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yuveenti-blog · 2 months

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Astrology Observations 08/06/2024

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🌞The Light & Dark Side To You Based On Your Sun & Moon Sign ( The Sun is what we are consciously aware of can see clearly, it represents the most positive traits in us as well. The moon rules our subconscious and what we can’t see clearly, it represents our dark traits).🌕

Aries Sun: Aries looks straight into fear and still decides to go in. These individuals feel accomplished when they conquer what they fear. They are driven to feel life in all its intensity, they do not and will not settle for a mediocre life. They want nothing more than to be surrounded by confident, successful, and fully-lived people. They want to inspire others by their actions but they are the one to continually motivate those around them, their positivity creating momentum for others in their life. They truly do believe everyone is capable. They have been through a lot of rough experiences and have built so much internal strength that they can shrug off many things. They have a distinct laugh and are certainly funny themselves. They utilize their experiences as lessons so they have a lot of wisdom to share. These are people who feel uncomfortable lying and prefer honesty as it helps them feel authentic. They grew up feeling different in many ways so they had to build a lot of confidence around their difference and learned that standing out and being different is bad, so they can actually be a lot more comfortable with theirselves than others who may feel the need to conform. An Aries is proud of their uniqueness and thrive off of utilizing it when no one is on the same boat as them.

Taurus Sun: Taurus people make you feel like you can cuddle in your bed and be alright. They do not bring an overwhelming and intense energy to rooms. They are the chill people who can remain chill even when chaos begins. They exude “ Queen and King” energy. They are truly meant to be an example of how you can manifest what you want. Inspirational and responsible. They are incredibly methodical when dealing with their goals. They don’t have time for questions without answers. When they go after what they want they know what they are doing and the end results. They are the kind of people who enjoy slow living, but they aren’t cheap. They require quality in their lives so they will continue on until they get it. It can be difficult to find Taurus who aren’t ultimate manifestors. Most Taurus get what they want or close to it in this lifetime. They are very classy and well-mannered people who take care of others very well.

Gemini Sun: Gemini’s have a charm about them that draws you to them without speaking. They seem interesting from a distance. They at times exude energy similar to Leo. They walk with confidence as if others are watching and they stand in a way to invite others in. When they do speak they garner a lot of attention. A lot of people gather to laugh, listen, and debate. Gemini’s are the master networkers. They can upgrade their lifestyle with their ability to be amongst different crowds and capture their attention. Geminis are also great at persuading others, so they do great in jobs where sales is important. Gemini’s are the kind of people who can move to a different state and seem like they’re from there. They don’t struggle to pick-up and move on, they always can upgrade and they know this internally. That is why they seem scatterbrained because they are searching for what is going to improve their life the most. And with this skill they can always offer you an idea to improve yours. They are fast learners and bring great energy to wherever they go.

Cancer Sun: A Cancer’s intelligence lies in how they perceive. They have environmental intuition and absorb information from wherever they are. Their wisdom lies in what they feel and what they know through their intuition. They can be insightful. They have a lot of drive towards their goals and often have such a lovely aura that they get the support needed to succeed. Cancers are nurturers because their instinct is to support, love, and care. They take action when someone needs or wants their support. These people are kind and enduring, they can go through a lot and still give.

Leo Sun: Leo’s like the Sun need to shine. Whatever they start with in life they want to maximize. Leo’s don’t operate small-minded, like Aquarius their goals are on a wide-scale which is why a lot of celebrities are Leo. They want to reach the masses. They strive to reach the top and will not allow themselves to be devalued. Leo’s have the self-respect other signs desire. This is innate to them. They preserve their selves and are careful who they let in to their life. These are very affectionate individuals and they radiate warmth. They have a confidence that isn’t based on circumstances, it’s a deep well of knowing whoever they are, they are great or will be great one day. Very loyal people that take friendship serious as well. They have a personality that people are drawn to. They can brighten other people’s days.

Virgo Sun: A Virgo is one of the greatest assets in any environment. They are solution oriented, nurturing, orderly, and modest. They know how to help because they can see issues easier than others and they have a pragmatic mind to create solutions. You can count them on a Virgo to extend their grace to others in times of need. They are realistic and it helps to guide them in their life because they don’t have grand ideals. Their ideals are very real and tangible so they know what steps to take to get what they want. A Virgo lives a life that allows them to not be distracted or influenced in negative directions. They can catch themselves faster than others and their minds will have them improving without putting in the effort others have to. They are intelligent people whose intelligence is deep and analytical. They convey their knowledge in digestible form so they often are relied on.

Libra Sun: Libra’s want the best for everyone. They think everyone deserves to live a beautiful life and they feel sensitive towards the downtrodden or the unfortunate. They get happy for others happiness and they want to show support to others all the time. They can be very charming and alluring because they always want to make others feel seen and heard. They can take your side just so that you feel understood. They like to go out, enjoy themselves and are into the aesthetics and vibes of places so they know where to bring their friends. These are peaceful people with hippie souls. They have an eye for beauty in everything from clothes, shoes, furniture, homes, and cars.

Scorpio Sun: Scorpio’s always fascinate other people. This is due to their complex nature. They have very chill demeanor’s, they can exude confidence without doing anything. A lot of times a Scorpio is a great person inside and out. They are chill because they do not want to overwhelm anyone with their internal worlds. At heart they are very sensitive, passionate, loyal, and loving. They do not give up on much of anything because they do not change their minds once they set out on something. They have a lot of drive and take action when needed. They see into other people’s soul, yet they do not want to hurt others. They respect others need for privacy just as they want theirs respected. They do not jump to conclusions. They aim to be clear and accurate which means that when a conclusion is made it has proper assessment.

Sagittarius Sun: A Sagittarius is concerned with joy. They aim to enjoy their lives and the path that allows them that they will follow. They are honest because they seek truth above all else. They connect to others from a very human disposition which makes others drawn to them for their authenticity. They have a sense of freedom most do not have. They understand freely speaking, freely thinking, and freely doing. While others feel restrained, a Sagittarius feels courageous and ready to explore. A Sagittarius is in a constant state of expansion and will always aim to improve theirselves and lives. People are drawn to them because their energy pulls others in and their smile makes others feel comfortable in their presence.

Capricorn Sun: Capricorns are the true definition of move in silence. These are the quiet millionaires. These are the people who have what others want, but no one understands how. It is not for others to know because they know to get what they want they have to put in hard work. They take life seriously in the sense that they don’t give themselves the space to feel comfortable without having the things they truly desire. That means these are responsible people who do not prioritize play over what needs to be done. These are excellent workers as they know that a job must and has to be done in a certain way to keep things running smoothly. They are realistic which grants them the ability to see things clearer than others as there is no fog to sift through. When they walk around they exude a confidence that makes you feel that they are powerful. When they open their mouths to talk, people can’t help but to pay attention. They don’t move on whim, they are intentional when they decide to move and have assessed all the avenues before deciding on the one ahead of them. They embrace the taboo, odd and unconventional ways of life and that gives them access to an entire different caliber than most which can make them even more understanding of how humans functions in this world. Incredibly smart and very calm people.

Pisces Sun: Pisces are not fully human because apart of who they are was and is left in the spiritual realm. Which is why oftentimes they do better living amongst people who understand and prioritize spirituality and the creative side of life. They are true unconditional lovers who bare their flesh to connect with others intimately and transcend to different realms. They are wise souls who have experienced much and continue to have access to insights intuitively. They are very open and receptive and can see the world in ways other people can’t. They have a healing energy that when coming into other lives often brings happiness and luck. They are highly compassionate and bring sensitivity to the brashness of the world.

Dark Side Based on Moon Sign:

Aries Moon: These people are very dark when they become dark. Their passion turns into pure anger, bitterness, and hatred. Their courage turns into destructive recklessness. Their honesty turns into manipulation and their positivity turns into complete negativity. They have a switch and when it is flipped it can bring out the worst in everyone around them. Their playful nature turns into violence and they can easily snap and physically harm someone just as quickly as they can do with their mouth. Their desire to be strong and powerful turns into a very jealous disposition and when they can’t take it anymore they seek to dominate those they feel are more powerful than them. Just as fast as they can motivate you, they can cut you so deep with their words that you’ll lose so much of your confidence in that one moment.

Taurus Moon: These people can abhor hard-work and fall into complete laziness. They can get so comfortable they don’t want to move and can convince themselves that they are fine when they aren’t. They will pin all the work they do not want to do on others around them and become increasingly demanding by the day. They will treat people like they are their assistant. They will put so much effort into their desires and give others desires the bare minimum. They do not take advice but they enjoy letting people think they care. Sometimes this is just their way of striking up a conversation with others ( pretending to care). They can play cordial and genuinely do not like you. They will talk behind your back and smile and shake hands in your face. When they begin to think they are succeeding they will easily fall into jealousy which can make them bitter. They are incredibly superficial especially about looks. They may act like they care about your heart, but they get absorbed in the physical attractiveness of others. They try to buy/spend their way out of depression and when it doesn’t work, falls harder into depression.

Gemini Moon: Lost souls who often times project a lot. They put high expectations on others that they cannot live up to themselves. They seek to cover up their confusion with knowledge. They have a restlessness that can make them anxious individuals and they need constant stimulation like a child. They struggle to deal with their own minds especially without other people around them. This is also the reason they become moody and irritated easily which can lead to harsh and hurtful words. They can hurt others and not understand the repercussions to their actions. When you need these people emotionally they are cold and puzzled. They can talk too much just for the sake of hearing their own selves.

Cancer Moon: These people are perpetual victims who will justify their worst behavior by talking about someone else. They may have so many emotions bursting out of them at once and then when someone else is emotional they become cold and dry. They save all their compassion for theirselves and don’t leave any for other people. The constant mood changes can make you feel like you’re walking on eggshells. They can demand a lot from others and turn resentful when they don’t get what they want. They can fall into laziness easily just seeking and wanting comfort to the point they begin to hurt theirselves. They eat away their pain, go through many emotional breakdowns, and pity themselves hoping someone pulls them out of their own demise.

Leo Moon: These people are like children who need attention and validation all the time. Their closeness to you is contingent upon how great you are at making them feel special, loved, and adorned. You must make them feel good or they will not want you around. They don’t crave the truth because lies are comforting to their ego’s. They can be pointless to give advice to as they are fixed and set in their ways and won’t budge for others. They feel like they are better than other people when they have more, do more, or are successful. They will lie and manipulate like no other leaving you confused and gaslit. They will care more about how they appear than who they are on the inside so often times they are completely chaotic internally. Extremely dramatic people who want to be the boss, on top, or above you and if they cannot be that they will run away. They can use people and discard them when they feel good again.

Virgo Moon: These people don’t realize how annoying they become which is what makes them worst, they stick around even once people are annoyed with them. They complain to complain. Which leaves you feeling increasingly negative after your interactions with them. They have a distorted perception of what is real and isn’t, oftentimes they equate everything negative and boring to real. They don’t know how to mind their business. They are too concerned with what others think and that makes them worry others with their worries. They act like robots when other people are emotional. They lose their minds over small details. They have weird habits and they don’t know how they feel so they make-up and lie about their feelings.

Libra Moon: These people drag others down because they don’t know what they want. They fluctuate frequently and expect others to deal with this inconsistency. They cannot cope with their emotions without looking to a drug, alcohol, and s*x. They want to be seen as angels, while playing like the devil. They’re chronic gossipers who don’t have the balls to be real to people. They fall for anyone who gives them validation and are easily manipulated. When not feeling well they become whiny babies. Their main interest is self-interest they just need others for the validation.

Scorpio Moon: These people are insane but pretend they’re chill. Their nature is obsessive so they do not truly know what chill is. When they’re quiet they are collecting information and making assessments of others. These are the kind of people who scheme on others. They do not admit to being wrong. They will put them selves around people just so they can put the blame on others. It is always them being done wrong even if they’re the one scheming behind others backs. They become bitter easily. They are very moody and their light and beauty disappears when they become depressed. They wallow in their sadness. They are controlling, power hungry, jealous, and manipulative. They have great liars and want to know everyone else’s secrets while hiding theirs.

