#pain diary

[mispogliodime-pervestirmidite]

[cuntyboii]

My pain is awful and I'm currently unsure when it will change if ever :(

[pink-flower-ace]

One of my knuckles is fucked up aching. I'm scared it's rheumatic.

I know it could also be like Spicy fibro flared by the humid weather and knitting, or like twisting it slightly out of place so its pinching a nerve or something.

But I'm scared and worried it's rheumatic. It would be pretty on track for my mom's timeline with it. Wish I knew what feeling it usually has but this fucking shit is bad enough to maybe keep me up all night 'cause it's a fucking sharp ache.

[judasdreams]

TMI

Tomorrow morning.

I need to get up at 04.00 or 04.30 at the latest. I don't know if I'll get a cab; maybe if there's money of my accounts, but taking public transport would save me a pretty penny and I think it'll be a while until I can use it again by myself.

I hope I haven't forgotten anything; I need to put my water bottle and hairbrush in my backpack still, but besides that. I feel like I have but tbh: if it's on this end and doesn't wholly affect my stay in the hospital, I don't care.

Trying to fucking sleep while my stomach and intestines are flip-flopping out of anxiety & trying to decide if they need to expel even MORE waste or if I'm just feeling sick because I haven't eaten properly the whole day, plus I have beautiful large splotches of eczema in both of my armpits. (But ofcourse I would: what better time for my entire body to get royally inflamed than pre-surgery.)

Fucking. Nerves.

Pain 7/10

Fatigue 7/10

[fraznik]

Short pain diary :’)

Face pain bad today.

1600mg ibuprofen(soon to be 2400mg) and 2000mg Tylenol alternated throughout the day with little to no relief.

The OTC pain meds are doing less by the day.

Got denied by my insurance appointed PCP because of a medication that I was prescribed that I don’t even take anymore. So may be longer before I can see a neurologist and get *actual medical treatment* vs OTC pain killers.

Considering hitting up an emergency room on Friday after work to see if I can get a referral there. Our ER in town is relatively good and I think I could convince my insurance to pay for the visit.

Lidocaine cream got here a week earlier than expected, so that’s a win. I’m not sure if it’s actually helping but if I can placebo my way into feeling better I will mf do it.

Hair down today definitely helped a little bit but minimal.

Will I ever feel relief again? Will the tiredness of the chronic pain ever leave me? I am already so tired after just dealing with this for a few months. It is more exhausting because I don’t know if this is a random event or from a dental injury, or possible MS, or a tumor, or blood vessel pushing against the nerve, or what. I am scared.

I am so sorry to those who have been dealing with chronic pain for longer than I have. You are strong, and beautiful, and seen. I see you. I love you. I commend you for your efforts in fighting this beast- day in and day out- whether it’s nerve pain, muscular pain, general pain or whathaveyou. Keep fighting. I am proud of you, every day. I am thinking of you and I am praying for us all.

I am so exhausted.

But I will fight another day.

And I hope you do too.

[chronically-mars]

I never truly knew the meaning of friendship until I became chronically ill and disabled. When my health declined I had people leaving left and right because I couldn’t keep up with other teenagers. I stopped having people check on me, I stopped getting invited to stuff, stopped being included, until I just got left behind. Now as an adult I found friends who check up on me, make sure whatever we do is accessible to me, always making me feel included, they are my support system.

Check up on your chronically ill and disabled friends, keep including them in stuff even if they have to end up canceling it. Being excluded for something you have no control over is horrible and no one should go through that.

[honeyedslut]

"it's too big, it'll hurt-" "good. bend over"

[worthless-misery]

Dear diary...

The fact that I'm still "alive" in 2024 just feels like a huge mistake...

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

Just caught up with Dracula Daily and it just tears me apart how desperately everyone loves Lucy, and how desperately everyone wants to save her, and how fully she loves everyone in thanks. From Mina running through half the town to rescue her from her sleep-walking, to Arthur giving all the blood he can and then some for her sake, to Dr Seward and Van Helsing giving blood themselves and keeping watch through the night, to her maids begging to keep watch over her, to her mother’s solicitude for her health, to the tenderness of her words in her diary. It’s all a labour of love and desperation, and it is devastating that the Count manages to snatch her away despite it all.

[greyjay19]

let's begin

hello all! my name is grey jay, not actually. this is my diary or journal, whatever you want to call it this is where i will chronicle the events of my life and my internal workings. as anonymously as possible, obviously that means that all names including my own will be changed. to make things easier for my self each person in my life will be referred to as different birds. i adore birds obviously. the people closest to me will be given names of different corvids, including myself. other than pets, i feel that pets' names are rather common.i don't know why i am explaining so much. my family recently adopted a cat, i've deemed him oberon even though his given name was obi. he is struggling with the adjustment period. he's been aggressive and recently attacked me pretty bad. it makes me so sad, i just want to love him but he's been through a lot and it's hard to read him. mind you i've always had a hard time reading others, though usually i can read animals rather well. perhaps it's because i haven't had a ton of experience with other cats, all the cats i've met have been pretty friendly and kind. don't get me wrong, oberon is the sweetest little baby when he's not stand offish or trying to attack someone. i guess i'm just trying figure out his boundaries; he's figuring out ours. i don't even know. i need to go to bed; even though i probably won't sleep much. i do need to go back to school tomorrow. hopefully the dorms will be quieter over the next few weeks.

i should mention i have a chronic pain syndrome so i will be ranking my pain through out the week. my plan is to upload an entry every night.

pain: 7/10

[asphalt-eater]

"Yeah, so apparently while mom and Rodrick were at the zoo, they got kidnapped and Rodrick killed a man."

[ID: The scene at the end of Saw VI where William Easton gets dissolved by acid, drawn in the Diary of a Wimpy Kid style. Brent and Tara Abbott are replaced by Rodrick and Mom Heffley respectively. William looks resigned with the bottom half of his body turned into goop. End ID.]

[egg-boy]

this comic is a metaphor but also real

[externalmemorycomic]

(If you wanna read more comics, I’ve posted over 400(!!!!) of them on my patreon where you can read daily comics for just 3€ a month! I use my patreon income for bills and stuff and any contribution makes a really big difference. Check out the link in my pinned post if you want to join!)

[bakedbananners]

I don’t really care about “defining” Murderbot and ART’s relationship I think they’re both uniquely insane human-adjacent but Not Quite sentiences that defy total human comprehension. Murderbot is the only way ART can contextualize human experience. ART is how Murderbot allows itself to be vulnerable because it literally doesn't let it be alone in its brain where it can generate 5 trillion faulty risk assessments per second. ART gaslights Murderbot into thinking it died and then shoots missiles at the colony when it gets kidnapped. They made a kamikaze AI baby together.

[jessmalia]

The Vampire Diaries 6.07 Do You Remember the First Time?