#and i get a strong sense of achievement from the things it allows my body to do and its a social thing for me too just so many benefits

[toastsnaffler]

when the post workout worldcrushing depression hits 🤪

[sophieinwonderland]

Hiveminds and Multiplicity

When thinking about Hiveminds, I realized that hivemind connection is a spectrum, with many plural or plural-like experiences across it.

At the same time, both the beginning and end of this spectrum are singlet experiences. I decided to represent this with my own horseshoe theory.

Unconnected Individuals

This is pretty self-explanatory. These are totally separate individuals with their totally separate bodies. These are not even the slightest bit plural. Or, at least, not for any hivemind related reasons.

Mind-Linked

Now we drift into plural territory.

At this point, the individuals have some sort of mental link to each other. Mind links can range in levels of complexity.

At a low level, this may mean feeling each other's emotions or sensing when something really bad happens with no words or other communication. The most basic form of this might be "twintuition" in shows, where twins can magically sense when something happens to another no matter where they are.

At high levels, this can come with full verbal communication and other hallucinatory experiences.

Mind-linked systems often have strong barriers between them, only being able to transfer limited information, and maybe only in specific circumstances.

But the mind-linked are having plural experiences. They have someone else feeling their emotions, hearing their thoughts. It's very similar to sharing your mind with headmates. As this connection grows, they may end up becoming...

The Multiple Hivemind

At the top most point of the horseshoe, all mental barriers have been torn down.

They're still multiple people. They still have their own individual identities. But the link has become so great that they can read each other's thoughts whenever they want. They can share memories and skills freely between them, being both multiple and completely connected at the same time.

The Median Hivemind

Having achieved perfect connection, identity starts to erode. The median hivemind starts becoming its own collective identity.

Individuals in the median hivemind still retain agency and sense of self, but are also blending together more now and feel less like separate people.

The True Hivemind

At this point, there is no distinction between identity of the members. The hivemind is now one singlet spread across multiple bodies. A contrast and opposite to traditional plurality, which is multiple agents in one body.

...

We Can Get Weird With This...

Okay, that's a basic overview of how hiveminds work and evolve with singlets. But... what if some members of the hivemind aren't singlets?

Now things are going to get weird because hiveminds and mental links enable a lot of peculiar things that wouldn't be possible otherwise.

What if an old headmate goes dormant for years. In that time, the system becomes linked to a hivemind and specifically become either a median or true hivemind where they all identify as the same thing? What if that headmate comes back to find everyone else in the system is part of this hivemind with their identities melded into it, but the new headmate is still separate?

Or what if a multiple hivemind enabled headmates originating in the same body to front in multiple bodies at once, essentially allowing system hopping as a thing in those specific circumstances? What one of the members of an in-sys relationship used someone else's body (consensually) to be with their partner?

Or what if, for whatever reason, only one member of the system had the connection to the hivemind while the rest didn't?

Or... imagine that there are two systems with a strong mental link. They become a multiple hivemind with headmates able to speak freely to each other and even share an inner world. Then two headmates, one from each system, interact more and end up fusing. What does this mean? Which body is theirs? What happens if the link is severed?

Or in the same vein, what if a hivemind starts out as existing between 5 singlets? They become connected and end up being a multiple hivemind, and share an inner world. What if the hivemind created a tulpa together in this inner world, and none of the members are sure whose tulpa it actually counts as?

...

Anyway, if there's any takeaway from this, it should be that plurality is weird. Hiveminds are weird. And put them together and you get a weird sandwich. 😁

[libbee]

8th House Melodious Interpretations

These notes are taken from https://carmenturnerschott.com/category/8th-house/ These are not my words, not my work.

After studying astrology for several years, it became evident to me that the most powerful house in our astrological chart was the eighth house.

We attract the wounded like a magnet.

We take the risk of being hurt, but that is the mission of the eighth house person. To take risks and be vulnerable is being strong.

By truly being vulnerable with another person and truly allowing someone into our lives and heart we can heal our own pain. We can’t do it alone.

Like Pandora’s box being opened for the first time, everything we don’t want to see will be released.

I learned more about myself from them and the hidden destiny of an eighth house person. The destiny is that of a healer.

It is through experiencing deep hurt that we can truly understand the pain of others. The eighth house person is meant to delve into and dive deep into the emotional waters and experience all the deeper emotions under the surface. By experiencing these deeper emotions we become aware of others pain, not just our own.

They transform and take all of those memories, emotions and thoughts and morph into an entire new person. This ability to regenerate, transform inside creates healing and with time they are able to truly forgive although they never forget.

A voice inside tells them “get up”.

She told me once that she often feels that something in her dies and she suddenly feels completely different.

Through emotional death, psychological death and symbolic death most eighth house people transform who they are.

They are meant to.

They are meant to become beacons of hope for those who are hopeless. They are meant to be a listening ear for those who have sad stories to tell. They are meant to be there for someone who needs a good friend and a good hug in a moment of devastation. They are meant to be there for those who are in the dark knight of the soul because they are truly able to understand.

Secretive, private, mysterious and deep

Growing spiritually, and achieving a deep insight into others, is the gifts of this house.

They can feel like no one understands them and that no one else in their life thinks or feels as they do.

These individuals are feeling other’s energies, auras, thought forms and emotions. This is being one with others, not separate.

They always have a sense of their own mortality.

True healers, body workers, counselors and psychics usually have planets in the eighth house.

The most important thing to remember is that the eighth house does not lie. 

[skaldish]

Hi there, hope all’s well! 🌷

I just came across your post about the emotional starvation of (cis) boys (excellent visualization of what the majority of boys/men go through from the get go).

In my day to day life I offer services and rituals to celebrate and honor women in ways that the world often has not; and I work to be all inclusive (nb, trans, and whatever might fall in between or outside of that). This work uses, showcases, AND teaches this feeling of sorority/sisterhood/community safety.

In order to balance out towards the other side—because I have been saying this same thing about boys and men missing this vital bit of living, and therefor perpetuating the rift between men and women whether they want to or not— I’ve started apprenticing as a barber. This seems to me to be one of the “softest” self care rituals men indulge in.

Would you say, in your experience, that this type of self care and perhaps the celebration/ritualization of milestones could help boys and men interact in healthier ways with their own masculinity, and the world at large?

I mean…yes and no.

Yes, because rituals and rites are nourishment for the soul, and no, because the kind of approach you're suggesting is designed to address systemic marginalization rather than systemic isolation. The reason why you don't already see cis men seek empowerment in relation to their gender because they don't need to be.

Instead, what they covet is to belong in despite of it.

See, the way we raise boys—and the experiences boys have growing into men—teach and reinforce this specific narrative:

"It doesn't matter who I am as a person, what my personality is like, or how strong of a bond someone forms with me; the moment I'm [too girly / too manly / not manly enough / the wrong kind of man / etc] my belonging is revoked and I'm disowned."

This is a trauma so ubiquitous within our Western society that many of us write it off as a feature of the XY chromosomes as opposed to conditioning. It's as omnipresent to men as objectification is to women, and equally as despised.

The origin of male isolation comes from the same place as everyone else's disenfranchisement: Western Imperialism. Western imperialism teaches us that the way we get anything good in this world is through acts of conquest:

"We become happy by conquering sadness." "We become healthy by conquering our bodies." "We become good people by conquering the parts of us that are bad." "We become good adults by conquering our behavior as children." "We become masculine by conquering effeminacy." "We become cherished and loved by conquering the parts of ourselves that are problematic and detested." Etc.

The only way I was every able to really truly heal my lifelong traumas was by ending the reign of conquest in myself. Conquest is what traumatized me to begin with, so ending conquest is what allowed me to heal.

My guess is that the same logic can be applied on a societal scale. But it would mean changing the way we go about achieving results.

(I also want to point out that cis men actually have tons of rituals and rites of passage in relation to healthy masculinity. They're just covert, and rather than speak to one's sense of agency—which is something cis women and trans* folks desire in relation to their genders—they speak to one's sense of belonging, which is, again, what cis men desire in relation to theirs.)

It's a huge topic. It's taken days for me to even write this reply because there's so much about it I could say. Let me know if you want me to address something specific.

