#my novel Breached Containment

[glitched-dawn]

So I have noticed some cool grimblos do in fact notice that I have written funny words and want to read them so uhhh

Imma just post the first chapter here?

Aight here we go: Novel 1 out of 9, Breached Containment, Chapter one: How haven't I seen this cool thing before?

[Warning tho it is really long like 20 A5 pages]

[Also PS if this gets over 100 notes I'll post chapter two]

How haven’t I seen this cool thing before?

Soon I’d literally die from boredom. No offense to my teacher, but since I was used to having biology lessons indoors, maybe doing an experiment or two, this was just a punishment. Walking around in the woods, that I knew inside out, looking for anomalies in fungi.

But this day turned out to be something unusual - something unusual, cool, and potentially, bad.

☙•❧

Me and my friend Rick left our class’s search for mushrooms pretty early (cause who could be interested in mushrooms when they’d already explored almost the entire forest?), and we had special permission to leave and “explore”, which was weird, since we got permission because we knew the forest inside out.

We’d left the school about ten minutes ago, and most of us were enjoying the warm and fresh air. Others (ehm, those who didn’t know forests exist) were just staring at their phones, waiting for the lesson to be over.

Two of our teachers were there with us, our PE and - of course - biology teacher. Our PE teacher, Mr Raminez, a buff bald dude with a blonde beard wearing coaching clothes, walked around trying to push us into doing healthy exercises. And our biology teacher, Brian (he’s such a homie, everybody just calls him Brian), mainly just mingled with students about their grades, about fun and lean lessons he’d have in the future, and about potential future trips like this one, hopefully not in the local forest.

Rick and I didn’t have much to do, except maybe finding a good tree to climb, or maybe doing the exercises Raminez wanted us to do. But since we knew the forest here inside out, there wasn’t anything fun we could do during the trip, if we didn’t sneak away.

I sighed and looked around. The dense forest had all kinds of different trees - it wasn’t just a boring pine one, or a birch one, so on. There was both pine and birch, there were mighty old oaks, clusters of rowan and juniper, and spots with fir and beech. And the whole place was filled with life, even though you couldn’t see it directly.

Squirrels were easy to spot, they didn’t care about being hidden. Then the frogs were everywhere, so that wasn’t a surprise, and you were heavenly lucky if you caught a deer or fox. Unluckily, since there was so much passive wildlife, there were also many predators, like wolves, bears and wolverines, and also the biggest moose I’d ever seen in any forest throughout my life.

I remembered one time, when I was out in my backyard, there was a moose munching on our apples. I ran to my dad, who grabbed his rifle and shot it, because we wouldn’t risk the moose hurting anyone. I hadn’t understood why until later, when Dad told me that a portion of the apples were fermented. The moose tasted good though, and we got to hang its antlers over the fireplace in the living room, which was extremely cool.

Rick shook my shoulders, making me wake up from my zone-out.

‘Oh, what is it?’ I asked him.

‘There’s a gap’, he announced, and I grinned. It was time for some exercise.

☙•❧

As the other students in our class stood bent over one of the most common mushrooms in the forest, that I’d seen at least a couple hundred times, Rick and I took our chance and threw ourselves away from the others in hopes that the teachers would assume that we’d just gone for a quick detour - when in reality, we were running as fast as we could away from the class to gain some free time.

We ran for a few more minutes, until we had to stop so I wouldn’t choke on my laughter.

‘Bro, they didn’t even notice!’ I laughed, stumbling backwards. I hit a tree and leaned against it, to give me something to hold on to as I tried to sip air. Rick was out of breath too, laughing at me.

‘Couldn’t they hear what was happening? Like seriously, we almost threw ourselves down that cliff!’ I fell forwards, and Rick caught me at the last second. I struggled to stand up and I fell again, causing Rick to cough, he was laughing so hard.

When I had finally gotten up and brushed myself off, and when our laughter had subsided somewhat, we took off through the forest again - through shrubbery, glades and brushwood, over fallen trees and narrow streams. It was cloudless and warm outside, and the sun shone in rays through the beautiful arched roof of fresh green leaves. It wasn’t very windy, the most noticeable sound was us walking on leaves and pine needles, and the birds and other animals going about in the distance.

We walked casually, safe and sound, in the direction of the old limestone quarry, where we could take a fresh dip later today. It wasn’t that popular, with the ocean so close by, so we usually had it for ourselves.

But we must’ve walked in a somewhat wrong direction, and we walked for a good fifteen minutes before I realized. I interrupted Rick in the middle of his epic, overly dramatic story about how he beat me in Castle Crashers for the first time (he got to use my most powerful character, and he didn’t let me heal. Sounds unfair to me).

‘Hey, bro, I think we went in the wrong direction’, I cut him off. He stared at me in confusion. Then his eyes lit up in excitement.

‘Well, that doesn’t matter now’, he said quirkily, ‘cause I’ve found something way more interesting!’ He turned around and started running away from me, through a glade filled with thicket, and past a wall of trees.

‘Oh woah, take a look at this, bro!’ Rick shouted to me. I followed up and when I reached Rick, I wasn’t very surprised.

’What? I thought I’d shown you the ravine before’, I said, confused. In front of us, a rip in the earth cut through the dirt and rock below. On the other side of the ravine, there were more coniferous trees than on this side. That place looked pretty dark, and I hadn’t spent much time there. In the bottom of the rave, a small river snaked through the rubble and boulders. It wasn’t really a ravine, it was more of a canyon, but whatever.

Rick frowned and answered; ‘Yeah, yeah, you have, but that’s not what I was talking about-’ he turned around and pointed at something at the line of the horizon -’my bro, you goin’ blind? There’s a building over there!’ I squinted at the spot Rick was pointing at and saw a gray block, and it did look like some sort of building. I regretted not having explored the forest past the ravine.

‘Ey, that’s epic!’ I responded with a smile, ‘But I don’t think we have the time to go get your binoculars.’ Rick nodded.

‘That’s true. And sneaking past the teachers and the other students would be harder than before’, he summed up. I glanced at the building again - it was hard to see what kind of building it could be; but it was easy to foreclose. It obviously wasn’t a normal house you’d live in, not even an apartment building. Maybe it was just an abnormally huge abandoned house, but from the shape and gray color I doubted it; it looked more like concrete, and not many abandoned houses in the forest were made out of concrete.

‘What do you think it is?’ I asked Rick. He squinted at the block just like I did, frowning.

‘It’s pretty hard to tell from this angle and distance, I should really bring my binoculars tomorrow.  But it can’t be a normal house - I’d say that it’s an abandoned factory or something.’ Yeah, that made some sense, but why would it be out in the middle of the forest?

‘Yeah. That’s neat, though. You think we can check it out tomorrow?’ I looked back at Rick. He caught my gaze and smiled quirkily.

‘Time for some urban exploring’, he grinned.

☙•❧

‘I’m home!’ I yelled into the quiet house.

Huh, that’s weird, I thought to myself. There was usually quite a bit of noise here, even when I wasn’t home.

I looked around the empty space. The wooden walls were coloured a light brown, tainted gray. Past the narrow hall I was standing in was the living room, and to my right was the kitchen. To my left were the stairs up to the master bedroom and my room, plus a soundproof room, a little common room and a bathroom.

I heard someone getting up from bed upstairs, and a few moments later my dad came stumbling down the stairs - an averagely tall dude, with mixed ginger-brown, fluffy hair, dressed in an orange flannel shirt and a pair of ripped jeans.

‘Hey buddy! How was school today? I heard you went on a trip to the forest’, he said brightly.

His sky-blue eyes glittered friendly, and his warm smile was extremely contagious. People often told me I looked similar to him, probably because we were both tall, had the same bushy brown hair and lanky posture, but he had many many more laugh lines than me, blue eyes, lighter skin and a warmer face. I had energetic green eyes, a crooked smile, a browner, more coffee-colored hue, and a few faded freckles around my nose. If I’d just been a little taller, we’d almost look like we were the same age. It was magical how he managed to look like an older teen, when he really was 39.

I smiled back and responded; ‘Oh, yeah! Rick and I got a special permission to leave and explore, which is really weird since we’ve already explored a really big part of the forest’, I told him while taking off my shoes and backpack.

‘We did go exploring though, we walked all the way to the ravine and spotted some kind of building on the other side of it. We plan to go see what it is tomorrow - on a distance, of course, with Rick’s binoculars.’ I walked into the kitchen and grabbed two mugs from one of the cabinets. Dad followed me into the kitchen.

‘Oh, by the way, my buddies from work invited me for a fishing trip tomorrow, but we’ll be home by the evening’, he said, grabbing some milk out the fridge, putting it on the counter, and then he grabbed the sugar and cocoa from the pantry.

‘You want some hot chocolate?’ He smiled.

‘Yeah, sure!’ I replied. I got up from my chair and helped him prepare - I put a small saucepan on the stove, and I turned the heat up. As Dad started to cook the heavenly drink, I told him about my day and what plans I had for today. He nodded along, listening, smiling encouragingly.

‘Where are you going, though? The ocean? Along the coast, or out in the big blue?’ Dad nodded.

‘Yep, we’re going fishing in the ocean, out in the endless bright blue! It’s gonna be lit, and my buddies are even going to bring a barbeque with them on the boat!’ I grinned. That sounded awesome!

‘I hope you catch some fish for me’, I said, and Dad smiled back, nodding again.

It was wonderful how happy he still was, considering he’d lost his wife - my mum - just a few years ago. She’d died in a terrorist bombing in a large city we’d lived in, and from there we had moved to EverNought afterwards to be able to healthily deal with the trauma. She’d saved many lives that day, and I was proud of her. She’d been an amazing mom.

Our family were atheists, but we were always grateful for nature and believed in its spirit. My mum had always prayed with us before bed, more for fun and giggles, singing fast-paced little tales as she tickled us and clapped her hands. We’d stopped after her passing, as it was her own thing, and it was kind of down-feeling to have a memory like that bringing longing and sadness every night.

My dad often said, “As long as we have each other, there’ll be no need to cry, and if you cry, you’ll always have someone to cheer you up.” And that was true, and really comforting. He was a very light dude, after all, and he had a good life. Two kids, a good house and a well-paying job, not to talk about the beautiful environment. The huge, mixed forest is astounding, and the small town is cozy and overall pretty nice. And about his two kids…

‘Hey, by the way, where’s Samantha?’ I asked Dad. He turned around and took the saucepan with him, still stirring.

‘Oh, she’s out on a date with someone. I don’t remember his name, but he seemed decent. Or she’s out with her friends, it’s hard to keep track of her’, he chuckled. Wait, what? My whiny, slightly bratty little sister had gotten a date?

‘Nah, you’re kidding’, I said. Dad laughed again, and he almost couldn’t stop.

‘No, for real! I wonder how, though. She hasn’t really worked on her manners’, he grinned. ‘She’s a bit ahead of you, eh?’ I gasped and dramatically put my hand over my chest, and now Dad had to put the saucepan down again, he was laughing so hard.

‘You dare insult my fabulous singularity! Absolutely flabbergasted!’ I exclaimed with a grin. We laughed for a long while, and it was hard to stop since we just laughed harder every time we looked at each other again. But finally, when we’d managed to keep calm for approximately three seconds, Dad approached me and patted me on my shoulder.

‘You know I won’t force you to love, right? That’s something you choose yourself, buddy. It’s not my business, and you’re safe to love whoever you want! Sorry if I haven’t told you before.’ I hugged him and responded; ‘No, you’ve told me before. You’re safe to love whoever you want too.’ Dad hugged me back.

‘That’s right’, he replied, smiling. Then he let go and hurried to the stove - we’d both forgotten the hot chocolate. A few minutes later, Dad grabbed a pad and brought the saucepan to the dining table.

‘You up for some steaming hot liquid heaven?’ He asked triumphantly - not only a lit dad, also an amazing cook - as he showed me how he’d managed to avoid burning the cocoa into the bottom of the pan. As he talked, I grabbed the mugs and Dad poured in the cocoa. I took a sip, and… wow.

‘Woah. That’s amazing’, I managed to say before gulping down almost the entire thing. Dad smiled and sipped his slowly and calmly.

‘I’m surprised it turned out so good even though I forgot to stir for a while’, he said contentedly.

‘Is it okay if I bring some for me and Rick’s exploration adventure tomorrow? This cocoa is honestly better than heavenly! Though, I feel like we’re using that term a bit too much considering that we don’t believe in God and that stuff’, I figured. Dad smirked and said, ‘All hail the hot chocolate!’ while raising his mug. I burst into laughter and was relieved I wasn’t drinking at the moment.

I’m happy Dad doesn’t get irritated by my almost-constant laughter, at least. Dealing with my energy though, that was somewhat worse. Thinking about it, I should probably talk more about it with Dad. But not this second, I thought, when I heard someone unlocking the door.

‘That must be Samantha’, Dad said, getting up to welcome her in.

‘Okay, uh, I’m just gonna…’ I wanted to avoid more teasing - because of course my little sister took every chance to make herself feel better than me - so I got up and quickly swept around the corner of the hall into the living room, then I bolted to the door leading to our backyard, opened it and rushed out into the forest in a split second.

Great placing of the house, I thought to myself. Free activity whenever I felt like it.

Somewhere to spend all my overflowing energy and avoid annoying siblings.

Somewhere to feel a little more peace and quiet.

☙•❧

I run out into the woods regularly, so I didn’t have to worry about Dad wondering where I’d gone. It was no problem - and it was easier to spend time in the forest than in my room. Sure, my room was big and I had loads of stuff I could use to pass time with, but there were no walls in the forest - not any boundaries for my energy.

Plus, I wanted to go to the ravine and see if there was a way over without needing rope or other equipment. So I started making my way through the forest, and I realized that I should have brought a flashlight. It must’ve been quite some time past noon - the sun almost almost touched the treetops. Well, it is what it is. I just had to make it back before six, or else I’d miss dinner.

And I’d have to be really careful - there would be a lot of dangerous animals out now in the evening. But spending more than half of my conscious time in the forest gave me quite a lot of experience. I was sure nothing was going to happen.

In the fading sunlight you could see decently under the crowns of the trees, but soon enough it’d be too dark to see my own hands. It wouldn’t be a problem spotting wildlife considering their glowing eyes, but they’d have an easy time spotting me too, so that was one of the reasons to stay quiet. I was used to walking around in the forest in the dark, so I had a route where I’d be relatively predator-safe.

Just past my house was a big, pale oak, stripped of its bark. It was hollow and crooked, so when the wind passed by, it made a loud, continuous whistling noise. Past the whistling oak, there was a healthy, normal oak I used to climb. And I did so this time too - I climbed the healthy oak, and from there, I could continue climbing from tree to tree, naturally avoiding ground-borne predators.

It was in the middle of April, so it was just starting to get warmer outside, and the insects hadn’t really come back yet. That was nice - it would’ve been much worse if I had to climb around in the forest while ants marched around the branches I grabbed and wasps flew around my head. For now, it was just the most perfect time of the year.

I would say that I’m pretty fast, but the time literally flew by as I swung from tree to tree in a flow. I was having a really great time, so I didn’t even notice the shadows growing longer and pushing the sunlight out of view.

There were a few, barely visible rays of sunlight almost horizontally shining from the treeline far away, but as I got closer to the ravine, more and more light made its way from the ravine through the lush vegetation. When I measured I was roughly twenty meters away from the ravine, the forest opened up to reveal a small glade.

It was partially filled with fresh green grass, thinning out into flat, dirty rock closer to the ravine’s edge. But the building on the other side was nowhere in sight -  instead was another, different one.

To my left, almost halfway into the shrubbery and trees, was an intact abandoned cabin. It was pretty big, and from the look of it, it seemed to have been built pretty recently. But why was it there?

Wonder if someone lives there, I thought to myself, before approaching the building and barging down the door.

