#oh my god you dont need to call someone out to kill it it eats worms youre good

[multi-fandom-imagine]

•EVEN MORE THE BLUE EYE SAMURAI INCORRECT QUOTES•

Reader: Do you ever do anything except whine like a little bitch.

Taigen: Some times I whine like a big Bitch!

Ringo: Do you think when Butterflies are in love that they feel human's in their stomach?

Reader: Ringo! What the fuck!

Reader: • • •_-• - / ... - •_• •_• -.-

Mizu: What is that

Reader: Remorse Code.

Mizu: I am even angery now.

Reader: Hey Mizu, what are you eating?

Mizu: A family sized bag of sweets.

Reader...that's not family sized....that's regular sized....

Mizu:Everything is family sized when you dont have a family.

Reader: *whispering* Mizu...nOo

Reader: *Laying in bed* Do you think birds get sad for not having arms?

Mizu: Well do you get sad for not having wings?

Reader: *Choke up* Every single day.

Taigen: If I say I love you will you say it back?

Reader: Yes

Taigen: I love you

Reader: It back

*Five Minutes later*

Mizu: Why is Taigen sobbing face down on the floor?

Reader: I wish I could block people in real life.

Akemi: Restraining order

Mizu: Murder

Reader: What are you five?

Taigen: Yea! Five head's taller than you.

Reader:

Taigen:

Reader:

Taigen:....Please don't kill me.

Mizu: Are you high?

Reader: Am I what?

Mizu: High?

Reader: Hello.

Taigen: Can you be quiet?! I'm trying to think.

Reader: Don't worry. Doing anything for the first time is difficult.

Mizu: WHOEVER CAUSED THIS MESS IS GOING TO-

Reader: It was me...

Mizu: ...Is going to be forgiven because everyone deserves a second chance.

Reader: Why are you on the floor?

Mizu: I’m depressed.

Mizu: Also I was stabbed, can you get Ringo, please

Taigen: I guess I’m just a bad person.

Reader: Nah, you’re not a bad person. You’re a terrific person. You’re my favourite person. But sometimes you can be a real cunt

Reader: Hey Mizu?

Mizu, internally: There they are. My favorite person in the world, the love of my life. Fuck I just want to stare at them and hold them and kiss them for the rest of my life—

Mizu: What the FUCK do you want?

Akemi staring at Reader: “You look like an angel.”

Reader who wasn’t paying attention: “What?”

Akemi: “I said you look ugly at every angle.”

Mizu *screeching*: YOU MEAN A LOT TO ME!

Reader: wh-

Mizu: YOU’RE ESSENTIAL TO MY EXISTENCE!

Reader:why are you screaming??

Mizu: BECAUSE I HAVE TROUBLE EXPRESSING MYSELF! IT HELPS TO YELL SENTIMENTAL THINGS IN AN AGRESSIVE TONE!

Reader: I-

Mizu: I FUCKING LOVE YOU!

Ringo: Wow, it’s a barren featureless wasteland out there isn’t it?

Reader: … Ringo, try turning the map around.

Reader: You’re mad at me.

Mizu: I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.

Reader: Oh, come on. Everyone knows that’s worse

Mizu: Don’t worry, you’ve got everything you need to defeat them.

Reader: The power to believe in myself?

Mizu: No, a Sword.

Mizu: Stab them.

Reader: Don’t kill me, I have a wife

Assassin: I don’t care about that

Reader: That wasn’t a plea for mercy, that was a warning

Mizu kicking the door down: You called, love?

Reader: Here you are, Mizu. Nice hot cup of tea.

Mizu: …It’s cold.

Reader: Nice cup of tea.

Mizu: It’s horrible.

Reader: Cup of tea.

Mizu: I’m not even sure it is tea.

Reader: Cup.

Reader: You need to react when people cry.

Mizu: I did, I rolled my eyes.

Reader: Gotta love knitting needles, I can make a scarf, I can make a hat, I can stab someones eyes out, I can make mittens.

Akemi: What was that middle part?

Reader: I can make a hat?

Mizu: How much sleep did you get?

Reader: Eight.

Mizu: Hours?

Reader: Minutes. God! Taigen, would you shut the fuck up?

Taigen*Fixing his hair*: What the fuck? I didn’t even say anything!

Taigen: how come you’ve been abnormally nice to me lately?

Reader what do you mean?

Taigen: you just seem nicer than usual

Mizu: They can punch you in the face if you want.

Fowler: I could kill you if I wanted.

Reader: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You aren't special.

Akemi: Did you really have to stab him?

Reader: You weren't there, you didn't hear what he said to me.

Akemi: And what did he say?

Reader: "What are you gonna do? Stab me?"

Mizu, nodding: That's fair.

Akemi: NO!

Reader: *Screams*

Taigen: *Screams louder to establish dominance*

Ringo: Should we do something?

Mizu: No, I want to see who wins.

Ringo:Let's speak about our talents.

Ringo:...I'll start, I like to cook.

Akemi: I'm good at languages.

Reader: I'm good instruments.

Mizu: I'm good at killing people.

Reader: *Does something stupid*

Mizu: What an absolute fucking idiot.

Mizu: I can't believe I would die for them.

[ranposgirlboss]

rubs my hands all maniacally😍

a little birdie told me that your requests are open!

i was thinking abt the bsd boys reacting to a s/o that eats the weirdest food combinations LMAO

i eat cheese puffs and hot sauce aND WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I ATE APPLES WITH KETCHUP BAHAH

anyways that’s all 🙏

BAJUAHJSGVHSABJGASHJBSAGHVSBJGASBHJ BRO IF U LIKE THAT EAT APPLES AND SOYSAUCE ITS SO BANGER!!! THE SWEET AND SALTY SAVOURY FEEL >>>> also popcorn and ketchup is so real

ALSO PROPS TO MY BESTIE FOR HELPING ME WITH SOME OF THESE IDEAS!! (mainly poes) THANK HER IN YOUR HEARTS BC SHE DOESNT HAVE AN ACC ON HERE!!!

i HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING THESE OMG

chara list: tecchou, jouno, ranpo, poe and dazai,

GENRE: FLUFF >:))

i made them all little skrunklies in this >:))

-------------------------

TECCHOU

-IM SORRY IF I SPELLED THAT HORRIBLY WRONG I ALWAYS CALL HIM KATCHOW (-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩___-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩)

-omg yall would be married instantly

-he has the papers signed

-FINALLY SOMEONE WHO WILL TRY SOME OF HIS COMBINATIONS!!!

-feels so understood

-if you ask him to try ur combos, HE WILL ALWAYS ACCEPT. A FELLOW WEIRD FOOD LOVER IN ARMS IS IN NEED OF HIS ASSISTANCE, AND HE CANNOT REFUSE.

-WOULD TAKE YOU OUT ON DATES AND GET EXTREMELY CONCERNED LOOKS FROM WAITERS.

-has had to protect you from jounos plots of world domination against weird food lovers and plots to murder you

-yall have a list of ur favorite food.

-so sexy

JOUNO

-(he looks so cute as a skrunkle anyways)

-haha

-run.

-dont even try to sneak it with him. he may be blind, but his other senses are at their prime and HE IS READY TO THROW HANDS

-"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, ONE TECCHOU WAS HARD ENOUGH I DONT NEED TWO GOD DAMN."

-might actually throw hands with you, like HELL JUST SMACK THE FOOD OUT OF YOUR HAND AND BE LIKE "n o ."

-so silly in theory but when he actually does slap it away it makes you want to beat him up so bad

-YOURE ASS BEST BE GLAD HE LOVES YOU OR HE WOULDVE TRIED TO KILL YOU AT LEAST 5 TIMES

-ugh i love the sassy skrunkle (ignore the fact he can kill you instantly)

RANPO

-WITH HIM, it all depends.

-it depends on how it tastes.

-because if it tastes actually good, HE WILL BE SO HAPPY

-"i knew you had good taste Y/N (人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+"

-if it tastes bad to him tho...

-HE WOULD BE SO BETRAYED

-would look like you just insulted his entire bloodline real

-"Y/N, how DARE YOU MAKE ME, THE GREATEST DETECTIVE, TRY THIS."

-it would take a long amount of sorries and sweets to get him to forgive you.

POE

-ok ok so listen

-would probably see you eating the weird ass shit, blink a few times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating, then go back to reading

-if you asked him to try it, he would be like "oh sorry i just ate a 5 course meal Y/N" (he's a terrible liar)

-but with him, you could probably convince him to try it 😈

-theres a very high chance he hates it, i know we don't know what their eating habits are like, but poe gives off picky vibes...

-would probably be like "w-wow Y/N thats uhm...that's really good for you Y/N................"