[a-s-levynn]

@lovingache @reveries-of-my-mind @sleepanonymous Sorry you had to wait this much but i fell asleep and then work happend and i rewrote the entire post because it made so little sense and yeah..

I certainly can't be brief with this so i'm gonna insert a cut but if you are interested, this is what ST helped and still helps me work through during my still ongoing journey of selfacceptance.

It is kind of messy, there is a lot of rambling and wandering of thoughts but finally here it is.

A lot of this is, i'm sure of it, is going to sound very familiar to you because there is a reason we gravitate towards Sleep Token. Yeah memes are fun, much shapes, the guys are cryptids, Vessel has a nice body, III is the fun chaos noodle ballerina whatever, II is cute how he simps for Vessel from behind the drumkit when he isn't destroying it, IV is obejctively the sexy one and all the shenanigens. Whatever. We all know. BUT. If we are honest we love all of it because how it was built up. Because we are all a bit broken inside in ways. And we have a way to channel it in a way many of us never been able to before. We are allowed to be broken and exist in a space where it is okay. It is understood. Like.. Never in my entire life been so comfortable with the scars on my arms as is was when i was waiting in que before an ST ritual. Just sayin..

But back to the topic. Sorry i'm prone to wander.

It's hard to get this together in a way that isn't too much about me but it is not an easy task let me tell you. I'll put a link to an abbreviated version of how i got to be the person i am because it retrospectively will add some additional context to this entire thing, but that's fully optional. But first:

a little context on how i fell into the ST pit anyway: I first found them when the second ep released. I liked the look, i checked them out solely because that masked look interesting, but i really did not vibed with the music. I wasn't listening to the lyrics.

Next time they came into my field of vision before the release of TPWBYT. I still wasn't fully sold but there were a few tracks that got trough to me from Sundowning. Still not all of it. I wasn't paying attention still.

And then the end of last year came and something started an itch in my brain to take them out again.. and i finally sat down and read the lyrics properly. I never in my entire life sobbed so uncontrollably like when i first experienced Atlantic with actually paying attention to the lyrics.

And then the TMBTE singles started to release, then the album came. It's not a coincidence i said it's akin to a pilgrimage. It was an emotional pilgrimage to me, and still is every time i do it. And i was fairly normal about all of it. It hit me for sure, but i actually was lost when i finally saw them live. It just broke through like a dam in a flood. That concentrated energy is something that is hard to describe. Anyway. Now here i am.

So the things Sleep Token helped me with, that 10+ years of objectively unsuccesful therapy miserably failed to achieve.

being able to cry properly

being unapologetic about what i like

being able to start to feel my feelings

being unashamed by feelings that are generally considered problematic

being able to process in a much more healthy way if something is not okay in my head

ST gave me a healthier coping album to listen to when i'm on my lows

I'm not saying i'm perfectly fine by a weave of a magical drumstic, what i'm saying is that i stab myself significantly less when i can't focus for the life of me.

So maybe go over the bulletpoints i guess?

1. crying

With ST i felt finally seen in a way i never had before. I never was a cryer, but since i actually got into ST, i do sometimes. Not all the time but probably a far healthier amount then before. Because not crying is unhealthy. It doesn't make you strong and all that crap. It just adds to the unnecessary weight you carry. Some realize this sooner and i'm so happy for them beause it is important.

2. being unapologetic of my interests

I meantioned it before, an it was what sprang this entire long ass post to existance, but let it be here as well: i was unlearning a lot of thing and being apologetic over what i like is one for them. And i was progressively better and better at it, but like lately it just blew through the stratosphere because one cannot talk about Sleep Token and not sound kind of mental at least a bit. And at this point i don't give a shit. I like what i like, it doesn't hurt anyone. If someone laughs at me for it? Good for them at least i made them smile.

The context of this is a friendgroup i was in from around 14 to 20 and it had good paarts but ultimately was an emotionally controlling one, which i realized far too late. And it already created patterns and habits. Needless to say, i don't talk to any of them anymore.

3. feeling the feelz

This is where i'm going to start to sound really weird i think but who knows.. maybe more of you are in the same shoes than i would think.

From a considerably young age i was repressing basically every strong emotion possible. Happyness, sadness, excitement even anger to a certain degree. It started with the sadness, and emotional pain but as with everything it spiraled out to the rest of my emotions. I was also basically in a constant fight or flight mode which just propells you forward at any given time, when you should have stopped to feel shit.

And after a while that creates this weird dissonance of not really feeling anything and at the same time having the empathy, emotional maturity and social awareness to understand how others feel in given situations. Moreover i was acutely aware how i should feel in certain moments, it just.. never really happend. I knew the correct answers to the proverbial questions but my brain just put up a wall and never let me actually feel anything. I was simply empty.

This created the perfect blank slate for me to be the quote on quote emotional mirror for all my friends and even family at times. So usually people came and still come to me to be a sort of free therapist or something like that. Just spitballing what they are going through and reflecting it back to help them understand. And don't get me wrong i love helping people, i really do, and also when the conversation is over, some of their relief is left behind for me and it was at least something.

But at the end of the day i was constantly left with this feeling of "who am i in all this?" , "where is the person whom i can call me?" and that is a very lonely place of being. Especially when you are younger. (This is i think, at least partially, why i may have caught on to the vibe what Vessel supposed to be about. Because either i like it or not, i get what it's like. At least a version of it. To be so empty that anything and everything that creates the illusion of feeling something, anything, it is good enough for the moment.)

And here comes Sleep Token again. Because the songs are highly, highly emotional. And here comes the brilliance of Vessel as a character because by design a vessel is a blank slate. Could be anyone, because it is supposedly empty. Which is a very familiar state of being for me. And that is what made for me so easy to connect and by proxy going through the motions and start to get eased into being comfortable with feeling things again.

It still in it's infancy, that is why i'm a wreck at days, because i'm still relearning stuff that was last natural for me around two decades ago. But i wanna get there. When i can just feel, without guidance. But this is something none of my supposedly professional therapist knew what to do with.

And here comes this british sadboy with his masks and bodypaint and i'm finally nudged away from point zero? Yeah, you can bet your ass i'll take my chances and be grateful for the rest of my life no matter how far it gets me. If it is a tenth of an inch than it is a tenth of an inch. It is still more progress than i ever had before.

4. being unashamed of feelz

Sounds contradictory to the previous point but not really. If you ever felt.. for example let's say obession, true obession you know it's not like any other feeling. It works differently. Not easily controllable and it could lead to anger and rage, end in agression, all sorts of not so great things.

These are stuff we all try to repress for understanable reasons. This is the stuff we know are bad because they usually can lead to bad things. We hear it all our lives. They aren't bad. Not necesseraly. So we shouldn't be afraid to feel them. Not without understanding they are there, either one wants it or not. These are just as natural than any other feeling and no less dangerous than the rest.

They are part of the human condition. But we need to learn to live with them and control them. Repressed things tend to just explode one day and that is when the damage happens. When something can exist in a controlled enviroment, and can be observed from different angles it can be understood. And we are usually not afraid of things we understand. We deal with them. That is the whole point.

And yet again, obsession is a heavy and somewhat recurring theme in ST lyrics either actually or on a meta level if you pay attention. And the way it is presented and integrated into the whole of the story created with the discography is what solidifies it as, a thing than can be observed. It can be understood.

And the honesty of how it is presented what makes me comfortable with the fact that no, i'm not a freak, i'm not abnormal because of it. But there is a conscientious choice to be made how i deal with it. How i learn to direct it to something positive and create something with it, insted of going the other way.

It's like murder. Everyone thinks about it. It doesn't mean everyone is a potential murderer waiting to snap. Fuck no. But we do think about it. Is it okay to think about it a lot? It's not my place to decide how much is too much. But thinking isn't the problem. It is how we talk about the fact that we think about it, can be a problem. Anyway i'm diverging to much into philosophising territories. It happens, sorry.

5. processing the mess in my head

This is a pretty straightforward one actually. My mind is a mess. My long term memory is patchy, the short term one is barely existant. I understand a lot of the world in certain ways but i know so little in others. ST makes me think a lot more.

