand. You’re really lucky because you have me. You can take vocal lessons from me and everyone will be so jealous.” 
You playfully rolled your eyes. “Yeah, sure. That means you have to do extra work and you’re always so busy.” 
“Hey! I can always make time for you! I’m offering you my services, but not for free.” 
“What’s the fee?” 
“Kisses.” 
“Meh,” you shrugged, “seems like a pretty high price.” 
“Hey!” His fingers dug into your sides as he began to tickle you. You squirmed and laughed loudly. When he stopped, he grabbed the bottom of your chin and pulled you closer to his own face. 
Your lips caught his. The sugary sweetness of your lips was overpowering against him. It coated every crevice and caused his heart to gallop in his chest. He could practically feel the sugar rush as he pulled away slightly. 
His forehead rested against your own and his eyes met yours. Your cheeks flushed red, but he didn’t care. “I’m here for you and rooting for you, always.” 
“Always?” You whispered. 
“Always.”
| ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ |
Taglist: @lina-linny @straykidsstanforeverandever @seungnishi @stellasays45
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verkomy · 1 year ago
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okay so I’m rereading the hobbit and I want to make a list of my favorite quotes and parts so here we go:
“bilbo (…) got something a bit queer in his make-up from the took side” I chuckled
“mr. baggins was very fond of flowers” of course he was he’s a blorbo
“it was a beautiful golden harp, and when thorin struck it the music began all at once, so sudden and sweet that bilbo forgot everything else” bombastic side eye
“as he lay in bed he could hear thorin still humming to himself in the best bedroom next to him. bilbo went to sleep with that in his ears, and it gave him very uncomfortable dreams” criminal offensive side eye
“the explanation did not seem to explain” my brain 24/7 (but also when someone’s trying to explain the rules of any board game to me)
“bilbo was wearing a dark-green hood and a dark-green cloak borrowed from dwalin. they were too large for him, and he looked rather comic” bilbo in dwarven clothes, just throwing it out there
“bilbo baggins, a bur — a hobbit,” said poor bilbo, shaking all over, and wondering how to make owl-noises before their throttled him” this one made me laugh
“trolls simply detest the very sight of dwarves (uncooked)” this one too
“his house was perfect, whether you liked food, or sleep, or work, or story-telling, or singing, or just sitting and thinking best, or a pleasant mixture of them all” I want to go to there
“dori, who was at the back next to bilbo, and a decent fellow. he made the hobbit scramble on his shoulders as best as he could with his tied hands, and then off they all went at a run. (…) that sent them on faster than ever, and as poor bilbo could not possibly go half as fast, they took it in turn to carry him on their backs” WE WERE ROBBED
“why, o why did I ever leave my hobbit-hole!” said poor mr. baggins bumping up and down on bombur’s back “why, o why did I ever bring a wretched little hobbit on a treasure hunt!” said poor bombur” comedic duo
gandalf answered angrily “I brought him, and I don’t bring things that are of no use” we love a supportive friend
“(gandalf) gave bilbo a queer look from under his bushy eyebrows” live gandalf reaction
“you ought not to be rude to an eagle, when you are only the size of a hobbit” good life advice
“here they sat on wooden benches while gandalf began his tale, and bilbo swung his dangling legs and looked at the flowers in the garden” a short king <3
“that only makes eleven and not fourteen, unless wizards count differently to other people” I LOVE BOOK BEORN SO MUCH and this whole chapter is probably my favorite by far
“the hobbit felt quite crushed, and as there seemed nothing else to do he did go to bed” what a mood
“long noses are sometimes useful you see” do with that information what you want
“they knew only too well that they would soon all have been dead, if it had not been for the hobbit; and they thanked him many times” AS THEY SHOULD, too bad thorin didn’t see any of what happened
“he did not like being dependent on by everyone, and he wished he had the wizard at hand” honestly, same
“never laugh at live dragon, bilbo you fool” another hopeful advice
“you are more worthy to wear the armour of elf-princes than many that have looked more comely in it. but wonder if thorin oakenshield will see it too” ouch
“then bilbo turned away, and he went by himself, and sat alone wrapped in a blanket, and, whether you believe it or not, he wept until his eyes were red and his voice was hoarse” this one hurts
“he was in fact held by all the hobbits of the neighbourhood to be queer” of course he was :D
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apomaro-mellow · 23 days ago
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Two in the Bush 3
Part 2
Robin hadn’t stopped laughing and Steve was worried for her lungs. He also just wished she’d stop laughing at his expense. What had happened at the dinner was weird enough as is.
“So let me-let me get this straight”, Robin took a deep breath before continuing. “You were ready to totally let them off the hook. You didn’t even want alimony payments or anything and they-”, she paused to snicker and cover her eyes with her hands and fall back onto the couch. “And they-they took it as a challenge. And now you have not one, but TWO thick headed alphas trying to be your baby daddy?”
Steve sighed. “Eeyup. That’s a pretty nice summary.”
“Did they at least pay for your food?”
“They fought over who got to pay for my food. Like literally butting heads about it.”
Robin snorted. “Like rams?”
“Exactly like rams! It’s like they think I’ll choose whoever has the biggest horns.” Steve opened up a notebook and began to jot some things down.
“What’re you writing?”, Robin asked.
“Baby names. My little bundle will be here before I know it”, Steve said, patting his belly.
“Don’t you think you have more important things to figure out right now? Like which of these guys you’re gonna raise that little bundle with?”
Steve rolled his eyes as he sat on the floor and placed the notebook onto the coffee table. “I’ve always liked Aurora. And Ben. Ben’s such a cute name.”
“Steve, I think they’re serious.”
“But they’re not! Billy told me from the get-go he’s not raising any pups and Eddie…” Well, Eddie had never said it, but still. “They don’t really wanna be fathers. They’re just feeling like they have to prove something because I said they couldn’t.”
“Well, you laid down the challenge.”
“And they couldn’t even keep it together long enough to pay the bill! I made it clear to them right then that if they wanted anything to do with this pup, they have to get along. At least until I’m far enough for a DNA test to be done.”
Robin sat up and then slid off the couch to get down on the floor with Steve. “And you think the other will just bow out gracefully?”
Steve snorted, thinking of the clumsiness of Eddie’s gangly limbs and the rough movements that accompanied Billy’s muscles. Nothing they ever did was graceful. 
“What else are they gonna do? Hang around and help out with a kid that’s not theirs?”
Steve couldn’t even imagine what it would look like to have both Eddie and Billy getting along with each other. They’d just met and were already comparing dick sizes. And Steve was just supposed to believe that they could do this together? Steve had been dreaming of this. Buying little baby clothes, picking out the perfect name, holding his pup for the first time. The idea of having two alphas arguing the whole nine months wasn’t a part of his fantasy.
And Steve went ahead and started on that journey, starting with making a list of names. He didn’t even hear from either possible baby daddy until about a week later, when there was a knock on the door.
Steve went to answer and was shocked to see both alphas. He was less shocked to see them both sporting a black eye. But definitely more shocked to see a finished crib between them.
“What? How? Why are you-here? With a crib? What is this?”
“Mommy makes the baby, Daddy makes the crib”, Billy said.
“And your eyes?” Steve looked back and forth between them.
Eddie shrugged. “We got a little…I mean we had a little trouble with the crib. You know how it is when you gotta assemble something.”
“We would’ve finished sooner if this guy knew how to read”, Billy said.
“Or you if you actually owned a decent toolbox set”, Eddie countered.
“Back up, back up”, Steve said. “You both built this crib?”
“Yeah”, Billy said. “Now move out the way so we can bring it in.”
Steve did just that, body on autopilot from how dumbfounded he was. They brought the crib in, Billy leading the way and Eddie carrying the other end. Steve took a good look at it and had to admit it was well made. Sturdy, yet comfy looking. And not a nail or screw out of place.
“Where do ya want it, boss?”, Eddie asked.
“Uh, you can just put it in my room for now”, Steve said. 
He followed behind them as they carried it up the stairs and placed it at the foot of Steve’s bed. Once they did, Steve came over and his hands touched the crib lightly. Suddenly it was all so real. He was having a baby. And it would get to sleep every night in this crib until they got old enough for a child’s bed. Steve sniffed and looked at the other men, sporting shiners. 
He looked at how Billy’s eyes were shifting and his arms were crossed, making himself look smaller. Eddie was fidgeting with the rings on his fingers and shifting his weight from foot to foot.
“Thank you. Both of you.” He turned to face them fully. “But if this is gonna work, you need to do better than this.” He brought a hand up to each of their faces. Whoever the father was, Steve didn’t want their baby’s first look at them to be of a bruised face.
Billy grumbled but Eddie turned his face into Steve’s hand and kissed his palm. “Whatever you say, babylove.”
Steve smiled and leaned in close to Eddie, kissing his lips softly. It lasted for just a second because that was when his hand started to slip off of Billy’s face and the other alpha pulled him back over to him. Billy’s hand held Steve’s tightly and his arm came around his waist.
“Don’t I deserve a reward too?”
“Oh? You think so?”, Steve teased. Then he felt the warmth and weight of Eddie at his back.
“I think we both deserve a little somethin’. Men at work were we. And we didn’t even hoot at any babes.”
Steve almost wondered if this was their plan from the beginning but knew they weren’t nearly in sync that much. Still, when he felt Billy’s hands dip to his waist and Eddie’s breath in his ear, he could imagine it easily. Both of them moving in perfect unity-
“Okay, enough of that!”, Steve pushed them both away. “Your reward is I’m giving you both ice for your eyes and making you sandwiches. That’s it.” 
He hurried out of his room and back downstairs before he started something he couldn’t finish. He was a single alpha that didn’t need any alpha. That was his story and he was sticking to it.
Part 4
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spnbabe67 · 17 days ago
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I Know You're Shitty And You're Bad For Me But I Can't Stop Thinking About It
Kinktober Day 14: Shower Sex (B.B)
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Pairing: Billy Butcher x Original Female Character
Warnings: Smut, Shower Sex, mentions of being homeless, incredibly brief mention of violence
Summary: When Samarra can't sleep, her go-to remedy is a hot shower. But she isn't as quiet as she thinks
Word Count: 2074
Authors Note: Title from the song If You Think I'm Pretty by Artemas. Why are there so few quality GIFs of him??? Also, I was half tempted to name this fic "It's Raining Men".
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Samarra didn’t hate the apartment. It was cramped, sure, living with 5 other people, so the bathroom was the only place she could get some goddamn privacy. The lock was busted on the door, but it wasn’t like the others were keen on walking in on her; Hughie had, once, when they all moved in here from out of the Haitian Kings HQ. The poor boy had been traumatized, both by walking in on her naked and nearly getting a bullet in his brain. Butcher had looked equal parts disturbed and impressed when Samarra mentioned she kept a pistol on top of her clothes. She’d shrugged, saying that you could never be too careful; after all, they were being hunted by Supes.
The water pressure was decent and as long as she got to shower before M.M., there was usually enough hot water. Considering she was up before all of them and the last one in bed, the supply of hot water wasn’t usually an issue. Besides, as the one who paid most of the utilities, Samarra decided she could use as much of the hot water as she pleased.
Everyone else was asleep, or so Samarra figured. It was late enough in the night to be considered early morning when she gave up on trying to toss and turn in the little twin sized bed. With Hughie sneaking, or what he thought was sneaking, out to see Annie, her and Butcher had claimed the bedroom. M.M. really hadn’t protested to it, much to Samarra’s surprise. At this point she felt bad for Butcher, who’d fallen asleep next to her after one of their late night escapades. He wasn’t awake, but she knew her constant moving around wasn’t exactly facilitating the level of sleep that he needed. Samarra sighed, dragging her hand down her face as she glanced over at Butcher, snoring softly beside her. God, I wish I could sleep that well. She gingerly got out of bed, the floor cold against the bottoms of her feet.
