#and why it's important to say it

[alaiis]

Just saw a post that talked about the fact yes disabled people know their limits but it's more complex than that.

And it was about disabled people's agency being stripped away from us. How sometimes we can do thing but they won't let us. Because we're disabled.

And I wanted to comment about another thing on 'disabled people know their limits' but I didn't want to distract from this conversation so making a post instead.

Disabled people know their limits. Except when we don't.

I know it's difficult to say and to hear because it feels like it's the perfect admittance for ableists to strip us of the little autonomy we have.

But I'm disabled and I don't know my limits. But the thing is, other people don't know them either so don't dare them trying to tell me they know better.

Yes this is about late-diagnosed autism but I believe it can be the same for many other disabilities too.

Because I've been taught all my life I'm not disabled actually. So there is no reason I should not be able to do something that other people can do. That I should be able to be the same way.

It's about the constant exhaustion trying to live the way everyone lives and crashing ugly where everyone can't see it because it's too much. But it's about doing that all my life. And knowing only this way of living.

And now that I actually have recognition as a disabled person. Now that I can get accommodations and I'm not expected to do everything everyone does and the same way. I don't know where to start. I don't know what to ask for. And I keep doing the same.

Oh don't get me wrong there are the obvious things. I can wear ear protection now. But what about all the rest? I'm so exhausted constantly, how do I know where it comes from now? It's my whole life.

I finally started having a therapist who can help me with that. Learning my limits first. Learning to get them respected second. But it's taking a lot of time. And I'm still clueless about so many things.

And I'm so damn exhausted.

Disabled people know their limits. Except when we don't.

[madohomurat]

trans women are everywhere and are so eager to be seen and heard but only if they feel safe around you. if you hardly ever have trans women interacting with you, especially online, then consider there might be a reason for that and you should address it

[elegyofthemoon]

It's still surprising to see people say that when they see the upcoming strike post I made that this is the first time they're hearing about it, especially because I've seen several posts now talking about the same strike.

That being said: regardless of what kind of blog you are, please spread the news about the genocide, the strikes, boycotts, etc.

Even if you are a small blog, spreading word allows for more people to know what's going on and also do their part in protests and strikes, and maybe even the right people will be able to do more than what you're able to do.

And reminder: there is an upcoming strike on February 18th-25th. Prepare accordingly, protest, boycott, call your reps, and spread the word so more people are aware.

[noonstate]

i need well meaning cis people to stop attemping to steelman trans healthcare conversations because it basically always ends with them just lying about easily checkable things "no minors are getting irreversible treatments" wrong not true "no minors are having surgery" also false, like instead just say the truth: currently some minors (few, but some) are able to access hrt that will have some irreversible changes on their body, some (even fewer) minors are able to access surgery.

the counter to transphobes screaming "these kids are being irreversibly changed" isn't "no children are accessing this care" it's "puberty is also an irreversible change" and "i think under 18s and even under 16s should be able to make medical decisions actually"

"no minors are accessing this care" means that transphobes can easily point to the examples of minors who are accessing that care, which just make us look like liars. sometimes teenagers and children need to make medical choices on their own. i think a 14 y/o should be able to get an abortion. i think trans kids and teens should be able to have the approriate care, which for some will just be like, picking a new name or haircut, and for some, sure, could be surgery.

[maybe-a-gatto-or-a-catto]

hold on I'll make this my personality for 3 months

[slymanner]

hurt my heart why dontcha.

[tawaifeddiediaz]

i don’t know if i know how to word this properly but basically i just really like that buck’s realization shows older people who might be questioning their sexuality that it’s okay to not know in your thirties or older, but i also really like that it shows younger people that you don’t have to know right here and now and there’s no age you have to know by. i like how it emphasises the fluidity of sexuality in the form of a macho firefighter who hasn’t considered men in any conscious (or even subconscious) light, and i think that’s a very important point to put across

there’s something to be said about finding out that you’re queer in your thirties and i love that 911 is showing us that through buck, and showing us that maybe you might always know through hen, and showing us that maybe you’ve repressed it for a good chunk of your life through michael but there’s also something to be said for the younger viewers who are struggling to label themselves - to know that it’s okay to not know just yet and still be valid, and be a member of the queer community. and there’s also something to be said about seeing a thirty year old man slip into his realization all happy and safe with another firefighter who tried to hide that part of him, and basically i love my lil gay firefighter show

[gdsplicer]

I'm seeing a influx of people using the wording "aroace spectrum" as opposed to aspec, or using aroace as if it covers all aros and aces, like...

Do I really have to explain why that's not as inclusive a move as you'd think it is?

If someone addressed me, a aro, as "under the aroace spectrum", I would be questioning their allyship even if they themselves are aspec because no where in that's sentence did I say I'm also ace.