-would never try it again </3

DAZAI

-NGL HE WOULD HAVE WEIRD TASTE BUDS TOO

-I MEAN BRO LITERALLY ATE DOG FOOD AS IF IT WAS A CASUAL TUESDAY

-i feel like he would at least try them, and if he didn't like them, he would CHUCK THOSE BITCHES

-more as a joke then an actual insult, UNLIKE SOMEONE (jouno)

-swears hell pay for them after (he never does)

-one day you threaten to throw him across the room like your damn food he keeps throwing

-he threw extra food that day

-would beg convince you to try dog treats (fun author fact: i used to eat dog food when i was a kid. it sucked ass but i was hungry)

-YALL WOULD DO THOSE CHALLENGES WHERE YOU PUT RANDOM FOOD IN A BLENDER AND SEE HOW IT WOULD TEST.

-honestly just another way to bond with you

----------------------------------------

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THANKS FOR READING THIS SILLY THING I WROTE AND THANKS FOR REQUESTING ♡(ӦｖӦ｡). I ALWAYS CAN ACCEPT MORE REQS!!!! TYSM!!!!

i forgot to add tags the first TIME I POSTED BAHAJVGBHASGVGASUHJASVGHJABSJ

[wixenburr]

Batfam quotes taken from the group chat starboard

Tim, to Damian: I'm not going to talk twink logistics with you.

Tim: my social anxiety has me by the throat, like 24/7 Dick: Make out with it.

Tim: I'd kill a person before i drank hot water Jason: I'd kill a person.

Duke: I'm alright with being forgotten Actually

Dick, post-hallucinations: DREAM JASON IS A CHICKEN NUGGET

Dick: Thank you^^, it's because I'm insane—

Steph: First I get attacked by a butterfly in my dream and now this

Dick, post-killing joker: And plenty of gore and horror just for you!! <3 <3 Jason: :o JUST FOR ME?!

Bruce: How am i already an absentee father

Dick: spanish immersion until my cousin went back to his house and then it was english all the way down Tim: bisexual moment

Alfred: you know you have real kids when they ignore you :)

Steph: Atlantic Pacific Etc Sea Ocean Uhh

Dick: Ive never seen pineapple on a pizza, if i did id just be sad spongebob lost his home

(Bruce, having a breakdown) Tim, muffled: oh my god, i just ate that whole burger

Tim: Im sorry i slept

Cass: as an aroace pacifist fmk is a nightmare scenerio Jason: i may be asexual but i am sure as hell not a pacifist it's kill kill kill for me baby

Dick: No, Tim was gonna start killing people, there's a difference

Dick: wait no the flaky skin is on my face not my ass-

Alfred: what in the british archaelogist is happening here

Babs: I'm sorry i committed an actual war crime but its for y'alls own good

Damian: I don't need comfort, i need a knife

Bruce: I'm a firm believer in whore rights okay?

Steph: hELP- Duke: I'm eating spaghett Steph: what a simple life

Damian: Oh hi Batcow, finally someone interesting to talk to

Tim: I don't have depression, a therapist hasn't diagnosed me

anyone@Dick: noooo aha dont die sparkle butt

Damian: ive been god before

Bruce: i leave for two minutes and come back to octobussy

Tim: i am also killable if that makes you feel any better???

Babs: I support you with my eyes closed.

Dick: Instead im watching children with hot glue guns Damian: Like, in battle??? Dick: LIKE IN ARTS AND CRAFT

Steph: if i get a head injury i could probably read portuguese

Steph: love how we went in different directions Jason: The only directions: murder or pranks

Duke: I can't count that high so i'm-- i'm not gonna read that

Dick: punches him straight in the eye then immediately goes in for the kiss Tim: We call that the "Sock-n-Smooch"

Bruce: worm food can be eggs. scrambled ones. Damian: i dont lay eggs Bruce: chickens do?? Damian: oh. We have chickens!!!!

Tim: we have three hands for a reason

Damian: reEEEEeeeEEEEEEEEE Tim: Baby dinosaur be like Damian: I WILL BE A DINOSAUR BUT I WONT BE A B A B Y

Tim: shut up shut up shut up no you dont your bald + your mother is american

Jason: see, strangling people DOES bring miracles!

Tim: what in the minecraft commands are you trying to do here

Bonus:

Harley: mE AND MY CHECKERBOARD BOOBIES

Wally: Nightwing has two hands and a staff

[strawbs-screaming]

☆ WVBA At A Party ☆

So uhh tw for alcohol mention,emetophobia other than that its ok

Glass Joe

- doing his best not to get thrown into a dance circle

- anxious as fuck

- piston hondo (drunk as shit) keep trying to explain star wars lore to him

- hes just nodding and pretending to understand, he cant because hes speaking in japanese

- had some drinks & passed out because he doesnt take alcohol well

- woke up on the roof because some drunk bastard decided to put him onto there, theres now a investigation about trying to find who put Joe on the roof

- will hold your drink for you

- keeps getting dragged into doing dumb shit by aran ryan

Von Kaiser

- buzzed, looks like hes on the verge of death

- at the karaoke bar, killing it, yess grandpa slayyyy one foot in the grave one foot in the rave

- keeps chugging like hell, look at him go

- teaching some random people how to do traditional german dances

- randomly starts sobbing

- bear hugger has to stop him from chugging another bottle of whiskey

Disco Kid

- thrown into the dance circle, killing it

- spamming everyones phones with really positive texts

- "YUO AR TAKENTED SNF CAN DK SNYTHING YKU PUT YOU4 NINF UBTO" (You are really talented and can do anything you put your mind into)

-"thank you : )"

- "YOU SRE LIVEF ANR 4SKEBT2D,,,,ÖOCE YOURDRKF" (You are loved, love yourself)

- wasted

- giving out free hugs

- had a really good dance off with aran ryan

- fell down a flight of stairs and got up like it was nothing

- dancing the pain away

Piston Hondo

- avoiding the dance circle like its a death sentence

- explaining the star wars lore to glass joe in japanese

- will hate himself in the morning

- speaking really broken japanglish with bear hugger

- keeps lifting up von kaiser & running away as he holds him

- partying hard

- randomly starts speaking about stuff, you could be talking about how you ran over a man and his son just yesterday and he'll be like "Do you like sailor moon"

- tried to eat a glass of water, sad because he got stopped

- randomly got stuck in a british accent

King Hippo

- passed out on the floor

- someone help him please

- people keep trying to use him as a trampoline

- randomly gets up and starts to talk about sea slugs

- he just leaves after that,he is done

Great Tiger

- only sober person here

- has to stop piston hondo from explaining the star wars lore to random people

- making sure everyone is hydrated

- victim of disco kids positive texts

- gathers drunk passed out people and puts them somewhere safe so nobody gets hurt

- oh my god he is on the verge of tears from all this stress he needs help

- ended up sobbing into disco kids arms after it all got too stressful

- he could really use a break

- will hold your drink,may switch it out with water if he decides youve had enough for tonight

Don Flamenco

- too distracted too go to the dance circle

- keeps singing & referencing dumb stuff while anyone talks to him, he just has 0 thoughts right now

- "i feel like im never gonna amount to anything in my life, it just feels like im destined to end up dying alone-"

- "FIESTA SALSA QUİNCEAÑERA-"

- "why do i even bother"

- drinking cocktails like someones gonna take it away from him if he doesnt inhale it within 10 seconds

- keeps trying to call carmen

- stumbling like hell

- someone needs to tape his mouth shut

- asking the dumbest shit ever to carmen as he texts her

- "would you still love me if i was a muppet,,"

- "would you still be able to control yourself or would you need to be used like a actual muppet??"

