Note
please please please more hockey cregan
Synopsis: You both agreed it was casual when you began this situationship with the Wolves’ hockey captain. It was exactly what you needed at the time. But, as time passes, it’s getting hard being a chill girl — because you're not. Every time you hear him tell people it’s nothing serious, it stings a little more. Because in your heart, it hasn’t felt casual for a while now
Three times Cregan tells people you’re not together, and one time he does
After weeks of waiting, my new modern!Cregan fic is here!! Sorry for the long wait. October was stressfull and busy (creating halloween content is fun but also exhausting!), and then my mom got bad health news and that turned my whole world upside down. I hope you'll like it <3 Please send more hockey au requests, i love writing them
Warnings: 18+, sexting (sort of), oral (f receiving), car sex, misunderstanding, men being clueless and blind
—
You: A little something so you think about me while on the ice 💕
You: [picture attached]
It was cruel, but you liked to tease Cregan before his games. Especially the away ones where he wouldn't be able to touch you after. Today, you went with a simple snap of your lace panties, the kind you knew made his dick painfully hard.
Cregan: Fuck 🥵
More messages appeared on your screen.
Cregan: Hate when you do shit like that
Cregan: How am I supposed to be getting ready for the game?
Cregan: Little minx! 👿🖕🏻
You were tempted to send another picture, to push with the teasing. You could imagine Cregan in his bedroom, in his gray joggers, cursing as he felt his dick stiffen from the sight of your underwear. It was almost 5pm, and he needed to be at the arena an hour early for warm ups and some locker room talk. If he jerked off now, he would be in a time crunch for the arena. You didn’t want him to get in trouble.
You: If you win tonight, I might let you take them off
It was crazy to wear a skirt to a hockey game, but you didn’t think of the cold air of the arena when you got dressed. All that was on your mind was the after-game party at the hockey house…and Cregan’s delicious cock inside you. The Wolves were playing against the Lions tonight — easy win —, so he’ll still be full of energy after the game. In other words, tonight will be a long and fun night.
‘’Aren’t you cold?’’ Rhaena’s eyes fell on your bare legs.
You shrugged. ‘’Nothing I can’t handle,’’ you brushed off.
The reason you dressed like that was so you wouldn’t need to go back to your dorm to change. You could go straight to the party. At least you wore a sweater over your corset bra. You would get frostbites by exposing your nipples to the arena’s cold air. Not pleasant. Although Cregan probably wouldn’t mind warming them up with his tongue later.
‘’You’re lucky Baela’s not here tonight,’’ Rhaena said, pulling you out of your naughty thoughts. ‘’She would have lectured you about the risks of getting sick and spiraled about how irresponsible it is to risk getting the whole campus sick. People will miss classes, possibly fail their trimester, and blah blah blah.’’ She laughed, perfectly imitating her sister’s softer voice with a tinge of scolding. ‘’Nursing school is getting to her.’’
Sweet Baela. You were curious how she’ll make it as a nurse if she continued being this stressed about sickness. It was sweet of her to care, but she really needed to relax.
A group of girls came to your row and next to you. One of them had a hockey jersey on — a girlfriend, assumingly —, and the others were dressed casually. If you remember correctly, her name was Talisa. You gave her a smile, then turned your attention back to Rhaena.
‘’How was your date with Luke? You never told me.’’
Judging by the smile on her face, it must have gone well.
The hockey house was packed, the typical crowd buzzing after another one of the games. Players, friends, usual fans, and even people who didn’t go to the game came to bask in the afterglow of a win. It’s an ambiance no frat party can match.
You walked through the crowd, expertly dodging a spilled beer incident as you searched for the Wolves’ captain. You saw some of the players around, shower-damp hair and a beer in their hands, so they must have begun to arrive at the house.
While you waited, you busied yourself with a drink and sent Cregan a little teaser.
You: Come find me 🍒💋
You: [video attached]
The video had been taken prior to the game. Just a short little video of you groping your tits, which were spilling at the top of your corset bra.
Although he claimed to love all of your body, Cregan Stark was a breasts man. He liked to lay his head on them, suck on them — and come on them —, and to use them as stress balls. They fit perfectly in the palms of his hands.
So, when you hit ‘send’, you knew he would search the house for you and drag you to his room.
Standing in the kitchen in all his post-game glory, Cregan was laughing with his teammates like he didn’t have a care in the world. A joke about one of the rookies — they get teased a lot. His laughter came short when he opened your text, not expecting a fucking video. He held back a groan as he watched you play with your tits, wishing he had his hands on them right now.
Cregan must have been staring for too long because Ben peered over to his phone screen to see what had taken his captain’s attention. ‘’Ohh, nice tits! Who’s that?’’
Beside him, Jace took a look too. He whistled, agreeing with Ben.
‘’Damn, is that your girl, Stark?’’ another teased, taking Cregan’s phone to get a better look and replaying the video again.
Cregan shook his head, taking a sip of beer. ‘’Nah. It’s casual.’’
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°
‘’Did you see my bra?'' you asked as you walked around Cregan’s bedroom in your panties and one of his shirts, searching for the missing piece. ‘’I can’t find it.’’
Cregan, still lying in bed, barely lifted his head to glance around. ‘’Eh, no,’’ he muttered, too lazy to really help.
You sighed, hands on your hips as you scanned the room. It had to be somewhere.
He pointed lazily toward his dresser. ‘’I think it’s by my gym bag, over there.’’
You raised an eyebrow. His gym bag? How could it have ended there?
You bent down and checked, pushing aside sneakers and a Wolves hoodie. ‘’Are you sure? Because I see no bra here.’’
‘’Search deeper, maybe you should see to get glasses,’’ he teased, a smirk playing across his mouth as his eyes stayed glued to your bent-over form, obviously enjoying the view more than helping you search.
‘’Cregan, it’s not there! Maybe you should get glasses,’’ you returned, your tone showing your patience was running thin. ‘’Are you fucking with me right now?’’
His laugh gave him away, and that’s when you realized what he was doing.
You shot him a glare over your shoulder. ‘’You’re an ass.’’ You stood, his shirt covering your thighs again. ‘’And I thought you liked my tits better?’’
“I do.” Cregan smirked, leaning back into the pillows, arms behind his head. “But they’re covered right now, and your ass is right there in my line of sight. So I’m appreciating the view.”
Before you could shoot back a reply, his phone buzzed on the bedside table. His smirk faded as he reached over to grab it, glancing at the screen.
“Hi, Mom,” he said, voice dropping to a softer, more polite tone.
You, too focused on hunting down your missing bra, didn’t even notice the phone conversation. Where was that damn bra? You could go home without your bra — you had other ones — and free the nips on the way to your dorm, but it was your favorite and you needed it back.
Finally, you spotted it half-hidden under the chair. “Got it!” you exclaimed, holding the bra up triumphantly. “It ended up under the chair. Probably wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t flung it across the room like an animal last night.’’
You laughed, but it died on your lips when you heard a woman’s voice faintly from the phone. Cregan’s mom.
‘’Cregan, was that a girl I heard in the background?’’ her voice asked, clear enough in the now-quiet room. ‘’I didn't know you were not alone.''
Cregan stiffened as he fumbled for an answer. ‘’Eh...''
‘’Bring her over for Thanksgiving next weekend,'' his mom cut in, excited.
‘’I don't think—''
‘’Sara is coming with her girlfriend, the more the merrier!''
‘’She's not my girlfriend, Mom. She's just... She...''
‘’Oh. Got it,'' she replied, the awkwardness sinking in over the line.
You couldn’t believe he said that to his mother. He could have said you were a friend. It would have been discreet and more respectful to you. But no, he told her you were the girl he was taking to his bed when he needed to empty his balls.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°
Panties pulled to the side, you had one of your feet on the dashboard while Cregan was knees deep in the passenger seat with his mouth on your cunt. A symphony of mewls and moans was slipping from your lips, your head thrown back against the headrest of the seat. Going to the backseat would have been a smartest idea, but it was filled up with hockey shit and unusable.
To make more room, the passenger seat of the jeep was pushed as far as it would allow, but Cregan was tall and broad — it was simply impossible to make it comfortable for him. He didn’t seem to care that it was cramped and that he could barely move. All he cared about was watching and hearing you squirm from his tongue.
You gripped his shoulder, fingernails digging through the thick material of his sweater, needing something to grip as he sucked on your clit and sent jolts of pleasure up your spine.
It’s crazy what a 9pm trip to get In-n-Out can lead up. The puck bunnies who hung around the team would throw knives at you if they knew where you had him right now…
‘’I’m close— Aah, please don’t stop.’’ You pushed your cunt against his face, as if it wasn’t glued to it already. ‘’If you stop I’ll fucking kill you, Stark.’’
Cregan was very tempted to stop just to mess with you — he took pleasure in that —, but instead kept going, his stubble scratching your inner thighs as he kept his head buried between them.
The jeep's interior filled with the sounds of your ragged breathing and the wet, desperate noises of his mouth working against you. You felt the buildup, that white-hot tension coiling tighter and tighter until it finally snapped, sending you tumbling over the edge. Your thighs trembled around his head, and your hips bucked uncontrollably as a loud moan escaped your lips. Cregan kept going, drawing out every last shudder, his tongue working you through the waves of pleasure until you were nearly limp in his hands.
He finally pulled back, a crooked grin curling on his lips as he looked up and slapped the crotch of your panties into place on your sensitive cunt. You winced and glared at him. Could he be a little more delicate?
You watched as he opened the passenger door, getting out with comical difficulty. What was he expecting?
He moved to the driver side and turned on the car, swearing when he saw the time. ‘’Shit.’’ Cregan ran a hand through his hair, and searched for his phone, quickly typing a message to someone. ‘’Do you mind if we’re making a little detour on the way? I was supposed to pick Jace up, but we got…carried away and it completely slipped out of my mind. I’ll drop you off after.’’
Couldn’t he take a bus or an uber? You felt uncomfortable about someone other than Cregan seeing you like that — fucked out. You must be looking a mess with your panties going up your ass from being pulled to the side and your skirt all hiked up, face flushed from your orgasm.
‘’Yeah. It’s fine,’’ you said with a forced smile, shifting on the seat to adjust your clothes and trying to regain some composure.
