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tanenigiri · 2 years

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Review #3 - My Summer of You (Volume 1: The Summer of You)

Japanese title: 君は夏のなか (Kimi wa Natsu no Naka)

Story and art: Nagisa Furuya

English publisher: Kodansha Comics

Number of volumes: 2 (complete)

Turning a simple summer romance into a cinematic experience.

(This review contains story spoilers.)

One of the big reasons why I gravitated toward slice-of-life as a genre was how these kinds of stories deal with their conflicts. Instead of something grand or world-ending, these conflicts are often emotional and internal, relying mostly on character dynamics to keep the narrative going. As a fan of character-driven stories, these quieter scenes do a lot more for me than the louder action sequences or edge-of-your-seat performances.

So it’s a bit surprising that, whenever I think of My Summer of You’s first volume, the scene that most often pops into my head is the one where Wataru punches Saeki near the end of the story.

That’s not to diminish the emotional beats of the story, as I do find them impactful. (Maybe not as impactful as that punch was to Saeki.) However, my thoughts immediately go to this scene since this punch, brutal as it may be when presented as a stand-alone, took quite a while to work towards, both in the puncher’s and receiver’s end. And it’s the buildup to it - and what happens after - that makes this story quite the charming read.

My Summer of You follows the story of Saeki, a high school student who’s popular with the ladies, and Wataru, a batchmate from another class who isn’t. Thanks to a chance meeting, they soon learn that they both love movies, and it’s through these movie meetups that they form an unexpected but strong bond. In what was a very surprising move for me at the time since this was one of the first series I'd read, Saeki confesses his feelings to Wataru at the very first chapter, and the rest of the story deals with Wataru reconciling with these feelings and ultimately realizing that he reciprocates them.

While that seems straightforward, there are two major plot points that complicate things. The first is the film pilgrimage, which surrounds quite a hefty chunk of the narrative’s middle part. Playing with the story’s focus on movies, Saeki and Wataru’s relationship develops quite cinematically, with the places they visit serving as backdrops to the movie they’ve watched as well as to the key moments that build up to Wataru’s response - which is, of course, held in a very important setting of the movie they’re doing a pilgrimage of. It’s a great thread that ties the story together, and the fact that their own relationship develops “within a movie” is fun to think about.

The second, and the one I still have mixed feelings about even as I write this review, is Saeki suddenly leaving and transferring schools right before the film pilgrimage ends. Wataru finds out from one of Saeki’s classmates and later from a teacher that the move had been planned for several months, and he understandably goes into a spiral about it. Saeki later explains his actions as a way of personal closure and subsequent moving on from Wataru, as he is still convinced that the latter won’t be able to return his feelings. This was a running thread for the whole story so it doesn’t come out of nowhere, but there’s a part of me that thinks how Saeki dealt with it was way too drastic and abrupt - an opinion that Wataru definitely shares.

And that’s what leads to the punch above - one that I believe is very much deserved. Wataru quickly disproves Saeki’s notions about him not being able to return his feelings, and the main story ends with them reconciling and Saeki promising that he’ll move back once he finishes high school.

If the volume ended there, I would’ve left it as is and thought of it as just a simple love story that had a slightly rushed ending. But breaking off from most of the manga I’ve read, My Summer of You features three bonus stories that could essentially pass as their own chapters. And it’s these bonus chapters that fill in quite a number of blanks for me and make me appreciate what this story was going for a whole lot more.

Perhaps most importantly, the first bonus chapter features Saeki giving a more thorough explanation of his actions and acknowledging that what he did was wrong, especially as he didn’t consider Wataru’s feelings on the matter at all. That was in the back of my mind the entire time, so I’m glad that Saeki does end up realizing that he was selfish and apologizing for it. It makes Wataru’s own acceptance of the situation a lot easier to swallow, and it puts their relationship in a great starting point as they’re already realizing the importance of communicating their issues with each other.

The other two bonus chapters are more on the lighter side, but they both do a good job of fleshing out things from Saeki’s perspective. In the same way that the story does a great job in humanizing Wataru and slowly disproving his own view of himself as some average nobody, these bonus chapters humanize Saeki in a way that removes him from the image of a perfect guy who has everything figured out and shows him second-guessing himself and being nervous around Wataru. It’s a nice way of showing that they really are equals, despite what everyone else thinks.

And it’s a great note to end My Summer of You on. It's a lot simpler than most of the manga I'm covering here, but I think it uses that simplicity to its advantage - it has one story that it delivers very well. I may have some misgivings, but by the end of the day, there's a certain charm to My Summer of You that's hard to find in other stories, and for me, that's what makes it worth the read.

Random thoughts that I couldn’t fit elsewhere:

I wish Wataru’s classmates played a bigger role, as they were always funny whenever they showed up. Sekiguchi in particular was a really great character, especially when he suddenly shows this maturity in the end where he tells the others not to bring up Saeki whenever Wataru is around. It would’ve been nice to see a scene of them consoling Wataru after Saeki transferred schools.

I'm not a movie buff, so there are probably a lot of movie references that flew over my head, especially when they were in the pilgrimage sites. Like I mentioned above, though, I think it's a great image that ties the story together, and the parallels between their relationship and the movies they were watching were nice to see.

I also very much have to point out that all except one of the scenes - the second bonus chapter - takes place across multiple summers. The story does have a certain brightness to it, so it’s a fitting setting.

Thanks for reading! This is a bit less optimistic than the previous two reviews I’ve posted, but I still had fun writing it as it helped me concretize what I thought about the story as a whole. Despite my misgivings, I do think My Summer of You is worth the read if you’re into the very familiar dynamic of “popular-with-the-ladies boy falls in love with less-popular boy” as it is a charming take on that type of relationship. I also have a review lined up for its sequel, though it’ll be a while before I post that.

#My Summer of You #Kimi Wa Natsu no Naka #Nagisa Furuya #Wataru Toda #Chiharu Saeki #BL manga #manga review #manga

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andswarwrites · 1 year

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Day 21

I've shared a lot this month. In fact, the case could be made that I overshared. I'm not shy, and I disagree with stigma attached to mental disorders, because mental health corresponds to physical health: your brain is part of your body, and in order to remain healthy it needs to be cared for. If someone develops a physical ailment, they often receive support and sympathy from others. Why would mental ailments need to be concealed at all costs from everyone around you for fear of judgment and prejudice? And yet that is how things really are. The only reason I feel comfortable sharing is because my circles of friends and family enjoy truth.

Candor is often frowned upon because it can be blunt and unfeeling. So with honesty should come tact. Tact involves choosing the right word and phrase to express yourself so that your viewpoint comes across without bludgeoning another person with it. And it is also being noncommittal or falling silent when you see that discussion will be fruitless. Discussing a concept or viewpoint doesn't need to end with your having convinced someone: simply sharing how you feel and think, and listening intently and respectfully to another person who sees things differently from you is my definition of a good conversation.

I used to love debate. I loved arguing my point. And I do have very strong opinions on a multitude of topics. It's just that now, in conversation, if I differ with someone, I don't want to win an argument anymore. I don't want to prove my point. I'm looking for an exchange. You share your point of view with me, I share my point of view, and together we get an idea of how the other person sees the world. Part of how I got to this point is my writing. When I write a story, every time I write a character, I like to approach the story from their perspective.

To make characters come to life, they each need to have their own distinct personality and outlook. They can't all be copies of the author. Though I do confess that all my main characters have a few characteristics or experiences I can relate to: that way they ring true. You know what I love in a story? When the main character is not infallible, when they mess up too, and they need to set it right. When I was little, I was horrified when my beloved main characters had feet of clay. Nowadays I'm delighted.

It just goes to show how much we change as life goes on. For one thing we never stop learning. Some lessons may be difficult or demanding, others are downright simple and straightforward. The question is can we adapt with the lessons life throws at us? Some of them are very painful indeed. And it doesn't seem fair that some of us experience far more pain than others. I think it's important to keep that in mind when someone is rude or aggressive with us. What are they going through that we don't know about?

I'm always honest, but I do omit some information at times. I don't feel the need to constantly air my grievances or confess every thought and action. Considering how much I've shared, it might seem like I hold nothing back, but that's not true. I do. The one (human) person I confide in nearly 99.9% of the time is S-. Sometimes it takes me a few days to tell him what's on my mind, but even if I'm worried about his response, I do end up telling him. And he never overreacts. I've never regretted confiding in S-.

I had a completely sleepless night last night. I keep having to re-read what I've previously written to continue my train of thought. I've just got to make it through the morning and then I will enter my bedroom, flop into bed, and hopefully get some sleep. Not too much, because I need to sleep tonight too. I dealt with a bad bout of insomnia in my twenties: I'd spend a completely sleepless night trying to be as quiet as I could so I wouldn't wake S-, and then get as many tasks done in the morning and early afternoon, sleep from mid-afternoon to early evening, spend some time with my husband, and rinse, repeat.

In my thirties I would occasionally wake up in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning, and since it was dark and quiet, it seemed like the ideal time to write. But getting the juices flowing so to speak when you should be sleeping is not a good idea, because you write for hours and before you know it's morning and you never got back to bed. It's better to read. Reading works your brain in a different way from writing, and you naturally get sleepy.

I've also cleaned in the middle of the night. Tiptoed around so as not to wake anyone, but tidied up, washed the dishes, cleaned the counter and stovetop. And I've prayed. When I simply had too much on my mind, I poured it all out, sometimes with long pauses while my thoughts overwhelmed me, then formulating those thoughts into words, sometimes so difficult to express that tears have sprung to my eyes. I've also read Psalms.

So what else can my overtired brain come up with today? It's hard to write when you are tired or sick. I've written scenes of a novel with a cold or the flu. That's when a character steals the show with a cold or the flu. I can’t write anything else but misery in those situations. After a sleepless night my tongue's filter is nonexistent. I just write whatever pops into my head, consequences be damned. I seriously need to go sleep, but I still have another hour of teaching and chores to get through. Oh, the life of a mother

#insomnia #debate #personal

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isaidtheysaid · 2 years

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Malice

— Keigo Hogashino

One thing I noticed from Higashino works, is his approach for crime mystery novels is quite different. Not exactly something new, but different for sure and variatif. From the four books I read so far, each one of them written in different writing and narrative style which is something I appreciated the most about his works.

Malice is the first books from Keigo Higashino's Detective Kaga serial.

I love Detektif Kaga. And the way he narrate, or in this case, wrote things that unfold the story. It's simple, forward, formal, and not misleading. Like Mr. Nonoguchi stated in his account, and I quote, “he was precise, thorough, and startlingly fast.” haracter that talk in riddles in mystery novel for sure a bit annoying sometimes, which isn't the case with Detective Kaga in Malice.

Detective Kaga is a former teacher. He doesn't have unique trait, eccentric, or even a profound detective, at least, the story don't make it like he is anything special beside for his determine to found the actual truth. That said, instead, being what special about him for me. And his reason for left his old job is something flaw, that make him admirable in some sense.

And the fact he is an actual detective. It's nice seeing authorities capable at doing their job. Which in the most murder mystery, seems to often painted as less capable.

Malice told the story about an acclaimed author found dead by his wife and friend at his house just days before his departure to Canada.

The story written in form of ones account. The story written by one of the character, the friends of the victim who's apparently also a fellow author for children books and former acquaintance of Detective Kaga when they both work as teacher in the same school. Also, the notes written from Detective Kaga himself.

However, for the moment we learn it's someone account, it's for sure isn't really realiable. It's almost guaranteed, the writer doesn't actually telling the truth, and the story itself also aware of the fact, that indicates from Detective Kaga's notes.

At first, the story seems like follow the usual formula of murder mystery. We present with the case, the suspect, the investigation, some twist and turns, and finally, the ultimate settlement by Detective Kaga. Or so it seems, except all that happened in one-third of the book. Surely, there's something more, isn't it? So, what's left for another two third of the book?

We got ourselves a solved case, the murderer confession, and even supporting evidence. But we just get our what, when, whom, and how. But we don't get the "why"

So, it's what Detective Kaga searching for the rest of the book. The reason and motive why the murder occured in the first place.

The mystery itself, isn't what intrigued me the most Maybe because I could grasp the big picture of the twist. But, It's rather the story as a whole and the characters. Once I get the big picture and where the plot is going, the story managed to made me abandoned my analytical thinking and just enjoyed the story unfold.

I think at this point, I don't see Higashino's work as a mysteries novel, rather, a study of human nature. It's giving me nostalgic vibes with Agatha Christie's works. Human's psychology is the main theme. Even though, this is also not something new, I'm still intrigued by Detective Kaga journey to find the truth.

Malice also touched on different things. Such as bullying, teaching, and of course, writing and publishing. It's a well done touch for me, add some characteristic for its characters.

I had to say, even if Malice doesn't really impressed me, but it's still meet my expectations. And even though I love Detective Kaga more than Detective Galileo, so far, The Devotion of Suspect X still my favorite of Higashino's works.

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buckyseddie · 2 years

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if only

pairings — tasm!peter parker x bff!fem!reader, featuring bff!gwen stacy x bff!fem!reader

summary — in which, she’s been second to gwen her entire life, so, naturally, it comes to a shock to her when peter picks her.

word count — 4.8k.

warnings — angst, fluff, best friends to lovers trope, protective/soft!peter, reader and peter equally pining after each other, reader being extremely insecure about herself because of always being a last choice, mentions of anxiety and o.c.d., reader being self-loathing towards herself, also slight mentions of reader having an abusive parent and hints of an actual abusive situation near the end (i feel like that needs to be a warning because i know how it feels to be in an abusive situation, so yeah), use of pet-names [baby], confessions, kisses, gwen being a supportive best friend.

notes — first off, i just want to say, this isn’t a fic that will spoil nwh. yes, i’ve watched it, but i don’t want to ruin that for anyone else, so i’m not going to spoil the movie!! anyways, after watching the movie, though, [THIS MAY BE A SPOILER THO->] my obsession over andrew as spider-man has come back, so here i am, writing about him because he’s one of my biggest comfort characters from that fictional world, etc. anyways, i hope you enjoy <3. also, i want to clarify that i have nothing against gwen. in fact, i love her with my entire heart. the narration is just based on how the reader was treated throughout her and gwen’s friendship. another quick thing, if i mess up any details from the movies, please, don’t come for me :/. i haven’t watched the movies in years and i can’t figure out where to watch it for free, so please forgive me for any errors, etc! gif and divider creds to owner!

p.s., feedback is very much encouraged and appreciated <3.

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IT’S A GIVEN THAT SHE constantly feels like gwen is much more important than her.

it’s understandable that she has never felt like she matters just as much as gwen does. that’s just how it’s always been for [y/n].

why, you ask? it’s quite simple; gwen is kind and caring and beautiful — tons of people like her and crush on her.

and no, that’s not gwen’s fault.

in fact, she always tried so much to make [y/n] feel included and like she’s good enough because she hates the way her best friend feels about herself — she hates that people make her feel like that when she sees her as so much more.

but, no matter how much gwen tried — and failed — she just couldn’t get her best friend to see how important she is.

and that certainly isn’t [y/n]’s fault, either.

you see, not only, is it because she feels like a last choice when it comes to her friendship with gwen, but she also doesn’t have such a great home life — her father is extremely abusive, and her mother is never home to give her the love she deserves.

it had been like that for so long that [y/n] usually crashes at gwen’s house on most nights that she possibly can — she’ll do just about anything to avoid her father and his angry actions.

and it doesn’t help that it’s quite obvious that the one person she cares about the most, only has eyes for her best friend.

i mean, talk about heartbreak, right?

[y/n] and peter — just like herself and gwen — have been close friends since middle school.

of course, they’re not as close as gwen and [y/n] are, but still.

and it really didn’t take that long for her to grow intense feelings for her good friend, peter parker.

so, when the moment came where she catches the two talking, smiling and laughing with each other, she stops from where she had recently been walking out of from one of her classes.

her heart nearly stops, her blood running cold as the tears begins to blur her vision.

the small little wheezes of laughter of peter’s finally dies in his throat when he notices [y/n] stood behind him and gwen, watching them with an unreadable look in her eyes.

then, a shuddering breath escapes out of her slightly chapped lips as their eyes finally meet.

with another hallow breath leaving her, [y/n] shakes her head and keeps repeating to herself that she has no right to be heartbroken — or hurt — over both of her best friend’s hitting it off with each other as she forces herself to walk down the hall, over to her locker.

as she hurries past them, not giving either of them the time of day during her emotional mood, she tries to ignore their gazes burning into her side.

peter watches her longingly, frowning as she finally makes it to her locker, twisting the lock and unlocking it with her passcode.

