#i know I am absolutely rooting for one of these and will go feral if it happens

[justanotherfanfolks]

It wouldn't be the Sleeping Beauty Book if Book 7 didn't do the thing, so:

Gosh, I love the power of familial love.

[diejager]

Nooo but there is something about the monster au where there is a casual mention from her that she won't live as long as them (I assume monsters/hybrids are longer lived plus she is a lot more likely to die on mission), like she probably just jokes about it offhandedly and it sends all of them feral because... no? Absolutely not? Insulting. Ridiculous. Not happening.

Cue ultimate clinginess, all rushing to be more intimate because the thought of her not being around is abhorrent. Soap maybe losing it a bit going off on a line of thought about how he could mate her right? Would it be awful if there was a way for her to be a wolf shifter?

I AM GOING TO LOSE MY MIND

Change cw: mention of turning, mention of death, joking about death, tell me if I missed any.

All options are on the table at this point, death had always been something that loomed over them like a shadow, the veil and sickle of death following you wherever you went. You’ve had more than one reminder of your short life, your vulnerability as a human, weak and tender skin, short lives and a delicate body. There were so many things in the world that could pose a possible danger to you and they hated that.

You lived shorter lives than most monsters or hybrids, you grew sick and frail whereas hybrids could fight any viral infections or diseases, you didn’t have thicker skin despite all the extra layers of protective gear and you were a target of many for your choice of career. They were reminded of you mortality whenever you get hurt, blood painting your skin with a strong, metallic odour.

And it didn’t help that you’d often joke about it, throwing offhanded comments that made their hackles raise, body tense and mind brewing with what ifs scenario that has them tearing their hair from the root. While some monsters were more solitary than others, all of them were possessive of what they deemed their family —pack.

Ghost and König stuck closer during training, a tall, imposing figure behind you that acted as a guard dog to ward away anyone they deemed a danger. Soap and Horangi hung around you in the rec room, either laying on you or clinging to you, putting a show of ownership over you. Rudy and Alejandro, the ever active couple, were always finding you around the base, striking up a conversation and wrapping their arms around you. Gaz would was the cuddliest of the group, finding time outside of his busy to snuggle up against you and cover you with his wings, pulling you to sleep on his shoulder. Price, the man with the most authority in the TF made sure that you were always with someone on every Op, having someone to back you up in the most dire situation.

Every visit to the medic made them wild, it brought them closer to desperate measures. Would it be so bad to turn you in one? Would it be so bad to let Soap bite you during the full moon, his bite infecting you with his power: thicker skin, sturdier build, longer lifespan and better sense? The only draw backs were the higher wildness, near feral during full moons and a competitive mindset over the possessiveness and brattiness of a young werewolf.

Would it be so bad to make you return as a wraith? While Ghost learned to control his powers alone, the pain and emotions building up in his body without any way of letting it out, you had him, you wouldn’t be alone with the resurrection. He didn’t want you to feel the terror and agony by yourself —he didn’t want you to know how it felt to die and come back.

Would it be so bad to have a vampire turn you into one without becoming a thrall? You couldn’t walk in the sun, something you told them you enjoyed, you’d be restrained to specific activities and you wouldn’t like that, being limited by the sun. Granted, there were solutions to that, but none very comfortable.

They knew you were aware of your mortality, made fun of it and laughed as it this was your last day, but you didn’t fear death, you only feared leaving them. You were open to their thoughts, listening to their ideas and options with a neutral expression, but you didn’t reject the idea of turning you. That was a good thing, a step forward in their mind.

Now all that needed to do was to let you decide which path you wanted to walk.

tag list: @craxy-person @crowbird @dead-cipher @iwannabealocalcryptid @iizx7y @mxtokko @yeetusspagheetus @capricorn-anon @perfectus-in-morte @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @tallmanlover @distracteddragoness @vxnilla-hxrddrugs @konigsblog @havoc973 @angelcakes-22 @cassiecasluciluce @ramadiiiisme @ramblingsofachaoticthinker @ki-cant-spel

[notcaycepollard]

okay but something I think is so fascinating about goncharov that I haven't seen anyone else talk about is the way food (and consumption) is emblematic of one of the absolute core themes of the film: the way goncharov is so conflicted with his desire for freedom and non-conventional relationships and how that's fundamentally inconsistent with (both externally socially imposed and his own internal) expectations of what is acceptable. and you see that play out in a way that has to be deliberate because to me it's just too explicit to be accidental. when you go back and watch in detail it's obvious that goncharov is always eating, always consuming, when he's interacting with andrey compared to his denial of hunger in almost every interaction with katya. and then on top of that the casual and (what some might argue) inappropriate nature of the food goncharov chooses when it's andrey offering, compared to the rigid enforcement of domesticity as represented by the meals goncharov conspicuously fails to eat with katya, G O D. the way it's filmed? the precise and artificial symmetry of those tables and how she's framed by the candles, the silverware? and like, I know we're all obsessed with the anchovy scene and I get it, it makes me just as feral as everyone else and also we all get it, anchovy as stand in for going down on someone, it's not SUBTLE, but to me the fruit stall scene is just as important. it's the first time goncharov is offered something and takes it!! and I don't think it's coincidence either that what goncharov chooses - what andrey offers - is representative of naples, as opposed to the traditional russian food katya is always serving.

and like honestly, I know some people interpret the dinner scenes with katya as misogynistic, I'm not saying it's not a valid take, but again to me I think it speaks just as much about how trapped katya is by social expectations too. she tries so hard to perform the role of the good wife, polishing the fucking silverware and making blini when she deserves so much more than that, and then there's the parallel of sofia offering her a lick of her gelato and honestly can you really tell me the anchovy scene is still your favourite, katya/sofia is so fucking slept on, the tension!!!! L I K E come on how is everything in this film about fucking oral sex I mean

anyway the way that by the end of the film these conflicts are resolved with goncharov and katya at the table on the street, finally eating together but in a way that's not constrained by the trappings of domesticity or the expectation of remaining true to your roots, katya is finally seen by goncharov as a whole person with her own internal life and he's able to break bread with her, that final shot of them drinking wine with the church behind them, it's just, the catholicism in this film is a lot okay

and like I truly think that the way rusty in ocean's eleven is always eating is a deliberate homage to this film, we know soderbergh is influenced by avant-garde cinema and I don't think that's coincidence, and now I'm going to go write the katya-centric fic I want to see in the world with the title 'lay the table (with the fancy shit)' because I am inveterate taylor swift trash

[secret-engima]

Kumo Thoughts

So this will hopefully be quick but the most common take I see for Kumo in the Naruto fandom is that it's a overly militaristic hellhole (pardon the language) that kidnaps and forcibly breeds any bloodline it can get its hands on and like.

I get it?

the Naruto ninja world is absolutely messed up enough to accommodate a village like that. Especially with- *waves at Kiri*, *waves at ROOT*, *waves at Ame*, *wa-*. But I feel like personally I think that's. The shallowest take? Like if that's how you wanna world build it! You can! Lots of angst and interesting subterfuge down that way.

But we seen in canon that shinobi who live in Really horrible villages do tend to go missing-nin en masse; Kiri is the poster child for this, but Iwa and Suna both have some ... pretty noticeable defections. On the flip side the only REAL Kumo missing-nin we see, iirc, are the Kinkaku brothers.

From The First Shinobi War.

Like- what are things we know about Kumo *really* from the show/s?

and the one everyone harps on in worldbuilding- they tried to kidnap Hinata and Kushina.

HOWEVER. The rest of the things we know about them are:

2. Their Raikage is allergic to doors. He refuses to acknowledge doors. He can and will smash through any wall, window, or other non-door entity in order to exit or enter a room when at all possible. This is not the behavior of a Strict Rigid Militaristic Man this is the behavior of a feral gorilla someone stuffed in an office and expected to do paperwork. Which, granted, A is fully capable of doing his paperwork, by all accounts he's actually really good at running his village. But again. This man is allergic to doors or manners and anyone who is willing to arm wrestle Senju Tsunade to get medical assistance for his own men can't be all bad let's be real.

3. Killer B exists. I feel like he alone is enough evidence against the "military breeding program hellhole" fanon but to break it down. This "brother" of A is not actually his brother. In canon, B is literally just- *some kid*, AT BEST a cousin of the previous Jinchuuriki but that is not confirmed iirc, that was among several other kids that were all lined up and told "we need a new Jinchuuriki and A needs a fighting buddy, run at this training dummy and see if you can help him decapitate it" and when B was the one who succeeded they went "congrats you're his brother now, here's your complimentary octopus monster". And like everyone just accepts this? Not a SINGLE person calls B as a fake brother or points out that he and A are not actually related. Not to mention B has the strongest and most stable relationship with his Biju until Naruto and Kurama work out their bromance, and B was rocking that friendship with his biju *years* before Naruto even knew Kurama was a Thing That Existed.

4. B is also beloved by his village. BELOVED. The people adore him and his weird rapping nonsense. And yeah there's flashbacks in the anime to that not being the case when he was first introduced but B was actually able to work on changing their minds. You really think "small feral child rapping at civilians to make them warm up to him" would have flown in Kiri? In Iwa who canonically keep abusing their jinchuuriki to the point of running off? Nope. No sir. B is also allowed to have a team of his own, and seems to not only be an accepted member of the village but also a much trusted and beloved one who is even allowed his own team? Even Konoha doesn't have that good a track record lbr. It took Naruto face punching the guy who just committed genocide on the entire village for Konoha to go "you know what? We like you now".

5. One of the only other jinchuuriki we see that has fully mastered their Biju state and is on good terms with their Biju while also not being a missing-nin (or brainwashed and then immediately dead) is ALSO a Kumo ninja. Namely the holder of the Two Tails. Now on the wiki it says that she was put through a "detestable" training program but we all know how inconsistent Kishi is with... everything worldbuilding ever. And if we go off behavior alone from the brief scenes with her, Yugito Nii is?? Really stable??? And solid with her Biju??? She gave her pawprint for an Uchiha child's book of cat paw prints for crying out loud.

6. throughout the entire show, Jinchuuriki are consistently treated as the lowest class citizens. In basically every village. Naruto in Konoha, Kushina cried when she realized Minato was going to make Naruto a Jinchuuriki and put him through what she went through growing up as one so you know she didn't have a great time either, GAARA is his own entire dissertation on Jinchuuriki treatment and stability, Fuu was raised by the village leader of her village but had zero friends and was canonically super lonely and isolated, Han and Roku straight up ran away from Iwa because of whatever they were put through, a maneuver only repeated in another village by Utakata from Kiri. But in Kumo we find two jinchuuriki who have mastered their biju, are well respected by their peers and fellow citizens, and are basically treated like any other really weirdo ninja from the village barring needing to be monitored with bodyguards in B's case, which is mostly because he keeps running away to go train under rap artists so you can understand why A is ready to go frothing at the mouth feral at his brother sometimes.

All I'm saying is that if even the village's "monsters" are treated that way, why does everyone stick with the fanon that they're a breeding, bloodline stealing hellhole?

Imo it would be WAY more fun to world build Kumo as the feral mountain ninja-mandalorians of the Elemental Nations, who have a reputation for bloodline theft because they keep finding Actual Strays, Refugees from other villages, and Illegitimate bloodline children and going: YO ANYONE GONNA ADOPT THIS? and not waiting for an answer. Your a missing ninja from Kiri and you're fed up with both them and missing-nin life and want to come work for us? Great. Oh you also have a valuable kekkei genkai that can be inherited? Awesome have you heard of our red light district and child support program or better yet our tax deductible program for marrying one of our lovely civilians and raising a family here where no bloodline purges will ever happen ever. Oh you're a stray Uzumaki on the run from bloodline hunters? Well we may have been involved in destroying Uzushio (depends on your fan interpretation since canonically we do not know which villages did that other than Not Konoha) but we also have hot food, good housing, high ninja standards of living, and free weekly entertainment in betting when our Raikage is going to launch his desk at his brother like a high speed missile because B's rapping got too cringy.

