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#here ya go fuckers
ohkate · 1 year
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...it means we take care of each other.
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animelover20 · 9 months
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Me just laying in bed chilling the fuck out:
My brain: do you think doffy gets bad insomnia alongside his nightmares.
Me who's an insomniac that also has nightmares due to ptsd: *few seconds of thinking* he fucking would the poor bastard.. and it's not like anyone can convince him to sleep, what the fuck are they gonna do?
My brain: true..we should write about it.
Me: stop with the false motivation man you do this all the time.. not a bad thought.
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crow-with-a-pencil · 2 years
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Them theatre kids
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faunandfloraas · 8 months
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inadvertently stopped using my freckle fade cream without thinking.... right around the time i started making gifs of felix.... coincidence?
#positive influence.....#i do wonder sometimes how jarring it must have been for he and lil chris to go from australia to korea#bc i copped shit for being pale and freckly as a kid#i have a core memory of this girl talia wearing a country bumpkin costume with these cartoonish freckles drawn on and she pointed at me#and was like Lol im jessie haha and i was like Okay so you want to fight??#another time had to do some speech and when i finished and had questions from my classmates and two boys just asked me why i was pale#and why they could see idk i guess my bloodvessels in my legs ??? i didnt even notice like i was just like UHHHH idk ask about my topic#had so many instances like that and they werent terrible but it did make me insecure#like in the 00s here being tan was /it/ you had to be nice and tanned- go lay in the sun and ignore we are number one in melanoma deaths#like it was so consistently the thing... prob why i have so many freckles bc i didnt tan in the sun i freckled#but in both felix and chans aus photos they were quite tanned!#so imagine going from Hey go lay in the sun and get nice and brown ya pale fucker to Do Not Do That. Be pale as a ghost#white as fuck twilight vampire printer paper ass complexion or else you arent the beauty standard must have been so...... odd#idk beauty standards are so fucked and stupid#at least for me it was just like mean it wasnt like systemic. still wasnt nice but its not damaging the same way#but yeah I imagine some of the cultural differences must have been jarring and weird#like when chan said he was glad to get sex ed in australia bc it was comprehensive here and its not something i would have thought about#but yeah he went to school here and there he would know#idk must be hard to be an idol and straddle that line of not wanting to cause any ripples but having your own ideas and beliefs#oh i'd love to talk to him off the record lmao#dont take this as anti korea sentiment btw like australia is also wack#it just must be interseting and sometimes hard...#wow these tags are long SORRY
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conspiracy-ash · 1 month
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felt the need to post !!
but holy fuck send me to the grave
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chipjrwibignaturals · 9 months
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THOUGHT ABT CHIP JRWI INCIDENT 40 DEAD 32 WOUNDED
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#im so fucking far behind so I feel like I can’t rlly say shit#bc either its shit I’ve already said or abt events I haven’t witnessed myself#so I can’t like. give MY take im going off second hand info anyway#idk I just. I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!#he’s so selfish and selfless and all he really wants is to protect and love#forever some part of him is stuck as that little boy on the black rose#whether it’s in his desire for family and crew or even just his… simple urge to do good for goods sake that children have#before hard reality and Reuben and the streets told him to keep to himself and only care abt him and his#idk I just!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ya#it took gillion beating the shit out of him for that selfish shell to break#for him to realize like. hey. you’re impacting the ppl you interact with and you’re being a *dick*#and after we see him care more not just for his crew (like keeping his promise to gillion to not lie or just trying to know them better)#but like. signing for la alma. giving up grimms magic to revive people. stealing from royalty to give to an orphanage#loffinlot chip just… WOULDNT do that. it wouldn’t help him and just puts him at risk. just ignore it keep your head down and leave.#and even WITH that growth he’s still got that selfish streak— in the most positive sense of the term#him turning down Lizzie’s army offer in joaldo is him prioritizing those close to him over the needs of the many#(versus with Grimm doing what serves the most— self-sacrifice is easier to swallow)#anyway. tumblr mobile stopped showing my last tags like 7 lines ago so im stopping here just.#know that fucker is rotating in here again.
