#feel good about yourself for making my week /srs

[youguysfromjersey]

No context 🤩🤩

[the-moon-devi]

Happy Spring Equinox, and Aries SZN! 🐏

🔆 Neptune in 2h: This placement can be very tricky because Neptune rules illusions & confusion. If you have this in your solar return, BEWARE, there's a chance you will experience uncertainty when it comes to things like tax returns and finances in general. This is also the house of self-worth, so this could indicate confusion in this area. Even a loss or drop in self-confidence. 

🔆 Saturn in 1h: This can manifest in many different ways. But usually you may feel restricted in some way this year, this could even lead to you feeling like an elderly person as you become more mature. The universe will send you a lot of roadblocks this year, and it may feel like you are constantly stuck in life. My advice us to roll with the tides literally, and don't get too down. Because this can also lead to depression. If you've already experienced your Saturn return, this may be a bit easier for you as someone who is still in the beginning stages of their life. Saturn may bring up old lessons and test you to make sure you've learned your lesson.

🔆 Taurus/Libra Asc: These Ascendants are ruled by venus. So already we can see that the year will most likely be intel, venusian based events & circumstances. Such as Love, beauty, finances, business, and socialization. The house Venus sits in can show where most of your focus will be. 

🔆 Sun in 3h: May show an increase in popularity, you may be learning a lot, and involved in social media. Talking more with people online, and even meeting people with similar interests. For my 2023 SR my sun landed in the 3rd house, and about a week after my birthday I started tumblr. It got more attention than I expected. I also had the asteroid Webb (3041) in the 1h and Fama at 29° in 11h. So that probably just added a little boost and shows that it was meant for me to start this blog.

Edit: (I actually had a 3rd house stellium)

🔆 Venus 4h: You or your mother may be more interested in beautifying your house, according to the position of Venus in the 4th house. This also indicates that your home life may be more peaceful, unless Uranus or Mars is present, which can show movement. Furthermore, Venus can indicate romance for the year, along with the 7th house. If you engage in romantic conversations, you may experience deep emotional connections with people. Also, you may find yourself meeting very familiar people, even if you haven't met them in this lifetime, and it can feel like you have met them before. The 4th house is very karmic, so it can show partners from the past coming back, whether that be good or bad. However, you can find yourself feeling nurtured within connections or doing the nurturing. Additionally, you may meet romantic partners from home, which could mean that you could meet them online or through family. Overall, your love life will be private and possibly more secure.

🔆 Lilith 7h: According to my natal x Sr chart, Lilith sat in my 1st house while in my separate Sr chart, she was in my 7th house. This indicates that Lilith dominated my experiences in 2023, and as a result, Lilith and I have become friends. Lol. When it comes to relationships, expect the unexpected, similar to Uranus in the 7th house or conjunct the Descendant. Lilith in the 7th house brings taboo experiences when it comes to partners and long-term relationships. Your relationships may have a significant taboo nature to them. In my case, I had vertex and Lilith in my 7th house, which indicates not only taboo encounters but also fated meetings.

🔆 Sun in 9h: Will point towards a year of exploration and studying/learning new things. You may travel a lot during this year, or if you're seeking to study a big topic, expect to learn a lot. This could change your view of life. 9h is traditionally the house of God. More than likely, you'll find yourself learning more about God or feeling a calling to get closer to the masculine part of God.

🔆 Sun 3h: In the previous sun 3h note, I should have mentioned that the 9h represents the house of God, while the 3h represents the house of the goddess. If you have the sun in the 3h house of your Sr, you may find yourself tapping deeper into your feminine side. This can unlock your creativity and help you manifest your desires by using the ancient principles of the universe. Use your feminine charm to attract what you want and your feminine touch to expand your creative hobbies and talents. As someone who already has a spiritual nature and a sun in the 3h house of my Sr, I have felt a stronger pull to tap into my feminine energy, and have learned a lot about this aspect of my life.

🔆 Sharing the same Sr placement as a partner/friend: If you have this with a person you know, you guys could be super close and/or share a lot of the same experiences that year.

🔆 Vibilia 1h: Vibilia is the name for the Roman goddess of travel. @themedialmercurial made a post on this asteroid. I'll link it below. So you guys can go check your natal placements. However, in the 1h for SR charts, this asteroid can point towards guaranteed travel or even life-taking you through many journeys. The sign may give more insight into how this may play out. Also, it's a bonus if you have planets in the 9h house as well. Vibilia post: 1 2 3

Asteroid number (copy & paste) 

144

🔆 Juno 7h: May feel a need to commit or get in a relationship this year. Juno represents commitment and partnerships and with it entering the house of pong term partnerships/marriage. It's not uncommon to see these natives getting engaged, married, or entering a long-term connection. This will be even more prominent if you have a vertex here as well. 

SR Ascendant Ruler can show where a lot of your focus will be this year. 

🔆 1H RULER IN 3H: Your focus this year will be learning, traveling, writing, social media, and acquiring new skills. I would also recommend looking at where the planet of your solar return ascendant is in your natal chart. 

🔆 1H RULER IN 6H: Your focus this year will be work, schedules/routines, and health. You may struggle or gain in this area. You may find yourself wanting to create a steady schedule to keep yourself organized. You may also take on more responsibilities this year, this will be a year of working. Putting in those hours to get what you want, you could even be more prone to illnesses/ enemies this year. Your co-workers/work environment will affect you a lot. I would also recommend looking at where the planet of your solar return ascendant is in your natal chart. 

🔆 1H RULER IN 5H: Your focus this year will be having fun, doing what brings you joy, and possibly a lot of short-term flings. You may find yourself attending a lot more outings and parties. If not this then you'll be having a lot of attention and working on creative endeavors. This is a year of pleasure and individuality. So do what your heart desires, and take more of an interest in you. Associate yourself with people who make you happy. On the downside, you could become overly involved in partying, drinking, etc, and this may become detrimental to you. I would also recommend looking at where the planet of your solar return ascendant is in your natal chart. 

🔆 1H RULER IN 9H: Your focus this year will be travel, attaining wisdom, and becoming closer to God. You may be seen as adventurous and knowledgeable this year. People may be to you for advice this year as well. Travel and possibly even moving is a big chance here as well. Education, God, your beliefs, religion or spirituality, and life views will be important as well. I would also recommend looking at where the planet of your solar return ascendant is in your natal chart. 

🔆 1H RULER IN 2H: Your focus this year will be finances, assets, financial investments, financial literacy, and working to improve yourself and/or your worth. You may put a lot of energy towards building yourself up for a valuable future. And also enjoying yourself more or even spending more money. You may make a bug purchase this year that impacts your finances. I would also recommend looking at where the planet of your solar return ascendant is in your natal chart. 

🔆 Vertex in your Solar Return shows fated events that you WILL experience this year. These events will be signs of a pivotal point in your life and will affect the rest of your year. 

Vertex in 1h: Your appearance, how others see you, a person you meet may change how you and others view you

Vertex in 5h: You may experience a lot of joy and pleasure, sexual encounters, short-term flings, babies/children, creativity

Vertex in 6h: health, work, schedule/routines, more responsibility

Vertex in 7h: partners, may meet a long-term partner/marriage partner, weddings, and a venus-ruled/dominant person

Vertex in 8h: Strong passionate connections, intimacy, your shadow self, a very big life altering experience, inheritances, and death.

Vertex in 9h: travel, higher education, spiritual teachers, and your beliefs

Vertex in 10h: your career, reputation, authority figures, and accomplishments

Vertex in 11h: friend groups, worldly topics, friends, your goals and wishes

Vertex in 12h: spirituality, dreams, solitude, and illnesses

Vertex in 2h: finances, assets, family/generational wealth, resources. What is valuable to you, and gains

Vertex in 3h: speech, writing, neighbors, siblings/cousins, everyday commute, popularity, and social media

Vertex in 4h: Your mother, your home life, moving houses, your ancestry/roots, women in the family, your womb, and emotions.

🔆 Valentine (447) 1h: This asteroid represents love and is one of the strongest love asteroids, in my opinion. This occupying the 1h shows that you will most likely be falling in love especially if this conjuncts your asc, because it's also making an aspect to your dsc (7h, the house of partners/relationships). This will sweep you off your feet, and Valentine shows a sacrificial kind of love. Likely, you'll find yourself doing things you never thought you would do for love. This can be indicative of realizing you have fallen in love with a partner. 

🔆 Destinn (6583) 7h: This asteroid in solar return shows what is destined to happen this year. In the 7h, it will be destined for you to meet, get married, or get into a long-term impactful commitment. This encounter will likely feel fated. 