- "i dont knwo im durnk"

Bear Hugger

- will not go into the dance circle, ever

- singing sea shanties & suddenly has the personality of a ye olden sailor

- someone convinced him to wax his legs

- confused as shit when he wakes up in the morning

- listening to hondo infodump about sailor moon, intrigued

- will laugh at anything, laughed at Macho mans left eyebrow for a solid 40 minutes

- passed out for a hour after that

- brought a random frog from the nearest pond & named it Buddy, buddy was never seen again after someone threw him out of a window

- ate candle wax, he just did, he somehow stomached it

- sober yet wasted, tapdancing on that line between mentally not present & aware

Aran Ryan

- drunk but has a camera, recording whatever happens

- "guys... this little pocket sized eejit is stuck on the roof... what the fuck.. get him off of there"

- will do anything you dare him to do, got dared to throw someones TV out of the window, the rest is history

- eated a bees

- chased piston hondo with a chair, you havent known true fear until a irishman with a camera & chair is chasing you while yelling like a psychopath while youre talking about star wars lore

- called glass joe "Glasses Jonathan"

- mourned the loss of buddy with bear hugger

- on his hater routine, texting back discos positive messages with mean messages

Soda Popinski

- sober, enjoying the show

- in the dance circle, busting it down

- dehydrated because theres no soda :(

- trying to convince aran ryan to eat a pair of headphones

- gives out water to anyone who appears drunk & asks for a drink telling them its "strong stuff" Just to see them smile & hydrate themselves

- enjoying the karaoke

- also mourning the loss of buddy, thought he was really cool

Bald Bull

- scared of the dance circle

- drunk but his social anxiety is still acting up

- mom i threw up pose when he zones out & stares into the void

- standing in the corner or clinging onto don flamenco because he cant manage crowds well

- getting second hand embarrasment from don flamencos singing

- people keep using the top of his head as a mirror

- clinging onto the nearest extroverts he knows well

- "what if everyone thinks i look like a complete idiot standing in the corner"

- Just really anxious & stressed, he doesnt manage social events well

- needs some silence

Super Macho Man

- thinks hes a good dancer, looks like hes having a stroke, dancing is not for him, especially drunk dancing

- people keep calling him grandpa

- sobbing over any minor event that effects him even slightly negatively

- sobbed over the loss of buddy

- crying over everything

- sobbing on the bathroom floor because he threw up so hard he felt like his soul left him

- hes literally just crying

- tried to do karaoke through his tears, couldnt sing the tears away

Mr Sandman

- pushed into the dance circle, accidentally made a conga line, who knew a conga line full of drunk men could be so fun?

- watching aran ryan eat weird shit & cheering him on because he thinks its funny

- bald bull tried to make a "man me a sand" joke to him, ended up looking like he was having a seizure

- "Mr sandman.. Sand.. The man?.. Sand man.. Uhhh, man him a sand-"

- "bull please lay down"

- enjoying bear huggers sea shanties

- trying to get glass joe off the roof

- fell asleep using a freezer as a pillow

Extra

- narcis showed up to tell everyone that theyre losers & left

- doc louis left early with mac as soon as the alcohol drinking started

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #13

Leviathan: Secondhand embarrassment is pure agony and I wish a lot of comedy didn’t rely on it

I cannot deal with it, I have to literally leave the room

Solomon: It’s a sign of being extremely empathetic

Leviathan: Thanks! I hate it. How do I uninstall?

•

Solomon:

Depression tips

• kill the gods and eat their flesh to rise above human chemicals into horrifying immortality

Raphael: We need to talk

•

Simeon: Still don’t really understand how some people have trouble just being nice

Mephistopheles: Oh my gosh you’re such a nice person. Hey everybody come look at how much of a good person this is.

Simeon: I literally cannot comprehend how you got offended by this but thanks for proving my point anyway

•

Belphegor: When I get comfortable with people I start using them as pillows and foot rests

Beelzebub: When I get used as a pillow or foot rest I feel loved

Simeon: I am both of these people

•

Satan:

You know how there’s a theory that no two people see color the same way.

Does that mean color is like

A pigment of your imagination

Mephistopheles: YOU FUCKING DIDNT

Simeon: Huehuehue

Leviathan: #even that fucking laugh is a pun #i hate you all

•

Asmodeus: I’M HOME ALONE AND MY FAMILY FORGOT TO TELL ME THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE PAINTING OUR HOUSE SO I’VE BEEN REENACTING LES MIS AND I JUST VIOLENTLY THREW OPEN THE WINDOW TO YELL ‘CANNONS’ AND THE POOR GUY NEARLY FELL OFF HIS STEPLADDER

Asmodeus: DONT YOU DARE REBLOG THIS I MIGHT GET SUED

•

Leviathan: Sometimes I wake up with a very urgent thought on my mind and it’s usually pretty dumb like ‘je suis un pomme’ or ‘root beer fairytales’ but this morning I woke up and sat there for a second and all I could think was

Tis I,

The frenchiest fry

•

Belphegor: I am decayed. My lungs are full of thorns and mildew, my bones are held together by vines. I am fragile, be gentle with my corpse.

Lucifer: Get out of bed you’re going to school whether you like it our not.

Belphegor: I refuse.

•

Mammon: OMG so I just figured out the word “hurt” is past, present, and future. You will be hurt. You are hurt. You were hurt.

BECAUSE IF SOMETHING TRULY HURT, IT NEVER REALLY STOPS

Belphegor: you poetic little shit

Satan: It’s because…. It’s an adjective….

Lucifer: You will be stupid.

You are stupid.

You were stupid.

•

Mammon: Therapy got a drive-thru or summ?

MC: Welcome to shrink in a box can I take your disorder?

•

Leviathan: Why the fuck does English have a word for the act of throwing someone out a window, defenestration, but not for the day after tomorrow

Satan: Because you’re not looking hard enough

Overmorrow = the day after tomorrow

Ereyesterday = the day before yesterday

Example: I defenestrated my younger brother yesterday. I shall defenestrate my older brother overmorrow! Because I hate my family and also windows!

•

Satan: Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest that just sounds nice and cozy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods you’re going to die.

Asmodeus: My favorite explaining the difference between a butt dial and a booty call

Lucifer: It’s called connotations

Asmodeus: Try this one on for size:

“Forgive me, father, for I have sinned.”

“Sorry, daddy, I’ve been naughty.”

Raphael: Great news! Language is now banned

•

Leviathan: Helpful grammar tip! Farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance!

Simeon: Who hurt you?

Leviathan: My father did you not read the post

•

Beelzebub: Isn’t it weird how you can actually feel pain in your chest and stomach when something really hurts your feelings

Solomon: This is actually because it activates your vagus nerve! Basically your body goes “we are so upset! We must be injured! Where???? On the inside guts! Those are confusing and hard to differentiate!!! Confusing guts are hurt!”

Leviathan: Great! How do I uninstall it?

•

Satan: Part of new internet grammar. Using question marks not to denote questions but upturns in voice, so that a tentative statement gets a question mark but a flatly delivered question doesn’t.

Mammon: Why would you do this

Leviathan: It just seems right?

•

Mammon: In a constant state of ‘how dare you assume I know what I’m doing’ but also ‘don’t you dare question me or what I’m doing’

Leviathan: “I have no idea what I’m doing and you can’t stop me.”

Simeon: Artists and writers have a lot to say about this post

•

Mammon: Why my hand shaky?

Barbatos: Your Skelton is ready to hatch

Mammon: This is so fucking ominous thank you

•

Asmodeus: Life is a highway

Asmodeus: Explain

Asmodeus: Wanna ride it all night long

Lucifer: Why did you reply to yourself?

Asmodeus: I refuse to share the spotlight but I like the meme format

•

Beelzebub: I haven’t ate anything since 11 bruh I’m starving

Thirteen: Damn an u how old now?

[ughgoaway]

Oh yeah for sure his neck/ clavicle area is one of his best features. When he screams into the mic and you can see the muscles🥵 And when he takes a drag of his cigarette or takes a deep breath in and the space between his collarbones dips in (I guess it’s called the Suprasternal notch lol thanks google) it literally makes me insane. This is oddly specific but I feel like you’d get it :’) oh and when he throws his head back and his adams apple shows more

He just makes me so ajskdhksbd I need him bad

I really need him to shave and buy more hair gel, something about the slicked back hair and slightly oversized suit is so sleazy and slutty but I LOVE IT

-🌻

when he's slightly sweaty and his collarbones and neck are just glowing... I need to lick him. I'm so sorry. shiny collarbone was inspired by him after coming off stage, actually.

OHMYGOD YES WHEN HE DOES THE EXTENDED "COOL" IN ROBBERS AND HIS VEINS COME OUT AHRHHRHSHWHW

omg, who knew that tumblr could be so educational??? I LOVE his suprasternal notch lmao, its something so small, but so good. god, I want to mark him up so badly.

NO, THE ODDLY SPECIFIC STUFF IS MY FAVVVVVV. I SO GET IT. i love it when he has a cig in his mouth and puffs the smoke out with it still between his lips, and I love it when he holds the cig between his teeth.

Adams apples remain incredibly hot to me omgggggg. LIKE WHEN HE THROWS HIS HEAD BACK AND BREATHES HEAVY, AND YOU CAN SEE IT??? KILL. ME. NOW.

imagining his adams apple bobbing as he gulps nervously if you're dominating him... the red flush creeping up his neck as you edge him again and again. it spreads to his chest and cheeks, a pink glow covering his whole body as you bring him to the brink over and over but you dont let him cum...

*gasp* not the shaving mention... I can feel @think0fmehigh dying rn at the suggestion. every time someone brings up matty shaving, she loses part of her soul

I personally LOVE the stache but I do go through phases of missing the clean shaven look. maybe it's my love for more effeminate men coming out lmao!! like I saw some roxy videos today and FUCK. he looked immaculate that night.

no bc the slicked back hair and the oversized suits is giving laid back son of a mobster who would kill for his gf or just kill in general... very wattpad fic of him, and I eat it up every time.

sleazy and sexy just IS matty healy. Those are the two most perfect words to describe him.

