#cw: cancel culture

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I fought the personification of cancel culture.

[stewpid-soup]

VENT CW!! STAY SAFE!!

anyone else find it exhausting to just enjoy things?

I don’t want to support people or companies that are actively doing things that are bad (racism, homophobia, defending SA, etc etc). but it’s so mentally draining to look through all of this terrible shit and not be able to enjoy things bc of their creators or ppl associated with it

i mean, i don’t support dream. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. I don’t support dream or the dteam as a whole - but the dsmp was such a big comfort to me through quarantine, and even now i still love the storyline and the characters.

HP, well that’s self explanatory. JKR is just a shit person and i’m not gonna give her my money bc i enjoy the plot of HP. I just take fanon on its own for the most part. I own the books and the films already (my family loves HP and has for a long time, since before JKR was outed as a transphobe) so i don’t need to buy anything from her. HP was a huge part of my childhood and the thought of not interacting with any content related to it makes me so sad, because i still love it even now.

and as controversial as it may be, i’ve enjoyed hazbin and helluva boss for years now. it was another comfort during quarantine, and i watched it with friends and got to bond over it. i do not like vivziepop or support her, and it’s exhausting to see all this back and forth about her online bc it’s so confusing. I love these shows and it makes me so happy that I get to see hazbin come together after waiting so long, and the same goes for helluva boss. of course there can be improvements to the way vivziepop writes some characters, but i still love these shows so much. it hurts my heart to feel like i can’t enjoy the content because the creator is such a bad person.

and then the number of musicians i’ve had to stop listening to because they turned out to be shitty people. or actors i avoided watching content of because they’re bad people (especially when the list of ppl who support Israel came out- of course im not supporting anyone on there, but some of the ppl on there just rlly hurt my heart because ive enjoyed their content for so long)

i know there’s not really any way to avoid this, as people are complex and can be an asshole w/o you knowing. funding people like this isn’t something i want or care to do, so of course i actively avoid it. but I just don’t know what to do when it comes to this.

a friend told me that it’s sort’ve about picking and choosing things, because you never know what people are really like. they said that with the state of the world, it’s important to stay educated but don’t let shitty people get in the way of things you enjoy. i’m just at the point where i feel like i can’t enjoy anything because anytime i get stuck in a rabbit hole of content, i see people going back and forth about who should be cancelled and who actually isn’t a bad person. cancel culture is one of the worst things about the internet, and it just makes interacting with fandoms even more toxic than it already is.

ig this is just a rant talking about comforts i have that i feel like i can’t enjoy anymore because of cancel culture and just like..people being people? i’m just so tired of finding something i enjoy and then learning out that they are or possibly could be doing/supporting something bad and just— it makes me feel so guilty because i don’t want to indirectly/directly hurt anyone. i know what i believe in and what i do and don’t support, at least for the most part (still learning everyday atp), but it doesn’t make it any easier to part with things i hold so dearly in my heart.

does anyone else feel similarly? if so, what have you found that helps or at least is a comfortable middle ground?

idk bro, my life is so exhausting with everything i deal with in real life- so to feel like i can’t even find comfort in my silly little shows anymore is really depressing. my mental health is not doing well lmfaooo

[hegrowth]

unpopular opinion but having to look up info about fcs before I use them is tedious and depressing. I think being informed is important but like. I want to use an fc because they vibe with my character, not because I agree with or relate to or like them, you know ? but one wrong fc pick and I'm being canceled for supporting a shitty person. :x

[tommyssupercoolblog]

We'll watch one video essay on smthn we actually like an care about (the cinematography or art in a movie we like, theme park history (I LOVE that shit), the orgin of neiche memes, etc) and then a hundred people we've never heard of show up in our reccomended like "why everything you've ever seen is problematic and gross and you should feel bad" "why this thing is shit and horrible and no one should like it bc it's poor quality" "why this trope is TOXIC" "why this thing everyone loves is bad actually" "why this celeb was cancelled and is the antichrist" like

OH MY GOD SHUT UPPPPP SHUT UP I DO NOT CARE I LITEREALLYY DO NOT CAREEEEEEE STOP ITTT STOP I DO NOT CAREEEEEEE PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP LIKE LITERALLY SHUT THE FUCK UP OH MY GODDDD

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia, sorry if this is an unwelcome suggestion but have you ever thought about setting up a gofundme page for your medical expenses?

I'm sure a lot of your followers, myself included, would reblog it if we couldn't donate ourselves and it would reach more people and get more donations.

Just a thought. I hope you consider it

Hi anon,

At the moment I'm just not a stage where I'm comfortable accepting money directly for health stuff in that sort of formal manner. I can afford to eat, and I can - for now - afford my medical bills, so now is not the time to be asking for anyone's charity, because I can afford to live. Plenty of people can't.

With the Patreon, that's set up to be about the writing, and that's what I like about it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not ruling it out in the future. There may come a day where the kind of treatment/s I need necessitate a Gofundme, but for now, things like the Patreon account are really helpful, and work out, because to me, it's not 'money for nothing' so much as a genuine income for writing reliably for folks.

If I need a break from the writing or need to put the Patreon on pause, it'll come with a lot of forethought about it. So far I'm handling January pretty well writing-wise and I think I'll hit my minimum monthly wordcount. I'm keeping an eye on things, and if the situation gets more dire I'll definitely stay flexible and keep thinking on it, but for now I'm steady.

Thanks so much for your care though, anon :)

[the-innefable-idiot]

As of 15 minutes ago I just got my first hate comment in a RNM Malex+Forrest fanfic I wrote in 2020 and I feel so honored!

First I want to thank the academy for such an honor, and also my mom who has always loved and support me, and, of course, all the readers that made this dream possible 😭

Take a look at this AUSGAISHAISH it's so funny I don't know where to start

[whenitgrowsbright]

cancel culture sucks ass. how many anxiety attacks have i had over it? too many to count!

[itsspelledkloee]

Possibly controversial:

I feel like just because something was created or started by someone or a group of people with bad intentions, doesn’t mean it cant be turned into something good.

For example, I have heard a lot about how Wicca (the religion) is horrible because the people who created it took inspiration from some not so nice people, but the thing is, many Wiccans have changed the religion so that it no longer has those negative attributes.

Or another one: starseeds, indigo children, etc. they started out with lots of racist undertones and such, but now the ideology has morphed into an ideology about helping all humans evolve spiritually and alien souls.

The thing about these is, if we “cancel” (I hate using that term but it fits here I guess) everything that has had racist, antisemitic, sexist, homophobic, etc. ties to it, without acknowledging that these things can change over time and become accepting and actually progressive, then literally nothing is safe!

I’m not saying everything is salvageable and I’m not saying anything about things like closed practices etc. but we use historically racist/sexist/homophobic/ableist inventions all the time without realizing it!

I just feel like the huge emphasis on learning where things come from and taking responsibility for your traditions (which is a good thing to do) has turned into not letting anything grow into much more progressive ideas because we feel like if something was once discriminatory, it always will be no matter what because of its past.

[purebleedingneon]

Think I'm gonna hide out on tumblr for a bit. VRChat and Twitter are bringing me so much anxiety because of how many people I've met who refuse to listen to or believe that someone I follow whose been through trauma. Being completely honest, before I even knew what I was even doing, I was the same way. Being groomed and constantly surrounded by people who like a certain type of shit Will generally get you interested in that shit. You do it to feel cool, to feel safe in the community even if that community isnt really safe. Of course, as soon as you find out it's bad you gfto and try to stay out the best you can but trauma (especially ptsd and childhood related trauma) can bring you right back to where you started because the feeling of being "back there" can be gratifying for mental se//lf ha//rm. I trust that the person I follow is safe and doing their best not to go back to that content, recovery is hard and relapsing is unfortunately part of the process but every time you get up from being knocked down is another time you're better than your past. I believe that most people are just trying to do their best to be better than yesterday, and I guess if I get cancelled for that it's whatever. I'm just scared of losing community. I'm scared of being hated. But either way, I'll go on. I know it. I know I'll be okay. No matter who I associate with and no matter who hates me I'll be fine. My anxiety will pass and I will recover.