☙•❧

Okay, I didn’t really barge down the door, but I should’ve been a lot more quiet. Maybe it wasn’t so smart to break into an abandoned house during nighttime, but I couldn’t see any light inside it, and it was safer to be inside than outside now - and it doesn’t hurt to be concerned about safety. Plus, I could always talk to humans if there were any in here, but I would just get mauled by a bear or something if I stayed out. And I simply wanted to check the place out. So I was pretty relieved when I saw that there was no one inside from what I could see from the door. I closed it behind me - quietly this time - and examined the place.

The room I was standing in seemed to be a mixup between a living room and a kitchen, with a long kitchen island shielding off part of the kitchen. There wasn’t much furniture, just a worn old couch, a coffee table, a firepit - that I really hoped wasn’t clogged - and a couple armchairs in the corners. A rugged mat covered about half of the floor in the living room, and a dusty, dusty chandelier barely clung to the ceiling.

The kitchen wasn’t much better: there was a gas-driven stove, and miraculously enough an oven, a few pantries, cupboards, a sink and a kitchen island between the sink and stove. The stove seemed to work, I just had to bring gas and an icebox, then I could comfortably spend a few nights here.

I decided to quickly check the fireplace; and it was clogged with clumps of thicket. That was relieving, it’d be easier to remove than a bird nest or chimney creosote. I remembered when that’d happened to a friend of my dad’s - their chimney had been clogged by the tar-like stuff, and it’d almost caused a house fire. My dad had luckily been close by and noticed the smoke through a window, so he saved them from that. He worked as a firefighter, so he knew exactly how to work through it.

But there was still a lot of work to do - that I saw when I discovered a door in the living room, leading to a bedroom and a bathroom.

I didn’t spend much time in the bathroom, understandably. But in the bedroom, there was much to discover.

The double bed was torn up and dirty, as was the floor, the walls and surprisingly, the roof. There were a couple wardrobes, a shabby dresser, a moldy rug that had almost melted into the floor, and a bedside table that was barely intact.

I’ll visit here again, maybe with Rick, I thought to myself. I don’t have time to clean today, though. I checked the wardrobes and the dresser cautiously, but there was nothing inside except for a few blown-in leaves and a scared mouse. Had to check where it came from later on.

But I found something exceptionally weird when I opened the bedside table. The first table drawer held an old book, but it was covered in dried mud so I could hardly see the title, and the text inside was too small. The second drawer was filled with papers in plastic pockets, and they looked brand new. I wasn’t interested in them, so I let them be for the moment. They all looked like office files anyways. But the weirdest thing was in the third drawer.

There, under a layer of leaves and dry dirt, was a pretty wicked thing looking like a murder-weapon. 

☙•❧

It was a shining steel device, unlike anything I’d ever seen before. And I often visited the science lab at EverNought High. It was roughly the size of my arm, maybe a bit bigger, and it looked like a syringe mixed with a miniature robotic arm holding a couple pairs of pliers.

‘Uh… the hell is this?’ I mumbled out loud, examining the device closely. It didn’t have any buttons, or levers, so I wasn’t sure how it worked. It was made up of two sections, one short arm with the pliers sitting on top and the syringe kind of sitting in the middle top between the pliers, and then another arm below it with some kind of attachment system on the bottom. I guess it was made to connect some other kind of instrument.

‘I… don’t think I want to get too deep down investigating this thing’, I mumbled. It’s never too great to do so. So I carefully laid the device back in the bottom drawer, closed it, and began looking through the papers in the drawer above. Man, those were unsettling.

Most of them seemed to be documents over different “Subjects”, as the texts described them, sorted by numbers and occasionally letters. Some of them were files over things like “sector four”, other sectors, weird tools and instruments.

But there was something that really caught my attention. A file regarding something called Subject A.

There was no picture, but the descriptions were enough to illuminate an image in my head.

In the text, the subject was described as a bear-sized creature, looking like a wolf with furious, feral eyes. It was made out of an unknown substance beneath the fur and didn’t seem to have any bones, apart from its teeth.

The image painting itself in my head didn’t look very friendly. But why in the world would this be in an abandoned house in the middle of the forest? It had to be fake, right? Some kind of prank?

With shaking hands, I put the documents back down in the drawer, and brought my phone up from my pocket. I opened the bottom drawer again and took a photo of the device. After that, I called Dad.

He answered quickly with a bright ‘Hello, Jay!’, and a familiar sizzling in the background.

‘H-hey’, I stammered.

‘Hey, you sound kinda shook. Has something happened?’ Dad asked, now in a concerned tone.

‘No, not really. But do you think you can drive Boomer over to the ravine and pick me up?’ I asked, putting down the papers in the drawer with one hand.

‘Yeah, sure, buddy! Where around the ravine?’ I tried to describe where I was, including the abandoned cabin, but it was hard when I was shaking so much. I hadn’t found anything this messed up in a long time. Dad tried to console me, telling me to keep calm as he got the ATV going.

‘You said you’re inside an abandoned cabin, right? I think I’ve seen it before. Stay inside, I’ll be there as soon as possible’, he assured me, before ending the call.

I took a deep breath. Only a few minutes. Then I’d be back to safety. Away from this messed up house.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I truly need everyone on this hellsite to get comfortable expressing support for something without feeling the need to simultaneously distance yourself from it. this absolutely plagues the notifications of several of my posts, ranging from the one about friends having sex with each other to the new containment breach about romance novels.

"this is fine I WOULD PERSONALLY NEVER DO IT IT'S NOT FOR ME NOT MY CUP OF TEA NO SIR I WOULD PERSONALLY NEVER PLEASE DON'T MISTAKE ME FOR SOMEONE WHO WOULD but it's fine if you do" is like. idk. it's a small thing and it's dumb but making a point to distance yourself really undercuts the affirmation you're trying to to provide and more importantly it is very very annoying to have to scroll through in my notifs

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Palantir’s NHS-stealing Big Lie

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in TUCSON (Mar 9-10), then SAN FRANCISCO (Mar 13), Anaheim, and more!

Capitalism's Big Lie in four words: "There is no alternative." Looters use this lie for cover, insisting that they're hard-nosed grownups living in the reality of human nature, incentives, and facts (which don't care about your feelings).

The point of "there is no alternative" is to extinguish the innovative imagination. "There is no alternative" is really "stop trying to think of alternatives, dammit." But there are always alternatives, and the only reason to demand that they be excluded from consideration is that these alternatives are manifestly superior to the looter's supposed inevitability.

Right now, there's an attempt underway to loot the NHS, the UK's single most beloved institution. The NHS has been under sustained assault for decades – budget cuts, overt and stealth privatisation, etc. But one of its crown jewels has been stubbournly resistant to being auctioned off: patient data. Not that HMG hasn't repeatedly tried to flog patient data – it's just that the public won't stand for it:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2023/nov/21/nhs-data-platform-may-be-undermined-by-lack-of-public-trust-warn-campaigners

Patients – quite reasonably – do not trust the private sector to handle their sensitive medical records.

Now, this presents a real conundrum, because NHS patient data, taken as a whole, holds untold medical insights. The UK is a large and diverse country and those records in aggregate can help researchers understand the efficacy of various medicines and other interventions. Leaving that data inert and unanalysed will cost lives: in the UK, and all over the world.

For years, the stock answer to "how do we do science on NHS records without violating patient privacy?" has been "just anonymise the data." The claim is that if you replace patient names with random numbers, you can release the data to research partners without compromising patient privacy, because no one will be able to turn those numbers back into names.

It would be great if this were true, but it isn't. In theory and in practice, it is surprisingly easy to "re-identify" individuals in anonymous data-sets. To take an obvious example: we know which two dates former PM Tony Blair was given a specific treatment for a cardiac emergency, because this happened while he was in office. We also know Blair's date of birth. Check any trove of NHS data that records a person who matches those three facts and you've found Tony Blair – and all the private data contained alongside those public facts is now in the public domain, forever.

Not everyone has Tony Blair's reidentification hooks, but everyone has data in some kind of database, and those databases are continually being breached, leaked or intentionally released. A breach from a taxi service like Addison-Lee or Uber, or from Transport for London, will reveal the journeys that immediately preceded each prescription at each clinic or hospital in an "anonymous" NHS dataset, which can then be cross-referenced to databases of home addresses and workplaces. In an eyeblink, millions of Britons' records of receiving treatment for STIs or cancer can be connected with named individuals – again, forever.

Re-identification attacks are now considered inevitable; security researchers have made a sport out of seeing how little additional information they need to re-identify individuals in anonymised data-sets. A surprising number of people in any large data-set can be re-identified based on a single characteristic in the data-set.

Given all this, anonymous NHS data releases should have been ruled out years ago. Instead, NHS records are to be handed over to the US military surveillance company Palantir, a notorious human-rights abuser and supplier to the world's most disgusting authoritarian regimes. Palantir – founded by the far-right Trump bagman Peter Thiel – takes its name from the evil wizard Sauron's all-seeing orb in Lord of the Rings ("Sauron, are we the baddies?"):

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/01/the-palantir-will-see-you-now/#public-private-partnership

The argument for turning over Britons' most sensitive personal data to an offshore war-crimes company is "there is no alternative." The UK needs the medical insights in those NHS records, and this is the only way to get at them.

As with every instance of "there is no alternative," this turns out to be a lie. What's more, the alternative is vastly superior to this chumocratic sell-out, was Made in Britain, and is the envy of medical researchers the world 'round. That alternative is "trusted research environments." In a new article for the Good Law Project, I describe these nigh-miraculous tools for privacy-preserving, best-of-breed medical research:

https://goodlawproject.org/cory-doctorow-health-data-it-isnt-just-palantir-or-bust/

At the outset of the covid pandemic Oxford's Ben Goldacre and his colleagues set out to perform realtime analysis of the data flooding into NHS trusts up and down the country, in order to learn more about this new disease. To do so, they created Opensafely, an open-source database that was tied into each NHS trust's own patient record systems:

https://timharford.com/2022/07/how-to-save-more-lives-and-avoid-a-privacy-apocalypse/

Opensafely has its own database query language, built on SQL, but tailored to medical research. Researchers write programs in this language to extract aggregate data from each NHS trust's servers, posing medical questions of the data without ever directly touching it. These programs are published in advance on a git server, and are preflighted on synthetic NHS data on a test server. Once the program is approved, it is sent to the main Opensafely server, which then farms out parts of the query to each NHS trust, packages up the results, and publishes them to a public repository.

This is better than "the best of both worlds." This public scientific process, with peer review and disclosure built in, allows for frequent, complex analysis of NHS data without giving a single third party access to a a single patient record, ever. Opensafely was wildly successful: in just months, Opensafely collaborators published sixty blockbuster papers in Nature – science that shaped the world's response to the pandemic.

Opensafely was so successful that the Secretary of State for Health and Social Care commissioned a review of the programme with an eye to expanding it to serve as the nation's default way of conducting research on medical data:

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/better-broader-safer-using-health-data-for-research-and-analysis/better-broader-safer-using-health-data-for-research-and-analysis

This approach is cheaper, safer, and more effective than handing hundreds of millions of pounds to Palantir and hoping they will manage the impossible: anonymising data well enough that it is never re-identified. Trusted Research Environments have been endorsed by national associations of doctors and researchers as the superior alternative to giving the NHS's data to Peter Thiel or any other sharp operator seeking a public contract.

As a lifelong privacy campaigner, I find this approach nothing short of inspiring. I would love for there to be a way for publishers and researchers to glean privacy-preserving insights from public library checkouts (such a system would prove an important counter to Amazon's proprietary god's-eye view of reading habits); or BBC podcasts or streaming video viewership.

You see, there is an alternative. We don't have to choose between science and privacy, or the public interest and private gain. There's always an alternative – if there wasn't, the other side wouldn't have to continuously repeat the lie that no alternative is possible.

Name your price for 18 of my DRM-free ebooks and support the Electronic Frontier Foundation with the Humble Cory Doctorow Bundle.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/08/the-fire-of-orodruin/#are-we-the-baddies

Image: Gage Skidmore (modified) https://commons.m.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Peter_Thiel_(51876933345).jpg

CC BY-SA 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/deed.en

[free-my-boy-grumbot]

if you know don’t give it away, also i know all my followers have read it so i’m kinda hoping this breaches containment here

[changbunnies]

After The Rain With You (18+)

♡ Pairing: Farm Boy!Changbin x Princess!Reader

♡ Genre: royal au, historical au, fluff, initially intended to be light angst but i got carried away with emotion like i did with the minho fic lol, forbidden love (i cannot help myself with this trope it seems), sad / bittersweet ending :') (i'm sorry !!)

♡ Word Count: 13.8k (this was intended to be under 10k but here we are lmao oops)

♡ Summary: Y/N, a princess bored and lonely, craved nothing more than to experience the world outside of the familiar 4 walls of her bedroom in the castle. Conjuring her bravery, she snuck out of the castle walls, eventually meeting a man that would change her life forever; Changbin, a local farmer who didn't realize she's the princess, formed a close relationship with her that ineveitably turned into a budding romance. But now, met with her last moments of freedom, she prepares herself to have one final sweet moment with him before they are torn apart.

♡ Warnings: references to a parent being deceased, discussions of feeling trapped and alone, strict toxic parenting

♡ Smut Warnings (contains spoilers): reader is not a virgin during the smut scene in this but it is implied changbin is the only person they've ever had sex with, petnames (sweetheart, darlin', good girl and other gendered language), lots of kissing, marking (including biting), loose dom/sub dynamics, nipple play, oral (f receiving), unprotected piv, multiple orgasms, creampie, pretty self indulgent ngl lol

♡ Notes: i got the title from a short pokemon novel, iykyk. this was intended to be finished before the new year, but instead it's my first fic of 2024 and i hope you enjoy! as always you can read the story on my ao3 here, and if you're interested you can also check out my fic rec and feedback blog @stray-dreams

♡ Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.

Freedom; something simple in definition, but not in practice, those in high positions of power always holding it out of the reach of those below them who yearn for it. It's intangible in concept, something you will never be able to see with your own eyes or grab with your own hands, but it was something you always yearned for, more than anything- and in the short time you had it, it was pure bliss.

You never considered yourself a rebellious girl, always dutifully listening to your elders, commiting manners and elegance to memory, never questioning the role you'd one day be made to accept. But in the past year, you'd found yourself having a bit of a rebellious streak- in secrecy, of course, because you knew very well that there'd be consequences to pay should she find out.

It's not that you ever hated being the princess, or that you dreaded the responsibility you held to your kingdom- you just wish you'd been given more freedoms. Freedom to speak your mind, freedom to feel the grass beneath your feet and the sun's rays on your skin whenever you wished, freedom to explore, to make mistakes, to learn and grow and love the way everyone else in the world but you seemed allowed to do. 

For years, there'd been a blindspot in the castle's defenses, a small patch of broken wall that guards were never ordered to defend or monitor closely, as the country had not seen war or received threat from neighboring countries in your entire lifetime. "We'll repair it someday," your father always said before his passing, though it never came to fruition. It was not because he passed that the wall never received construction, but simply because your parents always preferred to delegate funds to something more pressing than a relatively small breach in the outer walls of the castle.

Sure, the hole was unsightly when noticed, but it was outside line of sight for the townsfolk, and much too small to accommodate an army through- one person at a time, maybe two if you squeezed, could fit through at most. Apart from that, the fact that your father never used taxes to pay towards selfish things such as unnecessary castle repair gained your family high favor, with most commoners considering your father to be the kindest king the country had in centuries.

During the time your father was still alive, you often walked the streets as a family, talking to the commoners regularly and enjoying your time out on the town together, and you remember how it always felt like you were as normal a family as any other, too young to realize there was any difference between you and them. You can still remember how your mother smiled then, when she held your hand while your father held the other, the townsfolk always doting on you, and how cheerfully your every day had been spent.