I always catch a word or a phrase or a line, maybe a verse, that lodges itself behind my eye for a time and i just keep it rolling. Associating on it, connecting it to other stuff. It stops me for a minute and forces me to roll an idea over and over and over and over again in my head and just run with it until i end up with some sort of epiphany.

It doesn't have to be a big thing, it can be the smallest thing, something like a shiny glass ball in a box of far more interesting toys. But it is my glass ball, I picked the colour inside.

6. a healthier coping album

Yeah this one.. So for the longest time when my mind got murky and getting too lost into the void, music was what could drag me out of it. Since i was a kid, the album that could kick me back towards the tracks was Phobia from Breaking Benjamin. I put it on an usually by the end of it i sort of was back on a functioning state. Not a good place but a functionig one. But if you ever heard the album in it's entirety, it is hardly an uplifting one.

Now when i feel low i roll the first two ST albums in sequence. By the time i reach missing limbs i feel actually better. My mom put it to words really well when she said "I don't understand the words of what this man is singing about but i can guess he is not happy. Is it about sad things right? I feel that. But i like it because it feels more comforting instead of making me sad as well." And that i thinks sums it up pretty well. Because it is no longet the outstreched hand of you-are-not-alone but the outstreched soul that cries you-can-find-yourself-in-me. And that is the definition of comforting for me. (Yes i love that phrace because it fits, let me be proud of myself for saying something that sounds good for once.)

And that is pretty much it for now. There should be a few more things ST is a reasonably large part of my self-journey but i've gotta think on it more i think. I'm not even sure i realize all of it.

I'll link a separete post here at the end which sums up how i got to this place i am. It is heavily abbreviated but it is still feels too long. It is certainly far more personal than this but i think it adds context to what was written above. But i don't want to clutter this one with that kind of personal stuff, also it's just an optional thing for anyone who wishes to maybe understand me a bit better and where i come from. [link to said post] Just for the record: this post does mention mental a physical abuse (no sexual one), self harm, mental issues, so all the fun stuff, but does not detail it.

[belit0]

I think Control by Halsey fits Itachi well

IN FACT YES, after reading the lyrics I had to start immediately with this request because it is a perfect match🙌🏻

for context, Uchiha! reader

"They send me away to find them a fortune, a chest filled with diamonds and gold." The dark room is filled with the sound of a distorted, incorporeal voice, a tone so low it could be interpreted as the devil himself speaking. There is something sinister in its words, evil, coldness, and each sentence rolling through the place sends a shiver of terror down her spine. (Y/N) looks from one side to the other, trying to find the source of the sound, where it comes from, but she can't make out anything among so much black.

She wakes up disoriented, lost, with no idea where she is or how she got there, immersed in an oppressive darkness that does not allow her to distinguish even her hands in front of her. Genjutsu? There is no other way to achieve such a powerful effect.

"The house was awake, the shadows and monsters, the hallways, they echoed and groaned." The voice continues, an unnatural wail this time from a different place, its trajectory swirling around her. The man moves, closer yet extremely far away at the same time, impossible to perceive.

"I sat alone, in bed till the morning-“

"They're coming for me!" she interrupts, cutting off the monologue of whoever is there with her. Her only chance is to alert him with her family name, scare him with the Uchiha reputation. Altered are her senses, each time she tries to read the chakra in the room a barrier plunges over her, blocking any guidance she can gain. Her captor seems to have studied her, alternatively knowing her well, for he is properly aware of dealing with a powerful shinobi.

"No one is coming for you, they're all dead, (Y/N). I tried to hold these secrets inside me, my mind's like a deadly disease, I couldn't." The man seems to be getting closer, each word a step nearer, his voice booming against the walls and stalking her from all directions at the same time. It is impossible to perceive his direction, but his proximity becomes more and more apparent.

"I'm bigger than my body, I'm colder than this home, I'm meaner than my demons, I'm bigger than these bones..." A hand brushes the back of her neck, moving her hair and making a small cry of surprise escape her. The caress is as quick as it is short, a millisecond of contact that makes her blood boil, angry at not being able to detect who is holding her captive, who stole her in the middle of the night, who was talented enough not to alert her instincts.

(Y/N) went to bed after an exhausting day, happy to finally get some rest, and now wakes up knee-deep in some psycho's shit.

Her hands desperately grope the floor looking for something, an object to hold and defend herself with, but the only thing she finds is a sticky and presumably warm liquid. Fresh blood permeates the atmosphere with a strong metallic smell.

"And all the kids cried out, "Please stop, you're scaring me", yet I had to kill them all. I can't help this awful energy, god damn right, you should all be scared of me." Another hand brushes her knee, the woman crouching on the ground and looking around, trying to clear the darkness from the place with the help of her Sharingan. Her eye power seems to be countered by renowned techniques in the clan, moves that only Uchiha would use to fight each other, strategies no enemy should ever know about.

"Who is in control?" she asks in a desperate attempt to find information, for her captor to be as cynical as to give himself away and seek morbid credit for his actions, wanting recognition. The only response she receives is a hysterical, distorted, terrifying laugh, a sound that makes her feel exposed like prey in front of a predator.

"I paced around for hours on empty, I jumped at the slightest of sounds, I couldn't stand the person inside me, I turned all the mirrors around" his story is as theatrical as it is incoherent, the man does not seem interested in killing her, hurting her, he would have done it already. His focus seems to be on (Y/N)'s attention, in making the woman listen to his every word and feel scared of the situation.

Suddenly, a hand closes around her throat, fingers squeezing her soft skin with killing force, seizing darkness hovering over her and not allowing her to see who is brutally holding her. "I'm well acquainted with villains that live in my head, they beg me to write them so they'll never die when I'm dead." The air rapidly escapes her lungs without receiving more oxygen in return, eyesight blurred by the pressure and on the verge of fainting.

Perhaps this is the end, and her attacker's ulterior motives will remain secret in the face of her death. She successfully claws at the skin of the one who suffocates her, trying to find a weak point, contact on which to exert force and free herself, but she seems to be dealing with someone who knows what he is doing.

She mentally says goodbye to her family, to her beautiful clan, regretting not being able to be of more help to the Uchiha causes, sorry not to be able to say goodbye to her beautiful boyfriend. For some reason, she knows she has no use fighting against the one who holds her, as if her body recognizes the man's touch but her mind does not.

She knows who this is.

The hand disappears just in the nick of time, all the lights turning on and the Genjutsu imprisoning his senses disappearing.

"I'm bigger than my body." (Y/N) coughs violently, holding the area the man squeezed and trying to regain control of her body. She can't pay attention to anything for a few minutes, trying vehemently to pull herself together and not show weakness in front of her captor, but when she finally focuses her eyes again, the first thing she sees is ANBU sandals.

"I'm colder than this home." She identifies the location as the Uchiha leader's house, Fugaku's meeting room, the chamber where she herself spent entire afternoons receiving details of missions and orders to follow for the sake of the family.

There is fresh blood on the floor, the wet sensation she felt under her hands confirms her suspicions to be true. Meters away from where she herself sits, both the leader's and his wife's bodies lie lifeless, tragically one on top of the other. "I'm meaner than my demons." Her mind travels with speed, desperate to comprehend the scene, looking down at her hands and taking her first look at her captor. Wild eyes and activated Sharingan seamlessly identify Itachi, the man grinning madly and showing off a new ocular power.

The Mangekyōu? How did he get it?

"I'm bigger than these bones." The Uchiha hovers over her, taking advantage of her astonishment to knock her completely to the ground and position himself on top, observing (Y/N) with an unrecognizable look on his face. Her boyfriend reduces her to a mess of tears and confusion, not understanding anything about the situation, not comprehending why Itachi is dressed as ANBU in the middle of the night, why he tortured her psychologically in his father's meeting room, and why he murdered them.

"Please stop, you're scaring me, Itachi!" She cries disconsolately, forgetting for a moment all her abilities, showing herself as a little girl in front of a fierce wolf, surrendered to the intensity and intimidation her own boyfriend builds in her.

"God damn right you should be scared of me, I can't help this awful energy. Who is in control?"

The world spins in pain and suffering as a stabbing sensation pierces her chest, cold metal puncturing her skin just above her heart, tearing her body mercilessly, and pouring more blood over the existing one.

