#did these parents mourn? do they even know they have kids? would they want them back??

[foldingfittedsheets]

I’ve always been a pretty good liar. As an adult I’ve come to a moral place in which I don’t use that skill set unless it will explicitly benefit someone. But when I was a kid all bets were off.

I think tiny child me was doing their little autistic best but recognized that some situations would be best navigated by lying as telling the truth never netted positive results. Whether it was because my needs often went unmet or ignored, or because I didn’t see any reason not to lie if it would be more favorable, I’m not sure.

This is the story of my proudest lie. The best lie I ever did. A lie that looking back I still go, damn, I was eight.

Our story begins in second grade. I was eight. My school was having a book fair and I spent my small stipend on Gulliver’s Travels. No idea why. Lacking further funds I wandered the fair and came upon the greatest sight known to man. Frog erasers. They were so cute and I was extremely into animals of all kinds.

The whimsy. Who could have known they made erasers in such wonderful shapes? I mourned that I’d spent my money already, and played quietly with the little frogs in their bin. That’s when I was approached by a few other kids from my class.

I didn’t know most of them very well, but enough that it was civil when they asked me, “Are you going to buy those frogs?”

“I’d like to,” I admitted, “but I spent all my money.”

“Why don’t you steal them?”

“I thought about that, but I don’t have pockets.” Indeed, stealing had crossed my mind but it had been a brief temptation. I wasn’t even scandalized that the other girls suggested it.

“Caitlin has pockets,” the leader of the pack said. And indeed, Caitlin in her purple overalls did have pocket space for two frogs. So Caitlin and I became partners. My role in the escapade was just... wanting frogs and walking out with her. We stole two frogs, a yellow and a purple, and united by the misdeed we played together with them at recess despite not really being friendly prior.

After lunch I was called from class to the library. The principal herself was there waiting for me. She had a somber air, almost mournful that she needed to punish me. It was self evident to me that I was here for frog crimes. Caitlin had cracked and taken the fastest route to forgiveness- snitching on an accomplice. Despite the fact that my role was just: wanted frogs, I knew I was going to be in trouble.

Now, I could have told the truth. Pulled a Caitlin and ratted on the girl who told us to steal them. But clearly I’d still be in trouble for having gone along with the morally bereft plan. I was mad at Caitlin for telling but not enough to foist the onus back into her.

“Do you know why you’re here?” The principal asked kindly.

“Is it about the frogs?”

“Yes, Caitlin told us you stole the frogs.”

I quivered my lip and drew myself up indignantly. “I didn’t steal them!”

She blinked at my vehemence but since I looked near tears she carefully asked, “What happened?”

“I really wanted the frogs, but I didn’t have any money. So I asked the librarian if I could take them and bring the money tomorrow! But she was really busy and lots of people were talking to her, and she said yes! But maybe she was saying yes to someone else? And I thought it was to me but Caitlin didn’t, but I was going to bring money tomorrow!”

The principal. Was flummoxed. This was a situation in which I clearly thought I’d done no wrong, in which she couldn’t prove I had done anything wrong, and which the librarian would almost certainly not be able to weigh in. She regarded me not with suspicion but rather vaguely confused as to how to handle me.

I got off with a slight warning that I should pay for things before taking them, despite not having been the one to take things in the first place, and the frogs were confiscated.

I was vaguely worried they’d call my parents but years later when I admitted the story to my mom as an adult she laughed herself sick and said she’d never gotten a call.

[nadvs]

home before dark (part three)

pairing rafe cameron x kook! female reader

rating mature 18+

summary as children, you and rafe were best friends, but then tragedy suddenly struck his family and he shut everybody out. years later, you need his help when a pushy ex-boyfriend won’t leave you alone. rafe is perfect for the job because everybody’s afraid of him. except for you.

content warnings stalker ex, violence, substance abuse, death and mourning of parent

» masterlist

· · ── ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ── · ·

Rafe is sitting in a chair in the front room of your home, his chin resting on his hand, hardly paying any attention to the sitcom playing on the tv screen.

He’s pissed off. Why did it have to storm tonight of all nights, when he doesn’t have anything to numb the pain, nothing to drown out the sound of the rain drumming on the windows?

In his haste, he didn’t pack any coke before coming here. He didn’t think he’d need it this bad.

And that photo he saw upstairs. It’s making everything so much fucking worse.

This is how the world repays him for helping someone. Figures. He’s used to having shit luck. Trying to make his own father love him has been a losing game, and he’s been at that for years, so why would anything else go his way?

“Hey.” Rafe straightens when he hears you. You look into the room. “Did the thunder wake you up, too?”

He hasn’t slept at all. But he nods.

There’s a blankness in his stare, the tv casting dull colors over his face. He didn’t bother to turn the light on.

You cross the room, hazy from your interrupted sleep, and settle on the couch. You’re far away from him, acting like you’ve never touched, even though you were just pressed against each other on his motorcycle.

You wonder if it felt nice to him, too. Or if you were just extra weight on his bike, an irritating responsibility he was cornered into taking on.

“Do you have any booze around here?” Rafe mutters. You catch the desolation in his tone.

“What’s wrong?” you ask.

You instantly feel ridiculous for expecting you won’t be met with the cold shoulder. You doubt he’ll answer. But then, because the world must be off its axis, he does.

“Fucking hate this weather,” he says.

His words make a chill sink into your bones. You remember your father telling you the news years ago after he got the phone call. A torrential downpour. The freeway. Zero visibility.

Anne lost control of her car.

By the look on your dad’s face, you knew what that meant. Rafe’s mother didn’t survive the wreck.

He doesn’t have to say it. You know that’s why he hates storms.

“I can distract you,” you offer, “if you want?”

It was something you did as kids. Rafe would be angry or sad or hurt or anything and you’d talk his ear off about whatever you could think of until the dark cloud hanging over him drifted away.

His feelings always felt too big for him. You were the best at making them small enough to manage.

Rafe is used to wanting to be left alone. But not right now. Not if he can be with you. Admitting it feels impossible. The wall he spent years building around himself is solid from both sides.

“It’s your house,” he finally says. “Do what you want.”

You take it an invitation to stay. You turn your attention to the tv, as if holding eye contact with him will make him take it back.

It gives him a chance to look at you. How the fuck have you not lost patience with him yet? Why do you still care?

“I keep wanting to ask why you’re helping me,” you say, just loud enough to be heard over the tv.

Rafe exhales sharply, rubbing his forehead.

“This is you distracting me,” he scoffs. “Aren’t you supposed to do the talking?”

The fact that he’s expecting you to replicate the days of your youth gives you a sliver of hope that maybe he misses them, too.

“There has to be a reason you’re doing it,” you murmur.

“Can’t you just be happy that I am?” he responds. A white flash of lighting pools into the room for a split second.

“No,” you say. Finally, he gives in.

“Because I…” he begins.

The noise from the show is adding to the frustrating confusion engulfing him. He angrily picks up the remote and turns the tv off, plunging both of you in darkness.

You turn your head towards him again, only able to make out the hard outline of his jaw.

“I always had to look out for you,” he says. “I guess I still do.”

You look down at your lap, taken aback that Rafe holds any sense of loyalty for you.

You almost want to remind him of what he said earlier, that you’re not kids anymore, but you don’t want to challenge him.

“And I don’t know why,” he adds, voice thin, “but you’re not a dick to me like everyone else is, so I kind of owe you.”

All you can hear is your own breathing and the ticking of the clock in the foyer and the tap of faltering raindrops. The storm is passing.

“It’s because you didn’t do anything wrong,” you say into the silence. “It’s not like you did something to make me hate you. You shut me out, but I get why.”

Your words reverberate through him. He wonders if you think that he hates you.

Still, you could have gone to any other guy and asked him to pretend to be your boyfriend.

“Why’d you come to me?” he asks.

“Because he’s scared of you.” You don’t have to nor do you want to say your ex’s name.

“And you’re not?”

“No.” You tilt your head. “We used to be best friends.”

You say it like he wouldn’t remember. He couldn’t erase it from his brain if he tried. And he has.

The heaviness of all this is suffocating to him. The past is done. There’s no point in digging up things that’ll just hurt him all over again.

He stands up, chasing out the familiarity that was slowly growing between you. But before he leaves the room, he pauses, pinching the bridge of his nose with trembling fingers.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, either, alright?” Rafe says into the dark, irritated, answering the question you asked him on the shoreline hours ago. “Not on purpose.”

As his shadow retreats, the words he left you with ring in your head. He doesn’t blame you. But you did do something wrong.

Rafe had his head buried into his pillow, throat burning from crying through his grief, every night for months.

As he lies in an unfamiliar bed all for a girl whose very existence makes him feel a multitude of good and bad all at once, he’s thrown back into those days, as if he’s a boy again.

His mother used to tell him it was a strength to be so sensitive, but her voice faded and his father’s voice got so much louder. What he tells him every time Rafe can’t swallow down the tears echoes in his mind. Toughen up. You’re fine.

But he’s not fine. He can’t stop crying and he knows he has to tell you he can’t do this anymore. Being with you brings back too much.

But the next morning, when Rafe finds you sitting at the kitchen island, wearing your pajamas and a smile, the prospect of ending this is tossed away.

You have access to him that nobody else does. You and that damn smile are a weakness that he didn’t know he had. And while he can act happy and careless around everyone else, he can’t put on an act for you. Ever.

“How’d you sleep?” you ask. Your hands are cupping a mug, your phone sitting beside it.

“Like shit,” Rafe replies, pacing to the fridge. “Took hours to fall asleep.”

You feel guilty that he didn’t have a good rest, considering he’s only here because you were too frightened to be alone.

“You?” he says after a beat. The ice must be melting if he’s actually asking about you for once.

“My sleep was good,” you reply. “It helped having you here.”

Rafe’s cheeks get warm. Someone actually wanting him around is a foreign feeling.

By the time your conversation was over last night, the rain and thunder had dwindled. It couldn’t have been the storm keeping him awake. Curiosity pushes you to figure it out.

“Was the bed uncomfortable?” you ask.

“No,” he answers. He finds a glass and fills it with water. His throat still hurts from crying last night.

You watch him, his presence commanding as he leans back against the counter opposite you. The dark, shallow bags beneath his eyes are illuminated in the bright lights above you. He looks exhausted.

“Was the room too warm? Or too cold?” you say.

“Can you relax?” Rafe huffs, his tone almost playful.

He isn’t about to admit that he can’t remember the last time he fell asleep sober. And he’s definitely not going to tell you that the last thing he thought about before finally passing out was that his cheeks burned from how hard he was wiping his tears away.

“The least I can do is make sure you’re comfortable since I made you stay the night,” you say.

His brows furrow as he takes a long gulp, tipping his head back.

“Nobody can make me do anything,” he replies once he downs the water. You know it’s the truth. It makes the fact that he’s doing this for you all the more meaningful.

Before you can respond, your phone buzzes loudly on the countertop. Rafe sees your face fall when your eyes drop to the screen. You read the notification for a moment, then sigh and shake your head.

“He emailed me,” you say incredulously. “I blocked him on everything and he emailed me.”

Rafe leans over to see if you’ll let him look for himself. You slide your phone towards him and he picks it up to read Ty’s message.

What you have with him isn’t real. We both know it. Let me prove that I can treat you how you deserve. Please. I’m sorry for everything. I love you.

A part of Rafe is concerned you’ll fall for it.

“What’re you gonna do?” he asks.

“Block him there, too,” you mutter. “He does this. He’s mean, then he pretends like he changed, then he’s mean again… It’s the same bullshit over and over.”

Rafe blocks him for you and places your phone on the counter. You bite the inside of your cheek as the dread you always feel when Ty contacts you floods your every sense.

The despair on your face makes Rafe’s stomach sink. The next time he sees Ty, he’s beating the shit out of him.

“He’ll stop, okay? I’ll make him,” he says.

You’re still skeptical. Rafe definitely scares him, but Ty called him a bullshit rebound last night. He wrote that what you have with Rafe isn’t real. You’re not fooling him. And you’re afraid he won’t leave you alone until he believes you’re actually in a new relationship now.

“Yeah.” You exhale slowly. “Doesn’t sound like he’s falling for this, though.” You motion between you and him.

Rafe has to take a moment to catch your meaning. Falling for this. Your pretend relationship. Right.

“I didn’t tell anyone it’s fake,” you say, afraid it somehow got out. “Did you?”

Rafe shakes his head no and puts his empty glass in the sink. He scratches the back of his neck and looks at you again.

“Do you want me to keep crashing here until your mom and dad get back?” he asks.

You hate that your mind goes there, but you wonder when the last time he said mom out loud was. You shake away the thought.

“Not if you can’t get any actual sleep,” you respond.

Rafe typically gets irritated when someone can’t make up their mind. He wants everything done quickly, so he doesn’t have to stop and think.

But this is you and even though you’re scared of sleeping on your own, you’re considering how staying here affects Rafe and it gives him a heavy feeling of shame. He spent years avoiding the only person who never abandoned him. The only person who still gives a shit.

“I’ll just leave my stuff here,” he says, making the decision for you.

“Thank you.” You mean it. The thought of someone being here with you is comforting.

As usual, Rafe ends the conversation quickly and abruptly, leaving the room. You soon hear the engine of his motorcycle rattling loudly from outside, the roar fading as he drives away.

You hoped that he’d at least want to hang out with you now. You don’t understand why you keep expecting more from him. It just hurts you every time.

You don’t hear from Ty for the rest of the day. You manage to run some errands without worrying you’ll see him because even when Rafe isn’t with you, you don’t feel as scared knowing he’s in your corner.

The days of the week mean practically nothing on the north side of the island over the summer. There’s a party almost every night, this time at a house just down the street from you.

You invite your friends to your place, drinking as you get ready, deciding to walk over to the party. You turn up already tipsy, finding yourself looking for Rafe even though you know you should only really be doing that if Ty is bothering you.

When you walk into the loud, crowded house, seeing you reminds Rafe of why he isn’t smoking or drinking or snorting anything tonight.

He’s had countless fights while wasted, but he wants to have a clear mind when he sees Ty. He needs to make the fucker pay and not give him a chance to get even one punch in.

You meet Rafe’s blue eyes every so often throughout the night, glad you’re finally able to have fun again because you know he’s keeping you safe.

The second Ty walks in, even though he hasn’t come close to approaching you, you make your way to Rafe.

You stand close to him, placing your hand in his, acting like a girlfriend to someone who is only doing this because he feels an overdue sense of loyalty to you.

Rafe stills for a moment before he laces his fingers with yours. His skin is hot, making your heart flutter in a way you know it shouldn’t.

