#genderfluid asks

[barbthebuilder]

hey, it's alright if you cant answer this because i understand!

I'm having trouble with what my gender identity is, I'm afab, and i have always thought i was cis until early 2024. in jan i experimented with being genderfluid, as i realised how much i loved presenting masc and how it made me feel so much better being masc.

shortly after that, i had a weird feeling constantly while presenting masc or fem, where if i was fem i would just feel cis, but if i presented masc i would feel like i'm still cis but just dressing up. my solution to this was to choose a different name to the very feminine one i was assigned, so i chose charlie, which in my head is a very feminine name but also very masculine, based on the people ive seen with that name.

i decided on the lable nonbinary for a bit. (maybe 3 months or so) but when i was using just they/them pronouns i felt like i was missing out on the other genders i wanted to be, so i used they/he/she for a bit, which was fine.

i realised soon after that nobody was using he/him for me, so i dropped it because it felt like a waste and just used they/she, which made me extremely dysphoric, so i went back to they/them.

im currently using they/them, nonbinary, and dressing masc daily, (not wearing any makeup to avoid any dysphoria at all) BUT im also a lesbian. ive been a lesbian for about 2 years and im certain that i am, but can i be enby and lesbian ??? or any other lable and lesbian because thats another thing thats been making me feel weird about my gender

i know this is pretty confusing so if you dont know then i get it, no worries!! i hope you have a nice day :D

Yo, gender identity stuff can be pretty confusing so I don't balme you for feeling uncertian about all of this.

The experience of feeling like you basically fake being genderfluid is something I have dealt with in the early days too. You have identified as a woman for a very long time. It's natural that there is a part if you that rejects nonbinary thinking. You're just not used to thinking about yourself in other ways.

That too shall pass. Feeling like you're faking is temporary if you sureound yourself with good support system and reprogram binary thinking. That happened to me at least.

I can totally relate to feeling like you miss out on something while using they/them. I am personally fine with those pronouns but I much rather be called she or he.

Now, I want you to notice something. You expressed that the best set of pronouns for you that you experimented with was she/they/he. You stuck with those, however people did not use he/him for you. I said: "it felt like a waste". A waste of what? I wonder if there are other feelings involved here too. It just bugs me that you have changed such a big part of yourself beacuse of how everybody was treating you. Maybe the pronouns are not the problem here but how others use them on you.

You seem to be very uncomfortable with she/they and not fully yourself with they/them. Seems like the masculine part of you is a very important one. I don't think it would be true to yourself to reject or supress it.

I think the problem with realising what your gender identity is will be connected to your desire to conform. Don't ask yourself "will they accept me?" but "will I accept me?".

For example, you seem to be very strongly connected to your lesbian label but here you are asking complete stranger if you can use it. Are you a lesbian? If you want to, then yes. Don't try to be what others perceive you to be. Just. Be.

I'm not sure if this was helpful lol. Let me know if you want to! I'm always open to the chatter. Sending lots of love!! <33

[demigods-posts]

no but imagine percy who inherited his mom's beachwave brown, shoulder length hair as a kid. and all of his classmates and teachers thinking he's a girl and referring to him as such. and he doesn't correct them because he thinks it means they find him pretty. and he likes feeling pretty like his mom. then gabe makes him cut his hair in the second grade. and finds he likes the short hair and feeling handsome too. but he also really misses feeling pretty sometimes. and it isn't until after gabe mysteriously dissapears that he grows it out again and reconciles switching between both.

[daily-dragon-drawing]

Hii! I absolutely love your pride dragons :) may I request a genderfluid dragon?

#117 - 性別流動 (xìngbié liúdòng / genderfluid) - Here he is! She's the gender fluid! 💗🤍💜🖤💙

[genderqueerdykes]

I've heard smoking can harm the effects of estrogen, does this apply to nicotine in general or just smoking?

thank you so much for asking this question, this is an extremely important matter to discuss! smoking while taking estrogen HRT is highly discouraged for 2 reasons.

the first is that smoking (nicotine) has been shown to completely neutralize and eliminate the effects of estradiol altogether:

nicotine reduces the amount of circulating estrogen one has in their system, which can lead to menopause in many individuals.

the second reason is that smoking nicotine can increase risk of life threatening clotting disorders like stroke, heart attack and pulmonary embolism:

many folks are not informed of the fact that estrogen hrt can cause increased risk for pulmonary embolism and heart complications- this is why it's vital to make sure you get testing done by a professional to make sure what levels will be safe for your body, or what complications you may face if you have blood clotting or heart issues.

i can't find too many studies that disseminate different types of tobacco usage (chew, vape, patches, etc.) but it does in fact seem like the nicotine itself, no matter how it's administered, greatly affects one's estrogen levels.

overall, i would say it would be best to completely quit using nicotine if you are planning going on estrogen HRT. not only will you see more of the effects you're looking for, but you'll feel better in general, and have a way reduced risk of stroke and heart attacks. there's little to no point in taking a medication that will become completely useless once administered. i had a problem with smoking cigarettes for a while and i wish you the best if you do, yourself.

i hope this information has been helpful, thanks for stopping by! good luck out there

