#everyone i know seems to hate jury duty
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i have been summoned for jury duty this coming week and i’m pretty hyped about doling out some justice.
#everyone i know seems to hate jury duty#but i'm excited to do my civic duty#at some point this week i may determine a man/woman's fate#i will be partaking in a tradition that goes all the way back to my ancient and noble ancestors#this is what the kids call#retvrning to tradition#right?
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-- Anything in parentheses (abc) feel free to delete!
-- Anything in square brackets [abc] feel free to change!
-- This is a long post, so please remember to tag “long post tw” or some kind of varient of the sort so you don’t clog mobile users dashes/people who don’t have “shorten posts.” turned on! :D
“Doesn't this seem like a bit much?”
“This is what Christmas is all about! Can't you feel it?”
“You guys, where are we? I think we should go back.”
“Serves them right, those Yuletide-loving sickly-sweet, nog-sucking cheer mongers!”
“I really don't like them. No, I don't.”
“I've been much too tolerant of these (Whovenile) delinquents and their innocent, victimless pranks.”
“So, they want to get to know me, do they?”
“I guess I could use a little social interaction.”
“Yeah, you bet. Ho, ho, ho, and stuff…”
“You see, [name]? The city is a dangerous place.”
“Now, please, don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.”
“Well, it's just, I look around at you and [Mom] and everyone getting all kerbobbled. Doesn't this seem...superfluous?”
“I think they were up on the mountain playing with matches, or defacing public property, or....”
“Take a look at his mailbox, (sweetie). Not a single Christmas card, in or out… Ever!”
“And for the rest of you: Jury duty! Jury duty! Jury duty! Blackmail. Pink slip. Chain letter. Eviction notice. Jury duty!”
“Well, that worked out nicely.”
“[Max], let's go. Our work here is finished.”
“Don't you know you shouldn't take things that don't belong to you? What's your problem? Are you a wild animal?”
“Saving you? Is that what you think I was doing? Wrong-o.”
“You've been practicing your Christmas wrapping! I am so proud of you.”
“My, I've never seen so many beautiful Christmas lights, [Betty Lou!]”
“It's handcrafted and almost 100 years old.”
“Come on, hurry up, Slowpoke.”
“What's that stench? It's fantastic!”
“One man's toxic sludge is another man's potpourri.”
“Did Christmas change or just me?"
“First floor, factory rejects.”
“But we did our worst. And that's all that matters.”
“At least I scared the bejeebles out of that little [girl] at the post office. [She]'ll be scarred for life, if we're lucky.”
“Funny she didn't rat on us, though. Must be afraid of reprisals.”
“If you utter so much as one syllable I'll hunt you down and gut you like a fish!”
“I've got all the company I need right here.”
“I'm an idiot!”
“You're an idiot!”
“Am I just eating because I'm bored?”
“In your own words, please tell me everything you know about [the Grinch.]”
“Hey, honey, our baby is here! He looks just like your boss.”
“It was Christmas Eve, and a strange wind blew that night.”
“Do you want a Christmas cookie?”
“Don't forget, tomorrow is our big Christmas gift exchange.Everyone bring a special gift for a special someone.”
“You don't have a chance with [her].”
“It was a horrible day when they were so cruel to [him]. And I could hardly bear it.”
“And that was the last time we ever saw [him]. The very last time.”
“I hate you.Hate, hate, hate. Hate, hate, hate. Double hate. Loathe entirely!”
“Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!”
“I may do something drastic.”
“You made that up! It doesn't say that.”
“But the book does say: The cheer-meister is the one who deserves a back slap or a toast. And it goes to the soul at Christmas who needs it most."
“Blast this Christmas music. It's joyful and triumphant.”
“The impudence! The audacity! The unmitigated gall!”
“You called down the thunder now, get ready for the boom!”
“Gaze into the face of fear!”
“You see? Even now the terror is welling up inside you.”
“Run for your life before I kill again!”
“Maybe you need a time-out.”
“Kids today. So desensitized by movies and television.”
“"Holiday Whobie-what-y"?”
“I know you hate Christmas, but what if it's all just a misunderstanding?”
“I myself am having some Yuletide doubts.”
“Award? You never mentioned an award!”
“Was anyone emotionally shattered?”
“Come on, a minute ago I couldn't shut you up! Details, details!”
“I don't know if it's that adorable twinkle in your eye or that nonconformist streak that reminds me of a younger, less hairy me.”
“Who knows? This Whobilation could change my entire outlook on life!”
“You can make snow angels later.”
“The nerve of those (Whos). Inviting me down there on such short notice. Even if I wanted to go, my schedule wouldn't allow it.”
“4:00, wallow in self-pity. 4:30, stare into the abyss. 5:00, solve world hunger tell no one. 5:30, jazzercise. 6:30, dinner with me… I can't cancel that again. 7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing… I'm booked! If I bumped the loathing to 9:00, I'd have time to lay in bed stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness.”
“It's not a dress, it's a kilt! Sicko!”
“This is ridiculous. If I can't find something nice to wear, I'm not going! That's it, I'm not going.”
“Ohh, ahh, mmm… That's it, I'm not going.”
“[He] isn't here. What? [He] didn't show? Who could have predicted this?
“All right. I'll swing by for a minute, allow them to envy me grab a handful of popcorn shrimp, and blow out of there.”
“But what if it's a cruel prank? What if it's a cash bar? How dare they!”
“All right, I'll go. But I'll be fashionably late.”
“All right. I've made my decision! I'm going, and that's that!”
“Come on, while I'm young!”
“But first, a little family reunion.”
“Are you two still living?”
“Sweater? What are you talkin' about? No, I can't! I can't do that!”
“No. I can't do it, honestly. I'm not ready. It's too much, too soon!”
“I've got a lawyer. There'll be hell to pay!”
“Look at the time. I really should be getting back.”
“Bring it on! Is that all you got? Is that all you got? Come on!”
“That's what it's all about, isn't it? That's what it's always been about!”
“Look, I don't want to make waves, but this whole Christmas season is stupid, stupid, stupid!”
“There is, however one teeny-tiny Christmas tradition I find quite meaningful. Mistletoe.”
“Burn, baby! Burn!”
“Evening, folks. Mind if I ride along? You might want to scooch over.”
“You fellas all right? How about a nice hat?”
“I'm hurt, [Lou]. I'm hurt, and I don't hurt easily.”
“But you and your family.... I'm so disappointed.”
“I just wanted everybody to be together for Christmas.”
“Suffering snorkelblatz! They're relentless!”
“Oh, no. I'm speaking in rhyme!”
“I must stop this whole thing. Why for year after year I've put up with it now.”
“Are you having a holly, jolly Christmas? Wrong-o!”
“If you're not going to help me then you might as well…”
“You're as cuddly as a cactus and as charming as an eel.”
“Just face the music, you're a monster.”
“Your heart's an empty hole.”
“I asked for three-quarters, not five-eighths. Stay focused!”
“Air bag is a little slow. But that's what these tests are for!”
“Talk about a recluse. He only comes out once a year, and he never catches any flak for it!”
“Probably lives up there to avoid the taxes.”
“No, forget that part. We'll improvise.”
“Saving Christmas was a lousy ending. Way too commercial.”
“We're gonna die! We're gonna die! I'm going to throw up, and then I'm gonna die!”
“[Mommy], tell it to stop!”
“Almost lost my cool there.”
“It's Santa! Go right back to sleep.”
“[He]'s planning a double-twisting interrupted forward-flying 2-and-a-half with a combo tuck and pike. High degree of difficulty.”
“Blasted water weight! Goes right to my hips.”
“Okay, fellas. Show time.”
“[Mr. Santa], what are you doing with our tree?”
“[Santa], what's Christmas really about?”
“I know [he]'s mean and hairy and smelly. [His] hands might be cold and clammy. But I think [he]'s actually kind of sweet.”
“Nice kid. Bad judge of character.”
“Clearance sale. Everything must go.”
“That wasn't so bad, was it, [Max]?”
“What an embarrassment! I've been robbed!”
“I wonder who could have done this.”
“But did anyone listen to me? No.”
“[Cindy], I hope you're very proud of what you've done.”
“You're glad. You're glad everything is gone. You're glad that [the Grinch] virtually wrecked.... No, not wrecked, pulverized Christmas. Is that what I'm hearing?”
“You can't hurt Christmas, [Mr. Mayor], because it isn't about the gifts or the contests or the fancy lights. That's what [Cindy]'s been trying to tell everyone! And me. [She]'s been trying to tell me.”
“What's wrong with you? This is a child!”
“[She]'s my child. And she happens to be right, by the way.”
“I don't need anything more for Christmas than this right here, my family!”
“Now for the final note in my symphony of downright nasty not-niceness! The crescendo of my odious opus! The wailing and the gnashing of teeth. The bellowing of the bitterly bummed out! It'll be like music to my ears!”
“Somehow or other, it came Just the same!”
“How could it be so? It came without ribbons! It came without tags! It came without packages, boxes or bags!”
“Maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”
“Help me! I'm feeling!”
“What's happening to me? I'm all toasty inside. And I'm leaking?”
“All right, that's enough! Knock it off! beat it! Get out of here! One step at a time!
“Wait! This can't happen! It shouldn't! It couldn't! It mustn't! It wouldn't! Not now, not then, not ever again!”
“What are you doing up there!?”
“I came to see you. No one should be alone on Christmas.”
“I got you, [Cindy Lou]!”
“Are you kiddin'? The sun is bright and the powder's bitchin'!”
“Now scoot over! It's my turn to drive!”
“Now you listen to me, [young] [lady]! Even if we're horribly mangled there'll be no sad faces on Christmas.”
“By the way, these lights match your outfit perfectly.”
“This could be more difficult to negotiate.”
“Out of the way! I have no insurance!”
“Run for your lives! Watch out, I can't stop!”
“Aren't you gonna cuff me? Put me in a choke hold? Blind me with pepper spray?”
“Sorry but my heart belongs to someone else.”
“Cheer up, dude. It's Christmas.”
“There's nothin' like the holidays.”
“Too late! That'll be mine.”
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IT'S NOT TRUE
AGH
i really haven't had such a visceral reaction to a show like this in such a long time. the dread i felt as utena ascended the stairs to the arena was like a lodestone in the pit of my stomach, drawing in all my fears for the fragile peace utena had seemed to reach with anthy.
there's hardly anything else to talk about besides that moment in their dorm, the duel, and its aftermath. everything has gone according to touga's plan, which unveils itself not just as a material ambition, but a philosophy: "deep feelings will inevitably betray you, as deeply as you feel them." even the walled-off juri is taken aback, stunned by the coldness of touga's will. miki criticizes touga's treatment of nanami, comparing his "care" for her to be no more compassionate than how he would view a pet. touga doesn't argue, instead claiming that any victim who falls into a trap has only themselves to blame, nanami included. as was inevitable, her feelings for her brother betrayed her.
and so too do anthy's feelings betray her. whether she has finally let the mask slip and acknowledge her enjoyment of others' company, or whether she's become too method in her role as utena's bride, touga brings it all crashing down. she's forgotten her place - her role is not to cook and make friends, her role is to tend the roses in her cage. touga understands this, and in his way is the ideal husband, just as every partner for the rose bride must be the ideal partner by nature of winning her hand. it's crushing to see anthy visibly dissociate here, and even more so when utena rushes to protect her, still not understanding the rules of the engagement. "tell him you hate being the rose bride," she shouts, and anthy does. "i hate being the rose bride." touga laughs. he knows the truth.
secure in that knowledge, he continues to cast his spell on utena, who has been worn down like stone beneath the tide. the mystery seems solved: everyone at school agrees touga is a prince, and touga knows intimate details of utena's fateful meeting without even needing to deceive her. the conditioning is set - when utena sees him across the campus, sound dissipates, and it seems they only have eyes for each other. how unfortunate that touga's student council duties oblige him to challenge her to a duel. only a matter of principle, it seems.
back at the dorm, utena and anthy fondly remember their lunch with wakaba, who, even if she resists anthy as competition for utena's love, is at least kind enough to accept her (unlike basically everyone else in the school). then, something monumental happens. like utena, i believe that anthy is being genuine when she says she wishes she had more friends. it's such a vulnerable thing to say, particularly in this environment where most of the people she knows treat her like an object. furthermore, utena is largely a stranger to her - even as they've been living together, anthy still has to pretend to be someone around her, specifically her doting fiancee. and as good as utena's intentions seem to be, she still has hurt anthy in the past. it must take so much for anthy to step out of her role as rose bride - after all, everything that happens to the rose bride isn't really happening to her. the rose bride is someone else, a mask. to put that away, not for something fun like a picnic lunch with friends or cooking a meal, but to voice her distress? and hope that it's heard? almost unfathomable, and yet, human. fortunately, she has her prince. utena is immediately there for her, cheering her on and promising to support her. they've finally crossed that bridge together, and they face each other now, a promise renewed.
AGH
my fears began just before utena opened the way to the forest. as she walks, she thinks to herself, "that's right. i have to protect anthy." a noble enough sentiment from a prince, defending a friend in need. then:
"i won't give her to the others."
she's not yours!!!!!!!!!!
in this moment, utena loses sight. as chivalrous as her intentions are, she steps alongside saionji and miki in the desire to possess anthy, and in so doing forgets her love. why does this happen? perhaps touga's manipulation has stirred her blood, and her conflicted feelings for him and anthy led her towards hot-headedness over her inner strength and honor. as always, utena has good intentions. and as often happens, they lead her astray. as fearful as i was of touga's scheme, this was the moment i truly began to doubt.
utena ascends the stairs, and anthy is waiting for her - not in the rose bride's neutral position, but nearby, with arm extended. they touch hands and exchange smiles. all is well.
touga draws his sword. "i must take your bird from you," he says regretfully, and the duel begins. utena fights as passionately as ever, while touga fights in a tall, overbearing, and composed stance. like juri, his movements are refined, yet he also focuses his aggression into singular, precise, deadly strikes. his dueling is proud and calculated - he is in control, simply awaiting the arrival of the prince and the power of dios. the prince descends, and touga readies himself. as utena charges for her signature final blow, he gently lowers his sword. and utena, who swore to not let even her prince take anthy away, falters. unable to attack her prince, she falls, and in a single upward slash, touga cuts her rose.
it's over. like saionji, like nanami, utena cannot accept this and calls out to anthy, but touga breaks the spell once and for all. it was all part of the game, he reveals. anthy's behavior was simply her playing the role utena wanted of her. this is the painful thought that has occupied me throughout each episode until this moment - utena, unknowingly, has almost always commanded anthy to act the way utena prefers. she ordered her to wear nanami's dress and attend the ball against her wishes, she told her it isn't right to keep saionji's diary, and she told her to tell touga that she hates being the rose bride. and anthy did all these things. but... she loves being the rose bride, doesn't she? yes, she loves being the rose bride. she likes being alone. and just like that, the anthy of utena's memories, the anthy who smiled, cooked curry, played piano, cared for chuchu, and danced with utena on the night of the ball... vanishes behind the veil of the rose bride.
"cheer up, miss utena."
after each duel, anthy has said something pointed to the defeated duelist - she calls saionji her classmate (rather than her love), offers to study with miki (rather than play the piano), and advises juri to make her feelings known (in spite of juri's rejection of such miracles). and now, facing abandonment by the one person who genuinely swore to protect her and then gave in to the temptation of touga’s false promise of love, she addresses her betrayer. why is this her message to utena? ever since childhood, utena's chivalry, nobility, and all of her princely aspirations have been survival mechanisms - weapons and shields against that which she could not face: her lonely, unrelenting sorrow. now, having failed in her ambitions, she returns to its cold embrace.
and alone, she cries.
stray observations:
first prominent wakaba appearance in a while, and her love for utena seems to have only gotten stronger and more forward. making her lunch is such a romantic gesture, especially in an anime, and she shows notable annoyance when anthy mirrors her. i can't help but feel there's some kind of tension building here, if utena continues to view her as a friend while wakaba seeks romantic love.
another strange silhouette performance, this time about william tell and his son seemingly cursed to repeat their story for eternity. i wonder if the connective theme is something to do with trust: utena trusts in touga and is crushed for it, as william tell's son trusts his father yet may be in danger.
juri and miki openly voice their unrest and concerns about touga's conduct, but seem unable to fully oppose him, perhaps as part of end of the world's hierarchy. as president, he seems unassailable, and now with the power to bring the world revolution, it will be difficult to defeat him. i wonder what nanami will make of this, having been used as a sacrificial pawn for touga's acquisition of anthy, her hated rival.
balloons, huh? at first just red, blue, and orange, the colors of the council members, but then dozens of them in all shades. perhaps a sign of the world revolution?
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Ep 1: the Heirs of the Dragon
Likes:
LOVE the shot of the burnt insides of harrenhal
"That's almost large enough to saddle two" my god these bitches gay
Ser Harold's pearl clutching when he saw Daemon on the throne
Aemma seems so lovely and sensible 😔 girl we are gonna get you out of there and you can stop trying for kids. Her speech about mourning all the dead children she can and failing in her duty to provide an heir 💔💔💔
Lord Lyman saying "Dear me" to Daemons gross rant about Rhea Royce. He's been a real one from day 1. I know a young lord lyman would treat me right.
You can really see the difference in splendour and size between this tourney and the s1 GoT tourney.
Daemons armor looks great. Totally impractical but great.
The crowd booing Daemon for his unsportsmanlike conduct dhalaidjssjsk hes entering his Elon Musk era
Loved Rhaenyra and Alicents little bitchy gossip sesh
Bby Laena gripping Laenors arm when the knight is getting beaten up 💔
The increasing tourney violence juxtaposed with Aemmas increasingly gory birth....