Samarra cringed as one of the floorboards creaked under her weight. She glanced over her shoulder, relaxing a bit as Billy seemed to still be in the throws of sleep. She grabbed a change of clothes from her bag, only the muted rustling of fabric indicated her movements. The one thing she did miss from living on her own, if it was only out of homeless shelters and gym bathrooms, was her fluffy towels. It was the small luxuries that had kept her going before she met Frenchie, and by extension the rest of The Boys, like her towels. But those had been long since abandoned, probably still in a trash bag by the side of the road after fleeing the last place she lived, so the scratchy, plain black towels supplied by group funding it was. Samarra folded her clothes, catching the open toilet seat before she set them down. She rolled her eyes. Men. 
Her clothes pooled around her ankles in ripples of cotton and linen. Samarra shivered as the ambient air hit her naked body, skin riddled with goosebumps. She cranked the dial to almost the hottest setting, the old pipes rattling as water flowed through them to pour from the shower head. Samarra hissed as the scalding hot water hit her back and shoulders, but quickly the sting faded to a pleasant warmth bringing life back to her chilled and aching muscles. She tipped her head back, letting the spray soak her silver hair, pouring over her shoulders to trail down the front of her. Steam quickly enveloped the room as Samarra dragged her fingers through her hair, making sure the strands were soaked through.
She and Kimiko both shared toiletries. Butcher had gotten this, fruity and sickeningly sweet smelling shampoo and body wash set as a joke, but Samarra refused to let it go to waste. It was another small luxury she missed. She never in a hundred years would have picked the cherry blossom and passionfruit scented soap, but it was what they had and she wasn’t going to toss it simply because she didn’t like it. The citrusy scent wafted around her as she lathered the soap into her hair, scrubbing the grime and sweat away. She’d always found solace in bathing. The ritual of it solid and relatively unchanging. There was a time where a shower in and of itself was a luxury, especially one with some semblance of privacy. After everything she’d done in her lifetime, hell the last 6 months, Samarra needed it as a way of cleansing herself, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. She wasn’t religious, but a hot shower was as close to repentance for her actions as it got for her. As if washing away the dirt, sweat and oftentimes blood could make up in any way for the things she’d done.
One, two, one, three. Soft knocks sounded at the door, barely audible over the pounding of the water. It was a code her and Butcher had come up with on a mission. She had infiltrated an office building where their intel had indicated Vought was keeping some files on the Supe’s they’d been dosing and she was supposed to let him and Frenchie in after everyone else at the office had left. Butcher had claimed that ‘How else is she supposed to know that its them at the door and not some random twat lookin’ for a fix?’ Samarra had shrugged, not caring either way. Leave it to Butcher to overcomplicate some things and under complicate others.
Seconds passed and Samarra heard the faintest click of the door shutting before the curtain pulled away, Butcher sliding into the shower with her. His hands landed heavy on her hips, making to switch so he was under the spray but flinched away as the water hit his skin.
“Bloody hell, woman.” Butcher growled, reaching around her to turn the temperature down. “Gonna boil alive in ‘ere.”
“Pussy.” Samarra teased, shuffling around so the water ran down Butcher’s body, soaking into his hair and beard and running down his body. 
Samarra couldn’t help the way her eyes followed the path of the water down his body, feeling the temperature in the room grow incrementally hotter as the tension between them grew taut. Butcher wormed his hand to tangle in her hair, tipping her head back up to make her eyes catch his again. The heat in his eyes reflected her own, desire and lust blowing his pupils wide.
“What are you doin’ to me, Mara?” Billy mumbled before he used his grip on her hair to bring her lips to his.
Samarra let her eyes flutter shut into the kiss. His lips moved against hers like molasses, his grip on her hips purely possessive as he pulled her front flush against him. She opened her mouth to him, letting him take control of the kiss as her hands wandered across his body. She caressed her hands along the soft planes of him, across his broad chest and even broader shoulders, feeling how his softness gave way to hard muscle underneath; it reminded her just how strong and unyielding he could be. Eventually her hands found home in his hair, brushing through the transition from the coarse, curly hair of his beard into the softer, finer strands adorning his head. 
She gasped as the cold tile of the shower pressed into her back as Billy pinned her to it, having her retreating closer to the warmth beating off of his body and from the shower. Butcher took advantage of the momentary distraction, sweeping his tongue into her mouth. Samarra rolled her hips against him as he grew hard against her tummy, reaching down to run her hand over his length, stroking him to full hardness. Butcher growled against her mouth as she lazily pumped her hand, twisting her wrist as she did. Samarra nipped at his lower lip, grasping at his shoulders to steady herself as Butcher slid his hands down her sides, cupping her ass to lift her off the ground. She wrapped her legs around his waist, steadied by the slowly warming shower wall at her back and Billy practically pinning her to it with his hips. 
Samarra kissed him sloppily, all tongue and teeth and noses crashing together, greedily drinking him down. Samarra silently thanked whatever gods or supernatural beings were out there that Butcher wasn’t a selfish lover as he slipped his hand between them, sliding a thick finger through her folds to toy at her clit adding fuel to the growing fire he’d lit in her belly. Samarra’s breath hitched at the first nudge of him against her entrance. Their kiss only broke as her mouth dropped open as Billy thrusted shallowly, slowly working his cock into her. Her forehead rested against his as she glanced down, watching him slide in and out of her, working himself in and in until he was fully seated inside her. 
Butcher cursed in a long, drawn out breath as her inner walls fluttered around his cock. Samarra captured his lips again, granting him leave to move. He pulled out almost completely before resheathing himself in one smooth stroke that had her choking on a moan that was swallowed by his mouth. 
“I know it feels good, but we gotta be quiet lovey.” Butcher mumbled between kisses and Samarra groaned in protest but complied, knowing he was right. The last thing they needed was M.M. or Frenchie walking in thinking someone was being hurt. 
Samarra dug her nails into his back, digging them into his shoulders as his short thrusts rocked her back against the wall every time his hips crashed into hers. That calloused thumb of his still made quick, small circles on her clit, spurring her on. That gentle, arousing sensation added to the amalgam of factors that had her barreling for that high. Samarra held Butcher close to her, her peaked nipples rubbing against the patch of hair on his chest, the steady rhythm of his cock sliding in and out of her shoving her over that edge. She shuddered in Butchers arms, her orgasm shooting down her spine, making her legs go lazy around his hips. His mouth muffled the satisfied moan she couldn’t hold back as he rutted into her fast and hard, chasing his own high. Butcher gently set her on her feet, a hand on her hip steadying her as he pumped himself raggedly until he came, his cum leaking out of his cock and into the shower. Billy kissed her languidly, his hand rubbing up and down her side to re regulate their systems. 
Samarra smirked against his lips. “You gonna keep distracting me or can I finish my shower?” 
Butcher arched a brow at her. “And here I was thinking you enjoyed my company.” 
Samarra opened her mouth to volley his jest but Butcher simply held up a finger, gesturing her to turn around. Confusion had her furrowing her brows, but she complied, turning away from him. She flinched as the softness of her washcloth brushed against her shoulder. 
She glanced over her shoulder. “What’re you-”
“Shush and let me do this.” Butcher cut her off.
Samarra mentally shrugged, closing her eyes to savor the feeling of Butcher dragging the washcloth across her back and shoulders. Once he was satisfied with that, he moved onto her arms, then her torso, then her legs after that. He was surprisingly gentle with his ministrations, which by itself didn’t surprise her. What did was the fact that he was gentle with her. She had never expected him to be gentle with her, he hadn’t been thus far. It wasn’t unwelcome, just, unusual. 
He let her rinse herself off, retreating out of the shower while she did to grab both of their towels. Once they were both dry, Samarra having pulled on her t-shirt and panties, Butcher opting to wear nothing at all, they climbed back into bed. Samarra snuggled into the sheets, Butcher curling himself around her from behind; it was like a big, warm teddy bear had settled behind her, wrapping its arms around her torso.
Only the sound of their collective breathing and the low hum of the A/C filled the air for the next several minutes until Butcher spoke, his tone an annoyed grumble.
“I hate that bloody shampoo.”
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fan-goddess · 1 year ago
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His pretty muse {3)
Pairing: Modern!Aegon Targaryen x reader
Summary: Aegon finds what he thinks is love simply by looking through his camera lens. The only issue is, you don’t know how much he truly admires your beauty and how much he comes to crave you
Warnings: Dark themes mentioned, masterbation, pervy!aegon, talk of male oral, (any I missed let me know)
Story Taglist: @jamespotterismydaddy, @chompchompluke, @flrboyd, @teazlic, @sajida-cameron, @valeskafics,
Author Note: If you wish to be added to the taglist then please comment. If you wish to be taken out of it then say that here aswell. If it’s in bold I am unable to tag you
Other Chapters: one, two, three,
Other links: My Pretty Muse Masterlist
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Aegon doesn’t regret a thing when he wakes up that morning and uses you as a way to rid himself of his morning wood. His hand finds itself sliding under the thin blanket he slept in last night and grips himself tightly. Your name is muttered like a prayer under his breath as his head goes back to those images of you last night.
He knows he could easily just go get his laptop to look at the pictures more clearly, but he’s way to lazy to go and grab it even if it’s only a few steps away. Besides, he’s already moved on from thinking of those photos to thinking of scenarios of you in such scandalous positions it’d make the maiden blush. His favourite by far, and the one that makes him cum, is the thought of you on your knees in-front of him looking up at him through your lashes while you struggle to take all of him in your mouth.
He grabs a random sock on the side of his bed and wipes himself down when he’s finished, before trailing to the shower and blasting himself in some cold water. After he dries himself off he debates on what to wear to take you on a supposed tour of the town, but to be perfectly honest, he knows jack shit apart from a spot that famous for suicides. Though he honestly doubts he’ll be able to weave that fact in without making you run for your perfect fucking family…
He decides on some butt ugly polo shirt he accidentally stole of his brother years ago when he left. It’s slightly tight on him cause of how bigger he’s gotten practically living of fish and chips, but hey, anything for his girl right? He even puts some weird conditioner thing in his hair before ultimately rethinking about how freakishly like his brother he became in that moment. “Like a god damn vampire…” he giggles slightly when he looks at himself in the mirror, before sticking his head under the tap and rinsing it to start all over again.
He’s eventually done though, and walks to the direction of your house with his hands in his trouser pockets and his camera tucked away on his desk, for once by on him. He refuses to scare you away just yet, even though the thought kind of excites him. He even whistles a part of a song he heard walking past a house with an open window. He thinks it’s called pumped up kicks or something like that.
When he gets to your house, he finally gets a chance to look at it in the sunlight. It’s a decent sized bungalow, but the paintwork is fucking ghastly. It’s supposed to be a golden yellow, a colour he knew well in his former life, yet here it’s changed into some sickly jaundice piss stained yellow. If you ever ask if he wants to help with housework, he’s starting with this whether you agree with him or not.
The house he can hear has already come alive with people. Children’s screams and adults shouting echo of the house in waves. He even hears his own ‘name’ shouted. “Sissy your lover boy is here for you!”
It almost brings a sort of smile to his face when he knocks, and the chaos within seems to get ten times louder. He hears you most clearly. Demanding your parents/grandparents to keep the kids away from the town that day so you can’t run into them, with the whining of the kids following swiftly afterwards. You come out a couple minutes later. Your cheeks are red with he assumes is embarrassment yet his head can’t help but think of the possible reasons for having red cheeks.
“Sorry about them. My family’s kinda annoyed I’m not going with them on this stupid walk they planned, yet gave no one else a heads up on about until this morning-“ Usually he finds himself wanting to smack ramblers who can’t get to the point. Yet while you do so he can’t help but find it cute and endearing. He hears you talk but he doesn’t really listen, cause all he can think while you’re doing it is how cute you are. Your hands are moving in time with your voice. When it rises, your hands rise too. It’s an awfully funny thing to witness not that he’s noticed it.