[bringmemyrocks]

"On Zionist Feelings"

By Dr. Randa Abdel Fattah, excerpt below

https://mondoweiss.net/2023/12/on-zionist-feelings/

Last month, Jewish Zionists were “outraged,” “profoundly saddened and disappointed,” and felt their ‘safe space’ threatened and disturbed by three actors in a Sydney Theatre Company stage production who wore Palestinian keffiyehs during curtain-call. Donors withdrew, a petition garnered over 1000 signatures, one performance was canceled, three board members resigned, and the company went into a frenzy of damage control and issued statements of apology about “safe spaces,” “harm,” and “offense.” One board member resigned because there was “no apology from the artists” for a gesture that “traumatized Jewish members of the audience.” Resigning from the company’s philanthropic foundation in protest, another prominent donor Judi Hausmann wrote, “I never imagined my resignation would be necessary because I’m a Jew.” In all these instances, expressions of Zionist fragility expose a calculated, purposeful strategy of insisting on the status of victim when confronted with the material fact of Palestinian existence and the solidarity of others. That the cultural presence of the keffiyeh on stage is enough to trigger Zionists in the audience and Zionist board members reveals how the fragility of Zionist privilege is being challenged at a moment of global awakening and reckoning of the genocidal violence of the colonial settler project. The keffiyeh, as a symbol of anti-colonialism and anti-racism, thus disrupts the Zionist narrative of victimhood and centers Palestinian resistance as a struggle for freedom and self-determination, supported by people across the world in their thousands, in their millions. What is grotesque in the weaponization of Jewish ‘trauma’ over a symbol of cultural significance is the fact that at that very time, the Palestinian death toll from Israeli airstrikes and bombardment had reached over 15,000. It is now over 25,000.

Dr. Randa Abdel Fatter does an amazing interview with Mohammed El Kurd below, but read the article first. Both are quite short, cw for mention of violence.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

In case you all aren't feeling seen today

CW: Regarding the lack of renewal.

I know we're all still raw, but I wanted to show you how many places have seen us and our loss today so far. Even IMDB made a post about it. Don't lose hope loves. These places know how much OFMD means to us.

https://theplaylist.net/our-flag-means-death-creator-david-jenkins-confirms-show-hasreached-the-end-of-the-road-20240308/

https://tvline.com/news/our-flag-means-death-season-3-update-cancelled-max-comedy-1235185207/

https://www.escapistmagazine.com/our-flag-means-death-creator-addresses-chances-of-series-return/

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-news/our-flag-means-death-no-new-home-max-cancellation-1235846639/

https://ca.movies.yahoo.com/movies/flag-means-death-creator-says-160716939.html

https://www.comingsoon.net/tv/news/1591849-our-flag-means-death-is-officially-done-after-not-finding-new-streaming-home

https://www.upi.com/Entertainment_News/TV/2024/03/08/no-revival-for-our-flag-means-death/6531709897319/

https://screenrant.com/our-flag-means-death-callenation-confirmed-no-new-home/

https://www.joblo.com/our-flag-means-death-new-home-officially-dead/

https://cartermatt.com/644717/our-flag-means-death-season-3-not-happening-creator-confirms/

https://www.gaytimes.co.uk/culture/our-flag-means-death-creator-officially-confirms-show-cannot-be-saved/

https://www.inkl.com/news/our-flag-means-death-canceled-after-two-successful-seasons

[moraxsthrone]

⊹✧˚｡⋆ title — sir kaeya

⊹✧˚｡⋆ pairing — k. alberich x f!reader

⊹✧˚｡⋆ wc — 5.7k

⊹✧˚｡⋆ cw/an — nsfw. mdni. alcohol consumption (duh it's kaeya). kaeya being a bit of a tease (duh it's kaeya). oral (m & f rcv'ing). snowballing (how fitting). clit slapping. this fic sprang forth from the very first genshin thing i ever wrote (the scene at angel's share) so it's really special to me. kaeya was my first genshin love and will always be my favorite. 💜

surprising as it would be to most, you’d never been to mondstadt before this week’s multi-regional summit. as a diplomatic representative of your region, many would guess that you’d been all over teyvat. but you’ve only held your current office for a little less than a year, and although you did your best to absorb as much information and knowledge as possible from your predecessor, it’ll take a lot more time and experience than what you have so far to be as efficient as they had been. so, for now at least, the job keeps you busy - too busy to travel for pleasure.

so when the final meeting of the last day gets canceled, rather than go home early you take the opportunity to do some much-anticipated exploring of the city of wind and its culture. 

“i’m famished! pray tell, sir kaeya, where would you recommend we go to enjoy the most authentic dishes of mondstadt?”

kaeya alberich, cavalry captain of the knights of favonius, has been charged with keeping you safe. as your security detail, he accompanies you almost everywhere you go - keeping a low profile during policy meetings - blending in with the background while also being close enough to stand between you and any potential threat or danger.

“we?” he asks, looking slightly confused. “will someone else be joining you?”

“if you’ll be so inclined…” you say before biting your lip and looking away shyly.

“me?”

you’d have to be blind not to have noticed his striking good looks the moment you were introduced to him on the first day, and it certainly wouldn’t hurt your feelings one bit to allow the captain to keep you company. likewise but unbeknownst to you, the gorgeous knight has stolen a few glances of you when you’ve been too busy to notice. he has especially enjoyed your pretty smile and the sway of your hips when you walk. more than once he’s allowed his gaze to linger on your curves perhaps a little too long.

“but of course! i don’t want to eat at a restaurant alone while you just stand there and watch. can you think of anything more depressing?” you joke.

“you make a valid point,” he says with a quiet laugh. “very well. allow me to treat you to good hunter. you’d be hard pressed to find a more impressive menu! miss sara makes a mean sticky honey roast - i can’t recommend it enough!”

as the two of you dine together, you enjoy easy conversation, becoming better acquainted with one another. when kaeya introduces you to miss sara, she goes out of her way to prepare for you a sampler of sorts, citing it as the perfect solution to your conundrum of deciding what to order because everything looks so tasty. she also insists that your bill is on the house, refusing to take any mora you offer, but you leave behind a handsome tip anyway. if nothing else, you want miss sara to have it as thanks for her warm and welcoming hospitality.

“what would you like to do next, m’lady?” kaeya asks, walking alongside you towards the city’s center.

you should be used to this title by now, but something about the way the cavalry captain looks at you when he says it sends a small rush of heat to your cheeks.

“oh, i don’t know. why don’t you surprise me?” you say, flashing him a coy smile, which he finds irresistibly adorable.

he takes you to marjorie’s souvenir shop before leading the way to the anemo archon statue in front of the cathedral. from there, the two of you take a stroll outside the city walls, engaging in playful banter along the way. your personalities blend well - he’s pleasantly surprised at your ability to keep up with his wit, and his charm wins you over with ease. by the time the sun is setting over the edge of the western horizon, your conversation is flowing effortlessly. the two of you haven’t been able to shut up for hours when you ask him,

“so where’s the best place to get a drink in this town?”

the knight’s smirk spreads into a full smile as he hums. “i know just the place.” 

⊹✧˚｡⋆

the tavern is packed, and you’re inclined to believe kaeya’s got that pirate blood he claims to have since he’s standing on one of the big wooden tables, surrounded by other rambunctious patrons of angel’s share, singing along with the bard’s songs about legends of sea and treasure. their energy is contagious (obnoxious if you ask diluc who just rolls his eyes and shakes his head from behind the bar). 

you’re right there with them, clapping and laughing when kaeya reaches out, takes your hand, and pulls you up onto the table with him. neither of you are sure if the visible heat on the apples of your cheeks is because of the alcohol or because of the sudden proximity of your bodies. with an arm around your waist he pulls you right up against his side and wow! he’s more powerful than he looks. the song is about finding love on the run and kaeya is acting out the lyrics with you, embarrassing you to no end but you’re having too much fun to ask him to stop, so you just go with it. 

the song’s story ends with a kiss and you think you might just die when kaeya’s arm flexes against the small of your back, fastening your hip to his thigh. he brings his lips right up to yours, but they don’t quite touch. your eyes go wide as you stare into his periwinkle orb that sparkles with mischief. he practically whispers the last line of the song, his dandelion wine breath wisping over your lips. 

the cheering of the men around you grows distant, drowned out by the blood rushing through your ears. 

kaeya’s heart pounds against the palm of your hand resting on his chest.

you watch with bated breath as his ice-blue eye darkens with his diamond pupil. he shifts his weight and your knees feel like jelly when his lips but graze yours before he smiles and pulls away with a laugh. 

raising his cup, he cheers along with the surrounding audience before hopping off the table. setting his drink down, he reaches for you again, this time to help you off the table. you accept, and he pulls you closer before his deft hands clasp your waist, lowering your feet to the floor. 

a tease that kaeya alberich, you think, but a chivalrous one. 

while you find yourself mingling with other patrons it seems kaeya never lets you out of his sight. he’s never too far away, engaged in his own conversations with some of the other locals when you look over to find him looking at you over the rim of his wine glass. 

when one of the gentlemen offers to buy you a drink, kaeya seems to appear out of nowhere and places a hand on your lower back. 

“oh, that won’t be necessary,” the knight interjects, voice filled with cool honey. “all her drinks are on the knights of favonius this evening, but a kind gesture, i’m sure.” 