Daemon does have a point. Viserys is weak and I'm kind of happy he pointed that out.
I like that they showed Rhaenys looking a bit (imo) conflicted when Rhaenyra was named heir and the lords swore their pledges. It must've hurt for her.
Dislikes:
Wish we'd seen more of the politicking at the great council :(. Especially the random lesser claimants like Saeras sons and the descendent of Daenys and Gaemon's second daughter who married a petty lord. Also can you imagine seeing Jaehaerys interacting with one of Saeras illegitimate sons? That may well have been what finally sent him off.
Daemon is annoying me. I didn't mind him in the books but this version is actively passing me off. Gotta say beginning his speech with insulting the city watch was funny tho. Having him say "our city should be safe for all its people" after he spent the night being judge jury and executioner was just audacious....so yeah textbook Daemon
Having the gold cloaks just be thugs terrorising the city like??? Why???? AGCAB tho (all gold cloaks are bastards)
WHY are they acting like absolute male preference primogeniture was firmly established by the great council? That happened after the dance my guys. Picking Rhaenyra over Daemon may have been kind of shaky because of the great council of 101 but it could be justified with andal law, or if daemon is so widely distrusted/disliked another great council.
MYSARIAS ACCENT IS ATROCIOUS
Fights to the death being allowed in jousting. It's supposed to be an exercise for wartime not an actual war smh
Im sorry but Caraxes looked like one of the Jurassic park dinosaurs in the scene where Daemon lets Mysaria touch him
Not a fan of the prophecy being used by Viserys but if the dance ends with the prophecy being lost I won't mind it so much
Can they stop having everyone and their mother repeat the lyanna stark promise me line like please
Costuming:
I liked all of Alicents dresses but only Rhaenyras red tourney dress and heir dress. The first yellow/gold Rhaenyra dress was awful.
Rhaenyras heir outfit was *chefs kiss*
I liked Mysarias white dress in the brothel.
Miscellaneous thoughts:
What do dragons smell like if they're that stinky that you smell like them after a ride???
my man Corlys is rolling over in his grave cause one of his descendants is now one of those very pirates beggaring the realm
Interesting having Viserys be cut (or claim to be cut) by the IT in the first ep when it's taken as a sign of being unfit to rule in the books...AND THEN IT CUTS HIM FOR REAL.
"Bad humours of the mind can affect the body" Ok Sygmynd Fraeud
Bro Viserys' dream sounds just straight up like wishful thinking not dragon dreams 😭😭😭
If I were Otto I'd hate Daemon too "don't let him provoke you" like fuck you Viserys he just insulted the man's recently deceased wife
"You are Daemon Targaryen. Rider of Caraxes, wielder of dark sister, sufferer of plot necessary erectile dysfunction"
VISERYS AND MELLOS YOU ARE GOING TO HELL FOR NOT TELLING AEMMA WHAT WAS GOING ON. STRAIGHT DOWNSTAIRS. I WILL DRAG YOU THERE MYSELF.
We deserve a spin off prequel where Daemon slowly works through every small council position and fails miserably while Otto tears out his hair
Otto you are going to hell along with Viserys. Imagine pimping your teenage daughter out to the king in one of her mothers dresses . Imagine not sending your teenage daughters best friend away when her father has placed her in this position. Viserys being this gross when he has a daughter Alicents age is atrocious.
Do they not have seperate rooms in Westerosi brothels?
The guy who paused mid-fuck to listen to Daemons heir for a day speech hdsldjwkajdjs
Daemon trying to play off the heir for a day speech as GRIEVING IN HIS OWN WAY my god
Is it just me or do all the candles around the dragons kind of imply the Targaryens worship them? I like that idea I'm keeping it.
Overall thoughts:
They should have trigger warnings on these episodes for pregnant people cause jesus christ
Viserys really loves threatening to cut people's tongues out eh?
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I write on AO3, but I have no idea what their rules are regarding that sort of thing. I have linked playlists / songs to my fics before, and that didn’t seem to be a problem? There’s always the option of posting it in parts on this site. I don’t personally do that, but my best friend does, and it’s worked out pretty well for him. Regarding the movie, just because of the sheer amount of potential triggers, I might just skim read the wiki. I’m not sure if I’d need more context than that if you decided to add the town to here, but if I did, I could probably just watch clips.
__________
{i am the caretaker of souls} The problem is that I’m old, haha, so I don’t know how to make/share playlists, embarrassingly enough. I used to use 8tracks back in the day but that’s kindof gone the way of the dinosaurs, and I tried to get into Spotify but I honestly hate it. Half the things I look up aren’t there or they have 47 versions except the one I want. So I use YouTube because it’s faster and easier, but that means a separate link for each song in a post or something. That’d be harder to link to AO3. Unless I make a post here and link to that instead? Eh, whatever, I’ll figure it out, or not, heh. The writing is the most important thing anyway.
Definitely only skin the wiki if that’s what you’re comfortable with. That was my point in warning people was to avoid anyone getting triggered. Sometimes I forget that I have a much higher tolerance for horror and a lot of other topics than most people and I don’t have hardly any triggers myself, and then I get excited about something and want to share it with people... forgetting that they really may not be okay with it. I once really badly scared one of my friends by showing them a picture of a horror character that I honestly thought was cute, and I felt absolutely horrible. After that, I try to be responsible in how I share things with others.
As far as you needing more context if I decide to add the town to this blog, nah, you won’t. I’m a very visual person, so for me, seeing the environment and the aesthetic would improve my experience, but not everyone is that way. If anything, it’s my job as the writer to evoke those images in your mind and give you the feel of the town through my writing. If I do add the town, I’ll be writing up an info post that will explain the basics of how the town functions, a little history of how it got to be the way it is, and what muns/muses can expect, so you shouldn’t need any more than that. And in that post I will try to keep it as trigger free as possible.
Right now, it’s probably not a good idea to add the town. Unless I’m going to not write other muses while I work on SH, I don’t have the extra time. If I added it, I’d want to do it well, and doing it to my standards is something I don’t have adequate free time for at the moment. Also, I may be on hiatus for a bit in July. I have the end of summer classes to deal with and then jury duty the week after. If I do get called, I could end up having to sit there 8AM-4PM Mon through Fri, or even be put on a trial. And the hours the courthouse keeps are almost the polar opposite of my schedule. I’ll have to go to bed so early each night to get up like six hours earlier than I usually do, leaving no time for writing. So starting a complex muse right before I got on hiatus potentially for a couple weeks is not ideal. But I may use those two weeks if I do go on hiatus to work on the fanfic, since things are a bit busy right now, so maybe I could set up the town during that time too and then just not post it until I get back.
We’ll see! Things are a bit up in the air until the end of July for me, so I’ll have to play it by ear.
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So since y’all seemed to like Kanej kid, let’s do Zoyalai kid. Also David isn’t dead in this because it is to sad
||ROW SPOILERS||
TW, this has brief mentions of infertility and describes labor, nothing to graphic just talks about how painful it is
After the wedding zoya and Nikolai were both excited to start a family
Nikolai; while he adores his sister Linnea and his father, never really was able to grow up in a loving household
He never wanted that for his children
He and Vasily had a horrible relationship growing up and he wanted to di everything in his power to make sure his kids had a healthy sibling relationship
Zoya on the other hand never really thought she’d have kids
Before everything went down she kinda assumed she’d work as a general and work to help Grisha
She never thought she’d have children
That obviously had to change
The country needed heirs
Zoya already decided that since she was probably gonna live a loooooong time, when her heir came of age she would step down; that way she wouldn’t love for a super long time.
Now that Zoya was gonna have children she wasn’t honestly sure about
What if they hold her back?
What if she gives up to many duties for them?
But higher the all these other worries she didn’t want to turn into her own mother
No matter how much Nikolai assured her that never will happen
Zoya still had worries
Zoya was a lot of things but motherly she was not
Nevertheless in February Zoya and Nikolai told there friends they were expecting
They were all incredibly happy for them
Tamar loved children although she herself didn’t want any and couldn’t wait to teach the kid things like how to ride a horse or shoot
Tolya objected saying the kid should be well educated on poatry and great works that way the Nazyalensky dynasty might be somewhat pious
Genya was hoping for a girl. Genya and David had there son Forrest earlier that year and Genya was already planning play dates
David was happy for his friends and had already started on projects for toys for the kid
When they wrote Mal and Alina they were ecstatic
While Mal gave tips on how to handle babies to Nikolai
Alina with her wiles and years of friendship with Zoya figured out all the way from Keramzin Zoya was worried
She wrote “Zoya babe imma cut to the chase, your nervous, your scared, your probably worried you’ll turn out to be a horrible mother. And imma tell you your not. Cause you’ve got an amazing freaking team. You’ve got Nikolai, Magnus, Linnea, and Genya and David, the twins, and of course myself. There’s no way in hell we’d let you turn out horrible to the kid. We’ve got you”
It helped Zoya a lot
She decided it was orphan wiles that Alina used to diagnose her exact problem from the letter she wrote to her
And Zoya did have wonderful people to help her
She wasn’t alone
Zoya had been trying to remember that more
Three months along Zoya was safely into Trmester two and it was time to tell the public
This was crucial to the monarchy
While zoya and Nikolai were popular
They needed an heir to convive people of the security of the nation
They made a public speech announcing the baby and Ravka went wild
If there’s one thing Ravkans know how to do it’s rally around babies
Letter came pouring in from name suggestions to old wives tales
They said Rosemary made the baby healthier
They said they should name there child Plumje
Well the Plumje comment was from some Kerch girl Zoya found strange but never mind that
The announcement was huge
The people had hope
Hope that wolves wouldn’t come knocking
Hope that there boys and girls wouldn’t be drafted
Hope for peace
While the people rejoiced Zoyas pregnancy was getting tougher
She had a easy enough first trimester but the second? That was rough
The morning sickness was bad
Her Healer; a no nonsense Fjerdan Women said that the vomiting wasn’t something that could be healed
And so Zoya suffered on
Zoya insisted on keeping her normal schedule
Her usual meetings with Grisha and the spy’s
Passive agressive letters to the Kerch
Aggressive aggressive letters to the shu
And trying to figure out whether or not there was a revolution group in the Wandering Isle
Zoyas schedule was already stressed and the baby wasn’t helping
Eventually her healer; Monika, put her foot down
“Your Magesty” She started “if you do not alleviate your stress I guarantee your pregnancy will be worse”
“Look Monika I can handle a little throw up”
Monika and Zoya attended the little palace together
While Monika was a healer and back then the animosity between corporalki and etherealki were high, they were friends
It was good to have a powerful healer in your corner when half the little palace hates you
And it was good to have a powerful squaller in your corner when your Fjerdan and in enemy territory
“Zoya you are endangering your child” Monika stated
By this statement Nikolai had enough
And zoya finally listened
Nikolai assumed some of her duties and Zoya started to feel a bit better
Her second trimester was stressful for there relationship
Nikolai had a hard time understanding zoya
And Zoyas fears started to grow
But they were a good couple
And they worked through tension before
Zoya opened up about her worries of being a competent queen with a child
She leaned on Nikolai more
And they worked together to fix the damage
By the end of her second trimester there relationship was healthier
And they thought the third couldn’t be as bad
In a way they were right
Her morning sickness while still present was significantly less then her second trimester
However I new thing arose
A question that everyone had been thinking
“What if the baby is Grisha?”
The Ravkans had accepted a Grisha queen
But a Grisha dynasty was another thing
Monika told them outright that the baby was probably Grisha
Being Grisha tended to run in families
And Zoya was fairly sure her paternal grandmother was also a squaller
The whole science of Grisha heritage wasn’t studied well
Most Grisha were in Ravka in the second army
And most of the soldiers don’t have children
Zoya also learned her new found ability to sense Grisha wasn’t fool proof
Sometimes she couldn’t tell at all
And in Genyas case of being somewhere between a corporalki and materialki, she couldn’t tell what she was
She also couldn’t sense anything in Forrest Kostyk
That meant they couldn’t rely on Zoyas power
Nikolai couldn’t help but think tracing heritage would be easier if he wasn’t a bastard
His mother’s line was easy
She was a Fjerdan princess so he could trace everything back from the very start
And from his mother not a drop of Grisha blood ran through his veins
His fathers got murky
Magnus didn’t come from nobility
He was self made
A self made orphan
So other then his father neither he nor Magnus knew anything about Grisha influence
Nevertheless they had other worries
Zoya was in her third trimester and was going to give birth any minute now
Zoya honestly didn’t think she would make it this far
And that has nothing to do with her fears of motherhood
Her own mother had four miscarriages
Pregnancy complications were common
Especially in Ravka where most couldn’t afford mediks
But now that the due date was fast approaching Zoya was in fact okay
Zoya can handle pain, she’s handled much worse
Labor was one of the least of her worries
The due date was October eighth
And on time and punctual Zoya went into labor during lunch
Nikolai joked it would be a good trait for a ruler to show up on time
However Zoya was in to much pain to think about a snarky retort
She had vastly underestimated how much this would hurt
The pain was blinding
But Zoya was strong enough to survive the fall
And so in 3:07 PM son October eighth
Prince Mycanae Juris Nazyalensky was born (prounounced My-kuh-nay-uh because I threw some random vowels together and made it a name)
Myca (My Kuh) for short
With a tuft of chocolate brown hair and beautiful hazel eyes he shone
Nikolai absolutely adored him
He would rock him and sing him lullabies
But mostly tell him stories
About the amazing Privateer Sturmhond
Of the allusive Juris
Of the little termite
Zoya in the other hand had a different approach to there newborn
When he first cried she was elated
Zoya didn’t hold back the tears of happiness and didn’t even swear the healers to secrecy after
Zoya was the epitome of
“Oh god it’s a baby, as I holding him wrong? Does he have the right clothes on? He’s so fragile and precious”
Monika had to tell her three times that Myca’s crib was fine for him and it wasn’t to hard
However the family’s elation was short lived
They were a family
But they were also the rulers of Ravka
And Ravka needed to see the face of there hope
Four hours after his birth Nikolai presented him before the nobility
Zoya still wasn’t feeling to great and Nikolai Insisted he could do it
This is what the Ravkans needed
The baby met stability
Met peace
For once in many years the people could lay down in there beds without fear
But to Zoya and Nikolai
There baby wasn’t a political tool
Or a savior
He was just a baby
A perfect
Small
Baby
This is what love does.
Im really proud of myself for accomplishing this. I worked really hard on it and to keep our characters in canon. My ask box is open and n do any Grishaverse asks
If this gets 25 likes I’ll do a part two 😉
I defo think Nikolai and Zoya would have more then one kid
Also I kid you not I couldn’t find any good names for the life of me so I eventually took a break and was doing my History homework when I was reading some old Greek thing and saw the word “Mycenae” and was like “Yeah I can massively mispronounce this and make it a name”
Here is part two https://dablackdahlia.tumblr.com/post/651104016423583744/the-black-dahlia
I also made a Kanej kid one here
#shadow and bone trilogy#dragon zoya#zoya nazyalensky#row spoilers#rule of wolves spoilers#king of scars#zoya x nikolai#nikolai duology#zoyalai#pregnancy#zoya and nikolai#zoya and Nikolai baby fic#leigh bardugo#the grishaverse#genya safin#david kostyk#genya x david#tolya yul bataar#tolya and tamar#tamar kir bataar#shadow and bone netflix#i worked on this all day#i actually love it#lowkey hate it tho
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Kurtbastian fic “Always and Forever” Chapter 3
Summary: After the death of their daughter Grace, Kurt and Sebastian drift apart. Kurt wraps himself up in his grief so tightly he starts to push Sebastian away, and Sebastian, feeling himself shoved aside when he needs Kurt most, cheats. They make the decision to start over, to leave New York City and their pain behind, and start over again in a house Upstate. Sebastian buys Kurt a "fixer upper" and gives him free reign. While redecorating the room that will be his studio, Kurt comes across something interesting underneath the wallpaper. It starts to become an obsession for Kurt - an obsession that begins to replace Kurt's love for his husband, which Sebastian is holding on to by a thread. Can Kurt and Sebastian break through the pain and the hurt and find a way to fall in love again?
Read on AO3.
Chapter 3 (4753 words)
Kurt stares out his studio window at the neighborhood below. It’s 10:15 a.m. and a Tuesday, so it isn’t as if the place is teeming with activity. Everyone living on Colony Lane seems content to stick to their own spaces, abide by their own schedules, and go about their lives without much interference from the world outside.
Kurt hates to hand it to Sebastian, but that’s what he wants as well. Isolation in a quaint fixer-upper is precisely what he needs.
Another point for Sebastian.
Damn.
He seems to be racking them up lately, while Kurt…
Kurt can admit that he’s not trying as hard as he should be, but he’s giving himself permission to be selfish. There shouldn’t be a timetable for bouncing back from loss, and Kurt got the double-whammy.
Sebastian gave him betrayal to get over, too.
Kurt knows that he should deem repairing his marriage a priority, but he also needs to do what’s right for him.
He hasn’t figured out what that is yet, but it'll come to him.
Underlying childhood guilt has him believing that he should introduce himself to the neighbors. Etiquette and all that. It’s what his mother would do. Every time his family moved, and there had been a handful of times, Kurt’s mother would bake a batch of cookies for the neighbors. She'd put a baker's dozen into colorful cellophane bags, tie the tops with curled ribbon, and take them door to door to say hello. She wouldn’t wait for people to show up on their doorstep with a casserole and a smile. She believed in being proactive. She would tell him, “New neighborhood, new life. Go out and be a part of it.”
But Kurt doesn’t want to, and the neighbors seem fine with that.