Let Hinata's and Kushina's kidnapping either be the exception to their usual playbook of how they acquire bloodlines (hey it's not their fault if the other villages can't keep it in their pants/can't inspire loyalty) OR have it be seen, culturally in Kumo, as something more akin to a rescue mission. Yes these two girls are useful and have useful bloodlines, that's tactically wise, but also have you SEEN how Konoha treats their jinchuuriki? They have seal master princess and are treating her like a dog on a leash! And literally everyone knows what the Hyuuga do to their own kids if they aren't main branch, and we can't rescue any of those kids without their eyeballs exploding and them dying but hey we can snag the heiress and then any kids she has won't have to be branded so-.

Like I feel that would be so much more INTERESTING? Instead of having Konoha be the only "nice" village and make this weird tonal dissonance for how the "nice" village has the most incompetent leadership (Sarutobi) and underground atrocities (Danzo and Orochimaru) while every other village is Horrible All The Time For Everyone why not have Kumo be actually Really Functional and treat their shinobi and Jinchuuriki well and their horrible reputation is *mostly* (not entirely, because. Ninja.) be cultural clashes between the feral mountain ninja and Everyone Else and propaganda from the other villages who would like their shinobi to STOP DEFECTING TO KUMO PLEASE. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY HAVE DENTAL.

Seriously I feel like there is so much more you could do with that angle than just "yet another shinobi village that is Bad and Awful and Needs The Power of Friendship yet somehow has this really stupid goofy jinchuuriki man who loves his brother and his village shut up don't think about it".

[viablemess]

I have a lot of feelings about the Durin Family, Fili in Particular

---Howdy folks it is that time of year again where i go absolutely feral for Fili Durin. He is underappreciated and tumblr has addressed that but i feel an URGE to add to the discourse so here I am. This post is not done, fyi. I will add more to it later.

It's 10pm/22:00. I just got home from class. I'm waiting for my ramen water to boil. There is a fireplace and some holiday lights. Let's have a (fireside)chat.

First of all, the constant tying of Fili and Kili together?? Like I get it. Merry and Pippin parallels. I love parallels (looking at you, George), but come on. Chill, just a tad. I know Tolkein didn't give you much to go by, but he didn't even write tauriel into the books or Bolg and yall ran with that anyways. Use your creative brains, pls, I'm actually begging you.

ANYWAYS. Have them develop separately even if only a little. Kili is the younger one, literally viewed younger bc he has the smallest itty bitty beard. He is not the heir, he is the spare, and could have some deep rooted personal insecurities about that as a result. He may feel that he deeply has to prove himself to Thorin bc he does not have a set role in the future like Fili does. Kili gets his romance with Tauriel, which--khgf;ushfw;e uneneccary, but I can appreciate the attempt to broaden the target market and appeal to a romance audience even if the previews did not hint at that happening at all so it would not have been a marketable trait per say but I digress. Again with the parallels of forbidden romance, poor Legolas still does not get any, we know, he was not even in the books really either, let's move on.

Kili is babied by the company, needs to prove himself, his mother made him promise to return to him so he is still deeply in the "coming of age" side of things (a lot of the company is, but that's a topic for another word vomit fireside chat). He begins to realize that he might like elves which goes against his family and he was already the spare, might as well go all in and fall in love with an elf. Fine. I can deal with that. But let's see more of Kili messing up, more so than just the trolls. Let's see him make silly goofy mistakes more. The company always tries to keep him out of the line of fire by making him an archer (heh) and keeping him off the front lines. They do everything to protect him, bc Dis is a terrifying woman, ansd if she made Kili promise to return to her, dammit, the company will return him to her if it is the last thing they do. Kili likely spends less time with Thorin and Dwalin than his brother, so here he is, questioning his own self worth and if he belongs in the party and his own abilities while coming of age and sticking out from his family even more, so why not rebel a little? why not be an archer which is not as glorified, why not consider shaving to meet cross cultural beauty standards, why not date the elf (dammit, I'm convincing myself for Tauriel's presence and I hate that). He's trying his best and messing up along the way, and is INNOCENT. Completely. He is aware of his ancestry and what happened, but he and Bilbo are the two being narrated to when telling of the Durin family history, and as a result, the differences in dwarven / hobbit culture could be explored further. Thorin has a little kiddo to watch out for, and maybe is softer around, because even Thorin knows Kili is young, maybe even too young to be here but if they didn't let him come he would have snuck after them, so we get to see a more forgiving, family-man Thorin who we do not see anywhere else (and yes we get that at the end of the movie but I'm getting to my critique of the (I almost called it a keldabe wrong fandom) forehead touch with a name I cannot recall later).

Onto his brother. Fili is the heir, okay. So, that means that he is likely raised very differently from Kili. Whereas Kili may have had some time to play and be a kid (as much as they could in the Blue Mountains as refugees, anyways), Fili likely was given no such privilege. He followed Thorin around like a lost puppy, watching his every move and trying to imitate it, because he knew he would have to do Thorin's job someday. Even if Thorin did get married / have a kid / etc there would likely still be a window where Fili was in charge before Thorin's kid came of age, and as the years went on, the chances of that happening diminished, and so Fili threw himself more and more into his crown-prince-studies. Maybe a little obsessively, just like his uncle, who had practically stepped into the role as father. Because Fili thought he had to be Thorin. Thorin, meanwhile, saw the King that Fili could be, and that King was so much better than him. Fili grew up humble as a result of them all being refugees, something Thorin did not have to learn until much later and even then he never fully got it. Fili was kind, because he saw the suffering of his people, and understood how large of a difference a small act could make. Fili also had the teachings of Thorin drilled into him, because Thorin's problem was that whenever he saw Fili, he also saw Frerin. Frerin was Thorin's younger brother, just as blond as Fili, and (I'm assuming) played a roll in Fili's name (both starting with F). Frerin died at the Battle of Azanulbizar, and Thorin remembers that battle, he remembers losing his little brother. He can understand the fear that Fili feels whenever the company encounters a fight because he has felt the same in the worst of ways. But, because Thorin understands, he pushes Fili to be better than him. Even if that pushing is too much, too hard, too fast, too young--Thorin knows that Fili can be better than him, and Thorin does not want Fili to suffer as he has suffered, so he does everything in his power to prepare Fili for what is to come, and because Thorin loves him, that is all he does. He pours that love out as motivation and pushes Fili to do more, do everything, and do it better than he did. Fili, being young, does not realize this. He just sees it as Thorin preparing him to be king, and quite brutally at that, but Thorin is the closest thing he has to a father, Fili is not going to question it, not for anything, except for his little brother. And that just hurts Thorin, because he knows that, had he had the chance, he would have died to save Frerin at Azanulbizar. He knows Fili would do the same for Kili, but they are both so, so young. Thorin fears he could lose them both in one go, if he is not careful. So he is harsh, he scares them, he is forceful, because they do not have time for care and coddling, that won't keep them safe.

Whereas the company sees Kili as carefree and fun, Fili is cold, like his uncle. He is stone, and observant, and polite. He has to be Thorin, AND everything that Thorin is not. It is an impossible task, but he has to try. That is what is expected of him, not just by his mother and uncle, but by the entire people that is behind him, waiting for him to ascend to be king. He does not get a choice. The only one who can pull him out of that rut is his brother, with whom he actually feels like he can be what he is -- barely older than a kid.

Im gonna let that sink in for a second. They're CHILDREN.

anyways.

So, Kili gets his romance plot. It's cute and it parallels. And I've established that Kili must prove himself, and Fili will bend over backwards to make Thorin happy, which likely also extends to Dis, his mother.

I imagine Dis gave Kili the river rock to come back home, and she told Fili "be safe, don't be stupid, etc etc" but HIGHLIGHTED "take care of your brother", and Thorin does the same in the movies.

So, when Kili galavants up the bridge to open the gate after the party does a little slip and slide down the river, Fili naturally goes with. He sees that Kili is about to get shot. And Fili, who knows above all else he has to be king and he has to take care of Kili, just does the normal heroric thing and jumps in front, and he gets shot.

He is chastized for it, for being stupid, but overall they both are thanked for getting them out of the mess, and there is no time to waste because the company has to leave, and Fili (like what Kili did albeit maybe with more conviction) will not let others help him, or show weakness. So Fili continues on, poisoned, and Kili has the guilt of knowing his brother took an arrow meant for him. Fili must suffer the consequences of being a hero, and Kili must suffer the consequences of being the youngest, and feeling guilty for not taking responsibility for his own actions.

This all boils over to a fight where Kili tells Fili that "I made the choice to go up there, I didn't ask you to intervene!" because dammit Kili wants to be treated like an adult and FIli just took that away from him, again.

Fili, naturally, retorts, "I just did what I had to, because you know what? mom didn't tell me to come home--all she told me, all everyone ever tells me--is to take care of you! So I don't matter, not to this family, not in the same way you do. You're a son. I'm a prince."

Which, ouch. Slap in the face to Kili, and maybe the company overhears. Kili feels slighted, but also maybe is starting to understand, he can be a kid, Fili cannot. And Fili, meanwhile, is about to break from the weight of expectations that feels heavier than the lonely mountain ever could.

So, Kili stays with Fili when they get to Bard's, because it is what Fili would have done for him. Thorin is pissed, but lets it go, because Kili isn't Fili, and ouch, again.

I imagine Bofur helps quite a bit, he has a kind soul and listens better than most, and while Fili is delirious with fever Bofur talks him through it. Kili gets to be more coherent with Tauriel, and we get to see if their relationship actually holds up outside of a "she saved my life I love her" style of interaction which bleh is cliche as all get out.

and PLEASE when the dwarves do get out of Bard's house, they get to actually help Bard deal with the dragon. I read a fic a long time ago (if I find it I'll link it and the author below) where Fili had to be Bard's arrow anchor instead of Bard's son and I just chef's kiss. The dwarves who are left get to help the humans, and they feel more sympathy for them. Maybe they witness more death, and so when the dwarves do turn their backs on the humans later, Fili, Kili, Bofur, Bifur & crew are like "wait wtf they have suffered enough" unlike their future indifference we see in the movie.

and THEN all the dwarves arrive at the mountain, and Fili and Kili actually get welcomed home like the family they ARE, but it's stunted, because something is wrong with Thorin. He is glad to see Kili and Fili, but barely spares them a glance. They've heard the rumors and stories, of gold sickness. They begin to wonder, and we get to see them talk (probably with Bilbo) about the concept in secret where everyone is looking for the arkenstone. We get to see Kili with his hero worship refuse to believe Thorin would fall under a gold thrall. We get to see Fili, who is afraid of becoming like Thorin, too scared to enter the treasury unless immensly pressured to do so, and even then someone is always with him, because he worries. He still holds the ruby Thorin threw at him, and he keeps it in his pocket. He holds it so tight the edges cut his palm, and the pain seems to distract him from the wealth that surrounds him. I always wondered if Thorin gave Fili that ruby because he was the heir, or the only dwarf with so much gold about their person, with his hair. It was what Thorin saw first, not because it was his nephew, but because he looked like the very thing that already clawed Thorin down into his own demise.

AND NOW the war starts. and this needs to be another post bc ffs I'm losing my shit this is much too long.

[icarusredwings]

Something The Cat Dragged In

A badly written COMEDY oneshot. (I have no clue how to write 11 or amy im sorry) No smut.

Posted: July 31st 2024.

Words: ~7,900

Ships: The Ponds, River/11/Simm

Prompt: The Doctor and River are trying to domesticate a feral Master with clicker training, and it's going about as well as you'd think.

This fic includes: Jealous 11, SFW worshiping kink, Horrible cat puns, Bondage, Amy being a freak, Pet play, Degrading, an Oblivious 11, and Mentions of Cheetah Virus changing a bored master's deoxyribonucleic structure. Consider that your trigger warning.

“Are you sure this is safe?” The ginger man asked, hesitant about the scrappy man that the raggedy doctor had brought on board the TARDIS.

“Absolutely!” He chimed, the smile on his face clearly larger than how much trust he had in this situation being anywhere near ‘safe’.

He knew that smile. That was the ‘I'm lying because I don't want to tell the truth’ smile. The one you had to watch out for. So nervous that fibber was..

“Oh, Amy's going to kill you…”

“I'm sure she will! As for now-” Rory watched as the Doctor jumped around the TARDIS a bit, hitting buttons, pulling levers, twisting dials. The usual. What wasn't so usual though was the fact a half blonde man with about half an inch of dark roots was standing there, Glaring at him. Swallowing, He stepped to the left, and then more towards the Doctor, being tracked by his eyes. Something about the way he smirked with such wide teeth made a shiver run up his spine.