Sagittarius Moon: These people are very forceful bullies who need weaker people around them to feel strong and capable. They don’t have any filter so they go about their lives in chaos. They are impatient with others but want others to wait so long for them. They get annoyed with others quickly. Constantly moving makes them feel productive even if they need to go to sleep and take care of theirselves. They’re self-absorbed into their own lives and can forget about people quickly. They have very bad mouths but are sensitive to what other people say. They have grandiose ideas with no follow through. They are very contradicting people who pick fights.

Capricorn Moon: These people are impossible to please. They act more humble than they actually are. They judge every little thing that doesn’t live up to their standards. They don’t even want to deal with their emotions so when they feel upset with others they don’t talk about it and form grudges. You are either good or bad to them and it’s very easy for you to become bad. They do not mind hurting other people’s feelings since they don’t deal with their emotions enough to care. They think they are better than others and are selective in who they get close to. They need to either use you, benefit from you, or look better having you in their lives. They look down on people with less than them. They want to have a lot of authority so they do not care for others opinions or others telling them what to do. They can take theirselves too serious and be slow to do things for others.

Aquarius Moon: These people think they are superior to others even when they simply are strange. They are fixated on their grandiose ideas and become delusional. When you try to open their mind they become stubborn and condescending. They want others to blindly agree with them. They act like emotions do not exist for them because they don’t know how to feel their emotions without intellectualizing them. They can be assholes towards other people. They are unpredictable and will do and say things that will bring shock and surprise or complete chaos. They don’t know what’s truly good for them, they just pretend to. These people without space can be exhausting and annoying.

Pisces Moon: These people think they are smarter than they truly are. They believe in good things happening for them so they follow things blindly until it turns bad for them. When they’re around shitty and terrible people they become them. These individuals easily end up on drugs, in jail, homeless, and in the streets. They do not know how to take accountability or responsibility. Once they become emotional they can throw tantrums, wallow in pity, and brood for weeks, months, and years. They’re not dependable since their heads are in the clouds. They can be incredibly lazy, just floating by in life. They’re followers and at times they can completely neglect reality.

Who You Attract/What You Are Attracted To Based On Rising Sign ( Ascendant)

Aries Rising: Gemini, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Pisces

Taurus Rising: Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Aries

Cancer Rising: Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn, Aquarius, Gemini

Leo Rising: Libra, Sagittarius, Aquarius, Pisces, Cancer

Virgo Rising: Scorpio, Capricorn, Pisces, Aries, Leo

Libra Rising: Sagittarius, Aquarius, Aries, Taurus, Virgo

Scorpio Rising: Capricorn, Taurus, Gemini, Libra

Sagittarius Rising: Aquarius, Aries, Gemini, Cancer, Scorpio

Capricorn Rising: Pisces, Taurus, Cancer, Leo, Sagittarius

Aquarius Rising: Aries, Gemini, Leo, Virgo, Capricorn

Pisces Rising: Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Libra, Aquarius

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#astro notes #astro observations #astro placements #astroblr #astrology

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majikkulu · 17 days

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♱ 𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖔 𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖘; 002 by majikkulu ;P ♱

━━ ❝ masterlist ❞

these are my personal observations and may not resonate with everyone. please take them with a grain of salt, as i'm not a professional astrologer! :))

♱ libra placements often go to two extremes: they can either be super relaxed and a bit lazy, or they become total neat freaks. there's rarely an in-between.

♱ aquarius placements always have something fun, interesting, or totally unexpected to say. they’re known for coming up with the most random and bizarre ideas. their minds naturally think outside the box, and they love surprising people with their unique takes on things. whether it’s weird or thought-provoking.

♱ aquarius moons in the 12th house often struggle with expressing their true feelings. they tend to hide their emotions, making it hard for others to know what they’re going through. this placement creates a strong inner world, where they keep their emotions buried and prefer to process them privately, leading to emotional isolation. it's difficult for them to open up and share with others.

♱ moon conjunct neptune can lead to a lot of confusion around emotions. these individuals may overthink their feelings, taking time to fully process them. they’re highly sensitive and can get upset easily, as they deeply absorb the energy around them. their emotions can feel overwhelming, making them very intuitive but also prone to emotional overload.

♱ people with chiron in the 11th house often feel like they never quite fit into society. they tend to be different from others, which makes it hard for them to feel a sense of belonging. this can also lead them to attract people who are different from themselves. they may struggle with trusting others and forming new friendships, often experiencing toxic relationships. at some point in their life, they’ve likely felt rejected or betrayed by friends, leaving deep emotional wounds tied to their sense of community and belonging.

♱ capricorn venus may have been hurt in the past, which makes them reserved and cautious when it comes to love. they don’t open up easily and tend to guard their heart. but once they commit, they love deeply and are incredibly loyal. they’ll go above and beyond for the person they care about.

♱ leo moons or moons in the 5th house can be quite dramatic with their feelings. they tend to be very expressive and may sometimes come across as over-the-top. their emotions can run high, and they might get upset easily, needing an outlet for their intense feelings.

♱ jupiter in the 7th house often leads to a large number of relationships. natives with this placement might have an extensive dating history, as they’re drawn to experiencing different connections and learning from a variety of partnerships. their expansive nature makes them open to exploring multiple relationships with different backgrounds/cultures throughout their life.

♱ mars in the 10th house often leads to careers that involve physical work or action, like the military or law enforcement. these individuals may be drawn to roles where they can assert themselves and take on challenges.

♱ venus conjunct mars natives are often very attractive, especially men. they tend to draw attention from both genders, which can sometimes lead to jealousy or envy from others. Their magnetic charm and strong presence make them stand out in social situations.

♱ venus in gemini or libra can be quite clingy and seek constant attention. they often crave interaction and validation, wanting to stay connected and engaged with their partner at all times.

♱ gemini mars can have a surprisingly high libido and are often very sexual. they might have unique kinks and specific things that turn them on.

♱ taurus venus can get very possessive and jealous, not just over their partners but also over loved ones. this intense desire for security and loyalty can extend to all close relationships, making them protective and sometimes overly controlling.

♱ uranus conjunct ascendant natives often have a unique and striking beauty. their aesthetic can be quite different from others, with an eccentric vibe that makes them stand out. they’re known for their rebellious and independent nature, frequently surprising people with their unexpected behaviour, whether it's positively or negatively.

♱ people with planets in your 12th house might secretly harbour hidden resentments or negative feelings, though this isn’t true for everyone. they might be the ones who hold grudges without you realizing it they can sometimes be your biggest enemies without you realizing it. be cautious about what you share with them, as they might use your words against you or act out their hostility indirectly, sometimes even playing the victim.

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winged-self-indulgence · 10 months

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Why Do People Like Yanderes?

Hi everyone, my name is Diya, and this was going to be a YT video-essay-type-thing but I'm too poor to afford a mic and too busy with college to learn how to edit videos, so here's my vague exploration of the psychology behind why people like yanderes so much through the lens of my favourite Visual Novels.

TW for uh. yandere content. Mentions of sex, gore, and non-con, particularly in the last topic. This is more like the first draft of an academic paper so while it's not explicit, I do go into some detail.

Introduction

If you’re a fan of anime or visual novels, then you’re probably already aware of what a yandere is, or at the very least you’ve seen that one picture of Yuno Gasai. Still, for the sake of thoroughness, let’s take it from the tippy top. The term ‘yandere’ is a Japanese portmanteau of ‘yanderu’ – the progressive form of ‘yami’ – meaning ‘sick’, and ‘deredere’ which roughly translates to ‘loving’. Together, the word refers to someone who is – in short – extremely lovesick. Obsessive to the extreme, and with little morality to spare, the standard yandere is characterized by a dangerous fixation on a chosen target, often appearing shy and caring at first only to flip the script and become violently aggressive towards perceived threats (Kroon, 2010).

It should be noted that yanderes are not a strictly romantic or sexual trope. The Ancient Greeks classified at least six forms of love, from familial (storge) to guests (xenia). Modern psychologists may distinguish love as either Companionate or Passionate (Kim & Hatfield, 2004) or consisting of three dimensions of Intimacy, Passion, and Commitment (Sternberg & Sternberg, 2018). Realistically, possessiveness shows up in a variety of relationships. However, people are generally primed to view certain dynamics as inherently amorous. Societal norms tend to encourage the idea that romantic bonds ought to rank above all others, and therefore if Person A is bizarrely fixated on Person B, then clearly there must be an element of sexual interest involved regardless of the actual relationship between the individuals in question.

Regardless, yanderes remain quite popular in fiction. Many dismiss it as a fetish, which it can be, but that isn’t the case for everyone. While there is nothing wrong with indulging in kinky fiction, not all of us get horny at the thought of being chained up in someone’s basement, no matter how hot our captor may be. So why is it so pervasive? Why is this trope so appealing that most writers cannot help but include at least a single line of dialogue implying that – if circumstances had been ever so slightly different – my wholesome shoujo romcom might have turned into a psychological horror?

Hybristophilia

‘Hybristophilia’, also known as Bonnie and Clyde Syndrome after the titular criminal couple, is a word is derived from the Greek word ‘hybridzein’ meaning ‘to commit an outrage against someone’ and ‘philo’ which means ‘a strong preference for’. Sexologist John Money reportedly defined it as a paraphilia in which an individual is sexually aroused by a partner who has a predatory history of hurting other people (Money, 1986, as cited in Matuszak, 2017). In his book, Serial Killer Groupies, true crime and crime fiction author RJ Parker distinguished two forms of hybristophilia: passive and aggressive. The former is when an individual contacts a criminal with the intention of striking up a relationship with them, allowing themselves to be seduced and manipulated but having no interest in committing a crime themselves. The latter are far more dangerous, as the individual not only derives sexual pleasure from their partner’s atrocities but are active participants in carrying out or covering up the crime. To quote Griffiths (2013, as cited in Pettigrew, 2019):

“[They] help out their lovers with their criminal agenda by luring victims, hiding bodies, covering crimes, or even committing crimes. They are attracted to their lovers because of their violent actions and want to receive love yet are unable to understand that their lovers are psychopaths who are manipulating them.”

In some ways, hybristophilia is the nearest thing we have to a realistic understanding of why people love yanderes. I mean, much of the fantasy surrounding such characters and their media tend to be filled with posts begging to be spat on or calling the rightfully terrified main character ungrateful for being a teeny bit upset about finding surveillance cameras in their ceiling. However, enjoying fictitious immoral activity does not predict real perpetration, so what does? There exists little consensus amongst psychologists as to what sparks this particular predilection, and that was strange to me. You would think there would be more studies into this topic, in spite of or perhaps because of its controversial nature. Heck, that one dude wouldn’t shut up about white women’s obsession with Bundy and Dahmer, and I assumed he had gotten that information from somewhere, but it turns out that was just him using modifiers to justify sexism.

However, I believe that we can hedge a few guesses, and over the course of my research, I’ve organized the main rationalizations under four umbrellas which I will explore through the lens of my favourite yandere-themed Visual Novels. Please keep in mind that most of these games are rated as mature due to sexual scenes and/or gore. Additionally, in the spirit of transparency, this ramble will be focused exclusively on male or masculine yanderes. So, without further ado:

Call Me Bob the Builder Because I Can Fix Them

If you’re familiar with DC Comic’s Batman, or just happen to have attended any costume event held over the span of the last 20+ years, you may be familiar with the character of Dr. Harleen Quinzel, better known as Harley Quinn. Initially created as the Joker’s one-off sidekick in Batman The Animated Series, she was so well-received by audiences that she became a recurring character in the cartoon and was eventually given a proper origin story in the form of a one-shot titled Mad Love.

Harley’s origin story has seen some alterations over the past decades, but the core aspects remain largely untouched. In the beginning, Harleen Quinzel was a promising young woman who wanted was a degree from the university’s prestigious psychology department, which she gained through…less than scrupulous means.