[thegongoozlerreacts]

Dead Plate (Part 2)

OK so its been a month since the last time ive played Dead Plate and uhh oops!! my bad !!

in my defense life has gotten very busy for me especially since its the holidays but now i finally have the time to finish this game and get at least one ending!! (hopefully)

spoilers under the cut

back to day 5 where i struggled so incredibly hard

the amount of times ive played through day 4's nightmare sequence is killing me

bro. how do i pass this level without losing a customer

NOOO I WAS SO CLOSE WHYYY. PLEASE. literally i was doing so well but i took too long for the 4 table orders ugh <//3

i wish you could see like, a patience meter for the customers or something

maybe i should try using the item that slows down how impatient they get

YESSS FINALLY!!! I DID IT I FINALLY DID IT!!

what is that weird squelching sound.

still here even though the shift is over and the sounds i am hearing are concerning to say the least

what if... i just leave ok i cant leave

boss's office? also i just noticed the timer ticking down uhh

can i just leave please why is the timer ticking down wtf do i do???

also lots of interesting things in that office

was the review on the waiter about Rody? if so ouch man thats harsh

NOOOOO OH MY GOD...... I ACCIDENTALLY QUIT I HAVE TO DO DAY 5 ALL OVER AGAIN ARE YOU KIDDING ME

ok well. at least now i know my key to success is the cologne

ok so Rody had an interesting reaction to the crumpled up picture of Vince and a woman so maybe he knows who she is? is this the 'her' that you can sorta not really call on the telephone??? or is he just surprised to find love letters in the trash

anyways its telling me the sounds are coming from the freezer but idk where to go from here

LMAO the sound signalling the end of the day jumpscared me askhjdakj

at least the food looks tasty

what was that whole thing about tho? what was going on in the freezer??

back home, looked out the window and i noticed you can see someone's silhouette in the background windows

i dont know if that was always there and i just missed it but very interesting

FINALLY a new nightmare

bro he was in an oven?? why ?? damn Rody's nightmares are like really creepy akladjalks

another day another dollar

damn. im gonna struggle once again because there is a LOT of customers and like i am just sooo. ksfdjslkdj whatevr kakayanin !! lets go guys

my hands are so sweaty akladh

another successful day and another tasty dish ....my fingers hurt LMAO

looked out the window and yep alright the person's silhouette isnt always there

huh. interesting nightmare it was Vince eating him and like damn that actually scared me lskjd

shorter than previous nightmares

well onto day 7 another day another dollar

lets go!! i am winning!!! only had to retry once this day!!

BROSKI JUST QUIT?!?!?

ohhh so the woman is named Manon

aww i feel so bad for this guy :(( the girl isnt picking up i wonder why tho? like does she just not like him anymore and he just needs to give up on her or is it cuz of smth w Vince (shes probably the girl from the crumpled photo in the trash right?)

damn the phone just ringing while the credits are playing

ouch :((

alright then time to get the other endings!! to do this i will be following the ending guide bc my brain is not big enough to figure it out by myself lmao

ive opened up the official ending guide and oho? you can actually get a phone call from Manon? cool i will try that out first

restarting all the way to day 1 bc i miss how easy it was

yk an interesting thing that was introduced in the tutorial that i havent experienced yet is the customers asking questions

oh hey!! i kept the stuff that i purchased in my previous run?? really?? awesomeee

ooh hey!! i kept the dishes from previous runs too!! cool

ok its day 3 now and i have to take out the trash to activate the cutscene

ok went through that whole baffling ordeal of getting slapped

also!! i chatted with Vince on day 3 and like. idk their chats are just funny to me

also like there might be something wrong with me but i am lowkey shipping Rody and Vincent together kadjlksd this is something that happened in Elevator Hitch where i started lowkey shipping the two main characters oopsies

anyways!! moving swiftly onwards!!

um. my guy disappeared after i checked the fridge

oh shit new cutscene

BRO ??? UM ????? well that was scary uhh. damn

oh the boss isnt in the kitchen anymore wait i didnt get to do all the dialogue options that are needed!! no!! does this mean i need to redo this whole day in order to get the phone call event???

better safe than sorry i guess

ok so interestingly when Rody asked Vince if he liked his job, he didnt answer the question he just changed the subject and made fun of Rody LOL

the 'can you give me a raise' question gives some more details on Manon and what Rody thinks of her (he is a grade A simp bro)

the 'are you single' question is interesting to me just bc Rody the simp has issues w Vince being like 'meh' on romance and tbh im with Vince on romance not being the end-all-be-all

THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT A STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE

IS IT CUZ I FED THE RAT CHEESE INSTEAD OF SCARING IT AWAY OR SMTH???

EW ITS IN THE FRIDGE AND THE REAL ONE I HAD BEFORE IS GONE NOOOOOOO

Vince: I haven't got any sense of taste. Rody: Yeah I could see the decorations out there-

LMFAOOO RODYYY

bro now i am sad that i missed out on these gold interactions between them on my first run this is so funny

also they both didnt really have any proper answers for what their favorite food is Vince was like 'eh i dont have any since i cant taste stuff idk lemons or smth' while Rody was like 'i just like whatever my girlfriend likes'

very interesting how Rody is like obsessed(?) with Manon

then when asking Vince what he's reading, he just straight-up lies about what the reviews are saying about Rody lmfaoooo

anyways now for the creepy night restaurant segment and going back in Vince's office to check out the possible Manon love letters in the trash

i just realized the croque madames are like. rotten cuz they have flies flying around it which ew! yuck! why is it like that

well. nothing i can do about it so next day i guess!! oh hey wait i can now afford the matches which i will be needing for ending 3! nice

OK NOW I HAVE REACHED THE PHONE CALL

damn ok so its not Manon but its Vince inviting Rody to a dinner party!! nice !!

LMFAOOOO HE INVITED RODY TO MAKE HIM WORK VINCE I CANT BELIEVE YOU!!

Rody you are so embarrassing but its ok bc ur really funny anyways!! getting interesting lore on Vince and Rody!!

one of Rody's old classmates was there, and then another guest said that either Vince must really like Rody to have him there at the party or is incredibly desperate akldskl (since she said that Rody's outfit sucks LOL)

ooh ok so. Rody is desperate and a bit delusional my bro u gotta let go of that girl bc apparently she dumped you already so like. stop bro

dkjhskas nooo ive served all the guests and theres nothing left to do except snoop around in Vincent's bedroom agh!! agh!!!!!

bro when i go in the room the music just disappears wtf

UM? HELLO??? BRO THAT SCARED ME DSKJKSDJ

i knew this was going to happenn aughjahkj

BRO THE MUSIC IS JUST GONE AJKSDFK not Rody asking what happened like he didnt just steal smth from Vince and pretty much get caught in the act 😭😭😭

well ok then so that happened

actually you know, now that im thinking about it, its kinda weird that Vince threw Manon's letters in the trash does that mean she is pursuing him romantically but he like just doesnt care or what??

i am inside and i am afraid cuz the game asked 'are you sure?' when i clicked 'go inside' broooo

oh hey its Manon and Rody WAIT WHY IS THIS LOCKET IN HERE ?? DID VINCE KILL HER ??