“why, sir kaeya, if i didn’t know any better i would think you’re trying to keep me all to yourself tonight,” you say with a teasing lilt.

his lips part as a slight blush appears on his cheeks, but he quickly recovers. “just performing my knightly duties to keep you safe, m’lady.” 

when you’re ready to go, kaeya’s having such a good time that you don’t want to end his night. so you make your way to the bar to pay your tab, only to be told that your drinks have been bought and paid for already (oh, he wasn’t lying).

you wander out into the cool night, the sound of the crowd and the smell of booze muffled behind the thick wooden door. no longer had it shut behind you than you feel your back being pressed against the tavern’s exterior wall. you gasp, only to breathe easy when you find yourself pressed between the wall and your now-tipsy chaperone.

“thought you could get away so easily, hm?”

your eyes are glued to his smirk. those lips that promised to kiss you earlier won’t soon leave your mind.

you laugh breathily while giving his chest a gentle push. “i didn’t want to put a damper on your fun.”

“who said my fun is over for the night?” no sooner than the words leave his lips, his eye widens as he quickly realizes how inappropriate it was to say that. “oh dear, it seems i’ve forgotten my manners. please accept my apology, m’lady…”

his panicked attempt at clarification is interrupted by your laughter. “relax, sir kaeya. i won’t hold it against you.” 

he really wishes you’d stop calling him that. it makes his dick twitch every time and you both know his pants will leave little to the imagination if he gets a hard-on.

he stumbles walks you back to the goth grand hotel, removing his cloak along the way and draping it over your shoulders when he notices you shivering in the cool night breeze. when you reach your door, he lingers as you unlock it with the intention of ensuring you make it inside safely. the bolt unlatches and you turn to face your chaperone again. 

he’s looking down at you and opens his mouth to bid you good night when you pull him in by his shirt and kiss him. it’s a huge risk, one you never would’ve taken were it not for the liquid courage coursing through your veins. maybe he isn’t really interested in you and that’s the reason he didn’t kiss you earlier.

much to your relief, he kisses you back. passionately. 

his warm tongue swipes across your bottom lip and you eagerly chase it with your own. you slide your fingers inside the opening of his shirt, balling it in your fist to lure him inside. his chuckle is low and breathy when he smiles against your lips which never leave his as you slam the door with your foot and push his back against the nearest wall.

“hahh…who knew you could be so forceful, m’lady?” he pants.

“sorry, but…” you say between kisses, carding your fingers through his soft hair, “...you teased me earlier and…” another kiss, “...i really wanted that kiss,” you finish with a whine.

“well, why didn’t you just say so, hm?” kaeya says, sucking on your lower lip with a hum.

his thumbs slide under your top, massaging little circles into your skin. there’s not a hint of humor in his voice when he rolls his forehead against yours and rasps, “i’ve been wanting to kiss you until you can’t breathe anymore…”

in one swift motion, kaeya spins you around effortlessly until your back hits the wall, his cloak falling off your shoulders as he catches your gasp in his open mouth, making it clear to you that he’s the one in control now. his fingertips dig into your lower back and pull your hips from the wall, forcing them to collide with his so you can feel what you’re doing to him. you let out a quiet moan at the feeling of his semi pressing against your thigh. his lips leave yours to venture along your jaw before trailing down the column of your neck, his blue hair fluttering in your breath and filling your senses with the cool, clean scent of his cologne.

you reach down and fumble with kaeya’s belt, swearing at it under your breath when it doesn’t cooperate. with one hand and a couple flicks of his fingers, it hits the floor with a clamor of leather and metal. you have much better luck with the fastenings of his pants, his lips returning to yours with a shuddering breath just as you free his cock and start stroking his wide shaft, so hot and hard.

he quickly pulls his gloves off and hikes your skirt up to your hips, exposing your creamy thighs.

“so warm…” kaeya whispers, raking his long, slender fingers along your skin until he reaches your apex. “n' so wet…”

“hhhgods fuck…” the words leave you in a huff, making him groan when you rub your thumb over his slit to collect his slick bead of pre. “f-hnn-fuck me, kaeya~”

with your blessing, he wastes no time pulling his now fully hard cock out of your hand in favor of grabbing the backs of your thighs and picking you up. you lock your ankles behind him with a whimper, the back of your head rolling against the wall when the underside of his dick glides over your dripping pussy lips through your damp panties. kaeya’s got two handfuls of your ass, his deft fingers curling and pulling your underwear to the side to let his leaking cockhead seek your naked opening. he begins to push himself inside, dropping his forehead to your shoulder with a long groan as his tip pops through your tight ring. 

you cry out, one of your hands flying to the wall behind you as you loop an arm around his neck for stability. kaeya spreads his legs a little further apart for leverage as he sinks a little deeper inside you, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist. before he’s even fully sheathed inside you, he retreats just to push in again and starts fucking you, slow and shallow. he’s barely halfway in and you already feel so full, the thick vein on top of his shaft rolling under his skin as he pushes and pulls at your slick, gummy walls.

“so tight~” he breathes, open lips ghosting across your face as he goes for your lips again. “are you okay?”

all you can do is dumbly nod as your eyes roll back behind fluttering eyelids and a huff of a laugh bubbles from his smile. “feels so good…so good to me, kaeya~” 

you’re practically singing for him already and he hasn’t even bottomed out yet. it would probably go to his head were it not for the fact that he’s too far gone from the wet heat of your pussy sucking him so hard, the lip of your ring catching on the head of his cock with every draw of his hips, driving him too crazy for his ego to remain intact anymore. 

your elegant neck is exposed to him, letting his open lips drag along your moistening skin as your back moves up and down the wall with his thrusts. kaeya’s long, slender fingers grab your jaw and pull your lips to his. you’re so nice and wet for him that your need is spreading to his hips and balls. the sound of his thighs hitting yours when you finally take him all the way goes straight to your head. it’s one thing to feel kaeya fucking you, but hearing him fuck you - moist slaps of skin, his quickened breaths and quiet groans so close to your ear - it’s driving you out of your mind.

the cryo wielder pulls you away from the wall, your hot tongues swirling as he carries you to bed. his fingers squeeze the plush of your ass, guiding you along his throbbing shaft as he goes. kaeya lays you down before reaching behind his back to unlock your ankles and spread you open for him. 

he pulls out and stands up, looking down at you and letting out a breathy chuckle when you whine a little at the loss of his girth. but the view is delicious so you don’t complain. his rigid cock is thick with a large vein running his length and an angry, almost purple cockhead that’s dripping with fresh precum. his tan shaft glistens, wet with your slick. it bounces under its own weight as he kicks his boots off and pushes his pants down. 

you both watch the other undress with urgency; he makes quick work of his shirt as you shimmy out of your skirt. save for the battle scars, his lithe body is flawless - tall with long, lean muscles. seeing him like this makes you bite your lip and rub your thighs together.

kaeya’s lips curve into a small smile as he crawls towards you on the bed, his hands gently caressing the tops of your thighs as he kneels between them. he leans down to kiss your cheek, his long rat tail licking your breasts. “you are so fucking beautiful,” he says, barely above a whisper. “i've been dying to taste you…”

a sigh leaves your lips as he makes his way down your body, kissing and licking, sucking and nipping in all the right places. his breath feels so warm against your skin, save for the few times he purses his lips to blow cool air on the spots he just licked. he swirls his tongue around one of your nipples, only to replace it with his cool fingers while he gives the other the same treatment. the juxtaposition of warm and cool makes you arch off the bed, moaning when your clit brushes against his naked belly. 

gradually, kaeya makes his way further down, ghosting kisses along your bikini lines as his hands spread your thighs open just a little more for him. he watches your dewy petals unfold for him, exposing the hard little bud they’ve been hiding. “fuck…” he mutters, “...such a pretty pussy…”

“kaey-” you start, but your voice is cut off by a gasp when his warm tongue swipes swiftly along your slit. a single periwinkle eye stares up at you as he flicks the tip of his wet muscle over your clit, soft and light as a feather. he’s teasing you. you can see the mischievous glint in his eye as he dips his tongue into your hole. finally, his lips latch onto your needy clit, making your hips leave the bed when you thrust into his mouth. 

his taste buds rub your tiny erection, your flavor making him moan as he sucks you harder. one of his hands finds yours, your fingers interlocking while his other hand grabs and kneads at your heaving breasts, your soft tummy, and the plush of your thigh. 

he pops off you, drool and slick coating his chin. “your flavor…fucking delectable~” he breathes before diving back in.

he nearly sends you over the edge when he pushes two of his long fingers inside your clenching cunt, curling them to find that unmistakable rough spot within. your walls squelch helplessly around him as he finger-fucks you. your free hand grabs and pulls mindlessly at his hair, hips rocking to fuck his pretty face as he gives you the head of your life.

