#kinda crack headcanons

[anonymergremlin]

"Worm on a string'-P headcanon

You have to save him at least once a day from Spring. He loves playing with her but... The string boy is more of a toy to her than a friend.

"SPRING, PLEASE SPIT P OUT!"

[l3viat8an]

Rooo *hands u a mic 🎤* what do the demon brothers camera rolls look like??? 

okay this was fun XD

Silly / sweet (mostly silly) hcs!!

Lucifer ↓

So many photos of Cerberus, everything from really good photos where Cerberus is behaving to blurry pics because he won’t sit still.

A few photos of his paperwork (he keeps them like backups)

Candid photos of you-

A few photos of the two of you out together, think like sweet / date night pics <3

Photos of flowers or just random things that remind him of you. Sometimes he’ll even send them to you, just to let you know he’s thinking about you even while you’re apart.

Photos and videos of his brothers, a few candids, a few blurry messes and a few more of his brothers and you together at dinner. (From Luci’s pov it’s perfect- everybody he loves enjoying a meal together.)

Mammon ↓

Pictures of you- you studying, hanging out with him, sleeping, shopping- Mammon has pictures of you doing basically everything.

Pics of himself ofc, tons of selfies too!!

Assorted memes.

Pics of stuff he’s trying to sell online.

Screenshots of price comparison for stuff he wants to buy online.

screen shots / pics of stuff he wants to buy for you!!

Random photos of his brothers; stuff like Belphie sleeping on the couch, Asmo in the middle of doing his makeup, etc- typical older sibling, slightly embarrassing photos lolol

Levi ↓

Anime memes!

Pictures of Henry 2.0 !!!

Pics of his gaming setup so he can brag about it online.

Screenshots of every time you texted him ‘I love you’ or something sweet.

Random game screen shots.

Pics of himself in cosplay!!!-

Tons of photos of him at cons! (with and without you)

Satan ↓

High quality cat photos.

More cat photos, but it’s feral / street cats running away from him so they’re super blurry.

Cat videos.

Cat memes.

Photos of books he wants to buy.

Screenshots / photos of random book quotes or spells he wants to remember.

A few candid photos of you ofc!

a photo of Lucifer asleep at his desk, and that one time Lucifer spilled coffee down his shirt- Satan always says he’s saving them for blackmail but for some reason never uses them.

Asmo ↓

Photos of himself- soooo many selfies and every-single-one of them is hot.

His nudes + your nudes

Selfies of you and him!!!

Pics of random things, flowers, drinks, anything he thinks is pretty / cute and he can get a good pic of!!

Horrible pics / blurry videos of his brothers doing stupid shit. He uses them as blackmail :)

Beel ↓

Gym pics gym pic gym pics!!!-

But really he has some pics of himself in the gym and some videos so he can check his form.

Lots of food pics-

Screenshots of various menu's.

Videos of Belphie sleep talking.

Pics of you two out together, walking around town trying street food!

Belphie ↓

Pics of Beel working out pt.2 it’s supposed to be pics of Beel and Belphie working out- but Belphie always gives up after 1 rep.

Pics of You, Beel and Belphie cuddling in the attic!

Selfies that he usually sends to you to show off his horrible bed head-

Some blurry pics of the stars / the moon.

Pics / videos of you and him cuddling!!

Screenshots of pillows that he wants to buy-

[cosmicstarlatte]

Demon: Barbatos? Barbatos is that you!? & MC!?

MC: Stabby Sammy!!! Hey!!!

Barbatos: Oh good afternoon Stabby Sammy, a pleasure seeing you out & about.

Stabby Sammy: About time right!? Oh well I gotta run, have a good day both of you!

Barbatos: You as well.

Simeon: Stabby Sammy?

Barbatos: We met in jail

Luke: Jail!?

[noose-lion]

Hot take of the day;

Dazai is more of an alcoholic than Chuuya.

Chuuya drinks by occasion (sometimes that occasion is a celebration, sometimes it's a bar). Yes he drunk calls his ex-partner, but people can get drunk and not be alcoholic.

Dazai has a room full of empty sake bottles.

It doesn't matter either way, I just tend to ramble. (They both seem pretty alcoholic)

[apoorhuman]

Mc: there is only one thing worst than a rapist, and that is-

Beel: no brothers and mc

Belphie: no beel

Satan: lucifer

Asmo: bad skin

Mammon: no mc

Mc: no- *sigh* it's *takes a paper to reveal a "child" written on the board*

Diavolo: *gasp* a child

Lucifer and Barbatos: no-

Mc: *face palm*

[nevertheless-moving]

“The other day,” Skar added, “he was talking about what he’s doing there. It sounded an awful lot like he was learning how to read.” The men shifted uncomfortably. “So?” Kaladin asked. “What’s the problem? Sigzil can read his own language. Storms, I can read glyphs.” “It’s not the same,” Skar said. “It’s feminine,” Drehy added. “Drehy,” Kaladin said, “you are literally courting a man.” “So?” Drehy said. “Yeah, what are you saying, Kal?” Skar snapped. “Nothing! I just thought Drehy might empathize.…” “That’s hardly fair,” Drehy said. “Yeah,” Lopen added. “Drehy likes other guys. That’s like … he wants to be even less around women than the rest of us. It’s the opposite of feminine. He is, you could say, extra manly.”