After a few minutes of driving, Cregan pulled up to the curb where Jace was waiting. He got in the Jeep, complaining about all the junk that was on the backseat while pushing it away to make space to sit.
When he finally clicked his seatbelt, his eyes flickering over your disheveled form and messy hair with a raised brow. ‘’Were you two on a date or something?” he asked, his tone carrying a teasing edge, not minding his business. ‘’Because you both look a little messy over there.’’
You felt your heart rate pick up. Was this a date? A date at a fast food place was not very romantic, but you couldn’t imagine Cregan taking a girl on a date at a fancy restaurant. It wasn’t him. He preferred simple things.
But this was not a date.
Maybe it’ll be one day.
Cregan rolled his eyes and shifted the Jeep back into drive. ‘’Shut up. We were not on a fucking date. We just got In-n-Out.’’
‘’And you didn’t take anything for me? I thought we were best friends, man…’’ Jace shook his head in disappointment.
The words stung, but it was his tone that hit deeper, as if the idea of a date with you was too absurd to even consider. It twisted something inside you, and you hated yourself for letting things drag on this long, pretending it was still casual when, in your heart, it hadn’t felt that way for a while now.
When you got to your dorm, you sent Cregan a text saying it was over between you.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°
''I don't want to be mean, but what were you expecting?'' Rhaena said, lounging on the couch beside you and Baela. Her tone was blunt, like she was stating the obvious, and it stung more than you cared to admit.
You had just finished telling them how you had called it off with Cregan — if you could call it that.
''Rhaena!'' Baela shot her sister a sharp look.
Rhaena shrugged, unfazed. ''It's known that hockey players don't do girlfriends. Clearly, he didn’t want anything serious; he just wanted sex. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have stayed casual for so long.’’
You didn’t expect Rhaena to turn on Cregan so fast, but it was comforting to hear that she had your back.
Baela shook her head, letting out a sigh. ‘’They're not all like that, Rhaena. Don't put everyone in the same basket. Cregan had a girlfriend for three years before college.''
Your brows shot up. A girlfriend?
‘’How do you know that?’’ you asked, surprised. Cregan never mentioned any past relationships.
‘’Alysanne told me,’’ Baela explained. ‘’She and Cregan used to go to high school together. Apparently, he had a tough time after the breakup and never had a girlfriend since.’’
That would explain why he never brought it up. Any why he was always correcting people when they assumed you were his girlfriend. Maybe that relationship scarred him so much he was scared of commitment now?
Rhaena scoffed. ‘’So it’s a valid reason to treat Y/N like that?’’
Baela glared at her. It was not what she was trying to say. ‘’Of course not. I just think it’s best to try to understand the other person’s side before jumping to conclusion. Girls are not the only ones who can get hurt from relationships, guys too.’’ She turned to you. ‘’What did he say when you told him you had feelings?’’
You looked down at your lap. ‘’I…I never told him.’’
Unexpectedly, Baela hit your arm.
‘’Why did you do that for?!’’ You rubbed the spot, frowning.
‘’For not telling him!’’ Baela said, exasperated. ‘’Guys are blind as hell. They don’t pick up signals. If you don’t tell them you like them, there’s chances they’ll never make a move.’’
You turned to Rhaena, who agreed with her sister about needing to be straightforward with guys. So, maybe the reason he corrected everyone was because he didn’t want them to get the wrong idea because this situationship was what you agreed on?
And they dare say girls are complicated and confusing…
‘’Well, that’s a bit late for that, isn’t it?’’ you concluded. ‘’Besides, if Cregan liked me, he would have said something when he got my text or called. He didn’t. Case closed.’’
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°
The case was not closed.
A few days later, Cregan was in the living room of the hockey house, hunched over on the couch with a controller gripped tightly in his hands. He was playing Call of Duty with Jace and was sorely losing. Every time his character took a hit, he grunted and smashed the buttons like he was trying to punch a hole through them.
''If you break the controller, you buy a new one,'' Jace warned, not even looking up from his own controller.
Cregan rolled his eyes. ''I'm not gonna break the damn controller,’' he snapped.
''Could've fooled me," Jace shot back, a smirk across his face. "Smashing the buttons is not gonna help your game, bro.''
Cregan grunted in response, and just as he got his character back on his feet, he got taken out by a sniper. Again. The muscles in his jaw tightened. ‘’Bullshit," he muttered, slamming the controller onto his thigh. "This controller's definitely broken. Let's switch, Jace."
Jace snorted, still lounging on the floor with his back against the coffee table. "Your controller's not broken, you’re just shit." He looked over at Cregan, who was glaring at the screen like it had personally offended him.
‘’Or, maybe our captain is sexually frustrated,’’ Ben chimed in as he wandered in from the kitchen, a bag of flamin’ Cheetos in hand. He plopped onto the couch next to Cregan, crunching loudly. ‘’You've been playing shit on the ice too, and you’re irritable.’’
Cregan shot him a look. ‘’I’m not—’’
‘’He got dumped by his girl, Ben,’’ Jace interrupted. ‘’So little Cregan’s getting lonely.’’
‘’First off, she was not my girlfriend,’’ Cregan said, setting the record straight — again. ‘’How many times did I tell you that? And second, don’t call my dick that. Actually, don’t call it anything.’’
Ben laughed. ‘’We should make you a Tinder profile so you can find a girl to fuck tonight or tomorrow, and we can have our captain back just in time for Friday’s game. What do you say, Jace?’’
Jace grinned, picking up on Ben's suggestion right away. "I’ll even help you with the bio, Cregan. How about, ‘Hockey captain, terrible at video games, but makes up for it in other areas’?’’
Cregan groaned, tossing a cushion at him. ‘’Fuck off. I don’t need a Tinder profile.’’
‘’But you do need to get laid,’’ Ben reminded, eating some more Cheetos. ‘’Why don’t you call that girl with the nice tits? You know, the one who sent you dirty pictures the other day?’’
His question was answered with the darkest glare.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°
The Wolves broke their winning streak since you called it off and lost every game. According to the whispers on campus, Cregan’s head was not on the ice.
Baela tried to convince you that it was because he was thinking of you, but you laughed and told her she was ridiculous. If Cregan was thinking about you, he would have called.
It wasn’t until the first fall of snow that you got a text from him, asking to come by the house to pick up a few things he had found in his room. Nothing worth going seemed to be missing, but you went anyway.
The house was quiet when you got there. Robb let you in and said Cregan was upstairs. The door was open, but you still knocked on the doorframe, announcing your presence. Cregan turned, and you had to fight the smile from your lips. It’s been a while since you last saw him — you missed him.
He greeted you with a hug, which you accepted. It was a brief but warm embrace, the scent of his pine cologne faint, yet familiar.
As he pulled back, you saw he was wearing shorts and a hoodie, a strange combo for late November.
‘’Thanks for coming,’’ Cregan said, not really knowing what to say.
‘’Well, you said you had some of my things,’’ you replied softly. The silence that filled the space was a tad uncomfortable, and you shifted your weight on your feet.
He nodded, remembering why you were there in the first place, and grabbed a bag — which contained your things. Cregan handed the bag to you, and as you took it, your fingers brushed lightly. A brief moment of contact, that sent a subtle spark through your fingertips.
The bag was light. Probably just a thong or two, and maybe a hair scrunchie. ‘’Is that everything?’’
He nodded again, but before you could turn on your heels and leave, Cregan stopped you. ‘’Actually, there's something else," he said slowly, his hand moving to rub nervously at the back of his neck. ‘’Can we sit down for a minute?"
You were momentarily thrown off by the request, but nodded nonetheless and took a seat on the edge of his bed, while Cregan sat beside you, leaving a small gap between the two of you. The last time you sat on that bed, Cregan’s cock was deep inside you and you were clutching his sheets.
‘’I want to apologize for how I treated you when we were…together-but-not-together,’’ Cregan began, snapping you out of your dirty thoughts. ‘’I didn’t realize I was hurting you when I was correcting people. I was just making sure people wouldn’t label us something we were not. I’ve never been with a girl outside a relationship before, so this was completely new to me. I didn’t know the dos and the don'ts, or how it worked…other than the having sex part.’’ He let out a dry laugh, then continued. ‘’I know it’s not an excuse. What I’m trying to say is, I truly didn’t mean to make you feel unworthy.’’
You listened as Cregan admitted his mistakes, and fidgeted with the hem of your sweater’s sleeve to keep your hands busy — to stop yourself from reaching for him. He hadn’t intended to hurt you, his lack of experience in situationships had gotten in the way.
His words hung in the air, and you could hear he was struggling to find the right words. It didn't feel rehearsed, he was genuinely apologizing and opening to you. Cregan was never one to lay himself bare like this. Feelings were not something he often discussed.
‘’If anyone is unworthy, it’s me. You’ve always been kind to me, even when I treated you poorly in your face.’’
You took a slow breath, steadying yourself. ‘’It’s okay, Cregan. What’s past is past.’’
He shook his head. ‘’No. It's not okay.’’
‘’We both agreed it was casual. I should have known better than to expect anything serious…’’
‘’What if I want something serious too?’’
You raised your head toward him, meeting his gaze for the first time in weeks.
‘’I didn’t ask you to come over just so you could pick your things up,’’ he admitted, his voice low. ‘’It was an excuse to talk to you, to see you…and hopefully fix what’s between us.’’ His hand inched a bit closer to yours on the bed, like he was considering reaching for you but hesitated. ‘’Being away from you made me realize what you meant to me and how important it was having you in my life, close to me. I miss your perfume lingering on my sheets and seeing your face in the stands cheering for me. I miss the way you feel in my arms. I miss hearing your voice, teasing me and making me laugh — I haven't laughed properly in weeks.’’ Cregan’s eyes were fixed on your face as he spoke, studying your reaction.
It was rare that you were speechless, but you truly didn’t know what to say. You came here to pick up a few personal items, and ended up listening to Cregan apologizing and confessing his feelings to you.
So you decided to make him laugh. ‘’I have to agree, your sheets do smell better after I’ve been in them. My expensive perfume doesn’t smell like sweaty balls.’’
Cregan cracked a smile, his eyes flashing with amusement. ‘’My sheets does not smell like sweaty balls.’’
They didn’t.
‘’But they do smell better when you’re there,’’ he added, his voice low and his eyes never leaving yours.