“ohh~ kaeya~” 

the searing coil that’s been spooling deep in your belly is getting impossibly tighter and when the cavalry captain hums on your clit, the vibrations send you. you cry out for him, back arching, walls clenching around his curled fingers. he pins you to the bed with his free arm and moans, a wet spot forming where more of his pre leaks out of his throbbing cock when your fists tighten around his cerulean locks. you cum for him, thighs clamping around his head while his tongue pulses over your clit until you’re fully spent.

kaeya situates his hips between your legs, wiping your spilled essence from his flushed face with a breathy chuckle before pressing the underside of his cock between your slippery folds. you taste yourself on his tongue when he kisses you, and he relishes your gasp when his swollen cockhead catches on your overstimmed clit. 

grinning against your lips, he says, “oh? feeling a little sensitive, hm? perhaps you’re not quite ready to take my cock again so soon…” he teases, pulling away but you squeeze your thighs around his hips, impeding his escape and making him laugh.

“i can take a lot more than you think, sir kaeya…” you purr, twirling a strand of his blue hair around your finger.

there’s that glint in his eye again when he licks his smirking lips. “is that so, m’lady?” he croons, reaching between your bodies to grab the base of his cock. biting his lower lip and holding your gaze steady the cryo user slaps the head of his cock hard against your clit, swallowing your cry at the sharp pressure. “fuck,” he groans. “you make the prettiest sounds for me…”

“so mean,” you whine, digging your nails into his biceps when he pushes his blunt tip inside you.

he drops his mouth to your ear as he slowly spreads you open around his girth, whispering, “...and you love it.” 

his sultry voice shoots down your spine straight to your core, making him moan deliciously when your weeping walls clamp down on him. kaeya starts slow and even, pulling almost all the way out before easing himself balls deep a few times, making you feel every inch as his cock drags and pulls along your slippery insides. 

the lingering effects of your orgasm have left you even tighter than the first time he fucked you. he can already feel the heat pooling at the base of his spine, his balls drawing closer to his body when his hips begin to snap. there’s no way he’s going to get enough of you before he cums. you feel too fucking good - the way your little cunt is squeezing and sucking him so hard, drooling and soaking his entire length as he fucks you. the pretty little sounds your mouth and your pussy make for him…your whines and cries of his name, the slurps and squelches of your juices all over his cock. 

he’s got to get more of you, plunge his cock deeper inside your hot, wet cunt. 

kaeya pushes up onto his knees and props your ankles on his shoulders, still fucking you through it all without missing a beat.

“oh gods, kae- kaeya~...feels so good, don’t stop!”

“wasn’t planning on it…” he pants as he leans forward, putting you in a deep press so he can hit the spot that makes your hips leave the bed. “...gonna fuck you until this sweet pussy of yours creams all over my dick…”

you’re twisting the sheets in your fists above your head, the firm ridge of kaeya’s cockhead bumping against your sweet spot with every snap of his hips. strands of blue hair are sticking to his tan skin, a bead of sweat trickles down his chest before dripping onto yours. his palms are planted firmly on either side of you, veins popping out along his sinewy arms as muffled grunts form in his throat.

your walls are closing in tighter around him, both of you can feel it. his name is leaving your lips in broken syllables, coming out in huffs with the force of his thrusts: “kae-ya…y-you…fuck…g-gon-na…” is all you can manage before he fucks your next orgasm right out of you. you’re pawing at his chest, crying his name, clenching so hard around him you’d push him out were it not for him pounding into you harder, fighting to stay inside, determined to fuck you all the way through it with his brow furrowed and jaw clenched.

his balls ache, but he’s able to hold out for a few more seconds before the coil snaps inside him. he swears and pulls out quickly, his narrow hips still jerking and his arm flexing as he spills his hot, sticky seed out onto your belly and tits. you watch the pleasure wash over his beautiful face as his cock twitches in his own hand, a groan giving way to a satisfied sigh as the last of his cum oozes from his slit.

one at a time, he lowers your feet to the bed on either side of him. both of you are out of breath, chests heaving as kaeya dips down and licks a glob of his still-warm semen from your skin before bringing his mouth to yours. you moan in his mouth at his flavor, eagerly swirling your tongue around his to let him feed you his fresh, salty cum. 

when he rolls off of you, both of you just lie on your backs in comfortable silence for a few moments, catching your breaths and basking in the afterglow. 

“i guess this means you’ll be leaving soon, hm?” you finally ask. 

with one knee bent, kaeya turns his head to look at you as you gaze up at the ceiling. “is that your way of kicking me out of your bed?” he asks with a forced smirk. 

“no,” you chuckle. “i just didn’t take you for the type to stick around after a one-night stand…” you turn onto your side to face him. “but if i’m being honest, i really don’t want you to leave.”

“just how big of a whore do you think i am?” kaeya asks, contriving to sound offended and making you chuckle. he mirrors you and rolls onto his side, tenderly tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “i’m glad you want me to stay. i’ve had more fun with you tonight than i’ve had in a really long time.”

“is that right?” you say, biting your lip and dragging a fingertip down his enticing cleavage. “then why should our fun end?” you lean in and kiss him, his lips meeting yours softly.

“i didn’t say it should...” kaeya says before pressing his lips to yours again.

you press your hand against his chest, prompting him to lay on his back. goosebumps rise to meet your lips when you kiss his tan neck. he leans his head back and gasps quietly when you gently palm his softened cock. your touch is exquisite. he wants more of you but first he’s content to enjoy the wet kisses you leave along his skin as you work your way down to one of his dark and tightly budded nipples.

you smile and look up at him when he moans your name at the feeling of your tongue flicking over what’s proving to be one of his most sensitive spots. continuing on down, you take your time ghosting sweet kisses along the valley of his taut abs, all the way down to his cute navel and blue happy trail. you’re appreciating the time and care he obviously puts into his manscaping when you wrap your fingers around his still-sticky cock, surprised to find it so hard again already. 

with a couple of fingers holding his base, you swirl your tongue around his salty cockhead and fuck he tastes good. you close your lips around his tip and give it a little suckle before popping off again to kiss the underside of his rigid shaft. you can still taste yourself on him too, somehow making you want to suck him even more. 

sliding his slender fingers into your hair, kaeya mutters, “y/n…please…”

you finally take him in your mouth, your saliva coating him as you slowly sink down until his tip touches the back of your throat before hollowing your cheeks and pulling back towards his tip. with a slight tremble of his open legs, kaeya’s fingers tighten in your hair - not to control your pace or depth, but because the sheer pleasure coursing through him has all of his muscles tightening. 

“ahh~ feels so…nnh~” he sighs as you take him in again, “...good.”

the sounds and words leaving his mouth are going straight to your pussy. you want to know just how good you can make him feel so after a little more cocksucking, you pull off him and move to straddle his hips.

you and kaeya hold eye contact as you line him up with your slit, dragging his tip between your pussy lips a few times. you’ll never forget the pleading look in his eye or the way his lips part when his blunt, leaking tip catches on your opening and you begin to lower yourself on his length. kaeya takes your hands in his, intertwining your fingers as your eyes flutter shut at the sensation of being filled once again with his girth.

you lean down to kiss him as you begin to ride him, slowly at first but gradually working yourself into a frenzy. kaeya’s hands grip your hips as you pop your ass on him, gliding along his filling cock. your moans turn to whimpers as you feel yourself approaching another orgasm and you start bucking your hips. 

“ka-hahh~ kaeya…” you sit up, your hands anchoring themselves to his chest, using his body as leverage to drag your clit along his happy trail. 

kaeya’s fingertips are digging into the plush of your butt, aiding your thrusts as he whispers words of encouragement. “that’s it, y/n. you’re doing so well…fucking me right…you’re almost there, keep going~”

and just like that, your fingertips dig into the muscle of his chest as your orgasm rips through you. you’re crying his name out over and over as you spasm all around him and the very fibers of your being feel like they’re being torn asunder until your body begins to go limp. kaeya welcomes you into his embrace as you lower your chest to his, your hot breath bathing his neck as you try to catch it, still whining here and there as he kisses the side of your head and tells you how fucking amazing you are.

with some of your strength and mind returning, you rise just enough to kiss him again, finding a fleeting look of sheer adoration in his eye before he lifts your hips and pulls out of you, his rock hard, creamy cock slapping against his happy trail. he moves you onto your belly while he positions himself behind you, pulling your weak hips up until you’re presenting for him.

