#and then lessing joining in just to Observe

[sorrowsofsilence]

intimate silence I • n.s

pairing: Noah Sebastian x fem!reader

words: 7.8k - part 1/2 - read part two here

warnings: (general warnings for part 1 and 2) 18+, angsty shiz, (years of unsaid feelings), smut, making out, fem!receiving, male!receiving, p n v, creampie, mentions of drinking, friends to lovers

prompt: After seeing each other for the first time in years, all the old feelings you tried to bury come flooding back. Noah admits he regrets not choosing you, especially when he’d felt the same way all along. Perhaps years of intimate silence weren’t the end… just the prelude to everything you were always meant to be. (This is like* a part 2 of desolate love - same vibes and storyline-ish.)

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THIS IS A FANFIC ABOUT REAL PEOPLE IN FICTIONAL SCENARIOS. I AM NOT IMPLYING THIS IS HOW THESE PEOPLE ARE IRL OR THAT THIS SITUATION WOULD HAPPEN. IT IS FOR FANFIC PURPOSES ONLY!

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You hadn’t anticipated him being at the pub as you walked in. It had been years since you last saw him, and surely many more since he last thought of you.

Yet, when you followed the server to your designated booth, only to pass his- his gaze latched onto yours. Your lips parted with recognition, heart immediately racing when his smile made way to his eyes.

It was hard to decide whether to stop amidst the bustling tables and scattered voices in the restaurant; but when he reached out his hand to touch your arm, hesitating for a mere moment before turning it into a subtle wave- you stopped.

"Noah?" you breathed his name as he took in your face with his dark eyes, unsure whether he was searching or reminiscing over past memories. You glanced at the others at his table, offering a brief nod before looking back at him shyly. He chuckled softly, disbelief colouring his expression, as he leaned his elbow on the chair's headrest.

"Date night?" he asked, his gaze shifting to the man behind you, prompting an awkward cough as you stepped aside, letting your friend join in. Shaking your head while exchanging a glance with the hostess at your booth, you laughed nervously and looked away from Noah.

"No-just drinks with friends." Your mind spiraled with the accusation, and the hint of something lingering within his words tugged at your throat.

The brunette noticed you fidgeting with your sweater sleeve and nodded, "Well, it's nice to see you. It's been a long time."

Meeting his stare, you offered a stiff yet warm smile, "Yeah, it has."

You glanced at the hostess again, apologetically raising your hand before heading toward your booth, leaving behind the tangled threads of old emotions. "I—I shouldn't keep her waiting. Nice seeing you, too."

As you walked away, there was an unspoken sentiment that seemed to surge between you two. You felt Noah's gaze linger on your retreating form, and despite the peculiar stirring of forgotten feelings, you were gently cocooned back into the familiarity of your friends’ laughter as you slid into the worn leather of the booth.

You tried to shake off the flush of surprise that still heated your cheeks, and across from you, your friend observed the disarray with a curious gaze, his brows furrowing as he leaned in.

"You okay?" he asked, dropping his voice so the clamor of the pub's crowd swallowed his words.

You met his eyes and nodded stiffly. "Yes, just... haven't seen him in a long time."

"I can see that," your friend responded, his gaze flicking momentarily in the direction you had come from, then returning to you with a ghost of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. It was a gentle tease, immediately soothing away the tension that knotted your heart.

Across the room, a new round of drinks arrived at Noah’s table, followed by a chorus of laughter. Glancing over, you watched as he lifted his glass in a toast, his gaze straying once again towards your booth. The soft glow from the pub lights made his features appear less harsh than you remembered, shaping half-forgotten memories into something akin to nostalgia.

"Old flame?" Your friend's words snapped you back from your thoughts. There was a taunting lightness in his tone that said he guessed more than what he dared to ask outright.

"Something like that," you admitted, idly toying with the flimsy drink coaster before you.

"He never really left your thoughts, did he?" His words tinged with curiosity.

Your face warmed at his comment, subconsciously glancing over at Noah once more as if to confirm something you hadn't voiced out loud in years.

"Not really," You confessed, heart clenching as you sucked in a breath- something that felt harder to do now that Noah kept flicking his eyes back to your table.

You were grateful when the waiter arrived with your drinks; a timely distraction. But as jokes flitted across your table and ice clinked in your cocktail, a shadow of melancholy slipped into your chest.

Your friend's voice cut through the low hum of pub conversations, contrasting the bought of laughter from Noah’s table. “Did you ever date?” He asked nonchalantly.

You gave him a curt shake of your head, savoring the tartness of your drink. “No," you replied, with a rueful smile.

"But you wanted to?"

His question was more a statement and you could only nod, the sudden knot in your throat making words impossible. He watched you in silence, allowing you a moment to regain your composure.

"He didn’t choose me," you finally managed, swirling your drink in your glass. "He liked someone else at the same time. Things were complicated.”

Your eyes scanned the pub's old wooden ceiling, following a vague pattern in its grooves as if it held answers. Suddenly feeling Noah’s gaze on you again, the tight fluttering in your chest resurfaced.

"Does it still feel complicated?" Your friend asked gently.

"Uh…No..." The lie came out hollow even to your ears, and the man across from you rolled his eyes.

"You're a terrible liar," he reproached lightly, reaching across the table to pat your hand, causing you to sigh.

"He is part of my past," you reasoned out loud, more for yourself than to convince your friend. “I moved on to date Erin, until well… you know…and as far as I know Noah is still with his girlfriend of three years.” The words fell heavy against the illuminating candlelight flickering in between the two of you.

"You don't hate him though?" He asked. A question you knew wasn't really a question.

"Hate him?" you shook your head as you scoffed, almost bitterly. “I tried to.”

Your fingers traced the outline of the coaster as you continued, "But hating him would have meant to forget all the good times- remove all the annoying memories of him that still seem to live in my mind. And...I didn’t want to do that. I don’t want to do that." you confessed, fighting the lump forming in your throat. "I'd rather remember and hurt than forget and feel hatred."

There was a pause as your friend digested your words, looking at you as if he were seeing a different side of you, one he never knew existed.

"But doesn't it just hurt," he began carefully, “to keep remembering?”

A soft sigh escaped your lips as you watched the bubbles gently float to the top of your glass. "Sometimes," you admitted, turning your gaze back to Noah. His laughter echoed across the room, drowning out the music momentarily. A smile tugged at your lips unknowingly.

"Then why keep doing it?" he questioned further.

It was when Noah made another loud joke to his friends that he turned once again, meeting your eyes for what felt like the hundredth time that night- that you caved.

“Because the way he has looked at me never changed. Not through relationships, not through time apart- never. There is always that same annoying and infuriating look of hope.”

"Hope?" Your friend repeated, tilting his head as he wrapped his hand around his glass, fingers tapping lightly against the surface.

You nodded, stealing another glance at Noah. He was leaned back in his chair now, a relaxed smile on his face that countered your turmoil, unravelling you with every gaze he cast your way.

"It's the kind of hope that asks 'what if'," you explained, voice low and barely audible over the commotion of the pub around you. "What if things were different? What if we had chosen each other? Like an opportunity lost, but not entirely forgotten."

The man across from you was contemplative, taking a thoughtful sip of his drink before leaning in closer to you. "What does that look like? This hope you see in his eyes?"

You pondered over his question, swallowing thickly as you tried to form words that would make sense to him, let alone you.

“It’s like this lidded gaze- a soft shine of longing subdued by realism that has never entirely disappeared. It’s a look that says he still sees what he saw in me when we were just kids in high school- like I’m still important to him, in some way. It tells me he understands that even when it seemed like I moved on, he knows deep down that I really didn't. And neither did he. And it's not right. But it’s too late."

It was silent for a moment as you fought the water treading within your eyes, chugging the rest of your drink as a distraction.

"That's a lot to collect from a look," he said eventually, observing your flustered expression with raised brows.

"I’ve had a long time to think about it," you conceded with a shrug, ripping the edge of your coaster absently. But inside your chest, your heart beat a frantic rhythm that suggested it agreed with your words.

Your friend glanced towards your unease, watching how Noah pretended he was never really looking over at your table. "And if he weren't in a relationship now? If circumstances were… different?"

Your reply, when it came, was barely above a whisper. "Doesn’t matter," you lied, heart pounding against your ribs as the truth nudged at your denial.

"Even if things were different… he never chose me. Refused to. Told me he promised someone else his heart after high school."

"And you still hold it against him?" The question hung heavy in the air, though your friend's tone was light, almost indifferent.

"No," You denied, feeling a twinge of pain claw at your chest. "I suppose... I have come to terms with it. Maybe he wasn’t supposed to choose me. He never had that high school girl anyway, either. She moved on before him."

"But you haven't moved on." The words slipped from your friend’s lips as an affirmation. His gaze wandered back to Noah, where another round of laughter punctuated the air.

You stared at your empty glass, chewing on your lower lip as the silence festered. For a moment you considered denying it, but what use was there in pretending when the truth was palpable in every word?

"No," you sighed, looking back at Noah. "I guess not. Not really."

Your friend nodded understandingly, tossing back the remaining contents of his glass before placing it back onto the table.

“Well,” he started, and you turned to look at him as he refilled his drink from a bottle that had been ignored until now. “In this life, we rarely get second chances with things that truly matter.”

It was then Noah stood up from his table, turning to cross the room. His stride was slow, confident, a stark contrast to the unease in your chest. His eyes were on you, and you pretended not to notice. Your friend did, though.

A sudden feeling of dread crushed your heart as you followed his frame out of the corner of your eyes, the shadows stretching out on the worn-out wooden floorboards.

"Why is he heading here?" you whispered, not daring to voice your suspicion too loudly, as if to break the bubble surrounding both of you.

Your friend merely shrugged, a sly grin replacing his earlier curiosity. "No idea. But I am eager to find out," he said, leaning back into his chair and taking a sip from his drink, all whilst watching Noah’s approaching figure as though it were an intriguing spectacle. As Noah got closer, your pulse quickened its pace, pounding rhythmically against your chest while your mind raced in frantic circles.

He smiled at you for a moment before nodding at your friend, flicking his short brunette strands out of his eyes.

“Uh hey, my friend’s are about to head out…” He said, throwing a thumb back to the crew that was now throwing him half amused glances and thumbs-ups. He glanced back at you, "and I'd really appreciate the opportunity to catch up. Would you mind if I joined you?"

Your friend looked at you, your widened eyes meeting his amused gaze before he shrugged and gestured to the vacant seat next to him, sliding further into the booth, “By all means,” he invited.

“Thanks.” Noah nodded gratefully, taking the seat beside your friend, and now sitting across from you.

“I hope I’m not intruding,” he added, glancing back and forth between the two of you.

“Not at all,” your friend assured him, though his eyebrows remained slightly arched.

You gripped your empty glass tighter in your hand, swallowing down the sudden dryness in your throat. “Yeah, Noah… it’s been forever,” you managed to croak out in what you hoped passed for casual indifference.

He flashed a quick smile at your words, his eyes crinkling around the edges. Beneath the guise of casual banter, the years that had passed were muffled whispers hidden in plain sight.

"Yes, it has been," Noah responded, while his gaze danced over you, "How’s life been treating you?"

You shrugged nonchalantly, trying to cloak your nervousness under feigned ease. "Oh you know, ups and downs. Mostly well."

A smile played on your friend's lips, a look of knowing graced his features as he stared at the exchange between you two.

"Same here," Noah replied, sipping from his glass.

A skillfully avoided conversation unfolded between you, where inquiries about work and general well-being served as shields against the veiled curiosity itching to break free.

Your chest clenched again, and as the waitress came over to give you another drink, you took the opportunity to head to the washroom.

Your friend watched you rise from the booth, catching your eye in a silent exchange that offered reassurance. Noah politely nodded as you slipped out of the booth and disappeared into the crowd.

Locking the door behind you, you took a moment to collect yourself, splashing water on your face in an attempt to steady your racing heart.

It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair how Noah just waltzed back into your life after all these years, bringing rainstorms of feelings you had worked so hard to forget- yet really didn’t.

In the reflection of the bathroom mirror, you saw a ghost of your younger self, the one who spent hours decoding Noah's glances and gestures. The one who would stay up late just to watch his favourite shows so you had something to talk about. The one who would wear his sweaters because he said they looked better on you. The one who obsessed over his lingering touch and flirty banter.

The one who was not good enough.

Overwhelm washed over you like cold water, stealing your breath. You pressed your palms onto the edge of the sink, clenching your jaw as you wrestled with the torrent of emotions that roared through your veins.

With a quiet sigh, you patted down your face with a rough paper towel and straightened your sweater. Ducking your head, you drew another deep breath.

This was just Noah. Just a boy from your past. Just Noah.

Slipping back into the booth, you offered them a small smile before turning towards Noah who seemed genuinely involved in the story your friend was narrating. The air was lighter now; there was an ease that settled around the table as rounds of laughter traveled between the three of you while your friend indulged Noah in stories about a mutual friend who had recently moved out of town. You took occasional sips from your drink, contributing where necessary while primarily focusing on observing the somewhat restrained interaction between Noah and your friend.

You welcomed the change in atmosphere. No sparks were flying around or deep murmurs floating in the air, nor heavy gazes locked onto each other. It was simple, casual – as mundane as any other night at the pub could have been.

Yet in the lulls of conversation, Noah's gaze met yours; keenly observant but surreptitiously so. There remained a certain intensity that made you uncomfortable and yet to evade it, felt unnatural. It was like there was an undercurrent running beneath his apparent nonchalance, manifesting as veiled glances and half-crafted jokes aimed to get that entrancing laugh from you.

“Guys, it’s been real, but I am gonna call it a night," your friend announced, a yawn stretching from his mouth.

"Already?" Noah questioned, sparing you a glance as though to silently ask whether you too were planning to leave.

"Got an early start tomorrow." Your friend assured, pushing himself out of the booth and giving a cheeky wink in your direction.

Your heart pounded in your chest as he left a void beside Noah, and a shiver of nervousness ran down your arms.

After bidding goodbye to him with an amused half-smile, Noah turned his attention back to you. His expression was unreadable, a cryptic mask that did nothing to ease your anxiety.

"Do you mind if I stay awhile longer?" He asked softly, his gaze meeting yours across the table.

You paused for a moment, finding your voice caught in the back of your throat. You could turn him away, tell him you'd rather be alone. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do that. You didn’t want him to go.

"No, not at all," you said, trying your best to sound as neutral as possible.

Noah shifted in his seat, leaning back with a distant look in his eyes before returning his gaze to you. His inked fingers drummed lightly against the wooden table top, suggesting a nervous energy beneath the seeming calm in his demeanor.

Shading his eyes with the back of his hand, Noah contemplated for a moment. “You know… life is strange sometimes,” he began haltingly and flashed a smile that never quite reached his eyes.

You quirked an eyebrow in question but did not interrupt, welcoming him to fill the silence that had fallen over the booth.

He let out a sigh, his fingers tracing the rim of his still fresh drink. "Sometimes," he started again, his october eyes fixing on yours, "we find ourselves living in a constant cycle of 'what ifs' and 'what could've beens'."

You swallowed hard as you tried to untangle his words. "And where has that cycle led you?"

Noah's gaze dropped from yours to his hands, "It led me here...sitting across from you after years, yet feeling as though I've never left." He let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head a little. "It's funny how life works."

You found yourself nodding, the corners of your mouth twitching at his admission. "Life has a strange sense of humor, doesn't it?"

"Indeed it does."

He took a sip of his drink, eyes twinkling under the dull bar lights. There was comfort in his silent observation; a mirroring dance between two people separated by years and experiences yet wound together by obscured ties.

"Can I ask you something?" Noah asked, his fingers idly drumming against the table's wooden surface.

Raising an eyebrow, you shrugged nonchalantly in response, not daring to trust your voice to betray the sudden discomfort stitching itself into your chest.

Taking your silence as approval, he leaned in, elbows resting on the table. A stray lock of hair fell onto his forehead as he leveled his gaze with yours. You took that moment to reminisce how long his hair used to be. Reminisce in the feeling of it tangled between your fingers when he asked you to play with it; or put it in a bun.

"Do you ever feel... like we missed out on something?" His voice was low, barely above a whisper, as if he feared someone might overhear the intimate nature of his question.

There was a moment's silence as you held his gaze, your heart hammering an erratic beat against your chest. Your mind raced to find a reply; a sentence that would adequately encase the pain, longing, and disappointment that had been the backdrop of your heart after Noah had been written out of it.

"Noah..." you breathed out, throat tightening.

"I mean," he hurriedly continued before you could voice any objection or sentiment, "it's just... Have you ever wondered how different our lives might've been if we..." He trailed off, seeming unsure of how to complete his tangled thought.

"...if I had chosen differently?" The last word of his sentence dissipated. His dark eyes were vulnerable, more than you remembered as they bore into yours.

"I..." You hesitated, stammering over your own words as an uncomfortable silence stretched between you two.

It was filled with unspoken regrets, unsaid words, and all those missed moments that formed a silent echo in your hearts.

"Yes," you finally admitted, sipping from your glass to wet your dry lips. "I have thought about it."

Noah let out a breath he seemed to have been holding, his shoulders dropping with the release of tension. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, and he looked down for a moment before meeting your gaze once more.

"But we can't rewrite the past, can we?" he said dryly, sipping from his glass.

"No, we can't," you agreed, your pulse dancing in your ears. You leaned back in the booth, turning your gaze away from Noah and towards the crowd of others around you. The music filled in the gap left by your silence.

"You know," Noah began again after a few moments, turning to face you fully, "I was happy to see you tonight."

"I'm...glad to know that," you replied uneasily.

He tugged at the collar of his shirt anxiously, taking in another breath. You watched as his fingers seemed to tremble, clawing at his tattooed neck. “I’ve missed you.”

You swallowed, nodding as you gave him a soft smile, “I’ve missed you too.”

And when it was silent again, neither of you could look at each other.

“So how’s Hannah?”

When you asked, his body stiffened momentarily before giving you a tight smile.

“We broke up a couple months ago,” He said, tilting his head to the side.

Your brows furrowed in an attempt to look sad; but the way your stomach began to spin in circles told a different story altogether.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, despite the fluttering inside you. “Hope things are better now.”

"Yeah," he gave a dismissive shrug of his shoulders. "Things happen. We're on good terms, so it’s alright."

Nodding, you waved the server over for another drink; this time asking for something stronger.

"Your turn," he gestured towards you with an encouraging smile. "How’s Erin?"

You didn’t miss the way your ex’s name sounded sour on Noah’s tongue.

"We broke up too," you admitted, finding solace as his reaction mirrored yours- surprise and awkwardness intermingled with a caring depth.

“I’m really shocked,” He said, blinking repeatedly before running his fingers through his hair, “You were together for eight years. Right since the end of high school.”

Nodding you chewed on the inside of your cheek,

"Yeah," you acknowledged, a ghost of a smile playing on your lips. "But things change, people change. I guess it just wasn't meant to be."

Noah was silent for a moment. It wasn't hard to see the shock in his eyes as he processed your words- after all, he had known Erin too.

"You... okay?" he asked softly, daring to meet your gaze again.

Nodding, you shrugged slightly, "Yeah. Took some time but yeah, I am."

Neither of you said anything further then; the server arrived with your drinks and the concentrated clinks against the mugs filled up the silence. You thanked her with an absentminded nod before she retreated back into the crowd.

“Want to get out of here?”

Noah's question hung in the air, and you blinked, taken aback.

"Where to?" you stuttered, your voice barely above a whisper.

He shrugged, the side of his lip twisting up in a lopsided smirk. "Somewhere quieter?"

You looked at him, heart thudding against your chest as you considered his offer. Whatever doubt resurfaced about this spontaneous venture was silenced by the surprising hope lighting up his eyes. The same, annoying, stubborn hope that seemed untouched by time. And perhaps it was enough to convince you to take that leap.

"Sure," you agreed reluctantly, avoiding eye contact as you slipped yourself out of the booth, placing some bills on the table next to your untouched drink.

The night felt different as you both stepped out of the pub and into the lightly lit streets. The breeze brushed past your face, carrying with it a scent of rain soon to come. Walking side by side, you could feel the palpable quiet weaving a comfortable cocoon around you.

"No regrets?" he murmured, hands slipped into his pockets as he glanced down at you.

"No regrets," you echoed, more to reassure your own trembling heart than to provide him with closure. He nodded, falling silent once more as your steps echoed against the cement streets.

“You never used to be this quiet,” Noah broke the silence, running a hand through his unkempt hair. “Couldn’t shut you up half the time.”

You laughed gently at that and glanced aside, “Well, life...” your voice trailed off, shrugging at your failed attempt at an explanation.

“I get it,” Noah hummed and nodded. He didn’t press for more; he never did, even back then.

A few paces ahead, Noah's car sat serenely below the dim glow of a streetlamp. As he unlocked the doors and you slid into the passenger seat your heart raced faster. It was just the two of you- after so long.

The soft hum of the car engine filled the small slice of your shared reality while Noah navigated through the late-night streets. Your eyes danced over the passing buildings and strangers walking, avoiding to look anywhere but at him.

Suddenly, he turned up the volume of the car's stereo, cutting through your contemplations. An old song wafted through the speakers, a whisper from years ago that wrapped around you both. The familiar melody made your heart twinge with nostalgia.

"Do you still like this song?" you said suddenly, blinking away unseen tears as you looked at the words slide across the small radio screen.

“I do,” He said softly, thumbs beginning to tap along to the melody.

A gentle smile pulled at your lips as the chorus began, your voice barely audible over the strumming of the guitar and drums. “We danced to it once. At that fundraiser thing.”

Noah glanced over at you, expression unreadable but the sparkle in his eyes betraying a mutual remembrance. "Yeah,” he murmured. “I remember.”

Memories began to float back, images flickering behind your damp eyes. That high school dance where you purposefully bought that floral pattern that made your skin pop- your eyeshadow contrasting the dark hues. Your hands were clammy as Noah approached you for a dance, saying it’s what ‘friends do’. You remembered the feeling of his fingers wrapped around your waist and back, delicately placed as if afraid you’d burn him- your hands resting behind his neck, while you two swayed.

I don’t believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now.

You’re my wonderwall.

The song faded out, replaced by another unfamiliar one whose words became background noise to your racing thoughts. Noah’s inked knuckles turned white on the steering wheel as a sigh slipped out from between his lips.

“Um, we're here," Noah finally broke the silence. The car came to a halt, the engine purring low before dying out completely. You blinked in surprise, trying to figure out where you were.

Looking around, you noticed that you were parked on top of a hill overlooking the city. You could see all the lights twinkling like stars; the night sky framed by the silhouette of towering skyscrapers and flowing ribbon of highway tracers in the distance.

"Well, this is quieter indeed," you mumbled, mostly to yourself. A chuckle escaped Noah as he reclined back into his seat.

"Yes," he murmured looking out through the window at the shimmering spectacle below. “Remember when I used to tell you how people always made out up here? And then you told me you didn’t know how to use tongue? And then I used to tease you?”

You blushed, a soft laugh escaping your lips at the memory. "How could I forget?" You shook your head slightly, feeling more loosened now. "You never let me live that down."

"True," Noah chuckled, a reminiscent glint in his eyes. "I believe you also made me swear that I would never make out with anyone up here because it was so cliche."

You rolled your eyes at him, a grin tugging at your lips. “Sounds like something I’d say.”

"Was Erin your first kiss then?" He gently nudged a question into the silence.

"Yeah" you confessed after a moment's pause. His gaze flickered to yours, curiosity mixed with surprise evident, “I didn’t want to kiss anyone unless I loved them.”

He nodded slowly, processing your words. "That's... admirable," he concluded with a soft smile.

"Is it?" you muttered, feeling the warmth rise on your cheeks as you laughed, ready to pester him, “Because apparently it was a joke I couldn’t kiss with tongue due to lack of experience.”

"No, no," Noah chuckled, leaning back against the headrest of his seat, staring out at the cityscape. "I only teased because you were somehow so sure that tongues were not involved at all."

You laughed, the twinkling lights reflecting in your eyes. "Well, how was I supposed to know!?" You mockingly defended yourself, playfully punching him in the arm.

He laughed heartily, his voice echoing within the confined space of the car. His laughter was a warm sound, a comfort from distant memories that wrapped itself around your heart. It was something you didn’t know you missed so much.

Once his laughter had subsided into a chuckle, he looked at you for a moment too long. The intensity of his gaze took your breath away. You could see hints of affection and longing there- an open invitation to walk down memory lane yet again.

"I was a jerk then. I bet you turned out to be an amazing kisser."

Your cheeks flushed a deeper shade of red at his words, and you found yourself turning away from his gaze, too flustered by the sudden compliment. He chuckled lightly, licking his lips briefly.

"Guess you'll never know," you retorted, burying your flaming face in your hands, “But no, not really.” you protested half-heartedly, looking out of the window to hide the warmth that was creeping up your neck.

"Still got that blush," he observed teasingly, causing your cheeks to burn even more fiercely.

"Shut up, Noah," you laughed it off, swatting at his arm. He raised his hands in a mock-surrender as another round of laughter echoed through the car. The space felt warmer, more familiar than what it had been just a few minutes ago.

The conversation lulled once again, filled with merely the hum of the cool evening breeze rustling the leaves outside and old tracks playing softly through the car's speakers.

"I used to come here after Hannah and I broke up... It helped me think."

The confession hung between you two, heavy and uncomfortable.

"Why are you telling me this?" You asked.

Noah was silent for a moment, the dim car light illuminating his face in an array of shadows.

"Because," he began slowly, "I think it's important for you to know. And it doesn't just remind me of her, it reminds me of what could have been- and what's no longer."

You nodded, swallowing down the lump in your throat as you turned your gaze to the cityscape below. It was beautiful, indeed.

Perhaps Noah had found solace in this beauty during his broken times.

Perhaps, right now, it was the sanctuary that you needed too.