ASKHDKAS OH FUCKK OH NO

bro thats so like. sadistic leaving him tied up and telling him he can live if he runs away but like he can only crawl across the floor

i see why the matches are needed for this part

gee wow thanks game

ok now this time im bringing the matches with me

ok so ive burned away the ropes but im still trapped inside cuz he locked the freezer aghhh

what the heck do i do?? oh nvm i found bags of flour, i can use these to reach the cooler

so i have to stop the fans of the cooler, probably by putting something in it

can i take the saw out?? oh wait theres a switch LOL

ok so ive use the saw to cut the meat off and now ive got animal bones

ive jammed the bones in the fans and now i can break open the window wow

SHIT GOT CAUGHT BY VINCE

DID HE JUST BITE A PIECE OF MY FLESH?!??!

oh my god. he killed and cooked her to feed to Rody i. wHY???

oh so he ate Rody's ear i am shook wtf

bro Rody just severely pissed this guy off by telling him he never ate his food i feel it in my bones also makes sense why its just sitting in his fridge

Rody really hitting this guy where it hurts damn i mean its deserved cuz of like the whole thing

i accidentally got ending 4 since i messed up a QTE but damn. damn that was wild and also this is gross

something i didnt mention earlier but i noticed that there was a grilled hanger steak on the table, which is the dish when you get ending 1 would the other dishes i got in past endings show up when i got them? but i got ending 2 and the dish from that didnt show up so maybe its just a little detail for ending 1 wait was the steak made out of Manon. oh boy that makes that ending a lil more fucked up

ok going back to the chase sequence

BRO RODY JUST KILLED HIM

so i went into Vince's office, surprisingly did not get chased inside and then i picked up the broken bottle and now Rody's just killed the guy

got the restaurant key

bestie like. theyre gonna arrest u if u just leave and never say anything please explain the situation to the police or smth

why is the game not letting me leave. what do you mean revenge is best served cold. does the game want me to put Vince in the freezer!??!?!

yep the steak is def Manon

why r u not letting me leave wtf do i do

trying to read the comments on the game's page on itch.io and the amount of people going 'when will they kiss' 'kiss ending when' im laughing

like even tho all this horrible shit just happened i still lowkey ship Vince and Rody oopsies. toxic yaoi LOLOLOL

i have no idea what to do now so i am just gonna look up a guide rq

ok i need to get the cooking oil

he's burning this place to the ground

wait was Vince still alive after getting stabbed repeatedly???? his eye moved when Rody was pouring oil on him and i mean the game did say that his eyes are still following you

oh bro after-credits cutscene with Manon???

aww ok my opinion of Manon has greatly improved cuz she broke up w Rody cuz he was destroying himself for her she realized that she wasnt good for him and like, for the greater good of his mental health they cant be together

its burnt and also its lemon, which is what Vince said was his favorite food

OH HEY IT CHANGED

actually i did notice that after ending 3 it was snowy

damn

well, thats the end of my playthrough on Dead Plate

honestly, it was a very fun and enjoyable game! i liked the serving aspect even tho i kinda sucked at it and like i also really liked Rody and Vince despite all that just happened those two are seriously fucked up and i love them LOLOL

the music was really good and made up for having to redo day 5 over and over again alskdjh i was jamming most of the time to the music the art was also really good! i liked how cute the pixel sprites were, and then like the art for the portraits and CGs and everything was also really good! i really enjoyed the art style and music

the story was interesting, and i liked it too the twist was wild and blew my mind but i am still a massive fan of Vincent x Rody JKDAHSDKJ

i like how there was a cannibalism twist but Vincent wasnt actually like, an actual cannibal he was just insane and planning on making Rody an unknowing cannibal

i know he ate Rody's ear but like. he said that he doesnt eat people on the regular so yk he's just fucked up

also its really funny reading all the comments and seeing a lot of Vincent x Rody stuff LMFAOOO so true of everybody honestly

HELP I FOUND A COMMENT THAT SAID THEY NOTICED EVERY PIC WITH VINCE IN IT (on the store page) HAS HIM LOOKING AT RODY LDSJHSFLSDKN THE SHIP IS SO REAL!!!

ok sorry enough of that

overall, 10/10 would play again solely for the server gameplay (would be cool to have a kind of endless mode where you just serve customers until one leaves or something) and also because i love these characters

thats all for today and probably for this month LOL byebye!!

[walnutcookie]

i need to talk about almond again

clearly the people who draw him as a tall muscular wrinkleless perfect handsome faced buff hot guy know jack shit about almond cookie cause that is NOT him . hes a weirdo hes a loser hes fucking pathetic hes not even a good guy hes a cop and hes literally canonically arrested children And also tried to arrest a whole fucking dragon this guy is so sick in the head he looks like a poor little cat whos been stuck in the rain but if you brushed its fur back and now it looks even weirder. he canonically tried to buy butter pretzels painting with coffee cups and i tjink thats so fucking funny

look at this . Fuckinf thang okay hold on im gonna get a little sidetracked here but this pisses me off sooo bad

they changed his line because it was too sad or some shit but ONLY IN THE ENGLISH DUB . this line is canon TO ME and nobody can tell me otherwise Fuck you he hates his job so much he started it when he was in his 20s because he was following in his moms footsteps and then she died from a fleeing wizard soon after he started his job and he was left without guidance to his job or life in general because she was his only local family and he hates his dad so hes completely alone and scared and eventually he does get used to things but he no longer uses magic and doesnt consider himself a wizard and he trusts them considerably less

and then things get better and he feels like hes stable enough to have a kid maybe ! so all by himself he bakes walnut and hes doing a little dancey dance around the kitchen as she cooks hes so excited to have a lil daughter and when the magic settles in and shes alive and in his arms he Absolutely melts . she is sooo tiny and delicate and tinspney he is just like Oh my fuckign god i will kill for this thang .he watches her grow up and raises her all by himself (well he gets babysitters since he cant always watch her as a single dad, usually latte) and hes soo proud of her and shes just so smart and cute and also is scarily similar to his mom . he'll never admit it out loud but hes scared of how ambitious and brave walnut is. shes awfully persistent on her dream to grow up to be a detective like her dad and it scares him how smart she is but also hes sooo proud of her shes AMAZING and solves every case shes ever gotten . but he always makes sure to protect her however he can, he controls all the cases she handles and stays very involved to make sure things dont go wrong. rogueforts antics are usually the least dangerous so hes fine with her taking on their antics ,, and despite him swearing to never use magic again when walnut came out as trans to him he did a little spell to help get rid of some of her dysphoria like his mom did for him :] (and then proceeded to pass out becausr he hasnt done a spell in 20 years and magic is incredibly draining)

hes so so scared that shes going to meet the same fate as his mom and he'll be alone again . granted he has close friends to support him this time but it hurt so bad when he lost his mom hes horrified to have it happen again. and after walnut gets cursed and he almost loses her he snaps. suddenly hes obsessed with his job. he has lost ALL TRUST in wizards (other than latte and bus other really close friends) where before he was a lot more laid back, had a dad bod, was much more cheery and took care of himself, now hes starting to neglect himself in favor of his job. just like his lines in crk, he skips his lunches so he can take on more calls. now he feels obligated to do it, to protect the streets of parfaedia so he doesnt lose someone again. mans ages 30 years in a few months because he refuses to sleep and eat and relax. mans is stressed as fuck holy shit he needs a vacation hes geeting sooo many gray hairs. his detective work has started to interfere with his teaching job too, and his classes are getting cut short. his entire life is crumbling apart because hes so desperate to make sure walnut is safe and eventually it probably gets to the point where hes convinced himself that this is what his job is all about and he forgets the reason WHY hes working so hard (to keep walnut safe) he ends up just believing that hes always needed to do this and hes not overworking himself and he needs to try harder and it isnt bad for him . he only takes breaks so he can spend time with his daughter and go to amusement parks nd stuff with her . he has a hard time staying awake but he'll fight the drowsiness to make her happy

hes grumpy as shit man before he was pretty chill and outgoing but now hes just a big old grump . partially because hes sleep deprived but mostly because he hates his job soo much. he hates it he hatee his job sooo much but girl hes convinced he has a responsibility to protect the city and if he leaves it alone for 2 minutes itll burst into flames and also the fact that walnut would be SHATTERED if she found out he quit because her dream job was too hard . so he pushes through

hes soo clumsy he'll trip on THE AIR and fall and scrape his chin and break his arm and then he'll get up and run right smack into a pole . the reason i draw his nose bandaged is because he breaks it like every three weeks hes the bisexual man whos wiping his bloody nose seductively but its not seductive its because he just ran into a wall all of his senses are fucked up btw. his sight and hearing isnt so good because of old age (hes like 40 btw and he has glasss but refuses to wear them) and hes burnt the nerves on his tongue and fingers with coffee he cant feel or taste for shit and his hands feel like sandpaper and hes broken his nose somany times that his breathing is shallow and raspy God damn this guy is pathetic. miserable little wet cat of a man. he has so many scars and they arent impressive at all tjhey all come from tje stupidest things ever and he has the WORST FUCKING LUCK TOO he'll be walking under a line of trees and get hit by a falling acorn TWICE.

