#incorrect batbros

[thebat-musicman]

Dick: Does anyone have any suggestions?

Jason: Why dont we shoot the Joker?

Dick: How that will help us in an alien invasion?

Jason: It would be really funny

Dick:

Dick: Works for me, add it to the list!

[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

*batkids going out in gotham for the night*

Bruce: And what do you do if you get stopped by the cops?

All of the kids: let Tim or Jason deal with it as the two white passing ones.

Bruce: Good, now go have fun.

[jasonsthunderthighs]

Dick: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Tim: My life is a little too much fall out and not enough boy.

Jason: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance

Damian: My life is a little too much imagination and not enough dragons.

Bruce: *Facepalmin* All I asked was how your weekend was.

[lizardpersonyknow]

Tim drake but he has a completely unexplainable beef with one of the lesser Gotham rogues. I'm thinking like kite man or something. Where anyone who sees him fight them feels the need to pull him aside because it sounds like he is deliberately digging in to deeply personal traumas of that villain to hurt them. He regularly makes this rogue cry. He only ever says "they know what they did". Asking the rogue? "I know what I did :(". And yet, the rogue still makes specific effort to trap him.

Years later it comes out that he and this rogue thought it was funny watching the batfam and Gotham's collective concern and confusion. I headcanon that every Gotham rogue has been to at least one summer camp for theatre. The rogue can cry on command. It's literally just a bit.

[91-1lover]

What if Damian and Tim love each other and even like? It's just more of a situation "Manipulating others is easier ". Maybe an example will help;

Damian: Father, May I go to Zoo today?

Bruce:No Damian, you're grounded.

Tim:Oh, that's bad. I could go with you to take photos of otter, but if you are not going I think I will stay too. What's a zoo without company. Maybe I will go with Kon next week.

Bruce *Super happy in a moment of thinking his youngest kids getting along*: If you two agree not to kill each other, Damian can go

Tim and Damian:*Knowing looks*

Or situation like;

Tim who has abandoned issues and is having fear of people leaving him: Dick is mad at me. Can you stab me so he will be in his mother hen mode Instead?

Damian who would like to have 5 minutes of peace from Grayson: Say no more

[reineydraws]

any fan of kakashi is a fan of jason todd send tweet

[incorrect-waynemanor]

dick: so, i got banned from jason’s safehouse because i’m apparently a “liability” and “reckless” and “dick”

dick: that last one’s just my name, but you should hear it the way jason says it

[goodoldfashionedengineer]

Tim: What are you guys' favorite cereals?

Damian: Cocoa Puffs

Tim: Good answer, good answer

Jason: Frosties

Dick: *turns to Jason* That is such a basic answer

Jason: So what?! They're good! Let me guess, yours is like Fruit Loops, the Tropical Edition or something!

Dick: No, who do you think I am?! Mine is obviously the "Super Crunch" Edition from 2005

Tim: The Superman cereal? The one that had wildberry, cherry AND cinnamon all in one box?

Damian: I doubt that those are still safe for consumption, Richard

Jason: You were asked to name your favourite cereal and you go ahead and are like "Oh, I like the Ford Bronco produced in 1993! Yes, it has to be from 1993 because the other ones suck actually!" Be a fucking person, Dick!

[sodamnbored]

Damian, entering the living room: Oh, Drake. I didn’t realise you were here too.

Tim, distracted on his phone on the couch: Yeah, best WiFi around. Keeping busy?

Damian, looking in cupboards and chandeliers for acrobatic older brothers: Looking for Dick.

Tim absently, not looking up from Grindr: Mm, me too.

[ryemiffie]

More of me and my bro as bat bros incorrect quotes:

Dick, accidentally clicking the wrong thing on the bat computer: Oh wait, shit, I didn't want you.

Tim, standing ominously behind him: That's what Bruce said when I became Robin.

Dick:

Tim:

Dick: Tim, noo..

[lithiumseven]

[thebat-musicman]

9 year old Dick: If you’re a friendless loser and you know it, clap your hands!

Bruce:

Dick: Clap. Your. Hands.

Bruce: *clap clap*

———

12 year old Jason: HEY YOU!

Jason: HEEEEEY YOU!

Jason: HEY! YOU!

Bruce: It’s not polite to not call people by their names, Robin.

Jason: Nice try, Hey You. I know my mentor’s name.

———

13 year old Tim: You see this coffee, Bruce?

Bruce: Thank you for making this for m-

Tim: This is my coffee. You are having water. Only people who don’t break mugger’s fingers get coffee.

———

Clark: Batman, your Robins are so polite. They must have been a joy to raise.

Bruce, through clenched teeth: Such a joy.

[youroriginalsublimecupcakestuff]

Dick, at the police station: hi, i'm here for jason.

officer: last name?

Dick : .....ah. you must be new.

[dc-and-damirae]

rando at a gala: If you don't mind me asking, what ever happened to your brother? dick: He died rando: Oh... I'm so sorry dick: Don't worry, he’s okay now rando: …Can you please clarify? dick: No

[lizardpersonyknow]

Damian, introduces self as "son of the bat" and "the blood son", expresses remorse but offers no apologies, speaks in convoluted manner, verbally acknowledges any debts he feels he owes and tries to pay them back asap, etc

My autism brain: aha, fey rules

[91-1lover]

Dick and Damian- *Fighting using an incredible strategy and hours of training*

Meanwhile

Jason- YEEEET *Throwing Tim at bad guys*