"You never asked me why we broke up," Noah’s murmur brought you back from your thoughts.

"Why did you?" You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

His gaze shifted to meet yours, his chocolate eyes soft under the pale moonlight streaming into the car. "We fell out of love. Or maybe, I never even fully loved her."

For a moment, you were silent, digesting the harsh simplicity of his words.

"Love can be fleeting," you said softly, more to yourself than addressing Noah.

"No," he countered after a beat, "Love is constant. It's the people who are fleeting."

His sentiment hit a chord deep within you that resonated with your unspoken feelings.

"People change," you agreed, your fingertips brushing over the chill of your glass. "They grow...sometimes apart."

Noah hummed in response, his gaze distant as though lost in a maze of recollections. “Yes, we’ve changed, haven’t we?”

“Yes,” You mumbled, picking at the seam of your jeans.

“But I don’t think I ever stopped loving you. I didn’t even know at the time that I was in love.”

Your breath hitched in your throat at that moment, his words burning through your mind. Love. Loving you.

All that could be heard was the racing of your heart as your ears flooded with every panicked beat.

"You..." your voice faltered, unsure of how to respond. His gaze was relentless; not challenging you but pleading for understanding that you weren't quite sure how to give.

"Noah..." Your voice came out as a mere whisper, the name tumbling from your lips almost involuntarily, your mind still struggling to catch up with his declaration. He examined your expression in quiet apprehension, his hands clenched on his thighs.

"I mean it," he persisted, reaching over to gently cover your fidgety hand with his own larger one. His tattoos seemed even more prominent against your smooth skin - alive, just like the feelings that were coming alive in his presence. "Even though we’ve never been together... I don't know if I ever stopped thinking about you."

Your breath hitched as his words hung heavy in the air.

“I regret not choosing you. Every single day I’ve regretted fucking up the chance of us.”

Your heart raced in your chest, the thunderous pulse drowning out all other sounds. The feel of his warm hand on yours, the earnest look in his eyes- it was almost too much.

"Stop, Noah," you found yourself whispering, a plea more than a demand. His eyes flickered with hurt but he took his hand away nonetheless- an action that seemed to echo painfully around you.

He swallowed hard, leaning back against the car's seat while respectably creating distance. His gaze didn't leave yours, as if trying to convince you of the sincerity of his confession.

"I'm sorry," He apologized after what felt like eons, "I just... needed you to know."

“But you knew how I felt. All those years ago you fed into my feelings- when you knew. You knew I liked you- fuck, loved you. Which is pathetic because how do you know you love somebody you never even kissed, or hugged, or held hands with- at fifteen years old?” You sucked in a breath, tears welling in your eyes as you stared at your shoes but you blinked them away stubbornly. "But I knew. You knew.”

His hand twitched on the gear stick as though wanting to reach out to you once more, yet he restrained himself, a mask of remorse settling over his features.

"I didn’t know how to feel. I was confused. I thought I didn’t want to take the risk of losing you by dating you,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I thought my feelings would disappear…that they were just an infatuation.”

You nodded slowly, a storm of unsettled emotions making your voice tremble, "But they didn't." It was not a question; it was a confirmation. One that stripped away any ambiguity still lingering between you.

"No," he agreed with a shaky sigh, “Sometimes I wish they did.”

You laughed bitterly, sniffing, “I wish they did too. Because I just spent eight years in a relationship secretly wondering ‘what if Noah chose me instead’. ‘Why do I still love him’, ‘Why do I feel this way’.”

The words hung heavy, your confession giving more weight to the silence suffocating you both. Noah's eyes were wide, a mix of shock and something akin to longing etched into his features.

"I... I didn't know," he finally managed, choking out the words as if his regret was a tangible thing constricting his throat. "I always thought you were happy with Erin."

Your laugh echoed through the car, hollow. "And I thought you loved Hannah." you shot back, ignoring the sharp sting in your chest. Light spurts of rain began to fall outside, the dispersed patter of the drops landing on the car roof distracting.

He flinched visibly at your retort but made no attempt to defend himself. Instead, he dropped his gaze to his hands where they lay clenched in his lap.

"Life is ironic, isn't it?" he murmured after a while. His voice was quiet but resounding in the stillness of the moment.

"Yeah, it is." You agreed, gazing out of the window again.

The brunette beside you shifted in his seat again, taking in a slow breath. "I want to kiss you."

His words were so soft, they almost melded with the low murmur of the far away traffic.

Your wide eyes whipped to him in a glance that was all too revealing. A gasp escaped from your clenched jaws, an unexpected note in the heavy silence of his trembling confession.

"What?" Your voice strangled itself into a whisper, hands fluttering against your chest as if trying to stifle the mounting panic.

Meeting your gaze head-on, Noah cleared his throat, "If that's okay with you, I mean...I'm not..." he sighed, raking a hand through his tousled hair in frustration, "Nevermind."

A thousand thoughts and feelings flooded through you.

“I- I can’t go down this road again.”

At that moment he unbuckled his seatbelt, hastily crawling out of the car. Your breathing quickened as you watched him walk around the hood to your side, opening your door. He held out his hand, waiting for you to take it.

Shaking your head, you remained unmoving, the sudden rainfall outside creating a rhythmic backdrop to your racing pulse. His outstretched hand trembled slightly under the raindrops gently cascading down on them.

Stubbornly, he didn't retract it, "Please," Noah pleaded in a tone akin to a whisper.

An unknown force urged you to take his hand, pulling yourself out of the car and into the rain-soaked night. It was hammering down now; each drop was its own parade, a silver bead in the sea of dirt beneath your feet. Your clothes began to cling to your skin as the rain showered over you, yet you couldn’t tear your gaze away from Noah's.

Pulling you into a hug, he enveloped you fully in his chest.

His scent hit you first– a distinct mix of old spice and musk, something so uniquely Noah. His heartbeat echoed against your ears, beating in time with the thrumming of rain on the car roof.

You wrapped your arms around his torso, your fingers clutching at the fabric dampening underneath your grip. His body next to yours felt like a patchwork quilt of memories- a warmth that was familiar yet now foreign all at once.

He sighed gently above you, one hand moving to lightly stroke the small of your back. It was subtle, almost hesitant; as if he feared this moment to be just another figment of the past.

“I can’t change what happened- and I need you to know that I wouldn’t have changed it. Even if I regret it.”

“Why?” You asked.

"Because it made me realize how much I lost in not choosing you," he answered, his voice barely audible above the sound of the rain pounding against the pavement.

Your heart ached as his words rang in your ears, each syllable echoing with a pain you related to all too well.

“It made me realize how much I wanted you, and how it’s always been you. Maybe I wouldn’t have been a good partner for you because I was just a dumb kid. Maybe we were meant to experience other people before getting here- I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers.”

“But regretting it brought me back to you,” he finished, pulling you away from him as his hands reached up either side of your face, caressing your cheeks with his cold hands. His expression was raw and open, every hiding place stripped bare as he studied you.

"I need you to understand one thing," he continued, his voice barely a whisper against the pounding of your heart. "My feelings for you...they’re not fleeting."

The wind had picked up, tossing small flurries of rain sideways; droplets traced pathways down his inked skin, catching in the hollow of his throat. There was an otherworldly beauty about him in that moment, one that had you transfixed.

"You were always with Erin. What was I going to do, stroll up to your house and confess?" he broke the silence once again, his knuckles brushing stray strands of hair from your face.

His eyes bore into yours, an unearthly intensity in his october gaze that made you tremble. His fingers traced your jawline in a gentle caress, quivering as they brushed over your lips. His quiet admittance echoed deafeningly in the space between you, wrapping itself around the settled tension in the air and filling you both with an unbearable longing.

"Noah," you whispered, your eyes fluttering closed. The rain was persistent; its rambling rhythm provided a haunting melody to your escalating heartbeats.

You placed your hands on top of his that held your face.

"Why now?" You managed to make your voice steady amidst the turmoil within.

"Because it's never too late, right?" His voice quivered with a hopeful note. You nodded weakly against his touch before daring to open your eyes again, “There are no longer any barriers. You’re here- I’m here- nothing else is in the way to hold us back anymore.”

He was holding his breath, terrified that with the next exhalation he might shatter the moment hanging between you.

"Maybe..." he began, his voice barely above a whisper, "Maybe it's time we take a chance on us."

A dozen emotions warred within you, and it was terrifyingly beautiful as pieces of him echoed through your nerves.

"Is there an 'us'?" You countered quietly, words tangled in a knot of apprehension.

"There could be," he whispered, placing his forehead against your own. Droplets of water fell between your skin.

Your heart stuttered inside your chest at his words.

“Can I kiss you now?” he took a deep breath swallowing his nerves.

Feeling your pulse quicken, you let out a shaky sigh. This wasn't how you had planned your evening- certainly not a premature reunion with long-locked-away feelings.

Yet, in that moment, any traces of reluctance were drowned by the insistent tug of something deep within you; a longing for closure, perhaps, or maybe even the feeling of what should have been all along?

"Yes," you barely recognized your own voice.

The corners of Noah's mouth curled into the semblance of a smile. He didn’t hesitate as he leaned in close, his warm breath fanning over your cheeks and making your eyelids flutter shut.

The world came crashing onto a standstill as his lips met yours, slow and hesitant at first before engulfing you in a fervor you could only associate with years of suppressed desire and regret. The taste of his lips was like coming home after an eternity; familiar yet carrying hints of something new and enticing.

Your body ached with need as reality blurred around you and Noah, your lungs catching every roll of his lips and breath as your mind raced. He was everything you had ever wanted- and this moment was something you dreamed of years ago.

He pulled you against him, the force of it making your teeth click, but not enough to hurt. Your hands clung to his shirt, cloth wrinkling beneath your desperate grasp as the intensity of your kiss increased. His hand pressed between your shoulder blades, fingers splayed widely against the drenched fabric of your top. Noah’s grip was so tight, his lips so hungry, as if afraid you’d let go.

"Noah," you mumbled against his lips, his name a soft plea. The kiss deepened, his body pressing further into yours with possessiveness and urgency.

Each drop of rain felt like a spark against your skin as his tongue traced the seam of your lips. His arm around your waist pulled you closer until there was no room left for regret, only the raw shiver of anticipation simmering beneath every touch, every breath.

"I've wanted this for so long..." He confessed between kisses, his voice breathless and filled with longing.

His words danced over your skin like electric shocks, each syllable a promise etched against your parted lips. Noah was a heartbeat, a rhythm so intimately familiar that you wondered how you ever survived without it.

“Me too.” You mumbled.

Slowly, he broke away; pausing just inches from your lips to simply hold you in his arms.

And as his brows furrowed and eyes darkened even more than you thought they possibly could, you swore there were tears mixing with the rain that fell down his cheeks.

His thumb traced the curve of your chin, an absent-minded gesture as he gazed at you.

"Did that... did it feel right?" His voice held a hint of insecurity, a shadow of doubt. Swallowing hard, you nodded, unable to say anything before reaching up to hold the back of his neck, and pull him into another long kiss.

You smiled, “I want to know what should have been. What will be. With you.”

His lips crashed into yours again, this time with a fervor that sent shockwaves through every nerve in your body. His hands were an orchestrated chaos, roaming your back and sides, desperate to elicit a response that would match his own longing.

“I want that too,” He whispered against your mouth, the utterance of those five words producing an unforgettable melody echoing the long-suppressed desires within both of you.

Your tongue lightly danced along his lip, and Noah held the back of your neck, pulling you closer to his mouth. The taste of him against your tongue made your limbs warm despite the cold, the craving of his fingers pressing into your skin irreplaceable to anything you ever felt before.

It felt right somehow, breaking barriers of the past and what could have been, only to embrace this newfound feeling- electric and full of hope.

Noah carried you back to his car after some time, both drenched from standing too long under the downpour.

In silence, you relished the warmth seeping through you. The radio sprang back to life as Noah fired up the engine again, flicking on the windshield wipers. He sighed, glancing at you with a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he reached over to manipulate the car's heater settings.

The journey back into town was quieter than before. The rain tapped rhythmically against the roof as you leaned against the window, staring absently at the stirring city below. Noah drove in silence, occasionally stealing glances in your direction- a soft yet unreadable gaze that sent shivers running down your spine.

“You’re a great kisser- so please forgive my younger self’s ignorance.”

"Will do," you managed to laugh, your chest tight with a newfound vitality. He chuckled, throwing you an amused sidelong glance.

The city lights streaked past in a blur, reflecting off the wet streets. The late-night pedestrians were rushing into their homes or into nearby pubs, attempting to dodge the heavy downpour. But inside the car, everything felt muted; as though time had been brought to standstill, after all this time.

You traced your slightly swollen lips with fingertips trembling faintly from leftover exhilaration. You could still taste him on your tongue; it was a taste you already knew you yearned to become familiar with.

Suddenly, he slowed the car to a halt in front of your apartment complex.

"I should get going," you murmured quietly, lying to him and yourself. "Thank you for tonight.”

He nodded, turning to face you once again. You watched him, your eyes tracing over every detail of his face; the bridge of his nose, the shape of his lips, and the curve of his cheeks- all before latching onto his gaze.

You unbuckled your seatbelt and before opening the door, hesitating for a moment.

“Do you want to come in?”

+++++

part two here

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[linkenthusiast]

Hello and salutations! I saw your requests were open and was wondering if I would request some headcanons on how the Chain would react to realizing they were in love with a gender neutral reader? If not, no worries!

I am really excited about all your future work and hope your time here is bright and filled with good people and good memories! Hope you have a wonderful day!

Haiii you beautiful person <333

I hope you’re also having a wonderful day, thank you sm for this request :>

Scenarios just kept increasing in words the farther I went, so sorry if any of the earlier ones seem shorter—

Ofc not proofread <33

ALSO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG

Realizing they love you

Sky

- Sky takes the least amount of time to realize that he likes you.

- the way that he loves to quietly observe you and take care of you, silently scotching closer so that he can just be in your presence.

- for him it just clicked at some point that he wants a life and a future with you, just like that.

- it doesn’t make him any less nervous about it though! He’s still so goofy and lovable about it.

- he loves carving you some gifts and playing his harp around you (bonus if you sing with him) and he just…loves being with you.

- it’s so funny because the chain probably had a clue before he did when he constantly talked about how pretty you are and funny and so on so forth.

- Legend got an earful.

“They’re wonderful, y’know?” Sky said again for the nth time that day to Legend.

“The way they’re so caring and kind and beautiful, and smart and— I can easily go on…” He sighed.

You were doing your regular chores while the team was setting up camp and left Sky paired up with legend to fo some maintenance on their shields and swords.

“Sky, if you don’t shut up I’m gonna shove your cape down your throat.” In which Sky just laughs to. Legend gives him a glare.

“I love them…” he stares at the sky with a dreamy gaze and his head resting on the palm of his hand. In his mind, it felt natural to say those words. Like nothing else in the world can be truer for him.

In that moment, you walk back to the camp and Sky is already over to you in an instant, to which Legend just scoffed to.

Time

- his hard exterior makes it super difficult to notice any changes with him when it comes to growing attraction for someone.

- the chain notice despite that, especially Twilight and Warrior being the closest to the old man :D

- he’s the subtle type, unconsciously always being aware of you and trying to accommodate for you.

- he does it in a way that makes you think that he isn’t doing it for just you but also for the rest of the team. Taking breaks when you look exhausted or sharing his food that he just happens to not finish with Wind and you.

- the moment he realized it was when he was watching you and Wind having a bit of fun.

Running around in water were you and Wind in his hyrule. Time watched from the shore with a calm expression. The way you splashed water all over Wind and Aryll was cheering for Wind from beside Time.

Giggles and laughter echoed through the water, and Time’s thoughts started to wander.

You had a beautiful laugh, the water dancing on you, making you shine brilliantly under the sun.

Aryll ran into the water to join the fun, suddenly jumping on you as you caught her before falling into the shallow water and hallowing with laughter.

The scene in Times mind, slowly shifted as he imagined you with children that look very similar to you and him. He halts and screams in his mind, realizing that he loved the thought too much for it to be normal.

Does he want it? Yes, absolutely with no hesitation.

Warrior

- he really avoided you at the start. He has a hard time with love in general, he’s been hurt too many times.

- he’d naturally put his feelings to the side and prioritize everyone else, they say ignorance is bliss.

- The captain notices you though, whether he wants to or not. The way you take care of the chain in your own way and are so effortlessly friendly and outgoing when around them.

- you frantically worry over all of them whenever they get hurt. He’ll never say it out loud but whenever he does he absolutely drowns in your attention.

- he loves having your eyes on him, though in an embarrassing situation, he would die happy on this hill.

Wars was on scouting and ended up in a bit of trouble, coming back to camp with a couple bruises and scratches. Nothing too serious in his opinion but he understands that he’ll need a moment to heal before he goes out again.

You, beautiful you, ran over to him and checked every part of him to see the damage. You told him to sit down and so he did, watching you bring out some bandages. Your concern is written on every part of your face.

“You shouldn’t have confronted them. For a captain that was very dumb of you!” You scolded, starting to clean his more bloodied pulp of scratches, the lack of potions in the area proves to be a bit of a struggle.

He let out a nervous laugh, “well, I got through it didn’t I?” He winced at the glare that was immediately shot at him.

You carefully lifted his arm, motions practiced with the way you wrapped it in bandages. He couldn’t help but soften at you, your words and your actions. He’d do anything to alleviate that worry from your pure heart.

His heart beat quickened at the thought of kissing your thoughts away.

He coughed into his fist, a furious blush running through his cheeks to his ears. “You okay? You’re a little red…”

He took off his scarf, “nah just— a little hot”, wiping off a sweat for extra effect. You aren’t good for his heart.

Twilight

- he probably has a hard time differentiating between his affection for family and friends to romantic.

- he honestly just thought that he was more affectionate with you because you seemed to really like it. Or that you just happened to be close by every time he wants to throw his hand around a shoulder.

- he’s a bit oblivious it’s almost frustrating too. The chain absolutely notice his increase in affection towards you in which they would tease poor oblivious you about it.

- what he also doesn’t realize is that his subconscious is always trying to stay around you, always aware of where you are and what you’re wearing and what you smell like and how you’re feeling— okay he may have gone a little overboard. Absolute rain bomb of teasing.

You were chatting Twilight’s ears away about whatever interested you, whether it was about your world or your hobbies or what you may even be curious about in Hyrule. He’s always willing to lend an ear, which benefits him too when he loves your voice so much. He’d never get tired of it even if it was earrape.

He smiles softly at your own bright features showing any form of excitement or content, he almost zoned out just staring at you.

“Twi?” Oh how he wishes it was his name instead. “Mm, need somethin’, love?” He blurts out, his own words not quite hitting him yet. However, you noticed, but opted to shake your head with a red face, not quite trusting your voice. Something about Twilight’s accent usually gets to you, this was no different if not worse.

Your flustered expression hits him, and his words even harder. He blushes hard, coughing into his fist. “S-sorry bout tha uh… I-I think I’d better go help champ’ with somethin’…I’ll chat ya later? Yea?” He words frantically, quickly escaping the scene, leaving you both red and a whole group of blonds chuckling in the back.

Wild

- he doesn’t really notice much about himself, too focused on what’s around him and his feelings are third or at most fifth priority on his list.

- it doesn’t help that it gets worse.

- anyway, he also has a hard time expressing himself the way he wants to, so in a way he’s both an open book but super confusing.

- he’s so curious about the life around him and super reckless, he’s an adventurer at heart. He’d be rightfully curious about you always wants to hear about you and learn more.

- He makes sure to keep notes of everything so he never forgets. He knows your favourite food, your favourite animal, colour and more.

Wild couldn’t take his eyes off of you the whole day. The sad cloud that seemed to follow you never dissipated, leaving you in a sad gloom that never improved. It instead seemed to get worse.

Wild didn’t know what it was, but he was determined to try and make you feel better. And if he knew anything, is that food is the way to a person’s heart.

He had made up his mind. Dinner time was approaching and he had pulled out his best recipe that he knew you’d enjoy.

Everyone’s chatter filled the camp as bowls of said food was being passed around. Wild had walked up to you with a bowl in his hand and sat beside you.

“Here.” He says, handing you the bowl. Curiously you take it and the smell of the food catches your interest. “Is this…?” You looked up at him, stars in your eyes. He nodded, “I wanted to hear your opinion on it, see if I improved it.” He simply replies.

Your face sparkled, coming even more to life as you took the first bite and sighing into the flavour. “Oh my god Wild this tastes amazing!! This is just what I needed!!” A smile breaks out on your face, Wild huffed at your excitement and chuckles.

“There’s definitely more it you want, there’s always more for you…” he whispered that last part to himself. He wasn’t sure what it is about you that made his heart all warm and fuzzy, but he doesn’t mind getting a little more. If giving you all your favourite foods is what gives it to him then by god is he going to make a ridiculous amount for you.

Legend

- Denial is a river in Egypt

- DENYYY~~~~ DENY DENY~~

- bro can’t even be bothered to think about it anymore, he knows it and he won’t acknowledge it for the life of him.

- he refuses to go through it again, but as more time goes on it goes deeper and deeper than what he would’ve liked.

- he starts noticing you more, your little habits and quirks, lightly scolding you for stuff you fall off of but always ready to pick you back up where you need it. He’s the most overprotective and overbearing and is willing to put himself in harm’s way so that you won’t get hurt.

- he knows that it isn’t good for him to care so much, but what can he do now?

Legend was in charge of camp watch, keeping his eyes pealed for any movement and ears for any sound.

As it happens, shuffling was heard from behind him and he instantly snapped towards it, only to realize that it was you.

Moving around in a way that only sends distress signals to Legend’s head. He went over to you, as he got closer he noticed your crying. It crushed his heart, but he immediately ignored it and went to shake you awake.

You gasped, eyes opened wide as the blurry figure of Legend adjusts in your head. Your tears are still falling down your face as your nightmares replay over and over and over in your mind. You can’t get them out.

“Hey, heyyy hey hey… shhh it’s okay, it— it wasn’t real…” Legend rubbed your arm softly, trying to ground you. His heart cried out, wanting to give you more than simple words of comfort.

“L-Legend…?” You wiped another tear, looking up at him with the worst puffy eyes he’d ever seen. He thinks you still look beautiful, but he couldn’t stop the aching in his chest. Wanting to hold you, wanting to protect you from the world, even your dreams. He realizes that’s the one thing he can’t really do, but he’d go to hell and back to make you feel better. Your head fell to his chest as you sobbed a little more, Legend didn’t hesitate to hold you tightly until you fell back to sleep in his arms.

He’s screwed.

Hyrule

- probably doesn’t realize altogether until you confess first!!

- he can’t really differentiate between different types of love or what it’s supposed to feel like. He knows romantic love exists—just never the fact that he would ever get it himself.

- one thing he can’t get over is how nervous he gets around you, he doesn’t understand it. However every time you do something for him he always has those butterflies in his stomach and wants to return it to you tenfold.

- he’s super insecure about himself so feels like whatever he does for you is his own self worth, someone wake him up from this cycle.

At the market, everyone was stocking up on supplies. Going for more arrows, potions and bombs to help them navigate their adventure.

Luckily for Hyrule, he had a bit more rupees in his budget to spend. He looked around the sales man shop for a bit, to which he finds a cute little charm. Shaped in a form of a simple flower with a little clip attached to it, it reminded him of you. As sweet as a flower and as colourful as the petals.

He’s gravitating closer to you every day, not even realizing it. He buys it instantly, keeping it in his pocket to give it to you later.

The group goes to meet up and are ready to head out, Hyrule kind of penguin waddles to your side.

He doesn’t even know why he’s so nervous, but he really wants to give this to you. “Hey, I have a little something for you.” He catches your attention, pulling out the charm and placed it in your hand.

“Oh! Rulie, It’s so cute!!” You happily exclaimed. “Wait I have an idea.” Your hand works its way around the charm, clipping it to your hair. “Does it look good?” Rulie’s heart melts at the sight of you with his gift and nods almost breathlessly, “yeah…it does.”

Four

- he’s a normal man with a normal job and almost a normal life.

- with his emotions all scattered when he splits, he learns to express himself a lot more, or at least work through his emotions for himself so he’s in control.

- he’s noticed that his emotions have had a shift since you started traveling with them. He couldn’t pin point it at the start.

- however as it grew, it slowly became more obvious to him that he was growing more attraction for you. The way you carry yourself, your effortlessly friendly vibe had him pulling closer.

Your voice always stood out in Four’s opinion. Not because your voice was loud or quiet, but it still felt like a melody every time you spoke.

His ears perked up every time you expressed yourself— speaking, laughing, scolding wild for a stupid antic. He can’t get enough of it.

When he went to the stream to collect some water, he was pleasantly surprised to see you there cleaning some clothes. Even better, your soft voice was humming a tune he didn’t recognize.

It carried through the wind, the trees and leaves seemingly playing an orchestra to enhance your voice even more. The grass danced along, and the water splashed in beat. He couldn’t help but stand there and watch you a little longer.

He smiled to himself, his heart warming at your voice. Before he interrupts you, he thinks he’ll watch from afar for now, as the red in his heart screams in joy at hearing his favourite melody.

[axenyan]

Don't try this at home ⚔️

(ref: lessing talk 1)

[chaoticwriting]

WORLD CLASS HERO

Phantom is a world class hero that is often associated with the Justice League. Though he never officially joins them, Phantom is known enough that people will always treat him kindly.

His first major appearance is when a big tsunami about to hit Japan. All the other heroes can do is evacuate the civilian as they try their best to stop the tsunami. When all hope is lost, a figure with white hair and black and white jumpsuit appears out of thin air and releases an ice beam out of his hand. It takes less than a second for the tsunami that the whole Justice League struggles to stop to freeze and stop right then and there.

