#anyway. made some progress on the fic. the little fic. i dont really know where it's going or when it's done bc its meant 2 be shorter

[cerealmonster15]

drawing a scene from the fic ive been writing today

[osleeplessflowero]

It's been long enough, time to bring back some content for this series. I hope you all enjoy! (Also yay new lily divider! Gonna start putting these around my notes from now on :] credits are in the tags!)

*Notes - Reader Soultype: Bravery🧡 - Reader Gender: Ambiguous, They/Them pronouns by default - Horror goes by Sans - Context from the first two parts is needed for this one to make sense - Words: 3,906

☕Previous Part☕ 🎃First Part 🪓Oneshot Masterpost/List 💜💙 In-Progress Fics Masterpost/List💚💛

Content Warning: Swearing, Violence, Light Blood

A while passed since your coffee meetup with Sans. You've been texting each other pretty much daily, discussing this and that and getting a good laugh out of each other from time to time. He's been really supportive of you since your emotions from your breakup had started hitting you like a truck, bringing your spirits back up when they started to spiral. You really appreciate him for that..

At the moment, you're currently sitting in your living room and replying to the last message your skeleton companion sent you. The two of you had been having a long conversation about something obscure he found, before the topic shifted to meeting his brother, like you'd asked about when you went to go get coffee. Upon being informed, Sans said he was delighted at the idea, and wanted to invite you over for dinner. You eagerly accepted, but not without saying you'd want to bring something over as well.. call it a gift exchange. Perhaps dessert would be best, since he's really looking forward to making dinner.

Thing is, you have no idea what this guy likes, so you don't know how well your decision making could be..

i mean i could just go to the store with you if you need help picking it aint like i have shit to do

You perk up at his reply, grinning. That's perfect! If anybody would know what he likes, it'd be him. And it's an excuse to hang out a little earlier than expected.

sounds awesome, where should we meet? i could just come pick you up tho idk if ur comfortable with me knowing where u live i mean its not like youd be coming over to kidnap me lmao i dont mind sent attachment sick ok i think i know where that is ill be there in a few alrrr i'll get ready then

You hop up from your seat on the couch, walking into your room and picking out some warm clothes so you're comfortable outside. The air has definitely gotten more and more chilly after Halloween, and you're not quite sure if you like that sensation or not.

Hopping a bit to pull on your shoes, you hear your doorbell ring and drop your leg to walk over and look through the peephole. Sure enough, you're met with the skeleton waiting with a bored expression before you open the door.

"Hey! Wow, I didn't think you'd get here so quick." You muse, earning a chuckle from the skeleton as you step aside to let him in out of the cold. Can skeletons feel temperatures? You assume not because of the lack of skin.

He puts his hands in his pockets as he enters, watching you close the door behind him. "i took a shortcut, didn't take long at all. nice place."

"Thanks, it's nothing big, but it's home. That's all that matters, right?" You smile, walking to your bathroom and heading inside to fix your hair how you like it (if you have any, that is.) You leave the door open, glancing over briefly when he stands in the doorway to speak with you.

"yeah, doesn't matter what size. home's a home, anyway." His eyelight drifts around as he inspects what he can see, learning a little bit more about you from observing some of your favorite things. You give him a smile before exiting the bathroom, walking over to the front door to hold it open for him. He follows you out silently, and the two of you begin your walk down the street.

"So..does he like any particular kinds of desserts? Cakes, cookies, brownies, etcetera.. throw me a bone here." You hold up your phone and open your notes app so you can get an idea of what to look for.

"well, anything made from the heart's gonna appeal to him right off the bat. but if you wanna go for something he'll really like.. he loves sugar cookies. like the kind with icing, he eats those up when i get 'em." He smiles, thinking back to a memory. You nod, saving "sugar cookies" to your phone. If you're gonna bake, then it's gotta be something he'd love! That's one way to win him over.

"Sugar cookies it is! Any specific kind of frosting flavor?"

There's a pause. You wait patiently, but when Sans' reply never comes, you look up at his face. His eyes have gone blank, almost like he'd shut down.

"Sans? Are you alright?"

"just..hang on, i..i know it's in there. i know i can remember that, i know i can." He speaks softly, and you frown, stopping in place and stopping him as well.

"Hey. Don't worry if you can't remember. I'll figure something out, don't strain yourself. It's okay, Sans." You reach your hands up, placing them on his shoulders with a reassuring smile. His eyelight slowly reforms in his eye, warbling a bit before returning to its usual large shape.

"..okay. thanks."

You nod, leading the big skeleton along until you finally reach your destination: the grocery store. A nostalgic song plays as you both hear the doors slide open, granting you both access. Thankfully not too many people are inside at the moment, which gives you more room to look and gives Sans a bit more peace.

Seeing as you probably won't need a bunch of ingredients, you settle for a basket and begin walking to look for the baking section. Sans simply walks right beside you, ignoring any stares from other people inside.

"Okay, sugar cookies..I need a box with a mix..I'm not getting the frozen ones, I just wanna make these myself. I could get some red icing maybe, like strawberry? Or cherry? Is there cherry icing? I'm sure there is." You mutter to yourself as you walk, unaware of Sans' fond smile as he watches you talk, making sure to pay attention in case you ask him something out of the blue.

"I could make cute little patterns on them- ooor I could just cover them..I dunno, we'll see how I feel when the baking starts." You smile, reaching your hand up to try and grab a box of the mix you need, but frown when you can't reach it. Gonna need a step stool..

Sans leans a little over you from behind, putting a hand on your shoulder and reaching up to grab the box for you. You smile up at him, thanking him promptly as he shrugs it off. You should ask him to shop with you more often, it'd definitely be easier than climbing the shelves. You used to do that when you were younger, and had gotten caught a few times..well, you won't get caught again!

You look through some different cookie cutters, debating cutting the cookies into shapes, and if so, what shapes in particular to use. Your peace is interrupted when you hear quiet whispering a good distance away, furrowing your brows when you overhear what some people are saying.

Sans tries to pretend not to notice, but you can tell it's really starting to bother him..

You hold out your arm. He looks at you with confusion, raising a browbone.

"Take my arm in yours." You whisper, earning even more confusion. "C'mon, just do it!"

He holds out his arm slightly, and you take that as a cue to wrap yours around it, walking with him down another aisle. When you walk beside the few whispering, you glare daggers at them before looking over some different cookie cutters that are much more to your liking, wondering why they hadn't put them where you were. Poor organization..

Sans keeps his skull turned away, a mix of a blue and red flush covering his cheekbones as he avoids looking at your face. You don't seem to notice, which he's admittedly a bit thankful for.

"Okay! I think that's all that I-"

You hear your name being called, stopping mid sentence. Your eyes quickly dart over to the source, spotting him..

Your Ex.

Your grip tightens on Sans' arm. He snaps back to reality, looking between you and them before realizing. You glare at him as he approaches.

"So. One day you just ditch me out of the blue and now you're hanging out with monster trash. Man, I didn't think you'd stoop that low."

"Shut up. Nobody cares what you have to say. You're the only one who's trash here. Just leave me alone, and get out of my life."

"Woah, easy." He holds up his hands in mock defense. "Got me shaking in my boots, babe! So scary.."

"Yeah, still scared after we spooked the shit out of you in the haunted house?" You tilt your head, a sly smile on your face. His face darkens, and his brows furrow.

"Whatever- Look, you-"

"I just want you to leave me alone. The only reason you finally want to spend time with me now is because I'm gone. You had your chance with me, and now I'm spending my time with way better people. We are through, we will always be through, so leave me be."

"You really think a monster is better than me? You're kidding yourself! Just.. look at him. He's probably an actual axe murdere-"

You move before you can think, punching him square in the nose and watching him stumble. It isn't until you see his blood on your hand and his widened eyes that you realize what you just did, quickly ushering Sans away and pulling him to the checkout section. You have what you need, time to get out of here.

It's quiet as you pay, before you both leave the store. Sans tugs a little on your hand, so you stop, facing him as you calm your breathing down.

"..you okay?" He sounds a little worried.

"Yeah. I'm..I'm alright, now. Are.. you okay?"

"you just punched a guy for me." He states, a smile creeping onto his face.

"Well, yeah. I hate him and he was being a jerk, of course I did. Nobody messes with the people I care about." You grab some napkins from the bag, wiping away your ex's blood as you both make your way across the street.

Sans bumps your hand with his, so you unclench your fingers, allowing him to hold it. ..He's..never done that before. That's new.

Heat rises to your face, and you pray to anyone above that it doesn't show. That's all you need right now.

You enter your home, turning on the lights. "Just go wherever, my house is your house and all that jazz. I'm gonna wear something for baking." You smile, walking to your room. He gives you a thumbs up before you go, sitting down on your couch and covering his face with his hands.

Stars, feelings are complicated. You just made his soul do a somersault twice in a row without even meaning to. It's not fair, why does he have to feel so- conflicted?! He moves his hands down, groaning before taking a deep breath as you walk back in.

"Okay. You wanna bake with me?" You smile innocently, completely unaware of the rollercoaster looping around in his skull. He nods, walking into the kitchen after you, simply watching as you grab an apron and set the oven up for baking.

Several seconds of ingredient hunting later, you set everything out on the counter and get to work. Crack the eggs, add some butter, throw in some oil.. mix. You move around like a robot, earning an amused chuckle from the skeleton as he sits on the same counter to watch you, sending some ingredients over when you need them using magic.

Once you have the cookie dough mixed up properly, you smack his hand away once with a spatula to make sure he doesn't try and snatch any up. Your focus then shifts to the icing, making a bit of a mess as you stir. A bit of it lands on your face that you don't seem to notice, but a certain someone with you does.

"hey, c'mere." He slides off the counter with ease, making you stop in your tracks. He holds his hand up to your cheek, resting his thumb over a small bit of icing. He pauses for a moment, the two of you staring into each other's eyes. Heat rushes to both of your faces, his cheekbones erupting in a blue and red mixed blush as he raises his thumb to his mouth, allowing his mixed tongue to lick away the icing in question.

Oh. Oh man.

You avert your eyes when he does, focusing back on the icing. That's new. A lot of things are new today.

The tension eventually fades out once the cookies have been brought out, now cut into lovely different shapes Sans is sure Papyrus will love. He shares a few stories he can remember from the past, you happily listening along and sometimes replying with witty comebacks to his jokes.

Time flies, and finally the cookies are finished, ready to eat! You almost feel kinda bad that these'll be gone soon..but it'll be worth it if he likes them! You hang up your apron, grinning slyly when you turn back to Sans. He raises a browbone in your direction, when you place a small bit of icing on his nose. He laughs, a determined glint to his eye as he tries to get some of the leftover stuff on you, the two of you chasing each other around the kitchen before you erupt into laughter.

He looks up from the floor at you, and his breath hitches. You have a really nice smile..he should tell you that some time. Not yet, though. No..it's too soon for that.

You grin, licking any leftover icing on you and walking to your room to change into the clothes you'd set out previously for when you go with Sans back to his house. Alright, first impressions are everything! Gotta look nice for the occasion.

Sans stares at the ceiling for a little bit while he waits for you, trying to remember some obscure TV show he watched once as a child with his brother he just can't seem to put a name on. You eventually walk back into the room, determined and ready to go. You walk into the kitchen and grab the lovely bowl of cookies you baked, holding it under your arm.

"So, shall we walk?" You smile as he walks up to you, but then raise a brow in confusion when he shakes his head. Maybe he'd prefer driving? You didn't see a car outside, though..

"i know a faster way to get there, if you're okay with it."

"Sure. What is it?"

"hold my arm for a sec. you might feel kinda dizzy for a little bit." He offers his arm to you, and you accept it quickly.

"OkaaAAAY-" You panic when the ground disappears from beneath your feet, holding onto him tightly and squeezing your eyes shut. It is only when you're back on the ground that you open them, glancing around. ..You appear to be in someone's driveway, someone who owns a very lovely home.

"aaaand we're here. tada." He grins, letting you regain your balance. How did he do that? When did he learn he could do that? Why did he not tell you he could do that befo- that's how he got to your house so fast. Of course. A "shortcut".

"You're really amazing, Sans." You smile up at him, chuckling a little to yourself when he looks away. He leads you up the porch steps to the front door, knocking in a rhythmic pattern and waiting for a moment before it swings abruptly open.

"AH! Brother, There You Are!" The much-taller-than-you'd-expected skeleton exclaims, pushing up his glasses a bit so he can see better. "And You've Brought The Human Along With You! Excellent! I've Just Gotten Started On Tonight's Dinner. Do Come Inside! It's Certainly Much Warmer Than It Is Out There. Sans, You Both Didn't Walk, Did You? It's Easy For Humans To Get Colds!"

You both smile at his rambling as Sans reassures him that he used a shortcut to get here. He's a total contrast to his brother, a ball of energy to counter his brother's overall tired and "lazy" demeanor.

Papyrus gestures for you to walk in, you both promptly remove your shoes at the door when you see that there are a few pairs of boots there already. You can assume literally all of them belong to Papyrus, because Sans is usually either wearing slippers or sneakers.

"Ah! Where Are My Manners." He clasps his gloved hands together, grinning down at you. "I Am The Great Papyrus! I'm Certain My Brother Has Told You About Me Already." He grins, his braces shining when the light of the ceiling fan above him hits them.

You smile, moving one of your arms to hold it out to shake his hand, watching him eagerly grab it. "It's nice to meet you in person, Papyrus." You tell him your name, and he makes sure to remember it for next time.

"Sans told me you were really looking forward to making dinner tonight, sooo I thought I'd bake some cookies! We can have them after dinner's over with, and you guys can keep them for a while until you run out. And if you like them, well..I'd be more than happy to make some more."

Papyrus gasps, putting a hand where his heart would be, as if he'd been struck right through it. "Oh, That's So Kind Of You! And Fitting For The Occasion! You Can Place Them On The Counter For Now, There Should Be An Open Space."

You do as instructed, admiring all the lovely little details in the home. They certainly tell you plenty about the two, and the things they like.. There's a ton of pretty patterns in the wood in some parts of the kitchen, presumably crafted by Paps himself. There are some red gingham curtains gently blowing with the breeze from outside before he closes the windows, and you briefly catch a glance of a clothesline with drying clothes. Huh, Papyrus must be into cosplay. That's cool!

Sans spooks you, giving you a pat on the shoulder as he walks up to his room. Ooh..this gives you an opportunity to see it..you would hate to pry, though. Maybe another time you can. You'll definitely be visiting later.

Deciding not to pester him, you focus your attention on Papyrus, who's happily humming a tune you don't recognize and cooking up something that makes your mouth water.

"So," His voice catches you off guard, making you jolt. "How'd It Happen?"

"How'd..what happen, exactly?" You smile, leaning a bit on the counter to watch him work.

"How'd You Meet, And How'd You Convince My Brother To Think So Fondly Of You?"

"We met at a- wait, he thinks fondly of me?"

"Well, Of Course He Does! Don't Tell Me You're As Blind As I Am Without Glasses." He lets out a nyeh-heh, stirring something. "He Talks About You Quite Often!"

"He does?.." Your voice is soft when you ask, heat creeping back up to your cheeks before you shake your head to try and make it go away.

"Indeed! Now, I'll Repeat The Other Part..How'd You Meet? I'm Very Curious About That."

"Well, it all started when me and my..well, he's my ex now-"

"Oh, Is This Drama? Now I've Certainly Got To Hear About This. I Love A Little Bit Of Gossip." He grins slyly, and you let out a laugh before going into detail about everything.

Papyrus is such a lovely person to talk to, even if you have to repeat what you say a few times because of his hearing problems. You can definitely understand why Sans thinks so highly of his brother.

Speaking of Sans, he finally joins you both downstairs after a while, having changed into an almost exact replica of the clothes he had been wearing before but much cleaner. Look at him, getting dressed up for the occasion..

Papyrus finishes making his masterpiece, and you all sit down at the table together. It's such a warm environment..Sans cracking jokes, Papyrus groaning but making a few of his own in return..the two sharing fond stories from the past..Papyrus talking about his work and what he loves to do..you could listen to him for hours. The food is immaculate, and you fight the urge to groan with delight at the taste.

When dinner is finished, you send your compliments to the chef, and the taste test for the cookies begins..you stare with anxious anticipation as he inspects a skull-shaped cookie, amused by your choice before biting into it. Silence fills the room before he grins in your direction, putting his hands on his hips.

"This Is Excellent! You Did Wonderfully! Stars, I May Run Out Of These Within The Week! GAH!" He puts his hands on his skull, you and Sans letting out a laugh at his expressions.

"Don't worry, Paps. I'll definitely make some more for you later."

"Wonderful! You Simply Must Show Me How You Make Them. They're Exquisite!"

"Maaybe..but good magicians never reveal their secrets, do they?" You smile slyly. He gasps in understanding, before placing his fist against his palm.

"Right. Fair Enough!"

You don't realize how fast time flies when you're having fun. You could spend eternity with these guys, without changing a thing. They're both so much fun to be around, and..it's really nice, being surrounded by such caring people.

Before you know it you're sitting on the couch, listening to Papyrus ramble about scandals in the monster celebrity world, promptly gasping when you hear something shocking. Sans simply watches the both of you with a lazy smile, chiming in from time to time before you all focus on whatever movie's playing on the TV.

One movie turns into several..

You feel your eyes slowly close as you lean against something big and warm, relaxing with a smile.

Sans freezes when he looks down at you, holding his hands in the air and unsure where to put them. Papyrus scoffs, motioning for him to put his arm around you. Sans looks at him with an expression that screams "are you crazy?!" before Papyrus shoots one back, rolling his eyes and waving him off before whispering a good night to him and heading upstairs. Fuck. What does he do? He couldn't just..could he?

His eyelight darts around until it rests on your sleeping form. He sighs for a moment, before abruptly shortcutting to your house and ensuring that the doors are locked, reappearing in the spot he had been sitting in before. You readjust your position, getting even closer this time.. His face flushes again as he lowers an arm over you, unable to look away. Oh jeez.. Ain't this complicated? Well..lots of things are, aren't they?

Hearing your soft breathing leaves him feeling calm..content. He's..alright with this. He'll embrace the moment for a little while, while it lasts. He focuses on the screen, until his eyes begin to close as well..maybe a nap wouldn't hurt.

[sweetronancer]

HI PERCY HI PERCY!!!

i dare you to tell me about some of your wips right now >:33

HI OMG HELP I CHOKED ON MY CHIPS WHEN I SAW THE NOTIF /POS

most of my wips are like literally song lyrics from my fav songs so like ig im just gonna put those because like! it makes it easier ahh (90% of my wips are unnamed though smh)

"the last time i caught my own reflection was on its way to meet you." - (ronance) jealous nancy fic? i really only have an opening sentence for it but i plan on working on it more soon. but like robin's all buddy buddy (ALMOST girlfriends) with vickie and nancy doesn't like it whatsoever, like she feels like her best friend (cough crush cough oh ahah who said that?) is getting stolen from her and stuff and she's really jealous obv.