🔆 Sun conjunct Amor (1221) /Cupido (763): You could be a lover girl/boy this year. Amor means "love" in English. So, this being conjunct, your sun can show that some of this year's themes will be love. Cupido shows that Cupid will be shooting you with an arrow of love. You will find yourself deeply admiring a love interest. These are just the beginning stages of the strong feelings you will feel for this person. Expect a year of love. 

🔆 Lovelock (51663) 7h: You will likely meet a romantic partner whom you are deeply attached and form a deep loving bond with. This can show that you'll be locked and in love with this person as well. 

🔆 Union (1585) 7h: Imma keep this sweet & short.... yeah, you'll be coming into union with your person more than likely. This asteroid represents a union. Marriage is also likely to occur. 

Ps: Union conjunct sun can also signify this! 

🔆 Sunshine (3742) conjunct Venus: ☀️ Sunshine conjunct Venus, can show happiness when it comes to finances & love. You can experience great bliss and luck, it'll be like a breath of fresh air.

🔆 North Node conjunct Sunshine (3742): You will experience a lot of happiness this year if you have been having sadness/depression. This shows a forecast of Sunshine! Good days are ahead

🔆 Sunshine (3742) 1h: Similar to the north node, you will find yourself being very happy & satisfied with life and yourself. You could have an increase in self-confidence. You'll also be seen as a beam of light by those around you. Be sure to get a lot of sun, and summertime could benefit you greatly.

🔆 Briede (19029)/ Groom (5129) 1h/7h: likely to meet your spouse or be a bride/groom.

🔆 Boda (1487) conjunct Vertex: This shows a fated wedding happening. 

🔆 Vertex conjunct Alma (390): the point of fate meets the asteroid of the soul/soulmates. These two combined can show an encounter with a soulmate 

🔆 Eros (433) 1h/ conjunct asc: Eros is sexual attraction, in the 1h this shows you will experience sexual encounters & romance. 

🔆 2h ruler in 12h: Your finances may go through losses when it comes to finances. On the other hand, this can also show receiving money from hidden sources, or through spiritual practices. This can also show that manifestation and visualization can help you attract money. Since, the 2h is 11 places away from the 12h, and the 11th house rules dreams, goals, and aspirations. You can set a lot of unreasonable goals for your finances this year. The 12h is also the house of expenditures as it is ruled by Jupiter/Neptune. So you can gain a lot of money but also spend a lot, or either spend more than you have. If traveling abroad, you can spend a lot of money traveling. Be careful not to get scammed this year, and be watchful of your money because it could even get stolen or lost. Also spending money on spirituality. You will value your spirituality and alone time. 

🔆 2h ruler in 7h: Your finances will likely go towards a partner or a relationship, you could be the provider for your partner/spouse. This could show spending money on a business, or a wedding. This shows you will value your relationships. 

🔆 2h ruler in 2h: The 2h lord in the 2h, shows you will value money a lot this year, you'll have tunnel vision when it comes to finances. You can spend money trying to make money and investing. This is honestly pretty good for investing. You could also be wanting to spend money on things that have great value and bring you quality.

 

🔆 2h ruler in 8h: This combination, shows that you may be sharing your money, or even joining your assets with a close partner. This is the house of shared finances and joint ventures. So don't be surprised if you and your partner open up a shared account. This can show spending money on businesses. There may be inheritances, or loans involved this year. 

🔆 4h ruler in 12h: This year may indicate spending a lot of time at home, alone. This can also show deep emotional problems coming up. You can find your origins within spirituality, and even experience loneliness in your home life. The 12h rules foreign settlement, and the 4h is the home, so this may also show moving abroad, or finding a home in a foreign place. This can also indicate a strong spiritual connection to your ancestors. With the 4h showing what brings us comfort, this can show that spirituality, alone time, and water/foreign travel will bring you comfort. 

🔆 4h ruler in 9h: Similar to the 12h but less emotional, this can also show traveling, and find comfort, in traveling or settling in a place that is foreign to you. You will be expanding your horizons this year, and more than likely finding a new home. This can even show not having the most stable home, like you may travel a lot this year!

🔆 4h ruler in 7h: You may find yourself moving in with a partner, or being in a relationship that brings you a lot of comfort, and emotional security. This may be the year where you establish a long-lasting relationship. 

🔆 Pluto conjunct IC/ 4h: Your home life will change, and go through a transformation. This is an indication of moving to a new home! Your sense of security will be shaken up. This will be softened if you have the moon or Venus in the 4th house as well because Pluto can be super intense.

🔆 Uranus conjunct IC/ 4H: This is another big indicator of moving, and most likely a long-distance travel and it could be random. Because Uranus represents unexpected shocking changes, and it'll most likely happen very fast. 

🔆 Uranus conjunct DC/7H: This shows your partnerships, which will be surprising. There may be something unexpected happening in this area, this doesn't always have to be horrible especially if you have benefic planets here as well. If it's here alone, then this may show a long distance or relationship that has a lot of ups and downs. This can show your partners may be unconventional in any sense, they could even be from a different caste than you. With Venus and Uranus here, you may unexpectedly get engaged, or married. This can show an unexpected/ surprising love meeting as well. 

🔆 Fortuna (19) in 1h/conjunct ASC: This placement, can indicate fortune and luck coming to you this year!

🔆 Fortuna (19) in 2h: Fortune when it comes to your finances, and extra money. 

🔆 Atira (163693) in 1h/conjunct ASC: This asteroid represents prosperity through selflessness, so this year you may find you do things for others that bring you abundance. You may have to make sacrifices this year to gain something bigger & better. 

🔆 Midas (1981) in 1h/ conjunct ASC: Everything you touch this year will turn to gold. Your skills/talents will bring you a lot of abundance. Others will see you as a source of good luck. Expect major fortunes this year. 

🔆 Amalthea (113) in 1h/conjunct ASC: Amalthea represents infinite abundance, so this one is pretty self-explanatory. This year, money will find you regardless of circumstances, you could receive massive amounts of opportunities, and lucky situations coming towards you. This could even show blessings when it comes to your physical appearance. 

🔆 Opportunity (39382): Depending on the house placement can show where you are likely to receive the opportunity this year. In the 1st house you will be brought many opportunities, you can have many chances to go towards your goals. In the 2h, your finances, and how much money you spend. This could result in having many opportunities to make or spend money, or even save. This could also be great for investments.

🔆 Tyche (258) in 2h: Luck in finances...

I hope you guys enjoyed this! Happy New Year, and let me know if you want to see my solar return chart for 2024!

𝐃𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐃𝐞'𝐋𝐮𝐱𝐞

𝐇𝐨𝐭 𝐀𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

[greenboyfriend]

choose a fish to fill you with whimsy & glee! (tarot reading)

"what can you look forward to?" image 1: this guy's got it all figured out. he's able to breathe above water due to the bowl of water superglued to his face. one might even assume he has prosthetic legs, or perhaps even feet... image 2: the ideal male figure... you may not like it, but it's a fish with a broom as a tail and no internal organs. image 3: a fish that doesn't resemble anything in particular. no... not at all! image source not everything may resonate with you, and that's ok! take what does & leave the rest. don't force it.

1.・。.・゜✭

you guys!!! there is something very wonderful in store for you, so long as you’re able to get yourself out of this rut! you may be feeling powerless, suffering some sort of attack, and being forced into the role of the victim. however! justice means to tell you that there is a major change that must be made on your part. instead of letting yourself be victimized, take action! use those emotions you’re feeling to tackle this challenge with passion– take that risk!! don’t be afraid to get creative, too. above all, and no matter what it takes, you’re going to need to address this, and with confidence.  in a broader sense, this situation is teaching you how to overcome a fear of yours. maybe you’re not the best at asserting yourself, but that’s ok! we’re all learning!! take this as a step in the right direction.  the extremely right direction, i might add, as the 9 of cups and justice seem to imply, this will be a very fruitful endeavor for you. the 9 of cups is often referred to as the “wish” card, because it represents having your wish fulfilled. after you take action, i see this result leaving you feeling quite pleased with yourself, and even a little smug! as you may know, justice is no card to be trifled with, so keep in mind that the actions you take regarding this situation will heed important results. do what you know is right and believe in yourself! you can do it!!! all of these cards are reversed-- except 10 of swords-- indicating that they're meant to inform your future actions (in the next few days, or next week). so don't worry if you haven't thought about it too much yet. but please remember that justice does not play! believe in yourself, you'll know when the time is right. there is some 18+ info beyond this point... click the link to read the rest but be warned its literally 2 sentences and NO ONE UNDER 18 SHOULD fucking READ IT! /srs link

(10 of swords, page of wands reversed, 9 of cups reversed, justice reversed)