“you know… you could just tell her how you feel, right?” gwen asks from her place behind him, raising a questioning eyebrow at him as he continues to watch his best friend numbly grab her backpack from inside of her locker.

with a sigh, peter shakes his head.

“i—i can’t.” he mumbles, feeling the multiplied amount of anxiety beginning to fill him at the thought of ruining his friendship with his very best friend.

“why not?” she asks in a soft voice, tilting her head to the side in confusion.

but, just as he opens his mouth to explain what he’s thinking, she rolls her eyes and groans, before swiftly interrupting him. “—and don’t you dare say it’s because she doesn’t feel the same. because she does, trust me. she does.”

peter sputters, brows knitting together in confusion as he turns back to face gwen. “w—what? no, sh—she doesn’t. of course she doesn’t. why would she?” he rambles, causing gwen to become irritated with him and lightly slap him in the arm.

“idiot, parker! you literally are so clueless that it’s embarrassing to witness firsthand. she obviously was jealous when she saw us talking because she likes you. and obviously, she thinks something’s going on between us,” she chastises him, before explaining more. “it’s so obvious how she feels about you. and although she’s never told me how she feels about you, it’s quite clear she does feel that way. she just never told me because i think she thinks that i like you and that you like me — she probably thinks that she doesn’t have a chance with you. she’s always felt like she wasn’t enough through the entire time i’ve been friends with her because of how people treated me compared to her.”

as he hears more of what she says, peter’s heart cracks in half at the thought of [y/n] thinking she’s not enough.

i mean… sure, he always knew that she was quiet and kept to herself. but, he just thought that that was who she was, not that it had to do with her insecurities.

“peter, you need to tell her how you feel before you lose her. because, trust me, you will, if you don’t talk to her. it’s a miracle her and i are still best friends — when things get too intense or scary for her, or if she thinks someone’s going to hurt or leave her, she self-sabotages the relationship and pushes the person away before they can do it to her.”

she raises a brow at him, waiting for him to agree with her.

but, it’s almost as if he’s stuck in his own world — in his own head. he’s still frozen in shock, finding it completely hard to believe that his best friend reciprocates the same feelings he has for her.

with a groan, gwen mumbles, “just tell her,” before she’s walking off, leaving him still in an equal amount of shock and confusion.

—————

WITH A HEAVY SIGH, [Y/N] lets herself fall onto her bed, in which, is made neatly, due to her crippling anxiety.

although, she’s absolutely sure that it has more to do with her o.c.d. than anything else.

after a few moments of feeling the most uncomfortable pain ever, from lying directly on top of her heavy backpack, she sighs and moves to sit up to take the straps off of her shoulders.

but, something in particular causes her to stop her actions completely; a door slamming shut causes her head to snap up with fear beginning to swirl deeply in her [y/e/c] eyes.

a deep intake of shaky breaths later, [y/n] tries to calm herself as her father’s footsteps carry on and edge closer to the top of the steps that leads directly to her bedroom door.

although, before she can fully process this fact and prepare for a conversation that may or may not end in violence, her eyes catch a silhouette climbing up to her window.

as he climbs up nervously to his best friend’s bedroom window — not knowing of her biggest secret — peter freezes when he sees the panicked look on [y/n]’s face.

[y/n] freezes, before snapping her head back towards her bedroom door, trying to figure out how much closer her father is.

although, she impulsively decides that telling peter to leave before he finds out the truth, is totally worth the risk of getting caught by her father and getting an even worse punishment than she’d normally get whenever she was home — the times where she wasn’t crashing at gwen’s, which was usually extremely rare.

peter’s brows knit together in confusion as [y/n] slowly and quietly flips the latch and lifts up the window as much as she possibly can.

“peter! what are you doing here?”

before he can actually answer her, a loud booming voice yells, “[y/n]! open this door, right now!” her father violently jiggles the door knob, confirming that it is indeed locked.

she snaps her head to the direction of her door, a gasp leaving her lips and a fearful expression quickly taking over her face.

then, she turns back to peter, her tearful gaze and petrified expression completely visible to him now as she stutters in a whisper, “y—you have to go, peter. please.”

still in shock from how violent the man on the other side of the door is acting, peter snaps out of his confused daze and shakes his head.

“[y/n], something’s obviously going on. just talk to me.”

a loud and violent pound on the door later and tears start to spill from her eyes to her cheeks in fear of her father hurting her best friend.

“p—peter… please. i’m begging you, just go. you can’t be here for what happens next. i… i—i need you safe. so, please… just go.” she cries out, trembling as she reaches over the windowsill and grabs onto one of his hands and squeezes it.

peter shakes his head once more, about to say more.

but, he’s interrupted when [y/n]’s father slams the door against the lock, causing it to open just a fraction, bringing his daughter to the realization that he’d be inside her room any second.

[y/n] anxiously turns back to peter.

“please. just leave, hide, whatever. just… please, don’t let him see or hear you.” she whispers shakily, pulling her hand away from his and backing up as she hopes to god peter will be gone long before her father finally breaks through her bedroom door.

peter opens his mouth to say more, not ready to leave her alone in this situation — whatever this situation means — when she nods to him, tears resurfacing.

“i—it’s okay. i’ll come find you — w—we’ll talk, okay? just go. i’ll… i’ll be okay. i promise.” her voice cracks.

with another hesitant glance at her, peter finally sighs in defeat and begins to climb back down the side of the apartment building.

the moment he’s far enough away, [y/n] heaves in a sigh of relief and races over to the window, taking no pauses and quietly shuts the window, just as her father finally breaks through, a look of pure rage in his eyes.

“d—dad, please—” she begins in a tone mixed with both pleading and trembles in it.

“what did i say about locking your door, [y/n]?” he questions in a voice of so much calmness throughout the anger he obviously feels, causing a chill to run through her spine as she knows all to well of what’s to come next.

—————

“OH MY GOD. [Y/N]!” GWEN gasps the second she opens up her front door to see her best friend with bruises surrounding her entire face, including a black eye.

[y/n] frowns, hating that she had to come to her best friend and be babied and treated like a fragile piece of glass, but allows gwen to guide her into the living room and over to the couch anyways, knowing that her best friend is just concerned and worried for her.

“what happened?” gwen questions her, after grabbing her a frozen bag of peas from her parent’s freezer and gently pressing it to one of her cheeks.

[y/n] sighs, before whispering low enough for gwen to hear, “who do you think?”

she doesn’t need to look up at her best friend to know that both the protective and sad expression — the one that gwen wore when she had first found out the truth behind [y/n]’s family — is forming on her face.

“again? oh my god, honey. i—i’m so sorry.” she murmurs, frowning as she moves to sit beside her best friend and places an arm around her shoulder, careful not to put any pressure on any of the injured areas of her body.

[y/n] simply sighs and allows herself to hide her head in gwen’s chest, zoning out numbly for god know’s how long.

several minutes later, a knock is heard on the door, knocking both [y/n] and gwen out of their own thoughts.

when [y/n] lifts up her head from gwen’s chest and gwen herself opens the door and it’s revealed to be peter, asking if [y/n] is there, she jumps up off of the couch so fast — despite her many injuries.

she winces because of this.

but, all she knows in that moment, is that she hopes that she can keep peter from seeing her face.

god, how will she be able to explain that?

but, it’s too late.

because gwen has already stepped aside for peter to walk inside, who’s eyes instantly catching [y/n]’s bloodied and bruised face.

peter’s jaw drops, mouth gaping open at her as he stares at her in utter shock and concern.

although, his worry for her is multiplied by the fact that he knows how painful bruises can be because of his secret identity as the neighborhood’s friendly spider-man.

but, before peter can even begin to question her, [y/n] races down the hall to gwen’s bedroom, hurries inside, and slams the door shut with her back against it, breaths coming out in uneven pants.

what was she supposed to do now? there was no way that he didn’t see it.

back in the living room, peter turns back to gwen, the worry clear on his face.

“what the hell happened to her? i—is she okay?” he questions, brows knitted together in an alarmed tone of voice.

“peter…” gwen hesitates, not wanting to betray her best friend’s trust, but also knowing deep down that peter has every right to know what happened.

as if understanding what she’s thinking, peter sighs.

“please. just… please, just tell me what happened. if i’m going to talk to her, i need to know what’s going on.” he gently pushes, the instinctive feeling of the protectiveness he feels over [y/n] consuming him, still.

gwen still hesitates.

“gwen, you and i both know that she won’t tell me, no matter what happens. you know how she is when she goes through stuff — she never wants to tell anyone because she thinks that she would be burdening them.”

gwen caves after a few seconds of silence. deep down, she knows he’s right.

i mean, it’s literally a miracle that [y/n] even showed up to seek comfort from gwen in the first place — she never depends on others, always only dealing with it on her own. it’s the only way she knows how to survive.

“her dad.” she murmurs so quietly that peter almost thinks he misheard her.

“excuse me? it sounded like you just said her dad did that to her.” he questions, raising his eyebrows expectantly, waiting for her to correct him.

but, she doesn’t.

she just sighs and gives him a look that clearly suggests that she’s not lying.

“gwen,” he suddenly says, voice cracking. “i—please. please, just tell me it wasn’t her fucking dad.”

upon noticing the silence and the way gwen stays quiet, he flinches, tears beginning to cloud his eyes as the truth finally sinks in and the denial dissipates.

“oh man…” he mumbles, his hands going into his hair, tugging at the brown strands in stress as he mentally lectures himself for not seeing it.

“peter, i’m sorry. i know you deserve to know, but i just didn’t want to betray her trust. she’s been through a lot. and this is one of the biggest situations that’s affected her the most, y’know?” she sighs and places a comforting hand on his shoulder, relating to the emotions that he’s feeling now — the simplest emotions known as shock and anxiety, but still the most consuming ones to feel.

in a fit of hurt over not knowing the truth — especially, when it was quite literally right in front of him — peter shrugs off her hand and turns around.

then, he starts walking down the hallway to gwen’s bedroom, where his best friend is currently hiding in.

“peter, wait!” gwen whispers, worrying that he may say something he doesn’t mean during his frustration over [y/n] not telling him the truth.

with a groan, he reluctantly turns to face her. “what?”

“y—you can’t just march in there. she’s hurting.” she whisper-yells back, raising a brow when he throws his hands up in the air in further frustration.

“well, what am i supposed to do, then, gwen? like you said, she’s hurting. and i wasn’t there to protect her.” he grumbles, wanting to just hurry into the room and comfort [y/n].

when she doesn’t say anything else, he turns back to the door of gwen’s bedroom and knocks on it. “[y/n]? it’s peter. can… can i come in?”

peter’s soft and gentle voice — despite being worried and upset — is heard through the door, after his gently hesitant knock on it, bringing [y/n]’s breath to easily hitch in her throat, anxiety quickly consuming her.

so many nervous thoughts swirl around in her head, causing her to completely get lost in them and forget about opening the door, once she backs away from it.

when silence is the only response peter gets, gwen sighs as he turns to her with a defeated look in his eyes.

after seeing the hurt look in her friend’s eyes, gwen sighs and walks over to the door, knocking on it as soft as possible, before speaking, “[y/n]? hun, i know you’re scared and hurting. and we’re both here for you. always. but…” she trails off, looking back over at peter, who’s no longer paying attention to the conversation as he moves to sit down and lean against the door with his head in hands.

[y/n]’s head snaps up in surprise as she waits for best friend to finish what she’s saying, already having forgotten the internal battle in her mind about letting in the boy she loves, or not.

“look, it’s understandable to be scared. i get that. but, peter cares about you, just as much as you care for him. and he’s worried sick about you. he has been for awhile. so, please, just talk to him when you’re ready. i’ll be in the living room, if you need anything.” hearing her words, [y/n] anxiously gnaws on her bottom lip, trying to come up with a decision.

she does want to tell peter the truth. she knows that if she does, he’d give her all the comfort that she desperately needs.

but, there’s another part of her that’s scared that he’s just using the time to comfort her as an advantage to get more time with gwen, even though they carry no romantic feelings for each other, whatsoever.

of course, she knows that peter would never use her like that, but she just can’t help but think it.

just as she inches towards gwen’s bedroom door, hand just inches away from the doorknob as she has finally come to a decision, her heart stops when she hears what peter does and says next.

with a heavy sigh, he moves to stand up and faces gwen with a look of acceptance placed on his face.

“y—you know what, gwen? maybe… maybe i should just go. i should just respect [y/n]’s decision — i don’t want to push her to talk to me, if she’s not ready.”

gwen hesitates, feeling bad for both of her friends, and wishing that she could do something — anything — to get them to just admit how they feel.

she just wants them to be happy.

“i—i’m just gonna get out of here. text me if anything happens.” he murmurs, trying to ignore the crack in his voice as gwen sighs and wordlessly nods, before he’s walking down the hall.

in the next moment, [y/n] doesn’t hesitate, instantly losing the fear that was holding her back from opening up to peter as a new fear of losing him tonight replaces it.

in just seconds, she’s twisting the knob and throwing the door open hurriedly, surprising gwen.

but, [y/n] doesn’t pay any attention to this as she races after peter.

“p—peter! wait!” she calls after him, rushing towards him, until she’s stood right behind him as he stops.

once he turns to face her, she immediately notices his tearful gaze.

they’re both quiet for a moment, just staring at each other.

but, as if she catches herself, she clears her throat and shakes her head abruptly, knocking peter himself out of his own longing daze towards her.

“peter… i—i’m sorry.” she whispers, tears of her own now surfacing to her eyes.

his brows furrow together in confusion.

“you’re sorry? f—for what? you didn’t do anything wrong.” he murmurs, still very much confused.

[y/n]’s own eyebrows knit together, finding it hard to believe that he thinks she did nothing wrong.

“i did nothing wrong? peter, i have a lot to be sorry for,” she mumbles, shaking her head when his confused expression stays placed on his face. “i didn’t tell you about my dad… and my… well, my feelings for you.”

it’s hard to get the words out.

because as much as she’s not sure what gwen meant when she’d said that peter cared about her just as much she did him, she needs to admit it.

it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t feel the same.

she just can’t bare to lie to him anymore.

it had been beyond exhausting, pretending to be just friends and acting as if she only sees him as that, when she feels so much more for him.

peter’s brows raise in shock as he sputters. “s—so, it’s true? you have feelings for me?” he questions.

he scoffs when she nods.

“i… i never thought… i mean, gwen said that you obviously did, but i just couldn’t believe that someone as incredibly amazing as you could ever carry those type of feelings for someone like me…” he trails his statement off, not even paying attention to [y/n]’s reaction to his words.

she flinches in shock.

“w—what? peter… what do you mean, ‘someone like you’?” she questions, titling her head to the side in further confusion.

as peter stutters once more, gwen takes the private moment between her friends as the opportunity to sneak into her bedroom, desperately hoping that giving them the privacy will finally give them the chance to not only admit how they feel towards each other, but to also just make things official.

“i—i mean, you’re such a good person and i’m not that special. i can’t really grasp the thought of you actually feeling that way about me.” he explains, barely noticing gwen slipping away from the hall and into her bedroom.

now, it’s [y/n]’s turn to scoff.

“are you actually kidding me, parker? have you met you?” she questions him in disbelief, shaking her head at him as he shrugs, obviously trying to pretend that he isn’t making a big deal out of this, even though, he very much is.

“peter parker, do you have any idea how special and important you are? how much i value you… and who you are to me?” she asks, her eyes sparkling with absolute adoration for the dorky boy standing in front of her.

he opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out, as he notices the love and adoration for him in her eyes.