"so stay with me, hold my hand. theres no need to be brave," - (ronance) its like post st4, robin is doing some very intense thinking and its like an angst doughnut thats fluff filled yk? wound tending and sapphic yearning like what more do you need? its like one of my favorites but i'm really stuck on one spot and i don't know how to get past it, as soon as i finish the wip i will like immediately post it on ao3 so like?!?! i'm really excited to post it ahh

"theres something about you i'll always recognize." - (ronance) IM SO SO SO TEMPTED TO JUST POST THE LITTLE TOTALLY SEPARATE SCENE I WROTE FOR THIS ON ITS OWN LIKE ON HERE BUT LIKE (i might actually..)! also i posted a little bit of it on here already but not much, just some progress i've made. but like robin is so desperately trying to become friends with nancy after st3 (i think thats like where i wanna set it in the timeline) and like it starts with jancy.. and robin wanted to cry- LIKE LIKE WHEN UHM ROBIN CAME OUT TO STEVE YK thats how she feels in this fic lmao!!!

i also have a google doc titled "crying" like help?? but anyway its like ronance angst.. this is literally how it goes bro! almost developed ronance, jancy affair (sort of), rovickie, platonic ronance, developed ronance!!! i dont know how to explain the plot or sum it up but like thats it, i guess i tried to make an angst pizza or something?

i swear i didn't yap to so much so like im gonna stop there but i have so many wips i have ideas for and like i wanna talk about so badly but i i dont like yapping about that on here because ig i feel selfish help?? idek how but yeah help

[maiverie]

HI DO U HAVE ANY TIPS ON STARTING A TUMBLR BLOG? like how you format your links and everything i'm new and want to start a blog but don't know how 😭😭

hi anon!!! omg sure yes I dooo!!! when I started I didn't have anyone to help me so it was literally such a shitshow lmfao so I HOPE THIS HELPS!!

— (long post below)

disclaimer: this is all based on my experience and im sure there are other users with better tips than me so DONT TAKE MY WORD FOR GOSPEL BAHAHA

(also I'm going to assume you reached out to me because you want to start a kpop writing blog and not smth else, so all these tips are obv specific to writing blogs. I also don't know how experienced u are w Tumblr so I might say some obvious things,, sorry if you already know most of these things!!)

anyway tumblr is actually really intuitive and after about two days I honestly think you'll get it (probably even within a day tbh). here are some quick steps I feel like make sense in my mind:

find a url (if you're starting a kpop writing blog,, most people seem to include the name/a reference to their bias but in my case i kinda just went w my name and played around w it until I liked it 😭 you can also search for "url ideas" in tumblr if you're having trouble!!) keep in mind you can literally change it at any point in time so don't worry about choosing the -perfect- one

set up your blog! most of the time, people have a navigation post (the pinned post where everything is linked so readers can navigate ur blog easily), a masterlist (a post that shows everything you've ever written), a wip list (a post that lists all your works in progress, so fics you're currently writing and want to publish in the near future). additionally, people have a post about themselves (like an about me section with blog rules and stuff. this is my old old one). personally, i have a carrd right now (this is mine here) and you'll find other users have one or the other!

set up your navigation post: hyperlink honestly everyone's different (btw don't worry about taking these tips too seriously bc honestly u should do whatever you want on your blog — it's yours after all!!) but I think most people include their name, pronouns, age (sometimes), timezone (sometimes) and hyperlinks to their masterlist + wip list.

how to hyperlink im sure you've done it before for school, but it's really easy! here's a demonstration — this link will send you to my navi, and this link will send you to one of my fics! to do it, you just need to copy the link of whatever post you're trying to hyperlink (three dots in the top right of the post -> "copy link"), typesomething, double click onto the word you're trying to link it to, tap the 🔗 button, and copy the link into that! (in this example, it'd look like this: something.)

how to make ur navi neat/pretty personally, I used to just search for moodboards (on tumblr) and pick 3 photos that I really liked (obviously give credit to whoever made the moodboard!). what I have now is just something that I designed but you can have one or the other, it doesn't really matter! other tips I think I'd suggest is to keep it as simple as possible; you can embellish it later but make sure it's easy to read and people can see all the links! I really like searching for "symbols" on Tumblr, and then there are cute lil symbols u can add to your post :) or just use emojis! or dashes! this might be a little ahead, but I have a tutorial on gradient text if you really care, but maybe focus on the base first :D just as an example, my moot @.hazyyu has a really pretty navi!

apply the same principles to your masterlist + wip list + about me just search for symbols, add whatever images you think look pretty, search for "line breaks" on Tumblr and there are pictures of links you can use to divide stuff up! making a carrd is easy but time-consuming (just search on YouTube "carrd tutorial")

there are other caveats to a writing blog, but those were just the basics! here are some other things I thought I could mention:

a permanent taglist is a list of people you tag every single time you publish a story/update it (for the purpose of them being notified every time you post) — sometimes people will ask u to "add me to your permanent taglist!" which just means tag them every time you post a story. personally, I have a google form for anyone that wants to be on the permanent taglist, but I didn't do that initially — I used to just wait until people sent in an ask asking to be on it and then I'd have a separate post with everyone who did. for example, this was my old one! doesn't matter whichever approach you do ^^

people also organise their blog via the hashtags I do this too! it's so much easier that way :)) for example, every time I get an ask, I tag it with "#ask" (umm a lot of people are much more creative w their tags but personally icb lmaoo — here's an example of my friend who used a different tag and it's really pretty!). if you want help with organising your blog w tags, here's an explanation I wrote a while back!

if you want help promoting your work, you should consider joining a few networks! these are basically big big blogs that reblog all your work so more people can see ur stuff ^^ here are some of the ones I'm a part of: kflixnet, enhanet, k-labels!

you'll meet other users along the way and call them your moots; most of the time this just means you interact w them a lot via asks/dms. personally I'm not really active and I kinda find it hard to keep track of a lot of moots so I stick to myself and interact w anyone that comes my way!! but bae u can do whatever u want!! go find blogs of people that seem rlly cool and send an ask and just see where it goes; just don't badger people, be nice and I think you'll pick up on sm things naturally!!!

ur blog is gna look great!!! let me know when you finish setting it up!!! I hope this helps 😋💖

[devondespresso]

WIP Ask Game

tagged by the lovely @itsthestrangestthings and with perfect timing too! I've just finished the outline for the next arc and need to get words down

Rules

In a reblog of this post (so people can find you in the notes) or new thread (w/ rules attached) if you want to play on your own, post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to play!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can't share from (for example, an event or gift fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

(per usual I only have my one wip, so I'll be listing scenes from my Steve Henderson AU instead of different files. I'm also listing them with the short details i remember them by because they dont really have names lol)

Scenes

The Old Office (where's dustin's dad?)

Before Bed (we try and fail to talk about important things)

Family Dinner (with a side of overthinking)

Nightmare, but worse (for the love of god just talk about things)

Breakdown in the club(house) (as in the little play fort in dustins backyard)

Snippet

(and tags below)

Most of my work in the last 7 days has been trying to figure out what has been feeling off in some of my scenes i already jotted down, then putting together the outline for my next arc, so im being pretty loose with "words in the past 7 days" Chucks of this snippet were the most I've rewritten recently, but I'm definitely sharing more than just the rewritten parts because i can (Steve and Hopper has been one of my favorite dynamics to explore, especially within the context of the hospital and Hop's background)

___

But then a nurse came in, asking if his parents had been notified of his admission. She offered to call if they hadn’t yet, but Hopper promised he would take care of it.

He stood by the wall waiting for someone to pick up on the other line while Steve sat on the side of the bed and El curled up in a guest chair nearby.  Hop stood there listening to several minutes of dialing sounds and voicemail over and over with no sign of stopping.

“If they won't pick up after 5 minutes they're not going to pick up after 10."

Hop glared over.

"Thank you, Harrington, very helpful." he grumbled but still gave up and set the phone back.

“Just tell the nurse they know and don’t worry about it.” he offered, laying back down.

“Yeah and just leave ‘em in the dark about their kid in the damn hospital.” 

“I’ll call them later.”

Hopper huffed from the other side of the room. Steve tried not to focus on it, but after too long of a silence, especially after the building frustration, he had to look over.

Hop stood silent, leaned back against the wall. A mixture of thinking and working through his frustrations.

An unnerving amount of thinking for Hop, and his expressions were harder to read than most, having his own more subtle tells Steve hadn't known him long enough to recognize.

He looked over at Steve, gathering clues or something. Steve shot a face back, asking for an explanation.

He thought for a moment, then crossed his arms and walked over to him.

“Why don’t you want anyone here?”

Steve scooted back, sat up and crossed his arms back.

“Because it’s not that big of a deal-”

“That's a load of bull.”

Steve rolled his eyes, projecting annoyance to say This is not going to go anywhere.

“I’ve already dealt with a concussion on my own before and, surprise, it was fine.”

“That’s not it.” he said slow and cold: the tone he used to shut down that argument with Mike. “Tell me why.”

“I told you!” he said, pushing down more nerves to throw that tone back at him.

"No, you haven't."

"Well, what do you want me to say!"

“The truth, Harrington!” he yelled.

Steve froze in place, holding the scowl in place, keeping his eyes glued to Hopper to hide his reaction. Hopper caught himself, sighing and looking away in a self-directed disappointment. Only after the break in tension did Steve look away, staring at the wall.

Calm down, it was an accident. He didn’t mean to.

“I just want to know the truth, kid.” he backed up a good few feet, leaning back against the wall and looking at him firmly, “Because I can’t think of anyone who’d want to be completely alone in a hospital. Let alone a kid.”

He’s not like that, he’s trying not to be. He’s stopped.

His throat was tight and he could feel tears invading his eyes.

Not here, not here, not here

“You trying to prove something?” Hop guessed, taking his silence for stubbornness. He can work with that.

Steve threw a glare at him, getting up and going to the room’s bathroom, putting a lot of effort into appearing completely steady despite the dizziness. Hopper followed.

“Kid, I'm just trying to help.” He said, putting a hand on the door to keep him from opening it.

He’s not gonna drop it. Not trusting his voice to hold, Steve ripped out his wallet and shoved over a business card. Hop took it with his free hand, confusion distracting him enough to let Steve yank the door open and slip inside.

“Harringt-”

He slammed the door right behind him with a loud thud that made his breath catch. He quickly locked it, then held his breath a moment and closed his eyes. Then he breathed out slowly, quietly, and flicked the light on. Waited to hear Hopper’s footsteps leading away from the door back towards the phone before opening his eyes again.

Finally

___

Tags

@stobinesque @fag4dykestobin @museumgiftshoperaser @sharpbutsoft @spicysix @blushweddinggowns @marvel-ous-m @alexcharmsyou

(no pressure ofc 💕💕)

[reidmania]

hey just wanted to talk about your recent post in regards to animals in captivity :3 im quite passionate ab this subject so i apologise if i come across kinda aggressive!!!! thats not my intention at all i just like talking ab this stuff :D

i did enjoy your fic because you’re right!!!!! places like seaworld, where animals are kept in much too small enclosures and forced to tricks, are a huge issue. i really appreciate what you had to say on that topic in particular!

but, i personally really dont like all the hate that zoos and aquariums get by association. there are definitely cases to be made for larger animals such as sharks/whales/elephants, but something that you have to remember is that zoos+aquariums are conservation efforts! most animals that are in captivity are either born there and have no concept of the outside world, or were injured in such a severe case that they can not be released. zoos and aquariums (at least repeatable ones) try their absolute hardest to meet every one of their animals needs, and rehabilitate them if possible.

not only this, but these institutions also have programs that work towards rebuilding endangered populations and reintroducing them into the wild!! an example of this would be the american black-footed ferret, which was successfully reintroduced, but there are programs happening right now for even more animals. without things like zoos & aquariums, we wouldn’t have all this amazing research and progress!

my final point is the education opportunities that these places bring :3 i adore animals and when i was younger, i went to a zoo camp program every summer! i learned so much about animals and ecological conservation that helped me become so passionate about it today !

sorry this ask is a little all over the place i have a lot of thoughts!!!! please know that i am not trying to tear you down for your story, it just got me excited and wanting to talk ! thank u so much for reading :3

do not apologise bc its a topic that definitely needs to be talked about!!

i agree with a lot of what you said, zoo’s and aquariums are definitely not all bad!!. if you look at my comments on the post i made before that fic i mention that i understand that these institutions need to make money in order to be able to continue helping & providing these animals with care, and they make that money by doing shows or by people paying to see them.

some places are really really great in the way they care for their animals, and i completely agree that they are a great way to learn and become more educated on animals and etc and im sure they are not all bad in anyway what so ever.

In saying that the whole point of the fic (which was mainly about orca’s) was that i got the idea for it after watching blackfish which was a documentary about how horrible these orca’s were treated — and at that point in time SeaWorld was not rescuing their animals, they were capturing these animals, stealing them away from their parents, and then putting them through the worst stuff and actively spreading misinformation about these animals, saying stuff like 25% of orcas have flopped over dorsal fins when in the wild its less then 1%.

also saying that they live 25-30 years. When in the wild they can live to over 100. they would act like these werent wild animals, & these animals were being used for shows, then isolated.

Also i think its mentioned in the fic but these orca’s all come from different families, and pods which means they all have completely different sets of vocalisations which is how they communicate with each other and because of that they wouldn’t understand each other so they were still isolated!! which is the case with a lot of places, they can say the animals r with their ‘family’ but a lot of the time its just the same species put together in a close proximity.

they were punished by being starved, males were used purely to breed and then those babies would be ripped away from their mothers & sold to some place else. and dolphins being used for shows back then, trainers standing on their noses as an act, when that can do sooo much damage to dolphins jaws.

i think rehabilitation & rehab centres are great for all animals, and zoo’s or aquariums who rescue and genuinely care for their animals are great. theres definitely multiple sides to it and a lot has definitely changed since the backfish documentary came out, it just had me very frustrated. the places that rescue their animas & then if those animals can be released (and would survive) and they release them, those places have my respect but this is definitely not the case for every place.

thank you for giving me something to yap about!!

[the-bat-collector]

SUPERBAT Rec List!! AU NO POWERS ish PART 2

No Powers or No Capes (There are some minor exceptions but I think this still applies)

Soo it’s become harder to find these fics and I kept postponing making this list just in case I found moreeeee. After some time convincing myself I decided that If I find more I’ll just make a part 3.

Here is the link to Part 1 Post

So without further ado. Here you go!

Storge by ichikonohakko @ichikonohakko

G - 3,310

Storge (storgē, Greek: στοργή) is liking someone through the fondness of familiarity, family members or people who relate in familiar ways that have otherwise found themselves bonded by chance. An example is the natural love and affection of a parent for their child.

Or the story of how Clark Kent meets the Wayne family children.

So this was in my mark for later and I read it as I was making this list and it’s very cute and adorable and highly recommend it! 

don't you know an apparition is a cheap date by knoxoursavior  @clqrkkent

E - 39,385

Clark has been able to see ghosts since he was eight, just a few days before his Pa died in his sleep. Years later, after having moved to the city with Martha to pursue writing, Clark meets Bruce Wayne, who takes an interest in his work and Clark in particular. Not long after they meet, Bruce asks Clark to marry him and Clark moves into a mansion that has more ghosts than it has people.

So I couldn’t find more AUs for this list, I was about to quit looking and yesterday I ran into this one and it gave me so much hope that there might be more out there (part 3?maybe?) I think of this as Ghost Whisperer Clark 

Stories for the Loved and Lost by MatchaMochi @renaimori 

M - 9,681

The first chapter leads Clark to another, and another. He turns the pages, eating the words up hungrily and feeling them, pored over the story as if he was reading someone’s personal diary. And the thing was, he knows it, he knows this story. He remembers flashes of memory that aren’t his, thrown in yesterday’s weird dream or last night’s nightmare.

or in which Bruce is an author and Clark is his fanboy.

I WILL read every single SOULMATE AU FIC I CAN FIND CAUSE I’D DIE FOR THIS TROPE. This is beautifully written <3 <3

Ghastly Murders in the East End by dippkip @dippkip

T - 38,227

London, 1888. A vicious killer known as Jack the Ripper has begun haunting the district of Whitechapel. In light of Scotland Yard’s inability to solve the case, intrepid reporter Clark Kent has made it his mission to track down this fiend and bring them to justice, though he may find himself more deeply involved in the affair than he bargained for.

Meanwhile, Bruce Wayne, a seemingly irresponsible and eccentric duke, remains largely unconcerned about these atrocities. The Batman, however, has taken special interest, and spends his nights relentlessly hunting the new murderer at large. The paths of these men will converge as the body count begins to rise, and their investigations and growing affections will cement their bond, intertwining their fates with that of the most notorious murderer in all of England.

OKaaaay this is one of the exceptions, Bruce is Batman but it’s a different century and Clark is powerless, I think it compensates. Usually I prefer when they’re both “capeless” but this was such a fun read. 

As You Grow by dnawhite76 & Prubbs @prubbs​ 

M - 59,946

After the death of his wife and children, Clark returns to the United States after spending years abroad to reconnect with his friends and their families. And while trying to gather what little remains of his old life and possibly move forward in his grief, he ends up falling into old habits with his first love and best friend, Bruce Wayne.

A story about grief and acceptance.

So I want to point out how good this fic is. I hate sad and this story has a lot of grief and I felt it was very grounded on its depictions of feelings. I tend to avoid this type of fics buuuuut this was so good. I couldn’t stop reading even if the grief got to me. It’s very wholesome and does have a satisfying ending. 

A good start by BlueAlmond @discretocincel​

G - 1,253  

Clark loves being an elementary school teacher, but it breaks his heart to see any of his students hurting. So, when he notices Jason waiting over forty minutes every day for someone to pick him up, he decides to have a word with his father.

Absolutely love Professor Trope!!! Sooo you could argue this is ficlet but doesn't feel like one to me so I’m not putting it in the ficlet section. 

Engraved In Our Souls by Nixie_DeAngel @nixie-deangel​

T - 9,004

It started with pain, with warm blood and bold, black letters. How was he to know it'd lead to a pair of gorgeous eyes, shimmering with the promise of life long happiness and love?

Or, after years of waiting, Bruce finds his soulmate in the least likely of places.

Little cute soulmate AU<3  AS I SAID I WILL READ EVERY SINGLE SOULMATE AU OUT THERE CAUSE I LOVE THEM

Ghosts by ren_makoto 

T -3,067

Wayne Manor is haunted. Clark doesn't mind.

Here is another of the exceptions, this is neither No Powers/No Capes, but they’re not relevant to the plot or we don’t see them using them (I don’t think they are mentioned but its implied). The Fic’s whole focus is on the ghosts! and absolutely loved it I LOVE REN MAKOTO FICS

There is Little Danger by ren_makoto

T - 5,327

"It's tradition," he said, one inch from Clark's mouth. "Yes," Clark said. "Tradition."

Or, where Bruce and Clark are trapped in an elevator

another Ren Makoto cause I can’t help myself

Semi-Permanent Couplings by ren_makoto

E - 10,463

"So, Bruce, how do you feel about one-night stands?"

Ren Makoto <3 <3 <3 This fic contains Adultery soo Read the Author’s Notes

Hubris by ren_makoto

M - 20,197

"This is turning into a routine," Bruce said breathlessly. "What can I do for you, Clark?" "Please," Clark said hoarsely. "I just want to get some sleep."

I really like the writing on this fic, this is a 100% NO CAPES, Clark does have powers and he’s starting to process them. Ren Makoto stole my heart with this one.

Not so Perfect Afterall by tekowrites

E - 6,966

AU: High school, Senior year. Clark thinks his life is nearly, if not already perfect. Then he overhears a conversation that changes absolutely everything. Bruce is there to pick up the pieces.

Red, White and Blue by melmel_79

E - 3,639

He works for the Secret Service, and it's best that no one knows he is in a relationship with the president. At least he hoped no one would know...