He doesn't stop there nor does someone get a picture of him as all his pictures are blurry at best. The only evidence that he is there is the eyewitness and the frozen tsunami that seems to melt slowly over time. After that, he is often seen in multiple parts of the world, mainly where there are no heroes based there. From the middle east, to south east Asian, all around the world he can be spotted stopping crimes and helping people.

It is not a whole year later that the Justice League finally got in contact with Phantom when a major attack by Darkseid almost killed all the heroes. Millions of his army swarm the earth from multiple portals around the world killing and slaughtering people left and right. It is also that night that the people figure out that so far they have only seen a fraction of Phantom's power.

A screech boom towards the whole world. To people of earth, it sounds like a cry of pain and despair, of sadness and suffering, sounds of their loved one asking for help but to Darkseid and his army it sounds like war cry, like deep anger and fury, like the cry of a warrior promising revenge. The results of the cry leave the people of Earth sobbing while simultaneously knocking down all of Darkseid's army.

Just as everyone thought it was over, hundreds of thousands of eldritch beings summoned from a giant green portal appear out of thin air. From the front a girl and a man leads the army.

The girl raises her hand and shouts "By the order of King Phantom, eliminates all the enemies." Multiple screeches and roars sound at the same time and those beings rush towards the Earth, slaughtering the unconscious parademons without hesitation. The Earth general population lets out a sigh of relief that it is not them that is the target and some sharp ones catch on the fact they receive order from someone named Phantom. Is it the same Phantom they know? That is later to be figured out.

At the same time the Justice League are watching as Phantom brawling against Darkseid and the man and the girl that came out of the portal fight against Darkseid's elites.

As time passes, lesser and lesser parademons are left on earth with all of them being dragged back into the green portal. When all the parademons are taken away, Phantom and the man and girl forms suddenly change into something more eldritch in nature.

The girl now looks more windy with her form still humanoid but a lot less solid than before. Her ears are pointy with like an elf and whenever someone looks at her, they feel free and unrestrained.

The man in comparison looks a lot more domineering. His fiery white hair and red eyes along with his buff figure gives off an oppressive feeling to people around him.

Compared to the other 2, Phantom form seems almost nonexistent. In fact the only reason people know he is there is because of the cold breeze that accompanied his surroundings. But to people that truly observe him, they feel like it is hard to focus on him. Like space itself warps light to make it hard to see him. His icy crown and golden ring makes it hard for people to stare too long at him. For if you stare too long into the abyss, the abyss will stare back at you. That quote comes to mind when someone wishes to describe Phantom.

After they transform, the remaining battle ends as if Darkseid and his elites are merely children throwing a tantrum. When Darkseid and his army are dragged back into the green portal and with that, the whole world falls silent.

For the world, it is only a year later that Phantom returns as a hero and continues helping people. But for those in the knows, they know that in the year Phantom is gone, the other realms are thrown into chaos as one after another, tyrants and evil gods are either captured, imprisoned or straight up killed.

The Justice League first gains the news when Raven informed them that his father and his army had been slayed with his realm under new authority. Later Dr. Fate informed them that Klarion has been partially sealed. Batman also received news that League of Assassin has been disbanded after the whole league just disappears.

The JL tries to contact Phantom but no one can get in contact with him. Even after Phantom comes back, no one receives any explanation except not to worry.

[yyuangss]

GIRL TALK ! ( STAR RAIL MEN )

SUMMARY ! march 7th finds out you like someone. and as your best friend, it’s only right that she has to give her input on whether or not she approves of him.

NOTES ! i was in the mood to write something but this was last minute and this was all i could come up with 🤺 may do a part two featuring other star rail men but we will see. part two of girl talk (gepard, dr. ratio, aventurine, and boothill)

TAGS ! reader is not the trailblazer. contains dan heng, caelus, sampo koski, jing yuan, and argenti. feelings are mutual on both ends.

march 7th’s thoughts on . . . DAN HENG !

immediately tells you that she already had her suspicions. and now that you confirmed it, it makes her all that more excited. you having a crush on dan heng is just what she expected. she’ll go on and on about how you two would make a great couple because he opens up more to you. now she gets a little sneaky and begins to make up excuses whenever missions come around so that the two of you can go together. it’s her own way of being a mastermind. the more time you two spend together, the closer she is to seeing you and dan heng start dating. yes, march has dubbed herself as your personal wingwoman. so is the duty of being your best friend.

march 7th’s thoughts on . . . CAELUS !

of course she finds it cute that you have a crush on caelus. and it all makes sense to her now. she constantly hears you and caelus making the same kind of jokes, watches you two play games together on your phones, and on rare occasions, she’ll find you rummaging through trash cans with caelus. though she doesn’t know why you’d go to such lengths and go through the trash cans with him. admitting your feelings for the newest trailblazer will only make march relentlessly tease you about it in the best way possible. so whenever caelus invites you to join him in whatever shenanigan he has planned for the day, she’ll send a quick wink your way.

march 7th’s thoughts on . . . SAMPO KOSKI !

she’s mentally judging you. definitely finds this as a “to each their own” type of situation. out of everyone you guys have met, the one you have feelings for is sampo. march isn’t too fond of him despite how much he has helped them during their time in belobog. she does have a few doubts here and there, but if he’s currently the one who you’re interested in, she’ll go along with it. march has to observe the way he acts before making any big decisions like setting you two up. she can tell the feeling’s mutual by the overly flirtatious comments sent your way or gifts you receive by sampo when visiting belobog again. she’ll sometimes peek over your shoulder and see some messages coming in from him, asking when you’ll come back to see him. she could grow used to him so let her work her magic and you’ll be with him in no time.

march 7th’s thoughts on . . . JING YUAN !

the general of the luofu is a tough decision. although she believes he’s a great choice considering his high rank and popularity, it’s also a bit of a downfall. she saw some heavy chemistry between you both back when the express was currently at the luofu. she didn’t have enough time to make some comments but she knew you’d end up having some sort of feelings towards him. she’s only worried about the cons that could come. like the fact jing yuan can become a busy man within seconds. would he make enough time for you? no, he needs to because someone like you deserves it. march refuses to let her best friend settle for anything less than what she’s worth. march can trust that you’ll be in good hands with jing yuan.

march 7th’s thoughts on . . . ARGENTI !

it’s a very interesting choice in her opinion. though she understands why you’d end up gaining feelings towards him. it had to be that compliment he gave you the very first time the express met him. “a beauty that was sent by the goddess idrila herself for him to praise”. very poetical that it had the entire crew speechless for a few seconds. march hasn’t stopped bringing it up since that happened because you had never gotten that flustered before. she can only imagine all the other compliments argenti has sent your way when they’re not around. whenever you’re smiling at your phone a little too hard, thinking no one is watching, she’ll head over your way asking if your boyfriend’s the one making you all smiley. march doesn’t even need to be your wingwoman for this one. she knows the knight will handle it all on his own.

[fenya-scribbles]

Hips

Network: @stayphone

Pairing: BFF!LeeKnow x fem!reader

Other Characters: Hyunjin

Summary: Dancing is a dangerous thing to do. 

Genre: best friends to lovers, smut, fluff, 18+ MDNI

Content warnings: explicit sexual themes, oral (f receiving), piv, fingering (f receiving), unprotected sex (don't be stupid)

Word Count: 3531

A/N: It took too damn long, but I finally finished it. Hope you enjoy ;)

"Please!", you draw out the word, giving your best friend the biggest puppy eyes you can muster. You've been begging him to let you sit in on his dance practice with the members for weeks now, but so far he'd refused every time. "No", he said, moving swiftly through his bedroom, packing his sports bag, “you’ll only distract the others.” "Come on, Min, just once! I just wanna see you sweat." You give him a suggestive grin from where you sit on his bed. It's not a lie either, you'd love to see him sweat. Maybe not from dancing, but still. 

Minho stopped his movements, focussing his eyes on you. You’ve been doing this for a while now, throwing lines like this at him. And his self-control started wearing thin, but you didn’t know that. Yet. “If I let you join today, will you promise to shut up about it?", he asked, eyebrows raised. He knew this was a stupid idea, but he also needed you to stop pestering him about it. You and him and dancing was a deadly combination, one that would test his restraint to no ends, but at least this way, he wouldn’t be alone with you. Because when he looked at you, he didn’t just see his best friend. He hadn’t for a long time. He saw a beautiful, witty, intelligent and devilishly attractive woman who’d stolen his heart. But he couldn’t tell you. He couldn’t risk your shared bond, he couldn’t risk losing you. 

Your heart leaped in your chest. Was this it? Had you finally worn him down? "Yes, I swear", you said, "just take me with you this one time and I'll shut up about it." You were most definitely never going to shut up about it. Watching him move through the world the way he did already sent your mind to unholy places, but watching him dance? In sweatpants? Surrounded by 7 equally as handsome men? No way you'd ever be able to shut up about that. Because you loved watching Minho in his element. You loved watching him cook and take care of his members in his own subtle way, you loved listening to him sing, you loved being around him, you just simply loved him. But alas, there was no way that would lead to anything, not if you didn’t want to risk the friendship. So you took what you could get. Dance practice. 

Minho sighed and said: "Fine. But behave yourself." You decided to pointedly ignore the way his command went straight to your core. You were less than successful, earning a sassy smirk from the man. “Shut up”, you said, pointing your finger at him. Minho knew that you found him attractive, you told him frequently. And he also knew about your subby tendencies, as much as you’d tried to hide them. But with the tension between the two of you and his urge to be in charge, especially around you, there had been no way to keep it to yourself. Minho was observant, he could read you like a book. Sometimes you wondered if he knew about the feelings you harboured for him, but since he never did anything about it, you figured it didn’t matter either way.

***

The drive was silent, but not uncomfortable. It was one of the things you loved about your friendship with Minho. You could just be quiet around each other, just exist in each other’s space comfortably. He was a good man and a great friend, and you cherished him with your whole heart. Watching him drive, eyes focused on the road and jaw slightly clenched in concentration, stirred something within you. The feeling was warm and soft and you urged to just grab his hand and be domestic. And your fingers twitched, but you held back after all, too scared to make a wrong move. It was one thing to blatantly flirt with him, you could always say you were just joking. But grabbing his hand? Now that would be more difficult to explain without putting your heart on the line.

When you arrived at the JYPE building, Minho turned to you after stopping the engine, eyes narrowed and locked with yours. “You know the rules?” You rolled your eyes. “Yes, I know the rules.” “Then recount them.” You raised your eyebrows at him. “You heard me. Recount them.” Minho’s eyebrows were furrowed, creating that adorable crease between them and you had to stop yourself from smiling at him. He was utterly serious about this. “No distracting anyone from practice. No interruptions. No pictures or videos.” “Good”, he said with a nod, and then with a grin he added: “Now get out of my car.” You playfully punched his arm before getting out with a giggle. 

The practice room didn’t feel too big, but that might also just have been because of the 8 men that were scattered around it stretching themselves and each other. You quickly found that they took their warmups pretty seriously, so you just watched them from your spot on the bench, catching one or the other look at you from time to time. Hyunjin looked at you the most, and he grinned every time. He’d been the most excited about you walking in after Minho, and your best friend had given him a less than approving glance for it. But that was the usual thing to happen, Hyunjin liked to flirt with you just to tease Minho, although you didn’t quite understand why it worked. Minho never had returned your flirting in earnest, so why was he upset if Hyunjin did?

You kept to the rules, even though it was hard. You wanted to film them so bad, but alas, you decided not to pick a fight with Minho tonight. He’d never let you step foot in here again otherwise. Instead, you watched them dance, taking note of their muscles flexing and their hips rolling and their bodies spinning around. And as you had assumed, watching Minho dance was a transcendent experience. He looked so damn hot, the way he controlled his body, the way he instructed the others, the way that he was completely in his element. And it did something to your heart, to your mind, to your whole body. You didn’t even notice how hard you’d pressed your thighs together until they decided to take a break, and you let out an unintentionally shaky breath. 

“So, Y/N, are you enjoying yourself?”, Hyunjin asked as he sauntered over to you. “Mhm”, you hummed, eyes wandering over his sweat soaked body, “it’s quite the show.” “Really? What’s your favourite part?” He smirked at you, that signature playful glint in his eyes. Minho was standing not far off, drinking his water but never taking his eyes of Hyunjin and you. “Hmm”, you said, pretending to think about it, “I like that thing you do with your hips in the pre-chorus.” Hyunjin immediately did the move you were talking about. “This one?” You hummed affirmatively and bit your lip as you watched him roll his hips just a little too smoothly. “How do you even do that?”, you asked with a giggle, eyes nervously darting to Minho for a second. Your best friend was still watching you, like a cat watching a mouse. 

“I could teach you”, Hyunjin said, and with a short glance around, lingering on Minho a tad too long, he added: “Privately.” And that’s when Minho had enough. “Don’t be stupid, Hyunjin”, he said, taking a few steps towards you, “she’d only hurt herself.” You gasped and made a pretend-shocked face at him. “Ah, Hyung, you have no faith in me, huh? I bet I could teach her that move in no time.” Hyunjin winked at you, the grin on his face only widening. He clearly enjoyed this. “And I can put you into my air fryer in no time. Don’t forget who you’re talking to, dumpling.” At that, Hyunjin let out a giggle and threw up his arms in defence. “Alright, alright.” Then he turned to you. “Sorry, princess, no dance lessons for you, I fear.” And before anyone could say anything else, Chan clapped his hands ordering everyone to resume practice. 

***

“Why did you shut him down?”, you asked, as you lounged on Minho’s couch, lazily running your fingers through Soonie’s fur. The cat purred happily beside you, enjoying your gentle touch, while his owner sat in his armchair, Dori in his lap. Doongie was curled up by your feet, soundly asleep. “Shut who down?” “Hyunjin. About teaching me that move.” It had been two days since the dance practice and you’d tried to forget about it, but something about the situation had it suck in your head and you just couldn’t let it go. “Oh”, Minho said, eyes focused on the purring ball of fur in his lap, “you know how he is.” You raised your eyebrows at his non-answer. When you didn’t say anything he looked up, locking eyes with you. “I just don’t want him dancing with you”, he said, almost too quiet for you to hear. 

Your heart skipped a beat. Your hand stopped petting Soonie, as you processed what you just heard. The cat immediately protested, but you ignored him. Why not? You could ask. You could pry and push. But then, your brain went somewhere else. “You could teach me”, you said instead. “What?” “The move. You could teach me.” Minho blinked at you a few times, and then a smirk rushed over his face. It was only there for a second, but you’d seen it. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Y/N”, he said. “Oh, come on Min!” You pouted at him, eyes big for good measure. He squinted at you. “You’re not gonna let this go, are you?” “Never.” Minho sighed, knowing very well that this had the potential to end in catastrophe. “Fine, get up then.”

After helping Minho to rearrange his living room just enough to make space for dancing to happen, you found yourself standing in the middle of it, facing him. “So, what now?”, you asked. “Turn around.” You obeyed with a giggle. “Good. Now, you need to widen your stance. Like this.” Minho gently pushed your legs apart with his feet. “Now bend your knees.” You felt very grateful to your past self for attending those yoga classes, as you lowered yourself, bending your knees, keeping your wide stance. Just then, Minho circled you, assuming the same position opposite you. “And now you just have to roll your hips. Like this.” As you watched him move, you felt yourself blush, heat pooling at your core. It looked so damn hot and you couldn’t help but wonder what other things this man could do with his hips. 

But you forced yourself to return to reality, trying to imitate his movement. Minho had the absolute audacity to chuckle at your attempt. “Cute, but no”, he said, “let me help you.” He walked around you again, positioning himself behind you. Close behind you. So damn close, you could feel his body heat radiating against your back. The sheer lack of space between the two of you had the air shift drastically, a thick tension starting to build. He gently placed his hands on your hips, and you swallowed hard. “Move with me”, he said, voice low and so very close to your ear. And then he moved, gripping your hips a bit harder so he could steer them, his hips rolling behind yours. Slowly, you got into a rhythm, and out of sheer instinct, you started to lean back against his chest. “Good”, he purred, “you’re doing so good.” 

It was too much, he was too close, you were too whipped for him to simply endure this. And that’s when it slipped. “Min..” A short sigh, bordering on a moan, as your hips pushed back just a little too much, effectively grinding against him. Your heart stopped for a moment, your breath stuck in your throat, as you anticipated his reaction. He moved, straightening his legs, and you feared he would move away, break the tension, but his hands remained on your hips. His fingers dug into your sides for a second, then he pulled you out of your stance as well and spun you around. “What was that, kitten?”, he said, pulling your body against his own. “I…uh….”, you stammered, unable to form a sentence. Not when you were this close to him. Not when he called you kitten. 

Time stopped, as Minho’s eyes dropped to your lips, his fingers digging into your sides. Your breath hitched, your heart hammered against your ribcage, your core was positively throbbing, and all you could do was stare. Stare at his lips, stare at the way his ears turned slightly red, stare at his beautiful, darkening, half-lidded eyes. “Don’t be shy now”, he all but whispered, pulling you impossibly closer, pressing his crotch against yours - that’s when you felt it, felt him, hard and pulsing against you through his and your clothes. “Min…”, you repeated, unable to hold back, as you unintentionally leaned in just a bit. It was enough for him to act. You caught a glance of his smirk and then his lips were on yours, hot and hungry, as if he’d also been barely holding on. Your arms went around his neck in an instant as you lost yourself in the way he devoured you, tasting his tongue, becoming putty in his hands. 

You almost didn’t notice how he manoeuvred you backwards to the couch until your legs hit something soft, and he lowered you down onto it. Hovering over you, Minho examined you. Your lips were red and swollen, your pupils dilated, your breath ragged - he’d never seen you like that and it had his cock throb painfully. “We can stop”, he breathed, softly running his fingers over your cheek, because he knew, if he went one step further, he wouldn’t be able to stop. “No.” Your answer was immediate, almost a bit too fast, but you didn’t care. You wanted this, you wanted him. More than anything. And with your answer his expression shifted. Gone was any softness, replaced by sheer unadulterated lust, as he dove back into you, kissing you so sloppy, so greedy, that it had your whole body shaking beneath him.

Before you knew it, he was kneeling in-between your legs, hands exploring your body, slipping underneath your shirt, as he continued to kiss your lips, your face, your neck. He was all over you, taking control, and you melted beneath him, making the sweetest little sounds. His hands slid over your body, mapping out every inch, until he was cupping your breasts, squeezing, kneading, playing with your nipples. “You’ve no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this”, he breathed against your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses, teeth grazing your delicate skin. 

You were tangled up in each other, surrounded by nothing but heat and desire, so lost in the moment you didn’t even realise when he had pulled your shirt off or your pants down. All you knew were his lips trailing down your bare chest, sucking marks here and there, until his kisses found your inner thighs, hungry and teasing. His shirt had been discarded too, at some point, and you enjoyed the view of a shirtless, panting, borderline feral Minho sitting between your legs, looking up at you with lidded eyes as his tongue ran through your slick folds. 

“Fuck…Min…”, you gasped, rolling your hips against his face, but he was quick to grab you and keep you steady, as he hungrily kept licking and sucking at your core. When your hand went to his head, fingers quickly tangling in his messy hair, he hummed against you, sending another shiver right down your spine. It didn’t take him long to get you all riled up, tight knot already forming in your lower belly. And he knew it, too. You could feel him smirking against your skin as he slowly, deliberately pushed two fingers into your wet, needy hole. It pulled a deeply sinful moan from you, to which he had the audacity to chuckle. “You like that, huh?”, he said, lips not leaving you once, “come on, show me how much.” 

Minho had no mercy, pumping his fingers into you with reckless abandon, as his tongue continuously slid over your clit. It was driving you mad, your hips bucking against his now one-handed hold, but he was still keeping you firmly pressed against the couch. “Fuck...’m so close…”, you panted, to which he hummed against you once again. “Come for me, Kitten”, he purred, “let go for me.” And with that the knot snapped, sending a shockwave of pleasure through your body, thighs shaking, back arching, vision blurring. You were only half aware of the scream that escaped your mouth - or the satisfied smile on Minhos face as he helped you ride out your climax. 

You were gasping for air, slowly coming down from your high, barely noticing how Minho pulled his fingers from your core. “Fuck”, you panted, “that was…wow…” “Glad you liked it”, he said, hovering over you face to face once again. Slowly, he leaned down and pressed a soft, but still very hungry, kiss against your lips. “Think you can take more?”, he asked, his eyes still dark with desire. “I can take you”, you said, still a little breathless, “I want to.” “You sure?”, he smirked as he rolled his still covered crotch against your soaked, sensitive centre. 

“Ah…don’t be a tease, Min.” You let your hands run down his back and hooked your fingers into the waistband of his sweatpants. “Just fuck me already.” He didn’t need to be told twice. His pants and underwear were gone in an instant and you had only a short moment to marvel at the size of his cock. “Turn around”, he said, and you obeyed without hesitation. His hands were lingered on your butt for a while, grabbing, appreciating. But eventually, after you let out a few frustrated whines, he lined himself up. “Ready, kitten?”, he purred in your ear, and with your permission he slowly pushed himself in. 

Inch by inch he slowly filled you out. You held your breath as he stretched your walls, low grunts vibrating against your shoulder where his lips were locked to your skin. “Damn, kitten”, he rasped, “you’re so tight….so perfect...” When he finally bottomed out, you released your breath, feeling utterly full of him. And then he began to roll his hips, slowly at first, letting you adjust to his size. “Mhhh….Min….feels so good”, you moaned, as he sped up, hips snapping against your butt again and again and again. It was obscene, filthy, downright pornographic how he fucked you. Like he’d been thinking about it. Like he’d been starving for it. 

Your best friend’s dick drilled into you, hard and fast and ungodly, the angle too good, the size too perfect. You couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, only lewd noises coming out of your mouth as tears of pleasure stared to roll down your face. It felt too good. His hands gripped your hip tight enough to leave bruises, his breath was laboured and hot, his restraint was out the window. He fucked you like a feral beast, chasing his own release, and just when you thought he might not send you over the edge again, his right hand moved, fingers finding your clit. “Ugh…come…come with me kitten”, he panted, pressing and rubbing your most sensitive spot. 

You screamed into the pillow as the second orgasm hit, too overstimulated to care if the neighbours would hear you, too fucked out to have any control. Your whole body shook as you felt him pulse inside you, hips stuttering, painting your insides white. Your whole body tingled, as you collapsed beneath him, unable to hold yourself in any position other than flat on the couch. He followed suit, panting and sweaty, chest pressed against your back, only barely managing not to put his whole weight on you. For a while, the both of you stayed like this, finding your breath, slowing your hearts.

Eventually, you could feel him press gentle kisses against your back as he carefully pulled himself out of you. For a moment he was gone, and then you were turned over and picked up, carried to the bathroom and set down in a tub of hot, soapy water. Minho climbed in behind you, legs wrapping around your waist, and pulled you back against his chest. And for a very long time, you just sat there, surrounded by warmth and silence, safety and comfort. Until your mind returned to you. Until you realised what had just happened and a smile rushed over your face. “Min”, you whispered without turning around. “Kitten”, he whispered back, gently resting his head on your shoulder. “I get it now”, you said, calm and quiet. He pressed soft kisses to your neck. “What d’you get?”, he asked. You chuckled. “Why you didn’t want Hyunjin to dance with me.”

Fenya’s Masterlist

[ivy-elle]

How they tend to you after getting injured

Feat. Albedo, Childe, Kinich, Scaramouche

A/N: Slightly suggestive in Childe's part, more so in Scaramouche's

“Move it a bit for me?”

You couldn’t help but grimace a little at that prospect. “I’d rather not.”

That promptly earns you a disapproving look from the alchemist. Which is quite an unusual sight for him, you think. He must be really concerned then.

“Slowly.” A soft musing laced in his voice as his fingers gently wrap around your wrist to move your hand at a slow pace.

You hiss quietly at the sharp pain. “It’s not broken,” you state, trying to convince yourself more than actually being sure of that.

“No,” Albedo attests, touching up your wrist, careful not to hurt you further, “it’s fortunately not. Yet, your wrist is in a less-than-ideal state.”

You raise your eyebrow and reply in a flat tone, “Really.”

Albedo’s eyes meet yours, unaltered. “Positive.”

Then his brows furrow as his gaze falls on something next to you on the table. He reaches for the bottle of painkillers you took earlier, inspecting them with concerned incredulity. “My love, I hope you didn’t expect to cure a sprained bone with these pills alone?”

 “Well…I mean, maybe?” you fumble with your words. “They’re good.”

Albedo can’t help the sigh leaving his lips as he shakes his head and grabs the pack of bandages, he prepared. “I will bring along some more profound remedy later if that’s alright with you.”

Carefully, he starts wrapping a string of bandages around your hand, making sure it sits steady and firm but not enough to be painful.

“Does that feel comfortable enough?” He shifts his eyes back to yours, observing closely for any indication of pain on your face.

Somehow his soft-spoken words seem to soothe the pain on their own Your heart tightens along with the last string of bandages as he seems to be so utterly tender and gentle with you.

“Yes,” you whisper. “Thank you. I’m sorry, for the fright earlier.”

“Nonsense.” Albedo gently lifts up your now bandaged hand and presses a feather-light kiss against the cloth. “I’m glad I could help.”

“You’re slacking more than usual. Where’s your fire today?”

The sounds of clashing swords against each other halt for a moment when Childe stems his sword into the earth beneath. He tilts his head as his arms sneak under to support his chin against the grip of his sword. A boyish grin on his lips as wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “Long night?”

You huff, mirroring his position. “Shut up, you shithead.” He knows damn well who’s to blame for your lack of sleep recently.

But Childe only snickers, like that smug ass he is, giving you a once-over. “Oho, we have a sore loser here I see.”

“You just want me to pay for the dinner tonight.”

“Precisely.” His smirk widens. “There is an evening waiting for you full of relaxation, notorious meals and of course the best company Liyue has to offer.” Childe takes a few steps back, widening his arms out in a dramatic manner. “Me.”