You tried to resist his charm and him, but he was just too good at working his way back into your good graces. With that irresistible northern accent, he’d flirt his way out of anything, his words always smooth and a little too convincing. And when he looked at you with those soft, pleading eyes and that crooked, boyish smile… Staying mad wasn’t exactly an option.
You leaned to kiss him, but before your lips could touch, Jace’s voice came from the hallway, asking Cregan about getting food.
‘’Oh, Sorry. I didn’t know you had a girl over,’’ he said, pausing in the doorway when he spotted the two of you. It was clear he’d interrupted something, hence why he apologized.
‘’No just a girl. My girl,’’ Cregan corrected, making you smile.
—
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#cregan stark#cregan stark x reader#cregan x reader#house of the dragon#hotd cregan#modern cregan stark
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hi baby !!! lover here omfg i've been GONE for months life has been so hectic but i just wanted to drop by and say a lil hi and give u a lil kiss on the cheek. i hope you're doing well. how are ur tamagochi? are u drinking enough water? what have i missed baby tell me everything
-lover
hi sweetpea, it’s lovely to hear from you again <3 i’m sorry life has been hectic for you, i sincerely hope you are doing wonderful irregardless <33 hehe i appreciate u dropping by and sending ur love!!! ♡(˃͈ દ ˂͈ ༶ ) aaaaah uhhh i am not doing well unfortunately ._. my father’s health is rapidly declining all of a sudden, he’s fallen three times in the past two days, he was taken to the hospital where they ran a bunch of tests and scans and are pretty sure he has fluid build up deep in the cavities of his brain but we are waiting for more information from a specialist. it’s all very stressful and very scary and my whole family is extremely worried. i’ve barely been eating and i haven’t been sleeping well and i’ve been on the verge of tears all day every day and it’s all just Not Good
#just an overall not good situation#we don’t know what’s happening but things are getting worse so quickly and it’s really concerning and scary#😣😣😣#i’m fearing for the worst but i really hope that isn’t the case#my dad is really scared as well#according to my mom he’s been crying a lot#it’s not looking well#but anyway sweet lover thank you for stopping by <3#i hope you’re doing lovely bb <333 even if life has been hectic!!!#i am sending you all the love and health in the whole world <3#lover.anon#clari gets mail
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☆ erm, let's not do that ☆
requested by anon! Hi there! So i would like to request The overblot gang with a S/O who likes to pick on their fingers whenever they are stressed and considering what Yuu have to go through, they would have a bloody hand if it werent for the fact they use gloves when they are really stressed out. (They dont wear gloves often because it will look weird when it doesnt fit the outfit but will wear it if necessary). So what are the overblot gang (seperate) reactions when he learns why his S/O pick on their fingers and wear gloves? P.s. you are an amazing writer and i love your work, keep up the good work! Hope you have a lovely day/night!
a/n so it's been awhile... how have you guys been? i've been okay, been dealing with post graduation fatigue and depression. been wondering what the hell am i doing with my world and wondering if things are really worth it. i miss bts, i miss jin and hobi and most of all yoongi. i miss the person i used to be. i miss the person that was my rock for a good few years. i wish this whole life thing wasn;t so hard, but! twst makes my brain go brrrr, so that's good i guess lolol. i'm working on stuff dw! and i'll try to post more, so thank you all so much to those who have been waiting! i love you all!!! <333
characters mentioned: overblot boys!
!tw! blood, would this be considered self harm? (an actual question btw)
Riddle Rosehearts <3
⋆ He’s so concerned. Honestly, when he saw the state of your hands, he gasped like some Victorian man seeing an ankle for the first time.
⋆ He’s not the type to beat around the bush, but he’s gentle about it. He’s quick to voice his concern for your health and if there’s any way for him to help you.
⋆ Knowing that he is part of the cause of your pain, sorta sends him spiraling somewhat. It really makes Riddle want to become a better person after seeing the after effects of his tyranny.
⋆ Whenever Riddle sees you picking at your hands, he kinda swats at your hands like an angry cat. A disappointed pout on his soft features. He really tries okay.
⋆ Riddle will patch your hand up. He’s so gentle about it too. Holding your hands as if they were blessed by the Queen of Hearts (honestly there’s probably a rule about it)
⋆ He’s taken to holding your hand when you're together. He stutters out a quick ‘I-it’s to help you!’ before dragging you away to study. When you're alone, Riddle has the habit of kissing your hands, mumbling sweet words.
⋆ Overall, Riddle is concerned but willing to do anything to help you.
“If you ever find the urge to harm yourself, no matter how small, I ask you to seek me out. I will always spare you a moment. Afterall, I care about you, please don’t forget that.”
Leona Kingscholar <3
⋆ He noticed the state of your hands the moment he met you, but didn’t mention it until you grew closer. Like Riddle, he doesn’t beat around the bush. But unlike Riddle, Leona is so incredibly blunt.
⋆ After you tell him it’s a habit you’ve picked up after certain events, Leona drops the subject. The both of you are too awkward to keep it going. Afterall, you both knew what events could have led you here. Guilt was quick to snag Leona’s heart.
⋆ He’s not upfront about his emotions. Leona’s quite bad with vocalizing his worries, but he’s always been a firm believer in actions over words anyways.
⋆ Expensive gloves, creams and ointments from his land, heck even fidget toys he’s seen Cheka play with, shows up at your door. Anything he believes that could help you, he’s getting.
⋆ If you’re together and your hands get particularly bad, he’s dragging you to the infirmary to patch you up (he ends up snagging/buying bandages to keep on him just in case after) He doesn’t really talk much, but the sentiment is there.
⋆ Like Riddle, Leona will hold your hands to stop you from picking at your skin. His grip is tight, but not in a way that seems like he’s scolding you or mad, but tight in a way that's comforting. As if saying ‘I’m here.’
‘Oi, stop that… Yeah, I’m aware, but I’m here now. Let’s find other ways to deal with your stress, yeah? (whispering) I think I’ve got a few ideas, if you’re up to it, herbivore~’
Azul Ashengrotto <3
⋆ He beats around the bush. Azul is weirddddd about it.
⋆ On one hand, he’s worried about you. On the other hand, his capitalist side wants to find some way to profit off it. Somehow he manages to quell both sides. (he ends up making hand cream/ointment using like floyd’s mucus thing, rip floyd)
⋆ Azul, despite his incessant need to bottle up his emotions for others, finds it hard to ignore the state of your hands, and likewise state of your health, any longer. He doesn’t know how to approach the topic. Does he ask right away? Should he ease you into it? He, for the first time since his overblot, is lost for words.
⋆ He does eventually get the guts to ask and oh boy, he never knew guilt felt this bad.
⋆ Azul kinda sucks at helping you, he won’t hold your hand (only in private) and he’s kinda frivolous with money (so no expensive gifts) but he’s good with his words. And when he sees you starting to pick at your hands, he immediately starts running his mouth. And he can talk for hours. And he’s entertaining too. Leaving you so enraptured by his words that you forget about the need to pick at your skin.
⋆ He’s always good at always keeping you busy. And no this isn’t some way to get free labor out of you. Typically you help him with paper work, just you and him in his little office.
⋆ Azul may always be boasting about how kind he is outloud, but you both know his true kindness is always quiet.
‘Ah, that’s enough paperwork for today. How about we go to the lounge for a few drinks? There’s plenty more I wish to share with you about the stock market.’
Jamil Viper <3
⋆ He doesn’t notice until you’re hissing in pain from something spicy touching your tender skin (listen i know this does make sense, but trust me, it hurts) He’s confused and worried at first and confused and worried after.
⋆ Jamil scolds you for working without some sort of protection while he tenderly washes your hands.
⋆ I feel like Jamil also has some bad coping habits, so he’s quick to put two and two together. He doesn’t ask, but there is a noticeable shift in his behavior. Jamil is a lot more gentle, not in a demeaning way, but in an awkward ‘I want to help you, but idk how, just please appreciate my efforts’ sorta way.
⋆ Since he still has his duties as Vice Housewarden and Kalim’s aid, he’s pretty tight on time, but he tries his best to spare you a few minutes. And if he can’t, you’ll always find a lunch box sitting on your desk.
⋆ Jamil is always willing to bandage your hands if they get particularly bad. He’ll use healing ointment that smells like home and is as gentle as his voice.
⋆ And while he can’t give you extraordinary gifts or talk for hours on end, Jamil is always ready to lend you a hand to heal your own destruction like how you healed him.
‘Stop squirming so much, I’ll mess up your banadages. -sigh- You really have to start wearing some sort of gloves… Mh? What was that?… You like it when I bandage your hand? E-eh- ahem, well if you like it so much, I might as well start charging you. …Ahaha, I never said thuarmarks, did I?”
Vil Schoenheit <3
⋆ He takes one look at your hand and instantly brings out a 12 step hand routine.
⋆ Listen, he doesn't care if you do it out of stress, he’s going to fix your hands while helping you find better ways to handle it.
⋆ He rubs like this gel liquid thing that tastes bad to prevent you from biting away the skin near your nail (it’s an actual thing don’t worry) He’s pulling all the stops to prevent you from injuring your hands even more than they already are.
⋆ Vil often walks the fine line of being really gentle or really strict about it. And it doesn’t stem from his perfection issues, he is just kinda bad at expressing his emotions in a way that is both productive and compassionate. He does care, you’ll just have to look for hidden meanings in his long lectures.
⋆ No doubt, Vil is getting both of you matching gloves with your signature colors as accents.
⋆ The whole 12 step hand routine actually does become routine for the both of you. Typically taking place at Pomefiore, you’ll both talk about your day. Vil sees this as a way to check off all three boxes.
⋆ He gets to do his nightly hand routine.
⋆ You're improving day by day from talking about your emotions with him.
⋆ And he gets to spend one on one time with you!
⋆ It's a win-win situation! And your hands have never been softer!
‘And Epel just had to prove his point, which ended up with him casting a Zip Tight Spell on him. Despite not even being able to move his mouth, I could tell there was so much anger running though his little body. Goodness, how ridicu-hm? Did my little spudling fall asleep? How rude~ -sigh- Sweet dreams, darling~’
Idia Shroud <3
⋆ It’s Ortho that brings up your problem. Worry evident in his voice as he showed pictures of your hands to his big brother.