“Hey,” you say over the music. His ring presses against your thumb.

“Hey,” he says tensely. He’s not used to affection, especially in front of people.

But this is what he signed up for. He needs to act like a boyfriend and he’s not going to fuck this up. It’s the first real responsibility he’s had that he actually gives a shit about.

His eyes land on Ty and his plan to confront him takes a backseat when he realizes he doesn’t want to let go of you. Right now, he’d rather have his hand in yours instead of using it to throw a punch. It’s like every touch you give him leaves a heavier impact than the last.

You immediately notice how tense Rafe is.

“Can you relax?” you joke, imitating the way he said it this morning. Your heart warms when his dimples appear, framing a smile he can’t stifle.

“I don’t sound like that,” he says.

“You sound exactly like that,” you reply with a laugh, picturing how tired he looked in your kitchen. “Please tell me you got some sleep today.”

Again, the concern you seem to have never lost for him appears.

“I did,” he says. He crashed in his bed the second he got home.

“How come it took you so long to fall asleep last night?”

Rafe’s knee-jerk reaction is to avoid the question. Especially if it’s you asking. But he can’t forget how shitty it felt when you brushed him off last night at the beach, so he pushes himself to answer.

“Just, uh…” He looks away. “Couldn’t turn off my brain.”

You gaze up at him. It almost aches, how badly you’d love to know what goes through his mind.

“When did this start?” one of his friends amusedly asks, pointing between you two. You notice Ty close by, his gaze sharp as he eavesdrops. Rafe notices him, too.

You squeeze Rafe’s hand tighter, clinging to him. He notices that his entire body buzzes when you do that.

“What, was I supposed to call you?” Rafe responds.

“I’m just saying,” his friend replies with a laugh, “it’s like all of a sudden, you got a girl out of nowhere.”

Alarm stings every inch of your skin when you notice Ty’s posture straighten in your peripheral.

“Don’t sound so surprised, asshole,” Rafe replies lightheartedly, gently pulling his hand out of your grasp to drape his heavy arm around your shoulders, pulling you flush against him.

You follow his lead, wrapping your arms around his torso. The relief from how well he played it off and the comfort you get from how he’s holding you is overwhelming.

Rafe dips his head to speak into your ear, his cheek brushing against yours, his cologne fresh.

“Think he’s falling for it now?” he mumbles, voice lowering an octave. With the way he’s holding you, you might fall for it yourself.

“Yeah,” you breathe. You squeeze him tighter, not for show, but because you want to. You’ve wanted to hug him since the funeral, when he was a boy with bloodshot eyes in a crumpled black suit, but he never let you get this close.

He brings his other hand up to your face, cradling your jaw, his thumb rubbing over your cheek. His touch is so tender that you have to remind yourself it’s Rafe doing this.

You’re suspended, bodies curved together, cheeks brushing, like you’re playing a game to see who’ll let go first.

“And he’s staying away from you, right?” His breath is warm against the shell of your ear.

You nod, at a loss for words.

“Is he watching?” he asks. You can see from the corner of your eye that your ex is staring right at you.

“Mhm,” you hum with a nod.

At this point, Rafe is being selfish. This is close enough. You wanted him to act like you’re a couple and he’s done it. He can pull away now. Maybe he should keep his arm around you for a little longer, but he doesn’t need to be this close.

Instead, he lowers to press his lips against your cheek and you hug him tighter, and fuck, it feels so good that he misses it before it’s even over.

He can’t believe that his body yearns to be this close to you. You opened up the floodgates the second you put your hand on him the first time a couple of nights ago. How good would it feel if you were doing it for real?

You lean into his kiss. His lips are so soft. You wish you could feel them against yours. It’s all to make everyone think you’re actually together. You keep telling yourself that.

When your arms around him weaken just a little, you feel something at his back, protruding against your forearm.

Your eyebrows draw together as you pull back only a few inches to meet Rafe’s eyes, your mind going to the worst possible scenario. Your breath catches. It’s a weapon.

“What is that?” you ask quietly, nudging against the hard item tucked into the band of his jeans.

“What do you think?”

“Rafe,” you say. His jaw tightens. The moment is gone. The wall is back up. Your tone teeters on a thin edge, like you’re judging him.

“You’re surprised the psycho owns a gun?” he scoffs.

He didn’t brush off what Ty said like you thought he did. It makes your stomach turn that your ex’s lie actually stuck with Rafe.

You glance over to see Ty’s back as he storms out of the room. Part of you is relieved, but right now, you mostly feel anxious that Rafe believes a lie.

“I never called you that,” you reiterate to him quietly. “I’ve never said anything bad about you. You think you can trust what he says?”

“I’m not planning on using it on him, okay?” Rafe snaps. “Unless he asks for it.”

He wishes you didn’t notice it. If you didn’t think he was fucked up before, you do now. He’s pissed off and embarrassed and disappointed all at once.

You’ve been trying to reconnect with him for so long. If he gives in, you’ll see that he’s not even close to who he was when you knew him. He’ll just let you down.

He realizes he hasn’t kept his distance only because you’re a painful reminder of a time he wants to forget. It’s also because he’s sure you wouldn’t like who he’s become. And he can’t take the rejection.

You’re still, unable to believe that he actually has a gun. That he would use it. That these are the lengths he’s going to to keep you safe.

You haven’t lost contact with him, but Rafe checks out of the moment and pulls his arm away.

“He’s gone now,” he mutters. You get the message. He’s done pretending. You drop your arms and find your friends again.

Hours later, the party is dwindling, but far from over. Rafe has been sober the entire time, making him all the more antsy and irritable.

He thought he’d beat the shit out of Ty tonight, but he’s exhausted and he can’t stop shaking. Why the hell is he shaking?

Rafe loses his patience and approaches you while you’re dancing with your friends.

“Let’s go,” he says, holding your hand. The contact makes your head spin all over again. Even though you’d like to stay, you comply.

You notice Ty’s eyes on you when you leave. He’s pretending to be a good guy again, keeping his distance, but you know it’s only a matter of time before he cracks.

Once you reach Rafe’s motorcycle in the cool night air, he hands you his helmet and you take it without hesitation.

After the short drive, you walk up the steps to your front door together. But you soon stop in your tracks, eyes wide as you stare at the ground.

Rafe follows your eye line. Mud’s been tracked onto the porch in fragmented footprints.

“I can’t… I can’t remember if that was there before,” you stammer. “Did you see it this morning?”

“I don’t know,” he responds. He rushed out of here too quickly to have noticed something like that.

You look around, as if you can find an answer in the darkness surrounding your home. You would have noticed it after you ran your errands earlier today. Probably. Maybe.

It could have been you. Or Rafe. Or one of your friends.

Or Ty. He didn’t arrive at the party until late into the night. Could he have been creeping around your house? Why would he?

Rafe glances up to confirm that there aren’t any cameras aiming at the door. It pisses him off when he notices there aren’t any cameras at all. He quickly catches on that your breathing has grown faster.

“Come on,” he says, gently pulling you by the crook of your elbow. “Let’s go inside. It’s nothing.”

He doesn’t believe his own words, but there’s no reason to scare you any further.

“What if he was here?” you say, letting Rafe pull you to the door. He takes the key out of your hand and pushes it into the lock.

“Then I’ll shoot him,” he mutters.

“That’s not funny.”

“I wasn’t joking.”

The door swings open, prompting the security system to start beeping.

You flip on the light and enter the code as he shuts the door behind you. You’re so frightened and unnerved that you jam one of the buttons with the wrong finger, prompting a harsh error noise from the system.

“Can you do this?” you huff. You tell Rafe the five-digit code and he quickly enters it, arming the system again. You notice his hand is trembling.

“Are you okay?” you ask. You know it’s not from fear. Rafe isn’t afraid of anything. He must be high on something. “What’d you take?”

“Nothing,” he says with a humorless laugh. It dawns on him that his body is reacting to the lack of coke in his system. “That’s the problem.”

“What?” you ask.

Rafe sighs, double-checking that the front door is locked for your peace of mind.

“I can’t be wasted if that asshole tries me. I haven’t taken anything since last night,” he says. “But it just made shit worse.”

He realizes how messed up it sounds. How messed up it is that being sober for one night makes him shake like this. He has a problem. But he never really had a reason to get clean before now.

You watch Rafe checking the lock and like a riptide, everything crashes down on you at once.

The torment from Ty harassing you. The guilt from asking Rafe to take on this responsibility. The sadness from knowing that he’s only doing it because he feels a sense of obligation for you and wants nothing more.

“Bet you’re glad I have a gun now,” Rafe mutters. He turns to look at you, your expression grim. “What?”

“I don’t want to keep bothering you with this,” you admit, your heart racing with panic. “I don’t want you to have to sleep here and I don’t want you to have to drive me home all the time and… I hate that this is happening and that I had to drag you into it.”

His eyes travel over the anguish etched on your face.

“What, like it’s your fault he’s a piece of shit?” he says.

You chew on the inside of your cheek and look up to the ceiling, trying to keep your tears at bay. It’s still odd being alone with him, having him in your home.

Rafe hasn’t tried to make someone feel better in a long time. He hasn’t cared enough to. He takes a deep breath.

“I don’t mind doing this, alright?” he says.

“You don’t?” You take in the softness in his eyes that you don’t often see.

“Think I’d be here if I did?”

“I don’t know,” you say. “You used to do things you didn’t want to all the time for me.”

The Rafe that was your best friend always went along with whatever you wanted to play, wherever you wanted to go.

He grits his teeth, tearing his eyes off of you, trying not to think about how when he was a kid, if someone asked him who his favorite person was, he’d tell them that it was a tie between you and his mom.

“Don’t talk about how shit used to be,” he says quietly. And because he doesn’t want to see that hurt look on your face again, he adds, “Please.”

The mere prospect of talking about the past seems to actually give him pain. It dawns on you that you’re looking at a man who may have never processed what happened to him.

“Do you want something to eat?��� you offer, changing the subject swiftly.

Rafe realizes he’s starving.

“Yeah,” he says.

A memory washes over you as Rafe sits at your kitchen counter, eating leftovers you heated up for him.

It was a humid summer day and you two were scarfing down the lunch his mother made for you after a morning of swimming behind his house.

Rafe always liked picking the wildflowers that grew in the grass that lined the beach for his mom. The ones he found that day were purple, sitting in a small vase she put in the center of the dining room table.

Every time he gave her a small bundle of uneven flowers, she had the same joyful reaction. Rafe always looked so proud of himself when she enthusiastically thanked her son.

It was just another happy day.

Until Ward came into the kitchen and like always, Rafe’s smile disappeared. Your best friend tended to shrink when his dad was around. Ward almost always found something to chide his son about. He never spoke like that to his daughters.

“Could you eat any faster?” Ward muttered. “Where are your manners?”

“Leave him alone, Ward,” Anne said with a sigh. His mother’s tone was only ever sharp when she was defending her little boy.

You remember watching her lean to kiss Rafe’s head, earning a small smile from him. Then she winked at you, trying to dismiss the tension from the room.

You wonder what Ward has said to Rafe ever since he lost the only person who stuck up for him.

You face the sink as you wash your hands, your back to Rafe, trying to stifle the tears that build as you imagine what the world would be like if the wreck never happened. Who would Rafe be if he never lost her? If a part of him didn’t die with her?

Is it crazy to think that you’d still be best friends, instead of two strangers pushed together in such an arduous situation? You miss her so much that it hurts and all this is yet another thing adding to the weight sitting on your shoulders.

Rafe hears you sniffle and when you finally turn around, you stare at the floor as you try to rush away.

“What is it?” he asks. Is he already failing at making you feel safe?

You freeze. You can’t tell him what’s really bothering you. Especially since he asked you not to talk about your memories.

“I’m just freaked out.” It’s not exactly what you’re thinking of now, but it’s true. This mess with Ty is a nightmare. “If he was really creeping around here… Ugh, I don’t know what he’s going to do next.”

Rafe chews slower as he observes you through narrow eyes. He’s no stranger to the pain of crying to sleep. He doesn’t want that for you.

You notice his hands are still trembling. You have no idea how often he does coke, but it must be an addiction if one night without it makes his body react like this.

“What else do you need?” he asks. It comes out sharper than he intended, like he’s asking what else you could possibly want from him after he’s given you so much.

Your lips thin as you stare at him from across the counter. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen someone look so miserable.

“Nothing,” you mutter. “Good night.”

You start to walk away but Rafe says your name to stop you and it sounds so good coming out of his mouth that your stomach numbs. When was the last time he said it?

You turn to look at him. His eyes dart down to his food.

“What if…” he begins, his fork loudly clattering against the dish. “Would it help if I slept in your room?”

You’re surprised. And soothed by the thought of him sleeping close by in case your ex does something as unhinged as break in.

Everyone else paints Rafe as rude and aggressive, but you knew it. You knew he still had some kindness in him.

“Yeah,” you say. “It would help.”

(part four)

if you want notifications on when i post my fics, follow @xorafe-library and turn on notifications 💘

[radioroxx]

THE. ISAFRIN KIDS I MENTIONED. shared little ocs of my mutuals server <3 love u collection muah muah im not tagging everyone in this tho

other doodles plus some rambling below vvv

- aurore(she/they) and philémon (he/him). they have their own nicknames etc because Who Are Isa and Sif Without Nicknames but. éile is much much more partial to use his than aurore. for her its, every now and then. for him its most of the time (like how bonnie goes by bonnie and not boniface)

- i dont remember how why we started making fankids but i do remember very early on in the conversation discussing the idea of wish kids. think that one fankid meme with the baby descending from the sky. thats a wish kid

- there are. a lot a lot of silly goofy ideas weve come up with for them (such as: isa being Not very good at hair and embarrassing himself trying to help out), but i think my brain would explode trying to remember it all lol. and type it out. feel free to ask ques abt them tho :)

- one thing we did talk about a bunch is! how siffrins background would play into it. having kids + starting a family with isabeau,, maybe feeling guilty over the culture they arent able to share. to make up for it! they! do what they can!!

theres no way to know for sure for sure if siffrins cloak is a island thing. or a family tradition. or just Something his parents did. regardless they would want to do the same for their own children! isa already makes tons and tons of outfits for em (you could imagine lol), so of course he has no issue helping out sif in this new project. (they got to help put with the design of their own cloaks though! for preference)

another thing siffrin wants to share with them is. easily. stars! the stars are something siffrin grew up knowing to be important (or well, he assumes so). so thats something they would want to share too :). maybe he cant remember their names, or constellations, or what any of it Means,, but they can still teach the science behind it! which is also very interesting!! the kinda stuff the kids would take to school the next day to impress other kids with lol

(i also just wanted an excuse to draw the family together,, can u blame me….)