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tiny-huts · 2 years
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I think one of the loveliest part of the prewritten campaign modules is seeing fanart for all the different characters and hearing about the different ways they were a part of people's campaigns and hearing about the cute little variations in personalities that different DMs give them. But sometimes the flipside of that is looking at how someone talks about a character and being like? That's not MY son?
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badolmen · 1 year
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“Sorry for all the pings” as though I’m not the one single handedly keeping the friend group meeting regularly despite adult life schedules across three states.
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bi-writes · 2 months
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mail order bride meeting 141 for the first time 🙏
mail-order bride
he likes the way this moment sounds. it will end soon, when you both walk out the door, but for now, he sits, and he doesn't want it to end.
it's not just the sound of the television. his favorite football team has finally fucking put one into the corner of the net. the announcers cheer, but this isn't all that he hears.
the cat is in the kitchen. he can't see it, but he hears it (the little fucker). she's pawing at the cat grass that sits above the sink now. when he leans forward, he notices her little nose pushing it around before she takes a bite out of it.
she leaves the basil alone.
and then there's the sound of you. your feet in the bedroom. when you pass by the doorway, he can see you in different states of getting ready. when you pass by this time, he can see your eyeliner is on both eyes now, not just one, and your hair doesn't have clips or pieces to hold it in its style anymore. it lays perfectly now; he did a double-take when he saw it this way for the first time. you're rifling through the closet now. your clothes used to be in their own drawers. separated. socks not touching one another. your half of the closet, and his half. perfectly divided.
he doesn't remember when it happened. he found your bra under his t-shirt today. he was going through the jackets because your dresses were now between them. in the bathroom, he almost stuck your toothbrush in his mouth because they rest side-by-side in the holder.
when he looks around the room, he can't see where you begin, and he cannot see where he ends. he doesn't see where he started.
but he can see where you will go.
you bounce into the living room, holding up two hangers. there's dresses on each of them, one a dark color, the other light, and you hold them in front of simon who's still sitting on the couch, his head in his hand as he concentrates on the game (where he pretends like he hasn't been thinking about you too hard to really focus).
"simon?" you call, and he grunts, looking over at you. "which one do you like?"
he looks over the two dresses before looking at you. he hums, leaning back against the couch. he shrugs before looking back at the telly. you would look like perfection in either of them, but that isn't what you asked, and that isn't the answer you want.
"the darker one. like ya in tha' color."
you smile a little before going back into the bedroom, hanging the other dress back up and laying the other one out on the bed. you rummage through the dresser for proper undergarments, picking a soft lace pair of panties with a matching bra. you slip them on before stepping into the dress.
you reach around for the waist, and when your attempts to grab it are futile, you look over your shoulder towards the door.
"simon?" you call out gently. "could you come here, please?"
there's a shuffle of sound before simon steps into the bedroom. you point to your back, smiling at him shyly.
"c-could you help me? i can't reach the zipper."
he makes his way over to where you stand in front of the mirror. you watch as his eyes roam over your back, as he takes in the sight in front of him. you swallow as he drags a few knuckles down the length of your spine, his eyes flicking up to meet yours in the mirror before he takes the zipper in his hand and pulls it up. when he finishes, he steps a little closer, dipping his head to look at you from over your shoulder. you turn your head to look up at him, smiling.
"everything okay?" you ask softly, and he clicks his tongue, sliding his hand from its place on your back to wrap around your middle. he spreads a big palm over your tummy before dragging you backwards, your backside pressing against his front.
"mmm..." he scrunches his nose a little, running a pink tongue over his teeth. "look fuckin' beautiful."
you giggle, looking away, spreading your palms along your cheeks to try and make it less hot, less warm--fuck, it's so hot, isn't it?
you pull away to go for your shoes, picking them up from the closet. you take a seat on the bed, trying to ignore simon's stare (impossible), and you put the shoes down to slip your feet into them. just as you bend to buckle them, simon tsks, and you sit up as he kneels down in front of you.