2.・。.・゜✭

hello my silly little broom fish. you’ve been working hard! if you haven’t, expect to work hard soon! you will be taking on a new project or adventure, which will require your full attention. i’m thinking, some of you guys might be taking a new class, or be receiving training of some kind. you’re going to need to put your all into this! you may already have an idea of what to expect, but some things will be new, too. take the time to really get into the minute details, tie up loose ends, and recheck, then rerecheck, and rererecheck just for good measure.  this may also be a way for you to expand your horizons, and become a leader. if you have a good idea, share it! you may end up showing others the way, and being a representative of some kind. remember, though, to be painstaking about this, and really brush up on those fine details.  along the way, make sure you’re keeping yourself on course. if you need a moment to reflect and think about where you’re going, consider it a part of the process. while it is also a good idea to consider other perspectives, keep in mind that you’re here for a reason. you may have to assert your position & really push for your way of doing things. again, if someone else has an idea, don’t underestimate it, but don’t underestimate yourself, either! this may take the form of having to resist authority, and you may have to be firm. in doing this, you may also be able to reap a reward of some kind! remember, there are so many people in the world that would push for their perspective no matter what, even if they haven't researched it at all. based on the 8 of pentacles, you most certainly have researched, so believe in yourself! make that stand!!... well, when it comes to. all of these cards are reversed, so this situation is likely to come into fruition in the future-- in the next few days, or possibly next week. mull over it for a while. when you start to see the signs, seize your opportunity!

(8 of pentacles reversed, 3 of wands reversed, 7 of pentacles reversed, 7 of wands reversed)

3.・。.・゜✭

ok go off!!!! or somefin it’s time to commit to that regimen. whether that’s eating healthier, taking more time for yourself, or, if you’re like me, trying to practice more self kindness, creating an organized structure/routine is likely to help. so, for example, i’ll take my own life into account: i’ll often think certain thoughts can make me feel bad about myself without me totally realizing it, and lately i’ve been trying to change how i talk to myself. i use a systematic approach, in that i recognize the thought, then force myself to replace it with a positive one, instead. it seems silly at first, but the more that i stick to this method, the more success i’m seeing! this is just my example, but can be applied to your own situation! it’s always tough to start something new, but a month or two in, or maybe even a week, you see improvement. & it’s ok to make mistakes! you may be focusing too much on what you lack, or your shortcomings. there may also be setbacks keeping you from achieving your goals, or maybe you’re convinced that you made the wrong decision.  know that it’s always darkest before the dawn!! you may be in a bad place right now, and if you are, consider how you can make things easier on yourself. instead of letting yourself be a martyr, or feel powerless, do what you know will make you feel better. like that new god forsaken ariana venti song, be your own damn best… friend. it’s wise counsel. both of the readings above this are about the future, but for you, i think this is very much about the present. with all cards facing you except temperance, there is a story unfolding, where you complete some unfinished business, and find peace. the peace part is likely in the future, with it being reversed and all, but the time for action seems imminent, or already happening. i think you probably know what you need to do. whatever those plans are that you’ve been sitting on, make them happen! i just keep getting “declare yourself openly”!!! so do with that what you will.  you may even discover some sort of missing truth, keeping you from seeing things fully. you may also be swept up into the tides of change, and witness all the elements fit seamlessly into place. so hey! enjoy!

(the emperor, 5 of cups, 8 of wands, 10 of swords, temperance reversed)

[celestie0]

First time asker but long time reader 😭 I’m sorry that you got that shitty ask. It’s such a weird fucking thing to ask someone “hey when are you making these two fuck?” like… does that not feel weird to type out?

The gojo x reader tag has at least 5 explicit smut fics minimum daily, go read through those if you genuinely need sex in everything you read (it’s time to reflect on the porn addiction you have).

Regardless, I’ve been reading your fics on Ao3 and I absolutely LOVE the banter between gojo and reader 😭 it flows so fucking well I can feel the chemistry radiating from my screen. When I first started reading IHM, I was also an ancient hag like reader (29) so I found myself able to really relate to her. Usually when I envision Y/N, it’s a random person in their place but with this fic specifically idk why I lowkey insert myself? Everything she does, I would probably do the same and it makes me nervous (in a good way) that I’m gonna get attached to gojo and y/n’s relationship 😭

I absolutely love how gojo provides the security Y/N so desperately needs in the span of the fic. She has been suffocating on her own for so long that he just provides some fresh air. Dare I say meant to be?

The domesticity is everything and I like how we’re learning more about him alongside Y/N. So far we’ve seen just how supportive gojo has been and I’m excited to see how y/n comes through for him because my spidey senses (and your amazing writing) shows me that he has some baggage and it might resurface soon.

The build up to them realizing they love each other is making me giggle and kick my feet. I will happily eat whatever you feed us, thank you for sharing your writing with us. You absolutely have a talent for writing and fleshing out characters/relationships.

I appreciate you and will do my best to support you vocally from here on out 🥹 have a great week pls!

hi my love!! first of all thank you SO much for this supportive message, i srs teared up when i read it 😭 idk if that’s embarrassing to admit lololdjfsdfh but yea omg yesterday was rough so i can’t tell u how much it means to me

i agree on the porn addict thing omg like i love smut as much as the next person, but likeee to go into an author inbox after they just posted a 14k chap of their fic n say “are we gonna get smut soon?” like 💀 that’s sortaaaaa. i’m getting porn addiction vibes

aaaaaaaa i’m so happy you’re enjoying the banter in ihm :’’) and that you’re able to see yourself in reader’s shoes!! that’s such a wonderful thing n one of the aims of my writing ♥️ ♥️ also pls 29 is not ancient hag oml i mean there will be lots of rhetoric in ihm where reader thinks she’s old but like ultimately i want the message of the series to be that it’s never too late to start over and find happiness & joy :) i think that really applies to everything and everyone. and ahhh yes there will be some pretty angst stuffs BUT there will be happy ending <33

yes ihm gojo def got some baggage 😂😂 i need my men like that LOL. but thank you so much for being excited to see how reader comes through for him as well!! i know she’s going through a lot on her own, and that can sometimes cause her to neglect the things outside of her…but i think she has capacity to really be there for him too

oh my dear i really am so lucky to have you as a long time reader and i’m so grateful to hear your thoughts, but also please send them whenever you want to and without pressure <33 i will eat it tf up if/when you do but yea xD never feel burdened to! you have a wonderful week as well omg imma eat u fr

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 27 – NO POWERS

Bears and Mountains and Lumberjacks Oh My! by justanotherrollingstony (adoctoraday)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 24,344 Tags: Snowed In, Sharing a Bed, Smut

Summary: It was supposed to be easy--go meet the reclusive artist and buy some art. And then came the broken down car. And the snowstorm. And the lumberjack with a face like a greek god. So yea, Tony is stuck in a cabin in the woods with a hot lumberjack till the storm clears. Could be worse.

Reasons why I love it: Steve the lumberjack just... makes me feel things. A lot of things. Steve's-beard-appreciation-club things. I love everything about this fic, the setting, the characterizations, and the smut, holy god, it's so hot. If you haven't read this fic yet, do yourself a favor and get on it right now, because it's amazing!

colour me in love by starksnack

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 24,927 Tags: Artist Steve, After College AU, Friends to Lovers

Summary: [5:12 AM] Hey so I know you modeled for me like two years ago, but I really liked the work we did and was wondering if we could get together for coffee and talk about your possible participation in my upcoming project. Please let me know when you’re available. - SR Tony models for Steve. Basically two idiots in love.

Reasons why I love it: This fic is super cute and hot and even a little bit angsty in places, but what really stuck with me was the relationship Tony has with Steve's parents. The found family vibes are so lovely, and all the scenes where they cook and have dinner together make me so happy. Plus, the Stony romance is amazing, so I hope you check this one out!

Stop: Hammertime! by youcancallmearrow

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Bucky, Natasha/Sam Rating: G Words: 18,018 Tags: Office AU, Protective Steve, Found Family

Summary: When some asshole (*cough*Hammer*cough) puts out a hit on Tony, what are three translators, two security strategists and a Photoshop expert going to do about it? Turns out, a whole hell of a lot.

Reasons why I love it: Dun, dun, dun, the plot twist! It's so good! The whole premise of this fic almost feels like a movie, in the best possible way. I love the found family feels, and the dialogue is fucking hilarious the whole way through. In unrelated news, Nanna has my entire heart and must be protected at all costs. This fic is wonderful, and I hope you check it out for yourself!

[pianocat939]

I was listening to some asmrs and was like- hrm hrm I have an idea.