Look, He's met a lot of odd aliens and crazies at the hospital but this guy looked at him as if he'd eat him whole in one bite.

“Doctor-”

“Not now Rory! Busy!” Coming around, He seemed to have this be the entire plan, getting the drop on him as he spun behind him, clamping a thick metal bracelet around his wrist, holding it as he quickly clamped the other. “Hey!”

“There we go! That's better!”

Huffing, the man began to try to take off the bracelet only to emit a small red light and a beeping noise. “Take this off of me! Right now!”

“Uhhhh…No.”

“Yes! Take it off or i'll-”

“You'll what? Hm? Still in the habit of telling me your plans are we? God you've always been like that. So clever and yet.. so dull..”

“I am NOT dull! You're stupid bowtie is dull!”

“Hey! Bowties are cool. Now then, Rory this is-... er.”

“Say it.”

“..er..”

“Go on. Say it!”

Taking a breath, The Doctor knew that no matter what he said would be bad. If he introduced him as Koschei, He'd not rest until he at least stabbed him in one of his stomachs.

“Rory, Master. Master, Rory.”

With a great sense of pride, The Master grins ear to ear, Putting his hands out and bowing as if he had just introduced someone extremely important. Perhaps an old friend that once held such great respect but now it seems both of their minds have gone a bit off their rockers. More so the other's, but they both thought this.

“... should I be worried?”

“Oh, Yes.”

“No!”

“Don't lie to them, Doctor! You and I both know what happens when I'm hungry..”

“Doctor? What's he mean by that?” Giving a look of concern, he backed away just slightly enough to trip over a loose wire. This fear seemed to please the blonde while the Doctor rolled his eyes. “Oh you are fine, I just fed you.”

“He's on a feeding schedule? Like… some kind of pet?”

“Do not speak of me like I am nothing but a pet!! I'm far beyond Your comprehensive abilities! Use your tongue to call me anything below your Master and It will surely be a mistake!”

“Yeah, About that, You're in charge of not letting me forget to feed him, okay? Jolly good, alright, Now! I do have to apologize, Your old room was destroyed but we have bunk beds! Cool right?” He rambled.

“Why do I have to make sure you remember?” Rory asks, scrunching his nose as he took another step forward.

“Do you want to find out?” The Master beamed, quite excited about teasing and gaining authority over the Doctor's fellow companions. If anything, They were pets. Not him.

“I wouldn't recommend that! Lets just say, You don't want to find out. Anywho! Back to what I was saying!” For a third time he turns to his old friend, new traveling buddy, hands clapped together politely.

“Your old room is busted. Gonzo! So you'll have to make a new one. Any requests?”

“Wait wait wait-”

“Good god, Rory what now? You're being quite rude!”

“You can't just bring someone aboard who's going to eat me and fly on by!”

“I thought we already established this. Keep up!”

“Yeah, keep up!” The Master shouted, egging the man on. “And if you can't, get off the ship! Do us all a favor and jump overboard.”

At this, he was met with a cross look and his ear being pulled. “Aye stop that! Now you're the one being rude!”

The days that followed weren't so simple. Between the Master trying to get out the front door, snapping at them, insulting everyone he met, refusing to eat certain things, and both Rory and Amy losing sleep with how much they argued, you could say that things were in fact not going well. The Doctor on the other hand said differently, claiming that it took time to get used to TARDIS living arrangements.

The thing that really got him rowdy though was his vaccines. Between scratching, cursing and kicking, it was a wonder how the Doctor was able to manage him at all, even if his methods weren't exactly filled with the most logic, some being closely related to rewards.

When the Master DID finally escape, his punishment was to wear a bell. That's it. A normal bell. Quite a large one though. Suited more for a large dog then a cat.

When he purposely shoved all the trinkets and containers off of the top of the fridge in order to sit on top of it, The Doctor made him a loft to lay on with his own window.

This seemed to have worked for a while, watching the stars as they floated by. But then when the problem arose of him not eating, The Doctor gave him a bean bag chair hoping having his own special spot would make him feel better.

But it didn't. If anything he only ripped it up, purposely destroying it. Coming back to the TARDIS to that kind of mess was enough for Amy to suggest getting rid of him or perhaps caging him up when they left but the Doctor was just in awe at how relaxed he was, snoring ever so softly while lounging on his loft as if he were purring from curing his boredom for the day.

“Aww Amy.. I couldn't. Look how happy he is.”

“He trashed the TARDIS! I thought you said you were going to take care of him?”

“I am! It's just… oh what's that word?”

“Hard?”

“Impossible?”

“Nothing is impossible.” He says, shaking his head.

“But you said that tons of times..”

“And yet none of them were true!” He says, wagging a finger. “I just have to think.”

So he thought. What else could he do? The Master was bound to rebel. That's been proven already.

“Well you better do it soon or else he's going to rip up your fez next..” this gave him an idea.. quite a large one at that.

“Oh Rory!! Wonderful Rory!” He says, grabbing his face as he holds him tight with that excited but manic glint.

“That's just what he needs!”

The two watched as the Doctor ran off to the console, trying to jump over the billions of beads only to slip, Falling for only a moment, popping back up over on the other side.

“A .. fez??”

“No!- well. Yes. But no. You'll see! Now go on. Don't you have erm-” he waved his hand at them, his brain doing that thing where his words were all jumbled up inside, making it difficult to speak. “Kissing to do? Or something? Don't worry about me I got a lot of cleaning up to do and- OH yes! Amy, are you finished playing that game with the rope? You know, the one you told me about?”

The ginger man's eyes widened greatly as he gave his wife a look of terror. The kind you only get when your head was screaming ‘WHY WOULD YOU TELL HIM THAT?!’

The woman now blushed, Crossing her arms as she returned the look to her husband, implying that she had everything under control. “You mean that one where we pretend to be Fenrir and see how long it takes to get untied?”

“Yes!” He snapped his fingers. “That one! Quite a loud game is it not? Anywho- Can I have the rope back? I'm glad you two wish to practice kidnapping safety but I'm afraid In this era people are going more with handcuffs then rope.”

Amy's eyes became brighter, the kind that scared her husband to death.

“Handcuffs you say?”

“It seems in most situations they're used more often than rope nowadays.”

“Is that so?”

“..Why are you asking like that?”

“I was just wondering…What if we practiced getting out of handcuffs instead then? It would make a lot more sense to practice with modern tools then-”

“Oh will you SHUT up!? Get a room will you?! God. It's bad enough I'm stuck here with you two. I don't want to hear that either!”

Glancing up, the Doctor grinned seeing the Master awake and his same cranky self.

“Oh, be nice! They do have a room!...Still don't know why you'd ever want me to take out the bunk beds though…” he muttered this last part, rubbing his chin.

“Soooo….Doctor? Cuffs?” Amy started, rocking back on her heels.

“Oh yes! Here you are.” Tapping a button on the console, a small drawer popped out as he tossed two sets at the red head, Tapping another as a door in the wall opened up, revealing cleaning supplies. “Now, if you excuse me. I have work to do. And you mister! You're going to help me!” He shouts, only to be given a lazy bird and a “No i'm not.”

Sighing, the Doctor made a face of disappointment but wasn't surprised.

“I suppose you're not… Got it..”

It's been about 2 months since the Master joined their voyages. So far he's only had about 30 true crimes, and by that I mean he caught one of the homes they visted on fire.

About 53 “naughty” days. The Last week though? It's been secretly excellent. The Doctor thought that things were going great.

He's found that by giving the Master MORE freedom, he's actually learned how to behave quite a bit. It seems that separating him from the tasks of everyday life made him feel unwanted and untrusted (for obvious reason).

Hell, even he was shocked when told he was allowed to do important things.

Not only did he now have free range of the TARDIS but he was allowed to do mostly everything. He's even tried his luck at pushing buttons by sniffing around the other companions' rooms, knocking over and purposely misplacing things. All of which were met with a short talk and sometimes a hug.

This confused him greatly. He just broke something, why was he being forcibly hugged and then scolded? The Doctor would tell him to clean it up and if he didn't would get locked in the room (so he couldn't make another mess) forced to observe as the Doctor cleaned it himself.

He still had the bio bracelets so that he couldn't fully man the TARDIS but the Doctor began asking him to pull levers and asking his opinion on things. But why would the Doctor want his advice? He was a mere prisoner… usually captains of a ship didn't ask the people in the cellar for advice.

His bell had been kept on for safety reasons, mainly because he thought it was funny to chase Rory around until Amy came to spoil the fun by spraying him with a water pistol holding a liquid he couldn't quite place. Sometimes it stunk.

Once he opened his mouth to hiss at her and it went straight down his throat, cutting off the noise as he growled, only to realize it was sweeter than regular water. What was that? Sugar water?? No if it was sugar water it wouldn't stink like that..

Looking out his window, he was content as he watched the stars pass by, not entirely sure of what planet they were at but had a close enough idea of which solar system they were in. He could feel that they were extremely far from earth, further then that pathetic planet pluto, further than alpha centauri, and even further than Estello Aqualo, a planet full of nothing but water inhabitants.

Oh how he hated water planets. He much preferred reddish orange planets like Mars, Jupiter And Saturn. They reminded him of home… and the fact that blue was SO Last millenia-

While laying up here, up on his metal loft, He was mindlessly thinking, something he couldn't often do because of the constant thumping in his head but he's found that these bracelets dimmed the sound into a small tap rather than a thump of a hammer against his skull. He still heard it, oh yes he definitely could but it was much softer. Almost like a lullaby.

Lazily tossing the Doctor's ridiculous fez up and down, he wondered if the Doctor would be able to ever take it away… Rassilon only knew just how threaded the beat been woven into his life. And as much pain as it has caused him… He couldn't help but wonder…

What would he be without it?

Would he go back to being who he was before? An innocent child hoping, praying, Waiting until the day he received his Time Robes and was given his own TARDIS 60? Until he was gifted the honor of having his own team to command?

A team of his friends?

Until he was on the same team as Theta…?

No.

He could never stand with the Doctor. Never fully on the same team but yet- He sat up. They reminded him of those cartoons he watched when on earth.

Wile E Coyote and the Roadrunner.

Iron Man and Captain America.

Batman and Joker.

The Master looked at the hat in his hands, pondering if he should put it on.. or perhaps throw it out the window! Or…

“Has anyone seen my Fez? I seem to have misplaced it.”

“Have you checked your room?”

“I've checked my bunk, yes. I've also checked the clothing closet and storage rooms.”

Listening from above, he let out a deep sigh, hoping down with a clattering of the TARDIS grate underneath. Being glanced at, He took a few steps forward, handing him the hat.

“Wha- Oh! Thank you!” Taking the fez he smiled, putting it on as if he seemed incomplete without it only to quickly hug him before bouncing off to what ever nonsense he was up to now.

Returning the hug, He didn't seem to notice until Rory stood there, Staring at him with an open mouth.

“What?” He grunted.

“...You..”

“Spit it out you ape.”

“..You returned his hat..”

“Congratulations. You have eyes.”

“No no no, I mean… you returned his hat.. and hugged him..”

“He hugs all of us all the time, whats your point? If you say something stupid like friendship im going to stab you.”

“But today you hugged back. You never hug back.”

“And? so Wh- Oohh ….” Now freezing, He blinked. He did do that.. didn't he? Why did he do that?!

Why did he give it to him so easily? He didn't even ask for it back and he just.. handed it to him? And not only the hat but he returned his hug too?

….Why did I do that?

Now the two stared at each other, both worried and concerned on different levels for opposite things. One worried if he was getting soft, or possibly being brainwashed, the other concerned that he was about to lose an arm.

The silence only broke when he looked at his hands and muttered “Am I sick?? Don't answer that!”

Opening his mouth to reply, Rory immediately shut it, Nodding softly in understanding. While he was quite a brave man, he was smart enough to know that the Master WOULD in fact eat him. And the Doctor couldn't save him forever…

For the next couple of days, he thought about this heavily, deciding that next time he would rip up the hat on purpose. Yeah that'll show him! As for now, He had been standing by the control console, looking at the destination only to scrunch up his nose.