(Listen, I’m not sure if the authors were leaning on the Dumb Blonde stereotype, or if they simply thought that casting her as a genuinely bad student would make her later actions more believable. Either way, the idea of Harley as someone with a legitimate PhD came later)

After landing an internship at Arkham Asylum – a half-hospital and half-prison straight out of the 1870s that might as well be built out of one-ply tissue-paper soaked with gasoline and left next to a crate of fireworks – Harleen set her sights on the then incarcerated Joker. At the start, her fixation on the criminal wasn’t remotely sympathetic. She didn’t want to help him, she wanted to use him. Harleen Quinzel wanted piggyback off his infamy and write a tell-all tale detailing what sort of messed up childhood resulted in Gotham’s Clown Prince of Crime. Yet the more she interacted with him, the more the Joker took advantage of her empathy. By the end of their sessions, Harley no longer saw him as a violent serial killer with a clown schtick, but as a “lost, injured child looking to make the world laugh at his antics.”

But Diya, you may be asking, what does this have to do with the video? The Joker never loved Harley, and it could even be argued – as Shehadeh did in a 2017 essay – that her obsession with the pasty-faced clown is more akin to Histrionic Personality Disorder. While that may be the case, I believe that Harley’s story provides one of the reasons yanderes are so popular: their backstory.

Whether they were abandoned by their family, bullied by their peers, experimented on by evil scientists, starved on the streets, died under mysterious circumstances and then trapped in a haunted VCR tape for decades, or are simply so impossibly inhuman that they frankly do not understand why it isn’t socially acceptable to imprison their crush in a pocket dimension made of meat and non-Euclidean geometry, yanderes often have fairly sympathetic or at least understandable explanations for why they are Like That. Your mileage may vary significantly depending on how much you sympathize with these motives, but the point is that yanderes always make sense to some degree. Their morality and priorities may be twisted or even completely incomprehensible, but the audience almost always knows the reason, and that can be comforting. In the real world, other people aren’t always straightforward, and we never really know what they’re thinking, but narrative coherence demands a semblance of internal consistency lest the audience end up frustrated and confused. So yanderes are not only easy to sympathize with, but also fairly predictable. In-universe they may be unhinged freaks with a blood fetish, but to you watching from behind the safety of the screen they’re just acting out the script written for them based on a prototype. And if you understand the why behind their loose gears, then you might just be able to put them back together again.

The concept of rescue romances or “I Can Fix Them” has been around in our stories for thousands of years. The Epic of Gilgamesh detailed how Shamhat essentially ‘civilized’ wild man Enkidu through ritual lovemaking, and a concerning number of religions push the idea that women are dutybound to save men from the follies of sin. Yet men are not exempt either, with one notable example being the German fairytale, King Thrushbeard. Call it what you will regardless: Knights in Shining Armour, the Florence Nightingale Effect, or a plain old case of Because You Were Nice to Me, studies have shown that human beings generally like helping [DA2] others, even when the reason doesn’t necessarily stem from pure altruism. I will delve deeper into this later, but care and compassion are deeply ingrained in human nature, and arising from those roots is the appeal of this mentality: You can save them. You can change them. You can make them better. You are special, and the way you treat this person carries a weight that has not and will never be matched by anyone else for the rest of their mortal or immortal existence.

The illusion is a delicious one, especially if the person you’ve helped turns out to be a billionaire CEO with cash to burn, a super powerful ghost king willing to raze continents to dust for you, a demon having fun on a Friday night, or just your average hot creep with a knife. Moreover, different people have different ideas of what ‘fixing’ even means. Maybe you want to single-handedly rehabilitate your yandere into a functional member of society. Maybe you’re cool with the incessant stalking but would like them to stop slaughtering your friends, family, and local service workers. Maybe you want to make them much, much worse.

Not only do yanderes provide immediate proof that your actions have a tangible impact on the lives of others, but the fantasy also includes the desire of being seen as special. Of being admired and adored by someone whose life you inexplicably made better by virtue of simply being yourself, or an idealized version of yourself. In this fictional world, in this imaginary setting, the person you are is so uniquely, impossibly irreplaceable to someone. And if that’s the case then they can’t risk losing you, can they?

The Allure of Obsession, or ‘Til Death Do Us Part (Literally)

It shouldn’t be necessary, but here is my obligatory disclaimer anyway. Ahem: obsession is not a good thing in real life. Fixating on another human to the detriment of your own wellbeing and that of those around you is dangerous, as is encouraging someone else to obsess over you. You might think you are being worshiped, but real life is not a visual novel. The outside world doesn’t come with an age rating, the author’s guiding pen, and a convenient fade to credits sequence once you’ve reached an ending. The consequences will still be there in the morning, so don’t do it. Just don’t.

PSA out of the way, it’s natural to want to be wanted. Maslow’s Hierarchy places it just above physical safety, but I’d argue that it could easily be compared to baser drives. According to many psychological and anthropological studies, much of humanity’s continued survival and environmental dominance is largely attributed to our ability to form groups, cooperate with one another, and maintain complex interpersonal networks. Social support, intimacy, and a sense of belonging are linked to emotional and physical benefits, such as more optimistic health perceptions, higher subjective well-being, increased creativity and innovation, and greater self-efficacy (DeWall & Bushman, 2011; Harandi et al., 2017; Wang & Sha, 2018). Therefore, it’s perfectly understandable that rejection of any sort would be construed as a threat.

But if someone is obsessed with you, then you have no reason to worry about that, right? No more nights spent agonizing over how they feel about you, asking yourself whether your last text made you sound too desperate, or if you’re boring them because you spent the past hour info-dumping about Stardew Valley farm layouts. With a yandere, there will never be any doubt that they care about you. Sure, they might go about it in weird, manipulative, and insidious ways that violate your physical and mental autonomy, but you can’t deny their loyalty. They do love you in their own bizarre way. You are the sun around which they orbit. When you’re in the room, no one else exists. Every single messy flaw is just another bullet point on the mile-long list of why they adore you.

In essence, yanderes are not only attentive, but their love can be virtually unconditional. A yandere might know everything about you, and still revere you. It’s unhealthy as hell and you might genuinely question their taste, but it can be tempting to pretend that all of you, right down to the ugliest parts of yourself – the traits and choices that you would never share with another living soul even at gunpoint – are worthy of understanding, if not open praise and affection.

Attractiveness, or Okay but Have You Considered That They’re Hot Though?

I mean what am I supposed to say here? They’re hot, what do you want from me?

No, but in all seriousness, fictional media paints an idealized version of the world, and most yanderes are hot because they have the freedom of existing purely behind that screen; artfully arranged and edited to forever appear compelling to anyone who happens to enjoy their particular style. And there are a lot of styles to choose from. Whether you want them pretty faced and disarmingly cute, or scarred up and big enough to pin you like a butterfly, yanderes come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes that are meant to pique your interest and draw you in like a naïve little fish being lured towards the mouth of an angler fish, unwilling to believe that anything bad might happen to us when the bait is this pretty.

This is often referred to as the Halo Effect, a form of cognitive bias referring to the tendency for people to assume that a single obvious positive trait must be associated with other positive traits. The go-to characteristic is typically physical attractiveness, but a nice voice, good humour, and cooking skills are also factors which serve to influence our perceptions.

So, conventional physical attractiveness is one thing, but that’s only skin deep. What about beyond that? After all, the yandere still has to talk to you before they enact their master plan of tying you up in their basement until Stockholm Syndrome kicks in.

When I showed my friend a picture of John Doe from the game John Doe, she told me that he looked like a creepy slob, and she’s far from the only person who’s ever thought so. Look at them. I feel like if I tried to comb that hair it would simply eat me, and some of the CGs really put the scopophobia in Scopophobia Studios. I love Doe, but he is not hot, and he doesn’t behave in a normally appealing way either. If the player chooses not to take a bath, Doe will immediately comment that you “smell good” before following you home, breaking into your house, and leaving a bloody organ on the floor for the player to trip over. Many yanderes can at least fake a veneer of normalcy, but from the get-go Doe doesn’t even bother to pretend he’s anything less than an otherworldly creature stuffed into a vaguely person-shaped meatsuit. In an effort to find out why so many people had latched on to Doe – including me – I shopped around social media and YouTube for answers, and what I found was a widely unanimous sentiment.

While some were drawn to his fun design and goofy personality, most simply thought that he wasn’t inherently malevolent, just very confused. In addition to being a supernatural being with a completely alien axis of morality, Doe’s meta-awareness and unbridled attempts at winning the player’s affection lends him quite a bit of support from the audience, especially if you yourself also happen to struggle with social cues and relate to his pure earnestness. In Ending 7 of the extended version, the player character has the option to tell Doe – who has altered himself to pass as more ‘normal’ – that they prefer who he truly is, at which point he grows visibly flustered and sports an adorable pair of literal heart-shaped pupils.

Whether they’re charismatic, seductive, cute, sweet, funny, nurturing, or generous, the best yanderes have engaging personalities. Even while they’re committing truly heinous crimes against God, man, and your guts, you still kinda want to hang out with them, and you want them to acknowledge you as being just as interesting. And this is all fine in fiction because you’re the one in charge, and if you ever get bored or uncomfortable or busy with something else, then you can simply close the tab or window with zero consequences, which brings us to the final and most important reason.

Power Dynamics and Consent in Fantasy (I Couldn’t Think of a Joke Here Guys, This Is Kinda Serious)

Once again, I feel that I must preface this section just for the sake of my own peace of mind: sexual coercion and assault are vile and disgusting crimes that should never be emulated or tolerated in the real world. We are speaking purely of fictional media, specifically adult-oriented media in this case, so please be mindful.

In 2009, Bivoni and Critelli conducted a study on 355 undergraduate women with the goal of assessing the reasons behind fantasies of non-consent. At the time, there were two leading explanations of this phenomenon. One stated that women with high libidos but repressed views of sex used these imaginary scenarios to alleviate the guilt they had grown to associate with sex. Because the simulation was a purely mental exercise and they themselves were cast as helpless victims in the scenario, they were able to remain blameless while still finding sexual gratification. The second stated that these fantasies were an expression of liberation by women who were adventurous and comfortable enough with their own sexuality to engage with taboo ideas that they weren’t at all interested in performing in real life. Which do you think was more common?

If you guessed the second option, you’d be right. The study found that of the 220 women who had experienced such fantasies, 45% found theirs erotic, 46% were mixed, and only 9% reported pure aversion. One justification for this outcome relies on psycho-biological theories, for example masochistic preferences or the unintended activation of the sympathetic nervous system and subsequent mis-attribution of arousal. Other reasons have to do with higher order thinking and are tied to the power dynamics within such fantasies. On the surface is the appeal of being so desirable to someone that they simply cannot control themselves, but then there is a deeper impulse, which the researchers referred to as Adversary Transformation. To quote the article: “[fantasies] involve a struggle between an assailant and a potential victim in which it is relevant to consider who is the winner and who is the loser. At one level, it is a struggle over sex, but the woman's non-consent may be feigned or token. At another level, the woman may be seeking a victory that is not about whether sex occurs, but about what happens emotionally between the protagonists.”

Basically, the imaginary perpetrator may have ‘won’, but the self-character need not have ‘lost’.

Media provides an extra layer to the illusion, one that you as the viewer have absolute control over. If you are choosing to engage with a piece of media that explicitly labels itself as including R18+ yandere content, then you clearly have some expectations, and that background awareness goes a long way in reducing long-term discomfort and allowing audiences to make informed decisions. If you don’t like the plot, you can simply turn it off it with the click of a button, and when the screen goes dark it’s not like the yandere is going to punish you for saying no. Strade isn’t going to break into your house with a drill, there are no homicidal clown ghosts hiding in your TV, and no suspicious pink-haired hackers watching your webcam. They aren’t real, and the consequences aren’t real either. You have all the power here.