Tw: slightly implied both online and reality stalking, implied breaking in, obsessive turtaleles as per usual

Alright so imagine you listen to an asmrist (aka turtle of your choosing) and for the sake of plot let's say it's like an x listener type shit (now it can be platonic or romantic just something to interact to a user)

You listen to a few of their videos before slowly listening to all of their posts, including each and every new one. You like the sound of their voice, it's excellent for when you're sad or need help to sleep- just comforting company one might say.

You praise them with every new video, commenting on how you liked the story or the voice acting. And soon enough, they start to like all your comments and even occasional reply.

"Aww thanks! I'm glad you enjoy my videos! *insert an ungodly amount of heart emojis*"

"Ik I'm fabulous~ In all seriousness tho I'm happy you like my voice acting~"

"Why thank you. I'm delighted you are seemingly relishing my voice /srs/gen/pos."

"OMG IM LITERALLY SO HAPPY RN- I COULD SHOOT YOU WITH MY APPRECIATION GUN- I'm joking of course!"

But then you notice something odd.

Their content seems to lean towards things you tend to enjoy rather than a scatter of different ideas. And you swear you heard your name a couple of times. They seem to talk a bit more with a... loving tone like they've known the person for years. Close as one would simply state.

And finally one day, there's a new video uploaded. You of course watch it. Except for this time, there's no image as the background nor any sound effects. You then hear them speak, they speak so obsessively, so closely, it's like you can hear them smiling.

And at the end, as an outro they say:

(Romantic version)

A gift for my lovely significant other, Y/n. I hope you enjoyed it, especially you.

(Platonic version)

For my dearest friend, Y/n. I hope you find comfort in this audio~

You're creeped out, hoping that maybe they were speaking of another person who has the same name as you. But even then, it made you uneasy.

A few days later, you listen to another video by them, this one a bit more toned down than the last one you watched. It's nice, and you feel yourself being able to sleep by it.

And right as you're about to fall asleep, you feel someone climb into your bed from the other side, and hands caressing your head.

You hear a voice, one all too familiar:

(Romantic)

Darling~ Did you like it? Was the story good? I made sure to keep it within your interests. I hope you loved the sound of my voice...the voice that would talk sweet nothings to you to help you sleep. Sweet dreams, my love.

(Platonic)

Hey~ did you like it? I hope it made you feel better, I know your day today was tough. And I wanted to comfort you, but with a bit more love in it! Anything for my dearest best friend... Now sleep, you need your rest. I'll keep mumbling until you do.

You can't pull yourself to move, too fearful to do so. So you lay there, listening to them mumble about their affections as they pet your head. You can't deny it, it's still the same smooth voice you listened to every day, but this time- it brings the ultimate terror into your heart.

Since when did yandere asmrists become yanderes?

(I hope this makes up a fraction of the lack of content this week! And hopefully, I might get a little something out sometime this week because there's a big blizzard coming = snow day(s) and it's easter break)

[unoriginal-and-dumb]

heello do you have any tips for noobie artists? ur art is just so very neat to me :) plz never stop arting

Never do what I do unless it is drawing all the time

Use references!! Always use them!!! Seriously please use references never let a stupid little rat in your ear take that away from you, they are always so valuable

If you see art you like, don’t be afraid to basically try recreating the same exact thing. All you have to do is not claim it as youre own, and better yet don’t post it online! It’s for practice, people don’t need to see practice in the end it’s only for you

Tracing is NOT wrong. I’m tired of people saying ohhh tracing is bad don’t do it ITS LITERALLY NOT!!!! Just don’t trace over someone else’s work/images and claim it as your own it’s that easy. If youre struggling with hands take photos of your hands and trace over it! Break them down into simple forms until you have an understanding of them in a meaningful way!

Do some studies of specific things. Struggling with leg anatomy? Draw a page full of legs, just push and pull and scribble and see what works, study images and see how you can reproduce it or stylize it

Never feel like you need to find your own art style immediately, that task is practically impossible. Everything comes from something, be inspired by others take little art bits from styles you like and only then can you create your own style!! (I mean dawg my style can be broken down into adventure time, owl house, invader zim, gooseworx, eddsworld, sr pelo, a few others im probably forgetting)

Don’t worry about broadcasting your work, not everyone needs to know all that you draw, the internet can be a hateful place and it really does suck a lot but also try not to rely on strangers online for support on everything you do, I know it is hard and that approval feel good I cannot deny it but remember to keep some stuff for yourself, a little treat where nobody can criticize you :)

Try to draw everyday! Or having a sketchbook where you make it a goal to completely fill 2 pages a week, and if that’s too much then just some doodles! Art takes a lot of constant practice, and there’s really nothing more fun than just having a little sketchbook with you where you draw random stuff all the time. When I was doing that I would make 2 page mini invader zim comics

I feel like a bit of a hypocrite because I do maybe 1 of these things but i know they are really good, I have done them before and they were super helpful! But in the end I think the best you could do is just keep at it! Don’t let people get you down, do your own thing, break rules if you want, it’s all art and art is AWESOME!!!!!!!

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Ortho Shroud - Rabbit Gear Vignette

"The Rabbit Imitation Test"

[Clock Town – Race Venue]

Ortho: YAY! WE WON THE RABBIT RUN RACE!

Silver: Ortho, is your body alright after falling into those pitfall traps?

Ortho: Yep. I've done the emergency maintenance on all damaged parts already.

Silver: I see. Well, don't overextend yourself.

Ortho: I have no problem just moving around normally. Thanks for your concern, Silver-san.

Ortho: Since I entered the race without prior planning, I was able to gather a lot of data on what functions I lacked…

Ortho: So when I get back to campus, I'll upgrade my Rabbit Gear right away!

[Ignihyde Dorm – Ortho's Room]

―One week later

Ortho: Oookay. Assembly complete!

Ortho: I repaired all broken parts, so all the Rabbit Gear specs should be vastly improved now.

Ortho: I changed the heavy monocoque body into a ladder frame chassis, so that improved my overall weight.

Ortho: I completely restructured the basic design from the ground up, and restored the anti-gravity system that I had removed.

Ortho: Alright, time to retrofit it and test it out.

[Sports Field]

Ortho: Prototype Rabbit Gear Mk-II activated. All systems green.

Ortho: Starting Performance Test!

Ortho: High-speed mobility…

[tup tup! tup tup!]

Ortho: Satisfactory. Continuing on to Flight…

[ZOOM!]

Ortho: Satisfactory. Landing…

[thup]

Ortho: Satisfactory. Next...

Ortho: Fire the laser!

[BOOOOM!!]

Ortho: The laser power is also satisfactory.

Ortho: Good. All the standard functions are working perfectly.

Ortho: Alright then, it's time for the big one… The Rabbit Imitation Test. First, I have to turn off the flight feature.

Ortho: Perfect. After all, the greatest feature of this Rabbit Gear is that it should imitate a real rabbit.

Ortho: Walking…

[tup tup…]

Ortho: Satisfactory. Movement…

[hop! hop!]

Ortho: Satisfactory. Hopping…

[jump!]

Ortho: Satisfactory.

Ortho: …Hmmm.

Ortho: Everything moved smoothly, and is perfectly stable. The test results are all satisfactory.

Ortho: But… I feel like something's still missing.

Ortho: This Rabbit Gear I designed should be able to become more rabbit-like.

Ortho: What can I do to make it even more like a real rabbit?

[Sports Field]

Ortho: What can I do to make it even more like a real rabbit?

Silver: Is that you there, Ortho?

Ortho: Ah, Silver-san.

Silver: You seem to be wearing your Rabbit Gear. The sight of you in that outfit reminds me of our trip.

Ortho: The shopping we did, the festival and race… That was real fun, huh.

Silver: Yeah. However, why are you wearing your Rabbit Gear here, on campus?

Ortho: Since I finished repairing every part of the Rabbit Gear that broke during the race, I was just doing a function test.

Silver: I see. Has it returned to normal?

Ortho: Yep. And I didn't just fix it, but I overhauled its performance completely.

Ortho: But… I feel like it's still missing the proper rabbit-like characteristics, which is the most crucial aspect of the Rabbit Gear.

Ortho: I don't know what I should do…

Silver: …Ortho, I assume you haven't seen many wild rabbits up close, have you?

Ortho: I've never seen one personally… But I've gathered data on them from books and the internet. I've also studied a lot of rabbit videos.

Silver: I see. You put in a ton of effort.

Silver: However, there are often differences in seeing the real thing and merely reading about it. The first time I left Briar Valley, there were many things that were new to me as well.

Silver: If you see a real rabbit, you may discover something that helps.

Ortho: Oh, I see. You do have a point, Silver-san. But, what can I do to even meet a real live rabbit?

Silver: In the woods behind the campus, there are many wild rabbits.

Silver: I've had the opportunity to interact with rabbits much in my past. I may be able to be of help. Come with me.