(Y/N) convulses at the attack, unprepared and helpless to defend herself against the love of her life, surrendered to his terrible will and with no choice about her future. The kunai buries itself with hatred, anxiety, and sadness in her flesh, sinking deeper and deeper into her muscles, painting the scene a deep red color.

Itachi wants to break her chest and take all the love she has for him, to hold it in his hands and smash it in her face, to shatter the affection they both constructed for each other, to eliminate any trace of passion between them.

The last vision (Y/N) has is of her beloved outraging her skin, stealing her life little by little.

[erosauriarts]

AU Idea - Grim Reaper

I really wanted to type this before I forgot. I'm already working on like 6 other fanfics. It's unfortunate I have the 'don't-post-till-its-finished' curse. But *twirls* alas.

Content warning- Canon typical suicide mentions.

There is no separation of ADA and Port Mafia. This is a modernish AU. I really like the aesthetic of flip phones and box TVs; so this would be set in 2005-2010. It's inspired by Ghost Whisper and Poltergeist.

There is no religion in my afterlife lore. The grim take souls to shift them to the next step. They are unable to fully grasp what fate gives people. To become a grim; death themself has to accuse of trying to cheap it. He punishes them for taking their life for granted. Death is also super lenient as they are unforgiving. Grims have a physical form; but quite a bit of them are ashamed to live among people.

Spirits can actually escape grim. This being an ongoing issue where it can be hard to locate some souls since it happens unexpectively. Sudden death [ex: murder] makes it hard for Grim to sense the human body passing. The smell of the dying to Grim smells sweet; depending on the stength of the smell is how close they are to death.

The ghosts that's refuse to pass are called the remained. They grow attached to people or objects; depending on the obsession can determine their power. There is no good energy after a human soul is exposed to the in-between. What starts off as someone who wants to protect loved ones; will then switch to controlling them and/or shift to killing them [psychology].

There is a privately owned agency that specializes in ghost interactions. They get called to talk and communicate with the dead to remove them from the home.

The Agency

Instead of Dazai being obsessed with suicide because he's trying to fill some achievement; he should be obsessed with it bc he wants to communicate with the dead. He's heard about the connection can be achieved by near deaths. The grim are aware of this, so they avoid letting him die. He comes off as immortal. He has the ability to see and hear ghosts; however they are severely repelled by the curse death gave him.

Atsushi was nearly killed by his foster father. He was teetering when a grim took pity on him and asked for a second chance for the kid. Death allowed it. Atsushi tries to remember and find the grim that saved him; but is unable to complete this mission. He is only able to hear ghosts and has severe empathy to their emotions [consider it like a second set of emotions]... this tends to get him possessed if the remained is strong.

Ranpo was 14 when he nearly died in a gas leak. The event tolled him of everyone he cared about and nearly took his own life. He did die for a brief moment; seeing the grim take his family. However; the fire department saved and cpr him. He demanded to die too, but the grim told him not yet. He openly despises the grim; leading conflicts with relationships since many see grim as a part of life. He can only see visions if he presented with evidence of their death. This makes the moving on process much faster.

Kunikida was a math teacher that nearly took his own life. Halfway through the act, however, he sees a little girl nearly doing the same thing. He saves her but in the process falls and dies. The grim assigned to him was unsure what to do, they decided to bring him back as a second chance for him to appreciate something he just saved. His goal is to figure out what exactly they want from him and refuse to except it's because he deserves a second chance.

Yosano was a natural born meduim. She can see, hear, and smell ghosts. Her soul allures the ghosts, and for years the remained tormented by angery ghosts that want to be listened to. They would keep her up, make her uncomfortable, and even psychologically torment her till she did what they wanted. However, her parents did not entertain this idea, accusing her of lying. She was submitted to psychiatric help when a teen. The ghosts there were worse. Ranpo had a vision, and Fukuzawa ends up saving her.

Akutagawa joins on the mission to kill death itself. He was sickly as a kid and would beg for release but he still survived. His goal become concrete when his school friends all pass in a bus accident. He feels death is tormenting him in specific. He has no connection to ghosts, but has knowledge in remedies and rituals to contain, summon, or sooth some souls. He's also opinionated with the grim; calling them slackers and they should have just kill whoever asks for it.

Fukuzawa is the owner of the company. His family was a long line of natural born mediums. He started the company to try to help Ranpo be able to use his visions for good. He ultimately found out his agency became a safe haven for tormented mediums.

Other members are to be decided; or to be added in later dates.

The Grim

The first grim; Mori. He tends to be the one that runs everything. I keep debating if I want to make him death himself. He tends to be lax with who dies; and is often the one to greet Dazai when he attempts. He's chill and rather happy for a grim. He became a grim because he died by suicide after he found out his daughter was murdered. He's been around the longest and since decided he likes being a grim.

Poe is a grim that gets assigned to keep an eye on the agency. He's shy and asocial with his approach; but ultimately decides to hide since Ranpo keeps chasing him off. He's responsible for helping the remained move on when the agency purges them. Since he's important; this leads to conflict with Ranpo and Akutagawa. He became a grim after he dies from starvation and substance abuse. The grim called him "the one that wrote his death" since he finished an entire novel while he suffered. Death felt it was ironic; making him a grim to teach him that there is more to life than a legacy. Poe struggles to see this through most of the story; but the agency makes him see.

Chuuya is half grim. Like I said earlier, grim also have a physical form. He's... not blessed because he can kill people; and/or can smell death. He has a naturally instinct to touch people who are dying and help them pass. However, this does not go well. Several of his elders call him the devil's touch. He covers his hands and remains physically isolated. He later finds out he is also able to draw life back, but to his younger self thought death was the next step. He is able to hear, see, feel, and can touch the dead.

Paul is a grim that takes the position to watch over Chuuya. He takes quite a bit of his time teaching him about his partial grim abilities and was ultimately the one that lead Chuuya to join the agency. He, however, hates Dazai and will purposely make shit as hard as he can. He's cold and blunt and often comes off as merciless. He became a grim because he used to be a killer. Death accused him of playing the part of death, now he must see true suffering. Paul was forced to assist the death of people he cares about; since then has changed his opinion.

---

I'll add to this slowly; but this is what I day dreamed enough.

Any questions or ideas for other characters; I would love to hear- I love creating so xD

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

People often ask me about DnD classes for my OCs but I don't know jack nor squat about DnD classes. So I took the DnD quiz for all of them to see which they'd actually fit!

tl;dr Dove is straight-up Monk (with Cleric and Paladin as runner-ups), Srentha is also Monk (but with Bard as a close second), Leyla is again a Monk (with heavy Wizard leanings), and Evangeline kept tying but I'll call her Sorceror because that was consistently the highest tied score (but she also scored high for Barbarian and Warlock).

Dove:

100% Monk, and I think it fits her quite nicely!

"The monk is a disciplined warrior of mind, body, and spirit, embodying harmony, self-mastery, and enlightenment. They are ascetics who have devoted themselves to a life of rigorous training and spiritual discipline, seeking to transcend the limitations of the mortal realm. Monks harness the power of ki, an inner energy that flows through all living beings, enabling them to perform extraordinary feats of agility, speed, and resilience. Through meditation and martial arts, they achieve a state of inner peace and focus, allowing them to unleash their full potential in combat. Monks often follow a code of ethics or philosophy, which guides their actions and shapes their worldview. Whether serving as humble protectors of their monastic order, wandering philosophers seeking enlightenment, or righteous warriors defending the innocent, monks embody the virtues of balance, discipline, and inner strength."

Srentha:

Also got Monk, but was SO close to getting Bard! (And from what I hear, Bard is a good class for his eccentric and entertaining friend-making self.) He seems to be the most balanced among different class characteristics so far.

Leyla:

Okay, all of my Azarathean characters are getting Monk and I'm laughing. The core tenet of their belief system is peace, okay. Meditation and mindfulness are parts of the package deal. But Wizard was a close second for her!

Kary:

If she doesn't get Druid, I will be amazed. That's the nature class, right? Forests and animals are Kary's Things.

Okay, color me amazed? Kary got Barbarian with 95% and Druid was only 70!