Conclusion

In summary, Yanderes are appealing for a variety of reasons. Whether you want to save them, think they’re attractive, wish to indulge in a dream of being utterly coveted, or simply enjoy a bit of spice in your me-time, it’s obvious why the trope has persisted for so long and will likely continue to do so. If you enjoy yanderes but are worried that having a taste for the less wholesome side of things might imply something about who you are as a person, don’t be. The notion that fantasies and media preferences directly reflect subconscious desires is not only painfully out of date debunked nonsense but also indicative of restrictive ideologies wherein bad thoughts = sin. This isn’t 1984. You haven’t committed a thought-crime by having a weird kink. You aren't going to superhell for fantasizing. The human mind is hardly ever so mathematically rational, and the point of fiction is to allow us to safely engage with and explore various ideas, provided the everyone involved is mentally, chronologically, and emotionally mature enough to do so.

Thank you all for listening to me. If you learned something or were just a little bit entertained. If you're curious about knowing more, I've listed my sources below

REFERENCES

Bivona, J. M., & Critelli, J. W. (2009). The Nature of Women’s Rape Fantasies: An analysis of prevalence, frequency, and contents. Journal of Sex Research, 46(1), 33–45. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224490802624406

Critelli, J. W., & Bivona, J. M. (2008). Women’s Erotic Rape Fantasies: An Evaluation of Theory and research. Journal of Sex Research, 45(1), 57–70. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224490701808191

DeWall, C. N., & Bushman, B. J. (2011). Social acceptance and rejection. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 20(4), 256–260. https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721411417545

Flynn, F. J., Reagans, R., Amanatullah, E. T., & Ames, D. R. (2006). Helping one’s way to the top: Self-monitors achieve status by helping others and knowing who helps whom. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 91(6), 1123–1137. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.91.6.1123

Harandi, T. F., Taghinasab, M. M., & Nayeri, T. D. (2017). The correlation of social support with mental health: A meta-analysis. Electronic Physician, 9(9), 5212–5222. https://doi.org/10.19082/5212

Hazen, H. (1983). Endless rapture: rape, romance, and the female imagination. https://openlibrary.org/books/OL3161300M/Endless_rapture

Kroon, R. W. (2010). A/V A to z: An Encyclopedic Dictionary of Media, Entertainment and Other Audiovisual Terms. McFarland.

Matuszak, M. (2017). Hybristophilia White Paper. https://static1.squarespace.com/static/55dfd21ee4b0718764fb34cc/t/5cb7cabee5e5f00ab13be58b/1555548863275/Hybristophilia+White+Paper.pdf

Oarga, C., Stavrova, O., & Fetchenhauer, D. (2015). When and why is helping others good for well-being? The role of belief in reciprocity and conformity to society’s expectations. European Journal of Social Psychology, 45(2), 242–254. https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.2092

Parker, R. (2014). Serial killer groupies. RJ PARKER PUBLISHING, INC.

Wang, T., & Sha, H. (2018). The influence of social rejection on cognitive control. Psychology, 09(7), 1707–1719. https://doi.org/10.4236/psych.2018.97101

#reference list is completed!#yandere #sunny day jack #my dear hatchet man #mdhm #stnaf #ddlc #john doe #boyfriend to death #tpof #degrees of lewdity #your boyfriend #14dwy #br<3ken colors #camp willowpeak #br0ken colors #obey me #binary star hero #favor vn

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mysecretlittlelibrary · 3 months

Text

Maybe I Just Wanna Be Yours

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 4.6k

Warnings: oral (f receiving), handjob, sub Loki, edging & overstimulation, forced submission kinda, hair pulling, a lil choking, I hope that's everything lol

Genre: smut and I guess fluff

Summary: You make Loki realize something about himself that he was not expecting to learn.

***

You plop down on the couch with your bowl of chips, getting comfortable to watch TV.

"Are you out here by yourself?" Loki's voice surprises you. You hadn't heard him come down the hall.

"Yeah." You glance at him over your shoulder with a shrug.

"Why?" His eyes narrow.

"I'm watching TV. You are familiar with that particular activity aren't you?"

"Yes I am, but why out here alone?" Loki rolls his eyes before sticking his head into the fridge.

"I wanted to leave my room. You're welcome to join me." You shrug.

"Why would I do that?" He scoffs.

"Believe it or not, some people enjoy doing things with other people in different spaces, you awkward little hermit." You roll your eyes. You walk over to the kitchen for a drink, realizing you forgot one.

"I am not a hermit." Loki crosses his arms. You grab a soda and walk over to Loki, leaning in close enough that he leans back suspiciously.

"This is the first time you've been out your room in like a week." You tell him.

"That is not true!" He steps away from you indignantly.

"It is, and that's fine. If that's how you like to live, I'm not judging you for it. But for me anyway, a change of scenery is good for the mind." You shrug walking back over to the couch.

"That doesn't make an ounce of sense."

"To each their own." You hum.

"You are a strange woman."

"Because I'm watching TV?" You tilt your head curiously.

"You spend your time so differently from everyone else here." He says.

"Yeah believe it or not I am an individual."

"That's not what I meant."

"No?"

"I just meant that most of the tower is left unoccupied from day to day, except you, you seem to- be everywhere." He frowns.

"If you're content never leaving your room that's fine, like I said I prefer a change of scenery. Helps mark the passage of time when we're not off saving the world." You shrug.

"There is next to nothing worth doing on this miserable planet."

"You are ridiculously negative." You chuckle, pressing play on your movie of choice for tonight. Clearly, this conversation with Loki is over, you have no interest in going back and forth about his cynicism. You hear him take a sharp breath, if you had to guess it's like one of those breaths you take before speaking but he doesn't say anything and eventually you hear his shoes along the floor and you smirk as you check that he is indeed gone.

It's not necessarily that you enjoy getting under Loki's skin the way you so obviously do, but it is rather easy and no one else speaks to him, which is kind of sad. To be clear you don't pity him, in fact this back and forth he reluctantly engages in is you refusing to treat him any different than you would anyone else on the team. It just so happens that he's easy to rile up and you find it funny but really this is just you being inclusive.

"You know y/n I don't get how you do it." Tony drunkenly says. It's supposed to be game night but after an hour Tony's of course too drunk to play so now you're all just talking.

"How I do what, Stark?" You ask.

"Deal with reindeer games the way you do."

"Reindeer ga- do you mean Loki?" You blink at him. You're not even sure how the group ended up on the subject, he's not here. How long were you checked out of the conversation?

"Yes obviously." He scoffs.

"It would be obvious if you used his name. Why are we talking about him, anyway?"

"Tony decided the next topic of conversation would be the team and somehow we got to how Loki is pretty much a recluse." Natasha explains to you.

"Exceeeept he talks to you. How does that work?" Tony asks.

"I dunno man I just poke fun at him like I do the rest of you and wait til he gets red in the face." You shrug.

"You mess with him on purpose?" Thor frowns.

"No, no! Not- really? He just, okay I don't try to get under his skin exactly, it's just when he engages with me, it seems like he expects hostility. I just give him back what I get from him and I don't think he knows how to handle that. But he keeps talking to me so I guess something about it gets through to him."

"That's very weird." Tony says.

"You're really in no place to judge Tony, we all know your list of idiosyncrasies is practically never ending." You roll your eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Is idiosyncrasies too big a word for our resident mad scientist?" You ask.

"I know what the word idiotsinkities means." He scoffs.

"Right." You hum. The others burst into laughter at Tony's slurred attempt at defending himself. It seems to be enough to change the subject and the rest of the night proceeds without another weird interrogation- especially once Tony passes out.

You lean against the wall as you listen to this guy, Jack, talk. He's close enough for you to smell his cologne, mostly to be heard over the music and the crowd of partygoers. You laugh at some silly joke of his, because he's cute and you'll probably end up making out with him in a quiet corner of the tower later if he doesn't say something stupid before you make that decision. The sound of someone clearing their throat pulls your attention from your conversation. Loki is standing there with his arms crossed and faced squeezed.

"Oh? Look who's come out to play." You muse.

"Do you know this guy?" Jack frowns.

"Jack, this is Loki, he's on the team. Loki this is my new friend Jack. Don't be rude, say hello." You nod your head towards Jack. Loki narrows his eyes as if sizing Jack up.

"Hey man. Nice to meet you." Jack puts his hand out to Loki.

"I don't shake hands." Loki says.

"Right- did you need something? We were, kind of talking." Jack says.

"I don't care what you were doing." Loki rolls his eyes.

"Play nice Loki." You say, practically singing the warning.

"I'm not a dog." Loki glares at you.

"Well don't go around snarling like one." You snap.

"Is something- going on between you two?" Jack frowns.

"No." You say firmly.

"Alright well I'm going to get another drink, do you want anything?" He asks.

"Just you back here soon." You wink at him.

"I'll be as quick as I can." Jack kisses your cheek and walks off while Loki breathes incredibly noticeably agitated as he rolls his eyes ago.

"Alright Loki, what is your problem?" You scoff.

"He looks like a jungle cat."

"Really? I don't see jungle cat honestly, he kind of looks like a deer to me." You hum.

"Not in his appearance I mean the way he was closing in on you, like a lion waiting to attack a gazelle." He frowns.

"What? You don't think I can handle the big scary man Loki? Don't insult me, I've killed things that would eat him for an afternoon snack." You scoff.

"It's not that I think you can't handle him. Something about him was just- off. Didn't like his energy."

"Something was off? You didn't like his energy? Really that's what we're going with?" With a hand on his chest you press Loki against the wall.

"What else could I possibly be going with?" Loki tries to keep his voice steady, but with your hand now trailing down his abdomen you can feel muscles tensing under your touch.

"Truthfully I think somebody didn't quite enjoy seeing me pay so much attention to Jack. Don't worry Loki, he couldn't possibly replace you." You hum.

"Don't be ridiculous." He scoffs. You smirk as your hand dances lower and you watch him go stock still when your fingers trace along the waistband of his pants.

"You won't get anywhere by lying to me you know." You say. His mouth drops open slightly as you curl your fingers for your nails to gently caress his skin. "Do you want me to stop Loki?" You whisper in his ear teasingly. As if a bucket of ice water was dumped on him you watch Loki jump back out of your reach and clear his throat before walking off with a glare. You frown as you watch him go, perhaps you pushed too far this time. You think you need to apologize. You start to make your way through the crowd and somehow get caught by Jack.

"Hey, where are you off to?" He asks.

"Looking for you actually, I need a bathroom but I didn't want you to think I was leaving you hanging. If you go back to our little corner I will find you again shortly, alright?" You tap his chest and bat your eyelashes before spinning away from him to continue your task of tracking Loki down. You pop into the nearest empty room.

"Friday, where the hell did Loki go?" You ask her. The tower is huge and since you lost sight of him while talking to Jack it could take you forever to find him on your own.

"He's on the Balcony lounge at the end of the hall upstairs." Friday tells you.

"Thank you!" You tell her, heading for the stairs. Sure enough, there's Loki brooding on the balcony by himself. You slide open the door and Loki's head whips around. When his eyes settle on you, they narrow.

"I've had it with your games tonight." He says.

"No games. I actually wanted to apologize." You say.

"For what?" He regards you suspiciously.

"If I went too far just now. I'm never trying to make you uncomfortable with the teasing. If I crossed a line I want you to know I wasn't trying to and I respect your boundaries." You say gently.

"You think that made me uncomfortable?" He scoffs.

"Well you did quite literally run away."

"You do realize I'm a god, don't you?"

"So what?" You shrug.

"People worship me y/n."

"People worship me too Loki. Shall I start calling myself a goddess?" You cross your arms.

"Of course not." Loki looks at you incredulously.

"Well I'm just saying darling if you're quantifying your power here by being worshiped there are people who would tell you I am the path to heaven. Or, I suppose for you it would be Valhalla, right?" You tilt your head.

"That's rather presumptuous."

"Don't misunderstand here. I never asked them to deify me but who am I to deny those who believe I know the entrance heaven's gate?"

"And where is that?"

"Heaven's gate?" You chuckle, quirking an eyebrow up at him. "I don't think you can handle the answer to that question Loki, truthfully."

"You have no idea what I can handle." He frowns.

"I'm sure you're very capable honey but you've made it clear that you and I have... very different types." You say.

"What's that supposed to mean?" The frown deepens.