⋆ Despite being gaming buddies, Idia really never paid attention to your outer appearance. Too preoccupied in his desire to beat you at every game you both play.
⋆ And poor Idia, guilt grabs him by his long ass hair and flings his lanky body across the room multiple times (not really, but in Idia’s head that what's happening)
⋆ Unlike all of the others mentioned, Idia’s way of help is rather unconventional. He’s not good at talking nor is he good at physical touch, but you know what he is good at? Yeah, making things.
⋆ After a long night, Idia shows up at Ramshackle holding a small box. What is in the box? Well your own personal health robocat! This cat is kinda like Ortho just to a lesser degree (think of the robocat seven made mc!)
⋆ Listen, he knows he’s severely lacking in multiple departments of this whole dating, heck even friend, thing, but he is trying! And RoboCat is the ultimate form of his love! It’s quite romantic really.
⋆ Is Grim happy about the new intruder? No! But your health is more important than his feelings!
⋆ Idia swears he died of pure happiness at your expression. His two favorite things together!? Eek! It’s too much!
‘A-and next time you find yourself in trouble, just c-call for Robocat and she’ll come flying!… A laser beam like Ortho? Good idea! I’ll make sure to add it in her name update!’
Malleus Draconia <3
⋆ His heart aches to see the pain you put yourself through. If it was up to him, he’d simply whisk you away to a place where no stress could muddle your beautiful mind. If he could, he would kill stress itself.
⋆ But alas, he can’t kill something that doesn’t have a physical form, how sad~ (lilia had to convince him not to go after Crowley)
⋆ Malleus is doing everything he can to help you. Just name it and he’s doing it.
⋆ Multiple gloves made of the finest materials? Got it!
⋆ Healing ointment from the farthest land made from an extinct organism? Done!
⋆ The heads of your enemies? Why didn’t you say so sooner!
⋆ He’s so silly ahahaha.
⋆ But seriously, Malleus sorta never feels stressed (he does, just thinks stress is a human emotion that only humans can feel) but he’s always willing to listen to you. Afterall, you’re always willing to lend your ears to him, it’s the bare minimum.
⋆ Advice? It’s so-so, sometimes he comes off vague but that really just because of his faeness. But he tries and is actively trying to be better, trying to be more intune with your emotions and his. (lilia has been great help, and surprisingly enough, watching silver and sebek on a more friendly level has also helped him be more in tune with emotions)
⋆ You shouldn't have to suffer in silence and he’ll make sure you never will for as long as the universe will let him.
‘You’ve been such a good companion, my dearest child of man, so please let me return the favor. Allow me to see the deepest parts of your soul, of your mind and heart. If you fear that I will cast judgment, do not. I could never judge the soul that has welcomed me with an open heart.’
#riddle rosehearts x reader#riddle x reader#leona kingsholar x reader#leona x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul x reader#jamil viper x reader#jamil x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#vil x reader#idia shroud x reader#idia x reader#malleus draconia x reader#malleus x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#mari writes!!!#tw self harm
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Ik you said this ages ago and in the tags of a post, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on Rüdeger and his mental health
anon i'm down on one knee proposing rn thank you for sending this in
stray thoughts and ramblings (sorry if this is messy, it's getting to 6 am and i have Not slept):
i'm really curious as to how his identity interacts with his faith. from my understanding, monasteries were intended to be safe havens away from the secular world (my notes from a course on early mediaeval monasticism call them "a place where a life similar to that of the angels takes place, a harbour of calm that resists the storms of the world of outside") - and so he's in this space that's meant to be separated from "sin" but at the same time, he's living in it through his identity* and relationship (at least according to the institution he's a part of). i'd love to know how he views himself, the church, the concept of sin in the first place - like obviously he's terrified of anyone finding out about them, but from memory it's expressed more so as worry over mathieu? which in turn makes me wonder if that's because he's at peace with his own fate due to self-deprecating reasons and so doesn't bother worrying about himself (i'm sinful and will go to hell regardless but mathieu deserves better) or if he thinks there's nothing sinful about their relationship in the first place (and so persecuting mathieu, the man he loves, over it, is unfathomable and unfair) [*i'm aware that the concept of queerness as an identity is more contemporary, but i couldn't think of a better word]
also curious as to how he ended up at kiersau. we don't know his backstory - how'd he end up becoming a monk? did something happen to drive him towards it? is there a precedent for him running away from things (if andreas blackmails him and mathieu, he leaves, i think to protect mathieu)? inquiring minds would like to know
hc time: i think that the town turning on them in act II feels that much more terrifying because while they're not persecuting him because of his queerness, it's entirely likely that they/others would, if their relationship was revealed. so the whole thing is like a manifestation of his worst fears. no wonder he's upstairs having a panic attack
SPEAKING OF. anxiety girlie who gets panic attacks and self-soothes by singing. and i'm sure mathieu's presence calms him (doubly so because mathieu's probably the only person in his life who gets it. who understands him. who sees him without that act of perceiving being judgemental)
another question: what does rüdeger himself think of his mental health issues? we have the language to describe it now, with modern terms, but - and not to paint with a broad stroke - a 16th century monk probably wouldn't necessarily internalise something like a panic attack as being a health issue, but rather a spiritual affliction. which brings me back to wondering how he thinks of himself, and of god, and if it's possible he views his issues as a divine punishment (like how some fundies describe depression as like. being something given to them by the devil? that they can pray away?)
in my self-indulgent hc, he feels better after leaving kiersau. mathieu getting a big promotion probably brings new anxieties but at the same time, makes them just a bit more untouchable. also, if andreas was not an asshole about discovering them in the library, i feel that'd give him an opportunity to see that people can be good and understanding about him/them (though i also have a feeling that rüdeger is the type of person to believe the best about people, at least when's he's not actively spiralling. mathieu does describe him as "a gentle soul" and "a kind and thoughtful man")
that's all i have for now. i love him and mathieu so much, they deserve everything <3
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Fic authors self-rec! ✨ When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers.
<3 Wow, since I've been writing fanfics for years, I have so many to choose from. But let me stick to my reader-insert-focused darker fics that I post on this account.
1:
The Man Who Claimed To Be Yours – Fandom: Joker 2019, Pairing: Arthur Fleck/Joker x (Female) Reader. Explicit with lots of warnings. By far my proudest (and smuttiest?) work.
By far a number one position. Not only do you people seem to love it, I have received so many messages of readers going back to the story for the umpteenth time to reread it all. (And you have no diea how those little messages strengthened me when my health abandoned me). You devour it. And even I have been rereading my own tale several times and enjoyed it. So yes, I definitely want to write an ending to it. I also have plans to have the full story out before Joker 2 comes out.
Fun fact: The entire fic was inspired by the gif I added above)
2:
Pine Cone Child – Fandom: Enola Holmes, Pairing: Enola Holmes/Linthorn (one-sided & Noncon), Enola Holmes & Sherlock Holmes. Explicit with lots of warnings.
I got a big thrill sending these chapters out into the world and found myself on a roll with this fic. The idea came with one scene, of a boy meeting his biological father, and realizing that he had a far more gritty past than he always had assumed. But to get to that chapter, I had to write many more. In the end, that chapter was never posted online. And the chapters I had finished about Enola and her mother visiting Linthorn’s grave and the chapter that was to follow after got lost when my laptop crashed. I was also too ill and too tired to write, so it never reached its end. I am not sure if I will ever finish this one. I think, it is pretty okay as it is. Even if I never got to the ending the whole idea sprouted from in the first placed. For now, it is on hold.
3. Removed Fics/Or old account fics:
The first multi-chapter fic became a success, many years ago. I will not name the title, the quality is shite compared to what I write now (still shite, but different shite). One of the first fandoms I wrote fanfiction in was Inu Yasha. The much-explored ‘Inu Yasha scampers off with Kikyo and Kagome finds comfort in Sesshoumaru’s arms’ was still new, there were about 20 fics or so about this pairing in English. The encouragement I received made me want to keep posting my work. I still receive reviews for these fics.
4. A deleted Sweeney Todd Smut fic, featuring Sweeney Todd x Lovett’s daughter. I might reupload this one day, perhaps as a reader insert.
But because I want to tag a tale: Have you tried reading my dark romance (aka, Reader let yourself be kidnapped by a slasher guy) The Chance to Make A Change. Fandom: The Black Phone. Pairing: Albert Shaw ( The Grabber ) x (f) Reader. Explicit. Loads of warnings.
Shared 5:
His – Fandom: Moon Knight, Pairing: Dr. Arthur Harrow x (f) Reader. Mature with warnings.
I am surprised by how much feedback and likes I received on this, even if the numbers of hits and kudos on AO3 are low. But for the short tale it is, I like it. Because it shows a budding relationship over time, cut into short chapters, and has a little evil twist at the end of it. Also, I could totally live with this happening to me, if I were the reader.
Shared 5:
No Family Man – Fandom: Joker 2019, Pairing: Arthur Fleck/Joker x (afab) Reader. Mature with warnings.
Another one of my fics I love to return to, and that was generally received well. It started as two imagines which I then combined. It has lots of personal experience elements in it that to me, make it all the more special. What they are, I will leave for you to guess.
I would love to finish the Princess and the Clown - Joker 2019 fanfic of Arthur Fleck/Joker x Reader I once started. Perhaps rewrite it a little. Same for my Benvolio x Mercutio Hanahaki Story (you Shakespearean lovers might know me of my many Tybalt x Mercutio and Mercutio x basically anyone fics).
I have a few Star Wars Reader Inserts that were never finished but tickle my fancy. Mostly Reader x Kylo Ren or Reader x Hux (or both lol).
By far most of my proudest fanfics have been personal gifts to friends. It is how I started writing when in High School, and I still gift fics for people's birthdays. I especially like the Sherlock Holmes range I did for several friends, in which my friends always ended up being the evil masterminds who outsmarted Sherlock and Watson. But also, because I had illustrations to go along with these fics. <3
But first, I need to finish a whole list of unfinished works: starting with a Crimson Peak inspired modern reader au that has been pending for over 2 years, as well as the Joker fic mentioned on number one. Then there's a summery romantic Arthur Harrow x Reader tale I want to gift to someone on here, and a Harrow Patient x Reader fic that wants to be written in between.
ARGH!
