#really we lost all social touches we used to have because of how work is now

[fly-sky-high-09]

Man today sure is something

[couldeatthatgirlforlunch]

Just a concept, Yandere!Dimensional traveler!Batman X Gn!reader X Platonic!Batfam, also wrote a one shot about this

Synopsis: Batman becomes obsessed with a spouse and kids that he never had.

Pairing: Yandere!Dimensional traveler!Batman X Reader; Batman X Reader; Platonic Batfam X Batparent!Reader; Yandere!Batman X Platonic!Batfam; Batman X Platonic!Batfam

Tw: English is not my first language; mentions of Alfred being dead; I'm quite new on the fandom so there might be some mistakes about facts of the original comics, but this is a fanfic so whatever; this piece is more focused on Bruce and the batfam while still mentioning reader; stalker and delusional Bruce.

Word count: 1,4k

Requested? No.

General masterlist

Yandere!Batman who is very VERY, extremely, lonely, touch starved and grim. He’s also very unlucky apparently.

He never even met Dick. Sure, he heard about what happened to The Flying Graysons, investigated it even, but he's only seem him on pictures, videos or in passing, but he wasn’t there that night, he never talked to him, or maybe he did while stopping him from killing Zuko, either way, never adopted him, our boy went straight to orphanage and was adopted shortly after by a normal and loving family.

Actually this universe’s Bruce never met nor connected with ANY of his children, all he had was Alfred, and yet… Something happened and…

Safe to say it's been long, never ending harsh years.

The only thing this Bruce knows is pain, loneliness and misery. Don’t talk to him about Alfred. Maybe he can't even look at pictures. When he realized he couldn’t remember his voice anymore… He WON’T watch videos or listen to audio of him. Yes, Alfred being gone was one more trauma to the list of traumas he will carry on his tense and burdened shoulders for the rest of his helpless existence.

This Bruce is a loser, closer to madness than any version of Bruce (aside from Batman who laughs). His Gotham is nearing it’s doom. He didn't join the Justice League because of his level of emotional masochism, pride and lack of will to get back on his feet. He is so used to suffering he thinks it's possible to die if he doesn't have such bitter companion. Safe to say, he is depressed. And hyperfocused on saving a city he’s been working in for decades, too blind by his grieving to see that he is not doing the right things. There is no social projects on Wayne Enterprises or Wayne Foundation to help people, he neglected the company decades ago. He is almost becoming Michael Keaton’s Batman in The Flash.

Somehow, one day he is sent to another universe. It can be through some disaster like Crisis in Infinite Earths, or some villain who wanted different variants of heros to fight amongst themselves to death, doesn't really matter here, what’s important is that he (after years of being a hermit on his cave) interacts with people, more specifically, he interacts with himself.

Or definitely a lucky version of himself. Maybe the luckiest. He is jealous.

During the whole event they interact and imagine how he felt when he found out that this other Batman has an Alfred. And he is so successful that he is a billionaire who uses his money to help Gotham get better (or as good as we know Gotham can get). Oh, and he has a spouse. And children. Plural. So many he lost count. And pets. Two dogs, one cat, a cow (?), a turkey (a what now?) and a fREAKING DRAGON BAT (WHAT THA FUCK IS EVEN THAT????!?!?????!).

He is also more put together (looks like he showers and doesn't skip meals). And less temperamental.

Okay…

Bruce is confused. When he comes back to his universe, with a spark of hope in his heart, he does his research. He could start actually making effort on his company and thus helping Gotham, maybe even be good enough as a vigilant that he could join the Justice League and make some friends (even if the other Bruce was just as stoic, he was the only one who could see on his micro expressions while talking about them how fond he was of his colleagues, and how much he thrusts them, even with his trust issues).

He could find those damn kids and adopt them. Find the one who somehow managed to make him open up enough for a relationship.

(He could also just work on his company, philanthropism, do some therapy, make some new organic connections or whatever).

He is VERY disappointed to find out that some of those so called kids and are already adults, have lived their whole lives without him, maybe some have been arrested or even dead, they have their whole lives and families that have NOTHING to do with him. Some don't even exist (the only explanation for not a single clue in months of research). And his partner, Reader, is either living their own life that doesn't allow space for him or also dead. He lost his timing. He is old and lost his timing. He is alone. He shouldn't have hoped so much that he got blind by the improbability of the small chance. The other Batman did mention that his family started growing decades ago.

He just lost another family. This one he never got to have. He wishes he never knew about them.

He hyperfocused on them for months for nothing (hey, It was hard to find info on the ones that don't live a very civilian legal life, like Cassandra, or the ones that never even existed, like Damian, or the ones that are dead — again maybe Cassandra, or perhaps Jason. Maybe Jason joined a gang just for survival or something like that, life on the streets is harsh, and he is not very lucky. And I’m not even being specific on what could have happened to every single one of the batfam. Also Tim is probably a CEO right now). No connection and family will come from all of that. Especially because he is greedy, starved, he doesn't want bits and pieces, he wants it ALL. He wants that other Bruce's life.

Yandere!Batman is born. He drowns and gets drunk on the pit of his own madness and he can’t get out of it. Doesn't want to.

He could… He could get rid of the people on their lives, brainwash them and make them a happy family. They aren’t vigilantes, they don't have his abilities, they don't have his intellect, it won't be hard.

Of course, Batman doesn't kill, but this Batman is looking for a change.

But they aren't what lucky-billionaire-put-together Bruce had.

Don't get me wrong. He is not just petty and jealous, nor resents Bruce for his privileges and better decisions, or whatever.

Okay, maybe a little. Why? Just why ones life was perfect (hello? Didn't you hear the part where he told you his own problems? Not even about the DEAD RESURRECTED CRIME LORD SON?) while the others had to draw the short stick?

But majorly he is just desperate, foaming at the mouth for a happy ending, and projected all of that on that poor random bat.

Now, enough brooding, back to solutions.

He could clone them.

Could work. Not exactly easy but he could just hack onto Luthor archives until he found how he cloned Superman and made that Superboy, Superman, or whatever he goes by now.

Again, not the same as the original ones. The ones he craves. The ones he wants.

Alfred is screaming in his grave about how Bruce, please, needs to realize that no one will fill the expectations he puts on them, not even the “original ones”.

Another hard, but better fitted solution is to… Simply… Find a way to go to that other universe, or one similar enough, stalk and study their whole lives until he can perfectly replicate “lucky” Bruce’s persona, and just… Get rid of him and take his place. Hello Alfred, hello honey, hello kids, daddy’s home.