He grips the envelope tighter and knocks on the door to the Oval Office.

This was a mistake.

Late Night Feelings by the_butler @the-butler-fanstuff

M - 9,283

It was a little past one in the morning, the phone the only light in his room. He glared at it, then threw it to his side on the bed, not caring to see where it landed. A few seconds after, he patted all along the side to find it and looked at it again. He pulled up the messaging app, scrolled down, and then sighed. He exited the app and threw the phone on the bed again. He repeated this several times until some minutes later the phone chimed and he hurriedly sat up and felt for it on his bed. He opened the messaging app again and finally breathed a sigh of relief when he read the reply he’d been waiting for the whole night.

“Be there in 30 mins.”

I LOVE CLARK HERE, GOOD FOR YOU. He’s such a good adult looking out for himself! self-loving and self-respecting Clark here everybody.

it took me by surprise (I know you felt it, too) by jessequicksters @jessequicksters​

G - 1,124​

In which Clark and Bruce fall in love in between study sessions, track races, grocery shopping at Whole Foods and romantic student dinner dates, burnt lasagna and all.  

FLUFF, could argue this is a ficlet buuuuut dont care, it goes here.

Towards You by tekowrites

E - 22,607

AU where Clark is a new transfer student at an elite high school, and he encounters Bruce Wayne. Clark doesn't fit in, not anywhere it seems, and his crush on the star of the football team? Only serves to shows how much. Jealous girlfriends, misunderstandings, hormones and lurking trouble are just some of the challenges he's going to face.

I LOVE THIS , basically this fic made want to make a PART 2, just had to find 15+ other fics to add to the list. 

Read the tags, this does contain some heavy topics towards the end

The Game (of Love) by KaizokuHime @kaizokunohime

E -12,288

In WayneTech VR Augmented Gaming, a guild of superheroes has arisen who volunteer to help police that reality. One of these superheroes, Superman, has had a crush on his fellow member, Batman, for many years, but thus far has had little success on asking him out, even as fellow guildmembers. How will their relationship progress? And how intimate can they truly become without knowing the other's identity offline?

A Game You Can't Win gave me hunger for gaming fics, then I found this one and I WANT MORE GAMING FICS

Wham Bam Shang-A-Lang by ShowMeAHero @andillwriteyouatragedy

E - 8,354

Clark Kent is a professor at the same university as Bruce Wayne. Not that it matters, because Bruce doesn't really speak with his co-workers - they're there to work with, not befriend. That is, until Clark and Bruce are assigned to teach a class together in the fall, and start spending more and more time together, and Bruce starts to realize, maybe, he just might need a friend - and maybe, he just might need something else, something Clark-specific.

YES YES PROFESSOR TROPE. They are the best together!

------------------------------------------------------------------

SORTA KINDA MAYBE FITS THE CATEGORY

The Gift by tmelange

E - 5,564

University student Clark Kent is on a field trip to Gotham City where he meets a creature of the night.

VAMPIRE AU, soooo Clark has powers but he is not superman so NO CAPES on his part. Bruce is a Vampire and I’m not really sure if he’s Batman but he’s some sort of vigilante. This felt very AU and sorta? fit the category, so I decided to add it anyways but it’s worth to mention this is an outlier on this list.

------------------------------------------------------------------

SPECIAL MENTION CAUSE I HAVENT READ THIS ONE BUT IT WAS RECOMMEND TO ME by @just-add-butter​

Spoils of War by littlechinesedoll @cumdumpsterbrucie

“If I go with you as a spoil of this pointless war, will you leave?” Bruce stands his ground, terrified and shaking, but he keeps eye contact with the warlord.

“Excuse me?” Kal must be hearing things.

“If I go with you, if I serve you, will you let my people live? Will you let my brother live?”

This is not finished buuuut it’s a Medieval AU. I just need to get myself in the right mindset to read an unfinished fic but will get to it! love what llittlechinesedoll writes.

------------------------------------------------------------------

FICLETS 

This section was accidental. I like my fics long and rarely read ficlets but here are a few that came across my way when I forgot to set word count filters.

Snapping the Chats by littlechinesedoll @cumdumpsterbrucie

G - 2,278

Clark tries to use the Snapchat filters on Bruce.

General Check-up by littlechinesedoll @cumdumpsterbrucie

T - 906

One where Brucie is getting a check-up from Thomas Elliot and he touches Bruce more cause Clark is obviously jealous

Subway Providence by the butler @the-butler-fanstuff

G - 400

A short drabble about art I did of Clark and Bruce waiting for the train on a subway platform.

So my first list was me coming across and realizing I love this kind of AUs and this second list is me carefully looking for them! Even tho my 1st list has some of my favorites, I hold this one closer to my heart. Hope you Enjoy it. 

Also if you know of any that I haven’t included on these lists, please I beg you send them my way <3 

[spookypotato]

Wow I loved that ankle fic!! If you are still looking for fics I would really enjoy one where Sirius is caught skating before he’s been cleared, maybe with a couple of the other boys and he gets in loads of trouble, lol dw just ignore if it’s bad idea 😄

1. Thank you! I'm happy you liked it.

2. Oooh yess! I hope I can do this idea justice, because I like it a lot. That's such a Sirius thing!

3. Also I love requests. I have quite a hard time coming up with good ideas but I love to write, so thank you!

Characters by @lumosinlove 💙 Thank you for this universe!

Sirius has been on the ice once, since the 'accident'. It went about as good as watching a toddler take his first steps, but in the end he was able to skate slow laps without falling down. It was stupid. He did this for a living. He had been - not to brag, just stats - one of the best. And now he was sitting on the bench waiting for the team to clear out, so he could go through the pain of skating in a circle for half an hour.

After their practice was over, Sirius went back, to the lockerroom with the boys. He could at least help them theoretically. James asked, how he was doing, as he did each week sometime more than once. Sirius - as he did each week - answered with a: "too slow for my liking". James responsible-motherhen-instict was now, nowhere to be found, when he suggested going skating later that day once even the staff had cleared out.

"You want me to risk my recovery to skate properly now instead of in a few months? Are you crazy!?", is what Sirius should have said.

"So when and where are we meeting?", is what came out of his mouth in a whisper.

That's how after the 10 laps, he did with (almost) ease today, he told Loops, that he was going to stay and do some more streches.

"You can overdo it, you know?", Remus told him, "just be careful alright? I know you'd be devastated, if all of your progress was ruined. And I would be the one having to listen to you whine."

"Firstly, I dont whine. Ever." -thats a lie and both of them knew it- "and secondly, thank you so much for your concern about my well-being, but I'll be careful, mum", Sirius added theatrically annoyed.

"This is literally my job. To tell you to be careful, so that you can play next season."

"So you dont really care about my well-being then, Loops?", Sirius gasped dramatically.

"Dont overdo it. See you tomorrow, Cap."

"Bye, Re."

The rink was silent. It was just him.

Then he nearly fell over as James jumped on him from behind.

Correction, it was just him and James.

"So, you're feeling up to playing?", James asked, standing on his own now.

"Do you really think you can win a one on one against your Captain, Potty?", Sirius challenged.

"Yes. But also I was thinking we wait for the others to join first. They should be here in a second."

"You told the others? If anybody finds out we'll be in so much trouble.", Sirius was beginning to regret his decision.

"So you dont want to play with us?", Finn's voice came out of the tunnel.

"Betrayed by our own captain?!", Logan's voice followed.

The cubs and Kasey stood in front of them now.

"Did nobody of you think it was a bad idea to come?!", Sirius asked.

"Well, our captain thinks it's fine, apparently." "And we found out about it a minute ago that someone will be blocking the rink during goalie-practise times", Leo completed Finn's thoughts.

"So we thought we'd stay with Nut and see if you suck now.", Logan added.

And because Sirius was already excited to just play a little, he answered an "Oh, it's on, Tremzy!" from where he was lacing his skates a bit tighter to give his ankle at least some stability.

Kasey hadn't been much for the idea of his Captain playing again. He knew from his thighs, that disregarding Loops orders, would only lead to a longer break. But since he would have been at the rink because of his goalie-practise anyway, he decided he would stay. Just to keep an eye on them, of course.

Definitely not, because he was missing his captain as much as the rest of the team on the ice.

Once they were all on the ice, James let Sirius choose his Teammates in a three on three. It ended in Potts, Logan and Leo against him, Finn and Kasey.

They all got their sticks and let Sirius' team have the puck first. And so his first after-recovery-game began.

He knew they went easy on him and for the first time he was glad about that. It made the game easier. He got less competitive than usual and thus put less pressure on his recovered ankle.

They passed the puck easily between one another. It felt like he had never been gone. Skating had been so had the first time afterwards, but as soon as he held his stick, he felt like this was were he always belonged.

Sirius got it to Finn and he shot it back. Kasey acting as a player now skated through the middle. He got the puck from Sirius and went for the goal. It hadnt been a bad shot at all, but for Leo there was no fun in letting the puck go in on purpose, so he blocked it and shot it to Logan.

The game went back and forth a few times, Sirius always staying on his good side. He even scored twice. He felt good. It was the first time in a long the he felt truly happy, even.

"Sirius!", came a shout from the boards. It was Lupin. A Angry-Faced Lupin. A kind of Lupin he hadnt seen in a long time. So Sirius decided to better skate over quick but carefully. The others luckily got the hint to be quiet. Or the just wanted to eavesdrop who knows.

"Sirius.", Remus repeated. "I told you to not overdo it-twice, might I add- and you decided playing a game with the team would be a good idea? I'm checking you again and yes, that is absolutely necessary. What were you thinking? You could have undone all you worked for so hard. Not just the last few months but your entire life. You could have never been able to play, do you know that?"

"Yes", Remus was never usually this angry. But Sirius thought he also saw something else in his eyes. Something between relief and excitement, he guessed.

"I hope I scared you enough with that whole speech, for you to not do it again unless I tell you you can, okay?", Loops actually waited for an answer this time. He seemed a bit more relaxed now.

"Ouai, pardon"

"No need to say sorry to me, it would have been your- Well, I do have more work now- actually yeah, say sorry, but it's no problem. I'm honestly just really glad your not currently on the ice with another broken bone.", Remus told him warmly. "Still, dont tell Arthur any of this. All of you!", he shouted to the rest still standing there. " And I will look at your ankle again, if something happens it's better to know sooner than later. Will you wait in the in the medic room?"

"Thanks. Yeah, I'll just take off the skates first.", Sirius answered, while making his way dont to the locker rooms. It was- if he hadnt broken anything again, which it didnt feel like- totally worth it. For the first time in months he actually felt like all the work had made a difference.

"Potts", he heard Loops again, while walking through the tunnel, "Potter, I know this was your idea. Come here and explain yourself."

[anakinthetrashking]

BnHA One-Shot Fic Recs (pt1)

Making some fic-rec posts has been on my to-do list for a while and I’m finally doing it, yay! Currently I have 6 word doc pages full of just BnHA recs. So I’m splitting them up by length and completion, so first up is (part one of) one-shots! Let’s go!!!

Lets start with some classic Izuku and DadMight!

Pictures, Posters and Tender Beauty by ProPinkist (tumblr: @dazais-guardian-angel ) Rating: G    Category: Gen   ~4,400 words Summary: Izuku has virtually every All Might-themed item out there, and prides himself on all of it, as Toshinori is well aware. However, somehow, the boy still decided that there was something vital missing. This is fluffy and very cute. No one truly appreciates All Might as much as Izuku does, but 1A comes close. All Might deserves all the love, and this fic truly provides!!!

Dear Mr. All Might by QuizzicalCrow (tumblr: @quizzicalcrow​ ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~5,000 words Summary: As the #1 hero for decades, All Might has collected a lot of fan mail over the years. Toshinori tracks down a series of letters that only now, years later, does he appreciate for their significance.  I always love the thought of All Might looking through his fan mail, even if he can’t get to all of it. This was a wonderful glimpse into that AND it was made to be so, so personal and sweet. Go have some heart-healing fluff.

Growing Pains by LordofLies (tumblr: @theangelofchildren ) Rating: G   Category: Gen    ~5,900 words Summary: Izuku finds himself changed by his encounter with the Hero Killer, but changes of a more physical kind are in store for him as he begins to truly accept One for All as his own. Once, he would have been thrilled to look more like All Might, but now those connections are as much a source of anxiety as they are of pride.Or, Izuku wakes up one morning and sees the world through different eyes. Izuku having anxiety and Toshi being there to help him through it and calm him down? Sign me UP. Its also a pretty cool take on how One for All is able to change things about it’s holder. Could this happen in cannon? Who knows.... Regardless, it was a great read!

I’ll Carry You Home by Renesvetta Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~2,700 words Summary: While training with All Might, it wasn’t uncommon for Izuku to be so exhausted at the end of the day that he unwittingly fell asleep without regard for where he was. It consequently became part of All Might’s routine to help his young protégé home. During that time, Izuku may have let loose more than one sleepy confession towards his mentor.  Yes, it is as adorable as it sounds. Its tagged with “self indulgent Dad Might fluff” which is both accurate and appreciated. In other words: Superb you funky little writer!

Simple Gifts by QuizzicalCrow Rating: G    Category: Gen   ~6,700 words Summary: One year ago, Izuku received the greatest gift he could ever imagine. Now he’s determined to return the favor for the one responsible for it all with a gift of his own.  First off, I love the idea of Izuku and Toshi quietly celebrating the anniversary of passing on OfA from All Might to Izuku. Even just taking the day to hang out with each other. It’s a really precious idea. But there’s not just fluff! Izuku finds himself in a fight, again. (cool villain quirk, too!) I love all of the small details that are in this fic (and in Crow’s other works, too!) anyway its exciting AND very heartwarming, so go read it!!!

Affectionate by Sevi007 (tumblr: @sevi007 ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~2,600 words Summary: Toshinori starts to show affection very easily around his students. The  reactions he gets for that are not quite the ones he had anticipated - well, not all of them, at least.  Toshi is LOVED, APPRECIATED, and 1A feels like HOME. how many times can i say “cute” and “heartwarming” on this post?? bc these are some amazing writers, whom I adore, and their writing makes my heart WARM. AND. FUZZY. i mean, even just the first few paragraphs of this one just, really sets the scene of what i like to believe the 1A dorm is (on a good day, lol). its a really nice read, so go treat yo’ self by reading it.

paint me in trust by dinomight Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~6,400 words Summary: The first mark Izuku gets is a slight brush of green across his temple. It’s the soft touch of a mother holding her son for the first time. Inko has one to match, the same shade of green staining the tips of her fingers. Hers is more noticeable; Izuku’s tends to blend into his hairline. He loves it anyways. He has to. It’s the only soulmate mark he has. (Or: how Izuku goes from just green to a rainbow, UA-style.)  Ok, so this fic sort of plays off the idea of soulmates, and does not fit in with soulmates in the usual form of the trope. First off its completely platonic. Its categorized as Gen and sticks to that. Also it doesn’t seem to be as obligatory and permanent as you would think it would be. It seems to be more of the universe telling you who has the possibility of being important in your life. I really really loved this, it was so adorable and gives you that sweet, sweet Izuku angst, before healing your heart with the power of friendship and found family!!!

The Die Has Been Cast by ChiwiTheKiwi (tumblr: @chiwithekiwi​ ) Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~5,400 words Summary: “There’s something about that kid you aren’t telling me, isn’t there?”When no answer meets him, Shouta tries again.“You know something about Midoriya’s quirk that you haven’t shared with me. Is that right?”(Or: A canon "What If" surrounding the latest manga events and focusing on Aizawa finally making a connection.) First off, this fic has spoilers for the manga, so dont read unless you’re past chp212! I loooooooove OfA reveal fics, especially when it’s Aizawa that finds out. He deserves to know!!! its kind of important!!!! This fic chooses a great moment to work off of, and does a great job with Aizawa’s character. I really enjoyed it and couldn’t keep myself from going back and reading it just now LOL

These last two are actually two-shots, but it makes it an even 10! also Izuku and dadmight, so we can continue the theme here...

Some Unspoken Thing by LittleKy Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~7,900 words (2chps) Green, Toshinori has always thought, is the color of life anew.(Or: It's time for Yagi Toshinori to finally accept that he has a son, now, in all but blood. It's time for Midoriya Hisashi to accept that as well.) YES ALL MIGHT! ADMIT THAT IZUKU IS YOUR SON! great portrayal of the characters and really hits the nail on the head for DadMight. and Izuku in this story is just the smallest green floof that you wish to give a hug. NEVER MIND ALL MIGHT, YOU TOOK TOO LONG SO IZUKU IS MY SON NOW AND IM NOT GIVING HIM BACK ( no but seriously i want to hug this fic its so cute TTuTT )

LAST BUT NOT LEAST! I See You by BirdAntlers (tumblr: @aarymk )

Rating: G   Category: Gen   ~15,400 words (2chps) Midoriya Izuku is a quirkless child, blind from birth. Yagi Toshinori is the most powerful man in the world, loved by millions. They could not be more different, and yet their loneliness is the same.   (From a pair of AU posts on Tumblr that got way out of hand; I wanted to put it here because it turned into more of a fic than a "what-if." Basically a vessel for me to vomit as much Dadmight as I can.) Hey, you! Yeah! You! Do you want to cry? Do you want to start sobbing in a public space?? Do you just want to be destroyed with words and be left there kneeling at the feet of a writer who has torn out your heart and stomped on it before they gently wipe the tears from your face? Yeah?? y oU Wan NA D IE??? READ THIS AND GET REKT.  you’ll thank me later

(under the cut is just me rambling, i kept all the important stuff up here, ur welcome)

Now that the actual recs are over I can rant here- look i really tried to slim my recs down, but i have almost 300 bnha fics bookmarked,some of them are “to read” or theyre in progress, etc but i managed to get this list sorta slimmed down? a little?(to only 58!!!) but as i was gathering this post together it felt like i dont have very many Dadmight recs on that list??? but i havent rechecked all the other fics i was just going through the oneshots. i... kinda read a lot more fics with AIzawa in it instead. it be that way. DadMight content is SO GOOD. but my fav is aizawa im sorryyyyy anyway i have another SEVENteeN oneshots to put in rec posts and that does NOT include the mulitchapter and friikin series and stuff... and like i said this is aaaaaaallllllllllllllll BnHA. batfam fic posts will come after, and then star wars, and then maybe star trek? we’ll see. i have a very specific taste in ST fics and that is Tarsus IV whump. which. i have not read in a while. when they say “that trope came from ST” for sooooooo many tropes, you WISH other fandoms had tarsus as a trope, holy crap it is TOP TIER angst fodder. if you love to write/read whump, angst, and h/c i would HIGHLY recommend that you take a bit of time and explore the content and stories there. heck maybe i will make a ficrec post for just tarsus angst. ok.

my INTENTION is to edit these posts later with little links to the other fic rec lists so that itll be easier to find. but., its me, so itll either happen in painful detail or not at all

asdjkdgh its 2:30am and i need to sleep and not be rambling incoherently again I WILL SAVE THIS AS A DRAFT. 

[gnarf]

Gnarf’s 2020

and what a fucking year that was... Anyways, let’s talk about the good things, shall we?

I made it through 2020 alive and without going insane! Yay! So lets see what else I did. (This is a long post)

In the beginning of 2020 I said I won’t participate in many fests. Only three or something like that. Lets check how that went!