anyone who draws him muscular is WRONg SO VERY WRONG hes built like a twig hes weak as shit and can barely lift a rock he cant pick up walnut anymore the only tjings hes good at are running and throwing handcuffs. also he does NOT have a smooth and clear handsome face he looks incredibly tired (he is) he has eyebags and wrinkles and his nose is broken and his face is scarred Fuck you

the only times hes not grumpy is when hes with a loved one or with a kid . hes actually pretty sarcastic and sillay around walnut and latte and eclair (and later roquefort) and he chuckles a lot but hes always very nice around kids . Aside from arresting them in all of his canon art and even the cutscenes he really only smiles around cream puff/walnut/the player (whos mesnt to be a student),,, especially with walnut he looks so happys in the canon art :] AND in the newest detective event whrre he helps the little kid GWA (ALSO IF YOU TAKE HIM BEING FRIENDLY WITH KIDS THE WRONG WAY IM MAULING YOU HES NOT A CREEP HES JUST A DAD WHO DOES DAD THINGS BITING YOU BITING YOU BITING YOUT) i think hed be the type of guy to see a student crying at their desk and pull them out of class to ask whats wrong and give them a pep talk if tjey need it ,,,

also he definitely has a sweet tooth and he denies it . he wants to keep that cold hardened detective look so he stays away from sweets but girl walnuts halloween candy isnt just disappearing out of nowhere . I was really happy actyally because the cake shop thingy confirmed my hc and HE ACTUWLLY SAYS HES NOT A SWEETS GUY AGAKWBFLDH (he doesmt show any sign of denial but shhhhh trust me he secretly looves sweets)

and tjen . His health gets soo bad one day when he gets home he actually just passes out. Not just in a "i am tired" way he literally hits the floor hard (this also happens to be on the same night he confessed to roguefort). he wakes up in the hospital and walnut is Traumatized (thats for another ramble) and now is trying to help him better health by doing things like leaving sticky notes reminding him to eat and urging him to sleep and he feels HORRIBLY GUILTY that his own 12 year old daughter has to help him with self care but hes made these horrible habits for himself that are hard to break . and he struggles a lot!!! but hes trying

then soon he starts dating roquefort (secret identity of roguefort if youre new to my blog) and with their little family of three theyre all a little better :] with the efforts of walnut and roque combined almond is back into Healthy habits . woohoo!

and then he sees the wizard that killed his mom and chases her and Fucking Dies

which like . man he spent so much time worrying about losing walnut and having to feel the pain of losing his family again that he forgot she might feel that pain if she lost him.

anyways if you read all of this i am Kissing you on the lips . keep in mind none of this is canon im just rambling about my interpretation of almond (which is the correct one /LHJ)

ASKS ARE VERY VERY WELCOME Idk if i missed anything

[rotten-vivs]

1, 3, 4, 6, 8, 9, 10, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 22, 24

choose violence ask game (life series edition)

oh my god, this is gonna be a bit long lmao, bear with me

1. the character everyone gets wrong

tango, i have rarely seen people get him just right. he's one of those characters that unfortunately gets molded into whatever the fandom needs him to be. dont blame them, i can admit i also struggled to have a good grasp of his character at first

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

i saw someone rant about how scott and cleo were just merciless bullies against pearl. which yeah, they were pretty mean to her, but the person didn't even attempt to understand scott and cleo's motivations. i know it doesn't seem much, but as someone who has a passion for that series's characters and their motivations it pissed me off that they were just ignored

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

the person from the question above lol. i rarely block accounts (unless they're bots), but the post i mentioned had very disgusting vibes

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

solidaritek shippers who talk shit about flower husbands. and the opposite too, but i've seen that one more. let jimmy be loved by two people for fuck's sake!!

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

"dogwarts were the good guys actually" NO THEY FUCKING WERENT. watch the crastle or jimmy and scott (especially those two), dogwarts tried to forcefully take over all groups at one point. im not saying they were evil, they had understandable motivations...but that doesn't make them "good". i think this opinion popularized as pushback from "desert duo are the good guys" opinion (which is also wrong lol)

9. worst part of canon

the limited life ending, im sorry. not because martyn "played dirty", if anything that made the ending way better than it would've been. but the lead up from all three final perspectives were a bit underwhelming

10. worst part of fanon

sometimes people give too much power to the watchers to the point they take away autonomy from the characters. they are WATCHERS. they watch, not play. yes they put the players in the situation, but the players themselves are the ones putting the show

13. worst blorboficiation

i dont know if worst, but lizzie. she tends to be very dumbed down and infantilized. as if she didn't kill as boogey multiple times by making people trust her. dont get me wrong, she is chronically confused, but she is not a sweet innocent angel too fragile for this world

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

i really dont know anything about hermitcraft so there might be a reason for it, but i see a lot of fics that make that server the "safe haven/place of healing in between life games". i dont really watch hc, so whenever i see it in fics and they reference stuff from that server i go ???. not complaining of course, i just try to pick up the context clues and use the general fandom knowledge i gathered through osmosis

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

y'know, i still don't know what those things that people put on pearl's head are. they look like bunny ears, or two feathers sticking out. something i also see a lot is all the winners in stained glass windows, sometimes in a "Hall of Winners". i dont know where it came from, but i eat it up every single time, i love it

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

not a fan of romantic smalletho. i tried, the idea of them is fun, but they're just besties in my brain

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

ender skizz!! his 3L red skin is so iconic. also more team best as superheroes. they called themselves the heroes of the server, dress them up as that

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

i dont see people referencing cleo's almost death by tree suffocation on the first episode of third life, even though they were so many perspectives of it. narratively, it was the first time that they saw death as a possible threat. outside of the story, it was so fucking funny. they were all chilling and suddenly, tree

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

i'll be honest, im not the biggest smut fan. i'm not against it, but i dont really get the appeal. i won't turn away an E rated fic if im interested on the concept of the overall fic, but i dont actively search them. i will say...treebark smut is always so well fucking written. the love, the devotion, the yearning, the desperation, the craving. treebark enjoyers can write a good sex scene, and you can quote me on that

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

bigb was jealous of ren and martyn in double life. he says it, out loud, multiple times. there's so many angles you can go with this and so much potential. there's the treebark angle of course, but there's also how bigb used that to avoid responsibility from having a secret soulmate behind ren's back. tbh ren and bigb's relationship overall is way too ignored for literally being the most interesting soulmate pair

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

a bit more overall mcyt than life series fandom, but any boundaries discourse, especially shipping for some reason. i have a lot of opinions, but overall i think we should stop fucking talking about "boundaries" so much. boundaries assumes a two-way interaction. and unless i am tagging the cc or putting stuff on their chats/comments or on knowingly frequented tags, what i am posting does not need their permission. does that mean "post everything, have no morals"? fuck no, but that is really the responsibility of each person. if i don't think something should be posted on the internet, i won't do it. if i see people posting that stuff, i will mute/block/report (if needed). you know what we shouldn't do? bring attention to uncomfortable shit to ccs when they are live (aiming this directly to the 2 donos in the last couple of weeks that have asked scar what his boundaries on shipping is, which he either truly doesn't understand or is purposely avoiding to reply). anyways, always causes rancid discourse and at worst full on witch hunts for shit that really doesn't matter

[loser4loserswhok1ll]

Matchup maybe possibly? 👀

I'm a 5'1" short king trans guy and I need to wear glasses but I simply Do Not out of spite. My hobbies include eating, drawing, writing, and eating some more, so I'm hefty and hairy like a bear cub. My favourite genres of music are nu metal and alt rock, and I dress like a stereotypical dad with button-ups and cargo shorts. I'm also autistic and my dream job is to be a mortician since medical science is a big special interest of mine!

I hope that's enough to go off of! Have a great day / night!!

You sound so cool tf (true asf with the short king stuff i feel you)

not gonna lie i was fighting for my life choosing this one, so i hope its not god awful

I match you with...

Stu Macher !

He'd never say it out loud, but he is fascinated by you entirely. You guys share similar music tastes, though he indulges in pop / punk rock more than alt rock. Your guys favorite shared bands are korn and slipknot, though he wishes you would indulge in weezer more (hes a loser in my heart of hearts.) He loves how you listen to such heavy music but look like Just Some Dude. Hes the adhd to your autism, good luck. Hes just as blind as you so good luck trying to read menus, both of you are hopeless and sightless. I dont know how either of you are still alive at this point. Loves to feed you also. He has a huge fixation with your mouth. Loves to watch your mouth as you talk, eat, drink, even just resting and dormant. Also hes in LOVE with how hairy you are. One of his strongest fascinations with you is how well your hair grows. Hes incapable of growing any hair basically so he likes that you contradict him. When youre drawing he'll do that annoying thing where he constantly asks stupid questions. "You drew that?" "Can you draw me?" "How'd you do that?" "Do you draw often?" so good luck drawing in peace. He'll ask often if he can dress you, choose your outfits and style you like his personal doll. He also steals your clothes. When you tell him about your dream of becoming a mortician, he kind of thinks its a joke at first. When you solidify that you are serious, he will be so supportive. Calls you smart and a genius and other nicknames in that pattern anytime you infodump or tell him something you know. Will fantasize about you having to work on a body he killed. Its exciting to him how vastly different yet oh so similar your guys interests are :D. He asks you suspicious questions all the time too. "Hey, where would you have to hit if you wanted to keep someone alive but also paralyze them? Like,, with a knife or something." "hey babe, what happens if you accidentally stab through your thigh? do you, like, bleed to death or do you still live?" "Babe, I need to know something. How hard do you have to hit someone in the head with a blunt object for it to kill them? Like, do you have to cave their skull in or can you just keep it in one piece but still kill the person???" If you dont know hes one of the ghostfaces already, he wont tell you for a long time. One time, after he asked a lot of extremely suspicious questions, you made some joke about him being a murderer. He laughed but then his face went blank. "What if i was?" and anyway he told you the truth and was in awe that you didnt leave him. yeah you guys are in love.

hope you like your pairing! sorry for how damn late this was. If you havent seen my post, i was on vacation for a week and had 0 internet so i had to take break. have a wonderful day/night!

