#i'm talking about you alastor

[a-bisexual-panicking]

am I the only one that finds actually sad the fact that the only aroace character is the one shipped the most

[knifearo]

ultimately when it comes to shipping and fandom space treatment of aspec characters i just don't accept "aro/ace people can still date/have sex" as an answer from nonaspecs. like yeah. mhm. okay. now i think we both know that you're not saying that out of real interest in the diversity of aspec experiences. so you can turn in your seventeen-page essay on why and how you plan to examine this character's aspec identity within the context of a romantic or sexual relationship complete with evidence from canon and peer reviews from multiple aspec people within the next week or i'm putting you in the pit from the edgar allen poe story

[onesidedradiostatic]

Y’know actually since so many of the characters don’t necessarily know what the flags mean or even what their respective orientation labels mean, it has me thinking about how they’d describe their sexualities.

I can see Husk going into how the gender doesn’t matter to him as much as the person’s heart does. Val is just like “a hole is a hole.” That’s all I’ve come up with so far.

I think gay/homosexual/lesbian would at least be known well enough by the characters so I think angel dust and vaggie are good with describing themselves (and either way, probably pretty easy for them to just say they're not into women/men respectively). I like to think charlie is somewhat caught up with modern labels so she'd still call herself bi. hard to really get a read on cherri and pentious, but it'd probably be easy for them to just mention attraction to multiple genders. guys hot. gals hot. non-binary pals hot.

alastor, we KNOW the motherfucker doesn't know shit and rosie's decided to be a troll and not explain what aroace is to him, he probably just thinks he hasn't found anyone yet, doesn't see it as a priority, doesn't usually think about it and thinks everyone else is weird for thinking about it. now husk and pansexuality, probably less known, I can definitely see him just describing it as you said.

val though um. no he definitely knows to describe himself as pansexual I'm sure velvette sat him and vox down for a 3h presentation about modern labels and slang when she arrived. but very possible he did describe it in some fuckass way like you said beforehand or when velvette was trying to help them figure out their labels. I still find this concept very funny btw imagine having to explain all this shit about modern labels to 2 people literally older than boomers. oh yeah and

(source: hazbin/helluva animation director)

it's just silly crew art but like he's waving that flag. he knows

[a1sart]

NO BUT HUSK USED TO BE AN OVERLORD? THAT'S SO FUCKING SICK TELL ME MORE!!!!

what's his relationship to the other overlords? do they know that Alastor owns his soul now? What do they think of him? What was his rise to power like? Just HOW powerful is he actually? What is he holding back if he's holding back at all? Did he lose that power or does he still have it? How long was he in power for? Was his rise and fall quick? Is that why no one at the hotel seems to recognize him?

Angel says he isn't one for politics in the pilot so it makes sense why he wouldn't know but what about Vaggie? She seems like the type of person to keep track of that kind of thing. Did he rise to power and then lose it before she arrived in hell? Or does she recognize who the man behind the bar used to be?

And what about products he could have made? Are there old playing cards with his face on them scattered around hell? Poker chips with his branding on them? Abandoned casinos with his name on the sign? Slot machines with dapper little cats on the casing?

How does HE feel about his time as an overlord? Does he miss it? Does he regret it? He regrets gambling his soul away but if he could go back and change that, choose not to gamble with his soul, would he quit while he's ahead or continue to be an overlord? Did he himself own any souls? What happened to them after Alastor got his? Would Alastor own them too?

All questions that could be addressed in the show, but honestly I doubt they will be. We only have 4 episodes left in the season and they're not gonna spend all that precious time on Husk's backstory, no matter how interested I am by it. We might get one or two questions answered though and I would consider that a win :)

[yourlowkeyidiot3]

>>Trying to find an aroace character in a media that isn't a side character / a character that only showed up once in an episode and never again

>> after years I actually manage to find one that is one of the main characters

>> the fandom ships them with everyone and sexualises the hell out of them

>>oh

>> they use the "but aroace can still date and fuck!" excuse, which is valid as fuck but

>>the character is implied to not want/do that. Because while yes some aroace do have/want relationships, others don't.

>>they still use some kind of excuse to continue it

>>When I, an aroace person with no interest in a relationship, decide to speak up about the discomfort that causes me I get sushed and told that I get too mad over a fictional character

>>yea I do acknowledge they're a fictional character, yea I do acknowledge that I can't just magical make them stop shipping and sexualising them. Cuz they're not real after all. What bothers me is that it's a common and popular thing in the fandom. I wouldn't had minded it if there wasn't so much of it, especially cause they're so many other characters they can sexualise and ship. And that while they're a fictional character, their sexuality isn't. Aroace people exist. Aroace people that don't want relationships or sex exist. By taking this one character with the little rep we have, and sexualising the hell out of them even tho they don't want this kind of stuff. It really gives me a good look that you don't actually think we're real. That everyone has to want sex, that everyone wants to be in a relationship.