“god, parker…” she mumbles, still in shock of his answers.

without another thought of the memory of her having a super swollen face of bruises from her father, or the thought of her insecurities over gwen being the one everyone went for, instead of her, [y/n] impulsively places her hands on his cheeks and pulls him down to her height, placing her lips onto his in a soft and urgent kiss, showing him just how much he means to her.

a strangled sound of shock leaves his lips, causing him to instantly freeze in place.

but, once he realizes what’s going on, he immediately melts into her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

when she pulls away, [y/n] rests her forehead against his and breathes heavily, desperately gasping for air, before eventually whispering, “i know there’s a chance that you may not feel the same… and i’ll still always be here for you, even if it’s just as friends. but, i really needed to do that, at least once.”

she giggles as he laughs with her, gently placing his hands on her cheeks, careful to not put too much pressure on her bruises.

as the moment passes, and their temples are still pressed together, peter sighs, his eyes softening as concern fills him.

“i cannot believe your dad did this to you. what kind of man puts his hands on his own blood? his own daughter?” his voice comes out rough, something very unlikely of peter parker.

she sighs, looking up at him as she quickly becomes shocked at the anger in his voice.

of course, it’s not at her, but at her father.

she gulps, closing her eyes for a brief moment.

“a man who’s unsatisfied with his life does. but… it’s okay.”

he scoffs once more. “how is that okay? he could’ve really hurt you, [y/n]. i hate that i wasn’t there to protect you… i should’ve been there — i should’ve stayed.”

he fully pulls away from her as she opens her eyes with a soft smile placed on her lips, despite all that she’s been through.

“because i’m okay. besides, he doesn’t get to hurt me that much — i’m usually at gwen’s, or hanging out with you. so, i barely am at home.” she explains, but hesitates with her words when she sees the frown placed on his face.

“peter?” she whispers, cupping his cheeks in worry.

he lets out a gruff, “yes?”

“you know it’s not your fault, right? you… you couldn’t have known. and besides, it doesn’t matter that you weren’t there before — you’re here now.” she whispers, frowning at him.

he sighs, but nods.

“i’m just glad that you’re okay.” he mumbles.

“i—i really don’t know what i’d do, if you didn’t survive that. i would literally lose my mind without you in my life.”

[y/n] tilts her head in confusion.

“but… what about gwen? surely, she’d help you move on, right? you… you’d be happy with her.” she whispers, despite the fact that saying those words hurt her on a whole other level — she still isn’t sure where they stand, and whether he loves her or gwen.

and despite her insecurities, if he does love gwen the way she wishes he’d love her, she wouldn’t be bitter and she’d try to move on.

because no matter how bad being a last choice compared to gwen makes her feel, gwen is still like a sister to her, and she wants happiness for her just as much as she wants her own.

peter growls at her statement. “why do you talk like that?”

her eyes widen in shock for a split second, before she responds, “l—like what? what do you mean?”

“like you’re expendable… and like you don’t matter just as much as her! i know you’ve had self-confidence issues throughout the past few years, but you’re not a last choice. do you not get that?”

her brows knit together and tears cloud her vision.

“i—i don’t mean it like that. i just… i can’t see a world where you pick me, when she exists right in front of you. you’d be a fool not to pick her…” she whispers, voice raspy and croaking as the tears fall to her cheeks.

noticing this, peter sighs, rolling his eyes at her not seeing what he sees her as.

“because i love you. i don’t love her — she’s like a sister to me, and besides,” he pauses to wipe away her tears carefully. “you better get used to disappointment because i’m going pick you every damn time, baby.”

then, a shaky breath leaves her lips as they tremble.

“r—really? you… do you mean that, peter?”

without a second’s hesitation he nods. “yes. i’ve always loved you. and i’m not going to stop now.”

and with that, he pulls her in for a careful, but passionate kiss, both of them losing themselves in each other.

they’re both too distracted to notice their very best friend, gwen stacy, who had stepped back out into the hall to get a snack, standing with the biggest, happiest smile on her lips as she watches them finally get their happy ending — that’s what she always wanted for them.

and now? peter had finally gotten the one person he could show all his love and adoration to, and [y/n] finally got the boy of her dreams, who could show her what being loved is like, and how she could grow to love herself again.

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itsdanii · 3 years

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i loved the rejecting and regretting series!! could you do one with akaashi and osamu? thanks again!!

Hey, bub. Thank you so much for requesting. I'm happy that you're loving my works, it makes my heart soft 😭♥️ Here's your request! I hope you have a good day and stay hydrated. Mwah!

Rejecting you and regretting it pt. 5

genre: angst to fluff

warnings: rude behavior (resolved), cursing

a/n: Do read the warnings before you proceed. Warnings have been put there for a reason.

ft. akaashi keiji, osamu miya

Title says it all

Akaashi Keiji

With your grades in literature almost at the brink of destruction, you had to swallow your pride and ask one of your classmates to tutor you

While you're the best in most subject areas, you sucked when it comes to literature

You didn't see the point of studying articles, analyzing literary pieces and using poetic words

But for the sake of graduating, you had to take the subject

But it seemed like the subject hated you just as much as you hated it

And so, one afternoon, you slammed a limited edition book you knew Akaashi, your classmate and your crush, liked on his desk and stared at him with pleading eyes as you begged him to tutor you

At first, he rejected the offer, opting to pat your head before leaving the classroom

But you were persistent

It wasn't long then when he started taking pity on you

All your papers had red marks in them and everytime there was a test, you would stare blankly at your paper and jot down nonsense ideas

At the sight of you in the brink of tears, Akaashi sighed and decided to help, given that you have to focus and not do random stuff during your sessions

And that's how you found yourself in this current situation - hand holding the pen tightly, your eyes focused on the man in front of you instead of the story analysis he's explaining, and your heart beating as if you just finished a 5km run

"Are you even listening?"

You blinked your eyes at him and smiled sheepishly before scratching the back of your head. You knew that a small blush was probably visible on your cheeks now but of course, you had to play it cool.

"Of course," you said with a confident nod. "You were uh, talking about young love."

Akaashi rose an eyebrow at your answer as if challenging you to elaborate.

"The main character was in love with the guy... and the guy doesn't like her? And she-" you paused for a moment and grabbed the book you were reading, eyes scanning between the lines before continuing your probably wrong answer. "She died?"

With a sigh, Akaashi stood up and sat beside you, your elbows pressing against each other as he leaned down to write something on your book.

"Okay, first and foremost, she didn't die. She left. This part here-"

As he continued explaining, you felt yourself getting lost once again. Your eyes scanned over his features, taking notice of how long his lashes were and how flawless his skin was that you were almost tempted to caress it. His scent surrounded you for being too close which tempted you to shut your eyes.

"I like you," you blurted out unconsciously.

The both of you froze as soon as the words escaped your lips, eyes widening and lips parting as you stared at each other with shocked expressions.

Fuck.

Aaashi, who was the first to compose himself, cleared his throat before sitting upright. "Y/n-san, I'm really flattered by your infatuation but you do know that I'm only here to tutor you, right? We agreed to focus. We're supposed to be studying, not flirting with each other."

"I know but..."

"I can't accept your confession, I'm sorry," Akaashi said before sighing. "How about we end this session already? I don't want your mind wandering while I talk here knowing that you're out of focus."

You immediately shook your head no. "It's okay, Keiji. You don't have to like me back, you know? Just let me like you. You can just pretend that nothing happened. I promise I won't do anything that'll make you feel uncomfortable."

Despite your facade, Akaashi knew that you were forcing yourself to act unbothered. It wasn't really hard to figure you out. Like a book, he could read you within seconds and know exactly what you were thinking and how you were feeling, and at this moment, he knew that you were just pretending.

For the sake of not making you feel uncomfortable and guilty, Akaashi nodded before continuing his explanation regarding the story.

Surprisingly, you stayed true to your words. You didn't say anything out of the line nor forced your confession to him. Akaashi admired you for that since most of the girls whom asked him for help from the past were only after his looks and the sake of getting in his pants.

As your session came to an end, you stretched your arms out. You released a breath of relief before smiling at him. "Thank you so much for teaching me, and I'm sorry for taking so much of your time."

You started keeping your things and piling up the books you're going to borrow from the library. Standing up, you gave him a small bow before grabbing your bag. "I'll see you around then?"

Akaashi just nodded and watched as you made your way out of the library, not knowing how hard you were gripping the books you had in your hand.

That night, you cried your eyes out. Sure, at your age, it may seem childish to cry over someone, but this was Akaashi we're talking about.

The Akaashi Keiji.

The one whom you've liked ever since your first year in college. The one you've liked the moment you saw him sleeping inside a nearly empty library, several cups of coffee and littered paper surrounding his table as if he had been studying the whole night. The one who never noticed you but you never failed to notice.

Your Akaashi, or at least in your dreams, he was yours.

You stared at the now empty tub of icecream on your lap and sniffled. Grabbing another roll of tissue, you began to wipe your tears and your runny nose before playing another cliche romance movie to soothe your broken heart.

Your study sessions with Akaashi continued for a couple more weeks but unlike your previous meetings, you weren't as enthusiastic.

You were focused and attentive, but it just wasn't the same. Akaashi noticed how you would try to put a bit of distance between the two of you, how you would avoid looking at him in the eye, and how you avoided touching him.

But what he noticed the most, were your swollen eyes the day after you confessed to him. He knew that there was only a 50% chance that it was because of how you were rejected by him, and yet he felt an immense feeling of regret. The moment he saw you, he realized that he never wanted to see you like that again.

But he didn't know how to approach you. No, you didn't ignore him like the other girls do. You also didn't say any nasty remarks nor talk shit about him.

What you did was pretend as if everything was okay, as if nothing happened. It felt normal... too normal.

And it terrified him.

One time during your break, you slipped a test paper in front of him, a big A+ written on the sheet of paper making Akaashi lift his eyes from the paper towards you.

"You did good," Akashi said with a proud smile.

"Mhm, I guess I did," you said before taking the paper from him. "I wouldn't have gotten this score if it weren't for you though. Thank you."

He shook his head no before leaning back on his chair. "That was all on you. All I did was guide you."

"This might be our last study session."

"What?" Akaashi said as he stared at you with an expression you can't quite decipher.

"I mean... I don't think I need any more help. I feel like I can manage on my own already and I've no one to thank but you." You looked away from him before continuing, "I think it would benefit the two of us if we stop this already. While I'm grateful for you, I don't think that it's good for me anymore. I thought that if I acted like it didn't matter then it wouldn't, but Keiji..."

"No," Akashi said with a shake of his head.

"What do you.."

"I don't want to stop this." Gripping his hair, Akaashi, took in a deep breath before reaching for your hand.

"Y/n, I don't want to go back to how things were before. I don't want to be just your classmate. I'll miss how you would stare off into space and daydream while I'm explaining to you and I'm going to miss how you would make up answers just to prove that you were listening when in fact you weren't. I'm going to miss you, and I know that if we stop this study sessions... I may never get the opportunity to be this close to you again, and I don't like that."

Akaashi squeezed your hand in his and intertwined your fingers. "I like you. I like you so much that it scares me."

"Keiji.. look at me, please," you said softly as you tried to take your hand back.

Feeling your movements, Akaashi tightened his hold on you and shook his head no. "Y/n..."

"I'm not going to leave," you assured him and smiled when he finally let go of your hand.

Akaashi watched as you stood up from your seat and made your way to his side. He was then surprised when you suddenly sat on his lap and wrapped your arms around him.

"Did you really mean what you said?" you asked which made him immediately nod.

"Of course. I really do like you." Akaashi carefully wrapped his arms around your waist, watching for any negative reaction, and pulling you closer when he didn't receive any. "You're sitting on my lap and basically hugging me. Does this mean that you still like me?"

"Of course, Keiji," you said with a smile.

"Then..." Akaashi collected your hair to one side and gently placed his hand on your nape, his eyes traveling down from your eyes to your lips. "Can I kiss you?"

With a simple nod from you, Akaashi pressed his lips against yours.

a/n: yes, you made out in the library. This is Akaashi were talking about and there's no way I wont take the opportunity to make out with him in the library lmao.

Osamu Miya

You were one of the lucky fans of the Miya twins, specifically Osamu's

Why? Because you're Aran Ojiro's sister and that meant that you can freely see your crush any time of the day

The team basically treats you as their own sister

Although it gives you a lot of perks, it also had its disadvantages

Because no matter how much you try hinting your feelings towards a certain Miya, he just won't acknowledge it

In fact, you didn't get along with him

Unlike the rest of the team, Osamu would always pick on you

You actually didn't expect it to happen because you thought that Atsumu was the playful one among them

But boy did Osamu prove you wrong

There weren't any time of the day that you won't pick at each other, spouting remarks here and there until the other gives up

It never went overboard though. You both knew your limits and when to stop

Or at least that's what you thought

Because today, he chose to target the wrong topic

You were currently seated in the middle of the court with the rest of the team. All of you were in the form of a circle with an empty bottle in the middle.

It was Atsumu's idea to play a game of truth or dare before you all go home. According to him, it would be effective on "cooling" off their bodies from the intense practice. Even Kita was forced to participate, thanks to Atsumu's constant whining.

With a wide grin, Atsumu spun the bottle which made most of you take in a deep breath due to the anticipation.

Finally, the bottle stopped. The tip was pointed at you while the other side was pointed towards Atsumu.

"Y/n! How lucky of ya! Truth or dare?" he asked with a wiggle of his brows.

"Truth." You couldn't help but roll your eyes after that, knowing that what's to come will probably be something silly.

Except it wasn't.

"Then... If yer given the chance to date someone from the team, who would it be?" Atsumu asked proudly, giving Osamu a side glance before focusing on you again.

You heard your brother groaning from beside you making you giggle. Placing his arm on top of your head, Aran gave each of the members a glare.

"Hm... I'd probably date 'S-"

Before you could even finish your sentence, Osamu let out a loud chuckle. All eyes snapped to his direction, watching him in confusion.

"Sorry, sorry," Osamu said after composing himself. "Did ya really have to ask that? Of course she'd pick Suna. Haven't ya notice the way she looks at him every practice?"

"Huh?" Suna muttered absentmindedly, his eyes lifting up from his phone towards Osamu.

"Don't even try denying it, y/n. Plus, even if ya try, I know Suna will basically reject ya. I mean, I can't even stand ya. If it were me, I'd reject ya on the spot. Yer annoying and too loud and that thing ya do with yer hand when yer explaining? Super annoying. Ah! And don't ferget the way yer nose scrunches when yer deep in thought," Osamu said without any pause.

Once he was done, he titled his head a bit to the side, trying to peek at your face that was now casted downwards, your hair covering most of your face. "Oh, are ya crying? Did I ruin yer confession?"

To his surprise, there were indeed tears streaming down your cheeks when you lifted your head up. Everyone grew silent, completely shocked at the sight.

"I was going to confess to you, dumbass." With that, you stood up, grabbed your bag and ran out of the gym.

Aran immediately stood up to follow you, but not before throwing a glare to Osamu.

Atsumu, who was the first to break the silence, turned towards his twin. "Okay, I know that I'm dumber among the two of us but that was a real jerk move right there, 'Samu."

Osamu could only stare at the gym doors with shock and regret written on his face.

"You're on the bench until I'm sure that you and y/n-san made up," Kita simply said before standing up. "Game's over. Let's all go home."

The following days, you avoided Osamu like a plague. It even reached the point that you have to eat lunch inside your classroom instead of eating with the team like you usually do.

Even Aran was pissed at Osamu. Aran knew that a playful banter was normal between you and Osamu but never had it ever reached this point.

You were basically crying all night when you arrived home and if not for Aran's patience, you wouldn't have went home in the first place. When you left the gym, your brother found you in a nearby park, your knees up to your chest and your head hidden from view.

He wasn't oblivious about your feelings towards Osamu but he never mentioned about since he wanted you to tell him or any of the members when you're comfortable enough. It was only unfortunate that the moment you felt confident enough to confess, Osamu had to pull that shit on you.

"C'mon, Aran. I need to talk to them," Osamu pleaded as he tried to get pass your brother.

Aran stood firmly infront of your apartment, his arms crossed over his chest and his figure blocking the door. "You really have the audacity to march your way to our apartment after the shit you put my sibling through? What, you got tired of sitting on the bench during matches? Can't impress your fanclub anymore? Go home, Miya."