[s0lar-ch3ri]

out of context things for a fic im reading (its from my mutual, and i might update my unfinished oneshot for gill after...and do a big oneshot seperation lol)

fic link for people who havent read it yet GO DO THAT NOW EVEN IF YOUVE ALREADY READ IT REREAD IT AND COMPLIMENT IT THIS IS ALL ABOUT CHAPTER 5

im adding "This letter is filled with glitter. If you open it you will be too." in some way shape or form into my vocab its beautiful

i honestly thought that jay was gonna say gill and OH MY GOD THATD BE SO FUNNY AND KINDA ANGSTY IF DONE IN A CERTIAN WAY LOL

(honestly kinda a fic idea there: ava gets help from lizzie as they learn lizzies brother [chip] believes that gillion likes ava or smth. i wanna see the siblings helping their siblings come together)

...oh the heart refs are starting

"He did. She screamed." pure comedy imo

"He kind of liked that idea, he needed more mean girl friends (one can never have too many)." SCREAMING MUTUAL YOU KNOW THE LESBIANS SO WELL AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

...mutual. im not your mother father or parent i wanna put you in timeout AHHHH WHY THESE REFS

mutual. hey. you dont need to remind us. you can let us be happy.

i wonder what the title of the fic means btw

as someone who calls their friend pookie, MISS FERIN DIDNT FUCKING STUTTER

"Stress shouldn’t be real, it was stupid." PREACH!

OH MY GOD HE SAID THAT BEFORE THE KISS HES SO GAY YOUR HONOR GAY AS HELL

FUCK ME I CAN IMAGINE GILLS VOICE SAYING THAT HANG ON IF I DO AN OUT LOUD IMPRESSION...

fuck it is as riduclous as it appears

bro jay and ensa have had a "they/them pussy" moment together and i see it thats the fucking look on their faces good for them

OH. I SEE. GAY "SEX" THEN DEATH. FUCK

he found his kid got a bitch and was so shocked and happy he fucking died

"But then again, maybe he deserved it." chip babygirl you make no sense

wait chips 17 here. 2 years away from being 19. the canon age. oh nononononononono

hey. anybody else notice a pretty big character of chips past hasnt been brought up yet? like, fucking price. the guy thats believed to have mistreated chip. the guy who made chip kill a man. MUTUAL WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING.

okay so i have a theory. my mutual doesnt plan on giving chip a break, hes just lost his dad unknowingly how, hes currently 17, and price hasnt been mentioned ONCE. characters act pretty similar to canon, including how theyve been mistreated in a sense (seen by the elders). the title (You'll Forget (It's Not Your Fault)) doesnt seem any good.

my theory? following the canon idea that chip has been through so much he easily forgot about kenta and his nightmare shit, chips gonna be dealing with price, and i dont think its gonna be just for a couple months. price is behind arlins shit, and price gonna make chip think this shit is all his fault.

oh nvm checked tags REDO THEORY

minor character death probs means you know who if you read it i dont wanna say it cause big spioier uhhhh READ IT OKAY IM SAYING IT NOW arlin, but from the beginning its had memory loss (how i didnt notice this before is beyond me) so im thinking its caused by like bad shit that happens (price is going to fuck with him more and ill sob) and hes blaming himself for it cause he thinks all thats happening including the memory loss is because hes doing shit wrong

(from what i know, depression and shit can cause memory loss BUT im not sure ill be back with results tmr on this so until then REBLOGS OFF)

check my mutual out or ill llegally have to eat you (on tumblr @red-might-be-dead)

[quarktrinity]

quark watches star trek season 2 episode 13

kirk slaps space rock

reusing those fog machines from a few episodes ago i see

obviously reversed footage of fog spilling out to make it look like its going back in

kirk has a trauma trigger in the smell of space honey

kirk says gaseous clouds are evil and should be killed

oh god all these guys are wearing red shirts and theres an evil cloud out and about. get out of there guys

evil space cloud using its glitter powers

nooooooo not the red shiiiiirrrrts noooooooooo

"something that cant possibly exist, but it does" thats the plot of like every episode dude. dont you watch your own show

shatner? i hardly know er!

just thought of that joke. im a genius

this episode is called "obsession". im so excited

space cloud vampire

i should add a square on the bingo card called "were going to be late to our space obligation because we have to resolve this plot first"

kirk has space ptsd

another lovecraftian episode

so the titular obsession is kirks. got it

new security officer. is he evil

kirk is so short

lets kill space gas dracula

SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA

nooooooooooo not the red shiiiiiiiirrrrrrts nooooooooooooo

so crazy how they died. cant believe it. on this show? unprecedented

kirk has a vaguely homoerotic determination to kill space gas dracula

kirk says your reflexes suck youre fired

new security officer is very embarrassed and sad

kirk you need a xanax

"i need your advice" "then i need a drink" make out

so space gas dracula is kirks traumatic backstory. i already knew that but thanks spock

new security officers dad was murdered by space gas dracula. i love drama

kirk? having guilt? crazy

ohhhh this is so good, kirks projecting his own guilt onto the new security officer. i love when kirk has something psychological going on

mccoys gonna diagnose kirk with ptsd. im so excited

kirk shut up and let your bfs give u therapy

lets kill space gas dracula... 2!

so why is warp 8 dangerous. im not sure

SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA

kirk has to Let Go

this episode is awesome

"your self pity is a terrible first course. why dont you try the soup instead?"

"this is [mccoys] officially logged prescription for you. it has one word on it: eat." i love this show

oh my god she was bullshitting him to get him to eat. this show is so good.

new security officer in a fit of anger throws his dish

wow so weird how conventional weapons dont work on the evil space cloud

is this supposed to be moby dick

SPACE GAS DRACULA HAS ENTERED THE SHIP

spock says your guilt is irrational, get therapy

SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA

is spock immune to space gas dracula

obviously reversed footage... 2!

spocks Fine

space gas dracula thinks spocks blood is gross

i love kirk so much

kirk gives himself therapy through the power of projection. hold a mirror in front of someone elses face and tell them theyre beautiful

this is like if moby dick and dracula had a beautiful love child and left it in the care of hp lovecraft and then drained the racism out of it

oh so NOW this show knows how antimatter works

kirk once again keeps spock safe

the writers are once again terrified of nuclear bombs

SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA SPACE GAS DRACULA

kirks uses himself as bait, new security guy gets in a physical fight with him about it

oh hes not? ok

oh he is hes just gonna make it out in time alright

BOOM GET EXPLODED IDIOT

were losing the security guy arent we

nope hes fine

spock says who needs god when you have me

kirk solves this dudes daddy issues

yaaayyyyyyyyyy

that episode was great

[theluckyr]

Hello friend! Was wondering if you'd have some time for another request of mine?

Could you maybe do your precious self aware au, where gn reader is playing Val and theyre silently watching without reader knowing, and reader is topfragging and they just got an ace. How would they react, and how would reader react to them watching?

Please take all the time you need, dont rush :)

Characters - Yoru, and whoever you want.

Remember to take care of yourself and eat well~!

I know who you are, no need to hide btw

Clean Sweep

Yoru

Whenever (y/n) choose him, he can only sense something stupid and disaster might happened to both of them.

But boy oh boy, he was wrong.

This time, they made his movement stiff to act like his decoy.

And the enemies didn't even shoot him. Not a single bullet grazed his body.

When they moved far enough, they went in for the kill. All five of them.

“MY VERY FIRST ACE AS A DUELIST, WOO!!!” they yelled in happiness

Yoru were impressed (so you do have some strats) and in the next round, he gave (y/n) some “helping hand” From where to use his gatecrash and blindside. Then won and be the match MVP.

If (y/n)’s ace were recorded and posted on the internet, He will be very smug about it while his friends were seething in anger.

To celebrate (y/n)’s first ace, he sent them the infamous stylish butterfly comb melee himself with his message left on the chat.

“Not bad, good job"

Cypher

You know where to put his wires and cage really melt his heart and just go 🤍🖤💜💙💚❤️💗♥️💛💞💓💙💘💙💘💗💘🤍💞💓💗💚💟❣️💚💘💗💓💘🤍🤎💝💜💗💘💜💘🤎💝💕

So, time to play the waiting game.