Not to mention the many Arthur Fleck x Reader prompts I have pending. I LOVE YOU, KEEP SENDING ME STUFF <3
#personal note#Arthur Fleck#Arthur Harrow#Albert Shaw#Enola Holmes#Sweeney Todd#Inu Yasha#Sesshoumaru x Kagome#Reader inserts#Fanfiction rec
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˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆ ⠀⠀⠀ YOU’RE WATCHING : WHAT HAPPENED TO ASTELLA? / A BRIEF HISTORY OF BUBBLE ENTERTAINMENT !
ib. : @anqelblccm & midnight theories on yt !
final word count : 0.495k
warning(s) : talks of bullying and harassment, but that’s really it tbh
`✦ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ INTRO !
❝ if you don’t know who promise is, you might be living under a rock. you could say they’re the queens of nugudom, having rocketed themselves into fame while only being a four year old group. but as of a few months ago, both the group and their company are under fire for what seems that their main vocalist ASTELLA had suddenly been kicked out of the group for unknown reasons, which have now come into light of what actually happened. ❞
`✦ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ ⠀⠀⠀ WHO IS PROMISE AND ASTELLA ?!
❝ for those kpop fans that haven’t heard about the PROMISE or ASTELLA, the group debuted back in 2017, as a five-membered girl bgroup with the members astella, jihyun, kyungmi, jade, and lily. they debuted under an unknown company called BUBBLE ENTERTAINMENT, who we will be getting to later. they debuted with a classic among kpop stans who like small groups, tell me, but didn’t get traction until the release of peek-a-boo, which got them a lot of fame with international fans, basically they were on top of the world, looking at their success from a point of view that a group from a small company were getting their flowers and the fame they deserved, so it came to everyone’s surprise, when during the last leg of chill kill promotions, their company put out a statement saying that heejin ( astella ) would be on hiatus due to ‘ mental health ‘ which we find out later on that the reason was not only because of mental health. ❞
`✦ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ ⠀⠀⠀ THE LAWSUIT !
❝ last year, during october, astella finally broke her silence with a post on instagram, it was a picture of all five of the girls, stating “hello to my darling 신자 ( faithfuls , promise’s fandom name ) i know that my departure from the group was abrupt, but it was the best thing that i could do for me. i love the girls and you all dearly, and i will never forget them or you all. I want nothing more than to see promise continue to succeed and i am rooting for my girls :). i have endured bullying and harassment, not from my members, but from the staff, and when i tried bringing it up to the higher ups my pleas and calls for help were ignored. i talked about it to my family, and they told me the best thing that i could do was to leave the group and the company as a whole. i hope you continue to support me if i do decide to redebut. please do not send any hurtful messages to my members, they are very kind and have treated me amazing since our debut. but yeah, heejin <3.” after she posted that, articles were made left and right asking the company to come forward and speak about the speculated bullying that astella claimed to be happening. ❞
❝ next, in December, astella officially filed a lawsuit against bubble entertainment and her ex- manager, who’s name is not mentioned in the lawsuit. astella claimed that her ex-manager was the root of all the bullying, she said “our manager would purposefully exclude and ignore me from anything that had to do with the group, she would say rude and hurtful things to me and when confronted, she would gaslight me, making me feel like i was in the wrong, but not to the other members. I don’t know what i did to be treated this way, but I know that i only treated her with kindness and respect, seeing that she’s my senior and i was always taught to respect my seniors”. she also said that when her group leader, kyungmi, also brought up the mistreatment astella was facing to the higher ups, they did nothing, and instead continued to allow her to act this way with astella, and this is the kicker, apparently the manager did end up getting fired, but that was only after astella l eft. ❞
`✦ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ ⠀⠀⠀ ABOUT BUBBLE ENTERTAINMENT !
❝ bubble entertainment kickstarted their company in 2014, fairly new to the company and only ever had trainees. the only group they’ve debuted is Promise, who later changed their name to Paradise in 2022, after member Astella left the group, and 2021 was the last year we saw Astella promote with promise. it was said that before debuting Promise, there was a whole different lineup, that only had Astella and Kyungmi in it, seeing as their positions in the group were main and lead singers. ❞
❝ also, side note, it has been rumored that all the members of Paradise will be terminating their contracts with Bubble, saying that they have come to a negotiation with the girls, letting them keep their group name, but will no longer be in the company. ❞
❝ now that the video is over, i wish nothing but prosperity and happiness for both Astella and Paradise, now that Astella is now in Starship, and Paradise are rumored to be leaving Bubble Entertainment, they can finally be somewhere where they are respected. ❞
#◟ ⋆ ◟ ⋆ 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗 𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 › heejin kwan !#◟ ⋆ 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗 𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 › promise/paradise !#◟ ⋆ 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗 𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 › youtube !#◟ ⋆ 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗 𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 › fan made !#◟ ⋆ ◟ ⋆ 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗 𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 › writings !#fictional idol community#fictional idol oc#kpop oc#fake kpop addition#fake kpop gg#fake kpop girl group#fake kpop group#fake kpop member#fake kpop oc#fictional kpop community#fictional kpop idol#fictional kpop oc#fictional idol group#fake kpop soloist#fake kpop company#fake kpop idol#fake oc
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Hi hi. My name is Buddy or you can call me KJ. My pronouns are He/Him/His. I am Autistic and an ADHDer; I also have CPTSD. I regress to cope with this as well as my other chronic health conditions (Multiple Sclerosis,diabetes T1 & Glioma) and it’s also a part of my personality.
I’m an age regressor and pet regressor- Both SFW. My Big Age: 26. Little Age: 3-6 years old; 8-10 occasionally. Petre- Puppy. I have a CG and I call her Bubby or Mommy. She’s my fiancée and I’m really happy I get to do this whole life thing with her. She’s amazing. 🥰 My personal Tags are:#buddysbarks & #Dinopupsroars
A Little bit about me:
Favorite Food: Chicken nuggets -Dino Shaped and Mac n Cheese
Favorite Season: Autumn/Fall 🎃
Favorite Stuffed Animals: My Squishable Gargoyle, Raphael & My Sneki Snek Plushie, (Pictured Above 😄)
Favorite Animal: Penguins
Favorite Colour: Blue and Green
Favorite TV Shows: Bluey, Octonauts,Adventure Time,Winnie the Pooh,Mickey Mouse Clubhouse,Danny Phantom,Teen Titans,What’s New Scooby Doo and many more
Favorite Movies: Bolt the Super Dog,Wall•e, Happy Feet, Scooby Doo, Scooby Doo: The Legend of the Vampire, Scooby Doo: Zombie Island and The Nightmare Before Christmas
Favorite Games: Animal Crossing,Stardew Valley, Little Friends: Dogs & Cats,Mario Kart & Super Mario World 3D : Bowsers Fury
Favorite Place to Feel Safe: In my bedroom, I like being snuggled under my weighted blanket and with my weighted dinosaur plushie, Tate, and my starry night nightlight on
Pets: I have three dogs: Titus,Dex and Ace. Titus is a Rottweiler, Dex is a Belgian Malinois & Ace is a Cane Corso- they’re all big boys and very cuddly
My regressed interests include : Coloring,drawing,watching cartoons & Disney movies. I like going to museums since I like learning about dinosaurs and space. And I like going for walks with Bubby and playing handball and soccer. I love plushies,fidget toys and art/crafts.
So yeah. That’s a bit about me.:3 Now to the most important part of this post:
DNI: Please please please Do Not Interact N$FW/ABDL/DDLG or any blog you would not show to a kid! DNI: If you are anti-lgbtqia+,You’re an NSFW account/ sexualizer of Agere, racist,sexist,map,zoo,etc.
DNI: If you are going to bring hate here.
Thank you for reading! :3 I’m open to chatting with people- I tend to be shy but I warm up a bit once I get past my shy and awkward beginnings. Feel free to message me or send me an ask. :D I may not answer right away as this is my second blog but I try to check back in pretty regularly. I hope you have a great day and stay safe kiddos! 🦖🐶🩵
#intro post#pinned post#sfw interaction only#sfw regression#sfw agere#sfw petre#sfw cglre#sfw little boy#littledinopup#buddysbarks#dinopupsroars
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thank you for making me feel better abt sending u so many asks🫶
also I acc LOVE the idea of a disgruntled english teacher at lunch that's wild but so accurate
thanks for that shaynse shout out absolutely so giddy now🫡
Also was wondering how u would match up the smoshcast with Taylor albums?
Some of my ideas (more vibes then lyrics):
Red - Amanda (maybe its the scarves)
1989 - Angela
Reputation - Arasha
Folklore - Ian
Evermore - Tommy
Midnights - Courtney
BONUS I think if shaynse were an album they'd be evermore (based off vibe alone, not necessarily lyrics)
EXTRA BONUS if shaynse were an artist they would be cigarettes after sex
(Would love to hear what albums/artists you associate with spommy and any other ships too)
-shaynse anon
absolutely any time!! honestly Thank You for sending so many asks these are always the highlights of my day i hope you all know.