“See, I’d actually beg to defy that statement,” you start as you put your sword away. But when you look back up, the single head movement causes a sudden spur, your vision adorned by black dots for a moment. “Damn,” you huff, holding onto a tree for some support.

“Woah, there.” Within a second Childe is at your side, his hand reaches out, holding you in place. “You okay?” His tone has shifted into a more serious one.

You blink and your vision clears one more. A sort of sheepish, perhaps slightly embarrassed grin settles on your lips as you meet his eyes. “Yeah. That treasure hoarder must’ve gotten me a bit harder than I’ve assumed.”

But Childe doesn’t join in on your amusement and frowns instead. “What treasure hoarder? On your way to Liyue earlier?”

Exasperated, you run a hand through your hair as you get reminded of the events earlier that day. “Unfortunately.” An annoyed scoff escapes you. “Please, it was embarrassing enough as it is. Don’t make me live through that again.”

Childe’s eyes slightly darken and he’s quiet for a moment. Contemplating. As if settling on some plan. Then from one moment to the other, his expression immediately clears up again and he ruffles your hair in an affectionate way. “I suggest, we let the food deliver to us instead and you’re gonna tell me exactly what happened, hm?”

Disgruntled, you push his hand from your head. “Childe, it’s-“

“Ah-ah, no. Concussions should be treated seriously. Off you go now.” He shoos you forward gently, but now his arm is draped around your waist, just to make sure you’ll stay on your feet. “Come now.”

“You’re walking funny.”

Confused, you turn your head back around to where Kinich is walking behind you, raising your eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

Kinich’s eyes are focused on your feet, analysing. “Did you sprain your ankle?”

“No,” you turn back ahead, “it’s not that bad.”

His fingers take hold of your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. “May I see?”

You frown. “My foot?”

“Your ankle,” he corrects, his face unchanged.

“Right now?”

“Yes.” It’s obvious he isn’t up for any kind of discussion.

You look around the jungle you’re passing through. Quite the inconvenient setting.

“Kinich, I swear it’s-“

“Please.”

You nearly crumble. Both at his touch as well as the tender look in his eyes. So you relent with a sigh. “Alright, just-, “You look around for something to sit down. “Let’s get somewhere closed off, yeah?”

One settled on a nearby rock, Kinich crouches down in front of you, one hand on your calf the other on your knee. He sure seems like he’s done this a couple of times before. Well, in his line of work…

“Can you bend it?” Kinich asks then. Some strands of his hair fall into his face and you’re tempted to reach out and gently brush them away.

You blink. Focus.

“Sure. Well, I think I’d rather not bend it though.”

He hums, contemplative. “I’d rather you not as well.” After carefully checking up upon your skin and bones he looks up again to meet your eyes, a bit of a stern look on his face. More so than usual. “You realise this is swollen, right? Surely you must feel that?”

“Mayhaps,” you admit more hesitantly than he’d like.

Kinich frowns, sighs and then stands up. “Come on. I carry you. It’s not far off anymore, anyway.”

At that suggestion, your heart skips a beat. “No way.”

He crosses his arms. Then one eyebrow rises. “You think I’d dare to drop you?”

“I have dignity.” You explain and prop up your elbows as you lean back against the rock before you add, “And pride.”

“There won’t be much left of your pride if you continue to walk that way in the open.” He takes a few steps back with a glint in his eyes. “I’d put that into careful consideration as well if I were you.”

You squeeze your eyes at him. “You’re playing dirty.”

Kinich lips curve into a smile. Then he adjusts with ease and lifts you up into his arms. “And yet I win.”

You are in heaven. You could swear it.

It has been weeks now, where missions, the fatui or simple life have kept you away from each other, getting barely any time to spend.

And while Scaramouche might not outwardly admit that he’s missed you (or your touch), it is now quite evident in the way his lips adorn your skin, his fingers trailing along your body like he has to physically assure himself, you’re right here. Right beneath his very hands.

His hand slides down your midriff and his fingers grace the skin beneath your shirt, causing goosebumps to spread there. “Your fingers are cold,” you murmur dazedly between kisses, yet a slight amusement has found its way into your voice.

Scaramouche simply captures your complaint with his lips, a slight tug on his mouth. “Don’t tell me we have a temperature problem on our hands?”

“Not for long I hope,” you reply with a teasing grin and return the kiss again with more fervour. He obliges immediately.

But just as he’s about to slip your shirt over your head he pauses. You bite your lip to stop a few less-than-dignifying words from leaving your mouth and open your eyes instead. “What’s wrong? Too cold after all?”

Scaramouche’s hand tethers your waits as his gaze is locked on someplace on your ribs, the reverence from moments ago completely vanished. Now there’s a grim expression as his eyes dart down to you. “What happened here?”

You follow his line of sight where sure enough, the gash from one of your fights greets you. One, that you have perhaps pushed back farther into the depths of your mind for the sake of the moment.

“It’s nothing bad,” you explain. You feel somehow caught, trying to overplay the situation by mumbling on. “Seriously, just a stupid cut from days ago.”

“Do you think I’m stupid?” There’s an agitated tension in the room now as Scaramouche’s annoyance level rises and his expression darkens. “I know for a fact this hasn’t been here for a few days already. It’s fresh. And you’re aggravating it further.”

That prompts you to prop your elbows on the bed, frowning. “It’s not bleeding, it barely even hurts. It is fine. Absolutely. Can we just…?”

His eyes narrow at your words, jaw clenching. “Perhaps you’re the stupid one then.” He clicks his tongue in irritation and gets up from the bed, muttering some disgruntled curses.

Slowly, you sit up on the bed and pull your shirt back down to cover your midriff again. You watch him roaming around the room, gathering some utensils from the shelf at his side of the bed before he returns to sit beside you. Scaramouche doesn’t look at you. In unbent silence, he pushes you back down on the sheets to give him a better angle to the wound on your side. You swallow a grunt at the sharp pain and his grip on your waist tightens for a moment.

You observe him quietly as he works, eyebrows scrunched with his anger simmering just beneath the surface. Obviously, you’re aware that his irritation stems from the desire to keep you safe, from his protective nature, and his destined grief of you one day inevitably slipping through his fingers.

“Scara-“

“Shut up. I’m done already.”

His gaze meets yours once again and for a few silent moments, you just stare at each other, with unspoken emotions swirling around on both of your faces.

Then he suddenly scoffs and puts the utensils away. As if trying to shake off his sense of irritation. “Who risks their health in such a way just to get laid?”

You can’t help the grin spreading on your lips. “Hey, at least that’ll leave a sick scar.”

“I’m gonna murder you, y/n. I’m serious.”

He isn’t.

Thank you so much for reading! Comments and reblogs are so appreciated <3

[chilumi-shipper]

A prompt came into mind.. up to you if you're interested.

So, character and reader got married but character cheated because he said he doesn't love the reader anymore. They're technically done, but haven't finished doing the divorce files (because it's expensive and takes a long long time). But.. character got into an accident.. which made him forget everything that happened recently, and only remember the days he loved the reader. Reader's conflicted, the mistress that character has doesn't know what to do either. Character was confused on why he would marry anyone else when he has the reader fo begin with.

I think this fits your styles.

Btw, I LOVE ALL YOUR STORIES! I RE-READ THEM EVERYDAY-

Someone Better

Childe x Fem!Reader

Summary: Childe was a wild spirit, so when he got bored of your relationship, he sought the excitement of another woman. You were heartbroken, ultimately asking for a divorce. But just as your connection was almost severed, he got into an accident, losing every memory of his infidelity and returning to the man that made you fall in love him.

Tags: Cheating, Amnesia, Pining, Angst/No Comfort

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You were staring at the tremendous amount of divorce paperwork sitting on the desk of your hotel room.

It was very complicated, five years of marriage with joined insurance, property, bank accounts, and now you have to meticulously separate all your joined assets, all while constantly on the verge of a breakdown.

Not to mention you had no family to stay with in Snezhnaya. There's absolutely no one you could talk to about everything, you've left your homeland thinking your future in the cold nation with the love of your life would be nothing less that fantasy.

As you rest your head on the desk and closed your eyes tightly to ease the headache, your ears perk up as loud knocks hit your door.

With a groan, you got up and opened it to reveal your two of Childe's older siblings.

"He's looking for you." The older sister said, Alevtina, her seriousness evident, looking at you somewhat panicked.

"I know, big si-" I paused for a moment, closing my eyes and rubbing my temples. "I'm working on the assets, I'll send it as soon as possible."

"No." The chilly tone of the older brother, Alexei, sent shivers down your spine. "You need to come with us."

...

"Big sister Y/N is here?" You hear Teucer's innocent voice as you enter their home. The younger children laid their eyes on you, seemingly eager to come closer, but perhaps they've been told that now would not be the time.

"Honey... Thank you for coming..." Their mother embraced you warmly, still accepting you with motherly affection. "Oh dear, I'm so sorry..."

"Mama, has he calmed down?" Alexei asked from behind you.

Your mother-in-law parts from you slightly, looking at you tenderly. "She will definitely help."

You put your confusion and questions aside, seeing the somewhat tense air within the house.

"Stop staring." You weren't looking at him, but you felt his eyes watching you set down a tray of soup and medicine on his bedside table.

Childe lets out a chuckle. "Sorry, love, I can't help it..." His eyes never faltered, containing a look of admiration that you've been unfamiliar with for so long.

"After the avalanche, I got a pretty bad head injury. When I woke up, you were the first thing on my mind. And when Mama said you weren't here with me, I freaked out."

You sat down on a chair next to his bed, your eyes observing the bandages wrapped around his head. "What did the doctor say about your injury?"

"I'm gonna get some very bad headaches, and I also got a bit of amnesia, I think." Childe looks as if he's in thought. "Do I seem like I forgot something?"

"Maybe some things..."

"But I love you just the same! So I bet what I forgot wasn't even that important!"

...How cruel.

Having to take care of the man that broke you apart, even worse, a version of him that you loved too much to despise.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

It was painful, staying with him.

Childe would keep you close, call you his different pet names, cuddle up to you, all while you were under the pitiful gaze of his family that knew of his infidelity.

On the other hand, he's been feeling the cold responses his advances have been receiving. But to him, he thinks he can solve it by smothering you in more of his love.

He is pretty observant, he's put it two in two together that he may be missing a memory in which he had done something wrong. He just didn't know how much it had hurt.

Though, not only from you, Childe had also felt that his younger siblings seem distant as well, no longer asking him to play snow games outside, or looking up to him as some sort of hero.

One early morning, when he walks up to the kitchen to see you cooking for the whole family, a smile formed on his face.

He steps closer, wrapping his muscular arms around your waist. "Hmmm... Morning, honey..." He basks in the feeling of you.

You remain quiet, letting him do as he pleases. The ginger frowns, however, feeling unsatisfied by your lack of reaction.

"Babyyyy... Loveee meee backkkk..." He whines, nuzzling his face on your neck.

"Ajax, come on..." You stifled a laugh, moving slightly away as his action tickled you. He hears the slight giggle of your words, smiling against your skin.

You compose yourself, pushing him away from you. "Stop." He lets you push him away, and you feel him freeze slightly at the harshness of your tone.

His blue eyes looked at you worried. "...Hey," He starts. "I'm sorry, darling, did you not like that?"

With a sigh, you looked down. "When the others wake up, tell them I already made breakfast. I have somewhere to be."

You walk pass him, but you did not miss the hurt tone of the faint call of your name.

...

You come back to his family's home after doing some more paperwork for the divorce that your husband doesn't even remember, feeling your head pounding as you ready yourself to face him again.

What you don't expect to see this late at night is Childe sitting on the porch with a lantern next to him, his head hung low as if he's thinking deeply.

"Childe?"

He looks up, but he frowns at you. "Ajax, darling..." He reminds you.

Standing up, he pulls you into his warm embrace. "I love you... I missed you..."

His words take you aback, as you reluctantly wrap your arms around him.

"I've been thinking about this morning, about you. You hate me."

"I know I must've done something... you can tell me." He kneels in front of you, staring at your eyes while his sparkle with the light of the lantern. "And even if I don't remember, I'll make it right..."

As you look down at him, you see the fiery passion of love that burned in his eyes as he knelt down to ask you to marry him so long ago.

It scares you...

You might not be able to control yourself...

"It's just hard to take care of you sometimes." You smile ever so slightly, yet his frown only deepens as tears start to escape your eyes.

He stands, his hand finds its way to your cheek. "Love..." His eyes held such conviction that you've not seen for years. "I'm so sorry..."

You close your eyes to hold in the tears, shaking your head and swaying his hand away. "...You're not."

Despite the tears, you tug at his arm. "Come on, let's head inside."

He's filled with questions, but seeing your sad face makes him set all those aside and focus on you for now.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"Teucer, hey, little man." Childe calls for his little brother.

The little boy looks at him wide eyed. "I don't want to talk to you." He crossed his little arms, turning around to leave with a displeased look.

"What...? Oh come on..." The harbinger pouted, getting down on his little brother's level. "What did I do wrong...? All our siblings are acting so mean to me..." He whined, frowning as he tries to persuade the little ginger.

"But you were also very very mean!" Teucer refused to look at his older brother, the one he used to look up to the most. "We don't like you anymore!"

Childe's playful facade faded as his expression contorted to a confused one. "Hey, what do you mean...?"

"You're so mean to Y/N, you hurt her! She doesn't deserve tha-"

"Teucer!" Just as his brother erupted to a crying mess, screaming at him with all his little heart, their mother walked into the room, grabbing the little boy.

"Don't talk like that to your elders!"

"But it's true, Mama!"

"That doesn't matter, say sorry to-"

"What does he mean, Mama? Why did I do?" Childe looked at his mother expectantly, his voice starting to shake as he saw the fit of rage Teucer had because of him. "W-What did I do to Y/N?"

HIs mother shook her head, trying to ease her expression with a smile. "Nothing..."

"It's not nothing, Mama!" He raises his voice by accident due to his frustration. "I see it, the way she looks at me, it's different. The way you all look at me, like you have a monster inside your house."

Teucer forced his way out of his mother's hold, running to his older siblings room all teary eyed. Childe felt bad, but he desperately needed answers from his mother.

"Mama, please, I need to know why Y/N doesn't... love me anymore..." It hurts him to say, but based on the way you're acting, he could only make the assumption that your feelings have wavered.

"Oh, Ajax... it's not like that..."

The ginger then felt a sharp pain in his head, making him fall down onto the couch. He groaned as he clutched his head.

"Hey... where are you heading off to so late at night?" He hears your soft voice in a static audio playing in his head.

"Out." He then hears himself replying coldly.

"Ohh, when will you-"

He's out the door before you could even finish your question.

"Ajax, honey!' His mother's voice was a hazy blur as he keeps his eyes closed to envision what he's hearing in his head.

He tries to shake the feeling away, but his mind is flooded by fragmented memories.

"You've been going out a lot more recently." Your concerned voice entered his ears.

"I've been busy."

"Busy where?"

He then hears shatters of glass and yells as you sob while trying to talk to him.

He pictures your face, your crying, begging face, asking for some sort of salvation from his cold and merciless actions.

"T-There's someone else?"

"Someone better."

"H-How could y-you do this?"

"When I look at you now... I feel... nothing."

Childe opened his eyes, not realizing that tears had started to flow to his cheeks. "Mama..."

"Y-Yes, dear?"

"I hurt her..." He was in a state of disbelief. "I-I... Why...?"

His tears fell faster, looking at his mother for answers. "W-Why, Mama? Why was I so stupid? Why did I choose to lose her?"

"I don't know, dear, but that's simply what happened, and you could never make her forget that, even if you forgot."

His breathing started to accelerate, feeling like he wanted to punch himself. As his head started spinning, his vision turns black.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You took a deep breath as you walked into the house, feeling everyone's eyes on you as you entered.

"Honey..." Your ex mother-in-law embraces you once again, holding you tight. "I'm so sorry... I didn't want to make it difficult for you..."

"N-No, no..." You returned her hug, sniffling as you start to tear up. "I readied myself for this, I'm just here to drop off the final papers..."

"Could you talk to him?" Alevtina suddenly asked, looking at you hesitantly. "I know he's been a jerk... but he won't eat unless he talks to you."

You parted from their mother, feeling the pressure of their request.

"It's okay to curse him, or to scream, or rough him up, I'll even help you." Alexei placed his hand on your shoulder to comfort you.

You nodded, sighing as they guided you to his room. And as you entered with a heavy feeling in your chest, he immediately sat up, alerted by your presence. You stare at each other for a bit before you muttered a word.

"Hi." You greeted him shortly.

"Hey..." His voice was soft, and his eyes followed you attentively.

"I'm sorry to intrude, I'll make this quick." You breathe deeply, trying to relax yourself. "I finished the papers, split the assets, got the lawyers."

"I talked to her, y-your woman..." You looked down, fidgeting with your hands. Childe seemed unfazed by it, though his gaze seem to falter at the mention of 'his woman'.

"She... umm... wasn't really interested anymore after the accident..." You breathe heavily, feeling small under his gaze. "But... your family's here to take care of you..."

Clearing your throat, you continued. "I do have one request, if I could... I would like a safe boat ride back home." You stepped closer, intending to hand him the envelope that contained all the paperwork to finalize your divorce.

"Take it all." You stopped in your tracks as he spoke.

"The house, the mora, the boat. It's all yours..." He lays back on his bed, staring at the ceiling. "Would you also do me a favor?"

You looked at him, encouraging him to speak.

"Carve my heart out and take it with you."

"...Can we be serious for a second?" You sighed.

"I would like to stay with you. I think that would be a good way to do it without constantly wanting to punch myself." You noticed that his eyes started to flood with tears.

"Ajax... I'm sorry this happened to you..."

"No, Y/N, I'm sorry... I'm sorry for everything." He sat up again, tears falling from his eyes as he looks up at you with genuine eyes. "I don't know why I did that. And I... I regret it so much..." He reached for your hand, and you let him hold onto you for strength.

"Every tear I had in me I already cried when you left me for her." You smiled bitterly, though you remained soft, making him even more guilty as you try to stay strong. "But I appreciate the apology..."

You pull your hand away from him slowly, feeling that he was reluctant to let go.

"I-I still love you..."

You gave him a final smile. "You'll love someone better than me... Childe..." You back away, leaving him alone in his room still yearning for the days where his memory only consisted of loving you.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Hiiii again after quite a while! I think I've been noticing that my recent fics have been angst, I guess I just feel like hurting you guys this season of giving (I give pain :D)

Anywayy, anon, I think at some point I went my own direction and didn't fully stick to your request (I'm sorryyy TvT) but I hope you like it anyway!

[luxcuriousao3]

Summary: You're Kyle's old friend, and you've had a crush on him for ages. Too bad he has no idea, and leaves you high and dry to fuck some other girl. Thankfully, Price comes to the rescue. Word Count: 2140 Warnings: sfw, emotional hurt/comfort, alcohol, can be read as platonic Price/Reader Notes: This was supposed to be about Gaz showing off his hot gf to the 141 and making them jealous... but he was not cooperating lol. So now we have this. If I ever continue this, it will be a Gaz/Reader/Price love triangle, but who knows if I'll get the inspiration or have the time lol. As it is right now, it's just a moment of Reader being sad and silly and Price being the gentleman we all know he is. (Masterlist)

Gaz hasn't done a modeling gig since before he signed up to join the military, but he keeps in contact with the friends he made during that part of his life. One of whom (you) happens to have had a crush on him for years.

You've never said anything, though, and Kyle either knows and ignores it, or is completely oblivious. Either way, when you meet his team for the first time, you entertain their lingering stares in a way you wouldn't usually, hoping it will make Kyle jealous. Hoping it will make him spontaneously realize that he's been in love with you this whole time.

No such luck.

Kyle is a gentleman, making sure you're safe and comfortable and having a good time, but he doesn't pay you any special sort of attention, playing pool with Soap ("Call me Johnny") and not turning away the girl who sidles up next to him, asking him to teach her.

You maybe, possibly, definitely drink too much to try and soothe the ache in your heart.

Kyle and Pool Girl leave together when you're only two drinks deep and can convincingly act the part of "sober friend who is definitely fine with being abandoned for you to go fuck a stranger, Kyle, absolutely, I'm going home soon anyway." Soap-Call-Me-Johnny slides into the seat across from you and next to Ghost ("If you call me Simon I'll shoot you.") He starts trying to chat you up, and he's at least a lot more personable than his masked teammate, who has been sipping his pint and staring at you unflinchingly for the last half hour while you pine for Kyle from afar. You're not entirely sure why Ghost was observing you so intently, but if you weren't already well on your way to tipsy-town, you'd be severely creeped out. As it is, you figure he's trying to a) decide where he recognizes you from or b) make you so uncomfortable you leave. Or maybe work up the courage to hit on you. Unlikely, given he hasn't said a word to you this whole time since introductions were made, but not entirely impossible. Unfortunately for him, if that's what he's going for, you're not biting. The whole silent and mysterious schtick is so not your thing.

Johnny, on the other hand, is definitely trying to hook up. He is not subtle about it at all, despite his superior officer being right next to him. But he, too, is not your type—charming and handsome, certainly, but too... energetic. You prefer a proper, refined gentleman—it's why you'd fallen for Kyle—and while Ghost is stoically silent, Johnny talks so much you can barely get a word in edgewise.

You think about giving Johnny some friendly advice that he should... not talk less, but perhaps leave openings for other people to respond. But based on the way Ghost is hanging off every one of Johnny's words, you're pretty sure you'd get a knife to the gut for your trouble.

Those two end up heading out together a while later, leaving you alone with Kyle's Captain—Price, you think. It's a bit hard to remember with how fuzzy your head has gotten, and Probably-Price seems to notice how done in you are just from a single look.

"Going to have to have a talk with Kyle about leaving a woman alone and vulnerable like this," he says as he gently loosens the death grip you have on the stem of your empty cocktail glass. You blink sluggishly at him, wondering if he's joking, but he seems genuinely upset on your behalf—lips pursed beneath his mustache, a furrow between his bushy brows, blue eyes flinty. His eyes aren't beautiful like Kyle's—big and deep and brown like a well-steeped cup of tea, or an expensive mahogany table, you can never decide which shade is closer—but you find yourself staring at them anyway.

In the dim lighting of the pub, they're more grey than blue, hooded and adorned with fine wrinkles at the edges, ones you didn't notice earlier but do now that you're up close. You know he's older than Kyle—and thus yourself—by a fair few years, and you feel a bit like a misbehaving child being caught out by their father.

"Sorry," you murmur, looking down at the table as you're suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to cry. You blink again to try and keep the tears at bay, but a sniffle escapes. Embarrassed and dizzy, you lay your head on the table with a groan.

"Didn't— didn't mean to so— to dr— to get so. Drunk," you finally manage to get out, words halting and slurred. Your embarrassment only grows worse at how badly you stumble through a single sentence.

"S'alright, love," Kyle's captain says, laying a comforting hand on your upper back and rubbing slow circles on it. It's grounding, and you focus on his touch, trying to still the spinning in your head. After a moment, he speaks again. "Let's get you home, hmm?"

You nod, peeling yourself off the table and trying to hop down from the raised booth. You realize what a stupid idea that is a second later when your spindly heels fail to hold up your drunken, uncoordinated weight—so much for having a model's grace—and with an undignified yelp, you face plant onto the floor.

Or you would, if Kyle's captain doesn't catch you the second you stumble, his big, warm hands landing on your waist as he redirects you to fall into him instead.

"Easy now," he says, deep voice rumbling in his chest—which is quite broad and solid, but not uncomfortably hard like the male models you usually work with—beneath your ear. You shiver at the feeling of the vibrations traveling across your skin, and it takes you a moment to realize you're turned on by it. You cringe at yourself, taking a deep breath to try and clear your mind so you'll stop acting so sloppy—but instead, you just get a deep whiff of Price's scent. That only makes your situation worse, because he smells good—like some sort of spicy cigar smoke, the top shelf whiskey he'd been sipping on, and good old English oak.

"You smell nice," you tell him, because you're drunk and have zero filter left. The regret is instant when you realize what you've said, but Price doesn't seem to mind, based on the low chuckle that escapes him.

"Thank you, darling," he says, and you can hear the amusement in his voice. At least one of you is having fun.

Kyle's probably having lots of fun with Pool Girl, a voice in your head reminds you none too kindly, and the tears escape before you can stop them this time.

A calloused thumb wipes the salty trails away, and Price grips your chin gently, tilting your face up towards him.

“What’s all this for, then?” He asks, and just like before, he truly seems to care. It’s that that makes you crack, you think. That and the alcohol.

“I— I got all dr-dr-dressed up for— for him and he— he w-went home with P-Pool Girl!” You sob, lips quivering and shoulders shaking. You probably have snot dripping down your face. Good lord, you’re a mess. You’re a mess and you’re probably embarrassing Kyle in front of his Captain—what if Price tells him how sloppy you’d gotten and Kyle never wants to see you again? Suddenly desperate, you clutch onto the man’s sweater-jacket, fingers twisting into the fabric as you stare at him with big, panicked eyes. “P-please don’t— don’t tell him or— or m-make him scrub the— um, the— the loos!”

“Oh, he’ll be on latrine duty for months, alright,” Price says darkly, and you wail. Loudly. Price immediately tucks your face into his neck to muffle the sound, petting your hair as he tries to calm you down. “Shhh, lovie, s'alright. You haven’t done anything wrong. M’gonna take you home now, yeah? Can you tell me where your place is?”

Through your tears, you tell him the address of the little flat you share with your roommate. You’re not well known enough yet in the modelling industry to get paid the big bucks, so you’re stuck with the other girl for now, no matter how nasty she can be.