- we also discussed. hypothetically if loop is still around by this point. their own feelings in this situation. its been years since the time loops were broken- years for loop to come to terms with, and mourn, etc. even still theres that feeling of bitterness that lingers, knowing they couldve had this. this couldve been them-

but also its. its hard to be angsty and upset around little kids. ehe

(we joked about loop becoming an awesome babysitter. the kids love them very much.)

ok thats all ur getting for now fjkd again feel free to ask questions weve been a little insane since yesterday

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

It's quite important to me that Jason and Bruce's conflict is not a misunderstanding.

I truly believe that if each of them had perfect omniscient knowledge of every detail of what happened surrounding Jason's death, not only would they still have conflict, but they would still have the SAME conflict. Neither the question nor the answer of Under the Red Hood's climax would change.

Sheila's betrayal is often known about in canon (frankly there is no way anyone but Jason should know; it is deeply unclear to me why comics allow others to be aware of this) and it does nothing to change anything.

Bruce's one off attempt to kill the Joker at most changes a few lines during Jason's plea to let him kill him ("Please! I know you wanted to, I know you tried to once, what changed? Did you forget about me? Did you stop caring? Did you fucking well forgive?! You for whom vengeance is your only life?")

Learning about the people Jason saved doesn't do much to assuage Bruce's horror at what Jason has become ("Each life is precious, unique, irreplaceable. It does not absolve him.")

Learning exactly what was done to mourn him modifies the depth and force of Jason's fury some ("You buried and destroyed all trace of me, the actual person, didn't even try to tell Dick, and then blamed my death on my own irresponsibility?!") But otherwise does very little.

Talia's involvement being revealed does nothing, because frankly she didn't do much of anything except stall this confrontation and give him a knife. It's a really cool knife, granted, but it sure as fuck didn't convince Jason this needed to happen!

The exact details of Tim's induction into the role have the largest effect - on an issue that is utterly tertiary to his main conflict with Bruce ("Oh wow, cool, great, the new kid you got to emotionally support you actually volunteered, and has parents so his entire well-being doesn't hinge on your approval. Congrats on approaching the bare fucking minimum! Now, wouldn't you agree that you have a duty to protect him by taking care of the murderer who killed me?! Instead of fucking demanding that he be good enough not to get killed?!")

I have a whole damn post on the can of worms Jason understanding the events of War Games would open! ("YOU LET ANOTHER ONE OF US DIE WHILE I WAS GONE?!?")

I am convinced that the only ways in which their conflict becomes less intense is through a misunderstanding.

And I like it that way. I'm really, really glad it's not a misunderstanding, and that it can't be resolved through better communication. Their issues are real and meaningful and cannot be swept away without one actually conceding to the other's demands.

[onskepa]

Left behind: You promise?

Hellooooooooooo everyone! Now the story will really starts kicking! Hope you guys enjoy this one!

Left behind series

------------------------

Third pov

It was like looking at his own dead body. There he was. His twin brother, his other half, dead right before him. Jake found it a bit cruel, his brother studied hard to be in a position to go to another planet, to be with the big science guys. Only to be killed by a simple, pointless crime. 

He didn't want his little girl to see her dead uncle. It would break her heart. It was only a few days ago they all had a cup of coffee and luxury sweets called cookies, did Tommy break the news. That he would be leaving Earth for the ideal planet called pandora. To make connections with life over there. 

It was a bittersweet goodbye since the travel to pandora is 5 years. 

It was best to not tell his little girl that her super smart uncle is dead. Best that she believes he left to space.

Third pov

“I'm sorry, WHAT?” 

“The RDA wants you to take your brother's place and continue what he couldn't even start”

Jake was at a loss. He needed to mourn for his loss but the officials couldnt even give him 5 fucking minutes. 

“The RDA wants me, a crippled ex-marine, to join them? What use would I be to them?” Jake asks, feeling a bit pissed off by the second. 

“More than you know. You see Mr. Sully, your brother was going to join the Avatar program, it is a section of the RDA where scientists use a body that looks like the pandorian natives. Those bodies costs billions of dollars to make. And not being used is a huge waste” one of the officials said, almost in a robotic way. 

“So?” Jake shrugs. 

“You have a 100% accurate DNA of your brothers avatar, they want you to join in the program and do the mission that was given to tommy” 

Jake scoffs. Slamming his fists against the table. 

“You want me to leave this place, leave my kid behind. Mind you, just to get to that planet takes 5 years! 5 years of me being gone away from my kid! The hell is wrong with you?!” he shouted. Jake was ready to leave them and just get back to his home, back to his daughter. 

The two officials looked at each other, having a silent conversation in their eyes. 

“Mr. Sully, I don't think you are in a position to reject this” 

“Oh, why the fuck not?” Jake tilts his head, almost ready to laugh out of his insanity. 

“We know you are financially unstable. Barely scraping by, making a clown of yourself in low cheap bars. Can't even give a good education for your kid. Jake, you are at the bottom of the trash, and even with your useless legs, you can't crawl up. But hear this. If you join the RDA, your daughter will be given the best education we can give her. All employees who work for the RDA, if they have kids, are given the utmost care. School, shelter, a chance in life” 

It was like a spell. 

The more those bastards talk, the more tempting it sounds to jake. 

His kid getting everything he can't provide? School? A warm bed? 

“But…..it's 5 years……10 years to and from…thats….that's too much I would be missing so many years of my kid…” Jake says rather weakly. 

“Oh jake….many parents make the biggest sacrifice to give their kid a better tomorrow. If you truly care for your kid, you leave her behind”  

Jake’s pov

“You are leaving…?” Her voice was weak. 

God damn it this is going to be a lot harder than I thought. 

I accepted the Devil’s offer. I will take my brother's place in exchange for my daughter having a better future. Sad to think it might not have me involved. But there is still time, she is still a baby. By the time I returned she might be a moody teen but still a kid. 

“You are not staying with me daddy?” my little angel asks. Her eyes, her beautiful blue eyes reflecting mine. 

“It won't be forever, baby, just for a little while. Uncle tommy needs my help” 

It took everything for my voice to not shake, my girl is a smart kid, she will sense my heart breaking. 

She crawled on my lap, her little face eager. “I wanna go with you!” she whines. Shaking my head I had to explain to her. 

“I'm sorry baby, but where I am going, kids are not allowed. Too dangerous. Its safe you stay here”. 

“With Miss Morve?” she questions. God I wish. 

“No, Misses Morve is too weak, you will be going to a school that will take good care of you. Doesnt that sound nice? You get to go to school like you always wanted. Make friends and eat all the yummy foods we see on the holograms. Doesn't that sound great?” I do my best to make it sound good. 

But stubbornly, she shakes her head. 

“It's not great! You won't be here! I wanna stay with you! You said it daddy! Sullys stick together!” 

My little girl started to cry her little heart out, and I followed. Hugging her really tight, we cried for a bit. 

“Don't leave me daddy!” she wails out. 

“I won't baby, I will always be with you. It will just be for a little while. It may feel like forever, but I will come back. I promise love” I tried to reassure her. 

Feeling her pull back a bit, I can see her eyes puffy red, tears still flowing out. God, seeing her cry makes my heart ache. My little angel does hold my heart in her hands. 

“You promise?” she asks, holding out her pinky finger. 

I intertwined my pinky finger. 

“I promise. No matter what baby girl, I will come back. Sullys stick together” 

Third pov 

Handing the handlers his child’s only luggage, Jake gives his daughter one last hug. But this hug will be the last for who knows how long. 

Jake’s little girl was crying her soul, not read to really let go at all. Wanting to be with her dad forever and ever. 

“Don't leave me please!!” she begs. This was really hard for Jake. Hard for both of them. And it took jake everything in him to not change his mind. To say no to the RDA, to take back his child and go back home. But this was for her. This was for the little sully girl. To give her everything she could ever want, it required the biggest sacrifice. And that was letting go. 

“I'm not leaving you. I will come back, I promise with my life babygirl” jake says. Giving her so many kisses. 

Sniffling away her tears, his little princess leaps up to give Jake a kiss on the cheek. 

“Be good, ok? Make friends, study hard, and before you know I am back for you” 

But little Sully was still scared. 

“You won't forget about me?” she asks, wanting to make sure her dad won't forget. 

“I could never forget you. My angel, my sunshine in the rain, my little princess "Jake praises. 

Wiping away her tears, his little girl takes a deep breathe. “You promised daddy. Sullys stick together…” she says, her voice shaking. 

“Sullys stick together, forever” 

Third pov 

“And there they go! Off to the beautiful planet Pandora '' the teacher says as she shows to her class the live recording of the RDA employees in the transportation ship leaving the Earth's atmosphere. 

Among the astonished woas of the little ones, little sully was watching the ship with her careful eyes. A small tear leaving her eye. There goes her daddy. But he will come back. He promised. So, if she is a good girl and does everything, her daddy will come back for her. 

He promised. 

Right?

I am so pleased with how it turned out! Tell me what you think! Until next time! See ya!

Like the story? Put your name on the taglist for the next update!

------------

Taglist:

@boobitchhehe @heart-an0n @justcaptiannoodles @mochacoffeeumai26 @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @skittlebum @teyamsbitch @ratchetprime211 @iwannabeapinkaesthetic

[eywamygoddesswrites]

— 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓷𝓽 — (sully family x fem!sully!reader)

pairing: sully family x fem!omatikaya!sully!reader

tags: mourning, getting therapy

warnings: lowercase intended, implied character death, angst

a/n: characters are aged up! this is inspired by that one tiktok audio and then my curiosity got the better of me and turns out, it was a whole youtube series and i was hooked on it. i've been wanting to make a fic based on that audio for a while but didn't know what characters to use. hope you guys enjoy despite it being angst ㅠㅠ

a/n 2: do you want a longer version of this oneshot? look no further because i will be making a short series based on the youtube series called "LUCIDS" and the masterlist can be found here!

word count: 1.1k

+ gif not mine. ctto.

y/n had been keeping herself busy for the past 3 months. she did everything to keep her mind off of everything. weaving baskets and nets like it was a project to give everyone in the clan, fishing for meals that can have her family full for 5 whole months, collecting and discarding every foraged stuff she could get from her endless walks, riding her ilu further and further beyond the reef just to feel something.

being the oldest of the sully kids was tiring but even being a sister wasn't able to make her feel anything. it was much more numbing than it should be. it made her distant from them.

lo'ak couldn't meet y/n in her eyes. it was like if they looked at each other, the walls they both built would crumble the second their gazes meet. it was like strangers being forced to get to know each other after knowing the horrible crimes they both did.

kiri was very concerned for her older sister. y/n exerts her energy beyond her capacity, does dangerous explorations beyond the reef, and sometimes come back with cuts and bruises, and how she would skip meals to finish all the projects she 'needs' to weave. she was overworking herself and in the 3 months y/n was busy, she had fainted countless times eventually norm and max were called when it kept happening.

tuk missed her big sister so much. she missed collecting pearls by the shore and being carried around while exploring the forest. she was scared at how y/n looked now. from once being a bubbly young adult who was curious and eager to learn something new to a drained-out, almost dead-looking na'vi who would kill people if she saw them looking at her weirdly.

if the three were concerned, imagine how her parents feel. it hurt jake and neytiri to see their oldest overwork herself to distract whatever she was feeling. jake knew how it felt like and he wanted to help his daughter badly. but each time he tried to talk to her, y/n would push him away further and further. she even hissed at him to make her point.

neytiri was angry and concerned. why was her daughter pushing her own mother away when all she wanted to do was help? y/n shouldn't push her away because as her mother, neytiri understands her more than y/n knows, or at least that's what she likes to think.

it was like y/n became a stranger that the sully's just allowed to stay in their home.

when y/n was fishing for dinner, her mind had been wandering elsewhere. her eyes stared down at the net she held as dread slowly filled her mind. it was like her sight was enlarging in front of her until she hears a distorted voice call out her name. "y/n."

she pulled away from her trance, eyes widening as her breathing became slightly erratic. y/n breathed in deeply through her nose and out through her mouth before her attention went to ao'nung, or what looked like ao'nung by the shore.

"hey there! just a quick update. tsireya is still swimming with the ikrans, who were gliding through the mountains on their bellies, then they ate an eye of a seaweed. now, the ilus and tulkans are fighting for some reason." ao'nung said, he was far away from y/n but somehow she heard everything clearly.

"oh… wow…" y/n says, clearly not understanding a single thing from what the metkayina had just said.

"how's your existential crisis coming along?" he asked so nonchalantly.

y/n was bewildered to say the least. this was the longest time she had held a conversation for how many months now.

"uh… fine?" she answered back but it sounded more like a question. "good!" ao'nung exclaimed back before turning around to leave when,

"ao'nung!" y/n immediately called for him, who turned back around to look. "can… can dreams also have memories?" that sounded wrong. "i mean, can you still have dreams even when you're dreaming?"

"oh, y/n. what else are memories if not dreams themselves?" ao'nung replies, not making as much sense as the question she asked.

"what–" "alright then, more soon!" ao'nung cuts her off before running off to eywa knows where.

y/n was left once again with her thoughts. she turns back to the net she was holding, only for it to be gone. this confused her and when she turned back to where the shore was, the next thing she knew, she was sitting on a giant rock.

"do you blame yourself?" the same distorted voice that called out her name earlier asked. distress filled her veins as she looked to where she heard the voice.

y/n's eyebrows furrowed. "what?" she asked. she saw herself, an exact copy of herself wearing human clothes that norm and max wear with a pen and paper held in her hands.

"well, it's quite common in this situation for a patient to feel a kind of guilt." her copy said, voice distorting more and more.

y/n's mind was in turmoil. "what situation?" she asked. the same dread she was feeling came into full force. her chest became heavy as it caused her to not breathe well.

her copy had this concerned look but the smallest of a smirk appeared on her lips, the following words leaving the copy's mouth. "the accident."

that's when y/n was transported back to the day neteyam had died.

she was there when he was shot through the chest. she knew the bullet was meant for her but he pushed her away and in turn, the faith of death fell upon him.

while the rest of her family had cried, she didn't. instead, she felt numb and angry. no other emotions filled her body except these two. it had helped her kill some sky people and some avatars when she came back to save kiri with her parents but after that, all y/n felt was numbness.

the heavy routine she placed upon herself became the only thing that made her feel something through the numbness she felt. it wasn't enough but at least it was something.

the same distorted voice came back. "it's very common for people to invent blame or create a causality" then the voice became normal in an abrupt manner, and her surroundings turned to norm's lab where he used his avatar and where they were able to breathe normally. "when in reality, it was completely out of your control." norm's voice was soft as he talked to the young na'vi in front of him, who in turn was staring off through the distance.

the forest where she and neteyam grew up, only for her brother to never come back home.