Oh great. Earth. 44 BCE. Just what they needed. More interactions with uncivilized humans fighting over politics… at least this would be entertaining. Assassinations always were when they succeeded.

Coming up to the console, The Doctor clicked a few things, Petting part of the tubing with a happy hum. The hum was slow and sounded like something he'd heard many many years ago. Something of taste. Yawning, He listened to the humming until the Doctor walked off to do something else before unconsciously bee lining for his room.

Climbing into the top bunk (The Doctor had the bottom one whenever he did decide to sleep so it was barely used.) The Master pulled the blankets up around him. Tugging his pillow close, closing his eyes. It didn't take long until he started making rhymed breaths, a rumbling in his chest and throat starting to form from the amount of comfort under the thick blanket.

He got cold easily, as most Gallifreyans did due to the natural heat that they grew up with. Even during his time as Prime Minister he wore layers. Lots of them, blankets in the Limos and curling up to Lucy in an attempt to steal what little warmth humans had. Why the Doctor favored London, a cold, rainy and cloudy place? He'd never know. He prefered somewhere warm. Usually the warmer, the more interesting beasts to see scare small children.

A few moments later he stopped the purring, opening his eyes with a confused “Wait a minute..” look. Why was he sleeping? He wasn't even tired and it was 1 in the afternoon. His regular nap time wasn't until 4.

What in all things unholy was going on?? Did the Doctor do this? A curse perhaps? Was it these?

Rolling over, he looked at the metal on his wrists and for the 14th time he began to gnaw on the bracelets, growling in frustration. What was going on!? Whatever it was, he didn't like it… Mmh…Oh well. He was already there.

The next day, a certain clattering of pans made him perk up. He was swinging in his rope hammock, batting at the decorations that the Doctor specifically told him not to mess with, climbing on them, tugging them, kicking them, biting them, etc.

Anything to try and ruin it but it was proving to be quite difficult to do and not be caught seeing as it was thick enough to not break easily.

Sure, he could just rip them down with the strength he had but that would be no fun. It would cut the fun by 78% actually. He'd already done the math. Whenever someone could come in, He'd instantly stop and pretend to be innocently snoozing.

The pang of pans though? That was enough to bring him down. Climbing out of his swing, the Master followed the noise, coming to the kitchen as he sat at the table, the chair specifically to the left side, separated from the others. A nice pillow on his chair as well.

Honestly he was quite proud of this one. The Master had thrown a fit for hours straight until the Doctor gave him a special chair and now he sat in it like a king peering over his subjects (when in truth, It's just because everyone else was too scared to sit next to him while he ate, afraid they'd get snapped at or bitten if the Master thought they wanted his food)

Sitting here, he waited. Patiently at first but his patience was quickly running out when seeing no one else was coming. Hadn't they heard? Were they not hungry? Well good. He'd simply have it all then. There was no waste on this ship. None at all thanks to him, except when it came to pickles or cucumbers. He hated them. They looked and smelled foul enough for him to hiss, gag, and vomit all at once.

Eventually, his patience grew tired as he looked to the redheaded woman who dropped these pans everyday. For some reason, the Doctor kept these pans up high and getting them down was a nightmare, even for him.

You had to move the pans in order to get the plates behind them. Honestly, the kitchen's arrangement system made him think of the time the Doctor used to store his robes with his socks and his shirts with his underwear.

Who did that??

“Where is everyone?” He asked her, in which turn she turned to glance at him, having heard the jingling of his bell already.

“What do you mean?”

“It's time for a meal…yes?”

“No?? it's 3 pm. Why would you think it's time for dinner already?” She asked.

The Master paused.. Why did he think it was time? Wait, why did he come in here in the first place?

Oh yes! The pans.

“You.. dropped the pans.” It was said with a questioning tone at the end more than a statement.

“Yeah? I drop them every time because this kitchen is an utter mess.”

“riiighht…”

As much as he didn't want to admit it, Amy was right. This place was a disaster. If he didn't enjoy the chaos of watching the humans try to figure out the unorganized kitchen he'd say screw it and fix it himself. But what fun would that be?

“What do you want anyway?” She grumbled.

“What?”

“You heard me. What do you want? What stupid little plan do you have now? Come to remind me how dumb I am for dropping everything? Going to threaten to eat me? ...Again?”

The master blinked, tilting his head.

“Well… No I-” Wait.. How dare she speak to him like that! But.. yeah.. why did he come to the sound of the pans? It was odd. Even For him. Perhaps he got his hours mixed up?- No. It was something more than that. Something he wasn't able to figure out.

Seeing the confusion on his face, Amy frowned, now feeling a little bad. “Oh… Are you hungry? Do you want a snack or..something?”

“Huh?”

“It's just that.. you ran in here like a cat hearing a can of tuna being opened.”

“What!? I did not!”

“Oh you SO did. Here, I'll ask the Doctor where he keeps the snacks for you, okay?”

“What do I look like a dog?”

“He mentioned something about buffalo lungs the other day.”

As if hearing a magic word, He smiled at her widely, the kind he only did when actually excited. “He did? Where?”

“But I dont know if they're yours or his… he eats some pretty weird stuff.”

“Aye! Are you insulting our culture?”

“Maybe I am. What are you going to do about it, bellboy? He's not going to give you a treat if you keep misbehaving.”

Glaring, his arms crossed. “...You're the one being rude.. the Doctor says I'M not allowed to be rude so why can you? God he was always a hypocrite..”

“Look just-” But before she could continue, he heard a different noise. A known squeak of an in-need-of-oil door. Turning away, he ignored her, taking off towards the door.

“Typical..” she sighed, figuring she might as well go see if the Doctor would share his snacks or not, just incase he came back.

Running through the TARDIS Involved jumping over a couple of things and coming to a stop as he saw that curly headed woman standing in the doorway holding a box.

Stepping deeper into the TARDIS, Her heels tapped, No- Clicked against the tile, humming as she spun around what looked to be a set of keys on a colorful keychain. She was sporting a sun hat and far less clothing than he remembered her from last time. His nose scrunched at the smell of sun lotion.

Peering out the door, he seen tons of reddish tinted sand and a sky of orange, yellow, pink. A sea of red. A large pink moon, visible in the sky from where he stood. Where were they? When did they land?

“Ah ah ah- Not so fast Kitty. Where do you think you're going?” She asks, smirking with that type of affection that the Doctor would give him at times before snapping the door closed. It was so annoying..

Beginning to glare from the nickname, a quiet growl rose in his throat. She called him this because of the bell around his neck and the fact that she had caught him “purring” in his sleep, when OBVIOUSLY it was snoring. Duh.

“Why are you here?”

“I could ask you the same thing, pumpkin.”

His nose scrunched further, Tilting his head like a confused puppy, the way the Doctor does at times. “Why are you calling me a squash?”

“It's a form of endearment! I er- I think?”

Turning, He rolled his eyes. Oh great. Someone else who was annoying- Though… He looked.. different today. His hair was pushed back and shiney, probably with gel. He had that hideous footwear on again too, but now he was wearing a half opened blue palm tree shirt with parrots and coconuts on it. For a moment he was going to question why his shirt was half undone but saw him quickly trying to finish buttoning it up.

“Hello, Sweetie.”

“H-hi” His friend stuttered, trying to stay focused on his buttons and not the fact River was in a two piece and a small cover up tied around her waist.

“What's the rush? You act like you don't want me seeing you.”

“Oh n-No! Nothing like that! Not at all I just thought-”

River leaned in close to his face, that same smirk plastered onto her lips.

“You thought you wanted to make me work for it… Didn't you? Want me to rip it off with my teeth? You naughty boy.”

“I-..” The Doctor swallowed, looking as if he malfunctioned, like a restarting cellphone.

The Master made a fake gagging noise, rolling his eyes even harder as he pointed into his mouth.

“I thought I told you not to be rude?” Was the first thing the restarted phone said once it finished rebooting. Being scolded felt nice. All eyes in the room on him.

“What? I didn't even say anything this time.” He teased.

River smiled wider, fondly shaking her head as she handed him the small Rainbow clicky key chain. It was shaped like a slug and when you shook it, it made noise and moved in a slithering motion.

“You open that box, and it's yours, sweetie.”

“Why are you calling him sweetie?” He asked, stepping forward as If wanting attention too but she ignored him for now. She watched with a pleased grin as he took the box, looking at it, shaking it next to his ear.

“What is it?”

“Spoilers.”

“.. I hate when you say that..”

“I know. I've been having some trouble with it. The box I mean” She explains, her boyfriend now cocking a brow, pouting that the Master was getting more attention then him. If he knew one thing about River, it's that his dear Melody would never give a box to a man if she had trouble opening it. She'd just blow the lock off with one of her fancy guns.

“No you're no-”

She kissed him, grabbing his bow tie and staining his lips that bright red that she wore often. During their kiss, one of his once flat hairs stuck up, flopping over into his face.

Pulling away, he took a breath, baffled at what in the world was going on.

Completely ignoring this, as this was common whenever River came by, The Master was sitting on the floor, shoving One of the dozen keys into the hole, jiggling them around, cursing under his breath whenever they didn't work. Blinking, The Doctor smiled seeing how entertained he was, leaning in close to the woman. “What actually is in that box, River?”

“Oh you two are so much alike. Too curious for your own good.”

“What? No. We're nothing alike.”

“Yes we are. I've been saying this for eons.” the man on the floor muttered, Putting his arms up in triumph as he got the right key out of the dozen.

“What is it?” The Doctor asks, trying to peer over his shoulder.

“It's mine, that's what!” He says, taking out a box all taped up in clear cellophane but he could see the label, grinning widely to himself, keeping it close so the Doctor couldn't see. He knew he'd want to take it away. River was always bringing him treats. As many times as she made him gag, he always knew that her heels meant something good.

Glancing at River with those big puppy eyes, she giggled, taking his arm as she whispered to him. “It's a knife.”

“A what?! Why would you give him that!? You know he's-”

“Ooh hush. Let him have some fun.”

“If by fun you mean killing your parents and possibly me then sure- River why would you-”

She kissed him again.

“Mh- Thank you but you can't just keep-”

And again.

“River!” He whined

And another.

By now, he's learned not to speak or else she'd kiss him a fourth time just to shut him up. Not like it was a bad thing but he really was concerned.

“There's a good boy. Now. Is operation cat-astrophe still happening?”

For a moment or two, he seemed confused until she put her head towards the Master in which he gasped, nodding. “Oh Yes!”

“I see that Door is a check.” She mumbles, remembering how quickly he came when the door was opened.

“We're working on that. Clicky treats is a go I suppose?”

“Mmmhm. You should have seen how happy he was to see me.”

“Good good.. Just wished you would've chosen a different gift..”

“Just watch And see, sweetheart. Goodness so impatient.” She whispered.

During this conversation, nothing else mattered to the Master except biting and tearing through these 10 layers of tape. Growling, he was becoming a bit frustrated, but it only seemed to make him work harder at it, sticking out his tongue for maximum brain operation.

“Oh I love when he makes that face.”

“What face??”

“With his tongue? It's like you and your glasses.”

“What? No-”

“Yes.”

“AHA!!” He had finally ripped open the box, giggling to himself as he took his prize, quickly running off, probably to go attempt a murder.

“Hm. Well that lasted about 5 minutes…”

“How long do you think until he realizes it's bio locked?” She whispered, smirking like ever.

Staring at her, The Doctors grin grew. “Aahh I see.. you..”

“Mhm.”

“So that-”

“Yes.”

“And now?”

“Yup.. aannnd here he comes.” She could hear the incoming jingling from his bell serving it's purpose.

Coming back to them both, he was pissed. He had just tried to stab Amy and nothing happened, The blade just went inside like one of those cheap toys from the supermarket. He felt the blade. It was real, not plastic, So why wasn't it working? It wasn't fair.

“What did you do to my knife!?”

“Whatever do you mean, Pumpkin?”

“Stop calling me a squash you witch! I can't stab anybody! What kind of present is that!?”

“Did you try stabbing… Things?” River says, raising her brows in a pleased, smugness.

“Things?” Pausing for a few seconds, He soon got the biggest shit eating grin, Running away a second time. Moments later, they heard a crash, laughing, and a loud “Hey!!”