Fests Gnarf participated in: 9

@lockdownfest @lcdrarry @hd-wireless @hpfluff-fest @hd-hurtfest @hd-fan-fair @hd-erised @gameofdrarry in drarropoly @wireless-festive-minifest​

Haha yup, three. Sounds legit. I also wandered off to try if I can art! No worries, I gave that up :D Mad respect to all Artists, arting is exhausting and the progress is too slow for me.

If you really want to check out my attempts, here’s what made its way onto AO3:

Dont Blink! for LCDrarry, it includes the Angels from Doctor Who and was a pain in the arse.

If you knew... was made for H/D Wireless and has the armiest arm i ever saw, very proud of that one. Its also the last thing I made.

Home Sweet Home was also made for H/D Wireless, and the first bigger art piece I tried my hand on.

A muffled groan which is rather explicit and I entirely forgot about making it :D it has a ficlet going with it too.

(I think theres other Art stuff here with the tag #gnarf draws or something)

I reached my yearly goal of writing 100k words once again!

Fics and Ficlets I wrote this year: 20(ish)

Better Side of the Bed (Lock Down Fest, T, 2k)

It was all Malfoy's fault. Harry could be at the Burrow right now, but instead he was trapped in Malfoy's tiny flat. All because that dick couldn't stop bothering him about a stupid life debt he didn't even care about.

Doing What's Best (G, ~800 words)

Lucius looked down at the little bundle currently sleeping in Narcissa's arms and felt terror shoot through his body. A little boy, his hair so white it was nearly invisible. Born only a few hours ago, taking his first breath in the light of the rising sun. Narcissa had whispered a welcome, her eyes wet, her smile bigger than ever. But they both knew, even though temporarily safe, he really wasn't. Draco was born into a world ruled by war. If only it'd end soon.

I better be hallucinating this (T, 3.8k)

After the war Draco Malfoy is sentenced to Azkaban for a really long sentence. Apparently aiding in Dumbledore's death overrules any argument Harry could put up for him. After the trial, as the days pass by, Harry is more and more outraged at the sentence. He can't stop obsessing over the fact that Draco Malfoy saved his life and aided him during the war and is very much capable of redemption. Not to mention that Malfoy has always been a delicate git and would never survive Azkaban. After a few weeks obsessing Harry decides that Malfoy indeed can't remain unjustly in Azkaban and starts to plot a way to break him out of jail and hide him in Grimmauld Place. When Hermione finds out she's not amused. Ron is horrified. Draco still thinks he's hallucinating.

Keep Holding On (Wireless, M. 33.333) A collab with @maesterchill​ who surprised me with lovely art for it!

After the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry and Draco both fall into their own battles with their mental states. Draco is sent to Azkaban, and Harry turns to drinking, hoping to forget. Months later, Harry visits St Mungo’s new ward on the request of a friend, only to find Draco in a deep vegetative state. Not willing to give him up, Harry stays by his side, while simultaneously dealing with the Ministry's newest grand idea to make everything worse. Making new allies, and losing old ones along the way, will hopefully be worth it in the end.

Age is just a number (Fluff Fest, T, 1.5k)

Married for decades, their life is perfect. Until Harry gets a call and hears the following words: "Mr Potter, we caught your husband stealing ten large packs of King Sized condoms."

There was still hope (Hurt Fest, M, 3.1k)

Draco winced as pain shot through his leg with every step. This secret, back-alley laboratory had been his last chance, last hope, to find the potion. But nobody had it in stock, and there was no time left to brew it himself. Panic was slowly overtaking his entire mind as he crept out of the store and back to the nearest alley to Apparate back home. He already felt off, and it was still early in the day. Of course this thestral-shit had to happen to him, of all people. As if life wasn't bad enough for him already.

Desire (E, 1.7k)

"Auror Potter, what a pleasant surprise to meet you here. What can I do for you?" "Stop the show, Malfoy. There's no one around, and I'm not here as an Auror." Draco watched Potter move closer until they were nearly nose to nose, only the small counter of his shop kept Potter at distance. Potter's eyes were dark with something Draco couldn't exactly name, his face was flushed and the air surrounding him felt somehow static. Draco felt the urge to lean further over his counter, to drink in his sight, to touch the man on the other side—but he didn't.

Drarropoly 2020 currently holds 7 ficlets and is in a Series. The highest rating is Mature and its 3.2k in total at this point.

Let's not wait for France (Fan Fair, T, 17.7k)

All Harry had wanted from his Eighth year at Hogwarts was a little peace and a little privacy but, from the moment that he stepped onto Platform 9 3/4, it was obvious that nothing was ever going to be that easy. An accidental bond with Malfoy that resulted in them having to stay together at all times was the final straw. Things couldn't be worse. So much to a quiet year in Hogwarts.

Love letters for the oblivious (Mini Wireless, T, 716 words)

Draco had gotten the strangest letters all week long, which wasn't what anyone needed at Christmas. Especially not him. Either someone was taking the piss, or he had a very dumb and inefficient secret admirer. And Draco didn't know which would be worse.

Double-Booked (Mini Wireless, T, 2.1k)

Finally, peace and quiet, and— "Malfoy?!?" Or the one where Harry thought he could enjoy a quiet Christmas far from everyone, just to find out that the cabin he had booked already accommodated another guest.

The best Christmas he ever had (Mini WirelessT, 1.9k)

Christmas had never been less appealing to him than this year. That was until Arthur Weasley showed up at his door, dressed as Santa, inviting him to the Burrow.

Anon Fests to be added

Whoever made it to this point: yoooo! Friend! Lots of love to you! I also got tagged in many get to know me posts, plenty of love in my Inbox giving me love slaps left and right (honestly, im bruised, stop slapping me), amazing person awards, top 5 fics, and whatever you can think of.

To make up for not answering most of them because I’m a horrible person:

My favourite colour: purple My age: I’ll be 30 next year in April, I expect gifts, I don’t accept first borns My favourite trope: eight year My favourite animal: cat My favourite ice cream: Ben and Jerry’s Cookie Dough Here’s my writing Playlist, it’s the worst you’ll ever see, and yes, I use YouTube, I’m old.

Other things that happened in 2020 that made me happy:

I kicked out my mentally/emotionally abusive partner of 7 years in January

I kept my grandma alive through this *waves hand at world*

I was able to share my birthday cake with my family becaus I got to leave my first quarantine a few days before my birthday

I got to keep my job

I found a lot of lovely friends in this fandom, and got to keep them through this year

My cats are their usual little jerks and actually enjoyed me being at home due to the raging pandemic

I finally cut off my hair

I’m about to hit 3.5k followers here and I love you all

I’m also tagging everyone who sees this and wants to do something similiar! Show us what you did in 2020, the things you’re proud of, and the things you loved! Let’s spread some happy for the end of the year 💜🥰

[arthurflecksgirl]

Hi sweety❤️ Can I have a fic where Arthur helps x reader who's having a panick attack? him calming her down, cuddling her... thank you so much 😘

My dear friend. Thank you sooooo much for your request. I really really hope you like the result.

Summary: You`re greateful for how far you and Arthur had come in your relationship, how much progress he made to experience true happiness. But then you discover one of his journal entries. Is he still in the same dark place he was before? Just the thought of him suffering is giving you a panic attack. But Arthur is right there with you...

The dim light from the tv screen was the only light that filled the living room. Murray Franklin was talking to a well known comedian. You watched Arthur resting on the couch. He was falling asleep during the live show, even though he was looking forward to this episode all day, he was so tired, his eyes got heavy when Ellis Draine and his Jazz Orchestra started playing already.

"One day" you thought watching him breathe in and out like it was the easierest thing to do when you suffered from waht he had been through. One day he will be sitting on Murrays couch and telling his own jokes. And his idol will be proud of him like a father. Because he deserved it. He deserved the world.

Arthur seemed at peace with himself sleeping. That was new. Which made you proud of how far you two have come in your relationship. He was getting better.You felt it every morning waking up, receiving your good morning kiss from his coffee stained lips and cigarette tasting breath. He was making baby steps but looking at it now, over a year later it was a total different world he was living in. The one you created together. Ever since you met him you wanted to cure him. To support and comfort him through everyday life. To help him out of his mindset which was all that he had known since he was little.

People kept telling you that it was impossible to heal wounds like his. To heal someone that experienced his kind of trauma. That all he needed was proffessional help. But you knew that they missed out at something. Just because he needed his meds didnt mean that love wasnt the key for his cure.  You knew that there were some scars hidden inside of him, buried so deep that it would take years to get through and be able to work on that. But you also knew that being  loved was the only thing in this world that could ease Arthurs pain and make him the man he always wanted to be. He was destined to be.

And every single day  spent together was proof that he was making progress. His smile became more and more genuine. His laughing fits didnt happen as often anymore and if so they wouldnt last that long because you would hold him and help him breathe until it was over. He also told you about his journal entries and how they changed. His therapist was also seeing the changes. He was talking about how much more poetry and beautiful thoughts filled the pages.

You gently stroke his hair. Watching him sleep always felt pretty intimate to you. He was so vulnerable and unaware of his beauty. But you knew that even in his sleep he was aware of another thing- your love. Thats why he was even able to get some sleep.

You took another close look at his face. You could never get enough of him. It was risky to give him a kiss on his closed eyelids. Arthur had a very light sleep and could wake up any second but there was no way to fight the urge to do so. His eyelid fluttered under the soft touch of your bottom lip, but he didnt wake. You let your index finger travel over his dark eyebrows. They were shaped so perfectly, matching his piercing eyes and the slight circles underneath them. His body was still stressed out from work. His fragile body which was trying so hard not to break down while starving.

His stomach problems caused by his meds was another thing you had to work through. You looked at the bowl on the table. he almost finished his soup today, which was a good sign. You smiled, got up from your knees and walked to his desk to get the empty cups of coffee from the morning. It was time to make the dishes.

But the moment you grabbed the cups his journal distracted you. It was opened. You wondered about his last entries, the ones he wanted to show you because he wrote some new poems lately.

It took you a moment to think about if it was even okay to have a look at the opened page but it was already too late. One sententence was marked, the letters thicker than the rest of the written words. It caught your eye without a warning. And when you read it, your heart stopped for a second.

"I just hope my death makes more cents than my life"

Why?

Why the hell would he write something cruel like that?

The letters started to blurr through your tears. One tear was falling upon the page. Right on the word HOPE.

Shit. Now he would notice that you came near this page. You nerveausly grabbed a handkerchief and pressed it on the spot where the tear was soaking through the page. It was too late, making it look even worse.

You started to cry , throwing the handkerchief on the floor.

Why?

Yo thought he was getting better. There was so much proof.

Did he felt like his life was worthless?

Didnt make any sense?

Was he feeling like all of this wasnt making sense?

You thought you helped him.

Was it al in your mind? His proress? Him becoming a happier version of himself? Was it all a lie you told yourself?

The possibility of Arthurstill being the same tortured soul as when you met him simply broke your heart.

Why was a beautiful and gentle soul like him suffering so much? How cruel can the world be to him?

Was he still wishing he was dead? Was he still lying in bed at night, fantasizing about ending his own life?  Would he ever hurt himself again? Risking to being locked up at Arkham, so there was no chance to share a bed together? Just visits with him being handcuffed on the other side of the table? Was there still a chance he was that unhappy inside?

Tears fell like rain.

The pain inside your heart grew with every thought that crossed your mind. If life was still torture to him, why wouldnt he talk about this to you? Didnt he trusted you enough? Was he embarrassed about how he felt? Or was it simply because he didnt wanted you to get worried about his condition?

It was all too much.

You started to feel like your throath was getting tighter. Like the walls were closing in. Everything inside of you screamed. There was this nameless fear inside of your guts. Possesing you, hurting you. It was getting harder and harder to breathe.

Dizzyness overcame you with all its power. Cold sweat. All of the sudden the happiness you felt while watching him sleep was being sucked out of your body. And now all you knew was fear.  Liek it was the only emotion left in the world. Pure, naked fear in its rawest form.

A panic attack.

You had experienced this before but never this intense.

You sat down on the chair, trying not to look at the opened journal again.  It hurt so much. All of it did. Your body. Your heart. Mostly your heart. And your head. Both heavy from tears and the thought of Arthur being suicidal.

Your breathing got heavier as you started to sobb.

And then you heard Arthurs footsteps. His naked feet on the floor. You woke him up. He was finally resting and you woke him. This made you feel even worse.

"Oh my god Y/N, darling. What happened?" He noticed your tears and heavy breathing.

"Dont worry....Arhur....please....just go back to sleep okay? You need your sleep.  You`ve been working hard today...."

Arthur checked your pulse "Oh shit, your heart is racing. Did you took any medication? "

"No..."

"Did something else happen?" He checked your forehead, noticed your shaking hands. "Looks like you`re having a panic attack. I know the symptoms very well. I had so many in the past when I woke up from nightmares."

You nodded. Still sobbing like a baby. Arthur gave you one of his handkerchiefes and started to stroke your hair "Oh darling, I kow this feels terrible. But it will pass. Just try to breathe. Breathe with me okay. Remember when you helped me breathe during my laughing fits? I will do the same with you now okay?"

"Okay"

Arthur lifted you up and carried you to the couch.

"Is that okay? Is it comfortable?" you nodded. He was so caring it broke your heart. He cared so much about you, while inside he was suffering from so much pain.

He positioned himself behind you, resting both of his hands on your tummy and told you to breathe in and out like he did. Until you felt your breath becoming one with his. Just as calm and deep.

"Good" he whispered, his gentle fingers under your shirt. He knew that skin on skin contact helped calming you down.

"You`re doing great" his voice was everything you needed to hear.

"Oh Arthur....I feel like I cant breathe...."

"Shhhhhhtt.....baby I know. I know how it feels. Your body is telling you lies. You can breathe. Just do it with me."

"You felt Arthurs chest lifting up and down, his warm breath in your neck. He was everything to you. You needed him to be happy.

Arthur placed thoughtful kisses all over your neck. As soft as a butterflies wings. You tried to concentrate on the details. His long , dark eyelashes crossing the spot behind your ears. The tip of his nose tickeling you. His muffled "I love you`s".

"I`m sorry I woke you up"

"Dont be!"

"There was this sudden fear coming over me. It was like....I thought I was dying."

"I´m right here with you Y/N. Nothing bad is going to happen to you, I promise!"

You nodded. Knowing he was right. Nothing could harm you with Arthurs arms around you. You just wished it was the same the other way around. Wasnt it the same?

His journal said it wasnt.  His written words hitting you like a knife.

"Do you know what triggered this?" He asked you, while his hand was caressing your chest.

Should you tell him? He would notice the wet spot on his journal page anyway.

"Arthur I am so scared to tell you this but...I was ...oh god....I was looking at your opened diary  page. It was lying on teh table when I was getting the coffee cups and there was this sentence that caught my eyes......" you started to sobb uncontrolable.

"What page?" he asked "Please dont cry. Ohhhhhh please ...." he pulled you closer to his chest so his heartbeat was pressed against you.

"You wrote....."I just hope my death makes more cents than my life...." Arthur. This hit me so hard. I didnt knew you still felt like this. I dont know.....what to say....I`m just.......oh Arthur....." you pressed yourself against him as if your life depended on it. Arthurs white shirt was now soaked with tears.

"Ohhh nooo darling. That was my old journal. My therapist wanted to bring it back to her to proof how much progress I made since I met you!"

You loosened your embrace to look him in the eyes "W-What?"

"Yeah" he shrugged "I just marked the darkest pages to see how far we have come and stopped at this one before going to sleep."

The weight of the world was falling off your shoulders "Really?"

"Yes.....oh  Y/N I am so sorry you had to go through these emotions just because I was so stupid to leave my old journal lying on the table. "

"You are not stupid Arthur!"

"Well this time I was"

"It was my fault....I shouldnt have looked at the page in the first place".

The air was finally coming back. Your body was starting to relax again.

Arthur held you close in his arms "That was the old me. And yes sometimes I´m still having dark thoughts but its just.....echoes from the past. Its not part of our reality anymore. Its just ghosts. They`re not real. Just trying to tell me lies. So I am not listening to them . I´m listening to you. To your words of love and comfort. I`m save with you. And you are save with me. Remember?"

"I remember Arthur. I love you so much!"

"I love you more"

"Thats impossible" you smiled, kissing his upper lip.

Arthur rested his head in the crook of your neck whispering "If I`ve learned one thing from being loved, its this: Nothing`s impossible - with you in my arms".

@impulsiveclown @will-you-be-there @jokerownsmysoul @missjoker96 @arthurskitten @lynnesm @nonnymousse @gwynplaine89 @ajokeformur-ray@damnrightobsessedwithim @sgtsavoytruffle  @duhliriouss  @flowerglitterwoman @thirstforfleck @spookyhome @iartsometimes  @you-cant-cry-in-here @bustafatclownnut @jokerismyhubbie  @check-out-this-joker @darknessisafriend  @arthurhappyclown    @neon-umbrella-for-stella    @call-me-harley-quinn  @arthurjokersgirl

@aarthurfleckk @mylovelycrazyworld @clownalog @ajokerfangirl  @the-one-who-is-chaos @sabrinaeileensnape @raven-romanoff

[princeanxious]

A random logicality fic i didnt realize I wanted to write until just now, that i can't write out into an organized fic story atm but I can ramble about its whole world and character settup! So like. Take this as a massive bullet point fic if you will, but, yknow, minus the bullet point part..

[[MORE]]

Some background info: this is an omegaverse idea BUT it primarily focuses on the worldbuilding, character dynamics, and relationship dynamics and doesnt focus or even really mention nsft stuff. At least not in this post! Another fact abt this au is that there are no betas in this au, just alphas and omegas representing as the primary biological differences. Same general biology applies, and there is this worlds own version of the LGBTQ+ community as well, ect ect.

Logan is a highclass omega that lives on a large estate and is the only omega, let alone male omega(which is uncommon in this au), in his well known family's current generation. Hes got two other older alpha siblings Thomas and Deceit(named Dorian in this fic) and theyre all p close to eachother and wellknown to the public for being anti-classist despite the rest of their highclass family's history of being generally snooty and classist and not very family-oriented. They probably run a big entertainment company named after the family line and thats where most of their wealth comes from. Their family surname is probably Sanders. Logan is like, an inch above normal height for an omega and is sort of a frail, lanky, and uber pale man who doesn't eat well and doesnt exercise often and doesnt get enough sunlight and is often bored out of his mind, frankly.(all of this is due to his parent's terrible job of raising him, both from the servants (unhappily)following their orders for his care and from their blatant disregard for his health and happiness as a male omega. His brothers and the servants do the best they can to sneak around the rules, at least for food and sneaking Logan books and candles to entertain himself late at night or in his freetime when they arent hanging out together)

Patton, on the other hand, is a mid-high class Alpha in a little less well-known(in comparison to the Sanders family at least) but still well-respected family in a slightly smaller estate, known from their history of being a long line of hardworking successful people and being a very big and far reaching family. They probably breed a few prized mostly pure-bred and cross-bred horse breeds (the ethical way of course). And perhaps they(at least at Patton's estate specifically) also have their own fruit tree plantation that is known for selling its fruit as well as making said fruit into jams to be sold locally. Theyre family also has ties in helping many local businesses as well as a few larger companies ect. ect. The main family branch name is Crofters. ;p Patton is a v tall boi, and like his father, works hard around the estate just as much as any other worker. He helps harvest fruit from the plantation when its time and gets to help turn a good portion of the fruit into their famous crofters jam, and he helps tend to the stables and horses and chores all around the estate, does lots of heavy lifting ect.ect. So. Tall buff boi who's v suntanned and v freckled and made of friendliness and sunshine smiles yknow?? Hes an only child with just a father by the time hes 21 and a ton of extended family but he makes an effort to check in and make sure the local youth and elderly are well taken care of.