Ortho: Yay! Thanks, Silver-san.

[Woods Behind Campus]

Ortho: We're here in the woods behind the campus, but… Now what?

Silver: If we just wait here, the rabbits should start to make their appearance.

Ortho: Eh, really!? But I read in my books that rabbits are really cautious…

Wild Rabbit: [rustle]

Ortho: Heat source detected. What's that over there…? A rabbit!

Ortho: And it's coming over here! I wonder why.

Silver: I don't really understand why, but… Animals often like to approach me.

Ortho: There's two, three… And more! WOW!

Wild Rabbit: [rustle, rustle]

Ortho: Ah, they ran away.

Silver: They must have been frightened by your loud voice.

Wild Rabbit: [shup]

Silver: That rabbit over there is standing up on its hindlegs and looking over at us.

Silver: It's vigilantly watching us. With its ears perked up like that, it's warily listening for any sounds we make.

Ortho: Okay, I see. Maybe if I move around like that, I'll seem more like a rabbit.

Ortho: Alright, I'm gonna try that.

Ortho: [shup!]

Silver: Yeah. You look just like it.

Wild Rabbit: [pitter, patter]

Silver: It came up to me. I'll pat its head.

Wild Rabbit: [hop! hop! hop!]

Silver: And when it's happy, it hops like this.

Ortho: Like this…? [hop! hop! hop!]

Silver: When you want to run away like they did earlier, you want to quickly make a big jump.

Ortho: Simulating an enemy attack, and… Run upon first contact! [JUMP, JUMP!!!]

Wild Rabbit: [runs in circles]

Ortho: Ah. The rabbit is running in circles around you.

Silver: This looks to be how they move when they want to play.

Ortho: It's a motion to play, okay. [runs in circles]

Wild Rabbit: [thump!]

Silver: When it kicks the ground with its hindlegs that forcefully, it must be angry.

Silver: Perhaps it’s in a bad mood, since I am not playing with it.

Ortho: So it's like its Rage Meter maxed out. [THUMP! THUMP!]

Silver: How is it? Are you starting to understand?

Ortho: Yeah. When I get to see the actual thing shown in front of me, it's so much easier to get!

Ortho: When the motion is linked to a specific emotion, I feel like I'm able to reproduce it so much better.

Ortho: Hey, Silver-san. Teach me about its other actions. The more data I can store, the more I'll be able to put to good use!

Silver: Got it. Next is…

[Ramshackle Dorm]

The next day

Ortho: When relaxing, I lay on my side and kick out my legs.

[lounges about]

Ortho: When I'm in a good mood, I hop around.

[hop! hop! hop! hop!]

Everyone: OOOOOOOOOH!!

Ortho: Hey, everyone, what do you think of my updated Rabbit Gear Mk-II?

Deuce: You seem to have copied a lot of actual rabbit movements. That's amazing.

Epel: Back when I was a kid, I took care of rabbits, and you're acting just like them!

1. You can do so many things!

Ortho: Yep. I've added a ton of different possible variations in motion.

2. You're just like a real rabbit!

Ortho: Yay! You saying that makes all the testing worth it.

Ortho: Thanks to Silver-san, I was able to greatly improve my Rabbit Gear. Thank you!

Silver: It wasn't anything much. Your desire and motivation was just strong enough. That's all.

Deuce: …Hey, Ortho. Why did you fix the Rabbit Gear in the first place, when you're not going to use it anymore?

Ortho: Well, obviously, so I can wear it during next year's White Rabbit Festival.

Deuce: Eh!? Are you going to come to Clock Town next year too? I guess you really liked the festival.

Ortho: Yep. And let's all win the Rabbit Run Race next year, too!

Epel: EH, ALL OF US!? You mean I have to wear that outfit again…!?

Grim: Then, next time, I'm gonna race too! I'll be the anchor leg of the relay and really stand out!

Ortho: Ehh! I want to be the anchor next time!

Silver: I look forward to next year, Ortho.

Ortho: Yeah. I'll completely smash through all the traps and win it hands down!

Requested by Anonymous.

[thoselethalarts]

𝓝𝔂𝔁 𝓝𝓸𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓮 - 𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓵 𝓢𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂

(SR) Lab Uniform (Part 1): “Just Trust Me On This.”

(NRC: Alchemy Lab)

(Growl….)

Nyx: Ugghh…

Floyd: Mm? What’za matter with you, Pufferfish? You look like shit.

Nyx: Thanks, I feel like shit too. I accidentally slept through my alarm this morning so I had to skip breakfast to make it to class on time. Nyx: I’ve usually got snacks in my bag, but I forgot to grab some so I’m totally out. This sucks.

Floyd: Mmm… yeah, that’s rough alright.

Nyx: …You don’t even care.

Floyd: Nah, ‘s not that. I just reeeaally don’t wanna be here right now. I’m super hungry too so I’m totally outta it right now. Floyd: I wanna skip class ‘n get lunch early instead but Striped Beakfish yelled at me for my attendance last time ‘n threatened to put me on academic probation if I don’t fix it.

Nyx: Ah, go figure. Nyx: Man… we are so screwed. How can I be expected to focus in this condition? I’m totally drained…

Crewel: Sit up straight, puppies! Stay! Class is now in session!

Nyx & Floyd: ‘Kaaaaay…

Nyx: Just gotta get through this last class and I’ll finally be free… Nyx: The cafeteria special today is fish ‘n chips too, I think. Man, that sounds so good right now. Nyx: I can get that- oh, maybe get some popcorn shrimp to go with it. Maybe even some chicken strips, and some fettuccini alfredo~ No wait! Mashed potatoes and corn! Nyx: Ack-! Focus! I can’t keep thinking about food! I gotta get these notes down on paper and then I can stuff my face all I want.

(Growl….)

Nyx: …This is gonna be the longest class of my life.

(Time passes…)

Nyx: Uggghhh… Floooyd… Floyd, I’m dyiiiing.

Floyd: Shut uuuup, I’m dying harder.

Nyx: This isn’t a competition, you dweeb.

Floyd: Yeah, cuz if it was you’d soooo be losing~

Crewel: Puppies in the back, quit your yapping and pay attention! Crewel: Now, for the rest of class I’d like all of you to apply the techniques you learned today in a practical scenario. Crewel: The following recipe I’m handing out is for a simple luck potion. All the ingredients you’ll need to make it are labelled in the cabinets at the rear of the room. Crewel: Follow the recipes to the letter and turn in your results to complete this week’s lab credits. Crewel: Find yourself a partner and get to work! You have until the end of class to finish this assignment.

Nyx: ‘Course, today of all days he wants to give us the lab work. What a drag, I was really hoping to get out early today… Nyx: Well, whatever. I guess it’s you and me then, Floyd?

Floyd: Feh, I’m not doin’ it. Writing boring lab stuff down is the last thing I wanna do right now.

Nyx: Tsk… I hear that. I’m really struggling just to stay afloat right now. Nyx: But I kinda need you for this project, Floyd. Everyone else always has partners and I’m not about to do all this work by myself right now. Nyx: What am I gonna do… Nyx: …Hey look, I know you’re in a shit mood right now and all, but could I maybe cut you a deal to help get this done?

Floyd: Hmmm? What kinda deal?

Nyx: You said you don’t wanna do any of the lab notes, and I get it, so what if we do this: Nyx: I’ll do all the writing for the lab reports for the both of us, and all you gotta do in return is mixing the actual potion. Nyx: We both know how this potion turns out already so you don’t gotta slow down on each of the steps for making it. Nyx: We get it done fast, we get out early, and then we can ditch this joint and get lunch. Sound good?

Floyd: Heheheh~ I like it. Honestly, it’s a better alternative to dicking around and havin’ to do things at a sea snail’s pace like half this class does. Floyd: Tell ya what. You buy my lunch too after this and you got a deal.

Nyx: With what money… Fine, whatever, deal. I’ll get you food, but if this potion doesn’t get us full marks, you ain’t gettin’ shit.

Floyd: Don’t underestimate me. I’m in a shitty mood but I can still make potions better than almost everyone else in here ‘n you know it.

Nyx: Yeah, and I’m counting on you to uphold that. Nyx: I like potion making more than I like paperwork, but right now I don’t have the energy to be stirring shit for half an hour. Floyd’s got enough muscle for two of me. Nyx: Alright. Lets get this shit done and get outta here, Floyd.