"simon, you--"
"shut it," he mutters, reaching down and picking your foot up by the ankle gently. he wraps the strap around it, fastening the buckle, and you open your mouth to say something, but then he bends, giving your knee a soft kiss before reaching for your other foot.
your eyes meet again as he wraps it around your ankle. he smirks, just enough, and your lip wobbles a little as he fastens the next shoe before setting it back down on the floor. he puts his hands on his knee to get up, standing to his full height, and your neck strains as you try and look up at him.
at times, you feel at odds. he anticipates your needs before you even know what they are yourself. he pushes your meals in front of you just as you realize you're hungry. he helps you to the top shelf whenever you need it, picking you up from your waist without even a grunt. he feeds the cat when she cries, he wipes the tears from your face just as they fall.
you want to be more. you want to be his wife. your life is leisure and warmth, you are cared for like a fine porcelain doll, but what are you to him? what do you do for him? what is it that you bring, why are you here, why did he ever even want you if he provides and all you do is take, take, take?
the pub is alive. the lights flicker and glow a warm orange, and there's many crowds around tables, cheering and laughing and clinking pints together. you swallow as you look around; a crowded place with lots of unfamiliar faces. you freeze at the door, blinking, trying to take it all in. just as you stiffen, there's a presence right at your back.
an arm circles around your middle protectively. simon's warm hand rests at the curve of your waist, and you look up at him. he stares down at you knowingly. he's wearing his mask, obscuring his entire face except for his eyes, but you've learned to read him all the same. his hood darkens the shadows over him, but you see what he's telling you easily.
'm right 'ere.
simon moves you in front of him, walking just behind you, and he leans over to murmur in your ear as he guides you forward.
"in the corner, luv."
you barely have time to register that your husband just called you love when you see an enthusiastic wave meant for you out of the corner of your eye.
simon showed you their pictures, but the grainy selfies from his phone don't do them any justice. kyle has a pearly smile and round cheeks (troublemaker, he could get away with anything with those eyes). johnny has an infectious grin and wild curls that fall in a line down his head (a wild card, he's got eyes that you can't read and a leg bouncing from his terrible inability to sit still). and then there's john, hidden under a beanie and a rough smile (all business, all thought, because even out here, he can't stop his mind from wandering back to the papers on his desk and the cries for help he can't ignore).
johnny's smile drops a little when you come near. he eyes the hand that simon has on you, the proximity of your bodies. he raises a brow when you hold out your hand to shake, gawking when he eyes your other hand, the ring that sparkles there.
"ach, LT..." johnny swallows hard. "is this...is she--?"
simon clears his throat. "this is my wife."
"steamin' jesus," johnny breathes, leaning back in the booth. he picks up his drink and knocks back the entire thing, choking a little as he looks between the two of you. "what the fawk?!"
you blink, stepping back, and simon takes a seat beside john, shaking his head.
"fuckin' hell, johnny. behave," simon mutters. "'s not--"
"ye said y'were showin' us yer new lass," johnny quips. "not yer wife!"
you look at simon, laughing a little.
"simon, you didn't tell them you were married?"
"tha' was need t'know," simon mutters, rolling his eyes. you giggle, looking around for somewhere to sit. simon doesn't give you much time to choose--you let out a shaky breath as he picks you up from your hips, sliding you up and onto his thigh. he spreads his legs a little to accommodate you, but he's such a big man.
simon holds one hand at your back, and the other lays flat against the table. it's easy, falling into conversation with them. they don't talk about work. they're infatuated with their lieutenant and his surprise wife. they ask if he owns pajamas. they ask if he takes the mask off to sleep. they ask if simon whittles, if he listens to music, if there's a snack that puts him in a good mood (jaffa cakes, you tell johnny, who cackles with delight).
when simon gets up to have a smoke, you're surprised. simon never leaves you alone in a public place, ever. he's always at your back, even at the grocery store. he likes to take you aisle by aisle, and he doesn't care if it makes the trip longer, because he doesn't like to have you out of his sight for very long.
he gives you that look, one that you can read. you're safe with these men.
you agree. they bring simon home, every single time.
"awwww, no' gonna give yer lass a smooch, LT?" johnny winks. "'s alright, we don't care. won't think ye a big softie cuz o' it."
simon rolls his eyes, pocketing his cigarettes as he stands by the table. he dips his fingers into johnny's pint and flicks him with it before leaning over and kissing you lightly through the mask, a chaste kiss that already leaves you reeling.
you blink, caught off guard, and you blink up at simon so slowly, a syrupy smile falling over your face.