"The barbarian is a primal force of nature, embodying raw strength, unbridled fury, and untamed wilderness. They are warriors who eschew the trappings of civilization, preferring instead to embrace their innate instincts and physical prowess. Barbarians are driven by a deep connection to their primal roots, drawing strength from the untamed landscapes they call home. Their rage is both a weapon and a shield, fueling their ferocity in battle while also providing a means of survival in harsh environments. Despite their outward appearance of savagery, barbarians often possess a keen intuition and a strong sense of loyalty to their tribes or companions. They are fierce defenders of their homeland and fiercely independent individuals, embodying the wild spirit that courses through their veins. In essence, the barbarian is a primal guardian of the natural world, embodying the untamed essence of the wilderness itself."

And you know what, that's actually PERFECT for her.

Just for fun, I want to see what Evangeline would get, perhaps one of the only characters I've ever written that lands solidly in the Evil alignment:

Evangeline:

...Hm, apparently when you get multiple results, you don't get to read what the tied classes are.

She tied for Warlock and Sorcerer, both at 95%.

So I retook it, tweaked some results, and somehow STILL got her tied, this time between Barbarian and Sorcerer, both at 90%.

So I can't get a description, but I'm going to assume Sorcerer for her.

Is sorcerer a good class for someone who's selfish, hedonistic, driven by fury, and ferociously loyal to those she considers friends?

[potatopossums]

partnered aro here.

i have been having some thoughts about what it's like to be in a relationship, even if it's difficult to label what type of relationship it is (romantic, queerplatonic, alterous, etc.). I've also been having some thoughts about my queer identity in regards to how my aromanticism affects my lesbianism and vice versa, and their relationship to gender. it's probably worth a larger post, but if anyone is curious or has comments to add about their experiences, please feel free to ask/comment/reblog/direct message.

incompletely, things I've learned so far whilst in a partnership:

Sex is cool to think about but not so much fun in practice..... irl, it can be absolutely fabulous; it can also be alright; it can also be a little boring and uncomfortable. the best part is, i don't have to do it if i don't feel like it. that's pretty cool. who cares if my medication is lowering my libido (and who cares if my meds aren't the problem, and I'm just a sex-favorable/neutral ace).

Sex usually consists of me pleasuring my partner and jerking myself off afterward, and I'm okay with that...... it's not always one-sided giving (and if you honestly think that giving to your partner is one-sided by default, as if you're suffering through the giving and waiting painfully for your turn, you really need to reevaluate how you're doing sex, because I'm sitting there enjoying watching my partner, exploring her body, listening to her breathing, reacting to her movements, and all of that is very enjoyable for me while I'm giving. orgasm is not the end all be all of sex). plus, i don't tend to receive orgasms because i have vaginismus, which doesn't allow others to penetrate me. i can penetrate myself and achieve orgasm when I'm controlling everything, but it is uncomfortable and painful still for others to control penetration, which is required for my orgasm. that said, i also receive external, non-penetrative touch and stimulation (such as receiving head: wowie 😵‍💫🥵). for where i am, I'm comfortable with things, and that's great.

Sex with myself is so good..... my brain has always been really good at thinking up fun scenarios that excite and turn me on. i know exactly what images push me to orgasm. i like orgasming. thanks to my medications, the orgasms aren't as strong, but i know what time of day to masturbate so that i actually can orgasm. i don't always masturbate nowadays, but when I do, it's a really lovely self care moment, and i wish masturbation was talked about that way more often. it's not for everyone, but I've definitely heard masturbation referred to as anything from "something lonely, loser singles do" to "not nearly as good as being with someone" and i honestly beg to differ on both of those. masturbating is not an indicator of loneliness or inadequacy, and it's not some second-rate pleasure in comparison to sex with a partner. masturbation is its own action, its own thing, and it has no moral or status implications. i love doing it, and i always have, and i love doing it alone.

I get the most out of sex when it's framed as a sensual experience, rather than a sexual one..... like ok, I'm not the best at figuring out the difference between sexual versus sensual, but I'm mostly interested in what feels good. if the only thing that separates them is genital touch or sexual arousal, then fine. but sometimes non-sexual touch arouses me sexually! so, in my mind, what is the point of separating them, i ask! if sex feels good, then it was a good sensual experience. if you're not paying attention to how things feel regarding your five (5) senses during sex, I'm not sure what else you're paying attention to? i mean, no shade to paying attention to other things that don't fit in the senses category, and no shame to people who categorize these experiences differently. those experiences and perspectives are valuable and wonderful! for me, it's just all sensual, even if it's sexual too. sexual gratification, for me, is in a sensual category (and also a mental one, but usually my mental additions to sexual experiences are visual in nature, such as picturing a scene/location or a fictional character).

this is all i have for now, but if i think of more things, I'll reblog and add more to this list.

as always, i welcome discussion on these topics, as it is so important for our community to share and connect over similar and differing experiences! celebrating these things about ourselves is essential to our pride, and we deserve to be ourselves fully and openly.

[chawarin-panich]

“ i remember our first kiss. ”

@kun-is-my-daddy had prompted the same thing and theoretically he will be getting his other prompt filled. I am sorry for trying to write collapsing timelines after getting high, knowing full well that tenses are my ultimate enemy. I hope you like this and this makes more sense to you than my poor brain going and WHICH LEO IS THIS AGAIN

----

title: and we are here

pairing: kunessi

rating: PG-13 It takes some time for them to return to their room. It’s partly because Leo can’t move an inch without five people seeking his attention but also because - holy shit - they’ve finally done it.

All of them. 

And Kun wants to be with his teammates because it’s not just a game or a tournament, is it? It’s every day and every year they have spent together, it’s every failure and success, it's every person who’s gotten into this jersey and dreamed these dreams together. 

Kun wishes he were younger so that he could share it with those he looked up to, the way the kids look at him. He wishes he were younger so that it would feel less final, swimming in a sea of possibility instead of finally finishing a marathon that he’s been running his whole life. With Nico screaming in his ear it's easy to forget that it's a race he technically never finished. Leo has the good sense to seek out a towel so they can dry off the collective sweat of the albiceleste and celebration beer off them. He throws them onto one of the freshly made beds, in particular Kun’s he notes, and grins at him. They look at each other like that, stupid grins cutting through the moment thick with awe and disbelief, and then Leo’s hand is curling into the back of his neck and pulling him in.

He feels overcome with a different kind of madness, where the enormity of what they have achieved for the briefest of seconds allows him to feel everything all at once; every up and every down, every moment of loss and euphoria they have weathered together right there at the seams of his lips that Leo is drinking in. 

And still it overflows, desire wrapping around them, contentment within the warmth of Leo’s arms as they tumble backwards and onto the bed Leo caging him in.

Cariño

Leo whispers softly above him and it feels like coming full circle, looking up at Leo and having the intensity of that gaze trained on him, hearing the word for the first time said with a tinge of something shifting between them and those beginnings stretching out now to this moment, Leo’s hand sure on his hips, his face full of wrinkles they drew together.

Kun pulls Leo down to himself with a boldness he had to fake all those years ago, now filled with a desperation that almost rivals the quiet longing for Leo that had overflowed in the ecstasy of being young and swimming in a sea of possibility, of winning the Olympics together. Leo’s body sets him ablaze now as it did when he was shy and awkward but no less determined, kissing Kun with furrowed eyebrows and a blossoming devotion that had charmed him so thoroughly.

Leo pulls away from him slowly, rather regretfully, his body feels like it’s being peeled away from Kun’s like the opposing poles of magnets. Leo had pulled away from him then too, both of them hard and a desire crackling between them that could only be tempered by the desire to do this right. So they had stayed awake that night cuddled together, the axes of possibility running as strong between them as it did for their futures.

But today Leo has responsibilities, egos to juggle and reporters to satisfy and they could afford themselves this stolen moment together only because they had to, only because it felt like he was slowly buzzing out of his own body and could feel the same happen to Leo. Leo places a soft peck on Kun’s lips on his way out, the anticipation of later already building. Kun feels a bone deep satisfaction at watching him go. He feels again like that boy giddy in Leo’s embrace. He lets that boy see him as he is today with his graying beard and treacherous heart and feels that, perhaps, he did good by him.

