#like I’m just being anxious and not enjoying these last few years (?) and im going to be a mess for months anyway when it happens

[segretecose]

.

[cheolhub]

LOVE SCENE — LEE SEOKMIN ࿐

summary. you’re scared that seokmin might want to go separate ways after graduation, but he proves, in more ways than one, that he wants you. forever.

wc. 2.3k

warnings. college au. nerdy soft dom!seokmin, breeding kink xx, obscene amounts of dirty talk, pinch of angst, literal love making, unprotected sex, marriage kink, HEAVY praise, baby talk, v minimal plot im sorry — MINORS DNI 18+

note. DAMN ok i have a lot to say so i’ll keep it short. ONE this was a request but like i kinda didn’t do anything the request asked for and im so sorry, i hope u can forgive me anon. TWO i literally lost sight of the plot so dont ask me abt any missing details ehehb just enjoy seok being hot <3 THREE happy belated birthday to my minnie <3 FOUR thank u to my luvr @rkiv4d for beta-ing. yas ok enjoy

p.s. reblogs and feedback are extremely appreciated— i also love to hear ur thoughts <3

how seokmin pulled you, the most beautiful girl to ever walk the earth, he has no clue. he’s what people call a ‘nerd’ with his thick-rimmed glasses and his abnormally high IQ and you’re the pretty girl that didn’t understand the simplicity of covalent and ionic bonds who fell head over heels for him. 

you couldn’t help it, he was so smart and so fucking pretty. he was awkward and he giggled when he got nervous and he was so unbelievably goofy that it had you laughing till you cried. nevertheless, he was the most beautiful man ever. 

then you asked him out. he remembers it like it was yesterday. the last day of your chem class– the end of the first semester of your sophomore year– right after your final. you thanked him incessantly, giving him a hug for helping you get a B in the class. you told him you’d rather thank him another way— another way being a date. with you. at your place with a homemade dinner. 

he would’ve been stupid to decline. so he didn’t. and the rest was history. seokmin became your boyfriend, grew more confident in himself, and fell in love with you.

now you’re in your final year, the last few weeks approaching quickly, and you’ve been anxious. anxious about seokmin leaving you, anxious about going separate ways after graduation, anxious that this was all just fun and games till it was time to get serious about life.

seokmin has picked up on your behavioral patterns over the past 2 years. he knows you so well, probably better than anyone else in your life– probably better than he knows himself. 

so when seokmin sees you evading his eyes with his cock stretching you open, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“hey,” he whispers, stilling inside of you. when you don’t turn your head and your eyes are still closed, he calls for you. “baby?”

you feel your heart clench at the pet name. “hmm?” you hum.

“baby, do you not wanna do this anymore?” he questions worriedly, ready to pull away from you. “i can pull out.”

you mumble, “i-i do.” 

he cocks his head even more confused, “talk to me, pretty, what’s going on?”

he pushes into you some more, making you gasp and you can feel his expectant eyes burning holes into your face. you then realize he’s not gonna let this go, but it’s partially your fault for letting your mind wander while he was putting away the dinner you guys ate. you decide to just come out with it.

“‘m just… so scared of graduating…” you whimper between your words, eyes screwing tighter. 

he hums, “look at me, baby.” the demand comes out so soft, yet the sheer dominance of his voice makes you clench around him. you turn your head on the pillow, opening your eyes, and finally looking at him. “why?”

you shudder at the eye contact. he looks so pretty, so concerned over you, yet you’re still tense and oh-so nervous. the topic of post-grad has never come up, and now you’re mid-fuck about to tell him how you want to be with him forever. 

“i-i’m scared that… that you’re gonna go off without me,” you pant, hands wrapping around his biceps and holding him to keep you stable. 

“where am i gonna go, beautiful?” he whispers, bottoming out and fully sheathing himself inside of you. 

you whimper again, his massive cock filling you so well. “s-scared you’re gonna go do big things ‘n leave me…” 

he freezes at that, eyes widening, “leave you?” he asks incredulously as if he couldn’t believe that you’d ask that question. “baby, you think i’d leave you?” 

you nod slowly. “i dunno, ‘s just that i’ve been thinking ‘n you’re so smart– gonna go get a real job that’s across the country or something…” 

he’s honestly bewildered. why would you ever think something like that when he’s tried so hard to show you how much he loves you every single day?

“oh, baby, i would never fucking leave you.” he presses his forehead yours, nose rubbing against yours. “pretty fucking thing, i adore you— love you. more than anything.”

your eyes glisten with tears at the reassurance. you feel yourself relax under him, entirely fluttering at his words. “really?”

“yes, really. how can i prove it to you? want me to put a ring on your finger?” he whispers, breath fanning against your face. 

you gasp, clenching around him again, fingers digging into his muscles. he smiles, chuckling airly at your reaction. 

“my pretty baby wants that? you like that idea?” he asks, his sultry voice filling your ears. “you wanna be my wife?”

you nod your head, eyes fluttering shut as you moan, “yeah, w-wanna be your wife.” 

your response has seokmin reeling. he pulls his hips back and slams back into you making both of you moan again. 

“yeah? bet you want my kids, too.” he states boldly, mind cringing at his words and internally freaking out that you’ll get turned off at them. 

you choke, clamping tightly around his length. “f-fuck.” you cry. “d-don’t say things like that, seok.”

“why? ‘cuz i’m right?” he grunts, thrusts growing faster.

you nod your head and seokmin nearly cries, cock twitching at the idea of pumping you full of cum and getting you pregnant with his kids. you’d be such a great mom and he’d love having a mini-seok running around a nice, big house fit to take a family. 

admittedly, he’s been wanting to talk about his future with you. he’s been fantasizing about it since the first time he said he loved you. fantasizing about you being his wife and living together in a big house and having three kids and living happily ever after as if it were some fairytale. he’s imagined your kids and how they would be a constant reminder of his everlasting love for you. he hopes that they’ll look like both of you– kids with your eyes and his nose. he’d kill for that.

“wanna put a baby in you,” he mumbles, lips ghosting over yours. “swear to god, ‘m gonna give you everything you want– ‘ll get you a ring ‘n a house– everything. just say the word.”

you lift your head to press your lips to his, moaning into his mouth like a mad woman. your stomach drops in anticipation, suddenly craving the feeling of his warm cum filling you to the brim, sure to get you pregnant. your legs wrap around him, heels digging into his back and you can’t resist the cry that he ends up swallowing at the new angle. 

seokmin pulls back, panting, “gonna let me give it to you, baby?” 

“uh-huh!” you nod, eyes screwing shut and jaw going slack as his speed increases. “yes, yes, please give it to me.” your response is wavered as you nearly choke on a sob of pleasure. 

and you know the decision is haste– a baby even though you still have a month left of undergrad seems… absurd to say the very least, but you don’t need to think about anything. you know seokmin. you know he’s the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. he's an amazing boyfriend and person in general. you already know he’d make an even more amazing husband and father. 

who would’ve thought the nerdy man with glasses who was insanely good at chemistry would be the one you ended up with?

he lets out a guttural moan, “such a good girl, always saying please.” he praises, slamming into your sweet spot repeatedly.

and jesus fucking christ, your moans and cries are like music to his fucking ears. 

his head falls into your neck, licking and sucking at your skin. “never gonna leave, i promise. gonna make you mine, gonna take care of you.” he mumbles into the skin as he continues to mark and ravage you. 

the stimulation and his words are sending you into orbit as your stomach churns and tightens at the feeling of his cock rearranging your insides. his strokes are impressive, never missing a beat and unrelentingly hitting the spot that makes you crumble. 

he feels you tighten around him, gummy walls squeezing him in and he curses, “shit, is my pretty girl gonna cum already?” his voice borders on condescending, but it only makes the tightrope in your stomach all the more closer to completely unraveling. 

“y-yeah, so close,” you moan breathily as your pants increase, chest rising and falling rapidly. “so fuckin’ close, min, ‘m gonna cum.”

his lips find your ear and he whispers hotly against the shell, “come on, baby, cum for me so i can fill you up.” he gently tugs at your earlobe with his teeth and you can’t resist, back arching with a shiver running down your spine.

your orgasm brings you immense pleasure, white spots filling your vision as you cum with a loud sob. you feel it in your entire body, from your curled toes to your thrown back head. your eyes roll back, calling out his name and raking your nails down the skin of his arms. 

he coos, holding back a groan at the way you get even tighter as you soak him in arousal. “thaaat’s it, baby, just like that. so, so good for me.” he coaxes you through your euphoric high, fucking you through it as he always does. 

“s-so good,” you slur, parroting his words as your mind numbs a bit. 

he moans, letting the sound of your whimpers and the lewd sounds of your bodies meeting fill the room. he buries his head in your neck again, desperately rutting into you so he can let go, too. your eyes flutter closed again and you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer to you. 

your overstimulated pussy pulses around him as you listen and whine along to your lover's muffled moans. you can tell he’s close. so close to giving you the life you’ve imagined for almost 2 years. so close to being yours forever. 

“seok, cum inside me,” you whisper and his hips stutter, yet they keep moving as if they have a mind of their own. he lifts his head and looks at you– his eyes are clouded over and teary, yet they’re filled with all the love in the world.

he looks so beautiful above you. his face is scrunched up in pleasure, brows knitted, eyes droopy, mouth hung open as pretty sounds exit his loose lips.

“i… fucking love you…so much.” he says in between pants, thrusts growing sloppy. the telltale signs of his fast approaching orgasm becoming heavily apparent. “god, so much, baby, love you so much.”

you nod your head, mirroring his pleasured face. “me too, seok, i love you.” your words are a bit scrambled, but seokmin makes sense of them– understands you so well. 

his eyes roll back a bit at your response, brain momentarily malfunctioning, but he comes back seconds later. “gonna take this load like a good girl, right, pretty? gonna get pregnant and let me marry you?” he moans out breathily, cock now twitching uncontrollably. 

“yes, yes, yes, please, wan’ it so bad!” you beg.

it’s all he needs to press his hips to yours, stilling there, and releasing inside of you while he moans out your name so prettily. it’s a newfound feeling for both of you– his cum coating your cunt, filling you up till it’s spilling on his freshly washed sheets. he’s grown accustomed to finishing on your skin or into a condom, but this? this is all very new. this is something he now can’t live without.

you think the same thing when you feel him spraying your walls with his thick ropes of cum. it feels so good– so euphoric– while it’s leaking out of you. you don’t know how you’ve gone your entire adult life without experiencing this at least once.  

“c-came so much, baby…” you whimper, feeling him pull his cock out of you. 

as soon as he sees his release dripping out of you, he groans softly, already feeling hard again, but he decides to ignore it for now, bringing his attention back to you.

“hey… love,” he says softly, noticing the way you perk up a bit from your tired state just at the sound of your name. “you should’ve told me you felt like that… i hate that you thought i’d just leave you ‘cause we won’t be in school anymore.”

you frown, “i’m sorry, i didn’t know how to bring it up without being awkward… it’s the real world and i dunno… things are different.”

he sighs, hands running up and down your naked sides. “i get it, but like i said, i wanna be with you forever.”

you blush, biting your lip to hide the wide grin that ends up on your face despite the fact. “yeah, i remember… was that a proposal by the way?” you ask meekly. 

he squeezes at your waist, “did you want it to be?” he beams.

“i mean, it was a bit untraditional, definitely not how i expected my wedding proposal to be.” 

“what? you mean you didn’t think you’d get proposed to while i had my dick inside you?” he asks with faux incredulity. “i, for one, thought this was the best proposal ever. i even put a lil baby in you.”

you giggle, wrapping your legs around his body again, “you don’t know that, i’m not pregnant… yet.”

his heart swells at the idea and he smiles brightly at your blushy face, “well, maybe another round can change that, hmm?”

you pull him closer to you by the strength of your legs and say, “make me yours then, seokmin.”

© cheolhub — all rights reserved, please refrain from copying, reposting, modifying or translating my work on any platform.

[dallysnecklace]

i just wanna say i love your writing it's masterful

could you do a sleepy/cuddles Sodapop x fem!reader for my poor lonely soul please and thank you<3

“You work too much.”

Pairing: Sodapop Curtis x fem! Reader

Summary: To support yourself, you work multiple jobs. Your boyfriend starts to notice the toll this takes on you.

Warnings: Overworking, established relationship

A/N: Thank you so much for your kind words!! I’m so sorry this took me fucking forever, it got lost in my drafts but I found it!! I will never take this long

The phone rang as you hid away from the loud noise of the diner, tucked away in the corner. You had just worked a triple shift to be able to afford your rent this month, which you stupidly had put off for the last week.

“Hello?” A voice came through the line. Presumably Darry.

“Hey Darry, it’s Y/n. Is Soda there?” You said, being polite.

“Yeah I’ll get ‘im for you.” There was a pause. You twirled the cord around your finger, beginning to become anxious.

“Hey, Y/n. Everything okay?” Sodas voice said, softly.

“Yeah, I’m just tired and had a long day. Do you think you could pick me up? If not I totally get it-“

“Hey, it’s fine. I’ll be there in like 7 minutes.” He interrupted your nervous rant.

You let out a sigh of relief.

“Okay. Thank you so much.” You responded.

“Anything for my girl.” He said. You could picture his smile in your head.

“I love you, Soda.” You said, grateful for his presence in your life.

“Love you too, sweets.”