NSDKLNFLKRNKL thank you so much. i feel like i just open my ask box like its my office door and i see six asks lined up in the hallway every morning and sigh and invite the kids in to eat. does this make sense. in no way do i want to be a fandom mom BUT a fandom english teacher all the gay kids think is cool? yeah okay i can get behind that
literally any time im incorporating it into asks now why? bc you're an icon and i love it
OH MY GOD YOUR MIND.... this is god tier thinking. tbh all of your takes are Perfect i couldn't have said it better myself. debut is so kimmy to me (idet i have to explain that one), fearless... fearless is tough... maybe damien??, speak now is jackie (it's My favorite album i get to gift it to one of My favorite cast members), and my hot take is that shayne IS lover. look at that mf. he's so lover coded. and then i agree with ALL of your ops. (folklore ian hits SO hard btw for no reason)
oh i LOVE that. willow.......... cowboy like me........ long story short...... i am seeing the vision here
i have never listened to a cigarettes after sex song but now im gonna have to omg
okay here are my off-the-cuff takes (i put them under the cut bc as always it got away from me):
spommy: 1989. i link them Inextricably with you are in love, style, new romantics, slut... they could be Any of these albums though tbh so this one is hard but yeah i think this one vibes the hardest for them
shaymien: LOVERRRR i will stand by this one forever and ever!! lover, daylight, ITS NICE TO HAVE A FRIEND.... oh my god. OHHHH my god.
amangela: red - they are giving stay, stay, stay, they are giving starlight, they are giving message in a bottle. extremely silly lil guys, very upbeat and high-energy, this album is for them
courtivia: they are midnights bc 1. hot girl bling they are both bejeweled and making the whole world shimmer 2. lavender haze and snow on the beach are them tyvm for coming to my tedtalk
shackie: they can have the honor of speak now. bc i like them <3 KLDFNFN no but also bc 'mine' but like. shayne pov. you made a rebel of a careless man's reckless son!!! enchanted. ours. i can see you. i literally could go on but i won't and save us all some headache LMAO
kimney: soupy said they were early taylor the other day and i SO agree with her. im going debut... smth smth im only me when im with you and our song !!
jamien: fearless... smth about the classic love story vibe that album gives off is SO them. honestly even just love story alone makes this their album. but today was a fairytale, hey stephen... yeah very that
arangela: they get to be my OTHER fave, reputation, and here is why: reputation reads as very Newly but Deeply in love to me, like the feeling is fresh and exciting but still grounding, and that is how they read to me. gorgeous is for them, end game is for them, but dress is REALLY for them.
ianthony: FOLKLORE im feeling ill just thinking about it. seven.... august..... OH MY GOD INVISIBLE STRING? im honestly on the floor about this one. i feel like a woman who was told to go rest in the countryside for her health.
#shipping#ask#asks#anon#anonymous#shaynse anon#shaynse#ianthony#arangela#jamien#kimney#shackie#courtivia#amangela#shaymien#spommy#long post
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❤️🧡🤍🩷💜A WLW ASK MEME❤️🧡🤍🩷💜 List the top 10 ladies you’ve been obsessed with Ever Of All Time! Then send this on to 5 sapphic mutuals 👩❤️💋👩
Yes, fun! :D Thank you!!
Okay, I went fictional characters with this because I just don't really get obsessed with RL people outside of like a 5 year period between 2005-2010 where I followed select actors around to other shows. Also, there's only three ladies who I can confirm fit both 'obsessed' and 'ever of all time', so I've trudged through my entire childhood for every fictional lady who's helped shape my personality to round out the list.
In Chronological Order (to me not by air date):
Margaret Houlihan (M*A*S*H) -- Oh MASH reruns on the Hallmark channel, my beloved 💚 Now, I'm primarily talking about the juicy middle seasons after Potter took over command and Loretta Swit was able to wrestle some better storylines for Margaret, but there's some gems in the early years too. I've been drawn back to MASH three times as an adult and each time I get sucked deeper and deeper into both the real life history of the Korean War and the fictional character of Margaret. Do I have a thousand and one headcanons for how she handles life after the war? Yes. Am I obsessed with whatever platonic/sexual relationship she's got going on with Hawkeye? Yes. Have I plotted out what her D&D character might look like? YEP! She's a paladin :P I also believe if you examined her character through a queer lens, you'd find a trans man rather than a queer woman, but your mileage may vary.
AndrAIa (ReBoot) -- Yeah, yeah, yeah it's a cartoon, but bb 11 year old me was absolutely OBSESSED with this show, and AndrAIa was a big part of that. Look at her little capital AI in her name! 😭 25 years before corporate greed ruined the acronym, that AI was adorable!! And very clever given that she was an NPC game sprite who decided to leave her game and live as a real sprite. Her whole existence and vibe was very formative for me. I love her.
Harley Davidson Cooper (Guiding Light) -- Yes, her full name is absolutely necessary, even if no one ever used it. So, I was SUUUCH a CBS soap girlie back around 2000-2002, and I've been very nostalgic for it in the last few years. As the World Turns was my primary soap, so I figured one of my regular blorbos like Rose or Katie or Romana would be the one I miss most. But then Harley's actress Beth Ehlers popped up during my Law & Order SVU watch and I LOST MY MIND!!!!! Her face and voice instantly filled my soul with joy! So Harley gets the trophy. Even if she didn't have any stand out storylines during that era (apart from her and Gus being Very Hot), she was always my favorite character from GL.
Piper Halliwell (Charmed, original flavor) -- Technically, I had Turtle Wexler from the book The Westing Game on this list instead because I didn't remember Piper until after I'd drafted all ten slots :S But listen! That's because health problems have made my memory shitty! It is not because Piper doesn't stand up to the test of time! Ugh, I remember the show never treated Piper like she was the fan favorite and I hadn't discovered online TV forums yet so I felt so alone in my love for her :( But being on lesbian millennial Tumblr makes 14 year old me feel SO validated, because Piper is the only Halliwell sister anyone ever talks about on my dash. 💜 Congrats everyone. We were right all along.
Lorelai Gilmore (Gilmore Girls) -- Yeeeaaah.. we've hit the Big Three that I alluded to earlier. I was very, very gay for Lorelai (and Lauren Graham) in the latter half of my high school years, and I did not realize that until way later. She taught me how to be quicker with the comebacks and, more importantly, to marry someone who could cook instead of learning how to feed yourself. And I really took that to heart. My spouse is a fantastic cook! :) (Don't get scared for me guys! I do actually know how to cook three (3) entire meals now that I'm in my 30s :P lol)
Rose Tyler/Billie Piper (Doctor Who) -- I will list the actress here, because my love for Rose Tyler is probably split 50/50 between the character herself, and Billie Piper's charisma and hotness. She's gorgeous!!! 😍 That seemingly common question in the mid-2000s of 'Who would you kiss if you were gay?' always left me stumped until New Who aired in the states. Then, I was finally able to answer 'Billie Piper' and actually mean it. Because that's what you were supposed to do with that question, right? Take it seriously and not treat it like hyperbole? #totallystraightbehavior #swearsies Alas, it would take me two more girl crushes and interacting with genuine queer women in a femslash fandom before I recognized my feelings for what they were. But Rose was still a very significant step forward!
Myka Bering (Warehouse 13) -- MY GIRL!!! My Lady of all Ladies. I would die for her. I would kill for her. I would kneel and raise my sword and swear fealty to her. MYKA FUCKING BERING, EVERYONE! 👏👏👏👏 Watching her fall in love with Helena made me realize all my girl crushes were real crushes and that I was bi. Bless her. Bless Joanne Kelly. And bless the incomparable Bering and Wells fandom. *kisses everyone on the mouth, sloppy style*
Erin Gilbert (Ghostbusters 2016) -- Look, I know that I can never get away with pretending that Erin isn't my favorite ghostbuster, but I do usually think about her in the context of her relationships! Like 8 times out of 10, when I'm headcanoning, I'm thinking about her and Abby's relationship. And if I'm not, there's a not-so-small chance I'm thinking about her relationship with Patty instead. (RIP to Holtzy who I virtually never think about outside of the foursome. Her fanbase just ruined it for me :S) But um... yeah, Erin's my favorite. I even have Pokemon parties picked out for them all. And their daemons.
Eve (Lucifer) -- Okay so I know it hasn't even been a full high school (aka 4 years) since I met Eve, so I can't really say she's someone I'll stay obsessed with forever and ever and ever. You probably don't even believe I'm obsessed with her at all given the bulk of my Lucifer talk is about Lucifer/Chloe -- but that's just cause that's where the storyline is! Trust me, Eve is my favorite character, even if she was in the least amount of episodes (RIP me). When she pops up in the background of a Deckerstar fanvid, I'm instantly distracted and have to marathon every Maze/Eve vid in my collection. I decided to use a fandom name in the first time, like, ever, when creating my Lucifer-specific Twitter account and I made it Eve themed. She's my favorite, bestest girl who can do no wrong and -- YES! -- that does include accidentally-definitely-on-purpose starting a demon mutiny that led to newborn Charlie's kidnapping. She had never been dumped before okay? First woman to ever exist and she'd never been dumped. Did you handle your first break-up well? No! I didn't think so :P
Alex Cabot (Law & Order: SVU) -- I've only know Cabot for four months, but if anything happens to her, I'll kill everyone in this room and then myself -- OH WAIT! She already left me. 😭 I am in S17 now, which is like ten seasons past when she went into witness protection and barely ever came back, yet there's not an episode that goes by where I don't think about her. So, I say that counts as longevity and am sticking her on the list. This woman has Issues. Plural. Period. She makes me say shit like 'I want to dig into her brain with a fork' and it's actually an accurate metaphor for what I feel. I love her your honor... now who can I sue for emotional damages?
#cassiopeiasara#ask#about me#long post#because I am incapable of making a list without describing 50 percent of my thoughts#(yes that wall of text above is only half of my thoughts on the matter)#:S#now I have to figure out who hasn't received this ask game yet and send it to them...
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HI LEGEND
im a lurker from ao3 and obsessed with your works and even more obsessed finding ur tumblr,,,your characterization of suguru makes the world go round ok. he’s everything to me these days, thank you for blessing us with your wonderful writing<3. Everything about suguru is so warm and fuzzy and so good to his sweet baby 🥹.
(cw: dissociation) i feel like he would be so good to his angel that struggles w dissociation and keeps her grounded. always giving squeezes, notices the signs when it happens. he’d help you through it and be so comforting :( the way i would ugly sob if it happened fucking too LSDKSK. I hope all is well and giving you a big hug!
-🗿 anon
HELLO
This ask made me so happy! Hello lurker from archive of our own,, WAHH I’m so glad you like my work that really makes my week honestly. AND SUGURU,, yeah he means so much to me IDJXODJDOKDKD IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY CHARACTERIZATION OF HIM to Me I think he is a very soft boy, even in canon when he defected he still did it out of love,, i love writing him honestly. I also really like writing Gojo too though. I think I like writing Suguru because it makes me Flustered but I like writing Gojo cause I feel like our sense of humor is very similar. AND THANK YOU FOR BLESSING ME BY READING! Yes yes I concur he really is so sweet to his baby. In my Heart and Soul I just know he would melt for you and do anything for you. I think his love is very. Devotion based. He would devote his life to you, and that’s so sexy of him.