It’s been three days, and Kurt and Sebastian have only gotten one visitor – the technician who came to fix the heating. Of course, the neighbors could be waiting for them to get settled. Then they’ll pounce over with perfectly iced Gingerbread Bundt cakes and Chicken Kievs, church invites, and Girl Scout cookie order forms, like a swarm of Stepford Wives.
Kurt doesn’t care about being proactive, and his mother isn’t around to scold him for behaving like a hermit.
That may sound harsh, but it's true.
The clouds pulling together in the sky overhead, threatening rain, give Kurt an excuse to shut himself away and work on the house - an excuse he can ply without the assistance of a tragic backstory. With his laptop open on the floor in front of him, he browses those websites that feed his design fetishes: Ethan Allen, Neiman Marcus, Anthropologie.
But he's not the least bit inspired.
He’d decided to start small, take things room by room instead of attacking everything at once. But he gets stumped, staring at the screen in front of him, unsure whether the chair he’s been mulling over for the past half hour is gorgeous or gaudy.
He should focus on bringing the living room together since it’s where they do the bulk of their entertaining, provided they ever start entertaining again. And he should do something about the master bedroom, which, for the moment, houses a bed, a TV, and a dresser within the confines of four ashy walls.
Opinions on the topic vary, but Kurt has always felt that the bedrooms are the heart of the home. They’re sanctuaries where dreaming, planning, and affirmation happen. He only has the one to worry about, so he should put extra effort into making it comforting, relaxing, sensual on the off chance he ever plans on touching his husband again.
The jury is still out on that one, unfortunately.
The kitchen, he’s not looking forward to decorating. Aside from his studio, he and Grace spent much of their time together in the kitchen. They baked daily: cakes, cookies, bread, and anything else they could slop onto a baking sheet and shove into the oven. They also made jam, pickled fruit, and taught themselves (using YouTube videos mainly) to prepare various types of cuisine. Some were a hit, others a miss, but it was always an adventure.
Kurt had done something similar with his mother and her collection of vintage cookbooks, congregating around the kitchen island in the afternoons to shed the angst of public school, and spread the wings of his stifled creativity. He and his mother discussed everything in the kitchen while sifting flour and creaming butter. It was a tradition he had so looked forward to continuing.
Now, he’d rather not be bothered going into the kitchen again.
He could pick a page out of the IKEA catalog and recreate it. That should offend him. It did when Sebastian suggested it the first time Kurt redecorated their penthouse. But Kurt hardly cares. It doesn’t matter as much as it did. He can’t remember the last time he stepped into the kitchen and prepared anything more elaborate than toast and coffee, maybe dry scrambled eggs. Sebastian took over cooking duties after Grace died, which, nine times out of ten, means ordering out, if for no other reason than he gets to leave the house to pick up the food.
He knows Kurt appreciates the time alone more than he does a home-cooked meal.
Then there’s Sebastian’s office, which Kurt is decorating for the first time. He has tried to start a shopping cart for it numerous times, but, unlike the windfall of ideas he had for his studio, he can’t get into a groove. He remembers a time when thinking about decorating Sebastian’s office put a hundred ideas into his head.
Currently, he has only one.
The cheap, vomit-worthy, knock-off furnishings of the no-tell hotel room he pictures whenever he thinks of Sebastian sleeping with another man.
Kurt shivers in disgust. He wouldn't wish that on his worst enemy.
The room or the infidelity.
But how would Sebastian react if Kurt decorated his office to look like the business suite at the Marriott?
Kurt snickers, envisioning the sitcom-worthy shock that would erupt on Sebastian's face if he presented that to him.
"As you can see," Kurt would say, strolling through the room with his head held high atop the straightest spine pettiness can deliver, "I have chosen the most flame-retardant carpet available in subtle hues of tan and beige, a color combination well suited for concealing cum stains. This ergonomic, curved leather loveseat, for when you want to get adventurous with your afternoon romps, which, at your age, requires plenty of lumbar support. Plus, it cleans up in a snap with just a Clorox wipe, so that's a useful feature. Faux fireplace, faux aquarium, faux chandelier... are we sensing a theme? And in the corner, I've provided you a foldout of your own, for when you bring... ahem... work home."
The grin on Kurt's lips slides when Sebastian, wearing a gutted expression, pops to mind. It's an expression that Kurt didn't believe possible for Sebastian till their daughter died. He's only seen it once. He doesn't want to bring it back.
He sighs.
Revenge-dreaming isn't helping.
It isn't as satisfying as he thought it would be.
He’s not breaking through his creative block anytime soon. He puts his plans for the other rooms on the back burner and decides to spend time picking out furniture for his studio. With the exception of his sewing machines, he didn’t bring anything from his penthouse studio here, so he’s starting over fresh. He switches tabs and starts filling his online shopping cart with the basics: a new drafting table, a cabinet, a chair he’ll have to custom-upholster, a bolt of drapery fabric he can repurpose to make a bedspread (if he goes through with his plans for a foldout), and a few other miscellaneous odds and ends, nothing worth wasting too much brain-power over.
The clunk-clunk of Sebastian stacking cans in the kitchen cabinets reaches Kurt upstairs, as does the water running in the sink while he washes dishes and the squeak of the sticky pantry door when he fixes it. Kurt plans on redoing the kitchen and giving the entire room a facelift. Sebastian knows that. But repairing the door gives Sebastian something to do.
Sebastian has been considerate enough to let Kurt do his thing undisturbed for the morning. Kurt’s reluctance to talk to anyone extends to Sebastian, which Sebastian understands. He’s keeping his distance. But it’s nice to hear him puttering around the house. It gives Kurt comfort, the same way listening to his father snore in the middle of the night helped Kurt feel less alone after his mother died.
He may want to be left alone, but it’s nice to know that he’s not alone.
Especially not today.
Today did not start out good for Kurt.
Kurt woke up later than he’d intended, and when he did, he couldn’t remember where he was. Sebastian had woken up and gotten out of bed hours earlier, leaving Kurt alone to sleep in. Kurt climbed out of bed and wandered around frightened, hands crawling along the walls, searching for something familiar. Footsteps passed somewhere underneath him, and he froze. He didn’t want to venture downstairs because he didn’t know who could be there. Maybe someone had broken in, or worse - this was somebody else’s house, and Kurt was the intruder.
His heart raced. He started hyperventilating. He went from room to room, trying to figure out where he was and why he was there. It wasn’t until the second time he went into his studio that he began to remember. He saw his bag on the floor and, beside it, his sketchbook. He remembered sitting in there the day before, making plans. He remembered the wood grain of the floor, the dusty glass, the tree outside, the wallpaper, and that ripped corner by the window, which Kurt refuses to acknowledge any more than he has to.
He feels it behind him, like the sun on his back, trying to get him to turn his face to it, but he refuses. Of all the things he needs to deal with, that ripped corner and the word beneath it don’t make the list. It isn't doing the palpitations in his chest any favors.
It confuses him.
It angers him.
It saddens him.
It makes him consider what could have been, forces him to face everything he's lost. He didn't succeed in running away from his problems. He ran headlong into brand new ones.
But this is his house. He has to get used to it.
These episodes aren’t uncommon. They crop up whenever Kurt needs to adapt to change. They’re unexpected, like mines in fields he discovers he’s been running through when a second ago he was picking flowers in the park or strolling down the street.
It's their unpredictability that is the true torture.
They show up even on his good days.
His life for the last ten years revolved around his daughter. When she was a baby, he adjusted his work schedule to match her sleep schedule. They had the money to afford the best nurses in New York, but Kurt didn’t want that. He didn’t want his daughter raised by a governess. He was as hands-on a parent as there ever was.
As Grace grew, her schedule changed, and Kurt adjusted: daycare, Gymboree, kindergarten, ballet, elementary school. He dropped her off in the mornings, then picked her up in the afternoons. They spent the rest of the day going over her homework until it was time to make dinner, which they did together.
That was the great thing about being a designer and freelance editor. Kurt could work from anywhere, and, aside from doing consultations at Vogue, he could work any time.
When Grace became sick, her doctor visits and her medication regimen dictated Kurt's schedule, then her chemo.
Towards the end, there was only one item written in Kurt’s schedule - lie beside his daughter in her bed, holding on to her for dear life.
And not just her life.
His, too.
In sickness and in health, Grace kept Kurt’s life regulated.
Things flipped drastically when she died.
He felt adrift. Detached from the life he had gotten used to, he didn’t know what to latch on to. His internal clock would wake him up at six to get Grace ready for the day, only to find himself walking into a vacant bedroom. At the supermarket, he would grab her favorite cereal out of habit and put it in his cart, even though it wasn’t on the list. He would jolt when he'd come across a song he thought she’d like or saw an advertisement for a movie he thought she’d enjoy.
He has yet to stop the automatic deposits from his bank account to hers, her weekly allowance piling up on top of birthday and Christmas money. She had earmarked it for college (her decision, not his). Now it waits to be donated to the children’s hospital that took such incredible care of her. He doesn’t have the heart to empty it. She was so proud of it.
He doesn’t know what it will do to him to see the balance at zero.
But the worst moment of all, the absolute worst, was when he tried to go back to work right after they lost her.
There are many moments after Grace’s death, during Kurt’s own struggle for acceptance, that blur together, but this one he remembers so vividly, it brings a lump to his throat and tears to his eyes.
He was in the middle of a brainstorming session with his team. His boss Isabelle was there. She had dropped by with a box of cronuts and a grande nonfat mocha. Kurt hadn’t been eating. Everyone could tell. But Kurt overlooked the signs – the sharper than normal angle to his cheekbones and chin, his collarbone that showed through his skin a little too much, his hands that never stopped shaking. He had waved the food away when she offered.
An hour later, he was on his third one.
The tension of his presence in the office so soon after his daughter’s death slowly dissipated, making way for the familiar, though attenuated, back and forth banter he had so missed. Without knowing it, he was paving the way for a potential comeback. He wouldn’t have a line up for a while, and he would need to keep an eye on fashion trends as they came and went in his absence. But this, this felt so natural, so normal, it almost seemed like it was. He got caught up in the rhythm of this impromptu jam session. He smiled, he laughed.
He felt alive again.
Somewhere in the middle of outlining a rough schedule, he glanced down at the time on his phone. Mid-sentence, he got up from his chair and walked over to get his coat off the hook by the door.
“Alright,” he said with a chuckle over Chase’s last clap back at a jab from his boyfriend Ian, “thanks for everything, you guys, but I’ve gotta run. We’ll talk about this more when I come in tomorrow.”
The room went pin-drop silent. Kurt didn’t notice.
“Where are you going?” Isabelle asked, getting up from her seat on the corner of his desk and approaching, knowing that he would need her in a second, the way she always knew. Kurt has referred to Isabelle as his Fairy Godmother ever since he first walked into Vogue fresh out of high school and trying to find a foothold in the hectic Gulf Stream that is New York City. She became his pillar of support, a sympathetic ear, and a clear head whenever he needed one. She had thrown his bachelor party. Hers was the condo he stayed in the night before his wedding. She’d hosted Grace’s baby shower.
Also, Grace’s wake.
She didn’t have children of her own and didn't plan on it, but she loved Grace as much as anyone.
And hers was the shoulder Kurt cried on when he found out Sebastian had cheated.
Kurt looked at her, confused, wondering why it was that everyone around him seemed to be holding their breath. “I just… have to go pick up Grace. From school. I’m going… I’m going to be late.”
Isabelle shook her head and put a hand on his. “Sweetie… ”
It took Kurt a second.
Even after one person gasped and another sniffled, with Isabelle’s sorrowful eyes staring at him, begging him to remember so she wouldn’t have to say it, he didn’t catch on.
When he did, it hit him like an electric shock straight through his body, rendering his muscles useless, and he crumbled to the floor. Isabelle held him for over an hour in that spot until Sebastian arrived. Kurt didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to go to their empty penthouse and face the truth about his empty life. He wanted to stay at Vogue with Isabelle and live in that moment where everything was alright again for one shimmering second, even if it wasn’t real.
But he had to go. He had to leave with Sebastian, who had hurt him, back to his home, even if it killed him because even though he felt like his life was over, everything else continued on. People lived, and people died. The sun set in the evening, but in the morning, it would rise again.
He just didn’t want to be a part of it anymore.
Not without his Grace.
He was cried out by the time Sebastian got him home. Sebastian undressed him, helped him with his cleaning and moisturizing routine, and then put him to bed. It was Friday evening when Kurt shut his eyes and went to sleep. He lived that horrible moment at his office over again a hundred times before he opened his eyes. And when he did, it was Sunday morning.
Like this morning, but to a greater extent, when these attacks happen, locked in his own brain, sifting through the pieces to find one big enough and sturdy enough to hold on to, Kurt loses time.
In a blink, hours go by, sometimes a day. He’ll climb in the shower in the morning, turn the water on hot, and by the time he realizes it’s cold, it’s close to noon. He has sat at the dining room table for breakfast, staring at a bowl of oatmeal, and when he found the will to pick up the spoon, the oatmeal was old and stiff, and it was dinner time. He’s gone to bed on Monday and stared at the black behind his eyelids till Wednesday.
As far as Kurt knows, it’s only around lunchtime, but he glances at the clock in the corner of his screen to make sure.
12:45.
He breathes a sigh of relief. He double-checks the date to make sure he has a reason to and sighs again.
Still Tuesday.
Kurt switches back to the IKEA tab he’d been laboring long but not hard on earlier. He looks at the shopping cart he’s been steadily filling, scrolls through his selections of personality bereft, assembly line furniture, and groans. This isn’t him. This house, this blank slate, should be an endless fount of motivation.
But he's numb.
Maybe he's rushing into this. He should give this house and the neighborhood time to grow on him before he sentences it to the mundane.
He needs a break. (Kurt Hummel need a break from shopping? Since when?) He flips to a new page in his sketchbook. For shits and giggles, he tries drawing a sketch for his husband’s office. He starts with the easy part – Sebastian’s desk. Sebastian didn’t leave that in the penthouse, so Kurt will make it the linchpin and design around it.
Things flow surprisingly easily from there once he gets started, with a pencil in his hand writing on paper instead of working on a screen: an ornamental rug, a matching leather chair, burgundy velvet curtains, a chainmail style Tiffany desk lamp, 1930s art deco décor with a soupcon of Persian flair. But he doesn’t want the room to be too dark. No. Kurt wants nothing in their house to be dark. He adds a Salento chandelier over the open portion of the room and a sweep of color – one wall, opposite a window, a lighter shade than the rest. He doesn’t know what Sebastian’s office looks like, but there has to be a wall in there that will fit the bill.
An enamel and copper vase, a Khatam inlaid photo frame, a few Negar Gari…
Kurt stops.
Would Sebastian want that? The softer elements countering the strict lines of the art deco pieces, what could be described as feminine influences, are Kurt’s signature touch. But might Sebastian prefer the art deco without Kurt’s fingerprints all over it? Isn’t that what Sebastian meant by Kurt being heavy-handed with the pastels?
Back in high school, Kurt had decorated his bedroom so that he and his stepbrother could share it. He'd skipped school so he could complete it in one day. He’d worked hard on it, trying to fuse a masculine air with his theatrical influence. What he thought was an eclectic representation of the masculine and the feminine turned into a Moroccan-themed disaster.
The word his stepbrother chose to use at the time was faggy, but there were ulterior motives behind it.
Sebastian made jabs in high school about Kurt not wearing boy clothes, comments that adult Kurt recognizes as the teenage boy equivalent of pulling Kurt’s pigtails. But at the time, they stung. Sebastian wouldn’t have made those comments if there weren’t a grain of truth to them, would he?
Sebastian has never retracted those statements, so as far as Kurt is concerned, they stand.
Kurt flips his pencil over and starts erasing. He’ll pare down the extras – trade the Tiffany lamp for a banker’s lamp, replace the rug with something more Brooks Brothers than Pier 1.
Maybe he should just opt for another IKEA recreation, but that feels like copping out, going back on his word.
He could always ask Sebastian. He swears his husband has passed by a few times, his footsteps rising and falling outside his door, but Kurt didn’t think anything of it. He figures Sebastian is passing through on his way to get something from the bedroom that he needs downstairs. Kurt doesn’t imagine the man is pacing the hallway, even if he is, trying to find a way to tell Kurt that lunch is ready. Little things like lunch, innocuous things, have become huge divides over the past few months. With anyone else, Sebastian has a history of railroading over them, hurt feelings be damned.
But Sebastian has learned his lesson. He paid a hefty price learning it, too.
Contemplating between clearing his throat so that Kurt knows he’s there and letting another meal go cold, he sees Kurt’s head lift up. It seems like an opening. Whether or not it is, Sebastian takes it.
“Lunch is ready.”
“Mm-hmm,” Kurt mumbles, brushing eraser shavings aside.
“Are you… are you coming downstairs?”
Kurt erases again, then pencils something on a sheet of paper that Sebastian can’t see. “Hmm… mmm?”
It sounds like a question and an answer, but since Kurt doesn’t follow it up with anything, it most likely means that Kurt will be skipping lunch… again. Sebastian knocks idly on the door frame, giving Kurt a second longer to tell him for sure.
“Alright.” Disappointed, he turns to leave. “I guess I’ll come back up at dinner then.”
Kurt doesn’t know why the thought returns when he wasn’t even thinking about it, why it decided to nag at his brain when he had been able to ignore it for this long, but that’s the way his brain works now. His thoughts don’t always travel straight paths. They twist and turn, taking one thing and linking it to something unrelated. Erasing the ideas he’d sketched out, removing every inch of himself from Sebastian’s office, made him think about how eager he was to be rid of that word darling from above the window, and that ripped corner returns to his mind with a vengeance.
Well, as long as Sebastian is there, he might as well ask.