You don’t remember most of the drive there—you think you must have fallen asleep at some point—but you come back to yourself when Price gently shakes you awake after parking in front of your building. He walks you to the door, putting up with you hanging off his arm like a limpet so you don’t fall again. There’s another blank stretch in your memory, but then you’re lying in bed, still in the outfit you had spent so much time picking out tonight, only for Kyle to barely look at you twice. You groan in embarrassment, pulling your legs up to your chest so you can curl into a ball and hide from the world—or you try to, but you abruptly realize someone is holding onto one of your feet. You shriek in fear, sitting up sharply—and then promptly plop back down when you’re hit over the head with vertigo so bad you almost lose your three (four?) espresso martinis and… however many shots you had. It’s definitely not good that you can’t recall, but at least you don’t have work tomorrow.

You suddenly remember that there is someone in your room and they are holding your foot hostage, so you do the only thing that you can think of in that situation—you try to kick them. From the loud oof you hear, you’re successful, and you feel momentary pride that you’ve wounded your would-be attacker—at least until he speaks.

“S’a strong kick you got there, love. Kyle teach you that?”

“Oh fuck,” you blurt out, because you recognize that voice. It’s Kyle’s captain. The man you’d confessed your crush on his subordinate to, cried all over, and made take you home. And now he’s here, in your room… holding your foot. For some reason. Drunkenly, you ask for clarification. “Why are you trying to steal my foot?”

There’s silence, and then a loud, booming laugh. He lets go of your foot, standing up so you can see the pair of heels he’s holding in his hands. Your heels. That you had been wearing. He was taking them off of you. To steal them.

“Wait, don’t— don’t take those, those are my— my, um. Lou— Loobtons. Loooobtons. Loo-ee-batons? Lubes. Um. My red bottoms… don’t take them. Please?”

“Nice as they are, darling, I’ve no need for high heels,” Price says, still chuckling, and sets the heels down the shoe rack next to your closet. “I’m not takin’ ‘em. Just didn’t want you getting your bed dirty.”

“Oh,” you say, blinking several times in a row, and then nodding. “Right… that— that makes sense. Yeah.”

“Yeah,” Price echoes, and his face is kind of blurry because there’s two of him and you’re not sure which one to focus on, but you think he’s smiling. You wish you could see it better—he probably has a really nice smile. The two Prices move closer, leaning over you and turning you on your side.

“Um,” you say, because what else are you supposed to do in this situation? It’s starting to feel like all those anti-rape ads you always see. “Do I need to kick you again?”

Rather than be offended, Price just chuckles again, and you can’t help but calm a little bit at the sound of it. When he pulls a blanket over you rather than climb into bed behind you, you relax fully.

“Oh,” you repeat. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he tells you, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear. “And if you ever feel afraid like that, trust your gut. Better to overreact and be wrong than underreact and face the consequences.”

Price’s voice is darker now, harder, and you think you’re seeing a glimpse of the man that Kyle must know. It’s a bit intimidating, but also kind of hot, and you nod obediently. It’s good advice, after all.

“Thank you for helping me,” you say quietly. You may be drunk, but you still have manners. “You’re really nice, Mr. Price.”

A beat, and then you giggle at the unintentional rhyme, finding it hilarious in your drunken state.

“Call me John,” Price says, pulling up the blanket a little more when you shiver, so it’s right under your chin.

“Okay, John,” you agree easily, and then close your eyes. You’re exhausted, and heartbroken but trying not to think about it, and still really dizzy. Sleep sounds like exactly what you need right now. “Night night.”

“Goodnight, love,” John answers. You hear his footsteps walking away, but you’re out before he even reaches the door.

[literaryavenger]

A thought that breaks my heart: imagine Bucky that eats like he doesn’t know where his next meal will be coming from because, for the longest time, he didn’t. 

But nobody on the team knows because he never eats with them.

All it took was some absentminded comment from Sam the first time Bucky ate with him and Steve about how Bucky ate his hamburger in like 5 seconds. Sam didn’t really mean anything by it, he was just joking around, but Bucky got incredibly self-conscious about the way he eats and stopped eating in front of everybody, Steve included.

Every time the team was eating together, he’d say he wasn’t hungry or make up some excuse to get out of it but even if he couldn’t, he’d eat the bare minimum only to then sneak into the kitchen later when it was empty, make more food and then eat it in his room. 

You yourself only joined the Avengers recently, so you’ve never seen Bucky during meals with the whole team. 

But you don’t think too much of it, he always says he doesn’t need to eat as much which is a little weird because Steve is also a supersoldier and eats three times as much food as everybody else because of his faster metabolism, but Bucky’s serum was made by Hydra so, like everybody else, you just assume it allows him to operate with less need for sustenance which would make him a more efficient soldier. 

But, being a person that likes to observe more than you like to talk, you start noticing small things about Bucky that no one else seems to.

It all started when he let a compliment slip about some cookies that you made for the team, which was weird because after the lunch where you all ate them as dessert, which Bucky was once again absent from, the rest of them disappeared from the kitchen less than an hour later. You assumed it was Sam, Steve, Clint and Thor since all of them always finish the things you bake, but clearly it was Bucky.

So, he does eat. You start noticing more and more Bucky sneaking around the Compound here and there and one day you can’t help but give into the curiosity and follow him to the kitchen where you see him making himself food and then sneak back to his room. 

You don’t tell anybody though, or even bring it up with the man himself, instead you start saving food from meals so Bucky won’t have to make it himself and leave it out for him with notes so he’ll know they’re for him and nobody else will eat them. 

It takes Bucky a little bit to figure out who’s doing it, but when he finds out it’s not Steve like he suspected but you, the pretty newbie that he’s barely even talked to since you joined, to say he’s surprised is an understatement. 

But he can’t bring himself to confront you about it because he knows it’ll open up a whole can of worms about his eating habits and he’s too self-conscious about that to bring it up, so instead he starts leaving notes back every time he takes the food, addressed to you.

Now imagine this goes on for weeks, maybe months even, until one day Bucky builds up the courage to show up at one of the team meals and acts as casually as he can manage as he sits down and starts to eat. Nobody says anything or even acknowledges his unusual presence because, unbeknownst to Bucky, you’ve scolded everybody that tried to bring up Bucky’s eating habits over the last few months. 

When you join the table after Bucky, as soon as you notice him all you do is grin and sit down before you start eating your own food. This is the first time Bucky’s ever actually seen you eat and his eyes widen when he sees you eat like a prisoner sentenced to death, but nobody else seems surprised or even that bothered. The entire team is used to it by now and they couldn’t care less, much to Bucky’s surprise.

“You… Always eat like that?” Bucky asks quietly before he can stop himself, worried about offending you the second the words leave his mouth.

But, once again, much to his surprise, you look up at him with a smile and nod unapologetically. “Yeah, my dad always used to say ‘Whatever you do, do it a hundred percent.’ That means when you work, work. When you laugh, laugh. And when you eat… Eat like it’s your last meal.”

Bucky looks at you with a blank expression for all of five seconds before his face breaks into a goofy grin. Not only did he already find you pretty and adorable, but after hearing you say that he thinks you’re the most attractive woman he’s ever known, even if you’re currently stuffing your face like there’s no tomorrow.

Imagine little by little Bucky starts feeling more and more comfortable eating around others, until eventually he joins every meal the team has together. And, when they’re all doing their own thing, he still asks you to have lunch or dinner with him and the two of you crackle at the other eating like a pig, not one hint of shame in either of you.

Anyway, just a thought.

[ozzgin]

I was 100% thinking of the Shinsengumi when the brainrot struck, but let us assume a more generic, unnamed circumstance for this. Random, uh, elite group of swordsmen working for the shogunate in the Edo period. Here's the awkward, horny himbo I had previously mentioned. Content: female reader, historical setting, crossdressing, NSFW

Yandere!Captain commands his group with an iron grip. Many people in the Capital know his name, whether it's fellow warriors or petty merchants, and not without reason. His unmatched skill with a sword had even reached the ears of the court, and he was quickly appointed as the head of a newly formed group of samurai meant to maintain order in the city.

As if keeping hot-blooded thugs under control wasn't enough, he is now stuck with an even bigger issue: you.

"We can't have women in here", he declares with a grimace.

"I can pretend", you counter stubbornly, pulling your hakama pants up by the sash, almost in an act of defiance. "In fact, I don't see any woman here. I came to apply."

Yandere!Captain’s reputation does not only revolve around his intimidating strength. Among his underlings, he is known for being completely and utterly uninterested when it comes to women. Will he join his group for drinks after a long day of work? Absolutely. But that’s where the fun stops. When the others begin to slip away with smiling courtesans, he remains at the table with a somber countenance. It is a running joke that nothing can deter this man from his duty.

Thus, your presence at the headquarters should make no difference. He had to begrudgingly accept that you spoke the truth when you'd said you can handle a sword. It's not uncommon for women to keep a small tanto underneath their obi for additional protection, but your knowledge doesn't stop there. You arrived with your own katana and backup wakizashi, swiftly proving their worth upon your first city round when you slashed the arm off a street hooligan.

Well, that's one less worry for the captain. Except, to his great shame, it's not as simple as that. He is the only one aware of your secret, which means that he is the only one available outside of working hours. He was terrified to discover the hesitation in his hands when bandaging your ribs after a stabbing incident, or the halt in his step when he happened to find you switching to a night gown. Oh, how deplorable! Have his morals crumbled into nothing? His latest perverted thought nearly caused him to draw a blade across his stomach.

It is with this faltering confidence that he greets you before the bath one evening.

“You don’t have to do this”, you tell him. "I can wait until you're done."

His struggles haven't escaped your observant eye. You were initially amused by his rather obvious awkwardness; then, a certain idea insidiously made its way into your mind, impossibly tempting: for how long could he keep this façade?

You find yourself going out of your way just to tease your poor captain, perhaps secretly hoping he'll soon break down and give in to his yearning.

“They will become suspicious if you never join us. I do not care for your nudity. Undress at ease”, he says, throwing away his own towel and lowering himself into the hot water. “Get in whenever you want.”

If he insists.

You nonchalantly follow suit, sitting across from him with your arms resting against the rocky edge of the hot spring. You can tell his eyes have wandered involuntarily. His face is red, and he’s wearing a humiliated frown.

“You’re awfully quiet, Sir.”

His lips are pursed indeed. The tall man shuffles briefly, avoiding your gaze. A smirk crosses your features as you decide to approach him.

"In fact, I'd go as far as you say that you're in dire need of help."

To your surprise, he doesn't protest when your hands stray to his lower half, feeling up and down his erection. The small grunts escaping his mouth encourage you to pick up the pace, now equally aroused.

Soon, you feel his heavy arm wrapping around your waist, forcefully throwing you out of the water and onto the cold ground. You open your mouth to complain, but it's quickly shut back by his hot lips, suckling and biting in a desperate hunger to have you.

“It’s improper for a subordinate to take the lead”, he finally says in a low, breaking voice.

He can only hope no one else decides to use the hot springs, though that’s as far as his concern currently goes. He’s much too preoccupied with other pressing matters, holding onto your folded legs for support as he thrusts into you in a depraved, delirious need. His movements are jerky and erratic, with an almost predatory glimmer in his eyes. You wonder how often he imagined this happening. All of his shame and guilt, coming undone at once.

Days later, during one of the hangouts, you find him whispering to one of the courtesans.

“What, you suddenly have a taste for women now?” you question discreetly, unable to hold your tongue.

You’d hoped to be on the receiving end of any future lust-driven gestures from the captain, not some common worker.

He appears to hesitate, twiddling his thumbs and glancing away.

“I was just…asking how you properly please a woman”, he finally confesses.

If he’s going to continue fucking his subordinate behind everyone’s back, he may as well do a good job while at it.

[More Original Works] | [Yan!Swordsman Concept]

[illbegottenfaith]

world-endingly, soul-crushingly awful (a so alright, cool, whatever inspired fic)

theo doesn't realise this is NOT how best friends normally feel (bsf!theo nott x reader)

a/n - I was kind of double-minded about writing them as enemies or best friends but I decided to go for something Ive written less of so :)) this is one of my sillier ideas that I came up with on a whim but idk idk its just cute adjhcfsjdlc

tropes/warnings - bsf!theo, fluff, oblivious theo, someone hit him over the head with a frying pan level of oblivious, crack/comedy fic (very mildly tho)

word count - 2.8k

taglist - @kandralice @justme989898 @iamheretoread1234 @allie-sturns @hzdhrtss @friedfreyfries @bushnellswife @rose-of-the-grave @thaliashifts @pariahsparadise @babene-e @fratbrochrisgf @user089167

“You’re gonna have to send me an owl the second you reach,” Theo said, folding one of your sweaters.

“You act like Ilvermorny is on another planet,” you teased, nudging his shoulder with yours. You tossed the folded sweater onto a pile of other clothes on your trunk. “It’s just America.”

Mattheo, sprawled on your bed, scoffed audibly.

“Just America, she says,” Mattheo muttered to Ivy, who sat cross-legged beside him. “As if that’s not an entire ocean away.”

Ivy, who had been observing Theo with sharp, knowing eyes, only sighed.

“It’s great though, isn't it? That she’s going? I mean, six months is practically nothing.”

Mattheo grunted. “Yeah. Practically nothing.” His tone made it very clear that six months was hardly nothing.

Theo, as usual, didn’t seem to pick up on any of the loaded implications lacing their words. He simply nodded, entirely absorbed in folding a long-sleeved shirt of yours.

“Yeah, it’s great. She’s been wanting this for ages.”

Ivy gave Mattheo a desperate look. He scoffed exasperatedly.

Theo had always been a quiet sort of stubborn - and not just the wilful kind. Oftentimes, he could be so utterly unaware of his own emotions that trying to drag them out would be like trying to wrought blood from a stone. But even this was stretching it.

For as long as you and Theo had been friends, it had been apparent to everyone but the two of you that there was something just a little too intense about the way you gravitated toward each other. Your conversations always held a rhythm no one else could quite fall into, one which had the two of you joined at the hip for years.

Since you were in your fifth year, it had been your dream to attend a six-month student exchange program with Ilvermony. With all the effort you had poured into your application, your acceptance came to the surprise of no one but you. Naturally, your friends were plenty happy for you, but Theo was positively ecstatic. Hardly the excitable type, Mattheo had never seen him smile that wide. Every moment since, he had been swept up in helping you prepare for your visit.

One unfortunate detail was that the exchange program spanned your final semester at Hogwarts. That was, the next time anyone would be seeing you would be at graduation. Your friends had expected him to take the news hard. After all, it wasn't every day that one of your closest friends moved halfway across the world. But he didn't. Theo had been surprisingly calm as he helped you coordinate your preparation efforts with a readiness that was hard to fake.

But that was no matter. With how involved Theo was in helping you plan your visit, the realisation would have to kick in eventually. And when it did, they would be ready to comfort him with open arms.

It was now a week away from your departure. Theo still hadn't shed a tear or said a word about how he really felt about you leaving. Your friends had spent months trying to hint to him to confess his feelings - an impossible task when he didn't seem to even be aware of them.

Mattheo swore he had tried whispering to Theo in his sleep for a couple of nights, trying to lull him with some kind of subliminal messaging, but to no avail. All he got was some bleary-eyed swearing and a pillow to the face. But that was beyond the point: desperate times called for desperate measures, and there was nothing more desperate than an intervention.

Ivy and Mattheo walked into the Slytherin common room, where Theo was flipping through a book. Next to him sat a pile of your woollens that he had been darning over the past couple of days.

Ivy elbowed Mattheo in the ribs. After some not-so-subtle glaring from her, Mattheo grudgingly asked Theo about them. From there, the conversation easily shifted to your upcoming trip. As always, Theo's voice was smooth and pleasant, as if he really couldn't be happier for you.

“Theo,” Ivy began, voice full of forced patience, “isn’t there anything you’d like to say to Y/N before she leaves?”

Theo hesitated.

“… goodbye?”

Mattheo let out a long-suffering groan.

“She’s leaving the country. The goodbye is implicit.”

Theo glanced up from his book, brow furrowed.

“Erm, okay. Have a safe trip, then?”

Ivy exchanged a pointed look with Mattheo.

“No, no. Not exactly something so...generic. Something important. Something meaningful.”

"Oh." Theo looked away from intensely scrutinising Ivy's face, his eyes dropping back to his book. "Yeah. Probably. Maybe."

"Yeah?" Ivy perked up. This had been surprisingly easy. "Like what?"

Theo thought for a moment, then shrugged.

“Dunno. Something like…you’ll be the only ever one none before you ever were. I knew you before I knew the kind of person I wanted to be. And it's a sad thing to see your favourite person leave.”

Silence.

Ivy blinked. Mattheo’s mouth fell open slightly.

“...what the fuck, mate,” Mattheo breathed.

Theo frowned. “What?”

Ivy inhaled deeply.

“Theodore. Do you think that’s a...how shall I put this - a normal thing to say about a friend?”

Theo blinked.

“I mean… yeah?”

Mattheo let out an incredulous laugh. “No. No, it’s not.”

"Let me put it this way," Ivy said. "That's the kind of thing someone might say about a partner."

"She is my partner," Theo agreed. "Partner in crime, if you will. That, and we take Potions together."

"No, as in, like a - like a romantic partner."

Theo looked between the pair, as if he was only just starting to piece together the purpose of their visit. His lips twitched.

“Let me guess. You think I’m in love with her?”

Mattheo and Ivy exchanged glances. He crossed his arms.

“Yeah, actually. We do.”

Theo scoffed, leaning back in his chair. “That’s rich.”

Ivy sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Theo - ”

“No, really,” Theo cut in, still visibly amused. “That’s what this is about? You two are acting like I’m about to throw myself off the Astronomy Tower over this trip, because you think I’m in love with her?”

Mattheo narrowed his eyes. “You are upset she’s leaving.”

Theo shrugged. “I mean, sure, I’ll miss her. We'll all miss her. That’s normal.”

“Right,” Ivy said slowly, “because you’re been so normal about this."

"Haven't I?"

"You tell us, Theo. You’ve spent the last week hovering over her like a personal secretary, helping her pack, making sure she’s got every little thing - ”

“That’s called being a good friend!”

Mattheo groaned, visibly resisting the urge to thump the realisation into Theo.

“Okay. How about this - what if she started writing to some bloke at Ilvermorny instead of you?”

Theo raised an eyebrow. “She wouldn't.”

“But if she did?”

"But she wouldn't."

Theo opened his mouth, presumably to go on about what a ridiculous notion it was - then stopped. Paused. As though he was considering it. Ivy, who had been watching him testily, zeroed in on it.

“What?”

He remained silent.

"Answer the question, Nott."

Finally, Theo shook his head.

"Nothing. It'd be weird, that’s all.”

Mattheo and Ivy exchanged a knowing look.

“Right. Weird. Not world-endingly, soul-crushingly awful or anything,” Mattheo said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

Theo scoffed. “Oh, come off it. Just because I don’t want to lose my best friend to some random American - ”

“You don’t want to lose her,” Ivy echoed.

Theo frowned. “Obviously not.”

Ivy leaned in slightly, voice gentler now.

“Do you ever think about her with someone else?”

Theo hesitated. His fingers curled against his knee.

Ivy tilted her head. “Do you ever imagine it?”

His mind betrayed him instantly, shaping out a scene that had yet to happen - you, laughing at someone else’s joke, standing too close to someone else, snaking your hand down to someone else's for warmth -

He shut it down. He huffed.

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

"Sure, it doesn’t.”

Theo folded his arms.

“Fine. So I...like her. So what? You lot are acting like I’m going to be hopelessly lovesick with her gone.”

"Give it a week."

"Mattheo..."

"What? You know it's true."

Ivy shook her head, watching Theo’s expression closely.

“All we're saying is, you don’t have to say it’s love. But if it was, would it really be that surprising? Would it be the worst thing in the world, being in love with your best friend?”

Theo didn't know what to say. The longer he thought about it, the more horrifyingly obvious it became.

He thought about how his whole day felt off if he didn’t see you. How he understood your expressions like the back of his hand. How he noticed things about you that no one else did, like the way you drummed your fingers when you were thinking, or how you never remembered to bring a jacket, or how you always smelled like the same bloody soap.

And how his stomach twisted when he thought of you with someone that wasn't him.

Oh.

Oh, fuck.

Now that Theo had come to terms with it - now that he’d processed that yes, fine, maybe he was a little bit in love with you - he had a new problem.

He had no idea how to tell you.

Not for a lack of trying, bless him.

“I need to tell you something,” he said at breakfast one morning, voice entirely too serious for that time of day.

You blinked, mid-bite.

“Alright…?”

Theo inhaled. He could do this. He could so do this. He could totally be normal about this. He could.

“You should bring a raincoat.”

You frowned. “What?”

“For America,” he said quickly. “I read somewhere that Ilvermorny gets a lot of rain.”

You stared at him for a long second.

“You’re being weird.”

Theo sighed. “Forget it.”

He tried again a few days later, in the evening, when you were packing. He hovered awkwardly near your bed as you arranged your folded shirts in your trunk.

“You know,” he said, “there’s something I don’t think I’ve ever properly said to you.”

You grunted, continuing your attempt to compress a stack of shirts into the corner of your trunk. “Go on.”

Theo swallowed. His palms felt unreasonably clammy.

“I - ”

Say it. Just say it.

“I really think you should take that book on magical theory,” he blurted out instead.

Panting, you emerged from your trunk. You squinted up at him.

“Theo. I hate that book.”

“Oh. Right.”

You held out your hand. Like clockwork, Theo obliged, bending until his sticky forehead met the cool back of your hand.

"Warm, but not feverish," you concluded. He straightened. You were looking at him funny, eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Is there another reason why you haven't been making much sense these past few days?"

Theo laughed weakly. "Sorry. Don't know what came over me."

You didn't look convinced. “Are you sure you're alright?”

Theo swallowed, a lump in his throat.

“Yeah. Great. Never been better.”

His last attempt came when you were going over your packing list one last time, just a couple of days before your departure.

“You know,” he tried again, as you tapped your quill down the list, “I’ll probably miss you.”

You looked up and gave a brief smile. Theo ached with the misery that he would be losing it soon. “I’ll miss you too.”

Emboldened, he pressed on.

“And I think, uh, you’ve been - you are… different. Special.”

You nodded, like that was a perfectly normal thing to say.

“You too.”

Theo exhaled in relief. Maybe that was enough. Maybe that was -

“That’s what best friends are for, right?”

Theo froze.

A short scuffle sounded at the door. Mattheo, who had been eavesdropping, had hit his head on a particularly low beam.

“Merlin’s fucking beard.”

It was too late.

The platform was filled with a mist of steam and goodbyes. Your farewell party was only a foot away from the train doors. You were standing in front of him, hair littered with some stray confetti from your send-off, seconds away from boarding that train and leaving his life forever. Well, maybe not forever, but too long to ever recover from.

As you pulled him in for a last hug, Theo realised, this was it. This was what years of friendship was boiling down to. Did you even have any lasting impact on his life? Or years from now, would you unwillingly flit across his mind on the darkest, rainiest nights, a shadow of a memory of someone he knew way back when?

He wanted to tell you - really he did. But he had failed. It was all so frustratingly futile, wasn't it? He should’ve said something sooner. He should’ve made you understand. Now he had no one to blame but himself.

His grip on you tightened almost uncomfortably. You laughed, squirming in his hold, thinking it was one last inside joke for the two of you.

"Goodbye," he choked out. "Safe travels. Write, won't you?"

"'Course," you said. Or at least, tried to say through a mouthful of Theo's sweater.

As he finally pulled away, the words slipped from his lips

“You’ve ruined me, you know.”

The chatter on the platform seemed to quiet. All that Theo was aware of was the ceaseless churning of the crowds around you, the blood roaring in his ears and the curious little cleft that had appeared between your eyebrows. Ivy’s eyes widened. Mattheo held his breath.

You blinked.

“...what?”

"What?" Theo repeated back with an air of polite interest, feigning innocence.

"That thing you just said."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I've...I've what?"

Theo made a show of checking his watch as he stooped, reaching for your trunk. "You're going to miss your train."

To everyone's surprise, you yanked your trunk out of his reach. You stayed rooted in place, unmoving to Theo's attempts to cajole you onto the train.

"Nott, you tell me what you said right this instant or I'll - I'll cry. I swear, I'll start bawling on this platform in a minute if you don't hurry up and s-"

Theo’s stomach dropped.

"No, no, don't do that," he said hurriedly. “I - I just meant - ” He cast his eyes around frantically. Ivy and Mattheo were absolutely no help. “You’re, um. You’re different.”

You gave him a blank look. “Yeah. So?”

“No, I mean - really different.”

You nodded. “So are you.”

“No, but - you’re - ” He ran a hand through his hair. “I mean, it’s - ”

“This is painful to watch,” Mattheo muttered.

Ivy ignored him. “What's it going to take for him to just say it already?”

Theo exhaled sharply, forcing himself to look you in the eye.

“You’re not just my best friend. I don't think you ever have been.”

You were silent for a moment, face impassive, as if deciding how to respond.

"Teddy, that's crazy talk."

"Yeah?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well, what's so crazy about it?"

"We're friends. This is just what friends do, it's normal."

Theo laughed. It was entirely inappropriate for the situation, and you frowning at him s=certainly wasn't but now that most of his nervous energy had evaporated, it was as though he couldn't bring himself to stop.

"No," he said, in a strained voice. "This isn't normal for friends. Trust me, I should know."

You looked unimpressed.

"'Cause," he continued, still chuckling weakly, "if we're only friends, why does this feel so world-endingly, soul-crushingly awful?"

The steely look in your eye faded.

"I mean," you mumbled, looking a lot less certain now. "You're my favourite friend. Sue me."

But even as your lips formed the words, Theo could see the realisation clouding over your eyes. You tilted your head.

"More than friends," you breathed.

Theo watched you uncertainly test how the words felt on your tongue.

"Yeah."