You put the phone back on the holder, and went to wait outside. It was a cold winter night, one you wished you could’ve enjoyed at home.

You left your home about 2 years ago when they weren’t supportive of you going to school. You had grew up in a strict household that unfortunately believed that women were worth less than men. Your family never took school seriously, and wanted to pull you out once you were 14. They believed that at that age, you were expected to start helping around the house, and start looking for a man to marry. But, over the years you really enjoyed school and wanted to pursue a life in academia. When you told your parents this, they kicked you out.

You moved a few towns over to Tulsa. You originally lived at Bucks, where you met Dallas. He wasn’t the nicest to you, but he eventually warmed up to you and even introduced you to the gang, where you met Soda. These boys seemed to understand your struggle of living alone and going to school. You finally felt like you had a group of people to support you, which you had never experienced before.

Suddenly you saw an old beat up car pull up, and a honk broke the sound of the crickets at night.

You hopped in the front seat, looking over to your boyfriend, who held a worried look.

“Hey sweets.” He said, grabbing your hand and kissing it.

“Hi.” You said, barely having enough energy to talk.

Sodapop took the message, and started to drive home. A comfortable silence wafted over to two of you as he drove back to his place. There was an unsaid agreement that you would be staying with him tonight.

On the way home, you fell asleep, lulled by the soft music playing and sodas humming.

Once you got to Sodas house, he woke you up, by picking you up bridal style and carrying you in.

Soda stepped in the doorway, to be greeted by Darry and Pony.

Darry looked up, “Hey, is she okay?” He questioned, worried for his brothers girlfriend. He really had grown attached to you, and was worried about you. He knew what it was like to have to work multiple jobs and take care of others.

Soda responded, “Yeah, she just needs to rest. Can she stay over tonight?”

“Of course, she can stay here whenever.” Darry responded, seeing you stir and start to wake up.

You woke up, at adjusted your eyes to peer upon Sodas chin, turned towards Darry.

“Hey, Thanks for letting me stay Dar.” You sleepily smiled, a blush on your cheeks from having Darry see Sodapop carrying you in.

“It’s always fine honey, you know that.” He walked back into the kitchen, leaving you and Soda alone.

He silently walked to his room, sitting you on his bed. He kneeled down onto one knee, taking your shoes off carefully. He stood back up, cupping your chin in his hand, and kissing your forehead.

“Do you want to change into something more comfortable?” He asked, making sure you were okay with it.

“Yeah.” You simply replied, causing him to get up and open his drawers, picking out a clean shirt for you to wear to bed.

He handed you the clothing, and you went to the bathroom to change.

“Jesus christ I’m tired.” you exclaimed, looking at your reflection in the mirror; noticing the dark circles acting as a shadow on your face.

You quickly changed, walking back to Sodas room. You were excited to finally get some rest. Tomorrow you weren't working, and school was out for the day. Finally a day to just relax.

As soon as you walked in, Soda took you into an embrace. You quickly melted in his arms, finally feeling like you could let go.

“Do you wanna go to bed?” He whispered.

You nodded into his chest, feeling him pick you up and place you on his bed. You got underneath the covers feeling at peace. You felt the bed dip beside you, and felt Sodas two arms pull you in, letting your head rest on his chest.

You didn’t really feel like talking, so you just held him tighter and kissed his exposed collarbone; a sign of your gratification. He dipped his head down, pulling you head up by his hand on your chin and kissed your lips softly, but filled with love.

“You work too much.” He whispered against you lips, kissing them quickly once again, “Maybe you should just live with us. You wouldn’t have to worry about rent and could focus on school.”

You looked up at him, ready to argue against his kindness, but decided against it. You were lucky you had this kind of support system.

“Thank you.” You whispered, kissing his jawline quickly, settling your head into his neck.

“I love you sweets.” He said as he rested his head back into the pillows.

“I love you too.” You responded back, in an instant.

You smiled, and rested your head against his chest again. He was so warm. Perfect for this cold winter night, and although you weren’t able to spend the whole night with him, you were forever grateful for these small moments before the both of you drift into sleep.

[desultory-suggestions]

hi there, thank you so much for running this blog! i have been following you for a long time and appreciate what you do so much, and i’ve been struggling with something and was looking for an ear or some advice so i thought i would come here.

this summer has been pretty hard on me mentally for a few reasons. being back home with family, as I live across the country for university and even studied abroad this semester, it’s always an adjustment living with people I love but sometimes struggle dealing with. i’m also back to an environment where I have no strict schedule, less friends, no privacy, no personal space, etc., and i got pretty sick for a portion of the summer.

this is my last summer before i graduate and i put many expectations on myself for how it would go (fun/personal life wise, but also academics/career wise). despite this sense of urgency and also these expectations, this past month of june i basically just rotted away in my bed, feeling depressed and anxious and not really doing anything about it. i did go out and about a few times and even got myself hired for two jobs, but there were so many responsibilities i ignored while rotting away and just feeling miserable for myself. now im finally clawing my way out of this hole i dug for myself, and im realizing how much i screwed myself over—all of the things i need to do would have been so much easier and enjoyable (!!!!!) had i not procrastinated. it feels like my memory for june is mainly just a haze when it could have been so great.

my question is—how do i cope with these feelings of self-disappointment, and almost self-disgust for the time i lost? for the moments i could have been better but didn’t? how do i cope with the knowledge that my summer could have looked totally different now, and that the power was in my hands to change it? the rest of my summer is looking pretty busy as i scramble to pick up the missing pieces, and im sad because i wanted it to feel special since it’s my last summer of university. any time i acknowledge the challenges i faced and the victories i did have just feels like making excuses for myself.

anyways, sorry for this ramble, and thank you for your time! i hope you are doing well and enjoying yourself.

Hello, dearest. First of all I want to tell you that I am so proud of you. I know right now you’re struggling with these heavy feelings, and it’s important to know that despite your inner struggles you are seen and loved and respected by those around you.

It sounds like you have worked very hard and been very busy for a long time. I know as a full time college student myself that the amount of work expected of us is often unbearable. People talk about it like a simple process, a part time commitment. It is not! You have been working a constant minimum of a full time job, plus additional work for pay, plus travel, plus family and friends needs, plus basic self care. Of course all of this can be so overwhelming and lead to a sense of burn out. Changing the language you use is giving reasons is not making excuses. Cultivate a mindset of correcting yourself:

“I’m making excuses -> I’m acknowledging the challenges and moving forward.”

I found quickly into college my high achiever mindset flipped into a constant sense of failure. I felt like I couldn’t do anything right, and like I just fell behind everyone else I respect. I wallowed in this for far too long, so trust me when I tell you not to spend all your time worrying about the past. Everyone has had a time like these, sometimes weeks, months, and sometimes years. But it is never too late to change the present and future.

You may not feel like it, but if summer meant laying in bed and barely doing anything maybe that’s what you needed. If your body and mind were too beaten down to do much, that’s not your fault. Remember that you are just one person, and this was one summer. You will have countless more summers to live out your dreams. Summer 2022 I barely left my room, depression, anxious, I pretty much rotted in bed! I was burnt out and struggling. Summer 2023 I worked my ass off at my new job, made friends, and started going to parties and even a music festival. Summer 2024 is now, and I’m in a solid mix of work, school, friends, and working to take care of myself. Life will not always look how we imagine it too, but often it will turn out much better.

Nothing that has already happened can be changed, all you have power over is the current and the future. Tons of people express the same sentiment to me

“I didn’t do X and now all I do is Y and it makes me feel Z so I don’t do X!”

And I totally understand! But this is the trap right here! This is what resembles the grave but isn’t! The more time you spend contemplating what you should have done the more past you create where you didn’t do what you wanted. It is so important to develop the ability to go “oh well, what do I want Now?” This takes practice. When you catch yourself in the internal doomscroll of all that you should have done, literally say “oh well, that’s the past. What do I want to do right now and how can I do it?”

Actions you can take:

- Make a list of goals you have tiered by right away, short term, medium term, and long term. Make sure to include a tier for goals that feel impossible! You’d be surprised what you can do!

- Start by picking one thing you want to change. Go on a walk every day, listen to an audiobook or music on that walk. Bam! Two enriching activities at once. Cook one new recipe a week or every other week.

- When at home from school, work to establish your independence in the home. This is hard! Family dynamics vary, but if you can, try to communicate with your family about personal space and boundaries. Perhaps rearrange your space at home to fit your needs as a more adult space while still maintaining your nostalgic environment.

- Cultivate a positive mindset and excitement for what comes next. This summer is not just an end, it’s a beginning! What do you want next? You can have it if you believe in yourself.

A final piece of advice. I started college with such high hopes and dream of what it would be. The summers with friends, late night studying in the library, goofing off between classes, getting to be this dream idealized self. For various reasons, this didn’t happen. I felt so angry that my experience with college had been tainted and forcefully taken from me, and I stayed angry for a while. This constant obsession with regret starts to eat you alive until you can’t see how good things are right in this moment. This did not get better because I somehow changed the past, it got better because I accepted that this was an idealized dream of one tiny part of my life. It got better when I started aiming towards the future. It’s ok to feel sad that you didn’t get what you wanted, but that doesn’t mean you never will. I am happier for moving on and saying I’d had enough grieving a hypothetical. You are real, you are young and alive and filled with dreams. It will never be too late, and there is nothing you could have missed this summer that cannot be achieved in a happier and healthier situation.

Start making today special. You are filled with light, dreams, and love. You will create the life you dreamed of, filled with adventure and happiness. Treat yourself tenderly, this is your first time being alive, the first last summer of college. You are learning and growing. I am so proud of you as you are now, and all that you will become. Keep the sparks alive, and I’m always here if you need someone to support or another senior in college to lean on!

I hope this helps!

Evan

P.S. here’s a poem that’s helped me!

[peachjagiya]

https://x.com/sofini123/status/1822021683663761414?s=46&t=Xwy3F-OqT2vgT3Xa7r868g

i’m finding different peoples’ takes on the vibe of the show rlly interesting. i personally didn’t sense an awkward vibe and i didn’t think they had nothing to talk about/no convo of substance. cuz tbh what else would they discuss other than lighthearted things and just joking around? it’s a show for the fans to see so i doubt they’d be immediately jumping into some deep conversation about their views on society and the world LOL. ig also to me, when im w a very close friend who ive known for years and i already know what’s going on in their life, theres not that many “new” things to talk about ? like it’s more so quick catching up and then you just resort to random conversations and being playful. idk maybe that’s just me. ofc deep conversations come up w close friends too but i’d never expect that from this type of documentary series which is clearly just meant to be fun and following them on their random outings/adventures.

but i have seen a few other ppl say they felt a super awkward and off vibe though so maybe im just missing something ? whatever it may be i still think the interactions are cute and very entertaining. im super excited (also a bit nervous/anxious) to see tae in the next episode. i think it’ll be a lot of fun w the three of them and im sure it’ll settle into something comfortable for the three of them within the first few interactions of all being together. i do wonder how they’ll frame the dynamic though. id we’ll see something vaguely equal or if it’ll be framed as jimin being the middle man as it has in the past. to me that would so obviously be convoluted since we know jungkook and tae have been hanging and much closer than vmin or jikook (who clearly hadn’t seen eo at all lol). but ik it’s not like they’ll rlly show just how close tkk are anyways so who knows. sorry this got so long, i went on a tangent 😭😭

Don't apologise!

I did sense awkwardness in ep1. I feel like "matched energy" has stopped being words that mean anything because I've used them so much over the last 24 hours but it's a good way to explain.

It's not about what they had to talk about. It's about the mismatch of mood and energy. But many things can influence that! Long flights, nervousness at doing a reality show without the other members, a foreign country, illness, not having seen each other for a while. Mismatched energy can be temporary or permanent. In their case, I felt it was temporary.

However, to my mind, what sets Taekook aside is that their energy is rarely mismatched and if it ever is, they're super adaptable to each other's mood and able to come out of it very fast. See Inkigayo. JK in a grump, Tae arrives smiley. Mismatch. But it's resolved in moments, seconds even, with soft words and Tae drawing on a thing JK loves. That unconscious immediate reconfiguring to find balance is COUPLE 101 to me.

By his own admission, Jimin enjoys winding JK up, amping up the awkward, like a big brother with his little brother. Redressing the balance is not at the forefront of his mind and to me, and this is very much just my thoughts, that's what felt awkward in ep1.

Thanks anon! 💜

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi, reading your posts made me realize I’m likely an INFJ in a terrible loop. For the last 6 months i’ve been reading about mbti I thought I was INTJ, and every test i tried said it too, but i didnt and still don’t understand Fe vs Te, even after reading your posts. But INFJ in a loop sounds a lot like me. So let’s go with that.

My auxiliary function is suffering. When I’m outside I have this tendency to observe people, the room, their behavior and enjoy dwelling in it, as if I’m reading a novel. It bothers me when someone says or acts rude, when a man bothers a woman like a creep.

In my head i’m so criticizing of other people. And if i’m not criticizing, im acting as if i can read everything about another person. I know this sounds horrible and very narcissistic, but i want to be honest to fix myself. And I know i’m doing this overthinking in social situations to defend myself by acting as if im superior.

But i just observe, i never interact. I havent talked to a single person in my class in university, since im a few years older (24 in a room of 21yo people). Even though i know if i want to socialize thats the right place. I start thinking: if i talk to them, they will get to know me, they will find that i failed or that i dont have a lot of my shit together, and then i will be judged. So why bother. And i know that its so flimsy and stupid. I only made one friend in my old uni before changing courses.