>>it gets even worse cause they get pissed when the lesbian character is shipped with a man. Valid as fuck. I do too. But when it's the aroace character... it's suddenly okay?

>>they don't care so why do I even bother

[prince-liest]

Fic rec: this is a crack fic with an improbable premise (Alastor hires IMP because he wants to get Vox a birthday gift) but the way the author wrote Blitzø's POV on Alastor is *chef's kiss*/aldldk he doesn't know how lucky he is that Alastor can't read minds

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55015480

Fic link!

The only thing that makes this fic funnier than this particular author's profound talent at writing absolutely hysterical crack fic is the fact that I do not have the foggiest fucking idea what any of these Ikea items are, including the one that Alastor wanted IMP to get him.

10/10, I'm fucking cackling @soot-and-salt your works are LOVELY

[just-another-helluva-hazbin-blog]

OH So thats why I see so many people not wanting Mimzy's part in the dad fight between Alastor and Lucifer. (I forgot the song name bear with me)

[leniisreallycool]

It's insane to me how so many people look at a cannibalistic serial killer deer demon and simultaneously think "ah yes, babygirl. Must torture." I don't know how I feel about being one of them

[lovethatmakingcoffee]

i think vivzie should reverse the sinners can't get pregnant rule so Alastor can get knocked up

[selfshippinglover]

Me, knowing full well Alastor would never like me back:

yeah

yeah? well

what if we d-danced in the hotel i-in the middle of the night huh?

when we think no one else is around? w-what then?

[namimikan]

turns out i'm there for lucifer morningstar and him alone. gdi.

[concubuck]

Alastor, I'm really into dissections. Well, vivisections. Seeing someone writhe on a cold table before me, my scalpel tracing along their flesh, before cutting in deeper. I love seeing the wet, warm insides, blood tricking as I open the body cavity-- the writing, the agony on their face, how they can't even scream at some points. And then when I crack the rips? Oooh, how their heart starts pounding, I'm shaking just thinking about it... Anyway, think we can work something out, you and I? I'll make sure to bring my best bone saw!

Oho! Now that sounds like a wild night! Hah! It's been months since I've gotten a knife in me—and that was one of those fellows who likes to stab. Don't get me wrong, I know how to enjoy a few good hard thrusts; but every once in a while you want a little... finesse. Someone who really pays attention to every vein and tendon—someone who knows how to ignite nerves you never knew you had. It sounds exquisite.

Unfortunately, I do currently have a passenger on board whom I'm rather keen to keep away from sharp blades. I can fold him away to another dimension, but I'm not entirely sure what anatomy those hidden parts connect back to in this dimension.

So I'll have to check with my doctors on what's safe; but we might need to keep the vivisection from the diaphragm up, if that's alright with you. If you'd rather have full, unrestricted access, well—I'll be free in late January. 😉

[alastors-radioshow]

SSHEESH.. how was i to know?!! WOWWEE talk about an operation preying mantis response there! Proportional much? SHEESH.... I'm NA ( native American) I also told you I am NEW HERE. That's what you look like to me ya lil 10lbs of Dynamite in a 2lb box! SHEESH!! Cut back on the Venison dude, its a sweet meat and clearly you don't Need any more SUGAR!

"Prends tes opinions et mets-les dans ton cul!"

"Ṕ̵̢̲͝u̶͔̮̜͂̂ͅt̸̉͋͌͐̕͝��̖a̴̅̀̌ͅį̴̭̱̟͊̿́̓̍ñ̶̲͇͘ ̵͈̖̮̩̘̼́d̸̡̟͙̙̝̜͗̍̄e̵̯̿͑̉̓́͋ ̶͍̤̩̗̓͛ṁ̷̨̜̟̼̠͗̕͝ȩ̷͓̱̤̦͌̀̽̿̄r̶̨̘̓́̑͗d̴̨̥͖̏̚e̵̠͚̹̮͇̽̎͛̈́!̸̝̏͝"

[mason-cipher]

YOU DONT HAVE A WIFE, HES YOUR HUSBAND, BESTIE.

Uhhh I love my wife :)

[keets-writing-corner]

Thinking a LOT about Lucifer in the latest Hazbin episode. Idk what I was expecting but not this??

As I was watching my immediate thought was just "huh... Lucifer is kinda of weird..." but as the episode went on I realized the issue

the dude is off the chain depressed, like he says it as a joke but holy cow it is SO BAD

He's manically just creating rubber ducks cuz his daughter really like it that one time but it's empty, it's never good enough but he keeps doing it, maybe cuz he doesn't know how to pass the time otherwise.

like I get the feeling he HAS better things he SHOULD be doing than making rubber duck after rubber duck. At first I was like, "Bruh why isn't the king of hell doing anything?" aaaaand then it became clear...