Your mother was quite different now; she never smiled anymore, and when she did it felt so.. forced, sad. Like your father took a piece of her joy with him when he went, and she was unable to reclaim it. And it was at that time, when she took on all of the king's responsibilities by herself, that she'd begun to treat you differently. Stricter on your studies, never allowing you to step foot outside the castle, shutting down any talk of letting you out on the town or interacting with anyone outside the castle's walls.

And now the whole kingdom, who considered you to be the country's most beloved princess, could scarcely remember what you looked like; and even those who could remember would likely no longer recognize you. You were a child when you were last allowed outside, and now you were a grown woman, still confined by her mother's strict rules.

Despite the reclusive life you were forced into, many of the commoners still thought of you fondly- at least according to word of mouth from the castle's maids and knights. You were the daughter to a king and queen that were practically revered as saints, and many imagined that the reason you were always holed up within the castle was because you were studying dutifully, imagining that when you came to power someday, you'd be just as benevolent, kind, and intelligent of a ruler as your father was.

You certainly intended to live up to those expectations, because as stated, you don't hate being the princess by any means. You recognize that you have privilege, responsibility, and that people put their pride and faith in you even now, before you've ever even come close to touching the throne. But all that being said, it didn't stop your heart from wanting just a little bit more out of your life.

Simply put, you found it incredibly dull sitting inside the castle all day, the same lessons being reiterated day in and day out, as if you didn't already have them memorized by the age of 10. Eventually, your mother realized you had no further need for a tutor, and requested that the woman in charge of your education stop coming, but that didn't mean your afternoons suddenly became enjoyable; quite the opposite in fact. 

The joy you initially held over no longer having to spend your afternoon listening to the same drivel you'd heard countless times from a pedantic old woman evaporated with the realization that even without a tutor to occupy for time, you'd still be stuck in the castle all day long. Your mother never permitted you to leave, even if you promised you'd stay close to the knights that would accompany you, pleaded with her to let you do something other than sitting inside all day. 

But still, her stance on the matter never changed. You'd begun to resent her sentiments, to hate that you were stuck with nowhere to go and nothing to do. The country wasn't under any threat, your fathers death was an unfortunate accident, and as far as you knew you were well loved, so what did she need to be so protective for? Especially now, when you weren't even a child anymore; you just couldn't understand.

You’d spend your days staring out your window listlessly, wondering what the grass on the horizon would feel like beneath bare feet. It’s a shame that you don’t know; you were always scolded for taking your shoes off if you weren’t within your own room, and besides that, the ground is littered with dirt and cobblestone all the way up to the gates of the town, which you had never gone past. Shouldn’t your youth be full of experiencing things like this? Why couldn’t you explore now and then settle down in the castle later in life? It didn’t feel fair that you were so clueless about the basic truths of the world, and instead had your brain filled to the brim with knowledge of etiquette and politics.

It was with those thoughts in mind that you planned to find the answers to all your questions and sate your endless curiosities by sneaking through the hole in the castle walls that had gone unattended to. After the first time you successfully snuck out to experience all you’d been missing (which took months of diligent watch and preparation to ensure you wouldn’t be spotted from a distance by patrolling knights), you’d slowly made your way further and further away from the castle, testing the limits of how far you could make it each day, gauging how long it would take for someone to notice your absence. To your delight, because you spent most of your days alone in your room, no one seemed to notice you’d ever been gone as long as you made it back before dinner was to be served.

And so, you'd stay out until sunset, exploring the town you'd grown to only ever see from your window, making sure to wear the least expensive looking gown in your wardrobe, doing your best to blend in with the commoners. Thankfully, the task was easier than you'd expected given that none of the townsfolk had seen you up close since you were a small girl. You were perhaps strange in behavior as compared to them, given how much you questioned what was around you, but certainly not one person suspected you were the princess- just a sheltered, perhaps eccentric, young woman.  

As you became more comfortable, and got closer to the town gates with each passing day, your excitement would grow exponentially; the world beyond the gates was so foreign to you, even more so than the town itself had been. From your bedroom window, the fields that lied beyond the town gates appeared so miniscule, and you only knew what lied beyond because you’d been told about it, not because you’d seen it for yourself.

It was this determination to discover what lied beyond your limited world view that lead you to meet the man who'd come to hold your heart for the first time. You remember how your heart raced when you first approached the town gates, how your eyes darted to every corner to try to take in every minute detail.

The cobblestone became sparse, leaving nothing but dirt road to walk on, the wheels of countless carriages and horses hooves indented in the path, leading both to and away from town. You’d been told numerous times that beyond this point lies the farms that fueled the town with their food, and resources such as leather and wool to create clothing, blankets, and the upholstery on your furniture. And for the first time in your entire life, you were about to see it all up close with your own eyes, instead of vaguely from your bedroom window.

You knew their work was vital to the prosperous existence of your country, and you’d always found yourself wanting to know what it was like, to learn about how the world works not from a dull lecture or written text, but to experience it yourself, to truly understand the lives of the people you would one day govern beyond what you’d been told. To say you had a curious mind was perhaps an understatement; you were always full of curiosity about the world around you, but simply being told about the world wasn’t enough for you to be satisfied. 

To experience with your own eyes, to feel with your own hands- that was what being alive was truly about, wasn’t it? You didn’t feel your life was meant to be spent wasting away in your room until the day you became useful. If you spent your youth seeing the world, learning about it from your own lived experiences, wouldn’t that make you a better queen some day? To know the plight of the common man because you lived it for yourself? 

That’s what you wanted- the freedom to explore, to learn, to grow, and when the time was right, you’d accept your duty gracefully, and play the role you were meant to, but until then, there was nothing more you wanted than to feel the earth beneath your feet, to understand what a blessing it truly is to feel the warmth of the sun beaming down on your skin, to learn what it is that makes life beautiful to live. 

With a deep inhale to steady your racing heart, you took your first step outside the town gates, trying your best to not appear too nervous and draw undue attention to yourself. You conjured all the confidence you could muster into your steps, your short heels sinking into the pure dirt before you. It was a clear spring day, the sun welcoming you warmly, as if confirming that this was a decision you were meant to make, that following your heart and exploring the lush earth is what your true purpose was. 

You recall how different everything felt once you were fully outside the town- it was almost unbelievable how green, pretty and vibrant the outside looked when compared to the dull, monotonous grays and dirty browns you'd met with inside the town walls. And even the castle interior, while still pretty and not devoid of color like the town often seemed to be, still didn't compare to the nature that lied before you.

You saw children running through the grass without shoes, freely giggling as they play what you assume to be some sort of game, one you'd never had the chance to play. They were utterly carefree, and so full of life; how you wished you could be the same- just kick off your shoes and prance through the fields and the trees without a care in the world, with nothing to weigh you down. What a joy it must be, to live innocent and free, knowing nothing but laughter and love. 

You took time to admire naturally growing flowers, to lean down to carefully caress the petals, to feel the grass on your fingertips since you’re much too scared to actually take your shoes off despite how bad you’d have liked to. Following the road, past the sprawling fields where the children play, you eventually came to the occupied farm lands, and it was there, just before the fields turned into seemingly endless forest, that you met him for the first time.

His was the last farm for you to observe, and it held a surprise that made you positively gasp in delight; animals! You'd always thought the farm animals you’d seen in your books looked so cute, and you always wanted to feel their fur or feathers, wondering if they were truly as soft or as coarse as they were described to you. Was a sheep’s wool still soft before it was knit into a blanket, or woven into clothing? It was something you were endlessly curious about. 

However, you certainly knew better than to just waltz up to an animal that doesn't know you, and especially not one that is on someone else's land. So you settled for quietly observing them from outside the farm's sprawling gate, a huge smile on your face as you watched the animals graze. Even at your distance, it was still the closest you'd ever been to an animal other than a horse, and you simply couldn't get over how cute and soft they looked. Sheep, cows, chickens, ducks- all impossibly cute, and how you wished you could go and hug them.

You propped your arms up on the wooden fence, resting your head against them as you simply watched. It was almost funny how something so simple and normal to someone else's everyday life could instill such joy and wonder with you. And that's when you saw him; a single man walking out from his quaint cottage towards the back of the land, attending to the animals and filling up what you assumed to be their feed troughs.

His home, you noticed, was put together the same way most of the town was- with stone and clay, a simple but well constructed wooden door, and a decent sized chimney on the left that you were well aware was necessary to funnel out smoke from fireplaces in homes such as his. And it fascinated you how his home could look so different from yours when it was comprised of the same materials.

When put down simply to its parts, there was nothing that separated the castle from a commoner’s home other than the sheer size of it. Your mother would often tell you not to compare yourself, or the splendor of the castle to that of commoners or their homes, but you never saw any harm in doing so. 

You’re all human, and the only difference between you and them is that you were born into a royal family and they weren’t. You think she focuses too much on title, when to you title is worth nothing beyond a name. Still, while you recognize that while you aren’t different from anyone else in a biological sense, you are when it comes to status, and you wanted to use your privileged position for good when the time came, which is another reason you wanted to see the country for yourself, to put yourself in the shoes of the people and understand them. How can you be a good queen someday if you understand nothing of how the world truly works, or if every decision is fed to you from someone else? 

Really though you have to admit, apart from all the good reasons you had to sneak out, you equally had selfish ones. But was it so wrong to indulge your curiosity? You’ve tried many times to push aside your thoughts and to understand why you must stay solitary in the castle all day, but try as you might, this is all you want. To see, to experience, to feel; why was it only wrong for you to want that, and not for anyone else? Even if you’re the princess, you should still be allowed basic human freedoms- that’s what you believe, anyways.

You lost yourself in thought for a time, simply staring out at the scene of the man caring for his animals in front of you. You wondered if he was happy doing this everyday; was it monotonous, or did he take pride in it? Did he love his animals, or were they strictly the avenue he'd taken to provide for himself? You also wondered what you would be doing if you weren't the princess; would you be a farmer's daughter, spending all your days in the fields with the animals like he does? 

It was oddly fun to ponder on, to picture yourself leading a different life than one you'd led up to that point; maybe it was a form of escapism, and maybe you had more grievances with your upbringing than you'd let yourself believe at the time, but either way, a smile once again made its way to your lips as you pictured yourself feeling the fluffy wool of a sheep beneath your fingertips, as warm, soft, and comforting as a blanket in your imagination.

The man took notice of you after only a few moments, because realistically, how can he not notice a girl blatantly propped against his fence, staring at his land? He’s sure he doesn’t know you, doesn’t recognize you from any of the farming families that have homes adjacent to his, and he doesn’t go into town nearly enough to have made friends outside his small bubble. So who were you, and why are you staring at him like that?

"Do you need somethin', miss?" The burly man called out to you as he started to approach, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his arm. "O-Oh, uh, no, I apologize," you stuttered out, feeling instantly intimidated as he came closer; not because he was an intimidating person per se, because while his eyes are sharp, they also have a unique softness to them. It was his size that made you shrink back and feel small; you didn’t realize just how large the man was until he was practically face to face with you, and even the knights you’re met with daily, who undergo strict, intensive physical training, pale in comparison to the muscular physique of the man you in time came to know well.

You remember how he looked at you curiously, head tilting to the side as he watched you straighten your posture and take a step back from his fence. “I was just.. curious, about the animals. They’re very cute,” you explained and the man chuckled a bit, wiping his dirty hands on his worn trousers before stepping up to his fence. “I take it you’re from the town then? Can’t imagine you bein’ that curious about my animals otherwise,” he replied pleasantly, a warm, sort of prideful smile on his face. It confirmed his suspicions as well- you were definitely not someone he’s met before.  

"Yes, I've only ever seen them in books," you explained further, a bit timid now as you suddenly felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you. You were sure a commoner of your age would never be as fascinated by the animals as you were; they see them every day, it's a normal part of life for them. And you recall scolding yourself, really feeling that you needed to do a better job of hiding your lack of worldly experience when meeting new people so you'd stop having interactions like this. “I apologize again, I must appear very strange..”

“No need for that, sweetheart. I think it’s nice- I’m so used to bein’ around ‘em, that I don’t really stop and take it all in anymore. Reminds me of what I got, so thank you for that,” he replied kindly, his smile spreading an unfamiliar warmth through you in that moment. He was very, very kind, and you appreciated that he didn't judge you or find you to be a fool for your innocent curiosity.

"I could show you around, if you'd like. Let you meet them," he offered, and you positively beamed, though you really should have shown some restraint in the matter. "Could I really?" you couldn't help but ask eagerly, eyes sparkling with pure wonder and excitement at the prospect of seeing so many things you'd never encountered before up close. “Course, just come ‘round to the front, and tell me your name.” 

You yelled out your name as you eagerly turned and began to sprint (in quite unladylike fashion, you might add) to where you saw the gate to his property some time earlier. You could hear the man's laugh carry even as you ran (not advised in the shoes you were wearing, but you carried on nonetheless), stopping just in front of the small, modest gate. You waited for the kind man to catch up to you, not wanting to do anything rude or presumptuous by stepping onto his land without being specifically directed inside.

"You took off so fast, you didn't give me a chance to introduce myself," he laughed as he approached you again, and your face immediately flushed, embarrassed by your excitability over everything. "Name's Changbin," he introduced himself warmly after he opened the gate for you, and you smiled timidly, giving a polite bow after you crossed the border onto his property. “Pleasure to meet you, Changbin.”

"Likewise," he smiled as he closed the gate behind you, and it was then that your first true friendship began. In hindsight, it occurred to you that you should've given him a fake name, and while he did ponder on why your name seemed so familiar to him, he didn't ever appear to put together that you were the princess.

What was clear to him was that you were from a wealthy family; after all, that was the only explanation he could reach to decipher some of your "odd" behaviors. Your boundless curiosity, your utter excitement for the mundane, an unmatched passion for all the small things in life that he'd never seen before in anyone else. A light in your eyes as bright as the sun, filling him with warmth and adoration, your wonder and inquisitive nature both pure and infectious. 

He asked you once, what it is your family does, if being from the "high society" part of town near the castle is what made you live a sheltered life, why you seemed so (respectfully) clueless about things beyond the scope of inner-town workings and politics. You were surprised when he asked, and confirmed what he suspected, though you left out some of the very important details. After all, how could you tell him that the girl he's become friends with over the past few months, didn't just live near the castle- her home is the castle.

But you divulged what little you could, confided in him that your mother has high expectations of you, that she doesn't know you spend your days with him at his farm, that if she did know she certainly wouldn't approve, and he seemed to understand. While he may not be a high born man, he's no stranger to how haughty they can be, what with their superiority complexes and luxury goods, as if it's not working men like him that provide them with what they consume in the first place.

You weren't like that in the slightest- you were good, pure natured, with an infectious zest for life that he couldn't help but find his own joy in. Seeing you interact with the world, the happiness you gained from the simplicities in life, the wonder and curiosity you held for all things, both small and grand- it was a trait of yours he'd come to adore.

You learned from him just as much as he learned from you, and you truly reminded him how beautiful life is, how there is magic even in the mundane, what a gift it is to have, to be, and to feel. Changbin introduced you to so much, shared so many parts of his life, and you were truly the happiest you'd ever been, always looking forward to the next day you could go out and see him again.

"Have you ever ridden a horse?" he asked one summer afternoon when you were in stables together, you sat on a hay bale while you watched him care for Dolly, a beautiful, black and white dappled horse that belonged to his mother, whom she named such due to 'her mane being as beautiful as a porcelain dolls.' "Does being escorted in a carriage count?" you asked, and he laughed, shaking his head in amused disbelief.

"No, darlin', a carriage don't count," he said, smiling as you pouted ever so slightly. You were still a child the last time you were even in a carriage, given the fact that your mother never permits you to leave. You wondered what's more enjoyable; your memory of your last carriage ride is so faded, you wondered if you could even compare the experiences, were you to ever ride a horse.