This is not only at university btw. I dont go out in the evenings, or try to meet new people, because i literally have no fucking idea of how to do it without looking like a misfit. My old friends are all very distant now, and while I know many people everything I never really dated, and while i have this insane void of emotional intimacy, i keep rationalising every attempt of experiencing life. I live in a shell.

And the fact i haven’t dated and i’m 24, is so scary. I’m not even ugly or that uninteresting or without hobbies, because people told me the opposite many times, but i dont know why i cant come out of my shell. This is not only about dating, but in general. Im always distant emotionally and end up thinking about it instead of living it. Because im a grown man scared of being judged for my smiles,tears and my love.

I think i have some trauma issues from my teens, when i talked to a girl on facebook for 2 years listening to her problems because i liked her, without ever approaching her irl (because i was a scared teenager idk why). It was a one way thing. I was basically her diary in human form. When i told her my feelings it was too late. After that i ended in a 1 yr depression, and it definitely marked me as a person. I never really opened myself emotionally with anyone else after. Maybe this is not even trauma, it actually feels demeaning to call it as such when other people have suffered more.

This post is a mess. Maybe im just overthinking, and you’ll probably read this and think i need therapy and/or im mistyped . But I really want to break these chains, and hearing an insight from someone who understand people very well could help.

------------------------

If I understand correctly, the main problem is you are closed off and unable to open up. It sounds like you are very afraid of socializing, most likely because you are afraid of being hurt by other people's negative judgments of you (it is a common problem related to unhealthy Fe). There are several factors that may be contributing to this problem:

- Low Self-Worth: You exhibit oversensitivity that arises from using other people's judgments to define your identity and/or determine your personal worth. If you're always worried about how you're being perceived, then you will of course feel anxious about interacting with anyone you're unsure about. This makes it very difficult to meet new people and expand your social circle.

- "Mindreading": You presume to know what others think, without any evidence, easily jumping straight to the worst case scenario. This is a defense mechanism that gives you a false sense of control, as though you're preparing yourself for the worst to happen. As such, you manage to talk yourself out of socializing, losing every opportunity to learn and grow socially.

- Unresolved Past: You've had negative relationship experiences in the past. When you don't resolve negative feelings, learn the right lessons from them, and consciously put the past behind you, you will take the past and project it into the future, expecting it to happen again. This means you are out of touch with reality because you never treat people as NEW people and give them the benefit of the doubt. You assume that people are out to hurt you and you build walls of protection, which conveniently prevents anyone from knowing you and getting close enough to want a relationship with you.

- Lack of Social Skills: It's hard to feel confident when you're incompetent. Even if you were to work up the courage to meet new people, it sounds like you would still lack the skills required to develop the relationship. Immature INFJs often suffer in relationships because of unrealistic ideas and/or unreasonable expectations, which is often related to faulty reasoning patterns (Ti loop). Social skills are called "skills" because anyone can learn and improve them. If you care about being a better version of yourself, you have to be honest about your deficits and apply yourself to learn the knowledge and skills that you need to move forward in life. See the recommended books on the resources page.

While it's possible to work on these issues on your own, it's the more difficult path to take. When you have a serious problem like social anxiety that prevents you from living the life you hope to live, then, yes, it is best to reach out for professional expertise and assistance. People aren't born knowing everything, so everyone needs help at some point and there is no shame in getting it. As long as you keep trying to convince yourself that your needs don't matter or that your problems aren't as serious or serious enough to warrant attention, you will continue to dig your own grave of unhappiness. How long do you want to go through life with these problems weighing you down and holding you back?

[aureusfemme]

hiii, my name is adia i go by she/ her. i made this blog for loa ( LAW OF ASSUMPTION ONLY!! ) i am also here to give & take advice, share success stories and just enjoy and live life to the fullest yk!

sharing my dream/ passions/loves bc why not🤭

sammy ingram~ i loooove sammy ingram sm! i’ve known about loa since middle school but i never really got into it until 2020. i learned about loa from my mom but she wasn’t very serious about it either at the time. i would see angel signs and be like ohh an angel number but never really knew what they meant nor did i really care. in 2020- a few months ago i had SO MANY limited beliefs. i would script and nothing I MEAN NOTHING!!! would ever happen i literally have books full of manifestations that never happened and so i gave up on loa( law of attraction at the time) i believed in having to let go in order to get your manifestations and that was very hard for me so i gave up and even when i did that nothing came. at the end of october this year, i came across manifestion and got really serious about it bc i was going through some shit ok😭. so i knew about sammy ingram since last year but only watched a few of her videos bc i didn’t really care to. i came across her page again in october( i TRULY believe that this was a message from my higher self. i got a youtube notification and it was sammy. i literally forgot all about her i haven’t watched her in a year at the time) i started watching her videos I MEAN BINGING and i got obsessed with her. sammy really really helped me get rid of my limiting beliefs and is also the reason why i’m so serious about manifesting today. she teaches loa ( law of assumption )

affirmations~ as i said in the previous paragraph😭 i used to script and nothing would ever happen. i knew about affs before sammy but i never really used them, and so when i found sammy again i started saying affirmations daily AND GIRL WHEN I TELL YOU MY LIFE CHANGED i started living my best life with the affimations i also did ( and still do sometimes ) honey placebos. i would say “ this honey will help sweeten my day and help me have a good/ wonderful day” something along the lines of that and they really worked!!

subliminals i only really listen to subliminals from time to time. i’ve known about subliminals since 2020. i came across one on my recommendations on youtube and got obsessed. the only results from subliminals were physical things such as; getting prettier, attention like getting hoes and stuff😭 and boobs. also for some reason in the beginning of 2021 (i think) i wanted to be skinny bc i was a little thick and i listened to subliminals for it but then i changed my mind and a little after i stopped listening i lost A LOT of weight😭 also i was obsessed with getting my boobs smaller and they definitely did get smaller but not as small as i wanted but i had a lot of limited beliefs at the time so that plays a part in why but then i stopped caring and stopped listening.

what im working on atm

void state- i knew about the void and shifting since like 2020. i tried to shift a few times in 2020, got really close but never actually shifted and so i stopped caring. i also haven’t shifted or tried since because i don’t care for it. this year i came across the void again bc of tumblr and decided i wanna do it. so i’ve been working on the void for about a week and a few days now. i’ve been really close to entering each time i tried but i had problems focusing and keeping my body still for a good amount of time. so i decided to take a break. about two days ago i came across @fleurlx ‘s (correct me if im wrong) void challenge. basically in the challenge you pick a date to enter the void and you cannot procrastinate or change the date. then up until the date you picked you say void affimations you can use however many you want but i chose one which is “i enter the void instantly” and if i feel myself being negative or anxious i just tell myself the void is easy because i am the void ( i know that itself is an aff but i don’t say it when i’m affirming ) so i’m affirming robotically ( got that from sammy😜 ) and today is the date i set to enter the void wish me luck lmao ( y’all don’t have to bc imma enter anyway🤭 )

self concept- there’s not really much to this just getting rid of negativity and doubts ( which i have none🤞🏾 ) also confidence, just been telling myself i’m gorgeous with and without makeup and i am the star in any room i stand in plus more but not as much.

that is the end it might be long lmao but if you stayed and read all of this love you boo👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏾

looking to build a community of bad bitches and gods/ goddesses ofc!! everyone is welcome to share their stories/ advice and ask for mine.

love, aureusfemme <3

[treesap-blogs]

GUYS IM SORRY THIS REVIEW IS GOING UP LATE you’ll eventually see why lmao! “Cemetery Boys” by Aiden Thomas review!

Hello, Tumblrians! Because I’m trying to make sure practically all of my Goodreads finished books are covered here, there’s an overwhelmingly high number of reviews that are going to be published this week! Sorry :(! BUT!!! At least my reading queue is being cleared up for the end of the month (which you can attribute to me just wanting to be orderly but is actually related to the release of The Wicked Bargain by Gabe Cole Novoa)(who was?? In the acknowledgements for this book actually?? Are the authors friends or something?). Broskis I was so excited for Cemetery Boys because I’ve been wanting to read it for YEARS!!! It was one of the first queer books I ever heard about, actually! And it will always have a special place in my heart because it’s the first time I’ve read a book with a trans protagonist. (I’m non-binary and also genderfluid, because a few times the trans male label could apply, and I’ve identified as some flavor of lesbian for a while although I’ve just been using the label “queer” for a while. Fits my gender better.) 

Also HOLY SHIT i just realized!! This is my tenth Tumblr Review guys :D!! Wow! Very happy to be writing one about a book I adored! To celebrate this milestone, take some art I made of these two! It’s singlehandedly the reason why this review took so long to put up lmao, it’s almost midnight where I am but it’s probably not Saturday anymore for a lot of people on Tumblr up at this hour and with similar time zones as I. Gonna be honest, I was considering redrawing when Julian asked Yadriel if he could kiss him (in Spanish!!!)(read the book and you’d know why that’s a big deal lmao), but I watched an Instagram reel and featured in it was a very realistic piece of fanart of when the two were kinda just lovingly spending time sitting ontop the car and looking at the sunset by the side of the road! Inspiration just struck.

I’m hoping to post art on a more consistent basis in here, hopefully y’all enjoy the piece in this review! (Perhaps I’ll do this with every 10 book milestone?) (if I don’t like the book and don’t want to make fanart maybe I’ll just draw a different one or my OCs lol)

Anyhow! I absolutely ate up, devoured even, cried on, and threw up this book when I read it. Whilst some might not be a fan of the short time frame the romance happens in (it..took some adjusting for me to be honest), I was still absolutely emotional over Yadriel and Julian oh my goodness. They’re so sweet with each other!! WAUGH. I was anxious for a devastating ending most of the time, but wherever my heart was broken, it was healed with some of Yadriel’s brujx magic by the time I’d finished reading. (So corny I know but SHUSH.) The “last day” chapter/scene in the book also just radiated comfort haha. (Perhaps I’m biased though, as I tend to feel in colors and around this point I had enough of an emotional attachment to form the “nostalgic nighttime blues with a light yellow and orange-yellow haze feeling. Which I shall always associate with the smell of a well-kept hotel room now, thanks to the location I finished this book.) Julian opening up eventually, and his immediate acceptance of Yadriel was also very sweet. They were overall very sweet, even if the circumstances they were in meant that they made very “hormonal teen” decisions at times. It didn’t feel like a product of bad writing lmao I’m sure that was intentional.

Yadriel was also a spectacular example of authentic transmasculine representation. I was delighted to read a sentence that mentioned a binder, resonated with his experiences of gender dysphoria, and although he faces a lot of struggle to be seen as who he is within his family, that was handled with care. I also loved the different Latine cultures present in the families in the book, there were different touches added to Dia De Muertos and it brought a very home-y feel to some of the atmosphere of the book. (Saying “some of” because the other parts of the story are horror of course sjkskjbdfbk) On all fronts, the representation was great :).

Also, if the story seems interesting to you based on the premise, but you don’t really enjoy horror, keep in mind that the stuff in this is pretty tame! There’s a few gnarly details, like (slight spoilers) an attempted human sacrifice towards the end, and of course some of the spirits turning “maligno”(conjugent for “malignant”, they become corrupted before they’re forced to leave the surface world, your standard horror elements stuff ensues), but that’s about it. While spirits/ghosts and the existence of what’s technically witches in this realm means that it belongs under the horror category, at least I as a reader thought it fit more just under the paranormal genre. The only other horror book I’ve read on here is The Witchery, and I’d say it’s a teensy bit more spooky than that on the scale? All I have to say for that.

Anyhow! Last thing I feel like talking about is that I liked how the theme of death was handled throughout the book? In several ways, our characters were trying to find closure and there’s multiple very realistic depictions of grief. I’m kinda running out of rambling juice here, so I don’t have much else to add, but it was interesting to see the different facets of loss(I would elaborate on all of them, but I don’t feel like typing up a Spoiler Segment here and it would probably contain mild to moderate spoilers if I did that without warning). It made this a melancholy read, in my opinion.

Overall! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐/5 stars, no doubt :D! (the third book on here to be given a 5-star rating, there to join When The Angels Left The Old Country by Sacha Lamb and The Lesbiana’s Guide To Catholic School by Sonora Reyes!)

Paz, signing off!

(Book trigger/content warnings: Misgendering/deadnaming, mentions of transphobia, mentions of deportation, some instances of experienced racism, grief(loss of a parent), blood and body horror.)