The Doctor blinked. “...He just broke your mothers vase..”

“It was a hideous vase.”

“River!”

“What? Now come on. We have some more training to do.”

Later, after the Master destroyed exactly 3 ceramic things, stabbed the table to death, ripped up all Rory's pillows, and used his new toy to cut up some cheese as a snack, He now was curious about the door again.

Sneaking towards it and looking outside like a cat that wanted to go out but was nervous he'd get scolded, he watched as the Doctor set up lounge chairs and towels on the beach.

Again the heels. Part of him became excited. He liked that clicking- But why? Since when did he like River?? He didn't. He didn't like anyone on this damned ship that he was prisoner to.

“Hi cupcake. You wanna go outside sweetpea?”

His eyebrows scrunched. “I'm not a baked goods… Or a flower. Are you insulting me?”

“Terms of endearment, dear. Remember? Anyway, Let's say you and me go outside hm?”

He looked at her with hesitance. She was being suspicious… He wasn't allowed outside. What was this? Some sort of test? Fine. He'd play their game.

“No… I'm not allowed outside.”

“Aww why not?”

“Cause..??” Was she stupid? Prisoners weren't allowed to leave. That's the whole point of his cuffs And collar. Kept on an invisible, metaphorical leash at all times.

“Well… The Doctor and I are going to sit on the beach. Do you want to come?”

The light in his eyes alone was enough to make River want to hug him to bits. Why were Time Lords so cute? Was it some sort of defense mechanism? Or was it the Feline Virus thing the Doctor told her about lingering in his genetic code?

Starting to nod, he quickly stopped, now playing with his hands. “no.. I'll get in trouble..” and just like that, that light died so soon. So short lived. Frowning, she almost felt pitiful for him. “That is true… but wait! Have you ever tried.. you know.. asking?”

“A-asking to go outside..?”

“Yes.”

“He'll just say no. Every time I get out, I get in trouble.”

“But did you ask?”

Poking his fingers together, he made a sound that sounded uncertain. It broke her heart. Now she was going to scold her husband.

“Alright.. well.. if you want to come join us outside, All you have to do is ask. Mkay?”

And she took off her heels, setting them up on the TARDIS dash only to walk out barefoot, the red sands making footprints as she went.

Standing at the door, now he was really unsure. This felt like a trap.. why would she tease him with freedom like that? Why would she give him a knife? And for the love of god- Why did he get excited when he heard her heels clicking on the TARDIS floor?

Slowly, he peeks his head out of the TARDIS, looking around the planet, The sky, the waves, the footprints she left.

“Hey!” Becoming startled, he jumped a bit, ducking back into the blue box. He wasn't entirely sure if these cuffs would electrocute him if he left or not.. even though Amy joked about them being shock bracelets… The Doctor couldn't do that..

Right?

“Do you want a Jelly worm?!” This was shouted from about 50 feet away by a man with his shirt half unbuttoned, holding a bag of candies while River slathered sunscreen all over him.

“I think theyre called Gummy worms, dear.” She mumbled.

“I'm certain they're called jelly worms.”

“Oh yeah? Read the package.”

Looking at the pack, He pouted. “Jelly worms sound cooler.”

Blinking, The Master wondered if he was talking to him or someone else.

“Me?”

“Yeah! You want a ‘Gummy worm'?!”

“What’s a gummy worm?! Can... I come outside?” This was asked in speaking tone rather then a shout.

“What!?”

“What's a gum-! You know what.. nevermind.” he mumbled, frowning as he stepped a foot on the sand, wincing, expecting his wrists to send electromagnetic shocks through his arms. But nothing happened.

Discovering this, he ran out of the TARDIS, circling round it before coming towards the other two, grinning.

“What's a gummy worm?”

“Its a jelly worm.”

“Oh! Yeah. Gummy Worm sounds stupid.”

He mumbled, being given a few of the candies. Glancing at River, The Doctor had a smug look, wiggling his eyebrows at her as she rolled her eyes, smiling.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah.” He shoved one in his mouth. “I think-” another “-they're called jelly worms.” A third one.

“That's what I said! See?”

“Everyone else calls them Gummy worms because they're made with xanthan gum.”

“Like Xanax?”

“What!? No!” She laughed. “Goodness. You had some fun as Prime Minister didn't you?”

“What's Xanax?? Is that a fancy drink?” The Doctor asked, shoving some worms in his mouth as the two looked at each other as if mentally playing rock paper scissors to see which unlucky soul got to teach the Doctor about recreational drugs.

“Seeya-” He said, taking off.

“Ah you gotta be kitten me.” She smirks and the Doctor gives her a look as if to say ‘Really?’ Only to giggle too.

“That's just claw-ful!”

River gave a chuckle before sighing.

“Well.. looks like it's just you and me, sweetheart..”

“Fur-ever?” He held out his pinky, smirking as he raised his eyebrows a few times. River giggled, rolling her eyes only to take the pinky, bringing the intertwined fingers up to her lips.

“Fur-ever. Till the end?”

“Until the end of time and more, my darling.” He would never be able to forget her.. not ever. How could he?

A few times, The Master would run away, doing circles, Zoomies as river called it but never seemed to get too far from the TARDIS, returning when offered more Jelly worms, each time recieving a praise and a snack for coming back to them.

Now he was becoming bored of the laps, even going as far as putting his toes curiously into the ocean, realizing that it was warm. Like a water bottle left out in the sun. This displeased him. He was already hot from his laps around the beach, he didn't want hot water all over his body. Hot was an understatement. If it were hot like the baths he'd not mind but it was the gross kind of warm. The kind that felt yucky on your skin. God he hated water..

It was then he realized that outside of the TARDIS he had free will, coming over to lift the Doctor's chair, dumping him over only to run away, manically laughing, giggling almost.

“What the-!?”

“Catch me if you dare!” He yelled, Dashing off, further and further away. A rush of adrenaline and freedom taking over him. This seemed like the start of a fun game… that was until he had run so far that he was panting and the TARDIS looked like a tiny dot from here.

Where was everyone on this planet anyway? He'd come all this way and not seen a single person. Not a hint of a town, and definitely not a city. Part of him cursed the Doctor for taking him to a deserted solar system with no one to play with- and on top of that, For not chasing after him. He knew how this game worked, didn't he? One ran, the other chased. It's been like this for thousands of years.

So why not now? Was it because of that woman? The daughter of Amelia Pond? This still confused him greatly. He understood the concept of time travel, duh, but what confused him is why her parents would let her marry A dingus like the Doctor. I mean really? Why did she lower her standards?*

Eventually, curiosity killed the cat. He ran as far as he could, trying to find any forms of life, only finding himself alone. Completely and utterly abandoned it seemed. This puzzled him. Why would the Doctor want to come here? There was nothing but a waste land of sand.

Later, When he came back into the TARDIS painting, sweating, and whining from all that walking and running. He shut the door, collapsing on the floor as he laid there, feeling her cool air coming up from the grates and her cold metal against his skin.

Just because Gallifreyans were resistant to heat didn't mean that going out in the blazing sun with a black hoodie was a good idea. Especially not when there wasn't anywhere to go. Not even a tree in sight.

“Well well well. Look what the cat dragged in.” The curly haired woman says, Smiling as she sat next to the Doctor on the torn up sofa that they apparently had moved into the TARDIS control room. (For whatever reason)

They probably had just finished kissing (or got interrupted) seeing as there was lipstick smeared over the Doctors lips and he doubted heavily that the doctor applied it himself… He wasn't THAT much of an idiot… He knew how to appropriately apply lipstick.. even he knew that.

“Why didn't you tell me there wasn't anything out there!?”

“We figured you'd find out for yourself sooner or later” The Doctor says, Scooting over, Trying to wipe the lipstick off of him only to smear it onto his hand and cuff.

“Who's we? Come're baabbyyy” River coed, putting her arms out to him.

Without a second to think about it, he began to scramble over to her only, crawling the few feet only to stop dead in his tracks. What the fuck was he doing? And why?

Sure he's laid between them multiple times to purposely frustrate them, but now it seemed as if they were welcoming him with literal open arms. Why? Cocking a brow, He himself was now frustrated, why were they being so… Kind.. to him? For what? His thinking soon sufficed when called for again.

“Come on. Come to mommy. What did that mean man do to you, hm?” She coed.

“I am not! He's just… bad!”

“Oh he's not bad! He's bored.”

"Yeah! There's a difference!" He awnsered And just like that, in her lap he went, being sure to push the Doctor away from her with his feet, trying to be a menace as much as possible, laying his head in her lap as he stared up at her. Petting his head, she giggled, talking to him further to make him feel pampered and praised. If there was one thing she knew, The Master adored being worshipped and given attention. Ignoring him made things 10 times worse, so she's learned that if she petted him long enough he would go to sleep and she could talk to her dear husband some more before the little gremlin woke up.

“What did he do, hm?? So cruel. Leaving you out there all alone?” River smirked as he already was droopy lidded, nodding softly along with the words.

“I did not. It's his fault for running off.”

“Oooh he's done nothing wrong.”

“... It's really hard to teach him when you keep enabling him, love..”

“That's why it's called Paw-sitive reinforcement, Doctor.” She said this in a sing-songy voice, Letting him get comfy as he turned over, Subconsciously nuzzling up to her hands and stomach.

Truth be told, he could care less what they were talking about right now. He was far too tired to listen to them bicker, using it as white noise, hoping it would drown out the drums that pounded in his head every waking moment of existence.

While they were faint, they were still there. At the back of his mind, like trying to smash through a 2 foot thick wall of ice, bound to break eventually, but right now, they gave him comfort. A constant reminder of who he was and that if anything was real? It was the pounding.

The warmth of her hands also gave him comfort, running her pointed red nails through his bleached blonde and trailing up and down his back through his hoodie.

A few minutes pass and the Doctor is now staring at them with a fond look, a shallow pang of jealousy but he wasn't sure about who. He was jealous of River for being able to get HIS best friend so cuddly and he was jealous of the master for cuddling up to HIS wife. It made him want to take him from her, put him on his lap and let him sleep there instead, but also shove him off the couch and take his place. God this was so difficult. How did humans do this relationship thing? It was so… annoying yet.. wonderful! He wouldn't change it for the world. He was so sleepy and… beautiful.

“You're staring sweetie..”

The voice echoed through his brain once, then twice before he looked up. “Huh?”

“You're staring again… Don't worry. You'll get your turn.”

“When?”

“Oooh so impatient.”

“No I mean- I.. When can I hold him?”

Her eyes widened, not aware that she had been hogging, let alone that he would want a turn at all. “Well… You can have him now if you'd like.”

“I..” Man this was embarrassing. “I think I'd like that.”

Carefully, They moved him from one lap to another, Which at first led to a protest of whining and gentle clawing**, Assuming he was falling off the couch.

“Shh shh shh. No honey. You're okay. You're just fine.” She whispered, pulling his hands away, trying to keep him from sitting up by putting her hand up under the thick sweater, scratching his back ever so gently the way he enjoyed before.

Letting out a sigh of relief, His shoulders dropped, curling up the way he liked in the Doctor's lap instead, a deep rumbling beginning from him. “.. He's so tired..”

“From all that running around, probably.” She whispered, enjoying his purring.

“No.. He's exhausted. His last regeneration went a bit..wonky. I don't even know if….If..” He trailed off, the way he did when he wanted to stop talking about something instead of when he forgot what he was saying.

“What? Cat got your tongue?”

Snickering, He shook his head. “No... I just.. even Time Lords can only take so much and..”

River knew. He watched him die. He burnt his body. He gave him a proper death ***ceremony- well.. about as proper as you could without others knowing.

“So it's a good thing you're taking care of him. Isn't it?”

“That's the thing. It's not that he can't do it himself, it's just that.. He's reckless..”

“Oh and I suppose we aren't?”

“River.. I don't.. I thought I was the last one for so long. I..” He took a breath, swallowing. She could see the pain and fear in his eyes.

“I can't go back to that.. Hell. For the last few months, I've been spraying him with-”

“Doctor..” She muttered a warning, noticing that the purring had stopped, but he continued.