"LT, that wasnae a real one," johnny rolls his eyes. "wut, are ye scared of us?"
"shut your fuckin' mouth, sergeant, i'll make y'do laps tomorrow."
"big baby."
you watch simon take the back door, letting it swing shut behind him. you excuse yourself, following after him, pushing the door open and blinking to adjust to the dark light of the alleyway.
there's stars out. they sparkle, and you pause to stare up at them for just a moment before making your way to where simon leans against a brick wall.
it all reminds you that you're just small. not small, but smaller than simon, and compared to what stares at you across a violet sky, you are nothing but specks in time. you're drifters, composites of organic matter that somehow, for some reason, exist at the same time.
simon's eyes find your own in the dark. it's hard to see; the only light nearby flickers, and it's hard to focus, but you can see his eyes clearly, magnetized even when the rest of him seems so obscure, hiding from your view.
your smile is clear, too. the watery lines of your eyes, they glow, and when you come near, you and simon are in your own bubble, a pocket of the universe that cannot be explained. he has found you, and you have found him, and even when the night sky tries so hard to hide the things you know are there, it isn't strong enough to take away what exists in the in-between.
you slide your fingers under the hem of his mask. this kind of thing is practiced. the same thing you do when he comes home every day. the only acts of service he ever allows, the only things he ever lets you do.
you ask yourself always what it is that you provide. what it is that he sees in you that you can't seem to see in yourself.
maybe it's this. maybe it's the grounding. the gravity he never used to feel, the orbit he could never quite get himself to maintain, the taut line of connection that's been severed ever since the only people he's ever loved were ripped right out from underneath his ribs.
he puts his hands over yours when the mask is over his nose. his palms over the backs of your hands, warm skin over soft, something broken over something seeking.
"you don't want this," simon whispers, and you frown a little, shaking your head.
"how...how can you say that?"
"i'm not..." he flinches a little. "not made for this. 's not wha' y'think."
you're eyes water. you aren't sad. you're upset.
"y-you have no idea," you whisper. "i know what i want. you can always tell when i'm lying, am i lying now?"
"'s not--"
"simon," you stop him. "look at me," you sniffle, and he closes his eyes, squeezes them shut, before finding your gaze again. it's frightening, what he sees. he sees nothing that he expects. no deception. no fear. the honesty, it terrifies him. the reality of accepting what he can't understand hurts inside. it trickles deep, down to his toes, along his spine, a curdling in his stomach that he can't believe because there's no way that someone can love me when i can't fucking love myself. "am i lying now?"
"no," he breathes, and your smile is sickly sweet. he doesn't understand. he doesn't get it. nothing in his life has ever been this easy. nothing in his life has ever been just for him, all for him, just his, and no one else's. there has never been a piece of life that has ever pitied him enough to let him have it exactly as it is, and yet here she is, my perfect girl, arriving on my doorstep.
like you dropped straight from heaven. angels with soft hands and a timid face and a shadow with soft fur and big eyes and terrible little temper.
simon's hand is an anchor on the back of your head. tilting you to the side, drawing you near, until you are on your toes, and your face is canted up.
you kiss in the dark. your mouth slots over his, hands gripping the front of his jacket as you try and get even closer to him. he's a little shy at first, letting you lead while he follows, but it only takes a few seconds for you to feel his hand stiffen against your head as he kisses you feverishly.
you smile between kisses. he smiles, too. you giggle, and he huffs, and he chases you with more kisses as you cradle his face between your hands and whisper between soft presses, i'm sorry and i know and it's all i've ever wanted.
when you pull away, he doesn't let you go. he presses your forehead to his, connecting you somehow, breathing in the warmth that you radiate to try and calm the pulsing of his blood that rushes in his ears.
when your eyes open again, and you look at each other, everything is suddenly clearer. whatever he saw before, everything must have been in black and white.
he sees in color. the stars align. they fall, one by one, sparkling as they form a pattern, one undiscovered by anyone before him, one he will keep all to himself in the time that follows. when he kisses you again, he memorizes that pattern.
he knows it will always lead right back to you.
