#cripple self love

[spoonful116]

The most punk thing you can do as a disabled person is love and value yourself and not push yourself past your limits for the sake of other's approval

[super-nova5045]

sylvia plath, todd anderson and virginia woolf (aka ACTUAL tortured poets) watching taylor “im breaking up with my boyfriend for his intense depression and blaming it on him, im dating a racist who enjoys watching woc being brutalized and harasses young woc artists, i sent my fans out on a hate train to attack a young woc actress for a line she had to say as part of her job to show how mentally ill her character was, im dating a maga supporter, i refuse to say anything about a current genocide despite being the most influential person in the world right now, i am a billionaire, i fly 13 minute flights and have the highest carbon emission of any celebrity, i am a known white feminist who only speaks about issues when it affects me and has constantly let my fans get away with extreme racism and even encouraged it by associating myself with known racists” swift call herself a tortured poet (her writing sounds like a bunch of thesaurus words slapped over gabba hanna and rupi kaur-esque poetry that was created purely as a trinket for an edgy pinterest board)

[ezzied]

hey btw tumblr punks. some of you guys are mean. being mean is not punk. it's okay to be angry. but don't take it out on others. remember everyone is human and makes mistakes. fight for your rights but love the good people around you. don't let people tell you you're weak for loving, or fighting, or being angry. punch nazis and hug your friends. we're doomed but we're doomed together. lets go down with love if we have to go down at all.

[crazycatsiren]

I can never appreciate my mobility aids and sensory aids enough. ♿️♾️

My canes, forearm crutches, and rollator, noise canceling headphones, stim toys, and sunglasses, they are my freedom and joy. With their help, I'm able to get out of the house. I'm able to be out and about to enjoy things. They improve my quality of life. They are my support and my friends.

[jasontoddenthusiastt]

Imo Jason is “irredeemable” by default because I don’t see what he needs redemption from.

[milotheshrike]

The Little Transmasc (an art reference) dms are open if you have specific tastes

[keshetchai]

As someone who enjoys religion blogging/discussions, I've come to realize that it's a good practice to be aware of the general signs/symptoms of religious-OCD thinking (aka scrupulosity), because if the conversation is taking on all the hallmarks of scrupulosity, it's actually a definitive sign that we cannot meaningfully and compassionately engage in a conversation about religion in a healthy way. I've actually had this play out a significant number of times online, and when I realized what it was, I also began to realize that the intrusive thoughts/obsessive and compulsive thinking are only ever fed by continuing the discussion with that person.

[[ Important edit to clarify why I am saying it's not healthy — made after I went back to look for more concrete facts about OCD or anxiety (I have GAD, not OCD, but many resources overlap since they're both anxiety disorders):

When Reassurance is Harmful — this explains how/why reassurance-seeking specifically about an OCD fear is a compulsive behavior, and engaging with reassurance-seeking interferes with recovery/management/treatment.

This table from the Anxiety Disorders Center lists key differences between Information Seeking and Reassurance Seeking.

This IOCDF page on Scrupulosity info for Faith Leaders identifies "symptom accommodation" as enabling. Two of the examples of doing this by participating in the OCD behavior are: "Engage in excessive conversation focused on if-then scenarios (e.g., "If I did this, then would X or Y happen? And what if Z was involved? How about W?")" And, "Repeatedly answering questions about ‘correct’ religious or faith practices."

That page also goes on to outline more info about reassurance seeking. "Although providing answers to (often simple!) questions may seem harmless, providing reassurance serves to maintain the anxiety disorder cycle." (This BMC psychiatry article cites a lot of related studies establishing this.)

The IOCDF page on What is OCD and Scrupulosity? ]]

Imo, the responsible thing to do is to recognize that (even if the other person hasn't outright stated it/isn't diagnosed)* the conversation is not about religion, it is about needing mental health support from professionals and experts. Talking to me, the layperson who enjoys chatting theology and my religion — is not only not helping, but is actively harmful. I'm not just talking about the person who I replied to today, either. Like I've said, I've seen this happen dozens of times in various online forums.

*[while I am against diagnosing strangers on the internet, it's important to realize A) lots of people don't know what Scrupulosity is, so it's possible they've never considered this is a mental health concern that could be treated, and that B) for the purposes of my concern, it doesn't matter if they actually have diagnosed OCD. The only thing that matters is that their thought-process causes them genuine distress/fear, and every response given to them seems to only incite new/additional distressing questions/thoughts, or further entrenches the original distress.]

Ultimately, any discussion aside from "you might want to speak to a mental health professional about scrupulosity OCD" seemingly puts me in the position of feeling as if I am being used for their self-harm. I hate that feeling. I do not want to be leverage for fear and pain. I have GAD, I despise the idea that I am making things worse.