Different possible explanations for this scene, to be taken up depending on which headcanon would be the funniest for a given fic:

While being gay is more broadly acceptable than being unmanly, conflating gender roles with sexuality is not uncommon; the other guys have just gotten more than one drunken lecture from Drehy about how he hates being treated womanly just because he likes dick. Kaladin was obviously working those nights.

Under Vorinism, Gender roles are rigid, but a range of sexualities are perfectly fine. The ardent who visited Kaladin's hometown was just a freak who hated gay people so much it was unreal, and took great pains to explain to the boys of this isolated rural town the unhinged idea that marrying a man was OBVIOUSLY womanly and therefore Bad. He mostly unlearned that shit after joining the army but is a bit confused. It doesn't come up often.

There was one (1) elderly queer couple in heartstone growing up, and one of the men was super gnc, which made people uncomfortable but his parents always told him that you shouldn't shame people for harmless joy. so, yeah, Kaladin just sort of figured that in a relationship between guys, one of them is the woman. He assumes Renarin is gay and I mean. He's not wrong. Part of the reason he never accepted friendly offers of soldier companionship. Not that there's anything wrong with it. He never asked Drehy who was who, because its none of his business and he didn't want to know.

the only times Kaladin has personally ever noticed being attracted to another man is when the guy was doing something womanly. Is it a kink? Is it an extremely dense man needing someone to stand on top of clearly marked social signposts and wave their arms for him to even register them as a sexual being? who knows! not Kaladin! he doesn't have time to unpack any of that. anyway he assumed that all same sex attraction worked the same way and obviously never actually talked about it with a living person. actually I'm expanding this to cover all of Kaladin's sexuality just to make him extra stupid. first time he noticed Tarah was when she punched a dude.

[thegayestmferintown]

Oh my god. I literally can only think of one thing right now. And that is Obey Me. I need Obey Me requests so bad, it's not even funny 😭

[ezralva]

My friends joked about Yuuji acting much more like a country bumpkin than Nobara despite both being from the countryside (prolly have sth to do with Yuuji's household seems to be more modest). Then I realized Choso is also a country bumpkin lmao how cute, when these two country bumpkins together I'd love to throw them to int'l airport for first class overseas flight to Dubai and see them being all jittery and excited over every little thing around them. It's their first airport and flight experience. Yuuji can't sit still on his seat, wants to see the cockpit, where the crews take rest and all, how the galleys and restrooms work etc. Choso keeps scolding him to be careful and stay on his seat, he looks calm outside but hands itching to push any button he sees and freaks out whenever the seat or partition moves, repeatedly calls the flight attendants accidentally and all that ahaahaha put Gojo into the mix being the crazy rich he is and keeps teasing fondly how hillbillies the brothers act and just watches amusedly from the side how those two annoy the fuck outta other passengers and flight crews while sneakily recording all of it on his smartphone for further blackmailing material

[zukos-other-missing-eyebrow]

sokka the twice listener x zuko the enhypen listener

[mirukosbitchywife]

aizawa who adds an ungodly amount of sugar into his coffee.

mic going into a coffee shop to get him and aizawa coffee and rattling off his order and when he gets to how much sugar to add to aizawa the baristas smile drops. "eraserhead?" she asks. the rest of the workers go silent. there's a mad rush to get to the back of the shop so they don't have to make an order, leaving only the person operating the register, who closes her eyes and sighs in resignment. "haha how'd you know, listener?" mic asks giving finger guns, the barista drops to the floor

keigo being told when meeting aizawa the first time to never comment on his drink of choice if he sees it. naturally this makes him curious so when he spots aizawa in the communal area he decides to send a feather to scope it out, and he feels as aizawa opens no less than 20 sugar packets and dump them into the cup. when aizawa walks out keigo is stood there trembling in fear as aizawa walks past him casually

denki walking into the dorm kitchen in the middle of the night to get a snack, stumbling upon aizawa dumping, quite literally, a cup of sugar into the coffee. his eyes widen in horror and he drops his phone. aizawa just slowly turns around, looks him the eyes, says "no one will ever believe you if you tell them" and FUCKING LEAVES.

bakugo mistaking aizawas water bottle as his own and as soon as he tastes it he spits it out and screams WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT. aizawa just casually says "oh, that's mine." and he freezes. when asked later he won't elaborate on what it was but denki nods towards him and he nods back.