So in this fic, like, these things that are sort of like coming-of-age courting parties/festivals are held? It's a big cultural thing that happens each season to allow un-courted young adults a chance to meet and socialize with other un-courted young adults at their own leisure and pace rather than being subjected to family-directed arranged courtings(which are mostly a thing of the past at this point for their culture)

So like, p much Thomas and Dorian have to step in to help Logan persuade their parents into letting them take Logan to a local coming-of-age festival bc his parents are like this close to just making Logan go through w/ an arranged courting from some other highclass alpha, bc omega males aren't as 'prized'(to the highclass) or seen as desirable as omega females so getting Logan to marry into another wealthy family solely for maintaining status and making wealthy ties is the only use they see for him. Which of course,, his alpha siblings are having none of that if they have anything to say about it.(and they do. Logan deserves as much freedom as they do if not more, especially at this point in their lives. And Dorian spends the whole walk back to their bedrooms venting about the stupidity and blatant sexism of the fact that Dorian and Thomas are freely allowed to go wherever and do whatever they please because they're Alphas, "but Logan can't and has to be escorted everywhere that he is allowed to go if he wants to go anywhere as if he doesnt have his own autonomy! Why can Thomas and I go to the festival's without any fuss or escort but Logan is almost two steps from forbidden to even chose his own attire for the day? Highclass society is bullshit!")

So, with the eventual hard-won mutual agreement that Thomas and Dorian will be Logan's direct and only escorts to the festival who will not be left alone(they wouldnt leave him alone anyway, though not out of thinking that Logan is a dependent helpless omega that needs to be attended to and directed at all times, bc they dont believe that like their parents do, its out of the fact that theyre not about to leave their two years younger baby brother who has virtually no experience in socializing, let alone making friends, alone in a loud activity-filled festival w/ a large amount of varied attendance.) They head off during the winter festival season(as Logan's 21st birthday was in late autumn) to at least introduce their own friends that they've met over the years to Logan(who many of them have heard about but never met previously due to their parents toxic outdated mindsets on how omegas needed to remain shielded from the world and obediant, so Logans only friends for the longest time were his brothers themselves and that was it.).

So, the cast fic placements sorta go like this: Dorian has his intentions set on courting this very chaotic very non-conforming omega male named Remus(bc really, both of them just wanna say fuck you to the Sanders' parents' outdated ideals of societal conformity, really. However, Dorian pursuing Remus is like 5% driven by saying suck it to society, 15% spite towards his parents, and 80% because Remus stole his heart the first time they met by being unabashedly himself and being super interested and forward towards Dorian without being patronizing or disgusted with his birth scars and blind eye. Remus without prompting settles up against Dorian's blindside at all times when in public to work as a barrier to others sneaking up on the visually impaired alpha, all unprompted. Remus really really likes Dorian, and the feeling is mutual.) And! it works out bc even tho Remus is about as wild and as independant and inobedient and non-fragile and as far from the rest of the perfect omega stereotypes as they get, he's part of a family that is even higher in status than the Sanders family. Remus and his twin Roman are both male omegas born into a wealthy and publicly generous family that honestly is probably the most well known in the entertainment industry for its long line of professional actors, singers, and popular film/stage play writer and producers. Remus and Roman are naturally charismatic, Roman being a talented singer and trained actor while Remus dabbles in script writing and producing. Their mothers are respectively an omega and alpha and have their own accomplishments. And, are infact very progressive, and they plan to hand off the company to Roman and Remus to run when the twins are ready to, marriage not required. So, like. The Sanders parents cant exactly find a reason not to let Dorian pursue Remus without being openly obvious in their conservative views about omegas. (Which The Twins' parents already know about through Remus's recountings of Dorian's venting abt Logan's childhood mistreatment) so, safe to say, everyones in on pissing off the Sanders family in ways that they can't openly be mad about.

Anyways, to tie this all back in, the festivals mentioned above are both for meeting mutually un-courted young adults/adults and also for individuals to pursue courting who they want to court without family/class bias ect. (So like, un-courted/non-courting individuals dress/wear a main article in a certain color, while courted/courting individuals wear any other colors but that color, and said color depends on what season its in, and this coloring isn't something that varries from town to town, its universal in their culture. For Spring, un-courted individuals wear Green, in fall its Orange, in Summer its Yellow, and in Winter its Blue. And thats how you differentiate) so Thomas and Dee return to attend each of the seasonal festivals to court who theyre pursuing as a special time alone from either family watching as well as it being another way of meeting up with their friendgroup to have fun.

So, through Dorian, Logan finally meets Roman and Remus, and honestly its a real struggle for them to get along at first bc Roman and Remus are loud and brash and opinionated and independent, and rather unfiltered. And. Well, Logan grew up being trained to be the opposite, so he doesnt think they're compatible friends. But thats how he’s been raised to think. They lead and smother him in their conversation for a hot minute before realizing Logans just politely listening and not even attempting to join in, looking mildly uncomfy and out of his depth. And Romans a little offended before he remembers that what Remus relayed to him about Logan's uprising. So, Remus finds a way to get under Logans skin just enough to break down the polite walls that have been trained into him. Remus states stating false facts to Logan that he knows Logan knows are false and is able to get Logan just incredulous and heated enough to debate back. And Roman joins in just in time to change the subjects just a bit, and it takes some time but they get into a grove of getting Logan used to talking without being talked to, giving his own opinion on things without fear of repercussion and just generally conversating.(and they find, very smugly, that Logan can be just as loud and passionate about facts and his own thoughts and opinions if given the right outlet and the push to do it.) And it finally gets Logan to loosen up just a bit, to relax and smile and laugh(!!), and his brothers are just as excited for him bc Logan's finally getting to break out of his shell without the oppressive control of their parents directly looming over him.

So, okay okay, I'm getting to the logicality part, shhh, perfection takes time!! So, okay, I forgot to squeeze this in earlier but Thomas is courting Remy, whos a talented and smart as fuck, independent male omega from a family from their neighboring country. Remy has a big fam, but hes the head in charge out of all his siblings, ect ect. He’s an omega and the oldest, with three younger alpha siblings and one younger omega sibling. His parents are headstrong people who’ve raised a take-no-shit omega who will not be pushed around and will gladly do his own thing, thank you. If we’re being honest, its really Remy courting Thomas, whos a big-hearted softy introverted Alpha, like they are mutually interested in one another but Remy is a massive extrovert and theres no misunderstanding whose taking charge when theyre together. Remy’s existance alone is enough to Piss off the Sanders Family parents, especially after Remus enters the picture, however.. Remy takes it to the next level by being the more incharge, natural born leader, therefor flipping the old dominant alpha and obedient omega sterotype on its head. Thomas is happy to piss them off in doing it bc letting Remy take the lead makes Remy happy and keeps Remy from getting ansy and makes him happy bc he was never going to fully fit the dominant alpha sterotype anyways. Further still, out of the three siblings that are part of the Sanders family, only Thomas keeps the Sanders surname name in the end, as Dorian plans to take Remus’s and (future)Logan plans to take Patton’s surname. Which sets them up for: Remy chosing to take the Sanders Surname therefore becoming a direct part of the Sanders family name lineage, which the parents have no say over bc its technically up to Thomas by law, who gives Remy the option to chose on his own, ect.

Okay okay, w/ that set up, lets move forward.

Its p much a one-by-one meeting basis as Logan meets Dorian and Thomas’s partners and friends. So, Roman, Remus, and Remy all p much take Logan under their collective wing as soon-to-be omega brother-in-laws do. They all realize they’ve got a lot to teach Logan, and more importantly, kinda really need to get him courting soon bc Logan really needs to get out of that toxic household. They’re planning to keep it slowish bc Logan doesn’t know quite yet how to talk to people that arent his brothers, let alone have any knowhow on consentual courting?? But yeah, they’re keeping an protective eye out alongside Dorian and Thomas while still letting approaching un-courted alphas and omegas come close enough to interact/flirt w/ Logan. About mid-day Roman’s courting partner finally arrives:

A slightly withdrawn, tall and quiet Alpha who looks fairly intimidating until Logan realizes just how anxious the lanky Alpha is and how Roman is definately leading when he needs to to keep Virgil from overthinking. They end up hitting it off very well, unsurprisingly. Virgil doesn’t really know Logan’s whole story like Remus does bc Roman didn’t know to tell him in time so it takes some catching up and trading of their home lives to get to speaking terms but, Logan is soon to be the Twin’s brother in-law soo.. that p much makes Logan his family to be anyhow, so. Safe to say Virgil plays a minor part in warding off all too-cocky alphas thinking theyre about to find an easy catch in approaching Logan. Though, realistically, its the fact that a small group of courting young-adults are guiding and staying w/ said un-courted young-adult that keeps Logan from getting approached too much. It may not have allowed him to get the full festival experience, but, its likely Logan would not have been able to handle the Full Experience, especially not on his own.

Finally, incomes Patton. Patton, wearing blue just like Logan, stands out because he approaches the group fearlessly and full of sunshine, going through and greeting each familiar face before he realizes Logan is a new part of the group and politely and warmly introduces himself. Though well known to the group through being Virgil’s longstanding childhood bestfriend and part of a very openly interactive and helpful w/ everyone around them family, this is actually Patton’s first coming-of-age festival, as he’d just turned 21 two weeks prior. And hes very excited to meet new people, he always is! He’s quick to tell Virgil that the jam they’d made earlier in the fall(it was tradition at this point that Virgil helped Patton with the jam making process every year) had been successful in sales and smiles, and hes content to ramble to Virgil about the progress of the stables’ new foals. Logan would have thought Patton had out-right forgotten about him had Patton not begun turning to ask Logan an excited question every minute or so. And he always listened to Logan’s answers completely with rapt attention before asking or saying something further.

Niether of them know they’d both had the same thought when they’d first seen the other. A very sappy, very flustered thought of ‘Oh god, he’s cute.’ The moment they’d made eye-contact.

And, well, Logan is a tad overwhelmed, for many reasons. For one, Patton, on the very surface, is very attractive. Tall and well-built, sunkissed and freckled with curly blond hair and a dashing smile that lit up his entire expression, and Logan couldn’t help mirror Patton’s infectious smile with a shy one of his own. Another was that Patton’s voice was warm, not too loud though it carried well, it was welcoming and unashamedly happy. Patton was patient and kind and friendly, yet still felt reminiscent of an excited puppy. He was unabashedly himself in the nicest of ways, and Logan’s heart kept fluttering everytime their eyes met, everytime Patton asks him a question or answers his own. Patton leads the conversation, but leaves plenty room for Logan to take his own direction if he pleases. He’s considerate and thoughtful and actually treating Logan like a person, not some dependent omega or a possible mate. And it definately doesn’t go unnoticed that Logan’s blushing and slightly flustered, but Patton doesn’t push about it, he just lets the conversation stop and go as they please as the group wanders around and take part in the festivities.

And.. well, the group does take notice that Patton and Logan have started ignoring outside signals of omegas and alphas that wanna get close and interact with either one of them, but they don’t tell them about it. Logan and Patton are pretty obviously interested in each other, and honestly no ones gonna interrupt them while they figure things out. Patton is the only one who definately doesn’t know about Logan’s situation, but he picks up on it’s cues pretty quickly and treads carefully without prodding, though Logan is upfront about himself being raised under opressive conservative ideals so hes pretty new to everything, but he leaves it at that for their first interaction.

P much they spend the rest of the festival together, Dorian and Thomas directly checking in once or twice to confirm Logan is doing okay and happy. Thomas is met with a soft “yes.. Is this what romantic attention feels like?” And Dorian gets “Yes, though i’m not sure how long i’m going to be able to keep functioning if he keeps smiling at me with his handsomeface.” Which these things are said obviously w/ Patton out of earshot And both brothers have to keep themselves from cackling bc their brother is very gay for Patton. And Patton is very openly gay for Logan right back, not that Logan really knows how to read that yet tho.

By the end of the festival, Logan just decides that he wants to pursue courting Patton, h’s very sure of it especially after bringing it up with Dorian and Thomas and getting their approval. Then Logan brings it up with Patton directly and it goes something like this:

Logan shyly but determained asks Patton if he would consider courting Logan, and Patton just smiles warmly and leans down to take Logan’s hand and kisses it. Then says “I did consider it, Lolo, and I’d be more than blessed to get to court you.” And Logan just blushes so bright he has to hide his face and Patton just laughs and hugs him.

Skipping forward, Patton gets the Sanders families hesitant approval to let him directly court Patton, which involves them sending Logan over to spend periods of time at Pattons estate, and Patton coming to stay with Logan at the Sanders estate during the other half of the time. Cue Patton learning just how bad Logan’s home situation is and would be without his brothers there to buffer some of it, and Patton stepping up to curb it back as well while being non-aggressive about it.

Cue Patton taking Logan to meet riding horses directly for the first time, as well as meet baby horses. He eases Logan into the concept of being free to do almost whatever he pleases while staying at the Crofters estate, which is pretty mild for the longest time but watching Logan smile excitedly when he got a new book, or got to walk around town with Patton, or got to say yes or no just because he finally could? It means all the world to Patton. Cue the scene of them resting under a tree near the front of the estate during the day, easily seen and watched but relaxing and napping atop of one another all the same. Logan’s head against Patton’s board chest, listening to Patton’s heartbeat while patton runs his hand through Logan’s hair. Then, Logan tenatively asking about laying out front to stargaze in the evening, and honestly the night they finally get to stargaze for the first time a few days later is when the really fully fall in love.

Cue Virgil coming to visit with Roman in tow when its that time of the year to make the famous Crofters jam, and Logan is staying over at the estate at the time. And Logan finally tries Crofters jam for the first time, as he’d been putting it off before as not being a jelly person. And he just. Finds he really really likes it, probably an inproper amount. Patton takes notice, and doesn’t hesitate to spoil Logan with it every once in a while. Logan also learns how to make Crofters jam, and it was alot of fun to do! Hes tuckered out by the end of it, but thats not surprising.

And okay. Another major fun plot point is that during times that Patton and Logan are staying at the sanders estate, Dorian and Remus, Thomas and Remy, and Roman and Virgil also often are found staying at the large estate, and its no coincidence. Now that Logan is being directly courted(and its going very well), Logan’s autonomy now falls under Patton’s command, not Logan’s parents. And, well, Patton lets him make his own decisions as long as they stick together, as Pattons not comfy leaving Logan alone unless hes with one of his brothers or their omegan mates(bc at this point, Remus and Dorian finished their yearlong courting and married and are official mates, and same goes for Thomas and Remy. ) and well. My favorite concept is that Logan now has the guidance of 3 firely independant omegas to help him learn to strive for the independant mindset that had been robbed from him in his youth. Safe to say, Logan comes out just as stubborn and independant and passionate as the other three. He just tends to be the one out of the four who is the most content with their alpha being a bit more in the lead on a daily basis.

Didn’t really think abt an ending too much but like, Logan and Patton get married and become mates and move to Patton’s estate permanantly and just being so happy and inlove with Patton. And everythings?? Good?? So yeah.

[thisuserlovesnayeon]

hello everyone! well i dont know who i mean by “everyone” considering my blog is basically an echo chamber for my own thoughts and feelings but nevertheless hello! as you may have seen already loads on your dash, everyone’s whipping out the end of year shoutout posts thanking the people who have made this dark hellhole seem a bit brighter. im going to do the same - so to all the people tagged below thank you very much for your services to my mental wellbeing!! as an avid fanfic consumer i will say the amount i interact with said fanfic writers is quite atrocious - something I hope to improve in the new year. so without further ado, here are some people id like to say thanks and well done to!

🌟 @starrychannies - thank you for being the first skz blog i decided to follow since stanning!! your fics are so beautifully written and you just have this way of writing that fills me with what i can only describe as warmth and love. the little details you put in and how you write the characters (both skz and the reader) is what keeps me coming for more. its like i feel a genuine connection with the characters that rarely occurs in fics it seems and im very grateful for your talent - along with the memey gifsets and picures of course! i genuinely hope 2021 is a gorgeous year for you!

🌷 @akinnie75 - where on earth do i even begin!!! i remember stumbling across your blog on a sunny june afternoon and suddenly it was time for dinner, id read all of your fics multiple times and i could barely remember that the BTS members werent really princes or ghosts or even sociology majors! the way your stories cascade across the page like a giant waterfall is something i havent seen in literature for a really long time. again, im a sucker for characterisation and you absolutely nail it every single time. thank you so much for the work you produce and once again i hope 2021 brings you joy and happiness.

⛩ @chenle - if we’re talking about blogs that fed my skz addiction, it would be a crime not to mention you. i literally vivdly remember sending you an ask saying I dOn’T eVeN kNoW wHo StRaY kIdS aRe YoUr FiCs ArE nIcE tHo and look where we are now. i can sense 2020 was a tough one, as was the case with so many people and whilst a part of me is sad you are no longer writing, i am mostly very grateful for the vast expanse of fics and ideas and stories and headcanons and everything else you blessed your cult with. i sincerely hope you can take this opportunity to rest and rejuvenate and whatever path you choose to take i will support you all the way.

🎨 @ofkimtaehyung - although i mentioned my avid consumption of fanfics, i do enjoy the occasional gifset and fanart too. whilst im past my brief tryst with BTS (she says 👀👀) one would have to be blind to ignore the immeasurable talent you hold. how you manage to manipulate music videos and photoshoots into concert ticket stubs, movie posters and broadway leaflets is honestly beyond me. BTS are already 7 of the most handsome ethereal men to exist and your sublime editing means they end up looking even more heavenly. i hope 2021 brings rewards for your work because it is seriously amazing!

⛓ @anqeluv - your changing aesthetics as well as the 2020 kinktober masterlist were all that i needed to be drawn in. the way you write the filthiest things in the most simple and eloquent manner is severely understated. lots of people tend to go overboard with the ~naughty~ scenes but you keep it the perfect balance of classy and downright filthy which is much appreciated. im very excited to see that you are possibly considering writing for ateez as well - who are one of my newer fav groups! i very much look forward to all that you will bring in 2021 and hope you are safe and well.

🐈 @chaoticminhos - it was priceless that pulled me in and all the rest of your gorgeous fics that have kept me here! and boy am i not complaining. you have such a gentle (ironic for someone called chaos i suppose) way of writing in my opinion, that keeps things flowing and simple without unnecessary embellishments and i just adore it. priceless, in my humble opinion, is such a classic that i keep coming back to. i sit back in awe at the quiet progress of their relationship every goddamn time (as though im reading it for the first time) and im very grateful for the experience. i hope 2021 brings you lots of light and positivity.

there are so many other blogs that have helped me get through this year - whether it be with their creative content like fics, their personalities and jokes shared on their blogs or even advice given to their anons. im sorry i couldnt mention everyone, but do know that if i follow you you hold a very special place in my heart and im very grateful to all of you content creators. people dont appreciate what you do enough, and instead of offering feedback and compliments you get attacked by rude anons demanding more of your work, regardless of what your personal situation might be. you dont deserve this at all and i do hope people have worked on their manners during quarantine now that we have had the time! anyway, to close off, even if you havent done anything this year, im still incredibly proud of you for making it this far. whether we’ve talked before or not (we probably havent im a bit of a hermit i’ll be honest), my inbox is always open. if you need a friend to joke with, a shoulder to cry on, someone to vent to - im here. have an absolutely amazing NYE and lets make 2021 our year!!!!!