As if sensing your thoughts, Changbin made an offer that once again made you beam, radiating joy and excitement. "I could teach you how. Or let you ride with me," he offered and you were eagerly nodding without a second thought, jumping straight to your feet. "I'd love that!" Changbin returned your smile, promising that once he got Dolly situated in a saddle, he'd take you for a ride while telling you everything he knows and answering any question you may have about it, no matter how small or seemingly silly and "common sense."

He helped you up onto her back, making sure you sat comfortably on the back of the saddle, both your legs dangling over one side of her body due to the fact that you were wearing a dress. Changbin got up onto the saddle with ease, carefully not to accidentally hit you with his leg while making his ascent. After he was settled in front of you, he instructed you to wrap your arms around his torso, as it takes time to become adjusted to the movement of the horse and naturally find your balance.

You wondered if he could feel your heart race when your chest was pressed against his back, how your palms grew sweaty from holding onto him, how your face flushed every time he called Dolly a "good girl", wondering what it'd be like if he said the same to you, if he praised you after he encouraged you or taught you something new.

But the more comfortable you got, the more he allowed Dolly to pick up speed, until she was going around the enclosed pen in a brisk trot, your arms squeezing Changbin as you giggle joyfully, feeling the wind brush by your ears and pull back your hair. It was so fun, so new, another experience Changbin granted you that you wouldn't otherwise have ever had the chance to have.

When you were finished, as the sun was beginning to set and it was time for you to get home, lest your mother send a maid to summon you for dinner and find you absent, he jumped off first, and then held out his hand to you, offering for you to take it, promising he'd make sure you got down safely.

And he did, letting you squeeze his hand as you made the unfamiliar leap off, his opposite hand coming to your back to ensure you were stable on your feet after you landed. His hand lingered even after it was apparent you were steady, and yours did as well, still holding onto his hand even though you no longer had need to. It felt as though there was a shift between you- both staring carefully at one another, a suggestion that you could be something more than this, that there was a connection beyond that of just friendship.

Slowly, with the same smile for you he always had, he pulled his hand away from your back, but didn't make you part from his hand, letting you hold it even as he walked you to his gate. And you felt a stutter in your heart, unlike any you'd ever felt before then, returning his smiles happily, your cheeks dusted pink even as you thanked him for the afternoon and bid him goodbye, every once in a while turning back just to him still watching you, offering a soft smile and wave each time your gazes met again.

Then, there was the time you were inside his chicken coops with him, Changbin having taught you much about how to properly care for the animals in your time near him. And after weeks of observation, you wanted to help, to really try your hand at it! You did well, for the most part- your error came when trying to get a hen away from a freshly laid egg.

You tried your best to follow Changbin's instructions carefully, but still, your inexperience was greatly apparent, and you ended up upsetting the poor thing. When she flew up in protest, it startled you, and you nearly fell backwards, but Changbin caught you, one of his strong arms wrapped around your back and holding you upright as if you weighed nothing at all.

You blinked up at him in surprise, face growing red as he asked if you were alright, your heart unexpectedly pounding. You muttered out an apology, voice much meeker than you wanted it to be, but he simply smiled, helping you steady yourself again to stand on your own, ensuring you that it wasn't your fault, and that he could tell you were genuinely trying your best.

"No one gets it right on their first try, don't be discouraged, you did good, sweetheart," he said, and the words somehow made your heart race faster, face growing even pinker. You were certain then- you liked him as much, much more than a friend. You wanted him to always praise you, to console you, to call you sweetheart in a way beyond platonic- to look at you romantically, to call you by such sweet names in a moment of love and passion.

When you returned home that day, lying in bed after finishing dinner and washing up, your thoughts were plagued by him- much more than they usually were, and in completely different contexts. How would his strong arms feel under your fingers while he held you up, supporting all of your weight as he took you in every way conceivable, across every surface of his home.

You'd had.. less than pure thoughts before of course, so it's not like this was new to you- what was new was having an explicit object of desire, someone you wanted to lie with, someone you imagined touching you everywhere, and you touching them and pleasuring them in equal measure.

There were many times you watched him work, sweat collecting on his forehead, dripping down his brow, his breath growing heavier with labor, his broad chest rising and falling quickly with exertion- would he look the same atop you? Body heavy between your legs, pressing you down, and God, you were driving yourself crazy thinking about it.

Changbin noticed, another summer day, sun high and hot, leaving him sweatier than usual, and your face hot and red (though for reasons beyond that of the sun beaming down on you.) "C'mon sweetheart, let's go inside. It's hot out here, ain't it?" he'd said, deciding it was time, for both your sakes, to take a well deserved break. You agreed, thankful beyond words he thought it was simply the sun making you a heated mess, and not how absolutely divine he looked chopping wood in preperation for when the weather would change in a month.

You sat on his sofa together, sipping on lemonade he made himself by hand, thankful to be out of the unforgiving sun (and to have something to focus on besides how attracted you were to him.) "You seem to be thinkin' a lot today. What's on your mind, sweetheart?" Changbin asked after it was quiet for a time, your cup of lemonade held in your lap as you stared off at unfixed location.

"I've.. come to like you quite a lot more than I expected. As more than a friend, I think," you answer honestly, though you don't expect him to do anything with your feelings. While he's your first real connection with someone, you're sure he's lived a full, experienced life. You feel there's no reason for him to like you as you like him, but still you told him, for you already hide enough about your life from him, and you don't want your thoughts and feelings to be one of those things you keep from him.

"I'm fond of you too. More than a friend, and more than you probably know," he replied with a soft smile, setting his empty cup to the side. You blinked, cheeks turning pink as you practically gaped at him. "Do you mean that? Sincerely?" you asked, heart thumping loudly as you too carefully set your cup aside. "I wouldn't lie to you darlin'. 'Specially not about matters of the heart," he responded earnestly, carefully moving closer to you.

You met him halfway, slowly, your eyes timidly meeting his as his hand comes towards you, resting heavy but soft on your cheek. "Tell me truly," he almost whispers, face coming close enough to yours to feel his breath tickle your skin, "Do you want to kiss me as badly as I want to kiss you?" "Yes," you breathed out, and not even a full second later, his lips were on yours, plush and soft, butterflies filling your stomach and truly, you couldn't ask for any greater joy than that moment.

You kissed a lot after that- in greeting and in parting, sweetly, slowly, carefully, sometimes even urgently, needily, passionately. You'd help him with as much of his daily work as you could manage, so he could finish faster and you could spend the rest of the afternoon holding one another close, hands exploring anywhere and everywhere, both eager, both seeking more and more and more, both indulging in the feeling of not just pleasure, but of closeness, intimacy beyond just the physical, the love and care you share for one another.

But as quickly as your happiness was obtained, it was taken away; unbeknownst to you, on an afternoon in early fall, shortly after breakfast, a knight had seen you squeezing through the hole in the castle's wall, eager to spend yet another day with Changbin. He didn't think you were sneaking out at first- he thought maybe he was just mistaken on what he saw, but when he stepped over, and it became clear that you were now nowhere to be seen, he had to inform your mother, as was his duty.

And there are truly no words to describe how devastated you felt when suddenly, as if from nowhere, countless knights were surrounding you, pleading with you to return to the castle, lest they have to drag you back by your mother's command. It became a spectacle in the street, commoners whispering amongst themselves as they tried to piece together what they were witnessing, and if the sweet, smiley girl they’d seen exiting and returning to town everyday for months was really the princess this entire time.

You felt as if your entire world was collapsing as they escorted you back home, your heart squeezing painfully in your chest, knowing your mother would be positively furious when your eyes next met. But no, she wasn’t just furious- she was livid, the angriest you’d ever seen her in all your years. You pleaded with her to understand, assured her that if you were truly going to run away from home and abandon your responsibility, then you wouldn’t have returned every single time you’d left. You didn’t want to be stuck here all day, every day, bored, alone, depressed, when there was an entire world out there to see, people to talk to, experiences to be had. You’d do everything expected of you as a princess, and later as queen, but please- just this one thing, allow me this one thing.

But no, your pleas fell on deaf ears, your mother completely dismissive of your feelings and unwilling to bend her iron rules. And so you once again became a prisoner inside your own room, tears streaming down your cheeks as you stared at the edge of town from your window, Changbin so near, yet impossibly far. Your mother didn’t know of Changbin, you didn’t tell her, nor would you ever, as things stand now- but how you wished you could tell her, “I’ve found love, and now I understand how truly a magical thing it is. I don’t want this to be the end of my joy.” 

Weeks passed, and while the pain never left you, you learned to manage it well enough, hopeful that you’d be reunited with Changbin someday soon. But then you saw them- carpenters, working diligently to fill the hole in the castle walls that you had repeatedly used for your daily escapes. The color drained from your face, your heart sinking into the very depths of your stomach. Your plan to simply be an obedient daughter long enough for your mother to lessen her watchful eyes on you, to one day again leave the castle once her constant vigil had relaxed, was being thwarted before it could ever truly begin. 

You anticipated to be in this act for the long haul, knowing very well it could take months, or even years, to rebuild your mother’s trust in you, but you’d never imagined she’d take away the very source of your hope mere weeks after confining you away to your room. To call a hole in the castle’s defenses your “hope” may seem foolish to most, but it was all you had- a symbol of escape, of life beyond these four walls that had become your permanent home. 

The day it was filled would be the day you’d lose everything; your freedom, your friendships, your joy, your hopes, your dreams, everything. Even as you are now, a canary trapped in her gilded cage, the promise that simple flaw in the walls gave you kept you going- the promise that someday, even if it was years and years from now, you’d be free again, doing what you loved most, being with who you loved most. 

You know your mother cares for you, she wants the best for you, and the loss of your father, the king, much too soon has deeply scarred her. She fears for you, she keeps you ever at arm’s length because she can’t bear for you to part from her, to leave her behind the way your father had, but surely this isn't the answer. Surely there was something better than this, something that didn’t necessitate you being a prisoner in your own home. 

Fear of loss and devastation ruled her life, made her trap you lest you decide to leave and never return, failing to realize that it was her very actions and treatment of you that gave those fears of hers room to become reality. But to know heartbreak is to know truest love, and even should loss plague your life, you will never regret having discovered love.

You had no desire to abandon your family, your kingdom, or run from your responsibilities, but if that was the only way to be free, if there was no other conceivable way to experience life’s joys and warmth, then.. What else was there for you to do? Ironic, how your mother had unwittingly created a self-fulfilling prophecy when she forbade you from living a life of your own, her own actions resulting in the very outcome she feared most of all.

You have to do something, anything, now, before it’s too late, and you are left with nothing but the fleeting memories of the man you hold so dear. You bide your time, waiting until nightfall when the carpenters have left for the night to make your move. Your mother has posted knights to the spot now, instructed to keep a watchful eye should you try again to leave the premises, but you think with the right timing, you can slip out unnoticed. 

There’s a small window of time where, when the knights standing guard rotate shifts, the hole in the castle’s walls will have no one standing in front of them. It’s risky, and if you’re too slow you’ll be spotted by the new knights taking over for the ones who departed, but it’s the only chance you have, so you need to take it. As soon as the knights previously keeping watch over the area get far enough away, you dart for the breach in the castle. The hole is definitely smaller than it was before, but you still manage to squeeze past just fine, with seconds to spare before you hear the sounds of the new knights approaching, luckily having not noticed anything amiss.

The streets are much different at night, the subtle illumination from the candles in the surrounding buildings hardly enough to point you in the right direction. You look to the horizon instead, hoping that the dark line of trees on the horizon will be enough to guide you to the gate leaving town. Some who notice your desperate run call out, concern evident in their voice, but you can’t stop for them, can’t stop until you’ve made it to Changbin’s side. And though it is not without struggle, you do, eventually, thankfully, find your way out of the town.

You’re panting, chest heaving as your heart pounds and your lungs desperately try to suck in air once you’ve made it completely outside the town gates- but still, you aren’t where you need to be, so you can’t stop yet. Pushing yourself to your very limits, even as your legs scream at you and harsh cold pricks your skin, you can finally make out Changbin’s land in the tree-lined horizon. Reaching the gate to his property, you push it open in haste, taking hardly any steps past the threshold before you collapse to your knees, the ache and exhaustion refusing to be ignored any further. 

You bring a hand to your heart, taking a few seconds to calm yourself and breathe before you attempt to rise back to your feet, but your legs refuse the action, much too weak to support you beyond what they’ve already done. It’s good enough, you suppose; they’ve carried far, with much more urgency than you’d ever thought possible, and now you’re right here, so close to where you need to be- and despite being a princess, you’re not above crawling your way over to Changbin’s door if you must.

Once more, you try- and though weak, and unsteady, you are able to rise once more. You can’t run, can hardly even walk as sore and as exhausted as your legs are, but they carry you as far as they can, recognizing the urgency you feel, aiding you as much as it can in your last, desperate effort. Your throat is dry, it hurts, but you call out Changbin’s name regardless, hoping he’s awake, hoping he hears you, hoping he’ll wrap his arms around you, kiss you, console you, even if it’s just this one last time.

It’s been over a month since the last time Changbin saw you, and there’s so many questions he can’t help but ask himself, that he wishes he could ask you, so he didn’t spend all his hours distracted with worry and self-doubt. There had been gaps in the time you spent together before, but never for this large of a duration of time- a week usually at most. Did he do something wrong the last time you were together? Or did your strict mother finally learn of your deceit, and now made you keep away, unable to return to his side though you may have wished to? 

He just wishes he knew for certain what it is, so that even if he was saddened, he did not have to have his mind consumed by what-if’s and uncertainties. There was a time, even, where he considered going into town and asking of you, but he was worried that doing so would only create more problems for you if the wrong person caught word of his inquiries. So all he could was wait- wait, and hope, that you would return again before year’s end, and that he would have the answers he so desperately craves to his questions.

Most of all, he just hopes you’re well; you’d expressed more than once that you loved your life and your family, you just didn’t want to feel trapped. You wanted to have choices, to feel like your thoughts and opinions matter, to be allowed to live as most other people do when you are not burdened with work. Whenever you spoke of home, he always found it unfair, and he felt for you- you loved your mother, dearly, but he could see how you struggled with her rules, how sadness lingered in your eyes and resent bubbled up within you despite how you tried to not feel such things. 

And though he understood why you could not, he wished at times that you could simply stay with him- to not have to depart the moment the sun began to sink, to lie in bed with him all night, to have breakfast and dinner together, to live without worry together. He’d work hard for you, even harder than he does now, and it’d be worth it to see you smile at him as you always do, so bright and full of light, keeping each other company on your loneliest days and nights. 

Changbin sighs, exhaustion plaguing him as he sits before the small fire he has going in his living room, head falling back against his sofa. He hasn’t slept well these past few nights- he just can’t help but think of you at all hours, and every time he closes his eyes to sleep, he’s met with the image of you. It keeps him up, though not all his thoughts of you are plagued by unpleasant worry- sometimes it’s simply just the image of you smiling or laughing, and he feels nothing but warmth, even as he is reminded how much he truly misses you. 

Should you never return again, for whatever reason that may be, he doesn’t think he would ever regret having known you and given his love to you. Short-lived though your romance may be in the grand scheme of his life, and all the years he may be blessed to live, it was of the utmost importance, and he’d be remiss to let those memories become tarnished or devalued. You reminded him of how much joy there is in life, how grateful he is to have what he does, how much beauty there is in even the smallest of things. 

Another sigh leaves his lips as he lifts his head, rubbing carefully at his weary eyes- he should probably try to rest soon, though he feels sleep will likely stay out his reach for some time after his head hits the pillows. He stands from the sofa, preparing himself to extinguish the fire and head to bed, when he hears a strange, unfamiliar sound from outside his door. A thud, almost- as if something with a not insubstantial amount of weight thumped to the ground. 