[gucciwins]

Hey!! Was wondering if you could do a dadrry blurb?? With H and y/n doing tummy time with the bubs on their playmat? 🥺 or just anything cute 🥰

something cute with dad harry as requested 🫶 enjoy, my love

+

Becoming a parent is something Harry always dreamed about. He looked forward to helping his baby eat, rock them to sleep, and even looking forward to changing their nappy. 

He was ready for everything but wasn’t prepared to see his son grow quickly every day. It seemed as if every time he blinked his son, Elio was onto the next milestone. 

Even the hard days were easy because of Y/N. 

His wife of four years seemed to have the answer for everything. Sometimes, she made it seem too easy being able to recognize the distinct cries of their child, but she reassured Harry that they were learning together. 

Work had allowed them both to take time off to enjoy the first month together, but Harry whined about returning to work once his time was up. He just couldn’t bear leaving Y/N and his son so soon. Although work did give him something to miss, he missed cuddling with his son and having that feeding time, but Y/N assured him those late-night wake-ups would still exist. Harry swore Elio grew an inch every time he walked out of the room. 

Harry wished he could stay tiny forever, but he was also ready for Elio to start speaking because Harry knew Elio would be the sweetest kid, especially with Y/N as his mother. 

The weekends were his favorite because he spent it at home with his family. They would walk around their neighborhood or have a picnic in the park. They were always doing something as a family. Right now, at five months old, Elio loves his tummy time. Y/N would lie on his stomach on a blanket Harry’s mother gifted Elio when he hit one month because his grandparents spoiled him as much as they could on any date and occasion. Elio was laid down with toys around him that he could reach for, which helped with his motor functions. Harry liked joining him as well. Y/N usually used this time to catch up on chores or little things around the house, but Harry convinced her it could all wait today. 

She sat on the floor, watching as Harry spoke to Elio. He talked to them about the day and weather, even how the Green Bay Packers were doing during the current season as if he could understand. Harry took Elio’s gurgles as responses and carried the conversation. It warmed Y/N’s heart to see how easily Harry fell into the father role, one he expressed he dreamed about far more than he thought was normal. Now, they sit here, watching Elio, who seems to be an exact replica of Harry except for his cute nose, which appears to be all Y/N. 

Y/N laughed as she caught Harry playing with the blocks she had laid out for Elio. He was building a tower, too lost in a trance explaining each step, all while Elio was swinging around a rattle that captured his attention. 

“Baby, those are for Bubs,” Harry turns to her, pouting, and while his attention is elsewhere, Elio uses that as a chance to swing his arm around and knocks Harry’s tower over. 

Harry turns back in shock, all while Y/N laughs. Little Elio joins his mother in laughing at Harry, who dramatically mourns his eight-block castle. 

“Did you enjoy that, Elio? Enjoy making Mummy laugh?” Harry asks Elio in a sweet voice reserved just for him. Elio’s response is two rattle shakes. 

“Tummy time over, Daddy wants cuddles!” Harry opens his arms, a gesture Elio has become familiar with, knowing he will be held. Elio replicates it, dropping his toy, and Harry, in one swoop, brings him to his chest. Harry kisses his head repeatedly as he whispers how much he loves him. 

“Bring him over!” Y/N makes grabby hands for Elio. 

Harry playfully turns away, “my turn.” 

“Then come cuddle me.” 

Harry thinks that sounds perfect, so as Y/N lays down on their couch, he passes Elio to her so she can rest him on her chest. Elio lets out a deep sigh as he settles into his mother’s hold. Harry knows Elio loves Y/N; if he had to choose a favorite parent, it’d be her. He understands Y/N’s perfect. She’s a perfect partner who loves him and respects him. Harry always feels showered by her love, and it’s not different for Elio. It‘s clear Elio loves receiving all her love, too. 

Harry lays down with his favorite people, his hand resting on Elio’s bum for support, and he knows life does not get better than this.

[gonedreaminggg]

levin and malachai headcanons

- they have a SEVERELY complicated relationship with Aphmau. they were kids when she left, levin around 4, and malachai was physically around 7. levin barely remembers her, and malachai was rarely even around her. she was always busy. levin hates her for abandoning him. he hears all of these stories of people holding her on a pedestal, but she left him. malachai understands a bit more. he's lived a longer life. he understands that people come and go and might not have a choice in the matter. that doesn't mean he holds much respect for aphmau. she's one of the only people who knows about his bio parents and how they abandoned him. and then she did the same.

- garroth is levin's biological father. honestly, at this point, the entire fandom has decided this is canon. but in this universe, garroth ACTUALLY steps up as a father figure to him. honestly, you know how garroth and liochant take care of lilith and alina all the time in mcd 3? that's basically garroth and laurance with levin and malachai here.

- laurance and malachai spent a lot of time together, both before and after the time jump. laurance understands him in a way no one else can. they've both lost their parents, and they've both spent years mourning people who never truly loved them. malachai calls laurance "dad", and laurance sometimes calls him "kid".

- when levin zoey and malachai first came back to Phoenix Drop, levin used to pray to the statue of lady irene to bring his mom back to him. like full blown, on his knees, sobbing, asking for his mother back. and when he found out that they were in the irene dimension, and that his mother WAS irene, he flipped. the healing that he had done to try and repair things with aphmau, was completely undone. they still have a hard time talking about it.

- malachai wanted to be lord of phoenix drop. he wanted to lead the phoenix alliance island. he wanted to be in charge, and he knew he could handle it. but levin was always "the rightful heir" and it pissed him off. he loves his brother, but he doesn't think he's responsible enough for the job.

- levin and malachai have a strained relationship, too. they were extremely close as children, and as teens, but once levin took on the position as lord everything kind of crumbled. levin was busy, malachai was jealous. he would find assignments, that would take long voyages, and assign them to himself. over time, malachai became a diplomat, and was reaching out to the villages that used to be part of the phoenix alliance. he wanted to do something notable. he wanted to keep his mother's legacy going. and he wanted to surpass her. too bad she's a literal goddess 🤷

have fun with this one, crazies

[torchflies]

Hi TG Fandom! 

Another day of me focusing on that TGM quote: “…no wife, no kids, nobody to mourn you when you burn in.” And it got me thinking… first of all, there’s no way that Bradley should have been saying any of that from his glass house, but also, if he did have those things then there’s no way he wouldn’t have been reunited with his family way earlier. Right?

The minute Bradley understands the feeling of never wanting your child to be hurt, to be in danger, and the feeling of doing what you know is best for your kid even though it makes them hate you? He instantly forgives Mav. He has to, because he would have wanted to do the exact same thing for a little girl in pink footie pajamas or a baby boy sleeping in his bassinet. He is Mav’s kid. 

Also, I like the idea of Bradley building this whole little family and losing his wife tragically (having their second child?) and the nuclear fallout that leads him to finally calling his family. 

I want them to come to Brooklyn and meet a Bradley who is changed in a way that only loss and war can do. 

A Bradley who is a pilot, a father of two, a pillar in his Jewish community (yes, because it’s my writing and I can do what I want) and the son-in-law of a Rabbi. A Bradley who is quiet, reserved and broken the same way Mav was when he lost Goose. A Bradley who has kept his fathers and the flyboys in his life through so many means, just in their absence. His children know who they are. Bradley converted and joined this massive Jewish community because even though he wasn’t involved in most of Ice’s traditions growing up, it still felt like home. His children love motorcycles, planes and volleyball. 

Give me a Bradley who grew up. A Bradley who regrets how he acted, one who is still angry but has the emotional maturity to understand the why, beyond his mother never wanted him to fly. 

I need Mav to see himself in a grieving Bradley, holding the hand of a little girl who looks just like his Baby Goose and a baby boy who looks like the daughter-in-law he will never know. 

I need Slider (because this is Slicemav, babeyyy) to cry while holding those babies in his big strong arms, assuring them and his son that there is life after all this pain. 

And I need Ice, to look at this little boy he raised that is now a fighter pilot, a proud Jewish man and realize that he’s done the thing he never thought he would be able to do. L’dor v’dor, from generation to generation — he loved Ice so much that instead of taking Abraham and Sarah as his parents during his conversion, he took Ice’s Hebrew name. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I like kidfics, Jewish stuff, Slicemav and angst 😘

[ruggiezz]

— BUT YOU'LL NEVER HAVE MY HEART : twisted wonderland

[synopsis] riddle never got the freedom he wanted, and now he has to marry a woman he doesn't even know

[characters] riddle rosehearts x reader

[extra] this is all pure angst and arranged marriage

The venue looked impeccable—a place where someone of his social standing would marry. The guests were renowned people, contacts his parents made, and people his parents advised him to have an amicable relationship with. Riddle doesn't know any of them, yet he still had to greet everyone with a smile.

This is his wedding, and it just feels... cold. This isn't how he had pictured his wedding would be.

When was the last time he saw his friends? It's not like they would be allowed to come, but he found himself missing them every day. Are Ace and Deuce just as close as they were before? Is Cater still up to the latest trends? Did Trey continue working for his family business?

And most importantly, are you doing well? Have you met someone else?

Everything went downhill the day he graduated. He thought, just like everybody else, that he had made progress in becoming more independent and that maybe, he could have the life he wanted instead of the one his parents planned for him, but the second he tried to open his mouth to tell his mother, he froze.

Riddle got his medical degree just like his parents expected of him, and he cut contact with everybody else without any explanation. The calls and texts kept coming, but they were never answered. What could he have told you after he suddenly disappeared? That he will never get to be together with you for the rest of your lives, like he promised? That he will think of you every day, and please don't forget him either? No, he can't do that to you; he can't let you mourn a relationship that wasn't meant to be. It's better if you believe he never loved you in the first place.

And now here he was, waiting to recite vows filled with empty promises of loving each other unconditionally, until death does them apart. But Riddle doesn't mean any of it, and the girl standing in front of him doesn't either.

It hurt. It hurt so much, he got a little taste of freedom only for it to get snatched from him not once but twice. He felt like that kid trapped inside his house again—that kid who got to experience unconditional love from his first friends only to get it taken away.

He wants to see you again, so badly. 

But if he sees you again, can he bring himself to say it to your face? What if he throws himself in your arms and cries, apologizing and begging you to forgive him? He's sure you would look as beautiful as the day he last saw you. Riddle wishes to see you so badly, yet he can't bring himself to even search for you. He feels like a coward and a traitor. He betrayed everybody who believed in him; he hurt them again, just like he did when he was a kid.

Please let this all be a nightmare, let him wake up in your arms in the middle of the night, let him tell you about this horrible nightmare he had as you calm him down. Please let him hold you, touch your cheeks, anything, anything that proves you're real.

As the wedding officiant kept talking and Riddle stood there on the aisle, he allowed himself to fantasize for a few seconds about the wedding you both could have had.

It would have been small and intimate. A wedding where Cater cheers and takes more photos than the hired photographer, where Trey is the best man, where Ace, Deuce, and Grim bawl their eyes out over seeing their best friend marry, and where Chenya sneaks to the catering table and eats as many pastries as he can. A wedding where he could place the ring in your hand and kiss you. Oh sevens, how he wished it was you standing next to him in the aisle, how beautiful you would look, and how giddy he would feel hearing you say yes.

But that would never happen.

“You may now kiss the bride.”

[rottenpumpkin13]

what if sephiroth had a child? maybe because hojo wanted to test if sephiroth's modified genes would pass on to the child. and what do you think would happen to the child after nibelheim?

Sephiroth's reaction to the revelation that he has involuntarily fathered a child is one of visceral rage. The sheer audacity of Hojo's brazen manipulation of his autonomy ignites a fury that is both immediate and uncontainable. This anger is not just for himself but also for his child that's now trapped in a lab, a mere specimen bred by Hojo for unspeakable purposes just as he once was. The thought of his child, his family, enduring the same remorseless torment he faced as a child is intolerable.

This moment rewires Sephiroth's brain entirely, causing all his previous convictions to crumble and for his priorities to shift. He makes a bold decision for the good of the small family unit he has now and leaves Shinra behind, fleeing with his child. Only Angeal and Genesis know where they are, and Sephiroth outright refuses their help.

Sephiroth is a dedicated parent and determined to offer his child a better life than the one Hojo gave him, despite him not having any experience with raising children. He does his research, has his moments where he's unsure if he's even capable of being a competent parent, but ultimately gives his child the unconditional love and support that he never had.

But the events surrounding Genesis and Angeal unfold whether Sephiroth is there or not. Genesis' degradation continues, leading him to desert, while Angeal meets his tragic end just as he would have. Sephiroth is no part of this, and while he mourns Angeal and wishes he could help Genesis, he focuses on his family.

Eventually Sephiroth decides to move to Nibelheim, because fate is persistent. He has no idea that this is the place he was born, nor did he know that he'd meet Zack once again during one if his missions. He hadn't even expected to see Genesis again, and feels guilty when he sees how the degradation has taken its toll on him.

Sephiroth would be more than willing to help, but Genesis' poor phrasing coupled with the way he drops a bomb on Sephiroth makes it so that Sephiroth never wants to see him again.

He drops his child off with Zack, finds the library, and the rest proceeds as it would, with the Nibelheim fire and Sephiroth's death. Except, years later when Zack breaks himself and Cloud out of Hojo's lab, he can't leave Sephiroth's kid behind, not with Hojo.

So Zack flees with Cloud and Sephiroth's child. Their escape is, regrettably, short-lived as Zack is ultimately killed. And now all Sephiroth's child has in this world is Cloud. Just the two of them.

Cloud stumbles into Midgar just as he would have if the fates had remained unchanged, except in this AU he has Sephiroth's kid clinging to his hand, placing all their trust in him.

Neither of them know that death rejected Sephiroth, who's watching them and intends to have his child back.

[threepandas]

Your Biggest Fan: Part 3

When he first showed up, people scoffed. He wasn't the first to try and claim such a grand name, nor would he be the last. They mocked him. Made unknowing targets of themselves. Didn't realize just how SERIOUS the situation WAS.

They thought he was a joke.

Because, after all, how could ANYTHING related to the Quirkless be a threat? How could ANYTHING related to those they'd failed, dismissed, and abused ever come back to haunt them? What vengeance and anger could possibly fester there? Turning into something ugly. Something powerful and dangerous.

The Red Shoed Onryō was no joke.

He was every ugly buried sin crawled into the light. Vengeance where no justice would ever be found. The cruelty that returns cruelty's actions. The monster the that hunts and haunts the living.