The dude is disassociating so bad he can barely hold a conversation let alone remember information. He clearly WANTS to, he wants to be involved with his daughter so bad, he wants to care about the things she's doing so bad, but his depression keeps interfering. It's like he can only hear every other word and he grasps onto the ones he does hear semi-out of context. Like you can see every time he catches something that he hadn't before and he just "well shit I didn't catch that part"

and that's why he reacts so weird when people talk to him. He is struggling so bad to engage with the conversation he's only getting 50% of it

does that look like the face of a man who knows what the hell the conversation is even about??? he is STRUGGLING

like Charlie spent so long telling him about the hotel, and he STILL didn't understand what she wanted. Yeah it comes off as ditzy but literally I've been in that position where your brain just "nope, not doing this right now" and nerfs your conversation comprehension. So as someone who's BEEN in that position, to me it feels exactly like what he's dealing with. He's sorta engaged with the conversation, but only as much as his brain will allow

For example, when I'm dealing with this, this is what someone talking to me feels like this where the crossed out parts are what I missed and bold is what I catch, "Hey! You know I was thinking for dinner we could either make some chicken with rice? But if you don't feel like cooking, pasta is super easy and you love that right? What do you want to do?" you can kinda get that someone is trying to talk to you about dinner, and towards the end you get the impression that they asked something that needs your input so you can decently put 2 and 2 together and try and pass off, but crucial bits were left out, I would have no idea that either chicken or pasta is in the conversation only having heard "rice". When someone is just talking at me, I can decently pass off as being engaged but the second I'm required to participate in the conversation I'm screwed. Seem familiar? At which point I have 2 options, try to give a bullshit answer, or admit that I missed what they were saying and ask them to repeat

Lucifer, unfortunately, is trying so damn hard to hide that he's dealing with like 24/7 dissociation, so he can't admit that he's missing entire chunks of the conversation, hence his really weird replies. He does eventually get the full picture and then he and Charlie start having the real conversation

Also, the Alastor/Lucifer rivalry was hilarious but also really indicative of more of what Lucifer is dealing with

Alastor is, unfortunately, really good at picking up people's insecurities, and thanks to Charlie's description earlier and watching Lucifer clearly trying to overcompensate, he immediately picks up on the fact that Lucifer KNOWS he struggles to be a good dad (we know cuz it's cuz of the depression, hard to be engaged when your brain keeps turning off) and decides to rub salt in the wound by pretending he's been acting as a surrogate father to Charlie. Now why Alastor decided to pick a fight with the king of hell is beyond me, I do not understand Alastor (and I LIKE IT) (maybe it's cuz Alastor thinks he's hot shit and was expecting Lucifer to at least have heard of him but Lucifer just treats him like a nobody? who knows)(why would Lucifer listen to radio anyways when he can't even pay attention to a conversation it'd just be white noise)

But yeah I just was expecting someone who oozed either charisma or presence and instead I got a depressed dad who's dissociating so bad he can barely function and be present in his life. The only thing it seems he CAN do is make rubber ducks cuz his daughter really liked it that one time

Idk Lucifer is tragic to me. Whatever the full details of what heavan did to him absolutely broke him and he can't deal with it. He's aware of it, and he doesn't know how to fix it, so he tries to over compensate and sorta makes an ass out of himself but no one says or does anything cuz this guy is supposed to be THE king of hell

Suddenly it's making a lot more sense why he just rolls over and lets heaven do what it wants and even told Charlie to go in his place the start of the show. He's not in any headspace to hold a basic conversation let alone negotiate! He didn't even know who Alastor was, he's been so out of touch

idk I like him, he seems sweet, I hope Charlie brings some light back into his life. He really needs to get out of that rubber duck room

[lina-lovebug]

I'd Fight The Devil

Pairing: Alastor x fem! reader

Background: reader is Lilith and Lucifers oldest, and resembles Lilith more. Lucifer has a hard time bonding with her because of this, and Alastor decides to step in.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"DAD'S COMING?!"

(Y/N) Morningstar, firstborn daughter of Lilith and Lucifer, was currently having a breakdown over the fact that her father was on his way to the hotel.

She'd have no issue leaving, of course, but Charlie tricked her dear old sister into staying by saying she needed help with the hotel. . .and told her their dad was coming when he was two minutes away.

It's not like she didn't miss him, but things became different once their mother disappeared. Lucifer threw himself into his ideas, and (Y/N) tried maintaining their relationship but he couldn't even stand the look of her.

"I'm sorry! But I thought maybe you guys could talk while he's here?" Charlie suggested with a gulp, twiddling her fingers.

"I'm done trying with dad. If he wants to talk, he can come to me," (Y/N) crossed her arms, firm on her stance.

"I never thought I'd meet someone with worse daddy issues, but here you are, cher," Alastor, with his famous grin, looked down at the Princess of Hell. She huffed, not in the mood for his side comments.