"I'm sorry, okay? I wanted to apologize to them but they've been avoiding me. This is my last resort." Osamu said and gripped his hair in frustration.

Once he saw a peek of you trying to hide yourself behind a wall, Osamu immediately grabbed the opportunity. "Y/n, I'm sorry! Talk to me, please! I... I don't know what to do anymore. I'm sorry..."

You soften at the pleading voice of Osamu and revealed yourself from behind the wall. Walking over to the door, you placed a hand on Aran's shoulder. "Give us space to talk, please?"

Your brother threw a glance at Osamu and sighed at the determined look on his face. "Alright," he muttered before turning towards you. "Call me if anything happens, alright?"

Upon hearing you hum in agreement, Aran placed a hand on your head to ruffle your hair, chuckling as he heard you whining before he went out.

You invited Osamu inside your apartment, making sure to close the door before settling yourselves on the living room.

"Water?" you asked out of courtesy but Osamu only shook his head no. "Talk then."

Osamu felt an unsettling feeling inside him at your dismissive tone. "I'm sorry," he mumbled.

"I was used to havin' banters with ya that I didn't realize that I was already sayin' too much. I didn't mean to hurt yer feelings, y/n. I know that it may sound ridiculous considerin' how harsh I was to ya but I really didn't mean those words."

You listened attentively to him as he continued to apologize, your tears once again flowing down your cheeks as you remembered everything that happened. "I really like you, 'Samu. I don't even know how or why but I just do and I guess I was hurt, not only because you rejected me but also humiliated me. I don't deserve that," you said and brought your knees up to your chest, clutching the throw blanket as you sobbed.

Osamu was beside you in an instant, his arms enclosing you as he pulled you to his lap. "I know...I know. I'm sorry," he whispered as he rubbed your back soothingly. "I guess I got blinded by jealousy. I thought that ya were going to say Suna's name so I assumed that ya like him."

Wiping your nose with the sleeve of the hoodie you're wearing, you looked up at him with a frown. "Jealousy? I thought you hated me. Why would you even feel jealous?"

"Do I really have to spell it out fer ya?" Seeing you nod, Osamu sighed and pressed your face to his chest in order to hide his flustered cheeks. "I like ya, okay? I always pick on ya because I wanted yer attention. I didn't actually expect ya to fight back but ya did. That's why I was intrigued by ya, and if ya still like m-"

"Yes," you answered without even letting him finish. With your face still buried to his chest, you could hear his heartbeat picking up. You pulled away from the hug and looked up at him, you cheeks still slightly damp from crying.

"Yer not kiddin'?" Osamu asked as he stared at you, his hand reaching up to wipe your cheeks with his thumb.

"I'm not. I'm still a little hurt so you have to make it up to me, but my feelings? They're still here," you answered honestly.

A smile made its way to Osamu's lips upon hearing what you said. Pressing his forehead with yours, he tightened his arms around your waist to hold you closer. "Thank ya fer givin' me another chance, angel."

After making up and stealing kisses here and there, you and Osamu decided to cuddle on the couch, your back against his chest and his arm resting against your waist.

It safe to say that when Aran came back, the most sour expression made its way to his face. It hadn't even been two weeks when he witnessed you literally crying your eyes out and now, he comes back to you sleeping on the couch with the man that made you cry.

"Fuck my life," Aran muttered with a groan.

Likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated ♥️

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strangecreationchaos · 2 years

Text

some explanations i get from antis who hates acotar and don't ship elriel because

they are scared of the twist sarah brings in her stories like they always gives me the example of tamlin and feyre, chaol and aelin.. to express how sarah is going to twist the tale ! which simply tells some of them haven't yet moved on from the feylin and chaolena ending! but the fact is you don't have to ship a new ship just becoz you are scared of the past experiences you can simply accept the changes.. it's not like sarah has ever twisted her whole story in a single page! she always let them build the relationship first. rowan elain took a whole book to build their relationship! and it took another book to confess and finally accept eachother! feysand happened on a single book and all their build up was connected with the first book! it was the under the mountain plot where rhys was helping feyre in every possible way was the plot that clearly said they are going to be a thing in future!

elain and azriel will be boring together! wait! now tell me which exact characters of sarah j maas were boring? yrene was boring? elide was boring? yrene got a full book for herself where she did everything with her power saved the world kill the king! and even saved chaol! was that boring? wait do u really think that elain is just going to tend to her garden if she get a whole book for herself? a seer! who already showed a glimpse of her power in all previous books! even held a dagger to kill the king ! are you expecting her to be the soft and silent flower girl making bread and building garden for herself in a whole book! why both nesta and rhysand said that she is finally being interesting?? if the author have to write the same tale about her why she said elain is getting interesting? why she took nesta's power! and make elain the last and only choice to deal with the rest of the queens and koschai? and the trove! what is the meaning of making her the villian when she with her mighty powers gifted by the Cauldron can help the highlords to win the war!

did sarah ever come up with a bad plot? which one is it? do u remember dorian? his lover was beheaded infront him ,a demon was living inside his body yet sarah made him the good guy! he again found love ! why would she make elain evil ? what is the meaning of ignoring canon ship with four books of story build up?

yeah everyone can have their own ship and can choose whom they wants to follow! its simple ! as it is . you can praise your gwynriel ship or elucien ship and enjoy your fandom within your people! but what is the meaning of mocking another ship day and night! and demeaning an author's characters whose book you are reading for so many years! why would you do that? she is putting her years of efforts in writing her books! and now people are mocking even the main characters!

what is the meaning of mocking and hating feysand? if you don't even like the main characters why you even read the book? if you you only ship nesta then why are you ignoring her character development in the whole series? did nesta ended up alone at the end ? why calling inner circle toxic? when nesta at the end of the day becomes a part of it?

what is the meaning of comparing azriel with tamlin to say he is wrong for elain while you are shipping him with gwyn? wasn't he will be wrong for gwyn as well?

what is the meaning of calling azriel and elain toxic for showing attraction for eachother and shipping gwyn and azriel who using her for distraction!

if elucien is a thing! why you don't have the answer to what lucien did to understand his own mate?

why there is a bunch of people have to defend elain's character when the author haven't said a single bit of evil thing about her in the book?.why azriel is being compared with tamlin while azriel did so much for his people that tamlin could never have done !

why you guys are hating every single character and yet reading the book?

#acotar #acotar series #acotar fandom #sarah j maas #pro elain #pro azriel #pro elriel #acosf #acomaf #acowar #acofas #sjm books #sjm ships #anti gw*nriel #anti el*cien

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lovee-infected · 4 years

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Hello! Recently I've seen a lot of twst blogs arguing on how twst characters are mischaracterized, especially Malleus. So do you have any ideas on how he is mischaracterized? Also, is it okay to ask for your general opinion on questions like a short character analysis or how a healthy a relationship with each twdt guy might be? Hope it's okay to ask!

For your first question anon, it's a GREAT thing to ask and to be honest I've been waiting for a chance to talk about him! And for your second one, yes, of course! I just love writing character analyis and it's totally okay to ask for character/personality/relationship analysis here! I've got a lot to say about Malleus so this is going to a detailed analysis about his whole personality.

There are commonly two popular opinions on how Malleus is which divides the fandom into two groups:

Group A:

Those who consider him to be an absolutely soft, baby dragon who just wants to be invited and have a friend. They believe that Malleus needs more attention and can be quite affectionate at the time, he can also be sometimes idiotic toward simple stuff like working with a computer or trying to talk with others which makes him even more adorable. "Despite Malleus's harsh and emo appearance and terrifying powers, Malleus is just a small baby inside," is also a common belief of this group.

Group B:

Those who argue that group A is totally shading everything important about Malleus's personality and true self just because he looks cute and plays with a childish tamagotchi. These group also comes up with rather strong points about his personality such as his status as a crown prince, his naturally dark personality as not only a dark fae but also Maleficent's grandchild, his maturity and cold nature and also, the aspect of his hellish powers which can make him look like an absolute monster at the time.

I believe most of you are familiar with these points of view but the question is, which one of them is the real Malleus?

And the answer is: Neither of them; yet both of them do have a point.

The main problem is how the fandom portraits him as either an emotional tamagotchi baby or an absolutely cold and heartless mister of evil, while the true Malleus is far beyond than just being either good, or bad.

Now let's discuss some of the important facts and common mistakes about Malleus's personality:

(1) Malleus isn't a baby, but he isn't a monster either

This is supposedly the main idea here which will be continued to be discussed through the rest of this analysis. This is often how many end up mischaracterizing him because: the way the describe Malleus is either too dark or too childish. What we need here, is a balance. This is the grandson of one of the most important Disney villains that we are talking about, and don't forget that Maleficent herself was confirmed to consume the powers of Hell, as she was indeed the mistress of all evil. So this dragon boy here surely isn't one to underestimate, and he clearly has inherited that hellish power of her grandmother. It's obviously seen through the story as well, from the way he was presented in chapter 2 and beans day event to how terrified other students always are to even talk about him.

But the thing is, there are softer aspects of his personality as well which prove that Malleus isn't just designed to present an undefeatable force of evil, and this is exactly what makes his personality a lot more interesting.

(2) Malleus is actually hard to approach and talk to

Let's be honest, Malleus isn't as soft and easy to befriend as many fans consider him to be. He doesn't get too friendly or chill as he speaks, and even his close allies like Silver and Sebek fail to get close to him as much as they wish to. When we talk about his dark aura, we aren't just talking about his horns and fearsome magic, it's also because of his personality itself. His calm yet cold tone always remains still regardless of who he's talking to. No need to mention that he isn't an ordinary student either, he not only comes from a well-known family but is also the crown-prince of valley of thorns. Out of all twst characters Malleus is the only one who is directly connected to the great seven by being Maleficent's grandson. His family and people on the other hand are overly protective over him, to the point of not letting him to even have a fake proposal in the ghost marriage event which means that Malleus has also got each and every of his actions under watch.

(3) He's slowly getting used to isolating himself

In his ceremonial robes story, he's obviously upset that he never had a chance to wear his ceremonial robes because he never got invited, but when Lilia says he'd one day overcome his ill fate and gets to wear them as he always wanted to, he says that he's fine. Then again when Lilia tried to bring him to the singing test in chapter 5 he avoids showing up. In his voice lines he also said: "Are you as well scared of me?" which is clearly shouting that he's no longer surprised to see people being afraid of him, he's getting used to being feared and at some point, hated. That's probably one of the bitter sides of his personality which he's slowly giving up on trying to change it.

(4) Malleus has got a great confidence and isn't shy at all

There many fanfics in which Malleus is presented as a shy boy who's scared of confessing to his s/o or asking them out, while he's the total opposite in reality. Just like Maleficent herself, he speaks calmly and in a formal tone, is very respectful as he speaks, and isn't one to ever have problem while talking to others.

It's others who always avoid talking to him while Malleus himself isn't the least uncomfortable with presenting his ideas and asking others for help when he needs to.

He isn't ever shy over his lack of ability to work with machines or asking others for help for seemingly childish issues like having his tamagotchi fixed or finding a friend for the GaoGao dragon.

The only thing left is how Lilia described him as "Kind of shy" in chapter five, which is most likely because of another reason discussed in part (3)

(5) He doesn't eat ice cream and play with a tamagotchi for no reason

Malleus explained that everything is ran by magic back in the valley of thorns and no one really uses any machines there, that's how he's pretty new to both technology and complicated tools.

I believe that the tamagotchi part was given to him on purpose, because else than showing the fact that he's bad with tools, it's great contrast to the harsh picture that his power and personality gives him!

Admit it, it's a funny and somehow, adorable contrast to see one of the strongest magicians who can burn the room to ashes in just a matter pf second playing with a children's toy. And I believe that it was given to him on purpose. They meant to give him some soft and cute features as well instead of just presenting him as an evil fae. He is indeed evil and his powers are terrifying, and that's how watching him play with a tamagotchi is rather surprising to many. If you saw Ortho or Cheka playing with one it wouldn't have gone any further than a simple "Awww" or "How cute" because it's something you'd expect to see from a kid, but when you see Malleus of all people playing with it, you can't help but to fascinated and flustered over how cute this fae's habits can be.

Ice cream on the other hand doesn't really have to do with cuteness, it's something Yana Toboso discovered while doing her researches on fae mythology which discuses that Dark faes enjoy cold and sweet foods, especially cream. So it doesn't really have anything to do with him being either a soft or a cruel boy, it's just a normal part of his nature as a fae.

(6) He might be crazily old to humans, but he's still pretty young as a fae

This one has really been getting on my nerves, come on people! It's true that he's probably been living for decades and possibly, centuries but don't forget that it isn't that much compared to a normal fae! Even Sebek calls him 'Young master' which means that he's still a pretty young one, no need to mention that he hasn't yet became the king either so he's not much different from the rest of the students in NRC.

I've seen people saying: "No Malleus won't do that he's -too old-" and I've got to say: What?

Come on even someone like Lilia who's been living for over 5 centuries can act like a nasty 14 year old at the time, so for faes at least, age isn't a limitation.

Malleus on the other hand is still a teenage fae! He needs to discover new things and talk with more people, just like a normal human being does. So if he doesn't enjoy doing anything too silly or stupid, it's because of his 'personality', not because he's too old. Even when tells Lilia that he isn't a child anymore, it's like how an 18 year old says it to his father.

(7) Malleus won't take insult easily

He is polite and respectful in general, but when he's offended, he'd seriously respond to it. Remember that a single swipe of hand from him can set the whole room on fire.

Rook and Leona were probably one step away from being burnt and when Leona really got on Malleus's nerves by humiliating him, Malleus stopped respecting him as a prince of an ally kingdom and humiliated back.

He is calm but to a specific point, and you can make sure that he won't be any soft or forgiving if you offend him, and it'll probably end in no good if he gets mad. So better not think that Malleus is one to just keep it in and later cry in a room because he's sad baby when someone dares insult him.

(8) Angelina Jolie's Maleficent has nothing to do with his story!

Nope, Malleus never had a lover who cut off his wings and sent him to a hell of depression and loneliness, and no you cannot find those two wounds on his back regardless of how romantic it may seem.

I admit it, it's a lovely Au, but it's JUST AN AU! I can still see people saying stuff like "Ohh!! Will we discover if Malleus too had his wings cut off in chapter 7?" and the answer is NO. While Angelina Jolie's Maleficent is surely a great one on its own, it needs be understood that twst's source of main information and characters designs is nothing else than the original Disney villains.

Malleus cannot be associated with any Maleficents else than the version we saw in 1959's sleeping beauty and it's an important fact to look through.

(9) Malleus is NOT Maleficent!

While they are a lot more similar than you can imagine(in both power and personality), let's not forget that Malleus is NOT Maleficent! He's a total new character on his own, and is unique in his own way.

He is twisted from Maleficent which means that no matter how similar they are, Malleus is a new character with a new personality.

Saying that he isn't soft at all and the fandom will see his true face when he overblots ( It's supposed to mean that the real Malleus is an absolutely evil and destructive one, just like Maleficent) is nothing different from denying all of Yana's hard work on designing him and his personality!

Malleus himself said that his grandmother's skills were far greater than his and most importantly: Malleus still has chance to have a better fate than Maleficent did.

Once again: He's still young! He still has a chance to be saved from turning into a heartless and isolated creature like Maleficent. No matter how cold he is, he hasn't yet got to the point of hating the whole world and losing all of his emotions. And that's why it's totally wrong to deny all the good that he might still have inside by saying that he isn't soft at all. He isn't a baby, but he isn't a monster either. Not yet.

(10) Even Lilia agrees that Malleus is still learning and his personality is in development

Can't you see? Malleus isn't attending to this school for no reason. His magic is already top notch, and his knowledge goes far greater than anything they might teach in NRC.

If you take a look at the story, you'll see signs of Lilia indirectly giving us signs of why Malleus still needed to attend to this school. In Malleus's SR robes' story, Lilia told him that he still has a lot to learn and knowledge isn't everything. And what might he find in NRC which has nothing to do with knowledge? People.

Lilia is trying to hold him back from isolating himself like Maleficent did, and is indeed trying to help him make friends and learn to get along with people without thinking that it's useless because they'd fear him anyway.