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redsray · 4 months
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i do love the idea of the wayne kids giving bernard shovel talks about taking care of tim and all that but also give me batfam who are just as protective of bernard as they are of each other.
give me bernard, attending his first wayne gala as tim's significant other. having a suit custom tailored and funded by bruce even if bernard insists it's not necessary because he already has one. arriving at the gala anxious because of course he is, it's a goddamn socialite event, but being protected from every side by the wayne kids even when tim is dragged away.
Socialite: Oh, and who might you be?
Bernard: Oh, um, hi. I'm Bernard Dowd, nice to meet you.
Socialite: Dowd? I've never heard of your family before. Who...?
Bernard: I'm not here with my family, miss, I'm here with my boyfriend.
Socialite: ... Boyfriend?
Bernard: Yeah, I'm here with Tim.
Socialite, frowning: Tim... as in Drake-Wayne? He has a boyfriend?
Dick, coming up next to Bernard: He sure does! Bernard here is practically one of ours now, aren't you? He matters to Timmy, so he matters to us.
Bernard: Dick—
Dick: C'mon, let's get you back to Timmy. Farewell, Mrs!
Bernard: I could've handled that.
Dick: All the rules that apply to my siblings during galas apply to you too. I'm sure you could've, but you shouldn't have to. I've got your back too, now, yeah?
Bernard: ... Yeah. Thanks, Dick.
Jason, coming up to Bernard at the bar: Not to freak you out, kid, but there's a guy starin' at ya from the other side of the bar. Y'know him or should I encourage him to look away?
Bernard, startled: Huh? (looks around) Oh. No, I don't know him. Why... is he looking at me like that, actually?
Jason, scowling: 'S just how the slimy fuckers at these events are. Can't keep their eyes off anything that's small, young or pretty. Disgusting. I'll deal with him— where's your annoying other half gone, inferior blondie?
Bernard: Tim? He got pulled away for quote; 'something important' by some lady. He said he'll meet me here after he's done, so I've been waiting.
Jason: Huh. If I see him I'll point him yer way. Hey, don't be 'fraid to ask any of us questions or for help if ya need it. We know the best how daunting this shit can be.
Bernard, genuinely touched: ... Thanks, Jason.
Jason: Yeah, yeah. Don't tell Timmers I said that, though, he'll call me a loser.
Bernard, laughing: I won't.
Bernard, being talked to by several people at once and a bit overwhelmed by the attention: Uh— I'm—
Damian, stepping between him and the socialites: Dowd. I require your assistance.
Bernard: Um— hi, Damian— with what?
Damian: You will see when we get there. Follow me, Drake's more tolerable half.
Bernard: Okay... so what do you need from me?
Damian: Nothing. You seemed to dislike the attention from all of the nosy adults over there. It was the most efficient way of extracting you from the situation.
Bernard: Oh. Thanks, Damian.
Damian: Tt, don't thank me yet, Dowd. I am still criticising your choice in romantic partners.
Bernard: Didn't you threaten me with a katana to not dampen Tim's mood in any way shape or form?
Damian: Slander. I said quote 'if you make Drake more annoying by breaking his heart I'm going to maim you.' I don't see how you got the message you did from that.
Bernard, grinning: Sure, Damian. Sure.
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izzy-b-hands · 1 year
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This was supposed to be a short, cheap, easy fill for 'nightclub', in which Jack is established as 'that friend' who always has a wild new business idea and relies on friends who love him to help provide seed money for each venture (and to keep him aloft in the in between when unfortunately for him it all inevitably falls apart. Bc he's a good ideas guy, but not always a good executioner or maintainer of his ideas guy)
Now it's almost 3k words and includes: (spoilers for today's au-gust fill below the cut)
-Jack stealing Izzy's classic car (I only kind of mention what kind, but in my head it's for sure a late 60s or early 70s model Alfa Romeo Spider or Spider Veloce) and it being established that this isn't the first time Jack has stolen Izzy's car for funds for a new idea (because Izzy might find him frustrating, but Jack is a friend of Ed's and so Izzy does his best to try and help Jack too)
-the fact that Izzy isn't rich enough to be able to afford this hobby easily; he's been grinding and working and saving up for it (an even bigger expense bc the implication is for this story everyone is currently living in the States, so he had to win an auction and then pay to import it over from Europe AND then pay for the repairs and restoration, whether done by himself and Roach or hired mechanics)
-the property Jack wants to use for the nightclub being in fucking Medora, ND, because I've been thinking about ND again and couldn't think of a worse place to try and set up a nightclub.