"Alastor, please-"

"He's here!"

"-please fucking hide me!" She ran behind him, despite the mass amount of blonde hair making it obvious.

He chuckled.

Honestly, since meeting the eldest Morningstar, Alastor deemed himself her Protector. Not that the girl wasn't capable or needed him persay, but he cared for her. Being on the aroace spectrum, he wasn't plagued by a selfish desire to fuck her, but it was a sweet concern that slowly turned into a need to be near her.

A need to make her his.

"Hopefully he doesn't-"

"Pumpkin?"

"Fuck," (Y/N) silently cursed under her breath before Alastor stepped aside.

"Hey dad," Lucifer felt a pang in his sinister heart at her tone. She sounded uncomfortable and wouldn't even look at him, but he also remembered that he couldn't look at her at times.

It reminded him of happier times.

Times he didn't want to be reminded of anymore.

"So how've you been? Heard you've got a fancy job now. Probably making loads of money, huh?" He chuckled nervously.

"Dad, it's my company. I made it."

And he couldn't even remember that she did that?

Any dad would remember that his child created her own business.

"Ouch."

"And it's got a fucking duck on the logo. God, dad," She rose her voice, "you can't even remember that?"

"I've been busy, pumpkin-"

"Too busy to call? Too busy to even fucking call?!"

Charlie flinched at the harshness in her voice. She's always been a firecracker but she's never seen her so angry.

"I'm not fighting with you, (Y/N)," Lucifer stepped towards her, "why do you insist on fighting? Especially when I'm here for Charlie."

"Oh, you're here for Charlie?" Her horns started to come up through her skin, rolling back like a rams.

Just like her mom.

"I'm not making this about me. I just wish you'd make the effort instead of it having to be me," She missed who he was.

And during this, Alastor could see the pain on her face. She was furious, and rightfully so.

But he let her fight her own battles.

"I'm sorry that I look like mom. Is that what you want me to say?!"

"Yes!"

He didn't mean it. Of fucking course he didn't mean it, but it slipped out.

"Dad! That's enough!" Charlie ran to her, seeing tears well up in her sisters eyes. "How could you say that?"

"Pumpkin, I-"

"Don't," She sniffled, holding Charlie close, "don't come near me."

But he didn't listen.

He hated being the fact that his little girl was crying because of him.

"I think you've come far enough," Alastor spoke, getting infront of Charlie and (Y/N). He is excellent at saving face, so his pure unadulterated rage was hidden beneath his smile.

She hiccuped behind him, sobbing into Charlie's shoulder.

"Don't make me move you," Lucifer glared.

"And don't make me fucking kill you for hurting what's mine."

His voice turned more static-like than before, his eyes a burning red and his horns outstretched. He was a fucking shield for his Princess, and not even the King of Hell could get through. Lucifer recognized this and humbly backed away, retreating with his tail between his legs.

_ _ ☆ _ _

(Y/N) spent the next hour crying in her room. Over the years, she had started to hate herself for looking like her mom, and Lucifers' confirmation only reaffirmed it.

"Need anything else?" Charlie asked her. Although her sister wasn't searching for redemption, she had her own personal room in the hotel.

"Can you get Alasto-?"

A knock sounded at the door.

"Was he there the whole time?" She sniffled, and a muffled "maybe" came through the door.

Her bed was surrounded by napkins that she quickly placed on her bedside as Charlie allowed Alastor inside.

Alone.

The two of them.

Might as well just throw them condoms and say get to it, is what (Y/N) was thinking. She's known about her crush on The Radio Demon for a few months now, having a fantasy dream here and there, but wasn't much of an active person herself.

"Thank you. I know he tried to fix it, but I couldn't stand to look at him," Her puffy eyes made Alastors eye twitch, still a small spout of anger for her father.

"Of course, my dear," He sat himself next to her on the bed.

"Because your father, although the King of Hell, is a fucking coward", is what he wanted to say but kept those words for himself.

"Did you mean it? That I'm yours?" She asked, her hand inching closer to his.

"I never say anything I don't mean, cher," He grabbed her hand, kissed it, and made the she-demon gasp.

"I thought you hated touch."

He chuckled, "Oh, I do, but not if it's you. Your skin is warm, and it brings me comfort. You bring me comfort."

"You'd have me, even if I want to be glued to your side? Even having petty fights with my dad?"

"Darling, I'd wear your skin if you asked."

"Oh, how romantic," She blushed before both his hands came up to her face, bringing her into a needy kiss. With her, he needed to feel her.

Someday, even all of her.

"And I'd eat demons with you," She whispered against his lips.

"Oh my heart may burst, my dear."

Taglist: @lorkai @droopingdatura @tr1coo @randomuser-89 @abbiedail @evelin1o1 @sseleniaa