Looks like he finally got luck on his side, maybe the sun will rise tomorrow.

Yandere!Bruce won't just brush aside that he is rusty and definitely not a better Batman then the other one, but he's got time. He will developt patience. But can he learn enough to trick his perfect vigilant kids though? Is he seriously thinking straight? I mean, the batkids are dope though. They learned from the best. As a proud (wannabe) father he knows they will be better than him one day, perhaps already are.

How much of watching their lives, everything that he craves, can he take until he snaps? How much of watching Bruce's interactions with them can he take? He swears he won't take them for granted when he has them, he will take care of them, protect them, be a family, be happy.

Can he really keep his distance?

Looks like another supervillain just arrived in Gotham for the batfamily to battle against, he is quite persistent though.

Like, comment and reblog 🥰

[thisapplepielife]

Written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles December challenge.

Crumb Together

Prompt Day 27: Coffee Shop AU | Word Count: 1000 | Rating: T | CW: Language | Tags: Modern AU, Meet-Cute, Platonic Stobin, Coffee Shop/Bakery AU, Fluff, Steve POV

Steve is carefully filling the bakery case. He's been here since three a.m., and it's still a half-hour until opening, but at least he's on time and not behind schedule for once. 

"Hey dingus, do we need more muffins?" Robin hollers, banging through the double-doors from the back to the front. 

"No, I have enough, thanks so much," he snaps. He's snippy this morning, pretty mad she ever talked him into this whole coffee shop scheme. Sure, they're retail pros, but small business owners? He should have said no fucking way. But she was excited, and he wanted her to be happy. That’s always his downfall.

He's definitely re-thinking that now that they’ve completely lost their social lives by keeping these insane working and sleeping schedules. They only see each other, which isn't the worst thing in the world, other than the fact that he doesn't know the last time he's touched boobies. Or dick. He's not picky. 

He needs to get laid, and he can’t do that stuck inside this coffee shop slash bakery hell with his best friend.

He's about to turn and sass her, when someone taps on the front door and he jumps, throwing a chocolate muffin up into the air, fumbling it around, before finally regaining control. 

He didn't drop it, but it looks a little worse for wear. He can't sell it like this. 

Well, fuck.

If he was a hired hand, he'd ignore the annoying tapper until the official opening time. Which is twenty-nine minutes from now. But as the owner, he puts down his tray and walks towards the door. They could use the paying customer, even if they’ve shown up way too early, like a rude asshole.

He looks, but he can't see anyone out there in the dark. Maybe he should ignore it.

He doesn't, instead he unlocks the door, and there's a guy standing there. 

"Hey, nice catch," the guy says, smiling. 

Steve forces a smile in return, "How can I help you?" 

"I know you're not open yet, but I saw you in there juggling the muffins, and I'm on my way out of town and really need a cup of coffee. My coffee maker decided this was the morning to croak," he says, slashing his whole hand across his neck, making a throat-slitting motion. 

He's rambling, like Robin.

Steve finds it a little cuter on him, than he does when Robin does it at this ungodly hour. 

Steve sighs, and opens the door wider to let him inside, "You just want black coffee?" 

"Please," the guy says. 

"I'll have to brew it. It'll just take a minute." 

"Thank you, you're a lifesaver," he says, and Steve can see that he's looking at Steve's chest, looking for a name tag. But Steve's not wearing one. Because as the owner, he finally doesn't have to. 

Robin is booting up the point-of-sale system, "Black coffee?" she repeats. 

The guy nods. 

"For?" 

"Eddie," the guy answers. 

"Good thing you asked him, I'd never know who to hand it to," Steve snarks at Robin, starting the coffee machine.

Eddie laughs.

Robin doesn't.

When it's done, Steve places the cup on the counter, and Robin immediately picks it up and writes Eddie's name on it. 

Which, that's stupid. They all know it's Eddie's coffee. Then, Robin sacks up the slightly banged up muffin and hands it to Eddie.

"You scared him and caused him to squish it. So, it's yours. On the house!" she says, far too chipper for this time of morning. 

"Thanks, I'll try to drop by and scare him more often," Eddie says, reading his name on his cup, grinning. Then Eddie slides a ten dollar bill across the counter, waving off his change. 

As soon as the bell on the door jangles, signaling Eddie's departure, Robin turns and slaps Steve on the arm. 

"What the hell? That cute boy wanted to flirt, and you totally dropped the ball, dingus!" 

Steve scrunches up his forehead, "Huh?"

Robin just shakes her head, annoyed, and heads back towards the kitchen.

Is Steve so rusty that he missed flirting? Goddamnit. 

Steve has just turned the front door lock, and flipped the sign to closed, when he hears his cell phone ringing somewhere in the distance. He follows the sound, and when he picks it up, it's a number he doesn't recognize. Great. More telemarketer bullshit. 

He goes to swipe the decline button, when Robin shouts, "You better get that!"

He looks back at his phone and cautiously accepts the call, not knowing what the hell she's done now.

"Hello?"

"Is this Steve? From the coffee shop?"

"Yeah, this is Steve," Steve says, suspicious. He has no idea who he's talking to.

"Good, good. This is Eddie. From this morning. The coffee jerk that made you open early."

"Oh, uh, okay. Um…"

"How did I get this number?" Eddie asks, laughing.

"Yeah, that was what I was thinking," Steve admits.

"Well, somehow it ended up written on my coffee cup this morning, with your name and a time to call."

Steve shakes his head, Robin is such an asshole, but Steve smiles.

"Well, I'm not sure how that happened," Steve says, teasing back. Flirting. 

"Big mystery," Eddie teases, "but since I've got you on the phone, would you like to grab dinner or drinks. Coffee?"

"No coffee," Steve laughs, "but yes. To the other two, for sure. But be forewarned, I eat really early. Like an old person. Early bird specials are my jam. And I go to bed by nine. Eight-thirty if I can get away with it. I gotta be here by three to get ready to open this place."

He's learned to get that info out of the way, early. 

"Well, that sounds perfect. I get up at four to get to my jobsite. I'm in construction," Eddie says.

Steve smiles, it's been a while since anyone has understood his schedule.

"So, dinner? Four-thirty or five?" Eddie asks, and Steve laughs.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddieholidaydrabbles and follow along with the fun! ☕

If you want to see more of my entries into this month-long challenge, you can check them out in my Steddie Holiday Drabbles tag, right here!

[sapphicseasapphire]

Chain as Cryptids au: Huggability

My back hurts, have some comfort! Characters are ranked by who gives the best hugs to the worst hugs, and a little bit of an explanation!