When the enemy fell into his traps, they would go for the kill.

While the last enemy to defuse the spike, (y/n) sneaked behind them then greeted them before shooting them.

He really try not to laugh and (y/n) making it hard to do it.

Overall, very proud of you.

Reyna

If (y/n) was saving in a few rounds for operator, that means business.

Just right when (y/n) entry, they immediately kill enemy on haven.

To witness (y/n) run around, quick scoping the enemies with was impressive but at the same time terrifying for the enemy team.

After a few more rounds, the enemy team surrendered which it was a relief.

“Phew… Thank God it was on compe, I’m back on Silver!”

If (y/n) decide to queue up for compe again, she will instalock herself to (y/n). If someone talks thrash on comm or calls them out on the chat for instalock her. So what? Cry about it.

[thegeminisage]

YOOOOO this music FUCKS. alright go off

BIG slime patch over there...yikes...possibly it's alive lol

once again, multiple "objectives"...i have to very reluctantly admit i'm just a TINY bit disappointed. i wanted Dungeons. these are just divine beasts with different aesthetics :/

it's fine if that's what they wanted to do but why advertise them as proper dungeons.....

i love that immediately i can't figure out a puzzle <3 thank you zelda devs for making me suffer absolutely nothing has changed since 98

WAHHHH mipha's theme coming into this...thats just cruel.............

OH and it's also got the theme that played when you rode into vah ruta on sidon's back...

SQUID? SHARK? SQUIDSHARK? WTF WAS THAT??????

that boss was FUCKING. BULLSHIT. i used every bomb i had and all but 30 arrows. i had almost a hundred when the fight started. FUCK that out loud

this sage sounds SO much like mipha. like her enunciation is IDENTICAL. am i imagining this?? i tried to look it up on imdb and failed utterly

NO WAIT I FOUND IT SHE IS IN THIS GAME THAT MUST BE HERE....................WHAT A COOL CAMEO i'm totally counting that as my bingo square

oh my god the helmets are so COOOOLLL she has an elephant design!!!!!

i always forget how comically large sidon is until you put him next to short king link

this hand-holding business along with the vows was reparations for nintendo sinning against link/sidon fans. i'm so sorry monarchs

sidon's sagehood feels so different to tulin's...it's like he finally came into something he was waiting for, vs tulin who was just a little underprepared. which is wild because tulin WAS waiting for it actively and sidon was not, but like...vibeswise. sidon needed the push and tulin needed the opposite. idk. it's late.

awwww dorephan is alive after all he's getting better <3 cmon nintendo would never KILL people (hoping i dont eat those words)

wait, if rauru's been dead all along does that count as "someone dies"? hmm

omg we're literally crowning sidon rn okayyy lol is he gonna get married too

wow. they literally did just call her the queen. okay??

i'm trying so hard to like her but lol

"i and my partner in life and leadership" COME ON. SHE JUST SHOWS UP AND GETS TO BE QUEEN......i'm so sorry girl. whats that fucking post like "sorry i cant defend you"

have sidequests to find the rest of the zora armor but liiiike...there's so much other stuff i wanna check out. def comign back for it tho

[ahaura]

yellowjackets S2E6 lb

do babies get fucked up in utero if their mom is 1) starving all the time and 2) a cannibal?

in my public school they apparently used to show a horrific pregnancy video that was meant to ward kids off from having sex but instead of us getting to see it we got to take care of a baby doll that cried all the time and it fucking sucked

misty threatening to report lottie to the IRS is so funny <3

let's play the game of "will they remember not to talk to the cops and only say I WANT MY LAWYER" (im betting they wont)

"i didnt drag callie into anything" YOU LITERALLY CONFESSED TO MURDERING THE MAN YOU WERE HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH TO YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER SHAUNA IT IS IN FACT YOUR FAULT! fail family for the win <3

"it honestly would have been better if you had just had sex with him" SHAUNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA JFFJDSKFJDKFDSFKDHDSJFH SHES FUCKING CRAZY

the girls are panicking in the wake of the birth yes CHAOS YESSSSSSSSSSS

LISA MY GIRL LISA depressed girls stick together<3

natalie finally opening up lets gooooooo

"maybe we did it to survive but i dont think we deserve to" YEEHAW

doing cult shit in a fit of desperation which will result in the cementing of the cult mentality OR permanently fracture the group. or something idk

saint charlotte of new jersey up and attem

rip coach being stuck in a cabin with cannibals as he slowly wastes away while one of his students is giving birth and he cannot do anything

WHAT THE FUCK JUST CAME OUT OF SHAUNA

helluva time for misty to have a breaking point btw

WHAT THE FUCK CAME OUT OF SHAUNA I NEED TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

my ass is NEVER giving birth my pelvic bone hurts just watching this FUCK that i will get my tubes tied if i can find a doctor who will let me god willing

i do think as a treat shauna should fuck up the cop just a little bit like stab him or something ok DO IT

was shauna pulled back from the brink of death in childbirth because her friends prayed to the thing that lives in the woods and it dragged her back to the land of the living. because that would fucking rock.

THE BABY LIVED? IS THIS REAL OR A HALLUCINATION

lisa i love you lisa from yellowjackets my girl who is unfortunately in a cult but at least knows compassion is where healing starts

the relief of the baby being born alive and shauna living through childbirth is shortlived i see shauna is too malnourished to make milk which means the baby is gonna die. OR they will eat coach or someone or maybe akilah's mouse to feed it. or something idk

jeff sitting outside the police station in his minivan being useless while listening to fuck the police on the aux cord

SHAUNA IS MISSING OUT ON THE REUNION? SHE BETTER NOT!

DO NOT TALK TO THE COPS DO NOT TALK TO THE COPS PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD (i know they are its still painful)

IF COPS HAD THE EVIDENCE THEY WOULD ARREST YOU IF YOU ARE NOT UNDER ARREST YOU SHOULD BE FREE TO GO CALL A LAWYERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

CALLIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHES GOT TEETH!

IS LOTTIE BREASTFEEDING?

natalie failed to kill lisa's fish<3 we love to see it

THE GANG'S BACK TOGETHER AGAIN!

OH MY GOD

IT WAS ALL A HALLUCINATION????? FUCK

also shauna's teenager actress deserves like 30 emmys shes going NUTS

[draconic-hazard]

Finally decided to watch amphibia and decided to write down my thoughts as I watch

-In the first episode while they’re fighting the big mantis when Anne yells “do something!” Her eyes flare blue. I feel like that’s gonna come up later

-Is Anne like, physically stronger than the frog people? Cause she held the mantis claws off of Sprig by herself.

-Box? Box from opening theme? PLOT BOX???

-Plot box.

-I didn’t know how to feel about Anne’s friends since it looks like they made her shoplift the plot box.

-Or maybe Anne just likes crime

-Where did Sprig get a snake skeleton? Are snakes like, a thing here?

-Anne you need better friends

-oh okay so snakes are just a thing here

-Polly craves violence.

-Oh boy plot! Who doesn’t love a good PLOT?

-why does Anne just, have all that stuff on her? Who just carries a tire pump with them?

-An axolotl! So this isn’t just a frog world but all amphibians. I probably should have guessed that from the shows title but I never claimed to be smart

-Why do the doom tree look like a living thing? Is it gonna be a stick bug?

-called it im the smartest person alive

-What. Is. That.

-clicky pen :D

-beat the bugs!

-Why ls there an alien in the flooded basement?

-I have heard several stories of friendships being ruined upon becoming room mates

-Wait are frogs cold-blooded? I gotta look that up

-turns out they are. Neat

-WHERE DID ANNE GET ALL HER CLOTHES? SHE WASNT PLANNING ON GOING TO FROGLAND? WHY DOD SHE HAVE HER CLOTHES PACKED?

-oh no

-« I have to go to the bathroom. »

-Basement alien…s???

-Spranne best friends forever

-oh no the snacks are gonna get soggy

-oh god not the cooking

-Ye Olde Ways

-Either Anne has cell service or she just randomly has Pizza.jpg saved on her phone

-Anne is canonically a pineapple pizza hater (same)

-Cow centipedes

-Frogland seems similar to the boiling isles, in that everything wants to kill and eat you

-Pacman to save your life

-that guy has been kidnapped by that dragonfly since episode one. Someone help him.

-Why does frog mayor sound like Bud Gleeful? Is it the same VA?

-None of these frogs can aim a mud clod to save their life

-I dont like that blue frog guy. Walter? Was that his name?

-Sprig has a weird habit of saying something in a weird was and then exiting the room refusing to break eye context with the person he just said the thing to

-my thumbs are no longer typing so I’m just gonna watch the show normally unless I see something I absolutely HAVE to mention