He doesn’t even realise that the two of you are walking though while he pretends to listen to you. Yet your sudden direction of voice brings him out of this little bubble he made just for you. “I thought you said about giving me a tour?” You giggled as you spoke, yet when you raised your eyebrow almost daringly you somehow manage to turn something so perfectly innocent, into something so damn seductive.
“Well sorry princess. Kinda got caught up in your story. I mean, what is a guy supposed to focus on when a beautiful womans talking to him? Not give her attention? Now that’s just cruel of him.” His fuckboy charm doesn’t seem to have any problem coming back to him. Even after a couple years of not using it it seems he still has the swagger. It practically roars in remembrance when you blush at the compliment.
“Wow you’re a real charmer aren’t you PM…” That fucking nickname mixed with the fucking smile you have, it nearly makes him pop a boner there and then.
“Hell yeah I am princess.” It’s a simple response mixed with a simple lazy wink, yet that combo seemed to make you react the most. Your face turns a light pink and your mouth moulds itself into a bashful smile. It’s got to be one of his best works yet he’s got to say.
The walk he hadn’t even realised they were on continues. He halfheartedly talks about the buildings they pass, playing into that tour guide thing he said he’d do but had no intention of actually doing. He makes sure to put in his own personal spin to it though. He makes sure to say stories about the people who live their or frequent there.
“A man named Paul lives there. He’s goes absolutely fucking mental when you step on his grass. Parently he sprayed some little kids with his hose a couple years ago when they played on it. Even gave one a bloody nose cause they fell down getting sprayed or some shit.”
“No!” You gasped. It goes on like that for around an hour. Just him and you messing about discussing gossip about people like the weird women at his mothers boring as fuck book club.
Whilst he’s in the middle of the rumour on one of the fisherman shagging the fish however, you stop, and when he looks back you’ve got a massive grin on your face.
“Something wrong pretty girl?” He asks. It’s strange, as he both does and doesn’t mean the sentimental tone behind it. You don’t respond immediately, only pointing to something behind him with that grin still on your face.
When he turns around, the memory of it hits him like a freight train. It’s an ice cream shop, and he said he’d buy you an ice cream. An internal panic hits him suddenly. What if he has no money on him? Would you think he’s poor for not having any money on him? (Even though he knows he technically is no doubt) or would you pity him and try and play a sympathy card?
While you walk to the entrance, his hands frantically shake and pull at any and all of his pockets, and low and behold the faint sigh of relief when his hand clasps on a lim forgotten twenty pound note hidden away. His footsteps slap against the hard shop as he enters and finds you grinning with rosy cheeks waiting for him.
“You already know what you want princess?” He asks.
“I’m thinking vanilla. It’s basic but a classic.” You ponder. When he looks at the flavours he remembers why he never comes in here. He’s an indecisive little shit.
“Good choice!” The kid behind the counter smiles. It’s obvious the kids not entirely thrilled to be there. The smiles too forced and the eyes look way to dull. Even the way he spoke the generic saying Aegon would bet his boss told him to say, was as if the freaking Terminator voiced him. And the cherry on top, the kids name tag says his names Geoffrey. What kind of sick fuck names there kid Geoffrey in this time? Sociopaths from the fucking thirties, that’s who.
When you turn to him, the kids eyes seem to droop down to look at your tits, and it takes everything in him not to leap over that counter and beat him till he’s unconscious with that stupid ice cream scooper he’s holding.
“Hey kid” The attentions of the tits now, and the kid can no doubt see the anger in his eyes. “I’ll get a vanilla too. In a tub, not a cone though.”
He can already feel the judgment radiating off in waves. Reflecting off the once vibrant now sickly shade of yellow of the ice cream parlour walls. The two of you don’t have to wait long till the kids calling for the two of you, as unsurprisingly enough, no one wants to go in the piss coloured ice cream parlour.
When he walks outside, holding the door open for you like from some stupid romcom movie his sister always raved on, he leads you to an old bench overlooking some trees. It’s like one of those things old married couples do. Sit on an old bench no doubt dedicated to some old person and feed the ducks.
Before the two of you have even sat down, he’s already ditched the pathetic pink plastic spoon the kid gave him. So instead, he uses his preferred method of eating ice cream. Holding the tub to his lips and licking it straight from the tub. He can feel your eyes watching him. Though whether it was from the way he was eating it or the tub itself he has no idea.
“Oh princess your staring” he practically sings. From the corner of his eye he sees your head quickly turn back to your own food and lick it a couple times. It takes everything in him to not groan out loud when he eagerly watched you kitten lick the white liquid that already begun to drip down your hand from the heat.
The silence between him and yourself though he finds is strange nice. Every so rarely often with the move of his arm his elbow brushes against your own arm, and Aegon has to stop himself every time from obsessing in his mind over the small contact.
Eventually the sun gets to his ice cream, leaving the dessert to pool in his cup. So he does what any sane person would do. He tilts it back and drinks it like a shot. He can see your head turn to him while he does this, the slurping sound not silent in anyway whatsoever. When he’s done and wipes whatever remnants stayed on his face he hears a little giggle coming from his left. A little giggle coming from you.
Aegon turns to you with a lazy grin. Mainly to tease you about the giggle, yet his gaze seems to zero in on a small dollop of ice cream that hangs in the corner of your mouth. He can’t even find himself able to look away. The once lazy grin he can feel fade as his hand moves with a mind of its own to wipe away at the white stuff with his thumb. It doesn’t end there, as he next licks at that very same thumb to get rid of the ice cream while making direct eye contact with you.
“Sorry…” He awkwardly smiles. Deep inside, he knows damn well he doesn’t mean the apology. He’d probably do it again if it meant he could touch you over and over. He’s probably even lick the remnants straight of your skin if you asked him to.
“It’s okay” you still someone manage to smile so cutely with a blush that’s taken your face hostage. “Why do you do that? Eat ice cream with a tub?”
Aegons never really had to think about it. Even though no one ever asked. Maybe it was cause he always hung about with the sheep kids in school. The ones who only hung onto your every word cause you had more money than them, and by the seven did he have a lot. “I’ve never had a cone before. Plus It always seems to go soggy whenever ice creams there for too long and all I can think about when I see it is wet cardboard.”
“Okay.” That’s all you say? Okay! Where’s the judgement?! Where’s the calling him a weirdo?! Where’s the normal human response?
“You don’t think it’s weird?” He’s insecurity creeps up on him as his nail gets pushed further into his palm. It’s a bad habit yes, learnt straight from mother dearest, but it distracts him from the humiliation with a nice feeling of pain. So why stop when he’s having fun?
“We all have our preferences, and you just have yours. Who am I to judge?” You say with a shrug as you go back to eating your cone. It’s simple how you said it. It was so simple and short. Yet why does he feel like he’s having a heart attack?
Aegon doesn’t speak for the rest of the ice cream part of the, is it a date? Do you count it as a date? He probably would count it as a date but only if you-
“You okay?” It’s your voice that brings him out of whatever mind melt he just went through. Yet he could never tell you that. If there’s one thing he got beat into him, men don’t show emotion. Or at least that’s what he was taught and shown anyway.
“I’m fine princess.” Again, the fuckboy smile comes out and is rewarded with a blush. His heart goes fast at the sight of it. It beats even fast when there’s more white ice cream on the corner of your lip, slowing dripping down the side of your mouth. If there’s a god out there, he’s currently torturing him.
It’s only worse for him when this time, you feel the ice cream and lick it away with your tongue. The sight of it makes his pants stir.
“What now- oh shit!” The shocked face you make leaves his head spinning. He turns his head a couple times to see if it’s something around the two of you which made you act so… surprised, but there’s no one but him and you, as-well as some old cat that wonders around. You couldn’t be that much of a cat lady right?
“I still don’t really know your name! I’m practically on a date with a complete stranger! Good gods for all I know you’re planning on taking me back to your place and locking me in a basement!” That’s actually sort of close… only he doesn’t have a basement. Should he invest in a basement?
“No one knows my real name princess. That’s kinda the point of why people call me PM.” Aegon attempts to diffuse the sudden tension with another fuck boy smile, but if anything it seems to make it worse…
“So you’re telling me no one in this entire town knows who you really are?”
“Nope.” It’s a simple answer, for a simple question. Yet it makes him think about it all. No one in this town does actually know who he is. The hair should’ve been a dead give away for who he was, yet no one questioned him about it. No one in any conversation he’d ever had in this town ever really asked him questions about him…
“What’s it begin with?” Your voice breaks him out of the tangent, yet when he turns his to look at you he’s forced to look straight into your eyes. Your very pretty, very close to him eyes.
“What?”
“Your name. Your real name. Not some made up alias you came up with but your actual, parent given or whatever adult given name. Tell me what it begins with if your not comfortable to say it fully.”
Aegon sighs in defeat when he sees your determined eyes. Again, your very close to him eyes that make his own want to drift to your lips and see if they taste of the vanilla ice cream. “My father picked my name, mainly cause he was a traditional cunt. It begins with an A.”
“Anthony?”
“Like that Bridgerton dude?”
“You watch Bridgerton?”
“No I remember when I was on the beach and a bunch of girls in skimpy bikinis were talking about the dude. Sounds like a dick for ditching his betrothed for her sister if you asked me.”
“Gonna just ignore that for the bigger issue… Arnold?”
“GET TO THE CHOPPER!”
“Dear gods give me strength… How about Archie?”
“Nope”
“Archibald?”
“Is that what I am to you princess? A fucking duke from the m 1800’s? I’m very harshly offended!”
“Achilles?”
“Are you trying to ask insinuate something princess?”
A frustrated sort of growl rips from your throat, and Aegon can’t help himself from thinking that’s the most hottest thing he’s ever heard. It almost naws at his head the idea that you growl like that in bed. When he takes you from behind, would you growl like that just for him while he’s cumming inside and paining your insides white? He certainly hopes so. He’s not very sorry for the fact he can feel himself getting hard in front of you. As why should he? He’ll be hopefully fucking you soon enough.
“You are so annoying!” You moan with your hands clenched in what he assumes is frustration. It makes him subconsciously smile from amusement.
“That’s the goal princess.” He winks for what feels like the tenth time today. That inner fuck boy really seems to be coming back full swing, though the worst part is he can’t tell if it’s a good or a bad thing. The good part is, he’s able to flirt with you like a bird flying. Scoring a couple deep blushes he’ll store the image of later. The bad part however, now that part of him is unlocked, the thoughts of that lifestyle are hitting him full force.
The images of you with that ice cream on your lips sending his mind racing. Sounds of you groaning playing again and again as if they’re on some old record player he can’t turn off. The taste of the ice cream is what he’s thinking your lips would taste like if he was to kiss you.
To be honest, the rest of the date not date went like a blur. As if he’d somehow snorted some sort of coke and was in some hallucinagenic high or something. Yeah, he remembers showing you the rest of the shitty buildings and telling you peoples secrets like you and him were on some shitty quiz show (unlike catchphrase if you ever dissed catchphrase he’d probably have to kill you). But honestly, it was as if he was watching it from above. The only way he can think of to describe it is from that marvel movie Dr Strange with the weird ghost thing they do.
The only way he’s brought back to his own body is when he felt the sudden warmth of your body on his. The feeling like his soul was entering his body hitting him harshly and quickly as he realised what was going on. You were hugging him. Your hands were wrapped around him and your head was in his neck.
Aegon can’t deny he didn’t enjoy the feeling of your warmth, but he also can’t deny the uncomfortable feeling of the hug itself. His arms though did not move, only limply and awkwardly stiff at his sides. His chin was brushing against the shell of your ear. Worst of all, he could feel his chest beating like he ran one of those marathon things, it’s almost worst that he doesn’t know if why his heart was beating so fast whether because it was from the sudden affection, or because while you hugged him he realised he could feel the imprint of your breasts.
You look up at him with your chest still in quite close proximity to his own, and your hands placed on his forearms. You seem to ponder something with a raised brow, as your mouth already begins to move.“You’re not a big hug kinda guy are you?”