(Under the cut because long)

1. Sky

Do I really need to explain myself? He’s Sky. He’s the softest, sweetest, most cuddly hero to ever exist and we love him for that. He’s kind of known for taking a random hero into his arms, wrapping his mighty wings around them, and then flopping onto the ground and falling asleep. He’s just. So soft. His wings? So warm. Every hero- even Legend, who’s pretty touch averse- would kill to be wrapped up in his crimson feathers. (Eh, except maybe Time. At first). He has a knack for finding whichever Link needs a hug the most and seeking them out.

2. Twilight:

This guy? Is extremely gentle. He’s so incredibly strong but also so incredibly soft. His Hylian hugs are second only to Sky’s, but he also had the added bonus of being a Shapeshifter! One moment, he’s got a Link all wrapped up in his arms and the next, he’s a purring cat on their lap. A wolf wrapped protectively around them. Warm and cuddly and always so careful. Gotta love Twilight.

3. Suprisingly (?), Legend:

Legend’s pretty touch averse most of the time. But when people need him, he’s there. He has so much love in his heart that he keeps bottled up. He has experience, and he has a knack for reading people. He knows exactly what they need.

4. Wind:

Little big brother. He’s surprisingly good at comforting the others and when he wants to be, he’s biggest cuddle bug in the world (second only to Sky, I guess haha). He’s really good at curling up and holding on tight, and he definitely 100% uses his younger age to his advantage. You wouldn’t tell the child to let go, right? You wouldn’t tell the child to get up. Even though, in reality, he’s comforting them more than they’re comforting him. He lets them think that they’re being the strong ones- it’s his little trick haha.

5. Hyrule:

Little guy. His hugs are always warm and gentle since he’s absolutely buzzing with magic. Fairy magic is inherently healing, so even if he’s not actively casting spells, the others are affected by his Good Vibes when they hug him! Having a bad day? Not anymore, Hyrule won’t let it happen. (Disclaimer: when he’s in his True Form, the two inch tall fairy, it isn’t wise for the others to try to hug him. Unless they’re Four and are also two inches tall.)

6. Ravio:

TOUCH STARVED BABY!!! GIVE HIM A HUG!!! Ravio is so eager to be affectionate haha! He kind of jumps directly on top of Legend like all the time, and when be hugs people, be squeezes them tightly as if he’s making up for lost time. While this is comforting to some, it might catch others off guard. I think he should be tied with Hyrule and Four but that’s not how these things work haha.

7. Four:

Four’s hugs are good hugs! They would be higher up on the list if it weren’t for their horns getting in the way. Sky’s go-to move is to rest his chin on peoples’ heads when he cuddles, but the top of Four’s head is deadly. Because they’re shorter than almost everyone in the Chain, the horns will get in the way. It’s no problem! The others can work around them! But they are gonna knock them down a few points. Sorry, Four.

8. Time:

This man. This God. Is so incredibly bad at being social. He’s awkward and not very good at reading social cues. And that’s not because he’s not mortal, it’s because he was raised by a tree. He’s not sure when it’s appropriate to hug the other Links (he’s more confident with Malon and his children), so he just tends to leave them alone. His philosophy, in this and in everything, is that if he gives them space, they’ll eventually come to him. That’s… not always correct. His hugs have great potential- he’s big and gentle- but he can’t give good hugs if he doesn’t give hugs.

9. Wild:

Wild doesn’t really… hug. He’ll sit next to a Link and flop against them. He’ll lean. But he doesn’t quite understand to wrap his arms around, and he doesn’t respond well to someone wrapping their arms around him, feeling trapped. So the leaning is about as close as they’re gonna get haha! And that’s perfectly fine! He’s not heavy (like at all) but he is warm (absolutely buzzing with spirit magic), so he’s always a welcome snuggle buddy. Just as long as he doesn’t try to steal their things while he’s half on top of them haha!

10. Warriors:

I’m sorry, I truly am. He’s a sword. He doesn’t do hugs. And even if he did, his physical form is metallic. Cold and hard and just about the least comforting ever. I love the guy, but this just isn’t his strong suit.

[hulloitsdani]

What do u think Kiran is

How do u think the order sees kiran

*slowly sits up in my chair*

I think Kiran is a very normal person. This is someone you and I have met before. Be that from the other side of grocery store cashier, waiting in the same elevator, or walking by on a crosswalk. Kiran is a civilian from our world trying to roll with the punches of being warped somewhere completely alien. And you can see it in how they conduct themselves.

I always have a lot of fun writing Kiran’s dialogue because their casual modern speech almost feels like a dialect in comparison to the more formal fantasy tone everyone else speaks with. An “ain’t” will never exit Alfonse’s mouth, you know? And there’s a difference in “Do you have gold?” vs “You got gold?” To me, this gives Kiran an air of unfamiliarity to anyone they interact with. Let’s use Grima as an example, because it doesn’t sound like this grammatical change would make much of difference until Kiran has the audacity to hit Grima with a bro mid sentence. But that’s just how they talk. And as sweet and friendly as they are, there’s always moments like that to remind that no one has the cultural context to fully understand Kiran. Except for the audience, who can realize that Kiran let the customer service voice drop to talk to Grima like he’s an actual person.

And that’s just about how they talk! This view is only emphasized by every other thing about them! They’re a lovable goof, which is normal chill person behavior in the audience’s eyes but feels REALLY ODD to the characters of FE’s medieval fantasy war setting. There is this air of unknown about them that the more socially perceptive will pick up on and will try to come to a conclusion about. Example, I imagine Soren would interpret a lot of this as a dangerous and deeply annoying lack of intelligence from someone he has the displeasure of sharing a tactics table with. Or looping back to the Grima example, he would totally think Kiran has greedy ulterior motives behind that pleasant facade. It takes a lot of work for those types to realize that the discrepancy present isn’t really any of those things. But I also wouldn’t be too surprised if Kiran doesn’t try to directly prove any of those assumptions wrong unless they have to.

Why? Well now it’s time for the implications! Oh how we love the implications.

Because the Summoner is a different story. No one has any fucking clue what that is.

I can tell you what Kiran has pieced together so far. Summoning people from across time and space is apparently not easy. It’s not some school of magical study that some mage could pull off with enough time and research. Trust, Eitri tried. It’s a lot of complex moving parts. For example, the contracts. The contracts Kiran automatically binds their summoned to don’t even compare to the ones Veronica used in book 1. They are far more intense and infinitely harder to break. The only way out of them is if Kiran wills it so. Not even death is an option, because Kiran can come in for the revive. If they had to guess, it’s an older, more completed version of the art. Something lost to time. But no matter the case, Kiran has the ability to take full control of whoever they manage to summon. From a lowly farmer to the divine. And their power only grows.