AND. You have no idea how I reacted to the second half of your ask, well I mean all of it but like. You are in my Head. I’ve actually thought about that at length with all my blorbos, but he takes up the biggest residence for that idea. I actually have one or two WIPs with poly satosugu where they care for you during a mental health episode, I don’t think any of them are dissociation but. I’ve never posted them just because it almost feels Too vulnerable,, but I struggle with dissociation. Like. Very badly. KDJKFDKKDKDJDJ I think the thing with Suguru is he would be so good for you during bad mental health episodes, cause he knows what it feels like. He’d be able to notice all the small details. But yes dissociation is a very interesting topic for him. I think Suguru as a whole is a very Grounded character, and I mean we kinda see that in the show how he keeps Gojo’s feet on the ground. You’re so right though he would absolutely try to keep you Here. And he wouldn’t make you feel weird about it. I feel like when I’m dissociating I feel. Crazy KNDKDKDKDK but I think he would be very in tune and calm and treat you Normally, except he always has a hand on you and helps you do grounding exercises. Maybe stands in front of you so you can See him while he holds your face :(( he also would step up. I think he’s dominant generally speaking but I think if he noticed you dissociating he would automatically do all the talking if other people were around and guide you places.
I HOPE ALL IS WELL WITH YOU TOO I AM SENDING YOU A BIG HUG WITH CHOCOLATE AND MAYBE A TEDDY BEAR
#asks#🗿#did you know you are my first emoji anon#it’s true#this ask really made me so happy you have no idea#I am so grateful to have people like you read my work#I think sometimes as a writer you can get into the habit of writing something and posting it then Thats it#but then you get comments from people and it’s like Oh. People are actually reading my work#and have thoughts about it#I am so glad we agree on the characterization of suguru#and the dissociation thought is so good I think I will be thinking about that for the next month#I also would sob hysterically if suguru took care of me#I think he takes care of you all the time but even more so during those times#he is so important to me#so is Gojo but we aren’t talking about him#I love thinking about characters taking care of you during times you’re having an episode#I find it very soothing#thank you for this ask#I can’t wait to write more for you and to see what you think#tw dissociation#tw mental illness
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Hi! I’d like some advice (it maybe very unusual to say this) but how can I detach my worth from my school grades? I’m going through a medical situation and I have professors that are super supportive and willing to help me. Meanwhile I’ve been dealing with a TA that’s been very rude, off putting and aggressive towards me the whole semester and even opt to have been get paper work to prove I was going through medical complications which disrupted my school work. I usually get good grades but it’s been tough due to what’s going on and she’s been grading my work. Recently she gave me a 70% on a paper I worked so so hard on. I was so devastated because my grade wasn’t that good and this dropped it lower. And it was so odd, I was confused and decided to email her why (I haven’t sent the email yet). I’m super emotional rn because I’ve been forcing myself to keep studying, (through my pain, recovery etc) and she’s been so so unsympathetic and cruel. She has a bad energy about her and she’s a grad student. I am so upset. And I don’t want to be so hard on myself because I did do my best.
Hi love! I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through these medical issues right now. It can't be an easy experience, especially while you're a university student. From what you've written, there seems to be something wrong with this TA's approach and behavior toward you. My suggestion would be to CC your professor on every email to this TA to ensure she takes accountability for her unfair harshness regarding your grades and performance. Having a separate chat with your professor on this matter might also be useful – if this situation isn't resolved without your professor's direct involvement in your conversations with the TA.
On an emotional level, I think one skill everyone needs to learn and internalize as they get older is to not take other people's actions personally unless there's a simple, logical reason as to why your behavior might be met with a harsh or intense reaction (e.g. you made fun of someone's appearance or dreams and they ghosted you, looked angry, or walked away). Most people's actions are a reflection of their inner worlds, how they see themselves, and the circumstances they're currently navigating. While understanding this doesn't resolve many conflicts, it helps you take your emotions out of the situation to assess logically how to best approach the situation. In return, you tend to think more clearly and display a calmer demeanor during a contentious interaction.
Regarding decoupling your academic performance from your self-worth, the best approach I've found (as someone whose clear top priority was my grades as a student, too) is to see your academic performance as a means to an end in pursuit of achieving your longer-term goals. Consider how earning a certain grade affects your future career or lifestyle goals for the first 2-3 years post-grad. If you're applying to a rigorous graduate program, making your grades a top priority makes sense as they will help you to get into the program responsible for helping you get placed in your ideal career (lawyer, doctor, etc.). If you're not planning on earning another degree, think about how well you truly need to do to get the job or experience desired in your chosen field. For the majority of people in the latter camp, having decent marks will not decrease the available opportunities in a given field.
Ultimately, though, making your health your #1 priority will always serve your best interest. Remember: You can always go back to school, retake an exam, or learn a new skill. But, medical-related issues can create chronic or lifelong issues that hinder all future successes or opportunities in certain areas of your life. You can't perform well if you have no energy, mental clarity, or optimal mobility. Choose your well-being. Every time.
Hope this helps. Sending you well wishes and good health xx
#femmefatalevibe#student life#college student#college advice#school advice#femme fatale#dark feminine energy#dark femininity#life skills#life lessons#life advice#it girl#high value woman#the feminine urge#female excellence#dream girl#high value mindset#queen energy#q/a#female power#higher self#healthylifestyle#self help#self healing#healing journey#healthy habits#self love#goal setting
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What's your opinion on each beach boy individually?
I adore this question, thank you.
Brian Wilson: My forever boy. Talented, funny, adorable, strong. When I was first getting into the Beach Boys, I was just mainlining Brian interviews and sobbing because of how much I related to him, and he made me feel like I could get through just about anything. His entire story, his outlook, is about finding joy in the simplest things in the darkest times. It's such a beautiful thing to see reflected in someone. I got to see him live a few years ago, and it was overwhelming to be in the same room with him and see so many people just thanking him for his music. I love how unapologetic he is about what he loves and how he expresses it. He puts so much of himself out there in his music that it just reaches through and grabs hold of your heart. It's unmistakably him, from the plaintive loneliness in Pet Sounds to the cheeky weirdness of Love You, because music was always his safe space and the best way he could express himself without anything between you and him. He brings me such joy.
Carl Wilson: An angel. Sweetest boy, sweetest voice, grew into a whole hottie. I feel like I am very close to him as well, we are both kind of conflict-averse and quiet leader types. His voice is magic, and I love the more R&B influence he brings to songs. Wild Honey is one of my favorite albums, and I feel like it has so much of him in it. He is so gentle in life but fiery in the studio, I don't know. I'm always so happy listening to him.
Dennis Wilson: Dennis' songwriting is so impressive to me, there's so much soul and emotion in his voice, and I love the rawness of his vocals paired with the lush, classical beauty of his instrumentation. He went through so much, and I wish he could have gotten more help and time to heal. All the Wilson brothers just break my heart. They deserved the world. (I forgot to say I got to sit in one of his cars at a museum! <3)
Al Jardine: Such a cinnamon roll. I trust him wholeheartedly, like, if Al isn't on your side or doesn't like you, then I don't like you either. He's so supportive and kind and it means so much to me that he and Brian are still so close.
Mike Love: So annoying and frustrating that it almost feels like parody. Every time I come around to him, I find out something else about him that sends me through the roof again! He just should not be around sensitive people, he is hazardous to their health, and sometimes he says things that I just--!!! Despite all that, I love his voice and "Big Sur" and I have an ironic love for how much he tries to shoehorn Transcendental Meditation into everything. Respect the grift! Also "Student Demonstration Time" slaps, I don't care!!!!!!
Bruce Johnston: He's fine. Some of his songs are almost too sweet for me. Points lost for touring with Mike.
David Marks: He got totally shafted early on and led a very hard life, but he is talented and a real sweetheart.
Blondie Chaplin: Such a fun guy! Points gained for touring with Brian.
Ricky Fataar: Really don't know anything about him, sorry. I have just recently gotten to listen to the albums he is on, so I don't know much.
John Stamos: Literally, why are you here. Go away.
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i’m reading your lovely jenate fanfic rn and one of the details i’ve really been enjoying is the way you characterize the sibling relationship between jenny and dan! and it has me wondering, more generally, how do you picture dan and jenny’s relationship playing out as adults? we don’t really get to see jenny post going to london on the actual show, and i’m curious how things might have changed or evolved between them with them both being on more equal relational footing, so to speak. (i also think i remember you mentioning here that you yourself have siblings, so as an only child i can imagine you probably have a much more nuanced picture of this than i do lol)
ohhhh thank you so much!!! this is something that I actually explore in the next chapter (posting forthcoming), but I'll talk about it now just to get ahead of that lol
I am thinking, in show canon -- and in the canon i construct in this au in which the show ends after Despicable B ;) -- that Jenny sort of...gives herself a clean break from all things New York, including Dan. and Dan, with all his abandonment issues, takes that harder than she probably sees at the time, but completely removing herself is what she needs the most in that moment. and then, a couple years later, they gravitate closer, but virtually.
with their work being so time-consuming and not really on the typical layman's schedule (like, writer and fashion designer lol what free time) they don't really have time to full on talk on the phone or facetime, but they text regularly, often over an inside joke or a link or a meme they need the other to see (because their partner wouldn't find it as funny)
I think Jenny as a grown up would find it easier to talk to Dan first about things over their parents, and vice versa, because their is this sibling kind of thing were no other person quite understands you the same way, and has known you this long and loved you this long. but the love is different from the love you feel with your parents. i'm not sure if this is entirely accurate...but the love feels...more unconditional somehow, because a sibling has more choice in loving you, but less failures of doing so.
and yes! I do have an older brother, our age difference (3 years) is slightly larger than Dan & Jenny's, but my relationship and experience with him informs - consciously and unconsciously - a LOT of how I write Jenny & Dan. Disclaimer: our pasts are not nearly as traumatic as these fake people, and our parents are still together (over 30 years WOOT WOOT), so our life experiences don't exactly line up
but that being said, I look up to my brother so much. and I switched school mid highschool (like jenny but for less fraught reasons) so I went from being "Andrew's Little Sister" everywhere I went to being just Liz, just myself. and that's an adjustment, from always being the little sister to growing into your own person, and I wouldn't have gotten that opportunity without moving schools, and Jenny probably wouldn't have without moving to London.
and my brother and I have followed our own paths and live in different timezones (and regularly different countries, he splits his time between the US and Canada it's a whole thing), but I never don't feel like he isn't there for me. I know with him I always have a place to crash and someone to send me cute pet pictures when I'm sad and someone who is just as worried about my dad's health as I am (again, whole other thing, not gonna get into it bc privacy but yeah). and I am never entirely lonely as long as he is existing someplace in this world. shit I'm gettting emotional just talking about it but,
he's the guy that drove me to my piano lessons and teased me for my music taste and took me to my first punk show and said "that was so good!" after every performance even though he knows nothing about opera. and when I had a 3 month contract in florida and couldn't take my cat with me he fostered Steph and now Andrew is Steve's favorite person and when I was unemployed I crashed in his apt while he was organized for the 2020 Iowa caucus and he crashed on my couch to visit me after I got my job and moved and we smoke weed and recite monty python and joke and laugh together and I can be a version of myself with my big brother in a way that I can't be with anyone else.
so to bring it back to your meta question, lmao, I imagine and attempt to write Jenny's relationship with her big brother in the same way. it's never the same as when they lived in the same house, and that's hard. (because they stopped living in the same house when he was 18 and she 16 and you can never really go back to that), and they each have their own lives and careers and loves that keep them where they are, but they are still always just...their for each other. and, if given the choice, they are the first person to hear the other's good news.