“is this okay?” he mutters, dragging his tip along your quivering slit.

eyes still closed, you nod weakly against the bed. “ye-yes…please, kaeya~”

with one hand on your lower back, he guides his cock inside you before hooking both his hands around your hips. he fucks you slowly, pulling almost all the way out before sinking himself fully inside your heat again. but it isn’t long before kaeya’s wet hips are slapping against your ass and he’s watching the creamy ring you’re leaving on his cock, mesmerized by how beautifully it contrasts with his darker skin. the thick vein on top of his cock is rolling under the pressure of your tight, sucking cunt - every time kaeya thrusts inside you. 

you’re whimpering again. “s-sir kaeyaaa~” you whine at him over your shoulder. 

“love it when you call me that…” he pants.

“i- hahh~ i know~” you say with a sly, exhausted smile. 

his balls are tightening again - rolling around in his sac as the muscles around them seek to force his seed out again, making him moan and exhale a long “ah, fuuuuuck~” behind you. “gonna cum…”

after a few more stuttered thrusts, kaeya buries himself deep inside you, his tightened balls pressed hard against your clit as he unloads himself. “i’m...nggh...i'm cumming~” he can’t help but moan loudly as he coats your walls with his hot, milky seed. a couple of thick globs leak from the rim of your hole, and drip down his tight, dark-skinned balls.

kaeya nearly collapses on top of you, but manages to land on the bed beside you, pulling you close to him. you’re facing each other but your eyes are still closed as you both kiss whatever part of the other’s body or face is closest, too exhausted to mutter a single word. 

⊹✧˚｡⋆

dawn comes, bringing with it her harsh light. your eyes flutter open with a squint, turning away from it only to find an arm lying limply around you. 

oh. oh right. that happened. 

you smile weakly at the fresh memories of your drunken fuckfest with the cavalry captain of the knights of favonius.

the fact that your duties in mondstadt have been fulfilled and you’ll be leaving to return to your homeland give you a low, sinking feeling in your heart. after a few minutes of replaying the events of the previous night and considering your options, you gingerly move the cavalry captain’s arm off your body - slowly and carefully so as not to wake him. 

⊹✧˚｡⋆

kaeya wakes with a groan, his eye blinking open to find himself alone in the hotel bed. he sits up and looks around, calling your name once but to no avail. he thinks ‘how predictable’ when he realizes you left without even saying goodbye. he tries to ignore the ache in his chest, reminding himself that he should be used to it by now. he throws the covers back to start getting dressed when from the corner of his eye he catches something flutter: a folded piece of parchment that had been resting on your pillow. a thread of hope dares to weave its way through his heart as he picks it up and begins to read:

“you looked so handsome and peaceful in the morning light, i didn’t want to wake you. thank you…for everything, but especially for the night before. i don’t want to call it “last” night because i truly hope it wasn’t our last. please reach out if you feel the same. i’d love for you to visit my homeland so i can be your tour guide and return the favor…i’d love to see you again, sir kaeya alberich…”

you’d signed it with your name and a simple, small heart before writing your address below your signature.

a couple of days later, you receive a letter inside an envelope with the seal of the knights of favonius. 

“of course i feel the same. our time together was far too delightful to have been so brief. i would love to visit you and experience all that your homeland has to offer. the acting grand master has been urging me to take some time off to relax anyway. so just tell me when and i’ll be there with bells on. we’ll paint the town red and enjoy as many more nights together as you please, my lady.”

— sir kaeya

kaeya m.list | main m.list

⊹✧˚｡⋆ 18+ reblogs, likes, comments, and follows always appreciated !! i give you all kithkith !!

[lgbtpopcult]

A note from the editors...

On First Kill and What it Says About Netflix, Media and the Undo Burden Queer Women Have to Carry

I have no criticisms for First Kill. The people who worked on it did their best with the limited budget and experience they had. Even with its flaws the concept was good and the story of the two girls alone managed to get more viewership than many Netflix series that are constantly renewed.

I will however talk about Netflix. I have been very vocal of my criticism of Netflix in the past but always put that aside so we can promote wlw media on this blog wherever they came from. But it was always blatant how the idea of queer women leads is viewed on the platform.

Netflix initially launched into mainstream culture in great part due to offering diverse shows like Orange is the new Black (a show specifically diverse in terms of women's sexuality, with queer women leads). Shows that were considered alternative and progressive compared to Network TV. After succeeding in gaining popularity because they offered the thing others didn't, Netflix content shifted. Even though investing in creating a quality show with a wlw main couple had paid off in the past they decided being more like network TV was the best strategy. Any attempt at inclusion for queer women was either carefully veiled behind projects that "are not really about the gay girls, the gay girls are just there" like The Prom, promoted without a hint of the lgbt content like Everything Sucks and Teenage Bounty Hunters or not promoted at all like Feria The Darkest Light, The Half of It and I'm Not Ok With This. They were generally given very little room to succeed. Most of the wlw focused projects were never promoted, had unknown actors and given a small budget.

If the project was big, well promoted and expensive it meant the screentime of the queer woman was limited. Even Warrior Nun (based on very gay source material) and Babysitter's Club (with everyone thinking the lead has to be queer) simply gave a side character 2 minutes to be out as a gay girl and called it a day. If they're investing big you can count on the gay woman part to be small. This came to a head when they changed the lead's sexuality in Archive 81 (who was a lesbian with a wife in the original podcast) and made her wife her gay roommate. "And they were roommates!". It was in some ways laughable to what lengths they'd go to because of their need to limit queer women to side characters in big projects they're actually invested in.

But First Kill was a series putting the wlw couple front and center so we had to believe all of the above was a coincidence right? We gave them another chance and they proved everything we had been seeing was right. They set it up to fail and when it didn't they justified the cancellation by saying it didn't succeed enough. That's the thing. It would have succeeded enough if they hadn't set it up to fail so blatantly.

Netflix will rain unbelievable amounts of money to get the biggest names from the TikTok, acting and music worlds to star in their big budget straight cheesy romances. They gave First Kill 10 dollars and candy to paraphrase a person who worked on the show. They were unwilling to pay for the really good, experienced writing team needed to turn a vampire romance story into a well fleshed out TV show. As a result the writing was acceptable for a vampire romance novel but not for live action TV dialogue. They were unwilling to pay for good cgi. As a result the cgi made CW shows look good in comparison. They were unwilling to pay for expensive, popular actors. They were unwilling to pay for any sort of production value. Why? Because they don't have enough faith in projects about queer women to invest in them. But the wlw shows have to succeed anyway or else we confirm their aversion to invest in our projects was right. We are asked and creators are asked to make a hit out of something without given the proper tools and then told we don't sell.

That is our vicious circle with Netflix even if it's proven that when money and work is put in to a project that centers wlw, people will come. Even if millions are lost on failed projects that center straight ppl. Even in a world where Gen Z is set to rule the world and it's a generation that is more and more queer.

Queer women are expected to consume projects that are lesser than those of straight ppl and even those of gay men. Unfortunately, we live in that messed up intersection of misogyny and homophobia that makes investing in us somehow the last risk to take. As they liberally throw money away on worthless trash. But it's straight trash so...

Good news is Network TV is dying. Netflix imitating their focus on a default basic straight audience (and the white gay pretty boys they can fetishize) does not seem like a good strategy for the future. Other services that are putting real effort into bringing queer women out of the TV margins will become the entertainment providers of the most sexually diverse generation of women we've ever had. Let's bring about that future as soon as possible. Go watch Paper Girls, Yellowjackets, Harley Quinn animated series, Dickinson, Crush... If you're a woman, or non-binary person, and not straight, fuck Netflix. Cancel your Netflix account.

Do fear for The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Expect as little from Netflix as possible. That's what they're willing to give you.

Twitter said it best:

[sidthedollface2]

Third Love

Ch: 3 El Boracho

Pairing: Eddie x Mexican Female Reader

Word Count: 4.3k

Summary: Eddie tries to win over your affection and use you in hopes of getting signed to your dads record company. There's just one problem. Your situationship and a heartbreaking past that threatens to expose the darker side of you.

CW: MDNI 18+ flashbacks, mental illness, smut (fingering, bjs) Modern au Eddie, fuckboy Eddie. Spanish words. Reader with other man (not cheating). Eddie with other girl, gave you a cute lil nickname cuz youre a sweetie. 🍑

Finding a day that both you and Eddie were free turned out to be harder than you thought. He still managed to send you text messages. His sweet Good Morning message brought a smile to your face and his play by play of how his day was going made you feel like you two knew each other more than a weekend.

Your schedule was already tight with zoom meetings and studio time. A particular Rapper had a falling out with the label, stating creative differences and unprofessionalism by the label. In other words the Artist was defying the requests to create a radio friendly track while also claiming his royalties weren't reflecting the millions he was bringing the company. Word Had gotten around that this Artist was money hungry and ungrateful for the success he had attained in such a short time. Everywhere you looked and social media was stretching the truth, and cancel culture was not giving up on him.