[sleevesareforlosers]

happy solstice jordan!! one thing i’m looking forward to for the new year that i’m also kind of terrified about is graduating and finally being done with school! i’m anxious about finding work but i think once i’ve got everything smoothed out and in place i’ll be really happy post-grad!

something i’m bringing forward from this year is the work i’ve put into my art, i really want to keep experimenting and pushing myself and not just letting myself get into a rut. i’ve been experiencing a lot of self-doubt this year with my art especially but i’m proud of the way i’ve been managing my time and the challenges i’ve faced so i want to bring that energy with me into 2023 :}

the weather here has been clear and sunny but pretty cold the last few days! right now it’s like 11 pm and it’s about 30 degrees F outside, so that’s like. -1C? during the day it’s more like 35-40 F. i don’t really care much for the cold so i comment on it every time i go outside BUT it’s still nice and it’s given me a chance to wear my new winter coat which is a very cute puffer jacket!

if i could be anywhere right now i think i would still pick to be home :) one of the things i’m most nervous about with moving out on my own is not being in my home where i’m comfortable and have all my stuff with me the way i like it but mostly about not being around my family so i’m enjoying spending as much time as possible living at home during the breaks and being around pretzel and my parents and siblings. also once i move my friends who live around here aren’t going to be as readily available though others will be so there’s that as well 🤔

definitely i am a serial rewatcher/listener/reader! i like the things i’m comfy with and it’s hard for me to go outside of my comfort zone and experience new things with media especially. i reread a lot of books and i rewatch youtube videos and movies and music. especially shows, i really don’t watch a lot of tv, and when i do watch tv i have a tendency to put on old shows that i’m comfortable with. i make exceptions for star wars shows but that’s it and aside from the mandalorian and andor sw has been very disappointing lately so that’s been tough. i think the one thing that may be an exception is music! while i like relistening to all my favorite bands over and over and over on loop i also really enjoy the experience of finding new music that i enjoy and playing that over and over also :)

i hope you’re having a wonderful day danny i love u!! 💝💝💝

pretzel says hello as well 💕

[ID: a fluffy golden puppy dog lying on a tan corduroy couch, looking into the camera with his paws tucked up. end ID]

happy day after solstice love!! enjoy a longer day today than yesterday

!!!! wah thats so exciting. i cant believe ive known you like. long enough to see you do your entire degree im SO excited + proud of you and im wishing you ALL the best w your postgrad stuff!!

YES its been very clear in the art ive seen that you're putting so much effort into it and its absolutely paying off. cannot WAIT to see where you go from here! ik self doubt is a bitch but you rly are so talented i hope you can keep up your energy w it into the new year and beyond

OUGH! chilly! im glad you have a nice new jacket to keep you all toasty esp if you dont rlly like the cold. and i hope you've got as much hot chocolate as you want to warm up w when you get back inside! ive been drinking sooooo much hot chocolate recently its life changing esp when its cold out

wah thats so sweet. i absolutely understand moving out can be SO intimidating but i hope when you do end up moving you find a place that you can make yours and be just as comfy there as you are at your parents place. and in the meantime! enjoy the being home! give pretzel a BIG BIG kiss for me im saying hello back to him and givin him a good scratch

this answer does NOT surprise me at all and props on being the first person to come down firmly on one side or the other. esp w tv i totally get that <- has been rewatching supernatural unfortunately. its so much more of a time commitment and esp with shows that are just coming out its like. you want a decent payoff for your time + energy investment. like w star wars shows i was SO excited for bobf and then. well. i think i watched like two episodes and then the Thing Happened and i was like 'yeah im not finishing this' but i have heard SUCH good stuff about andor and its done coming out for this season so i just need to sit down n actually watch it.

its nice that new music is easy for you its SUCH a delight to find new music you actually like so im glad that you get to have that!!! anything specific thats been in your playlists recently?

i DID have a wonderful day yesterday i hope you have a good one today!! love youuuu

[renewingagain]

sunday 9th october 2022 // 4:44pm

once again it’s been quite a while since i’ve journaled lol. i really need to do this more often as it’s quite an effective way for me to check myself, work out whats going on with me internally, and also help me work out things like where my life is headed, sort out my future, establish goals and things like that

but i say this everytime i journal, and then leave it a good few months before i get back to it 🤣

anyway, i started off with this post by actually reading a few of my previous entries just to assess how my life has been the past year, what my feelings have been like throughout, and to then compare to how im doing now

considering that the last year or two of my life have genuinely been some of the hardest years i’ve been through, i’m actually doing pretty well in this latter half of 2022

the past couple of years in a nutshell i’ve had to face

- the shittiness of covid and the impact it had on my life during and after uni

- releasing myself from the chains of religion

- thus dealing with religious trauma

- to then finding myself again and discovering my sexuality properly

- having my first relationship and losing my first relationship

- my self-esteem issues

- physical abuse from another dumbass boy (not my relationship)

- generally being an adult in sheffield

theres probably more to this list but its a general rundown so far. the beginning of 2022 was also really difficult in particular, as this was when i had my breakup as well as moved house, turned 25, faced performance issues with my job and was just generally anxious all the time

to be fair, im still anxious to this day and i’m always fretting about where my life is going. but i seem to be managing it much better than usual

and within this latter half of 2022, i seem to be doing really well and have been living more carefree about things!

first, the break up. it was obviously really hard at that time, and sometimes to this day i do still find myself thinking about alex. it really is a shame that we had to break up for the reasons we did, alas it was necessary. the first 2 or 3 months were extremely difficult, there was always this inner turmoil of wondering whether i had made the right decision. but i know now that i did, and time is a healer. now im fine with it all and wish him all the best of course. i have realised that there will always be a part of me that does love him, i dont know why that is, but its there, i acknowledge it and thats just that and that’s fine! it does make me sad that we don’t talk anymore, but if he is safe and well then so am i :)

the few months after this have just consisted of getting into dating again but also just generally exploring my sexuality! and within that i have been having a pretty good amount of sex. a bit tmi but i had my first threesome(s) this year. they both happened in the same week, both unplanned, and with different people! it was pretty wild but i enjoyed it and it’s definitely something i would do again

these days i am feeling much more comfortable in just being gay and acknowledging it. i went to my first prides this year <3 chesterfield, leeds, and then manchester. had sooooo much fun with them each time and it really made me feel proud about who i am. i know not to be ashamed of this

i went to amsterdam for a weekend in september with kiran and kajal which was so much fun, and i’ve now just spent the past couple weeks in london seeing lots of friends and family. it’s been a really great month! (i’m currently writing this entry on the train as i head back to sheffield now) 

now i’m just at a stage in my life where i need to work out what i want to do and where i want to go. i have a lot to think about.

when i was in london, my massi said i can essentially move in with them once they have finished doing up their house if i find a job down here. could london be the next step in my life?

i’m approaching 25 now and i really want to just have some more direction and feel settled in life. london in particular is probably the best place to be for opportunity. even seeing veena down there, she sent me a job recommendation for where she works and would put in a referral for me if i decide to apply for it. and i’m like why not!

as much as i love sheffield with all my heart, i’m starting to get a little tired of it now and would like something new. i came with the intention of just getting away from home so i had the space to think about where my life is going. and now i’ve had that space and clarity and i have an idea of what i want to do in life now. i know it’s tech.

furthermore, london would be so good for music too. so there really is a lot to think about. i would dearly miss my friends in sheffield, the connections i have there, my best friend sam, my little gay group i have. but otherwise, there isn’t really anything holding me back there. i’m not tied to anyone there in a relationship, and my job there at the HO is boring and something i dont really want. [i am now being promoted tho so thats fun woo]

task: check out that job posting that veena sent and similar 

i also really want to start working on my fitness and health again. i need to get back into it properly, it is important. i want to drink less and start waking up early again and look after myself.

also, i really need to get off my phone and do more things. learn more, go outside, read a book

now that the winter is approaching, it is adamant i stick to this rather than consistent mindless scrolling on tiktok or wherever. i need to look after myself again, meditation is key too.

i need to get back on my learning and development too. if i want to get into tech then i have to put in the work.

also, doing this will greatly benefit my mental health, thus ensuring i am happy, content, and the best me i can be for myself and for other people. i’m tired of having days where i just feel a bit crap. i know they are normal, but lately i am feeling generally better and hopefully this will continue to be on the up.

i also need to learn to transform any space i am in so i can just learn to be content. rather than having my set place, i wanna learn to be content and continue doing what i do at all times.

with regards to my mental health, i’m hoping these ashwagandha supplements i have ordered start to take effect in order for me to feel more focussed and less anxious

tasks:

- start waking up early

- turn off your phone. just literally turn it off and don’t think about it

- start running again and working out. just do it as and when you can. even a 10min run is better than doing nothing. this same logic applies to anything, 10min of studying is better than nothing

- do some proper, consistent, thorough research on where things are going to go and for where you want to go in life. do this alongside your studying and keep dreaming

- make a physical vision board that you can refer to at any time. you certainly have the space for it

enjoy your life, rest, and go easy on yourself. you’re doing amazing sweetie. and go easy on your self-esteem too. someone will love you for exactly who you are. someone has before, and someone will again. you’ll find that person you can just vibe with.

love yourself

[buckysimp101]

Deleted Scene 2- Love at First Grade (18+)

drabble warnings: fluff. that’s all. oh it’s so sticky sweet

request: the wedddinnggg???? omg avery and becca would be so adorable with excitement (here’s the ask)

a/n: you asked, now i’m delivering! hope y’all enjoy this lil drabble of their wedding 

Series Masterlist

“Becca, Avery. For the last time the two of you need to sit still so these nice ladies can finish your hair.”

“Yes, Nanaaaaaaaaa,” the two feisty eight and nine year olds spoke sweetly in unison as they batted their eyes at Winnie. Winnie merely cut her eyes at the two, trying to figure out if they would actually listen this time, before walking away. Avery and Becca giggled as the ladies rushing around the room trying to finish up last minute hair and makeup barely paid them any mind as they wrapped up with the girls.

“Psssst, Avery. Mama said we can get candy if we’re good….and I think we’ve been good…wanna go find some candy?” Becca whispered as if not to catch the attention of the adults in the room. You were sitting in the chair now, being doted on by Winnifred and your mother as the cosmetologists finished working on your hair and makeup, Bex, Wanda and Natasha oohing over your dress in the corner. The girls were alone, relatively speaking, for the first time all day.

Avery pressed her lips together, trying to think if she had actually been good or if she just wanted candy, but the latter thought won out by convincing her of the former. The wedding was another hour away, not that the two girls had any way of telling time nor were they about to ask. So they did what relatively unsupervised children do, they snuck out the open door. Becca and Avery giggled when they realized none of the adults had even seen them leave, as they took off down the hallway in bare feet and matching pajamas. The first door they found was the bathroom, but it was the fanciest bathroom either of them had ever set foot in. Gilded mirrors and fancy tile had the girls dancing and singing like they were in a Barbie Princess movie. It only took a few minutes of goofing off before they remembered the task at hand, and they left the fancy bathroom behind in search of candy.

A few more doors, a few storage closets, another bathroom. Still no luck. When they rounded the corner and found the stair well, they decided they might as well check the other floors. One floor and four tested doors later the girls were in for a surprise. But it wasn’t candy. No. It was…

“UNCLE STEVE!?”

“Becca…Avery…what are you two doing down here?” Steve questioned from where he sat in the suite, obviously confused and concerned as to why the two girls were wandering around the venue on their own. His question didn’t have time to be answered however because the door to the bathroom was opening up and revealing a very anxious ball of energy, concerned as hell about his tie and if it was the right length or not.

“Steve, I swear for the life of my I can’t remember if this tie is supposed to be this long, or if it’s supposed to be shorter. The dimple looks like it’s off-center, I look a me-,” Bucky rambled, still not noticing the girls until they released their twin shrieks like a banshee call.

“DADDY!!!!!!!!!” “PAPA!!!!!!!” Becca and Avery squealed as their eyes landed on Bucky in his suit. His attention was grabbed immediately, but before he could even ask the girls how they’d gotten there they were running full speed and flinging themselves into his arms. 

“You look so handsome!” “We haven’t seen you all day!” “Mama looks beautiful, did you know that!?” On and on the girls squealed and rambled until Bucky could finally find the words he was looking for.

“You know it’s so good to see you girls, and wow do you both look so pretty with your hair all nice and ready…but…you’re not in your dresses…and there’s no adult here besides Uncle Stevie…how did you end up here?” Bucky questioned so as not to sound angry but at least the slightest bit concerned. The giggles stopped almost immediately as the girls realized their search for candy was likely at an end. Neither of them answered Bucky, but their silence was answer enough. He let out a sigh and squeezed the girls tight before heading into the bathroom for his phone. As he was about to call his mother, he was receiving one from her instead.

“Hey ma,” Bucky started but was immediately cut off by his mother’s frantic voice going on and on about the girls and not being able to find him, but Bucky was able to calm her down as he let her know that he had them safe and sound if she wanted to come pick them up and get them ready. At the sound that the girls had been found, it was like everyone on his mother’s side of the phone call let out a deep breath as she thanked him and promised to send Bex to pick them up. After hanging up the phone, Bucky looked down at Becca and Avery but each of them were offering him a small look of wide eyes and sad faces.

“Girls, you scared your mama and Nana and Grammies and all your aunties. Wanna tell me what you were doing walking around the place by yourself and not telling anyone where you were going?” 

Avery spoke up, “we were just looking for candy, Papa. All the ladies were done with us and mama said if we were good we would get candy.” Her voice wobbled a little bit and Bucky knew that she was seconds from crying at the stress and fear they’d accidentally given everyone today, Becca, meanwhile, merely nodded her head in agreement but refused to make eye contact with Bucky. Heaving out another sigh, he pulled the girls close and made them promise to apologize to you the second they got back in their room. And that they wouldn’t get candy for this because of their actions; however, he did promise them cake if they behaved the rest of the day. And everybody knows that cake trumps candy all the time.

When Bex arrived to pick up the girls she also told them how much their disappearance scared everyone and how you were on the verge of tears when you had looked around, and they were nowhere to be seen. Both Becca and Avery’s lips wobbled that time, Bucky could tell they didn’t like the idea that they had upset you, so he sent them off with Bex to apologize and get ready for the wedding.