You shook your head.

"I can't believe you figured it out before me."

A corner of Theo's lip quirked upwards.

"Told you. I'm always one step ahead of you."

"Ivy put you up to this, didn't she?"

Theo grinned, and you responded in the same, infectious grin that he had. Your favourite, infectious grin.

"So, now what do we do?"

Theo held out his hand. You took it. It was the first time the familiar action registered as anything other than platonic in his head.

"I think," Theo said, "you have a train to catch."

[neoplatinum]

I'D RATHER LIE | MERET 'MANON' BANNERMAN

synopsis: reader and manon are caught in a arrangement of being more than just members but less than lovers, their members catch on.

pairing: manon x 7th-member!reader

tags: angst, fluff, smut, members w benefits, top!reader, bottom!manon, bathroom sex, car sex, making out, hickeys, cunnilingus, fingering, 7th!member!reader, katseye members, mentions of a man (el oh el)

wc: 5.9k

"i'd rather lie than to lose you, girl"

hidden behind closed doors and tucked away bedrooms, you were caught under the trance of a woman whose feelings were as fleeting as a thought. the only permanence and constant is her autonomy.

it really was born out of pure coincidence that you found yourself knowing more than just her, but also the way she kisses you. the softness of her skin, the quiet noises in the dead of the night, and even the way her eyes glaze over when you’re in too deep.

there was always the threat of being found out by the public. if word got out that two katseye members were in a romantic relationship, that would spell out the end of the group. so you two kept the arrangement to yourselves. carrying all the memories and weight of your actions. they were locked up in a deep corner of your heart and soul.

in front of cameras you’re plenty pleasant, playing the role of the more quiet and reserved member, cracking rare jokes that had the members laughing until their stomach hurted. but you never wanted to display a weakness to a very special member that had landed her way into your heart. 

so you often created a fake distance with her, sitting away from her during interviews or group lives. it was all a farce, created to weakly contain the deep feelings tucked away, from everyone, and from her too. 

knowing that you will always feel more for her than she could ever feel for you had your heart aching for months. you try not to notice the closeness that’s so evident with other members, a closeness that you long for. you stuck closely with sophia instead, opting to join her lives instead of manon’s. it was a fool-proof way to keep the public from seeing you two as anything other than close friends.

you fought your feelings as hard as you could, letting your heart rip into shreds for the crumbs of attention that you could receive when behind closed doors.

all of that thinly-veiled confidence in your plan, slowly came crashing down.

the first to notice was sophia.

it was obvious to everyone and especially sophia that you were more reserved, a quietness about you that wasn’t tainted with awkwardness. rather just comfort in the silence and peace of being truly yourself. so when sophia caught you staring a little too long at manon’s stage videos during rehearsals, she noted that. 

she also noted that you would often give little huffs of annoyance whenever you two were in the same room together.

one time she walked into the kitchen, hoping to grab a quick fruit to snack on. instead she felt she walked into an old western standoff. both of your bodies angled away from each other, but gazes stuck on each other. 

she felt like she just caught herself between two worlds, nothing other than the energy made her feel so caught, you two were perfectly normal. your hands were dripping with soapy water and the faucet was running. manon took a bite of her sandwich while saying nothing to you, just staring back as you were to her. when manon spotted sophia, she offered you half of her sandwich before disappearing into her room. you stood there, watching her until her figure retreated and resumed cleaning dishes. 

sophia swears she felt the temperature drop from how odd that situation was. 

“are you okay?” sophia said as she grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl. eyes keenly observing the way your hands were shaking as you continued rinsing plates.

“yes, are you?” you placed another plate onto the drying rack, casting your eyes downward. you continued to busy your hands with other dirty dishes, hoping that sophia would drop whatever she thought about that interaction.

“i'm good, here for some fruit.” sophia smiles at you, still observing the way you refuse to make eye contact with her. 

“the apples are really good, do you want me to cut it up for you?”

she smiles at that, grabbing a small knife, and slowly carving the apple skin off. handing you a small piece before leaving the kitchen once more. you eat the apple piece slowly, staring at the half sandwich that manon left for you.

–

“where’s manon?” sophia asked to the group. 

“probably overslept.” you offer back. drinking more water and capping it before going back to practice more of the dance you were having trouble getting down. sophia’s dialing manon and you try not to focus on that. rather continuing to monitor yourself in the mirror. 

sophia groans and looks at you.

“she’s not picking up, can you go get her?” sophia asks, everyone has their eyes on you, so you reluctantly agree. a growing uneasy feeling as you grab your phone and hoodie. speeding off the lot and straight back to the katseye house. 

when you get to her room, you give yourself a moment to collect yourself before knocking on her door.

“manon?” you ask quietly, waiting for a response. when you get none, you turn the knob, opening the room to a very asleep manon. her hair splayed over her pillow. soft breathing sounds as you walk closer to her.

this was always your weakness, the way she looks like you could wake up next to her for the rest of your life. it’s in the way that she curls into her side, the relaxed face. you wish you could stay whenever you two hooked up, but knowing the after was never going to be yours made you leave before you could fall too deep (you already did).

“manon, wake up.” you softly whisper to her, gently brushing the hair out of her face. her face leans into your touch and you try not to lose your focus. 

she smiles a bit, knowing exactly who’s touching her face.

“no…five more minutes, i swear.” she says. trying her hardest to turn her body the other way. you huff a bit before cradling her face with both hands.

“manon, you’re late for practice, and you know how sophia gets when any of us are late.” you speak to her gently, watching the way she continues to smile with bliss.

you ignore the thumping in your chest when she grabs your hand and pulls it away from her face. only to intertwine her fingers with yours. then her eyes completely open.

“no, come cuddle.” with a swift hook of a leg she drags you into her bed. your back hitting the mattress, and feeling the wind knocked out of you.

“oof.” you groan as you try to get your breathing back, feeling a bit annoyed as manon grabs onto you. her leg wrapped over you and her hands slowly moving against your stomach. 

she stares up at you, watching the way you refuse to make eye contact with her. her hand slowing when she feels your heart thumping in your chest. she smiles as she pulls herself closer. 

you let yourself get pulled into cuddling her for longer. leading you into a quick dissent into messy hands and even messier kisses. the responsibilities of being a global girl group member falls to the back of your mind when you hear her calls for you. 

until you get a call from sophia, asking about your whereabouts. soon you’re speeding down the freeway with manon giggling in the passenger seat, adjusting her jewelry in your car’s sun visor.

when you arrive, manon apologizes for oversleeping, but deep inside your heart you know she doesn’t feel bad at all. 

sophia doesn’t mistake the sight of a hickey just tucked under manon’s top.

–

then daniela noticed.

it was a saturday night, and daniela found herself invited to a house party up in the hills. hearing the news, manon begged to join the party, and then in tow lara joined as well.

you were dragged in as DD (no one but manon knows how you were convinced to do so). so you were driving up the hills with the chaos of three other girls, loudly screaming songs from your sound system. no one questions that manon always gets passenger seat in your car.

dropping the keys to your 1969 mustang was less than enjoyable, you just hoped the bright eyed 20 year old valet would not crash your car. walking into a larger than life mansion, you scanned for some soda, something to at least keep you busy until you get that text from daniela that the night is over.

when you finally land yourself a drink, your eyes are glued onto manon, body moving within the crowd. finding a couple of friends that you knew as well. happily chatting them up with delight in her eyes. you can’t be bothered knowing that all you want is to steal manon from the room and do more than friendly things to her.

it’s in the way that she chooses to seek out her happiness away from you, and in the same way you choose tonight you’ll try and forget those brown eyes that haunt you in your every waking moment.

you're walking straight for a girl that’s surrounded by a group of her friends.

“hi sweetheart, want to dance?” you put on your most charming smile, a dangerous game that you swore off years ago, way before you met manon. she gives back a smile, one that’s a little too eager. one that lets you know you won’t return her calls if she gets your number.

soon you’re caught up with a girl that’s everything other than the girl your heart aches for. her hair is too fine, she doesn’t fit against your torso like how she does. her eyes are too light to even be comparable to the ones you love gazing into.

her kisses are too fast, the eagerness kills your mood. just eagerness for eagerness’ sake. you want the passion, the intensity behind the emotions. but you push that need down, you’re here to have as much fun as you can without holding yourself back.

as the night goes on, more people are trickling onto the dance floor. you try your best not to notice how your members are shocked by your actions. the way you’re touching up on this random girl could make headlines tomorrow that could send all of your careers into a dumpster fire. 

daniela’s about to step in, ready to grab you from the dancefloor, when she’s beat by manon. a determination in her step that couldn’t be matched. manon’s grabbing you by the arms before lara could even shout her name. 

the sleeves of your jackets tugged you away from the girl, your eyes are a little blurry and you almost lose your footing. 

“manon, let me go!” you’re shouting at the girl gripping your jacket. a small light of anger erupting in your stomach when she continues dragging you down the hallway into a bathroom. she slams the door shut and locks you two inside. you stare at her, anger continuing to boil within you.

“what the fuck was that?” your anger is almost tipping, here you are trying to forget the very girl that’s in front of you.

“i could ask you the same thing, what the fuck. was. THAT?” her anger is pouring out too. the way she crosses her arms and glares right back at you. the sparkly sequin dress catching under the light is almost as distracting as the glossy dark red lipstick painting her lips.

“i was having fun, what’s it to you?” you scoff, sitting down on the toilet. you hold her gaze, staring right back into her soul. 

she chuckles low, her eyes have lowered to near slits as she walks up to you.

“that fun you’re searching for…” she guides one of your hands right down her stomach, your gaze following like an obedient dog, “is right here.” 

you’re not letting the warmness of her skin get to you. until she pushes your chin up. the way she gazes into you is far too much for now, you pull back from her, watching the way her eyes go dark with anger. 

“you had no right pulling that out there.” you stand up, backing her up slowly until her back hits the sink.

“and you do? kissing her like that?”

“lucky for you, i’ll play your game.” you roughly grab onto her dress, diving for a kiss that’s spelling more than just the eagerness for her. your soul reaching out for hers as you move her up onto the sink. arms wrapped around you like you’re two pieces born to be molded together.

you’re reaching further into her dress when she roughly pushes your jacket off you. 

“get this off. now.” you’re practically ripping off the jacket when she’s decided now’s the perfect time to watch your tattoos under the light. her eyes are zero-ed in on you. you hotly continue to kiss her as your hands wander. slipping off the straps to her dress like they were a mistake.

your eyes are zooming onto your next target, pulling her more towards you, grabbing her waist before dropping to your knees. you keep your hand on her at all times, feeling the way she grabs onto your hair when you push her dress up. a lazy smile on her face when you look up at her.

you give her a small kiss on her inner thigh, eyes gleaming with amusement as she realizes you’re not moving another inch.

“don’t piss me off.” she growls at you, her lazy smile replaced with a deep frown. you smirk once again at her, using her thighs as leverage, balancing yourself before kissing her further, more kisses near her heat, but never where she wants it most. you’re tempted to keep playing with her, until she pushes your head towards where she needs the attention the most.

the tension is all in your neck as you continue to lay short licks around her. slowly getting her louder and louder, as you finally give her bud a lick. a tantalizing one at that, slowly dropping it near her hole. she lets out a gasp at the sudden prodding. 

you go back to her bud, giving it more desperate licks and digging your fingers into her thighs. a feeling of desperation is growing as she continues to moan your name inside of this bathroom. her hand is gripping onto your hair and pulling like a madman. 

before you know it, she’s pulling you up by your hair. your eyes finding hers before devouring her lips once more, the messiness displayed in the fogged up mirror, handprints on the glass. and you’re pushing her dress up further. finally pulling off her panties in one quick swipe.

her lips continue to find yours, arms tightly looped around your neck as you ruin her further and further.

“inside now.” she’s angry and bothered, her lips attach onto your neck while you enter her. a low moan in the back of her throat erupting just to be perfectly heard right by your ear. “move.”

“patience, darling.” you smirk further, loving the sensation of her against your neck. feeling the way she’s gripping onto you, and trying her best to move on top of this sink.

you chuckle a bit before going right back to what you were doing. hands rubbing up and down her side, fingers reaching into her in just the way she loves it. she continues to attack the side of your neck downwards to your chest.

you’re loving the feeling of desperation, the shaking, the rushed kisses, the sudden reminders to breathe when you move in that one area she loves. almost like a trance, she’s tossed her head back, eyes hiding behind closed eyes that are relishing in the feeling of being around you.

“come on baby, come for me.” her rushed breaths are driving you crazy, the way she tries to grind onto your fingers, making you feel like you’ve reached nirvana. her legs are starting to shake in that way that lets you know she’s nearing her peak.

you latch onto one of her tits and flick it, suckling it before pushing it back out with your tongue. your other hand moving towards her clit, rubbing it in just the same tempo that you’re moving with her. you’re curling your fingers upwards, feeling the pads of your fingers hit that golden spot, and she’s whining against you.

“fuck. fuck. fuck, i’m cumming,” holding onto you as an anchor as you watch her fall apart, legs shaking, breaths heavy as if she’s just danced for an hour. the way she mouths your name silently, letting the waves of her feelings expand and buzz within her.

you’re reminded why you love this so damn much. you want to be the only one that can pull this side of her out. 

and damn it, you need to be the only one.

“it’s okay, i’m not leaving.” you whisper to her as you slowly remove your fingers. a gentle reminder that you’ll always stay with her, with her lowest and her highest moments.

three minutes later lara’s banging on the door like she’s the feds. you quickly pull manon together while she’s still recovering from her dazed state. 

daniela doesn’t mention how your jacket is draped over manon’s poorly covered up dress. nor does she mention how you have lipstick stains still covering your mouth that you’ve poorly wiped off.

-

in two weeks time, the next to notice is lara. it was a quick slip of the mouth but she’s always been good at fact checking you. it’s apparent in the way you always go to her for debates on the more philosophical topics that keeps your mind spinning.

“you stole my milkshake.” lara says as she opens the fridge, you continue to clean down the sink and ignore her comment.

“i said, you stole my milkshake.” lara closes the fridge and stares at you.

“i didn’t steal it.” you state while wringing out the towel you’ve been using the clean the kitchen. with another wipe of the counter, lara gets in your space.

“yeah? then where is it?” she asks, catching you off-balance. seeing the way your eyes expand. she pokes your side with your non-response.

“manon’s room.” you say. moving yourself away from lara. she continues to eye you, watching the way you continue to wipe the same spot down. she leaves for manon’s room, quick strides down the hallway. in a quick turn, she find’s manon at her desk, playing with makeup. 

“manon, you stole my milkshake?” lara’s eyes widen when she sees it on her nightstand.

“i…did no such thing.” she pulls her best puppy dog eyes and notices the cup on her nightstand. lara’s eyes are following hers and it lands on the exact cup of milkshake she was saving for this afternoon.

“then what is this?” lara’s lifting the cup and shaking it in manon’s face. the emptiness of the cup isn’t lost on her. 

“that’s…um, someone’s milkshake.” manon nods to herself, quite proud of her evasiveness.

“yeah, mine’s.” lara scoffs and throws the cup into the nearest trash can. manon can only giggle and whistle as she turns back to her makeup. lara’s getting more suspicious, manon isn’t one to drink milkshakes. 

“why are you drinking my milkshake?” lara sits on manon’s bed, looking around the room.

“i didn’t, you-know-who did.” manon says.

“i thought you stopped hooking up with him?” this is news to lara, she didn’t know manon was still hooking up with him since they broke off the arrangement months ago.

“yeah, um, he came over last night.” now lara’s more than confused, how do you know that the milkshake is in manon’s room. lara was sure she didn’t see anyone come into the house last night.

“really?” lara offers back mindlessly, watching the way manon continues to fiddle with her makeup, a quick hm giving lara all she needed to know. manon’s always been a horrible liar, a dead giveaway when she doesn’t make eye contact.

and then lara spots it, in the very corner of manon’s bed is your favorite beanie, the one you never lend to anyone, not even daniela when she’s having her worst hair days. 

“interesting. don’t steal my milkshakes anymore.” lara says, grabbing onto your beanie and exiting the room, walking straight for you.

“you left your beanie in manon’s room.” lara says neutrally, dropping it into your hands. you have half the mind to offer a thank you, but you knew you’ve been found out, or at least that’s what lara’s eyes are telling you. she gives you a smile before exiting the kitchen once more.

“shit.” you eye the beanie.

–

then yoonchae noticed, sweet yoonchae who had no reason to believe that two of her members were hooking up. she had been requested by manon to steal your car keys. the car keys that you kept on you at all times. but you would never guess that sweet yoonchae would take it. thus here’s yoonchae ready to raid your room all for a promise of in-n-out and a sweet ride in your car, by manon.

yoonchae’s browsing your desk, desperate to find that orange 8-ball that you have attached to your keys. her eyes land on it and she can already smell the burgers that manon will buy for her from doing this.

and with a smile, yoonchae’s sitting in your precious red mustang. manon cruising it down to the freeway with two goals in mind. to make this the best birthday gift you’ve ever received and to do it in your car.

yoonchae doesn’t make a comment when she notices how intently manon’s eyeing different bouquets. the way she only chooses the best looking roses, and how she buys all of your favorite snacks, not batting an eye at the price. 

yoonchae happily eats her burger in the passenger seat, watching manon arrange the flowers and gift basket in the backseat. and even though later yoonchae’s dismissed to do whatever she wants, she watches from the house. the way manon grabs pillows and blankets stuffing them inside the car. she certainly finds it weird that manon’s stringing fairy lights in your convertible. 

she also doesn’t mention how she sees manon get all dolled up for this “birthday surprise”. she continues to watch from the corner of the house when manon leads you outside to your very decorated mustang. after almost losing your mind from wondering where your keys were.

–

“you could’ve just asked me to borrow the car, you know? i was losing my mind trying to find my keys.” you huff a bit, walking towards your beautiful car. manon’s quick to walk with you. jumping into the driver’s side when you unlock the car. you scoff before entering the passenger seat.

“well, i have a birthday surprise for you, and i needed the car for it.” she smirks, grabbing the keys once more and turning the ignition. and soon she’s pulled you two off the lot, heading up for the hills. 

“bannerman, if you crash my car, i’m going to chase you down until the ends of the earth.” you say to her, watching the skyline as you travel through the streets. 

“mm, sounds like someone has a crush.” she smirks, toying with your threat.

“you wish.” you scoff, directing yourself to pull this conversation into another direction. she’s telling you stories of her time in zurich, how she would steal her friend’s car keys and hide them for fun, until they offered to drive her wherever and whenever.

you laugh a bit, that does sound like her. and you recount stories of how your car had gotten you a lot of attention in high school, manon stops tuning in once she hears about how one girl thought the passenger seat to your mustang was her seat.

and soon you’ve pulled up to an overlook. a gaze out onto the city of angels. 

“happy birthday, baby.” manon presents to you a cupcake with a lit candle, “make a wish.”

you don’t say it out loud, but you wish for the girl right in front of you. and after blowing out the candle, manon smiles when she sees you bite into the cupcake. delight spreading over your face, and manon swears she will make your wish true no matter what it is.

“thanks, you didn’t have to do all this.” you say as you unwrap manon’s cupcake for her. 

“i wanted to do this for you, it’s your birthday.” she says quietly, gazing out into the city with sparkles in her eyes. you let the soft music playing from the car consume you. it’s been months since you’ve started this arrangement and lately you can’t even tell if it’s your own desire for her bleeding into the idea that she might like you back. 

no one else has given so much thought into preparing a birthday celebration for you. you continue to stare at her as she stares out at the city. a warmth spreading in your chest that you’re struggling to contain. the loss of self-control building in your chest but also in your voice.

“manon, i think i love you.” you offer. 

she continues to stare out into the city, her eyes closing when she hears those very words. 

“i know.” she says it back like she’s walking a tightrope, like she’s scared to admit her truth as well. 

“i think i love you too, but i’m scared.” she trails off, clasping her fingers together, and she sighs, letting her head fall on your shoulder. you take a minute to digest her words, you’ve never felt so conflicted to hear these words. 

“why are you scared?” you both stare out into the city, like it’ll calm the chaos that’s been plaguing both of your brains.

“i’m scared i’m going to mess this up.” manon’s eyes are closed as she thinks about how happy you make her. how she never wants distance from you, the same distance that you enforced on her to keep everyone off your backs. “i’m scared that i’m too much for you.”

you think of all that you two have done, besides the physical intimacy, there’s so much more you want, the desire for a permanent space in her life.

“i’m scared too, but i want you more.” you offer back, she nods at the words. digesting the way you’ve always been so sure of yourself, even though you hurt yourself by holding yourself back you’ve been so sure of her.

“i didn’t want to assume more than what we had.” manon speaks gently, tracing shapes onto your skin. small hearts that keep looping into each other. 

“i didn’t want to either, but i think eventually i would’ve told you.” you grin to yourself. feeling the weight of the confession being lifted off your shoulders. 

“i’m glad you said something first, i don’t think i would’ve had the courage to.” she says, stopping her tracing to look into your eyes. you laugh a bit.

“you can’t tell me you have feelings for me, but you’ll do this instead?” you point at your gift filled car. you smirk when you notice the small teddy bear with a heart pillow. manon just blushes instead, not answering your observation.

you get off the hood of your car, walking to the back to admire her handiwork. the backseat covered in fairy lights and small paper hearts that hung from the ceiling. you laugh a bit before entering the backseat, pulling manon in with you.

“mind explaining this setup to me?” you grin at her, watching the way she gets embarrassed. 

“it’s stupid really, i wanted us to have chocolates and chill in your car. something lowkey that you would like.” she says, pulling out some chocolate she had sent over from zurich.

you grab her face, placing a long kiss onto her lips, one that expressed the gratitude for her attentiveness.

“this is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me.” you grab a piece of chocolate from her and toss it into your mouth. letting the music carry the silence of the night. she tosses one into her mouth as well. 

“you’re welcome, baby.” she grabs your face to kiss you. letting her feelings pull her in. and soon you’re all over her. chocolates and gifts long forgotten when she’s the most gorgeous gift you’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

you can feel your soul becoming lighter, a sense of belonging as you pull her onto you, legs straddled on you. kissing heavily as the music is drowning in the background. the sensation of soft lips, ones you could lose yourself in forever. the tugs from her as she pulls your hair softly, pulling you back until you’re off her lips. a glazed smile on your face, zero-ed in on hers. admiring the smears of her lipstick as you lick your lips, tasting your favorite cherry lip-gloss that she owns.

“my sweet angel, you wore cherry?” you grin, using a thumb to wipe of the lip-gloss.

“it is your favorite.” she grins, slowly unzipping her hoodie, revealing the red lace lingerie set that always has your eyes go wide. and like clockwork she watches the way your eyes grow to the size of a baseballs. hands immediately latched onto her sides, like a bull you’re ready to charge at red.

she’s perfectly set up this plan, aiming that by the end of the night you get to unwrap your birthday present. 

her.

clad in your favorite red lingerie set.

you pull her closer as you run your fingers over the lace, the familiar feeling of devouring your favorite meal. and with fervor, your back to kissing her, slipping your tongue into her mouth, letting the hotness consume you. acting on pure instinct and hunger, your hands grace her boobs, grabbing one with your hand as you hold the back of the neck with the other. she’s losing herself in the process as well, loving the attention and hunger you’re displaying. she chose the right outfit to wear tonight.

“baby, please.” she whines when you continue to kiss her. moving to kiss her cheeks and pushing her backwards. kissing upon her lace covered skin.

“please? you’re going to have to be more specific.” you let out in between kisses. you play with the straps of her corset. letting one fall off her shoulder.

“please, need you.” you shake your head at her, not heeding her request. “down there, please.”

shes trying to move your hands downward, and you let her. moving it to exactly where you know she needs you the most. and you’re toying with her, liking the way she curls her body into you, breathing heavy and panting. the way she whimpers when you squeeze her bud gently. 

pulling away quickly, she’s about to protest when you grab her to be placed onto the blanket. tucking the pillow just under her neck and kissing her. a reminder of how sweet you are in the passion of devouring her. her eyes watch you intently, the way you shrug off your jacket, leaving you in a sleeveless top. the way she can see the way your muscles are tense as you use your arms to prop you up. she swears she’s never felt so hot for you before.

something about the confidence in knowing her body inside and out has her ready to let everything go. let you control her body like a marionette. and she does.

she lets you toy with her, using your fingers to dexterously bring her closer and closer to her peak. the way you’ve sunken down to explore her both with your hands and mouth. 

“fuck, how are you so good at that.” she’s gasping for you. 

she’s letting out sounds that you didn’t even knew existed. grasping for the seat and window like a lifeline. lost in the pleasure of you, she’s completely let herself free, loud moanings that make the music go silent. until all you can hear is her, in her most vulnerable state.

“baby, please please please, keep going.” she’s begging now, struggling to keep eye contact but trying her best to make you understand just how bad she needs you.

“shit, oh my god, i’m cumming.” and soon she’s crushing your head with her thighs, squeezing you as she rides out her orgasm, the waves of pleasure crashing into herself, slight convulsions and twitches. neither of you say a word as you both catch your breathing. she pulls for you, open hands waiting for you to cuddle her. 

and you do.

you hold her close, just like you always have. she grabs onto you, grip never letting up. she traces the tattoos that you have on your arm, the same one that she loves so much. 

you let yourself feel vulnerable too, draping your jacket over her body, singing her whatever song is softly playing the background, not even moving until sunrise. 

you’re back in the katseye house by the early morning, and you can only hope no one has spotted you two. the way you both look like a wreck and reek of each other.

you smile as you carry a sleeping manon into the house, still snuggled into your jacket as you set her down into your room.