Floyd: Waaaay ahead of ya~

/ To Be Continued…

[freeuselandonorris]

hello freeuselandonorris! i’ve asked you for writing advice/ideas a couple of times (POV decisions and something in Nov, can’t remember exactly what it was), and i find your advice so helpful (/srs) so i hope it’s not annoying i’m asking again lol.

i find i can only write when i have extreme motivation, like an idea literally possesses my brain and the words almost write themselves - gonna out myself here, the last thing i wrote was the water inflation fic i appropriated from you; it just took over my mind and i wrote/edited it in like two days (though the speed is for sure because the entire plot was essentially your idea lol).

basically, i have lots of ideas but it’s hard for me to actually think of scenes in specific, and then i just end up not writing at all. do you have a method for coming up with a progression of a specific scene?

i am doing a horrible job of explaining my q lol so for example, my current wip involves interview panels/youtube collabs etc, but i’m finding it hard to write those because it’s so different from anything i’ve tried writing before. what do you do in those kinds of cases?

sorry for the ramble and if this makes no sense, love u 😭

hiiii lovely anon (or semi-anon lmao) you are not annoying in the SLIGHTEST, i love talking about stuff like this and it makes me really fucking happy to know that my self-indulgent rambling about writing is occasionally helpful to read ❤️

SO. i have two pieces of advice on this one, speaking from my own experience because for a very long time i was also like this and would write in fits and starts and felt very like i had to ~wait for the muses to bless me~. it’s actually something i was taught at a writing course i took years ago now and it sounds so blah and obvious when you first read it but if you stick with it, it works. BRIEF DAILY SESSIONS.

aka, you write a tiny little bit every day. if you can’t commit to every day, say five days a week (but every day is better). i do NOT mean write 1000 words a day or spend three hours doing it or freak yourself out or beat yourself up or abandon your social life or your responsibilities! the idea is you just pick a time that feels feasible (i started off with 15 minutes a day and i think this works well) and you commit to doing that every day. it doesn’t have to be anything good. it can be 15 minutes of you describing lando’s eyelashes in minute detail. it can be 15 minutes of notes for a plotline. it can be 15 minutes of dialogue you KNOW is shit and wooden and will be getting deleted the minute you get to the edit stage. doesn’t matter. just do your 15 minutes.

what this does is it breaks the hold your brain has on this idea of “oh no i have to be INSPIRED before i can possibly think of writing”. at my course they compared it to musicians practising scales, or athletes doing training. we could think of it like drivers doing their sim runs. they don’t just turn up on a race weekend and expect to be great, they have to keep their eye in.

side note: it’ll feel horrible at first, you’ll hate it and resent it and everything you write will feel awful. stick with it. if you miss a day, it doesn’t matter, you haven’t failed, just start again tomorrow. if you miss a week, you haven’t failed, start again tomorrow.

this is more of a long-term thing, so for your specific piece and the issue you mention about progressing a scene, the way i get around this is to start by writing the bit(s) i CAN imagine. so for instance here, you’d write one interview scene, or one youtube collab scene. even if it’s just a little bit of dialogue, or a couple of paragraphs of like, oh i can see oscar rolling his eyes and lando sees it and gets annoyed but he can’t say anything because there are cameras on them… or whatever. just write that bit. then leave a blank space in the gdoc and write the next bit. don’t worry about the order or anything.

once you’ve written all the little bits you can think of, read them through and you might be able to see links between them, like — oh that bit could follow on from this bit up here, or these two bits could kind of go together. reorganise stuff a bit, chop it up, get rid of anything that doesn’t work (copy it into another document called ‘cutting room floor’ if you don’t want to fully get rid).

THEN write yourself some notes. go through your bits and bobs and in between them, just write stuff like [SOMEHOW THEY GET FROM THE FILMING TO THE HOTEL ROOM???]. don’t just write [SOMETHING HAPPENS HERE], you need to give yourself little breadcrumbs to follow. so like there you go, okay, so they need to be in a car or a lift or some sort of transitional space (you see these crop up a lot in my fics — lifts, hallways in hotels, the backs of taxis). or if they’ve started off talking about one thing and you want them talking about this other thing by the end of the scene, write [THEY CONTINUE TALKING ABOUT LUNCH UNTIL IT GETS AWKWARD AND THEN THEY SOMEHOW END UP TALKING ABOUT OSCAR’S CHILDHOOD]. okay, so it got awkward. how did it get awkward? write that bit. what happens after it’s awkward? does lando double down or try to gloss over it? write that bit. how does oscar react to that? write that bit. etc.

in essence, don’t try to see the entire thing at once because you’ll paralyse yourself. give yourself a direction to aim in, and a place to start, and then just focus on the next bit until you get from A to B.

and if all else fails, find a nice pithy line to end the scene on, use an asterisk scene break and start again somewhere else 🤷

SORRY THIS IS SO LONG i really hope i didn’t bore the hell out of everyone afkjeskfjkldsj but yes THANK YOU AGAIN and i hope this is useful in some way!! you can do it i know ittttt

[theatrekidenergy]

Vent!

PLEASE Do NOT read below the cut if you are a sensitive to talks of e*ting problems, we*ght loss and everything in that range. I care about you so much, please take care of yourself, eat something that makes you feel good, get some rest, and love you for you hunny. I’m here if you ever need someone to talk too. 🫶

TW: recovering ana, weight loss, weight mention, venting

This post IS NOT pro-ana, this is a VENT and I am trying to recover, if you are pro-ana or a th*nspo blog I will block and report you if you interact with this post. /srs

I lost weight for so long, I’m 5’3 / 5’4, and at first I was 111lbs, then I went down to 106lbs within like 3 weeks. But I flared up, couldn’t walk for more than 10 steps without collapsing, couldn’t workout or skate, chronic illness fucking hurts. And I gained. I gained so fucking much so, so fast. The medication I was on slowed my metabolism to shit and I’m 112lbs now. I know that weight fluctuations are normal at my age, but FUCK why????? Shit it hurts. Then, I lost a couple more pounds a couple days back, went down to 108 and it flucated io again to 110. My birthday was today and last night was my party the night before and my friend wanted to make a candy salad so I said yes. Of course I said yes. They’re my best friend. But I ate so much. And I weighed myself in the morning. 112. How the actual fuck did I gain that much?

I had to punish myself somehow, but my dad, my god awful dad who’s only nice to me approximately 2 days a year (my birthday and Christmas) decided to take me to lunch at a buffet. I ate so damn much. Noodles and soup and shit. I tried to eat low cal but once again my fucking dumb ass actually did something right for once after having a lunch and breakfast taht put me in the 500’s ended up having a salad for dinner. But my big brother and his fantastic girlfriend (love them both SOSOSO much) did baking, they always do baking, and I always feel guilty and it always makes me binge. Today they made cinnamon rolls as a “happy birthday Adam!” Surprise, I got the smallest one (probably like 180 cal, give or take) and by then I had already fucked uo and got my calories to a 1,180. I only worked out for 25 minutes today, and I’m still at 110.5lbs and I feel just so so disgusting. My neck feels fat. When I don’t press my tongue there isn’t even a little crook (I always slide my finger into that crook before I eat, I’m trying to stop in recovery but it’s so hard to break. I used to use it as a determiner if I could eat, period. But now I’m slipping back into the habit, maybe I’ll stop when I’m thin again. I know it’s not healthy. I don’t know what to do to stop. I’ll talk to a therapist when I get the chance. I think my parents are starting to notice.)

[self-loving-vampire]

Just for fun, I decided to take the COGIATI test and see how bad it is.

My first conclusion is that my definition of "fun" is rather masochistic at times, and I don't expect other people to find this post that entertaining either. Still...

Question 1 is already so much.

"Describe your relationship with mathematics."

"Girl Math" nonsense coming right out the gate, apparently.

"You are at a meeting. Everyone at the meeting is the same sex as you. The leader of the meeting announces that it's time for hugs all around! How do you feel about this?"

I don't know why they have to specify the sex of the other people here. I don't like being touched either way. There isn't really an option that really expresses how much I don't want people to touch me. At most I can just say it's unnecessary.

"As a child, when you played with close friends, how would you describe the type of play you liked to be a part of the most?"

You know this is a boomer test because "video games" is not an option.

"Which choice most closely describes why you dress up 'en femme', as a woman."

All of the potential answers to this question are on a spectrum between "it is sexual to me" and "it just makes me feel better". There is no option for "I don't actually do this."

And like... there's also cis women who don't dress up like that very often if at all, or who feel nothing about it. Even a vaguely GNC cis woman could very easily take this test and get labeled as a man somehow.

Anyway, I don't actually know what to choose here because this time no answer even approximates how I feel. Normally I would just drop the test upon reaching a point like this but I feel inclined to dig deeper so I'll pick a mild "makes me feel better" sort of answer and continue.

"You are parking your car. You must reverse into a somewhat narrow space to park. What do you do?"