And of course, like everything related to the Quirkless, the news buried him. Covered their eyes and ears, hoping he'd go away. Letting him run free.

Hero after hero, refusing to take the case. Because he's "not a REAL threat". As though his influence wasn't spreading. As though his power wasn't GROWING. Willfully BLIND! At every turn, it baffled and infuriated you. Did Onyrō have to STAB them first, for them to SEE?!

Worst of all? He was either kidnapping or KILLING Quirkless kids. The most vulnerable youth in this entire god forsaken, willfully blind, country! There were days when you loved your country. There WERE. It's one of the reasons you became a Hero! But some days? You wanted to BEAT THE BIGOT out of your countrymen.

Especially when, once again, you were looking down at... at tiny little red shoes.

God.

God, they were just a KID.

A little kid. Face to solemn. Eyes too old for such a young body. Parents who can't be bothered to even remember the last time they SAW their son. He was SIX. It burns you. Every child, dead or missing on this God forsaken case. It BURNS. Every SINGLE one of their neighbors saw the crimes here and did nothing. The teachers. Nothing. Their own parents! Nothing!

Another child failed.

Another set of tiny shoes collected. Because these BASTARDS don't deserve to keep them. And a cry in the nearest park.

Damn this so called Onryō. DAMN HIM! They were just kids! He... oh god, he was just a kid...

There's an awkward shuffling near your bench. Ah. Probably a kid. Smile, Gaurdian. You gotta remember to smile! They're kids. They don't understand, SHOULDN'T understand, that sometimes Heros lose...

C'mon. Be brave. Smile.

You raise your head. And... oh. Not a kid. They're all still playing, off on the distant play structures. It's the anxious, green, quirkless man. The one who was real scuffed up. He looks better. Nervous though.

"A..Are YOU okay?" He manages to choke out, before you can say anything.

You huff a laugh. Well, isn't THAT a turn of events? Guess he remembers you. Good to know you're making an impact, at least. And... maybe it's something about how he clearly so uncomfortable, yet braving through it to offer comfort. Maybe it's because he's the first person to ASK in... God, months? But you answer honestly.

No. No you're not.

You keep it vague, of course. Case file confidentiality and all that. But... the victims. Oh god, the victims. Quirkless kids. As though life wasn't shit for them ENOUGH. It makes you want to BREAK things. People.

He listens as you rage. Curse and weep. Mourn.

The list of names Onryō IS going to answer for. Even if you have to hunt him down alone. Drag him back by yourself. Because it's not ABOUT the fucking hair care commercials! It's about saving lives. And what's the damn POINT of it all, if it's not all in service of that?

...Honestly? Green guy is a good listener. Seems to hang off your every word. Really engaged. It's nice, after so long being dismissed and ignored at ever turn. So much so... that you do something you probably shouldn't. It's TECHNICALLY crossing a couple lines, professionally. And you WERE taught better.

But....

Well.......

Fuck it. You're kinda lonely, you know? Yeah, he's a fan. You "saved" him with some band-aids. But it's not like you REALLY saved him! That would be crossing a boundary, right? Right. This is... probably? Fine? Maybe you could get a friend out of it.

Hey. Green. Gimme your phone real quick.

You input your number. Send yourself his. There. Now you guys can chat. Don't go crazy okay? He promises. Looks super excited to have a friend. And... yeah. Yeah! You have a good feeling about this. Greenie's name is apparently "Izuku". And what you both need?

Is a friend.

[josnhoes]

I would love to see if reader had a crush on someone, like she was madly in love and yandere Jason Todd, Yandere Damian Wayne, and Yandere Tim Drake found out. (Maybe yandere dicks reaction as an extra)

I'm going to assume this is in the young adult reader verse. So platonic (though since you said she I will use fem pronouns), if you wish for a romantic yandere separate from that verse let me know.

Note to readers this is a side story to the young adult reader story. It is not directly canon due to the use of gender.

Warning: Fem reader, yandere, murder mentions, obsession, over protective,

Jason knew his Sparky had a lot of love to give, and he figured eventually you'd end up in love. Granted, he'd figured since you never were outside of the manor without someone at your side that you wouldn't get a chance to. Oh boy, was he wrong.

The person in question was some rich kid who attended almost every gala or party due to their parent's part in the various charities Bruce ran. He knew because he'd tried to get Bruce to stop inviting them just so this blooming romance would fade. Yes, he was a romantic at heart, but he couldn't agree to *you* being the one involved in romance. You were too young and naive.

Since he couldn't get them uninvited and his siblings were failing as your guards and keepers, it looked like he'd have to step in. Jason had learned that despite Bruce's moral high ground of no murder that whenever the Wayne princess was involved murder was sanctioned. It was the only exception Bruce made. Usually he'd be pissed someone was more worthy of being killed for by Bruce, hadn't Jason been worthy of vengeance? But his baby sister was someone he saw as worth killing for too so Bruce got a pass...this time.

If he were a more patient man, he'd have dragged Tim in on this; but he wanted this budding romance gone. So he took care of it. You'd mourn, probably have a few breakdowns, but you didn't need to know it was him. Gotham *was* dangerous. After all, it could have been anyone who shot them.

Damian was somehow the most protective of the brothers; which said a lot since the entire family was willing to kill for you. But Damian was the one willing to torture for you. But for his devotion, he expected you to give him attention. Ideally, he'd be the focus of your attention, but he realized he had to share with his family.

That being said, anyone outside of the family he absolutely refused to let you give them even an ounce of your attention. Exceptions were people like doctors or therapists. As your brother, he wanted you to be healthy after all. Still when your attention wavered from the family to some budding socialite from the Galas he was enraged.

Not at you, he realized as a human on so sheltered his darling sister would naturally crave bonds with others. Romantic ones were inevitable; and maybe some day when you were older and it was someone he could approve of he would have let it continue. This was not that. This was an unknown; one who would put you in more danger.

He debated what to do about this problem. Clearly he had to keep you both apart. Tripling his hovering in galas and the rare occasions you left the manor. But that wasn't enough for him. Damian knew a proper threat and maybe some light torture would scare them away from you, the only question was did he do it in his old league uniform or as Robin.

The league of shadows garb would ensure the continued positive image of the vigilantes, but the Robin costume would make people second guess the socialite and their sanity. Well he'd hoped so, then again he *was* known as the stabby Robin. League gear it was.

No matter your feelings for this person, Damian knew you'd get over them. You had him. You didn't truly need anyone else.

Tim was all for giving you online freedom. Or an illusion of it anyway. Everything you did was monitored, and any attempt to lash out and try and call for help was prevented by your device's new program. But you hadn't even tried that in months; he'd figured you'd finally stopped trying to rebel, but that wouldn't gain you any extra freedom.

Your emotional attachment to the new person was worrisome. The socialite had approached you and charmed you at an event when Dick was supposed to be watching you. From there, a small romance began budding online. A fact that was loathed by Tim. As your big brother he had to protect your honor.

He was saving physical retaliation for a last ditch option. Instead, he'd planned a mind game. Hacked phones and social media leaking the socialite's secrets. Bank accounts being flagged. Even forging a few criminal charges. Every bit of their life was going to suffer.

Some would say that was more cruel than simply physically handling them, but Tim knew those kind of things were far longer lasting. You would see the worst in them, and if that didn't keep you apart, then the way their life would burn would keep them too busy for you.

If all of that failed, Tim had no problem making them disappear.

[buggachat]

I'm so curious to hear your thoughts. do you think Gabriel will ACTUALLY die? Or Nathalie? or will they both get healed??? Will Emilie actually get revived? The latter was always something I thought the show would do, but I also feel like this show is hard to predict sometimes. If Emilie does come back, I can't imagine she'd be too thrilled when she learns what Gabe's been up to that the two of them would go back to being a happy loving couple. #eminath2022

honestly it's SO HARD to predict how this series could possibly end. Adrien's story is so clearly set up as a tragedy, completely doomed by the narrative, and there's sufficient foreshadowing that he could possibly die/be sacrificed.... but I also believe that IF that happens he'd be revived and will ultimately receive a happy ending, because he's a main/beloved character of a children's show (also future-chat noir was alive in timetagger). So how will Adrien get a happy ending? Who will parent this child? UHHHHH

Personally, I really hope they don't revive Emilie, even if that's maybe the most obvious way for Adrien to have a happy ending. I think it'd maybe be a little questionable for kids who watch the show and relate to Adrien's struggles of losing a parent, and also I think that it'd kind of... prove Gabriel right? I think Gabriel would happily sacrifice ANYTHING, including his own life, to save Emilie, and I think him essentially doing that, sacrificing EVERYTHING to revive Emilie, and then everyone in the show being better off for it and it being the "happy ending" would kind of mess with the themes. Gabriel isn't supposed to be right. He's supposed to be wrong, he's supposed to be deluded that Emilie can be saved, he's supposed to be wrong in refusing to mourn her properly and move on, and with those themes in mind I don't think it'd make sense for her to be brought back. Maybe temporarily, but not permanently, y'know?

As for the fate of Gabriel and Nathalie.... I DON'T KNOW.... I DON'T KNOW!!! I feel like I almost want to say that Gabriel will just flat out die, but can they do that??? It's a kids show??? WOULD they kill Gabriel??? I don't know!! I DON'T KNOW.... but also there's something so poetically beautiful about Gabriel being the cause of his own demise, y'know? He did this to himself. This is his punishment. Ladybug and Chat Noir don't even have to decide his fate, he decided it himself, and I love that. And even if they find a way to heal the cataclysm, would it heal his mind after being driven mad by all the miraculouses? I...... I don't know that they can do that. How weird would it be, if the series ended with Gabriel suddenly healthy in body and mind again? And then what? He goes back to raising Adrien like nothing happened? It's almost easier to picture him flat out dying, or going to prison with an implied shortened lifespan or something. Gabriel should not continue to have custody of Adrien after all is said and done.

Nathalie would make more sense to survive, I suppose, because even if her fate has been sealed for longer and more solidly, she's a more redeemable character. In fact, I'd say Passion implies that she's very redeemable now, and is even actively trying to step in and be a mother-figure to Adrien now, which makes her a solid contender for being Adrien's post-plot guardian... but it still doesn't feel quite right, because just like Gabriel, Nathalie did this to herself, and her illness is her poetic punishment for her crimes, and we have no reason to believe that her illness can be cured, and we know it's fatal because of Emilie. That, and even if she regrets it now, she still aided and abetted Adrien's abusive father.... so........ I................... .....?

I'm really at a loss here, because I can't predict at all where this could all possibly go. If not Emilie, Gabriel, or Nathalie, who will take care of Adrien?

I know a lot of people use Gorilla for this role, and I don't blame them because there's really no other option, but I've never bought it. Gorilla is.... essentially just.... Some Vaguely Decent Man™ who works for Gabriel, and I really don't get anything from him or from his relationship with Adrien beyond that. Like yes, he's nice to Adrien in a way that probably any Vaguely Decent Man™ would be, and Adrien likes him fine in the same way that Adrien likes everyone, but that's... kind of it? Fanon takes Gorilla and Adrien's relationship and runs with it, and that's fun and all, but in canon there's virtually nothing there, and I'm sure that if Gorilla adopting him was the intended ending, they'd be developing their relationship more than the nothing that we've gotten.

All that really leaves is Amelie, his aunt, who lives in a different country? That seems the most logical, but also would have a huge affect on future seasons of the show if Adrien left the country. Maybe there's some interesting plot stuff they could do with that, and with Adrien and Félix living together, but it almost feels too AUish for me to comfortably predict that it would happen in canon.

sorry this turned into a long ramble where my conclusion is basically a big "I don't know". But anyway, I'm actually really excited to see where this all ends up! I love how unpredictable this show can be.

My only semi-Serious prediction is: I can just picture an episode where Gabriel actually wins, where he recreates his world, and maybe Adrien isn't in it, like Adrien was the one transferred to the casket in the basement (or maybe Adrien was the one who made the wish, and willingly chose to sacrifice himself, because of Adrien's established sacrificial tendencies? idk), and Emilie denounces Gabriel and walks out on him and Gabriel realizes that everything that he's done has been for nothing, that his dream was never real and never could be, and then they somehow undo that timeline and bring everything back into the regular timeline. Idk how any of that would happen, but I'd like it so :)

("It's just bad writing" No Fun Allowed responders DNI)

[jpmarvel90]

Don't let me down - Mini Series

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Relationship: MamaScarlett x 16 yr old Reader

Summary: Y/n is shocked to learn that her biological mother wants to get in contact with her. She's even more shocked when she finds out who she is. However, after the troubled childhood she's had, can she find it in her to forgive her?

Word count: 10266

Y/n's POV:

Being called into the main office at the foster home was never a good thing. I've lost count of the times that I have left there with a new bruise or cut. I never understood why someone would want to run a home like this if they hated children. But Mr Woodstock did it anyway. It's not even like it pays well. He's barely able to keep up with his smoking and drinking habits. Food for us kids being the last thing on his mind some weeks. So, I can only guess that he does it because he gets a genuine kick out of being a dick to kids.

I'm 16 and have been in this particular home for 18 months. Before that I was living with my adoptive parents. In the grand scheme of things, this foster home was heaven compared to where I lived with my parents. If you could even call them that. For nearly 15 years I was treated like shit. I was at my parents' beck and call for whatever they wanted or needed doing.

My weekends and evenings were spent cleaning or cooking for them. I didn't have time for friends. I was to go to school and come straight home. If they could, I'm sure they would have not allowed me to go to school. But they didn't get permission to home school me, so it was the only solace that I had.

I never knew love. I would see parents pick their kids up from school with smiles on their faces, hugging them tightly. At lunch, most kids had a lunch prepared by their parents. I was lucky if I was given a dollar to get a chocolate bar. I was constantly reminded of the life I didn't have.

I've always known that I was adopted. Apparently, my parents were doing a favour to a friend that was a social worker. They almost resented that they had agreed to adopt me. I'm a kid not a dog. It's not something that you do as a favour. But they treated me like it was my fault that they were stuck with me. They made my life hell because of it.

I tried to talk to my teachers about what was going on at home. I'd show them the bruises and tell them what they would make me do, but when I got told that I was overreacting, I stopped trying. I had to accept that this was my life, and no one was going to help me.

There was a slither of hope 18 months ago when my parents died in a car accident. I knew that I would be moved into a foster home, but I thought that it wouldn't be as bad as my home was. Which was true, but it wasn't far off it. Turns out that Mr Woodstock is friends with the same social worker as my parents and I was left here to spend the last two years or my childhood.