-it's also implied to be nearly winterish weather for the East Coast where Ed, Stede, Roach, Izzy (and usually Jack lmao) are, and definitely bad winter weather for the Midwest/ND (bc in the years prior to my moving to CT, I remember talking abt and showing blizzard pics the same months that folks out this way were cold for sure and maybe starting to get frosty, but not always to the degree of what ND would be getting hit with lmao.)
-Jack is driving the stolen car there. An Alfa Romeo Spider. In the winter. It would be funny if it wasn't just plain dangerous, but that's where his buyer is, you see.
-they've finally made contact with him only for Jack to immediately be manipulative about coming back/the police being involved, and him refusing to turn around. But he acknowledges the good hard work and money Izzy and Roach have put into the car, and promises that they'll get half the payment for the car back from him.
-The rest of it is his seed money to start the club. Cuz he'll already be out in ND at that point, so he can keep going on with his plan easily enough. Two birds one stone, all that jazz
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ba9go · 16 days
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guard dog katsuki
katsuki being protective of you when you wear a short dress out on a date with him
bakugou katsuki x fem!reader (sfw) just a teensy bit suggestive but mostly fluff
katsuki loves it when you dress up on dates.
partially because you’ve dolled yourself up for him, doing your hair all nice and spritzing that damn perfume that katsuki’s addicted to. but even more so because he loves it when his girl’s feeling all pretty and confident. as you should, always.
it’s a friday night and katsuki’s picking you up from your place to bring you out to a really nice restaurant for dinner. it’s been a long, tiring week, and you’re a real sight for sore eyes, in that little black dress that sits tight on all your curves.
it’s gorgeous on you. you look absolutely ravishing in it (and katsuki has every intention of ravishing you later tonight), so really, katsuki has no complaints about the dress.
but god, katsuki hates the way these extras are looking at you.
katsuki glares at every guy who walks past you with their eyes clearly glued to you. as if his arm isn’t wrapped securely around your waist. as if it wasn’t already clear that you belong to him.
“katsuki, you okay?” you ask, looking up at him sweetly. “you’ve been kinda quiet.”
“my bad,” katsuki mutters, but he doesn’t meet your gaze. he’s busy staring down some depraved fucker who’s shamelessly staring at your ass from across the street. “m’listenin’, jus’ keep talkin’.”
but you’re not dense, and you quickly realise that katsuki’s irritated by all the unwanted attention you’re receiving.
“sorry, kats,” you grimace as you pull down your dress in an attempt to make it seem more modest. “i left my jacket in your car, i should’ve taken it with me to the restaurant.”
“you cold?” katsuki asks. you shake your head. “then what d’ya need your jacket for?”
“to cover up a lil.”
“why? ya not feelin’ comfortable?” katsuki asks almost demandingly, like an overly concerned parent, and you can’t help but laugh.
“i’m okay, katsuki, but i feel bad. you’re like my guard dog, glaring at every sketchy guy we walk by. this wouldn’t be a problem if—”
“if people weren’t freaks,” katsuki finishes for you. “s’got nothin’ to do with you, darlin’. you look beautiful tonight, as always.”
“thank you, katsuki.” you smile. katsuki tightens his arm around you and looks at you like you hung the stars in the sky tonight.
“i got you covered princess.”
katsuki does indeed have you covered. a drunk guy asking for your number almost knocks into you and proceeds to get kicked to the curb by katsuki.
BONUS:
“hey, dollface! can i get your number?”
“hey, fucker, want mine instead?” katsuki snaps so quickly you have to hold back your laughter.
“woah there, buddy, calm down!”
“this is me being calm, dipshit. can’t you see my girl’s holdin’ my hand right now? that’s the only thing keeping me from going over there and fucking you up, so you’d better hightail it out of here before i kill you for even thinkin’ that trash like you could ever deserve a chance with my gi—”
“katsuki, enough. he’s already running away, see?”