“Sebastian?”
Sebastian pauses in the doorway, not daring to move. “Yes?”
“When was the last time you were here?” Kurt raised an eyebrow at the idea when it originally came to him. When would Sebastian have come to this house that Kurt didn’t know? They traveled Upstate once a year, but they always did it together as a family. And while they were here, Sebastian rarely ventured out alone. Sebastian isn’t the kind of person who would buy a house sight unseen.
Unless he had found it during one of his outings with Grace. Which would mean that Grace had seen the inside.
Grace would have seen this room and thought it would be hers, thought that they would someday live here, and Sebastian hid that word darling by the window for her and not Kurt.
The thought is so painful, it makes Kurt want to tear his nails out with his teeth so he’ll stop thinking about it.
Sebastian keeps his eyes locked to Kurt’s profile so he won’t miss the moment Kurt decides to look at him instead of the floor, the wall, or the ceiling.
“I found this house online. It wasn’t even on the market when I stumbled on it. To be honest, I’d only driven by it once. I hadn’t been inside until we moved in.”
“But you saw the inside,” Kurt asks. “Otherwise, how would you know about this room?”
“I took a virtual tour,” Sebastian admits sheepishly, “but it was extremely thorough. I’ve seen the blueprints, gone over the permits and the zoning. I had Tristan from the office look over the place when he came up to visit his folks. He facetimed me while he was here.” Sebastian furrows his brow. “Why? Is something wrong?”
Kurt’s heart beats regular again. Grace hadn’t seen it.
Thank God.
His eyes find the torn section of wallpaper, but they don’t stay there. He doesn’t want to clue Sebastian in about it if Sebastian doesn’t already know. He wants to uncover this mystery on his own. If Sebastian gets to keep secrets, big ones at that, then Kurt wants this one for himself.
“No, no. Nothing’s wrong. I was just curious, you know. Wanted to understand your process. Why this house, why this neighborhood, that sort of thing.”
Kurt’s sentence comes out choppy. It’s odd how awkward talking has become for them. Sebastian used to think that the two things they had mastered were talking and fucking. They did both together with such ease. There were never any boundaries between them, emotionally or physically. Even when they were cutting each other down, which they did in the beginning, they did so with such finesse.
Not like now, when Sebastian is walking on eggshells and Kurt doesn’t want to hear half of what he has to say.
“If you come down for lunch, we can talk about my process. If you’re curious, that is.” Sebastian watches Kurt expectantly, waiting for an answer.
And while Sebastian does, Kurt looks at his sketch – Sebastian’s office, the same way Sebastian always has it decorated. This is Sebastian without him and Grace: bland and emotionless, no light, little color, and no joy. Nothing exciting, nothing nuanced, nothing to indicate that he and Sebastian are together.
Not even those snapshots he’s so proud of.
Kurt hasn’t decided whether that’s a bleak picture or not.
“Sure. I’ll be down in a sec,” Kurt decides because he does and doesn’t have an answer to that one. It changes as the day changes, and the days change too quickly.
“Alright. I’ll be waiting.” Sebastian walks away, or Kurt thinks he does. He checks the time on his clock. It’s closing in on 2.
Kurt glances up at the window, the dangling wallpaper bouncing with the breeze coming from a draft near the ceiling. It would be so easy to tear it down – grab an edge and rip, be done with it once and for all. It might even feel cathartic, exposing whatever is underneath it. But lunch is ready. He’s already left Sebastian waiting long enough.
He leaves that mystery for another day.
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Addressing the Batman Conspiracy theories, on the Wayne Family true crime podcast.
(this is based off of my post. I just had fun with this, and yes it's very chaotic. I hope it makes sense!)
"Welcome, listeners, to this months episode of the Wayne Family Circus-"
"That is NOT what it is called and you know it!"
"Okay okay! Shut up Tim!"
There was a hard cut in the audio. You, the listener, smile and put your car into reverse, backing out of your parking spot, you had a long drive to get home, and hopefully this new podcast will entertain you.
"As I was saying! Welcome to episode seven of Crime In Our Midst - I still hate that name - today we are discussing our most requested case. The Mysterious Batman. We will be discussing where he came from, and conspiracy theories involving him," the voice said, ending with a hum. "Today, I am your host, and for anyone who doesn't know, I'm Dick Grayson, the eldest Wayne child. To my left is our illustrious father, and number one theory for today, Bruce Wayne."
"Dick, I told you I didn't want-" a new, deeper male voice started.
"Next to him is Jason, the second eldest and the wildcard of the family."
"Sup bi*****," was the voice response.
"Master Jason," an older accented voice inputted.
"Sorry Alfie."
"Then we have Cassandra Cain-Wayne."
"Hello!" A chipper female voice said.
"They can't see you wave, Cass."
"Oh, sorry."
"Tim Drake is also present, as always. Tim have you ever missed an episode?"
"No," a softer male voice said with a hum.
"Even Damian has missed."
"Tt, that is because I have a life, unlike Drake."
"I am literally a CEO-"
"And just then you heard Damian Wayne, our youngest and saltiest member. Say Hi, Damian."
"Salutations," a younger sounding, yet still accented voice said.
"So formal," the host, Dick, said with a laugh. "And always, we are moderated by our Butler and Grandfather, Alfred Pennyworth!"
"Hello, listeners."
"And this week, we are joined by special guest, Barbara Gordon, daughter of Ex-Commissioner, Jim Gordon. He's not here in person, because he said, and I quote, 'This is bs and there's no amount of money you could pay me to be on your weird podcast'. To which I would like to counter, Jim, we most likely could pay that amount of money-"
"Grayson, you're rambling again," Damian said, sounding annoyed.
"Why did Dick get to host this episode?" Jason asked.
"Because it's Bruce didn't want to, so it was my turn next, shut up Jason."
"Come at me!"
There was another hard cut and a few seconds of pause. You chuckled, already enjoying this pointless bickering.
"So. We're going to start at the beginning. Batman, the masked vigilante who guards Gotham and battles crime, appeared way back when in the 2000's. He was considered a criminal for a long time, mostly due to his method of fear and violence, despite that he never killed, and solved countless cold cases - much like we do, if I might add -" Dick started explaining, paper could be heard rustling.
"Yeah but we don't dress up in spandex and go out every night and punch people, Dick."
"Okay, obviously, Jason."
There was muffled sniggering and then a grunt as someone got hit.
"Boys, calm down and let your brother finish explaining."
"Thank you, Bruce!" Dick exclaimed, there was the beginning of a yell and then another audio cut.
"Batman eventually became a founding member of the Justice League of America, alongside heroes such as Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Green Lantern and the Flash. It was around this time his protege, Robin, joined his side for the first time. Batman would eventually become the hero of our city, stopping criminals such as the Joker, Bane, Harley Quinn, the Riddler, and Poison Ivy, whom we all Stan," Dick's smooth voice continued.
"Dick," Bruce warned.
"Continuing! It is believed that Batman has had five or six different Robin's over the years, including two female ones, though neither were Robin for very long. The Batman has become a international, and even interstellar hero, working with the Green Lantern Corp on many occasions. I don't think I need to go into further detail, as almost everyone knows who the Batman is. Now let's get into theories!"
"Oh, finally," Tim said, followed by a muffled yawn.
"Shush, Drake. Let Grayson finish talking."
"Now most the theories are about Batman's secret identity or where he came from, right? And obviously the number one theory is that Bruce Wayne, our dear daddy here, is Batman."
"Do not ever say those words again," Jason groaned out.
"I most likely will."
"Can we all just agree this theory is absolute bulls***?"
"Damian!"
"I am speaking the truth father. I live with you, I can confidentially say you do not spend your nights running around Gotham unless it is in a sports car with some annoying woman-"
"Master Damian."
"My apologies Alfred."
"Can I give the evidence?!" Dick exclaimed.
There was mocking noises, and yet ANOTHER hard audio cut.
"So the main source of evidence is that Bruce Wayne and Batman have never been seen together. Which isn't true, because I have seen, and there is photographic evidence of such, which of course, you can find on our website!"
"The second evidence is something about them having the same a**, which I would rather not go into because of obvious reasons. Third, is all of us kids, somebody on Reddit mapped out all of our arrivals with in a years time of the Robin's arrival, and they think that we are the Robin's."
"Implausible. Have you seen Drake? He couldn't be a Robin, he'd snap right in half. And the second Robin died in an explosions, wouldn't that be Jason?" Damian countered.
"There actually was a kid Bruce fostered for a bit named Jason that actually died in an accident," Dick explained. "People think that Jason is the Robin."
"So we're not going to discuss the fact that you had another kid named Jason?"
"Jason, we've already discussed this a million times, I did not bring you into the family because of your name-"
"Can I continue?!"
"Please," A female voice piped in, Cass.
"Okay, the rest of the evidence is just kinda, fishy, I guess? Someone reports having heard Bruce actively state he was Batman as an excuse to not be on a jury duty, but let's be honest, who hasn't? Lastly is that Bruce Wayne disappears a lot around the time big things are happening, which is quote 'awfully coincidentally.' but circumstantial. An example of this is about five years back, Batman and Bruce Wayne both disappeared for a week, and then when Batman came back, he was reportedly 'different, more cheerful, and more charming. Less threatening', while Bruce Wayne remainder missing. Nearly a year later, Bruce Wayne returned, and Batman once again became gruff and intimidating. Shall we discuss this theory?"
"I don't see what we need to discuss," Damian grumbled.
"It's really not good evidence, but it is a good theory," Tim chipped in.
Jason spoke next. "I haven't been here for long, so it seems plausible to me."
"Jason!"
"What?!"
More bickering. Audio cut. This is getting a little weird with all the audio cuts.
"I think we can all agree that Bruce is not Batman," Cass said finally.
"Dad thinks the Bruce Wayne theory is dumb, and he's been working with Batman since year two. They're nothing alike. He suspected Bruce for a few years, but started seeing them in the same room and area and finally had to drop the theory," another female voice spoke, sounding bored.
"See? So, not plausible, moving on," Damian said dismissively.
The next theory was about some random middle aged man, the whole team thought this one wasn't terribly plausible either.
The third theory was that Batman was some type of alien, and this caused a lot of loud bickering and arguing.
The final theory was that Batman was a vampire, and all the kids seemed to like this theory, while Bruce was less then amused.
"Okay, Bruce, who do you think the Batman is?" Jason asked the second Dick closed out his presentation.
"I think he's a hero who protects the city and the planet, and had saved my life, and the lives of those closest too me, many times. If he wishes to keep his identity secret, then we should respect that the same way we respect Superman and Wonder Woman."
"Boooooo!" Jason and Tim yelled.
"Come on, Bruce. Really, give us an answer."
"Okay, I can't because I do actually know who it is," Bruce admitted.
"WHAT?" Tim screeched.
"You know who the Batman is and never told us?!" Dick exclaimed.
"Did you really miss his speech just now?" Damian asked with a huff. "He obviously wants to protect The Batman."
"You won't tell us?" Cass asked.
"Nope."
More bickering over this for a moment.
"Okay, how many agree with Vampire theory?" Dick asked.
There was a pause in the audio.
"Okay that's four. Any takers on alien theory? . . . No hands. Smith theory? And that's one. Jason and Damian, do you want to elaborate?"
"I still vote for Bruce Wayne theory," Jason said with a sigh.
"OH MY GOD-"
"OW! BRUCE HE PUNCHED ME!"
"BOYS!"
There was muffled speaking and sounds of hitting.
"Damian?"
"I don't like any of the theories."
"Do you have your own then?"
"Not particularly, but I suppose if I would have to give one. . . I believe the Batman is just some random guy with some behavioral and mental issues, and decided that the best way to combat crime, instead of becoming a police detective, was to put on spandex and Kevlar and a bat mask and theme everything after bats."
Dick chuckled. "Well there you have it folks. We finally tackled the Batman conspiracy, now could you please stop flooding our social medias with requests for it? Take that as you may, but obviously, as Bruce said, even if some of our members may know the identity of the Batman, we will not disclose that information, because it's not ours to give away. It's his choice and his privacy, so do not ask us who he is. We will not tell. Guys, anything to say?"
"I'm tired-"
"Tim you're always tired!"
"Ookaaaay! Anyway, next month is Bruce's turn, since we switched, and as always, we'll be putting up a poll on Twitter to see what case you want us to discuss! Until next time, this is the Wayne family signing off!"
"Goodbye."
"Peace out."
"Farwell."
"Death is inevitable."
"Time is a social construct."
"Children- Thank you for listening!"
"Please free me from this hell-"
"And in all the other ways to say it, Goodbye, and Goodnight!"
And you, dear listener, were left to listen to dead silence for a few minutes until you reached your destination, thoroughly confused, and mildly unsettled.
#batfam#batfam headcanons#headcanons#drabbles#drabble#writing#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#cassandra cain#damian wayne#barbara gordon#alfred Pennyworth#conspiracy theories#queerbutstillhere#queerbutstillhere writes
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i know i’ve talked about svs a lot recently, but i’m not gonna stop until i run out of things to say.
alright, this starts with talking about janus and virgil, if you watch them interact on screen for any amount of time it’s clear that they’re there to annoy the shit out of each other nine times out of ten. “hi, hello, what do you want?” “virgil i love how you just ruined my dramatic introduction, muh muh.” “yeah? well your face ruined my day, so we’ll call it even.” need i say more?
so, this feeds into the entire courtroom scenario, and specifically, who ends up as what role.
patton is the defense attorney, janus is prosecution, thomas is the defendant, all of that makes sense. logan is a witness and is benched for much of the trial, a shame, roman is the judge, okay, and virgil, is the jury?
so, i wanna talk about this for a minute here. janus picked the parts, clearly, and, okay logan would have been best for all the parts i’m going to say it here and we’re going to move on but it’s true, they all at least kinda make sense, roman makes the joke about how he can do judgy, but, virgil as the jury? janus clearly knows that virgil hates him, it’s very obvious and it seems like a mutual distaste if not hatred at least. but the jury makes the final decision, virgil even says when roman tries to decide on a verdict, “the jury decides that, what am i doing? i don’t, care.” so, why would janus pick virgil for the role? logan would have been best for the jury role as when necessary he plays moderator and tries to remain neutral when he does so, but logan gets benched instead.
so, janus picks virgil for the jury, and i believe it all goes back to janus’s goal.
alright, janus’s line from much later in the episode, “no! i am trying to teach you a lesson, but it is literally impossible!” he’s trying to show them something, to prove to them that thomas is not perfect and that he would be willing to achieve something selfish through dishonest means, and how do we see janus trying to teach said lesson throughout the video?
well, okay, i hate using the term “manipulative” or “manipulate” in reference to janus because people will take it out of context so i’ll preface this with saying that janus is not “canonically unsympathetic” he’s one of thomas’s sides and as such he’s doing what he believes to be best for thomas, in this case it’s proving to the others that thomas is not perfect and that he is selfish sometimes.
alright, with that out of the way, janus tries to teach that lesson through manipulation.
firstly, look at the layout of the courtroom, we don’t get a sweeping shot or anything, but it’s rather large and everyone is separated, not by camera shots like normal, but physically in the space, virgil is over in the jury booth, roman is at the judge’s table, logan is in the very back of the room, janus is at the prosecution table, and patton at thomas, the only two who are physically close for much of the episode, are at the defense table. now normally all the sides are relatively close, thomas stands in his living room with the sides standing around him, but not this time, this time, they’re all separated.
secondly, we’re gonna jump back to everyone’s roles and how janus acts. patton is the defense attorney, and while this makes sense initially, well he’s the one defending thomas before the courtroom scene kicks off, it's literally said in the episode that he “doesn’t know the rules [of court]”, so he’s trying to defend thomas in an environment he doesn’t understand. logan gets benched after being a witness for a few minutes, his first line is literally “you’re doing a courtroom scenario without me? unacceptable.” this is the kind of environment he’d thrive in, so janus benches him so that he can’t point out the holes in janus’s method. roman is the judge, and while he makes the joke “what does the judge even do?” it’s not about him not being the center of attention, instead, it’s that janus is flirting with him throughout the trial, it’s why roceit exploded after the episode, since roman is the romantic side, he reacts well to janus’s flirting and praise, janus does this, not “shut him down” but to distract him from his own points. finally, virgil, virgil is the jury, his first line once in court is “i’m too emotionally unstable for jury duty, can i be excused?” which prompts janus to make a somewhat mocking statement before he blows past the request, clearly trying to annoy virgil with his casting, and then, take a look at how janus talks to virgil while virgil’s on the witness stand, a moment i point out so often “oh so, you’ve never been reluctant to share anything with the group, then?” “don’t.” “what? i just meant your name.” “don’t.” in this moment janus is obviously referencing virgil being a darkside, but the fact that he even brings virgil’s name up at all shows how well they know each other, janus knows just what buttons to push to get virgil on the defensive about himself, so he focuses on his own secrets rather than defending thomas.
but it doesn’t work. janus tailors this manipulation to each side individually and separates them physically and it doesn’t work. the line i already pointed out, “no! i am trying to teach you a lesson, but it is literally impossible!” and who shows up after janus says this? logan, who is close with the other sides, and rises up with such a great line “falsehood. why don’t you just leave the teaching to me.” and what’s janus’s reaction to logan’s entrance? to be dramatic and to end with this line, “and there are smarter ways to get people to do what you want anyways.” before sinking out, this is where the theory of “janus half ducks out and thomas can’t lie to himself/his friends/his sides!” came from, as well as from his “i’m not going anywhere” line because, backwards speak, but janus doesn’t do that, and it’s clear why, “i’ll always be a part of you” he says, janus understands, a little better than pre-aa virgil did, that he’s crucial to thomas and to thomas’s functioning, and as such he doesn’t duck out, he just finds a “smarter way” to prove his point in redux.
my point? my point is that janus knew what he had to do to get the other sides to agree with him, he needed to separate them so they had to think for themselves, to make points against patton while sticking him in a situation he didn’t know all the rules of, to bench logan so he couldn’t make any logical points against janus, to flirt to roman to distract him from the matter at hand, and to annoy virgil while bringing up his secrets, so that virgil would focus on protecting himself instead of defending thomas. and? it almost worked.
janus is much smarter than i think a lot of us give him credit for, and i just wanted to point that out.
