#lesbians are valid

[tofu-gaycat]

This is the time to talk how exactly compulsory heterosexuality (comphet) affected me and in what ways trough my life, this is more of an intro post and a personal story.

When I was young I was always told that “guys should look after me and will pay attention to me eventually, that will make me happier and just be essential with time”. Even back then I didn’t understand what so cool about dating a guy? What makes him so special and why each girl should do this somehow? That it brings kids? Isn’t our planet already overpopulated? Some people can be child free? Even when I was small I didn’t really care for this “aspect of happiness” and therefore wasn’t affected compulsory heterosexuality due to my young age and attitude - I didn’t see my future where I settle down with a man.

Everything has changed when I thought I caught a first crush for a guy since everyone around me already did and it so cool. It wasn’t cool and it wasn’t a crush in the first place, it was a first example of attraction I needed to unconsciously fit in. After this I’ve developed another one-funny how both of guys were unavailable and of course ones I made in my head. Back then I couldn’t even bring myself to a thought that it was comphet. After I’ve finally came with terms that I was lesbian all along (May of 2022) and was repressing my attraction to women, I explained it as an attraction to men didn’t feel so real as it is to women, plus I’ve never had an attraction to men who were available and ones who were available were pushed away by me (literally lol). Even when I did so I couldn’t give it a name and just thought it was my unique experience and people don’t usually deal with it…I was wrong.

In one of my previous posts I shared a lesbian doc: it says that having attraction to unavailable men (fictional and ones unavailable irl) not seeing your future with a man and just feeling as this attraction is forced - is a huge sign of comphet (you can read it for yourself).

However, the story doesn’t end here since trough those almost 2 years I couldn’t live without having a damn crisis. I went back and forth from lesbian to bisexual - all due to same reason and wanting “to fit in” aka being forced into standards by compthet- the past issue like this is no easy to fight with even after years of being sure. I’ve never in my life felt legitimately sexually and romantically attracted to men. I can recall liking several girls and women and it felt real and not forced. Funny enough how despite getting romantic attraction almost never - I felt it for woman anyway. So all my “crises” ended in their own when I recall that comphet is still there and can affect anyone so it’s important to outline an issue so your true self won’t have to hide away.

In the end, I believe that it takes a while to spot and realise your comphet, how to fight with it and seek similar experiences. Don’t worry - being a lesbian is beautiful and no one should tell you otherwise <3

P.s I will make more posts about my exact experience with it so stay tuned!

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Love for y’all, stay safe👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏽

Meme by @louvainisntacity

[alix-is-o-a-k]

Shout out to the queer kids who live in an accepting area but still aren’t sure they’re always accepted.

shout out to the kids who’s parents are *fine* with them, but nothing more than that.

shout out to the kids that had a really awkward coming out, and no one’s mentioned it since.

shout out to the kids who’s straight friends like to discuss queer issues, and often have the a skewed idea of what’s ok.

shout out to kids who are mostly accepted, but still would rather leave.

You’re valid

(I very much liked a recent reblog from @morsobaby: those whose parents are “being accepting in actions rather than mindset” <3 this is for you too)

[starberry-skies]

i post for PACEY PUFFERFISH AND PACEY PUFFERFISH ONLY BAYBEEEE

i also post for for alexis anglerfish, delano dorado fish, gracie grouper fish, and lois lionfish.

y'all take care of urselves, stay weird and stay kind, goodnight everypony.

[queerism1969]

[joeburrowposting]

fellow lesbians do you guys also feel ashamed sometimes to talk about a woman you find attractive or to talk about a woman sexually because you're worried about objectifying them or coming off as misogynistic or is this just a me thing

[melittosphex]

Vampworld bubbline sketchdump bc I have the brainrot 😔

[zerosuitsammi3]

Youre. ... amazing...

[that-bisexual]

[2deadkat]

Why are there so many lesbians at the gazette

Can’t forget this one

[befemininenow]

Trans lesbians are also valid. Happy Lesbian Day everyone!

Illustration done by the wonderful Pink-Horizons over at DeviantArt.

[hyakunana]

"Were you even listening? How many reports, Ikora? How many times did I tell you what I saw?"

[oro-junestar]

why do people gatekeep queer identies?? like,, isn't the whole point of the queer community that we're sick of being told who we are and aren't allowed to be?? stop shunning queer people for being queer in ways you don't like

[queerism1969]

[applebees4prez]

everyone in barbieland is asexual and aromantic btw. they’re all the bestest friends and in love with each other but never romantically. just so you know.

[morsobaby]

Remember to support severely mentally ill people this pride month btw!! If someone's identity is caused by delusions that's not your fucking place to come tell them they're wrong. If someone's identity is caused by trauma that's none of your fucking business. If someone identifies with one label due to comfort or shared experiences even though some other label would "fit better" don't fucking comment. And leave those fucking plural and autistic Xenogender people, whose genders revolve around their headspace, alone!

We need to be aware and willing to accept that mental illness does often affect one's queerness and is often in a complex relationship with it. You do not!! Get a free pass to invalidate someone's identity based on their mental or physical health.

[beck404]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!

Always remember you’re loved and SO valid no matter your sexuality, gender identity, the labels you use, if you’re unlabelled, queer, etc. The queer community is really big so please remember to be kind to others, their experience might not be the same as yours (just as your experience might not be the same as everyone else’s) but we have all struggled with something. Spread love, spread validation and be PROUD of who you are!!

That being said, remember that you don’t owe your sexuality to anyone! It is YOUR decision to come out or keep it private, you don’t have to feel pressured to come out, know your sexuality or even label it. You are you and nobody else can tell you who or what you are!

Also a HUGE thank you to Alice for creating the hearstopper universe, the way it celebrates the LGBTQ+ community in such an authentic and inclusive way, the representation i never thought i’d see i now see it every day thanks to you!! My words will never be able to describe how grateful i am, but thank you for giving me Nick Nelson, the bisexual representation i so desperately needed 🩷💜💙