[luffyadolover]

@acid-ixx here it is :))

(excluding first three drawings)

first drawing:

dick's excuse would always be "sorry, baby bird! but i promised to spar with damian today. ah, but you can watch from the sidelines!" or he would be too busy saving bludhaven to even acknowledge your presence.

second drawing:

you can't deny the bitterness and the clenching of your teeth whenever you stumble upon a room and see your father and your younger brother watching a movie together.

third drawing:

it was your teachers who would be the one having to walk you up the stage whenever you achieved an award. alfred would be too busy sometimes to attend your school ceremonies because he had to assist bruce with missions.

fourth drawing:

it's ironic, really, for a child to prep and plan for their own celebration just to hope that a single member of their family to even walk by the kitchen and join them in on their already lonesome celebration.

too bad everybody only goes to the kitchen when alfred cooks for them. who would want to taste sadness in a sloppily made birthday cake, right? nobody, not even you would have the appetite to eat your cake with the knowledge that it was you who had to put all the effort to bake it because you didn't want alfred to feel obligated to.

fifth drawing:

your family celebrates holidays together as a whole, but you never once attended after that one time where everybody had forgotten to get you a gift for christmas, save for alfred who gave you a bracelet (one that you cherished deeply).

sixth drawing:

the older sibling who he used to threaten with his sword, who he called vile names — a bastard child, he told you one day.

seventh drawing:

you weren't one of his friends, like kon who he would spend weekly video game challenges with; and you probably don't exist as his sibling in his own little world filled with coffee and computers.

eighth drawing:

casual talks are unavoidable, though, when at the dead of the night he would be caught sneaking in to eat some leftovers and you were conveniently awake at the same time as him. he'll recommend you some classic literature he read or 'cafes/restaurants that criminals visit the least' lists, but before it would turn into a full conversation, jason would already be wearing his signature mask again, and with a pat on your head and a "talk to you soon, can't guarantee it'll be tomorrow again though, only here for alfred's meals of course," and he'll be gone. you shouldn't have let your hopes high, you wished you didn't because, duh! he wasn't there to talk to you, specifically. you were just there to bide his time! wiping tears away from your eyes

[weekly-eons]

Genderfluid Umbreon?

Love to draw patterns

[boo-topia]

do you think that mugman cosplays as any popular video game princess, like Rosalina or Zelda? ^^

Idk if Ive ever mentioned how much mugman and Luigi have in common but I think mugman should dress up as princess peach so that’d give them one more shared experience

[idolomantises]

Do you have any trans characters? If so, who? :D /genq

(Also, love your comics!! My brother introduced me to them!)

oh you must be new here, I have a lot of trans characters, just off the top of my head.

Sorrel (trans man) and Viola (trans girl)

Mara (trans woman), Junior (trans woman) and Adam (trans man)

And that's only a small handful of examples. there's a lot more!

[xumoonhao]

pride web badges, version 2! / flag outline

version 1

[poll-boy]

Similar to the "at what age did you realize you were trans" I would like to see "in which year did you realize you were trans" :)

my guess is there’s going to be a lot of 2020-2024 because a LOT of people figured themselves out in quarantine, since for most people that’s really the only time they had /completely/ isolated from the world not worrying about what everyone else thinks. me included!

- if you want to submit a poll, you can on my blog! any and all suggestions are appreciated :)

especially if you have pride related suggestions for pride month!

[barbthebuilder]

Hello hope you're having a good day!

I just wanted some advice on understanding if I'm nonbinary or genderfluid. I like wearing short shorts and looking feminine from time to time. I like wearing makeup and I like my reflection but it doesn't really seem like me. I don't know if I'm making sense right now so I'm gonna try to explain it better.

I like girls and when I look in the mirror I see someone that I'd be attracted to but I'm just not sure that it's me. I like looking pretty but I don't like being pretty. I'm also really confused about it.

I don't like identifying as a girl but I like being “girly”. I love getting my nails done, I love putting on mascara before going out, I love being someone's girlfriend but I don't like being seen as a girl.

I hate it when someone addresses me as a girl but sometimes I don't really mind and I'm not sure if its because I've been in the closet for so long or its because I'm actually genderfluid.

If you have any advice on how I can figure it out and what you think it could be I’d be really happy to hear your thoughts.

Also, I want to thank you for your blog it really makes me feel better about my identity.

Love ❤️❤️

First of all, sorry for taking this long to respond!! I had so much going on lately and I wanted to give the best advice I could.

I think we will start with identifying that is gender expression and what's gender identity.

Gender expression is someting external. It's how you choose to display yourself, express how you feel. Things that can be considered part of gender expression: painting your nails, having specific hairdo, your name, your body language, pronouns you go by, the way you speak, your voice, your clothes, jewelry etc.

Gender identity is how you want to be preceived by yourself and others. It is who you are. It's more internal.

You described you like being girly (gender expression) but you don't like being called a girl (gender identity). It's important to understand that those two things can exist and don't contradict each other. You can be a feminine man or a masucilne woman. Nothing weird about that.