“No I guess not.” He simply shrugs. His arms still hang limply, while your face is still close. He’s almost tempted to lean forward and close that gap. See if your lips will taste like the vanilla ice cream you were licking not long ago. He can’t deny though that he likes this act even better than going for the taste. A small torture for a large reward. Maybe it’s the masochist in him? Or the sadist that revels in the cat and mouse game your not even aware your playing. Call him insane, it’s not like he’s never heard it before anyway.
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hello-nichya-here · 2 months ago
Note
I have a question that might be offensive, and I'm sorry in advance for any hurt it may cause. I've been trying to search for an answer online for a while but I'm not able to find a proper one, and hoped you could help me.
From what I have gathered, autistic people do not wish for there to be a cure for autism, which I understand because well, it would change your brain and the way you view the world. Some even insist it cannot exist (which I'm not so sure about but whatever). My main question is, there are thousands of people out there who are affected by some kinds of ASD so severe that they can never lead a proper life, will never mentally develop beyond a child, and often have to live through agonizing pain and overstimulation. When it comes to these cases, would they not prefer a cure? So wouldn't it be more ethical for a cure to exist, but taking the cure not be compulsory? Those people are obviously not on social media, so their voices go unheard. But wouldn't they and their loved ones not want them to be in pain?
Thanks in advance.
First off, here's why a "cure" is indeed impossible: autism is a neurotype, not a disease. It's not the brain or any organ/system doing something it shouldn't or being damaged by some internal and/or external factor. An autistic brain functions DIFFERENTLY, not DEFECTIVELY, though obviously there is a variety of ways in which it manifests, and it is very rare for an autistic person to be ONLY autistic, there's often one, or more, conditions affecting them at the same time (anxiety, ADHD, schizophrenia, depression, OCD, etc). It is also likely a result of multiple cromossomes working in atypical ways (unlike with Down Syndrome, which is a result of cromossome 21 and ONLY 21 working differently) - and we still don't know which ones, or even how many said cromossomes are.
What does all of that mean for a cure? It means that:
1 - To make an autistic person non-autistic it'd need to be possible to discover it when they're still a fetus and somehow force their brain and entire nervous system to form differently - both things modern science can't do and that we're not sure will EVER be possible.
2 - It is very likely that even if a cure is possible, it will NOT be a one-size-fits-all kind of deal, and it will work on some cases and be useless in others.
So it is already a far, far, FAR more complicated deal than just "If we put enough money, time and effort into it, we can find a cure." Part of the reason why many autistic people are sick of nearly every fucking charity about autism being focused on a cure is because, instead of that money going directly to us or to our caretakers (be it family or any form of hospice/home) and having a very real positive effective, that money goes into searching for a something that might genuinely not be biologically possible.
This is sadly the common history for nearly every group under the large umbrella of Disabled People. Sign Language was discouraged and even made ILLEGAL in some countries long before there were was a reliable, safe way to allow deaf people to hear. There are THOUSANDS of horror stories about people with any form of paralysis or mobility issues being just let root and die in their beds, even after all kinds of mobility aids were invented because "it's a burden to the caretakers" and a "miserable life to live anyway." A disabled athlete in Canada has recently complained about lack of accessibility and was offered EUTHANASIA as a solution because God forbid someone has to build a ramp.
The sad reality is that many non-disabled people are only interested in helping us if the help is guaranteed to make us 100% "normal." If it will gives us a decent, and sometimes fully/mostly independent life, but not make us able-bodied/neurotypical it is NEVER considerd "good enough", and is often talked about as a "set-back for the cure." Giving us ways to communicate our needs, find emotional support, employment, or at the very least multiple sources of aid that will allow our families to not be on "caretaker mode" 24/7 and to not fear what might happen to us once they pass away is considered A SET BACK. Because we're not "cured", but are also not dead.
They're focused on trying to "solve the mystery that will totally lead us to the cure IN THE FUTURE", but never on hearing our VERY basic requests for stuff that would greately improve our lives NOW - Autism Speaks, the largest autism "charity" (hate-group that literally uses "therapy" created by nazis to "help" us) literally popularized the myths that we don't know ANYTHING about autism, how it happens or how to help people with it, and making the "official autism symbol" be a fucking puzzle piece.
The "finding a cure is more important than anything" narrative talks over the needs of EVERY autistic person in existence, including the ones that cannot express their opinion or understand their own condition enough to HAVE an opinon, and yes, including the ones that actively WANT to be "cured."
And speaking of people who do genuinely want to be "cured" of their autism: it is extremely naive of you to think there's any change a cure wouldn't be made mandatory if it existed, and that the choice would be left to the individual, or even to a parent/caretaker on the more "extreme" cases.
Like I said before, things like Sign Language were made ILLEGAL in many countries for the crime of helping disabled have a better life without curing them. We still have cases of doctors operating deaf babies/toddlers without the parents consent. Wheelchair users constantly complain that people just randomly decide to "help" them by pushing their chair towards where they assume the person wants to go, without saying a word to them, without letting them change direction and sometimes even being careless enough to fuck up the chair.
Disabled people CONSTANTLY get called stupid or selfish for not opting for long, expensive treatments that will often only TEMPORARELY make them abled-bodied because being "normal/not a burden" should be more important than anything, including the completely unnecessary and often brutal emotional turmoil of getting used to a "normal" life just go then have to get used to being disabled again. And yes, autistic peoplel, from the completely indepent ones to the ones that need constant care, who have said they would NEVER take a cure for it if one existed, ALREADY get condescending, and sometimes openly hateful, comments about it all day, every day, everywhere. For saying we don't want to take the IMAGINARY pill that can "fix" us.
Our lives are already considered lesser, our opinions are already disregarded, and our bodily autonomy is already denied constantly (see the more "harmless" things like people that think it's funny to force hugs and kisses on those of us who hate most physical contact, to doctors that have injured or KILLED us through unnecessary, often violent means of restraining us during meltdowns). If a cure existed, we'd be straight up forced, or at least constantly pressured, to take it. There's a reason WE are the only ones discussing how unethical it'd be to force us to be "cured", while most neurptypicals have not even heard of that objection, and half would get mad at us for being "ungrateful" - after all, they spent so much time, money and effort on this thing (that we've been rejecting from day one), we can't just refuse it like that!
I know you probably mean well, anon, but the sad reality is that nearly every talk of "curing" autism (and almost anything that is considered a disability) is often rooted on nothing but society's very open disgust and disdain towards our very existence, not a genuine desire to make sure we're safe and happy - and as you can imagine, we're mad that we constantly have to justify our right to be alive and actually listened to, not spoken over by people who are "trying to help" by telling us to shut up and be glad that they're trying to make us "normal."
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sehodreams · 11 months ago
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Sungchan x plus size!reader
Tw: I don't know, if you see anything please let me now in comments.
Tags: fluff, inexperienced reader, just kisses and him wanting to give you stuff and have you around, older reader (by 2 years).
When we met i was still a student, i had decided to take that subject on my last year instead of the second and never, ever, had i thought that decision would take me here now.
He was 21 and I was 23, did it bother me? A bit to be honest, would things be different if we were the same age? Doubt it.
Now I was 26, with my first big corporate job, and he was still a student.
I have no idea how did all start, well no, I know exactly how did it start, but I mean, I don't know how we connected, we had no way of having a real conversation, all happened so fast.
I was reading a book in the library, it was just a novel I saw lying around in my room that I had no memory of buying, I took it to distract myself from all the stress of trying to find a decent internship. I was reading it in complety silence when he came to me.
"Sorry, is this seat taken?" He asked me with his big and bright eyes.
I looked up to him, a fucking tower looking at me with his bambi eyes. I said no with a shake of head and then continue reading. He sat in front of me and opened the book we were currently studying in class. We were on our own thing for a good time before he decided to talk again. He coughed to catch my attention.
"Sorry, it's just... I was wondering if you could help me with this..." he showed me his notes, I read them and then explain what I had understood from class, then I pulled out my notes and showed them to him. "You can copy this part if you want, to remember it"
He smiled and nodded, he finished and gave me my notebook back. "Thank you, I've been having problems with this subject" he said a bit shyly, he was talking to me in a really respectful way, sure he knew I was older, but that seemed cute to me.
"No problem, you can ask if you need help, is nothing to be embarrassed for, something I learned after so much time is that asking doesn't cost anything, and even if you feel like a fool, people won't really care" when I finished talking I felt like an old man giving advice and wished i hadn't said so much on my insides. He smiled and laughed softly, his shoulders where tense and he couldn't maintain eye contact with me. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable so I continued with my book.
"If you don't mind, maybe could I buy you a coffee for your help?" He offered after a few minutes in silence.
I looked at him and laughed softly "it's okay, you don't have to"
He looked at me a bit embarrassed because i didn't accept his offer and I felt bad for him.
"Uhmm, but I wouldn't mind a coke from the machine" I said after a few seconds.
His face was bright again and nodded. I grabbed my stuff and walked with him to the machines out of the library.
He bought me can of coke and while I was waiting I bought some chips.
"Oh, I should've bought that for you" he said, giving me my drink.
I looked at him "Oh honey, if you continue to buy stuff for people just for little favors you'll end up broke" I laughed. He denied with a smile. "See you later, I have class on the other side of the campus" I smiled "thank you for the coke"
I went to my class and didn't think much of the interaction. Actually, I had already forgotten when we met again. I was on my seat waiting for my friend when he arrived and sat on my other side.
"Good morning" he said softly to not bother me. "Oh, hey" I said back, not knowing what else to say. I was scrolling on my phone to kill time, watching my old classmates do better than me in everything, they had jobs, lovers, traveled around the world, and I was just there, still going to school and without a job.
"Sunbae?" I was in trance and looked back to him.
"Oh sorry, didn't hear you, could you repeat what you said?" I asked.
"Oh, I was just asking if you were going to the gathering they'll have today, I know it's mostly first and second years, but your friend said she was going so I was wondering if you would too." He was blabbering at this point and I didn't know how to stop him.
"Oh, not really, they told me but I don't think you guys will be comfortable with an old geezer" I laughed dryly.
"Don't say that, you're not an old geezer" he was quickly to answer.
I got surprised at his tone and laughed.
"I'll think about it" I concluded and continued watching my phone.
Class ended like usual and I went to the cafeteria with my friend.
"Please come today, there are too many boys this year and one more girl would be great, we need to check they're not making the girls feel uncomfortable" she begged. I wanted to say no because I had better things than go and get drunk with a bunch of kids, but the last part got me and I remembered my seniors also going to those gatherings to check on us. I was weak to old memories. "Yeah you're right, but that means I won't drink too much, and you also shouldn't" she smiled and nodded eagerly.
We went to a cabin near the campus, usually used to first year welcomes. Everyone was already there when we arrived, tons of alcohol of all kind and a bunch of boys. It was clear the difference between men and women and I was glad I was there to put a stop in case anything went out of control. I was a girl too, but being older gave me a voice they couldn't ignore.
A group of girls came to me relieved and sat around me to drink comfortably. We were playing all those silly games and they let me drink less with the excuse of taking my fake medication.
It was 3 am when most of them seemed to pass out. Me and Sungchan moved the boys and girls to different rooms so they could sleep well. I decided to not sleep and be alert, I was sitting in what would be considered the living room in a sofa, looking at my phone. He came and sat beside me with a couple of ice creams after some time.
"Would you like an ice cream?" He asked me with a smile. I grabbed the one he was offering me.
"Thanks, can't sleep?" I was eating it comfortable, it was summer and it was perfect to refresh me.
"Yes, it's too hot in the shared room" he laughed, he looked pretty alive to me even after drinking all night. "And you? Why aren't you with the others?" He asked curiously.
"Just checking the boys stay in their room, want to make sure the girls are safe" I said still eating my ice cream, not thinking much of it.
"Sunbaenim, you're still a girl, even if you're older, you're protecting them, but who is protecting you?" He looked angry and then in shock for talking to me so boldly. "I'm sorry, it's just... you need to think about you too"
I was lost of words at his tone.