No matter how much I love religious discussion, the answer in these cases is always "please reach out to an OCD specialist/mental health professional. I am not qualified to discuss this." And then to stop there. I have never once seen anyone stuck in this compulsive thought spiral be reassured or feel any better by hearing from someone else's approach to theology handled with things like empathy, compassion, logic, or even atheism. It doesn't matter what we say, how we say it, or how we relate to our own religion. The urge to engage in this kind of conversation in order to chat about religion is a sign that we are not equipped to help.

You can't have a conversation here, because intentionally or not, ten times out of ten, you are adding fuel to the fire. Just like people can't simply tell me something that would erase/talk me out of my ADHD/depression/anxiety disorder, you also cannot simply argue/reassure/persuade people out of scrupulosity. We should not try. We have a responsibility to consider that it's outright harmful to do so, and to disengage.

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

Just had the most psychotically evil realization right as I was about to fall asleep

[zoomclown]

TMA/ Red Valley shower thoughts

just thinking today about the differences Warren Godby and Jonathan Sims.

Like Jon's fatal flaw is that he will do anything to aquire knowledge. He needs to Know everything, and be known.

Warrens flaw is that he will do anything to remain ignorant. The truth of his past was literally handed to him and he refused to take it. He would rather avoid knowing or thinking about his past in favor of taking a nap for several months at a time.

Jon runs from physical danger, but pursues knowledge, Warren runs from knowledge but throws himself headfirst into physical danger.

Yet both are just pawns in someone else's game. Someone who is using them as a tool to meet their own ends. Someone who is using what they don't know against them.

Just shower thoughts.

[haru-se]

BLUE LOCK CH. 260 SPOILERS UNDER CUT

In the trivia for Blue Lock Exhibition (if I remember correctly), Kaiser’s habit is that he wraps his hands around his neck as if choking himself.

I wonder if that habit that comes out when he’s stressed stems from his abusive dad choking him all the time.

Like when he started feeling like he was losing to Isagi, he purposely reminds himself that he’s trash by choking himself. His competitiveness/need to win is from the fact that when he wins, he’s EVERYTHING but when he loses, he’s NOTHING.

He has to win because what is he without it?

Also, the reason why he hates milk is probably because of his dad as well.

[nightmareonpeachstreet]

self-indulgent headcanon time:

I headcanon that Furina has 2 dogs. their names are Philippe and Jeanne Marie, they're poodles and they're treated like doggy royalty.

Neuvillette gave her her first puppy hundreds of years ago and ever since then it's been absolutely vital to make sure she always has at least 1 dog in her care at all times. They're basically her emotional support animals and she probably couldn't go a single day without them unless you want to deal with the ensuing meltdown.

she'll take this secret to her grave, but the reason she loves dogs so much is because she never feels judged by them, or like they secretly think she's incompetent and a failure. they simply just love her for what she is.

[the-marshals-wife]

fathers that don't treat their daughters like burdens are so cool. i wish they were real.

[majaurukalo]

Disabled people who shit talk their disability (and other disabilities) and think less of themselves if they don’t overcome their disability and are so full of self-hate and even go to social media or television to spread that kind of thought always raise in me some mix feelings.

The first reaction is anger. I’m angry at them for spreading such an abysmal view on disability and other disabled people and basically downgrading all the amazing work real disabled activists do everyday to make us see as humans and for having such horrible thoughts of a community they belong to.

They also trigger a very sensitive spot inside of me and I think they shouldn’t be given a platform to talk in such a way.

But then I try to calm down and rationalise and remind myself that I was in their shoes once.

That is basically internalised ableism which I, as many other disabled people, suffered from for a very long time.

Throughout my childhood and teenage years I would shiver at the idea of ending up in a wheelchair, I prayed that I would be healed and “fixed”, I would cry myself to sleep just to be normal. I hated myself.

I didn’t know any better. My parents didn’t teach me a better view because they didn’t know any better either.

You know what helped me accept and love myself? The disabled community.

All the amazing disabled creators, who talk about this topic in a healthy, empowering way.

So what I think is… disabled people who still suffer from internalised ableism are not our enemies. They are just people who haven’t found this community, who are still processing this difficult reality (and maybe they are newly disabled so that’s even more understandable). They are traumatised, they are suffering from the toxic views the able-bodied society puts on us. They probably don’t have a healthy support system, maybe just family and friends who are pushing them to get fixed, who are telling them to not give up to that kind of life. They think they are unlovable.

So let’s not shit on them. Let’s not insult them because that’s not how they will feel welcome into the community.

Instead, let’s encourage them to change view. Give them positive and empowering disability resources and examples.

[crazycatsiren]

I see a lot of positivity posts that focus on "you're not broken".

But what if I am broken, but it's not a bad or negative thing?

What if I am broken, but it's simply a neutral description?

What if I am broken, but it's ok?

[rxsewqter]

i am proud of myself okay i am eating i'm slaying i'm giving it's not taking away (literally had a breakdown 5 hours ago)

[nenoname]

still thinking about how the commentary said that ford recognising stan's intelligence is more important to him than getting an apology.....

stan's hopes for their reunion being ford telling him that he wasn't stupid and that their dad was wrong about him....