[bepoets]

Review for Trish’s Dream Fic

Trish ( @couragedontdesertme  ) said she’d write an epilogue of the elsarik dream Fic if I made a Formal Review of the elsarik dream fic. So here we are.

Please note review should be taken VERY LIGHTLY this is more or less me re-reading the Fic and loudly yelling about things with too many exclamation points. Enjoy Trish.

Ch1

First of all imagine my fucking surprise I didn’t even know you had gotten work done on the dream fic???? Here I was thinking the link you sent me was the next chapter of city of ice and then I click on it and it saYS DREAM FIC???? E X C U S E M E oh my goodness

The first section is just so entirely domestic and beautiful and you can tell how lived in and content they are in their life as roommates. ALARIK (listen my phone autocorrects ALARIK to be in all caps and I’m too lazy to fix it so y’all are gonna have to deal with reading ALARIK’s name as if I’m yelling it every time I type it) anyway ALARIK just bringing her the chocolate croissants she loves so dearly and Elsa curling up with a book and him fretting and worrying over her being there alone all day and later... it’s just SO DOMESTIC. it’s such a small short moment but it’s so domestic and a perfect opposite of the PAIN THAT HAPPENS AFTER!!! And we al know I LOVE READING PAIN

The fact that ALARIK was only home late because he was doing tutoring to earn more money to by Elsa A PRESENT????? Shut up no one speak to me that’s true love but also PAINFUL the guilt he must feel oh my god

Elsa...stops struggling... because she doesn’t want ,,,, ALARIK ,,,, to get hurt. Because she cares for his safety more than her own because he has protected her and he is her friend and she loves him I am going to SCREAM

The fact that you use the phrase ~marching her out of the warmth of the room~ when she just used her magic to like cover the walls in frost makes my Heart burst cause idk if it was intentional or not but I just love the thought that this room has become Home to her it’s become safe and beautiful and lovely and WARM because it is full of love and friendship and companionship rather than the cold loneliness of say her ice palace of her locked room as a child. I like to think Elsa could have covered the room entirely in ice and snow and frost and it would still feel warm to her because of the love that’s developed there thank you for coming to my tedtalk

Ugh fuck hans

I have literally no words other than fuck hans for any section with hans in it I DONT even want to RECOGNIZE THAT HE EXISTS !!! Making Elsa feel like she’s nothing I am going to punch him in the eye

~ALARIK weeps over smushed chocolate croissant. End scene~

I know that it’s such a heartbreaking sad ending for that first chapter but also I really can’t stop laughing about him crying over a stepped on croissant since I know that your like planning note for that last scene was literally just some variant of ALARIK cried over a smushed croissant and that’s just such a funny IMAGE TO ME EVEN THOUGH ITS SAD

I just like to imagine ALARIK cradling the chocolate croissant in his arms like a bébé as he sobs

Ch2

I’m fucking S A D

ALARIK having like NO MONEY and just thinking about that the money he has was going to go to a gift for Elsa and the guard LAUGHING AT HIM LIKE THATS IT THATS ALL YOU HAVE?? Like shut UP HES TRYING TO SAVE HIS BELOVED

P e t t y c h a n g e HE IS TRYING MR GUARD I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW HE WORKED EXTRA TO GET THAT MONEY

ALARIK is so fucking DEVOTED I’m going to run through a goddamn wall I cannot cope. Willing to sell the clothes off his back have you ever seen an idiot more iN LOVE

ALARIK just going willingly cause he has no fight left in him and he just wants to see Elsa even if it means he gets imprisoned too oh my GOD

THE SCENE ITS THE SCENE!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT FROM TRISH’S SUBCONSCIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT STARTED IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

ALARIK wanting to hold her hands when her hands are what are chained up and seen as dangerous and what ~make her a witch~ the absolute love and power that holds.

LET ALARIK AND ELSA HOLD HANDS

“I promised to keep you safe” the pain I feel oh mY GOD

“They’ll KILL you” they’re really out here trying to protect each other at all costs oh my god nothing matters more to the other than keeping the other safe and for that I want to cry and love them and also I want to ram their heads into the wall because wHY WONT THEY JUST PROTECT ESCH OTHER TOGETHER

The PARALLEL OH MY FUCKING GOD

the P A R A L L E L of ALARIK stilling and no longer struggling when the guards threaten Elsa’s death in the same way that Elsa stilled and stopped struggling when they threatened ALARIK’s death oh my god that broke me right there

U g h hans fuck that guy

A N N A !!!!!!!!

When I first read this,,, I DONT know why??? But for some reason??? I didn’t think Anna would be in it???? Which like thinking back on that it makes no sense of COURSE Anna would be in the FIC why would I ever think otherwise. But anyway I was so surprised when she showed up I literally gasped and went ANNA??? Out loud because I was so shocked

ALFAFA GERANIUM

ALARIK really is just so bad under pressure who thought this was a good idea

AG FOR SHORT wink wink nudge nudge cough cough

I’ll be thinking about ALARIK shouting alfafa geranium on my death bed let us never forget

“No harm, no foul” is literally the most fucking Anna line I’ve ever heard. She absolutely would say that to someone who was being question for a crime she’d be like “it’s not biggy”

Why is it that when hans says “BUT ANNA!!!” I hear it like he’s wining like a petulant child I read it like “bUT annNNAAAAA” ugh I hate him

“Don’t scream” *ALARIK’s inner monologue* “this ,, is the story of how I died”

ILL HELP YOU HELP HER ESCAPE!!!!! HELL YEA YOU WILL ANNA HELL YEA YOU WILL

Ch3

My dumbass really went “why are none of the children named neta” before remembering that is the child of Anna and Kristoff and these...are the children of Anna ,,, and .... ugh please don’t make me say his name

I would die for these kids though I love them and I want to protect them at all costs 

Johannes at 5 (and a half!!!!) being a fine soldier GOOD FOR HIM

Isak owns my entire heart from the moment he started fake crying for his mother what a star performer a true Actor he’s too good

Arendellian Royal Guards, are they guards? Or are they simply baby sitters? The world may never know

JOAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One of the babies being named JOAN!!! Hang in there Joan!!!!!!!!! That made me cry oh my god J O A N

Bébé Isak lookout supreme with his big eyeballs and smile and goofy lil salute I love him

The fact that Elsa says she felt stupid for being lured into a false sense of security means she felt secure and safe for literally the first time since she was a child when she was with ALARIK and I cannot properly articulate how much that made me cry I love that so much that has to mean sO MUCH TO HER oh my god

“You have to get out!! Do the magic!!” NO ONE SPEAK TO ME ABOUT ANYTHING EXCEPT THIS LINE FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL MONTHS I LITERALLY WEPT

the use of DO THE MAGIC oh my god AND ELSAS HEART LIKE BREAKING BECAUSE SHE FEELS LIKE SHE CANT

DO ! THE ! MAGIC !

Brave little boy with his mother’s determination saying “be brave. That’s what mama said to tell you” oh my GOD THESE CHILDREN HAVE MY WHOLE HEART OH MY GOD

A rooster crow for the signal COUKD they be more obvious I love these kids they’re ridiculous they are truly the children of Anna

Elsa!!! Chose!! To be!!! Brave!!!

IF SHE TRIED TO SAY GOODBYE TO ELSA!!! SHE MAY NEVER LET GO!!!

SHE HAD NO WHERE TO GO!!! BUT SHE DOES BEVAUSE THERES ALARIK WAITING FOR HER BECAUSE GUESS WHAT

ALARIK IS HER HOME !!!!! HE IS HER HOME !!!! SHE CAN GO TO HIM!!!!

Queue another one of my shocked and delightfully surprised screams as I shouted KRISTOFF????? Because blonde dude driving a reindeer cart

Let’s get you somewhere safe I’m going to cry THEYRE finally together again and they can keep each other safe together as. They. Should.

They are cuddling and my heart is exploding oh my god ALARIK seems so surprised like you big dumb idiot you’re both in love with each other it’s a mutual thing get with the program

SLEEP ELSA! ITS GOING TO BE OKAY! AND FOR THE FIRST TIME IN PROBABLY FOREVER! IT WILL BE!

Ch4

*queue another gasp* there’s only one bed?????

Yea I saw it coming yea I was just as shocked even so yea I got very excited about it wHAT DID YOU EXPECT

They’re cUDDLING and he went to move away and she DOESNT WANT HIM TO they could’ve been sharing a bed THIS WHOLE TIME AND I JUST WANT TO SCREAM BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY

ALARIK laying all the credit on kristoff and the kids when he’s kind of the one that steamrolled the whole plan into happening because he’s the one who showed up ALARIK please give yourself more credit

“You came back” “of course I came back... I couldnt ...” “why?” And then ALARIK refusing to meet her eyes has me absolutely weeping this is the kind of shit I THRIVE ON this is truly a gift to us all everyone say thank you Trish for these three bits of dialogue I will be thinking about them for all my days

ELSA KISSED HIM!!!!!!!!!

Yeah I do lose my shit anytime Elsa is the one to make the first move you go girl you go

THE SPICE VENDOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bringing in all my favorites I am going to cry thank you Trish I love Darius

I SUPPOSE YOU TWO HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN MARRIED

listen I SCREAMED WHEN HE SAID THAT I SQUAWKED!!!! MARRIED!!!!!!

I had been observing you two and just assumed!!!!! You would assume right mr spice vendor sir if they WERENT so stupid for so long it’s okay we understand

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE ??? And Elsa says MARRY US? And ALARIK is going to PASS THE FUCK OUT

He literally got to finally kiss the woman he’s in love with for the first time last night and now they’re getting married poor boy is going to get WHIPLASH from how fast things are progressing but it’s okay im sure he is happy

Elsa’s little vows of just needing each other and keeping each other safe and keeping company and not needing gold or silver ugh TRUE LOVE

And ALARIK hopelessly devoted to her being like I PROMISE

“just you being there no matter what is enough” peak romance true love the devotion the dedication I’m a wreck

LE SMOOCH! LE MARRIAGE! INCREDIBLE I LOVE THEM

~end review~

Okay where is my epilogue please and thank you

[donnieluvsthings]

anyway i’m still thinkin about roceit newsies au...this got SO LONG its basically a bullet fic of the whole plot at this point but uh enjoy!!! its has all the sides and remy and emile bc i rly wanted to shove them all in here aldkaldka

this is based on the musical mostly bc i have never watched the original movie all the way thru oops

roman is jack and remus is crutchie (thanks boop). remus does crazy stunts even with his crutch and roman is Constantly Worried TM and overprotective of remus even tho remus can DEF take care of himself

on the other hand remus knows roman hates working as a newsboy and just wants to escape to some small town where he can become a local artist of some sort. remus wants roman to go CHASE his DREAMS even tho he’s afraid roman might leave him behind

roman may be the actor but remus is great at coming up with gruesome yet intriguing headlines that get people to buy papers and would totally be a great author of some sort

ON THAT NOTE roman dreams of santa fe and can picture it perfectly but whenever he tries to explain it, it comes out as senseless rambling and longing. it’s remus who can really put into words what roman feels (bc theyre bros and they just GET each other)

virgil as davey, patton as les, logan as sarah (its the musical but they have an extra sibling okay. let me have older brother logan)

virgil and patton show up and virgil is super untrusting and hates that theyre basically lying to get people to buy papers but patton is just EXCITED to meet New People!!! and looks up to roman (and remus), like, instantly

it helps that roman promises to take them to a real actual theater after they sell all their papers owned by the one the only emile picani !!!

also roman is the one who first calls him “virge” which is like jack saying “davey” instead of david. yes this is necessary information

so they sell their papers (and roman briefly meets an ESPECIALLY handsome guy wink wink) and go see emile who performs some variant of That’s Rich like the star he is. u cant take singer emile away from me

roman also performs bc i said so. he spies someone watching him during his act up above the stage and climbs up there when he’s done

janus. its janus, if that wasnt clear or u dont know the plot of the newsies musical aldkaldlal

so yeah janus as katherine!! he may be pulitzer’s son but that doesn’t mean his father wants him to be a journalist. pulitzer thinks he should prepare to inherit the publishing company or be a banker or smth, not be a journalist

i just think janus’ “society is a LIE” vibe fits with katherine. i mean, just look at Watch What Happens. “give life’s little guys some ink,” “they’ll storm the gates,” “rich greedy sourpusses” .... idk it just SCREAMS janus to me

ALSO, katherine technically lies about her identity for like 3/4 of the musical, so

anyway! roman meets janus and janus is all suave and lowkey flirty at first but then roman starts flirting BACK and jan is like “uh oh how to talk to cute boys????”

so then he gets all “i have more important things to do” *hair flip* and goes back to the article he’s supposed to be writing about emile’s theater (a lot of his notes are about roman’s performance but nobody needs to know that shhh)

roman draws a portrait of jan and leaves it there and janus gently & dramatically picks it up, stares at it, and tucks it into his suit with a soft smile

uh oh prices for papers went up! virgil steps up and helps roman lead a strike. turns out his caution works GREAT with roman’s determination and they keep each other from going towards extreme overthinking (virgil) or extreme stupidity (roman). they are a TEAM and they are BESTIES.

remus: lets SET THE PAPERS ON FIRE

roman, starry eyed: HECK YEAH LETS DO IT

virgil: how about we dont do that and instead form a union

and then the twins are like GOOD IDEA and tell everyone else. virgil may be a cautious and untrusting and afraid of public speaking but he has good ideas dangit

the intro to seize the day yknow? virgil says a Good Idea (which can probably be traced back to him always listening to logan rant about his studies) and roman spreads the message in a Firm Rebellion-y way to the other newsies

and patton is there doing his absolute best. he may be small but he knows that this isn’t right or fair to the newsboys and he’s ready to physically fight someone

enter logan who is lowkey really proud of virgil for stepping outside of his comfort zone to do whats right. logan may be scared out of his mind for his little bros but he’s gonna help them as much as he can between college and trying to work side jobs to help their fam

basically logan knows janus and tells him that he should report on the strike bc logan wants to help his bros AND his friend however he can

cue janus seeing his opportunity and TAKING it. he’s gonna write about this strike even if no one else will!!! take THAT, father

he also maybe possibly wanted to see roman again. but roman never needs to know that okay what he doesnt know cant hurt him

seize the day happens!!!! they strike!!!! they r powerful!!! but then no one else from any other sections of new york strike with them and they lowkey get rekt

remus mocks the delanceys but that was a BAD decision cuz now theyre targeting him and he gets taken to the REFUGE

roman is SAD bc his brother’s been taken away, no one showed up to help them strike, his brother’s been taken away and he just wants to get OUT of there. run away to santa fe, his ideal world, but he can’t even articulate that because his brother is gone

how is that just act one. how have i written so much yet left out so much???

remus is at the refuge and he’s a little more scared, now, that roman really will just leave him behind even though he knows deep down that roman would never.

still. he writes roman a letter and maybe he goes into a little too much detail about his injuries and the refuge but hey, that’s remus. he writes about how maybe they can run away to santa fe together. he signs it “your brother” and i CRY because they are the best bros

roman reads it and ALSO cries. especially because there it is, the description of santa fe he can never come up with by himself. remus rly does know him, huh

total scene change: janus finds the other newsies (and logan) in a restaurant? bar? and is like “!!! ur on the FRONT PAGE on my newspaper” which i just decided is called the snake instead of the sun

virgil didn’t totally trust janus would follow thru at first but now he’s convinced. they did it!!!! theyre on the front page!!!! the world WILL know!!!!

cue tapdancing!!!!!! king of new york is an absolute bop. i need logan tapdancing daintily and then janus LAUNCHING into some complex tap routine bc the newsies think he too will dance daintily

i know they wouldnt,,, actually dance but just let me have this self-indulgence in this entirely self-indulgent au

the Bro Trio + janus go hunt down roman to show him the paper and find him painting stuff at emile’s all sad and upset bc, well, they lost and remus was taken

but virgil is trying to show him that they made progress!!! sure pulitzer won but he won the BATTLE and actually the poor guy’s head is spinning bc theyre gonna win.

“cmon, ro, if i’m is telling you to be optimistic there must be hope”

see virgil calls him RO and its cute bc roman gave him the nickname ‘virge’ and now virgil’s giving him the nickname ‘ro’ theyre just besties okay

roman is unconvinced but then logan, who roman has actually never met before, steps in with Facts and Statistics, and patton adds some adorable words of encouragement, and janus sassily waves their Front Page Story at him, and roman starts realizing they DO have a chance

but then uh oh pulitzer threatens remus and the Bro Trio and roman is forced to speak out against the strike or risk ruining the lives of everyone he loves. and also he finds out that janus is pulitzer’s son and is Betrayed TM

theres some “he’s just trying to build up a false confidence in u so u can plummet to even greater depths” parallels in there somewhere....u can’t trust many people as a newsie and when roman DOES trust someone turns out he’s the son of the guy ur trying to fight

so roman says overnight in pulitzer’s basement, sleeping on an uncomfortable old printing press, and makes his decision

now for the RALLY

remy is spot conlon bc he DESERVES to be the leader of the brooklyn newsies. brooklyn, flushing, richmond, etc all show up to a newsies rally and are like YEAH!!! STRIKE!!!!

virgil is trying to tame the crowd nervously and keeps waiting for roman to show up bc they work best when theyre working together!!!! finally roman’s there and virgil introduces him (the attention isnt solely on him now thank gosh)

but then roman starts talking about how they dont stand a chance and how they shouldnt go on strike and virgil is just. confused and upset and angry

especially when he sees one of pulitzer’s employees slipping roman wads of money

virgil corners roman afterwards and is absolutely RIPPING into him. roman could fix this if he would just tell virgil the truth, tell him he doesn’t care about the money, he just wanted to keep him and patton and logan safe—

but roman knows if he tells virgil, then virgil will turn all his anger towards pulitzer, will be able to convince roman to keep going, and roman won’t. he can’t put virgil, put his family, at risk.

so he lies.

he doesn’t mean any of it. but he says it.

and maybe he kind of understands why janus lied, too.

he says he’s never had anyone to take care of him or remus, not like virgil does with his parents and his older brother. he says virgil will never know what it’s like.

virgil scoffs and glares and beneath all his fury looks crushed. but there’s still fire in his eyes, a spark roman saw that first day that only grew and engulfed any doubts virgil ever had.

roman says he’ll take the money and go, leave new york behind.

virgil says fine. we don’t need you. because you know what? all those words you said were mine. i didn’t have the courage to say them back then but now i do. we don’t need you.

(because i watched that scene in the movie and like YES go OFF davey i mean virgil)

roman flees to his “bedroom” which is really just a fire escape and just longs for remus’ reassurance. he has the letter but it doesn’t seem as encouraging now, not when he’s lost everything else important to him.

then janus shows up and roman’s mad at him but not mad enough to kick him out. and janus watched roman just give up on everything they’ve been fighting for and just wants to know WHY. why did he turn his back on the newsies when they were so close?

and roman, tired and upset and defeated, just says they wouldn’t succeed. even if all the newsies went on strike no one would report on it, anyway, because pultizer has all the printing presses on lockdown, even the one janus published from. and they already lost once! what more could they possibly do?

roman looks out over the railing, chest heaving from his rant, longing for his imaginary santa fe where he doesn’t have to face his failures. janus stands next to him and puts his hand over roman’s.