"Why did you run off? If you weren't uncomfortable, what made you run and hide?" You ask.

"How does this pertain to my question?" Loki shakes his head.

"My question is the answer to yours."

"I don't follow."

"Answer the question, and I'll offer an explanation." You say. Loki lets out a harsh breath through his nose.

"Your behavior, is disarming."

"And you don't like being disarmed?" You tilt your head.

"It's not something I'm used to."

"Right." You hum.

"So?"

"You said if I answered you'd explain the connection." Loki says.

"I like disarming people. It's something I do quite well, and often. You don't seem too fond of that. Which- obviously wouldn't work."

"It's something you do well with mortals. I'll remind you I'm a god."

"So you've said but I did it pretty well to you like five minutes ago." You shrug.

"You caught me off guard." He frowns.

"It's not like I couldn't do it again."

"That's a rather bold assumption. One that I'm inclined to disagree with." His brow furrows.

"That's cute." You chuckle.

"I'm not so easily frazzled as your pathetic midgardian males." Loki insists.

"What just happened does not support that claim, but your insistence is exactly what I'm talking about when I say you're not my type. Putting you in your place would be so much trouble." You shrug.

"Putting me in my place?! On the contrary darling I would have you begging me. You'd call me king."

"What do I care for a king when there people who call me their god?" You scoff tugging at Loki's shirt to bring his face closer to yours. "Do you get it yet Loki? You want control and I'm unwilling to give it. You think too small to ever command me."

"You don't know that." His eyes narrow.

"Your breathing stuttered when I grabbed your shirt. Plus there's not a creature in all the nine realms thinking big enough to command me darling. Don't worry it's not just you." You wink at him pulling back and turning away from him to leave.

"Your attitude is insufferable." Loki growls grabbing your wrist and pinning you against the building with a hand around your throat.

"Is it?" You smile trailing your fingers from his wrist up his arm. You watch his jaw tense as his eyes snap between your face and your hand a couple of times before his gaze settles on you. His grip on your neck tightens as your fingers reach his shoulder. There, you shoot your hand quickly into his hair, fisting a handful of it and yanking, hard. Loki's head snaps back and his knees almost buckle as a strangled moan escapes from him. Your other hand grabs his wrist attached to the hand on your neck, his grip has loosened to practically nothing from your sudden hair pull but this is about power and control and if he's determined to convince you he's got some here you're determined to ensure he knows that's not true. "Let go Loki." You say in that sultry commanding tone you usually reserve for submissives. Slowly, his fingers unfurl until they no longer hold you and you finally release his hair, only to knock his ankle in such a way that he drops to his knees. He snaps his head up towards you with a glare in his eyes but all you do is smirk at him. "Shame you're such a brat, you look so good on your knees for me." You hum tilting his chin slightly. You lean forward, close enough to feel his heavy breaths against your face. "Goodnight Loki." You whisper. You drag your finger from his chin up his cheek and then turn away, leaving him on his knees on the balcony with more questions than he can answer as you return to the party.

The loud knock on your bedroom door pulls your attention from the show you're watching. You almost don't want to get up but whoever is looking for you seems rather incesent so you roll out of bed and swing open the door to find Loki in the hall.

"Loki? What are you doing here?" You cross your arms and lean against your doorframe.

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Look whatever Tony said to upset you, you can always get him back by calling out that he's a spoiled brat with daddy issues and a lack of self control so embarrassingly pathetic it's a miracle Pepper wants to be within 10 feet of him let alone spend the rest of her life with him." You sigh.

"That was- scathing and rather immediate, do you just spend your free time thinking of nasty things to say?" Loki blinks at you.

"No but I do have an arsenal of harsh comments if ever I need to hurt someone's feelings." You shrug.

"I'll- keep that in mind but this isn't about Anthony Stark." He shakes his head.

"Well, what is it then?"

"Could I- do you mind if come in?" He asks. You poke your head into your room checking for anything you don't want him to see.

"Fine." You say after confirming your room is clean. You open the door fully and let him through the doorway. "What's this about Loki?"

"The party the other night. Do you, remember what we talked about?" Loki asks.

"Well yes but you'll need to be more specific on where this is going."

"I just, I've been thinking about it and I think you're wrong and I'd like to prove it to you."

"Oh this should be good. Wrong about what exactly? Because I think I made myself quite clear. You'll never get the control from me that you seem to think you want." You shrug.

"No that much is obvious. But you said I wasn't your type and I think that's- not true." Loki's brow furrows as he speaks.

"What a shocking turn of events." You hum.

"Do not mock me." He sighs.

"I'm not. You were so insistent you couldn't possibly fit the bill I'm surprised by the turn around."

"Believe me so am I but, I haven't been able to stop thinking about that night. Something about you forcing me to my knees I just- something happened."

"Something happened?" You quirk an eyebrow at him.

"You disarmed me again but- I liked it. I think. And I'd like to try and understand that."

"Say it Loki."

"You said your partners worship you, show me how to do the same." Loki says.

"And you're sure you want this? If you misbehave I can be very mean."

"I'm sure." He nods.

"Then we'll have to discuss some things first. I won't touch you until I've asked some questions." You shake your head.

"Ask me anything."

"How do you feel about restraints?"

"No handcuffs. Ropes are fine."

"How are you with pain?"

"I don't know my limits but I'm not- opposed." He says.

"I'm not going to paddle you or anything darling it's much too soon for any of that but we'll use a stoplight system anyway. I'll check in frequently but at any point you can say yellow if you realize you're reaching a limit or red if you need something to stop. You'll also need a safeword."

"I don't need a safewor-"

"I don't know your limits, you don't even know your limits. It's a nonnegotiable Loki, you need a safeword. Pick one." You say.

"If I must, I'll use another color. Gold."

"Gold?"

"It's easy to say, I wear it a lot, do you think it'll get confusing?"

"Nope. As long as it's something you can remember." You shrug.

"I can remember gold." He says.

"Then gold it is. And Loki?"

"Yes?"

"You must promise me you will use it if you need to." You say.

"I won't need to."

"Don't start with that nonsense." You roll your eyes. "I need to know you'll use it if it comes to that."

"Fine. If it comes to that, I'll use it." He nods.

"Good. Couple more components. Overstimulation and or edging. Where do you fall?"

"I think you underestimate my resilience." He frowns.

"These are things I ask all of my submissives Loki you are not exempt. Not everyone likes the same things. You're lucky I'm not making you fill out my entire questionaire right now. You'll have to do that later." You scoff.

"I have homework already?"

"If you want this to continue after today you will. For now, overstimulation and edging."

"That's fine with me."

"Toys?"

"Can we- hold off on those until we have a longer conversation about it?"

"Absolutely. How do you feel about names? Do you like being called mean things? Are there certain pet names you don't like?"

"When you say mean things-" Loki trails.

"Mean names like slut or whore, I might scold you for 'making a mess', or tease you for being responsive."

"If- you say something that strikes a nerve I'll say so. Otherwise proceed whatever way feels natural." He says.

"Do you have any questions?" You ask.

"No." He shakes his head.

"Well that's the end of the preliminaries."

"So we can start now?"

"You think you're ready?"

"Yes."

"Kneel."

Loki drops to his knees hesitently, looking at you with wide eyes.

"From here on you'll address me as mistress, is that understood?"

"Yes... mistress." Loki says. You can see the wheels turning in his head, trying to decide how he feels about it.

"I know I said this the other night but you really do look so perfect on your knees for me." You hum grabbing his chin. You wrap your fingers around his throat and bend over to kiss him. Loki reacts eagerly to your kiss, leaning up into you as much as you'll allow given your hand still holding his neck. When you pull away his mouth tries to follow yours but you hold him in place. Part of you just wants to look at Loki on his knees for a couple of hours, one day you'll tie him up real pretty and take pictures of him kneeling for you. "You want to learn how to worship me do you?"

"Please mistress." Loki breathes out. God that was hot. You're already thinking of ways to make him beg. You pull your shorts off and Loki's gaze falls to the apex of your thighs, still covered by your underwear, but his tongue darts out to lick his lips.

"Take my underwear off, with your teeth. Just your teeth." You tell him. Loki leans forward and latches onto a corner of your panties with his teeth. It takes him a moment to get the hang of it but you watch as Loki works them over your hips slowly. Once they're off, you thread your fingers through his hair, using the leverage to angle his gaze back up to yours. "Let's see if that silver tongue of yours is good for anything other than those silly retorts of yours hm?" You hum shoving Loki's face towards your pussy. He reacts quickly, tongue lapping at your center with fervor. You tug at his hair, arching towards his mouth, as he works you.

"That's it Loki, keep going." You moan. Loki looks up at you while he seemingly tries out a few patterns, trying to work out what you like best. You pull his hair when he does something you like, enjoying the way he groans when you do. "Wrap your lips around my clit and suck." You tell him. Loki is quick to follow your instructions and it doesn't take long for you to coat his mouth in evidence of your orgasm. You pull his head away from you, petting his head affectionately. "That was a good start. Up. Lay on the bed and take off your shirt." You instruct stepping back. Unsteadily, Loki stands up and walks over to your bed, stripping his shirt before he lays down. His body is stiff, probably since your instruction was vauge.

"Relax Loki. You look so- rigid." You chuckle sitting next to him on the bed. You allow yourself to simply admire his exposed chest, using your fingers to trace the plains and valleys of lean muscle that tense up at your touch. Eventually, you drag your hand down, dancing along the edge of his pants allowing the anticipation to build before you slip your hand beneath his jeans. Over his boxers, you stroke his dick, tracing veins and feeling it's size through his underwear.

"Uh... M-mistress?" He says breathily.

"What is it Loki?" You hum, with your free hand you work his jeans down his legs enough to see what you're doing to him. His grey boxers are already a bit darkened from pre-cum.

"If, if you keep doing that I'm- I'm afraid I'll make a mess of myself rather early." Loki frowns.

"So what?"

"W-well it's it's embarrassing mistress." He says, though little grunts interrupt his words.

"Embarrassing? So you don't want me to touch you?" You ask slowing your movements.

"N-no mistress that's not what, I do, want you to touch me. If that's what you want to do." He scrambles.

"See that's what I thought." You say speeding up again. Loki jerks against your hand low moans filling the room as you watch him react to your touch. You continue to stroke him over his boxers, watching the darkened spot of pre-cum grow ever so slightly bigger. You notice immediately when Loki's hands grip your sheets tightly. He must be getting close. It prompts you to increase your ministrations.

"M-mistress wa-wait stop I, I'm too close- I'll ruin my-" Loki doesn't finish his sentence. A shuddering moan accompanies the visual of his orgasm darkening most of the front of his boxers, wet streaks ruining much of the light grey fabric. There's something you quite enjoy about the sight even as Loki's cheeks tinge pink with shame. "I'm sorry." He mutters.

"Don't apologize. I wanted that to happen. As for the rest of your orgasms you'll have to earn them. You must ask for my permission to cum for the rest of the session. If you cum without my permission there will be consequences. Am I understood?" You grab his chin to make him look at you.

"Yes mistress." Loki says, eyes wide, searching your face, for what you're not sure.

"Good." You say pulling his dick out of his soiled boxers. You lick along the length once, reveling in the hiss Loki lets out no doubt from sensitivity. His previous orgasm makes for plenty of lubricant as you begin stroking him again, slowly. Loki's breaths come out in shudders and you lean over to place kisses and hickeys along his throat. Each bloom of red along his neck and chest pulls sweet moans from him until the sensitivity wears off. Soon, surprisingly soon, you see him grab the sheets again.

"Mistress I, I'm close-"

"So soon? Wow." You taunt.

"Can I cum mistress?"

"But before you didn't want to. Remember? You even asked me to stop." You slow down, almost stopping.

"No nonono that was- that was different I didn't mean it that way-" he seems to give up on his defense in favor of a groan at the sudden decrease in stimulation.