I felt wrong for not mourning my parents. I felt guilty that I was happy. For a brief time anyway. I thought that maybe I would get a chance to have some happy years in my childhood. But life is cruel, and it wasn't meant to be. I just need to hang on until I'm able to move from this godforsaken home and try and make something for myself.

The only brightside of the foster home is that there is a lot more freedom. We have some chores around the home, but with the number of kids there, we get it done quite easily. The rest of the time, I just try and avoid being around the home. It's too much of a risk if Mr Woodstock catches you when he's drunk or hungover.

Since being in the home, I actually had the chance to make friends. I joined the soccer club after school as an excuse to not go home and I loved it. For the first time, I felt like I belonged somewhere. Coach Sanders is great and it's my favourite time of the week. Through the team I've made some great friends. Laura is my best friend. She's a complete goof and I love spending time with her.

She knows everything about me. The only person who does. She lets me stay at her house when I can, has me over in the evenings to prolong the time before I have to head back to the home. We're both hoping to get a scholarship to a D1 college. For me, it's the only way I'll be able to go. I have no money behind me and no parents to help. But if I could get a scholarship, I wouldn't have to worry.

Our number one choice is Pittsburgh. Laura has family there and for me, it's far enough away from New York that perhaps I could start my life off new. Make a life for myself in the steel city. But there are still two years left of school yet before any of that can happen. But it's my motivation. It makes me work hard in school and get the best grades that I can. Maybe I can make something of my life after all.

Anyway, back to being called into Mr Woodstock's office. I make my way downstairs, hesitant to open the door. But knowing the longer I take, the more I'll be punished, I swallow down the fear and push the door open. "Sir, you asked for me." I greet him, my eyes on the floor. "Ah yes. Y/n. Please come in and take a seat." His chipper voice takes me off guard. I look up and see the reason for it. A man in a suit is sat opposite him with a warm smile.

"This here is Mr Osborne. He would like to talk to you. I will give you a minute of privacy." Mr Woodstock introduces the man before standing from behind his desk and vacating the office. "Ms Y/l/n. It's a pleasure to meet you. Please just call me Danny." The man in the suit holds his hand out to me and I reluctantly take it. My senses are heightened, not sure what his intensions are. My history in these situations hasn't been good.

"It's ok. You're safe. I'm not going to hurt you." He reassures me, obviously sensing my nerves. My body instantly relaxes at his words, and I hesitantly shake his hand. "How can I help you Sir?" I ask him, taking a seat next to him. "I'm a lawyer and I represent your biological mother." He explains. I instantly gasp at his words, never thinking that I would know anything more about my biological parents.

"She would like to reach out to you and perhaps potentially meet you." He carries on explaining whilst I just sit there in shock. She wants to meet me. Why now? "Would that be something that you are interested in?" Danny asks me, his voice remaining calm. I don't respond, my mind is going a mile a minute. "There is no pressure to do so at all. Everything will be on your terms. If you make the decision to not meet her, then that is completely fine." He tells me.

I rub my hands up and down the tops of my legs. My palms feeling sweaty. What do I do? I never thought I would get this opportunity. Do I even want to meet this woman? My life is hell. There were days I would wish that I wouldn't wake up and it's all because of my adoptive parents. "I uh. I'm not sure." I finally find my voice, not wanting to be rude. From experience, if you don't respond to an adult's question, it doesn't end well.

"That's ok Y/n. There is no pressure to do anything that you're not comfortable with." He kindly says, but I can't help the scoff that comes out. I've been made to do many things that I'm not comfortable with and no adult has given a damn in the past. He instantly frowns at my reaction, and I panic. "Uh. Could you perhaps tell me a little about her?" I ask him, hoping that might help me to make my decision.

"Of course. Though I have to warn you that it may all be a bit of a shock to you." He says with a bit of a chuckle. I sit back more in my chair, feeling more comfortable around Danny. He seems kind and I'm not waiting for the moment that his mood changes. "Her name is Scarlett. She is 38 and lives in the Upper East Side in Manhattan." He starts off. "Wow. Upper East Side? That's fancy." I reply to which he chuckles. I guess she didn't give me up because money was an issue!

"You may have heard of Scarlett. Her last name is Johansson and she's an actress." At his words, my mouth drops open. Ok this has to be some kind of a joke. "Ok, this isn't fair. You know, it's not nice to play tricks on foster kids. We're not just here for you to get your kicks out of." I hiss angrily, standing up to leave. I'm not here to be the butt of someone's sick joke. Before I can pass him, he quickly reaches out to grab my arm. "What? No wait. Please Y/n. I'm not lying. I would never. Please just sit." He falters over his words but quickly releases my wrist when he sees that my wide eyed gaze is fixated on his hand. "I'm sorry." He apologises, his eyes showing regret.

I hesitantly retake my seat and allow him to carry on. "Scarlett was 22 when she put you up for adoption. It was a very hard decision for her. But she is very keen to meet up with you now. She asked me to come and see you specifically to tell you." He says and I can see the truth behind his words. It's something that I've become good at over the years. I can see when someone is lying. "Why now?" I ask, unsure what could possibly make her want to see me now.

"Well, she's been trying to find you for a couple of years now. But with the adoption, she wasn't able to contact you directly. When you got moved back into the foster home, her rights changed, and she is able to do so now. I'm very sorry to hear about your parents by the way." He explains, his voice laced with sympathy as he spoke of my parents. Again, I had to fight the scoff, if only he knew. "Scarlett understands that this is all going to be a lot for you to process. But she is willing to meet you somewhere that you feel most comfortable. Perhaps here..." "No." I quickly cut him off. Probably a little too quickly as I see concern flash in his eyes. "Ok, that's not a problem. We can arrange for you to meet her somewhere you feel safe and comfortable." He adjusts his comment.

I fiddle with my fingers as I think over the request. I've never wanted to meet my biological parents. I have too much anger towards them. But I also have so many questions for them. Maybe if I know that she is a horrible person herself, then it will make the fact that I grew up in hell a little easier to bare. "Ok." I mumble, not confident in my answer. "Really?" Danny asks, a smile growing on his face. I simply nod and I can't help but notice his excitement growing. "Oh, she's going to be so happy that you accepted. Where would you like to meet?" He asks, taking out a pen from his bag.

I think for a moment where I feel most comfortable. "There's a café on Franklin Avenue near Prospect Park. It's called Cuppa Joe's." I tell him. It's my favourite place to go. Laura and I visit most days and on Thursdays we come with the team after practice. "Ok. I'll confirm when she is free and confirm with Mr Woodstock the time and date." Danny tells me, closing his pad and packing his things away. He then hands me a card. "Please, contact me if you need anything. I've noted my personal mobile on the back too." I take the card and flip it over and sure enough see his number. "Uh. Thanks." I smile, shaking his held out hand.

I walk him to the door, still in a slight state of shock. But before I know it, my feet are taking me to my room to grab my bag and then they're hitting the pavement taking me to Laura's house.

Safe to say she was a lot more squealy when she heard the news. She is a complete Marvel geek. Don't get me wrong, I like the movies, but Laura reads the comics and has watched every movie at least 10 times. "This is amazing Y/n." She says when she finally calms down. But my mood doesn't match hers. "Isn't it?" She clarifies when she sees how my mood has changed. "Talk to my Y/n/n." She says turning to face me more.

"She already has a family. She's married with two kids. What could she possibly want with me? Is it just so she can clear her conscience that she made the right decision 16 years ago?" I share my feelings with Laura, who's face contorts with empathy. "Oh Y/n. Maybe she wants to have you in her life? Make things right again." She tries to make me look on the brightside. But as someone who never gets a silver lining, it's hard to do.

"She's gone on to live this amazing life all because she gave me up, whilst I was living in constant fear. Never knowing when the next beating was coming, wondering if my life was ever going to get any better. The sad thing is, I consider this foster home better! This is the best my life has been, and it is still something no kid should have to go through." I admit, tears starting to fall down my face.

I hated being this vulnerable, but Laura was the one person I felt safe being around. She quickly engulfs me in a hug. She hates that there is very little she can do. But what she doesn't know is she is the light, the one good thing in my life. "I know that nothing will change your past, but maybe this can change your future for the better. If nothing else, you can get some closure and then we focus on our future at college!" She says reassuring me.

"I'm scared." I admit. Although I'm not in a safe environment, I know it and I know what I can do to protect myself as best I can. But this is something I have no control over. An adult I don't know and don't know their intentions. I lose control over the situation. "I know that you don't know what is waiting for you. But no matter what happens, I will be there for you. I will always be here for you Y/n/n." She comforts me, placing a kiss against my head.

I stay for dinner at Laura's, and we talk more about everything, and she is being her usual amazing self and giving me the best advice. I really am so lucky to have her in my life.

Eventually, I have to head home. I give Laura a big hug and start my journey back to the home. When I get inside, I'm met by a sober Mr Woodstock, which is very unusual. "Y/n!" He calls me and I flinch slightly. He walks closer to me, and I hold my breath, waiting for the scolding that is coming my way. "Here. All the info for meeting your mom." He says with a smile. I take the note from his hand, waiting for the other shoe to drop. "Here's some money for a taxi to take you." He adds on, holding out a 20 dollar bill. I hesitate but he waves it to me. "Not trick here Y/n." He smiles so I take it and make my way upstairs. Ok that was weird.

I read the note and see that she wants to meet on Friday at 4pm. That works well as I can get from school to the café in plenty of time. It's only two days away and it's scary to think that I'm going to be meeting my bio mom. It's even scarier to think that it's Scarlett Johansson.

__________

I'm currently sat in the café waiting for Scarlett to turn up. With the taxi, I was able to get here 15 minutes early. I pick a table in the corner out of the way. I'm sure she doesn't want to be too much in the open. I spend my time texting Laura, who is doing a great job at supporting me. I order a hot chocolate, knowing that having too much caffeine right now is probably not a good thing.

I can feel my nerves growing as the clock slowly ticks towards 4. My eyes keep falling to the door every time I hear the bell go. My heart rate spiking each time, only to calm when I see it's not her.

10 minutes go by, then 20 and there is still no sign of her. Maybe this was all some big joke and Mr Woodstock is watching me, getting a kick out of a new way to abuse me mentally. I finish my hot chocolate and as the clock hits half past 4, I decide that enough is enough. I'm not waiting anymore. Even if this isn't some big joke, the fact that she hasn't turned up tells me everything that I need to know.

Fighting off tears, I collect my bag and slip some money into the tip jar as I make my way out of the café. I instantly start to walk towards the park, taking a seat on the closest bench. She didn't turn up. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. Why did I think that anything was going to go right for me. This isn't some fairy tale where we all live happily ever after. I grab my phone and text Laura.

Y/n: She didn't come

It's all I can say. Anything more and it makes my heart ache more. She didn't come. She stood me up. She wanted to meet me. She instigated this and decided that she wasn't going to show. I was happy in my dark little world. I knew the threats and what could hurt me. I knew how to keep that to a minimum. It wasn't a good life, but it was a life I knew and saw an exit to. I should never have even entertained the idea of meeting Scarlett. She was happy to leave me once, why would she want to follow through this time.

I get lost in my own dark thoughts, questioning my self-worth. No one has or will ever want me. As if the world wants to add to my misery, rain starts to fall. But I don't move. It's weirdly comforting as my tears mix with the raindrops that hit my cheeks. It feels like my heart is cracking. Which is stupid. I don't know this woman. She just happened to birth me and now disappoint me once again.

Scarlett's POV:

For 16 years I have woken up every morning and wondered what my daughter would be doing. From the moment I signed the adoption papers I regretted it. But it was the right choice. I couldn't give her the life she deserved, at least this way, she was able to have a family that could devote time to her and love her. My career was just starting to take off and having a child wouldn't have been fair to either of us.

My parents offered to help, but I didn't want to be an absentee mother when another could provide her with the home she deserved. When I had Rose, was when I started to look for Y/n. But I wasn't able to do so until she was 18. I had signed my parental rights away and unless Y/n made the decision to reach out to me, I wasn't able to do anything.

It was almost torture waiting for the days to pass so I could get in contact with her. When I married Colin, I told him everything, that I wanted to reach out and have a relationship with her. He was really supportive of me and said that he couldn't wait to meet her, and that Rose and Cosmo would love having an older sister.

I was shocked, however, when my lawyer contacted me to say that Y/n had been moved to a foster home. I had a meeting with Danny where I learnt that Y/n's parents had been killed in a car accident and that there was no immediate family to take her in. So, she became a child of the state and because of her age, was moved to a group home. This was my chance to see her. To try and have a relationship with my daughter. One that I had craved for years.

Colin and I were waiting anxiously for Danny to come by after visiting Y/n. We decided it would be best if he went and met her to arrange for me to see her separately, once she had a chance to take it all in. It killed me that she was so close, yet so far from me. "Scar, babe. Sit down. He'll be here soon." Colin tries to calm me by placing a hand on my shoulder. I go to respond, but the knock at the door has me rushing through the house to answer it.

I let out a sigh of relief when I see Danny at the door. "Hi. Please come in." I greet him, holding the door open to him. He follows me through to the living room where Colin is waiting. We offer him a drink and then get down to business. "How was she? Did she agree to meet me?" I ask quickly, which causes Danny to chuckle. "She was rightfully shocked. At first, she thought that it was a joke and tried to leave." He explains. "But I managed to convince her to hear me out." He adds on and I relax.

I can't imagine what it must all be like for her. Losing your parents, moving into a group home, and now being told your biological mother is a famous actress. "She has agreed to meet you and has suggested a café that she visits regularly in Brooklyn. It seems like it's a safe space for her." He shares and I let out a little sob knowing that she has agreed to see me. "I can't believe it. I'm going to meet my daughter." I cry whilst Colin holds me close.

"Did you talk much? Is she happy? What's she like?" I rattle off questions, but I see that Danny falters and it makes my heart stop. "What's wrong?" I question and he sighs. "It's nothing, we'll just focus on the meeting." He tries to deflect but I don't allow him. "No. Please share what it is." I request, causing him to sigh once again. "It's just a feeling. It's probably nothing." He defends, but he's struggling to make eye contact.

Danny has been my lawyer for years. He's a good friend and I like to think I can read him. He's great at his job and a gut feeling for him is more often than not, right. "Danny." I say lowly, showing that I'm not wanting to mess around. "I just have some concerns. I plan to do a bit of investigating and then I can confirm more." He explains.