#FUCK i miss my brother!!!!!!#texting him now brb#gg meta#dan humphrey#jenny humphrey#no joke I forgot that chpater 10 wasn't up yet so i thought you were asking about that one#ah the multichap wip#i never know where i am#how many chapters will it be anyway? i can't wait to find out#asks#anon#ty for sending <3
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HI!
How are you? I saw that you were exhausted in one of your latest posts so just wanted to come in and distract you with my Mingwoo thoughts, i hope it helps you a little bit (also i sent you some asks about threesomes i dont remember the details but i think dumblr ate them😭)
Lets talk about royal aus and soulmates and a little bit of fate-magic (@wonusite knows how much obsessed i am with royal aus + soulmates so i thought why not let you know about it too)
So lets say Minghao is the crown Prince of china and Wonwoo is the crown Prince of korea, you are the princess of another country that was given the power to see scenes from future and make desicions accordingly
(i am from europe so i cant say an exact country name because it would be geographically unreasonable and i dont wanna say a country like japan or Taiwan because it will be weird for me and probably for whoever is reading this lol so i just made up a whole new country because 1) i can 2) this is a magical world so it doesnt have to be realist at all and 3) its way more fun this way)
When your eighteenth birthday comes all of the other kingdoms' magicians becomes aware of your power, which leads to them informing their kings. Now, the kings of the two most powerful kingdoms want you to marry their sons so they can be superior to the other. But your mother, who leads your country, knows better than to trust these greedy men who just wants to use you.
So she sends you off to a mountain with your trustworthy guard Lee Chan, who was saved by your mother when korea was in a war and his vilage was destroyed.
But there is something none of those magicians nor your parents know about, you are already destined to rule three countries by both of the princes by your side. You saw it one night, after three whole months of living in a cabin placed on the highest mountain in your borders you started seeing more of these dreams where you learned more about the future. You saw yourself looking lovingly at a man, who was looking (and feeling) oddly but not unwelcomingly familiar.
The man was tall, broad shoulders and piercing but worried and caring eyes, his eyes never left yours while he was talking about how you should drink the tea he was holding to get rid of your sore throat. But all you could do was just scanning his features while trying to memorise every detail like this was the last time you would ever see your soulmate.
Just as your lover was about to pour down the drink from your throat the door to the bedroom you were resting in slammed open by another male who was looking worried sick. As soon as your eyes met he ran to your other side that wasnt occupied by your other lover and cupped your face lovingly with both of his warm hands.
He cooed and whined about how the love of his life was feeling ill and there was nothing he could to about it. You could see that he was actually concerned about your health but you couldnt help laughing at one of your lover was mumbling about your "poor healt" while the other was about to throw hands at the fact that he was literally holding a cure for you but being ignored by his lovers
You woke up just as Wonwoo was shooing Minghao away and trying to get you to drink the tea.
As you opened your eyes you met with chan's knowing look. You made a questioning head movement as you realized he was smiling almost too sweetly to you. Throughout the years you spent with him you learned that you could never trust him and his intentions if the smirk like smile was stretching his lips. And you were right when he said "what were you smiling to in your dreams? Did you see your soulmate? Or should i say soulmates?"
This is so long already and i just wanted your opinion about this concenpt, so if you like it i might make a part two where they finally meet but if you would like to you can continue this yourself
Have a good day (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤
THIS SEEMS REALLY INTERESTING?!? magical aus are really cool to me and props to anyone who writes them because that takes a lot of effort wow ... this idea seems really cool and if you can flesh out the magical aspect of the story really well it'll be super unique ^-^ ALSO i'm doing pretty good, thank u for asking! currently trying to figure out how to text this man i met yday bc he was so my type my brain short circuited ... also i don't see any minwon thots in my inbox :/ maybe if u send them again i could write a lil something >_<
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you dont have to reply to this if this is too personal a question! but would you consider your childhood + upbringing more toxic than others? my dad also has addictions along with a mental health diagnoses and its hard to talk about it to people, even my friends, who think addiction is like the show Euphoria (this show on hbo) but like some parts of youre writing is like a mirror image of situations ive been in with my family! it just feels real reading your stuff in an amazing way
tw: trauma + clari overshares!
absolutely, 100%. my father was and still is extremely abusive on top of all of his other issues, and my mother also has a severe mental illness. my house was constant turmoil and i used to cry when the school day would end because i didn’t want to go home. it was extremely unstable and i grew up walking on eggshells trying not to trigger one or both of my parents, as well as acted as an emotional punching bag often. i had to do things and witness things no child should ever have to go through, and i cannot express to you how utterly alone i felt, growing up in a small town where it seemed as though everyone else had these wonderful home lives and loving parents and just an overall great childhood. none of my friends understood anything and for a long time, when i was very young, i couldn’t figure out why everything was so much worse at my house than it was for anyone else around me.
so i totally and completely understand where you’re coming from. it’s really rough and it feels incredibly isolating. even now, i don’t have any in real life friends who can understand even in the slightest what i had to go through as a child, and while they’re fantastic listeners and so sweet and so sympathetic, they cannot and will never get it (and i’m glad about that obv! i’d never wish what i went through as a kid on anyone). please know that you are not at all alone in feeling like no one else can truly understand.
i’m so happy and so grateful that i have this little community where i can share some of my work and provide comfort or catharsis or whatever they need etc for people like me, whether they experienced trauma as children or as adults or both. that’s so so special to me and it genuinely means the whole world to me <3 it makes me feel less alone and it brings me a ton of comfort!! so thank you for sharing this with me!!! i’m so sorry you’ve had to go through similar experiences :(( we did and do deserve so so so much better.
i am sending you bunches and bunches of love anon!!! <333 please take good care of yourself <3
#yeah it sucked so bad#also omg do you ever like#get triggered or overly upset when people are all ‘oh i wish i could go back to my childhood’ or reminisce about it?????#i hate feeling so fucking bitter about it because again i would never wish it upon anyone#but i guess i just mourn and weep for the little girl i was#i’m upset she didn’t get the happy childhood she deserved#i’m upset she was taken advantage of#i’m upset she suffered *so much*#my therapist says it’s good to mourn the childhood i never had so#i try to do that hahaha#definitely think it contributes at least a lil to my uhhhh childlike tendencies#not that anyone needs childhood trauma to justify that of course#people of all ages are allowed to enjoy cute stuff like stuffies etc and anyone who tells you otherwise is an asshole#buT ANYWAY#i’m rambling now hehe#the point is: you are not alone#i know how tough it is and how incredibly difficult it feels#and i’m sorry you’re feeling so isolated#but please just know you are not alone#i am giving u a biiiig hug!!!!#please enjoy ur night bb n drink some water!! stay safe!!!#inky.bb#clari gets mail#clari overshares
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fun lil life update or vent actually
I got diagnosed with interstitial cystitis back in January & it is the worst thing in the world that I would not wish upon my worst enemy!
My whole life now revolves around pissing and it sucks. I can't a lot of things that I used to love doing. Concerts are not the same anymore. I danced a lil too hard, and was in pain for WEEKS.
I went hiking like 3 weeks ago & I have been in horrible pain ever since. I piss hellfire and brimstone every single day & afterwards I can barely walk. I just have to lay in fetal position until the pain goes away.
I thought I was having reoccurring UTIs, but after months of on and off antibiotic use with no trace of infection and a million other tests, it turns out my bladder is just actively working against me!
The worst part is, NOTHING has helped the pain so far. There is NO relief. For a while, I found drinking baking soda (yes baking soda) helped the pain, but lately it has been so bad that not even that is helping :(
I have been using cbd a lot to help the pain, but now that I am looking for a new job I can't do that anymore in case I get drug tested. So there goes that too. At least until I lock something down that has good health insurance because I fucking need it.
I hate living in America! I cannot afford the bladder treatments or physical therapy! Instead I have to rely on heating pads, cbd which is out of the question right now, and a fucking CLEANING PRODUCT that is NOT MEANT TO BE CONSUMED as pain management.
I honestly was so very disheartened whenever the baking soda quit working because that would bring the pain from a 10 to like a 2 in one day. Also don't drink baking soda before talking to your doctor about it bc it will shoot out your kidneys if you are not careful.
I just want the pain to GO AWAY!!!!!!! I feel like it is consuming my whole life because it is all I think about!!!! Everything I eat all I can think about is how it will hurt me! When I go down the stairs too hard I think about how that is going to hurt me! At work when I have to pee I PRAY that it is not bad enough to where it hurts to walk afterwards.
I wish it would have been a kidney infection, or kidney stones, or an std, or literally ANYTHING else (except cancer I am really glad it wasn't cancer) because then at least I know it would be temporary.
It was honestly not too bad today until it was. I am off tomorrow, so I am going to baby myself because I fucking deserve to be babied with how bad the pain is constantly. I'm going to play sims all day.
Thank you to all 2 of you who got through this I just needed to yell into the void that I am in PAIN because there is literally nothing else I can do about it until I get a new job and make more money so I can afford physical therapy and bladder pain treatment (which doesn't actually treat anything, it just makes the pain bearable for a short while).
Goodnight & pls send good vibes because I am so tired of being in pain.
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