“Catmint tea just so he'd calm down enough to-”

“You've been spraying me WITH TEA!? THIS ENTIRE TIME?!”

The woman smiled innocently, seeing the murderous glares.

“Whoops! Cats out of the bag.”

“River-! Not now!”

*just wait until he finds out she married Jack Harkness while he had the doctor caged up LOL

** clutching/ trying to hold on, he does not have retractable nails.

*** Like Torvic's. Thats why it hurt so bad.

[redbleedingrose]

okay so, cass and rhys definitely squish your stomach as a form of appreciation and affection to prove how beautiful it is. azriel loves your tummy too, but he’s more discreet, giving you extra kisses on it and rubbing it mindlessly while you relax together. he’s not ashamed to do it in pubic either.

omg they all love to see their mate in bodycon dresses, your curves and rolls looking so luscious in them that none of them can help but buy you them in every color. and you can bet your ass that with every male, it’ll be on your floor by the end of the night.

if you ever worry about your weight, they would all have different approaches. rhysand would try his best to make you see how beautiful you are, fucking you in front of the mirror and praising your body while on his knees for you every day until you knew how beautiful you were. cassian would kiss and snuggle up to you, telling you how sexy you are and what parts exactly he loved about your plump figure. azriel would be more emotionally understanding, and try to talk through it, explaining how absolutely stunning you truly are and figuring out the deep root of your insecurities. he’d physically try to make you feel better also by kissing you and telling you everything he loves aswell. they’d all fly you around after, showing you that no matter what, yoy’d never be too heavy to hold up and fly for hours.

i think they’d have different favorite parts of their mate, rhys is def a thigh guy but loved every part of you endlessly, cassian is a simple ass man but your tummy is definitely competing with your ass in his heart these days and azriel is a boob guy.

- 🌷

Hiiiiiiiii 🌷

Sucha pretty emoji to use!!! Also I am so excited for this plus size reader x bat boys because we could all use some more inclusivity around here and I just know these males love love love thicc girlys! I basically made this poly!batboy x plus size fem!Reader so hopefully that is okay but can also be read seperately if you have a preferance for one male.

they loveeeee rubbing your tummy and squishing it. Just such an unconcious thing to do at first, and to be honest, you were insecure about it at first. No one had ever loved you the way you were, and it took a long time to accept yourself. But the bat boys love every inch of you, every soft curve, every stretch mark. And they fucking love your tummy. Maybe its an illyrian thing because frl it makes them go a bit feral!!!!!

Like you know how the greeks used to adore chubby females because it was a sign of like richness and also fertility? The baser instinct part of these bat boys has their minds going wild with dirty thoughts.

Back to my original point, when they aren't shy about loving on your belly... when they aren't shy about kissing it and looking at you with the widest, most adoring eyes... it shifts something in you. You gain more confidence around them and you aren't afraid to show off your curves whereever they sit because you know the bat boys will love it.

And I think you are so right about Cass and Rhys being so much more open and obvious about it because they are the kinds of males to shower you with affection in any setting and make sure you feel loved and make sure the people of Valeris see you the way that they see you. And I think Az would be more subtle with it, but not because he is ashamed. But because he is super protective over you and does not want to share at all in any capacity. In his eyes, the public isn't deserving enough to see your perfect body and they are lucky to even catch a glimpse of you. Constant glares and brooding occurs from the male whenever you are out in public because he doesn't want males or females to be staring at you for too long.

PUH LEASEEEEEEE

yes to the bodycon dresses!!!

Also you are lucky if you get to wear a little short nighty at home. These males like you walking around practically naked showing off your curves.

And you already know they are buying you things left and right just for you to wear. And you know how sometimes with plus size girlys, some things are just a hit or miss with clothes and jewlery and accessories???

NEVER with them. Absolutely never.

Every single thing they buy you fits you perfectly and it practically has all the males and females around on their knees for you.

Like I think you are gonna be the most fashionable person in Valeris and everyone wants to be you or be like you or want you. You are the IT girl.

And not even just for Valeris. But also for Prythian!!!

Lucien is practically on his knees begging for your slightest attention

Obviously pisses off the bat boys because you belong to them and no one else but alas they cannot blame the autumn male. Because just look at you???

You are the most stunning, most kind, most beautiful, most intelligent, most elegant female they have ever met in their lifetime.

I also like to think each bat boy likes to buy you very specific things. Rhys is always buying you dresses and clothes that fit to your body that he know will look so amazing on you, even though he thinks everything will look good on you. Cassian is buying his precious female shoes left and right, anything he wants to see you wearing, anything that would match your clothes, anything that would bring out the color of your beautiful eyes, anything that would make your beautiful full legs stand out. He also loves buying you accessories like purses or sunglasses or just anything really. Anything you want he or the other bat boys are rushing to get. Azriel is so fucking observant. He is getting you the most expensive most stunning most meaningful jewelry in Prythian. Anytime he goes out on a mission, he is bringing you back gold or silver pieces the most brightest stones.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay tbh your mates have helped you so fucking much with your body image issues. It was so hard to like your body before you knew them because you were constantly judging yourself and comparing yourself to all your friends who had fuck buddies or lovers and you didn't. It made you feel like there was something wrong with you.

Mother, were you wrong.

Sometimes being patient really does fucking pay off

Because these males ruined you for anyone else. No one loves like they do. All of them fucking adore you, love to show you off and compliment you.

Seriously, you are constantly blushing under their heated gazes and dirty remarks of how they would love to rip your clothes off and have their way with you in public.

Safe to say, you haven't had a bad day in a while when it comes to your looks.

But that doesn't mean you don't occassionally have bad days. And when you do?? Your mates take care of you.

I've mentioned before Cassian is so emotionally intelligent. He is the first to notice you having an off day.

He notices that you are pushing your breakfast around with your fork more than you are eating, and he made your favorite so why aren't you eating more??

And he just pulls you into his lap and playing with your hair and is squeezing your ass, waist, and hips gently, "What's wrong pretty girl? Why aren't you eating?" while sending loving strokes down the bond.

And maybe you try to deny it at first but he won't let it go so you break down and open up to him that you just aren't feeling yourself today. That you sometimes feel like you aren't good enough for your mates.

And he immediately shuts you down right then and there and is just so sad because how is it possible you think you aren't good enough. If anything, they aren't good enough for you.

So he just spends the rest of the morning, whispering everything that he loves about you with the most truth in his voice you have ever heard. And he kisses every inch of your body and slowly and gently makes love to you right there on the kitchen floor.

And you feel better, but Cass still feels sad so he informs Rhys and Az and essentially the three of the bat boys devise a plan to make you feel good about yourself.

Rhys finds you later that afternoon and snatches you by the hips, winnowing you into your shared bedroom, and is stripping you bare and is having his way with you in front of the mirror, fucking into you from behind, hand wrapped around your neck and making you watch his cock disappear into your cunt from behind. And the entire time, he is whispering in his hoarse voice how stunning you are, how sexy you are, how feral you make him, Cass, and Az.

"Look at how pretty you look cumming around me." and "So fucking beautiful little love" and "You are a fucking goddess" and "You are the most beautiful star in our lives"

And then he flips you onto your back and tongues your cunt, sending adoration and love down the bond and creating mental images of how you look taking him and its just...

well...

Anyways you do feel better after that as well. Still, you are a little sad.

And thats when Az steps in

And he just pulls you down onto the bed and cuddles you super close, like he is yanking you on top of him. And you protest at first, but his sharp glare and tight grip on your thighs stops you straight in your tracks.

And so you just lay your head onto his chest and listen to his heart beat as he massages the knots in your shoulders and hugs you close wrapping his wings around you both into a warm caccoon, pressing the ocassional kiss into your hair.

And his shadows just dance around you both, encircling you in the shadowsinger's darkness. And its safe. It feels safe. To be there with him. To be so close to him that you can physically feel your bond vibrating with his love.

And he lets you explain everything. How you didn't like the way your body looked before them. How you really struggled to find peace with yourself because since childhood, everyone, even your family, has been trying to change you. How it is only a recent thing that you feel comfortable in your own skin. How you don't feel the need to suck in your tummy anymore because you know that your mates won't judge you for it, but in fact, love and crave it. How its just been an adjustment and its gonna take time.

And he listens. He listens in the most perfect way. Reassuring you every second that he is there, that he loves you with little pulses down the bond and soft butterfly kisses all over your face, from your plump cheeks to forehead to nose to lips to eye lids.

And then he opens up about his own insecurities. How he knows how you feel, at least on some level, because before you, before the bond, he hated how his hands looked. He hated who he was. He hated how he was known as darkness incarnate. He hated how people immediately feared him and his shadows.

And you changed that with your constant hand holding and kissing of his hands and constant playing with his hands. How you were always so excited to see him whenever he would come back from a mission and how you would jump up from where you were cuddling Rhys and Cass to grab him so lovingly by his hands and pull him into a cuddle pile with the other bat boys. And how you never feared him, in fact, the first time you met, you giggled at his shadows who played with your hair and wrapped around your wrists and ankles with cool carresses.

And he agrees that it will take time, but that him and Rhys and Cass will be there for you every step of the way. That they love and adore every inch of you. That they don't want you to change yourself or be anyone different because you are the literal definition of perfection just the way you are.

And then he just cuddles you close until it is nearly sunset. And then he mumbles into your hair, “C’mon my love, its time to go” 

And you are confused but you go with it 

And he takes you out onto the balcony where Rhys is leaning against the railing, smirking down at you and Cass is standing there with a huge grin and a basket in his hands. And you’re about to ask whats going on, but you are cut off by your screaming laughs cuz Az is throwing you over his shoulder like you weigh nothing and is shooting up into the sky. 

And the bat boys just take turns passing you off in the middle of the sky like you weigh like a grain of rice to them until they reach the meadow in between the mountains where they have a little picnic set up for you. And then they take turns feeding you and kissing you and holding you and complimenting you. 

And then fucking you 

A/N: This is not edited sorry about that and I hope yall enjoy! 

[handmedownpocketpussy]

So I read the Witching Hour... I knew Anne Rice was typically solid when it came to her political views, but wow this entire book is just a class commentary; it's das capital but horny as shit and with an incubus as an antagonist.

On its face it is just a spooky scary story about witches and their roots as disenfranchised feral wizards who, back in the day, accidentally called on a super powerful magic being, thereby turning into people who are absolutely corrupted by that power, as far as setups it's standard witchy fare, right?

But I love that the entire thing hinges on riches and money As SOON as the Mayfair family got money they used it to buy their way into the upper class, and that money 'kept coming back to them' maintaining them in the upper crust

As SOON as they became part of the upper class, they indulged in the fast track to winning capitalism (which at the time was, of course, owning slaves and a plantation, and later morphed into playing the stock market and owning land in various key places) Anne Rice really said 'subtlety? I don't know her' and I love that for her

So within the story it's made clear that the Mayfair family history, and therefore ability to know how this all started, was lost-- each subsequent generation was seduced by the $$$ bought by their last names into not investigating it further, just sort of benefiting from the endless fountain of riches, and seeing that quite-literally-haunted history as just fun facts about the family and how interesting it was but none of the modern Mayfairs have the motivation to investigate, to know more, because the ignorant rich are the rich who don't feel guilty about where their gains came from.

With Rowan, it deals with someone who is set up explicitly as someone who: doesn't know about the Mayfair family, doesn't care about sullying the name or not, is supposedly unable to sacrifice a single living being to help untold thousands, and is generally well enough off that she doesn't need/want more money. And yet, upon entering the deadly miasma that is the bourgeois (in this case the Mayfairs accepting her into the fold) she is instantly and inexorably succumbing to the quagmire of complete and total weath, power, and false sense of community. She is quite literally seduced by it, this strong, stone faced protagonist who seems unshakable at first a literal one-woman-island introduced from the decks of her single-handed command of her massive deep sea vessel is taken in and played like a fiddle because that's what wealth does

I think its quite a good book, even if it drags in the middle-- and yeah, is a bit dated, but in the end it's about hubris and class and power and even the weird quirks of the book showing black people only being mentioned in passing or as set dressing feels incredibly deliberate when the entire book revolves around the white landed gentry, in fact I think because the book is a few decades old now your biases of a 80s era book feed into where you think it will go vs where it does go

So yeah fun read, extremely horny (i mean duh it's anne rice), and a solid commentary on things, I'm shocked it got made into a show I'm not surprised i never heard of this show because i cannot imagine a 90s spooky scary telenovela about horny ghosts going well lmao Oooh i see there's tags for this subsection of the population, well hello! I am plopping this in your fandom I'd love to hear your thoughts!