[a-lonely-dunedain]

Will you tell me about Ethedis and Corunir? Like when they first met/early parts of their acquaintance? Several people have some AUs where their PCs help him cross the Rammas Deluon to meet up with other Rangers, do you have anything like that? Any thoughts on what they do together post-canon?

my blorbos! of course I will :3

I think I touched briefly on this in another ask, but they meet in pretty much the same way it takes place in the epic line. only difference being that in the initial quests where you're investigating the watching stones Corunir goes with Ethedis on those errands instead of just staying back in Aughaire. he's had enough of waiting around and wants to help in any way he can, even if he can't get close to the lesser stones (and as capable as this elf seems in matters of lore, her survival instinct clearly leaves a lot to be desired. by a ranger's standard, at least). besides, even if he didn't want to go Ethedis probably would have dragged him along anyway lol (insisting he stay further away than necessary from the lesser stones of course). I mean, clearly her new friend is Not Doing So Great emotionally, so what better way to cheer him up than a buddy road trip across Fasach-larran? literally anything else? shhh she's trying her best ok

anyhow, so they fight some Duvárdain and wargs, have some bonding moments, Ethedis' infectious smile achieves the impressive feat of actually improving Corunir's mood somewhat, the start of a beautiful friendship, ect ect...

so as far as getting Corunir across Rammas Deluon goes, I always figured Ethedis would damage the stone heart of one of the Watching Stones allowing Corunir a path through.

y'know the light of the rising dawn skill LMs get? that's kinda like a concentrated laser beam of pure sunlight? I betcha firing a big one of those would damage the dark stone heart alright! of course firing a massive sun laser like that was extremely taxing on Ethedis, and not something she had ever really tried to do at that scale before. she learned the hard way she probably shouldn't try to do it again, lest she burn up from the inside out Fëanor Style™. (ok her spirit isn't *that* powerful or anything, it's just that her body isn't strong enough to channel that much power at once or something. Idk how I want to say LM skills work exactly. am I making any sense? probably not! I just can't have Ethedis firing off laser beams all willy-nilly like she does in game so I gotta put some heavy limitations on it. having it almost kill her seems reasonable! I'm so nice to my character 😊)

Ethedis is still standing but shakier than she expected to be, doing that left her physically hurt in some invisible way, as if it burned her on the inside. she's hiding it well enough for the moment however. it's still not going to be easy to pass Rammas Deluon, for Corunir especially, between the lingering malice of the now lifeless stone and his dark memories of this place the bones of his kinsmen lying before him it still takes all the strength he has left not to bolt in terror. honestly he didn't even expect to make it this far, but he's not alone this time. Ethedis keeps her hand on Corunir's shoulder as they walk through, partially to reassure him, partially to keep herself from falling over.

Now the thing about the watching stones is that it could very well be possible to repair them by simply replacing the damaged heart, and once the Iron Crown realizes that one of the stones has been rendered useless and there's a gap in their most effective line of defense, they're not going to waste any time in filling it back in. Corunir realized this as soon as Ethedis proposed her crazy plan to him, and when she murmurs something along the lines of "I will not I'll be able to do that again..." after blasting the stone heart, he realizes that passing the Rammas will probably be a one-way trip for him (it won't be of course, he'll eventually gain the strength to challenge the stones himself, but at this moment he doesn't see that as a possibility). you'd think that knowledge would make crossing the valley that much harder for him, but surprisingly it's the least of his worries right now. after all, when he agreed to come to Angmar in the first place he knew there was a high chance he wouldn't make it back, they all knew and accepted it. there was a reason no one ever came looking for them. no no, what he was worried about was trying to keep his eyes up and focusing on the horizon. something in the back of his mind was screaming that if he looks anywhere else, to where the bones lay still, he too will join them that's where you belong, isn't it? where you abandoned them? a squeeze of Ethedis' hand on his shoulder breaks him out of his dark reverie, as if she could sense his spirit beginning to falter.

hey wait I was just trying to write a summary here! how'd this turn into an actual attempt at writing? since when do I do that?? false advertising.

anyway yes, they do make it to the other side! exhausted and not unscathed, but they make it. Ethedis finally collapses from the physical strain of the aforementioned laser blast, giving Corunir quite a fright, as for a moment he thinks the stones somehow Got Her. luckily she's still conscious and can assure him that she's ok(-ish) and that destroying the stone heart just took a greater toll on her than she expected. once Corunir carries her a safer distance away from the valley and uses some of his fancy Loremaster Healing Skills™ to help her recover (did I mention I headcannon Corunir as a guardian/loremaster multiclass? lore-guardian? guard-master? idk) they're able to make it the rest of the way to Gabilshathûr and continue the epic line from there.

oh gosh, as for post cannon I haven't really thought all that much about it mostly because thinking too far into Ethedis' future includes Corunir's eventual death. GOSH DANG IT WHY DID I HAVE TO MAKE HER AN ELF ;-; however I did toy around with the idea that they would spend a not-insignificant amount of time in the rebuilt Annuminas (mostly because Evendim was always my favorite region in the game). but even then I don't really see them settling down anywhere. I mean, you know how rangers are, they don't like to stay in one place for too long and Corunir has had enough waiting around to last him a lifetime. and Ethedis is, well, Ethedis. a young elf filled with wanderlust. and with the end of the War of the Ring and the world finally becoming safer, her desire to see ALL of it has increased tenfold. so I'd imagine they're going to spend a long time just traveling around, revisiting old places they didn't get the chance to properly explore (Ethedis is absolutely going to take him on a tour of Rohan. it was so cool and he hardly got to see any of it!). oh yeah and routing out any pockets of Sauron's old lackeys they happen across. that's also important.

ok I got super ramble-y here but I'm hoping that's what you were asking for lol. if even half the things I wrote here made sense I will consider this a victory

[theexecutionerstoolkit]

The Bed You Lie In

So the bed you lie in. the one you made. The one you will sleep in tonight. The on and on of it. The loop, the repeat. What you do for maybe 8 hours everyday. It’s a big part of the day, of your life, of you. How you sleep. 

Bad bed? Bad sleep. Bad bed? Bad back. Bad sleep? Bad back? Bad  day. A vicious cycle of sleep and decay.  

I know that with a good amount of sleep I function much better. I’m less inclined to be grumpy or weepy, those two ugly dwarves. Plus with a good sleep I occasionally get to be almost happy. That’s another dwarf there. All my dwarf emotions. Facets of the ego.  How does Snow White, that known associate of dwarves feature? I’m not sure.

The point though is that without a good sleep I am not the best of dwarves. (I might have taken that too far). Without an adequate amount of lying down I am not my best self. And when awake I’m not able to reach any form of mythical optimum. So there it is, a good bed is one of the best things you can do for your day.

Most of the rest of the time I’m at work and that means sitting down. In my chair at my desk. I sit most of the day. Hunched over and trying to make sense of the ordinary and extraordinary information that is present on that tiny screen. I see nothing else and I notice nothing else. My eyes are thus engaged and the rest of my senses and body are fairly disconnected. There's coffee and a bit of lunch but not very much else. Just like the bed the wrong chair is going to turn sitting into a health hazard. Sitting and as a result work becomes even worse for your health. Any pain and my mental health deteriorates. So it’s important to get the sitting right too. It’s eight hours of the same after all. And that’s us. Sleeping and sitting.

What else do I do everyday that maybe I could do better?

Lounging.

After work I need to relax. Which is a bit more sitting or lying on the sofa. It’s a great piece of furniture, the sofa, because with this equipment you can do either or both at the same time. I do that a lot! In the evening after a night and a day of the deliberate practice of the two halves, sitting and lying, comes the lounging. If there wasn’t so much competition I could lounge for England.  But it’s  a national pastime. The road is long and the competition fierce. Everyone's trying to get there. It's something many of us can only achieve in our senior years. Just before that much longer lie-down.

The problem with all of this not moving is that slowly over time, the months and the years, poor health begins to creep in. The spectre of sickness and death begin to loom. My life's work of lounging will be cut short before I reach perfection. No MBE for me.