In a similar vein, if there was any character to canonically see the hud, I think it would be Kiran. It’s genuinely part of their power set. I have previously described Kiran as the party mage until Veronica shows up to be the actual mage, but it would be way more accurate to call them a mystic/seer. They see the map, everyone’s stats, and is doing a fast amount of math to give the combat forecast. Then, upon processing all this information their enemies couldn’t dream of having at their disposal, Kiran can telepathically communicate any change in plans to anyone under contract. Kiran is not inherently some great tactician the moment they touch ground in Askr; they simply can do things no one else can. They’re learning the actual tactics part on the fly. This makes them simultaneously the largest ace up the Order’s sleeve and potentially its biggest liability. If they fall, it could cause a whole system cascade. By that same token, some of the biggest threats the Order has faced are the ones who do their research and rightfully target Kiran.

Now. Thinking critically about all that. That’s downright terrifying. A ridiculous amount of power has been dropped callously into Kiran’s lap and they have to work extremely hard to be moral with it. It’s terrifyingly easy not to be. It would actively take less effort to ‘take the reins’ as it were. But in order to be able to sleep at night ever again, they go the extra mile to not invalidate the will of their summoned. To take over like that. To make a colony of worker bees out of people. Because oh dear god they just summoned a child and the fact that they could easily force them to fight and die for them, only to be revived and do it all over again, is HAUNTING. No. No the Order has an in house orphanage now. This kid is getting adopted and cared for god damnit or Kiran might just pop a blood vessel. And sure that child is going to be a child and there will never be a world where they get along with everyone else, but that’s just going to need be a problem they address when they get there and not an excuse to use Hubris; the power set. Now replace the word child with everyone they ever summoned and you have the wider philosophy they apply to the entire Order.

They’re hyper aware of the power imbalance. They hate it with every bone in their body. They work really hard to correct it in whatever way they can.

So Kiran might not jump on the opportunity to correct those who think lesser of them. It’s… oddly comforting to know someone is keeping a critical eye on them. Holding them accountable. Especially since so much of the order just thinks of them as this quirky yet well meaning host. And, really, what can they even do about that? They have gone over the contract with every hero they summon and despite that they still choose to stay. So, what, do they try to inspire more mistrust? The problem with that they would have to actually do acts that intentionally inspire mistrust. And even if that was successful they can’t just waste the extra man power because every other month there’s some new divine asshole who wants them all dead. And if they fail that means they have to start their life from square one and god they can’t do that again so—

Just breathe Kiran.

It’s fine. You’re fine. Just breathe.

You have work to do.

[creedslove]

BETRAYED - PART SIX

Pedro Pascal x f!reader

Summary: Pedro invites you to be his plus one for the night but his attention is caught by another woman and leaves you with a broken heart

Warnings: angst, age gap, established friendship, unrequited love/one sided feelings, fluff, glimpse of Pedro being a great (silly) dad, and more angst of course

A/N: I have no idea how you guys are gonna react. I hope you guys like it, because I was very invested and loved writing every single part of this chapter. Don't forget that all ideas and suggestions are more than welcome ❤️

I still can't manually tag people on the works because I use the app and it won't let me do it, that's why I don't have a tag list at all! 

3k words

PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE | PART FOUR | PART FIVE

"You did WHAT?" Kate raised her voice without really meaning to, at the shocking news you'd told her. She couldn't believe just a few feet away from where everyone stood, hidden by a couple of trees Pedro had declared his love for you and kissed you.

And the most shocking to her: you had told him to walk away. She was shocked and expressive at first and then she went silent as you finished your account of what had happened. You told her about Pedro's apologies, about how he confessed his feelings and kissed you. And above all, how it took every ounce of strength and self-control to break that kiss.

"And then, what happened next?" She asked with fire in her eyes, anticipation making her anxious and excited to know, which caused you to roll your eyes

"What do you think happened, Kate? You think we just had a quickie in the middle of the bushes?" You groaned and sighed "he walked away, he came back inside, probably went home, I don't know, I came straight to the kitchen to help you" you shrugged. Your heart was still pounding and it felt like it would burst out of your chest at any moment. But that was not the only thing Pedro messed up in your body, you hated yourself to know your lower belly burned in need at the mere memory of his touch, of how warm his body was against yours, how his lips fell perfectly against yours. You hated the fact your arousal pooled in your underwear, every step you took you could feel it and it was a reminder of how he still had power over you, like no other man ever had and you doubted any other man ever would.

Pedro, on the other hand, should've been home at least an hour prior. He was so ashamed of himself for locking himself in the bathroom after what happened, he felt as if he was back in junior high, hiding away after being dumped by the girl he liked.

He stared into his own eyes in the mirror and sighed again, he just couldn't wrap his head around the fact you didn't love him anymore. Maybe you still did, he wasn't sure, but he'd screwed things up so bad you just wouldn't take the chance. And worse, you didn't even believe him. He never thought any of that could happen. He felt so disappointed in himself and didn't understand why he couldn't have been a better man to you, if he had, maybe right now you'd be together. It was no use wondering things now, he knew he'd lost you and he had nothing else to do there, he only wanted to get a glass of water and get the fuck out of that place. He walked silently through the hallway feeling so thankful to see the guests had already left and he didn't have to socialize with anyone, his social battery was drained at that point and he didn't have to pretend to be happy at all.

"But did you even tell him you were dating?" Kate's voice came from the kitchen, making Pedro stop dead in his tracks. He took a deep breath, his gut churning really hoping it would be someone else to reply to the question but you.

"When was I supposed to tell him? When he got his tongue down my throat?" You replied with a hint of annoyance as Kate seemed to be carrying out an interview with you, while you were tired and emotionally exhausted and all you wanted to do was go home.

"Plus, I'm not dating anyone, I'm just seeing Liev, it's not serious, just a few dates here and there…"

"And some fucking too, Y/N, or you really think I haven't noticed how you and him simply disappeared in the middle of dinner the other night and returned to the table all flushed and giggly?" She raised her eyebrow in a playfully way and saw how you blushed

"Kate!!!" You censored her "that's embarrassing, yeah, it happened a few times, so what? I'm single, he is single, or do you really think Pedro doesn't sleep around? I mean, he did when we were friends and close all the time, even if he knew it hurt my feelings, would he stop it now?" You asked "besides, I don't really buy this sudden gust of feelings he's got for me, I mean, the apologies were really important and I felt they were honest, and I really appreciate that, but don't you think it's too much of a coincidence that he suddenly discovers he loves me right when I'm about to walk out his life? You know he loves being loved. There's nothing wrong with that, we all want affection and love, but not when it comes at the cost of someone's happiness" you shrugged and got ready to leave.