When the girls arrive back in the room you wrapped them each into a tight hug. You apologized to them for not paying as much attention to them this morning and they apologized for leaving without telling an adult where they were going or what they wanted. Not much longer and everyone was dressed, the girls were calling you a princess, and you were walking down an aisle scattered with flowers, your father on your arm guiding you toward your husband. The moment Bucky laid eyes on you his world stopped. His heart thudded dangerously loud in his ears, his eyes pricked hot with tears, and his mouth had a mind of its own as it damn near dropped to the floor at the sight of you. One tear dropped from his eyes, then two, then three. Until Bucky was being nudged in the side by Steve, offering him a handkerchief and a smirk that said “I-told-you-so.” When your hand was put in his, Bucky felt his heart soar and when you were proclaimed husband and wife, he claimed your lips in a heated kiss, a few wolf whistles thrown out by Tony and Sam and twin “ewes!” By the girls were the only things pulling him back to the present. The glint in your eye was proof that he’d have more of that later on.

The reception went off without a hitch. The girls behaved wonderfully the rest of the night and got the first slices of cake. As the night wore on and bedtime slowly crept upon them, they got more clingy. Throughout the night the girls had gone from dancing with the two of you, to dancing with Steve and Sam, to Sam and Nat, to Morgan Stark. Towards the end, the four of you danced slowly with Avery and Becca both in Bucky’s arms, enclosed in a little huddle as you all swayed to the music. The girls’ eyes were getting heavier and you both knew it was almost time to send them on to bed with Grammie. Becca provided you with a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek as she sighed, “I love you, mama” and Avery did the same to Bucky. The little pieces of affection enough to make you want a million more kids. 

When the kids and the grandparents left the music turned a little more…inappropriate and so did the dancing. Eventually, the music wound down once more and a few more slow songs played for the night to end. Bucky was holding you tight, singing along to the words of the song talking about love and the future, his lips brushing against your ear and sending bolts of electricity through your body. When you looked into his eyes, they were sparkling with happiness. He bent down to capture your lips in a kiss, slow and languid. Sweet and soft with a hint of a promise of what was to come. When he broke the kiss, Bucky looked like he was about to say something but your attention was pulled to something just over his shoulder. Your eyes widened and you damn near poked a hole through his chest to get him to focus on something else.

“You think he finally wisened up and asked her!?” you whispered in excitement, pulling Bucky’s attention to the other side of the dance floor where Wanda and Steve danced closely to one another, their eyes completely locked on their partner and nobody else in the room. Bucky snorted in response, the day Steve Rogers ever bucked up the courage to talk a pretty girl into dancing with him was the day that pigs would fly.

“Come on, you know it was Wanda that did that. Steve gets flustered just by being in her general vicinity,” Bucky teased, making you giggle in response. Wanda had been flirting with Steve ever since that night at Obsidian, and Steve had…tried to flirt back a number of times. But it didn’t matter how often Steve crashed and burned in his attempts with Wanda, she always found them endearing, a promise she’d made to you multiple times over the years. Wanda’s crush on Steve had only grown as the years passed, and so had Steve’s crush on Wanda. At every possible moment, you and Bucky and Sam had schemed to get the two of them more…involved. It seemed that a wedding was just the push they needed.

“Mmmm, well I hope he realizes sooner rather than later that she likes him just as much as he likes her. They look so happy together,” you sighed dreamily, resting your head on Bucky’s chest as he continued to sway the two of you to the music. 

“Hmm, and what about you, Mrs. Barnes? Are you happy?” Bucky teased, using your married name for the first time since the officiant declared it so. 

In response, you lifted your head from Bucky’s chest, a small grin growing on your lips, as you pressed them deeply to his. Only breaking the kiss long enough to whisper against his lips, “Immensely so, Mr. Barnes."

taglist:

@youlightmeupfinn

@la-undercover-latina

@jackiehollanderr

@fab-notfat

@galaxy-dusk

@asoftie4bucky

@fangirlvoice

@queenbeecandi*

@babyevansblog

@stevihj

@sherlockstrangewolf

@notavintagecliche

@justsomebodyweird

@katiecg

@wintasssoldier

@snufflet

@buckrecs

@missvelvetsstuff

@selluequestrian

@dhoruwolfie

@winters1917

@crazyunsexycool

@fangirling-galore

@emmarablack13

@some-lovely-day

@the-fool-who-jingled

@theluvcafe

@crazybutconfidentaf

@juulle987

@lucylaufeyson3

@i-need-mental-help-today

@gloriouspurpose01

@iridescent-vixen

@mochie85

@enchantedbarnes

@beclovescatz

[rainyraeken]

A Tumultuous Saga- T. Raeken

pairing- Theo Raeken x fem!Stilinski!reader

summary- Theo is brought back from hell, but only starts an inner hell within you

warnings- angst angst angst

word count-1.3k

a/n- After 2050 day hiatus on this account, I finally caught up with Teen Wolf. I have strong feelings and needed to express them somehow. Binge watching TW the last few weeks has made me become hyper fixated again. Also I have became deeply invested in the lil psycho wolf boi chimera just as much as I was when I first saw him in S5 where I left off 4 years ago. Might turn this into a mini series, right now this is just for my enjoyment and my first time writing in 4 years as well. I’m a bit rusty. As I re watched, I wanted to explore a trope with a Stilinski reader (im the worst alright?). Kinda the typical theme with most imagines for Theo, but I’M A SUCKER FOR IT OK!! I hope you enjoy! Credit to gif owner!

“Hello,” you called out as you stepped into Scott McCall’s house. None of your friends had talked to you all day, making you concerned since as of lately they’ve been extra protective of you. Not leaving you by yourself for longer than necessary since the Ghost Riders have been in town. You heard all the voices from the living room cease when you spoke up. 

Scott and Liam shuffled into the entrance of his home. “Y/n? What are you doing?” Scott asked nervously. Liam had the same look on his face as well.

“Yeah Y/n, you shouldn’t be here.” Liam groaned as Scott threw an elbow into his side a little too hard. You looked between the two curiously, almost amused if they weren’t being so weird.

“Why so secretive? First I can’t even go to the bathroom without Hayden or Malia guarding the door, now I’m not allowed to know what’s going on?” You tried to walk further into the house, but Scott grabbed the sides of your arms keeping you secure.

“Or how about Hayden or Malia, can you meet you at your house?” He suggested. You raised an eyebrow, now he was being really strange.

“Or,” you drawled out, “can you tell me what’s going on? I’ve been through everything with you Scott now you’re keeping secrets from me.” Irritation laced through your tone as you ripped your arms out of Scott’s grasp. “Besides my dad’s home tonight from the station and my mom’s home too.” You made a point to take a step into the house more to solidify that you weren’t budging. “Let me at least talk to Hayden.” You walked towards the threshold of the living room.

Before you could get into the room, Hayden appeared in the doorway, “what’s up?” You looked at her, “can you tell me what’s going on?” You asked the younger girl knowing she could usually spill the beans easily with a little persuasion. She started to stammer, “Y/n I would love to but now isn’t a great time.” You had enough.

You charged at her, a groan of annoyance from you. You plowed through her arms, despite her werewolf strength. You ignored the three werewolve’s protests. “I’m sick of the secrets, everyone wants me in their business, but now what’s-” You stopped as you entered the living room. 

You couldn’t believe who was sitting on the floor, bloodied and battered. “We tried to warn you.” Hayden said, anxious of your reaction. Theo Raeken back from hell? You glanced at everyone almost dumbfounded. “This is a joke right?” You laughed in disbelief. 

“He knows who Stiles is Y/n, no ones happy about it, but we need him right now.” Scott tried to reassure you.

Theo looked remorseful as he stared at you. You fought so hard for him, believing he was good. Ignoring your friends, arguing for hours with them all for him. He killed your best friend, poisoned and lied to your father, and he had you fooled that he cared about you. He looked like he had seen better days, good he deserves it, one side of you said. The other side of you thought how handsome he still was, with his hair longer and his enticing blue eyes. You had been in denial, that the other side of you was hoping he was brainwashed from the Dread Doctors, and if he had a choice he wouldn’t have done what he had. You knew you couldn’t believe that either, but the look on your face mirrored Theos for a second before it was replaced with anger. 

“We could’ve figured out who Stiles is without him!” You roared. Though you were only human, your emotion frightened all the pack. You were always calm and thoughtful, the mom friend of the pack. Caring, compassionate, and giving everyone the benefit of the doubt despite what you went through. Which is why you think Theo used you thinking you were just naive. You were angry and scornful, at him and regretfully yourself. You didn’t want to deal with your morality on top of the Ghost Riders. 

“Unfortunately, y/n darling, you do.” Theo adjusted himself, wincing in pain. The way he looked physically, was how you felt for most the past few months emotionally. 

“Don’t call me that!” “Don’t call her that!” Your voice echoed with Scott’s, Liam’s, and Malia’s. The wounded male held his hands up in defense. “Tough crowd, I get it. It’s obvious you don't remember who Stiles is to you, Y/n. I don’t think anybody realizes, and that is why you need me.” He had a smug tone as he stood up slowly. Of course he did, once again he knew something nobody else knew. That’s always how he had the upper hand.

You rolled your eyes, “can you get to your point, Raeken?” Theo quickly erased the smugness off his face. He now had a worried look on his face, and he glanced over to Scott almost as if he wanted the alpha to save him from this conversation. Did Scott know something too?

“I don’t think it’s a good time, Y/n.” Your heart wrenched at Theo’s voice. It was soft and was the tone he had used with you before you knew of his deceitfulness. The one he reserved for you when you two were alone. Late nights when he would sneak in your bedroom when your dad was stuck at the station, and your mom was fast asleep. You two would giggle about stupid things, as if nothing was wrong and your life wasn’t in danger. Or Scott had Theo and you research so you’d spend hours sitting in his truck, rereading the Dread Doctors looking for hints. When you’d yawn from the boring novel, he’d then drive to the drive thru and buy you a late night snack just as an excuse to prolong his time with you. You now knew it was all for you to be fooled since you were one of the most easy going of the pack. He had to play you the most. At least that was the conclusion you came up with, during the last three months of trying to heal.

“Well,” your voice cracked, everything was getting the best of you at this point. “I don’t think any time will be a good time. I don’t want any interaction with you, Theo. When you're ready to tell, tell Scott.” You sniffed trying your best to keep your composure. Theo went to walk towards you, but Malia pushed him back back snarling. Everyone knew the history between you two, when you were kids, when he came back (much to their displeasure that you had to be attached to the psychopathic werewolf), and now another chapter to the Y/n Stilinski and Theo Raeken tumultuous saga. Everyone watched you with sad weary eyes as you stormed out the front door, and got into your car.

Theo was a bad guy, and as selfish as he was— in his own messed up way, deep down in his cold heart; there was a soft spot just for you. He always deep down coincidentally kept you out his shenanigans. Even though often you’d walk blindly into the chaos, typical Stilinski fashion. Then, he’d dig himself more of a hole with the lies whether it was to protect you or his ulterior motive. 

He could smell your chemo signals from outside Scott’s house and hear you crying. He was going to do what it takes to keep himself above ground, and for forgiveness. He didn’t care if it wasn’t from the rest of the pack, he only cared if it was forgiveness from you.

[tarosin]

the great adventures of y/n tommy tubbo jack and ranboo - how y/n made friends with everyone

this is an extra to the great adventures series

requested: yes/no

warnings: cursing

tommy

you were actually friends with tommy when he was streaming to a few viewers, and you even watched as his channel grew. eventually he asked you to mod for him, as he knew he could trust you and because had experience being a twitch mod. he was also the reason you began streaming. as for how you met, you were in the same classes as him in highschool, and since you were the ‘quiet’ person in the class, they sat tommy next to you. honestly, you hated him when you first met him and the feeling was mutual. you didn’t want to sit next to the rather loud teenager and he had no one to talk to anymore as his friends were on the other side of the room.

“do you ever talk?”

“heh?”

“i said do you ever talk...do you always do that”

“do what”

“that fucking HeH.”

“are you mocking me simons?”

“noooo why would i do that...”

“it’s y/n.”

“right, yeah, yeah, i totally knew that.”

“great now please leave me alone i’m trying to work.”

“loser.”

“the fuck did you just say?”

“nothing.”

it was that moment tommy decided he was going to make you just like him, and a few years later that’s exactly what he did. by year 11 you and tommy had grown extremely close. the last day of school arrived a lot earlier than expected, everyone was extremely stressed, no one knew what to expect or what was going to happen. you found yourself hanging around with tommy a lot more as you had no idea if you would both be going to the same college, in september you received a text message that made your night:

tommy: college sent out emails telling you if you were accepted go check

*2 minutes later*

tommy: well?

y/n: i got accepted

tommy: me too

y/n: call me right now

tommy: i’m about to stream..have you ever considered streaming?

y/n: absolutely not

tommy: make an account and stream after me i’ll raid you..make me mod you know how people can be

once college started up, you were slightly nervous the two of you would drift away from each other. however this was far from the case, although you both did different subjects and he was only in on wednesdays, the pair of you would hang out together a lot more. he would be in your streams and vice versa, you would either be in his tiktoks, or you would be the one filming them.

“y/n make a tiktok we can be mutuals.”