“…yes, ma’am.”
“good. thanks for being such a good dog, ‘suki.”
“the fuck did you just call me?! …not in public, dumbass.”
say “woof” katsuki! 🦴
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evilminji · 7 months
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The more I learn about John Constantine? The more I am certain you COULD just... dump Danny on him.
Like... literally.
Full on, sack of unconscious potatoes, "here ya go, deal with it, here's an unconscious royal teenager!", Dumped in his arms/lap at some shitty hole in the wall bar, by Suspicious Supernatural Forces, DUMPED on him. Like? Yep. It's a Tuesday. Guess he's NOT getting to finish this beer.
And you know what?
Knowing the crowd Danny runs with? They'd at least... SORTA try and explain what's happening? Instead of play the fun ol "HOT POTATO! Think fast, Constantine! Figure it out!" And run shpeal that he normally deals with. Thoughtful, really.
Don't get him wrong. It's still BULLSHIT. But at least he has a vague idea of WHY he's holding an unconscious, heavily bleeding, half-divine-but-not-really half human, teenager.
Fuckers left a few sticky notes.
THANKS.
He just LOVES patching up actively radioactive wounds while trying to translate... what is this? Mesopotamian? Who writes out their emojis in Mesopotamian?! "Smiling face emotional picture" my ASS. Still...
Kid in way over their head, hunted by damn never everyone for trying to do the right thing, AND grappling with their recent lose of a decent chunk of their own humanity? Oh and now he's KING of a whole spankin new Realm!
Fuck "Realms". Nothing ever good comes out of "Realms".
And APPARENTLY? His VIP returning customers spot under the Bus has been reserved! Because he's the kid's "Gaurdian". Why? So the nice Goverment stooges in suits will come knocking on HIS door first, of course.
......he'd be more pissed about that one if he wasn't REAL interested in what those bastards had to say for themselves. Meddling with forces they shouldn't be touching. Provoking God only knows what. He fucking KNEW those storms weren't natural.
Just? John getting handed a Suspect Youth. Press X for doubt and Sus. Okay... then give him back. No! Fuck you, says local Laughing Magician, I don't trust you EITHER.
Danny wakes up to the... VERY? Ngl? Intense(tm) stare down of... holy shit, are you an Actual Angel? (Yes. He is. Better hope you're not secretly evil or he's gonna bring The Smiting) Then the world's ACTUAL greatest Detective, who is a chimpanzee, offers him expertly made tea and the cheap take-out John brought with him.
He is in Space.
It's still not the weirdest morning he's ever had. But it's getting there.
@the-witchhunter @hdgnj @hypewinter @nerdpoe @lolottes @babbling-babull
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conspiracy-ash · 5 months
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LUKE !!!
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peachsukii · 4 months
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There’s something so intimate about getting wounded on the battlefield when defending someone you love, especially when you haven’t started dating yet.
I imagine early 20s Bakugo going to assist pro hero reader, not doubting your strength, but because he needs to know you’re okay after the communicator went radio silent. He arrives on scene, watching you go toe to toe with the most wanted villain in the area. It’s only for a moment before he rushes in, but he’s entranced with the way your body moves as your ducking and weaving attacks - the moves he taught you.
The fight goes on for a few more blows before the villain lands a successful shot on you both - nothing fatal, but enough to hurt like a bitch. Bakugo’s grumbling to get himself out from underneath the rubble that’s fallen atop him after slamming into a nearby building. He looks up and catches the moment you’re knocking the villain flat on his ass with one hell of a punch. Huffing, you run to his side and start shoving debris off of him, blood and sweat dripping from your forehead as he watches you in silence.
“Here,” you hook your arms under Bakugo’s, holding onto his back in an embrace. “Hold on to me, I’ll pull you out.”
And he does without hesitation - any excuse to be close with you. When he’s fully freed, you pull back to do a once over to see if he’s hurt, starting the standard hero evaluation. He stops you, insisting he’s fine before cradling your face with his dirtied glove.