#thomas sanders#virgil sanders#janus sanders#logan sanders#roman sanders#patton sanders#sanders sides#does this count as a theory?#sanders sides theory#sanders sides notes#i have a lot of feelings about svs if you couldnt tell#abhjsbdkjsubeuf just just take this#just take my ramblings for what they are okay
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12 Angry Men: The Characters
While 12 Angry Men has a remarkably small cast for a motion picture, the problem is that twelve of the cast members happen to be main characters.
Twelve is a large number of main characters to balance out, especially when you only see them over the course of one day, in only one setting. The writers had the challenging job of making each character unique enough that the audience doesn’t mix them up, and while some of them are more distinct than others, each character is different enough so that the viewers can tell them apart.
As a result, 12 Angry Men is left with a surprisingly large main cast, full of characters that are neither infallible heroes, nor despicable villains. Much like Casablanca, it would seem like this film has an issue deciding a protagonist, as the character who would seem to fulfill this role, Henry Fonda’s Juror #8, doesn’t have a ‘problem pertaining to the plot’ that’s unique from any of the other characters. They all have the same problem: they need to come up with a verdict. And indeed, this film would seem to be without a true protagonist if not for another element: the protagonist’s reaction towards the problem.
You see, while every other character begins the story either certain of the boy’s guilt, or just wanting to say they are so that the jury ordeal can be over with, it is only Juror #8 who believes that the case deserves a closer examination.
As you may have guessed, today, we’re going to be examining the characters of 12 Angry Men, starting with our protagonist: Juror #8. Let’s take a look. (Spoilers below!)
Juror #8 is a rather interesting protagonist in that, as I mentioned in previous articles, he could be any one of us. He’s the ‘hero’ of the story, not because of any great feat, but because he was logical and thoughtful enough to take his job as a juror seriously enough to put real thought into the case at hand. This is not a story about a man who is certain of his correctness, this is a story about a man who is uncertain about someone’s guilt, and there is a huge difference. From the moment of his Establishing Character Moment of quiet reflection at the window, he’s in action to make sure that he, and the rest of the jury, comes to a fair, if not right, conclusion.
Juror #8 never claims he is right, merely that he has reasonable doubt that leads him to believe that he might be right. He wants to talk about the verdict, he wants to be careful, because a life is on the line. He takes his responsibility seriously, and that, at first, is what sets him up as our protagonist. It is his vote of ‘not guilty’ that gets the plot going proper, for without him, the film would have come to a whopping, depressing, ten minutes tops.
So, we know Juror #8 is responsible, and tries to be moral. What else do we know about him?
For one thing, he’s sharp.
Juror #8 knows that he can’t convince anyone to change their vote without some good evidence, which he brings and addresses. Bit by bit, he chips away the certainty around the testimonies, alibis, and evidence, bringing up arguments and doubts about the elements of the case that the other jurors are absolutely certain about. He’s quick to figure out people’s angles and point out flaws in logic, and he’s not afraid to call out someone’s bias. His exchange with Juror #3 proves this, as Juror #8 accuses him (rightfully so) of wanting to kill the defendant due to personal reasons.
Juror #8 is a Guile Hero, using his wits and brains to pick apart the evidence, the original Rogue Juror archetype, wanting to take his time to get through the facts. He cares about getting to the bottom of the facts, and he wants to get the other jurors on the side of justice as well.
Wait a minute, you say. I’ll buy that he’s the ‘hero’, but protagonists are supposed to change by the end of the story. There’s no sign of that at all!
Honestly, you’re right.
Juror #8, while clearly being the ‘hero’ of the film never seems to ‘change’ by the end of the film. In fact, he is the only character not to change, in vote as well as action. So what are we to make of that?
If the rest of the cast were as immovable as Juror #8, I would agree that his ‘protagonist’ status would certainly be called into question, and we may indeed be left with a protagonist-less film, however, there is one element that prevents that from happening: the fact that the other jurors do change their minds.
He’s the grounding element for the audience, courageous and standing for human decency. The point of his character is that he’s unyielding, unchanging in the face of peer pressure. It is in his influence, his changing of the other characters, that his test as a protagonist comes.
Of course, he succeeds, but the road is difficult. The first ally rallied to his cause, after a few minutes of deliberation, is Juror #9.
Juror #9 (Joseph Sweeney) is an observant Cool Old Guy, the Lancer to Juror #8. His abilities in Awesomeness by Analysis play a huge part in convincing the remaining jurors to change their votes, by standing with Juror #8 against the pressure and displaying a great deal of insight and sympathy. He’s also possessing of some pretty progressive ideas, not being bigoted like some of the younger jurors around him. While needing some thought before changing his vote, Juror #9 is not afraid to speak his mind and morality, making him a valuable ally in changing the course of the vote.
Leading us to the next vote change: Juror #5.
Juror #5 (Jack Klugman) has a bit in common with the defendant, coming from a similar background. He also grew up in the slums, and takes it quite personally that some of the jurors think that that’s suitable explanation for murder. He’s an invaluable addition, as it is his experience witnessing knife-fights that leads to the debunking of the grip necessary for the boy to have murdered his father. He’s a Nice Guy from a rough neighborhood, and ends up producing some key points in favor of the Not Guilty verdict.
Next to switch his vote is Juror #11 (George Voskovec), a man with Immigrant Patriotism, faith in the American dream of democracy and justice. The ‘Token Minority’ of the twelve, Juror #11 begins thinking of, and asking his own questions that can’t be satisfyingly answered with the evidence given. He’s a polite man, with a great concern with being fair and upright. In fact, it is one of his lines that best sums up the point of the film:
“We have a responsibility. This is a remarkable thing about democracy. That we are … what is the word? … Ah, notified! That we are notified by mail to come down to this place and decide on the guilt or innocence of a man we have not known before. We have nothing to gain or lose by our verdict. This is one of the reasons why we are strong. We should not make it a personal thing.”
He is here to remind us of the seriousness of jury duty, the importance of justice and fairness. His character warns us not to take our privileges for granted, something that we need to be reminded of. He is strong-minded, of strong character, and strong-willed
Leading us to the next switch in votes: Juror #2.
Juror #2 (John Fielder) is a timid man who doesn’t seem to have much of a backbone at first. He’s an Extreme Doormat, unable to really explain his opinions, tending to go along with the tide at first. As the film progresses, he does grow more of a spine, later evidenced by bringing up the question of the stab wound, which had been bothering him. Had he been more timid, there’s a possibility that the vote might have swapped once more, and Juror #8’s cause would be lost.
Then there’s Juror #6 (Edward Binns).
Juror #6 doesn’t have a whole lot of personality, admittedly. He doesn’t have a lot of dialogue, but he is fair minded, willing to change his mind if proven wrong. His chief moment of character is standing up to Juror #3’s interrupting of Juror #9, telling him that he ought to have more respect for his elders. In the end, Juror #6’s character is the switching point, announcing the stalemate, 6 to 6 for a vote.
The balance is changed again by Juror #7 (Jack Warden).
Juror #7 is a self-absorbed person, whose chief concern in the film is the baseball tickets ‘burning a hole’ in his pocket. There’s a game he wants to get to, and his chief concern is voting whichever way that will get him out the fastest. He pretends to be offended when his motives are questioned, but it’s clear that he’s just concerned with leaving. Unfortunately, his is the attitude we can most easily see happening in ourselves with the same task, distracted with Skewed Priorities and too busy being a Deadpan Snarker to put forth the effort our legal system deserves.
The next vote for Not Guilty goes to Juror #12 (Robert Webber), a Charmer and a Ditherer, almost as easily swayed as Juror #2. He works in an advertising agency, and spends most of the proceedings doodling or playing tic-tac-toe with the other jurors, too busy to pay attention. He approaches jury much like a board meeting, and as a result, his opinions aren’t all that substantial. All the same, he does become the eighth to side with Juror #8, further cementing the majority.
Following him is Juror #1, (Martin Balsam) the Foreman, a reasonable man who just wants this organized. He’s a football coach, a soft-spoken Reasonable Authority Figure who is willing to take charge and keep everyone in order. He’s always trying to reign things in and keep them under control, a vital element to the powder-keg that is the remainder of the jury.
Especially the next vote change: Juror #10 (Ed Begley).
One of the closest things this film has to an antagonist, the constantly coughing, Politically Incorrect Villain Juror #10 doesn’t need any evidence. To him, the boy’s background is enough. He’s a bitter, bigoted, racist Hate Sink, convinced begrudgingly to change his vote after his Villianous Breakdown rant, defeated by the lack of support from his peers.
One of the final holdouts, though not a villain, is Juror #4 (E.G. Marshall), another Reasonable Authority Figure and an Implacable Man. He is very logical and reasonable, holding out on changing his vote not out of malice, but of genuine concern for the facts. Wearing a set of Stoic Spectacles (Smart People Wear Glasses, after all), Juror #4 serves as a Hero Antagonist version of The Spock, countering with good arguments and valid questions. In the end, after his own reasons are shaken, Juror #4 graciously admits this and changes his vote, leaving us with the other closest thing this film has to an antagonist: Juror #3.
Juror #3 (Lee J. Cobb) is a bitter Big Bad with a Hair Trigger Temper, the Evil Counterpart to Juror #8. In a case of Believing Your Own Lies, Juror #3 is convinced he is impartial, the chief advocate for the death penalty of the group without realizing he is projecting his bad relationship with his son onto the case. He, too, switches his vote after a Villainous Breakdown, and Paper Destruction of Anger, but it is important to note that this is a Villainy-Free Villain, a Tragic Villain.
Juror #3 believes his opinion is firmly rooted in the facts, but it becomes very clear as the film progresses that he doesn’t really have as good a leg to stand on as he seems to think. His anger at the defendant is anger at his son, anger at all sons who ‘disrespect’ their fathers. He is unable to get his way in his family, and in the jury, and the result causes his bluster, and his inevitable downfall. In the end, after a Heel Realization, he changes his vote, the final Not Guilty.
As with all the characters, we don’t know if he changed his mind or his ways. For all we know, these men lived the rest of their lives untouched by the events in the jury room on the hottest day of the year, and honestly, that’s not a huge surprise.
These men, while not sharing the same backgrounds as many of us, are meant to be us. We are given a responsibility, a privilege to affect the decisions in our system of justice. We are meant to use it, to take advantage of it, and as a result, we are visible in these men. Whether we’re crusaders for justice, impatient and dismissive, bitter and resentful, or simply taking it for granted, these twelve angry men are us, the audience. It is up to us who we try to emulate, what values we hold dear, and how clearly we view them.
It is the ambiguity and the sheer brutal honesty in which these characters are depicted that this film’s legacy is made. Twelve men without names (aside from two in the epilogue) all too real to be comfortable for American audiences. This is, if not a realistic film, a real film, a mirror held to ourselves and our views on the systems we live with. It’s up to us to decide what we do once we catch a glimpse of the reflection.
Thank you guys so much for reading! Don’t forget that the ask box is always open for questions, suggestions, discussions, or just saying hi. I hope to see you all in the next article.
#Film#Movies#12 Angry Men#12 Angry Men 1957#1957#50s#Drama#Crime#PG#Henry Fonda#Lee J. Cobb#Ed Begley#E.G. Marshall#Jack Warden#Jack Klugman#Joseph Sweeney#George Voskovec#John Fiedler#Robert Webber#Edward Binns#Martin Balsam#Sidney Lumet
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SPBB 2019 - Masterlist
Thank you everyone for another great year of Spideypool Big Bang 2019!
For ease of reading, we’ve compiled a Masterlist of all our works below the cut.
See you again for SPBB 2020!
/End SPBB 2019
Title: The Bias of Judge, Jury, and Executioner
Author: IAmAllYetNotAtAll
Artist: Luce-xoxo
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: N/A
Word Count: 13K
Summary: Shield has tasked the Avengers with capturing and sending Deadpool to the Ice Box after a visiting diplomat is murdered. Peter has to disprove the allegations despite the substantial evidence against him, save his best friend, and also figure out why the thought of losing Wade terrifies him.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: A Full Guide On How To Adopt A Pet Spider
Author(s): noshallowend
Artist: thatbanananana
Rating: Mature
Warnings: N/A
Word Count: 8802
Summary: One, keep your Spider well-fed and hydrated. Eye-eating you in a questionable coffee shop will do. Two, your little pet needs a room, or is it you? Well, anyway, you have been warned, so don’t complain if you wake up pinned to your bed by a 5’ 10" love bug.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Choose Your Words Wisely
Author: TimidTurnip
Artist: Sofreakinmanyfandoms
Rating: E
Warnings: Dubcon, sexpollen, mpreg
Word Count: 10k
Summary: Peter should know by now that you can’t just say the first thing that comes to mind. That words carry weight, especially when directed at someone like Loki. Peter doesn’t really understand how getting him to fuck Wade is a punishment, not until his stomach starts to swell.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Peter Parker and the Very Bad No Good Mercenary Fleet
Author: ChibisUnleashed
Artist: ask-spideypool-42069
Rating: M
Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Temp Character Death
Word Count: 24,232
Summary: So what if Peter’s an enhanced human being? His everyday, average, utterly normal human being powers of very good lab work and drive to innovate have been far more useful to the universe. Peter Parker, owner and founder of Parker Tech, has been leading the cosmos in medical technology for years. Ever since he founded it, in fact.
Peter can’t leave a person in need without aid. It’s just not in him. So when he finds out a mercenary blockade has prevented the transport of vital medical supplies to a planet just outside of the United Front’s jurisdiction, he decides to go there and fix the situation by force (Because it’s mercenaries. Force will be necessary.)
Wade doesn’t really care either way, but if a hottie in a tight suit offered you a ridiculous amount of money to lend them a hand, would you say no?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Parallel Horizons
Author(s): mokuyoubi
Artist: Meeps
Rating: E
Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Temporary Major Character Death, Deadpool being Deadpool
Word Count: 40,700
Summary:When Peter B Parker enters the collider again to return to his own dimension, he’s dumped out a week into the future, but still in Miles’ universe. Repeated attempts to return home only speed up the damage done to his body by the glitches, and leave him stranded 2 years in the future. Enter Deadpool, who’s seen a lot of versions of Spider-Man, but never one so in need of a friend. He vows to save Peter’s life, whether he likes it or not. Along with Miles and Gwen, they work to repair the damage, and find out what’s keeping Peter from being able to return home. And maybe Peter finds he has more in common with the strange Merc than he could have anticipated.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Shooting For Your Heart
Author: theultimatespidey-petey
Artist: Jay
Rating: Teen and Up Audience
Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence
Word Count: 43K+ words
Summary:
“In my defense, I didn’t expect you to get hurt.”
“And I didn’t expect to be run out of town, yet here we are.”
He went suddenly stiff, “Wait…you were run out of town?”
“As if you didn’t know,” Peter grumbled, but when he looked up he did a double-take at Wade’s confused expression. “Almighty, you really don’t know, do you?” he snapped the drawer shut, “Well, after that little fiasco by Two-Stone Canyon, a little rumor spread that me and you were in cahoots. The rumor got some ground and it turned the whole town against me. I was run out before I could defend my case. Why'dya think I was out there the other night to begin with?”
<><><><><><>
When Peter Parker, a deputy known as Webslinger, gets accused of working with the West’s deadliest outlaw he finds himself on the run from the people he once trusted. But in an effort to prove his innocence, he finds himself captured by the very outlaw tarnishing his name.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Rooftops
Author: Jo
Artist: AiralySwirls
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Wade-typical temporary death
Word Count: 11,800
Summary: Spider-man is a mercenary. He’s not proud of it, but a job is a job and he’s good at it. Things get more complicated when he does a job one night with a loud-mouthed and sharp-shooting Deadpool, and even more complicated when the two grow close. When Wade introduces some demons from his past into Peter’s life, things fall apart.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: The Order of the Silver Spider
Author(s): @mscaptainwinchester
Artist: @blondeulence
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Word Count: 34000
Summary: When Wade Wilson signed his loyalty to Queen Shiklah of Monstropolis, he did it for the money. That he’d thought he was in love with her was secondary. But as the years pass, and Wade begins to understand that Shiklah doesn’t return that love, his eyes begin to wander elsewhere. Prince Peter of Spider was supposed to be a distraction, a momentary dalliance to fill the time. But it’s difficult for someone to be a momentary distraction if you can’t get them out of your head. What was meant to last a night turns into something much deeper. Soon, Wade must question what’s more important to him: loyalty to his word or loyalty to his heart.
Prince Peter of Spider is barely holding things together. With his wife murdered by a would-be usurper, his kingdom’s future was put into question for the first time in centuries. As the pressure mounts to find a new spouse and produce the heir that will assure his kingdom’s future and treaty negotiations between his tiny principality and King Anthony of Longueile heat up, Peter welcomes the distraction of Colonel Wilson of Monstropolis. But Peter finds himself still distracted even months later, and quickly must face the fact that he is in love. Can he find a way to secure happiness with another ruler’s consort, or will he be forced to marry out of duty and never truly know love again?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Your Heart’s in the Right Place (And So are the Furnishings)
Author: Doctoring
Artist: Moemai
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Word Count: ~25,800
Summary: I mean, friends to lovers is one thing, but roommate to lovers has that whole efficiency appeal to it.