“please god no.”

you spent so much time at his house either talking about random things, playing whatever game you could find, or streaming. he dragged you to every meet up he went on, allowing you to meet people such as niki, phil, and, wilbur. you didn’t know this, but he would constantly bring you up in conversations with dream, which eventually lead to you joining the smp in october where you would later be able to meet the likes of jack, technoblade and jschlatt. the only person you didn’t seem to see on the server was his other friend tubbo.

ranboo

you had become friends with scott after being his first twitch mod and when he noticed you started streaming, he was extremely supportive, always raiding your stream once he ended his. today you found yourself bickering with scott because he wouldn’t let you in mcc despite the fact you were ‘the best minecraft player.’

“y/n, i watched you die in minecraft 7 times last night within 5 minutes.”

“oh i’m sorry mr perfect, let me in mcc.”

“no.”

“fine i’ll make my own.”

and that’s exactly what you did..well you tried your best.

you started your stream as soon as scott ended and had him call you on discord after explaining to your chat what you were about to do.

“scott final chance let me in mcc, i’ll settle for access to the practice server.”

“fine.”

“REALLY?!”

“absolutely not!”

“fuck you, ill be in it one day!”

you left the call telling chat you didn’t need that negative energy in your life.

you really have scott to thank for you making friends with ranboo, scott made a tweet explaining what you were doing on stream which caught ranboos eye.

Smajor1995: after not making it into mcc again my good friend @y/n has decided to take it upon themselves to make their own on stream!! ill also be in the stream (if they answer my calls) *twitch link*

ranboo joined your stream and was instantly met with you yelling at scott (again) to let you in mcc.

“IM YOUR TWITCH MOD!”

“i will ban you from mcc!”

“you don’t have the nerve... so he left the call this is bullshit watch me land this water bucket clutch down this ravine so we can find axolotls and build an army.”

*you died*

you pulled your hood over your face before sinking down your chair taking a deep breath.

“FUCK!”

you calmly got back up and looked into your camera.

“i was so close, so very close.. HEY CHAT SCOTT SENT ME A LINK TO THE SERVER!”

a few minutes later you were able to get onto the server, only to be kicked less than a minute later. the reason you were banned being ‘i watched you fail the water bucket clutch down a ravine.’

you continued your build on your server and just spent the rest of the stream talking about anything that crossed your mind, that was until you decided to copy ace race. once finished, you looked into your camera and pulled your microphone closer to you.

“so this is race ace, so scott doesn’t sue me, and basically it’s going to be this course, but i’m going to change a random section practice it every day, not tell anyone it changed. of course i’m going to tell my team we have to win, oh fuck i forgot scott was watching my stream..it’s okay he didn’t hear me he’s too busy planning how he can rig the next mcc.”

ranboo found himself enjoying your content and even noticed you in his chat multiple times.

“just a minute chat i’m just sending an important dm to my mods.”

that’s when you noticed chat paused for a minute after you sent a message, it confused you for a minute before realising ranboo made you a vip on his channel and you decided to do the same for him on your channel, from there you added each other on discord. the pair of you made friends extremely quickly, you were constantly part of his streams as you would call him on discord not realising that he was streaming.

“hi y/n, by the way i’m streaming”

“i just wanted to ask if you knew how to break into a house?”

“....why”

“i locked myself out by accident and my parents are asleep come help me.”

“you are in the uk.”

“okay? catch a flight.”

chat honestly loved you and your friendship with ranboo. the pair of you only met a few weeks ago and you were already acting as though you had known each other for years.

jack

you and jack met for the first time on the smp, which would have been fine, however you met during lore and your characters weren’t exactly the best of friends. once lore had ended, everyone said their goodbyes and left the call. a few moments later you received a discord message from jack asking if you were available to call any time soon. since you were back in lockdown, you had plenty of free time. you arranged a time and date a few days later you called jack, where you had your first proper interaction out of character.

“hello jack!!”

“oh hi y/n i just thought it may be a good idea to get to know each other, well you know considering we’re both on the dream smp.”

“yeah, yeah, i understand what you mean.”

the pair of you ended up getting along with each other, it was slightly awkward for the first 5 minutes of the call, but that was expected since you hadn’t really met jack before and were anxious to call him. however, after that the conversation started to flow and you found out the pair of you had a lot in common making it easy to come up with things to talk about. it ended up feeling as though you were catching up with a friend you hadn’t spoken to for a while.

“has anyone told you your accent is really strong.”

“so is yours, y/n, what the fuck is that supposed to mean.”

“it means your accent is strong, duh.”

jack asked if you’d like to stay in call and join him on the smp whilst he streamed, and you gladly accepted the offer as you really didn’t want to do your college work, and you were enjoying your time with him. a few minutes into the stream jack had killed you several times.

“JACK STOP KILLING ME!”

rather than answering you he just sat laughing. he then went on to attempt to mute him microphone, he failed. however he didn’t realise this, so you sat listening to his plan on how he was going to kill you again. this time you were prepared, you sent a message to tommy telling him to log on along with your location. few minutes later tommy was by your side and helped you kill jack several times for revenge.

“Y/N...TOMMY!!”

“you didn’t mute your mic, so i told tommy you were bullying me.”

“im gonna go...BYE JACK, BYE Y/N, ILL SEE YOU SOON!”

“i can’t believe you.”

“hey you’re the one who didn’t turn your mic off.”

“how did you know?”

“i had your stream on my other monitor.”

“ayeee you watch my streams?”

“...i’ve been a sub for 4 months.”

the two of you stayed chatting and playing for another hour. the pair of you were already so close and you had only met each other the other day. this was just the start of your friendship, soon enough you were in a laugh and the stream ends challenge on his stream, however due to lockdown rules this was done over discord leading to you accidentally leaving the call several times.

“and they’re gone again!”

*4 minutes later*

“SORRY JACK IM BACK!”

“stop leaving y/n!”

“oh i’m sorry, let me just go yell at my wifi to stop cutting out!”

a few seconds later you could be heard faintly in the background screaming at your wifi as it would continue to buffer. as soon as restrictions were over one of the first things you decided to do was go to jacks and stream a laugh you lose where there was a punishment if you were responsible for losing the last heart. however everything was apparently hilarious in person as you would constantly laugh, meaning you were responsible for losing the last heart.

“y/n give me your phone.”

“no.”

“you lost let me tweet from your account”

“fine..”

soon enough your fans and friends with your notifications on received this twitter notification

“y/n: jack is so cool and funny he is also really tall i am not”

tubbo

tubbo was actually the last person you met and made friends with, your community were convinced for some reason that you both didn’t like each other and that’s why the pair of you didn’t talk to each other. this was far from the case you were both waiting for the right time, tubbo was an extremely busy teenager and you didn’t want to interrupt him, and tubbo knew you were currently in a stressful position since you had recently joined the dream smp, also you were still meeting people so he didn’t want to stress you out. this doesn’t mean he didn’t want to be your friend, he actually asked tommy since he had been your friend for at least 4 years what would be the best way of getting to know you.

“mate they hated me when we first met, just talk to them or something. you could have met them the last time i went up to visit you, but they ended up not feeling too good and went back to the hotel room.”

“when are you next coming up?”

“how about next week, and i’ll bring y/n, i really don’t understand why you’re nervous tubbo, it’s y/n they wouldn’t hurt a fly..well hmm.”

“see you next week then!”

a week later tommy dragged you to the train station.

“uh tommy where are we going?”

“...on a train.”

“no way, really? oh my god!”

a few hours later you finally got off the train.

“ill go with my dad to check into the hotel room, do you want to come with us or?”

“i think i’ll go for a walk and stretch my legs.”

“right okay, meet you at the beach later”

you spent a few minutes walking around the beach picking up any rocks and shells that caught your eye, little did you know it would result in you meeting tubbo. once you finished putting your new collection in your pockets you noticed a small crowd of people walk up to someone asking for pictures assuming it was tommy you walked over to the boy, it wasn’t tommy it was in fact tubbo. at first you stayed silent not wanting to really cause attention to yourself. you only spoke up when some people started to make inappropriate comments towards him.

“oh sorry to be a pain guys me and tubbo have plans with tommy in a few minutes, we should go so we’re not late. bye guys.”

you smiled and waved as they walked away. you looked over to tubbo, you could tell he was still pretty anxious about what just happened and honestly if you was in his position, you would react the same way.

“we should probably move from here incase they come back and see you’re still here, are you okay?”

“im feeling better now it’s over..thank you”

“oh it’s no problem i’m, y/n btw.”

“wait you and tommy were still meant to be on the train.”

“the train was actually on time, tommy went to check into the hotel i wanted to stretch my legs, i also wanted to collect some rocks.”

“did you collect enough or did you want more?”

“im not going to say no if you wanna go collect some with me.”

the pair of you walked around keeping each other close incase the people from before returned. half an hour later, the pair of you sat on a bench close to the beach so you could show tubbo everything you decided to pick up, he ended up keeping a rock he liked to have as a memory. tubbo wrapped an arm around you as it was getting cold whilst you watched the sunset.

“tubbo i think tommy forgot about me.”

“you can spend the night at mine, i’ll send him a message to let him know.”

“are you sure?”

“of course!”

“this has to be the most unsafe thing either of us will ever do, we hardly know each other and now i’m staying at yours.”

tommy sent you a message explaining that he didn’t forget, there was a problem at the other hotel and they had to go find another one, but you’ll be fine to stay at tubbos for the night. the pair of you spent the entire night learning as much as you can about the other person. it had only been an evening but you already knew the pair of you would be great friends.

taglist:

@dumb-chaotic-bi-energy @uselesssapphickitten @l0ver0fj0y @etheriaaly @xx-smiley-xx @hawarun @kylobensgirl @cawcaw-pretty-thing @reverse-iak @renleicrashed @c1loudee

[1-800-gaygentsofshield]

you + me = ? | n.r.

summary: after the war you and Natasha settle down, deciding to start a family in your cozy little home. The problem is though, how many times can hope be ignited before it fully burns out?

warnings: (trying to get pregnant) reader, canon/sterile Nat, swearing, Nat and you cry, post-endgame, sprinkle of angst with a very fluffy ending

word count: 4,016

im having baby fever rn im so sorry

-flashback, pre-endgame-

"I wanna have a family." Your voice is barely above a whisper as you both look up at the night sky, laying in the garden atop the Avengers compound. "What?" Nat asks softly, breaking out of her trance as she looks at you. You're laying on her chest and her arm is wrapped your back, Nat's other arm folded up behind her head.

"I wanna have a family, with you." You repeat yourself, making eye contact with your girlfriend as her brows furrow. "Y/n.." Nat's voice is hesitant and panic floods your chest, your eyes widening as you move to sit up. "Oh my god I'm so sorry, that was so quick-" You apologize quickly as you avoid Natasha's gaze, the redhead sitting up with you.

You've dated Natasha for two years but everything has been slow, knowing how the assassin will close herself off if you try and move too fast (emotion wise).

"Hey Y/n no." Nat says softly as she looks at your side profile, a soft frown forming on her face as she sees you. "That's not the reason why." She says as she gently turns your head to face her, fingertips delicately grabbing your chin. "I do want to have a family with you, moya lyubov'..it's just that I can't." Nat whispers and you finally lock eyes with her, seeing the pain and sadness on her face. "What do you mean?' You ask carefully and she sighs, waiting a beat before deciding to tell you. "In the Red Room me and all of my other group mates were sterilized..it was like a sick graduation ceremony that prevented us from having a family of our own." She tells you and hurt immediately grips at your heart, seeing Nat avert her gaze for a moment.

"Why?" You question and she purses her lips together, one of your hands rubbing her knee gently. "So we would never have any distraction from our mission..so that our only purpose in life was to kill and be used as a weapon." Disgust drips from Nat's voice at the last part, your soft hands on her wrist bringing her back to reality. "Im so sorry Nat, I shouldn't have anything I didn't know-" You start to apologize again but Nat stops you with a soft shake of her head, a bittersweet smile on her face. "Don't apologize, Y/n. I'm the one who should be sorry for not being able to give you the family that you deserve." She says and now it's your turn to shake your head, grabbing Nat's hands and caressing them gently. "Its alright baby." You smile gently before an idea pops into your head, your eyes lighting up and Nat gives you a look of curiosity.

"Besides.." You start, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "If you really..truly..wanted a family with me, there could still be other options. Like adopting or getting a surrogate..or I could get pregnant instead." You suggest and Natasha's eyes light up like the stars in the night sky, a small laugh escaping your lips as you see the excitement on her face.

"Really?! You'd do that?" She asks and you nod your head, giving your girlfriend a soft kiss before laughing. "Mmhm, but you'd have to put a ring on it first, Miss Romanoff." You giggle and Nat wraps her arms around you again, both of you laying back down on the blanket. "Im planning to, future Mrs.Romanoff."

-present day, post-endgame-

You nervously pace around the bathroom as you wait for the three minutes to be up, Natasha sitting on the edge of the bathtub and observing you walk back and forth. The pregnancy test is laying by the sink and you can’t help but glance at it every few seconds, not having felt this nervous since battling Thanos and his army. You’ve faced gods, powerful Titans, super soldiers, but you’re sure this the most nerve wracking thing you’ve ever had to do. Once the timer on Natasha’s phone goes off, you practically jump towards the sink, Natasha leaning forward a bit more on the bathtub. Picking up the white and pink pregnancy test, you nervously turn it over in your hands, eyes scanning the small window for the results.