Pedro was speechless and unable to move as too much bombarded him at the same time. First of all, you were dating? He couldn't believe his ears at first and it didn't make it any easier when you explained to Kate you weren't dating, you were just fucking the guy. If anything, it made it all worse. He couldn't believe that damn ape got to have access to your gorgeous body, a body that should be his, touched, kissed and worshiped by him and no one but him.

But the moment he heard your suspicions on his feelings, he felt like disappearing. He couldn't even describe how painful it felt, the pang in his chest was intense and he couldn't help but feel his eyes filled with tears. He didn't care if he looked pathetic, childish even, he was broken-hearted and done with that situation.

"Fuck this" he mumbled under his breath and finally exited the house, he was definitely getting you out of his mind.

•••

You hadn't seen Pedro many times after Flora's party. There had been other dinner parties you attended and some you even took Liev along with you, but Pedro was never present. He always came up with excuses saying he was busy doing photoshoots, studying his script or he was just out of town, little did everyone know, he felt left out and offended to know he hadn't been invited to the gatherings right after you two had fallen out. He didn't want to take out on any of your mutual friends, but it did seem to him it was pretty clear they preferred you over him. Not to mention no one wanted to have a simple friend get together turned into an awkward show by you and your boyfriend and Pedro there, lingering and watching you from afar.

But sometimes you two ran into each other at the gym. He usually kept to himself, always greeting you and asking how you were doing, but as soon as he saw Liev approaching, he'd put on his headphones, turn his back to both of you and focus on his training. He hated every single minute of those gym sessions, they were torture, he hated seeing you with that man, and no matter how much he tried not looking at the two of you, he couldn't help doing it. It was like a morbid curiosity that struck him every time and ripped his chest open. So he just decided to change schedules and avoid that sight once for all.

After his training he just shyly waved goodbye to you and headed home, he stepped into the shower in order to clear his mind, hoping he would forget about you and the unresolved feelings that haunted him. Every time he felt his heart ache, he thought of how much you suffered because of him and had to admit to himself that yeah, maybe he did deserve what he was going through. It pained him to think of everything he made you go through, but now you were happy, and as much as he tried being happy for you, he couldn't. It hurt him, but he was an actor after all and he would have no problem pretending for you. If you let him in, he would put on a happy face and support you as much as you helped him.

He got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist, walking to the closet and finding something fresh to wear. Pedro knelt down to look for his pair of sneakers when he came across a box. He frowned softly as he didn't recognize it at first, it took him some time to finally acknowledge the object. It was the box you had handed him his birthday present. You'd always been really good at giving presents and the last birthday you spent together wasn't anything different.

He opened the box and smiled sadly, it somehow still held your perfume inside, making his heart flutter in his chest. He chuckled at the happy memory and frowned as he spotted something under the bow. He hadn't seen that when he got it nor the months that followed it, but now it had caught his attention and he was curious to find what the heck that was. He pulled it carefully, seeing it was a small card and thought maybe it was just something extra that came in with the box and you hadn't noticed it as well.

He still opened and held his breath at the words he found beautifully written. That handwriting he would recognize anywhere.

"I was wondering how long it would take you to find this card… I'm not that great with words, but here it is:

Feliz cumple mi amor. Te deseo toda la felicidad del mundo y quiero que sepas que siempre estaré a tú lado. ¡Te quiero hoy y siempre! **

- Y/N"

Pedro had lost track of how many times he'd read that message over and over, but by the time he was able to put it down, he had made up his mind: he wasn't going to let you go that easily.

•••

You were almost finished preparing dinner, placing the last potatoes in the baking pan and waiting for the oven to reach the right temperature when you heard the doorbell ring. You frowned and checked the clock, it was still early for Liev to show up, so you sighed, feeling a little annoyed at the uninvited guest. You went silent once you opened the door and saw Pedro standing there, he didn't say anything at first either, just scanned you with soft eyes, admiring you, taking in every single beautiful feature he came to love over time.

"Hey mariposa, can we talk?" He asked in his sweet voice, wanting to come inside desperately, you noticed his hands fidgeted with something nervously.

"Sure, Pedro. Come in, let's go to the kitchen, I'm cooking and can't leave stuff unattended" you said giving him space to walk in and saw him following you, you had no idea what that visit was about.

You asked him to make himself at home, offering him something to drink which he politely declined, and observed you put the baking pan into the oven. Only then, he realized how much he missed your cook, how you'd spend the weekends at his home, baking all the things you enjoyed eating, and he would always end up with the dishes as he was not skilled with his cooking at all.

"Listen, princesa, I came here because we need to talk…"

"Pedro please, don't call me that…" you said in a low voice and bit your lips, finally turning to him. You saw him frown and shake his head softly.

"Call you what, hermosa?" He questioned you, seeing a soft flush spreading across your face.

"Calling me those pet names, Pedro… I know I used to like them, but it's not appropriate anymore, I mean, we're not that close and-"

You were interrupted by his hands gripping your hips, squeezing them gently and gluing his body to yours, your faces inches away from each other's, he closed his eyes, leaning towards you, his short beard scratching against your chin, your skin so sensitive to his touch, it sent goosebumps all over it.

"So you don't wanna be my mariposa anymore? You're not mi cariño? Mi hermosa, mi muñequita, mi amor?" He asked in a whisper against your ear. Even if you tried to break free from his touch, which you straight up didn't, it would be impossible. Your body felt on fire at that teasing, at that taunting moment, you hated how Pedro ruined you. But you also loved.

"Answer me, Y/N… I know you don't believe in me, you don't believe in my feelings for you, but guess what, I think you are a lying little shit as well" he kept the same tone, but this time it was followed by soft kisses spread all over your neck, ghosting it softly. "You are a fucking liar Y/N, because you told me you didn't love me anymore" Pedro continued, his lips on your throat, making you squirm as he added his teeth, leaving soft bites all over it, before finally getting to your lips.

He stopped and stared into your eyes, stroking your cheek gently and pecking your lips and chuckling.

"If you don't love me anymore, care to explain this?" He showed you the card you had written for his birthday, seeing your widened eyes and your disbelief. You hadn't forgotten about the card, but you just hoped really hard he would never find it.