Peter is thinking about moving when his lease is up. Wade makes it his mission to convince Peter to move in with him. However, there’s a lot of home makeover (and flirting) he needs to do first before his crush will even consider it.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: You Can’t Spell Awesome Without Me
Author: Pineau_noir/ @pineau-noir
Artist: Dropthebeet/ @albeenocookie
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No major warnings apply
Word Count: 25k
Summary: On Peter’s 30th birthday, he finds a red and black mark over his heart. Then, on his way to his teaching job at Empire State University, a heavily scarred man dies in Peter’s arms. The two things don’t seem connected until Peter’s Spidey Sense goes haywire and his AI, Janet, tells Peter about soul marks.
But soulmates are just an urban legend, like Reagan killing all the birds in 1986 and replacing them with spies, right?
Meanwhile, Wade is stuck in the hospital, after losing his favorite kidney and briefly being dead. He flirts with his cute nurse (Anthony), gives a false name (Thom Cruz), and learns to live without his precious righty (his kidney).
Peter and the Avengers are on the hunt for the slightly shady man who may or may not be Peter’s one-and-only until something unexpected brings them together.
Spoiler— it’s really dumb and ordinary but Wade lives for the drama of it all: car chases! Illegal drug rings! Exotic animal smuggling! Or as Peter tells it, patrolling and seeing cars go by, accidentally stealing a bottle of ibuprofen from Tony Stark, and finding a stray kitten.
Either way it’s going to be all the fluff and domestic Spideypool the author can manage.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Rock You Like a Hurricanrana
Author: Jennicide
Artist: Aredesification | @aredesification
Rating: E
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Word Count: 111K
Summary: Peter thinks he’s finally made it now that his masked persona, Spider-Man, has been offered a full-time contract with one of the largest wrestling companies in the United States. He’s spent years training for this moment but nothing could have ever prepared him for getting into the ring with Pileta de Muerto, the hottest heel in professional wrestling entertainment, on the night of his debut. And to make matters worse, their first meeting was a complete disaster. One of his biggest idols probably (definitely) hates him, but he’ll manage somehow because they’ve got a show to do and everything in wrestling is scripted anyway… until it isn’t.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Parker’s Monster
Author(s): Rainbow820
Artist: Alfie
Rating: Teen
Warnings: Graphic Descriptions of Violence
Word Count: 30k+
Summary: In the early twentieth century, world tension is at an all time high. A young university student in New York, Peter Parker, meets Wade Wilson, a military officer from Canada on a chance encounter as Wade looks to find his professor Doctor Connors.
America needs Doctor Connor’s work and Wade needs him, and Peter Parker wants to protect his professor. Wade finds something captivating in the student who feels the need to save everyone around him.
War rips through Europe and Wade has to leave with Doctor Connors, but Peter is not one to be left behind. Falling in love at the worst of times Peter will do anything to keep Wade with him, anything.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Bettas are just P®etty Assholes
Author(s): DefendersofMCUniverse (GeekMom13)
Artist: SpiderKatana
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Major Archive Warnings.
Minor Character Death, Mermaid anatomy,
Word Count: 8,644
Summary: Wade really loved his job- going around taking care of pointless mers and eating all the best food in the ocean. But he really, really hated Bettas. They were grumpy, conceited, and liked to get in his way far too much, even when they failed miserably. (They always failed, Wade just hated the superficial scars they left. Because, honestly, he already looked like Neptune’s left nutsack, did they need to make it worse?)
Really, how hard was it to just… let him kill the worthless mers of the pod? It’s not like he took on contracts for the productive members of pod-ciety.
It just figures that one assignment he meets a Betta-mer who changes everything.
Why the fuck did he have to be so pretty?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Cradle
Author: macaronigrille
Artist: nonexistenz
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Word Count: 8971
Summary: Peter’s encounters with Deadpool are initially only fleeting. He doesn’t know much about him, simply that he’s a trained mercenary for hire who’s nearly impossible to kill.
Impossible to kill, maybe. But as Peter spends more time with Wade, he realizes that Wade is not unbreakable. From broken fingers to head injuries, Peter teaches Wade how to be cared for, and Wade returns the favor when Peter needs him most.
(Or: 5 times that Peter helped Wade with his healing factor, and one time that Wade returned the favor.)
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Odds Aren’t in Our Favor
Author(s): NexusPhenomena/Nhrive
Artist: Chez
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Minor Character Death, Graphic Depiction of Violence
Word Count: 75k
Summary: What happens when the world is forced to sacrifice children in the name of order and justice? The Games are the result. Wade had never been lucky in life and as he made his way into District 12, fate showed him just how much they didn’t like him. Now scarred from his experiences, he must deal with helping the new tributes make their way through the games. Can he help keep one of them alive?
Peter has suffered so much in life as it is and when it’s finally his turn for the games, will he be able to make it out alive? What will he lose along the way or is there possibly anything to gain?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Neighborly
Author: DramamineOnTopOfMe
Artist: DrunkRat
Rating: Mature
Warnings: None that apply
Word Count: 9k
Summary: Peter’s finally moving out! And Wade Wilson helps him move in? Peter knows that Spiderman and Deadpool are now neighbors, but he can’t let anybody else find out. Especially not Wade! But for just how long can Peter keep his secret when there’s crime in his city and a mercenary next door?
Fic Masterpost || Art Masterpost
Title: on a genderbender
Author(s): Devral
Artist: Art Wolf
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: none
Word Count: 40k
Summary: While checking out one of Doc Ock’s warehouses to try to figure out what Doc is up to, Wade and Peter accidentally activate a machine that changes someone’s gender. Peter is the unlucky recipient of the change. Wade does his best to take care of Peter by stuffing as much food into him as possible and sneaking in some leg ogling while Peter works to get himself back to normal!
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: a world away
Author(s): silvyri
Artist: Limeonik
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Mild Self-Harm (it’s Wade), Temporary Character Death (it’s Wade again), some violence
Word Count: 35k
Summary: Peter is saved by a mysterious scarred stranger when a extraterrestrial stowaway causes the Avenjet to break apart mid-flight over the Pacific Ocean. Stranded on a deserted tropical island with the man who can’t seem to get the hang of verbal communication, Peter struggles with not knowing how his friends and family are faring in an alien infested New York, his growing feelings for the man he names Wade, and how Wade came to be on their little island in the first place.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: My Heart’s A Little F*cked On You
Author(s): Spiderkatana and Dr.FumblesMcStupid
Artist: Chez
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Explicit Language, Very Brief Major Character Death
Word Count: 26,000+
Summary: When Peter was forced to leave his childhood best friend (and first crush) behind, he didn’t think he’d ever see him again. He definitely wasn’t expecting Deadpool, the first person he'd really felt safe with since then– to be the same boy who gave him an over-sized Captain America hoodie, threw rocks at Flash Thompson, and used to calm Peter down by softly singing La Vie En Rose.
AKA The One With The Silver Unicorn Charm Necklace.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Behind Closed Doors
Author(s): crookedswingset
Artist: babyshawk
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Temporary Character Death (Wade), Police Corruption, Angst, Bad Decision Making, Happy Ending
Word Count: 140K
Summary: When the Benefactor arranges a successful hit against a cop in a Spider-Man suit, Peter Parker has one shot to go undercover, infiltrate the criminal’s operations, and shut them down for good. But, to do that, he needs to let everyone in his life think he’s really dead. Even Wade.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: there’s a fire in your eyes
Author: bisexualbarry
Artist: luminspidey
Rating: mature
Warnings: graphic depictions of violence
Word Count: 36k
Summary: When Peter moved to a boring town in Maine, he thought his life would be normal. Instead, he’s now being stalked by a creepy man with a wicked plan. Even after escaping him once already, Peter can’t go anywhere without feeling eyes on him.
Cue Wade, a man who’s a mystery from the start who has weird injuries that seem to heal right before Peter’s eyes. Along with him comes a ragtag family that don’t quite seem to match. The biggest reality check, though? Vampires are real and they live amongst humans.
Now Peter has to try his best not to get kidnapped (again) by an evil vampire who’s trying to assemble his own group of elemental controlling vampires. And Peter happens to have a very fiery presence.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: In Which Peter is Not Okay
Author: ladyamante
Artist: Gensyz
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: PTSD, Past rape/non-con, Violence, Suicidal ideation
Word Count: 55k
Summary: Peter has hit rock bottom. He is anxious all the time, he can’t get out of bed for days on end. He’s isolated himself from his friends and Aunt May. What happened with Skip was ages ago, and he’s Spider-Man now, so he should be fine, right?
One night, Peter finds himself at the top of a building, ready to jump, when an unlikely person steps in.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Five Years Grown
Author: 343EnderSpark & thelonebamf
Artist: thelazydrawer
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Bullying, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Homophobic Language, cliffhanger ending
Word Count: 137,096
Summary: Growing up in a New York City that has seen the likes of superheroes and extraterrestrials was never going to be easy, but finding a friend was sure to make the journey more fun. A young Peter and Wade meet and bond over their shared hobby of dumpster diving and a fast friendship forms between them. While Wade’s home life is complicated and downright abusive, he slowly finds a place among the Parkers, learning to trust Ben and May as he grows closer to Peter. Yet no relationship stays the same forever, and Wade’s sprouting feelings for Peter are at odds with the expectations people have for the two of them. Things only grow more complicated when Peter develops his spider powers, and is unsure whether or not he should confide in his friend. Of course nothing could keep the two apart for long… or could it?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: (life)lines
Author(s): Anhumblegoose
Artist: Cheermione
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Canon Typical Violence, Happy Ending
Word Count: 49k
Summary: When Wade takes home a callboy, he isn’t expecting to find his second chance at love. Now that it’s in front of him, he doesn’t want to let it go. He knows he can make his sweetie happy; that they can pull each other up. That is, if his baby boy’s insistence on keeping secrets doesn’t end up tearing them both down.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Big Enough Umbrella
Author(s): fancastical, aka @fasterthanmybullets
Artist: @the-italian-pasta, aka romeyruu
Rating: T
Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Child Abuse, Happy Ending
Word Count: 58k
Summary: Peter is high key miserable at the beginning of senior year. It takes everything he’s got to get out of bed sometimes, let alone go to school. It’s a problem, then, that the first person to make him laugh since Uncle Ben’s funeral is also the new school bully, a guy from Canada named Wade who steals money from freshmen and has no sense of propriety or, if the bruises he’s always showing up with mean anything, self preservation.
Wade doesn’t expect to stay in New York City long. His dad never lets them stick around after people start asking questions. So it really shouldn’t matter what the nerdy guy in his Spanish class thinks of him, and yet he’s bending over backward for even half a smile from Peter, and making all kinds of promises he’s not sure he can keep.
Wade knows it’s not gonna end well. But when has that ever stopped him before?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Rebound
Author: @evansenpai13
Artist: @Ninja46464
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Self-Doubt, Alcohol, Sexual Intercourse, Mature Themes
Word Count: 9K
Summary: Peter needs to see Wade. At 3 am. And the ever Spider loving Merc has no reason to deny the man he loves. Of course, it’s not as expected, why would it?
Peter B. Parker recently divorced his sweetheart Mary Jane and just as any distraught human being, needed someone to rely on. It just so happened that Wade was the one he confided on.
Matters become difficult when Peter believes Wade to behave oddly due to the loss of Vanessa. Though the present events are long after the incident, this belief clouds Peter’s judgment on what’s really happening.
Wade just couldn’t catch a break nor drop the feelings he had for the other. But Wade being Wade, did his best to get Peter out of the slump he was in. All while pushing aside the love Wade had for Pete. He would never be selfish enough to admit those feelings at such a sore time in Peter’s life. Or would he?
Give it time and a bit of alcohol, and what will happen once both men open up to one another? What’s Peter’s thoughts about the divorce? How will Wade help? Will Wade finally be honest? How will Pete react?
What will become of their relationship?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Careful What You Wish For
Author: @xbloodrunsredx
Artist: @sillytheotter
Rating: Not rated
Warnings: Referenced Past Non/Con, Slavery Undertones, Depression
Word Count: 15k
Summary: Wade Wilson is a mercenary that has had a rough life, but meeting a strange, powerful genie certainly puts things in perspective; through trials and memories, they struggle to find common ground… and there are too many questions that need answering before they can even try. But they can work it out—Wade knows it more than he’s ever known anything, even if the genie refuses to give up his name, or the past that hangs over him like a dark cloud. After all: he can just wish for it, can’t he?
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Two Lies and a Truth
Author: @salios
Artist: @sofreakinmanyfandoms
Rating: Teen
Warnings: Mild stalking
Word Count: ~6K
Summary: Having a thing for your teacher seemed like a reasonable fetish back in highschool. Personally, Peter hadn’t ever found a teacher worth pining after, but then again he’d had the saltiest, most sour, dried out educator-jerky the world had ever produced. There had definitely been fresher fish to cast after.
So again, while he understood it was a respectable and somewhat common kink, it wasn’t for Peter. He also realised, within three months as a TA, that it was super uncomfortable to be on the receiving end. Especially when you were being actively chased not by one, but two over eager students with no concept of personal space.
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
Title: Falling Backwards
Author(s): KiwiBerry
Artist: princessellie3
Rating: T
Warnings: Canon Typical Violence
Word Count: 7.4k
Summary: Peter loves being an Avenger. Or at least he thinks he does? It’s kind of hard to tell since he’s missing about four years of information after a run in with a mind-altering mutant. Luckily, he has two over protective, father-like figures to help him figure it all out. Oh, and a man in a red jumpsuit who keeps calling him “Spidey” with a fondness that almost rivals Aunt May. So, yeah, Peter loves being an Avenger (or at least he hopes he does. Mr. Stark would be so pissed if he didn’t.)
Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost
#spbb masterlist#spbb 2019#spideypool big bang#Spideypool#Spider-Man#Peter Parker#Deadpool#Wade Wilson#Marvel
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update
Did anyone ask for one? No. Does anyone want it? Probably not … I guess there’s still some small part of me that misses having a Livejournal.
In general, things have been - better. I started going outside a bit more from late-ish July, but honestly I don’t know if I started feeling better because I started going out, or if I started going out because I was feeling better…? A mystery. But mood tracking app - surely a reliable source of mental health info lmao - seems to agree:
(woohoo, only ‘significant burden’! i think that’s about the best you could hope for in 2020. and this was a few weeks ago, and I feel better now than I did then, so.)
I’ve been off work for the last 3 weeks - nothing wrong, just 2 weeks of scheduled annual leave, which I needed very much (I think part of why I was feeling bad was because I hadn’t had a break since February), and last week I had a week of jury duty. The break was much needed and I can feel the difference.
I started exercising again in July, and ugggggggh ok fine I admit I do feel better because of it. I’m never gonna be a gym bunny, I’ll probably never *love* it but I can’t deny the benefits. I go 3 times a week which is enough for me. (Though I only went twice last week and this week - last week I was pretty wrecked after court each day and this week I am focussing on being lazy.) Going outside again was strange at first, like the previous 4 months hadn’t happened, but it didn’t take long to feel (mostly) normal again.
I’ve also had a couple of social things, which has been nice - one lunch out at an outdoor restaurant, and one bbq at a friend’s house. (She moved in recently at the end of my street; while I was sitting in her living room I could look out of the window at my own flat. Weird!) I’ve been thinking a lot about Dan’s tweet about who he realised he wants in his life after lockdown, and it’s just. Interesting.
I’m DELIGHTED it’s September and the start of the best months, the -embers and -obers; it’s still pretty warm and mostly sunny here but it’s really nice, the bite’s gone out of the warmth. Not long now until it Gs the FO entirely. \o/ I’m still playing Animal Crossing every day, (unlike some people, smh poor abandoned Pickle).
Jury duty last week was fascinating. I didn’t even know if I’d get picked - they call more than twice as many people as they need in case anyone can’t do it for whatever reason (if one of the lawyers is a family friend or something), but I did end up being chosen. (No. 12!!) We were the first post-covid jury, and the first socially distanced one.
I *can* talk about the case now it’s over, but I don’t think I will, because the subject matter could be pretty triggering, but it was often a tough week given the nature of it. Having said that, something about it was very satisfying. It was fascinating to see how the courts and lawyers worked, and the whole process, and it was good to work with the other jurors. (Days on end of talking to actual humans was actually pretty good, for the most part.) We were all just thrown together, and we had differences of opinion of course, but it was still a good experience to work with them. It felt good to be part of something like that, something that mattered, and to feel like a part of the community in such a real way. I can be quite good at putting aside emotion to look at the letter of the law, which in a case like this can be very challenging; some of the other jurors struggled with it a great deal. (This isn’t to blow my own trumpet or anything; many would argue it was *me* who had the problem, in much the same way they often say lawyers are heartless, which isn’t true most of the time)
The case ended up being dismissed as the jury couldn’t reach a consensus - we got slated on social media (which of course I didn’t look at during the case, I caught up after), but we all stuck to our convictions and I know it was right; there’s a lot the public didn’t know or understand. As tough a case as it was, I’m glad I got to do it, it was a privilege in many ways. (But, I wouldn’t mind if it was a long time until I had to do it again, you know? lol.)
We had our phones taken from 9-5 while we were working - it’s the law - and I thought it was gonna be the worst after being glued to it constantly, but it was actually quite nice lmao. Not that I didn’t end up glued to it again once the case was over.