Also, he clearly wants Malleus to learn and experience new things in NRC by taking part in activities. In Malleus's Halloween SR story Lilia, who was always the one to choose Diasomnia's Halloween costumes, asks Malleus to choose this year's costume instead of him. Lilia first says that he wants Malleus to do it but later tells him that he has other reasons as well, he was trying to put Malleus into trying something new therefore he can have something learn from the experiment! (What a cute papa he really is...)

This is another proof of him not having the cold and unapproachable picture some imagine him to have, he isn't against experiencing and trying new things.

(11) He's still looking for a true friend

Malleus needs a friend, that's a fact. During his chats he mentions how Maleficent always had her loyal pet crow by her side as the only reliable creature she could always trust, and how Malleus wonders if he can ever find such a worthy ally of his own.

Even as he has Lilia, Silver and Sebek by his side he doesn't feel like he has such a friend.

People have been avoiding him through his whole life, and you can see how excited he got when Cater asked him for a selfie as he was one of the very first people who ever tried to approach him.

While he's slowly getting used to being feared by everyone, he'd still appreciate a friend and he needs one. Not even Maleficent herself could've made it all on her own without a friend by her side.

(12) Malleus isn't heartless

While he won't easily fall for anything or anyone, it isn't impossible for him to love.

We haven't yet seen anything that directly gets us to the point of love in the story but it's something you can tell through his actions and words.

When he cares for something or someone, he'd be serious about it.

Two obvious examples would be his tamagotchi and the ramshackle dorm. He'd certainly get out of his way to find someone to fix his dear tamagotchi and as we saw in the Halloween event, he furiously stated that he'd burn anyone who tries to the ramshackle dorm any harm, because he likes that place.

There isn't much he holds dear in life, but when he does, he won't let a single soul to take it away from him.

When he can be this protective over something that just entertains him, just try to imagine how far he might go to protect the one he loves. He falls in love very slowly and it'll probably take him a while to realize it if he actually does. He can begin with small interests and repeated meetings but at some point, it'll turn into a routine, an obsession. He won't easily fall in love, but when he does, he won't be able to easily let go of it either.

(13) His relationship with MC is far more important than you're thinking

Just by going through his voice lines, you can tell how MC is effecting Malleus's personality and life. I'm not saying that it's love or anything but the thing is, MC is changing Malleus nonetheless.

Their relationship has been a totally new thing for Malleus to experience from the very beginning, because MC didn't know him. Malleus is obviously used to being well-known as the infamous prince of the Draconia family by almost everyone, but MC was an exception.

He asked MC to talk to him and tell him stories, it can be clearly see that he enjoys talking to them.

He also mentioned that MC has made him feeling lots of things he hadn't felt before, which can also be connected to part (10) where we discussed how he's still young and needs more of communication and friends because he needs to learn.

Some argue that Malleus couldn't care less about MC and the only reason he shows up around them is because of the ramshackle dorm, which can be easily proven wrong by two hints:

1) Malleus sent a Happy holiday card to MC after the winter holiday.

2)What Malleus told Lilia at the end of the Halloween event stories after all the troubles that was brought upon the ramshackle dorm: "I want that human to enjoy Halloween too"

While it isn't necessarily romance that we're talking about, his relationship with MC is clearly telling us that he's a lot more of emotions and humanity inside him than what we were expecting.

At this point, it's important to see that in spite of his cold nature and mature personality he is slowly beginning to feel more and more emotions as the result of meeting newer people in NRC, especially MC. Saying that he is nothing but a heartless fae who is wrongly thought to be a soft and emotional boy is nothing different from judging him the same way as most of the people in twisted wonderland itself judge Malleus, it's important to see that he's a lot more.

His personality itself is surely amazing and as a Malleus hoe stan myself I can't wait to get more of his background in chapter 7, although it's probably going to be dark as well. They really did give his design a twist and that's how he's a balance of and menacingly powerful magician and a young boy who's just learning to deal with emotions.

For now, that's all I had in mind! Hope that I didn't miss anything. This was a general character analysis which also discussed some of the common mistakes about Malleus's personality but-

In case that you're wondering how he's being mischaracterized in reader insert fics, that'll be a totally different issue to discuss which would also need another post to be discussed through.

Small note: Just saying that there's often a dark lore to twst x reader fics (Especially for Malleus/ Leona x reader) which is usually better to be ignored while reading/writing for them...

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst theories #twisted wonderland theories #Twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader #Character analysis #answered

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inevitably-johnlocked · 2 years

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I’ve never done this before, and I’m wondering: how do you get your fic on a rec list? Not, like, yours specifically, just in general. Are there tags in general, or is it a matter of it getting popular enough?

Here are the fics I am trying to get recced:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37946308 https://archiveofourown.org/works/34682623

Hey Lovely!

First, your fics:

Set Fire To A Daydream by Biana_Amberly_Vacker (T, 1,208 w., 1 Ch. || Established Relationship, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Angst with Happy Ending) – Can you set fire to a daydream?When Sherlock’s mind palace melts to the ground, can he find his John in time, or will it be too late?

Gone Before Your Time by Biana_Amberly_Vacker (T, 12,779 w., 11 Ch. || Supernatural Elements AU || Post-TRF Diversion, Major Character Deaths / Suicides, Afterlife, Love Confessions, Flashbacks, Adventure, Angry John, Moriarty is Dead, Fighting) – AU where Sherlock dies when he jumps and John commits suicide. They both end up in the Gone Before Your Time Department, where people who die before their scheduled death end up. They meet each other there and have to make a plan to make sure that Moriarty, who is also in the Department, goes to hell (quite literally). But it’s not as straightforward as anyone would like. There are lies, plans within plans, and people from the past that Sherlock and John would both rather forget. There will be ten chapters and an epilogue. Tags will be added as the story progresses. Please leave a comment! (Major Character Death is for first chapter only)

-----

Secondly, I can't speak for other people, but for me, my lists themselves either do like I'm doing now and boost the fics with the single post and then add the fics to the "Signal Boosting" section of the following Five Fics Friday post; or the fic gets suggested to me on another post and when I make an MFLs list and the tag was added in the Tags (which is why I always say tags are SO important!), I add them to those lists; OR I've personally read and bookmarked a fic, and after bookmarking I file it onto the various offline lists I have (currently at about 200 if I exclude the ones I need to separate the fics better).

AND because my blog is known for the interactivity and my meticulous pulling of comment threads onto main posts, a lot of recs are just added it to the reblogs or replies of a fic rec list if it's one of mine currently on a reblog cycle; if I see it, I add it eventually, LOL.

The best way to get your stuff known is to promote the poop out of it. Some newer authors feel like a bother if they promote more than once. Truth is though, ya gotta get yourself out there! A lot of people on Tumblr use the lists we make rather than filing through the hundreds of new fics uploaded weekly! It's overwhelming, and a lot of people follow fic-rec blogs like mine for the simple fact that it's a one-stop easier-to-digest place to come to find new and old favourites!

AND YOU DID! This is a great first start, and don't be afraid to go to other fic reccers and ask if they can boost your fics with an ask just like this (but more "hey, I wrote a new fic, can you boost it for me?)! And if they don't, no harm done, it's nothing personal! But I know a lot of my followers do come to my blog for the regular boosts of new fics and authors, and of course my lists of fics I've personally read (unless otherwise noted on the post). It's just as simple as that, really.

Anyway, if you're interested in some more of my thoughts about helping authors get noticed, check out these posts:

My Writing Advice for Focusing on the Work (Goals)

Any Tips to get people to notice your writing?

How Do I Get My Fics to a Wider Audience?

Will Anyone Ever See My Fics?

Should I Continue Writing or Delete my Stories?

I Want To Write a Story… What If Someone Already Wrote it?

Any advice for new authors? (With a big bunch of advice from JBaillier)

How do people remain productive? (Long community discussion with commentary from jbaillier)

I want to start writing fan fiction. What Should I do?

Should I bother writing fics? There’s so many

I hate writing summaries for fics. Advice?

Hopefully those will help answer any lingering questions for anyone reading this :)

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #signal boost #writing advice #my advice #my blog #chatting with nonnies

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gar-trek · 3 years

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I review killing time (or whatever)

Okay, yes this review has taken me forever and that’s because there’s so much I want to say, and most of it has very little to do with the plot of the book. I cut down a lot of this so you guys could just get to the main point of what I’m trying to say, so I apologize if this is a little brief or incomprehensible to those who haven’t read the book.

And also, before I get into it, I would like to say rest in peace to the author Della Van Hise, who passed away in march of this year. She contributed a lot to the fandom, especially in regards to K/S fiction, as well as publishing a lot of non-trek related work during her life.

First of all, if you have heard of Killing Time, there is probably one specific reason for that. It’s the same reason I picked up the book in the first place and why it’s really even a topic of discussion on this site. To put the story quite briefly, Killing Time was recalled during its initial release on account of the book having too many slash elements (aka, the relationship between Kirk and Spock could be read as sexual/romantic). I first heard about the book here in this post where the history of it is worded to sound like one very dramatic mystery. One user (no shade intended here) even goes as far as to say the book was recalled by old Gene himself! Now I’m always one for drama and such, but after reading the book I looked into it a little more, and I don’t think that’s exactly how it went down.

Here you can find multiple statements from the author herself, in which she tells the whole story. According to her, the book publisher accidentally released an unedited manuscript that was never supposed to make it to the public. So technically the publisher did not recall the book because it was “too gay”, they recalled it because they printed a version that was never meant for the public to see anyway. These were the edits that were specifically requested by Paramount, who the publishers were supposed to go through to get the final okay on all material. And like, yeah, all of Paramounts edits were pretty much to delete any sentence where Spock and Kirk are tender to each other, they were trying to make is less homoerotic, obviously. I understand why this slight distinction may not make much of a difference to you guys, but for me it’s important to note that the book wasn’t recalled because it was too gay, it was just never supposed to be gay in the first place. It doesn’t make that fact any better, but it does make it less dramatic, in my opinion. I encourage you to read the statements from the author on this topic though, because she gives the whole story a lot better then I just did.

Now to address the main question at hand, does Killing Time depict a romantic relationship between Kirk and Spock, or is it all just hype? (in layman's terms, is the book gay or not?) and to answer quite plainly, yes it’s gay. of course it is. but then to answer less plainly, no. What the fuck do i mean by this? well let me try and explain.

I read the second edition of the book, aka the censored version, but I also followed along with the first edition (using this great article). The changes made to the book did not effect the plot at all, and were really only minor things. Notably, in the second edition they just kind of left out any part where Spock and Kirk touch each other (and I don’t mean in a sexual way). For example, there is a scene where Spock and Kirk are having a serious conversation in the ships garden. In the first edition, at the end of the conversation Spock places a hand on Kirks shoulder, which Kirk covers with his own hand. In the second addition, all mentions of this simple contact are deleted. The differences between the two are mostly little things like this. There is no secret sex scene or love confession hidden in the first addition. You see, in my opinion, the changes made to the second edition of the book do very little to censor the romantic undertones between Kirk and Spock. That’s because they are ingrained in the plot line itself.

One very important aspect to this book is that Kirk and Spock share a mental bond. This is something that can only happen between a Vulcan and another when they are extremely close. The mental bond that Kirk and Spock share is so strong in this book, it’s even present when they enter an alternate dimension where they are strangers to one another. There is a romance in this book between two original characters, and their relationship is constantly being paralleled by that of Kirk and Spock. And, maybe most telling, Spock refuses a female Romulan who is very interested in him over and over again simply because Kirk exists. And no, that’s not an exaggeration, here is a line from when the Romulan woman was begging Spock to be in a relationship with her:

“I need you. The Empire needs you, what more can there be?”

“James Kirk” the Vulcan murmured without hesitation.

That line is in both versions of the book. What I’m trying to say is yes, there are K/S elements in Killing Time. There are many tender moments and lots of talk about Kirk and Spock’s devotion to each other.

So now you’re asking yourself, Gar, why did you just say earlier that “no, the book is not gay”? Well, that’s because it’s not. This isn’t a K/S book. This isn’t a piece of Spirk fanfiction. Because for as much as this book is about Kirk and Spock’s relationship, it’s even more about Romulans (and more specifically, that one girlboss Romulan Commander from the Enterprise Incident.... bet ya didn't see that coming!) That’s right, the most controversial Star Trek book ever published is at it’s core quite plainly just a Star Trek book. There is weird alternate dimensions, time travel, espionage and lots and lots of Romulans!

Alright, alright, what I’m really trying to get at here is that yes, if you read into Killing Time there is K/S elements. I mean for god sake the author was a known K/S fanfic writer, that wasn’t a secret by any means. If she wrote their relationship a little more tenderly than most authors would have, can we really be surprised? But writing a K/S story was not her intention here, and that’s not what this is. I think the author put it best herself, so I’m just going to put that here:

“If people chose to see overtones of K/S in it, maybe it’s because there were overtones of K/S throughout Star Trek itself.”

People will hype up killing time as some secret confirmation that K/S is real and canon, and I really get that. Like, it would be really nice to have some canon acknowledgment of K/S, and I really don’t blame people for acting like that’s what this is. But that really isn’t what this is. And even if there was some kind of love confession, I really hate to break it to you, but the Star Trek novels are just fancy fanfiction and are not considered canon by any stretch (excluding the one Gene wrote himself, which let’s face it, perhaps has the most K/S elements of all).

If you are looking for a nice story about Kirk and Spock being in love, then I very much urge you to look at Ao3 or similar sites. Skip this, if you want a K/S story, because that’s not what this is. Now, if you’re a huge fan of the Romulan commander from the Enterprise Incident, then my GOD you have to read this. I think this was a pretty solid Trek book. It was no piece of literary genius, but it got the job done. There was a lot of it that I think could have been left out, because it the later half it started to drag horribly, and we got a few plot threads that went absolutely nowhere. I’m not sure I’m much of a fan of alternate universes, as I really really enjoy the established dynamic of the characters, but it didn’t bother me too much. But I mean hey man, there was defiantly parts where I was so invested I couldn’t put the book down. Give this one a read if you’re looking for a pretty interesting Trek book with a little bit of cheeky K/S sprinkled here and there.

If you have given the book a read, or just have thoughts in general, I’d love to hear them!

#here it is people #as always sorry for any grammer or spelling mistakes #i know there are prone to be some so just uhhhhh #ignore it if you can #star trek #killing time #kirk #james t kirk #spock #kirk/spock #k/s #spirk #the original series

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bored-storyteller · 3 years

Note

uh I love your storys about Uta ^^. You write him so good and in character . Could you maybe write a story about him were him and the reader ( human) meeting at an auction like reader was captured and meets Uta there . But maybe they escape the auction house and meet Uta sometime after this again. I`m sorry I love Uta angst and fluff .

Dear anon. I'll tell you, your request inspired me a lot (that's why I did it right away), but I must confess that I'm not really satisfied with the result and I'm sorry (I rewrote it three times). I have to thank my poor summary skills for this defeat, I don't think I managed to really give you what you asked me. Feel free to send me clarifications or a further request for me to remedy!

43- Tokyo Ghoul, Uta x human!reader

“The bird of ill omen and the broken toy”

You are in front of his eyes, huddled in a corner of the cold and dark container. On your knees, tied up, you are the condemned to death ready to face the gallows, or rather you are a delicious dish wrapped in its most beautiful dress to entice the spectators.

"Oh, look here ... what a delightful creature."

You are not the main article, you are not the rare object, yet your smell has brought him there. Uta is not a glutton, but he couldn't resist the temptation to peek at whoever was carrying such an inviting fragrance.

"This is really a shame ..." his voice is sweet, calm, yet ironic and cruel. Yes, it's a shame that he has to give you to some miserly ghoul.

Uta doesn’t usually prefer a certain type of food, he is not delicate or picky, nor does he have problems eating even his similar ones. But he has to admit that while those bright eyes of yours, shining with tears and desperation, look at him, he really would like to be able to eat them. Yes, it is rare for someone to stimulate his appetite in this way, customers really have to thank him for his self-control.

You are so small in his shadow, and even if you tremble, even if you smell of fear, he sees no hope in your eyes.

You know you have no escape. As little as you may be when it comes to ghouls, you know you can't save yourself. You heard them talk.