Natasha doesn’t even have to ask for the results when she sees your shoulders slump and your face drop, quickly getting up from the bathtub to wrap you up in her arms. Hugging you from behind, she can see the negative test in your hands, gently kissing your cheek when you don’t say anything. “It’s okay baby, we can try again.” She says softly and you shake your head, slowly placing the test down and closing your eyes.

“Nat, what if somethings wrong with me?” You whisper and her arms hug you closer, tears pooling under your eyelids in frustration. “Nothing is wrong with you malysh.” Natasha reassures you and you turn in her arms, releasing a shaky breath as you press your face into her neck. “Three times Nat..three fucking times..” You sigh and she only holds you closer, knowing how much hope the both of you had for this one. “I know, I know.” Nat hums softly as she rocks the two of you back and forth gently, feeling the hope starting to dwindle from you. “What if we just weren’t meant to have a biological children? What if we weren’t meant to have lives after the war?” You question out loud and Natasha pulls back, gently tilting your chin up so you can look her in the eyes. “Hey no, don’t say that. We were meant to have a family Y/n, biological or not.” Nat takes a pause to brush some hair out of your face.

“Let’s try one more time, okay? And if that doesn’t work then we can look into other options.” She continues and you think for a moment, not knowing if you could go through the hope and pain again. “Okay.” You whisper softly and Nat nods her head. “Okay.” She echos you before placing a gentle kiss on your forehead, pulling you back in for a hug.

————

Nat’s leg is bouncing up and down as she watches the timer tick down, only ten more seconds before you can check. This is the last try, all or nothing. You’re too anxious to pace this time, instead opting to sit next to Natasha and leaning into her as you watch her leg bounce. “You know..whatever happens, I love you.” Nat says softly when she sees you blankly stare at her knee, lost in thought about what’s going to happen. “I love you too.” You reply equally as soft as you look up at your wife, grabbing her hand and intertwining them slowly.

Leaning into each other, you both share a soft kiss, love shining through the small interaction. You both only pull away when the timer dings, Natasha rubbing your back as you sigh and get up. It feels like time slows down as you walk towards the sink, heart pounding in your chest as you reach out to grab the test. The bathroom is silent as you pick it up and flip it over, looking at the little window for the results. You’re silent as you look at the results, body frozen in place as you stare at the test. Natasha’s brows furrow and she gets up, sighing as she rubs her temples.

“Baby I’m so sorry-” “It’s positive.” You interrupt Nat midway through her sentence, your voice in disbelief as you see those two pink lines. “What?” Natasha asks, unsure if she heard you right. “It’s positive.” You repeat as you turn to face her, pregnancy test in hand as you smile from ear to ear. “You’re pregnant?” Natasha asks, almost in disbelief as she stares at you. “I’m pregnant.” You nod your head and Natasha immediately sweeps you up in her arms, hugging you right and picking you up from the ground. “Holy shit! We’re gonna have a baby!” Nat laughs as she spins you around, joyful giggles falling from your lips as you cling onto your wife.

“Oh my god we’re gonna have a baby.” Nat breathes out as she comes to a stop, quickly putting you down once the realization hits her brain. “Shit, you’re pregnant we need to be careful.” She says and you only laugh, pulling her down a bit to kiss her. “You don’t need to be that a careful dummy, but yes..I’m pregnant.”

————

“Tony gave us an iron man onesie.” You laugh as you hold up the tiny piece of clothing, Natasha grinning as she watches you. Even though the announcement was made a week ago, the gifts have been steadily pouring in, Tony insisting that he pays for the majority of the things that are needed for the new arrival.

He paid for the crib, the high chair, the car seat, most of the nursery, and all the bottles and toys a newborn could ask for. Pepper had a huge part in it too, having experience since bringing Morgan into the world. “That man is self centered.” Natasha laughs as she walks over to where you’re sitting, her heart full of love as she kneels down next to you.

“Mmhm.” You hum in agreement as you fold the article of clothing away, Natasha handing you the next gift. You’re about sixteen weeks along and you’re already showing, a small baby bump forming from your midsection. You both decided to wait until the second trimester to tell the rest of the team, wanting to enjoy the first few months in peace.

Natasha watches you wordlessly as you open a gift from Steve, a smile tugging on her lips as she sees the captain america pacifier. “I love you so much.” She blurts out randomly and your head turns to face her, a smile on your face as you gently kiss her.

“You’ve gone soft Romanoff.” You tease and she only laughs, gently kissing you again. “I blame you, you’ve made me domestic.” She grins and you roll your eyes, placing the gift to the side.

————

As the pregnancy goes along, you start to notice Natasha’s lack of touch, the redhead only going as far as running her hands through your hair or holding your shoulders. You have no idea what has gotten into her and you're determined to investigate, missing the way Natasha used to spoon and cuddle you all day.

Your questions were finally answered when one day you and Natasha were watching TV in bed, the redhead's arm slung around your shoulder as you lean into her. When the commercial break finally came on, you turned your head to look at your wife, curiosity written all over your face. "Why don't you cuddle me anymore, Nat?" You ask softly and she looks at you with confusion, lowering down the volume on the TV. "What do you mean? I cuddle you all the time baby." She says and you shake your head, reaching up and gently toying with her hair.

"Ever since I've gotten pregnant you've treated me like I could break at any moment, what are you so afraid of?" You question and Natasha sighs, glancing at her lap for a moment before answering. "With these hands I've done some awful things Y/n..things too horrific to say out loud. I feel like if I touch you or the baby I'll just ruin it, or hurt you..like everything else in my life." Nat confesses softly and your heart melts at how scared your wife is, knowing how much she's struggled with her past and with the red in her ledger. "Natasha Romanoff." You whisper, gently grabbing her hands to put them in between the two of you. "You are the kindest," You start, gently kissing her knuckle. "Most caring." another kiss, "Most selfless" another kiss, "Person I've ever met" another kiss. "And I know, with my whole heart and soul, you would never do anything to hurt me or the baby." You look up at her and gently rub your knuckles over the back of her hands. "So please stop acting like you will. These are the hands that I love, the hands that will raise our child, they're strong and secure, so stop thinking otherwise." You finish as you wordlessly move both your hands towards your belly, gently placing Natasha's hands over the bump.

The redhead is stunned as your hands rest over hers, the baby suddenly kicking. A wide smile spreads across your face as you both look down at your belly, the baby never having kicked before. "That was the first time they've ever kicked." You inform Natasha and you could see her still processing that fact. "That's our baby?" She asks softly and you laugh, nodding your head. "Mmhm, that's our baby. They recognized their mama." You say fondly as the baby kicks again, Natasha's heart bursting with warmth as she looks at you.

Slowly, Natasha moves to lay down on the bed, resting her head right beside your bump and holding it gently. "Hi malen'kiy golub'." She whispers softly, your hand coming down to gently play with her hair. You smile as you watch Natasha gently cuddle with your bump, knowing without a doubt that she's going to be a great mother.

-----

Placing the stuffed animals down on the table, you turn to look at Natasha, a giggle coming from your lips as you walk over to her. "What?" Nat grins as she turns to face you, putting the paintbrush down to the side.

"You're a mess." You laugh as you rub some pastel green paint from her cheek, both of you deciding that the nursery would be painted a light grey with a pastel green accent wall. "I'm still hot though." She teases and you only roll your eyes, cupping her face as you gently kiss her.

"Yeah yeah you're always hot." You laugh and Natasha looks around the room, grinning at the stack of Avenger's themed stuffed animals your team gave you. "They're all trying to be known as the cool uncle aren't they?" She asks softly and you nod your head, knowing that whatever Avenger your child takes after will forever have that bragging right.

"Let them have their fun, they're happy for us." You smile and Nat only sighs, shaking her head with a small smile on her face.

-----

You feel like Natasha was more anxious than you when you went into labour, your water breaking in the middle of the night. There wasn't any dramatic screaming or freaking out, you just calmly pushed the sheet back and let out a soft "huh" as you saw the damp bedsheets.

"Oh, okay we're doing this." You say before turning on the light, acting like it was any other day as you gently shake Natasha awake. "Nat, baby wake up." You whisper softly as Natasha stirs, squinting at the light once her eyes opened. "Y/n? What's wrong?" Nat mumbles sleepily as she rubs the sleep from her eyes, seeing you in a sitting up position.

"My water broke." You say and it takes a second for the words to process in Natasha's brain, the redhead suddenly sitting up and fully awake. "What? Okay okay it's happening. It's happening." Nat says as she pushes the sheets off herself, her mind immediately going to all the books she's read over the past nine months. You've already packed your hospital bags a few weeks in advance so you aren't too stressed about it, only needing to change and grab a few extra things. Natasha, on the other hand, is working on full overdrive, pulling on sweatpants and making sure everything is in order.

"Natasha, baby." You say as you gently grab her arm, needing your wife to slow down if you're going to survive the next few days. "You need to calm down my love." You say softly as you hold onto her shoulders, making the redhead look at you and take a few deep breaths. "Okay..okay. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous." Natasha admits and you nod your head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"It's okay to be nervous Nat, you just need so slow down. We haven't even gotten to the hospital yet." You laugh softly and she nods her head, waiting a few more moments before stepping back slowly. "Okay, let's have a baby."

---

Your head is resting back against Natasha's shoulder as she acts like a backrest to you, allowing you to grip onto her hand when your contractions hit. Nat has been nothing but supportive the entire time, humming reassuring words into your ear as the pain washes over your body.

"Fuck." You whimper once another round of contractions end, Natasha's hand coming up to gently push back the sweaty hairs sticking to your forehead. "You're doing amazing baby, I'm so proud of you." She hums and you sigh, closing your eyes as you feel your wife rub your back. It's quiet as you feel Natasha's hands move down to your bump, rubbing your stomach softly as she sighs.

"Come on malen'kiy golub, your mommies are so excited to meet you." Nat coos and you smile into her neck, warmth flooding your chest as you listen to her. "And I know all of your aunties and uncles are excited to meet you too. We're so excited to hug you, and kiss you, and watch you grow." She hums as she rubs small circles on your belly.

"So please come out before your mommy kills me." Both of you laugh and you snuggle more into Natasha's embrace. "You're going to be an amazing mom." You whisper and Nat grins, looking at you with a quirked eyebrow. "Yeah?" She asks and you nod your head. "Yeah..I couldn't have asked for a more amazing wife, best friend, and now..a mother to our daughter." You hum and Nat blushes, kissing you gently.

----

Your eyebrows furrow as you grip onto Natasha’s hand, pain coursing through your body as you deliver the baby. “You’re doing amazing y/n, almost there.” Nat says as you practically crush her hand, hiding the pain in her face as she watches you. "Congratulations, it's a healthy baby girl." The doctor announces as the baby's cries fill the room, your chest heaving as you lay back. Nat cuts the umbilical cord ("I've seen worst in Budapest") and they place the baby on your chest, draping a blanket over the two of you to keep you warm.

"Hi baby." You coo as you hold your child close to your chest, Natasha standing next to you with unshed tears in her eyes. You look up at her and sniffle (you're crying so hard at this point) as you see the look of awe on her face, smiling as you gently reach out to grab her hand. Softly placing her hand atop of the baby's blanketed back, she slowly moves her thumb, the child's cries quieting at both of her mother's touch. Nat is speechless as she watches the tiny newborn cling onto your chest, loving the warmth radiating off of your body.

"She's a boob man, just like her mama." Nat whispers and you laugh, that being the first thing that comes to her mind. Your child's hand slowly comes up and wraps her fingers around Natasha's thumb, that being the breaking point for the tears as they finally fall down her cheek.

----

"Are you gonna hold her or are you just going to stare at me?" You ask as Natasha watches you and Mila sit on the bed, the two of you now alone with your child. Natasha looks hesitant as she walks over to you, never feeling so nervous as you look up at her.

"You aren't going to break her Nat." You say and Nat's eyebrows furrow, seeing the tiny infant look up at her with Y/c/e. The baby took from both you and Natasha, having scarlet red hair from her and beautiful y/c/e from you. "I just don't know..I mean what if I drop her? What if I do something wrong?" Nat worries her bottom lip between her teeth and you only beckon her to come closer, scooting over so she can sit on the hospital bed.

"You won't Nat, I promise." You reassure her and she slowly sits down on the bed, following your instructions as she places her hands out. Gently transferring the baby into her arms, you smile as Mila looks up at her mama, letting out a soft "gah". "See? She loves you already." You hum as you rub Mila's hair gently, seeing the love on Natasha's face. "Hi Mila." Nat breathes out as you rest your head on her shoulder, watching your wife interact with the baby. The tears return to Natasha's eyes as the newborn looks up at her, her emotions going everywhere as she processes that this is her child, her little bundle of joy that she gets the privilege of sharing with you. "Thank you." Nat whispers out as she looks at you, a smile on her face as she sniffles.

"For what?" You question and she only kisses you softly, smile still on her face as she pulls away. "For giving me another reason to live for." She whispers and her statement covers a wide range, thank you for being her wife, thank you for giving her a chance, thank you for her daughter, thank you for giving her the family she's always wanted, just thank you.

----

Mila's cries ring out through your room and pierce your eardrums, rousing you and Nat from your slumber.

"Mm, I've got it." You sleepily mumble out of instinct as you start to get up, now used to getting woken up in the dead of night.