"It's okay, no one looks at me that way" to be honest I had never been approached in a romantic way by anyone, and I wasn't ugly, I felt pretty, I had my own comfortable style, I liked to wear cute accessories and I loved wearing my light makeup that enhanced my features. I liked how I looked, I was bigger but I found my own sense of style and felt good on my clothes, it took me time after dealing with self-steem problems in high-school, but when I ditched the uniform and tried clothes I really liked, I found myself smiling at my reflection. I liked my big chest and my flat butt, I liked my soft tummy and my chubby legs, I just liked me, and at first it was hard not being seen by anyone as a love interest, but everyone had their own type and I couldn't judge others for not liking me, so after a long time I just sighed and concentrated on me being happy with my own company.
"Why do you say that?" He was serious.
"Uhmm, men just don't like me, I don't know why, I guess that's why I'm not afraid, but I've seen guys be intense with my friends so I like to make sure the other girls are okay, one never knows"
He was looking at me with an indescribable face, a combination of seriousness, anger and disappointment.
A tension came in the silence and he was looking at the bunch of empty beer cans on one side and I was looking at my ice cream package as if it was the most interesting thing I had ever seen, reading the ingredients like it was my job.
We were sitting shoulder to shoulder. At first there was a certain distance between us but after he accommodated himself on the little couch we were touching each other.
"What do you think about me? Don't you feel uncomfortable with me here? I'm a man too" he said after a long time, we both had finished our ice creams and I was reading a book in my phone. I looked over at him.
"Why are you asking that?" I said confused.
He looked at me directly in the eyes, then his eyes went down to my mouth and back to my eyes.
He didn't ask for permission, the shy and modest boy I met kissed me, softly at first, nervous, but then he grabbed me by the neck and made sure I wouldn't get away from his lips. It felt good, I couldn't deny it, it felt fucking good.
I was still relaxed from the couple of beers I had, but I was conscious of everything and couldn't deny the kiss.
"You have no idea of all the things I want to do to you" he said after a couple minutes kissing. I was stiff, not knowing what to say. It wasn't my first kiss, but it felt completely different. My body was suddenly incredibly hot and I just wanted to continue with our make-out session. I looked at him in the eyes, I have no idea what did my face look like at that moment, but he kissed me again with force, with more passion, his mouth tasted like strawberry ice cream and while one of his hands was on my neck the other was on my waist, pulling me closer to him.
That was our first kiss, when everyone else was sleeping in the rooms next to us. After that we continued kissing and making out in secret, sometimes in my apartment, sometimes in his, but we were almost never out there as a couple the first month. No one saw it coming when we were revealed. He was exhausted of us being a secret and left little clues around. Giving me snacks in class, waiting for me out of my classroom, following me around like a little puppy, a big and smiley puppy.
Now? Now we were living together in a slightly bigger apartment, kissing every day, with him still following me around like a puppy.
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weixuldo · 2 years ago
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Unconditionally Ch 21 (pt 2)
Anakin X Reader
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(I really cannot explain how much this story has meant to me, It may be a silly little AU about a space dad with lots of baggage, but its really been an outlet for me this semester. Whenever I get time (which has been coming less and less) I love to sit down and envelop myself in this world I created. I want to thank you all once more for sticking with me and for your support :) more notes will be at the end and I hope you enjoy!)
NSFW
It’s official. You are now a Skywalker :)
Warnings: smut, blowjobs, fingering, alcohol, cursing, sex, depiction of injury? did i mention sex?
___________________________________
The audience cheered as you kissed your new husband; waves of endorphins coursed through your system. This was truly the best day of your life. 
You turned to face the crowd with a smile happily on your face; you were still holding one of Anakin’s stiff hands as he started to walk. Surprised, you turned to look at him. The two of you planned only for him to do the vows standing. You didn’t think he would be able to walk at the wedding. His face was focused but he still gave you an assuring smile. 
Shakily, he made his way down the aisle with you supporting him from your side. The procession went slowly due to his noticeable limp, but you were just so shocked he was even doing it. You thought that he wasn’t making much progress in physio, especially after the surgery. 
With a wide smile you turned to face him and asked, “Ani, how?”
He huffed out a laugh as he continued forward, “surprise..” 
“Are you, ok? Does it hurt at all?”
He shut his eyes and shook his head, “No, it's ok. Just takes a bit of effort, but you're worth every ounce. I wanted to walk you down the aisle Y/N”
You squeezed his upper arm with a smile and continued towards the end of the path. With each step you were more and more proud of how well he was doing.
_____________________________________
The two of you planned, after the ceremony, you would get some time together to reflect before going to the reception.
You entered the private room with Anakin trailing behind you; their room was a decent size and decorated beautifully. The windows were frosted for privacy and there was a plush sofa in the middle of the room. Anakin placed a stiff hand on the small of your back, a feeling you rather enjoyed.
“This is nice, I’m glad we arranged to have some time together,” he said, walking towards the couch. His gait was a little less noticeable than when he started down the aisle (he probably just needed some time to adjust); though, it obviously wasn’t perfectly natural. 
“I wish you would have told me..’ you began as you gathered your gown to join him on the couch. 
“I wanted to surprise you…are you upset?” his eyes became unsure as he gazed upon your glowing face. 
“Of course not Ani, I’m so incredibly proud of you! I just wish I had known so I could have celebrated this milestone with you”
His expression relaxed and a soft smile graced his beautiful face; smile lines wrinkling at the ends of his blue eyes. He didn’t speak, instead, he gently pulled you closer to him; sometimes you didn’t need words to communicate with Anakin. That was something you loved about the two of you. 
As you laid on his chest listening to his breathing– which was never fully restored to its full capabilities after the accident– your mind began to replay your relationship with him.
The anxiety you felt when you first came upon his huge house, walking up the marble steps, and meeting him for the first time. He was so intimidating, arrogant, and rude… but oh, was he handsome… You knew he still held some insecurities about his looks and disabilities– he worried that you missed or liked his body (and him) better when he was more physically capable. That notion couldn’t be further from the truth. You adored him for who he was and adored every part of him- no matter the body he inhibited.
You thought back to how bad he was at communicating feelings to you at the beginning and just how out of practice he was. If you were being honest, he was a huge dick. But now knowing how you ended up, you were glad you stuck around.
You remembered the slack-jawed look he gave you that time he called you in unexpectedly and you came in that little green dress. He was in awe. A small laugh escaped your lips as you nuzzled further into your lover. 
“What’s gotten you so giddy, hmm?”
“Oh, nothing. Just reminiscing on your wonderful attitude when we first started out”
A harsh blush crept its way onto his cheeks, “oh…”
“You know, I actually debating quitting because I thought you hated me that much”
He huffed and for a moment you thought he was upset. 
“Quite the contrary, Y/N”
Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as he guided you to sit on his lap and face him. Under the layers of the dress you felt the fabric of his dress pants against your thighs. His eyes were intense and glistening with a familiar gleam…one you craved.
“Ani..”
“If they didn’t know any better, they’d probably think we’re fucking” his low register sent shivers down your spine.
You gave him an enchanting stare, “well…that could be arranged” you whispered as you leaned in to nip at his ear.
Arousal pooled in your stomach as you listened to his breath hitch and the beautiful sounds he emitted as you grazed over the ever growing bulge right beneath you. You shivered as his stiff appendages traveled up your sides; one of his mechanical hands rested itself on the back of your neck, deepening the kiss. 
He slid his tongue into your mouth and gently bit your lip as you pulled away. You slowly moved your hips back and forth on his clothed thigh, the slickness in your underwear became all the more apparent. 
“Oh Anakin” you gasped as he brought his better functioning hand towards your front and squeezed one of your breasts as best as he could. Over time you had grown accustomed to his robotic touch, you liked the way the strong appendages slowly gripped around you.
The outline of his cock was extremely close to your clothed pussy. Just to be a tease, you grinded on him; the noise that escaped his throat was exhillerating.
“I’m all yours now Anakin. All yours…” You cooed, slowly palming him over his pants.
Something in him changed when you referred to yourself as “his” because his abs tensed and his hips bucked up. 
“Mmhph! Ahh ahh” he stifled his moans as you quickened your pace, even opting to dive into his pants, below the waistband of his boxers. 
His head flung back as you grazed over his tip, already wet with pre-cum. You didn’t even have to see it to know that it was definitely a blushing red and that the vein on the bottom side was bulging. As you ran your hands up and down his shaft, you could feel it throbbing and pulsing. For you.
He pressed a stiff hand on your shoulder to pull your attention to his face, “Y/N, If you continue doing t-that… I’m gonna..” He took a moment to take in a deep breath, “And I don’t wanna stain m-my..”
You slid yourself off of his lap and he shivered at the cool air against his warm member. Deviously, you lowered yourself onto your knees and leaned into his thighs, a polished hand on both of his legs. 
“Good thing we have an extra suit for the reception” you smiled.
Before he could register and agree, you had sucked him down so far that all he could do was moan. His upper thighs tensed with every bob of your head. 
Ambitiously, you took all of him in your mouth, your nose met his naval; one of your hands gripped his side and one, the upper part of his thigh where his prosthetic stopped. So many beautiful noises escaped his mouth, you were amused by his feeble attempts of stifling them. 
You came back up with a long drag of your tongue against his shaft. You met his face and smiled as he panted with the neediest look you had ever seen. 
“Y-y/n…” he stuttered out.
“Yes, my love?” you deviously inquired.
“Y-you’re crazy”
Instead of answering him, you ran your hands through his hair and pulled him into a passionate kiss. 
“Hey-” a sudden knock on the door startled both of you.
“Just wanted to let you know, the reception is starting in 45 minutes” the voice, which you recognized as Ahsoka, informed.
You slid a quick hand down to finish Anakin off. He jolted and tried to stop the guttural moan from leaving his mouth.
“Ok! We’ll be there soon!”
With one flick of your wrist, Anakin was cumming all over himself and your hand. His eyes rolled back and he tossed his head back, so you placed a gentle yet firm hand over his mouth. 
“Thank you Ahsoka”
“No worries Sky gal! Can't wait to see your reception dress!”
Oh shit…
You forgot you had to change…
Your dress was pretty intricate; you would need help undressing and unbinding the laces but you didn’t know if Anakin would be able to help you.
When the coast was clear, you shifted off of his lap. He was gasping and you quickly fetched his inhaler. He took a few puffs and released a long exhale before turning to you.
“What the… fuck has gotten.. In to you?” he panted with a mesmerized look on his face.
You shrugged with a smirk and he joined with a laugh. 
“We should probably get ready for the reception- I didn’t even realize how long we were in here.” You said, beginning to take off your dress until you would need Anakin’s help. 
He glanced at the clock on the wall, “oh shit- yea we should” he exclaimed as he began to haul himself off the couch. 
Before you could even ask, Anakin was already attempting to pull at the ribbons that laced up your dress, much to your surprise he was able to undo the ribbons fairly easily. You thanked him with a sweet peck on the lips before you began to help him out of his, now, cum stained suit. 
Quickly, you helped him into the reception suit- he rested his mechanical forearms on your shoulders as you pulled his pants over his artificial legs. Soon you slipped on the shorter, more party-style dress and fixed up your makeup. 
________________________________________
The reception hall was dimly lit, the warm glow of the candlelit centerpieces scattered around the venue; you made sure it was wheelchair accessible, with ramps and accommodations for Anakin's mobility. Many people mingled and shared small conversations. Anakin definitely spared no expense while planning the wedding; five star catering, an exclusive venue, quality decor, and live orchestral music, plus a band and DJ for later on in the night (more-so for you and your friends, you were quite a bit younger than him after all). 
“The reception is supposed to start in less than three minutes, do they want to miss their own celebration?” Ben said, looking at his watch, before taking a sip of the champagne in his hand. 
“Yea, well I have a feeling they were celebrating in a different way” Ahsoka quipped as she gulped down her drink.
“Oh. How…them” Ben chuckled.