You would rather die now than continue that torture.

He feels it, and oh, how tempted he is to grant your wish.

He leans over you, he wants to see you well, he wants to hear you. The demonic beak of his mask brushes against you, rubs against your temple like the muzzle of a mother cuddling his cub, or the muzzle of a lion that is playing with his prey.

Maybe, if he had met you in another situation ... maybe ...

No. He doesn't necessarily have to devour you. Nothing is ever said with Uta, even he knows it, he knows himself. Who knows what would have happened if you had met somewhere else. Who knows who you were, elsewhere.

In conclusion, you were both unlucky: you cannot survive, and he cannot be the one to eat you. You have something in common.

"Uta!"

Roma's voice makes its way, muffled by the metal container in which you are locked up - like a ready meal -

"I'm coming!" It's time for him to go on stage, for you it's time for the final bow.

He doesn't tell you anything anymore, he doesn't need to. He will say goodbye to you that same evening, but he feels a little happy that you are among the last items to be exhibited.

He still gives you a look, you, little shaking puppet, sweet broken toy. Who can fix you anymore?

After that, he leaves you behind, abandoned in the cold darkness of your last hours in solitude, as he plunges into the cold light of demons, ready to entertain his fellow men with his affable ways. What a crazy world you are both in.

. . .

Locked in your cold prison, if you could you would cover your ears in a desperate attempt to get away from the announcements and screams, but it's impossible for you. So you wait, trembling in your shell of panic, not knowing what to do. If only you had at least a vain hope, a false chance. If only you could save yourself, for some reason, any reason then yeah, oh, how dear life would be to you thereafter. But you can't even think now.

And you don't even realize that the noises change. The cries of the victims become the cries of the executioners, and the applause becomes breathless footsteps in search of a safe place. But you don't know it, or at least not until they get closer, more distressed. They are probably running away. But who can save you? Who knows you are there? Who can remember you?

And in fact, no one stops, no one frees you, and the footsteps and the screams brush against you and pass you, without bothering to kill or save you. At least you think so.

But as soon as the silence comes, the creaking of the doors opening makes you lift your face, towards the light.

He is there again, and you wonder if that Bird of ill Omen is not your hallucination. With that bizarre suit, that hateful mask, and those ancient letters around his neck that seem ready to strangle him.

He doesn't talk to you. He is simply looking at you, you feel him looking at you, behind that deadly beak. In the silence that surrounds you, whether it is a real silence or created by mutual presence, he suddenly occupies your every thought in those few seconds of eternity. Maybe it's the touch of death that wanders your mind, but suddenly unusual questions arise in you. Who knows who he is, what he does. What does he like and what not ... does he live in the alleys of the city, or maybe, instead, without that mask he pretends to be someone?

He came to take you and devour you. But it almost seems like a strange barrier is keeping him away from you.

And while you are suspended in this limbo of cold resignation, as he came he disappears, and with his disappearance he takes away from you that sad calm that had enveloped you.

The panic returns as someone approaches.

Don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Clean eyes, a clean face, no mask is looking at you agitated. You don't know how to answer, you don't even know if what you are seeing is true.

“I'm a human, I'm a CCG investigator. Don't worry, it's okay, we'll get you out of here. "

Without your being fully aware of it, you find yourself in warm, safe arms that take you away from hell behind you. You didn't even realize you were crying.

. . .

He recognized your smell right away.

Even if it's been some time since his meeting with you, it's hard to forget something that has affected him so much, especially if it is something that has particularly touched his sensitivity over that of others.

And it's not that Uta is then easily surprised, he is ready to expect anything from that crazy world, yet you manage to upset him without even knowing that he is there.

You are smiling. And that's not the fact, but at the same time it is. You are smiling sweetly, sincerely. Your eyes are clear and bright, and you are listening to someone talking to you about their petty problems without batting an eye.

That night, that night he met you, he came back to eat you. He was not a ghoul who got lost in gluttony, but given the situation he had a particular interest in the statement "carpe diem".

He hadn't, in the end. In the end he just looked at you. It would have been easy to swallow you, but he had left you there. He had told himself that he hadn't made it in time, but who knows what was really going through his head at that moment.

It doesn't matter anymore, however. What's a broken toy like you doing so quietly exposed? How can you smile at people like that, when surely the world around you has crumbled into millions of little bits?

You make him angry, you know? Humans like you, whom the world keeps getting back on their feet despite everything, provoke anger in him.

And you are there, a few steps away from him, and you do not realize that the one who had the task of trampling your life is watching you.

And no matter how much anger he may feel inside of him, he can't help but look at you, as you speak comfortable words to someone, while you give your attention as if you have no problem.

"Uta?" Renji's voice, intent on looking at him from behind the coffee shop counter, makes him look away from you.

"Nh? Ah… ”His gaze falls on his now coffee-stained lap. The stain is almost invisible on the black sweater, but it is damp and warm.

"Don't laugh ... can you give me a towel please?"

"I'm not laughing." Yet Uta could swear that in the serious voice of his trusted friend a note of amusement is audible even to those who do not know him.

Carefully he puts the cup back on the saucer, making sure not to do any further damage.

This then. When was he ever so distracted for a human?

But when he instinctively looks for you, after all that nice little theater, you're not there anymore. The table you occupied is empty.

Only one object remained abandoned on the shiny surface. A book lies alone, the bookmark sticking out in the middle.

It is placed on the side where you sat. Did you leave in such a hurry that you left it there?

It is not that he has a real reason to do it, yet, while he is about to leave :Re, with all the tranquility that characterizes him, he picks up that literary volume in his hands, hiding it inside his jacket. Even that printed paper is imbued with your smell by now.

. . .

You talk to books, apparently. The edges of the pages are filled with thoughts written in pencil. They are all yours, it almost seems like you use the books as your diary, but there is nothing so personal about you. They are just… points of view. The world told by you, depending on the inspiration that the phrases in the book give you.

"It must be difficult to live in a world where you can talk to your food about your favorite book."

When Uta's eyes had settled on that particular phrase, he had closed. For someone else it might have been a stupid phrase, probably, but for him it was like a punch in the stomach.

He doesn't know if you wrote it before or after the accident, but in any case that simple sentence arouses a mixture of emotions that he doesn't really know where to place. Even if you wanted to, you couldn't understand what it meant to be a ghoul in that world, but on the other hand, the utopia in which Renji seems so hoping could be made up of people like you. If only he believed it, Uta could like that world, as long as there was a place in that world for someone like him.

“Excuse me, did you happen to find a book yesterday? I'm afraid I left it here by mistake. " Your cordial voice betrays a note of alarmism as you speak to the young girl. Your hands grip the counter as if it were a rock of salvation, but your feet are ready to run elsewhere, to look somewhere else in case it isn't there.

"Oh ... no, I'm sorry, I haven't seen any books." Touka's voice is sorry, an apologetic tone hovers between her words.

"Oh, damn ... sorry, thanks anyway!" Your words are so hasty, so quick that he doesn't have time to interrupt them.

The bell rings and the door closes with a click.

"You have it, don't you?" Renji never misses anything - or almost -.

"Yeah, it’s better that I give it back to them before they run all over Tokyo on foot."

"How long have you been so thoughtful?"

Uta allows himself to take a last look at the silver-haired ghoul from over his sunglasses, as he prepares to leave the cafe: "I'm always thoughtful."

. . .

The snow has just started to fall. It is light and silent, the parks of the metropolis have not yet begun to turn white.

You would gladly stay and watch the show from the heat of your home, if it weren't for that damn book you forgot somewhere. Oh, you love your books, but they're so good at hiding. You were convinced you left it in the coffee shop!

"Excuse me…"

A cordial voice caresses your eardrums. It's so warm and peaceful, yet a chill shiver stops the blood in your veins.

Turning around, you meet a man dressed in black. He is strange, but it doesn't surprise you, there are a lot of strange people in such a big city, even people who wear sunglasses on a snowy day.

You had already seen him in the cafe, but you didn't dwell on him. Not because he doesn't get your attention, just… it was an instinct.

“I think you were looking for this. I found it yesterday by chance. "

Clear and tapered fingers hand you your much-desired book. On fair skin, intertwining dark patterns form inexplicable designs, at least for you, but you're sure they have a lot to say, don't they?

Slowly you reach out your hand, and hesitantly touch the cover, to resume what you were looking for.

The night of the accident did not disappear. You are scared. You are afraid of death, but even more of pain, of imprisonment. You are afraid of fear itself. However, you are also afraid of not living, of wasting, of losing.

You are in a limbo that does not let you escape, and you can not help but continue your life, savoring every second, waiting for the Bird of ill Omen to come and get you.

So you push back the mistrust again, and a grateful and kind smile goes to the one who helped you, without asking for explanations.

"Thank you very much." Your voice reaches his pierced ears with such unexpected sweetness.

"It was a pleasure." His smile, decorated with the piercing, is barely hinted at, but delicate - reassuring? -

And for endless moments you look at each other, in silence, without speaking and without thinking. And then, as if nothing had happened, the dances between prey and predator begin.

"Can I buy you a coffee?"

. . .

Your eyes look at him shiny, frightened. You are still in a cage, imprisoned by a body that will soon be ready to consume you.

Uta wonders if you really never anticipated this. All the times you've crossed paths, have you really ever been in doubt? Every time you looked at him, every time you smiled at him or laughed at his words, did you never guess the truth? No, maybe you've always known it from the start, broken toys never work too well.

The mask of that evening, like a macabre mockery - both for him and for you - is leaning on the work table, not far from you, looking at you placidly. It’s a coincidence that he pulled it out just in the morning.

Suddenly the images of that day come back between you two, like a dream. The incomprehensible to you tattoo on his neck has a creepy look overwhelmed by the shadows that the soft lights create on the ghoul.

Fear invades you, like a script. Yet, while the Bird of ill Omen looms over you, trapping you in the corner of the room with his arms, your terror is different from what he had already seen in you. Today it is almost more visible, less controlled, as you tremble beneath him.

Maybe it's the surprise of being caught in a trap by someone who – perhaps- you had slowly begun to love – despite everything-, or maybe, simply, inside you a little hope still survives.

Uta's head bends, and the tip of his nose brushes your neck, smelling the coveted perfume that had so attracted him.

If you're so scared, how did you smile all that time? How did you keep going? How did you keep loving that world?

Beside his mask, as a warning of future torment, your dear book lies silent, ready to say goodbye. You lent it to him last time, he asked you for it.

Your smell is as strong, sweet, delicious as ever - so why is his stomach closing up? -

His jaws open, and as delicate as cruel they enclose your fragile neck. In them, the accelerated beats of your heart, still alive, make him tremble.

One bite and you will be nothing but dead flesh, and he hesitates.

He had to kill you before it was too late, right? Uta should know himself well enough, he had to understand right away what was happening inside him.

A sigh, and then his lips pull away, his saliva stops wetting you. He is not hungry, he has already eaten.

He is still upon you, but now he is only looking at you, with his eyes of blood and darkness. You, like a frightened puppy, remain shaking in a corner for a few moments, lost in his pupils. And then, like a crazy lightning bolt, you run away, as you have always run away. You slip under his arms, and as fast as you can you reach the door of the shop.

Uta watches you go, swallows bitter air, and then bows his head, surrendered.

What will happen now? Will you shut up in fear? Will you tell anyone? Only time will tell.

He slowly gets up, his hands caressing each other's tattooed arms, in a distracted gesture of protection, as he approaches the table. His fingers touch it, and then squeeze it, while he looks at the book that is left alone again, without your eyes on it.

And then, suddenly, as if he had woken up from a dream, he notices something: your smell has not vanished.

Turning his view, he sees you. You are still there, or maybe you are back there.

Now it is you who are on the side of the light, and he is in the corner of the cage. The Bird of ill Omen has become the broken toy, left alone among his masks.

"What's up?" No matter the crack inside, Uta always looks so mature, peaceful, even after he has threatened to kill you.

You take a step towards him, but your outstretched arm continues to secure yourself to the door jamb. If you left he wouldn't follow you, you know that right?

"I ... I think I'm crazy, Uta ..." You too realize how much your behavior is against logic, how foolish it is to remain - to search - in your nightmare. But on the other hand, humans ... no, people, when they are desperate, lose the light of reason, and do wrong things. Things the world says are wrong. That world, which claims to be the only one, when it is nothing more than a facade, a corner of something much larger.

"Yes, I think so too." He really thinks so. You have to be crazy to still be there, at least as crazy as he is. "Why are you still here?"

You shrug your shoulders, hugging yourself more out of shyness than out of fear - yeah, you're no longer afraid, it's as if you've run out of batteries.

"I ... as long as I'm alive I can choose, right?" It came out of your lips so naturally that you didn't even realize it was you who uttered that sentence, yet it's a truth so deep, so intense that it has guided you from that damn night to this day.

"And what are you choosing?"

Your eyes cast a fleeting glance outside, at the glimmer of the city, and without hesitation you gently accompany the door to close, imprisoning you. Imprisoning both of you.

Maybe it's a prison, but this time it's really your choice. You are with that Bird of ill Omen, but you are not tied up, you are not thrown to the ground in a cold corner. You are with him, surrounded by works of art that stare at you impassively, but it was you who decided it.

"I choose not to ignore anymore ..." Your fingers intertwine with each other, you play with them as if you need to keep them busy as you approach him. He is waiting for you. "I want to understand."

"How can you understand?" He would like to tell you, but he doesn't say a word, because not even he can understand you. What kind of mask would suit you? Who knows, yet he has learned enough about you that he should be able to think of at least one. But no, you are always there, hoping for something, believing that after all, living is worthwhile.

So he stays there, even when you lean against him. Not a contact, but a fusion. Stomach against stomach, lungs against lungs, heart against heart. Your hands cling to his arms only to hold him closer, and as he looks at your closed eyes he knows you're listening to him. You're trying to feel his every breath, every twitch of him. You want to get inside him, and he lets you do it - isn't that what he wanted too?

The predator and the prey united in a single entity for an eternal instant.

It's all so against the moral and social rules, but what do you care now? You already know he could kill you. And in that world that goes round and round without stopping, a black writing in an ancient language that also goes around a greedy neck could be your starting point for putting the pieces back together. Maybe it's a disease, maybe it's madness, but deep down, why not? Why not go a little further? Better to die than to be afraid to live, right?

"How much confidence ..."

His voice further softened by his whisper makes your previously closed eyelids lift. His nocturnal eyes look at you slightly narrowed, a slight upward crease caresses his lips without even knowing it. It is difficult for Uta to do something without being aware of it.

He is very beautiful. Beautiful and awful.

"Can't I?"

The world out there, the crazy little world is gone.

"Well, why not ... you are my food, after all."

#tokyo ghoul #uta tokyo ghoul #uta x human reader #uta x reader #tokyo ghoul uta #tokyo ghoul oneshot #tokyo ghoul fanfiction #tokyo ghoul x reader #reqest

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sorcerersofnyc · 3 years

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The Last Thing Left (Zemo x F!Reader) 1/9

Ghosts weren’t enough to hold two people together.

While they wait for Torres to locate Donya Madani, Zemo reflects upon his relationship to you, his only tether to his wife and closest friend.

Slow burn, previous relationships, angst, various mentions of death & mourning. You both lost your spouse. You're a regular civilian person. Zemo's wife's name is Heike because of comics.

Note: Main Character is neutral in most regards but the story was written with my own cultural background in mind. (In other words, I won't say what she looks like but I envision her as being black.)

I meant to write a one-shot but, as it turns out, I have feelings for this man.

I'll have part two by the end of the day and hope to update steadily.

***

He looks forward to coming face-to-face with Karli, the girl responsible for the birth of a new faction of Super Soldiers. His plan for her was simple really: He would find her, and then he would end her—just as he did Nagel.

Sam and James lack the conviction to do what needs to be done, and it’s that weakness that makes Helmut invaluable (that and he’s the one with the private jet.) So he bides his time and waits.

Helmut would put an end to Karli and her acolytes. He would make sure of it.

But it’s night now, and he’s tired, so instead of plotting, he prepares a meal in the little kitchen near the cockpit.