“i don’t have a simple answer to that question....but here’s a start.”

and janus pulls out a paper with roman’s words (well, and virgil’s, because virgil said it first but roman rephrased it powerfully, and that’s why they worked as a team) typed out, words that make the strike not about newsies but about ALL working children in the city who are being exploited for their youth and naivety.

it’s an entire article, expertly written. if published it would get the word out to the other newsies that they haven’t given up and show other working children and adults alike that this is IMPORTANT and they aren’t going away.

and then roman remembers his drawings of the refuge and remus’ graphic descriptions and shows them to janus and hey!!! they have a plan!!! they just need to print it....

roman’s like yo there’s an old press in ur dad’s basement he’d never suspect anything

and theyre both so excited and theyre gonna DO this, FINALLY, and janus sees hope on roman’s face again, maybe permanently this time, and janus just leans in and kisses him.

its very sweet and cute and theyre in LOVE

they pull back and kinda stand there awkwardly for a few seconds before both of them start grinning

and they both know its fragile, that they’ve hurt each other and trust was cracked, but it wasn’t broken completely, and they can fix this. they believe in each other and that’s enough for now.

and then they go find virgil at his house

roman knocks on the door and virgil opens it and just. glares at roman. and roman starts rambling apologies and explanations and tries to tell virgil about their plan and did he mention he’s sorry

virgil kinda just stares at him as he goes on and on and the only thing that stops him is patton running out and launching himself at roman

then logan appears behind virgil, and virgil kinda just smiles

“glad to have u back. again.”

and then they go sneak into pulitzer’s basement and print the article with jan’s writing and ro’s drawings and remus’ descriptions and the other newsies go spread the papers ALL around the city

the next morning EVERYONE is out on strike!!! u cant get ANYWHERE without seeing ppl, newsies or otherwise, filling the streets with chants of “seize the day”

roman, with the Bro Trio and Janus trailing close behind, waltzs on in to pulitzer’s office and flings the money pulitzer gave him back on the desk and is like whatcha gonna do NOW, joe??

pulitzer angrily tells them he’s a fool for going back on their deal and logan steps in sayin pulitzer is a fool for letting this get so out of hand over a 10 cent price increase. his sales are down 70%!! objectively the price increase was like the worst business decision ever

virgil’s like plus it’s making u look bad that ur business is the reason most of these kids are suffering. people really love kids, mr pulitzer and patton smiles brightly but in like a menacing way

then emile walks in with a ~dazzling smile~ and is like ur son told me about this whole situation, it’d be a shame if i contacted my good friend governor roosevelt who won’t be as kind as these brave newsies since u tried so hard to stop him from being elected :)

((in the show roosevelt is actually there but i want emile to have a moment to SHINE))

so pulitzer’s like FINE and talks to roman alone and roman wears him down, throwing words from janus, virgil, and pulitzer himself right in pulitzer’s face until FINALLY they have a deal. he’ll lower the prices by half AND pulitzer will buy back whatever they don’t sell full price

roman bursts out of the office into the streets where all the newsies are waiting and is like WE WONNN

and since they published all that stuff about the refuge in the paper, the guy who runs it is being arrested and REMUS IS FREE

the twins hug for like a full two minutes

then pulitzer offers roman a job as a political cartoonist and roman’s like. well idk now that this is over i should probably...head out

bc lowkey he’s thinking virgil still doesn’t wanna see roman ever again and he did say he would leave, so

but then virgil’s like come on, ro, you don’t really think we want u to leave, do u? what’s santa fe got that new york aint? tarantulas? sandstorms? stampedes? you can’t go to santa fe what if you DIE—

and logan says new york’s got us!

patton: and we’re family, right?

then janus is like you got a union to lead! and...you got me.

and remus is like bro, anyone can dream, all you do is close ur eyes! but some made up world is all you’ll ever see. (bc he’s the wordsy one, u see. he helps roman have the poetic realization that his santa fe isn’t real, but this IS)

so roman says well if u guys INSIST.....and then he takes jan’s hand and kinda asks w his eyes and then kisses jan in front of all the newsies who proceed to cheer obnoxiously

when they break apart roman leads janus by the hand over to the paper-buying-cart and slaps some couns down on the table and BUYS SOME PAPERS BC THEYRE NEWSIES BABEY

and everyone lived happily ever after🥰

[ill-find-something-better-later]

Listen, I dont always write fanfic, but when I do it’s because the story exploded into my head and would not let me rest until it was out of my system. So here’s two straight days of frantic word vomit in the form of a 7k Reddie fix-it fic, enjoy

~~~

    Eddie woke up alone, and trapped. The cistern had collapsed, and it was a miracle that he had ended up in a little pocket of air, sitting like he was under a tree in a nice meadow rather than the ruins of a killer alien clown’s underground lair.

    He took a deep breath—at least, he tried to. The air was laden with dust, and his chest hurt like someone had torn it open.

    Which was, he remembered with a shudder, exactly what had happened.

    Despite his best efforts, he started to panic. His breath came fast and ragged. He had no idea where his inhaler had gone, and he just knew the air around him was probably as thick with toxins as it was with deep, ominous, terrifying silence. With one desperate, adrenaline-fueled shove, he pushed at the debris above him. It fell away with ease.

    What had once been a massive, twisted cavern, the home of nightmares, was now nothing more than sea of rubble. Eddie looked around in horror. There was nothing, absolutely nothing; no signs of clowns, or lepers, or Losers, or even a fight at all. He called out, but his voice wouldn’t come. He coughed—then quickly fell into a fit of coughing—and tried again. Nothing but his own echo.

    Panic came full force.

    Eddie scrambled out of his hole, his grave, and stared wildly at the remains of the cistern. He couldn’t breathe. The wound on his chest was closed, but it was burning like mad and, by god, he had died. At least, he was pretty sure he had died. That’s what typically happens after a giant monster punches a gaping hole into your chest. And if he had died, then anyone else could have died, too. Any of the Losers—Bev, Mike, Ben, Bill, Richie—could be buried less miraculously under the ancient debris of fucking Neibolt.

    "They’re fine,“ he said aloud to no one. To himself. His voice was the only thing keeping him from blacking out. “I’m fine, so they’re fine, everybody’s fucking fine—”

    He stopped, realizing for the first time that he was fine. Filthy, exhausted, bleeding in a few places, and sore literally everywhere, but fine. And somehow alive again, despite being convinced that he had definitely died.

    "I’ve got to get the fuck out of here,“ he whispered.

~~~

    The Losers, or what remained of them, stayed in Derry for over a week after everything had ended. Bev wasn’t ready to go home, back to real life and her shithead soon-to-be-ex husband. Ben stayed for her. Bill and Mike had been trying to help wherever they could, and Richie…

    Richie could hardly get out of bed.

    His phone had been ringing constantly since before they had even faced the clown. Angry managers and publicists trying to drag him back to LA. But now more than ever, he couldn’t face them, couldn’t face anyone. Richie was different now, with all these memories crammed back into his head, all this fear, and regret—all this fucking love that would never have anywhere to go. How could he possibly just go back, pretend nothing was different?

    The others came to him in shifts. For the first couple days, he wouldn’t even let them in, but it got too annoying to listen to them through the door.

    Bill tried to relate, sharing stories about Georgie that were more comforting than Richie wanted to admit. He stuttered less, now that Pennywise was gone, but he was especially smooth when he spoke of his brother.

    Mike assured him that it was all over. They were free. He said Eddie was a hero and, yeah, Richie fucking knew that, and it didn’t make it any easier, didn’t make the hole in Richie’s heart any fucking smaller. But it was nice to remember, if only briefly, the determined jut of Eddie’s jaw, the spark in his eyes.

    Ben was obviously a lot more clever than Richie had ever given him credit for. He knew way too much. Richie tried not to flinch when he mentioned how “especially close” he and Eddie had been. But Richie wasn’t blind either, and he figured Ben’s thing for Bev wasn’t that different, really. Except Bev was still alive.

    Bev. Richie had always been close with her. They had bonded a lot over vicious rumors and cigarettes, once Richie had warmed up to her.

    She didn’t say much. The first time she came in to see him she had simply sat down in a chair by the bed, and offered him a smoke.

    "The detectors don’t even work,“ she had said. “I already checked.”

    This had produced the first thing even slightly resembling a smile on Richie’s face. “Good ol’ Bevers,” he slurred into his pillow. “Raised like a real scoundrel.”

    They had sat together like that for a long time, Richie slumped against the headboard, smoking like a chimney. It didn’t do much for him, but the habit was familiar. And sitting up, at least, had to be a step in the right direction.

~~~

    As it turns out, getting stabbed through the chest, dying, being buried in rubble, and then coming back to life really fucking sucks.

    Eddie had managed to dig his way out of the cavern, though he had cut his hands up in the process. It wasn’t the way they had come, if that way was even still standing. He had crawled for a while through a small tunnel, trying and failing to ignore how filthy the stone was, and the open wounds on his hands and face. Every movement sent a shot of pain across his chest. At one point, he had stopped and checked on it, only for his heart to skip several beats when he saw the angry red scar across his ribs.

    "I should be dead,“ he said to himself. “I totally died.”

    Without his inhaler, Eddie hadn’t managed to take a good deep breath since he woke up, so his only comfort was ranting aloud. Part of him was worried he might draw unwanted attention, but there had been no sign of Pennywise in hours. Or maybe minutes.

    "Hard to tell when you’re fucking underground.“

   ��Eventually the tunnel widened, and he was able to stand. His legs protested, and the pain in his chest made little black flecks dance across his vision, but he did it anyway. The floors were still uneven and the walls were slimy, slowing his progress. A few times he wondered if he would ever make it out, if he would be stuck down here forever. Maybe he wasn’t even going the right way. Maybe Pennywise’s last trick was to resurrect him just so he could die alone, covered in filth, in a fucking sewer.

    "Fuck that,” he muttered hoarsely. “Fuck that, and fuck him. You can do this, Eddie, just keep moving.”

    He pictured the other Losers, alive and well and waiting for him. A few times, he caught himself smiling, picturing their faces when he turned up in one piece.

    Bill would lose his mind. He had waited a long time for someone he had lost to come back, and Eddie was doing just that.

    Mike would ask a million questions. Call Eddie a hero or something, which would be ridiculous because he hadn’t even fucking killed the thing.

    Bev would probably cry. So would Ben, if he had to guess. Eddie might cry, too, even if Richie teased him for it.

    Eddie liked to think that Richie might, for once, just shut the fuck up.

    Eddie liked to think that maybe, for once, he would force him to.

~~~

    By the end of the second week, Richie was mobile. He would drag himself out of bed for the sake of getting some coffee, or some bourbon to pour into it. His friends would cheer him on in their own ways, and it wasn’t nearly as pitiful as it sounded.

    "Baby steps,“ Bill would say to him, "it’s all about b-b-ba-baby steps.”

    The weather was too nice. Richie found it profoundly inconsiderate to his mood. He would open the window in his room to smoke with Bev, despite the dead smoke detectors, because he could still hear Eddie in his mind.

    "You’re sucking in first and second hand smoke, dumbass. That’s twice the cancer. Besides, those smoke detectors are there for a goddamn reason, you know. This place is one giant fucking fire hazard, really, someone should call the fire department, or OSHA, or something because—”

    Richie would let the rant play out in his head, which was probably pathetic. But it was all he had, and if he had to leave Derry eventually, forget about Eddie forever, then he would cling to that nagging ghost as long as he fucking could.

    It was on the tenth day post-Neibolt that Bev asked him what his plans were. She wasn’t the first to ask, but she was the only one Richie felt obligated to actually answer. Which is why he had hoped she never would.

    "I mean, what else is a hack comedian supposed to do?“ He shrugged, an effort to look fine when he really, really wasn’t and probably never would be. “I’ll go back to LA eventually. Maybe I’ll even still have a career if I’m real polite about it.”

    "I get it,“ Bev said, blowing a cloud of smoke out the window. "I don’t think I could ever feel ready. But we can’t hide here forever.”

    "Maybe you can’t.“

    "Rich.”

    "Don’t “Rich” me,“ he said lightly. "I could totally just spend the rest of my days wallowing in this room until I wither up and die. Can’t be hard.”

    "Eddie wouldn’t want that.”

    Fuck that. Fuck that, and fuck Derry, and fuck evil clowns, and fuck absolutely everything else.

    "Eddie had a wife to go home to,“ Richie snapped, voice breaking. "So does Bill, and you have Ben, and Ben has you. What do I have? A big, empty apartment where I can drink myself into a coma and hopefully forget that I’m forgetting him? Fuck that.”

    Bev blinked at him, cigarette dangling between her fingers like she had forgotten she was holding it. “Richie, is that what you’re worried about? Forgetting again?”

    He stared at her, and then stared out the window, taking a drag. “What can I say, I’m a weepy little bitch. Sue me.”

    Bev rolled her eyes, which was as comforting as it was insulting, honestly. “You won’t,” she said insistently.

    "What?“

    "You’re not going to forget Eddie.”

    "How the fuck do you know? What, the ol’ clown sent out a memo that I missed or something?“

    She laughed, and the sound was so unexpected that Richie snapped his mouth shut with a muted click.

    "You won’t for the same reason that I won’t forget you, or Bill, or Mike. We’re friends, Richie, we’re Losers. Pennywise is gone and we’re the ones who killed him. He can’t take our lives from us anymore.”

    Richie hadn’t thought of that. Mostly because his thoughts had been occupied with Eddie’s lovely eyes, his sharp smile, the sound of his voice, and all the other flavors of him that Richie would never taste again. He had been so frantic at the thought of losing those memories that he hadn’t considered that he never would.

    He couldn’t leave Derry with Eddie by his side, but he could at least carry the memory of him. And, shit, that had to be worth something.

~~~

    That was a light. Eddie was certain of it, that was a light!

    He had been trudging through sewer water for what felt like days. His body was screaming for him to stop, and he had never ignored so many of his own maladies in his life. The tunnel had gone from uneven rock, to uneven brick, and Eddie had briefly convinced himself that he had turned around and was headed back into Its lair.

    Then the brick became smoother, worked, rounded. When Eddie realized that he was now walking through the sewers of Derry, he actually teared up a little. He never thought he’d be so happy while standing ankle deep in grey water.

    And now, finally, finally, he could see the literal light at the end of the tunnel. It was faint at first, and he had already had a few false starters—the glint off of a glass bottle, a trick of the eye. This time, however, the light grew as he moved closer.

    He broke into a jog, though it was more of a controlled stagger. Water sloshed loudly around him, dragging at his feet, and the sound echoed through the tunnels.

    Eddie started to panic again. He was so close.

    What if this was Pennywise’s last trick? What if Eddie was still trapped down there, and this was all just an elaborate vision? The tunnel would collapse right before he escaped. That awful laughter would float up from behind him. The water would rise, his wounds would reopen. He would die all over again. He would never see Richie, would never hear his dumb jokes or his stupid laugh. He would never get the chance to shut him up the way he had always wanted to. He was so close now, dammit, so close…

    Sunlight.

    Warm, blessed evening sunlight.

~~~

    The Losers finally departed from Derry in sequence. Bill went first, since he had a deadline, but it took a day and a half of convincing to get him going. Ben and Bev left together, and despite himself, Richie wished them the best.

    He was going to miss them. They never would have left until Richie was okay again, and although he was far from fine, he was no longer scared to leave all of this behind. It was actually kind of baffling, to think that he had been nervous to leave Derry fucking Maine in the rearview.

    Still, he didn’t leave until the afternoon. The New England sun was nice this time of year, and Richie was trying so hard to focus on that instead of bottomless chasm in his heart. His future felt empty in a way it never had before. Apparently forgetting Eddie while he was still alive left Richie with more hope than remembering him dead. Funny how that works.

    Only it wasn’t funny at all.

    When he finally loaded his things into the car, and said a final farewell to Mike, it was well past noon. Richie took the long way out of town, hoping for one last grab at closure.

    He had been to the kissing bridge a handful of times, back when he was growing up, but no more than anyone else. Mostly because he was terrified of the one spot in the whole world where he had let his secret see the light of day. As he pulled up to the old bridge, he dug around for his pocket knife.

    The carving was faded, weathered to match the wood around it. Richie crouched down and ran the point of his knife over the letters until they were stark enough that he could read them through the tears in his eyes.

    R+E

    He sat there for a while, for once just letting himself cry.

    Then he stood, wiped at his face, said a soft goodbye, and left.

~~~

    The sun was setting over Derry fucking Maine, and Eddie Kaspbrak was there to see it. He stumbled out of the sewers and collapsed into the shallow water of the river, gasping in the fresh air. He was filthy, sore, tired, and fucking alive, and fucking free. For a moment, he didn’t even bother with caution, splashing the water right onto his face. When he looked up, he felt the fading sunlight on his cheeks, a faint breeze tugging at his hair, and he laughed.

    Then he stopped laughing because it fucking hurt.

    It took an immense amount of effort to pick himself up again. He had to make it back to the hotel, to the other Losers, to Richie. It was impossible to tell how long he had been down there, but his first priority was getting to them. The rest could come later.

    The walk back into Derry was shorter than his trek through the sewers, but it felt like more of a hike. About a mile, mostly uphill, through the woods in the dying daylight. It didn’t help that every odd shadow had him jumping straight out of his skin. When he finally saw the light of town, he practically ran.

    Being back in civilization was like finally waking up from the nightmare to an unfamiliar room. He was okay, he was going to be fine, he was alive, but it wasn’t home. He wouldn’t be safe and sound until he found the others. Which was still fine, because he was almost back to the hotel, and he could practically see them turning to look as he came through the door. The shock on their faces, the disbelief, and then they would be on him, and it really would be okay. Richie would say something stupid, Eddie knew he would, and that’s when he would shut him up with— 

    The hotel was empty.

    The lights were all off, despite the relatively early hour. No one was there when he went inside. The lady who ran the desk in the back said that all the guests had checked out. They were gone.

    Eddie asked if he could use the phone. She glowered at him, clearly not happy about the dirt and various other substances he was coated in but she pointed to an old landline. Eddie had absolutely nothing, no wallet, no inhaler, not even a pen. But they had all exchanged their phone numbers back at the restaurant, and Eddie had only bothered to remember one of them.

~~~

    Richie was almost an hour away from Derry when his phone rang. He figured it was his manager again, or his publicist again, or maybe someone else who wanted to bite his head off for disappearing for weeks. He glanced down at the screen. No name, but the number tickled something at the back of his mind. He let it go to voicemail.

    He didn’t think he had room left in his brain for more long lost memories.

    A few minutes later, it rang again. Richie glanced down, saw that same number, and cursed. Maybe it was Mike, calling to tell him that Pennywise had a son or something, and the terror was only just beginning. He let it ring out again, as a nagging feeling grew in his chest.

    When it rang again, Richie caved.