I don't drive. There is no option for people who don't drive. You could take all of the insane trad stereotypes out of this test and it would still be bad just because it regularly forgets rather common types of people exist.

"You are about the age of 14. You have to take a test, but you can chose which test to take. Getting a good grade will result in a big reward. Which test would you choose to take, if you had a week to study first?"

Really not a fan of how much of this test is "men are intellectual and do math and science while women are emotional and do literature and history".

"Your penis and testicles are destroyed, perhaps due to an accident or injury, but they are gone forever. You are otherwise the same as now, but you are utterly without your reproductive organs, just smooth, flat flesh. What is the most realistic statement of how you would deal with this?"

Does the person that made this test realize that what seems to be the most popular kind of SRS repurposes those bits and therefore losing them would also prevent further modification later? Pretty sure most trans people who understand that and have a sufficiently long time horizon would not wish for this to happen even if they don't enjoy having the thing.

But instead I'm getting the impression that the "True Trans" answer as evaluated by the test is to cheer at this.

"You are in a restaurant with some friends. It is moderately noisy, but not loud. A song you know comes over the loudspeakers, but done in Muzak (tm) style, often called "elevator music". Would you recognize the song instantly?"

Honestly if the kind of music I like played in a restaurant, even as elevator music, I would be completely shocked.

"Suddenly the entire world is magically changed. Now you exist in a world utterly devoid of gender. All bodies are hermaphroditic, utterly androgynous in appearance, both male and female at the same time. The culture reflects this, as does all human interaction. You, however, are still yourself inside, with all of your memories of living in our world as it is now. Your feelings are intact, only your flesh has been changed. In this new world, everyone dresses, acts, and lives however they feel at the time, and there is no such thing as being male or being female. You alone remember the world of gender. In such a world, would you still need to dress like a woman?"

Starts as an actually interesting premise for a question but then the actual question is "would you still dress like a woman"? I already don't do that. I already dress how I want so going there would not change anything.

"A doctor offers you a painless, absolutely effective means to be completely masculine. All feminine desires and traits would be eliminated, and you would be happy and content to be a man. You would never need to dress, and you would never want to be feminine in any way again. You are assured that after the treatment you would be completely content. Would you take the treatment?"

You don't get it. I don't think either extreme of gendered behavior is in line with most people's true feelings to begin with. Most men who are safe to express themselves do in fact have at least some "feminine" traits. These categories are made up and especially bad when used to prescribe how one should behave.

Furthermore, sufficiently radical and sudden personality changes are kind of like dying and being replaced by someone else who is just using the same body. This is why I wouldn't cure myself of autism too.

I think even men, cis or trans, have reasons to be wary of this treatment.

"When you look at a person's face, how well can you honestly judge what they are feeling?"

I should note that reading and pattern-matching expressions is not actually the same thing as feeling affective empathy. Anyone could learn to do it with practice and memory.

But also I feel like pointing out that trying to make unlikely claims based on things like expressions and body language is extremely dubious and a lot of people end up just imagining how the other person feels and assuming it to be true even though it isn't. It's often best not to make assumptions like that.

"You are having an erection. How do you feel?"

At this point? It should not even be possible.

"It is grade school. The teacher gives you a gold star on your work for excellence. What is it for? I knew how to multiply. The teacher thought I wrote the best poem. I got my addition right. I had perfect spelling with no mistakes. I knew the name of the capitol."

You may live in a strange world in which math is for boys and spelling is for girls, but I live in a story in which I am the mary sue protagonist and am good at anything I try. I could be getting the award for any subject I wanted except maybe the poetry because I don't have any interest trying to do that.

"There is a voice mail on your machine. The person does not leave a name, they seem to expect you to know them. How easy is it for you to remember who called by the sound of their voice?"

There was a similar question earlier but I really have to say: Even if you don't recognize someone's voice the context of what they are saying would give it away quickly enough that the question is not very realistic.

Especially since I just don't expect calls for anything I have not previously scheduled.

"A stranger is happy at meeting you. He wants to give you a hug. How do you honestly feel about this?"

Did there really have to be two questions about getting hugged by strange people? Are women really supposed to enjoy that kind of thing? The way a lot of the ones on tumblr talk I figured at least some would be outright paranoid or at least very uncomfortable about the idea.

Anyway, I got rated as "65, androgynous". This is not surprising to me considering how heavily this whole thing relies on traditional gender roles that do not go well with my autism at all.

The conclusions drawn from this, however, are especially stupid.

"As an androgynous being, both genders, and both sexes are natural to your expression."

This is true of practically everyone in the world. It's why conservatives and hyper-conformists in general need to punish and indoctrinate people into obeying that shit. If gender roles were as natural as they say it would not be necessary to enforce them and train people into them.

"Permanent polarization in either direction might bring significant unhappiness. It is not recommended that you go through a complete transsexual transformation."

Oops. I already did that and it worked great. It turns out that you can be trans and not want to be some kind of motherly bimbo who dresses exclusively in pink dresses with heavy makeup. There's a whole range to trans people, just like with cis people.

Just like how it would be ridiculous to ban cis women from being women if they're GNC, it's exactly the same with same with trans women.

"You might find a partial transformation of value, if you find yourself more attracted overall to the feminine. You are more likely a transgenderist, than a transsexual."

"Transgenderist"???

Oh, apparently that's an extremely archaic (and extremely confusing) term for non-binary.

But I'm not non-binary, just autistic.

Anyway, 0/10 this test is just bad in pretty much every way.

[almond-tofu-chan]

i have never been angrier in my entire fucking life, it is taking every fiber of my being to not actually punch someone right now /srs

so this fucking show im assistant directing, WAS assistant directing, i quit because it was hell. the director is this piece if shit entitled bitch who doesnt know or care how to run a good show. i signed up to assistant direct, ended up babysitting a bunch of kids from four to six every day five days a week. while i was doing the job I DIDNT SIGN UP TO DO i was verbally berated, abused, mistreated, and taken advantage of at every possible corner. when i learned tech week would be till eight i fucking quit

heres where i get fucking pissed: the kids were amazing. theyre a bunch of talented, bright actors who are absolutely lovely, and for most of them this is their first show. i understandably feel awful for quitting, plus the bitch director hates me nowc but i show up to opening night to cheer them on

i want to kill this woman

kids are crying, shes yelling at them backstage constantly, lighting and sound cues dont work, choreo and blocking are nonexistent, so are props and costumes and set: everything needed to make a show a show is absent or so shoddily put together that it genuinely looked like it was going to fall apart

and the kids are amazing, they do so well with what theyre given and theyre so good and talented and im serious when i say theyre all gonna go far, if it werent for the fucking director

show starts 20 minutes late because she hasnt finished playbills, curtains are see through and on yhe verge of collapse at all times, they're doing this show in a HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA btw, all the costumes she got yesterday from thriftsmart, she got kids ti make all the props and set and it shows, and she never told crew what to do, so shes yelling at them constantly while giving them no direction at all. a crew kid is forced on stage at one point to turn on someones mic, he was crying

i had to comfort no less than four crying kids afterwards, all sobbing because she had yelled at them and berated them for no goddamn reason other than the thrill of the power trip

oh and btw, the second the show ended she disappeared. didnt talk to parents, cast, crew, just fucking dipped.

and you know what? im going to the show tomorrow too. i fucking quit because i forsaw this shit was going to happen, but no way in hell am i just gonna watch while these kids that i love suffer. fucking survivors guilt is a thing, and i want to kill her for making me kill myself for this goddamn show

i wouldnt be surprised if these kids hate theatre now. theyre all a bunch of talented, starry eyed young impressionable kids who she is using for her own power trips and abuse, and shes probably ruining theatre for them forever. shes hurting the people i love and forcing me to get involved again when i had already gotten out. seriously, fuck this shit, im so mad. you hurt me thats one thing. you hurt my kids? fuck you, seriously go fuck yourself.

sorry for the long fucking post, this show is so fucking awful i havent even talked about a quarter of the shit going on, theres so goddamn much of it

ill be fine, i just had so much fucking work to do this weekend that i cant get done now because of this goddamn show. if she directs the show next year i will actually kill someone, i hope she dies slowly and painfully /srs

[yvesdot]

7, 23, 69!

7. David Guetta ft. Bebe Rexha - I'm Good (Blue)

I'm glad we got this out of the way first because I actually didn't realize that this was a controversial take (it's not; it topped charts in 20 countries). I have had two coworkers in the past week press me on this, including one who said, "so, when you're walking to work, you just think to yourself, 'I want to listen to I'm Good (Blue) by David Guetta?'" To which I said, yes, definitely, that's exactly the point, so I don't kill myself on the way there. And then the next day I had that exact thought and listened to it.