James relaxes on the couch and Sam sits across from him in the lounge area, discussing something not meant for his ears. So as he does his work and delicious aromas permeate the air, Helmut decides to let their food cook a little longer than he usually would. By the time he decides to turn off the heat, Sam is contacting an associate—someone he hopes can help them locate Karli’s mentor, Donya Madani.

It isn’t a bad plan, enlisting the help of others, but Helmut knows how strenuous locating displaced persons can be; locating the dead was a much easier feat.

Sam’s associate wouldn’t find Donya as long as she’s alive.

“Now what?” James asks, his voice and disposition bitter as Helmut hands him the plate. He eyes the meal with suspicion.

“We wait” Sam can barely withhold his frustration with James, but he accepts the food with a nod.

“For how long?”

“For as long as it takes.”

Helmut has no burning desire to listen to Sam and James argue on and on about symbols and shields. It’s clear whatever they have between them is fraying—ripping at the seams.

If it wasn’t so painfully ironic (and hilarious to watch,) Helmut would find the relationship between Sam and James a little sad.

Ghosts weren’t enough to hold two people together.

“I know of a place we can go until then.” He says, settling down into his chair. Helmut doesn’t give them a moment to ask questions, instead, he asks Oeznik to adjust their course towards Spain.

He’d know exactly where to port.

And though the journey would be long and annoying, he would handle it as handled every arduous thing: with patience and a glass of whiskey.

Besides, his impending headache will be well worth it; he’ll get to see you again.

***

Before she was his wife, Heike was his girlfriend, and in those days, she longed to see the world outside the trappings of nobility. So she studied abroad for University and adventured out into the world. But despite her dazzling personality, she never expected to have met a friend so quickly. (She confessed as much to him the day after she arrived.)

So when she ran into you—quite literally—while searching for her class building, she was overjoyed. You were headed to the same lecture (as Heike would recount later,) and decided to share a bench as you looked over a ridiculously simplified map.

Heike couldn’t wait to tell him of the ‘lovely Fine Arts major’ she met that day (and every day afterward.)

You were all but joined at the hip ever since; you were there for all their important dates — their engagement, their wedding, the birth of their baby.

But despite your somewhat frequent presence in his home and in his life, Helmut never thought to consider you a friend, not really.

You were his wife’s friend, someone who came to town, swept her up, spoiled Carl, and left days later.

But when Heike hosted dinner for one of her milestone birthdays, your life became entangled with his further. Because on that day, you caught the eye of his closest friend, Dominik.

Dominik had no title. His family had been nobility once, many years ago, but their words no longer held sway in politics or court.

So society wouldn’t care if Dominik married a Sokovian woman or if his partner came from old money. There would be looks, of course, and there would be whispers, (Sokovia was a fairly homogenous society, after all, and with that came many old-world sensibilities,) but most were content to let him be.

Dominik was free to live his life with impunity.

So he might have married anyone he liked—in fact, he might have had an easier time courting a woman more easily swayed by his charm and vast amounts of money—but you enchanted him from the beginning, he didn’t want anyone else.

“They would make such a cute couple, wouldn’t they?” Heike asked that evening, her large eyes filled with mischievous glee. They both had the misfortune of watching Dominik flounder as he spoke to you and Helmut often wondered if she set you up on purpose if she somehow knew that love would run its course.

Helmut remembered one particular day; it was hot and he found his friend tucked away in the stuffy library of his family’s estate. He looked studious, thoughtful, things he rarely expected Dominik to be.

The annotated books were arranged in neat piles, obscuring Dominik’s tired eyes.

“What are these?” Helmut asked him, inspecting the pile with curiosity.

He said your name with a sight, almost dreamily.

“She said she likes to read, so I asked about her favorites,” he told him, gesturing “She told me these were ‘essential reading.’ ”

He was never meant to read them all at once, but he was determined to impress you.

Endlessly curious and amused, Helmut decided to read them too. (He found the one on Pre-Columbian art extremely insightful, as was the one on the political importance of diasporas, and of course the one on Marvin Gaye.)

But it wasn’t until a year later, when EKO Scorpion was deployed, that he realized the true depth of Dominik’s feelings for you.

Because usually, when Dominik received one of your amorous letters, he would grin and gloat and parade himself through camp.

“Look,” he would say, waving the envelope around as if it were your banner, “I have someone waiting for me.”

But then one night, after a back-breaking mission near the border of Lithuania, Helmut watched his friend pull your letter from the pocket of his uniform. The night was damp and cold, but he read the letter quietly, thumbing at the wrinkled page.

And he was happy for him, he was happy for you.

It was nice, Helmut remembered, watching your courtship from afar and offering advice where he could.

He was proud to stand beside Dominik on the day of the wedding, proud to watch see your love take root.

Though it took a great deal of compromise for you to move to Sokovia (you didn’t like the idea of living in a country so bloodied by war, you were worried about exclusion and monotony, and you found the film culture’s lacking,) but once you did, he and Heike entertained you on the holidays.

There had been no children between you and him, but there was plenty of love.

There was so much love, in fact, someone found your letter in the pocket of his uniform the day they pulled him from the rubble of Novi Grad.

“Does anyone know where his wife is?” An officer asked.

“Does anyone know where anyone is?” Another replied.

It was an endless cycle of death and sorrow as people dug soldiers and civilians from the wreckage and debris.

Some were alive, most were dead.

People cried.

Families broke apart.

People begged and fell limp in the streets.

Helmut buried his entire family.

You buried your husband and his father.

You had no one left.

You made a beautiful speech at the service, one that spoke volumes of love you both shared.

“I loved him,” you said, “and he loved me.”

But when the service was finally over and you stood at the site of his freshly dug grave, you lingered almost absentmindedly, at a loss for something to say.

Helmut joined you, after a while, standing in silent solidarity. You’d done the same just a few days prior. He waited for you to speak.

You keep your eyes cast down as you do.

“I’m standing here and I... I still can’t believe it. I can’t believe they’re gone.”

All because of the Avengers, he thought. They took everything from you both.

“What will I do without him?” When you looked at him, your eyes filled with tears, Helmut knew better than to say what he was thinking. He couldn’t tell you he longed to watch the world burn, that he wanted those so-called ‘heroes’ to have died in the place of those he held dear, that he wanted revenge.

So he said the next best thing instead:

“I’ll take care of you,” he promised.

“Thank you, Helmut. But… I…” You wanted to tell him you’d be alright, but the lie lodged itself in the back of your throat and a sob pushed forward instead.

“Please…” He beckoned softly, “It’s what they would have wanted. Heike and Carl… they adored you. I can do this much at least.“

You were the only thing he had left of the ones he loved.

He didn’t want to let you go.

***

Thanks for reading! Look out for part two! The reader will have more interaction with Zemo.

#baron zemo #helmut zemo #zemo #zemo x reader #well that was pretty nerve-wracking #its been so long since I wrote a fic lmao #i never wrote for the mcu but for some reason zemo just...does it for me #he’s so interesting

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angeli-marco-writes · 4 years

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Ann’s Old Masterlist

UNUSED AS OF JULY 2021 - Current masterlist here

Rules for my page. PSA.

All works are original and legally my own. Do not repost. More works coming soon: each Saturday currently, schedule will change.

Please read the warnings at the top of every post: Items marked 18+ are mature/smut, and I don’t recommend you read if you are under eighteen, but it’s up to you to mediate your media consumption. The warnings you heed are entirely your responsibility.

Disclaimer: I do not know any of the people I write about, nor do I claim to, and I simply write about fictional figments of them. The fictional worlds I write within (the MCU, Harry Potter etc.) I do not own either, I do not own the characters or the settings, but merely write about a further fictional figment.

I currently only write Fem!reader. Works marked Ღ are the most popular. My inbox is open to requests but they may take a while to get a response.

Ann's TS 200 blurb event! (Mini Masterlist)

Regulus Black

Romeo, Juliet & Quidditch

Summary: One very eventful Quidditch final can do more than Regulus and his Juliet ever imagined; strengthening family ties, Y/N's mind, and Reg's feelings all at once.

Charlie Weasley

Secret. (18+)

Summary: You have a secret regarding the dragon taming Weasley. The only issue is that he sees you as the child you were a few years ago. When you become legal, he seems to seek you out wherever you are. Maybe he has a secret too.

Couple Blurbs

Lily & James Potter - First Kiss.

Summary: When Lily sees a new side of James, she thinks maybe falling for him isn’t so bad after all.

Albus & Scorpius - Before You Go.

Summary: At the 5th year prom, Albus and Scorpius find they can’t hold back their feelings anymore. Just one dance, before you go

Bill & Fleur - Our Spot.

Summary: After the final task, Fleur finds herself in despair, and goes to the only spot she can think of to unwind, not expecting to be approached by a handsome stranger.

Dean & Seamus - At Last.

Summary: Years of tiptoeing around one another and hidden feelings come to a head when Seamus finds a stack of art beneath Dean's bed. At last, something might happen.

Doctor Stephen Strange

ᲦBaby Blues & Tattoos (18+)

Summary: After a tiring mission, the last thing you want to do is have to crash at a hotel, especially with the cockiest man alive. Will things change with the fact there's only one bed on such a sleepless night?

Loki Laufeyson

ᲦDress.

Summary: This dance between you and Loki has been going on for far too long. The night of the palace ball gives you the chance to make your next move, wearing the dress you bought only for him to take it off.

Peter Parker, Spider-Man

Everything Happens for a Reason.

Summary: Stark!Reader x Peter Parker, post endgame. Months after the death of your father, your aunt, and your uncle, you find yourself in a sticky situation, and to make it even worse, your childhood crush doesn’t even recognise you now. Then again, doing most of your growing up while half of the population is dead doesn’t exactly bode well for your love life nor your commitment issues. When things finally start to turn around while learning to live with a disability, will you still be taken away to live with your step mother, or will love pan out at last? After all, everything happens for a reason.

Steve Rogers, Captain America

Promise? (18+)

Summary: Being an apprentice at the Avengers Tower is never easy, especially not when you make a promise to your favourite person there and fail to keep it, through no fault of your own. In a matter of seconds, your world comes crumbling around, but Steve seems to come around in order to pick up the pieces.

Clint Barton, Hawkeye

Rough. (18+)

Summary: After the snap, you never think you’ll see Clint again. Hanging around the tower alone day in and day out becomes tiring, especially when your hormones are in overdrive and you can’t stop thinking about the one avenger you haven’t yet had in bed, until he walks through the door more attractive than ever. (Seriously read the warnings for this, it’s very kinky).

Tom Hiddleston

Ღ BAFTAs.

Summary: Tom thieves your panties after you rile him up the night of the BAFTAs, and he doesn't anticipate the consequences of keeping underwear in his pocket on the red carpet. (Definitely mature with heavy implications, but no explicit smut)

Ღ Stripped Sunday

Summary: Sunday's are always the best, especially when you and Tom walk around the house nude, but it's been a while. Too long a while. So, obliviously, you take matters into your own hands...

NSFW Alphabet. (18+)

Summary: An incredibly explicit NSFW alphabet about Tom Hiddleston, detailing his deepest fantasies and darkest truths; or how I imagine them to be, at least.

Tom Holland

Just Friends?

Summary: You and Tom have been best friends for a long time, and inseparable for just as long. The boys welcome you as one of their own, and you’re basically a part of the family. That’s your main issue, because when you begin to harbour feelings for your best friend, you’re not sure if he feels the same.

Harrison Osterfield

Quarantine. (18+)

Summary: Quarantine with a bunch of sex deprived twenty-odd year old boys isn’t your idea of fun, especially not when the only one you want refuses to pay even the slightest bit of attention. Taking measures into your own hands is only simple until you get caught.

A Happy Day (& A Puppy)

Summary: Today is the day you and Haz get a puppy. It's the next big step in your relationship, and despite your anxieties, you know it's a happy day.

Sebastian Stam

The Ballet Teacher.

Summary: Ballet teacher!reader. Sebastian's daughter attends a very prestigious ballet school, but when she's late out one day, the last thing he expects to happen is to meet her wonderful new teacher, who has him head over heels.

Timothée Chalamet

Ღ Concerto. (18+)

Summary: At a classical music concert, the last person you expect to meet is a young man as charming and suave as Timothée. And the last thing you expected is for him to invite you back to his flat. Turns out music really is food for the soul, and other things...

Fair Game.

Summary: Your boyfriend, Tim, has hurt you for the last time. You didn’t realise you could ever feel this broken, especially because of someone you once loved so much, but maybe, just maybe, it’s for the best.

Tom Felton

Risk.

Summary: After your break up, one that pained you to the bone, you try to escape and you find yourself taking that one risk you always thought you should, travelling. A simple day out, and the one person you don’t want to see is the one person who can help you with your car troubles. Could he help with your heart troubles too, over a reminiscent dinner perhaps?

Baby on the Brain.

Summary: Visiting Tom’s brother and his new baby should be a walk in the park, really, but some unwitting truths come to ahead that you can’t refute. You’ve always wanted a family, but does Tom? (Request for Tom Felton: you guys meet his brother's new baby and then decide to have your own.)

Elizabeth Debicki

Gorgeous.

Summary: Elizabeth is gorgeous, just look at her, the world can see it. A drunken night leads to some tipsy confessions, but does Elizabeth feel the same?

Christmas Morning. (18+)

Summary: Christmas morning in a hidden wintry lodge is everything you could’ve dreamed of. Then again, it’d be perfect even without the setting and the heating, because all you want for Christmas is Elizabeth, and that she gives you. Wholly.

Reunion Revenge. (18+)

Summary: At first, when your brother roped you into attending your high school reunion with your wife, you hated the idea. Now, all eyes are on you, all the focus on your career, and maybe this is the revenge you always needed, of course aided by Liz's quick thinking and hidden surprises.

Hailee Steinfeld

Live.

Summary: The first night of Hailee's tour, you're a guest singer... and her girlfriend. Everything will go to plan, surely, even when she looks that good and sings that well...

Sherlock Holmes

Ღ Kiss Me, Mr Detective. (18+)

Summary: After a fight with John leaves Sherlock feeling particularly down, he calls on the one person who is always there to support him. Only tonight, it’s different. Feelings come to a head, exploration ensues, but is this just a one time thing? That depends on whether she stays the night…

Chuck Bass

Safe.

Summary: A small British village version of Constance & St Jude’s. The aftermath of your drive home from Saturday’s house party becomes haunting and brings out a new side in you. Not that you’re complaining, especially not when you have the well-versed Chuck Bass as your friend and safety.

(Send in any requests to my inbox.)