I feel my breathing hitch. "What concerns? And don't tell me it's nothing." I snap at him, waiting expectantly for an answer. "She shows signs that she may have been abused. She was extremely nervous in not only mine, but also the care home manager's presence. I had to convince her that she was safe so she would sit with me. It was obvious that she doesn't feel safe in that home and when I touched her, she flinched and was hyper focused on the touch." He shares and I think that my heart broke in that moment. "But she's been through a lot. Her parents haven't long passed, and she's been uprooted into a new home. A care home at that. Surely that could explain it." Colin suggests, but I can tell by Danny's look, there is more.

"That's the thing. When I brought up her parents, she almost looked relieved. It's something I couldn't put my finger on, but it just didn't feel right." There was a silence as we let his words sink in. Danny has been in the game for a long time. Any gut feeling is based off of years of experience. He works a lot with foster kids and if he thinks something is up, it's most likely that it is. "Mr Woodstock gave me information on her previous family, and I plan to do some research and pull together some information. Which I will of course share with you, but it may take a few days though." He says and I nod, not trusting my words in this moment.

Fear washes over me at the thought that my daughter wasn't in fact in a safe and loving home. The thought that someone might have hurt her makes me feel sick to my stomach. What makes it all worse is that it's all my own fault. She could be with me, safe and sound, but I was selfish and put my career first.

"I know this is a lot to take in. But for now, let's arrange a meet up and we can go from there." Danny offers with a warm smile. "Ok. Let's get something in sooner rather than later. I don't want to wait too long to meet her." I say, instantly grabbing my phone to find some time to meet her.

Friday ends up being the best day. I'm filming in the morning but have the afternoon off so I can meet up with her after she's finished school. Colin agrees that I'll go on my own to start off with and if things go well, then he'll come along next time. It makes my heart swell every time he talks about her. He's almost as excited to meet her as I am. I just can't wait for Friday to come around. I finally get to meet my little girl.

__________

I couldn't be any angrier. Shooting has over run and I'm currently rushing to my trailer to get changed so I can go and meet Y/n. I was meant to finish at 12 but it's now half past 3 and I'm only just getting off set. The director tries to stop me to talk, but I quickly tell him that I have an appointment that I simply cannot miss and will call him later.

My heart feels like it's going to thump through my chest as I sit in the car on the way to the café. It's all the way on the other side of the city in Brooklyn and I watch as the clock ticks over 4pm. I'm late. This is really not a good start. I just hope that she will wait for me. When I finally pull up at the café, I jump out the car and see that its' 5pm. Fuck, she's not going to be here.

I rush in the café and a few heads look up at me as I frantically look around. I don't see her anywhere. I take a deep breath and make my way over to the counter. "Hi, excuse me." I greet the older lady who gives me a warm smile. "Yes dear. How can I help you?" She asks. "I'm looking for a girl. Her name is Y/n and I think she comes in here quite regularly." I explain and her smile grows wider. "Ah yes. We see Y/n a few times a week. But I'm sorry you missed her. She left in a bit of a hurry about 30 minutes ago." She informs me and my heart sinks. "Oh ok. Do you have any idea of where she might go?" I ask but she shakes her head. "Anywhere but home." She answers and then turns to the customer who has just walked in.

I make my way back into the car and sob. I'm sure my driver thinks that I've lost it, but I've screwed up. I've blown my only chance to meet my daughter. I just wanted to make things right. To help calm me down, I call Colin, who listens and helps to stop me falling into a panic attack. "You need to try and find her. She is probably thinking that it was done on purpose and is hurting right now." He says whilst I nod into the phone. "Start with the home." He says but I quickly disagree. "The lady in the café said she'd be anywhere but home." I inform him. "Well, that's not a good sign." He mumbles which just makes my panic increase again. "You've got nowhere else to start. They might know where she is and it's already getting late, so you never know, she might have gone home already." Colin talks sense.

I agree and then decide to call Danny. I explain what happened and he agrees to meet me at the group home. But this time it's already getting close to 7pm and I'm becoming more desperate by the minute. Danny and I both pull up at the same time and he is quick to stop me. "What?" I snap at him, but he just grips me tighter. "You need to take a minute ok. You can't go in there all worked up." He says sternly. I listen to him, knowing that he's right.

It's late and I pray that she's come home. We walk to the entrance, and I knock on the door. We're greeted by an older looking man and instantly the smell of alcohol is evident. I look towards Danny who has a harsh look on his face. "We're here to see Y/n Y/l/n." Danny tells him but the guy laughs. "She's not here." He slurs and it makes my anger build.

I feel a hand on my arm as Danny tries to calm me. "Mr Woodstock. Would you know where she might be? Ms Johansson here missed her appointment with her and would like to see her." He says calmly. "It's still early, she probably won't be home until later. She's probably at a friend's house." He states, clearly no longer interested in this conversation. "She's in your charge, how can you not know where she is?" I bark at him and his gaze snaps to mine. "I wasn't the one to stand her up." He snarls before turning to leave.

But before the door can shut, we hear a girl calling out from behind us. "Mr Woodstock!" He stops in his tracks and looks the girl up and down. "I'm Laura, Y/n's friend." She says and he nods. "I remember." He gets a smarmy smirk on his face, and it makes me feel sick. "She was supposed to come to mine this evening, but she didn't turn up. Is she home?" She asks, worry lacing her voice.

"No, she's not back yet. Check back tomorrow." He says and slams the door. "Fuck." I hear the girl mutter and turn to leave. "Wait!" I call after her and she stops, turning to look at me. "You know Y/n?" I question her. She's shocked when she sees me, but that shock soon turns to anger. "What do you want?" She growls at me. "I'm trying to find Y/n." I say but she laughs. "What so you can let her down again?" She asks with sass.

My mouth just opens and closes, unsure what to say. "It took a lot for her to agree to meet you. She's been through so much in her life. She deserves better. I told her that maybe you wanted to give her that. But I was wrong." Her voice seems broken. She clearly cares about Y/n a lot. The pain is evident in her voice. "Do you have her phone number?" Danny asks Laura and she nods. "Do you think you could share it with us?" He asks but she shakes her head. "No." She states firmly. I step forward, trying to hold it together. "Please. I just want to talk to her. Apologise." I say, fighting back the tears. "I'm not sharing her number with a stranger. Besides, she's not even responding to me right now, so I doubt she'd respond to you." She scoffs.

She's right. That is all I am to her. I have loved her even though she wasn't in my life, but for her, I'm just the woman who gave her up. I quickly fumble in my bag for a pen and scrap of paper. "Here." I say, holding the paper out to Laura. "This is my number. Please just let me know when you know she's safe." I say, practically begging her to take my number. She sighs but takes it with a nod of her head.

I watch as she walks away then turn to Danny. "What do we do? What if she's hurt?" I agonise. "There's not much we can do at the moment. She's not been gone long enough for a missing person's report. As annoying as it is, Mr Woodstock is right. It's still early and she may just be out and about. It seems like she avoids being here as much as she can anyway." He logically explains. "I want to stay here." I tell Danny who looks at me shocked. "I just want to make sure she gets home. I won't bother her." I tell him and he nods. "I'll stay with you. If she's not back home by midnight I can contact a friend at the NYPD." He offers and I pull him into a grateful hug.

So, that's what we do. I send my driver home and Danny and I sit in his car, our eyes on the group home, waiting for Y/n to come home. The closer it gets to midnight, the more worry I feel. I keep checking my phone to see if Laura has texted me but nothing.

It's 11:45 and I see a dark shadow getting closer to the house. "Is that her?" I ask. Although I've seen pictures of her, Danny is the only one to have met her face to face. He looks up and nods. I start to cry when I see her dejected form. Her head hanging low, he clothes soaked through from the rain. I reach for the door handle, but before I touch it, Danny stops me. "Don't Scarlett. We'll come by tomorrow and see if she'll meet you. But it's late and this is highly inappropriate." He tells me. Every part of my body wants to ignore him and go to her. To apologise profusely. But my head tells me that he's right. I want to do this the proper way.

He drives me home and Colin is waiting at the door for me. I practically fall into his arms sobbing. "I'll come by tomorrow. I'll have the full report ready for you and we'll go through it together. Then we'll head to the group home and see if she'd be willing to meet you." Danny says as I enter the house. "Thank you. I appreciate everything you're doing." I tell him honestly. I don't know what I would have done without him!

I don't sleep much at all that night. Every time sleep approached, I would remember that I let her down twice now. That I don't deserve to have the chance to have her in my life. But I know that I will do everything in my power to make sure that she is. It's selfish, but I want to give her the life she deserves. The one that I should have given her when she was born.

When morning eventually comes round, Colin gets up with me to make me eat something for breakfast. He had dropped the kids around my mom's house last night so we could have the time to sort everything out. My mom was more than happy to help. She's so excited that Y/n might be a part of our lives again.

At 10am, Danny arrives and comes in with a file in hand. My heart rate picks up as I know we're about to get a much clearer story of what Y/n's life has been like. He takes a seat, and I instantly can tell that whatever is in that file isn't good. Danny wouldn't be a good poker player, that's for sure. "Ok. So, I've done some in depth research into Y/n's life and I believe that I have a much clearer picture of things. But I must warn you that some of this may not be easy listening." He isn't one to beat around the bush, but hearing those words makes my breathing hitch.

"Y/n was adopted by Phil and Katie Y/l/n. They lived in Brooklyn the whole time. I have spoken with her schools and was able to get a better picture of her life. She didn't do any after school clubs and was very isolated. She would rush to get home each day and often would worry if she was late. She did raise concerns with two of her teachers when she was 11, but both teachers deemed that she was over-reacting." He starts off, placing school reports out in front of us. "What were the concerns?" I ask, a fire building within. "In the report, she said her parents were mean and weren't nice to her. They directly quoted her. They note a couple of bruises but claim they could have been from anything." Danny explains, a frown on his own face.

"The school reports after these days show that Y/n became more secluded and insular. However, she was at an underfunded school that didn't have the resources to be able to support her. She effectively gets lost in the system." Danny shares. I squeeze Colin's hand tighter, needing any comfort that I could get. "I also have her hospital records." Danny starts and I hear the hesitation in his voice. "She was admitted on a number of occasions for injuries ranging from broken bones to lacerations. On her 10th visit, one of the doctors referred her back to the social worker with concerns of abuse. However, it seems like this went no further than that." Danny shares, with a look of pity on his face.

"This is where things get a bit more difficult." He starts. "More difficult than the fact that it seems like my daughter was in an abusive home yet was failed by both the educational and social systems?" I snap. How could this get any worse? "It seems that Y/n's social worker arranged the adoption with her parents and then moved her into this particular group home once they passed. It's actually outside of Y/n's school district so wouldn't be a suitable placement. On further investigation, I have the belief that they were working to take money from the state through the adoption and fostering of Y/n." His explanation shows how she was only seen a pawn in their game for a quick buck.

"I've contacted the NYPD and given them all the evidence that I have, and they are going to start an investigation. However, until they have more concrete evidence, they won't be able to move Y/n or any of the children from Mr Woodstock's care. It could take a couple of weeks and from there she would then be moved to another care home." He informs us. I'm glad that they are being investigated, but it's not quick enough. I need her to be safe now.

"Can we take her in? She's my daughter after all." I ask, but the drop of Danny's gaze makes me fear his answer. "That is where things get a bit tricky. When you put Y/n up for adoption, you signed away your parental rights. You would have to get approved to be a foster carer first and then have to go through the courts to adopt Y/n. Through all of this Y/n would have to consent as she's 16." He explains. "Well, can we get an application started so we can at least start that process? We can then work towards adoption." Colin steps in and I smile at his confidence and commitment.

"Of course, if that's what you both want. We may be able to petition the state to speed the process along as you are her birth mother. But you'd have to go before a judge." Danny responds. "Do it. I will do whatever I have to do to get her back in our lives." I tell Danny firmly. "Do you agree Colin?" He asks, moving his gaze to my husband. "I 100% support Scarlett. We discussed this when she wanted to approach Y/n. The end goal was always to have her back with us." He says with a smile, leaning down to place a kiss to my head. "Ok, well I'll start the petition later today." Danny smiles, taking a note in his pad in front of him.

"Can we still go and visit her this afternoon?" I ask, unsure if it's still the right thing to do. "We can try, but it's important that we do this all on Y/n's terms. She's not had any adults in her life support her like she has needed. She has been failed on a number of occasions and we need to make sure she is comfortable before proceeding." Danny tells me. "Of course. I only want what's best for her." I respond.

"Ok. Well, I'll call My Woodstock and arrange a meeting this afternoon. In the meantime, I can leave her file with you if you'd like to read more. But please read it with care. There is a lot in there that isn't an easy read." He says whilst gathering his things. "I'll call you when I have a time to go and see her." He says, hugging us goodbye and heading out.

Colin and I take the time to read through the file. Danny was right, it was certainly not an easy read. With each page my heart broke even more. She had been through so much. She is 16 and never experienced a loving home. "I failed her." I whisper as I finish reading over her hospital record detailing each injury she had treated. It makes me wonder how many times she was hurt and they didn't take her to the hospital. "You didn't fail her Scarlett." Colin tries to defend but I shake my head.

"If I kept her, she wouldn't have gone to those monsters. She would have been loved. I was so selfish, putting myself and my career first. My parents offered to help and yet I didn't want the inconvenience." I start to cry as I fall into Colin's hold. "But you thought that she was going to go to a loving home. You had no control over that. She was used by a sick person in power. You had no way of knowing that. You trusted that the state would take care of her, but they are the ones that truly failed her." He tells me with conviction. "But." "No buts. Yes, yesterday could have gone better. But we'll go and see her today and start to make things right. We'll show her that we want to give her a home that she is worthy of. A family that loves her." He reassures me.

I couldn't be more grateful for this man. He has been so supportive through it all. I was terrified when I told him about Y/n. Worried that he might leave me, but he didn't. He asked me what I wanted and has been by my side ever since. I'm lucky to have him in my life.

Danny calls to confirm that we're heading over at 3pm. He's asked Mr Woodstock to not tell Y/n in fear she'll leave the home knowing that we're going. We meet Danny there a little before 3 and Colin says that he'll wait in the car until he's needed. I'm really nervous as I start walking towards the house. I have to fight the anger that is building when I think about the life Y/n has here and that Mr Woodstock isn't innocent in it all. But I need to keep my cool so I can keep Y/n safe.

We're guided through into an office space with a sofa and Mr Woodstock asks one of the girls to go and get Y/n. We take a seat and I'm sure I can feel my heart about to beat out of my chest. I'm actually about to meet my daughter. The next couple of minutes seems to drag by as Mr Woodstock tries to make small talk. Thankfully, there is finally a knock at the door and my head shoots up to look.