–

the first to say something is megan, and to her defense, it was meant as a joke. until everyone became far too quiet for a simple joke.

it happens during movie night, lara’s put on a classic horror film: the shining. your lack of fear for horror movies has yoonchae and manon hanging onto you throughout the movie. yoonchae’s tucked into your side, ears closed as she tries to get through this scary scene.

manon’s even worse, seated into your lap, away from the TV. her head tucked into the crook of your neck, scared beyond belief. you silent rub her back, whispering to her that “everything will be okay.” 

megan’s laughing her ass off at the scene, finding it more hilarious than anything. daniela and sophia are less scared, but still attentively watching the film. lara doesn’t feel any kind of way as she watches the film, happy to just continue eating her popcorn.

“that scene is so funny!”  megan shouts at the TV, looking at the way yoonchae and manon are gripping onto you for dear life. you simply shrug at the TV, continuing to pat manon’s back.

“not funny at all!” manon shouts back, her eyes still closed shut and letting you rub her back. 

“oh baby, it’s okay, it’s just a movie.” you say to her but megan overhears it. and without a second thought she opens her mouth.

“baby? are you two finally dating?” megan askes jokingly, eyes wide as she smiles. everyone can hear the pin drop as soon as megan said the final word. lara and daniela are sharing looks, sophia’s ready to get up and lecture the group. meanwhile yoonchae peaks her head up. 

no one says a word for a couple seconds, until everyone’s overlapping with each other.

“n-no listen, it’s not like that.” you offer, feeling your ears heat up.

“i so called it!” daniela shouts at you two.

“jesus, guys! this isn’t any of our business!” sophia’s quick to mediate, trying to settle the chaos that was brewing.

“oh my god, they found out.” manon whispers to you, curling even further into you, embarrassment exploding within her.

“i stole your car keys for manon. sorry.” yoonchae says to you lightly, and you can already feel a pressure migraine growing as all the girls are talking over each other. daniela and lara sharing what they’ve noticed.

“fuck my life.” you groan, and feel manon giggle into you.

--

a/n: tried a new format! and a comeback fic that was not proofread/first smut-ish fic, this was so fun to write! stay safe and stay healthy everyone!

[wtfaniii]

Saw this somewhere (can't remember where) and I'm DESPERATE to see your take on this. So Inho watches over the games bla bla bla but then suddenly he sees a familiar face of a girl he hooked up with once and so he convinces himself he's joining just for Gi-hun but in reality he wants to meet her again because he was lole dead set on making her wife number two after that night. Then theres this one time where they're eating together and she gives Jun-hee her food and denying she's hungry but then Young-il gives her his. Just ackkkkk praying you'll notice this one😓😓

Sorry for the delay but here is your order 😸

Old Love

Summary: You and In-ho had a fleeting but intense teenage romance, due to fate you separated and once again he had you in front of him making him awaken feelings buried deep in his heart.

Warning: some drama and just some Disney-style cheesiness LOL

Hwang In-ho (Young-il) x fem reader

—I promise to love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

—You're too cheesy, ¿you know? —You said amused but blushing as In-ho scattered kisses all over your face.

—I know, and that's how you love me —He responded by taking your face to bring you closer to his lips and kiss you intensely.

He kissed you so hard that he pushed you back and the two of fell on backs onto the grass, your school uniforms were covered in dirt and the judging glances of some adults were present but you didn't care, when you were together the rest around you didn't exist.

—I have to go home or dad will kill me —You said with a laugh as you stood up and shook your skirt.

Your father wasn't the best man in the world, he was an alcoholic and usually spent all his money on that but your innocent and trusting heart still appreciated him, that was something that In-ho hated and loved at the same time, your heart was always more influenced than your brain so you refused to see the evil in some people.

So he spoke without thinking.

—You should stay with me tonight, mom will make samgyeopsal for dinner.

He didn't want you to go back home, at this time of the evening your father was already very drunk and you would be burdened with some chores, he hoped that tonight would be different for you.

You smiled and even though you knew it wouldn't be the best decision, you agreed to go with him to his house.

[...]

His eyes stopped on the screen and the glass of liquor stayed centimeters from his lips when he saw your face among those players.

It was impossible.

It had been thirty-seven years since he last saw you and yet there you were, with your hair disheveled, an anguished look and blood splattered on your face but to him you were still as beautiful as before.

He got up from his couch and left his room to go to the control center, he didn't want you to get shot for moving, he didn't want you to die now that he had seen your face again after so many years.

But maybe seeing you through a screen trying to survive would be torture, and him chances of protecting you would be limited.

Then he thought...

He also had to keep an eye on Gi-hun, he had to analyze every movement and thought of his enemy and the best way to do it was to infiltrate those games, to be one more among those people.

If he participated, he could protect you better and keep an eye on Gi-hun, two birds with one stone, but there was a slight problem, you knew him, that would put his identity at risk with the others, that would be a crime.

But it would also be a crime to let you die in there.

Of course, neglecting Gi-hun would also be very bad.

After a few seconds of thinking about this plan he finally made a decision, left his second in command, put on the green uniform with the number 001 and entered that arena when everyone was returning to the huge room.

He first observed you from a short distance, seeing you team up with Gi-hun and Player 390, you were sociable, just as he remembered, you were always very kind to others that's why you had friends everywhere.

But if you had as many friends as he thought, ¿how did you end up here?

After the vote In-ho approached you, when you saw him you didn't recognize right away, something that made it easier for him for lie about his name but after a few minutes sitting next to you while Jung-bae and Dae-ho talked about the navy excitedly he heard a soft squeal from you, seeing you he saw your surprised expression.

It took you a while to recognize him, he had changed a little after so many years, he was now more handsome but his eyes were the same, his gaze and attention to what surrounded him was still there.

—In-ho... —You murmured, still unable to believe it.

Luckily for him, he was the only one who heard your words, he made a sign to you to move away from the group so he could talk to you.

When him hand touched yours it was like feeling an electric current run through your body, your skin prickled and your breath caught in the throat.

[...]

—¿Are you sure? If you want me to stop, just tell me.

You smiled and kissed him cheek, it was nighttime, In-ho had sneaked into your bedroom through your window and now the two of were under the sheets trying to take a big step in the relationship.

—I'm sure, I want to do it... —You murmured, leaving another short kiss on him lips.

He was on top of you wearing only underwear and just as nervous as you, for both of it was the first time and you had no idea what were going to do but he would try to make it special and unforgettable, he wanted to make you feel loved and adored and that's what he was going to do.

Everything was going great in the relationship, went to school together, came home together, sometimes you went with him to his house to spend time with his family and at night he came into your room to love you body and soul.

[...]

—¿Why did you lie about your name? —You asked once if the two of were separated from the others

—It's hard to explain ¿but what are you doing here? I thought you lived in Canada.

He was full of questions and memories that overwhelmed him, as well as those butterflies in his stomach that he felt when was with you just like before.

You twisted lips as remembered that, you moved to Canada on a scholarship but due to your breakup with In-ho you were emotionally vulnerable, you got involved with people who didn't contribute to your life and they led you to the places are you now.

In-ho noticed your silence and knew that things hadn't worked out well for you since the last time you saw each other.

He just hugged you and you immediately responded. It was like a dream to be in him arms again, to smell him scent and feel him warmth.

—I didn't think I'd see you again... —You told him sincerely, your heart still belonged to him since you were sixteen.

—I'm not going to let you go this time...

It was a promise, he wasn't willing to let you go again like years ago, this time he would make sure to stay with you no matter the obstacles.

During his stay there he stayed close at all times, watching as you tried to be nice to the other players and managed to ally yourself with other sides, including one that included a pregnant woman named Jun-hee.

You were quite compassionate and kind despite the circumstances, you were still the same or so you seemed but he knew you well enough to lean towards the second option.

He didn't know what you had been through in that foreign country, In-ho just wanted to heal your wounds, take care of you and provide for you as he once promised in his teenage years.

—Take my food —You said to Jun-hee taking her hand to make her hold the small can —You need it more than I do.

Embarrassed and grateful Jun-hee took the food and smiled at you, when you returned with the rest In-ho handed you his food.

—Oh no I couldn't —You said, denying flatly, you didn't want to leave him without eating.

—Please eat it or your mood won't be as nice if you have an empty stomach.

He really knew you like the back of his hand.

In-ho always put your needs above his own, he was a gentleman to you and that would never change.

Even the last time you saw him, when you said goodbye at the airport, he was more concerned about your feelings than his own pain, he showered you with nice words and promises that were never fulfilled.

He was capable of anything for you but in those years of youth he had limited possibilities.

Not currently, that's why he didn't hesitate for a second to kill the player who was with you in the room during the Mingle game, the guards wouldn't kill you, nor him but he wasn't ready to give you explanations yet, he didn't want that side of him to come out with you yet.

However, your reaction to seeing him kill was something that felt like a pressure on his chest.

[...]

It was a weekend afternoon, you and In-ho were walking around a fair eating cotton candy and popcorn while looking for a mechanical game to test.

The roller coaster and carousel were fun but now you were looking for something more interesting.

—¿What would you prefer? Let the aliens take me ¿or offer someone else in my place?

—The aliens wouldn't take you, there's nothing in your brain that they find interesting — You joked amused.

He put a hand to his chest, dramatically indignant.

—You're cruel, but maybe you're right —He said with a soft smile as he held your hand again and kissed your cheek—But I would prevent the aliens from taking you.

—¿And who would you offer in my place? —You asked curiously.

—Oh I don't know... maybe-...

—My dad.

—¡Yes! ¡Your dad! —In-ho laughed at his own response, but felt you pushing him through the crowd to the opposite side of where they were walking.

He was about to ask what going on when he saw you arguing with your father, the man looked at him angrily as he tried to push you away to get to him.

You knew that your father wouldn't allow you to have a boyfriend, he used to call you "slut" just for seeing you talking to a boy and now that he had seen you so affectionate and happy with In-ho he was more than furious.

In-ho wasn't going to run away even if you asked him to, he wasn't afraid of getting hit if that meant defending your honor and dignity, so when you saw him get up and stand between you and your father, you felt like your heart had stopped in your chest.

You did everything to separate them, In-ho was at a disadvantage compared to your father, the man was big and rough, definitely your dear boyfriend took the brunt of his fury.

After minutes that seemed like hours, the police arrived at the scene and arrested your father and In-ho was taken to the hospital with a black eye, a broken leg and a split lip.

—I'm so sorry...

In-ho's heart hurt more than his physical wounds, seeing you cry and worried about him was unbearable and he didn't want you to go through that kind of violence again.

—Run away with me —He said seriously while sitting on the edge of the bed, the two of them waiting for him mother to arrive —I have worked and I have enough money to get away from here on the next train.

You looked at him in silence, you knew he wasn't joking but you couldn't leave, you had nothing to lose but he did, he had a family that loved him, a younger brother on the way and friends at school, you weren't going to drag him with you into your world full of worries and problems.

—I love you In-ho... —You murmured, leaving a kiss on the corner of him lips —But...

—But you don't want to leave... —he deduced when didn't get a concise answer.

Loving sometimes means letting go, he made you happy but you weren't the best for him, or at least that's what you thought.

Life had been so bad to you since you were little that and believed that happiness was not for you, you were not worthy of what In-ho gave you.

After that day you started to drift apart, In-ho wouldn't drop you off at your house after school and you didn't go to him house to eat anymore, the nights became lonely and little by little your relationship was ending.

Until two weeks later they offered you a scholarship that you accepted without hesitation only to walk away permanently.

In-ho didn't know until the day of your departure only because his mother told him, he practically ran to the airport and managed to say goodbye to you.

There were no words, just silent glances and a short hug before you got on the plane.

He let you go but he didn't stop loving you

[...]

—You killed that man —You said, still unable to fully process how this man you loved so much could stain his blood so easily.

Yes, this was a win or die competition but you didn't think In-ho was capable of going to such lengths to survive, plus you had the feeling he was hiding something from you, he didn't want to tell his real name and he was lying about some things.

—Yes ¿and? It was him or us —He replied, stopping his walk back to the room with the other players to turn to look at you.

He didn't want to have to give you explanations now, just wanted you to stay with him without asking the reason why he did things.

In-ho wanted you to trust him blindly again, just as he trusted you completely.

He extended a hand towards you without taking his eyes off yours.

—Stay with me this time.

You only hesitated for a few seconds.

—¿Do you remember what I promised you when I asked you to be my girlfriend? —You nodded silently, you remembered everything perfectly, ¿how could you forget? Any man who was with you after In-ho didn't fill that void in your heart.

—I still love you, I have since saw you and that's not going to change, stay with me this time.

The intense love they had was still there, it was a small flame that only needed firewood to regain the strength it had.

You took him hand and he smiled sincerely with love, as long as you were together the rest of the world was no problem.

—This time I'm not going anywhere without you —You said quietly just so he could hear but with certainty.

"I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow" For him these words were real when were about you.

[urstruly-ghst]

girl, get up ! - riddle, leona, vil, silver

in which u suck at phys ed and they're trying to help you out

requested ask !

author's note: i am not physically fit as i like, but dw!! we all have our moments 😌 now get up and be that slay queen (or start low impact exercises for now!)

riddle rosehearts

riddle rosehearts is a well rounded individual, he was raised in a household were meals calculated and regimes strictly adhered. if you think riddle is strict with his exercising, you would be surprised. riddle was someone who was not the most adept to exercising, and understands you wanting to take it at your pace. but don't think you're getting away with it.

fret not! riddle takes things slow, and in accordance with the rules of the queen of hearts, taking note of your weaknesses and strengths. he even rewards you at the end, each small victory was worth a party.

if your goal was to hit 5 pushups or rounds of burpees, he'd set it to 10. harsh, however, he claims if you settle for less you get less. riddle wants you to aim high (and he would even join in on your physical journey!)

"i think im gonna be sick" you yelp and try to not pass out at your 4th day of attempting to do sets of squats and this exercise.

"you're doing fine, rose." riddle said smiling before observing your notions. despite your protests, you did well. your initial goal of just 5 laps around the oval became 6! it was a small improvement, but you managed to do it.

"after this, we can relax and enjoy some new tarts trey baked." riddle smile warmly as he jogged next to you, noticing you brighten up

leona kingscholar

leona laughed at you first. born with athletic capabilities, he couldn't believe you can't do a simple push up or run down at least 5 laps. however, he wasn't one to keep someone down, leona wants a fair fight.

it starts off simple, leona would observe you and see it as you not pushing yourself. leona would be behind you, motivating you (odd to see him out of bed), making sure you're in the right position and actually getting your goal. you need 30 push ups for vargas? you're doing those 30 push ups... with his help.

lends a lot of his time or some trainer to help you. though, don't expect he'd be doing this often, he still likes his nap times you know? you can do exercises after the nap!

"mmh. herbivore. you're quite close to running more than yesterday" leona mumbled walking beside you as you jogged. his long strides make your jog a walk for him. he admired you before patting your head

"yeah because you literally pushed me!" you retort but he smiled and followed you to the end of the track, marking your newfound success: running 500 meters!

"good job, herbivore... now let's go rest, you ended exactly on my nap time."

vil schoenheit

vil wasn't going to make you be a lazy potato. he can see the potential and determination from you. he is the most hands-on out of all, he tracks it closely and adheres everything to his own personal trainer.

each move you both do comes from professional advise and vil does the same exercises as you (although with bit more intensity on his end). the meals afterwards were also a highlight. vil prepared the after meals himself, go on, eat up!

he's more strict. vil won't take no willy nilly answer, and he won't allow slip ups. vil is a very determined person, once he sees a diamond that needs polishing, he'll handcraft it with time and effort. vil showers each progress you've done with praise and small personal victories he records and keeps hidden for him to admire.

"ah, my dear, look at that. another stellar news, you've managed to hit the goal in record time." vil rejoices as you both finished the prescribed exercises from his trainer. you beamed and smiled proudly

"all thanks to you, vil!" you praise him but he smiled and shakes his head.

"no, all you, dear. you pushed your limits and got us both here."

silver

silver is a trained knight, he was no stranger to the regime of ruthless training. however, he does know that reaching goals is hard. he had his fair share of failures of reaching certain goals with his habit of sleeping. though, silver is still strict and maintains that if you want to be active, push through it

he would share his regime at a lighter level and even trains you himself, silver guides you gently and even makes you disregard your goal so he ensures you're not in a hurry and get hurt. though, that was because his regime had quite some brutal exercises.

and sometimes, he'd pull in sebek or lilia for some regime tweaking so he can sneak more time to help you be more active. though it was difficult sometimes, silver can't help but feel sleepy sometimes when he trains you...

"okay, your footing isn't that great. it lacks some..." silver yawned as he gracefully guides you into holding a baton firmly. you were sweating as the faux fighting with the baton proved to be more difficult. it was awesome though, you get to see him wield such grace!

"silver, we need a break" you huff tired. silver smiled before shaking his head, even if he was sleepy, he wasn't allowing you be trained half-assed.

"nope. now, parry"

[twilightau]

LOVE VIRUS; L.DH

synopsis — after a fateful encounter with a mysterious resident, you decide to follow his example and became a nurse, just to get the chance to see him again. romance, fate-like moments, you expected a lot from your first meeting after many years... just to find out he is the most insufferable jerk!

genres — first love au, co-workers-to-lovers, doctor au

pairing — lee donghyuck x fem!reader

warnings — language, mentions of death, incorrect medical descriptions, accidentally attempted suicide, sharp objects, medical setting

word count — 7,6k

[ ♡ previous part. ] — [ ♡ next part. ]

Nobody liked the ending of things. Everyone liked beginning something believing or hoping it would help them reach a specific place. Still, that certainty stops once you get the spot you only dreamt about.

Endings were never your think. Everyone liked beginnings, it meant starting on a dream, creating hope, believing in a certain goal. But it all halts it's fairytale-like meaning when you don't know what to begin with.

High school ended in less than eight days, and you were wasting time with your girlfriends in the streets of Seoul, none of you with any ambitions for the future. All you could think of was which bars to sneak into and how to convince a tired convenience store employee on midnight duty to give you a pack of cigarettes for cheaper.

Uncertainty scared you, but it was so damn frustrating to find a career path that suited you. You weren’t the smartest in class, you hated numbers, you were far from the most athletic, and frankly speaking, you hated studying in general. No one was going to accept a student with a bad rep anyway, even though most of the bad doings were done by your friends, you were just merely a bystander.

But what will you become if you cannot find the right path in time?

These wandering thoughts and ‘what ifs' were eating away at your sanity. Your drunk friend waved at you, signing you to another night of drinking all your insecurities away. You smiled at her, about to join the group when you heard a loud clatter behind you. A small elder who was collecting cartons onto his little cart fell to the ground, his frame getting smaller with each bathed breath you took. 

You didn't know how you crossed the road in seconds. Your heart was still racing while you asked the elder if he was alright. You could still hear the ringing in your ear while you told him to follow your breathing pattern. He tried to grasp for something inside the cart, you leaped forward to find his bag hanging on the handle of the cart. But it was too late, the man was already out cold on the ground.

If what you felt before was anxiety, you are now in full worry. “Sir, can you hear me? Please answer me if you can?” You heard his breathing but it started to sound more labored by the second. You searched his bag for any indication but found two unfamiliar types of medicine. You were not a pre-med student and stood frozen at the realization that you did not know how to help this elder.

“Someone help! This man collapsed on the ground!” You yelled into the empty streets of Seoul at twilight. Everyone was busy zombie-ing themselves to a restaurant or club to relieve stress, the working class could not afford to save another person but themselves. You kept shouting for help, feeling the man’s pulse weakening. The sight was making your heartache.

“Are you alright?” You heard from your left, you nodded before taking the outstretched hand without looking, pulling the person down with you to observe the elder. He didn’t seem to mind, immediately getting to work. “Okay, what happened?” You told him how you found him and how long you have stayed and watched his condition.

The stranger starts looking around, grabbing the elder’s bag and rummaging through his things as if looking for specific items. It is the first time you look at the stranger, and you realize it is a handsome stranger. 

The points of his curly brown hair are slightly darker, soaked in sweat as if he came running. His nose had a soft round tip and his lips were upturned, a wide cupid’s bow engraved in his upper lip. You almost start counting the moles on his face before you realize what he might be looking for.

“A-are you looking for these?” Your outstretched hands contain the two unknown tubes of medicine. The stranger looks relieved and nods. He opens the cap and you realize it is a needle instead of a pod of pills. He stabs it into the leg of the elder with a force that shocks you, but his smile reassures you ever so slightly.

“Can you call an ambulance? The number is on that utility pole, I think–” He looks at the medication bottle for a second, “Mister Hwang is going to be just fine, don’t worry.” You nod, but your hands still tremble, the adrenaline leaving your body. The stranger holds you still, “You did well. Mister Hwang is going to be okay thanks to you.” He gave you a warm smile and patted your head encouragingly. 

When the ambulance arrived, the stranger took over the situation entirely. “Hello, my name is Lee Donghyuck. Please go to Neo-Seoul Medical Center, I’m a 2nd-year resident there.” The paramedic nodded and Haechan hopped onto the vehicle behind the stretcher. You watched as the back doors closed and the car drove away, the whole scene leaving you in awe.

The words he had spoken to you were still replaying in your mind, slowly woven into your heart like a design into a sweater that cannot be removed. For the first time in your life, you did not screw something up, you helped save a human and you succeeded. Haechan and the ambulance were long gone by now, but it was almost like the trail it left behind was highlighted in gold; you had found your career path in life thanks to him.

♡

Neo-Seoul Medical Center was one of the most prestigious university hospitals in all of South Korea. Standing in front of a hospital to start your career was unimaginable for you five years ago. And if it depended on your GPA back then, you’d have never been able to start a medical career at all. It helped that you had good study buddies who helped you with the selection exams as well as teachers who truly saw your good qualities behind all the natural clumsiness you radiated.

You smiled at the building once more before Chenle called your name, telling you to hurry up before you got late for your introduction week. He was one of the few close friends you made during nursing school. He was similar in the way he always went beyond for the people he cared for, but unlike you, he doesn’t always act on his emotions.

Your introduction group consists of two other rookie nurses: Ningning and Sion. You weren’t familiar with the two, but it wasn’t unknown that Yizhou was the top student during your years in nursing school. 

The receptionist pointed your group towards the eleventh floor where a head nurse would appoint you each to a department.

Once the elevator door opened, you were met by an administrative nurse who told you to wait a bit. The LED screen above the reception showed that there were several surgeries being performed right now. Your eyes widened at a familiar name between them.

Lead surgeon – Lee Donghyuck – General Surgery  00:02:10:37

He has not left this hospital despite all these years. A small smile creeps up your face. Ever since you decided to study nursing, you had secretly wondered if you’d ever get to work with him. The image of the two of you rushing to help patients always helped you ground yourself while preparing for another practical exam. 

A familiar mop of dark brown curls passed your daydreaming state and you were quick to react. His scent, his hair, his soft features, and his moles; it was just like you remember. You start to realize that he hasn’t moved, your hands unbeknownst to you holding onto the sleeve of his dark blue scrubs. He looks at you with confusion, about to speak but you beat him to it, almost in a hurry to tell him everything you wanted to him all these years before you lose your courage.

“Dr. Donghyuck, I– I’m so glad to see you again. Thanks to your help, I was able to see the path before me and worked hard for the past 5 years to get here. I am so happy to be able to enter the same hospital as you and look up to you as–” He holds up a hand, making you stop mid-sentence. He raises a brow and makes a clicking sound with his tongue. 

“Listen, I don’t have time for this right now.” He looks at your badge and then your fellow rookie nurses behind you. “You are the new rookie?” He scoffed, rolling his eyes before continuing, “Okay. Listen up, you guys, too. Do not ask stupid questions that you could have studied beforehand, do not waste doctor’s time, and –,” he looked straight at you, “Do not talk to me unless necessary. I’ve got better things to do.” You let go of his sleeve, your cheeks heating up with embarrassment and anger. Who the hell does this jerk think he is?

“Seems the rookies have met our fellow Donghyuck” A female voice states, you look to your left to find a woman in purple scrubs next to your group. “Hello rookies, my name is Karina Yu. I’m the head nurse of the emergency department and your temporary mentor while you do the rotations. Now get out your little notepads, write down everything I’m telling you, and make sure to ask if something is unclear. The emergency department isn’t a place that goes slow and steady, if you notice something you must be fast on your feet and react quickly. Understood?”

“Yes ma’am!”

“Nurse Karina is fine, by the way.” She smiled kindly before it dropped and she started to walk and talk like it was a military drill. 

♡

“Okay, this is our weekly schedule board. We have it digitally but since the emergency department is about always being on the move, it would be too troublesome to have someone look it up every seven minutes. I added some ID pictures so you guys can easily distinguish which surgeon and doctor is who.

This is Lee Mark, he is a cardiac surgeon who often handles emergency cases since he just recently switched to CS from GS. The cardiology department is on the eighth floor, but you will find him in the doctor’s room of our department more often. If you have any questions, go to him and he will answer them in detail for you.

This fellow is Lee Donghyuck, he is from general surgery and the main surgeon you will work with here. Liu Yangyang is also a fellow GS specialist and the other surgeon you will meet the most often. Both the general surgery specialists are quite strict and meticulous in their work and it shows in the way that they will hold you accountable for any mistake you make. Remember, this is not nursing school anymore, you passed your exam: now it is real.

“Yes, earlier you mentioned we will start rotations in the ER. Do all four of us start in the ER?” You ask, trying not to get too embarrassed by your little stutter.

“No, from the spreadsheet I received only nurse Yizhou and Y/N will start in the ER. Nurse Chenle will assist Dr. Lee Mark in cardiology and Nurse Sion will join neurology and assist Dr. Qian Kun until the further rotation. The four of you will rotate around cardiology, neurology, and emergency as you have chosen these preferences. Of course, if in any case, those three departments end up not befitting your best qualities, you can apply for any of the other departments you want to try out. After your introductory period, you can decide which department you want to join.” The four of you nod at Karina’s words. 