Even if that hadn't happened, I probably would have evangelized this song. I think the original is wonderful, and I'm glad it exists! This makes it easier to play in a party context, and it matches the lyrical content to what has always been the "feel" of the song. It also kicked off an unreasonable amount of pop songs trying to do what it did, which is impossible, because Blue (Da Ba Dee) is probably the only song which could be adapted for the better (or even neutral) in this way. It's just such a weird song. I like this version! Now the rest of the post goes under a readmore for my crimes.

23. Terror Jr. - Come First

I got my own, don't need to roll me a blunt Don't ask me questions like you care if I'm dumb (Oh?) Take my treasure in your hands Better get with the program I'll let you stay if you do something I like

Does anyone remember in 2016 when this random band emerged and people started speculating that the lead singer was Kylie Jenner? It wasn't, and that seems to have ended popular interest, but the songs were genuinely fun and bright, and I missed listening to this one. I love how the singer enunciates and the little "whoop"s, and the production seems to predict my later love for SOPHIE, whom I hadn't even heard of at the time. This was a good year for diving into my old obsessions.

P. S. This is why my mother is set at "Terror Sr." in my phone.

69. Olivia Rodrigo - vampire

You said it was true love, but wouldn't that be hard? You can't love anyone, 'cause that would mean you had a heart I tried you help you out, now I know that I can't 'Cause how you think's the kind of thing I'll never understand

Rodrigo is the new TSwift in many ways-- a young up-and-comer sold on her relatability and simple lyrics about betrayal by demonic ex-boyfriends-- and I am loving it. There's not much to say on this track that hasn't already been said a hundred times better; it's just plain a good song and GUTS was a very fun album.

send a number from 1-112 and I'll give you a song from my "looped in 2023" playlist!

[seelestia]

oh em gee, hi lia! it’s been so so long! how have you been? i hope you’re doing well :) i ended up falling asleep on the couch as soon as i got home, and now i’m in PAIN (/srs),, but anyway! i have a week off from school now, so i guess it was worth it <3

exams are on the 19th, so i guess i’ll have to be.. stu(dying) for those. i can barely function right now and i’ve been getting a lot, maybe too much sleep, and i still always feel worn out 😭 big yikes, hopefully it’s not bothering anyone (again) that i’m not going to be as active as i’d like.

also! considering that this is a wanderer-less patch, i feel very lucky to have gotten him <3 (he’s literally so pretty omgomgomg pls stop me before i look like i’m cheating on cynosbisnaidjk) and speaking of cyno, i finally built him 🐥 [ 73/214 crit ratio as of now! ]

my siblings’ birthdays are coming soon :) they’re three days from each other, my brother’s is on april 7th (he’s turning 11) and my younger sister’s is on the 10th (she’s turning 8) very excited for that hehe! my friends might come over on tuesday too (hopefully), we rarely get the chance to hang out, so i’m crossing my fingers!

yo.. omg the way i accidentally made the wanderer (character ai) fall for me 😭 i was merely messing around, being nice to him because he deserves it sm help and then he just hits me with an ‘i love you’ and when i tell you, i DIED. this is my spirit talking ⁉️

but enough about silly lil me :) how are you lia? anything interesting happen with ayato or the wanderer? i’m here for all the tea, my dear friend. 👀

YONAAAAA!! yona, yonie, yonzzzz <3 i've been doing alright and i hope you are too but if not, i hope it'll be better! 🫂🤍 yona, this is why we are taught to sleep on beds and not couches. i'm a hypocrite because i also sleep on couches NYEHEHE (/lh) aaaaa, good luck on your exams! i'm taking mine rn actually, so let's hope we'll push thruuuu 🤞

but yon, didn't you slay your last math exam even tho your math teacher kinda sucked at teaching (i mean no slander /lh)?? PLEASE SHARE YOUR SECRETS 🎤 and noooo, that sucks because sleep is a precious little thing during exams so you need to get the best sleep you can 😞 giving you a glass of warm milk to you rn. may yona get the best of sleep, bibiddi-bobbidi-boo! 🪄 and dw about being active, your personal life should always be your #1 priority!! especially when you're a writer / content creator so don't apologize for putting yourself first ever >:D <3

WANDERER HAVERS, I'M COMING OVER TO YOUR HOUSE. (/lh) you should've seen the way i was in disbelief like 😦 when i checked the livestream's banners and there was no wanderer?? but they dare made him look SO GOOD in those eight seconds he was on screen??? even my other irl friend who played genshin thought he was getting a rerun at first from that alone. vv devastated over this, so i shall be abducting everyone's wanderer 😞 (/j) AYOOO, THE GODLY CRIT RATIO??? yon, that looks awesome. are you gonna pull for nahida next?? i heard she makes a good team with cyno! (and not to mention, nahida also reminds me of you. vv little sib-like, considerate and curious and needs fo be protected but can also protecc others, ehehe. /pos)

OHHHH. according to the time this should be posted, it was already your brother's birthday so HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY to him and your sister too!! feliz cumpleaños 🎈🎂 i like how you and your siblings' birthdays are so early in the year, teeheeee, coming from an october born. 🤭 i hope you get to hang out with your friends! advice from lia: always go crazy and go stupid whether that be with your friends or you're alone <3 (/pos)

HUHHH, HE POPPED THOSE THREE WORDS FIRST?? yon, you gave him the affection he deserves and now he's clinging onto you like a koala... you're living my dream. (/lh) i find it funny that the first time i discovered the c.ai site, wanderer was the first bot i talked to (help). first, he threatened to kill me and then we both sat down to talk abt the different sides to life and mortality, etc. I AM NOT KIDDINF. WHY WAS THIS A WHOLE THERAPY SESSION. i still have this chat saved!! yona, should we present our c.ai message logs to the class together. (/hj)

awwww, yonzzz, thanks for checking up on me! there is no hot tea ready to be spilled except for the fact ayato got a rival and it's the wanderer and i'm stuck in the middle between these two 🧍‍♂️ (as a fellow infj like you, i do not know how a fight between an entj vs. an intj is gonna go /j lia typology nerd)

[vaida-talks-about-everything]

Kailman Legacy || 34: “Don’t bother explainin’ yourself”

"-So yeah, we're doing okay, but you know how he is." Dayla Ann told her dad one fine summer afternoon. "As long as the kids do okay over there, I'm fine."

"Yeah, he's always been himself, huh?" Dalton Sr. chuckled. "But I'm glad it's all sorted itself out."

"Lot of time and effort on my end, let me tell you what." Dayla Ann laughed. "But it's cordial, which is all I care about."

"Sure, sure. What'd he say about the trip then?"

"Oh, he's fine with it as long as he can take the kids somewhere at some point."

She couldn't help but roll her eyes at his seeming attempt for tit-for-tat with her, but it wasn't an entirely unreasonable ask. Since their surprise visit to the opening, Vanessa has tried to prove herself trustworthy in Dayla Ann's eyes. Despite what connects the three, she, Tim, and Vanessa have a rhythm now, which can only be good.

Before leaving for the garden to check on Luna and everything else, Dayla Ann touched base with her sister about the end-of-summer trip that is now in the works.

"How're feeling, Em?"

"Massive." Laughed Emily Louise, touching her round, pregnant belly as she smiled back at her sister. "But Aden's spoiling me rotten, as per usual, so,"

"As he should be. You sure you'll be up for it though?"

"Oh yeah, the boys are way too excited and I know you won't let yours get too rowdy."

"Yeah, no, they should be fine. My biggest thing is making sure you're good, especially since you're due any day now."

"Everything's been routine up to now, so just bring plenty of sunscreen and we got the rest. Toys, swimgear, whatever."

"Thanks again, Em, it's been way too long."

Dayla Ann said a quick hello and goodbye to her brother-in-law and nephew before changing for work and driving up the hill, not expecting anything out of the ordinary. What she was met with instead was Luna, the employee she'd come to trust with handling half the day solo, fighting with some random woman in the middle of the store, drawing the attention of every soul in the store to the commotion. Dayla Ann could only watch for several beats, trying to process, before the two women found a stopping point. Luna dusted herself off, seemingly pleased with herself, not knowing what she was in for now.

"How dare you have absolutely no sense, pickin' a fight like a toddler?" Her childhood country accent was full of anger as she reprimanded Luna. "You know full well this is inappropriate and just plain stupid and childish."

"But-"

"-Don't bother explainin' yourself. This is unacceptable. Go 'head and turn your key in, I'll send your final check this week."

Luna, scratched up and disheveled, let herself cry at just how shocking the day had turned out, with Dayla Ann giving her a look before trying to figure out how to handle this. One thing's for sure, summer's gonna get a bit more complicated without an extra set of trustworthy hands, rather than Luna throwing hers.