 I’ve got to add a bit of moving around into my day otherwise the basic muscles I need for a decent lounge are just not going to be strong enough. And as I said for most of us illness and poor health are a slow encroachment that stillness only allows to get closer. You have to move to keep ahead. The easiest way to do this is something called walking. I know it’s damn time consuming so if you want to get away with doing less I’d suggest running. Apparently this hideous form of exercise is efficient and means you can finish your walk that much faster. Plus you get further away from poor health and sickness. Think about it. Of course you might run into them coming the other way round. So running, for me, is too risky.

Recently I read this tale of a man who died in his 90’s who drank, smoked and ate exactly what he wanted. Those stories abound and I’m sure you have heard them too. In fact you might even know someone who has lived life like that. My aunt is a great example. She’s in her 90’s and until recently ate and drank as she pleased. The secret, apparently for both this man and my aunt, was in movement. Neither of them had cars and both of them walked to wherever they were going as much as possible. Block after block everyday. Miles and miles. And it worked. So walking, there may be something in it after all. It might be a secret to successful lounging. It does sound challenging though.

Therefore shoes are on the list.

Of course there are those other things, Healthy eating, mental stimulation, socialising etc but those are for professionals.

If you want to fix, improve, optimise your life, focus on the bed, the chair, the shoes. Get these right and you have a distinct advantage over everyone who doesn't..

I know it’s not the bed, the chair, or the shoes. It's sleeping, sitting, and walking.

If you are not sleeping, or lounging, then mainly you are about your work. It’s like the bed you lie in, it’s something you do for most of your life.

So maybe that's something to think about too?

Dream jobs, true callings.

If investing in a good bed seems to be sensible? And investing in a good chair seems like a good idea? Then maybe investing some time in good work might be equally sensible?

I’m not proposing you need to find your dream job. Or that you need to find your passion. True callings, that’s not me.

I won't wait. I don’t want to choose or be chosen. I’d rather not leave my fate and happiness to the obscure and ultimate, to external agents. That includes work. I won't leave things to the off chance that there is one true job.

Instead if I can take control of how I work then happiness and progress must follow. That may not be the progress of career heaven or an escape from drudgery. So, yes, there's a  sort of Zen here. Chop wood, carry water. But it does make the challenge much easier, finding what satisfies and stimulates in what I’m doing in the here and now.

And with work, when you can improve the commitment and effort you bring to the job then the job improves around you. And so does the quality of your lounging. Less residual stress, better satisfaction. Realisation.

[phae-undergrove]

Hey there friend! I saw you're offering readings and just wanted to see if the cards have any advice about whether or not I should move in with my brother and his gf? If thats not an appropriate question please let me know!

Hey there! Thank you so much for submitting and remaining patient as I get to your ask! 💖😇 for your question I asked the cards if they had any general advice or things to say about moving in. For this I pulled The World upright this is one of my FAVOURITE cards in the tarot. The imagery is so deep and meaningful and I just really resonate with it 😂 anyway to help you get a better idea of what you’re seeing I like to describe the card and explain the imagery first before we really dive into the meaning!

The World card shows a naked woman wrapped in a purple cloth, dancing inside a large laurel wreath. She looks behind her to the past, while her body moves forward to the future. In her hands are two wands or “batons”, (like the one The Magician holds) It is a symbol that what was manifested with The Magician has now come to completion with The World. The wreath is circular, symbolizing the continual cycle of successful completion and new beginnings because, as this woman steps through the wreath, she is completing one phase but beginning another one almost straight away.

Now, apart from the woman and the wreath there are four figures (a lion, bull, cherub and eagle), similar to those in the Wheel of Fortune. Both The World and the Wheel of Fortune speak to the cyclical nature of your life and YOUR progression through its cycles. The four figures represent the four fixed signs of the Zodiac—Leo, Taurus, Aquarius, and Scorpio. They are symbolic of the four elements, the four suits of Tarot, four compass points, four seasons, and the four corners of the Universe. They are here to guide you from one phase to the next, bringing a true sense of balance and harmony through your journey.

As for the meaning the world card has a few. More often than not The World invites you to reflect on your past journey, honor your achievements, and tune into your spiritual lessons. Celebrate your successes and bask in the joy of having brought your goals into reality. All the triumphs and tribulations along your path have made you into the strong, wise, more experienced person you are now. That will serve you well on the next part of your journey! As they say “hindsight is foresight”. Now is a time to express gratitude for what you have created and harvested. Finally, make sure you don’t rush into the next big project; celebrating your journey will set you up for success when you are ready for your next challenge.

If you are feeling that you have not quite reached this point of “completion” The World card is saying that you are very close! You may still need an added level of understanding to graduate to a higher level and enjoy real success. Look back at your past experiences and acknowledge how far you have come and what you learned along the way. It may surprise you to look back at your progress and see how much you achieved. This reflection may also be what you need to bring your project to its final stages. If you’re finding that you feel some loose ends may still remain, The World asks you to bring THEM to completion. In doing so, you will clear the space for new beginnings and opportunities to emerge. Letting go of old things that no longer serve you allows your hands to grab new things that will serve you well.

I hope this answered some of your questions! And I hope you enjoyed the reading! Again thank you for remaining so patient! 💖

Merry meet! B(Phae)

[lilitophidian]

Little things about my Lilith before I proceed with my carrd stuff later today!

If more information comes out later (especially when season two rolls around) or I switch things up, these will be updated.

☆ Lilith has everyone under her control/manipulation because she wants that sense of dominance and has a personal vendetta against being under someone's thumb given the whole Eden thing. She wants to be the main bitch in charge and completely despises God.

☆ When Eve didn't rebel against what was going on by herself, Lilith was angry with her, finding her pathetic, but she didn't express her true feelings due to her strong composure.

☆ It was Lilith's idea to corrupt Eve. Lucifer was already fragile after what happened to him, so he went along with Lilith's idea. Lucifer saw her as the only entity truly on his side.

☆ She doesn't care about Hell and is angry that she was forced to go there with Lucifer. Although she has some feelings for Lucifer, she views their marriage more as a means to an end in achieving her revenge rather than a genuine loving relationship.

☆ Those seven years both she and Alastor were gone, she tortured him most of the time, if not the whole time. He's a pet to her.

☆ Alastor is under her contract to watch over Charlie, It's like a marionette situation where she's planted a seed in her daughter--in a way to help her with her wrathful plot for revenge against Heaven. This is why she took Charlie away from Lucifer so that he wouldn't be able to convince her not to do such since he failed.

☆ She wants things to proceed at a slow pace so that everything works out in her favor without raising any suspicion. Alastor is likely aware of the whole plan, but he is not allowed to reveal anything. He is the only one who knows Lilith's true nature behind the facade she puts up.

☆ Lilith contracted Alastor because of how fast he was moving up the ladder and taking out the other overlords, and she respects POWER she loves it.

☆ Lilith is a succubus with the lure of a siren. Her powers involve song/sound manipulation, which can hypnotize like a snake charmer.

☆ She seems to be self-absorbed and thinks that hurting people is necessary to achieve her goals. Due to this belief, she manipulated Adam and Lute to a great extent, and she will keep doing so until she obtains everything she feels entitled to.

☆ I have a theory that Lilith may have played a role in the angel exterminations by manipulating them against each other. She wanted to incite a revolution without getting her own hands dirty. This is why Alastor shows up as soon as Charlie opens the hotel, Lilith wanted to see where everything would go.

☆ While sadistic and a bit apathetic, she is extremely possessive and doesn't like it when people mess with her toys. Even if she lacks care if they die or not.

☆ My Lilith actually can change anything on her body. As a human, and on occasion, you will find her with medium auburn hair as it was her natural coloring. Her horns grow depending on her mood/emotions.

☆ When Lilith fell with Lucifer, she ended up having two burn scars on her back in the shape of her sigil, mirroring each other as one is upside down and the other is right side up. Aka, ( ⚸ ) This is the only thing she's not able to change on her body with her powers.