You gasped and moved your body against his, so he would stop holding you so close, but Pedro used his weight to prevent you from escaping.

"Cat got your tongue, princesa? I guess it means you still fucking love me, don't you?" He chuckled "that means you are not only a fucking liar, but also one little stubborn muñequita, because you love me, you know I love you and you don't want to be together" he shook his head.

"Pedro, we can't, please, I already told yo-" you squealed the moment you felt his heavy hands on your ass lifting you up and placing you on the kitchen counter. He only took his time to settle you down before attacking your lips with his. The kiss was urgent and deep, his tongue brushing against yours as his hands roamed around your body, at the same time you tugged his hair, not helping yourself but moaning at how heated you were making out.

Pedro broke the kiss and smirked at you "Eres tan linda, mi amor" he whispered and stroked your cheek, sinking his hand down your lap and getting under your shirt, his thick, rough fingertips brushing softly against your skin like he'd never done it before.

"We can't…" you whimpered in need and only earned a scoff from him.

"Mi amor, mira…" he said patiently and let go of your body, though he was locked in your embrace as your legs snaked against his waist "if you want us to stop, we will, but does it really seem you do?" He tilted his head and gave you one of his sweet innocent smile, waiting for you to let go of your body, which you just didn't.

He pulled you back for another kiss, his hand tight on your hair, dragging sweet moans from your mouth. You couldn't resist any longer, you know you should, you had to, but it felt impossible to break free from his spell. You were tired of lying to yourself, you ached for Pedro and you would go all the way with him.

Suddenly the sound of a door slamming shut interrupted you both, you immediately broke the kiss and saw an enraged Liev staring at you both.

"What the fuck, Y/N?" Your boyfriend shouted in pure anger. You can see jaw tightening and the way his veins were more visible.

He took a step closer to you both "what the fuck is this piece of shit doing here? I thought you were done with him?" He yelled "I guess you couldn't keep in your panties anymore, you really got that hungry of a cunt to want two cocks at once? I didn't know you were such a filthy whore" he said taking another step closer to you.

Pedro closed his hand in a fist "shut the fuck up, don't you fucking dare talk to her like that, asshole" He immediately placed himself between you and Liev, shielding your body with his own.

"You shut up, asshole. I'll deal with this bitch first and then I'll fucking kill you!" Liev yelled and aimed his punch at you, but hitting Pedro instead, as he stood there to protect you.

You were so nervous you didn't even know what to do, you just screamed, so terrified and scared at how angry Liev punched Pedro. You had no other reaction than grab a knife nearby and point it at Liev

"G-get out Liev, get out now!!!" You threatened though your voice and your hand was shaking.

The man laughed at your attempt to scare him away, but was distracted enough to receive Pedro's punches on his face as payback for the first attack. Liev wasn't expecting and lost balance for a moment, falling down.

Pedro groaned in pain, but turned to you, taking the knife from your hand "calm down cariño, things will be fine" he said trying to soothe you as he turned to the man "get the fuck outta here and don't come back, I'll fucking kill you if you ever get anywhere near Y/N" Pedro threatened with cold anger in his eyes, anyone could see he was deadly serious, and Liev got up slowly, walking towards the door knowing if he gave in to his revenge thoughts, the cops would be on him at any minute.

He shot you one last glare "and you, little bitch, enjoy your moment with this dick, I hope he treats you like shit, exactly like a filthy whore like you deserves it"

Liev exited and left you shaking in nervousness at everything that went on. Pedro held your face gently, his own bleeding at the wounds he got. You whimpered and began crying.

"Shh it's okay cariño, I'm here for you, you're safe now" Pedro wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, only caring about your well-being and nothing else.

-----

** translation: "Happy Birthday my love. I wish you all the happiness in the world and I want you to know I'll always be by your side. I love you today and forever"

A/N: I hope you guys have enjoyed it!!! Again, I picked Liev with Liev Schreiber in mind but it was a just because situation so you guys can picture whoever you want. If you have any other ideas for the next chapters, let me know ❤️

[casscainmainly]

Have you read the recent chapter of boy wonder? I feel like it ties nicely with what you were talking about recently like robin, the mantles relationship with poc and batman

Adding your second ask here: "And also robin as being able to be a symbol for the collective and community. Sorry for being so scatter brained I sent the other ask without completing my thoughts😭 I was really interested in how you'll react to the recent chapter and hearing your thoughts on it. I'm not really good at analysis but reading yours are always fun"

I'm really happy you sent this ask because I've been meaning to read The Boy Wonder for ages and I never got around to it, so this was the push I needed!

You're spot on that so much of issue #5 connects to what I was discussing in my Duke Thomas and the Robin Mantle post. In fact, Damian giving the R symbol to the would-be robber directly parallels Duke giving the symbol to Daryl:

The Boy Wonder #5 / Batman (2011) #45

In both, they view Robin as a connection to their families and to the wider Gotham community, as the grounds for both individual and societal change. And honestly this makes sense, given that Damian is the predecessor, both chronologically and spiritually, to Duke's Robin.

Damian as a character of color is fraught with difficulty. The set-up of his story invites a dichotomy between the evil, Asian, brown-skinned Talia and Ra's, and the kind and caring White Wayne family. Morrison's demonisation of Talia is symptomatic of this issue. This is something The Boy Wonder mentions, too; Ra's is aggrieved not only at Damian betraying him, but at Damian siding with a rich White man, the opposite of every ideal he was raised with.

But in The Boy Wonder and in canon, the dichotomy is not so simple. Boy Wonder has Damian acknowledge both his 'demon' and Bat sides, with the social movement aspect coming from his mother, not from Bruce. It's also important to anti-racist readings of his character, as well as a general understanding of Damian, that he did not need to learn compassion. He already had it - one of his earliest moments in Morrison's run is feeling devastated at failing to save Sasha. People saying Dick taught Damian to feel things are missing the point: Damian already felt things, and what he learned from Dick was how to process and use those feelings.

(It's also important that Damian's first Batman was Dick, the first Robin, and retroactively the first Robin of Colour.)

Damian as a character moves from the restricting, White-centric legacy of the Batman into the freeing, colourful legacy of Robin. Another parallel to Duke and We Are Robin:

The Boy Wonder #5 / We Are Robin #1

Robin has always stood for youth, but this notion of the future starts with Damian (as Bruce's heir) and flourishes in Duke (as one of Gotham's many heirs). They are the future, which means the future is a place of colour.