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bl-garbage · 4 years

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to dance is to unshackle

um, okay—how else do i express this buoyant happiness that Gaya sa Pelikula has awoken inside me? i’m in complete and utter awe. i did not expect a drop of what the sixth episode has brought us. more than satisfying, it’s utterly fascinating. this is quite a lengthy post, but if you have the time, please bear with me. and since we’re already here, let’s fucking dissect the shit out of this:

right off the bat, it’s sweet how consistently written Vlad was the entire time of the show. at the start of the episode, for one, he was concerned with Karl’s disposition, saying, “anong iniisip mo (what are you thinking)?” and, later on, as we know, he pops that question again in this episode. what are you thinking? always in limbo. true, it’s considerate, yet more than that, it’s always a sign of waiting for permission. Vlad has been like this since the beginning: observant and willing to reach out, confident on the surface, yes, but always afraid of going overboard.

that is not to say that Karl isn’t. in fact, the whole dynamics of their relationship rest on the fact that they can lean on each other and just be honest. many moments show this: Karl’s desire to shift; Vlad not getting into the film lab and Karl knowing something was up; the entirety of Vlad’s birthday; Karl and Vlad’s reticence to open up to Anna, in contrast with how comfortable they feel with each other. in a nutshell, they’re each other’s homes. more on this later.

the part i was most frightened at with this episode was when Karl finally told his parents his desire to shift. to be honest, personally, i wouldn’t know exactly how that pressure on Karl feels, as i was able to study the degree i wanted. yet, back then, i had already known that my parents, who wholly supported me just the same, would have wanted a degree that leaned on science or engineering. that still sucked to know. Karl’s situation is much more complicated. his desire to shift to another course is to make up for lost time, a sense of hurrying before it really becomes all too late. this was a heavy lot to take in. the disappointment and anger in his father’s face when he dropped the bomb was too much to handle. Karl had expected it, yet its impact still hurled shrapnel that he was not able to dodge, sustaining him with several wounds. it would be curious to see how his parents come to terms with his confession. i am certain that a number of people have connected with Karl here.

which brings me to another point. Gaya sa Pelikula creates these characters with their own agency. it’s touted as a BL series, yes, but our two main characters’ point is actually not to fall in love — but to live, part of which is to fall in love. they have their hopes and dreams and own burdens to carry, and while falling in love takes centerstage here, we see how they can stand alone, on their own two feet. falling in love is central to their growth, but it is evident that love is not the whole point of their existence.

speaking of which: ate judit. ah, yes, where do i even begin to explain the exquisiteness with which ate judit was written? how, after all of five episodes, it was only now did it make sense why judit was overly, unnaturally caring and protective, a mama bear that would not let anything happen to his little Vlad. now we know why: guilt.

imagine that. being told you were the reason why your whole family went into shambles. there is much vindication in Vlad’s line of questioning, “why would you say that to a child?” (god, i’m tearing up even as i write this.) this was a pivotal scene, with a focal point on judit, the likes of whom we cannot entirely fault for not knowing any better. the fact remains that we are still in an era that fails to understand the spectrum of gender identities and the far utopia that we seek, where gender and sex would not be a damning classification anymore. and for true allies, it is in admitting that they “didn’t know then what [they] know now” that their support gains more strength. it is in confessing where they got wrong, how harmful their actions were, and in the commitment to do more, that their promise is made good.

parenthetically, can we talk about Vlad’s mom as well? have you all noticed how her voice broke when she said, “siguraduhin mong hindi ka na itatanggi niyan, ha (just make sure he won’t deny you, okay)?” was that pain, or guilt even? i wonder if we’re ever going to see her. it would be a regret not to. for so long Vlad had thought that he was the reason his father left, and that his mother was mad at his queerness. i wouldn’t want this simple call to be the resolution that the show had for him. at any rate, we have two more episodes to await, so i am not going to strike my gavel on this judgment just yet.

but whereas Vlad found his longtime coming reconciliation with his sister, Karl had no one to turn to. his call to Vlad was a cry for help. it was heartbreaking to see him like this. Karl had always put up a fake smile against any adversity that had come his way. to him, these were trivial matters that would pass, and they did so — until now. after all he was, as we would later come to know, living a script that had been prewritten before he even came to being. that explains his nonchalant demeanor toward life, the seeming discontent behind those dead eyes, and a repeated hinting that he was always yearning for so much more. at the end of the call, Karl instinctively goes to the closet - and his proverbial closet - and sees the skeletons he had hidden inside, drop in a mess.

that it was Karl’s brother who was in the photo shook me. that past was so well thought out. things made so much sense in this episode: why Karl tried to fit in, why everything seemed so fake. why he was so discomforting to watch, even! that made sense now.

and what do you do when everything has become a mess? the once seamless film that had been rolling without any glitches now sprawled on the floor, entangled in a hodgepodge well beyond fixing. when that happens, what do you do? well, you dance.

i have so many things to say about faux masculinity. it is a fact undisputed that in this society, gender roles are still very much pillars that we have yet to dismantle. our genders have been geared toward performativity, and our consolation is the external validation we receive through the acts of fitting in. in the process, we lose sight of what we really want. we blur the lines between what is and what should be, in favor of what society has demanded upon us. Karl took that role and lived by it religiously. yet, those things has gone haywire in this episode. more than his parents, it was to himself that Karl has finally admitted that the act can be dropped now: the fixed posture, those rehearsed lines, that painfully faux masculinity, on guard all the fucking time. all of those things were dropped.

that is not to say that Karl was faking all of it. there is no denying that Karl has been a masculine person most of the time. but the show portrayed before us a discarded femininity that Karl had been trying to bury deep inside him — one that all people who have been and who are still in the closet know by heart. the thing is, all of us have masculine and feminine sides, the expression of which vary at different levels in different situations. sadly, we have been preconditioned to believe that male persons must be masculine, and female persons must be feminine. Gaya sa Pelikula acknowledges this hegemony, and then throws it away all the same. true, Karl may very well be comfortable in his masculine expression, but his femininity must also be allowed to grow. one cannot be complete without embracing the entirety of who they are. many have died — been killed — for simply living who they are. society has long been a vicious environment. but people have also long fought for their fundamental right to perform these things, and through them, we know that things can change. that things are changing.

it is against this context that imprints more meaning, more gravity to when we finally, finally see Karl dance. in every sense, his dance was the show’s climax for me. it is, quite emphatically, freedom incarnate.

when i say i fucking bawled at this scene, you best believe it.

quite important to note: when Karl sees Vlad, he stopped abruptly, only for Vlad to signal to him, in an OK sign, that what he was doing was perfectly fine. that Karl could be effeminate all he wants, and who the hell in this earth should care? this allowance has given Karl all the needed validation he will ever need, at least, for that one night where they could bare it all. it was only the two of them, but the house has never been more crowded, because their feelings have seemingly exploded and have been overflowing in a glorious climax for all of us to witness. in this scene, Karl has unshackled the chains with which he had been bound all that time, and it was Vlad who helped him finally break the last of those chains. in this moment, there was only pure bliss.

(that the song playing here was Ride Home by ben&ben is the perfect giveaway. for non-Filipino readers who have only listened to ben&ben now, check this band out. it’s one of the best bands to have ever come out of the Philippine music industry.)

and, of course, in this waterfall of emotions, it is only perfect to time the moment of their first kiss. they have accepted each other, haven’t they? in a meaningful act (the gravity of which we will only realize in full later when Vlad tells the story of his dad), Karl rumpled Vlad’s hair, but only after Vlad had already consented to it. then, afterward, it was Vlad’s turn to ask, what are you thinking? to which Karl had this—and i know we all expected it, nevertheless—to say: i don’t want to think anymore. then they kissed.

i swear to god. i only watched this for the 92432475781 time.

the denouement was so well put, too: now everything is put back into its own place. Karl’s brother. his death. his parents’ expectations. the substitution. Vlad’s father. his parents’ expectations. the horror of realizing one’s difference. the abandonment. in these stories, it becomes more and more permissible to believe that Karl and Vlad have easily found comfort in each other. to say that they are soulmates (as the creator, juan miguel severo, told on his twitter) is not an exaggeration.

and, make no mistake: Karl and Vlad did not find each other’s embraces out of pity. no. it would be unduly harsh to view them that way. rather, they found solace in each other’s embrace and warmth, but it is still they who will muster the courage to face their own demons. the only difference is, they now have each other to find some sort of release. they are not destructively dependent on each other; instead, they help each other grow into the versions of themselves that they can be proud of.

finally, a couple of small things: look at the way Karl was inviting Vlad to lie in bed with him. that simple gesture harks us back to the early days of their dynamics: Vlad had expressed that it was okay to share a bed, but Karl was adamant that they do not. Karl had once dreamed of Vlad joining him there, and that scared him shitless. in contrast to that, now we have this: Karl himself inviting Vlad, and Vlad accepting for Karl’s wholehearted invitation. the moment this happened, there was a consummation of the expression of their love. if they had their doubts prior to this, those could not have been more obliterated now.

needless to say, i fucking, fucking loved this. as one who has only ever written three fanfics (2gether and History 2!), all of which seemingly related to sleeping (what the fuck, do i have a sleep fetish or something), this ending to episode 6 is just the cherry on top.

their lines by the end particularly strike me. here we have Karl who wishes to create his own stories. on the other hand is Vlad who wishes that he be in charge of the endings, too. how do they do that? who knows? but the certainty that defines their pact is that they shall do it together, unbound and free to dance to the song they have chosen of their own accord. and that simple promise, made in each other’s tight embrace under artificially warm lights amid that early january weather, with no certainty at all of what tomorrow has to bring, has made all the difference.

in 34 minutes, Gaya sa Pelikula has, yet again, done more than we could have ever expected.

i just checked and this reached 2k words. i’m not even gonna attempt to proofread this anymore. anyway, this is all i have to say for now. i just simply cannot let go of the best episode i’ve seen in this show without expressing my own reaction to it.

(also: i’m thinking of writing a fanfic; that is, the morning after. just a one-shot, hopefully a cute one. as usual, an introspection of these characters, and what lies ahead. hope i actually get to write it!)

thank you so much, Gaya sa Pelikula. you are proof that things do change.

#gaya sa pelikula #ian pangilinan #paolo pangilinan #juan miguel severo #fanfic ideas have been brewing inside me #char #bl series #philippines #philippine bl series

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 4 years

Note

Halloo, I just wanna say that after i typed the dialogue with Jamil about wanting to ride a magic carpet, (excited for your reply) I thought why not an imagine for Jamil (perhaps Kalim too?) and mc riding on the magic carpet. Then you know the accidental kiss from Aladdin. I feel so fluffy, thinking about it. IT’S A WHOLE NEW WORLD, only if that’s okay with you to write hehe please feel free to ignore my request and i understand that you have other requests to write! :)) take care of yourself!

Hello, hello.

You can read the in-character dialogue response you’re referring to here if you have not already done so. This imagine is Jamil-centric since I felt that would make the imagine flow better--and it ties in well with the dialogue response.

I watched and rewatched A Whole New World several times to try and get a sense of the feeling of flight and wonder! I wanted to impart that into my writing. I hope it was successful.

You’re in luck, Anon. This piece exceeds my usual 1000 word limit on imagines, but I made an exception since I have a friend that really loves Jamil. If you’re reading this, my friend, you know who you are.

Please enjoy, and take care of yourself as well.

***Warning: spoilers for chapter 4 of the main story campaign ahead.***

Imagine this...

“...uu. Yuu. Are you there?”

They followed the cadence of the silken call to the balcony. Yuu threw open the windows and peered down--and there he was, standing on a magic flying carpet and set in threads of red, gold, and black. An alluring, snake-like smile upon his lips.

Jamil Viper.

“I have come to steal you away for the evening, as promised,” he announced calmly, offering his outstretched hand. “Come.”

“Are you sure this is safe? The magic carpet was pretty hard for me to control before...”

Yuu tactfully neglected to add that, when they had last been piloting the carpet, it had been to escape his clutches. Yet here they were now, just a breath away from leaping back into his embrace. Oh, the irony.

“Do you trust me?” Jamil asked, his question flat and simple.

“Yes...?”

“Then all will be well.” he offered his hand again. In the darkness, his eyes were pleading, longing. “Come.”

Yuu gingerly accepted Jamil’s hand, and they immediately fell into his arms. Was that sudden floating sensation the feeling of being in the air? Or was that their stomach fluttering at his touch?

He smirked at their blushing face when they gazed up at him.

“Good girl.”

“J-Just shut up and drive already...!” Yuu sputtered back.

“Mm. As you wish. Make yourself comfortable, and hang on tight,” Jamil advised, gesturing for Yuu to sit. He reached for the tassels on the magic carpet and tugged.

They bolted into the bitter night sky, the wind nipping at their skin. Then--they dived back down, racing through past various school buildings and into the courtyard.

Shadows lurked in every twist and turn, every crook and bend. Under the moon’s silvery glow, the college seemed mysterious, mystical.

“Everything looks so pretty at night...” Yuu said quietly, taking in the sights. “It’s like a dream...”

Jamil nodded and yanked on the magic carpet again, directing it to shoot up at an apple tree. It complied at once--and he plucked a fat fruit off of a branch during the ascent. The leaves of the tree rustled and jingled upon contact

He tossed the apple at Yuu, who caught it with a free hand.

“A souvenir,” he called it, “to prove to yourself tomorrow morning that this was, in fact, not a dream.”

“Oh, stop being so cheeky,” Yuu mumbled, averting their eyes. They were lying to themselves if they said they did not appreciate the gesture.

“Speak for yourself,” Jamil retorted smoothly. “We’re going up.”

“Huh? What, even highe--w-whoah!”

The magic carpet rippled through the sky, tumbled past birds, and tore the clouds asunder. Bursts of cool water vapor kissed Yuu’s face--unexpected, but refreshing.

The carpet slowed--

And there it was.

The night sky unfurled before them, a vast swathe of black and violet fabric encrusted with diamonds. Yuu’s mind cycles through a number of words--shining, shimmering, splendid--but none of them seemed to be able to really embody the sight.

“It’s beautiful...like a whole new world,” Yuu marveled, for lack of a better term. They tried their best to etch the view permanently in their memories.

Jamil scoffed. “Hold your breath, it gets better.”

“How does it get better than this?” Yuu asked, rolling their gifted apple around in their palm. “Free food, great sights, good company...it’s perfect.”

“Oh, you’ll see.” Jamil flashed a wicked grin.

Yuu didn’t like that look of his--but there was no time for them to process what it could possibly mean.

For the magic carpet plummeted like a falling star.

Yuu’s hair flew up, and they screamed, clutching on for dear life.

The carpet flew in arcs and loops, throwing the couple every which way and back. Then, picking up speed, it dived again--and the wind barked in Yuu’s ears, sending shivers of fear throughout their whole body.

Yuu squeezed their eyes shut, bracing for impact.

“Don’t you dare close your eyes.”

Jamil’s voice was at Yuu’s ears, drowning out the whistle of wind. It was low and seductive, yet gentle...and it soothed them to their quivering core.

“Look.”

Slowly, Yuu peeled their eyes open.

The world around them unraveled.

The sky and stars above, the river they skipped across below, the grass and the trees sailing by. Mesmerized, Yuu reached out a hand and ran it across the waters. Moonlight and midnight magic dripped from their fingers.

Yuu laughed.

Yuu laughed and laughed, relishing in the moment until, at last, the magic carpet whisked them home to Ramshackle.

The ride back was a tranquil one, wordless but full of feeling. Yuu leaned against Jamil’s chest all the while. Warmth and love and tenderness enveloped them.

“I had a great time tonight!” Yuu confessed as they stepped off of the magic carpet and onto their balcony. “It was all so...magical. Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure.” Jamil brought a hand to his chest and gave a mocking bow. “It must be well past midnight by now though--and you must be off to bed.” He smiled smugly. “Do try to remember that tonight was not a dream.”

“I will,” Yuu promised. The apple remained in their hands. “Good night...” Their voice trailed off, but they were quick to throw in a last-minute remark. “Good night, my handsome prince.”

Jamil’s poker face faltered. “I am no prince.”

“You are to me,” Yuu reassured him softly.

Jamil pulled his hood over his face. The darkness of the night--and the shadow of his hood--did little to obscure the faint blush creeping onto his cheeks.

“...Rest well, princess,” he mumbled back, bringing his eyes to meet Yuu’s.

They stared at each other--knowing that they should retire for the night, but not wanting to leave the others’ presence.

If only time could stop now.

Suddenly, Jamil stumbled, lurching forward by the motion of the magic carpet. Before he--or Yuu--knew what was happening, their lips were locked.

The apple in Yuu’s hand clattered to the floor, forgotten.

Their eyes drifted shut--and they savored the feel, and the taste of one another. He cupped their face and pulled it toward his, deepening the kiss. A mewl, a whimper, escaped from Yuu’s mouth against his.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl.

A magic spell cast by the stars.

But a cheer soon pierced the silence and shattered the magical moment. “Whoo-hoo! Good going, magic carpet!”

Yuu and Jamil broke their kiss. They snapped their heads in the direction of the voice--and there stood a familiar face nestled between shrubbery and the trunk of a dead tree.

“K-Kalim?!” Jamil sputtered, his cheeks flaming. “What are you doing here?! Y-You should be asleep at this hour...!”

“Heheheh! There’s no need for sleeping when there’s love afoot!” Kalim planted his chin between his pointer finger and his thumb. “Operation make-sure-Jamil’s-First-Date-♡ ♡ ♡-is-super-duper-♡-heart-♡-thumping-and-lovey-♡-dovey is a huge success!”

“KALIM!!”

#Jamil Viper #Yuu #MC #Jamil Viper x Yuu #Yuu x Jamil Viper #MC x Jamil Viper #Jamil Viper x MC #twst #twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland requests #twisted wonderland scenarios #imagine this

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