Fandom-wise, I have - finally - ended up taking a step back from the phandom a little bit in the last month or two. I want to talk about that a bit because it’s a complicated topic, and I see a lot of concerning posts - mainly on Twitter - that if you don’t maintain a certain level of dedication, if you join another fandom or get into something else or aren’t sufficiently devoted and supportive you - aren’t a true fan? Or something? Lots of posts along the lines of, ‘all these people getting into kpop/tv show/whatever, smh, don’t think we won’t remember when dan’s project drops and you all come running back’. It’s just a bit - weird? Like, it’s *perfectly normal* if people get into other stuff while dnp are cooking whatever they’re cooking (or not cooking, or whatever)? Or just move on, but still enjoy D&P?
I’m not, like, dramatically leaving the fandom or anything. Hell, I haven’t *left* the fandom at all, I’m still here every day, it’s - more of a mental shift. Because prior to July/August-ish this year I really wasn’t in a good place with it. I wrote a thing earlier this year about struggling with writing, and belonging while not being a content creator, and other things … the issue is that, as I tend to do with my fandoms, I get too overinvested. And sometimes, that’s okay - whatever gets you through the night and all that - but in this case, I wasn’t enjoying it any more. Some parts I was - I’ve made the best friends I’ve ever had in a fandom here, and I really like seeing everyone on here - but in general, I was spending a lot of my time feeling anxious, resentful, worried, angry and frustrated. I spent a lot of last year and almost all of this one waiting for Godot; hating the “new normal” and desperately waiting for - something that’s never going to come. I just couldn’t deal with it; probably for reasons bigger than just D&P but that’s how it manifested. I got more and more frustrated by the content we were getting because it wasn’t what I’d hoped, and I hated feeling like that. It took up way too much of my thoughts and every day was just waiting, and wondering, and worrying. And I got so, so sick of it.
So, where am I now? Well, it was inevitable really, but I just started to - let go, a bit. I didn’t throw my hands up and go, ’bah, screw these guys!’, my mental focus just shifted (for my own good), and I started focussing on other things. Other fandoms. Games and hobbies I can distract myself with. I’ll admit it wouldn’t necessarily have been my *choice*, you know? But reality is what it is and I’m - relieved, really, that I’m not unnecessarily tormenting myself about it any more. It took me a long time to reach this place - too long, really - and, for now at least, it’s kind of nice. I can just enjoy things if/when they pop up without the accompanying sadness and anger about how everything is changed, about what has ended and what I’ve “lost”. (And it’s not 100%, by the way; it’s still there, just - quiet, now.) I can look at, I dunno, someone’s gifs of Dan or whatever, and just smile about it rather than feeling that grief. (Or, feel it, but not to the exclusion of everything else.) It’s - nicer.
And it isn’t at *all* that I don’t care any more, I still love them, of course I do, and will continue to follow them and watch everything they do. I’m not going anywhere. I still have notifs on, though they don’t quite send my heart into my throat like they did. ;) In a way it’s helping me love them more, because now when I watch them I enjoy it more, appreciating the fun and the bants without laser-focussing on my own anger and sadness. I’m still attending our little daily phannie watch-alongs, where we watch a couple of eps of DAPG and an anime. I’m still on phandom tumblr/twitter on the daily. It just - has a slightly smaller portion of my brain and mental energy now.
It was a step I needed to take, but also one I’m not sure I could have *chosen* to take, not without deliberately leaving and cutting it all off completely? And I didn’t want to do that. I’d hoped I’d get to this place earlier than this - some 20 months after the fact - but better late than never, I suppose.
(Also, disclaimer - fandom and the human heart are funny things, and I fully accept I can and probably will be sucked completely back in at any time.)
Anyway! SEE YOU AT THE QUIZ :D
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Summary: When life moves on, you’ve got to decide who you want to move forward with you.
Pairing: Tyler x Reader
Word Count: 1320
Warnings: None?
Square Filled: Sunday Best - Augustana for @bandombingo
A/N: Guess who’s back and betta than eva! (Sorry, I had to.) I don’t know about better than ever, but I am back with a new fic - my first for Bandom Bingo! I also have jury duty this week, which I’m hoping will allow for lots of writing time, since I’m allowed to have my laptop when I’m in the assembly room. Hope everyone is doing well, enjoy this little fic!
It happened on a Friday. They were sitting on Y/N’s front porch after hanging out with some friends, waiting for their energy to wind down enough to want to sleep. Tyler was watching her, but her mind was a million miles away.
“What are you thinking?” he asked, nudging her with his elbow.
Y/N’s attention snapped back to home. “The ocean. I know there are places where the ocean is chilly, but in my mind, it’s always warm. The sun is always shining, and everything is peaceful and content.”
“What about hurricanes?” Tyler countered.
She laughed and his heart beat faster. “Okay, so sometimes it’s cold and sometimes it’s chaotic. Things here have felt so insane lately. Running isn’t the answer, but maybe I’m not thinking of running. Maybe I’m thinking of starting over.”
Tyler couldn’t fault her for that. Her world had been turned upside down in the last few months. She had found a new normal, and he hadn’t left her side once during the process, but that didn’t mean the trouble was forgotten. Tyler’s mind was dark and chaotic at times, too. Their bond had strengthened over an abundance of big life questions and a lack of a healthy amount of sleep.
“I can’t wait for the next thing to start,” Tyler sighed, leaning back on his hands and imagining all the shows he and Josh had scheduled to play over the next few months. “It’s all right here, but I wouldn’t mind a distraction for a while.”
“You and me both,” Y/N responded quietly.
He thought about asking her to come along, and that was the moment Tyler realized he loved her.
A week later, she rushed up the stairs to his room where he was playing silly melodies on the keyboard near the window. She held up an airplane ticket in front of him; Tyler set his headphones to the side and powered off the keyboard.
“Boston? I thought you wanted warmth and the ocean and stuff?”
Y/N looked down at the ticket and shrugged. “I decided to buy a ticket to somewhere and Boston was the first place that came to mind. So that’s what I decided to do.”
Tyler held his hand out for the ticket, a smile pasted on his face. He wanted to be excited for her. He read over the words on the ticket, raising his brow when he saw a certain condition on the ticket.
“One-way, huh?”
“Don’t lecture me like my parents did, all right? What if I can’t get back, blah, blah, blah. What if I don’t want to come back? It sucks here! Everything is falling apart, everything’s been falling apart! I hate it! I hate it here!”
Y/N had gone from excited and happy to scared and upset faster than Tyler could keep up with. One minute she was practically jumping up and down with joy and the next she was crying and screaming.
“Hey, I wasn’t going to say any of that,” Tyler assured, tossing the ticket onto the keyboard and pulling her against his chest. He held her tight around the shoulders, but her arms stayed straight at her sides. “I was surprised, is all. You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do, Y/N/N. I’m on your side in this. I’m always on your side.”
“I know,” she whispered, sniffling herself back into some state of composed.
Though she seemed okay, Tyler continued to hold her. He rocked her gently back and forth until, finally, she worked her arms up between them, threw her arms around his neck, and held on for dear life.
They were both set to leave on a Tuesday. Funny, Tyler thought to himself, how life sometimes came full circle that way. He planned to spend Monday with his family for the most part, so if he was going to do this, it had to be today.
Maybe there wasn’t a point in telling her that he loved her. He had one foot out of Columbus for a short time, and she had no idea if or when she was going to come back. Tyler knew that part of him thought that confessing to her would give her a reason to come back. Really though, he knew that if he didn’t tell her how he felt, he would regret it for the rest of his life.
So, here he was after a post-church lunch with his family, knocking on her front door. He chewed on his thumbnail while he waited for someone to let him in the house, anxiety and determination battling it out within him. Fortunately, determination was still winning out.
“Hey, Tyler,” her father greeted, holding the screen door open, “c’mon in. Y/N’s downstairs, I think.”
“Thanks,” Tyler replied, smiling politely before heading for the familiar staircase.
Y/N was laid out on the couch, fast asleep. She was dressed in one of her favorite dresses, one she reserved only for church specifically because it was one of her favorites. Tyler never quite understood her logic behind that, but he didn’t pretend to understand much about dresses, anyway.
He took a seat next to her, running his fingers lightly through her hair. She didn’t move. He completed the gesture a couple more times, then put his hand back in his lap.
“Keep doing that,” she mumbled, a sleepy smile pulling at her lips.
Tyler smiled, too. He waited for her to stretch and sit up, be able to keep her eyes open. She took the throw blanket form the back of the couch and pulled it over her legs, then pulled her knees up to her chest.
“Did we have plans and I forgot?” Y/N asked him.
“No, no, I came by uninvited,” Tyler admitted. “I wanted to talk to you.”
Her face fell. “Is everything all right?”
Tyler nodded emphatically and took her hands in his. “Yes, everything is great. It’s just — you’re leaving. And I’m leaving. And I’m coming back but you don’t know if you are … anyway. I don’t know why I feel like I need to say any of this, except for selfish reasons, I guess.”
He paused there, and Y/N nodded. “Okay, so … tell me?”
Tyler took a deep breath. “I love you. I — I had this whole speech that I repeated, like, five times on the way over, but now all I can do is say that. I wanted you to know, I guess.”
She stared at him for a long time. Long enough that Tyler let go of her hands and stood, ready to apologize and explain himself. Y/N threw the blanket off of her legs and stood too, grabbing for his hands as she went up on tiptoe to press a soft kiss to his lips.
“I love you too, Ty.”
Tyler allowed himself a moment of shock before twirling her off the floor and kissing her again.
With a tour in full swing for Tyler, and Y/N living life in Boston, staying in touch wasn’t always easy. They called when they could, texted at least once a day. But, Tyler’s favorite part of their communications was the postcards that would sometimes arrive before him at the hotel where they were staying. Today when they checked in, the clerk handed him a key and a postcard with the Boston skyline depicted on the front — there was always some sort of landmark on the postcard. He waited until they got to the hotel room and he could lean back against the pillows and read about her latest adventure to flip the postcard over; he was surprised to see only a much shorter message than he expected. The postcard was dated from the Sunday prior.
Last night, I dreamed about hugging you. This morning, I bought another one-way ticket. To Columbus.
Love Always,
Y/N
#bandombingo-r1#twenty one pilots#tyler#tyler joseph#fanfiction#reader#reader insert#tyler x reader#tyler joseph x reader#augustana#sunday best
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ckerouac replied to your post
“what is your favorite episode from your least favorite season of glee?...”
Ok I love this question, but 1, this is cooper Anderson erasure and 2, I think S8 is way less trash than you do lol
I know - I did think about Cooper - and Big Brother is definitely a highlight, but as whole episodes, I like the other two more :(
Okay - let’s break down season 8 and see how bad (or alright) it really is! I’d love to hear your opinions on it, RB! (Clearly this is my life now)
The List - Robert splits the staff in half on some random list that he made. I think it’s a pretty decent episode, which reintroduces the characters pretty well. Plus, we get some great Pam stuff, so I’m okay with that.
The Incentive - Andy has to motivate the office. Another episode which isn’t that bad, despite being a plot line already done by Michael Scott.
Lotto - The warehouse wins the lotto, and Darryl has to rethink his life choices. There’s some good Darryl development in here, and Andy isn’t that bad as a manager - but he’s not great, and it does feel like they keep trying to give Andy plots originally for Michael Scott, which doesn’t help.
Garden Party - This is the first episode that starts to bug me. Andy’s obsessive need to impress Robert as well as his parents is incredibly irritating. However, this episode does get a few points for having a fun Dwight/Jim subplot.
Spooked - This one is... interesting? Robert asks everyone about their fears and laces it all together for a bizarre scary story. It’s strange, but definitely watchable.
Doomsday - Dwight creates a doomsday device! I really wish they had gone more with the tension of not screwing things up, but it’s more about getting Dwight to turn it off. Not a bad episode despite not being what I initially thought it’d be. And better on rewatch.
Pam’s Replacement - Pam’s pregnant and worried about Jim being interested in her replacement. Shenanigans ensue -- favorite one!
Gettysburg - I think this episode is boring more than anything. Andy gets half the group to go to Gettysburg for a motivational trip. Not only is a questionable Michael Scott plotline, they already kind of did this during The Incentive. There’s a fun side plot involving Schrute Farms, however it’s not balanced out by the stupid side plot of Robert thinking Kevin is the next big genius. (Also Pam leaves because Jenna Fischer went on maternity leave, and that might be a reason I think these episodes get worse for a while.)
Mrs. California - This episode is where I think the season starts to turn really not good. Robert’s wife comes into the office -- he wants Andy to hire here but not hire her. It’s so dumb - especially when his wife seems totally normal. The mind games seem stupid, and make Robert seem insane instead of mysteriously clever - which seemed to be what they originally going for. Meanwhile, Dwight has the dumbest side plot about starting a gym -- which makes it clear the writers seemed to be running out of ideas.
Christmas Wishes - The Christmas episodes aren’t usually that bad, and this one isn’t. There’s a little too much drunk Erin getting weird about Andy and his girlfriend, but it’s watchable. And there’s some fun Dwight/Jim stuff going on throughout.
Trivia - This is an episode I’m disappointed isn’t more interesting than it sounds. The gang goes to Oscar’s gay bar for trivia night. It’s another watchable one - but there’s so much more they could have done with it.
Pool Party - This episode is fuckin’ weird. Everyone goes to Robert’s weird house for a pool party and everyone is just... weird during it. Except Jim, who just wants to leave. I don’t really like it cause it focuses way too hard on Dwight, Erin, and Robert, and it’s not necessarily weird in a good way since half of them don’t feel in character.
Jury Duty - This one is, fine, I suppose. Jim tries to make it up to the office for being gone for a week, and Dwight deals with Angela having her baby. I’m kinda annoyed at this point that the writers no longer take Jim very seriously, and he’s consistently written as a dumbass, and the Angela/Senator thing would be better if it didn’t drag on and on and on, but at least this one doesn’t focus too much on Robert/Andy/Erin shit.
Special Project - This one kicks off the Florida arc, which is...idk, maybe a step up from the rest of the season? This episode is pretty good as it sorts out who is going and who is staying, and Pam’s back!
Tallahassee - The first episode actually in Florida. I’m meh about it. Dwight gets really sick, and there’s some gross stuff going on there. And we get the intro to Nelly, whom I find frustrating during her tenure in season 8 (she’s fine in season 9), and Todd Packer’s around again, which always annoys me. The Scranton stuff is fine - as Andy is receptionist for a day.
After Hours - This one is mostly fine. I love the plot line where Jim has to keep away from Cathy and uses Dwight to help him out. The rest of it is meh as a lot of it is Nelly and Todd Packer being weird together, Ryan hitting on Erin, and a lot of Darryl and Val drama that isn’t as interesting as it could be.
Test the Store - The Florida story is pretty good where the store down there opens, and there’s some interesting things going on. But I hate the subplot about Andy and Pam being bullied by 12yo girls. HATE IT
Last Day in Florida - This one is, idk, another meh-ish one? Jim is trying to stop Dwight getting fired, and while I love the dynamic, maybe not one of their better story lines. Meanwhile Toby and Darryl are selling girl scout cookies, and it’s incredibly boring. Also, Erin decides to stay in Florida to help an elderly woman - and this kicks off the WORST run in the show. I’d rather watch Scott’s Tots again than the next three episodes...
Get the Girl - I HATE THIS EPISODE. Andy goes back to get Erin -- and ends up staying with the elderly woman Erin’s with to woo her back. It’s so cringy, and both Andy and Erin seem like dumber and more annoying than they usually are. Meanwhile - while Andy’s gone, Nellie just comes and takes over Andy’s job. And as much as I hate Andy and Erin at the moment, I hate that his job is just given to Nellie because she decides to sit in the manager’s office. It’s so dumb. Every part of this episode is dumb and it probably is the worst episode in the series.
Welcome Party - Continuing the terrible plot lines of season 8, now that Andy and Erin are back together - they have to go dumb Andy’s not at all developed girlfriend while she’s at a family gathering. It’s so, so terrible and awful. And makes Andy and Erin seem like the worst people. This seems far worse than anything Michael Scott ever did. Meanwhile, Dwight and Jim are forced to throw a party for Nellie - which is at least watchable, but Nellie is still fairly annoying at this point, too.
Angry Andy - The Andy and Nellie plot lines come to a head, which you know just by the description isn’t going to go well. Andy gets angry and terrible, Nellie is still insufferable, and Robert is no longer making any sense at all. The climax of these stupid episodes is just as bad as the rest of it. The only redeeming factor of this episode is the subplot involving Kelly choosing between Ryan and an actual decent guy, and everyone helping Kelly try to move on from Ryan.
Fundraiser - While this episode is at least better than the past three, I find it mostly boring. The office goes to a silent auction - yay(?) No, it’s boring. Andy spends the whole time plotting revenge against Robert for firing him. Dwight seems uncharacteristically stupid about the auction. And Darryl teaches Nellie how to eat a taco (yes that is a plot line) and Angela’s husband hits on Oscar.
Turf War - This episode is probably the first fully good episode since Special Project? Robert’s going crazy, and closing down branches, so Dwight and Jim go against other branches to steal clients. It’s nice to see Dwight and Jim work together. Pam gets to know Nellie - and Nellie’s at least tolerable in the episode?
Free Family Portrait Studio - Considering that most of the season is rough, this one isn’t bad, though probably one of the weakest season finales. Dwight schemes to figure out if he’s the father of Angela’s baby - and we’re left on that cliffhanger. Meanwhile, David Wallace is back as CEO, and gives Andy his job back, and while it’s nice that Robert is leaving (and Sabre is going away), the writing for the show is on the wall.
So, looking at this list and thinking about it. The biggest issue is that there’s so much Andy and so much Erin and so much of their terrible romance that it grows tiresome really fast. Meanwhile, Robert California is a bizarre addition that doesn’t quite fit. Nor does Nellie, whom it’s obvious the writers like, but aren’t sure how to use her well. Meanwhile, Dwight, Jim, and Pam don’t feel very present nor do any of them have many memorable plot lines, and it doesn’t help that the writers seem to be stuck in dummy-Jim mode, as well as Pam just not being there for half the season.