One thing I liked more in Boy Wonder than We Are Robin is that Damian starts the movement, whereas WAR has... Alfred (this is a bad move for many reasons but this post is too long already). Damian credits the core moral principle - wanting to change the world in a communal way - to Ra's and Talia, which shows that Damian's morals do not come from the Batfam. Once again, the Robin mantle is not only a connection to the Bat, but a connection to the wearer's original/other family, as it was for Dick and Duke.

In all three cases, the other family is a family of colour. This is why I think Dick works better when his Romani heritage is acknowledged; the Dick-Damian-Duke lineage is a nuanced exploration of the ways kids of Colour navigate the White world, in which Robin functions as a celebration of difference and a rebellion against assimilation. It's a progressive journey: Dick is White-passing and has mostly lost touch with his roots, Damian (ideally, when Talia is written right) equally loves both sides of his family, and Duke is unapologetically, unequivocally Black.

Which is why, though I enjoyed Boy Wonder overall, I'm extremely puzzled why Duke wasn't in it. Like, Damian just started We Are Robin!!! Why would you do WAR and not include WAR characters? Merle could've easily been Duke, and the comic would've been richer for it. (Also why is Babs here?? She says like two lines and is not part of the Robin legacy. Steph being Batgirl or Robin would've made more sense).

I can kind of understand Duke's omission (though this comic pulls so much from We Are Robin it feels like it owes Duke a cameo), but Dick's role was strangely small. It seems like Damian didn't start as Dick's Robin here, but that point is so essential to his character that once again I'm puzzled. There is so much more to be done with Dick, especially with the last issue being a meditation on the Robin legacy.

But it was still a fun read, and Damian is so adorable throughout I can't be mad at it. I hope this post makes up for how long it took me to get to this ask!!

[pacifymebby]

You’re imagines are so good! Love the character accuracy. Imagine the peaky blinders boys having a s/o who is super into self care, and wants to pamper them as well. Like skin care, body/scalp massages, baths, etc.

This is so cute i love it, i did it as kind of modern au centered because i feel like self care is probably way more varied now than it used to be?

Tommy

🌿I feel like he looks after himself and isn't going to be as opposed to this as you might expect a bloody-minded toxic masculinity gangster to be.

🌿Especially not the candlelit baths, the back rubs and anything else which involves close physical contact with you...

🌿Both 20s Tommy and Modern! Tommy are very serious men, their brain is always set in overdrive, his thoughts buzzing and whirring like a broken machine at all hours. He never switches off and you worry about him.

🌿"Ain't good for you Tommy, you're always lost inside your own head... Driving yourself crazy, you need to switch off every now and then... Let me help you..."

🌿 You know exactly the tone to take to get him to leave his work and come to you, oh so slightly suggestive, tempting... And when it comes to you Tommy doesnt have much resistance...

🌿You probably have a really fancy bathroom with a sunken in tub, jacuzzi jets and all, which Tommy had built for you but which you always intended on sharing with him. I'm picturing this but with more house plants, more candles...

🌿 You put his favourite record on and soak in the tub with him, he holds you in his lap, definitely tries to take the vibe somewhere else

🌿But you are determined that this is going to be more than just a steamy afternoon of shower sex... You promised to help him relax and you're going to.

🌿 "Oh angel no... I don't need that..." he says when you present him with a facemask, its a sheet mask and he just looks at you all "we look like something out of a horror movie y/n" "yes but its going to make your skin feel heavenly..." "already heavenly love..." he smirks making you smile a little embarassed. "Well yeah, I mean you are..." you start but he just shakes his head, "was talking about you angel..."

🌿Tommys been through a lot and has a lot of pent up stress stored in his muscles, he doesn't realise quite how much trauma he's holding in his body until he starts to relax, and when he realises everything he's carrying with me, all these emotions he shuts out to survive, he panics a bit... He can't let himself unwind completely or he's sure he'll fall apart.

🌿So he tries to make up excuses to cut short your pamper session, standing up to get out of the bath, taking his face mask off with some excuse about having an important call that needs to be made...

🌿You're not stupid though, you know what he's doing and so with one puppy dog eye look at him, you beg him to stay just a little longer. And he can't say no to you when you look at him like that so he returns to you.

🌿You wash his hair and massage his head, you tell him to close his eyes and you treat him so delicately. He's never felt this kind of care before, this good goosebump feeling, the hairs on his neck standing on end at the slightest touch from you. He loves it.

🌿You give him a little face massage too, telling him to close his eyes, sitting in his lap and very gently, delicately massaging his temples, his cheeks and jaw. He didn't even know you could carry tension in your face like that but your touch is magic. And when you finsih it with a kiss pressed to his lips he pulls you in for a deeper one.

🌿 Tommy also likes to live the life of luxury, he always aspired to reach the levels of those higher social classes, he always wanted what they have and so when you beg him to go on a spa week with you he obliges. Its one of those things the rich do after all.

🌿He gets a taste for massages and takes you on many spa weekends. If he has a particularly troubling problem he needs to mull over he will often lie on his back in the sauna and think things through.

🌿Loves an ice bath/plunge pool because he's a fucking sociopath.

Alfie

🐻 Alfie has never had someone try to take care of him like this, he's not really used to having people take care of him at all but this is even more unfamiliar... As far as Alfie is concerned "self-care" is just "womans stuff ain't it"

🐻 "Well no Alf its not really, anyone can do it and well yknow... Youre always spoilin me aren't you," "rotten zieskiet, absolutely rotten," "well yeah, exactly... I wanna make it up to you, wanna look after you for once..."

🐻 He will argue, "But you see my little zieskiet thats just not how this works yeah, you and me yeah... You're my little girl ain't you," "yeah but..." "right, exactly right, you're my little girl and there ain't no buts about it zieskiet, I take care of you.. You don't want for anythin... You don't need to look after me, I do that myself right..."

🐻 "But Alfie," you whine fixing him with a pout and the most irresistible puppy eyes, "I want to look after you..."

🐻 So he lets you do it to make you happy... Of course he grumbles about it anyway, even if he's enjoying it. He can't drop his grumpy old man act now...

🐻 He lets you run him a hot bath, let's you use your essential oils, lets you wash his hair and condition his beard... On the condition that whilst you wash him you sing for him, something nice and sweet and low. When you're singing for him thats when he really lets himself relax, closing his eyes and feeling the heat from the water soak into him.

🐻He finds that he's able to relax and enjoy it but he can't actually admit to that, he rolls his eyes, tells you he's only doing it so that you'll stop hastling him about it, only doing it because it makes you happy...