It couldn’t be his logs- he knew the sound of falling logs well enough to recognize the distinct sound made when one toppled, and often times when one fell, more followed. This was unlike that entirely, only one sound followed by silence, and the sound itself was still too dense to be one of his pieces of chopped wood. The sound felt more.. concentrated; an animal perhaps? And if it was an animal, he couldn’t let it go ignored- especially not if it was one of his own. 

As Changbin steps closer to his door to investigate the sound, he hears something else entirely unexpected- a frail voice.. your voice..? Rushing to his door now, he opens it in haste, eyes darting to find the source of what he heard. And there, he sees you, collapsed to the ground before him, looking up at him with a mix of relief, exhaustion, and anguish. “Y/N-” he gasps as he leans down to you, concern evident in his voice and expression, hands reaching out to touch you and shit, your body is freezing; you are woefully ill dressed for the fall chill, and who knows how long you’ve been out in it with nothing but your dress. 

Quickly, he picks you up, carrying you inside and using his foot to kick the door shut behind him. “Just sit here a minute,” he says as he sits you down on the sofa, rushing to his room to grab all the blankets and pillows he can carry. He prepares a sort of makeshift bed on the floor in front of the fireplace, laying down a couple blankets and pillows, with the intention to have you lay by the fire and spread some much needed warmth through your chilled body. 

Changbin scoops you back up when he’s satisfied with his work, very carefully laying you down a close (yet safe) distance to the fire, nestling beside you after and laying an additional blanket over your bodies. He has so many questions, his mind is racing, but they can wait- making sure you’re not going to suffer frostbite is of much more importance. He lets you use him for warmth, not complaining a bit when your cold limbs tangle with his, letting you sap his warmth and take it for your own. 

He brings his hands to your face, warming your cold cheeks in his palms, looking you over carefully. You looked unhurt, thankfully- he has no idea what you’ve gone through, but he’s glad you’re here now, and looking well, all things considered. “Do you want to tell me what’s happened?” he asks softly, pushing the fallen hair away from your eyes, letting him meet your gaze without obstruction. You swallow down your bubbling emotion, wanting to be clear and concise, to leave no room for confusion or error. 

“My mother is very strict, as you know.. She enforced her rules more harshly after she discovered how I’d been spending my time. I had to sneak out again just to be here,” you answer, and his brows furrow. “Again..? Have you been sneaking out to see me all this time?” he asks, and you nod, tears pricking the corners of your eyes. Changbin knew your mother had strict rules, he knew she didn’t approve of her daughter meeting with those of lower class, but that wasn’t the extent of it? 

This whole time, he thought your lie to your mother was simply that you exited town- not that you left home entirely. He was under the impression that you were still allowed out on the streets, at the very least; not that you were caged up inside all day like some sort of bird. But this.. This was outrageous, cruel. To not let your daughter out of the house at all? That’s what you’d been dealing with this entire time? 

Relationships with parents are complex, but he almost can’t even believe you still love her after all this, that you still want to uphold whatever ambitions it is that she has for you; if it were him, he doesn’t think he could stand it. He followed in his parents footsteps because he wanted to, not because he was forced to. And he doesn’t imagine you’d be much different from him in that regard; naive though you may be at times, you had a strong sense of responsibility, and were intelligent in matters he was clueless on, a completely different kind of intellect from his own. 

“You can stay with me,” he wants to say, “I’ll never make you do a single thing you don’t want to do, you’ll always be respected and happy.” But he knows you’d refuse, your sense of pride in yourself and responsibility simply too strong to abandon just because of one obstacle, harsh though that obstacle may be. In equal measure, you don’t think you could ever ask him to stay with you. How much would he have to give up to be with you? 

You don’t want to ask that of him- to make him give up his home and all he holds dear just to be stuck in the castle with you. He doesn’t even know you’re the princess in the first place. And though you love him, it’s painfully apparent that you’re in two separate worlds that may not be destined to converge though you wish them to. “I don’t want this to be the end,” you say, hot tears finally starting to fall as you the emotion unleashes itself from the depths of where you’d pushed them down, “I don’t want this to be the last time I see you.”

God, Changbin feels like his heart is shattering. It’s so painful to see you reduced to this, you who is always so bright and vibrant in her joy, brought low to tears and heartache. Why must you endure this? Does your mother truly not understand how much pain she causes you but not allowing you to simply live? “Don’t think like that. If you say it’s the end, then it will be,” he whispers, the pain in his own voice evident despite how he tries to hide it behind a mask of strength for your sake.

The tears flow from your eyes and you let him rub them away with his thumb, letting him fill your head with impossible, sweet promises. Your whole life was clouded in dreadful, dreary rain, and there’s nowhere you wanted to be more after the rain than with Changbin. What a ray of sunshine he was, even without intending to be- the light that illuminated your otherwise dark existence. And how painful it was to know that come morning, it would all become nothing but a memory from your youth. 

You lean forward to kiss him, tears continuing to leak from the corners despite having your eyes closed now. You want to tell him “I love you” but you fear that saying so will only make the act of parting that much harder and painful. You fear that no matter how much time passes, the name of your first love will forever be written in your heart, that you will never stop loving him even should you lead lives separate from one another. And still, you have no regrets, because for a time you felt truest joy and love, and what a gift it was to share with him. 

Taking his hands from your face, he pulls you closer, your entangled limbs being woven together more complexly, your torsos now completely flushed to one another, his arms wrapped around and holding you tight, as if lessening his hold on you would cause you to dissipate. And perhaps you will disappear, but not now- not while he has you like this, not when you are where you long to be most. Your tears slow, eventually receding completely as your lips touch. 

If this is truly your last moment together, you have decided you will not spend it wallowing in sorrow- you will enjoy all you can, you will memorize every detail, you will etch it in your very soul. “Are you warm enough?” Changbin asks after he separates from you, but still close enough that his breath lingers on your lips. “Could be warmer,” you answer and he chuckles softly, kissing you again, his hands roaming down the expanse of your body, to your hips. 

“Want me to add more to the fire?” he asks, a playful lilt in his voice as he knows that’s not what you’re insinuating. While you normally speak quite openly and honestly, you become.. meek within intimate moments. Changbin always finds it incredibly cute, how you dance around what you mean, waiting for him to get the hint and give you what you want. He always gets the hint, but it’s fun to see your blush grow hotter, to see you stumble with your words when he plays dumb about what you mean, or purposely misunderstands just to make you state what you want clearly. 

“It certainly wouldn’t hurt, but..” you trail off, chewing on your lip nervously as you meet his eyes again. He raises his brow but says nothing, smiling patiently as he waits for you to speak your mind. What a menace, you think, he always does this when he realizes you want to be intimate with him. However, he doesn’t intend to waste too much time making you flustered and teasing; it’s just.. if this is the last time like you seem to believe, then he wanted to see it again now, before the opportunity was lost to him. 

“I’ve missed you a lot, you know. I want you to touch me,” you finally answer and he coos, furthering the embarrassment you feel as heat rushes to your face. But better than being cold like you were earlier, you suppose; maybe you should welcome his teasing, since it never fails to make your face and body hot. “You missed me, darlin’? I missed you too,” he smiles, kissing your face, your lips, your jaw, your neck, “thought about you every damn day.” 

His low voice near your ear makes you shudder, his soft kisses down your neck, to your shoulder, furthering the feeling. You never let him mark your skin, afraid of what consequences would come from your mother finding out what you’d been doing, but you’re tempted to let him tonight- if you’re going to be punished regardless, why not be selfish, go out with a display? “Binnie, leave a mark on me, please,” you shamelessly plead, using the nickname you know he loves to hear you speak. 

Changbin lifts his head from your shoulder, meeting your gaze with uncertain excitement. God, he’d love to, but.. “Are you certain? What of your mother?” he asks carefully, pushing your hair behind your neck to expose more of your skin. He may be apprehensive out of concern, but the minute you make it clear you have no reservations, he’s obliging without restraint, giving you everything you ask- anything you want, you’ll have it. 

“I don’t care what she thinks anymore, I want her to know that I.. have someone I love,” you answer sincerely, and he smiles, his heart feeling like it’s expanding in size. “You love me?” he asks, and you return his smile as you nod, because though you were scared to tell him, you are glad you did. His reaction to the information was completely worth it, his eyes sparkling with deep emotion and fondness for you. 

“I love you too. More than you probably know,” he says, mirroring what he said when he confessed that he liked you too, and he lets you pull him into a kiss, your affection radiating. There’s a soft giggle that escapes him, not being able to help how giddy your love makes him feel, how you love him despite what people in your life expect from you. If he could, he’d assure them all how well he’d take care of you, how he’d make sure you never suffered a day in your life because of him. He suspects your mother doesn’t care much about your happiness, but if she did, if she gave him the chance to prove it, he wouldn’t rest until he gave you the entire world, until she could see your love as true. 

You lay your head back to the pillows, tilting it comfortably so that Changbin has more access to your skin. His breath warms you, and you all but tremble with anticipation when you feel his lips on you again, knowing your skin will finally bear his mark after all this time. You’ve seen such a mark briefly on your maids that you know to have lovers, how they try to hide them with their hair or makeup, the sort of shame and embarrassment they feel when they realize you’ve noticed it.

You will have no such shame; you will wear them proudly, in a show that is simultaneously of love and rebellion. I have and I know love, and that is all that matters. People will certainly have opinions, but you’ve sacrificed enough to them. If there is only one day you can live selfishly, you want it to be this day; and even as the marks fade, they will serve as a reminder of what you once had. 

He plants open mouthed kisses to your neck, the feeling of his tongue and teeth grazing you adding to the anticipation you feel. Your fingers tangle in his dark, unruly curls, as he carefully, almost gently, sucks and bites at your supple skin, leaving behind a string of beautiful, red, blue, and purple bruises. There’s a tinge of pain, yes, but the excitement grows beyond the subtle sting, transforming it almost entirely into pleasure. 

When Changbin’s finished with one side, he lies you on your back and does the same to the other, your eyes fluttering closed as you tilt your head for him to have more room to work. You unintentionally tug on his hair when his teeth meet a particularly sensitive spot, and you would’ve apologized had he not groaned in delight from the feeling. You learned something new about him every time you were intimate, and this discovery in particular had your stomach flipping.

“Want you to take it off,” he mumbles in reference to your dress, pulling at the fabric that had begun to bunch up at your thighs. You hum, detangling your hand from his hair and letting him sit up, watching as he lifts his own shirt up and over his head, tossing it aside. In all the times you’ve seen Changbin’s skin bare, you never stopped being amazed at how divine he looked. He was so big and strong, it always left you breathless, his cute, soft stomach a direct contrast from the bulk in his arms and chest. And then there was the small patch of hair that led from his belly button to the waistband of his trousers that always left you hungry to see the rest of him. 

Still feeling a bit weak from your exertion prior, you ask Changbin to help you remove your dress, which he is more than happy to do. He’s careful with the fabric, though you’ve decided you don’t care about it at this particular moment, and he sets it aside with much more care than he did his own clothing. What a gentleman he is, you think, taking the extra time to care for your clothes even when he’s met with you bare before him.

Well, not entirely bare- you still have your undergarments on, and after deciding you’d see Changbin today no matter what, you purposely wore your prettiest pair. A beautiful, intricate and delicate white lace, one you might aspire to wear on your wedding night. He looks you over in awe, taking in all your details. You were always beautiful, but your choice in clothing somehow enhances it, drives his excitement even further. 

“Fuck, you’re stunning. How did I get so lucky?” Changbin questions aloud and you smile, a soft giggle escaping you as he leans back down to kiss you. “Take your pants off too, otherwise it isn’t fair,” you playfully complain and he grins, letting out a chuckle of his own as lifts himself back up. “Maybe I spoil you too much, giving you everything you want so easily,” he responds to your complaint with one of his own, trying not to smile so that he appears serious- though you are easily able to read that he’s playing around, just as you were. 

“You give me everything I want because I’m a good girl for you though, right?” you ask and he groans audibly; you admitted early on in your sexual relationship that you were curious about being called such things, and when he tried it out, it was discovered that he liked saying it just as much as you liked being called it. It’s not just saying it to you that he likes either- hearing you call yourself one, saying it’s just for him.. that’s what really gets him going. 

He doesn’t want to be presumptuous and say you belong to him, especially not after all you’ve suffered through, but he definitely belongs to you. You don’t anticipate Changbin pulling his underwear down with his trousers, but the sight of his cock is never unwelcome. It’s already hard and leaking, and when he leans down to you once again, you can feel it pressing against your bare thigh, smearing its fluid on your skin. It always excites you, how hard he gets from your body, and while you are normally much more timid, you’re enjoying getting him riled up quickly. 

“You’re dangerous,” he says with a small huff, and before you can come back with more words to make his cock throb, he’s kissing you again, this time wasting no time with softness and shoving his tongue past your lips. You welcome it, opening your mouth for him, letting his tongue tangle with yours. The feeling always makes you light-headed in the most delicious way possible- it’s intoxicating to put it simply, and you would kiss him for hours and hours if given the chance. 

His hands come to your bra, unhooking it easily after all the practice he’s had, and though he could easily toss it aside, he breaks away long enough to set it down gently. You giggle at how he’s still treating your clothes with care even while this hard and eager, but that’s what makes you love him so much. Returning to your mouth, he nips and sucks at your bottom lip, and you mewl at the sting, which Changbin always gladly soothes with his tongue before repeating. 

His fingers roll, pinch, and tug your nipples, not too hard, but enough to have you whining and squeezing your legs together. They were always so sensitive in Changbin’s rough, calloused hands, and there were times you felt you could cum simply from the stimulation of them alone, especially when he used his mouth. And he did just that when he pulled away to stop kissing you, though not right away.

He kissed all over your chest, leaving love bites and sucking small, almost delicate bruises onto the sensitive skin of your breasts, not yet touching your nipples with his tongue and teeth. You told him to mark you, and it seems he was determined to do it everywhere- not that you had any objections. It was a bit strange, seeing your chest bitten and the color of your flesh changed, but you equally enjoyed it, loved the physical proof that Changbin was on you. 

When his tongue finally swirled around one of your nipples, you let out a breathy moan that quickly turned into a drawn out whimper when he used his teeth to carefully tug. He made sure not to hurt you too overtly, to just give you enough of that sweet sting you found so enticing and pleasurable, and in return you gave him that same delicious feeling by tugging on his hair every time you felt good. 

Your panties were soaked by the time he stopped giving your breasts attention, and though you hadn’t reached your peak from the stimulation, you felt so close. Resuming his path down your body, Changbin’s cock throbs and twitches when he’s met with evidence of your excitement, your white panties darkened by how damp they’ve become. He doesn’t pull them down right away- he kisses your legs first, and then your thighs, leaving behind the same kisses and marks he gave to your chest and neck. 

Your inner thighs are especially sensitive, and it causes you to jolt and whine when he sinks his teeth into the meat of them. He’s got you so impossibly worked up, you feel like you could cry when he finally gives your neglected heat the attention it craves. He praises you before he slides your panties down your legs, and there’s a relieved sort of noise coming from your throat that makes Changbin chuckle. 

You keen when his tongue finally slips between your folds, licking and sucking up everything you have to offer him. There’s an enthusiastic hum that leaves his lips when your fingers tangle in his hair again, followed by a groan when you pull and tug. Your legs are trembling and twitching so much, constantly threatening to lose around his head, that he has to push them down to keep you how he wants you.  

It’s when his tongue meets your clit that you really start to lose yourself, your hips jolting up and back arching, legs quivering when he wraps his lips around it and sucks. You’re panting, begging him, incoherently mumbling and babbling about how close you are, and within seconds you’re seeing white, eyes rolling back as further wetness gushes on his face. He licks your release up with another eager hum, dragging out the feeling until you’re a quivering, overstimulated mess beneath him. 