    "Listen, you can’t expect me to keep putting up with this shit, okay? One supernatural showdown a year, that’s the new rule. I am capped out! What the fuck more could you possibly want from me?“

    There was a silence, just long enough to make him nervous. And then…

    "Richie?”

~~~

    There was a terrible screeching sound on the other end of the line. Eddie heard Richie curse, and then rustling, and then silence.

    No, not quite silence. Richie was muttering something barely loud enough to be noticeable. Eddie strained his ears, and made out enough to discern the familiar chant.

    "This isn’t real, this isn’t real, this isn’t real.“

    And Eddie understood, he really did, but it didn’t stop the flare of indignation. He was just so desperately relieved to hear Richie’s voice, and he was a little delirious, and he had died, and there had been several tense minutes where he didn’t think Richie would pick up the phone and, well…

    "I am totally fucking real, you dipshit!” He practically snarled it, earning another glare from the lady behind the desk. “You would know that if you were here right now. What the fuck, dude?”

    Richie didn’t immediately answer.  His breath was rattling through the receiver in short bursts, and Eddie was almost sorry for snapping at him.

    "No,“ Richie choked out. "No, no, no, no, you’re not. You were… you're… I was fucking there, and you were…”

    Eddie sighed, the anger draining out of him and leaving him empty. “Yeah, I was, Trashmouth. And now I’m not.”

    There was another pause, filled only with the awful sound of Richie’s ragged breathing, and it sounded too much like one of Eddie’s nastier asthma attacks. Eddie wanted him to be here, and not just a voice on the phone.

    "How?“ he finally asked, voice too small, too unsteady to belong to Richie Tozier.

    Eddie sighed again. "I don’t fucking know, Rich. Look, I’m back at the hotel, and I don’t have my wallet or literally anything else. I don’t even know what fucking day it is. Just please tell me you’re not on the other side of the goddamn country." 

    There was another curse, and more rustling. When Richie spoke again, his voice was more sure, a hint of urgency hidden beneath it. "I’m not, I… I left like an hour ago.” A pause. “Had to pay my respects to your mom.”

    His voice cracked as he said it, and Eddie decided to ignore that. “Fuck off.”

    Richie’s breath audibly hitched, and Eddie ignored that, too.

    "Give the phone to the lady,“ Richie said hoarsely, "I’ll get you a room. But don’t get the wrong idea or anything, I don’t do prostitutes anymore.”

    Eddie rolled his eyes, scoffed, and handed the receiver to the sour-faced woman. He didn’t trust his own voice now, worried it would give away the chest-bursting relief that had come over him. Richie was okay. He was only an hour away, and he was coming back, and he was okay.

    The woman rattled off several questions, and pecked at the keyboard of the ancient computer in front of her. A minute later, she curled her lip and passed the phone back to Eddie.

    "You’d better be fucking real, Kaspbrak. I’m pretty sure I just got ripped off.“

~~~

    The irony of driving almost twenty miles over the speed limit for the sake of Eddie Kaspbrak was not lost on Richie. He had almost crashed the car once, at the first raspy sound of Eddie’s voice. Now he was hurtling down the highway at breakneck speed, back to Derry, back to him.

    Richie still wasn’t sure he was even awake. Part of him was absolutely certain that this was some awful dream, that he would get back to Derry and Eddie would be just as dead as when he left. The other part, the one that was playing and replaying Eddie’s voice in his head, was almost sick with hope.

    He had been crying ever since Eddie had told him to fuck off in that just-barely-fond voice that he so rarely used. It had occurred to him, of course, that Eddie would have a field day with that, but he couldn’t stop.

    Eddie was alive. Eddie was fucking alive.

    Alone, and probably hurt, and definitely pissed off, but alive nonetheless. Richie would have had a much harder time believing it if he hadn’t fought and killed a giant, shapeshifting killer clown two weeks ago.

    He was so close. It was a miracle that he hadn’t been pulled over, but he pushed his luck even further anyway, creeping up toward one hundred. He was so close.

    There was a paranoid little voice clamouring in the back of his head, shouting things like "trap!” and “danger!” and “impending doom!” Richie ignored that voice.

    Eddie was alive.

~~~

    Eddie was falling apart. He had made it back down the hall, up the stairs, and into the room before the miles of crawling, stumbling, digging, climbing, and fighting to survive finally caught up to him. Three steps past the threshold, he collapsed.

    The room was empty, but it had clearly not been that way for long. It reeked of cigarette smoke. Eddie slumped down onto the floor, and lay there for several minutes, mind blank. Then he started thinking about all the awful little things crawling around in the carpet, and he became acutely aware of everything still coating his body.

    With a new surge of energy, he hauled himself up and into the bathroom. There was no first aid kit, no isopropyl alcohol, no sterile bandages, but at this point Eddie would settle for an incredibly hot shower.

    He almost lost his balance getting in, which made his heart plummet in his chest. But when he stepped into the water, his whole body unwound like a cut wire. The grime of the sewers fell away, sluicing off his skin and draining back to where it had all come from. Eddie watched his own blood circle the drain, and shivered despite the scalding water.

    Richie had barely left, and he wouldn’t have been far behind the others, so it couldn’t have been all that long since Neibolt collapsed. Eddie figured two days at the most. Unless Richie had decided to stay.

    "Had to pay my respects to your mom.“

    Eddie shook his head. A fog of delirium and exhaustion blanketed his mind and was clearly affecting his judgement; Richie wouldn’t stay any longer than the others. He shut off the water.

    Eddie wrapped himself in a towel and left the bathroom, lungs clogged with steam. It wasn’t until he was standing in the middle of the room, strength once again draining from his limbs, that he realized his only clothes were no more than filthy rags. He fell down onto the bed, and cursed at the ceiling.

    Several minutes later, there was a knock at the door.

~~~

    Richie made it back to the hotel in less than forty five minutes. There had been one more close call when he got off the highway a bit too fast and fishtailed, but he had made it in one piece. After he pulled into the parking lot, he barely remembered to turn the car off before scrambling out of it. He barreled through the door, up the stairs, to the same damn room he had been suffering in for the last two weeks. Figures.

    It was then that he finally slowed down, stopped. Eighty miles, and he had never let himself doubt this, but suddenly he was paralyzed with nerves. What if Eddie wasn’t there, and he had been drawn back to this room as a sign that he really should just curl up and die in it?

    His chest was tight. He took a breath.

    With a shaking hand, he knocked on the door.

    A second passed. Two. Three. A silence just long enough for Richie’s heart to stop beating.

    "It’s open.”

    Then it started again, full throttle, slamming against his ribcage as he opened the door.

    Only for it to skip, soar, and drop through the floor all at once.

    Eddie was lying on the bed in nothing but a towel, hair still wet from the shower, covered in cuts and bruises. There was a massive, raw scar where Pennywise had run him through. The hole in his cheek had closed, but it hadn’t completely healed. His chest was rising and falling in short movements, like he was struggling to breathe.

    Richie was dangerously close to bursting into tears again.

    After a moment of silence that seemed to stretch for hours, Eddie turned his head to look at Richie. The movement was slow, almost wary, as if Eddie was just as terrified of Richie being a lie. They locked eyes, and fuck—

    Fuck. Eddie was real, and alive, and right the fuck in front of him.

    Richie took a shallow breath, and then another. His throat was all twisted up.

    "You look like shit, Eds,“ he whispered.

    Eddie’s face twitched, brows sliding down into an all too familiar scowl.

    "Yeah, well you’re no fucking portrait, asshole.”

    Richie shuddered, and suddenly he could breathe again—he hadn’t been able to breathe in weeks—and then he was laughing. Before he really thought about it, before his brain could catch up with anything, he was striding over to the bed and sitting down next to Eddie.

    His skin was too pale, making all the bruises and blood stand out harshly. Richie reached over and brushed his fingers over the large scar on his chest. His body was warm and solid.

    Eddie went stiff, but made no move to pull away. Richie, not really realizing what he was doing, traced the scar lightly with his fingertips. It spread across the lower half of Eddie’s chest and down over most of his stomach. Richie could still see Pennywise’s claw protruding from the spot, dripping with Eddie’s blood.

    "How the hell did you survive this,“ he muttered.

    Eddie shrugged mechanically. "I don’t think I did.”

    Richie snapped his eyes up to meet his. There were more questions, a thousand more, but they all died as he met Eddie’s gaze again.

    He snatched his hand away, finally realizing where it was, what it was doing. Eddie seemed to realize something, too, as his face regained some color.

    "Hey, Rich, you wouldn’t happen to have a change of clothes I could borrow, would you? Mine are covered in sewage.“

    Richie’s brain finally caught up, and his own face grew hot. He nodded, mostly focused on not staring at Eddie’s half naked body now that it had sunk in that Eddie was half naked. "Yeah, obviously,” he stammered, “in the car. I’ll, uh, yeah.”

    He stood, and Eddie sat up but didn’t follow. He looked dizzy.

    Richie practically sprinted to his car. It took three tries to get it unlocked, his hands were shaking so bad. As if Eddie would disappear in the thirty seconds it took to haul his shit back up to the room.

    When he came back, Eddie was leaning his elbows on his knees. He looked bone deep tired, and Richie knew exactly what that was like. He dropped the suitcase on the floor and flung it open.

    "Most of this shit’s been worn already,“ he said. "Just once, but I know how you are.”

    "Where’s my stuff?“ It wasn’t an angry question, really, but Richie’s blood ran cold anyway.

    "It’s, um… Most of it’s in my car, actually,” he mumbled. He had taken what remained of Eddie’s things the second night after defeating Pennywise. None of the Losers had said anything about it. Richie had hoped it would help with his grief, and it had, just a little. “I could go get it, I was just in a hurry, and I—”

    "No, it’s fine. Just give me something comfortable. And nothing with your fucking face on it, either.”

    Richie scoffed without really thinking about it. “You think I would wear my own merchandise? I can’t believe you think so lowly of me, Eds.”

    "Shut up and give me some clothes.“

    "What’s the rush?” Richie grinned. He couldn’t help himself. This was the back and forth that he hadn’t been getting from Eddie’s ghost in his head. “Are you that eager to get into my pants? You’re so much more forward than your mom.”

    "Richie, I will fucking strangle you.“

    "Not the kind of foreplay I expected, but I can work with it.”

    Eddie threw a glare at him, and Richie was filled with the usual buzz from his undivided attention. He wasn’t even ashamed of it now. It was better than anything he had felt in weeks.

    He dug out a pair of sweats and his last clean T-shirt, trading insults with Eddie as he did so. It was a tired exchange, and neither of them were on the top of their game, but it was so sweetly familiar that Richie felt drunk. Eddie went into the bathroom to change, and Richie had to resist the urge to shout at him through the door.

    When he came back out, Richie’s words died on his tongue.

    The shirt was too big, and the pants pooled at his ankles. Eddie was glaring at him like he was braced for an onslaught of teasing. Richie hated to disappoint, but his heart was up in his throat, and all he could think about was how amazing it was that Eddie was actually here, wearing his fucking cookie pants.

    When he didn’t immediately say anything, Eddie rolled his eyes and shuffled back over to the bed. “Quit fucking staring, asshole, it’s not my fault you have a lamp post for a body.”

    Richie watched him settle on the bed, not bothering with the blankets. He looked exhausted, but he didn’t close his eyes, didn’t even pretend to fall asleep. Neither of them spoke for a moment. Richie was scrambling to get his voice back when Eddie broke the silence.

    "I thought you might be dead.“

    His voice was small, a little breathless. Richie blinked at him, and finally found words again. "What?”

    "When I woke up,“ Eddie went on, "I was buried in the rubble, and I was worried… I thought that maybe you guys were buried too, that the whole place had come down right on top of us.”

    Richie was hit with a sudden wave of guilt. Eddie had been down there for weeks, and they had left him there. “Fuck, Eds,” he breathed. “Fuck, I—I’m sorry, man, I tried to get you out of there, but it was happening so fast.” He turned away, shifting so his back was leaning against the side of the bed. “I would’ve stayed down there with you, but Mike and Ben dragged me out.”

    He heard Eddie take a breath. “Then you really would’ve been dead, idiot.”

    Richie huffed out a laugh. Bev had said nearly the same thing on the eighth day, after Richie had snapped at Bill for not letting him stay in that sinkhole.

    "Richie…?“

    It was really nice to hear Eddie saying his name again, even if he sounded like he was about to have a mental breakdown. "Yeah?”

    "How, uh… How long was I down there?“

    Richie sucked in a breath, let it out, felt the weight of too many nightmare-fueled sleepless nights dragging at his body.

    "Almost two weeks,” he sighed.

    "What the fuck!?“ Eddie barked, sitting up so fast the bed shook. Richie craned his neck to look at him, and Eddie stared back with wide eyes. "Two weeks? I was dead for two fucking weeks?”

    Richie’s stomach dropped at the words. “What the hell do you mean, you were dead?”

    "I was fucking impaled through the torso, dumbass, of course I was dead. What, did you think I was just taking a nice stroll through the sewers? For two whole goddamn weeks! Jesus, that can't—I mean, that can’t be fucking possible, right? I would have started to decay. My pancreas would be digesting itself, and my cells would be breaking down, and maggots would—!“

    He cut himself off, too busy hyperventilating to continue detailing the slow process of his own decomposition. Richie really wished he had brought Eddie��s bag, oversized clothes be damned. His inhaler was gone, burned up and buried beneath Neibolt, but he probably had a backup somewhere.

    Instead, panicking, he climbed up onto the bed and took Eddie’s face in his hands. "Eddie, hey, Eds, fucking look at me.”

    Eddie’s eyes were wide and endless, a shade of brown that Richie could stare into for hours—but he focused on the glossy fear in them instead of his own stupid heart.

    "Listen, I don’t know how, but you’re not dead. You’re right here, and there’s no maggots, or clowns, or fucking disease zombies, or whatever. It’s just me.“

    Eddie’s brows drew together, like he was reaching for some conclusion and couldn’t quite connect the dots. His breathing was starting to slow down, though.

    "Just you,” he wheezed. “You were…so close. An hour away.”

    Richie wasn’t sure where he was going with that. He shrugged. “Yeah, I had only just left. We all stuck around for a while. Kinda hard to just pack up and go home after… y'know, all of that.”

    Eddie stared up at him for a moment, doe eyes doing cruel things to Richie’s heart. Then he grabbed Richie by the waist and pulled him forward.

    Richie tried to breathe, but it was difficult with Eddie’s face pressed into the crook of his shoulder, and the smell of generic hotel soap scrambling his senses. He held himself still, unsure of what to do. Then Eddie started shaking, and Richie broke from his stupor to wrap his arms around him.

    "Eds?“

    "Don’t fucking call me that,” came the unsteady reply. Richie swallowed the urge to tease him, to break the tension that hung in the air, to mask his racing heart with humor.

    "You probably ought to get some sleep,“ he said instead. "Maybe we can figure this out in the morning, when we’re not, like, in shock, or whatever.”

    Eddie hesitated before nodding against Richie’s shoulder. He waited even longer to finally loosen his grip, wiping at his eyes as he turned away.

    God, Richie wanted to kiss him.

    Eddie rose from the bed with visible effort. Richie helped him turn down the covers, waited until he was settled, and then moved for the chair in the corner. It was an old piece of shit that made his neck hurt just from looking at it, but it would do for tonight. He was halfway through wadding up his jacket for a pillow when Eddie called out to him.

    "Rich, this is gonna sound weird…”

    Richie grinned. “Weirder than coming back from the dead, or just typical Derry weird?”

    "Shut up. I just… can you just come over here?“

    "I was just getting comfy,” he sighed, even as he stood.

    "No you fucking weren’t.“

    Richie laughed, though he tried not to. He was starting to get slap happy, and combined with the shellshocked elation he was trying to process, he was a bit off his rocker. Eddie blinked up at him from the bed.

    "Well? The fuck do you want?”

    Eddie rolled his eyes. The color that rose in his cheeks was visible even in the dim light of the lamp, which they had both silently agreed to keep on. Without saying anything, Eddie shifted over until there was just enough room on the bed for one more. Richie took an embarrassingly long time to process this.

    "Oh come on, shit for brains, just get in,“ Eddie snapped.

    Richie almost couldn’t hear him over the rushing of his own heartbeat in his ears. Slowly, he slid under the sheets. The bed was warm where Eddie had already been laying. Richie reminded himself to breathe, somehow struggling more with this than the unexplained resurrection of his best friend and lifelong love.

    Eddie shifted, shoulder brushing against Richie’s and sending his brain spiraling. “Thanks, by the way,” he whispered. “For coming back.”

    Richie nodded, not trusting himself to look at Eddie. “Yeah, no problem.”

    He wanted to say more, but his thoughts were too jumbled to really make sense of them. There was one persistent question, though.

    "Why did you call me? I mean, Mike’s still in town.“

    Eddie was silent for several moments. And then he said, quietly, "You were the first person I thought of.”

    Richie didn’t want to overthink that, but he knew he was going to. “Oh.”

    Silence stretched again. Richie let it sit for long enough that he could safely assume Eddie was asleep before saying more. “Y'know, just for the record, I would have come no matter what. Even if I was all the way back in LA. I’d always come back for you, Eds.”

    He was just starting to think he was in the clear when Eddie let out a sharp breath and clutched at Richie’s sleeve.

    "I love you.“

    The erratic beating of Richie’s heart stopped cold. He finally looked at Eddie, who had turned over and pressed his face against Richie’s arm. Tears leaked from his tightly closed eyes, running across the perfect bridge of his nose and dropping onto the pillow.

    "Fuck. Eddie…” he trailed off, not sure what to say. Eddie loved him. This night was getting more and more unreal by the hour. “That’s, uh, really not something you want to hear from a guy who’s crying.”

    Eddie snapped his eyes open. Christ, they were beautiful. Big and brown and sparkling even when he was furious. Shit, especially when he was furious.

    "Are you fucking serious right now?“ he hissed. "You’re gonna joke about this? You know what, never mind, I fucking hate you.”

    "Aw, c'mon, Eddie Spaghetti, don’t be like that.“

    "Fuck off,” he fired back, trying to turn away. Richie rolled over and hooked an arm over him, pulling him close.

    "Hey now, you’re the one who wanted me to share a bed with you, the least you could do is cuddle.“

    "Let go, Richie.” Eddie wriggled, but Richie held him tight. Fuck that, he wasn’t planning on letting go for at least a few weeks, if ever. “I swear to god, I’ll knee you in the balls.”

    "Don’t do that, I might need them later.“

    "Yeah right. Like I’d ever want to get anywhere near your unwashed dick.”

    "I never said I was gonna need ‘em for you, Eds.“

    Eddie stopped squirming and looked Richie in the eyes, which was unfortunate, since Richie was trying to banter and those eyes always left him speechless.

    "Shut up, Richie,” he whispered, and his breath brushed across Richie’s mouth a moment before his lips did.

    Richie had figured that if this really was a dream, this would be the moment he would wake up. That was how it always worked when he dreamt of Eddie, ever since they were kids. They would go for the kiss, and he would startle awake with a pounding, aching heart, and a cold sweat on his brow. The cycle of his entire repressed childhood.

    But he didn’t wake up now. Eddie’s lips pressed into his, hungry and hesitant at the same time, and it was so much better than any dream. Richie pressed back, just as desperate, and way too strung out to care. It felt more real now than when he had first laid eyes on Eddie, first touched him.

    Eddie was here. Eddie was alive. Eddie was in Richie’s arms, and was kissing the breath right out of his lungs.

    And Eddie loved him.

    When they pulled away from each other, Eddie’s eyes would hardly open. Richie smiled, and even though he couldn’t see it, he could tell how ridiculously soft he probably looked.

    "You should come back from the dead more often, Kaspbrak,“ he sighed.

    Eddie managed to roll his eyes before they drifted shut again. He gave a weary grunt, and offered no further comment. Richie watched him for a moment, but he was struggling to keep his own eyes open, and he was warm, and safe, and happy for the first time in over a month. Scratch that, in years.

    Just before he fell asleep, he reached up and pressed a kiss to Eddie’s forehead. "I love you, too, Eds. Always have.”

    He felt it just before he slipped away, Eddie’s arms holding him a little bit tighter.