“Are you okay? Scared the shit outta me when your comm went dark.” He wipes away some dried blood from your chin. “I rushed over thinkin’ you were in trouble.”
You can’t help but laugh, flattered that he’d ditch his current position to come help you. “I must’ve smashed it during the fight. I didn’t even notice until now.”
“Dumbass, be more careful!” Bakugo scolds, shaking his head dramatically. “I need ya in one piece for our dinner date tomorrow.”
A smile crosses your face, tilting your head into his hand. “I’m alright, Kats, no worries. Besides, I would expect you to deliver it to me in the hospital if that were the case. No way am I letting a broken bone stop me from eating your cooking!”
Bakugo wouldn’t admit how much that made his stomach cartwheel and heart flutter in his chest, so he chooses to cover it with a grin instead.
“Good. Now let’s turn this fucker in and head back.”
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bitterkarella · 6 months
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Midnight Pals: Spicy Stories
JK Rowling: hello children Poe: oh Poe: oh joanne Poe: you're back Rowling: i have concernss Poe: uh we're mostly about just telling stories here Poe: you have your own campfire for your terf stuff don't you? Rowling: yess but they've really been getting on my nervess lately
Rowling: you know how it iss with terf deatheaterss Poe: not really Rowling: alwayss agreeing with everything i ssay Rowling: all "oh yes dark lord" this and "oh spare me dark lord" that Rowling: ssometimess you jusst get tired of hearing "masterful gambit dark lord"
Rowling: i tell you, you don't know how hard it is to run a cult L Ron Hubbard: oh yeah woof big mood Hubbard: people think its all fun, but its actually a lot of work Rowling: I know right????
Poe: regardless, joanne, i'm going to have to put my foot down Poe: this campfire is just for stories Rowling: uhhh actually i do have a new ssstory Rowling: i wass insspired to write after having an argument on the internet Barker: oh damn no shit? Barker: that's wild
Rowling: it's a new harry potter ssstory King: oh man! it's about time, i've been hoping for a new potter story for ages! Rowling: itss about hermione going back in time to help grindelwald, who actually had sssome good points if you think about it
Rowling: i call it Rowling: the time turner diariesss Barker: wow this is not really funny anymore Baker: its like INTENSELY not funny Lovecraft: catchy title tho!
Rowling: i'm retconning grindelwald into a misundersstood idealisst Rowling: who was only forced to make hard choicess because of the unreassonablenesss of decadent weimar society
Rowling: oh also you know that thing where people kept criticizing me cuz technically grindelwald's "evil" plan was to prevent the holocaust? Rowling: well good news Rowling: i've rectified that little mistake
Rowling: like, why would the naziss target transs & queer people, traditionally the most powerful and widely accepted memberss of ssociety? Rowling: would not the naziss, famouss for their love of diverssity, actually approve of them? Rowling: i'm jusst asskin questions
King: actually joanne there's a lot of well-documented evidence Barker: give it up steve King: no no i can fix this King: i'm sure if i just lay out the facts in a logical, well-reasoned manner- Barker: oh god that's so cute Barker: don't you just love him? Poe: that's our steve
King: so you see the nazi book burning of the institute for sexualwissenschaft- Rowling: nope Rowling: didn't happen King: King: well it kinda did, see, as i was saying- Rowling: thiss iss missogyny
Rowling: i don't undersstand you lot at all Rowling: i come into your campfire, i make a sstatement that i really want to be true & you all refuse to accept it Rowling: thiss issn't the way it works over with my terf deatheaters at all Rowling: they love accepting things i ssay!
Rowling: it'ss actually really missogynisstic that you all refusse to accept what i'm ssaying asss truth Rowling: even though you all know how badly i want it to be true King: but joanne, it isn't true- Rowling: ssave it for court ssteve!
Mary Shelley: sup fuckers Shelley: i got here late wot's going on? Barker: joanne is doing holocaust denial Rowling: EXCUSE ME it'ss only holocausst denial if you quesstion the murder of jews Rowling: tho now that i think about it i do have some questionss
Rowling: like, would they not have ussed their goblin magic to essscape? Lovecraft: ya know, she makes a good point Sonia Greene: i'm right here howard Lovecraft: Greene: see, this is why i don't talk much
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