Soon the doors of the venue hall were opened and you walked in with Anakin by your side, a large smile plastered on your face. You were so overjoyed that you were married and excited by all of your guests, that you didn’t even notice all Anakin was looking at was you.
How he admired you…. His beautiful Y/N. 
The crowd cheered as you led Anakin to the center of the ballroom, seamlessly the ambient music changed into an orchestral version of the song the two of you chose. He placed a gentle hand on your waist and the other grabbed your hand as he started to sway with you; his blue eyes still so vibrant even in the dim lighting.
“Are you sure you can-” you whispered.
He nodded and calmed your worries, “Don’t worry my love, I’ve been practicing”.
You smiled and stepped closer to him as the music swelled. His dancing may not have been the most agile, but the familiar movements warmed your heart. All you cared about in this moment was that you were his and he was yours. 
Before you knew it the crowd was clapping and Anakin tilted your chin up with his hand to draw you in for a passionate kiss.
_______________________________________
The dinner and speeches went well; many friends and family members spoke, though the sweetest one was Luke and Leia’s. They explained how excited they were that you were marrying their father and how long they had wanted to call you “mom”; honestly, they had you tearing up.
The night went on, lots of congratulations and more celebration. You walked off of the dance floor to look for your husband. Across the room you spotted him at the bar talking to some old friends; he was seated in his wheelchair once again and his suit coat had been discarded, leaving him just in his white button down.
You waited a moment before the band of guys saw you looking over; once you had been spotted, there was no stopping the group of buzzed men from calling you to come and join.
“Hey Hey, Y/N! It’s nice to finally meet ‘cha” A very drunk man exclaimed, extending a hand for a very firm handshake. 
“Hello!” you smiled, slightly confused. 
Anakin picked up on your confusion and butted in, “Are you going to introduce yourself or just be some random guy shaking her hand?” he said in a joking tone.
“OhhHH! I’m Rex! How ya doin’ miss?” he said, making a motion like he was tilting a cowboy hat, to which you laughed. 
“Hi Rex” you giggled.
“You’ve gotta be a pretty special little lady to make this hard-ass soften up haha” Rex laughed, patting Anakin on the back.
Normally if anyone else dared touch him, he would have flipped out and gotten very agitated, but you could tell he was comfortable with this guy. Soon, Ahsoka stumbled up to you and gave you a very uncoordinated hug. 
“y/nnnn! T-this is my favoriteee right h-hereee” she smiled hanging off of you.
“Haha, Hello to you too Ahsoka” you smiled, supporting her weight with your shoulder.
She blinked hard and once she opened her eyes again. It looked as if she were completely sober, “Anakin. I know I’ve known yo longer, but if you EVER fuck around with y/n. You will be facing me. She’s a good one, don’t mess it up.” 
And just like that, she was right back to slurring her words; thankfully Ben stepped in and took her to sit in the less crowded part of the room, “Come-come Ahsoka, why don’t we sit you down? Maybe we should be done drinking for the night, hmm?”
You turned to face the group once more, but found only Anakin remained. 
“Hey” he spoke sweetly as he gently took one of your hands into his.
“Hi” you smiled back at him.
_______________________________________
The party raged on into the early hours of the morning, older business associates of Ben and Anakin stumbled around just like your college age friends. Seems everyone had a good time. Anakin actually had not drunk much at all and you were pretty sober too. As the last few people trickled out and said their goodbyes, you walked over to where Anakin had seated himself; your heels discarded long ago. 
“I think that was the last couple” you said, leaning down to kiss him.
“Now I can finally enjoy my wife in peace,” he teased with a grin.
“Well, I’m not quite tired enough to go to sleep and, I mean, we do need to consummate this…” you said, looking away and twirling your hair.
He exhaled and shook his head, “I love you so much Y/N”.
You smiled and gave him a wink as you went to fetch Ben and the kids to tell them the party was over. Earlier on in the night you laid the twins down to sleep in a secluded room further back in the hall, so that they wouldn’t be grumpy in the morning. After taking care of Ahsoka, Ben retired to that room to sleep as well, (Ahsoka being drunk was like taking care of the twins times 5). It worked out well though, The kids were going to spend the night with their uncle Ben or Auntie Ash.
After getting everything straightened out, you and Anakin finally headed back to the house. The drive back was the longest ride you had ever taken, the tension in the back was so thick, the desire burning in your chest. You needed him.
Instead of spending extra, the two of you decided to forgo the “honeymoon suite” and just “do it” at the house; not only was it cheaper, but it had all of Anakin’s supplies already available.
Once the two of you closed the door to the mansion, you were on his lap. Your legs handing over his arm rests and your hands in his sandy hair. The pristine walls echoed with your desire, every breath, every sigh, every moan… you could hear it all.
You loved the feeling of his stiff hands as they caressed your sides and his tongue down your throat. He still had his prosthetics on and you could feel the solid joint of his titanium knee pressing into your ass. 
As you kissed him, the fact that his white button down was still on, became a nuisance to you; quickly, with swift and calculated motions, you undid each button and revealed his bare chest to you. He was absolutely magnificent, his core never really diminished even when he was bed-ridden in the beginning, it always remained a pretty prominent structure of his. Your eyes traced down his skin, mapping every dent and beauty mark on his spacious chest. God he was beautiful.
“Like what you see?” he breathed out, slightly wiping his bottom lip. 
All you could do was nod.
“Let me see you” he asked in a gentle, yet demanding tone…and of course you complied. 
You turned away from his chair and began to take off the thin silky dress you were wearing: skin collecting goosebumps from the cool air hitting your skin. Left in your lacy bra and panties, you turned back to see Anakin not in his chair, rather, he was standing at his full height; a forearm resting on the doorframe to the next room. 
His piercing blue eyes wandered up and down your body hungrily as his breath became deeper. 
“You’re perfect Y/N” 
You blushed and walked towards your lover. 
“You’re not too bad yourself” you smirked, pulling him down for a kiss; your mouth filled with the fresh taste of the mint gum he had been chewing earlier in the night. 
You shuddered as one of his cool hands was placed at the small of your back. He deepened the kiss, using more tongue than the last time, before pulling away with a moan.
“We should take this to the room,” he said, pulling at the strap of your panties. 
You could feel your arousal pooling and sliding against your folds as he tugged at your bottoms.
“Please Ani” you whimpered as you palmed his cock through his pants, causing his eyes to roll back as he exhaled a beautiful moan. 
Soon the two of you busted through the doors to your room; you had unzipped Anakin’s trousers and his prominent bulge was on full display through his black boxers; beads of pre-cum dampening a small circle in the front. Once you reached the bed, he lightly pushed you down onto your back as he positioned himself in between your legs. 
“Ani?” you panted, curious as to what he was doing. 
Before you knew it, he had lowered himself so that his face was right at your entrance. He gently slid your lacy panties off with his teeth and returned to kiss your clit. You shivered at the sudden contact of his warm mouth; he placed his mechanical hands on both of your thighs and squeezed, causing you to throw your head back. 
He began slowly, short licks and little kisses, but as your noises became more desperate he sped up. His skilled tongue was lapping at you as if you were the last thing he would ever eat. 
“T-that f-feelss..” You could barely string your words together and your legs were quivering.
He ceased his work only to meet your eyes, “You taste so good, Y/N” he panted in a deep voice.
Quickly he went back to work, swirling his tongue around your sweet bud. You gasped as you felt something entering you, one of his mechanical fingers; fuckkk, the way it rhythmically curled felt euphoric.
“Oh my God Anakin!” you moaned as you felt his digits swirling inside of you as he marked your stomach with his teeth.
“I-I’m gonna.. I” you stammered as you felt the tight knot in your lower stomach burst and you saw a galaxy of stars. The sound that escaped you could only be explained as ethereal. 
As you let the feeling wash over you, he stood himself up and sat on the edge of bed, panting. You heard his labored breathing and worried he overexerted himself.
“Ani? Are you-” you began as you sat up to attend to him, though, before you could finish you looked down to see that you weren't the only one who came from that ordeal. His stomach flexed as the last few waves of his orgasm shot through him and you blushed.
You wrapped your arms around him and the two of you sat there for a moment before he stood to take his underwear off. As he stood before you, you took a moment to take in his beauty, every scar, every scrape, every part of him told the story of the man you loved.
He fumbled with the waistband, so you swooped in to peel away his cum-stained boxers; he whimpered when they brushed over his semi-hard member. You stood and met his gaze, the two of you exchanging a knowing look. Soon you were back on the bed with your legs wrapped around his waist as he thrusted himself in and out of you. 
The sounds of your combined moans ricochet off of the walls and the headboard of the bed thumped against the wall. This was the first time he had fucked you with his prosthetics on, a part of you worried about them rubbing too roughly against his stumps, but he assured you he was ok. This was also the first time since before the accident (so over half a year) that he had been on top; you forgot how good he was with his hips. 
He fucked you with such vigor and passion that it had tears brimming at the corners of your eyes. He had taken off his left arm so he could feel you with his own, a sensation that made the experience all the better for him. As he used his mechanical knees as leverage, he buried himself so deep inside of you causing his eyes to roll back.
He laid his head in the crook of your neck and nipped at your ear, “I-I don’t…think..I-I” he cut himself off with a sharp breath as his tip kissed your cervix. 
“L-last much l..ong-ger” he stuttered as his hips bucked wildly. 
His warm body felt so good on top of you and his dick was definitely hitting all the right spots and as much as you wanted more, you were close too. So in one calculated motion, you pulled him towards you by the back of his neck and begged “I want you to cum for me”. 
And he did. 
With one last thrust from his hips his warm cum filled you up. The feeling was indescribable, you felt as if you had been transported to another world. Truly, that was the best sex you had ever shared with him; perhaps it is because it was your first as husband and wife, but damn, was that amazing. 
You knew he was getting overstimulated by the way his jaw clenched and his brows knitted together. So you helped him gently ease himself out of you and laid him on his back. His chest rose and fell rapidly so you fetched his inhaler and administered it to him. Once his breathing evened he opened his blue eyes and looked at you. 
“My beautiful wife, My Y/N” he said with a raspy voice as he brushed the side of your flushed cheek. 
In return, you smiled at him and began to take off his prosthetics. Once you cleaned up and got everything situated you joined him in bed. It was now around 4 am, so you decided the shower could wait until “later in the morning”. 
As you nestled up beside Anakin in your large bed, he turned to give you a sweet kiss on your forehead. You returned the gesture by tilting to kiss him on the lips with a smile. 
The sounds of your breathing and the fan were the only noises in the room as the two of you began to drift to sleep. You ran your hand down his chest until you felt his necklace you had gotten for Christmas. You ran your thumb over the dates on the back.
“1..2..” you counted in your head as you logged the dates you had engraved, but what surprised you was a third. Quickly you sat up which made Anakin ask what was wrong.
“Can I turn on the light real quick?” you asked, already reaching for the lamp.
“Yea, what's wrong darling?” he said, blinking open his tired eyes.
You reached for his necklace once more and saw the third date shimmering on his gold pendant, your birthday. Once you met his eyes again, he had a contemptuous smile on his face.
“You’ll always be in my heart” was all he said before you clicked off the light again and engulfed him in a loving embrace. 
You never expected him to etch your date into the gift you got him all that time ago… but he did. 
As the two of you drifted off to sleep your heart was filled with nothing but love and joy. 
Anakin was it, the last man you would be with.
The only man you would love,
Unconditionally. 
***
a/n: Woooooww! I just want to say, thank you all so much for following my story, I never in a million years would have ever thought my writing would even be read at all haha. I truly do love this story and hope to write ones of its caliber and better in the future. I’ll make a post about the status of the other fics and upcoming ones hehe. Also I am planning to do an epilogue for this story in the future, if anyone would be interested :)
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pinkskytwst · 2 years ago
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MAKING A STAND: Part III
Yandere!First Years/Prefect Romantic Poly, Grim/Prefect Platonic
Alright, everyone, I hope you all like this and that it's decent enough for the end of this little trilogy. Tell me what you think! XD I had fun imagining some of their older looks.