"Dad, you can't take him off the label. Austin can blend into multiple genres, right now the rap world thinks he's a clown. But If i can convince him to cut his hair and do this Nirvana cover set the rock world will embrace him with open arms."

A sigh leaves your dads lips as he looks out from the 13th floor of his office. Tall glass windows brighten the room, L.A. traffic and high rise towers surround the building. You sit on one of the many couches where contracts are signed, and famous musicians cheer to their success. Gold and platinum albums cover the walls, a photo of your parents sits on your dads large mahogany desk. Soon this would be your office and you wonder what photos would make it to your desk. A best friend maybe, or perhaps a lover, possibly both.

"This whole Company is going to be your responsibility soon. If you think Austin can turn this around without getting canceled then do what you have to do. But if it fails then the possibility of more failed artists will run this place to the ground, and that'll be on your shoulders."

You thank your dad for trusting you to deal with Austin and assure him you'll be home to cook him his favorite meal, just like how your mom did. You're half way out of his office when his following question has you stopping in your tracks.

"Mija wait. Have you told Sebastian about the contract?"

Almost all the talent you were seeing thought that your Dad was the only person to offer them a contract when in reality it was you. Your dad handled the office work and mostly stayed behind the scenes where lawyers and financial advisers were involved.

You knew first hand how the singers or bands commanded a crowd. How talented or how much work needed to be done to get them to a level where they'd bring a profit to the company. As a band Glass House wasn't ready yet. Sebastian as a front man was incredibly talented. You just didn't have the heart to tell him that his friends were keeping him back.