The door slowly creaks open, and I see Y/n walk in with her head down. "You asked to see me Mr Woodstock." Her voice is hoarse like she's been crying, and she hasn't even noticed anyone else is in the room. "Y/n we have guests. Please don't be rude and look up." Mr Woodstock exhales in frustration.

As she lifts her head her eyes land on me, and I see a sadness flash through them. That's until I see the dark bruising forming around her eye. I go to stand up but Danny places a hand on my knee. I then go to ask what happened, but Mr Woodstock is quickly out of his seat. I see Y/n flinch as he approaches her. "I thought I told you to cover that up." He hisses at her. "I'm sorry Sir. I didn't know you had guests." She quivered.

It is taking everything in me to not stand up and punch that asshole. I can see that Y/n is clearly fearful of him. Was he the one that did that to her?! "Well, it's too late now. Come in and see your visitors. I'll be in the living room." He says, marching out of the room, leaving Y/n stood with a slight shake to her body. I just want to engulf her in a hug and tell her that she's safe and that I'll never let anyone hurt her again. "I'm not sure if you remember me but we meet a few days ago." Danny starts calmly. "I remember you Mr Osborne." She speaks politely, though her gaze is fixated on her hands. "Please, call me Danny." He tells her with a smile. "Why don't you come and sit with us." He encourages her, holding his hand to point to the empty chair opposite us.

She slowly makes her way to the chair and takes a seat. "I would like to introduce you to Scarlett. She is your biological mother." Danny says, turning to me. Y/n doesn't look up and my smile falters. "Hi Y/n. It's an honour to meet you." I tell her, fighting back tears. I never thought I would find my daughter in a state like this. So, broken. But when I look at her, I see myself in her. She's got brown hair, but her facial features are just like mine.

"I am so sorry that I was late to meet you yesterday. I got held up at work and I didn't have a number to get hold of you with." I try to explain but her gaze doesn't move. "I went to the café, but the owner said that you had already left. So, I came here but you hadn't come back yet. I really am sorry. I never meant to leave you on your own. I was looking forward to seeing you more than anything. Please believe that." I practically beg her.

Her head slowly lifts, and she makes direct eye contact for me for the first time since she came in here. "It's ok. I'm used to being let down." She mumbles. "It's not ok Y/n. I made a promise to meet you and I was so excited. I should have done more to let you know that I was running late. I hope that you could maybe let me make it up to you." I tell her, wanting her to know that she shouldn't accept being let down. "I'll give you some time. I'll be just outside if you need me." Danny says, standing and leaving us be.

An awkward silence falls over us as I can't stop staring at her black eye. "How did you get that?" I ask her, pointing to her eye. "I fell." She responds bluntly. I don't believe her, but I don't want to push her just yet. Silence falls over us again whilst I think about what I want to say. "It was the biggest mistake. Giving you up." I tell her and that seems to get her attention. "Then why did you?" She asks, hurt evident across her face.

I sit forward so that our knees are almost touching. "I thought I was doing the right thing. I was 22 and my career was taking off. I made a selfish decision. But I soon realised the mistake I made, but I couldn't change it. I had signed away my parental rights." I explain, embarrassed by admitting my failings. "I couldn't contact you until you turned 18 or you contacted me. So, I just had to wait. But when your parents passed and you were returned to the care system, I was able to contact you directly." I explain how I was able to finally get in touch.

"I know that it may not seem like it after giving you up and missing our meeting yesterday, but I really want to get to know you Y/n. To have you in my life. My husband can't wait to meet you either." I tell her with a chuckle. But those words seem to do the opposite of what I hoped. "You have two children?" She asks me. "Well, I have three including you." I respond, trying to keep my smile on my face. "But you have two others that live with you." She clarifies and I nod. "You already have your family. I'm just a stranger." She sniffles.

I reach out and take her hand in mine. The flinch making my heart break even more. "No. You are the missing piece. You are my family. I may be a stranger to you, but I have spent every day loving you. Wishing that I had made a different decision all those years ago. I would wonder what you were doing and what you wanted to be when you grew up. I wondered if you liked sports and what type of music you liked. You were always on my mind." I tell her truthfully. "When I had Rose and Cosmo, it was a bittersweet moment. Each time it reminded me of the mistake I had made. That I could have had you in my life too. Being part of my family." I add on.

"Who's my father?" She asks, a question that I was expecting to come at some point. I look down a little ashamed. "I don't know. It was a one night stand. I didn't know his name." I admit. When I lift my gaze, I see hers already on me, studying me. "What is it you want from me?" She asks, almost with an annoyance to her voice. "Truthfully?" I ask her and she nods. "I would love to have a chance to be your mother. But I understand that you may not have the same desire." I tell her, feeling sick at the thought that she may never want to see me again.

"What do you want from all of this?" I ask her, turning the question back around. She sighs and rubs at her forehead as she formulates a response. "I have no idea." She chuckles lightly. "I never expected this to happen. It's all just a bit much." She admits and I nod understanding that this must all be overwhelming to her. "Would you want to be a part of my life?" I ask her tentatively, scared of what her response might be. "I really don't know Scarlett. I don't know you and although you say you love me, you don't know me either." She responds and I smile at her maturity.

"Then let's get to know each other. Spend time together. You can meet Colin and the kids. There would be no pressure on you at all. If this is something you don't want, then we can stop. As much as that would hurt, what is important is what you want." I share so she can see she has the control. "What would you tell your kids?" She asks. "I'd love to tell them the truth. But for now, if you're not comfortable with that, we can just say you're a friend and go from there." I offer up. There's a pause and silence falls once again as she thinks of her response. I feel like I'm holding my breath the whole time. "Ok. I think I'd like to get to know you. But..." My smile grows impossibly wide at her words, though it feels like my heart stops at the word but. "Please don't let me down again." She whispers, her whole body deflating.

I instantly give her hand a squeeze to gain her attention. "Hey. Listen to me." I say softly as I reach forward to wipe the tears falling down her cheeks. "I promise that you will come first. I will be here every step of the way. I will not let you down again. I just want you to be safe and happy." I tell her through my own tears. She only nods in return and I lean forward to pull her into a hug. She tenses initially but soon melts into it.

After we both calm down a little, I sit back and my gaze lands on her black eye once again. "Now can you tell me how you really got that?" I ask her and I see her tense once again. "I told you..." She starts but I quickly shake my head and step in. "I know that you didn't fall. Did Mr Woodstock do that to you?" I ask her cautiously. Her head drops but the small nod of confirmation doesn't go unnoticed. My breathing hitches at the thought and I feel anger rush through me. "Why?" I ask slightly more harshly than I intended.

When she doesn't answer, I reach out and take her hand, slowly rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. "He was mad that I was late home and that you and Danny came looking for me when he was drunk." She explains. "Is this the first time that he's done something like this? Are you safe here?" I question her, terrified of what she's going to say. The shake of her head shatters my already broken heart.

I wrap my arms around her trying to provide her any comfort that I can. "I promise you that I will keep you safe. I won't let him lay another finger on you." I promise her whilst gently rubbing my hands up and down her back. After a while, I go and let Danny in. Y/n explains what happened to her and Danny is straight onto the phone to the Police and Social Services.

As the police car arrives, I see Colin's face appear at the door, worry etched across it. "I'll be right back." I tell Y/n as she is with Danny and the police. I greet Colin and fall into his arms. He holds me tight and places a kiss against my head. "I saw the police and got worried. Is that her?" He asks, nodding his head behind me. I turn and smile when I see her. "Yeah. That's her." I confirm. "What happened to her face?" He asks and my body deflates. "Oh Scar." He says when the realisation hits him.

The police arrest Mr Woodstock after some of the other kids admitted that he had also hurt them. When social services arrived, Danny made sure to make them aware of the impending investigation onto Harry Lycett who was Y/n's social worker. He then returns to Colin and me. "What happens now?" I ask him. "They're arranging for temporary placements for the kids for the foreseeable future." He replies. "What about Y/n?" I ask, worried that I'm going to miss my chance. "She'll be found a foster home for the time being." He responds. "Can't she come with us?" I ask him in a panic.

Colin agrees with me as Danny sighs. "I'm not sure if that's possible. It's a Saturday and I won't be able to get in front of judge until Monday at the earliest." He shares sadly. He looks between Colin and I and sighs once again. "Give me a minute." He says, before heading towards one of the social workers.

We both wait anxiously for Danny to return. We watch him talk with the social worker who then makes a phone call. Eventually, he starts to make his way back over towards us and I can't tell what he's feeling. "Ok. I've spoken with the social worker and explained the situation. They have agreed to you having custody until Monday. After that, it'll be down to the judge to decide." He says and I let out a little squeal. "Scarlett don't get your hopes up. This could all be temporary." Danny tells me with a stern voice. "I know. But I have a chance. That's all I need." I respond with a smile. "Do you want to meet her?" I turn to face Colin and see his smile grow. He nods and I take his hand, walking back towards the office.

Y/n is sat in a chair on her own, fear across her face as she awaits her fate, her focus on fiddling with the hem of her shirt. This has been an overwhelming day for her. She's had to explain to the police what she's been through and now she's about to find out she's moving again. I take the seat next to her and Colin sits opposite. "Y/n, I'd like you to meet my husband, Colin." I introduce them. "Colin, this is my daughter Y/n." I say with a smile. I notice Y/n's head snap to look at me when I refer to her as my daughter and I see a slight tug at her lips. "It's lovely to meet you Y/n." Colin greets, holding his hand out.

Y/n takes it and gives it a firm shake. "You too Colin." She smiles. We chat for a little before Y/n turns to Danny, who's stood in the doorway. "What happens now?" She asks. Danny looks to me and nods, so I turn to fully face Y/n. "Social Services are closing the group home and finding alternative homes for everyone. Danny has spoken with the social workers, and they have agreed that you can stay with us this weekend until we're able to get our official fostering status." I explain, almost holding my breath as I wait for her response.

"Why are you getting your fosters license?" She asks. "Well, if things go well, we'd like to official adopt you. But we'd have to foster you first before the adoption could be processed." Colin steps in to show that he is just as involved in this decision as I am. "Wait, what?" She asks shocked. "I meant what I said Y/n. I want to be a mother to you. But if that's not what you want, then we can just foster you until you find an alternative home." I assure her, still hating the thought that she won't want to be a part of our family. "So, what do you say? Do you want to come home with us, and we can take it one day at a time?" I ask her with a shake to my voice.

It feels like time stops as I look at Y/n waiting for her to answer. My focus is on the 16 year old who's life has just been turned upside down, again. Internally, I'm begging that she's going to say yes. That I'll get a chance to give her the loving home that she deserves. After what seems like hours Y/n looks up to me opening her mouth. "Scarlett I...."

Part 2

[earthstellar]

just thinking about how fucked it is in TFP that June is unaware that Jack escaped the attack on the base for a decent period of time

so like for at least a few days, she is fully fighting off the despair of the very real possibility that her only child has been ground into human paté by an evil space robot warlord who is actively (and thus far, mostly successfully) attempting to violently take over the planet

yeah Fowler is there but I cannot imagine the amount of government shit he was buried under the entire time

she would have to cope those few days (longer than a week? can't rewatch atm to establish any rough timeline) of just thinking "my son was the first human casualty of an impossible war against giant mechanical alien invaders"

if she believed him dead, if her hope slipped for just a moment, the mental gymnastics needed to cope, even if just to assist Fowler the best she could, would be devastating-- the hospital is gone, the town has been evacuated, has anyone else been killed? is it just Jack? what about the other kids?

it would be easy to start thinking down a dark path, and I think Fowler kept June around instead of evacuating her because not only is there no way she would go, but because he realises that she very seriously may have just lost her son. she needs distractions, support, someone at least somewhat familiar, a sense that her input is needed and will be genuinely considered in order to gain any semblance of control over a situation that just took her son away from her. either for now, or forever.

realistically, Fowler is military, and could have forced her to leave. but he didn't. there are pros and cons to that approach, but given the circumstances, it was almost certainly the right call. good guy Fowler!!

Fowler knew Jack. Fowler did his best to keep them safe on base. She doesn't blame him. He might struggle with some guilt himself, though.

There's no blame, really; What can anyone do when giants from the sky descend and touch the Earth with pointed metal claws, raking at the ground and the people on it, like pulling weeds to clear the land for purposes beyond them?

the situation in general may have been so overwhelming, and both June and Fowler are fairly stubborn, that combined with their need for proof before mourning all of the general stress may have been enough of an active focus to keep them going

but there is no way June didn't have a complete fucking breakdown over the possibility of Jack's death at some point during all this

which is why I can sort of accept Jack's dumbass move of trying to call her

given how anxious we see her on screen most of the time when it comes to the kids (and not unreasonably so), and how little we know about the Darby family history, we can assume Jack could easily imagine how distraught his mother might be

that's a lot of emotional stress to place on a teenager who almost got extremely killed not too long ago and is currently on the run

so yes, it was a bad call (literally), but one that is totally understandable. I would expect a teenager with a close and generally positive relationship with their parent to want that parent to know they aren't dead, that there's still hope, that they're ok.

it's easy to shit on Jack for making the call when he did, but realistically, he's a teenager and real serious shit is happening and there are emotions and worry and who knows, the deceptions might get him soon anyway. it's hard to stay hopeful. and his mother is really the only relation he's got, in terms of direct family, that we ever see or hear about.

he had the opportunity to risk a final call before things may have gotten even worse no matter what, regardless of anything, and he took that chance to call his mom.

I can understand that, even if it was a dipshit move given the risks. Not a great idea, but a totally understandable one.

they couldn't play up any of this on screen for obvious reasons, not just time constraints, but because this is heavy shit for a show aimed ostensibly at a majority youth demographic, and it's understandable that they didn't focus too much on the darker aspects of this whole arc

but still, it reminds me a lot of what it's like after a bad hurricane. lots of people who are missing family members, no homes to go back to, lots of confusion and injury with no communication, it sucks. the destruction of Jasper definitely has that vibe.

I'm willing to bet June, at some point, was crying in the shower of some military temporary barracks or even shitty FEMA accomodation (I hate those fucking trailers, I've had to deal with them myself) thinking "my son is dead" over and over in a moment of despair, until walking out and thinking to herself, "he's not dead until we know he's dead" (even if she increasingly struggles to hold on to hope) and putting her clothes back on--

--they might be dirty, and Fowler may have offered some spare uniforms for her to wear from whatever soldier gear they might have had peppered around-- but Jack would recognise her scrubs, so she put them back on no matter how gross they felt

and just doing whatever she could to back up Fowler when dealing with his superiors, anything she could think about or do or focus on

either to find her son, or confirm that he had died

just really grim

anyway my break's over! back to work