You said you don't know whether you're genderfluid or you're just used to being called a girl. I would recommend trying to get in touch with your internal self. What do you feel when people call you a girl? Would you rather be called differently? How would you like to be preceived? You can check that every day and see if it changes. I recommend writing it down somewhere. If you want to get specific with your emotions I recommend emotion wheel - it's a really good tool for naming and specifying what you experience.

If you're afraid your parents are going to find yozur graph and question it you can make it a code. Be clever.

Rememer, that labels are for you. They serve to make your life easier so don't let the concept of labels make it harder. If something feels right, go for it. You don't have to perfectly allign with other people's experiences and you probably won't. Ask yourself - what label makes me happy? What presentation feels right?

Also, if you want to go deeper with the "like looking pretty, hate being pretty" bit you can do this trick: write down what are the differences between those two concepts. Which of them is internal? Which of them has to do with how others preceive you? Which of them has to do with your identity?

That's all I can think of to say for now. If you have any doubts, feel free to dm me or send another ask :) good luck on your journey. May the gender euphoria be upon ya <33

[pokimoko]

hi!! if you'd be down i'd love to see an aromantic or genderfluid shark! any kind of shark but more specifically a thresher shark or leopard shark ^_^

*cradles shark gently* I just think they're neat.

[tanuki-kimono]

Seeing your post on gender-fluidity and kimono, I have a story! While I was in Kyoto for my honeymoon, my wife and I wore kimono - first time properly wearing it (I have a yukata that my neighbour gave me many years ago, but I just used it as a summer robe, no obi or anything). My wife is a trans woman, and we'd already told the rental company that ahead of time for sizing reasons - but when we got there, I was surprised when, after finding my wife's kimono, they turned to me and asked me which gendered style of kimono I wanted to wear! I didn't think the men's ones would suit me (I didn't realise otoko-poi was something that existed at the time) - but I do identify as genderqueer and my hair was/is too short to do anything fancy with, so, rather than doing up my hair with a nice hair ornament, I asked if I could wear one of the trilby hats that they normally paired with the men's kimono. We both looked amazing that day, and I'm so grateful they were willing to accommodate us!

Anon you have no idea how fuzzy that story makes me! I am so glad to hear a Japanese business story showing that Japan can get more and more accepting of LGBT+ spectrum, and that it is happening!

There is still a loooong way to go, but small steps and kind attentions like those make the world a better place <3

:D Thanks again for sharing your story :D

[I don't know if you are confortable sharing details, if so maybe you could recommend the business name?]

[genderqueerdykes]

is there anything that has happened since starting T that you didn't expect to happen? or that you feel you were not adequately informed about (by doctors, peers, etc), and that really should be more common knowledge?

that's such a great question, thank you for asking! that's a huge yes from me! here's what i experienced that i was definitely caught off guard by and not warned about that presented some challenges:

I was not told that because my body is changing, growing, and adjusting to a new balance in my endocrine system that i would be very exhausted for quite a while. i already have chronic fatigue but i basically struggled to get out of bed for about 2 weeks after starting T- i wasn't depressed, i was just exhausted. this is due to the fact that my muscles were becoming denser and rearranging themselves, my facial and body structure were changing, i was growing more hair, etc. that takes a lot of energy!

Similarly to the point above, no one told me that it would make you hungry as hell, and require you to eat a lot more. if you feel like you're "over eating" after just starting testosterone, you're probably not- your base caloric intake needs to increase because you are literally growing and changing, and also, high testosterone bodies tend to need more calories anyways

Body hair growth is ITCHY!!!! and sometimes even painful! growing hair in sensitive areas like your armpits, crotch and ass can be extremely uncomfortable if not painful at times. I've heard from even cis men who have told me that growing their ass hair was extremely painful and uncomfortable due to how that area is configured- if you find that hair growth is uncomfortable this is pretty normal, but always seek help if it becomes unbearable or you feel there are ingrown hairs. Also nose hair and ear hair become more of a thing, now

Testosterone will thicken your vocal cords and drop your voice, but you also have to teach yourself how to speak from your chest, or how to drop your voice to sit in a lower range naturally or else you will still sound pretty similar to your pre-transition voice, unless that is your goal. The effects are very strong, but many transmascs*, trans folk* etc. don't see as much change as they would if they also trained their voice at the same time while it's dropping

Your boobs will become flatter and sometimes smaller and a lot saggier. This is normal!

Whenever i re-start testosterone and when i started it for the first time, i had some pretty heavy menstrual periods for a while; sometimes your body reacts in the opposite way at first before totally stopping your periods altogether. it's almost like "rebound" symptom, if you know what that mean

Restless energy will very much become a thing, if you notice you're starting to get pissed off and can't place a finger on why you feel agitated and like you're going to explode, you might just need to do some physical activity for a while

that's all i could think of for now, but if i think of anything else, i'll be sure to add it to this post! thanks for asking, i hope this was informational! good luck out there in your journey!

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was coparenting a genderfluid demigod child with a bunch of friends, strangers, and also Chris Pratt. He kept acting like he was their real parent and deserved full custody despite not making any attempt to care for or understand them and they clearly disliked him.

[weekly-eons]

genderfluid eevee mayhaps ♡

all the genders