"They're not ready yet." You replied, closing the door behind you. As you reach the elevator doors and press the G button for the garage, you quickly send Austin a message. "You owe me big time."

~~~~~~~~~

After finding out that Max was your roommate Eddie had asked if she would meet him for coffee to talk about how her trip with Lucas went. Not to get some personal information about you. Nope. That wasn't like him, he would never betray your trust that way. Or would he?

The delicious scent of coffee grounds and vanilla filled the crowded shop. People in business attire stood at the order pick up line, glancing at the names of drinks that had been served. Eddie's tight black jeans and cut off sleeves of his shirt was a stark contrast to the suits and ties that were gathered as he walked up to grab his drinks.

"Since when do you get cold brews Red?" He asked, sliding her the vanilla cream cold brew she ordered. "Since my roommate made me try one of hers." She took a sip of her drink, humming in approval of its bitter but sweet taste. Coffee order, check. Eddie took a sip of his Americano, "You didn't tell me you had a roommate." He questioned. "She's hardly home because of work, and she spends the night with her boyfri–" She cuts herself off and shakes her head. "Sorry, not boyfriend. Actually, that reminds me Lucas wanted me to give you some nerd D&D stuff. Left it at the apartment though."

It was wrong and he knew it. He followed Max to her apartment, knowing it was also your apartment. Hesitancy written all over his face as he walked into your safe space. Bright light filtered through large windows. Planters and hanging pots decorated the space. A money tree with three thick roots spiraled together giving home to large green leaves sat in the corner by another window. He knew Max didn't care for plants so this love of greenery must be yours. He walked over to the bookcase in the living room, it was large and filled to the brim. "These are all yours?" He asked as Max sauntered to the kitchen in search of some snacks. "Nope. All roomies." She replied.

Eddie slowly glanced at the titles, tracing his finger along the spines. He plucked one from the shelf and smiled to himself, A Game of Thrones, book one to a series of 7. You liked fantasy, he thought as he placed the book back in place. "Have a seat. I gotta look for the damn manual in all my junk." Max explained, throwing Eddie a smuckers peanut butter jelly sandwich. "Yeah yeah take your time." He replied, secretly asking for more time to roam through your home. Eddie watches as Max bounces over to her room and he wonders which one was yours. He sat at the couch, eyes wandering every little corner, memorizing the small details of your apartment. For knowing Max as long as he did he knew all her likes and dislikes so it was easy for him to decipher her hobbies from yours. Gaming consoles filled the space under your TV, A Ps5, Xbox, Nintendo Switch, guess no PC games for you. On the wall behind the couch a painting caught his attention. A man Eddie assumed was a warrior, large orange feathers held in place by a thick gold band rested on his head. Armour draped over his shoulders and down the center of his chest leaving his torso and arms bare. Animal leather draped along his waist as a loincloth. Physique sculpted like a God. He carried a curvy woman in his arms, she wore a white dress and a flower in her hair, she was dead and this warrior carried her down a large mountain. At the bottom of the beautiful painting are the words Popocatépetl and Iztaccíhuatl, he couldn't even sound out the words but wrote them down in his phone to google later.

Eddie took steps toward the hallway, his heart beating faster than normal as he stood outside your room. His hand held onto the door knob to your bedroom, this was crossing a line. Invading your privacy like no one had ever done. The bed you slept in at night, that housed your nightmares, all your delicate clothes and personal belongings just on the other side of this door. Photos of your father and your beloved mother sit at your nightstand where you'd silently cry into your pillow begging to turn back the hands of time for one more minute with her. Detailed notes and revised contracts of future artists litter your desk, a calendar of all your past and future events hang on the wall above. Multiple medications fill the medicine cabinet of your bathroom, antidepressants, anxiety, pain pills and sleep aids to name a few. Medications that no one knew about except your father. Small beads of sweat gather around his hairline as he thought of entering without your knowledge. He tightened his grip on the door, his breath deepend causing his chest to visibly rise and fall. The thundering beat of his heart heard loud through his ears, blocking out the good vs bad thoughts if he were to enter your room. If Eddie entered your room, all your deepest secrets and pain would be delivered to him on a silver platter. Your Mothers passing, your Fathers business, your brother's trip to your family's homeland, the mere fact that you had a brother. The real reason Sebastian was involved so much in your life, all details about you lay just beyond the door.

A shaky breath escaped from his lips as Eddie released the door. He did want to get to know you, just not like this. Not veiled in deceit and lies.

"Bathrooms over here."

Eddie jumped at the sound of Max's voice just behind him.

"Dammit Red, scared the shit outta me." He chuckled, clutching his chest in surprise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You didn't get home till almost 11pm, dragging your feet up the steps of your apartment. The comfort of your bed softly calls you towards it. The soft glow of the living room brought your mind some sense of peace, you were finally home. You shuffled to your door, eyes drowsy with sleep. Searching for the key to your room, the sound of metal grinding the tile floor was heard as you looked down to your feet, a shiny chain peeked from beneath your shoe. You leaned down and cradled it in your hand, a silver chain with a red and black Fender pick hung from its length. On one side the initials EM delicately carved the surface, and CC on the other. Too exhausted to think much of it, you pocketed it in your jacket and turned in for the night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie had called you everyday leading up to your date night. The conversations were usually quick, a hurried 'have a good day' and a 'don't forget your lunch.' It was sort of domestic you thought, but you welcomed it as it made you feel cared for. Tonight Eddie had asked if it was ok to facetime you, which you nervously accepted.

You sat in the living room of your Dads house, when your phone rang the screen came to life as the name 'Eddie' was displayed. You answered with a shy "hello" as Eddie's beautiful face filled your phone screen. His long dark curls framed his pale face and his wide smile brought a tiny flush to your cheeks. "Hey, Princess Peach" he greeted. His deep voice rattled your nerves and the sweet pet name had you smiling into your phone. How was he able to pull a smile from just a greeting you had no idea. Eddie's eyes roamed over your shoulder and you informed him that you were at your Dads house. "I've never seen a house so huge, Quick tour perhaps?"

"Oh, yeah of course." You agreed, getting up from the couch and walking up the stairs. You gave him a glimpse of the foyer from the top of the stairs and Eddie gasped. White marbled floors and a wrought iron staircase circled both sides of the room, in the center a white grand piano gave the entryway a luxurious look. Eddie swallowed, and he all of a sudden realized that you were way above his social status. Your Dad must be a Billionaire if not then for sure a Millionaire. Not even Steve's house, the wealthiest person he knew had a foyer. Shaking the uncertainty from his face he focused on the piano. "You play piano? Or any instrument?." He asked, genuinely curious. You threw your head back and your boisterous laugh echoed in the room. "I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you. It's just. I was a producer before, and yeah, I can play many instruments." Eddie beamed at the knowledge. You continued down the hall and motioned to a bedroom. "This is my room." You continued walking, not bothering to open the door. "Whoa whoa, I don't get to see where the magic happens?" He chuckled, raising his eyebrows suggestively. You smiled at your phone and bit into your bottom lip. "Maybe after our date, but only if you're a good boy." Eddie's eyes widened at your flirtatious gesture, and he hoped to God you meant it.

"Don't tease me with a good time sweetheart cuz I'll hold you to it."

He smirked and your stomach knotted as he licked his lips.

You dip your chin towards your shoulder and cover your smile with your hand. "Don't get shy on me now baby, I wanna see that pretty smile." He cooed.

When the word Baby left his lips you knew you were in trouble. He looked so pretty even through the screen, prettier than you remembered. The sparkle in his warm eyes, and the crinkles when he smiled made your heart beat a little faster. You talked for hours about everything and anything. From your favorite childhood movies to Game of Thrones, which he mentioned was an amazing show. Your favorite foods which brought you to cook dinner while the phone sat in the corner. His curious eyes watching you carefully cut into various vegetables and beef, all the ingredients needed to make the caldo as you explained to him. Eddie's lips parted as you brought a spoonful of soup to your mouth, gently puckering your lips to blow at the steam that swirled from the hot liquid. He didn't know if his mouth watered at the delicious meal you made or the image of your lashes fluttering closed as your glistening lips wrapped around his–

"Mmmmm, so good." You hummed, interrupting his dirty thoughts.

"Yeah? That actually looks tasty, can't wait to try some." He hinted. Hoping to be a taste tester for any and all cuisine made by your skilled hands.

"Did your Mom show you how to cook?" He asked.

Time stood still. Your eyes focused on nothing as your mind went back to all the times you leaned over your moms shoulder eyeballing spices, and dancing to Vicente Fernandez as she swayed her hips belting out gritos that sounded like a cat dying. You and your brother's coughing fits paired with faux asphyxiation whenever she'd roast chili peppers on the stove. The thoughtful way she'd buy extra hominy for the menudo during holidays because she knew it was your favorite part.

"Peach?"

You blink back to the present as you wipe at a stray tear that escaped your lash line. "Um, yeah. She taught me how to cook." You utter, not trusting the wobble in your voice.

"That's really sweet of her, passing down those family traditions. I don't know how to cook much but I do love to eat." He says, rubbing his hand over his tummy. Eddie carries the conversation effortlessly, not one moment of silence between you. You learn that he's incredibly charming, laughs at almost everything, therefore making you laugh. He's fond of squishmellows and has to stop to look at every one he sees and do a squish test. He's not once brought up anything involving music or the usual, which celebrities are rude and is so and so really that obnoxious or is it an act, something that you're incredibly grateful for.

You're curled up on the couch, phone propped by the throw blanket bunched up over your tummy. Eddie is sprawled out on his bed, chucking pretzels in the air and catching them in his mouth. "That's five in a row." You yawn, eyes heavy with sleep.

"I should let you get some sleep sweetheart, It's late." He coos.

"Can you stay on the line with me? Please?"

"Of course I can Baby."

The sleepiness in your voice gives him a glimpse of what it would be like to sleep next to you. When you finally fall under the spell of the midnight sky, where the only light is bouncing off the glow from your phone, Eddie thinks you're just as beautiful sleeping as you are awake. He falls asleep staring at your cute nose and plush lips, wishing he was there to kiss you goodnight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"We're Corroded Coffin, Thank You and enjoy the rest of your night."

Eddie jumped off stage, buzzing with adrenaline and booze as he walks straight to two girls who had flashed him during their set. He walks between them, one arm over their shoulders as he orders enough drinks from the bar to regret it in the morning. Their hands roam the expanse of his body, fingers twirled around his tousled curly hair as they whisper and giggle in his ear. You arrive at the same bar, Max had invited you to see her friend's band play, not for work she mentioned, just to hang out and have fun. It also happens that Sebastian's friends are also on the roster tonight, which is why he walks in beside you, palm at the small of your back leading you to the bar for drinks. While Sebastian orders the drinks you leave his side in search of a restroom. The bartender motions backstage behind these two doors.

You stumble into a room that was rarely occupied. Deep grunts barely audible through the loud blaring music. The bartender at the front mentioned that it was behind these doors so you pushed through and you gasp, body frigid as the scene before you.

"Oh fuck, just like that sweetheart."

Eddie has a strawberry blonde on her knees between his thighs, hard cock shoved half way down her throat, a topless bleach blonde at his side licking into his mouth while his fingers pump into her dripping sex. "Get the fuck out." He seethes, not once looking towards the door.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." You spoke as you quickly turned away to scurry out of the room. Eddie's head snapped towards your paniced voice quick enough to see half of your face, and his stomach dropped. "Wait, Wait! it's not… fuck!" Eddie's voice strained as he pushes the girl off his cock. Shoving his dick back in his jeans to chase after you. You were able to make it back to the bar, leaving the restroom for a later time.