You release your hold on his curls when you finally come down from your high and your body relaxes, opening your eyes to see Changbin grinning at you, evidently proud of the fact that he got you to cum in record time. He kisses you softly, quick and chaste, not trying to hinder you from taking any of the breaths you need, just wanting to show his affection. “What do you want next, darlin’? Since I’m givin’ you everything you want,” he asks, rubbing soothing circles on your skin as he awaits your answer.

“W-Want to be on top but.. I’m still feeling pretty weak. Especially after that,” you reply with a slight blush, and he chuckles again, cooing at you as if you’re just so sweet and cute (and to be fair, you are. At least to him.) “S’okay sweetheart, I can help you,” Changbin says sweetly, giving you one more kiss before he’s lying down on the makeshift bed and pulling you on top of him. Your legs are on either side of them, his hands on your hips, looking up at you with pure affection. 

“This good? Comfortable?” he asks, and you hum with a nod, smiling just a bit as you lean down to kiss him again. Normally, given how thick he is, Changbin would prep you before having you take his cock, but given how wet and excited you are, he doesn’t think the prep is as necessary (and you might not be patient enough for it after all the build up to this point regardless.) He helps you line yourself up with his cock, both of you letting out your own shaky noises as you sink down on him. 

“Atta girl, keep goin’, just like that, sit on me all the way,” he encourages you, and you do just as he asks, your hands tightly gripping his biceps to ground and support yourself as you sit flush with his body, the back of your thighs meeting the top of his. He rubs your thighs and legs, trying to show soothing affection as you adjust and settle, listening attentively to all the trembling exhales and noises you make. 

You look so beautiful atop him, illuminated in the gentle, warm glow of the fireplace, your hair having fallen in a way that messily, yet somehow perfectly, frames your face. He can see everything- your breasts, your stomach, your thighs, beautifully painted with all the marks he left behind. You can feel him twitching and throbbing inside you, but he doesn’t rush you along, lets you take all the time you need. 

You feel him twitch again when you lean down to kiss him, and it’d make you giggle if it also didn’t make a wave of pleasure shoot through your body. You move your hands to his chest to support your own weight better, experimentally rolling your hips as you coax your tongue into his mouth. He lets out a groan from deep in his chest as you move, his tongue wasting no time in meeting and dancing with yours, his fingers squeezing at the already tender meat of your thighs. 

You lift yourself back up to begin moving in earnest, your hands still planted firmly on his chest for support as you slide yourself up and down his length. The slow pace, while it still feels good, isn’t enough for either of you, and soon enough you find yourself practically bouncing on his cock, the sound of your thighs repeatedly slapping down on his echoing into the room. Changbin curses, biting his lip as he watches you, using his hands to help guide you up and down, trying to ease some of the ache in your legs. 

He thrusts upward into you when your pace starts to stutter and lose rhythm, and you gasp, eyes rolling back as he hits the perfect spot again and again. It reaches a point where his hands simply hold you in the right place while he exerts all his effort, feet planted firmly on the ground while he does all the work from below. Your nails dig into his skin, head falling back as you feel your release building up again. 

Changbin effortlessly flips your positions, though he is careful not to hurt you in his haste- he just wants to make you fall apart again, and it’s easier to do that if he doesn’t have to control your movements- just his own. He resumes the pace he held from below, bringing two of his fingers to your clit and rubbing in quick circles, unable to help the way he groans when he feels you clench around him even tighter in response. 

“B-Bin, please, Binnie, so close,” you babble and whine, your hands twisting the blankets beneath you. “I know sweetheart, let go, be a good girl and give it to me,” he grunts out, and again, you feel white hot pleasure coursing through your veins, your vision blurring and mind growing fuzzy as you let go. “Good girl, just a little more, just need you to hang on for a little more,” he both instructs and praises, pulling out just long enough to flip you to your stomach, pushing back into your heat just as quickly as he left it. 

You whimper loudly, fingers clutching desperately at the pillow your head rests on, Changbin bringing a hand around your body to lift your hips ever so slightly. He was hitting your spot deliciously from this angle, the pleasure so great that tears once again pricked the corners of your eyes, threatening to fall with each gasp and whimper you released. You turn your head back as much as you can, delighted in the visage of Changbin’s head thrown back in pleasure, 

He always got rougher when he started to get close, his hands always tightening their grip, his thrusts, while growing less rhythmic, became harsher and faster, almost desperate, and it was always a treat to experience. You loved watching him lose himself to the pleasure, loved that it was you and your body that brought him there, loved how his grunts and groans transformed into higher pitched whimpers and whines. 

You bring your own fingers to your clit, wanting to let him enjoy and focus on his release since he already spent so much time on your pleasure. He leans forward, his chest pressed into your back, his hot breath hitting your ear, his whines and praises pouring directly into it. “Fuck, sweetheart, feel so good, ‘m gonna- fuck, gonna fill you up,” he stammers out, and it sends a shiver down your spine, your stomach erupting in countless butterflies, driving you to speed up the motion of your fingers. 

You release again with a strangled cry, gushing around his length and on your fingers. Changbin follows closely behind, the feeling of you clenching and squeezing around him as you cum for the third time sending him over his peak. He releases in long, drawn out spurts, both of you breathless and exhausted when he collapses next to you. You both know you should get cleaned up, but you’re both too tired to care, and he can always clean up his messes in the morning. For now, he just wants to stay close, here in front of the fire, with you. 

This very well could be your last night together, but he doesn’t want to believe it is. He wants to believe that the two of you can find a solution somehow, that after all the hardship, you’ll be smiling at him in the end. There’s a part of you that doesn’t even want to fall asleep at all- you want to stay up all night, to not waste a single moment you have left, to stare and feel and love until the very last second, so that he’ll remember him clearly always. 

You do your best to not become teary eyed again, having promised yourself you wouldn’t spend your night with him wrapped up in your sorrow and dread. But oh, how you wish there was more time, how you wish that your mother would understand you, that you could have just this one thing. But you suppose for a girl with immense responsibility, happiness is too much to ask for. You sacrifice your happiness so that others may have it instead- as noble an act as any, but you selfishly wish you could have both; the people’s happiness and your own. 

The idea of running away still leaves you torn, even after all this time. You don’t want to let anyone down.. but still, you have to ask yourself, is doing what’s right for your family and future worth all this heartache? If it’s what is right, why does it make your heart feel as if it’s been shattered like glass? You’ve been told in life that the right thing to do is never the easiest, but you can’t imagine that in this case, walking away from either side is right. 

You want both. Is that truly so wrong? You want to be a ruler worthy of her name and title, and you want Changbin. Why must you choose one over the other? As far as you’re aware, even now, Changbin doesn’t know you’re the princess. He’ll likely find out soon, when every knight in the town is floundering to find you come morning, when they realize you’re gone. You should slip away before then, lest your lover be met with undue scrutiny and unfair treatment from your mother and other nobles. 

But looking at him now, even still.. you don’t want to leave. You’ll never want to leave. “Sweetheart,” Changbin calls softly, his hand reaching up to leave comforting, lingering touches to your head. “I can tell what you’re thinkin’. But don’t be sad yet, not ‘til we’ve said goodbye.” You blink away the accumulating tears with a nod, swallowing down the lump in your throat the best you can and burying your face into Changbin’s welcoming body. 

You’re so, so tired, and you know he is too, but he’s trying his best for you. And he’s being the strong one despite how much his heart aches with yours. He rubs your head, kisses your temple, tells you he loves you. Your heart breaks and mends all at once; how bittersweet this moment is.. If you’re lucky, you have about 7 hours until anyone realizes you’re gone. Maybe you can sleep for just a few, just enough to get some of this ache out of your body, and then you can spend the rest with Changbin. 

You’ll cry, you know, as soon as you depart back home. You’ll cry when the hole in the castle’s defenses is completely sealed. You’ll cry when you look to the fields his home sits on from the bedroom window. Still.. you do your best to uphold your promise to yourself, and now to Changbin. You won’t cry, and you won’t be upset- not yet, anyways. Not until you’ve actually parted ways. For now, you’ll continue to lie in his arms, continue to express your love for him, continue to smile and laugh as if this isn’t the end, until morning comes and reminds you painfully that it is. 

How beautiful it was to love Seo Changbin, to learn and to grow and to really live with his help, patience, and care. How fondly you’ll miss him in every moment, how lovingly you’ll always hold his memory. Brief though your love together is, much shorter than it should have been, it has changed you for the better, and you’ll never regret it, even should your heart ache. And maybe Changbin is right; maybe there is room for hope, and maybe you’ll see each other again much sooner than you allow yourself to think. No matter what lies before you, there is one thing for certain; Changbin is your first love, and he’ll forever be etched in your heart- your lover, your deepest connection, your closest confidant. And how grateful you are to have known him.

[rinbowaman]

S E 7 E N : P R O L O G U E - P A R T 1 N E

M A S T E R L I S T

Yay it's finally here! kind of a long chapter, so it's in parts!

Warnings: MDNI18+ Sexual assault, sexual harassment, religion, angels and demons, mentions of hell, angels are bad guys, demons are good guys, sinful pleasures, dry humping, fingering, making a deal with the devil.

“Hey y/n, go ahead and take these, we have to dispose them.”

“But…why?”

“The government has aligned with Senator Forras’s decree and that all scriptures, novels, and materials that contain any mentions of supernatural forces, any other type of religion, or mentions of demons are to be banned and disposed. The officials are making the rounds to do a thorough inspection of every establishment, so we need to get rid of them.”

You frowned as you received a handful of books, some were enjoyable for you to read, and yet you had to bid them farewell as you tossed them into a large bin that was arranged to be picked up later in the week. It was filled with piles and piles of books, some of which were classics.

‘What a shame…’

There were many people, like yourself, that questioned the belief and mission of Voia Domnului, the overly powerful cult that started out as small group led by overly, self-righteous religious ‘freaks’ that proclaimed the world has sinned. The cult was, and continues to be led by Michael Forras, who now is the self proclaimed Senator.

At first, the world deemed the cult just like any other, a bunch of lunatics that blabbed out religious nonsense of how everything was a sin, that everyone has sinned. They were harmless, for the most part, the only concern was getting them to stop blocking roads and clear passage of major establishments since they had often protested in mass groups, rather angrily, nearly every single day.

Forras, used to be viewed as a man who lacked any common and good sense. You recalled the moment he appeared in the media, speaking of how he personally ‘knew the Lord’ and that a day of reckoning was breaching. Every day when you were on your way to work, you would overhear the things that the community used to say about him…

‘What a joke, can you believe this guy?’

‘My wife says that she went to high school with that guy, he was just as nutty back then as he is now.’

‘I can’t believe people are buying into his bullshit.’

Now, things are different…much different.

He no longer was just the cult’s leader, but he controlled the city, the country…he was even on his way in leading the continent as people swarmed around him with their devotion and loyalty, although you wonder if it was just merely out of fear from him…or the angels.

Ever since the day where those…monsters had appeared, God only knows if anyone ever heard you reflect what your true outlook was, you’d disappear like the rest of the ‘non-believers’, as society has now called them.

People who had rational sense, a lot of them still had believed and enveloped religion and the belief of God, yet the moment they reflected their voices out and claimed that the events occurring between the angels and ‘the selected’ to be questionable, each one disappeared and was never seen again. Anyone who also spoke out against the Voia Domnului or the Senator, were also considered heretics. If anyone mentioned how the non-sensible actions of the ‘Angels’ and Senator Forras’ will, was a tactic of control and a coordination of inheriting power and wealth, would surely die by the hands of Forras’ cult members, or so you suspect, since many of them would disappear overnight.

When it came to your true outlook, you believed in a higher power, you believed in God and you never took it upon yourself to follow the Bible strictly, but you carried out your life being a naturally respectable and caring person. Whenever someone needed help, you were there for them. Should someone need money to help buy groceries, you aided them. You made countless donations, helped promote education and success for the youths of the city, and even volunteered at local orphanages. You weren’t by any means, a bad person, or a sinner. You were just human, but a good one.

December 2nd of last year, things had changed. The world had changed.

You’ll never forget as you were on your way to the Pacific Archives, a historical public library that you used to enjoy working at, not anymore.

Often, you were always reading the books as you worked, enjoying the amount of creativity found in the hidden gems of each shelf, each genre.

You were an active college student, back when advanced education wasn’t considered a ‘sin’, so it only made perfect sense to work at the library where you could continue your studies and find time to do homework while getting paid.

The building had two floors, the upper being the library itself, and the first floor was the massive café and shopping center.

Just like any other day, you went downstairs to grab your favorite drink. The barista, Lily, was one of your best friends, she started to work at the café once she heard there was an opening during one of her visits while you were at work.

You both had laughed and enjoyed a conversation as you sipped on your white hot-chocolate mocha flavored drink, when suddenly another barista’s voice pierced the lounge.

“Everyone! Look at the TV!”

Everyone’s eyes shifted their gaze towards the massive wide screen smart television that was mounted on the wall, turning up the volume, the staff and customers all watched in horror as the media played countless footage that was filmed of what happened, not too far from where you worked.

“This is Stacy Holcomb from Channel Nine news, here reporting of the… abnormal event that is taking place….you can see behind me as the camera crew are trying their best to take footage of what seems to be….a humanoid figure approaching a single man on the street. The mysterious entity has been seen targeting this man, and has been conducting serious bodily harm against him, paramedics and aid have been thrown out of sight each time they go near to save the man….it looks like-“ “OOOH MY GOOOOOOD!!!!”

The shrilled screams in the background took over the audio as the elongated, almost alienlike features of the entity brutally took the man’s head off...slowly. It’s hand mutated into that a of a blade, resembling a machete as it sawed it’s way through the man’s flesh. It wasn’t a clean cut, to say that it had decapitated the man was an understatement…it tore his head off…ripping it from his body after sawing it halfway through.

The cameras shifted the lens to the ground afterwards, indicating that the crew was running away upon filming what had just transpired.

“What….the fuck???” The barista exclaimed out in horror.

Everyone, including yourself, were left speechless. Some of the customers were crying, while others were in shock. You felt your heart drop, there was a sense of fear and curiosity that you found its way lodged deep within your chest.

‘What….was that?’

It wasn’t until later that day, when Forras came out publicly and announced that the mysterious entity, was God’s own angel. Being someone who self-claimed as the mediator of God’s guardians, he elaborated the structure of the ‘execution’ as justice served for the sinful actions that the deceased had committed while alive.

“I have seen God…I speak to him and his guardians. The Angels have come to cleanse the world, because we have taken many offenses against God’s holy rule and spat in his face as we continue to tarnish his good will. Those of us who have lived amongst the sinners, the filthy beings that keep offending his holy will, have tried to warn you all. Now is the time, I ask you to all believe in the will of Voia Domnului! Believe in our decree! We have preached time and time again that God’s will is en-route, and it has now finally come! We ask for you all to join us! Become a part of God’s will and help aid our mission in getting all sinners to repent and accept their fate, so that we may once again live in a world where only truth and God’s holy name is preached!”

Everyone was in disbelief, no one knew what to believe or what to do. However, as the days went on, more people were targeted, or as Senator Forras had claimed, they were ‘selected’. It didn’t take long for people to switch sides and start to find comfort by joining Voia Domnului, in hopes that they would save themselves from either the cult members or the angels.

“The angels know of your sins! It is futile to hide! Let it be known that once the angels have selected you based off your series of offense towards God, you too will be publicly executed, so we at Voia Domnului ask you, to repent now, as you too will be selected to die in his holy name.”

Maybe there was some truth in what he said, or maybe it was just fear and desperation, either way, at the time, you weren’t entirely sure what to believe. You remained as calm as possible, given that the world had lost it’s good sense. You tried your best to not lose yourself out of fear, but it was hard. It didn’t take long, but you found yourself as the lone wolf, where unlike the rest of the world, where everyone was hysterical, everyone feared that they were next to be selected, you continued to live your life with as much of a positive mindset that anyone could have while living through this excruciating period in world history.

You tried…and you were doing so well, but things had gotten worse.