==================
“Deuce, wait a moment.” The prefect giggled, tugging on their lover’s sleeve until the Heartslabyul Vice-Housewarden stopped from his frantic search of his Astrology textbook.
They maneuvered him better so they could reach his hair. The long, midnight blue locks had started to fall from the haphazard ponytail he had tugged it into.
“Really, why do you keep it so long when you barely do anything with it?” they teased playfully as they ran their fingers through the silky locks that nearly reached the middle of the other’s back now and began pulling it up into a neater tail to keep it out of the way.
Deuce couldn’t help but smile back just as playfully as he reveled in the feeling.
“I like when you run your fingers through it.” He admitted, managing not to blush this time.
He had gotten a little better at that over the three years at NRC, though his eyes still sparkled just as bright when the Prefect laughed in returned and gave him a light kiss on the corner of his mouth.
“Well, you’re going to have to learn how to keep it tidy without me during your internship.” They warned fondly. “I doubt the Queendom’s guardsmen will allow me to just show up every morning to do it for you.”
Deuce pouted at little at that, looping his arms around their waist to pull them closer and rest his forehead against theirs.
“I wish you could come with me.” He admitted.
“Oi what about me!?” Ace’s voice interrupted as he entered the Ramshackle kitchen.
Deuce rolled is eyes. “Internship will be a vacation away from you.” He shot back to his Housewarden. “I might actually get some real sleep.”
The red head’s grin shifted to a devious smirk as draped himself over his shoulders.
“Oh? I thought you rather liked me keeping you awake.” He teased, causing the Prefect to giggle into Deuce’s chest when the blue haired young man instantly flustered and tried to elbow their lover.
“YOU SNORE!” he insisted, glaring when the red head just danced away with a laugh and sauntered over to the breakfast table where the food was already set out.
He dropped down into one of the chairs and began filling a plate for himself, making sure to put some on the plate beside him so that the Prefect wouldn’t get distracted and skip eating.
“So where are the others?” he asked, looking over his shoulder at the still blushing top ranked student and the giggling Prefect that was trying to soothe him and usher him into a chair to eat as well.
“They are on their way.” The Prefect smiled brightly, bustling around to get some drinks for everyone. “Epel is getting ready for morning practice and Howl should be back soon from his rounds.” They explained. “Sebek had to return to Diasomnia to check on things and Tsunotarou said he would be mirror calling to see how he was doing. It was a while ago, though, since he had to leave before even Jack because of the time difference. He should-“
“MY LOVES I HAVE RETURNED! I HAVE NEWS FROM WAKA-SAMA THAT I KNOW YOU WILL ALL BE EXCITED TO HEAR!” came the bellow from the entrance as the door to Ramshackle was thrown open.
“-be arriving soon.” They chuckled.
Ace snorted and Deuce couldn’t help but smile fondly as their tallest lover came bounding into the kitchen with all the energy of an eager puppy despite his size.
“Welcome back, Sebek.” The prefect greeted him with a smile, leaning up on their toes to place a kiss on his cheek that he eagerly returned with one of his own.
It was swiftly followed by him bending down to press one against Ace’s temple and then meeting Deuce for a quick one on the lips.
“WHERE ARE EPEL AND JACK!?” he asked. “I HAVE IMPORTANT INFORMATION FROM WAKA-SAMA TO IMPART!”
“What, did he tell you about a new cloak he bought?” Ace teased.
“NAY! WELL, YES, BUT THAT IS NOT WHAT IS IMPORTANT IN THIS INSTANCE! OF COURSE, ALL OF WAKA-SAMA’S NEWS IS IMPORTANT BUT THIS IS DOUBLY SO!”
“Oi! Lizard, you can stop yelling.” Grim yawned as he was draped over Epel’s shoulder as the Pomefiore Housewarden was making his way down the stairs.
“I AM NOT A LIZARD!”
The Prefect covered their giggles and moved to pick up their partner from his perch. It was impossible to continue to hide them, however, when Epel slipped his arm around their waist and tugged them into a hungry kiss. He always got a little more excited when he was going to have a chance to play Magift, even if it was only practice.
“FUNGYA! Stop doing that when they’re holding me! Gross!” Grim complained, pushing against Epel’s jersey.
“Then walk on your own.” Epel said pointedly, sticking out his tongue and causing the violet stud there to glint a little.
It matched the others that he had, his left ear almost completely taken up now by elegant rings and studs that his lovers had given him at different occasions during their time together.
“A boss never walks when they have a henchman to carry them!” Grim shot back.
Epel snorted and stole another kiss from the Prefect before doing the same to the others.
“How do you think the team’s shaping up?” Ace asked from a muffled, full mouth.
Epel dropped down on his other side and began filling his own plate.
“Pretty good. The dorm teams are all looking decent and the school team is much better than last year. Asim I & II are much better on a broom than most of the other first years. I think they’ll train up into a couple of good chargers.”
“Have they still not told you which of them is which?” Ace chuckled, the twins that had been put in Savanaclaw were pretty hilarious in his opinion.
“Oh they have, but they keep switching on me, I’m pretty sure.” Epel shrugged as he added a few more of the odd sausages from Briar Valley that Sebek always brought back from home onto his plate. “So I just call them one and two and whoever answers is that one for the day.
Sebek frowned. “THAT IS NOT A PROPER WAY TO GO ABOUT BEING A MEMBER OF A TEAM! ONE MUST BE HONEST WITH THEIR LEADER!”
“Not everyone can tell their Commander with a straight face that they request a reschedule because you plan on fucking your boyfriend silly for his birthday.” Epel drawled, his accent warming his words.
The half-fae stammered, flushing darkly. “IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR THEM TO KNOW I WAS NOT SIMPLY SHIRKING MY DUTIES! LILIA-SAMA EVEN GAVE HIS BEST WISHES FOR MY ENDEAVOR!”
Ace was cackling into his eggs at the memory of that conversation while Deuce flushed to his roots – having been the aforementioned boyfriend they was going to ‘fuck silly’.
“I will never be able to face Vanrouge-senpai again.” He lamented, running a hand down his face.
“THERE IS NO REASON TO BE EMBARRASSED! THE NIGHT WAS A SUCCESS AND VERY ENJOYABLE! YOU SAID SO YOURSELF THAT WE PROVIDED A PLEASUREABLE CELEBRATION!”
Deuce hid his face as Ace continued cackling to the point that he almost choked.
Grim scrunched his nose and filled his plate with a bit of help from the Prefect until it was a mountain of food.
“You are the worst roommates.” He complained. “I had to go to Heartslabyul just to get away from all your screaming.”
“WE ARE NOT THAT LOUD!”
The monster just gave the half-fae a look and didn’t bother answering.
The Prefect patted Deuce’s back comfortingly and offered Sebek a fond but rather embarrassed smile of their own.
“Why don’t you start eating until Jack returns and then you can tell us of your important news?” they suggested trying to change the subject to less blush-inducing topics.
“VERY GOOD SUGGESTION MY LOVE!” he declared, moving to take one of the free chairs and started gathering his own food.
The Prefect smiled warmly and passed the half-fae a large glass of juice before sliding some milk to Epel.
“Aa, we might need to trim a little and freshen the design a bit before the next match.” They said absently, lightly running their fingers over the short undercut that the lavender haired boy had started sporting. “Would you like to keep the apple blossom motif or go with something different?”
Epel tilted his head into the touch slightly, thinking for a moment. “I think I’ll keep it a little longer. Grandpa really liked it when he watched my match on the television.”
“What did granny think about the tattoo?” Ace teased, nodding to the colorful and rather beautiful work of art that covered Epel’s shoulder and wound down his arm in the form of watercolor apple blossoms with the branches resembling brushstrokes.
“She’s getting used to it.” Epel admitted sheepishly. “She doesn’t really mind them, she just wishes I only got them where I could hide them if I need to.”
The Prefect chuckled, kissing him on the temple again.
“I think it’s very dashing.” They said.
“Hey! I could get another!” Ace protested at the smug grin Epel shot him.
“After you nearly cried when we got our group one? I doubt it.” He teased back, his wavy hair parted over the side and falling a little into his eyes.
He’d need to pin it back for practice.
“Oi! They said rib ones are the worst!” the red head protested, absently nudging the Prefect’s chair out for them with his foot so they could sit.
“Not really an excuse when you cry before they even get the needle out.”
The other four ignored the two’s bickering.
“What do you have planned today?” Deuce asked the Prefect and Grim.
“We have a self-study for potions lab.” They said thoughtfully, taking a bite and then tapping the fork against their lip. “We’ll be trying to perfect the end of term project that Crewel has us all doing.”
“It’s fine, we figured out the step that was causing the reaction between the magora roots and crushed opals.” Grim waved off any concern about the project. “We just had to adjust the temperature and make sure that the magora has dissolved and bonded with the weird whatever-you-call-it syrup before we add the opal.”
“Falarian Honey.” The Prefect reminded him.
“Yeah, that.”
“Afterwards Crowley wanted to discuss some of the plans for next year and get a start on organizing what we have planned for the RSA joint festival.” They continued.
Ace heaved a sigh as he broke away from the argument with Epel.
“I still don’t know why you agreed to intern here.” He said. “Mal-“ “WAKA-SAMA!” “Ugh, King Draconia, offered to let you intern as his personal assistant.”
The Prefect offered a small, fond smile at the thought of their dragon-fae friend.
Things had been a bit…awkward there for a little while when they realized that Malleus had grown romantic feelings towards them.
Especially in light of their own for Sebek.
The Briar King was nothing if not loyal to those he cared for, though, and after a little time to come to terms with it, he and the rest of Diasomnia were happy to support their relationship with their half-fae brother.
They knew that Malleus still loved them, but they hoped one day he would find someone that could love him with their whole heart as he did them. They were so thankful that the fae king didn’t allow his feelings to turn sour and ruin their friendship.
He had explained it to them once, during one of their nightly walks once they had reconnected. Malleus’s dragon instincts wanted them close, wanted to protect them and keep them part of his family. While it wasn’t what he had hoped originally, he was happy for their and Sebek’s happiness and with them as Sebek’s lover that meant they would still remain part of his family. It settled something inside him that prevented the loss wounding him beyond repair.
Lilia had jumped at the chance to ask when they were going to make him a grandpa, much to the Prefect's embarrassment.
Especially when Sebek insisted, without hesitation, that the responsible thing would be to wait until they graduated.
“I know, but I didn’t want to take advantage of Tsunotarou’s kindness.” They said. “And…well…I’m not quite ready to leave NRC just yet.” They admitted softly, glancing around at them with a soft smile.
“Why would you be leaving?” Jack asked as he slipped silently into the kitchen, causing the others except Sebek and Grim to jump slightly.
“Oi, stop doing that, dog-boy or I swear I’ll get one of those bells.” Ace shot over his shoulder as the wolf therianthrope pushed the longer, fluffy bangs out of his face and leaned down to give kisses to the Prefect, Deuce, and Epel.
He purposefully passed over Ace, who responded with flipping him off.
“We were just talking about internship this next year.” The Prefect smiled. “Tsunotarou offered that position as his assistant but I was saying that I kind of want to stay at NRC a little longer.” They explained.
“Still not sure how you can put up with the idiot bird man.” Ace rolled his eyes.
The Prefect giggled at that. “He’s gotten better since first year.” They defended the crow-fae.
Which, yes, he had magically seemed to change his tune after he lost most of his most well known and high ranking students.
No one still knew what happened to Azul and the eel twins, and Leona had graduated suddenly – skipping the internship year somehow – and returned to the Sunset Savanna at his brother's insistence.
Vil had been forced to retire from the public all together after the PR backlash and Rook had gone with him. Idia managed to avoid the whole thing, though that wasn’t too difficult since he hardly left his room.