[cilil]

Since Melkor is a being of extremes, I like to imagine that he's just... generally all over the place sometimes. For example his ego is really fragile and he tries to get constant validation and gets whiny at the slightest inconvenience, but then Mairon is like "you're annoying, go away" and instead of getting mad Melkor is just like "😍😍😍 I love you and yeah I'm awesome"

[pepteezer]

touched up and colored that one evil peppino sketch i made since i’m making a playlist for him and wanted him to be the cover u_u

Evil Peppino playlist here! 🖤🍕🔪

[aspiringnexu]

LOTR but it works like Undertale in that when you die everything resets. But like a hardcore version of Undertale where you die and have to start at the very beginning.

Everyone in the Fellowship is aware of it and it first comes about because Gandalf dies and they all end up back in Imaldris and very confused (it happens in Lothlorien for them because Gandalf takes a few days to kill the Balrog and then die and it takes a bit for Manwe to kick him back). So they set out again with the weirdest sense of Deja Vu and this time they make it through Moria without even meeting the Balrog because Pippin remembers not to touch the arrow. Then Boromir dies and back to square one.

And this keeps repeating over and over and over as their actions to keep one from dying accidentally cause someone else to die until they have all of the steps down pat and no longer give a shit except managing to move on from the fucking Anduin. They’ve been stuck there for days (not counting the time it took to march there from Imladris, through Moria, and through Lothlorien, over and over and over and over again).

Rinse and repeat as Sam accidentally falls to his death via One Slippery Rock, Legolas gets nailed by a very lucky Orc in Moria, it turns out Gimli can’t swim and neither can Legolas or Aragorn when trying to pull a fully armoured dwarf to the surface, Aragorn gets run over by Eomer, Merry and Pippin take turns getting skewered by hungry orcs, and Frodo gets murdered by Gollum (who is the only other one to know about the resets and is pretty cranky by the time he catches up).

And without fail, every single time one of them dies they get sent back to Imladris. At first its terrifying, then just plain confusing, then terribly depressing, and then... well they get used to it. Death no longer has meaning. The Quest suddenly seems a lot more cheerful. The end of the world is a lot less daunting when you know you can perpetually keep it from ending until you make sure you can fix it.

Though it is a bit confusing for everyone else during the Battle of Helm’s Deep when Gimli and Legolas are having their competition.

“Legolas! Two already!”

“I’m on seventeen!”

“Eh! I’ll have no pointy-ear outscoring me!”

Later

“Final count fifty-one thousand two hundred and eighty-two.”

“Well that’s not bad for a pointy-eared elvish princeling! I myself am sitting pretty on fifty-one thousand two hundred and eighty-three.”

[noose-lion]

You know how a puppy (or a dog who doesn't grow to full size) has big paws in proportion to they're body?

To me, Chuuya is like that. He's got big hands and feet in proportion to his body. As a teenager he'd trip really easy and have to catch himself with his ability.

[lemme-just-oops]

Hi! How will AT boys react when mc jokingly wants to kiss them 😭 will they let mc kiss them? (Separate)

Alpheratz: His reaction is different every day. He will either let you and then joke about how that was a good-night-kiss, or he refuses so strictly, that he would rather fight a war than jokingly kiss anyone. No one can ever predict the way he would react. Some claim that he used to play spin-the-bottle a lot in his first school year, but no one has any proof.

Arcturus: He's been kissing you for the last hour, and at this point, everyone is just amazed that you did not push him away yet. He is blushing a lot, but he is physically affectionate to everyone who does not draw a boundary. People have bets how long his longest platonic kiss will be and with whom. That information is always in the school's yearbook.

Pollux: If you do not immediately state that you do not mean it seriously, the situations are going to get awkward. A kiss, just like that? Look, he always felt that way about you, but- He rants on about how he feels for you, until you interrupt him. If you reject him, he will laugh and say that he was just joking, but you can see him holding back tears. If you do not reject him, those tears of joy are not held back.

Sirius: He reacts allergic to kisses, so he does his best to avoid them. Any attemot you'll ever make will end with him transforming into a random animal and create a distance. Acts oblivious, as though no moves were made. His flirtatious words? Never happened, you imagine them.

Spica: You did not sign up for the consequences to your actions. It has been two hours since you suggested a kiss, and he is still telling you about the history of romance in this world, and how different cultures show affection differently. It might be interesting, but this was not planned. If you listen closely, though, he begins quoting books and how kisses are portrayed in them. Some of the books are fanfictions. He reads them. A lot. Prints his favorite fanfictions, highlights his favorite quotes and hides them in his desk.

Vega: He rejects it, and his face is unhealthily red. Later that day, Sirius sends you a video of him standing in front of Vega's room. Vega is heard, although his words cannot be understood. He regrets his decisions.

[mrsmiagreer]

Avior sweetie…You’ve managed to make me cry laugh and smile in endearment within the past like….two days.