[thethoguhts]

A lot of people try to change their mindset before making physical changes, but I usually find it works better the other way

Regular sleeping cycle

I have found out that unfortunately my body is very very sleep dependant. That is, not getting adequate sleep has more impact on my mood, energy, appearance etc. than any other change, which is why it’s at the top. Inadequate sleep can actually make me feel hungover the next day which is why it’s important to stay on top of. I have found that if I go to sleep between 10 and 10.30, I wake up naturally before my alarm at 6.30am and I have no desire to fall back to sleep — this sets the tone for my day with a focused, energetic and interpersonal demeanour. However, if i fall asleep by 11.30 I wake up in a haze, red eyed and still tired. The difference that extra hour or even half hour will make is so under rated — respect your body’s Circadian Rhythm and it will respect you. I found alot of amazing info in a book called Why We Sleep by Mathew Walker.

Foods you are avoiding to eat

Alot of people advise on what you should eat which is obviously important, but for me, maintaining a strong energy throughout the day is also down to steering clear of certain foods. I’m talking about refined carbohydrates such as bread, pasta and of course sugar. When I eat these foods it’s almost certain I’ll crash due to their high glycemic qualities and will not fully recover for the rest of the day, where I will remain somewhat introverted and tired. Not eating these foods also does not bloat your stomach and will have you looking slimmer. For lunch I stick to cooked veg and fish/meat. Further, I don’t ‘intermittently fast’ per se, but I do give my body a food-free window in the morning for 2–3 hours which allows all your regulatory hormones to secrete and settle without the added stress of ingesting and absorbing food. Jordan Peterson claims his first recommendation to patients is eating a fat-heavy breakfast in the morning to mop up excess insulin, as opposed to carb-heavy which increases blood sugar.

Eating the right foods.

As you may be aware there has been alot of exciting research around the human microbiome and our symbiotic relationship with bacteria. If you’re not aware I would suggest you start with a book called ‘The Diet Myth’, which explains not only what you should eat but also why. The long and short of it is you should eat the widest range of natural foods possible for your body (veg, cheese, nuts, oils) so as to cultivate a broad range of microbial species in your stomach — the broader the better! There is a proven theory that your brain communicates alot with your stomach through the Vegus Nerve and can strongly influence mood (as well as auto immune conidtions). In addition, clean foods give you so much more energy and make you look so much better.

Cutting out masturbation

This was my biggest vice — It was quite literally an addiction like cigarettes or coffee but I had no idea it was an issue because, it’s just wanking right? Wrong. The reason it becomes addictive is because it stimulates the same neurological receptors that are responsible for your sense of reward and achievement. When you’re bashing your bishop even once a day you are exploiting your brain’s reward circuitry and tiring it out. Once it’s exhausted, every day things that would give you a sense of pleasure or drive are no longer effective because the receptors have already been over-loaded from last night’s internet indulgence. I could go on about this for days but you can do your own research easily on the web. For me, the results of just abstaining for even a few days were incredible.

Haircut

Never underestimate the power of a clean fade bro (or if you’re a woman just a professional clean and blow dry I guess?)

1.1 Now you can focus on mindset! I didn’t realise how important meditation was until i actually tried to still my mind and couldn’t. Months on, I’m still shit at it but getting better. What you have to remember is meditation/mindfulness is singularity of the mind even when consciously active. Washing the dishes? Focus on it. Driving? Focus on it. Eating a sandwich? Focus on it. I also find that affirmations help, resonating with the galactic frequencies to see yourself where you want to be and acting on it.

1.2 Having a goal You need this, this sense of purpose and identity. You will surely wither away and rot inside without it. It can be anything — job, your kids, working out, hobby, passion. Find what makes you drive and dig!

I’m not saying I stick to these steps religiously, sometimes I fall right off the band wagon — but when I know its time to pick myself up, these are the areas I work on. Collectively they make me more extroverted, clearer headed, give me more conviction and far more efficient.

Hope it helps, good luck!

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[ash-2-ash]

Another dnd character backstory cause why not? I feel like the inspiration for this character is pretty obvious if you’ve seen Once Upon a Time lol. So this is Mr. Silver (he/him) a level 5 warlock with a fiend patron.

(1033 words)

Mister Silver was once human with a wife and child. His memories of this time are not incredibly clear, but they are there. He remembers the arguments with his wife, who he didn’t have the best relationship with, but cared for nonetheless. He also remembers spending his days toiling away at work, but can’t quite remember what it is that he did. His clearest memories, though, are those of his daughter, Ana. Her smile could brighten any room, her laughter cure any sorrow, and her presence relieved any fatigue from working all day. Any time he sits and relives these memories, however, they always end the same way. The soldiers come, demanding any able bodies join the war efforts. The pain of his injured leg. The panic, the fires, the screams.

His next memories are far worse. A terrible, grating voice sounds in his head, whispering wonderfully terrible things. It promises to give him all the power in the world - enough to get back his family, even. The voice tells him that if he wants this power, all he need do is find the Crocodile… Silver blinks and looks down to find that he’s covered in blood. He feels strong now, powerful enough to take on armies. And his leg is… healed? He can walk normally, although after years of living with this injury, he’s much more used to the movements of a limp than a normal gait - best keep the cane, then. Immediately after having that thought, the voice returns. “You’ve achieved the power I asked you to. Now for my end of the deal: the ability to use it.” Suddenly a new wave of thoughts and knowledge flooded his brain. Spells, histories, rituals, and how to use all of this knowledge to his advantage.

From this point, he set out, searching tirelessly to find his wife and daughter. An interesting discovery he made is that whether the result of his new abilities or the deal he made, he didn’t need sleep like he once did. He could sleep and very well would if needed, but it was now far from a nightly event. Occasionally, he would also have thoughts that weren’t quite his own. They were subtle at first, but became louder and louder until he couldn't drown them out anymore. By this point he had been alive more than a century and a half - far longer than any human lifespan - and he hadn’t aged even a day. He had to make peace with the fact that he could no longer truly call himself human, but he did continue to fight the darkness gathering at the edges of his mind — darkness that threatened to consume him the moment he let down his guard.

By the time he was around two centuries old, he realized that there was no possible way he could see either his wife or daughter again. Stricken with grief, he allows the darkness not to consume him, but to join with him, forever changing him. His eyes became an unnatural color, his skin took on an almost scaly appearance, and his nails grew longer and darker as he finally gave up the last of his sense of humanity.

From here, Silver traveled aimlessly, making deals wherever he went. Because of his appearance and cold, calculated nature, he was given the moniker “Crocodile,” which felt eerily familiar. Eventually, he came across a small, isolated territory on the brink of ruin. The lord of the area asked Silver for help caring for his people as he was passing through. The lord agreed to give the Crocodile whatever he wanted in return, and was surprised when all that was asked was that he hand over his castle. The lord eagerly agreed to these terms, but was shocked and appalled when upon making contact with the Crocodile’s outstretched hand, all of the people in his territory were transported into the castle before they turned into household items and moved as if by magick into their proper places. The lord was exiled from his own castle, haunted by the knowledge that he had condemned his people until the day that he died.

Silver remained in the castle for many years afterward. The surrounding farmlands and villages quickly fell to ruin, while the castle, through the magick and upkeep of Mr Silver, remained immaculate. Here, Silver kept himself locked away for several decades, having grown bored of the outside world. He began to reflect on his past, his human years, and the deal he had made. The more he thought about what happened in the past, the more he felt slighted, tricked. He began to realize that the demon gave him knowledge and tricked him into power that would never allow him to rejoin his family. He was trapped in the mortal plain, and didn’t know when he’d get the ability to leave. He began researching both his patron and his curse, recalling that the demon had also called the one he stripped of the powers in the past “Crocodile.” Unfortunately, information on this subject was nearly impossible to find, so progress in gathering information was always slow.

Silver found himself alternating between venturing out, whether it be to make a deal and amuse himself with the subsequent chaos, or to gather new research materials. Of course with his research came the realization that if he continued down this path, he would die. Of course he wanted to be reunited with his lost family, but there was also a reason he injured his own leg to avoid going to war. He was utterly terrified of death, especially the judgment that awaited him. After all that he has done and all that he has lived through, how could he ever hope to have a peaceful afterlife?

After several centuries spent either in isolation, or traveling to see how the world has changed, he is called out again by the messenger of a baron. Apparently, he has called a band of adventurers to take down a witch who laid a curse on his now barren wife, and is willing to make a deal in exchange for the witch’s head. And what’s this…? A witcher? How interesting…