Still, he had stayed far away from them until he graduated and disappeared off to the Island of Lamentations again with Ortho.
They were pretty sure Ruggie had actually worked out something with Kalim and moved his family to the Scorching Sands, but they weren’t sure about that.
Riddle had apparently wanted to get out of school as fast as possible and did what he had to to skip a year to join Trey and Cater, the three going off on internship together before coming back to graduate and then disappearing again to do something or other in the Queendom.
Ace didn’t really care to figure out what.
All in all, the first years went through their sophomore and junior years as the only ones left from their original friend group (i.e. Overblot gang) on campus.
Crowley became a much more attentive Headmage around that time and while they decided to keep the exterior of Ramshackle…well Ramshackle for aesthetic purposes, he had spared no expense to refurbish the whole dorm with the most up to date amenities.
Insisting that he could certainly never let a student of his live in such conditions, with Crewel brandishing his crop the whole way.
Funny that.
“Besides…” they said with a soft, loving smile as they looked around at the young men they loved more than anything and their partner. “This is where I met all of you…where I’ve been the happiest of my life. I just wanted to enjoy it for one more year.”
The expressions on the others told them that their feelings were understood, and they just laughed when Ace threw his arms around them and tried to pull them into his lap, kissing along their neck.
“How are you so damn cute!? It should be illegal to be this cute! We can’t just leave you here by yourself! Someone will trick you into an unmarked van with candy and kittens!”
The Prefect laughed, struggling against the kisses and tickling, bumping the table a bit and causing Deuce to try and come to their rescue until finally Sebek simply stood and went over to pick the Prefect up under the arms and pull them from between the two and proceeded to carry them back to his seat to place them on his lap.
“YOU ARE NOT ALLOWING THEM TO EAT! HUMANS NEED A HEALTHY DIET TO LIVE A LONG LIFE!” he insisted, earning a kiss on the cheek for his efforts and the Prefect just settled down more comfortably on his lap as Jack pulled their plate over and passed it to the half-fae.
Ace huffed but didn’t argue and just turned back to finish his breakfast.
“So what were you trying to tell us earlier?” Deuce asked, looking to the knight.
“AH! YES! I HAVE WONDERFUL NEWS!” He exclaimed happily, eyes shining with pride. “WAKA-SAMA HAS PREPARED EVERYTHING FOR OUR LOVELY PREFECT AND GRIM TO BE OFFICIAL BRIAR VALLEY CITIZENS!” he said, causing a brilliant smile to bloom on the Prefect’s face.
“That’s great!” Epel said with his own excited smile.
After all, their lover didn’t technically exist legally in their world with no history or records of their life. It had taken Malleus a while to prepare a completely air tight background for their friend that would allow them all the benefits afforded to the rest of those in their world.
As king he could just keep them safe in his kingdom, after all, but with this they could travel anywhere, do anything just as the rest of them. It also gave Grim a measure of protection as a sentient being instead of simply being labeled a ‘monster’ that ran the risk of being captured and carted off somewhere.
The Prefect threw their arms around Sebek’s neck and gave him a tight embrace.
“Thank you so much, Sebek. I know Malleus would have done it anyway but you did so much to help set up the history for us. It really means the world to me.”
Sebek readily wrapped his arms around the smaller human, burying his nose into their neck and just soaking in the feeling of their heart beat and warmth of their body.
“Of course, I would do anything for those I love.” He mumbled into their shoulder.
The Prefect cupped the back of his head, threading their fingers through the longer hair that the half-fae was letting grow out a bit.
They felt Jack’s warm hand against their back and knew Ace, Deuce, and Epel were just as excited for them. It was a protection that they had wanted to give their lover since they arrived and it had finally managed work.
The Prefect was a citizen of Twisted Wonderland.
This was their home.
They were home.
“We will always do anything for you.” Jack whispered, leaning in to nuzzle the side of their head lovingly, tail sweeping back and forth.
The Prefect didn’t even try to hold back their tears. More hands, more warmth surrounded them and it only made them cry harder.
They were so happy.
They were so happy to have been brought here.
So thankful to have earned the love of such wonderful people.
No matter what the future would bring for them, they knew they could handle it together.
Because it had always been and always would be them against the world.
And there was no one else the Prefect would want to face the world with.
=================
Hope you guys like it. I know it's mostly fluff with just like, the barest hints of background Yandere but well...my brain naturally turns towards fluff. Hope you're not too disappointed and that this was an okay conclusion. <3
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half-deadmagicperson · 4 months ago
Text
July 8th- Post Nasty Burger Explosion
Warnings: Referenced Character Deaths
This piece I wasn't able to finish on time, but I fully intend on making it. It has a lot of plot left to go, and I need to edit it, but here's a decent sized snippet of what I have so far :D
(this is also a part of @dp-crossover-angst-week-event )
  The ghost of time gazes sadly upon the young Halfa. How he wishes he could have prevented it. How he wishes to reach out and hold the child close, but he can't.
  After Daniel Fenton's alternate future self caused the death of his family and friends…and teacher, the boy was left in ruins. This boy knew better than to seek aid from Vladimir Masters, but that didn't make him any less broken.
  He needed a place to go, and Clockwork knew just the place.
~~~~~~~~~
  Yarrow, Nettle, Comfrey, Lemon Balm. That should be all of them except fennel. Merlin was spending his afternoon picking herbs for Gaius. The young warlock wandered deeper into the woods, not afraid of whatever he may encounter.
  A quiet groan caught Merlin’s attention.
 “Who's there?”
 The warlock spotted a tuft of black hair in the brush. Coming closer, he spotted a boy lying face first on the ground.
 The boy wore a type of tunic and trousers that Merlin has never seen before, but that wasn't the most shocking part. The boy reeked of death energy, but he was clearly a living boy? Unless this was some sort of disguise.
  The boy shifted and opened his eyes. Bright blue eyes locked onto Merlin.
  “Oh, what the fuck!” Merlin wasn't exactly sure what the word meant, but he was pretty sure it wasn't a nice one.
   “What kinda RPG did Clockwork drop me into??” The boy's accent was strange and nothing like Merlin has ever heard before.
  “Um, you look lost? Do you require assistance?” It was then that the boy's focus shifted back to the young man in front of him.
  “Uh, yeah, could you tell me where I am?”
  “We are about a furlong away from Camelot, I'd say.”
  “Camelot? Like, oh what was his name, King Arthur? And the Knights of the Round Table?”
  “Urm, actually it's Prince Arthur. His father is still alive.” The boy arched his brow.
  “Okay then, so which character are you supposed to be?” 
  “That is a weird way to ask for someone's name, but I am Merlin, Arthur's manservant.”
  “Aren't you supposed to have a beard? And a pointy hat?”
  “A wha-”
  “If you're gonna pretend to be Merlin you gotta have the whole wizard look down! The robe, the hat, the magic staff!”
  “Magic? Magic is banned in Camelot. It has been for years.”
  The boy sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.
  “So let me get this straight: you're Merlin, we're outside of Camelot, magic is illegal, and this is not just some LARPing event?”
 “I don't even know what LARPing is.” The boy extended a hand.
  “Hi, I'm Danny, and I'm from a different time!”
  What did Merlin get himself into now?
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starrook · 16 days ago
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morion canceled class for this. when asked for the reason, it was simple.
" national holiday in my country. "
what was this national holiday, many of his students wondered? nobody could get a straight answer from him, though not via lies or underhanded tactics. as soon as morion announced that there would be no class he was out of the room like someone had set it on fire.
from place to place he lurks. column to column, wall to wall; many onlookers watch, confused at how a man that large thinks he could be in any way stealthy. morion does not care. he's on the move.
finally his quarry is tracked: a mop of blue hair separates itself from the crowd, and morion's smirk grows ten times. he departs from his hiding place with composure, acting as normal. No He Has Not Been Crawling Around The School Like A Big Bug. He's Very Relaxed Right Now!
but when he finally gets to him, his special little alcryst...
all falls to pieces. morion grabs his son and lifts him up, laughing heartily. " HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALCRYST, M'BOY!! " maybe announcing it like this will make others wish his special little boy a happy birthday, too. that would be nice.
" i missed your last one, so this one makes you... nineteen, huh?! " he pats his massive hand on alcryst's head, ruffling it playfully. " just one more year 'till the big two-zero! you can bet your ass i'll be here for that! " circumstances and gods be damned, he'll throw hands before he has to go back in that stupid cathedral.
he sets alcryst down in a less populated part of the courtyard---as, of course, he has dragged his son around without saying anything. he produces a tall gift; not taller than alcryst himself, but it's a decent size. " i'm all about spectacle, and trust me, you'll be getting one HELL of a birthday party later, " morion mutters, smiling only slightly. " but i also wanted to give you something a little more private.
" when we met back up for the first time and you mistook me for a fake, i was horrified at what i'd found out. i can't imagine what it must've been like for you two, back at destinea cathedral. " his voice has waned; it has eroded to something softer and a little more stern. " i caused you and your brother a lot of hurt and didn't even leave anything behind. that ain't right. "
inside the box sits two things: a picture, crudely drawn, and a simple bow, made of elm and reinforced with steel. the wood is lacquered with a deep blue stain and the steel has been buffed obsessively. " so i made you this. it ain't no bow of legend, but...
" i remember the day you told me you wanted to use bows instead of swords. i'd thought, ' ah, hell, how am i gonna teach this kid how to use these damn things? ' " morion laughs at the memory. " but it turns out that you didn't need all that much teaching. we gave you the tools n' you ran with 'em, and look at you now! best archer in brodia, i'd reckon. "
his smile creeps into his eyes, and morion gently hugs alcryst. " happy birthday, alcryst. i'm so happy i can be here to do this, and i'll do my damndest never to leave you two like i had. "
...
" ...now, i'm makin' plans to have a huge dinner tonight. you gonna invite lapis? "
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“Waugh!” Alcryst yelps as he’s lifted into the air with ease. The familiar booming laughter puts him at ease, he’s been through enough birthdays to know the routine. “Dad! Please! I can walk on my own!!” In spite of his protests, Alcryst delights in his father’s love, so grand that even he couldn’t question it. That they could even do this is a miracle in and of itself.
Dad talks about missing the last birthday. Alcryst has no intention to fill in the reason why. “Nineteen, yes…” It’s dizzying to even think about, honestly. Next year he’ll be twenty. That feels ancient, though Alcryst wouldn’t tell Diamant that. Some days he notices signs of him getting older. Mostly in that he’s gotten taller and lost some of his “baby face” as the knights call it. Alcryst doubts he’ll be as tall or muscular as his brother and father, but he can’t deny the distance between him and them isn’t nearly as far. He hopes his father noticed too. He hopes that Father will get to see him next year when he turns twenty, hopefully even taller. Though he’s is quick to remind Alcryst how unlikely this birthday is in the first place. “Father…”
Dad leaves no time to dwell on the matter, though. Immediately Alcryst is presented with a new bow, coated with a smooth blue lacquer and reinforced with steel. “You made this?!” First the violin, now this bow… but it’s not as easy to imagine his father toiling over a bow, to spend countless hours carving wood to just the right shape and ensuring perfect tension for the string. Maybe because it’s hard to imagine Father having the patience for such delicate work. And yet, he did it for him.
…Alcryst blinks back tears, smiling down at the drawing his father included. “Is that me with the bow?” He teases. “Ah… thank you so much, Father. I’ll treasure it always. I’ll wield it in service to Brodia, as faithfully as you did.” The hug comes just in time, just as a tear escapes him.
LAPIS??
How did her name come up?? Alcryst pulls away, hurriedly wiping at his eyes so that he can get a clear view of his father. It’s just as he feared. That look. That knowing smile. The teasing lilt in his voice. Alcryst has been on the receiving end of it many times before. Knowing that his father’s assumptions are finally true doesn’t make it any better.
“...Diamant told you?” Alcryst asks sheepishly. I’m going to kill that traitorous son of a bitch. “Aha, um, I’ll definitely ask if she wants to join…!”
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