“The surgeons in our team seem to be young, do we not have any senior doctors in our team on site?” Ningning asks. Unlike the way you asked your question, Yizhou remains cool and focused, her hands writing down everything she hears while her eyes are trained on everything Karina points out.

“Good question, we do have young surgeons because they are exceptionally good and adaptive to the always-changing situations in the ER. Do not let their age fool you, Mark has already finished his fellowship and is only a humble step away from his next promotion. Haechan and Yangyang are both in their last stretches as well and have gained enough trust from the Chief of General Surgery dr. Kim Doyoung to work independently on ER cases while our emergency surgeon Dr. Lee Taeyong is on leave.”

♡

The soft melody of a random R&B song plays in the living room while you clean the fog of your mirror. You look at your tired reflection, but muster up the energy to smile back at yourself. As much as today went by fairly peacefully, you can’t shake off the unfortunate encounter with Dr. Donghyuck. Was five years enough time to change an entire personality, or did your young and naive self paint him in a light he was never meant to be seen in?

“Y/N, where did you put the remote? I swear you never place it back at our designated spot!” Winter complains, already in the doorway of your shared bathroom to give you an earful about designated spots for shared items. But every word she planned to say dies down when she sees your face.

“Y/N? Is something wrong? Didn’t your first day go well?” She takes your hand and leads you to the couch, two cups of warm tea already on the coffee table. “What happened?” She asks after you haven’t answered her first question.

“It’s nothing. Just some nerves” You try to shrug it off, but your roommate keeps staring at you with suspicion. 

“Babe, as a third-year nurse, I have already honed the ability to sense lies whenever I ask my patients about medication. I don’t want to play nurse when I’m at home as well. So spill, what is upsetting little spring sunshine?” You crack a small smile at the nickname; your overexcitement on the first day of moving in made the apartment owner laugh, she said a little spring sunshine will move in with the resident winter princess. Since then, Winter and you have started to call each other those nicknames to become more comfortable with each other as roommates and friends. 

“Remember why I joined nursing school in the first place?” You asked, looking down at your takeout and poking in it with your fork. “Yeah, you fell in love with a resident and wanted to become a nurse so you could work beside him,” Winter answered breezily, slurping a long strand of noodle loudly as she looked for you to continue. 

“Don’t make it sound like I’m doing all this over a crush! I truly got inspired to get into this work field!”

“Was anything I said false though?” You didn’t answer. “Point proven.”

"Anyway!" You try to continue the subject so the two of you won’t go down that tangent. “I met him today and he became a completely different person. I’m not saying I expected him to be 100% the same, but it is kind of sad that I couldn’t find traces of the guy who inspired me in him anymore.” Winter hums, putting the plastic fork to her lips.

“Hold up, you met him today? If you were in intro group four…and you start rotation in the ER…” Minjeong taps the crease between her brows, trying to piece the strings of information together. After a few moments of silence, she gasps at the realization.

“Your first love is Lee Donghyuck isn’t it?” You nod, the burdened expression on your roommate’s face unsettles you. “You look at me like I made a big mistake, is he in a relationship or something?”

“No,” You felt relieved for some stupid reason. “But Donghyuck isn’t exactly the type of guy I imagined you being into. I thought you meant Mark Lee when you first talked about your crush.”

“What’s wrong with Donghyuck?”

“I want to say it’s a rumor, but I saw it firsthand once with a rookie nurse a few years ago. A nurse quit after just a week because Donghyuck gave him a hard time. Be perfect or he will lecture you until you’re about to hand in your resignation letter.” You pale at your roommate’s words, deeply regretting every course of action you took today, including entering the hospital. “But I’m sure it’s just a facade, so don’t lose hope yet!” She tries to cheer you up, but it is already too late. You have dug your own grave.

♡

As if the gods wanted to mess with you for a bit, you were assigned to assist Donghyuck’s patients. To say your first week went bad was an understatement. Karina was right when she said Donghyuck has a low tolerance for questions he gets annoyed at anything relatively quickly.

On your second day shadowing him, you noticed that he had long legs. Legs that do not wait for you and your cart to keep up. He gave you a side-eye when you eventually arrived at the right room, you also got lost because he didn’t wait up.

(“If this were an emergency alarm, the patient might have already died. Keep your head in the game, dreamer.” He mockingly taps his writing clipboard against your cart before turning around and smiling brightly at his patients. You feel like you were fuming from the ears at his act.)

On your fourth day in, you discovered a little hiding area where you could take a break without Donghyuck throwing mean remarks at you. You figured, if he can’t find you, he can’t talk bad about you.

The little box of cookies you found in a drawer was already half gone once you heard two people enter the room, a small curtain separating you from them. 

“Dude, I think that Nurse Y/N might have a crush on you!” Dr. Liu said with excitement. It has been a while since romance blossomed for his friend and the littlest indication that it might happen again made him happy. 

Donghyuck raised his brow, “Who?”, and Yangyang’s smile drowned away. He doesn’t even know your name? “Nurse Y/N, she is – dude?" Donghyuck shakes his head. “For real? The nurse who has been assisting you for the past four days?” 

“Oh, the dreamer. I doubt she’d have a crush on me.” Maybe it was because you couldn’t see his face, but your delusion might have caught a bit of a somber tone in his voice.

“Besides, the chances of something happening between me and her is 0.00001%. Any other rookie might even be better than her.” Lee Donghyuck has proven once again that he is hard to empathize with.

(“Have you seen my chocobi cookies, by the way? I was planning on eating them but I couldn’t find them in my snack drawer.”)

You finished his nasty cookies with no regrets. 

Your fifth day came around and you were doing your rounds without Donghyuck, the doctor was yet to return from a four-hour surgery and thus you ended up doing the rounds with Mark. 

Although Mark was a bit too much of a talker, it was a nice change of pace compared to the GS specialist who criticized your every move. 

“You just have to look through the words,” Mark said after he finally made you share your worries with him. The two of you already arrived at the third room for the current check-up round.

“I’d rather not look straight into his eyes. If looks could kill, I wouldn’t have made it past day one, dr. Lee” You slide open the door and greet the patients warmly. In the room were four patients from a traffic accident that happened on your second day. Because it happened late at night, Mark was already scheduled for a long surgery for pediatrics, causing Donghyuck to do back-to-back surgeries on these four patients. 

Minnie, a high school girl, greeted the two of you with a timid smile, her eyes lingered longer on Mark before meeting yours again.

“Dr. Donghyuck is currently occupied, so Dr. Lee Mark over here is guiding me today.” You explained to the girl, the feeling that she might have a crush on Donghyuck was unbelievable but also kind of cute.

“She has been waiting to thank him since yesterday evening.” Riku, a college student, commented, earning a glare from the girl which caused him to laugh. You hum while prepping Mrs. Choi for a blood sample. After you finish filling two small tubes for the tests, she signals you to come closer.

“Dr. Donghyuck allowed her boyfriend to visit her yesterday, even though visiting hours were already over. The academy hours these days cause students to finish their studies at late hours.” You look back at Minnie, noticing a singular rose in a tiny vase next to a small teddy bear on her nightstand. The scene reminds you of a sweet youth drama.

“How is your appetite, Mrs. Choi? I noticed you didn’t eat much the last few days, if you want, I can alternate a few things on your menu plan to help get your appetite back?” The older woman softly shakes her head. “No need, the doctor gave me some stomach medicine yesterday. I feel much better now.”

Although you added a small comment about Mrs. Choi’s appetite into your nurse log before you clocked out for the evening, you didn’t expect Donghyuck to take the note as seriously as he did. Writing up medicine for patients always required a lot more paperwork, and your seniors in nursing always recommended trying to minimize the prescriptions doctors had to make. 

“I’m glad it is working out, Mrs. Choi. Let me know if you need me to adjust anything, alright?” The lady smiled before turning to Mark. “The other doctor and nurse Y/N make such an interesting duo, don’t you think? They remind me of my first love.” You were already halfway through the room to check on the last patient, the comment made you stop in your tracks a second too long. Mark laughs, “What was your first love like Mrs. Choi? I wonder how Donghyuck and Y/N compare to it.”

You try to focus on the teenager’s stats, Jisoo is also seemingly intrigued by what Mrs. Choi has to say about her first love and late husband.

“We were like opposites. Chan was always driven by his ambitions, he never knew when to stop and enjoy the slow and steadiness of the world. After we met, he used to tell me how I re-taught him how to live life.” Mrs. Choi’s gaze was fixed on the window, but you knew that she was also holding back tears, it was evident in the way she spoke about her late husband. 

You finish up Jisoo’s check-up before returning to Mrs. Choi’s bedside, squatting down and giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “He sounds like a love worth spending a lifetime with, Mrs. Choi.” Her gaze turns to you and you can see the glossiness of her eyes. “Thank you.” She whispers before lying down again, Mark and you bid the other patients goodbye before leaving the room.

“You handled that situation well, nurse Y/N,” Mark says after a beat of silence. You give him a sad smile, “She lost so much in the past few days, dr. Lee. If I can lighten that pain for even a moment, I will.”

“You live up to that speech dr. Nakamoto gave on your second day, huh?” You smile, thinking back at the random visit of the pediatrician. He was looking for a specific person (you later figured that person to be Mark) but got thrust into giving the rookie nurses a motivational speech by nurse Jaemin.

(“I don’t think I’m in any position to give a speech, dr. Na.” Yuta eyed the nurses with an awkward laugh, making Jaemin, the ER doctor, challenge him further. “These nurses will rotate into your department soon, anyway. Besides, I doubt you’d come all the way down from the tenth floor to disturb us in our busiest hours, right Dr. Nakamoto?”)

Doctors treat illnesses, nurses heal patients.

Although he probably said those words without much thought behind them, you found new meaning behind those words. Sure, ever since working with Donghyuck, many of your rather superficial motivations disappeared into thin air. But Dr. Nakamoto’s words were a good reminder that Donghyuck wasn’t your only reason. 

It’s patients like Mrs. Choi, those who don’t only suffer bodily injury or illness, but also have a wound to the heart that needs healing. The surgical scars will eventually fade, but without genuine and continued support and care, a patient might carry painful memories for a long time. To you, soothing their hearts for even a moment was a reward worthy of suffering through the nursing program, and even Dr. Donghyuck’s never-ending remarks.

♡

The taste of Winter’s cooking was one you could never quite get enough of, the girl was always in her element in the kitchen and it was evident in her food. Tonight you were also accompanied by Karina. Although you already knew Winter had invited a friend over, it didn’t quite dawn upon you that the nurse friend she mentioned from time to time was going to be the head nurse of your department. The awkwardness from your greetings earlier still lingers ever so slightly in the back of your head, but you try to pay it no mind. It did help that none of you talked about work, rather giggling away with every sip of wine as you talked about your college adventures.

“You know, I think you will do well in the ER, Y/N. If you can handle someone as cold as Donghyuck, I don’t doubt that even the most enraged Karen will get to you.” Karina says in between hiccups. Winter is already leaning on her arm, slowly drifting off with occasional mumbles while Karina keeps rambling on about random thoughts she has. 

You weren’t a heavy drinker, but luckily Winter had opted for wine (the two women had already finished a few shots of soju before you came home) which you were able to handle.

“I think Donghyuck truly has a stick up his ass like he knows the ER is heavily understaffed and yet he is driving any nurse he sees away.” Karina huffs, another large gulp of red wine. 

“It’s one thing to feel entitled because you’re a good doctor, but it’s another to assume every nurse to be at that level from the start, right Y/N?” You try to pry the wine glass away from her hands, but she downs the entire glass before you can.

“Karina, are you going to be okay?” You watch as she stands up and points her finger at the decorative succulent on your dining table. “This plant is dying, it’s withering away.” It was a fake plant.

“I will call a cab for you, Karina. Where do you live?” The woman seems to acknowledge the time and her condition, already stumbling into your hallway to grab her shoes. You follow behind her with her belongings. She laughs a little too loud at your questions and points upstairs. “I’m alright, Y/N. I’m your upstairs neighbor!” She chirps happily as she spreads her arms in the air before blacking out. Great.

The trip is anything but easy: the elevator decides to take everyone else to their respective floors before arriving at the sixth floor, and of course, Karina keeps wiggling in your hold while the other residents keep side-eyeing you in your pajamas.

Since she didn’t quite tell you which unit she lived in, you had to walk past each front door like a creep with Karina’s arms nearly killing your neck. None of the unit numbers 601-604 had her surname on it. You were praying that you didn’t have to go all the way down the hall to unit 610 before you finally read her name underneath unit number 605, right next to Lee Donghyuck’s name. 

You froze, trying to process what this meant, but Karina had already woken up and was loudly banging on the front door of unit 605. You were torn between leaving her here, but she didn’t quite look sober enough to stand steadily.

The door opens after a few loud bangs from Karina, an annoyed – nothing new there – Donghyuck opens the door. His hair was damp and he was wearing grey sweats and a black shirt, a towel around his neck, and black-framed glasses adorning his face – definitely new. It takes everything in you to not admit he looks like a cute nerd in those glasses.

He was about to hurl a mean comment. At this point, you are pro at recognizing this. Donghyuck stops when his eyes settle on you. He raises a brow, and you only reply to his wordless questions with a sheepish smile.

“Your girlfriend had dinner over at our place, sorry. I put some hangover medicine in the pocket of her jacket for her to take in the morning. See you tomorrow, Dr. Lee!” And you ran away, accidentally pushing Karina into Donghyuck’s arms, but you weren’t going to stay there a second longer than needed.

Even though you thought you were pretty sure that you didn’t like Donghyuck anymore, the new information that he lived upstairs with his girlfriend still left a bitter taste in your mouth. 

♡

You were transferring your notes into the nurse logs when Karina entered your little cubicle. “Hey Y/N, are you busy?” You shake your head, moving to the side so the head nurse can comfortably stand in your little workspace.

“Normally I wouldn’t talk about personal affairs during working hours, but I wanted to apologize for my behavior yesterday. I was upset at my boyfriend and when Winter said the two of you were going to stay at home and just casually drink, I couldn’t help but ask to join. I needed some company for a bit.” She starts to explain, and you start to notice that drunk Karina and sober Karina aren’t much different. 

The scary image of head nurse Karina fades away as you watch her ramble, animatedly making her points with her facial expressions and hands. You smile at the sight, realizing the subtle cuteness of Karina’s true character. “It’s okay, nurse Karina. We all have ups and downs in relationships.” Karina shyly nods, “I also have a little request to make.” You let her continue. 

“Please don’t tell our colleagues about Donghyuck and I living together, it’s embarrassing.” Although you were confused as to why it would be embarrassing, you promised her you wouldn’t tell a soul. She gives you a grateful smile before her pager goes off. Before you turn back fully to focus on your logs again, Karina calls your name. “You can just call me Karina when we are alone. I think we are way past the formalities after what happened.” 

Karina disappears behind the doors and your polite smile falters slightly. You wonder why Winter and Mark didn’t warn you about the relationship between Karina and Donghyuck, feeling stupid that you were so open about your admiration for the man in front of people who knew he was already off the market. 

It wasn’t like you were full-on pursuing him, but it does hurt to know that his type and you were so far off, evidently marking that 0.00001% to be true. Karina was extremely pretty, smart, and good at her job. Sure, she was a rambler and loud drunk, but she easily carried herself in confidence.

A soft cough pulls you back from your thoughts. Donghyuck leans against the wall, handing you his clipboard. “I saw you were filling out the logs, can you upload this chart to Riku’s profile?” You wordlessly take the papers and start typing, expecting him to leave after he says what he needs, but you don’t hear any footsteps. Before you can ask, he starts speaking again. 

“She’s my cousin.” His words were rushed and Maeda Riku’s chart had already taken most of your attention, making the only sound coming out of your mouth a confused ‘huh?’.

“Karina, she is my cousin. I’m not dating anyone. That’s what I wanted to tell you yesterday before you ran off.” If someone told you you would see an awkward Donghyuck less than two weeks into the job, you wouldn’t believe them. The man had a sharp tongue and – just like his cousin – carried himself with certainty, attitude, and incredible skills that steadily established his dominance in the department. But for some unknown reason, he was avoiding eye contact and fumbling with something in his pockets in front of you. 

“Oh.” 

“I gave her the hangover cure, it helped.” He added after way too many seconds, still fumbling with his white coat pocket. You give him a weak smile, not knowing how to act in this strange situation. The air was not tense like it usually was, but it was far from comfortable.

“I got you the same one.” His hands were too fast, but the bottle on your desk and his empty pockets prove that he had been fumbling with the hangover medicine all this time. 

“Thank you…” The act of kindness (?) made you speechless. 

“You were reaching for your head a few times while doing rounds. It’s disturbing my work and the patients. If you can’t handle alcohol, don’t drink.” And the Lee Donghyuck you knew has ruined the moment again.

“I don’t think I deserve scolding when your cousin ended up like that.” Your remark earned a half-hearted scoff from him. You hated the way your heart started beating like your younger self again.

“Just drink it and get ready to join me for your OR testing.” 

♡

The biting winter air felt like tiny pricks against your exposed skin, but you remained seated on the cold wooden bench while hugging your bottle of water tightly. Your OR testing didn’t go wrong, but it didn’t go smoothly either. 

It wasn’t necessarily what Donghyuck said, but it was the way that he said those words to you in a room filled with your peers and other colleagues. He was complaining about how handling different tools wasn’t just about speed, but also about precision, how you were too hasty and could cause dangerous accidents. How he wouldn’t tolerate it if it were to happen in his OR and how you weren’t going in there anywhere soon.

It hurts that just when you finished painting him as an awful person, he started to make you doubt him again, causing his words to twist as painfully as they were the first few days as his assisting nurse. 

You weren’t a big fan of crying, it felt like losing control over your feelings, but you couldn’t help it when you’re so deep into your self-pity party. 

“Nurse Y/N?” The voice of an uncertain Minnie makes you look up, staring into the eyes of an equally teary-eyed teenage girl. You try to wipe away your tears in a hurry to attend to the girl, but she just hands you a handkerchief with a sympathetic smile.

“You know, crying does make everything a bit better, don’t you think?” She asks through a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes. You breathe in some more air, feeling better despite being spotted by one of your patients. The two of you don’t say much at first, sitting in a comfortable silence while staring at the few white dots in your pitch-black sky. 

“Boys are stupid.” She suddenly says, catching you off guard. 

“Why would you say that?” 

“They just are, I think girls cry more often because of them than any other reason.” She explains nonchalantly, making you grin at your words.

“Can’t disagree on that.” You mumble.

After a while, you returned inside to finish one last welfare round before switching out with the night shift nurses. You greet Karina as you pass the nurse station, she holds you back by your arm. “I had a word with Donghyuck about what happened during testing, are you alright?” Admittedly, you were still a bit mad at his choice of actions, but you couldn’t blame him for correcting you on something you did wrong. 

“I will get over it, but thank you for looking out for me.” You grabbed your necessities and walked through the dimmed hospital corridors, making your way quietly through the resting areas of your patients. Most were already asleep, some mumbled soft words while you gently checked their stats and some even bid you a good night before turning around to sleep. 

Once you made your way into room 4, you expected Minnie to have returned when you opened your curtain, but her bed was still empty. You frown, remembering how she mentioned how cold it was and that she should quickly return and sleep the night away. 

After a few confused moments at her bedside, you notice the small but important details surrounding her little sleeping space. 

The rose she received days ago bore no petals and the little teddy bear was stuffed inside the small trash can. The conversation from before replays in your mind, and you take out the handkerchief she had handed you. 

You recognize the handkerchief was part of a goodie bag for a small promotion the hospital held once in a while. The words 2023 on the embroidery make you speed walk towards the storage room where older items were kept for PR. 

The storage room wasn’t a huge mess, but it was evident that someone had roughly opened the stored tissue papers and used a few. Your heart ached, thinking how the young girl must have cried in here, feeling lonely and betrayed.

Without thinking, you put out your pager and send out a notification for a missing patient, running towards the terrace where you last saw her. You kept calling her name, heart hammering in your chest as different thoughts spun in your mind. 

Different nurses and medical staff on the floor start spreading and calling out for Minnie, everyone equally worried for the young teenage girl.

You end up on the eighth floor, briefly informing Mark before rushing off into another hallway, feeling more and more anxious with each passing second. You hear a click from nearby and rush towards the sounds, opening the door to a balcony wordlessly as you freeze, Minnie’s hands on the railing and a devastating look in her eyes.

“Minnie–”

"Don't!" Her voice shakes as she puts one leg over the railing. “I don’t want to hear about how young I am, how much life I have to live. What is the use if no one will love me?”

“Why would no one love you?” You ask softly, still stuck in place, afraid that one wrong move will make her do something irreversible. 

“Because I’m permanently broken. Because I have a scar that will never heal. Because I will have to return to the hospital every few years.” Minnie wasn’t directly looking at you, she was staring down the levels, the tears in her eyes dropping down eight floors.

“But it will heal, Minnie. Both your scar and your life.” You carefully take a step, noticing how she doesn’t flinch at your movement. “Right now, you are in a very tough battle, wanting to look the prettiest for a boy you like, don’t you?” She is quiet.

“And having him see you in a hospital gown, having him not see the best version of you, it hurts, doesn’t it?” She closes her eyes, whispering a small and shaky ‘yes’, but you heard her.

“I used to think like that, too. I used to think that once I meet the love of my life, I have to be perfect already so that he will fall in love with me.” Minnie doesn’t react, even though you are certain she knows you’re closing your distance slowly.

“But I found out, quite recently, that I don’t want to be perfect to be loved. I want him to see me at my weakest, and see how I fight my way through my weaknesses. Don’t you want to show him that you are a fighter, too?” Minnie looks up at you, although she doesn’t say it, her eyes tell you everything you need to know.

“Thank you, Minnie. Give me your hand and I’ll help you down slowly, is that alright?” She nods, giving you a hand before turning around. The action makes her foot slip and she slides off the railing with a scream. You lunge forward, holding her hands as tight as you can. 

“It’s okay, trust me, I will not let go.” You grunt, trying your best to lift her, but she is too heavy for you to pull up alone. “Somebody, help!” You shout out in between reassuring words for Minnie. You feel her trying to climb up, causing her grip on yours to loosen. You shout for help again, begging the skies to help this little girl. You were fighting a rough battle with exhaustion, using every fiber in your being to keep the hold on the girl’s hands. 

You start to lose grip, you shout out for help one more time before you feel a warm body against you, arms surrounding yours and holding onto Minnie’s forearms.

“I got you” Donghyuck speaks to you softly before raising his voice for Minnie to hear. “Minnie, I will count to three, and Nurse Y/N, and I will pull you up. I need you to use your legs to climb up, okay? Everything is alright. We got you.”

You finally look at him and he nods counting to three before you gather all your remaining strength to lift Minnie. The three of you land on the ground of the balcony, most of the landing softened by Donghyuck embracing you both. 

Minnie holds onto you tightly, crying into your chest as she keeps mumbling apologies. You close your eyes to keep your tears in, soothing the girl with strokes through her hair. “Everything will be fine from now on, Minnie. You are a fighter, remember? You will show everyone that you are a fighter, okay?” Donghyuck stands up, typing on his pager before the medical staff comes through the door with a wheelchair, taking the shocked teenager from your arms. 

You are still shaken from everything that happened in the past 10 minutes, your legs and arms have completely given up after all the adrenaline wore out. Donghyuck wordlessly helps you on your feet. “Let’s go, my shift ended as well. I’m taking us home.” His voice was soft again, just like when he told you that he got you in your most fearful moment. 

He tugs you forward, but you don’t budge causing him to shoot you a questioning expression. “I can’t walk anymore.”

You didn’t have any ulterior motives when you said those words, but getting a piggyback home from Donghyuck did feel nice.

It still felt odd, you were sure a week ago that you hated his guts, but now and then, he made your heart flutter like five years ago. The thoughts confused you, making you unsure about how you should act around the man. Avoiding him wasn’t an option for now, although you knew your rotation in the emergency department was coming to an end soon. 

“You have potential.” He suddenly speaks as your apartment complex comes into sight. “You aren’t as fast as Nurse Ningning or as knowledgeable as Nurse Chenle, but you notice the small things about patients.”

“I doubt small things matter as much as accuracy and knowledge in this work field, Dr. Lee.” You mumble into his shoulder.

“You might think so, but I know for a fact that if you didn’t notice those things, we might have lost a lovely person today.” It was hard to find the right words to say, so you stayed quiet and let him continue.

“Your attentiveness saved a life, Y/N. Don’t ever think any less of yourself as a nurse.” Normally, you’d assume he is saying this to mock you, but even without seeing his face, you know he said those words sincerely. 

“Thank you for finding me, Dr. Lee.” You say after he steps out of the elevator on the fifth floor. “It’s hard to miss you when you still shout like an endangered teen girl.” Your heart skips a beat.

“So you remember me?” You don’t know why you’re holding your breath, but you are.

“I didn’t at first, but after all the hints and pieces I got from why you joined the nursing program, together with what happened today, I just followed the string of information and realized that young girl was you.”

He has stopped in front of your apartment and you try to hurry off his back before your roommate sees you, but he doesn’t let you go as smoothly as you thought. Your roommate seemed to have sensed you because the door swung open. Winter looks at you, your arms around his neck, and then Donghyuck himself. Before she can open her mouth to say anything, you rip yourself from Donghyuck’s hold – ignoring the immediate absence of his warmth – and wave him goodbye, slamming the door in his face and shushing Winter.

“Girl, you act fast.” Minjeong throws you a smug grin. 

“Please don’t even start, Winter” Unfortunately for you, her grin only widens.

The two of you continue to argue, unbeknownst to you, Donghyuck was still outside, listening to your little arguments with a chuckle. He stops himself from mumbling how amusing your reaction was, the word ‘cute’ almost escaping his lips. His footsteps start echoing again after your voices fade away, heading home in high need of some back pain-relieving patches.

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