[thehollowprince]

I am going to need Louis and Daniel to wreck all holy hell next week.

Burn that coffin to the ground. Something because that last episode was too much pain not to go somewhere.

Well, like Raglan James said to Daniel...

"You fear Armand? You should fear the other one!"

I want Louis to go absolutely feral in his take down of the Parisian coven. And let's be completely honest, he was begat by Lestat AFTER the Brat Prince met a certain ancient vampire who fed him her blood. The only two vampires in all of Paris who are stronger than him, who could potentially stop him, are Armand and Lestat, and we know they won't.

But more importantly, I want there to be a build-up to the coven's demise. I want Louis to fulfill Claudia's last request in regards to the audience, and just pick them off one-by-one. Let the coven notice that their audience is dropping and that someone is coming for them before he delivers the killing blow.

I generally root for the good guys who chose compassion over vengeance, but sometimes a little retribution is good for the soul.

[whatitshouldvebeen]

Hiii so I’ve been really into Coriolanus Snow lately 👀 and I was gonna ask if you could write a version of the end where Lucy Gray runs into the wilderness to leave Snow but Snow catches up to Lucy Gray and his possessiveness over her becomes worse after that moment. Maybe he incapacitates her to make sure she can never leave him again. Also I love love love your writing 🫶

Writing this makes me want to write more in first person, Coriolanus is absolutely off his rocker. I might continue it depending on it's reception!

A Bird in the Hand

Contains: blood, pure insanity, and physical harm

•••

I just shot Lucy Gray. 

My ears are ringing and it still isn't loud enough to drown out the mockingjays.

She stumbled here. I swear, I saw it. Venom sends pain all through my arm. Am I going to die? How could she do this to me?

“Lucy Gray!” I don't even realize I'm screaming her name. 

It's too early for katniss. The leaves are still wet, sticking to my hands and knees as I search for proof that…

I just shot Lucy Gray.

I hear her everywhere and nowhere. My beautiful songbird. You're hurt. 

Red on the ground, a splatter here and there. Leaves crushed in my hands. Spread on my gun. 

How many kills before I lose track?

“Lucy Gray!” My throat is sore and my heart is beating out of my chest. I scour the ground like a dog. Desperate. Feral. A scuff here, a stumble there.

The ringing gets louder. The birds are a cacophony of her. It's beautiful, it's maddening. Just like,

“Lucy Gray!” I scream as I chase her trail. Her blood is my lifeline. Why did she make me do this? 

Then, through the madness, 

“Corio…” 

A pained whisper, softer than wind through grass. There's a tangle of roots, a splatter of blood, and a torn piece of fabric.

My heart beats twice as fast as I race down the hill, sliding over soggy leaves, tangled thorns digging into my skin. The venom reached my heart and it's spreading everywhere, a wildfire in my veins.

There she is.

Spread about the fallen leaves—wavy black hair, bright dress now stained with blood, skin drained of its warm hue—a mosaic of macabre colors.

“LUCY GRAY!” My voice cracks as I race to her fallen form. She's so beautiful, my angel. 

Her eyelids flutter when I pull her into my arms. Fragile little bird. I brush her hair from her sweaty forehead and press my fingers against her neck. Her pulse is so faint, cold dread quenches the fire in my veins.

I search for the source of the blood. A hole in her calf, leaking still. Her dress is already torn, what's one more tear? I rip off a length of fabric and tie it beneath her knee.

“You can't leave me, Lucy Gray,” I whisper, cradling her close.

Her eyes flutter again and meet mine, hazed with pain. I don't hear her speak, but I feel her question sear into my brain. 

Why?

“Why? You know why, Lucy Gray. You always knew. You belong to me, but I don't belong out here with you. I never have. You know what I did to save you. I love you, why don't you love me enough to forgive me?”

She doesn't respond. Her eyes are vacant, staring up at the mockingjays that rain torment from above.

The venom in my veins is subsiding now, or perhaps integrating with my blood. I can still save us.

I rise from my knees, holding my beautiful Lucy Gray. 

If I can forgive her, surely she will forgive me. We have both hurt each other, but love conquers all—right?

Eventually I reach the cabin. I lay her on the bed, and press a kiss to her forehead. I need to find help, and I know she can't possibly leave me in this condition. It's ironic how, in this moment, I feel more secure in our love. 

If I didn't love her, I wouldn't have saved her. She needs to stop running from me. If she had only stayed where I could see her, I would have never needed to shoot her. 

A cool serenity washes over me as I look down at her weakened form. This is better for us, isn't it? She's so beautiful, she needs me so desperately. Yes, I need her to need me. 

I don't flinch as I approach her bedside. We need this, don't we? We need stability, and we can only have it if I can keep her safely under my control. And in order to do that, she has to stop leaving me.

I trace my hand down her bloodied leg, to her thin and fragile ankle. I can do this with my bare hands, can't I? Yes, it'll be easy. She's a bird, their tiny bones snap like twigs. 

One deep breath.

CRACK!

She doesn't even flinch. Her foot hangs at an unnatural angle.

Once more, for good measure. One hand on her heel, the other over the arch of her delicate foot. 

CRUNCH!

Her foot is mangled now, twisted, her tiny bones splintered like so many fragments of wood. 

A small smile flits over my lips. 

No one said love wasn't painful. 

[peanutbutterex]

🔪 gimme all your Roach thoughts

🐈‍⬛️ Frenchie too.

My two favorite characters aside from Ed!!!

Ok to start off with Roach. In an ofmd discord server i am it but has sadly died, I once got told I was protective of Roach. And I mean, this man is a world class chef in my mind and I see him as needing food to be perfect, so I will defend him on that. And with season two, he invented peanut paste, or peanut butter, which is what my url is named after!

Also his crazed love of torture is so lovable to me. I love a crazed character, and even rooted for him to be able to torture the hostages because he wouldn’t go all the way. And how excited he was to cut off Lucius’s finger was priceless.

He also has some pf the best one-liners. “Come back, this is all a dream, come back!”, “knives are knives, meat’s meat” “mm we’re tender as hell” “we eat, but how often do we taste” and those are just the ones that come to mind now. He is so funny and chaotic I absolutely adore him and Samba being such a gem definitely adds to it.

Oh Frenchie, where do I begin with Frenchie. The fact that the first piece of art that wasn’t a sketch from memory I did for OMFD was of Frenchie says a lot in of itself (should I post it here? I don’t think I did). I will say I am so sad as a witch with 3 cats that he would be afraid of me because he is someone I would love to be friends with!!!

To start off, I love his songs. I have the words to “To Death We Go” (the full version) memorized and have sang it a lot. Also the fact that he was willing to play his lute for Ed’s song is iconic!!!

This man is also so smart??? Like the ability to think on the fly and even more think of scams on the fly is soo impressive he needs so much more credit. Also he is the kind of guy who is always aware of what is going on. He is the one who asked Ed if the crew was going to live or die, he is the one who found the invitation to the fancy party, and unlike Stede’s first reaction was completely supportive of Ed after he got mocked at said party. Where Stede said “How could you?” Frenchie said “they’re such dicks about spoons!”. Not to mention he almost definitely helped Stede get the information necessary in order for Stede to get the aristocrats to turn on each other. This guy has such street and emotional smarts that he is such an amazing addition to the cast and why I wanted him to fill Lucius’s role for Ed in season 2.

In season 2 I was a bit disappointed that we did not get to see this supportive, aware, and emotionally intelligent part of his character as much, but I understand why. Ed was in such a state that Frenchie did not know the reasons behind and did not want to get killed, so he did not try to support Ed as much, which makes sense for his character. I feel awful that he felt he needed to lock away his trauma in a box in his mind because of how unhealthy that is, but I also am aware that the atmosphere of Ed’s ship at the start of season two was not the kind of place to talk it through as a crew, so I understand why he did that too. Still, he had enough of a heart to try and help Izzy instead of killing him when Ed shot him despite how awful Izzy had been to all of them in the past, which is commendable. And these traits that Frenchie has makes so much sense why Ed chose him to be the new first mate, along with how Frenchie has been supportive of Ed in the past.

I also find Frenchie’s superstitions to be kinda funny and cute. His explanation of women having crystals in their bodies is iconic, as is his fear of cats. It is also so endearing how he channeled his fear of cats, making the most iconic flag of the revenge in season 1, it being the one bloodied with Nigel’s blood and used by the British as a symbol of the revenge, using a witch costume for his costume in the fuckery in s1e6 with Wee John along as his cat, and then having a feral cat on his jacket and the new flag of the revenge in season 2. As a cat enthusiast myself, I love the cat motif with Frenchie and what it means to him. God I love Frenchie’s character so much, and although I do think Olu deserved to be captain after he was basically elected as one in season 1, my love of Frenchie makes me so happy that he is the new captain of the revenge at the end of season 2.

Now with both of these characters together, I personally see them as besties, along with Wee John. Their interactions with each other are so sweet and fun I only wish we got to see them play off of each other more in the show. While I personally ship Frenchie more with Wee John and Roach more with Buttons (i am sitting on a whole manifesto for this ship i just need to find the right time to post it), I do get very happy when I see ship art of these two.

I am sorry this is probably much more than you expected but I love these characters so much and I don’t get to talk about them enough so I had to get all of my thoughts out there!!

[scribe-cas]

9 People Tag

Thank you @squarebracket-trick for the tag!!

These little ask game things are so fun and I’m starting to get her hang of them-

Tagging (with no pressure, of course): @hallwriteblr @rbbess110 @covenscribe @scribe-of-stories @dyrewrites @bloomibee @lilac-honey @at-thezenith @antihell

Three ships:

Radiodust (I will ship the asexual with the hooker and they WON’T fuck)

My book series OTP (they will never be together in canon again)

Any of my OCs X Any of my mutuals/friends’ OCs (yes I am wholeheartedly serious I cherish spontaneous crack ships with my life)

Currently listening:

uuuh it was some remix of Pitbull’s “Hotel Room Service” (i have two characters who play Just Dance and imagining them to that brings me to hysterics) because I was stuck cleaning the house today

Last movie:

NIMONA. OH MY GOD.

I’ve been a fan since 4th grade when I read the comics for the first time. To see it made into a movie- I can’t. I’m in love.

Plus it’s hilarious because ever since I’ve made friends watch it, they’ve been like “it’s you” “they made a movie about you” and one time I made a joke about being a Nimona cosplayer and my best friend of almost 6 years (my favorite person ever) looked me dead in the eyes and said “wym cosplayer, that’s just how you look” and I’ve never been one hit KOed so fast. Anyways I am normal and regular about the gender movie of all time.

Carrying on-

Currently reading:

Like 5 WIPs that friends of mine have been gracious enough to share with me. I am in love with all of their writing but one in particular who’s finally started to pursue writing as a possible career (they have tumblr if you’re reading this yes I’m talking about you ily hi) has absolutely blown me away with their artistic talent. They have a way with words and a story that I am feral for and rooting for.

Also, my old rough drafts!

Along with Silver (Chris Wooding), Asylum (Madeline Roux), and A Court Of Thorns and Roses (Sarah J Mass).

Currently watching:

The save 5 YouTube videos. Over and over. Someone please save me from myself /lh

Currently Consuming:

Uhhh the answer is unfortunately nothing-

I’m hungry but too tired to get out of bed so I haven’t eaten yet-

Hopefully later tonight

Currently Craving:

Creamy horchata. Like the kind you make with sweetened condensed milk. The good shit.

Last thing researched (for writing purposes):

Depression and the different coping mechanisms that go along with types of trauma. (Ie what coping mechanisms go along with what feelings that come from a traumatic event)

Current Obsession:

Both Nimona and my WIPs! I have two writing projects that I’m just getting back into, and I’m really really excited about that.