Almost as if it happened over night, everything changed in an instant. The world felt cold, and empty, there were many times you felt like you were the last person standing as you would take a look around and notice that the route to work looked different. People looked different. The sky…the ground…everything…everything looked different.

No one went out anymore, the streets laid empty as the cult encouraged for society to lay dormant in their homes, as going out, especially at night, was considered a sin. So much, that the cult gained favor and authority, powered by the government to assign long standing members of the cult as high profiled officials. They assigned random members to roam the streets at night, as an established curfew was enforced, no one was allotted to be out passed 10pm. Not only that, but other activities and sources were all banned and punishable by death had anyone breached said bans.

Social media was banned because it was a sin, TV was a sin, music that wasn’t approved by Voia Domnului was a sin, certain foods that were known to be an indulgence of the devil, such as chocolate and apples were a sin. Personal opinions were a sin. Books, talk radio, internet, and all other forms of entertainment was a sin. Everything…everything was a sin.

While you thought it was over the top, you hadn’t formulated your own opinion on what had happened on December 2nd, you remained impartial for the most part, as you watched people, friends, and family all succumbing to Senator Forras’ will and join Voia Domnului in order to be ‘saved’. Even Lily.

“You should join us, it’s, a really good group. It makes sense once you complete their course requirements.”

“Course…requirements?” you raised a brow at Lily’s statement.

“Yeah, when you join, you have to take a pledge and then they put you through a 3-month course where you cleanse your body and learn the will of God.”

You shook your head subtly as you listened to her talk about the cult…or as she liked to put it, the ‘group’ since cult would have been considered a derogatory term for Senator Forras righteous figures.

“No…I don’t know…I just…I don’t know what to think yet. I just want to-“

“Shhh!!!!” Lily harshly shushed you.

“Y/n…you can’t talk like that. Say what you will about other matters but do not talk like that…otherwise you’ll be considered a non-believer.”

Recalling the events that surmised where the public speakers that defied the cult’s leading and Senator Forras’ actions, you heeded Lily’s warning. You didn’t want to disappear like they did, God only knows what happened to them as Lily, being a part of Voia Domnului, didn’t even know. It was against the rules to speak of such matter to the cult leaders.

“Just…think about it, okay? I don’t want you to get selected.” She gingerly tells you as she rubbed your hand. “We need each other…we’re all we’ve got in the world now. You’re my best friend and I just want us to stay that way.”

You nodded as you hugged her. For a moment, you sincerely did consider it, not because you believed in the decree of Voia Domnului, but more so because of Lily’s words.

But then your world shattered that following week….when Lily was selected.

“y/n! Please-please listen to me real quick-“

“Lily….what’s wrong?” you looked at her with great concern as she appeared before your doorstep, hysterically crying, face swollen from tears, and her voice stuttering.

“Please…just listen…umm……” she tucks in her lip as the tears built back up in her eyes once more.

“…I…I’ve been selected…”

Your eyes widened…your heart skipped a beat and your breath held in upon hearing her words.

“…no…..no….”

“Yes….I..I’ve been selected…y/n…” her voice trailed off.

“No…Lily! No! Y-you can’t be-“

“No I was…..I came home today and…there was the message written in blood on my wall.”

The message…was always delivered in the same manner to those that got selected prior to. A message written in the walls of their home, their work, or even on buildings in the street; the words were always drafted in blood, no one knows whose or where the blood came from, but it would always be fresh as the message would have drips that trailed down, catching the public’s eye. It would always have the selectee’s name, followed by ‘7 days.’ Only seven days…until each one of them died.

“Y/n…I’m scared….i can’t tell the group…I cant-“

“Lily…there’s gotta be a mistake. Do you know anyone else that has the same name? What if-“

“No……y/n…..it is me….they’re going to come for me….”

Your heart sank as you placed your hands on her shoulders, tears streaming down your face.

She really truly was the only person you had left in this world, you grew distant from your family ever since they joined the cult, they had refused to associate with you unless you joined them. But your heart never felt it true to be a part of an organization that promotes death in such a manner, regardless of the deceased being sinners or offenders against God…how could someone like sweet, wonderful Lily be selected?…How could she ever be…?

“No….please…..don’t leave me…not like this….this can’t happen….”

“Y/n…please….please hold me I’m so scared.”

You tightly embraced her. She had stayed at your place for most of her remaining days, and you watched as her persona had changed. She had remained quiet and aloof; she wouldn’t eat, she wouldn’t sleep, and she wouldn’t talk, until the sixth day, 24 hours before her proposed execution…

“Y/n…I’m leaving…I’m going to inform Senator Forras…”

“Lily…there has to be a way out of this…I’ve known you my whole life, you’ve never hurt anyone! You’ve gone to church every weekend; I’ve never been to church and I’m still here. In a lot of ways when it comes to praising God, you’re a better person than I am. Please….”

She merely shook her head. Dark circles under her eyes, her lips pale and crusty from lack of moisture as she refrained from even drinking water. It was as if she wanted to die before the angels did the deed.

You stayed silent…she was already moving towards the door. Reaching for the knob, she turns to you before opening it.

“Y/n…you’re my best friend…and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I have to leave you alone…I’ve accepted what’s going to happen…there is no choice. Just please…take care of yourself, and look after my family….but also…” she pauses for a moment, as she hiccups the sobbing tears and stuttered cries of her voice as her head dips down.

“Y/n….i never did anything…..you’re right….i may not have been perfect but I am not a sinner. I even joined this stupid cult….but it doesn’t matter….it was all wasted. Please…if for some chance…if the world goes back to normal someday…please let everyone know that I am not…I’m not a-“

You nodded, knowing full well what she was talking about. “I know you’re not Lily…you’re not….”

Both of you broke down.

You wanted to hug her once more, but you found it hard to even move. With a sad smile, she whispers “take care…” before leaving.

The media had a habit of promoting Senator Forras’ decree by filming and disbursing the footage of each execution, as a method to set the example of what surmises if you’ve sinned. You’ve never went out of your way to watch the profiles of each selectee on the day of their execution, but there were times when in passing or out and about, you would glance at the large billboard that aired the awful events. A glimpse of a man’s body being torn apart, or a woman being burned alive, there were countless methods that the creatures took in carrying out the deed.

The day Lily died, ou never watched what happened to her, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it, so you stayed at home that day, refraining from exposing yourself to the public at risk of overhearing about her death. You had shut the world out, and narrowed yourself into a corner, all so you didn’t have to hear….you didn’t want to know how they did it…not with her.

Not long after Lily’s death, was when the Senator banned education. Schools for younger children was regulated by the cult members, colleges and universities alike were all shut down, and while they hadn’t forced it…yet you sense that the risk of losing your job was near since you were the only one that hadn’t taken the pledge and joined Voia Domnului.

“Y/n! The Senator! The Senator is coming! He wants to see the library!”

Your eyes widened with concern.

‘Why does he want to come here?...I hope it’s not because he knows that i was friends with Lily…does he? He already thinks she’s a sinner, is he going to assume I’m one too? Are they going to ask me why I didn’t join Voia Domnului?’

You caught yourself overthinking, though that wasn’t hard to do since everyone in the city, the country, and the entire continent, walked on eggshells. Yourself including. For if it wasn’t the angels that you had to worry about, it was Senator Forras and his posse that performed their own manner of executions towards non-believers.

“Everyone! He’s coming up! All of you stand in a line-“ the head staff looks at you. “Y/n…you stand at the very end, out of the doorway. If he asks you, just tell him that you’re going to join Voia Domnului, but don’t say anything else.”

You nodded. You knew the staff had your best interest at heart, though they often times reprimanded you and would always try and convince you to join, yet you refrained. Especially since, not long after Lily’s death, selectees were reaching in the younger ages. Children…babies in fact, some of which hadn’t lived for more than 8 hours, were getting selected.

‘How can a child be a sinner?��

It seemed like no one cared; everyone paid no mind to that fact. It was as if everyone was just looking out for themselves. Since you had worked here for quite some time, the staff looked at you as family, like a daughter almost. You appreciated the gestures and them trying to look out for you, but deep down, you followed your heart. Somehow you knew…there was something more to what was happening, even though it was a gut feeling, and you could very well be wrong, you just somehow had this hunch that something wasn’t right.

“Alright, he’s coming. Everyone just stand and he’s going to do a walkthrough, apparently, he wanted to see how the inspection is being done and he chose our library.”

Everyone nods and stands, shaking. You weren’t sure if everyone was excited for their ‘group’ leader or if they were just fearful that he may find something in the archives that violates his will, which of course he believed to be God’s own.

You and the staff spent five days clearing out the library, it looked so vast and empty now. The shelves would only contain a scarce number of books.

‘Can you even call this a library anymore?’

The double doors were opened by a security team as Senator Forras walks in. He was a taller man, older, possibly in his fifty’s and had a very sharp and pointed nose. He had short dark hair and looked to be of average built.

He was dressed in extreme luxury, with a high branded suit and tie, along with fine leather shoes, a large overcoat draping his shoulders, and assorted diamond rings decorating each finger, the man looked to be living a grand lifestyle.

‘How….interesting…’

Your voice issued a hint of skepticism as you minded your thoughts in your head. Wasn’t this man supposed to be the temperance and modest type? Why is he dressed so lavishly?

“Ah! Staff…members of the community, thank you for welcoming me here today. It is truly a blessing to see you all here doing God’s work.”

The staff members issued out their gratitude and continued the conversation as they offered the Senator his tour.

All went well, and by ‘well’ you only meant that the Senator had looked pleased and kept nodding with approval as the tour continued. You and the rest of the staff members continued with your tasks, as the main head of the library took over the tour.

“Thank you, you are doing a good thing.” The Senator issues as he takes the head staff’s hand in both of his and issues a warm and seemingly friendly hand-shake. “Continue to do his bidding.”

You snuck out as the Senator bid his farewell with the staff members, wanting to hide in the bathroom for a moment and avoid interacting with him. The last thing you wanted was to put yourself in the spotlight and be questioned on whether or not if you were a part of Voia Domnului, which you suspected he would have been able to tell seeing as you didn’t’ bear the ring that each member was gifted upon graduating the three-month course requirement.

A moment or two had passed as you stood right by the bathroom door, ear pressed up against it to see if you could hear the Senator leaving.

‘It’s probably safe for me to go back now…’

Swinging the door open, you looked to your left and saw the wide double doors propped open. Only the staff members were seen inside, back to their tasks.

‘Oh good.’

You issued a mental smile as you started to walk towards the entrance to the library, when suddenly…

“Young lady…” his voice was filled with intrigue.

P A R T 2 W O

Taglist: @deobitifull; @solstramaii

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[elapsed-spiral]

Fic Delivery Service!

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In the meantime, if you're desperate for a fic, I've got the following fics of mine available as PDFs. As an added bonus, I can send them to the email address of your choosing using the burner email account I used to make my Google Docs SMAU. In other words, if you fancy reading any of the following fics as a PDF, Stede Bonnet can send them to you! DM me if you'd like any!

Cool collaboration(s) you should read immediately:

Work Experience: what if Ed went to meet Stede when the Revenge ran aground? And what if Ed became a member of Stede’s crew? And what if things kept escalating and… Canon AU. Mature. Co-written with Shearwater.

Really no excuse for how stupid these ones are:

Watch Out, Here I Come: what if Stede had been intentionally seducing Ed? Teen

Once More, With Feeling: what if Frenchie just fixed the season 1 finale fiasco because he’s the most capable guy on the ship? Teen

Talent Show: what if Ed was crass about his sexual preferences? Explicit

Capsize on Your Thighs: what if Ed rebounded onto Calico Jack at the end of season 1? Ed/CJ and Ed/Stede (but Ed/Stede is endgame, natch). Explicit

Your Feedback is Important to Us: what if Stede started holding open cabin hours to allow the crew to air their grievances (but was also very repressed and horny over Ed)? Explicit

Oh no Ed’s working through gender/class stuff (but make it funny):

Finery: Ed gets to wear a dress, Stede spontaneously combusts. Explicit

Tell More Tales: Stede isn’t the only writer aboard the Revenge. Explicit

Lovers and Madmen: Ed is hellbent on marrying Stede. Explicit

AUs no-one asked for:

Conflict of Interest: lawyer!Stede/businessman!Ed (read: gangster). Modern AU. Explicit

Intergalactic Tango: Space Waltz AU. Mature

Trade Descriptions Act: bailiff!Ed/estate agent!Stede. Identity theft but make it meet cute. Modern AU. Teen

Baddy Zaddy: Bridget Jones’s Diary style, former porn star turned sex shop owner!Ed/still unfortunately landed gentry!Stede. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

Prize Every Time: You’ve Got Mail-y secret pen pals but also business rivals. Novel length modern AU. Explicit

Your Favourite Song: locksmith!Ed/museum curator!Stede. Kinktober fill that somehow isn’t E rated. Modern AU. Teen

Draft Letter to Restaurant Downstairs: Google Docs AU with a (slightly) interactive element. Modern AU. Teen

Blind Date: Stede and Jeffrey Fettering go on a blind date at Ed’s restaurant. I think you know where this is going. Modern AU. Explicit

Different Dimension: ficlet that crams four and a bit AUs into 850 words. Modern AU. Teen

Stuck Still: British holiday resort AU feat. events manager!Stede and bartender turned fairy!Ed (it makes sense in the story I swear). Modern AU. Explicit

On the Job: “kidnapping” meet cute (but not actually. Again, I swear it makes sense in the story). Modern AU. Teen

Starring Jason Statham: another weird meet cute, courtesy of Jack and the Fast and Furious franchise. Stede/Jack, Ed/Jack and Ed/Stede (Ed/Stede is once again end game). Modern AU. Teen

West Ham Is for Lovers: Lucius has a new job. It’s going fine. Completely, totally fine. A meet cute fic about meet cutes. Ed/Stede but also Lucius/Pete, Lucius/Fang, Lucius/Izzy and Lucius/Olu/Jim. Modern AU. Teen

Proud: Ed attends Pride to get free mum hugs, Stede attends Pride to give free dad hugs. Modern AU. Teen

Conventional: back in the 00s, Ed was in a very famous movie franchise. Nowadays, he does the convention circuit. Modern AU. Explicit

KrakenAir: Stede and the crew are heading to Benidorm to celebrate Stede coming out. That is, if Stede's all expenses spared KrakenAir flight ever departs. Modern AU. Teen

Oh no there’s been a containment breach (aka non-Blackbonnet fics):

We Do What We Like (and We Like What We Do): A brief history of Ed and Jack. Explicit (Ed/CJ)

Fealty: Stede and Izzy make one another even more miserable. Mature (Stede/Izzy)

Contra Proferentem: Ed is a high powered lawyer and Professor of Law at the University of Cambridge. Lucius is not a high powered lawyer but he is a lecturer of English Lit at the University of Cambridge. Stede own a very nice cafe. Explicit (platonic Ed/Lucius, Ed/Stede, no cheating involved)

[samueldays]

The Survivability Onion dictates that Political Science is and will be bogus.

Because a major nominal function of political science is breaching the survivability onion, particularly seeing and acquiring targets in power. (When discussing those who have left power, it's called "history".)

By construction, targets in power have the ability to interfere with this. By evolution, targets in power will interfere with this.

That sums up my thesis. It is not original, but I found this framing to be novel and concise.

To elaborate:

I am not attached to any particular chart of the Survivability Onion. It puts a funny name on principles that go back to Sun Tzu's Art of War. Here are two example charts to give the general idea.

Rephrased again: For an enemy to hurt you, he must know where you are, choose a weapon that can hurt you, aim that weapon at you, successfully fire, and land a hit. Interference in any of those steps makes it harder for the enemy to hurt you, whether that's hiding from the enemy or destroying ammunition supplies.

Some caveats apply, for example high-collateral weapons can skimp a little bit on knowing where the target is, but a grenade still has to be thrown into the right house.