"Well, I was so kind in giving you the first one and you didn't even thank me. So you'll have to really convince me you want another." You shrug when his harsh breathing slows a bit you pick up the pace of your strokes again. When Loki grips the sheets you slow down again and when the tension dissipates you pick up. You do this three or four more times before Loki's moans start to transform in to pathetic sounding whines, his chest is red, his knuckles are white, and his dick is throbbing in your hand.

"Please- mistress." Loki pants.

"Please what baby boy?"

"I can't- I can't do it. I need to cum, I need to, please. Please mistress."

"You need to?"

"Please! Please mistress. Please let me cum. Oh god I need you to. Please." Loki's begging is boarderline hysteric, he's trembling and half of his words come out as moans.

"I do love to hear you beg."

"Please!" He whines out.

"Oo that was a good one. Very well, go ahead and let go for me sweetheart." You say sweetly, stroking faster to help him along. A few pumps later and he's spilling onto himself and your hand with a cry that makes your walls clench around nothing. You continue stroking him through it and even after he's coming down. You wonder if you can't pull one more from him. Loki jolts against your touch, scrambling as if to escape it but unable to go anywhere really.

"G-g-gold! Gold. I can't. Please." Loki pants out.

"Hands up." You say as you do exactly that. "Sorry Lo I- guess I got carried away. I'll get a towel for you." You get off the bed and grab a towel, wetting one side to clean him off and using the other to dry him after. You hand him an extra blanket after. "Give yourself some time to recoup okay?"

"You're cruel."

"I wasn't trying to be. You just- fell into your role so well. I told you I'm not easy. But I'll remember you're still new to this and be sure to treat you gently in the future. Mr. you underestimate my resillience."

"I can handle it."

"With time I'm sure. No rush now." You shrug.

"Wait- don't go anywhere please." Loki grabs your wrist.

"You need water honey."

"Later." Loki tugs hard enough to pull you into the bed next to him. You sigh and wrap your arms around him, playing with his hair gently. Loki will make for one interesting submissive if he decides this is something he wants long term. You'll have your work cut out for you, but maybe he's better suited for this than you think. Only time will tell I suppose.

***

#marvel #marvel fanfiction #loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki smut #loki laufeyson

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mpchev · 4 months

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Dissertation on Fanfiction Bookbinding — Looking for participants! [EDIT: Thank you so much, participants found!!!]

[Edit continued: I'm still sorting through emails and setting up meetings, will reply to everyone very soon, I can't even begin to thank everyone enough for the visibility that's been given to this 💜 I'll keep the updates coming as I work on the dissertation (and learn how to bookbind), in case anyone would like to follow along. For any questions about the research or comments/suggestions/resources about ficbinding, my asks are wide open. Thank you thank you thank you!!!]

Hi! My name is Marie Chevrier, I’m currently doing my postgraduate dissertation on fanfiction bookbinding, and I’m looking for people to talk to about it!

If you’ve ever taken a fanfic from somewhere online and turned it into a physical copy, either for yourself or as a gift, I’d love to know more. From printer paper stapled together to typesetting and painted edges, nothing is too simple or too complex — I’m interested in the whole process, what motivates readers or authors to bring the story to a different format, and how it’s one more way to interact with stories actively and creatively. This will be the final project of my MLitt in Folklore and Ethnology with the Elphinstone Institute (University of Aberdeen, Scotland).

What to Expect

To participate, you must be 18 or older and speak English. I’ll give you more details and answer any questions you might have via email, and will then set up individual video calls with participants (if you happen to be in North-East Scotland, we could also meet at an agreed public location). I’ll tell you more about the dissertation and explain how what you share will be used, which depends entirely on what you agree to, including if you would prefer your contribution to be credited or anonymised. I will ask you about your experience with fanfiction bookbinding and if you have some examples to show me, I would love to see them! Meetings will last approximately 45–90 minutes and take place in June 2024. You have the right to withdraw your participation at any time.

Contact Information

If you’d like to participate or have any questions, please send me an email at [email protected]

To know more about the Elphinstone Institute, please visit https://www.abdn.ac.uk/elphinstone/

To know more about me, here's an intro post for you.

If for any reason you don’t wish to participate but still have comments/suggestions/resources/musings you’d like to send my way, please do!

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kujoestars · 3 months

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The Mechanism of Kafka's Transformation and How It Affects Him

(Crossposting my analysis/theory from Reddit. Also, warning: this post contains both anime and manga spoilers so beware if you are anime-only)

So, something that drove me nuts about the manga's version of the X-ray scene was the fact that there was literally no difference from a normal human chest x-ray. The anime THANK GOODNESS fixed that:

We finally know exactly how Kafka's core looks while he's in human form. It appears to be primarily occupying where the chambers would be with a good amount of myocardium (the heart muscles) suspending it while also continuing to function as a heart.

Notably for me, there's actually a translucent hemicircle up top there where it's supposed to connect to the aorta. In fact, you can see the core is translucent on its left (our right) side while more opaque to its right (our left).

Let me highlight it for reference I hope y'all appreciate the fact I had to do it with a mouse on MSPaint because Reddit won't save images to drafts and I can't drop images from tablet like on desktop:

It appears that Kafka's heart was fully converted and the tissue there is just a facsimile since it appears to be forming a pouch for the core to nestle in.

The anime's expansion of the scene the Mysterious Larva/Young Yoju fused with Kafka ended up perfectly tying in to this. Something I noticed was that Kafka was not actually transforming for most of it. Initially he was clutching at his throat where it entered:

Then just before the transformation started (when his eyes started glowing), he was clawing desperately at his chest:

For reference to anyone who's never studied anatomy, the mid-esophagus is actually resting against the heart, which is why the best form of imaging for the heart is a transesophageal echocardiogram (i.e. stick an ultrasound down the esophagus), which works like in this diagram:

In other words, the Larva's target was his heart and it was burrowing into it from that point. Which is consistent with where Kafka was clawing at in the shot I posted before and why after the change completed, his hand was resting just above that area:

Basically, the theory I have been saving specifically for after this episode is: Everything about Kafka's body is tied to the core.

Yes, that was obvious since we saw him regenerate his entire body from just the core, but what I'm saying here is that that the heart was the only thing the Larva was trying to fuse with. The rest of the body followed instantaneously once the heart became a core. Kaiju cores appear to be storing a lot of energy, so it would fit in with why even the initial change could happen so rapidly. It was a large burst of energy that had Kafka's cells all convert and restructure, and we even see steam coming both off and out of him here in the anime.

All future changes seem to be purely a matter of him controlling every cell in his body like individual muscles or even like how cuttlefish and octopi are able to change their appearance in an instant from muscle contractions and chromatophores.

In other words, the evidence has stacked to full OVERKILL that Kafka is truly a kaiju that can shapeshift into a human rather than the reverse like he and everyone else prefers to think.

Which leads me to my big pet theory right now: the reason Kafka is losing his ability to revert to human form is because he's becoming malnourished. I won't stack the image evidence since I've already done enough and the focus is on the core and Kafka's real biological nature now (I'll save that for a future post, lol), but it only stands to reason that if Kafka is physiologically a kaiju regardless of form, that means he has the metabolic needs of a kaiju.

He was only fine before because he had a lot of extra body fat as reserves and didn't use his kaiju form much. But after entering the Defense Force, he's been in multiple situations where he had to push himself while transformed and consume much more energy. If you pay attention to his body type, you'll notice he's been having quite a bit of weight loss.

Sure, he's been training a lot too and eating better, but following the fight with Isao, he's becoming abnormally thin. Maybe not enough for people to immediately think he needs a sandwich, but as of the latest chapters, I've noticed he's actually pretty lanky now even in kaiju form when previously Kaiju No. 8 was built like a bear.

You could argue it's just art evolution EXCEPT literally no one else had such a drastic change in body type or AT ALL. I'm pretty convinced this is an intentional transition from Matsumoto.

Whatever Kafka is eating as a human, it's not enough to sustain him long term and so his body is going into power save mode. And since his default is kaiju (why else would he constantly slip up his first few months if it wasn't actually his default form?), his body is losing its ability to shapeshift because it doesn't have the energy to. Malnourishment tends to manifest in a similarly piecemeal fashion irl, so I'm not surprised its first sign is just one spot on his hand.

Such a deceptively simple reason for the kaijufication is precisely why I'm very certain that is the cause. Kafka has a lot of issues with loving and taking care of himself. And this series is all about subverting tropes in favor of common sense. It's not some "inner demon" trying to take over (the Larva actually only did that once because Kafka was both in danger and refusing to fight back what it perceived as another daikaiju); Kafka just isn't taking care of himself as usual!

And there you have it, folks. Finally, a clear breakdown of what exactly the Larva did, how the transformations work, and why the kaijufication may not be as scary as everyone thinks. Or rather....not in the way they think. Someone please feed that kaiju properly!

#kaiju no. 8 #kn8 #kn8 spoilers #kn8 analysis #kn8 meta #kafka hibino #mysterious larva #mysterious young yoju #kaiju

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johnbrand · 2 months

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Screen Froze

Podcasting had become inescapable in recent years. Everyone seemed to have an opinion on...well everything. Politics, world sports, cooking, an obscure movie from 1978 only released in a now-extinct language. If it could be covered, it would be. And one could find this content anywhere across the internet. Youtube, social media, even streaming services promoted their podcasters. Everyone was watching everyone talking.

Of course, with so many different podcasters flying about, it was difficult to actually spot out talent. And from a sociologically micro perspective, it was even harder for individuals to find podcasters discussing the content they actually wanted to hear about. The more unique the niche, the less people one could happen upon to be talking about it during their recorded stream of consciousness. It was a simple formula, but it forced individuals to browse for hours or even days to find what they were searching for.

Sometimes though, people could not hold such patience. They would not wait for their new hero, a disciple preaching their values and morals to audiences around the globe. They would skip past one livestream discussing the economics of green villages in Switzerland to the next debating the potential existence between a minor character in two separate fandom universes. They could even perhaps land into a podcast like Sean’s.

“Most people just don’t understand the Soviet Union’s impact on architecture,” the measly, pale nerd innocently commented. A little shy in front of the camera, he was only able to relax a bit when discussing his favorite topics. Sean dressed in theme too, wearing a brutalist-like business casual outfit, a trait his small but dedicated fanbase adored.

“There were a lot of architects that really shaped this movement from all around the world,” Sean continued. “But today, we are just going to focus on those from the USSR.”

So what happened when one’s patience dried up? Well, everything was brought to a halt.

DragonHeart49: anyone else’s screen freeze? superduperloverboy: mine too <3bitsandmore: sean, I think ur glitching out

With the screen frozen, our impatient soul could now get to work. If one could not find the podcast they were looking for, then why not just create their own? Obviously, this did not mean constructing a podcast themselves, but rather alter the fabric of reality and completely realign another’s being to their preferred state. That was much easier.

Physical modifications were made first. A much larger body was necessary, something that demanded confidence and respect from others. Juicy pecs, rippling abs, sturdy legs. There was always something unreasonably fun in bloating the podcaster’s feet up a few sizes. An imposing frame to be craved by others, even when hidden underneath clothes, was priority. And speaking of clothes, those were quickly stripped down to less formal articles. Expensive branded tee, athletic shorts so small that boxer-briefs were visible, classic white Nike socks, all of it much more respectable than a button-up and tie.

This was not the impatient soul’s first time altering a podcaster to their liking, nor would it be their last. Physically at least, each of the end products were a little different. All alpha males, but just enough variation to not warrant any unnecessary rumors. This particular podcaster had his pre-American heritage redirected from France to India, the features in the screenshot tanning accordingly as a dark stubble acquainted itself along the sharper jawline. Of course, the bulge was accurately enlarged for geographical standards too.

Mentally however, all the podcasters could be considered copies. They each spoke of the same rhetoric, theories, and ideologies that our impatient soul wanted to hear. No matter how “backwards” or “hateful” their discussions were deemed as, nearly anything could be said by hulking bodies with undeniable charisma.

“These homos have no idea what they’re talking about!” Sanjay raged as the podcast restarted, his deep voice cocky and assertive. "Sure bro, I was just thinkin’ about a girl’s rack I saw earlier today but there's more to a girl than big tits. There's a tight pussy too!”