(If anyone is interested in them let me knoW /lh)

Anyways yes

Go forth and tag more people, my wonderful morbos

[miabebe]

Hi,

Well, I saw your post about seventeen camp series and I'm just here to tell you that I have already read just the prologue and the character descriptions multiple times because of how excited I am. I'll start off with the fact that the last line of the prologue drove me absolutely crazy. I can't say my thoughts did not take a turn with that statement, and well, I can't wait to see what her actual duty will be. Another thing is her reaction to cheol's proposal for her to live in his house until she has her own, like girl, I totally understand, I would not know how to behave if I were in that situation either. Then again, jihoon knowing that she's thirsty,god, that is another situation that would make me draw a blank. As for who she should end up with, idk, right now, I can't tell but honestly I wouldn't mind whoever she ends up with(although, the unhinged part of me thinks she should just end up with all 13 them). As for the, ahem, ahem, the threesome, well, I love them all the same but god, I'm a sucker for the 95 liners, them being such menaces and together at that? Oh, that would make me feral, as if I'm not already, but yeah(I think they'd be so mean, from the prologue, I can tell they're insane and I, I'm gonna stop right there). I'm extremely curious as to how she'll contribute, how their relationship will continue, and the lawsuit, I cannot even speculate what it is. I want to see them fight, the training and damn, all the tension. Also, how deprived are all of them for them to react like that to her drinking water? That is also something I'm curious about, and well, just how insane they are(both irl and in the be-). I might go and say that this might become my favorite work of yours. If I had to root for specific members, I would say, the 95 liners, for obvious reasons. Overall, I'm just very excited for this one. Hope you have a happy start to this writing journey and enjoy yourself while writing it 😊.

Hi again! I'm happy to see you in my inbox once more <3

Ahhh multiple times? Thank youu, I'm glad at least someone is as excited for this as I am! And hmm all thirteen of them, interesting, only time will tell!

Ooh yes that last line of the prologue was to intentionally set up the idea for ot13 hehe but we've got lot of things to cover like you said her duty on camp, her relationship with each member, her own growth as a newly discovered demigod, the lawsuit especially - we've got lots of plot coming up cause I sadly cannot function without plot and do something pwp so there is loads to cover in the demi-verse

But ahhh the infamous 95 liners (although that would make it a foursome but who's to say I don't have 4 or more planned already) and since OC is starting off living with Cheol so I guess we'll see how that goes hehe and yes they are highly deprived - you'll know why when the chapters start droppinggg

Omggg it would make me the happiest if you love the Camp Seventeen series - the planning for this has been on for months and I'm sure with wonderful people like you looking forward to it, I'm gonna have the best time writing!

[gffa]

You all should be so embarrassed for me, I wrote like two thousand words of what can basically be summed up as, "So what kind of fic do you read: Anything with Dick Grayson in it!" and I was only halfway done.  Absolutely humiliating, I would have exposed myself so bad.  (This answer isn't going to be much better.) I would love any and all fic recs anyone has for me, but be warned:  I'm really not kidding about how I would shove every other Bat off a roof to get to fic of my most specialiest guy of all time, especially if it involves his complicated relationship with Bruce.  I am a Dick Grayson stan to my very goddamned core, he is 90% of what I read in this fandom. I'm sometimes open to other stuff!  Especially if you have god-tier writing and a banger summary of something that sounds really hilarious (though, I tend to shy away from cracky, like even Wayne Family Adventures borders on too cracky for me sometimes, as lovely as it is), like "Jason adopts Tim until he's of legal age because he can't emancipate himself, meanwhile they get along like two cats in a sack", I have read two of those and they're both joy. Or if anyone has TimKon recs, I have shipped them since I was a wee thing, I'm certainly not stopping now, but I don't know where to find a good place to start with them, trying to skim through the tag has been overwhelming. I'll give anything with really sharp banter a shot, though!  I am weak for a well-written quip. Beyond that, I read almost entirely genfic with ships more in the background than anything.  I have a few NOTPs--like you, I can't do any of the other Bats with Bruce or Alfred.  I also mostly can't do any of the Batkids with each other, my brain just won't wrap around any of it, the one exception being that I'll occasionally read Dick/Jason when I'm in the mood for Jason to get dicked down (ha ha get it), otherwise I'm generally aligned with what you'd see in the comics themselves.  (Dick/Babs is my hardcore OTP, but I'm fine with them being together or not together, so long as a fic isn't actively anti-Dick/Babs.) I can run the gamut from fluff to angst, but I prefer a certain amount of teeth to it (exception: when Dick is a baby bat, then I will go full fluff, like the softest thing you have ever read in your life, Bruce cuddling with a tiny child who is trying to climb onto his shoulders and do a flip will have me clutching my reader to my chest and cooing) and the more rooted in comic events/characterization a fic is, the more I'm interested.  (Exception:  Battison being given a tiny feral circus child to take care of is hilarious and I want a thousand fics of it.) I tend towards the middle ground when it comes to characterization--I like them to be a bit of a mess, but also I view Dick Grayson as someone who genuinely likes himself and has a reasonable amount of self-esteem.  He might struggle with accepting others' help or prioritizing himself or that they want him around, but I think he honestly likes who he is and likes himself and is reasonably quick to get back on his feet after being a mess.  I think he has a firestorm tornado of rage in him if you hit the right buttons, but that he's also someone who thrives on emotional connection, who chooses kindness and love because he believes in them.  I like Dick being a bit of a mess, especially an angry mess, occasionally have some self-esteem issues, but that there's a foundation of emotional competence. I like almost any tropes (de-age my special guy so he's even more special! time travel fix-it yesssss! Dick & Damian were an even better Batman & Robin than Dick & Bruce, NOBODY TELL ANYONE THAT I ADMITTED THAT OUT LOUD) and I'll take some criticism of Bruce's parenting skills, but it has to come with understanding that guy probably has the most trauma in his fucked up brain out of all the characters and that he's trying/genuinely loves his kids, and the understanding that I love all those idiot Bats, but you absolutely will have an uphill battle getting me to read anything that doesn't have a good amount of focus on Dick Grayson because I'm a horrible gremlin about him and it cannot be overstated that Bruce & Dick is genuinely 50% of the reason I even read comics in the first place.  (Dick & Damian is like the next 20% of it.) I KNOW WHAT I'M ABOUT OKAY. I love fic recs, whether I've already read it or have it tucked up on my reader (then I'll know to prioritize it!), you cannot overload me because I am in hyperfixation mode right now.

[sakuracyanide]

pls know most my life i thought zoeisite was a woman & the lesbians were cousins b/c america is WEIRD but you bringing sailor moon on dash has unlocked precious core memories even if the english dub is.. a thing that happened [ legit their english names are cemented in my head to this day thanks to toonami. tell me their japanese names and i just cry confusion into my hands as a young fan who didn't know better b/c i was literally like 5-8 years old ]

softly go bleach your roots creep is like cemented in my brain the dub was so unhinged and i loved every fucked up second of it.

trust me trying to follow the changes between sailor moon adaptations is a nightmare. like classic & its og eng dub are basically different canons with totally different characters.

zoisite became zoycite, and now fandom forever spells zoisite (the actual rock) with a c and i'll die mad about it.

kunzite became malachite? for... reasons?? i don't think anyone has ever come out and said why.

and the manga is its own thing. like legit totally different vibe than the 90s anime - they were happening concurrently so the anime team was mostly just taking naoko's notes and then going feral??? like kunzite and zoisite are more or less an extended reference to patalliro. jadeite gets run over by a plane at one point. its fucking great. but like not that great if you want development for the main heroines. usagi does develop, but the rest of the girls stay very stagnant. the development in each season is given to whatever ragtag group of villains are being puppeted by the big bad. s1 had the shitennou, s2 had ali & an at the start bc the first season wrote itself into a corner by having usagi reset the timeline and they had to unfuck that before they could get started on the dark moon which you know what is a really upsetting plot i stan it. then it had the dark moon kingdom which ... if i remmeber right were people banished from the silver millennium for not wanting to be immortal and being concerned about all powerful monarchs? but they were corrupted. something something i would play saphir. s3 had the death busters and hotaru's hot dad. s4 had the amazon trio and the amazon quartet. and s5 had the sailor animates and i will die for lead crow & aluminium seiren's romance. so like if you care about the senshi as characters i don't really rec the 90s version on its own

and then there's sailor moon crystal which was supposed to be more faithful to the manga but was a ffffffffffucking mess. seriously i have never seen such ugly animation or bizarre animation choices for an ip that was lauded & is still upheld as having some of the most gorgeous backgrounds and animation in the genre. morimo clover z did the op and it slaps so like there's that but the rest of it is something else. it should be noted that the animation improves from season 3 onwards but they eventually just said fuck it and made movies out of the rest of it which is a bummer!

and then there's pretty guardian sailor moon (the live action drama which is THE BEST ADAPTATION I WILL GO TO WAR OVER THIS) which features all of the girls having an actual existential crisis over what it means to be reborn princesses from distant stars, it also gives them the spotlights they absolutely did not get in crystal or the og anime AND the shitennou get a lot of development.

and then theres the musicals.

i am happy to hold people at gunpoin - i mean, do a group watch of sailor moon! i really want to rewatch pgsm but i'm ngl its an early 00s live action jdrama so that........ that takes a strong mind to endure.

[white-collar-cannibal]

i basically typed my live reactions in to the ask box lmfao sorry

THE PART WHERE THEYRE LOOKING AT HIS FACE FOR THE FIRST(?) TIME AND SEEING THEIR DEATH AUUUUUAUAUAUUUUAUAU some of these lines /vpos

niki. niki. what are you doing niki. what are you doing niki

nooo frank :(( "how easily his bones could be yours" holy fucking shit i got chills /vpos

chutzpah!!! yiddish my beloved <3

not them making hetch fucking laugh omfg

"“Hey, don’t get a big head. They only put you on all the marketing because you’re pretty.” i'm gonna kill myself aaaaaaaaaah it's ramping up the lie is being taken-

the bit about breathing hetch's exhaled air oh my fucking god that was so good

UGRH i love the fact that ranboo hates what theyre doing, wishes they didnt, hates that hetch might be attracted to them, but theyre still doing it because of that god damn guilt, it's always the guilt, for what they think theyve done

OH MY GOD THE KISS I FUCKING SCREAMED

that scene was so- beautifully pulled off omfg. like as opposed to an actual romance, where the tension builds, and you're rooting 'kiss kiss kiss,' it was sudden, you could tell they didn't want to, but felt they had to, and the whole way that was written spoke to that and it was fucking amazing

also the fact that theyre embarassed is vvvv interesting... this entire concept makes me feral

ohhhhh my godddd the next bit. author (idk your name?? white collar? lmao sorry) i do not even know how to tell you how incredibly well done that was. ranboo fuckin- thinking about how they would kill hetch, as he kisses them, I CANNOT COHERENTLY EXPRESS HOW GOOD THAT IS YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA

anyway. god damn. ranboo is an amazing actor. i almost feel bad for hetch. almost. (i am afraid for what will happen to them this entire dynamic is so gloriously fucked up i adore it a bit too much)

the other actors are going to find out at some point and it's going to be horrible i just know it

i cannot imagine what can possible happen in the eight-ish remaining chapters but i am sure it will be devastating and incredible and i am going to be here for it

there were other things i was going to say but i forgot them. OH RIGHT just that this fic is my new hyperfixation yippeee kudos to you again for writing it!

—afternoon anon

eeeeeeeeeeee thank you!!!!!!! i can never abandon this fic now you people depend on me. i'm so glad that other people love this fic as much as i do writing it.

and the guilt!!!! you get it it's the guilt forever!!!! guilt is so incredibly tied into how i read glanboo and it's very fun to put them in a Situation where like. king is the guilt helping. is this really the right idea or are you just trying to hurt yourself.

and the kiss scene oh my god that hurt to write i was going "i'm CRINGE i'm CRINGE" the entire time but the violent interstitials were absolutely my favorite bit i loved the realization they could go there it's. chef's kiss i'm so glad other people liked that.

there may??? only be six additional chapters? no one look at me i'm working things out. but nevertheless we are going some Places i am so excited to take y'all to!!!

(as what will be a perpetual aside the seeing your death thing is pulled from p.219 of harrow the ninth, "Ianthe looked at you, and in the paleness of her skin and in the shadows of her lips was her death, and yours.")