When applied to people in power, "hurt" takes the form of being removed from power. The principles of the survivability onion, then, dictate that one can better remain in power by obfuscating how people might remove one from power.

Don't be seen: stay out of political science textbooks, sponsor books and courses that talk about other people, insist that power rests in other organizations. Don't be acquired: if you (or your organization) are mentioned in textbooks, look innocuous and irrelevant. Smear and discredit anyone who pays attention to you. "Conspiracy theory" is a great term here. Also, did you know you can just name organizations whatever you like? Don't be hit: if people recognize that you have substantial power and get mad at you, encourage or deceive them to oppose you in ways that do nothing. For example, trying to organize a "boycott" of a military supplier that ordinary people weren't buying from in the first place. Mislead your enemies to attack false targets. Don't be penetrated: if people manage to identify your power and organize to attack it, minimize the damage. For example, dissolve a front company which you can easily replace, because your power lies in the Rolodex. Don't be killed: don't be killed, literally and metaphorically. If you're in Congress, for example, appoint regulatory committee members who will remain on committee to enforce your will in case of your impeachment. Few people ever bother to go back and root out committee members. Organizationally, build redundancy so that the penetration and destruction of any one node does not take your entire powerbase with it.

He who has ears, let him hear! Understand why I do not name names.

Political science pretends to describe the location and operation of power. Insofar as it is accurate, it creates vulnerability. "How to take and keep power" is information that people in power would love to keep secret from their rivals. Insofar as people in power can affect political science in some way, political science will contain deceits and distractions. There is means, motive and opportunity to fuck with the field. There is selective pressure to fuck with the field.

This is not unique to any particular person or power structure. Political science is always and everywhere doomed to be a field subject to actively malicious misinformation.

There will be counterforces too: researchers genuinely interested in truth, honest politicians admitting how things work, historical events eventually passing into the realm of sine ira et studio as the contemporaries die off, lies colliding in consilience failures, and so on, resulting in some equilibrium with merely X% lies.

(Yes, Minister is in part based on a combination of 2 and 3: the posthumously published memoirs of Richard Crossman.)

[wallflowerlore]

oh yeah, just one more influencer (this time an insanely popular booktuber from my home country), who is not familiar with the universe of fanfics and treats it like a published novel, creating content based on the “polemic” and “problematic” properly tagged dark fic that many who are not in fandom gets surprised when the fic contains said dark content. and then recommending reading a translation on WATTPAD when sen links to a translation inside ao3 in the author notes before even the first chapter…..i know this fic has breached containment a long time ago and that sen has been run through a lot by people who don’t know fandom etiquette so one more person making a video is nothing new, but like i know how the general br public and br hp fandom is towards dramione and fics in general, and is not good, and if this becomes a trend with other big br bookinfluencers (and another one seems like to be considering reading it) because they feel like they *have* to to get views rather than reading because they are interested in the story (and many of the accounts will read because it’s what people talk about and i can see at least some of them being very mocking and pretentious about it) i’ll have to wade through so many annoying fanfic discourse by people who don’t care about the ship or fanfic in not just one language but two while not being able to do nothing about it.

i haven’t seen the video in the screenshot and it does seem like the creator liked the story. but it doesn’t matter that she liked it because it’s the way these booktok/booktube/booktwt approach fanfic that doesn’t sit right with me (i mean, where did you read the fic that you told someone they can find a translation on fucking wattpad rather than using the one the author linked to???). i mean, and it’s sad that sen gets all of this weight on their shoulders (i mean, this thread made me sad).

these reddit posts are more coherent about the overall situation (excluding the issue selling copies which is another problem) that summarize my opinion.

[box-architecture]

i really love your comunication knife au. it's so interesting and has it's wholesome moments. Especially for how the three have really different dynamics with it's fucked up and cute details. I love your cpunz so much!! i really like the warden!dream au with c!Q and c!Sam bc it's so fucked up but so good too. And also the idea of c!Q trying to sell c!dream's milk it's kinda funny

I thought "yes I will respond to this very coherently and well thought out" but actually I got a bad grade in Talking To People so you're getting this meme. Does this convey my affection. You're receiving love and warm blankets. Unless its Hot where you are. Then you're getting an air conditioning.

Listen Listen. You See. cPunz is objectively so fucking fun as a character. He knows he's hot shit and is fully confident in who he is as a person. He likes to murder people and there's no tragic sad reasoning for it he's just Like That. He feels emotions, like anger, so strongly but he's a master of schooling his expressions because he needs to be. Things have to be a certain way for him, no he can't tell you Why things need to be like that they just Do.

He doesn't need to wear a mask or pretend around Dream because Dream accepts him fully for the ride or die madman he is, and Punz can't lose him and live in a world where no one sees Punz, only The Mercenary only Just A Guy Who Exists only shallow smiles of friendliness but never any deeper connections because Punz is a complex and complicated person, but no one wants the Punz who complains about poor quality in jewelry, or the Punz who Hates being late to appointments, because the part of him that likes making contracts, likes things A Certain Way considers being late A Breach Of Contractual Obligation.

They don't want to put up with his quirks, his insistence on runes being carved into his friends armor, because he's got old superstitions from when he was a kid, and even if the runes he's got aren't enchantments, it makes him feel better to know he's personally carved the rune for 'protection' into their armor. Its about how Punz can and will read the trashiest novel specifically to highlight and mark it up and explain Why it sucks and how it could be improved, and he will infodump about it for hours if you let him, but only Dream does anymore, only Dream will look over his shoulder at Punz's work and ask in depth questions and let Punz ramble, genuinely makes time for Punz to be himself. Wears armor with runes that don't glow with power but were placed with love and care, and has learned to show up on time or a few minutes early because he Knows its important to Punz. People don't want to know Punz, they just like what Punz can do for them.

This was just a really long ramble that can be tldr into Punz Is Autistic. To Me.

Next time I'll ramble about the Neurodivergent Triangle and how Dream is ADHD and Sam is OCD probably. Listen its Important for you to understand the intricacies of Sam's OCD-

Ok listen you know Quackity is the sort of problematic man who would look at the stupidest shit and think "how can I turn a profit out of this" because his inner capitalist can't be contained. He's the level of cringefail man that attempts to run an mlm and ends up with 600 products he can't get rid of because no one on the server uses fragrances except Hannah who is a living fragrance diffuser that constantly smells like flowers occasionally tinged with copper. He has decided not to sell to her.

[glitched-dawn]

Aight creatures and gremlins what gay little novel should I work on when I’m done with TMS Pt. 1

[neonbrutalism]

a person that had Fnaf on her brain for years now here, lemme tell you what the Fnaf franchise contains

there’s 6 games plus ultimate custom night

there’s a VR game

there’s a mobile game called special delivery

there’s security breach game and a dlc that follows it

there’s a lot of novels and book

there’s a movie coming out in the 23rd of October this year

and they’re gonna release another VR game soon

and there’s Fnaf world

idk if I missed sum but those are the things that I remember

this must be how my parents feel when I tell them that Pokemon is the highest grossing franchise in history

[cenobittten]

Since the release of the first novel trilogy, fans have been asking what the relationship between the books and games looks like. Do they take place in the same continuity? Can details from the books be used to solve the games? Or are they unrelated, separate narrative universes?

Over time, these questions have only become more important as the last game, Ruin, begins to directly reference concepts only seen in Tales from the Pizzaplex. Now, the question of whether the books are key to understanding the games is pertinent to lore building.

So how do I see the answer to this question? Well, I think things become a lot clearer when you accept a few things.

- All books and games are products released in-universe. They are ultimately shaped and crafted by Fazbear Entertainment as 'fiction'. All are 'fictionalised' to varying degrees, with details changed to distance themselves from the real events.

- This doesn't mean that the stories are complete fiction. The events shown to us in FNAF media are 'real' but specific details and narrative points have been altered. We never see these events 'in real life', just the retellings. This is why the books and games share common events with different details - they stem from the same root inspiration but take creative liberties in the retelling.

- Even since The Fourth Closet, FNAF has been metafiction. Metafiction is where a work emphasises that the viewer is experiencing a fictional work. This often involves fourth wall breaking - such as a novel containing a character with the same name as the author. Acknowledging this makes the relationship between all FNAF media even more complicated. There are multiple layers of metafiction going on throughout the series - sometimes with worlds within worlds.

This has created multiple parallel universes where some stories overlap but they are ultimately their own self-contained narratives. As time goes on, the different series entries reference earlier media, creating complexity. This is seen especially with Security Breach & Ruin with Tales From The Pizzaplex, which blur the lines between one another.

For the interest of simplicity, the graphic I have made shows the simplest version of this theory. Arguments can be made for combining different narrative universes or separating them out further. In summary though:

- Games 1-6 are self-contained from a lore point of view - fictionalised versions of 'real events'.

- Security Breach, Special Delivery, Help Wanted and Ruin are set in a narrative universe where games 1-6 are in-canon fiction.

- The Fourth Closet and Fazbear Frights reference games 1-6 while retelling real world events. However, they are also fiction in their own right.

- Tales from the Pizzaplex is another universe encompassing all the rest of the previous FNAF entries as fiction - with question marks over Security Breach and Ruin, which could take place in the same universe but likely just have elements in common.

My line of thinking

Layer 1 universes simply retell 'real-world' events

Layer 2 universes retell 'real world' events AND comment on the greater impact of Fazbear Entertainment as a company.

Layer 3 universe retells 'real-world events' and comment on the impact of working for and living around Fazbear Entertainment. It also

Can the books be used to solve the games?

Yes and no.

Both the games and books are 'canon' but they exist as distinct narrative universes.

If you are looking to build a timeline or to understand game event specifics, you won't get very far. The books do not offer details to help solve these specific aspects - the 'retellings' of game events stand alone.

However, the books do contain clues as to the broad Fazbear universe 'real world' events from a storytelling point of view. It fleshes out characters and adds supplemental information to help understand a wider narrative.

It also provides crucial worldbuilding, revealing more about Fazbear Entertainment's various dodgy practices. While the 'unrelated' stories may seem irrelevant to solving the games, they hold concepts and clues to understanding the lore. For example, it recontextualizes early game content understanding, changing Afton from being a lone, crazed murderer to a scientist experimenting for corporate interests. This is done by revealing more of the world around him and the impact Fazbear Entertainment has on lives.

[necromeowncy]

If I weren't so nervous, I'd write this on Twitter or AO3, but you don't know how many times I've read and re-read your works. Without the slightest idea of names and events because I've never played any FF game. That doesn't stop me from enjoying reading your fics and enjoying your character. If you ever wrote a novel, I'd likely read that too.

I don't know - I just felt like sharing this. If it's not too late, I'd love it if you'd answer this. Other than Aedric & his snacks. (Which is really, really sweet in itself.) 51: What’s a nonverbal way they say I love you?

Hello anon, please don't be nervous - because I promise you I am even more of a nervous wreck! :) That being said, this is perhaps the most wonderful message I've ever received; I had no idea my writing for this ship breached containment out of the wolgraha/ffxiv tag, let alone that people were reading them that had no idea who or what a G'raha Tia or elezen even was. I woke up this morning to this anon and I almost started sobbing because it made me so happy. Thank you, truly and deeply. I don't even have the words for what this means to me. But perhaps I'll find some; be prepared for a long post!

I am, surprisingly, currently writing an original fantasy novel, and it means the world to me that folks would actually be interested in reading it. I never know if I should mention anything here on my fandom Tumblr about it, as I understand the novelist world at large sometimes looks down on fanfiction authors. But this anon made me realize I probably shouldn't dice myself up into tiny, palatable pieces in order to find respect in the writing community. So I'll talk about it here:

I'm writing a queer fantasy novel that has the tentative title of This Gift Illuminated. It's still in its early stages, and I have been going back and forth on if I'm going to self-publish or just host the story on my own website for people to read for free. For the very first time publicly, I'll share the synopsis:

The world is losing its magic.  For centuries, the human Kingdom of Meyra had one rule: those born with mageblood, known as the Gifted, must submit to the royal palace to further their study in the arcane arts. These days, mageblood is rare. So when Farin shows signs of being touched by magic, he's sent away to study in the capitol along with any other Gifted, as rare as they may be. He'd welcome this opportunity with open arms, especially since it means corresponding letters with a mysterious magics expert named Elias. The nation that had long given up on magic now has a new hope.  In the elf kingdom of Rime, Elias remains the only person stubbornly dedicated to the study of the arcane. Having lost the last of their magic decades ago, the elves have built a thriving nation with the ingenuity of technological marvels. Elias's many letters to the aging human mages of Meyra have been met with silence and dismissal - until one day his letters are answered by a newly appointed Gifted. Perhaps this Farin is the key to unlocking why both of their peoples have been losing touch with the arcane - as well as save the human kingdom before they suffer the same magic-bereft fate.  This Gift Illuminated is a tale of love and learning in a changing world.

Two scholars in different nations fall in love after exchanging letters for years. They are nerds. There are elves and magic, as this seems to be my wheelhouse, so I'm going to stay aboard the "awkward elf nerd and excitable wizard" train as long as I can. I may post more about this on my personal Tumblr @thewizardtower ! I'm thinking of sharing some of the prose, but I'm unsure. Who knows, I might be brave and share the prologue!

And, at last - your wolgraha prompt! Thank you for this.

51. What’s a nonverbal way they say I love you?

Aedric and G'raha both share the love language of touch. Oftentimes, they'll both be reading side-by-side. Even if they're reading separate books entirely, they'll still manage to sit close enough that their knees will brush, or their shoulders will lean against one another, or their spare fingers will interlace - silent, save for the turning of the occasional page, or the flickering of a candle's flame. Sometimes, they'll sit in each others laps wordlessly. Or lazily comb fingers through the other's hair. Sometimes, too, G'raha's tail will wrap around Aedric, and that is perhaps Aedric's favorite. The comforting physical presence of being near each other does wonders on their healing hearts after their many trials and near-death experiences. Just knowing that the other is here within touching distance - alive, whole - is perhaps the greatest healing spell in all of Etheirys.

[nitrosodiumofficialuses]

MOTHER OF GOD, I'VE JUST HAD AN IDEA!!!

Three words: Toxic Waters Lite. That will mean nothing to anyone reading this, unless you are a small group of people who knows about Toxic Waters, my action-puzzle passion project I've been working on since September 2019. Four years later, and I can take the next step in its development. It can be my habitats game! The flooded halls of the Hydromorph research complex are an artificial habitat, after all, but the idea is SO GOOD! There will be waterborne monstrosities released from their containment, wandering the murky knee-high depths. You're an engineer stranded at ground zero when the breach occurs, and now you must run, hide, and fight your way to the top. My summer project work? That would be the Toxic Waters Lite PowerPoint interactive slideshow. Back in the early days, I used to make FNAF-style games and visual novels using PowerPoint as a rudimentary 2D engine. Now, with the powers of Unreal at my fingertips, I can make Toxic Waters Lite better than ever before.

And, perhaps eventually, Toxic Waters itself.

[chapeau-42]

The Gambler's Compromise (615 words) by Chapeau_42 Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Soul of Sovereignty (Visual Novel) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Loïc Ard & Ysmé Characters: Loïc Ard, Ysmé (Soulsov) Additional Tags: Banter, Magic, Lore - Freeform, Post-Prelude, Canon Compliant, at least for now, also featuring, A bunch of lore I made up, specifically about geography and moss, Soulsov Spoilers, the spoilers are pretty vague and mild but i'm tagging them to be safe Summary:

Continuing their journey, Loïc and Ysmé discuss the limitations of flower magic. And also moss.

-

I don't normally share much of my fic work outside of ao3, but I've liked seeing all the soulsov art going by since it became real, so I figured I might as well add my little word doodle to the mix. Hopefully someone out here will enjoy the forbidden moss lore!

In case of containment breach, soulsov real here: https://gigidigi.itch.io/soulsov