The chat section lit off with encouragement, their fates too having been altered.

MassiveFART69: you tell them fags bro! LOL XD crassmassschlongnator: we want to BREED THEM TOO!!!! <3TITSGALORE: JUST TALKIN ABOUT IT ALREADY GOT SANJAY GRABBIN HIMSELF AGAIN

Sanjay vacantly looked down, finding himself already subconsciously scratching at the thick bush within his shorts. He let out a hot protein fart followed by a laugh, his scratching slowly extending into groping his fat 8 inch babymaker.

“God, that was WET bros!” Sanjay applauded himself, his free massive hand swallowing the mic. “Anyway, I’ll catch you on the flip side dudes, gotta go hit the gym. Bros for life!”

There was a reason the traditional masculine movement was becoming stronger. Maybe it was because men were slowly aspiring to become the alphas’ equals, or because fags were beginning to submit to their nature. Or possibly, it could have been because each time a screen froze, reality was altered one click closer to traditional, normal masculinity.

#gay to straight #male tf #male transformation #dumbification #jock tf #breeder tf #indianization #fratification

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femmefatalevibe · 1 year

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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Validate Yourself & Stop People Pleasing

A comprehensive guide to learn love & trust yourself and break out of your people-pleasing identity. Hope this helps xx

HOW TO MASTER THE ART OF SELF-VALIDATION:

Remember the longest relationship you have in life is the one with yourself. While we all need an external support system to be well-rounded & healthy individuals, no one else will be with you throughout your entire life except for you. So, acting as your own best friend is the secret to living your happiest and most fulfilling life. You ultimately need to do what's best for you. Otherwise, you're damaging the only relationship you will have to confront in every aspect and stage of your life.

Acknowledge your humanity and fundamental right to have needs, goals, and personal desires. Validate your personhood and individuality. Remember you're only human and are bound to have your own physical/emotional limitations and preferences. If you would be willing to cater to others' schedules, boundaries, and limitations, give yourself this equal level of respect and expect others to do the same.

Know everyone is self-centered to a certain degree. No one cares about your happiness as much or is watching you as closely as you are. They all have themselves and their lives to worry about. People are paying attention to their own self-interests (or want you to accomplish things to boost their own credibility or self-esteem). Being your greatest personal cheerleader is the only way to fully give yourself the praise and spotlight you deserve for your accomplishments.

Self-confidence is magnetic. It is the secret to showing up as your best self in all areas of life. Being secure in yourself makes you a better friend, family member, lover, partner, spouse, professional, conversationalist, etc. Validating yourself will make you feel good, but also radiates into every relationship or interaction in your life.

Discover what you love about yourself. Reflect on the personality traits, skillsets, and behaviors you know to be admirable about yourself. Are you constantly making others laugh? Do you get endless praise for your cooking, drawing, singing, or problem-solving skills? Would people come to you first to manage a crisis like a champion? Are you a master disciplinarian when it comes to going to the gym or reading? Do people regularly compliment your outfits or nails? Think of all of the aspects of your being that make you unique and help you to feel content with your existing, authentic self.

Take control of your life to cultivate your ideal self. While you should consistently praise your naturally admirable qualities, remember that you always can change aspects of your life that will help you feel like your best self. Know that you're in control of your decisions and have the mental freedom to think & act in any way you desire to reach any goals or implement lifestyle changes to feel like the person you feel destined to be.

Block out the noise and negative self-talk. We're (almost always!) our worst critics. Consider every new experience or interaction as a learning opportunity. Mistakes and failures are life lessons that facilitate self-reflection and opportunities for growth. Remember not to beat yourself up for past mistakes: You did the best you could with the information you had at the time. If you weren't embarrassed by your past self, you never gave yourself the chance to evolve and grow. Every success, failure, and new life stage offers its own lessons and teachable moments. Remember that we're all our own unique life paths. Comparing your life to someone else's is like comparing apples and oranges. Both entities may be fruitful but have vastly different flavor profiles, growing seasons, and rates at which they ripen. As Dita Von Tesse shrewdly said: "You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches."

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE PLEASING:

Acknowledge that people-pleasing is a form of self-neglect. By prioritizing another person's desires or approval above your own, you're ultimately neglecting your physical, emotional, energetic, or spiritual needs. Consider acting in your best in your own best interest as an act of self-care that safeguards your well-being.

Set boundaries. State your limitations, calmly, clearly, and directly. Understand that boundaries are your response to other people's actions, not a means to control other people's behavior. An expectation would be to ask someone not to call you during the workday. A boundary is stating that you will not pick up the phone during the workday and will only make/return calls in the evening after leaving the office.

Communicate your needs & expectations clearly. While you can't control what others will do, being upfront with your needs and expectations can eliminate unnecessary stress, logistical issues, misplaced hurt feelings, or disappointment in any type of relationship. Direct communication between parties will allow you both to respect each other's boundaries and to prioritize interactions that are mutually more positive, helpful, and emotionally nourishing.

Express your "no" freely (and without over-explaining). Remember that "No" is a complete sentence. You do not owe someone your time or emotional energy simply because they asked or expect you to do something/attend an event out of perceived obligation/guilt or simply to make someone else happy. Making sure you're okay is your first priority. Feel free to say "no" to any requests that would emotionally drain you, make you overextend yourself, or compromise any of your personal values/goals/priorities. You don't need to justify your needs. Just kindly decline, and let it be.

Remain consistent with your boundaries & priorities. People will treat you how you let them treat you. Once you set a boundary or share your priorities will someone, stick to these words through your actions to show you're serious about how you expect to be treated. Teach people how to interact with you in a way that doesn't feel self-sacrificing. No one will respect your boundaries and priorities if you don't and are easily swayed to forgo these self-imposed standards on a day-to-day or case-by-case basis.

Consider the long-term consequences of people-pleasing. While it may appease immediate conflict or anxiety, people-pleasing offers a one-way ticket to resentment and misplaced anger. By ignoring our own needs for the sake of others, we place unspoken expectations on these individuals' obligations to reciprocate our emotional labor – whether it be with their future actions or matching our generosity with unprompted favors or emotional support. We start keeping score as we continuously give ourselves over to others of perceived obligation. When someone doesn't return the favor, we get upset, despite never expressing this expectation of someone else or that we're even self-sacrificing in any way. This can lead to us feeling depleted or guilt-tripping others, and from their perspective, seemingly out of nowhere. It is best to remember we always have a choice whether to give to others and it should be of a genuine desire, love, or support for the other person – not as a way to gain external validation or manipulate a situation to create a false sense of obligation that we keep ourselves or the receiving party beholden to. Think of your energy, time, and personal resources given to others as a gift, not a bargaining chip.

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rie-092 · 6 months

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IDIOT

⟡﹒ ashioki oushi x nagi! reader

summary : oushi doesn't like you, period.

⊂ rei: i'm a sucker for this guy and i haven't seen fanfics about him >:/ i'm so close on making a ff about him, i swear. ⊃

everyone could see how much oushi hates your guts. but he swears, he has good reasons why the fuck he hates you so much. first, because you are annoying. second, because you are too lazy for his liking (he made the whole damn project on that one project when the two of you got assigned together as partners which is so unfair) and third, but not the least, you are itsuomi's younger sister.

whenever the two of you were together, it's either oushi was so pissed and dragging you around or yelling at you. or he practically gave up and accepted his fate and just seat next to you, blankly eating bread since there was no vacant seat in the cafeteria. and everyone really prefers the second one because they only have a peaceful time whenever the two of you aren't together or whenever you and oushi aren't fighting.

but it was different in the perspective of selected individuals. like yuki, who always notices the change of expression in oushi's face whenever he sees you. sure, he still has that resting bitch face but— yuki couldn't deny the fact that oushi's face always softens a little bit whenever he sees you. while on the other hand, your older brother, itsuomi knows how lazy you are and how much you hates interacting with humans. but it was different when you were with oushi.

he can see the change in your behaviour, he noticed how you smile more often than usual. or how your face brightens up whenever your eyes see oushi. or how much you were enjoying school because of oushi. both yuki, itsuomi and the others can see the fact that you and oushi like each other. but the two of you were way too stubborn to notice that fact and it was frustrating for them.

actually, despite claiming that you hate each other. the two of you often hang out with each other. arcades, movies, eating in your and oushi's favourite fast food chains, taking you out for shopping— just name it, because oushi was sure that he already visited or done it with you. while others exclaimed that it was date— you and oushi are dating. you and oushi was like 'wtf are you talking about? we're just bored and he/she happens to be free that day?'

i can see that the first one who realized their feeling was oushi. you see, this guy despite his grumpy attitude was very well aware of his surroundings and his own feelings. i can see how awkward he will be when he realises his feelings. but when he saw you being dense as hell — he was pissed. it was much easier when he fell in love with yuki, but it wasn't the same for you 'cause you were so stupid in oushi's eyes.

but seeing how you unconsciously showing your affections to him. like letting him rest his head on your shoulder, staying with him whenever he has problem, giving him small gifts (mainly handmade) was enough to convince oushi that you like him too. and he fucking loves it.

wanna hear how he confessed his feelings? oh, i'll tell ya. so, you got invited to a certain gathering with your seniors along with oushi and they started teasing you and oushi, asking things like ‘are you guys dating~?’ and you denied it. and boy, you made a wrong move because it only pissed oushi so much. and by the time that the gathering was finished, oushi grabbed that chance to confront you about it.

“what made you think that i don't want to date you?”

“what?”

“i'm pretty sure that your ears are working properly, (first name).”

“meanie.”

“and you're a big idiot.”

so, we all know the fact that he eas rejected by yuki. and that was the main reason why he was scared to fall in love again. but damn, you just came into his life— wrecking the damn wall that he built around his heart.

and now you're saying that it's impossible for the two of you to date because he hates you? what are you, and idiot? or you just hates using that damn pea-size brain of yours?

so while you were happily telling him the various reasons why he doesn't want to date you. he mumbled an apology which you didn't heard properly and before you could react— you already felt his lips on you. you blinked, surprised. while on the other hand, oushi smirked seeing the pink dust on your cheeks.

you were about to ask what was that for when oushi rested his forehead on yours, not even bothering to break the eye contact as he spoke with the most gentle tone that he can. saying the words that you didn't expected to hear from him outta all people in this universe.

oushi is a sweet guy, i swear. despite of being grumpy and short fused. he was more than willing to do anything for the girl that he like.

oh, by the way. expect a lot of cuddles, kisses and gifts from him once you agreed to become his girlfriend. don't worry, he will make sure that you won't regret agreeing to become his girlfriend because he is more than willing to give the whole world. also, expect that he will probably tutor you when you fail the exams. jeez, what an idiot— but you are his idiot.

“i like you, idiot. happy now?”

#ashioki oushi #a sign of affection #yubisaki to renren #fluff headcanons #fluff #reader insert #anime x reader #headcannons #i love him so much #anime headcanons #shoujo manga #oushi x reader #please make a lot of fanfictions about him #i beg of you #pleaseee #sweet

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astrosouldivinity · 9 months

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Venus Sign Observations: 💞🤎💞

Mutable Venus Edition: ♾️

Pisces Venus: 🌊

🌊 Pisces Venus is open-minded when it comes to various love styles, which can be attributed to their mutable water nature. They possess a remarkable ability to offer unconditional love to virtually everyone they come across.

🌊 In intimate relationships, they enjoy pleasing their partners and don’t mind adapting to their partners love style/needs especially if that would make them happy.

🌊 Venus in Pisces can get obsessed with their partner too high-key. They are flighty but obsessed at the same time which can be confusing for their partner. However, I think their love can be pretty intense in general.

🌊 As loving as Pisces Venus are, I think it’s lowkey a f-boy/girl placement. They have a tendency to fall in love quickly, but they can also move on just as swiftly. However, the process of moving on can sometimes take a considerable amount of time for them as well. Their emotions can be chaotic, leading them to appear flighty in their relationships.