Eddie frantically searched for you in the crowded room, cursing himself in the process. He hadn't even take you out on a date yet and he was already fucking up. Afraid you had run out of the bar, he grabbed the nearest stool, stood on it and scanned the room till he found your beautiful face smiling with a group of your friends. He weaves through the crowd desperate to get to you, his rough hand reaching for your elbow. He leans in close to your ear so his words are not mistaken. "Can I please talk to you?" You crane your neck over your shoulder to meet Eddie's pleading eyes. A fake smile on display as you agree.

You follow Eddie outside, stepping into the cold night air. A shiver runs through your body as you stand under the glow of a lamp post. Eddie trails his eyes over the curves of your body. His eyes walk up your smooth bare legs, that he wishes he could touch. The black short shorts accentuate the curve of your hips and plush ass. His lips sting with the urge to kiss the curve of your waist, as his gaze ghosts over your exposed midriff. Eddie swallows as he now realizes your top is see through and your breasts sit perky in your black bra. You cross your arms over your chest, suddenly feeling too naked under his stare. His eyes finally meet yours and he's left speechless at the sight of you. The girls he was with don't even compare to your beauty, yet he agreed to indulge them 1 day before your date was supposed to happen.

"I'm sorry you –. They're not –." A sigh left his lips as his palm roughly dragged across his face.

"They're just a hook-up, nothing serious. I'm so fucken sorry."

"It's ok." You shrug, arms crossed over your midsection for warmth. He takes notice of your shivers and places his leather jacket over your shoulders.

"It's ok?" He repeats your words, brows pinches in confusion. Every girl that Eddie knew would be screaming at him with angry mascara streaks running down their hot cheeks, livid in jealousy. Some would claw and scratch at him begging why they weren't good enough, hitting him and calling him every ugly name in the book. But not you.

You stood tall, seemingly unbothered by what you had seen. Eddie stepped forward expecting you to step back. You stay planted, cautious eyes set on his guilty ones. He would prefer retaliation because the words you would speak would pain him more than a few scratches.

"You're not my boyfriend Eddie, and you're a Rockstar; they're all the same."

You look down at Eddie's hands. His fingers are twitching with the undeniable urge to touch you. The sound of the bar doors open and a tall figure steps out.

"There you are Kitten, I've been looking for you."

Eddie's Jaw clenches at the pet name, and he shakes his head in disbelief. How could he be green with jealousy if not even 20 minutes ago his cock was down another girl's throat.

Sebastian laces his fingers with yours and brings your hand up to his lips for a gentle peck to the back of your hand. You smile at his tenderness, and brush your shoulder against his chest. Eddie rolls his eyes, shooting daggers at his competition. He notices the need in Sebastian's stare, he glimmers with fondness and longing to be something more.

"Who the fuck is she?!" A screeching voice could be heard in the distance, and Eddie tightly closed his eyes, wishing the ground would swallow him up. This was not happening. He was fucking it all up before it even started. Cursing under his breath at the cards that were being played for him. A glance over Eddie's shoulder and you see Strawberry girl storming towards you.

Before she can reach you Eddie stands between you, hands gripping her arms, blocking her from attacking you. Sebastian pulls you behind him and it makes Eddie's stomach churn. It should be him shielding you from this groupie but instead it's his fault shes speaking to you. You try shoving Sebastian away attempting to confront the girl but his tall frame is immovable.

"Stop, just stop Chrissy." Eddie winces at the name. Surely a slip of the tongue. A loud crack is heard, as Strawberry girl's hand meets the side of Eddie's cheek. "It's kristie asshole!!" She yells, storming back into the bar, wobbly legs threatening to fold under her. Eddie's relieved to get rid of her and as he looks back to search for you he comes face to face with Sebastian's hard glare.

"Stay away from her." He orders, as he shoves Eddie's jacket to his chest.

Sebastian jogs back catching up to you, placing his hand on the small of your back guiding you to his car. You wrap your arm around his waist and Sebastian pulls you in a side hug.

Eddie watches at a distance as you both enter the car, Sebastian is seen waving his arms and hands around seemingly in a heated discussion. Eddies about to walk over to you when he sees Sebastian grip the back of your neck as he brings your lips to his in a deep kiss. Eddie has no right to be upset but seeing this man touch you and kiss you has him seeing red. Eddie knew he fucked up but he was determined to make it up to you. Just as Eddie turns his back away, you push at Sebastians chest and when his lips try to chase yours you turn away giving him your cheek instead.

Eddie finds himself back at the bar, drowning in whiskey and coke wondering if you'll find yourself in Sebastians bed. The thought alone churns his stomach, but he has no one to blame but himself. After his 4th drink, liquid courage raced through his veins and therefore the beginning of his drunk text messages.

Eddie: You never tolf me if Sebastan was your boyfriend

Eddie: he actz lik e your boyffiend

Eddie: is he youre fuckimg boyfriend!!

Eddie was right, you did end up in Sebastians bed that night. His warm body curled up behind you, anxious hands caressing and kneading your thighs, fingers gripped your hips pulling you close to rub against his clothed erection. He kissed your bare shoulder, gently moving your hair to the side to place wet kisses along your neck, inhaling the scent of your shampoo that lingered in your hair. The bright glow of your phone stopped him from going further. Skinny fingers punched in your password as your soft breathes deepend, indicating you were now fully asleep. Sebastian looked over the messages Eddie sent you and sadness consumed him. He didn't understand why you couldnt reciprocate his adoration for you. To him you were it, his end goal and the woman of his dreams. He never once looked at other girls, despite having groupies throw themselves at him. He never looked for other relationships even though you clearly made yourself available to other men, sure you two weren't official but he still stayed loyal to you. He told you many times that he would never let you go, he'd wait for you for as long as it took. He types out a message and sends it to Eddie hoping it would steer him away from you.

You: He's not my boyfriend yet, but we do fuck.

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Taglist:

@amira0303 @hideoutside @edsforehead @skank-sinatra13 @kissmejoey @ms1oftheboys

[film-flick]

BEST 10 HORROR MOVIES OF 2023 (SO FAR) ACCORDING TO ROTTEN TOMATOES

1. HUESERA: THE BONE WOMAN

Valeria's joy at becoming a first-time mother is quickly taken away when she's cursed by a sinister entity. As danger closes in, she's forced deeper into a chilling world of dark magic that threatens to consume her.

2. ATTACHMENT

ATTACHMENT is a horror romance about Maja, a has-been actress in Denmark, who falls in love with Leah, a young, Jewish academic visiting from the UK. When Leah suffers a mysterious seizure, Maja fears their whirlwind romance might be cut short and decides to follow Leah back to her home in London. There, Maja meets her new downstairs neighbour: Leah’s mother, Chana. An overbearing, seemingly religious and highly secretive woman, Chana seems resistant to all of Maja’s attempts to win her over. And as Maja notices strange occurrences in the building, she begins to suspect that Chana’s secrets could be much darker than first anticipated.

3. TALK TO ME

When a group of friends discover how to conjure spirits using an embalmed hand, they become hooked on the new thrill, until one of them goes too far and unleashes terrifying supernatural forces.

4. M3GAN

M3GAN is a marvel of artificial intelligence, a life-like doll programmed to be a child's greatest companion and a parent's greatest ally. Designed by brilliant toy-company roboticist Gemma (Get Out's Allison Williams), M3GAN can listen and watch and learn as she becomes friend and teacher, playmate and protector, for the child she is bonded to. When Gemma suddenly becomes the caretaker of her orphaned 8-year-old niece, Cady (Violet McGraw, The Haunting of Hill House), Gemma's unsure and unprepared to be a parent. Under intense pressure at work, Gemma decides to pair her M3GAN prototype with Cady in an attempt to resolve both problems--a decision that will have unimaginable consequences.

5. INFLUENCER

INFLUENCER tells the story of Madison (Emily Tennant, "Riverdale"), a popular social media influencer who is having a lonely and uneventful trip in Thailand despite what she tells her followers on Instagram. While reflecting on her boyfriend canceling the trip, she meets CW (Cassandra Naud, "See"), a fearless and enigmatic traveler who offers to take her to some of the most Instagram-worthy locations. Together they share authentic meals and drinks with locals, discussing the differences between Madison's online presence and CW's lack of one. After showing Madison all of the amazing sights, things take a different turn when CW brings her to a surprise location -- a deserted island that is completely off the grid.

6. BROOKLYN 45

Friday, December 27, 1945. Five military veterans gather in the ornate parlor of a Brooklyn brownstone. Best friends since childhood, they've reunited to support their troubled host -- but when his invitation for cocktails turns into an impromptu séance, the metaphoric ghosts of their past become all-too-literal. Trapped in their host's lounge, the Greatest Generation now finds themselves put to one final test... with their only route to freedom being more bloodshed.

7. TOTALLY KILLER

Thirty-five years after the shocking murder of three teens, the infamous "Sweet Sixteen Killer" returns on Halloween night to claim a fourth victim. Seventeen-year-old Jamie (Kiernan Shipka) ignores her overprotective mom's (Julie Bowen) warning and comes face-to-face with the masked maniac and, on the run for her life, accidentally time travels back to 1987, the year of the original killings. Forced to navigate the unfamiliar and outrageous culture of the 1980s, Jamie teams up with her teen mom (Olivia Holt) to take down the killer once and for all, before she's stuck in the past forever.

8. THE BLACKENING

The Blackening centers around a group of Black friends who reunite for a Juneteenth weekend getaway only to find themselves trapped in a remote cabin with a twisted killer. Forced to play by his rules, the friends soon realize this ain't no motherfu**in' game. Directed by Tim Story (Ride Along, Think Like A Man, Barbershop) and co-written by Tracy Oliver (Girls Trip, Harlem) and Dewayne Perkins (The Amber Ruffin Show, Brooklyn Nine-Nine), The Blackening skewers genre tropes and poses the sardonic question: if the entire cast of a horror movie is Black, who dies first?

9. SICK

As the pandemic steadily brings the world to a halt, Parker and her best friend Miri decide to quarantine at the family lake house alone--or so they think.

10. INFINITY POOL

While staying at an isolated island resort, James (Alexander Skarsgård) and Em (Cleopatra Coleman) are enjoying a perfect vacation of pristine beaches, exceptional staff, and soaking up the sun. But guided by the seductive and mysterious Gabi (Mia Goth), they venture outside the resort grounds and find themselves in a culture filled with violence, hedonism, and untold horror. A tragic accident leaves them facing a zero tolerance policy for crime: either you'll be executed, or, if you're rich enough to afford it, you can watch yourself die instead.

[rosesrotofficial]

i made a game (demo)!

What if Youtubers joined a death game?

hi there!

my name is Rose. i write about unhinged women, sapphic darkness, deconstructions and tragedy.

so, if any of those resonate, you'll like MORTAL COIL.

You're Ikuyo, an up-and-coming FPS gamer on the world's biggest video & streaming platform: Eidolon. Your sister Sonoko is the Eidolon goddess @flowerfall: loved by millions for her modelling, self-care, and genuine authenticity.

And she's just been cancelled.

Ikuyo struggles to reach her sister amid the storms of controversy, confused that Sonoko isn't acknowledging the drama that's raging on. Sonoko's only response? It's to join the 99th season of the televised death game, MORTAL COIL.

Frantic, afraid, and desperate: Ikuyo must choose whether to follow Sonoko into the depths of destruction, risking her life to save her sister who seems all too eager to play.

Will Sonoko slip away from Ikuyo's grasp? Or will their fates be far worse than that?

▼ A study in human psychology under digital fame. A critique involving the creators, the fans, and the algorithm, deconstructing YouTube, Twitch, and VTuber culture.

△ This demo includes "Part 1: Prologue" and "Part 2: Entrance", about Ikuyo and Sonoko's entrance to Mortal Coil. 

▼ Cyberpunk, Hong Kong, and VR themed.

△ 10k words, 30m-1 hr of playtime. Free to play.

▼ CW: dark content, mental health issues.

△ Part of #MFGJ2023!

▼ This is the demo version. In the full version, the game will be choice-based as you guide Ikuyo through the death game, choosing who lives... and who dies. 

△ The full version will feature more LGBTQ+ and disabled characters, friendships/relationships, and queer romance options!

i made the demo for MORTAL COIL with my artist (@nitunioart) + programmer team for My First Game Jam: Summer 2023, and it was such a fantastic experience: i couldn't be happier with what we've done!

i hope you enjoy if you choose to play the game! i poured a lot of my heart into it, and i'm looking forward to hearing what you guys think about it, especially on what we could improve on. :)

thank you for reading! i hope you stick around to see what i'll do.

~ Rose.