Using that wording instead of aspec is as much dismissive and hurtful to non-ace aros as it does when people shove our aromanticism under asexuality without thinking on why it's not helpful or disrespectful.

I feel so strongly on demanding that aroness and aceness is seen as separate, on demanding proper recognition and respect for aroallos and non-SAM aros, on demanding that my aroness is seen as enough on its own because calling me ace or aroace is erasure on my identity; It pushes the wrong narrative and box onto my experiences. It promotes misunderstandings on not just aromanticism but also asexuality. It treats my label something not worthy of taking up space in the aro community, in the aspec community, in the queer community.

Stop using 'aroace' or as the umbrella word to cover the aspec community.

[daily-sifloop]

Mmm draw some Sifloop angst please

Day 8: They wouldn't say that... would they?

Credit for the Mal du pays Loop dialogue goes to my amazing best friend <3

[oraclenthusiast]

everyone wants batman to be treated like a human and have him lose to his kids... personally i think dc should lean into his unbelievable wins. need to defeat this insanely powerful supervillain? call batman. need to fight god? batman. no explanation whatsoever, just him winning quite literally impossible fights. sic him on capitalism next.

[soleminisanction]

I think my least favorite internet criticism of Meghan Fitzmartin is the idea that she "just wanted to push her ship," meaning Tim/Bernard. Because honestly? I think that's straight-up bullshit.

Having read the Urban Legends stories, the Pride Special reprint, Tim Drake: Robin and Young Justice Dark Crisis, plus what interviews and social media she's been doing as these comics came out, there is zero evidence to me to back that statement up. If that were true, the Urban Legends stories probably would've been more about bringing Bernard back and re-establishing him as a character. Y'know, building up their relationship.

But it wasn't about their relationship. It was about Tim and his feelings, his internal conflict, what he needed. That's what Fitzmartin even said in the interviews after, that she, "felt like this was something Tim needed." And that's true going into TD:R too -- yeah, Bernard is there and their relationship is a prominent subplot, but he gets about as much page time as Darcy and Detective Williams, and the focus is always on Tim's ongoing story and his developing relationships with all the people around him.

That's why I like that they went with Bernard as his "closet key." Not because I'm super devoted to the pairing or anything -- I truly could take or leave the arrangement -- but because they're tolerably cute together and, more importantly, dating a civilian supporting character comes with far less baggage than establishing a relationship with a fellow hero. By their very nature, superhero stories are more heavily weighted towards the hero characters than their civilian support, that's just a fact, and, with rare exception, civilian love interests tend to act more as sounding boards to develop and reflect the leads. Making Tim's first boyfriend an old civilian friend means the story could be about Tim's personal character growth, internal conflict, and explorations of his sexuality.

I genuinely think that's the only reason Fitzmartin went with Bernard. She only had around 30 pages to tell that Urban Legends story (and I guarantee you, she was assigned that page count before writing), so bringing back a previous civilian friend meant she didn't have to try to establish a whole new relationship on top of introducing a villain faction and telling a superhero-based investigation story. And for whatever reason, Bernard was the most popular of Tim's civilian buddies to rare-pair him with before this all happened. (Just check AO3: Prior to the release of the Urban Legends stories, Tim/Bernard had ~42 fics, Sebastian Ives got 4, and Danny Temple had 1.)

When Meghan Fitzmartin says that she went back, read Tim's old stories, and felt he needed to come out of the closet, I believe her. And I'm happy she felt that way and was allowed to act on those feelings because it's something I felt too, reading those stories. Those feelings that had nothing to do with "ships" or even with characters like Kon or Dick and everything to do with Tim and who he is as a person.

To sweep all that away as "she just wants to push her preferred ship" just feels so... dismissive and rude.

[shootingst4rpress]

the reason so many modern ‘feminist’/’gay’ retellings of classic stories or mythology are shit is because no-one wants to actually engage with a work on its own terms anymore. nobody wants to actually analyse and dig into the themes of a work they just want to plaster over it with what they consider self serving and ‘trendy.’ so instead of actually ANALYSING what a myth could say about women, or gay people, or society at the time in general, it just gets rewritten again and again to say what the author wants it to say. braindead fucking culture

[mumblesplash]

heartbreaking: this viral post is saying things you completely agree with in the most irritating way possible

[shimmershy]

Buttercups and Golden Flowers

[cemeterything]

my feelings on romance really aren't complex tbh. i enjoy making meaningful and long lasting connections with people and i've definitely loved some of them in ways that wouldn't be considered platonic by an outside observer, but when it comes to the concept of "romance" and romantic relationships i'm just like

[tippenfunkaport]

That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.

Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."

The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.

And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?