🌊 Pisces Venus doesn’t always want to be floating around in love. They yearn for a secure and comforting space to calm their emotional waves. Essentially, they desire a safe haven where they can find solace and relaxation in their relationships.

🌊 Venus in Pisces will love all of you even the darkness that is kept tucked away. It truly doesn’t scare them. So long as you keep up with their fantasy, don’t take advantage of them, and hurt them too many times to the point where they can’t forgive you, they aren’t going anywhere.

🌊 Venus in Pisces tend to be open-minded when it comes to relationships, they may even be open to polyamory, but they are not opposed to monogamy either. Their preference for one or the other depends on their other placements. For example, as a Pisces Venus myself, I am capable of being loyal when the situation calls for it. This ability to navigate both relationship styles can be attributed to my Taurus Sun/Mars placements, which provide stability and a sense of commitment.

🌊 Having a Gemini Moon further enhances my openness to explore different relationship dynamics. However, I will only participate in them if I am with a partner who is mature about it. I’ve been with people before that were non-monogamous but didn’t like it when I was the same way. Like, babe, I'm simply matching your energy.

Sagittarius Venus: 🏹

🏹 Sagittarius Venus is open-minded when it comes to choosing a partner. In fact, they are more likely to have a partner from a foreign country or a different cultural background. However, they do have a fear of commitment. Which often leads them to explore various relationship dynamics, as they value their freedom and independence.

🏹 In their intimate relationships, Venus in Sagittarius likes to maintain an easy-going nature. They prefer to let things unfold naturally and avoid rushing into anything. Clinginess is not well-received by them, as it gives them a sense of discomfort when their freedom is suffocated or suppressed.

🏹 They may be more inclined to explore relationship dynamics such as ethical non-monogamy or open relationships. Their love for diverse experiences extends to their romantic life, and they may find fulfillment in connecting with many different individuals.

🏹 Venus in Sagittarius’s adventurous nature and desire for new encounters can make them more open to exploring non-traditional relationship structures that allow for multiple connections.

🏹 While Sagittarius Venus have a tendency to value their freedom, they are still capable of committing to a relationship. However, it requires finding the right person. Like someone who shares their open-mindedness and free-spirited nature. They need someone who won’t restrict them.

Gemini Venus: 🦋

🦋 Gemini Venus are adaptable with their approach to love. They will adjust their mindset and actions when it comes to matters of the heart. While they may appear flighty and free-spirited in their romantic endeavors, once they make a decision to commit to a partner, they are decisive and fully dedicated.

🦋 Gemini Venus are witty and possess a great sense of humor. They enjoy playful banter and need someone who can match their energy and make them laugh overall.

🦋 Venus in Gemini values intellectual stimulation in their relationships. They seek a partner who is not only intelligent but also intriguing and captivating. They desire someone who can engage in meaningful conversations and challenge their thoughts and beliefs. The ability to broaden their perspectives is essential for them, as they thrive on continuous learning and growth.

🦋 They appreciate partners who are open to new ideas, experiences, and perspectives. Gemini Venus enjoys exploring different viewpoints and needs a partner who can also embrace diversity and adapt to new situations.

🦋 They are attracted to partners who can strike a balance between nurturing the connection and allowing each other to flourish as individuals.

🦋 Venus in Gemini values their independence and needs a partner who will respect and appreciate this aspect of their personality. It is important for them to be with someone who has their own interests and hobbies, as they believe in the importance of maintaining individuality within a relationship.

Virgo Venus: 🍃

🍃 Virgo Venus tends to approach love and relationships with a practical and analytical mindset. They value stability and reliability in their partnerships, seeking a strong foundation based on trust and mutual support.

🍃 They often have high standards in their intimate relationships, but it stems from their desire to see their partner reach their highest potential. They genuinely want their loved ones to be the best version of themselves.

🍃 In their intimate relationships, Venus in Virgo values self-improvement and personal growth. They always strive to become better versions of themselves and expect the same from their partners.

🍃 Intellectual stimulation and engaging conversations are important to Virgo Venus, as they enjoy exchanging ideas and learning overall.

🍃 Venus in Virgo has a strong desire to fix and save others, driven by their compassionate aura. However, their giving and selfless nature can make them vulnerable to being taken advantage of by others.

🍃 In their intimate relationships, they prioritize finding someone who fits seamlessly into their lifestyle and meets their high standards. However, if they genuinely love someone, they are willing to be more flexible and make compromises.

🍃 Virgo Venus values cleanliness, organization, and orderliness in their surroundings, and this preference often extends to their relationships as well. They appreciate partners who are responsible, hardworking, and self-sufficient.

🍃 Open-minded when it comes to different love styles. They are willing to try anything once, especially if it makes their partner happy. Open relationships could be a possibility for them, especially if they have other mutable placements.

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patricia-taxxon · 9 days

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hi, sorry if this is something you've said before and I missed it, but since conceptualizing Amber and Avery, has the way you want to be addressed by the parasocial internet hoard changed at all? is Patricia Taxxon still a singular entity that goes by she/it? Or are they a group of two entities who individually go by she/it and collectively are they/them in the plural sense?

it occurs to me that when I reblogged you yesterday I used plural they/them out of the habit I've formed talking about other systems I know, but its been bothering me since then that like, you never told people to do that, and it feels weird to they/them you even in the completely epicene "multiple entities" sense without your go-ahead. i know that your self conceptualization at this point is more complicated than "i'm definitely a plural system" so there's that too.

anyway, hope you're faring well, and I basically just want to be able to refer to you comfortably. see you on the internets

Thanks for asking, I'm not entirely sure yet. I'm still using singular first person pronouns naturally, cus it feels like I'm one point of view exchanging emotions, preferences, and identity between two different consistent clusters of traits that I call Avery and Amber. Which one I am at any given time is only really crucial information for my friends who have to talk with me. It helps to personify us sometimes, like when I feel Avery clambering to front, but it probably won't be important for everyone in my audience to participate. Patricia is still one entity that prefers she or it.

Basically, the only boundary that I think concerns most of you, cute dog furry asks are fine but cute raccoon asks are not. Avery just likes indulging in roleplaying as a dumb animal wayyyyy more.

#cilantromixture #patricia taxxon ask

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rirabeko · 2 months

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Some of Baji's mischaracterization that gives me the ICK

It's 2024 and there are people out there who still can't understand Baji's character and mischaracterize him heavily, mostly because of the Bajifuyu ship.

DISCLAIMER: You can ship whoever you want. I'm just tired of seeing my favourite character constantly being mischaracterized because of toxic shippers. Also I'm not a shipper myself, I do not romanticize any of the relationships I mention below.

The biggest issue with Baji's character is the fact that Bajifuyu shippers (and sometimes just the fandom in general) constantly ignore Kazutora's role in Baji's life, meanwhile Kazutora made a huge impact on Baji's character. You can clearly see it not just in the anime or in the manga, but in the spin-off too.

Baji and Kazutora were that duo, they were a literal separated team within Toman. They met naturally, become friends instantly and spent most of their time together (many times without Toman). It's accepted by the fandom, that Kazutora's first real friend was Baji, but also Baji's first close friend was Kazutora.

Obviously Mikey and Baji were close as kids, but after Baji moved to a different place they weren't that close. I bet this is the reason why Baji didn't know about Shinichiro's bike shop, since when they met regularly Baji was a little kid and Shinichiro was a teenager without a bike shop. It also shows that Mikey and Baji aren't that close, they are more like childhood buddies than close friends.

I can talk about this for hours but now I only wrote it as a small disclaimer, before I get into my points, so let's go.

I am sick of it when:

they call Baji stupid (he literally outsmarted Kisaki, being smart not equals only book smart)

people headcanon him as a mean, aggressive, abusive bf (he is canonly no.1 best lover and he literally died because he has a heart of gold, let this bs go pls)

they can't understand the reason behind his suicide and make it a ship war (ICK)

people can't accept the fact Baji loves his friends differently, and not everyone is his bestie (it doesn't mean he does not love them, or prefers someone over the other but love can be different towards different people and it's absolutely normal!)

they make his character all about Bajifuyu (he is an individual, stop bringing up Chifuyu EVERYTIME when it comes to Baji. His character is much more than a guy in a dominant-submissive fanmade yaoi ship people like dragging him into!)

they make Chifuyu the good, perfect friend while constantly dragging Baji down and made him the bad guy in their relationship (I could write a whole essay just about this being a bullshit)

when they romanticize Bajifuyu (Baji canonly sees Chifuyu as a younger brother figure said by Baji's mom, but there are people out there who still believes unironically that they are in love... WHY?)

they ignore that Baji is very caring and affectionate not just towards Chifuyu, he is like this because these are his own personality traits. He behaves like this with everyone who's close to him. (Mikey, Kazutora, Ryuusei and just Toman in general)

people say Chifuyu was the only one who understood Baji's feelings and aims (the literal reason Baji died was because no one really understood his goals and behaviour, not even Chifuyu)

they romanticize Chifuyu's obsessiveness towards Baji (if Chifuyu was a girl, he would be cancelled for this behaviour immediately, but the double standard won again)

people make his death an opportunity to romanticize Bajifuyu (biggest ICK)

they say Baji is only distant with Chifuyu beacuse he is a tsundere (there are so many situations when Chifuyu truly annoys Baji, e.g. he said it many times that Chifuyu's infatuation really disturbs him and asked Chifuyu to stop)

Bajifuyu shippers ignore and hate Kazutora just because he disturbs their ship

they say Baji was a bad influence to Kazutora (Kazutora hung out with gangs even before he met Baji, he was already a part of the underworld. the reason Kazutora turned out that way was his abusive father and his horrible childhood in general. Baji literally saved him, and he could finally be himself around Baji without any judgement or harassment)

they ignore or even DENY Bajitora's bond because of Bajifuyu

they accept Bajifuyu, Kazufuyu or even the Bajitrio but HATE Bajitora (the biggest bullshit ever)

they can't recognise the fanservice of Bajifuyu and calls them canon because of the clear fanservice acts

people think Bajitora is one sided (more Baji sided) meanwhile Tora loves Baji more than his own life and shows it many times how much he loves Baji and how much Baji means to him

they accept that Chifuyu never changed his hairstyle after Baji made it for him (and obviously they romanticize it) but they are hating because Kazutora looked exactly like Baji in bad toman timeline

people ignore Bajitora and always forgets that they are very close to each other in every timeline. the new panels Wakui drew were also about Kazutora putting Chifuyu to his place after Chifuyu completly ignored Tora and disturbed his time with his best friend. (we all know Kazutora is very possessive with Baji for obvious reasons and does not tolerate being disrespected by someone)

The list could go on and on but these are the main problems I still see in this fandom when it comes to Baji's character.

I'm tired of seeing this amazingly well-written character turns into a boring, abusive, mean guy by the fandom who is only an abuser in a toxic fanmade yaoi ship.

SIDE NOTE:

To all the people who dislike him/call him mean and aggressive because he beat Chifuyu up:

This anime is based on a manga which takes place in the early 2000's gangster world in Japan. He is the captain of the 1st division, he is the leader, and his role is not just to be the strongest in the division but also to manage his team, bc this is also what a leader does. If someone is disrespectful, breaks the rules and shows a bad example to the others he has to punish them. In this world this is how things go. This won't make him a bad person, or an aggressive jerk. Baji can be very calm and collected when it comes to leading his division. He is a very good leader, who takes care of his teammates, so no surprise he is really loved by his division.

Also when he beat Chifuyu up before joining Valhalla: he hated himself for doing that. But he had to, he had no other choice. And Chifuyu had every right to stand up against Baji and tell him he's not doing it. But since Chifuyu never questions Baji's decisions as the captain of the first division he agreed with this one too, and also because he wanted to help him. Chifuyu knew exactly what he was doing when he let Baji doing this to him, and he went along with it. Stop bringing this up everytime and use it against Baji.

#tokyo revengers #baji keisuke #kazutora hanemiya #chifuyu matsuno #bajifuyu #bajitora #mischaracterization #baji #kazutora #chifuyu #tokyo manji gang #bajitrio #anime

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