Mila still doesn't have a sleep schedule since she's a newborn so sometime's she'll sleep for a few hours and other times only for ten minutes.

This time around though, you get gently pushed back onto the bed by Natasha, feeling a comforting kiss placed on your temple as your wife gets up. "I've got it, moya lyubov'." She whispers and you don't have enough energy to resist, watching as Nat walks over to the bassinet. "Hi malen'kiy golub, you have a healthy set of lungs don't you?" Nat mumbles sleepily as she pulls the newborn from the crib, cradling the baby to her chest and gently rocking her back and forth. "Yeah I know, it's okay baby. It's okay, mama's got you." She hums as the baby's cries slowly die down, you still sitting on the bed as you watch your wife in awe. "Your mommies need their sleep huh little one, that sounds nice doesn't it." Nat yawns and you cant help but smile.

"But don't worry, every time you wake up we'll be here okay? We'll love you and hug you each time you cry. And I'm gonna protect you, malen'kiy golub. I won't let anything happen to you or your mommy, I promise." Natasha coos as she continues to rock Mila, not noticing how you're wide awake now. It's a soft, quiet vow, spoken in the dead of night, that Natasha will protect her family with everything she has in her..and it makes you fall more in love with her, if that's even possible.

Getting up, you make your way over to your wife, gently placing your hands on her shoulders to notify her of your presence. She knew you were coming as soon as she heard the bedsheets rustle, even in her tired state she was looking out for the two of you. "Hi." Nat greets you softly and you only hum, a tired smile on your face as you rest your head on her shoulder. Your hand comes up and is gently placed on Mila's back, rubbing soft circles on her onesie. Natasha's heart swells as she looks at her small family, smiling when you kiss her cheek. "I love you." You whisper before looking down at your daughter. "And I love you too." You hum, gently kissing her fiery red hair. Nat kisses your temple gently and closes her eyes, finally at peace with her daughter in her arms and you at her side.

[suitofvibraniumarmor]

Ficmas #6: Holiday Travel

Yes, I did again steal and tweak my own drabble. But I hope you'll all enjoy it just the same.

The road stretched out ahead of Chris’s car, taunting the both of you with all of the side street options it gave for you to turn onto. You swallowed hard before biting your bottom lip.

“So … where’s our turn, babe?” Chris asked, slowing down between every side street so he wasn’t making some crazy sharp turn and cutting off traffic -- especially with the slush and snow icing the roads.

“Well, let’s see … if this is Parkdale …” Actually, you had no idea where to go after that.

Chris frowned. “You’re lost, aren’t you?”

“No,” you said, shaking your head adamantly. “They’ve just, you know, moved the streets around since the last time I was home eight years ago.”

“I thought you said you knew where you were going!” Chris said, pulling into the first parking lot that he found.

You got out of the car and slammed the door. “Yeah, well, I lied!”

Stomping off in the direction of you-didn’t-know-where, you heard the driver’s door slam as well, and a few moments later, Chris grabbed you by the arm.

“What gives, Y/N? This was supposed to be a nice trip for me to meet your family at Christmas. Now we’re fighting over navigation?”

Your shoulders slumped. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. Like I said, I haven’t been home in eight years. I had a huge fight with my mom and — I’ve seen them, they’ve come with my brother to visit me, but being back here, it’s like the last hole to patch. I’m nervous and terrified and the last thing I want is for some new argument to start while you’re here.”

Chris hugged you tight. “No family is perfect — they fight. And, you know, if I’m going to be a part of your life for as long as I want to be, they’ll be my family too someday.”

Your jaw went slack as you leaned back so you could look Rob in the eye. “Chris — are you — you’re saying you want to be with me for that long?”

Chris chuckled and kissed the tip of your nose. “Darlin’, I’m saying that if this trip goes well and your dad gives me his blessing, I’m going to marry you — hopefully sooner, rather than later.”

He chuckled again at the shocked expression on your face as he made way back to the car. In somewhat of a daze, you follow him, now more anxious than ever about the trip.

AllOfTheThings: @captain-s-rogers @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @hurricanerin @im-not-an-armrest-im-short @shynara51 @sea040561 @pinknerdpanda @xtina2191 @beakami @heartsaved @fullprunerebelstatesman @blackwidowismyhomegirl @averyrogers83 @jennmurawski13 @connie326

[lovely-jily]

almost caught

something for @jilytoberfest! prompt: "if we get caught-" "i'll make it worth your while, i promise."

i wrote this quickly and didn't revise it a ton, but im just excited to contribute for jilytober!!! hope you lovely's like:)

"Okay, James. I'm going to be completely frank here- and I wholeheartedly mean every word when I say this- this is perhaps the stupidest idea you've ever had- and you've had loads of stupid idea's."

"Oh, come on. Try to have some faith in me," James whispered back, opening one of the drawers of the desk. They were in the Ravenclaw Prefect's office. James had suspected that the Prefects were somehow involved with their Quidditch team cheating by using weighted and magic-infused balls. The only evidence he had to back his theory up was a "gut feeling" and the fact that the bludgers seemed to target the other team more often, which Lily chalked up to confirmation bias. While she disagreed with cheating, she figured a better idea was to talk to their Prefects, not snoop through their office.

"Famous last words," Lily rolled her eyes, "I can't believe that I let you drag me into this. If we get caught-"

"I'll make it worth your while, I promise," The boy reassured her as he looked up at Lily, messy dark curls hanging in front of his eyes. He had finished looking in the first drawer and moved to the one below it, quickly searching. Lily wasn't sure what he meant by that, "Besides, we won't get caught. Now, are you going to start searching, or are you going to make me do all the work like usual?"

"Like usual? Excuse me?" Lily said. She was standing in front of him, hands firmly planted on her hips disapprovingly before turning to the cabinets. Besides breaking his collarbone last night in a quidditch game (Which Madam Pomfrey fixed just fine, and if he followed her instructions, he'd be totally healed in days), the year was going swimmingly for James and Lily. She enjoyed working with him as Heads and was seeing real change in him. He was no longer a bully, and in fact, he always shut that sort of thing down.

"I don't even know what I'm looking for."

James just chuckled as he closed the second drawer, kneeling to search the third drawer, "Probably anything quidditch related."

"You've got the wrong person for this," Lily sighed. That was probably true. She knew nothing of sports- both muggle and wizard alike. She turned to the cabinets on the far wall, which was full of books, mostly student records, and smelled musty.

"You know, this would be so much easier if you just agreed to use the cloak with me," James commented as he stood up and brushed off his pants. Lily had grown to like him over the past few months and didn't mind working with him as co-Heads. He was kind, responsible, and enthusiastic enough that almost everyone adored him- even Lily. She was even starting to get butterflies around him, something she never thought could happen.

"I'm never going under that damn cloak with you," Lily said as she took out a book of student records. She dusted it off and then put it back where she found it.

"Never is a strong word," James said as he walked over to the wardrobe. He opened it up and stepped inside, pressing against the back of it to see if any secret openings were on the back wall.

"I know," Lily said, following him and standing behind him, "That's why I said it."

That's when they heard the door handle jiggle, indicating that someone was trying to come in.

Lily, panicking, looked up at James. He quickly grabbed her by her waist and lifted her into the broom closet, quietly slamming the door. One hand was on her waist, the other over her mouth to try and keep her quiet. He gently took it off and put it behind her head. One hand was still on her waist as he tangled his other in her hair.

Fucking hell, he was hot.

Lily's hands were holding tightly at the bottom hem of her skirt. She knew that if she didn't plant them there, they'd undoubtedly find themselves tangled in James's dark locks.

"Maybe you were right about that cloak," Lily whispered as they were both breathing heavily and pressed up against each other. She wondered if he could feel how hard her heart was beating. She wasn't sure if that was from fear of getting caught or being so close to James.

James just brought his finger back to her lips and shushed her softly. His breath was softly blowing on her bangs, which caused them to tickle her forehead. All Lily could do was look up at him, remembering what was going on outside the cabinet, hearing the door open. He then anxiously looked out through the crack of the wooden doors, trying to watch whoever she heard come in. Lily tried to ignore the way he was clenching his jaw. She noticed that was a sort of nervous tick of his, something that he did when anxious. One hand was still on her waist, the other resting on her hair on the nape of her neck.

Why was she caring more about James's hands on her than she did at the idea of getting caught?

"Weird, I swore I heard voices," Sabrina Wood, the sixth year Prefect, said.

"So did I," Robert Thomas responded.

James, seeming to spot something above Lily's head, quickly reached his hand up. However, he never got to inspect what he wanted to. Lily heard the sound of his collarbone crack, implying that it was rebroken. While Madam Pomfrey had patched him up just fine, she said he needed to refrain from sudden movements of reaching above his head. Lily now realized this was why.

James leaned forward and grimaced in pain. Still on Lily's neck, his hand grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled at it slightly.

"Fuck," He groaned quietly in Lily's ear, and she felt his hot breath against her ear and neck. Her eyes widened at how attractive that word was coming from his lips, silently cursing herself at the sinful thoughts that flashed in her mind.

The sound of footsteps walking around the office brought Lily back to the current reality. She looked above her see his arm clenched in a fist. He was in a lot of pain.

Wordlessly, she pulled out her wand and pointed it at his broken collarbone. She had practised nonverbal spells a number of times, although never this one. She wasn't sure if she'd ever done this one on a human before.

The footsteps were walking towards the wardrobe and she looked at James. He had relaxed his grip on Lily's hair (much to her disappointment) and moved it to her waist. He nodded slightly, giving her permission to try.

She wordlessly performed the healing charm. James gripped at her shirt in response to the painful snap of bone back in place, just as they heard Robert say something about how they needed to get back to their rounds. They heard the two leave and the door close, listening to the charm the Prefects performed to lock the door. Once they determined they were alone, James let out another groan as he brought his hand down from above Lily's head.

"Good girl," He exhaled as he melted into her, and Lily's eyes widened again. That should not make her feel the way it did, but regardless her toes crinkled and she tightened her grip on her wand.

"You alright?" She asked sheepishly, trying to relax. She was feeling bashful and disappointed that they now had to exit the wardrobe.

James, slightly sweaty from the pain, nodded and raised his other arm to what he wanted to look at earlier. He pressed against the wall, and a hidden drawer slightly popped out. He reached his hand in and pulled out a piece of parchment from inside it.

"Lumos," he said, still breathing heavily. The room lit up, and Lily looked at James, light reflecting on his glasses. He was looking so damn good, skin sticky and lips soft. She fought against the image of something else that could make James groan, sweat, and breathe heavily.

They both looked at the parchment, and written in neat handwriting was "For those who forget, use wingardium leviosa to control replaced quaffles."

James looked up at Lily, a victorious smirk on his face, which Lily couldn't help but smile at.

"God damn it," Lily said, annoyed that he was but also influenced by his contagious smile, "You actually were right."

"We did it, Evans," James said excitedly, putting his hands on her face and shaking it with enthusiasm.

Lily laughed, blushing at his hand placement, "For Ravenclaws, they really are thick. That was way too easy to find."

James shrugged and dropped his hands, "I don't really care too much. We'll take this right to McGonagall. She'll sort this whole thing out."

Lily nodded as he opened the wardrobe door, feeling the cooler air hit their skin. She blinked at the sudden brightness as he helped her out.

"I can't believe you could do that spell so well, and wordlessly too! You never fail to astonish me with your brilliance," James ruffled her hair with his empty hand and pocketed the parchment with his other.

Lily, blushing harder, smiled at him, "Says the idiot who rebroke his collarbone."

"True," James just laughed, putting his hand on Lily's back to push her forward. He then put both hands on her shoulder and shook them back and forth as he guided her out of the door of the office and down the corridor, "What would I do without you, Evans? My saviour."

Lily just laughed as she shrugged off his hands, playfully pushing him. She looked up at him, his hands clasped behind his back and glasses peering down at her.

"Probably walk around with a broken collarbone."

"Of course," He looked forward, "I've got a question for you, Miss Evans."

Lily's stomach lurched at that statement, and she bit her lip in anticipation, "Yes?"

He stepped in front of her, stopping her. His hands were still behind his back, and he looked down at her. They were nearly as close as they were in the wardrobe.

"Did you think about kissing me in that wardrobe?"

Shit. Fuck. How did he know??

Her stomach dropped, and while she was taken back from the question, but decided she wasn't too mad about it. So they were doing this now?

Lily, full of panic and anxiety, was determined to remain as calm and collected on the outside as she could. She smirked and tilted her head flirtatiously.

"Maybe. What's it to you?"

James smirked back and stepped back to Lily's side as they started to walk again, "Why didn't you?"

"For starters," Lily said, deciding to remain confident, started to lie, "You had a broken bone and seemed to be in a decent amount of pain."

James scoffed sarcastically, "I don't know what you're talking about. Didn't hurt at all."

"Ah, of course, it didn't," Lily looked at her feet as they walked as she remembered the way that he grabbed at her hair and his tone when he whispered "Fuck" in her ear. She got chills again.

They were heading to McGonagall's office. She wasn't sure how James would explain how he obtained the evidence to McGonagall, but she wasn't thinking about that too much at that point. They were talking about kissing, something much more compelling and appealing to Lily.

"Regardless, and back to the more important thing at hand," He smirked at her as he leaned to whisper in her ear, sending chills up Lily's spine, "Perhaps we can get stuck in another wardrobe soon- and don't hold back next time. I still have to make it up to you for nearly getting caught."