And... there we go, too much time spent on season 8.
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Viva Cuba
y/n’s POV
I knocked on the Alvarez's door, while Schneider stood next to me holding a chair.
Penelope opened the door and Schneider and I walked in.
"Hey, guys, you're in luck. I finally found a vintage store that had a chair that matches your dining set." Schneider said
"Why do we need an extra chair?" Penelope asked
"It's not really extra. There's six of us." He said putting the chair down at the table
They all gasped
"I know. It's not a perfect match. But it's hardly the sorest thumb in this room." He said
"Not the chair! What the hell are you wearing?" Penelope asked
"Oh crap." I said noticing who was on his shirt
"Oh. Che Guevara? Yeah. Viva la revolución, am I right?" He said
"You are wrong." Lydia said
"Do you have any idea.." Alex started
"I got this. Do you have any idea..." Elena said
"Kids, relax. Do you have any idea what this comemierda did?" Penelope asked
"Grew an awesome beard and modeled for T-shirts?" Schneider asked
"Oh, Wow." I said sitting down
"First of all, He wasn't even Cuban!" Penelope said
"He was Castro's right hand man." Lydia said
"He burned books. He banned music. He personally oversaw execution squads. He was a mass murder." Elena said
"But..He has a cool hat." Schneider said
"It's like if you walked into a Jewish home wearing a Hitler shirt." Penelope said
"Or into Taylor Swift's home wearing a Kanye shirt." I said
"Oh, my god! You guys, I am so sorry! I had no idea." He said taking off his shirt
"We forgive you, Schneider. We know that sometimes you are a bobo and don't know what you're doing." Lydia said hugging him
She started rubbing his chest and I had to look away.
"Okay, now I kind of miss the shirt." Penelope said
__________
Alex, Schneider, Lydia, and I were in the living room so Alex could interview her for his project on Cuba.
"So I had to flee Cuba and come here to America. Your abuelo and I were separated for years before we found our way back into each other's arms. There was an earthquake the day we reunited and I am convinced that the passion of our embrace moved the Earth." Lydia said
Alex and ended the recording.
"Not sure the science checks out, but who cares? That was beautiful." Schneider said
"Oh. Gracias." Lydia said
"What are you doing?" Schneider asked getting on Alex's face
Alex looked at him confused.
"History is coming alive before your eyes! And that's too small a camera for too big a star!" Schneider said
"What?" I asked
"Keep talking." Lydia said
"You're so luck she's here. I know nothing about my grandparents and I never will! And they live in Pasadena! I mean, the traffic's just...Anyway, this is a huge opportunity for you. With the right production value, this might qualify for a Student Academy Award. Oh, yeah. The Soscars? It's a thing." Schneider said
"I could win a trophy? Something for the Alvarez Museum besides my teeth?" Alex asked
"Wait, What?" I said
"Don't forget your umbilical cord." Lydia said
"What the hell kind of museum is this?" I questioned
"I'm gonna make a movie! I'll write a script, cast it, edit it.... Wait, am I making more work for myself?" Alex asked
I laughed
"Am I excited about it? Is this what it's like to be Elena?" He asked
"I will start my beauty regime now. I will be ready at dawn."
"Okay, but we have to go to school." Alex said
"Oh, good. Cause dawn was pushing it." Lydia said getting up and leaving
"Okay. So we're doing this tomorrow afternoon? Ah, I was supposed to have jury duty, but you know what? I'm just gonna call my guy. This is more important." Schneider said
Me and Alex laughed
Schneider was about to leave, when he opened the door and Penelope walked in.
"Oh, Hey, Pen. Do you have a 50-foot extension cord and some dry ice? You know what? I'll make a run to the depot." He said leaving
"Do I wanna know?" She asked us
"Tomorrow, I'm filming the whole family for my Cuba project. It's a lot of extra work, but I'm really excited. What is happening to me?" He said
Alex and I walked to his room.
___________
The next day, Alex, Schneider, and I were in the living room, setting up for the movie.
"Isn't this better? A good camera, proper lighting, and a cast in wardrobe." Schneider said
Elena walked out in a sparkly dress and a fruit hat
"I look like a fruit salad." She said
"I look like cousin Consuelo." Penelope said walking out in farmer clothes and a beard.
"Don't let the beard throw you. It actually looks really natural." Alex said
Penelope walked in front of the green screen.
"Lights, camera......talk now!" I said
"I am a farmer. I grow coffee beans. One of Cuba's most important exports. I work everyday from sunrise to sunset. But I am happy with my simple life." Penelope said
"Cut! Can we do it again? It doesn't really seem like you're a farmer." Alex said
"Cause I'm not really a farmer." She said
"It's not to late to recast." Schneider said
"You auditioned and you didn't get the part. Move on, man." I said
Okay, Elena, you're up." Alex said
"Great. But I have some notes on the script." She said
"Oh, here we go. I hate it when the talent has thoughts." Schneider said
"What are you trying to say about Cubans? You're making us out to be a total stereotype. We're not this different from everyone else." Elena said
"Elena, get over this diversity thing. A committee of people think you're a smart Latina, and they wanna help you achieve your dreams. How is this not a good thing?" Penelope asked
I knew they were going to fight, so I tuned out their conversation.
I zoned back in when it was Lydia's turn.
"Abuelita, you're up." Alex said
She dramatically opened the curtains.
"Oh, hello. I didn't se you there. It is I, Lydia Riera, the most famous dancer in Cuba. I can do flamenco, salsa, mambo, pachanga, and the Funky Chicken." She said
She danced to the couch and sat down.
"Okay. Time for your story. Make me laugh. Make me cry. Get me an A." Alex said
"Well, when I was in Cuba...the people would line up for blocks and blocks just to see me. I was the IPhone of my time. But then Castro took over. My family was forced to flee. And that's when I came to America." She said
"Oh, you know what would be good? Talk about being one of the Pedro Pan kids." He said
"Ah! Pedro Pan was a program that during the revolution to fly children out of Cuba and give them safe haven in the United States until Castro left." She said
"Okay.. so you were put on a plane to a new country where you didn't know the language?" I asked
"Oh, yes." She said
"Without your parents?" Alex asked
"Yes." She said
"And you were Elena's age, which would have made Tia Maruchi my age? And Mimi would've been really young." Alex said
"Yes." Lydia said
"Wow, Abuelita. I can't even imagine. That must have been so hard, taking care of your sisters, since you were the oldest." Alex said
Lydia stopped talking
"Mami, are you Okay?" Penelope asked
"Ah..you know, I am sorry. I'm a little tired. I'm sorry, papito." Lydia said tearing up and walking to her room.
We all looked at each other. I pat Alex on the back.
___________
Later, we were all standing in front of the curtain, listening to Abuelita tell Penelope about her older sister.
I held Elena's and Alex's hand.
Penelope opened the curtain and we all sighed.
"So, I guess you heard everything?" Penelope asked
"It's just a curtain." Schneider said
Elena went into her room to talk to her.
Why they were talking, I slowly grabbed my bag and went back to Schneider's apartment.
I couldn't stand to hear people talking about losing their family.
________________
Later, I was sitting on the couch when their was a knock on the door.
I got up from the couch, and opened the door to find Alex.
"Hey." I said letting him in
"Hey." He said
"Is Lydia okay?" I asked
"She's fine, we actually finished the movie. Are you okay?" He asked
"I'm fine, why do you ask?" I said
"Well, you kinda walked off." He said
"Her story just made me sad." I said
"It reminds you of someone else's story?" He asked knowingly
"A little." I said
_________
The next day, we were all gathered in the Alvarez living room to watch Alexa movie.5
We all clapped after it finished.
"Oh, Lydia, I'm so thrilled to be your date at the premiere of the greatest story ever filmed." Dr. B said
"Oh, Leslie, you exaggerate. Date" Lydia said
"That was great, Alex." I said
"Thanks. And I finally have my contribution to the Alvarez Museum. My script with and A-plus on the cover." He said
We all cheered
"And don't forget your signed headshot of the producer." Schneider said
"That's not going on my wall." Penelope said
"We'll See." Schneider said
"Uh.. but I may have something to add to the wall soon. After giving it a lot of thought... I have decided to go back to school to become—" she started
"No, no, no! Don't become a doctor! Please, I've been regretting it ever since we talked. I'm so sorry I inspired you." Dr. B said
"Relax, Doc. You didn't inspire me. They did. I'm not gonna be a doctor. I'm gonna be a nurse practitioner. It's all the things that excite me about being a doctor, but the training takes a fraction of the time, and it still comes with a pretty sweet salary bump." She said
We clapped for her
"Hey, maybe we could both be nurse practitioners. Nah, I couldn't. I enjoy the white coat too much." Doc said
"Nps get a white coat." She said
"Son of a bitch!" He said+
__________
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Part two of Zoyalai kid as promised
Here’s part one- https://dablackdahlia.tumblr.com/post/650586205772201984/the-black-dahlia
Massive row spoilers
Prince Mycanae Juris Nazyalensky( My Kuh Nay Uh) was turning one years old
It was suprising how quickly he grew up
To Nikolai at least
For Zoya, who adored her son couldn’t wait for him to get older
For one thing while the baby didn’t cry to much at night (whitch was a blessing from the saints)
He couldn’t be Grisha tested
Most ravkans were tested around the age of seven though it varies
Myca was far to young
It was decided when he turned four he would be tested
And so the country was forced to wait four long years
Three more years to go Zoya thought to herself
Myca was an easy baby
That was what his doctors said
He barely if ever cried in the night and was sociable enough
Unlike Genya and David’s son Forrest Kostyk who from all of Zoyas interactions and everything Genya and David mentioned he was a nightmare
Constantly screaming
Hates to eat everything
And now that His teeth were a big enough size he started biting
She had gotten lucky
But Nikolai and her started talking about having more kids
And Zoya found she wanted more aswell
Nikolais pitch however would be far to amusing for her to not listen to
“Come on Zoya only children are the freaks in the playground!” Nikolai said gesturing incredulously
They just gotten Myca put to bed and were having much needed glasses of wine
He needed his rest for his birthday tomorrow
Even though they could’ve had many nannies take care of him that night, neither of them wanted that
Nikolai grew up like that and he wasn’t as close to his mother because of it.
Not to mention the old king was scarce most of his early upbringing
Zoya didn’t want that for Myca either
Of course with all of there duties they had to get some help but they always, always, made sure they put him to bed in the room across from there’s
“Nikolai I’m an only child” zoya retorted
“Touché, but what if something were to happen that Myca couldn’t become king? We would need another option!” Nikolai threw back
Nikolai having another realization
“Plus, it would’ve really helped me growing up to have a good sibling”
This was something Zoya thought about aswell
As a girl she wished for a baby sister
And so did her mother
Sabina had four miscarriages
The last one was the worst
She was safely in the third trimester when it happened
Sabina was distraught for weeks
And when she finally came to, she was different
Harder
Sadder
Meaner
And a couple years later marching Zoya down an aisle
“You know I’m already convinced Nikolai right?” Zoya laughed tired of this charade
Before Myca was born Zoya thought she’d have one
One child
One heir
But she had changed her mind and wanted more
Nikolai showed her a dazzling smile “perfect” he said with a kiss
Zoyas second pregnancy was different
Her morning sickness wasn’t as bad as her first
But a new thing has arrived
cravings
She was consuming unhealthy amounts of Ravkan chocolates
But nonetheless the baby’s due date was July eighth
The date came and passed
But it was nothing to be worried about
There was a lot of moments where they were like “this Is it, the babies coming” then nope
Zoya was 43 weeks pregnant
The baby would be post term
Nikolai would say this is a sign that this child was going to Be late for everything
A difference when Myca was born on the exact due date
But in the middle of the night July twenty second Zoya went into Labor
There second child was Prince Nazariy (Nah-Zuh-ree) Dominik Nazyalensky
He had Brown skin almost darker then Zoya’s and black hair
But it was his eyes that captivated people
He had sectoral heterochromia
His Blue eyes like his Mothers had parts of brown (example below)
They decided on his middle name after Nikolais friend Dominick after some rigorous debate
Zoya wanted to continue with Saint middle names
Nikolai argued Juris was a personal friend
In the end with Nikolais charisma he won
His name Nazariy was actually found in a simple baby book
While Mycanae was in old ravkan and they liked the nickname Myca
They were much more lax with there second son
They eventually decided to have four kids but wanted to wait until Myca would get tested before having there next two children
Time skip three years because your girl can’t detail everything
Myca was four years old and today was the day
He was dressed in his best clothes
What would happen is he would go up in front of the entirety of the Ravkan nobility and other ambassadors and such and would get tested
Zoyas power still couldn’t sense anything in him or Nazariy, but a couple months prior Forrest Kostyk was revealed to be an Alkemi
It seemed that when the grisha first used there ability it activates something and typically Zoya could sense it
Because now Zoya could see Forrest as an Alkemi easily
So while she couldn’t sense anything in her sons that didn’t mean there was nothing there
Zoya and Nikolai had finally gotten most of the details finished and it was them, Nazariy and Myca, and the triumvirate working out some details in the meeting room
Well, Nazariy was pretending he was a squaller by blowing on some paper
And Myca was clearly trying to convince him that wasn’t how it worked
It seemed Myca hadn’t quite grasped his two year old little brother couldn’t care less about what he thought
A fact that would never change over the years
“I don’t understand why we don’t just test him right here right now?” Adrik insisted for the ninth time “less risk”
“And then what if he turns out to be Grisha but presented before the nobility nothing happens? The grisha test only works when they just start out” Tamar responded
“It could still work in front of the nobility” Adrik insisted
“And if all else fails we can just tell him to summon a gust” Tolya added
Tolya was fiercely protective of the boys
It probably started when a couple months ago Myca showed a vague interest in his favorite Poet and the friendship bloomed
“Tolya most summoners can’t summon until days of practice” Leoni interjected “Plus, we’ve made plans on all outcomes and it’s to late to change them now, look on the bright si-”
“Nazariy spit that out!” Zoya interupted
Apparently the little hellhound put one of David’s nails in his mouth
Nazariy, learning his mother wasn’t to be trifled with quickly on, spit it out
Back to the conversation they started on a topic healthy debated
“There’s no way the kid is Grisha!” Adrik started on
“But Adrik he hasn’t gotten sick. And Grisha dont get sick to!” Leoni countered
This back and forth started since Zoya announced her pregnancy
It was a headache really
But when she turned towards the three boys who had come to mean the world to her it was all worth it
Nikolai was with the boys and was apparently taking on Nazariy’s side claiming him blowing on the paper was just as credible as Mommy’s lightning
Myca fought back and claimed any otkaxatsya could do that
It was something happening more often
Myca makes an offhand statement and Nikolai fighting the other side
It was adorable really how Mycas eyes would light up and debate with his father
Plus it would make him think more critically and would make a good king out of him
Not to mention how it really helped Nikolai and him bond
Nikolai and him had some trouble sometimes
Myca doesn’t usually respond to jokes
It seemed after his silly and rambunctious troublemaker of a brother was born he decided he would have to be serious enough for the both of them
Or at least as serious as a four year old could be
But rigourous debate on whether or not green looked good on Nazariy was something they both seemed to enjoy
And as much as Zoya wished she could watch forever it was time
Time to see if her baby boy had certain talents
Myca was scared
He was behind the door waiting to be presented before his mother, father, brother, who would all be seated on the thrones, and of course the rest of the nobility
‘People like you Myca!’ Nikolai would insist ‘there’s nothing to worry about no matter what happens!’
Myca thought he was trying to alleviate the pressure but it wasn’t working
Suddenly his que to come In was called and he walked in
Head held high and posture immaculate he waltzed through the door
The person who was testing him was the Baron of Banewood
An old man who hated nonsense, children, and Prince Nazariy since he was both of those things
He came forward and after some very boring speeches that Myca couldn’t bring himself to listen to until the Baron told him to stick out his hand
Myca complied and the baron produced a very big pin
Guess everyone wanted to be really sure he was Grisha or not
His eyes wandered to his family
Theyre faces looked calculatingly impassive
He knew it was a front
They needed to seem stable for the people
Nazariy who was standing next to the throne was having difficulties standing still
Myca felt bad for him
Half of being royalty is sitting still looking pretty
He trained his eyes back on his parents and saw his father give him a small wink
I got this, I’m prepared for the result, I can do this
As the pin was stabbed into his skin Myca felt it
That calling
That thing begging to come out whenever he saw his Mother doing something grand
Or when he really wanted his brother to leave him alone
And Myca let it overcome him
When he opened his eyes he could see the Baron knocked over and a small breeze
A firm hand clamped his shoulder
“Congratulations Mycanae” Tolya started dragging him away from the scene where the nobility were discussing the scene “Your a Squaller”
Hey so part two of the Zoyalai kid as promised. This was originally gonna be longer but then It became a 230 word monster and i cut it down and will save the rest for part three
35 likes and I’ll make part three
#crooked kingdom#jesper fahey#kaz brekker#shadow and bone netflix#six of crows#six-of-crows#inej ghafa#shadow and bone#soc#soc inej#zoyalai#zoya nazyalensky#nikolai lantsov#zoya and nikolai baby fic#zoya and nikolai#row spoilers#rule of wolves spoilers#king of scars#rule of wolves#probably should be a fanfic but yolo bitches#leigh bardugo#the grishaverse#the grisha trilogy#the nikolai duology#nikolai duology#leoni hilli#adrik zhabin#tamar kir bataar#tolya and tamar#tolya yul bataar
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