🐻 But he secretly loves when you climb into the bath with him and massage his sore muscles, he loves feeling you comb your fingers through his beard and his hair.

🐻 Will not let you put a facemask on him, uses his beard as an excuse, also tells you he's got really senstive skin which is definitely another excuse... Five minutes ago he was pretending he didn't know what a skincare routine was, so how on earth he'd know whether he had sensitive skin or not you don't know...

🐻 You definitely teach this man the power and divine pleasure that is ✨moisturising✨ he gets dry skin and it gets worse when he's stressed so you teach him all about how to wash his face and how to moisturise properly, you make him promise he'll follow his routine every day, "happy skin means happy everything else..." you tell him and he just rolls his eyes and chunters away.

🐻 He will always insist you join him in the bath, he'll tell you he can't possibly relax if his little zieskiet isn't close by.

🐻 I feel like a lot of your self care tricks would be really good for his sciatica as well, relaxing when thats playing up, letting you take care of him. It's what he needs but it all has to be done under the pretence that its to make you happy and that hes the one looking after you.

🐻 At first he is definitely a little wary of letting you see him naked in a non sexual way, in a way where he is the vulnerable one and you're really paying attention to him... When you're not having sex being naked together makes him a little self concious, he thinks a massage will draw attention to his injuries ans scars, is worried you'll see him for the broken/breaking down man he really is

🐻 You tracing the ridges and lines of his scars, kissing them lightly when you're massaging him. Nuzzling into his neck and kissing him as your fingers trail the marbled scarring on his waist and his shoulder.

🐻 Theres one element of self care that Alfie really can get behind and thats meditation. He really enjoys sitting peacefully, letting his mind calm and settle, letting his thoughts wash over and away one by one. He believes it enhances his intelligence and insight, believes that by calming his mind he's making himself sharper.

🐻 He loves a hot stone bed more than he cares to admit but when his back is playing up lying on one of those feeling the heat relax his body slowly, its so soothing... He'll never go to a spa alone however, he always takes you as an excuse to be there.

Arthur

🍂 "You fuckin what? You're gonna make me feel better with some nice smells?"

🍂 Will not let you put "mud" on his face. "Darlin that's just fuckin wrong int it... Fuckin mud on your face? Like mud... From the ground..."

🍂 Arthur is completely baffled by the whole thing and honestly a little bit scared. It all just sounds like "girl stuff" stuff that his mates would take the everloving piss out of him if he admitted to trying it.

🍂 But you know Arthur, he might have that tough guy exterior, might come across as harsh and angry and well, rough... But underneath it he's hiding a delicate side, a side that you know would benefit from just a little self care.

🍂 You have to trick him into it, set some kind of trap because he won't conciously go near anything ylang ylang scented.

🍂 Is genuinely petrified of the shop Lush, crosses the street so he doesn't even have to walk past the front door. He's scared one of the shop assistants will lure him in with a polite hello and then drag him inside kicking and screaming, smothering him in all sorts of oils and bath shite. Once when you were just dropping in to buy a facemask he caught your hand and very very seriously told you to "be careful in there love, don't let anyone grab you" he even shuddered/had a nervous twitch as he watched you go in.

🍂 He doesn't know how to be taken care of, as the eldest son its always been his responsibility to take care of everyone else, he hasn't really been shown much love or care from many people. Most people are terrified of him, his brother who he should be closest to doesn't let him talk about feelings, and he's too embarassed about admiting "failure" to go to his aunt or anyone else for comfort.

🍂 From the first time you spoke to him you've been determined to show him that care. You looked at him, his nervous eyes, that lack of self confidence he was doing so well to hide, and you just thought "this is a man who needs a hot bath and a really good head massage"

🍂 But Arthur is so awkward and standoffish whenever you try to look after him. He hates it if you're "soft" on him because he thinks its imasculating and patronising. He finds it all so embarrassing and he'll go the most adorable shade of bright red whenever you so much as kiss his cheek.

🍂 The first time you suggest a nice candlelit bath he gets interested but thats because baths are literally just for fucking as far as he's concerned and he's dissapointed to realise that you have something else in mind.

🍂 Lots of protests, "y/n come on now we don't have to do this... This is just... I don't need to relax i am relaxed..." "Arthur you haven't been relaxed since your umbilical cord got cut..."

🍂 But once you're alone together in that bath he finally begins to relax. You tell him to close his eyes and at first he refuses or asks why. "Cause its better for relaxing..." "You're gonna do somet to me aren't you... Gonna use one of them fuckin mud potions..." "Promise I'm not..." you try to take his anxiety seriously but "mud potions" is a difficult thing not to laugh at.

🍂 He does his best to relax though and grows to love the feeling of your fingers in his hair, it really does feel like a weight being lifted.

🍂 His favourite thing is to close his eyes and lie back against your chest, the skin on skin contact, the steam and warm water doing wonders to slow his racing mind right down.

🍂 You give him hand massages a lot and he really likes learning how to give them to you too. You teach him where your pressure points are and he concentrates really hard on learning exactly how to take care of you too.

🍂 And sometimes when you're in the bath together you let your hand travel a little lower than usual, you let his idea of bath time win out.

🍂 You take him to a spa and he's so unnerved, he's worried he'll be recognised by someone and his reputation of being a ferocious gangster will be ruined. But he does like the sauna, trouble is it puts him in the mood for fucking...

🍂 Doesnt like a steam room, he feels too vulnerable in there because its dark and steamy and he gets claustrophobic not being able to see so well. If you go into the steam room he will stand guard outside so that nothing bad can happen to you in there.

🍂 You teach him lots of different breathing exercises and try to get him into stretching. They're such effective ways of relieveing tension and you know they'd do him the world of good. But he's not very flexible and he just grumbles. He is however astounded by how bendy you are and will often ask you to show him certain poses just so he can get a good look at you.

🍂 He does try to remember the breathing exercises and they do actually really help him with his ptsd.

John

🌼 I feel like John would be down for doing facemasks with you, you painting his face with some ugly green clay mask, him painting yours with a glittery gold one, taking silly selfies with you.

🌼 He definitely strikes me as a "splashes face with cold water and dries it on an old tshirt" kind of skin care routine boy but you're determined to change his primitive ways.

🌼 He also definitely loves a spa day and you two frequently dissappear to some fancy spa retreat for the weekend.

🌼 Loves a steam room/sauna combination, especially when you join him, theres something really sexy about watching you lie on your back in a bikini, lit up by the dim orange glow of the sauna. That musky essential oils smell lingering in the air... The little beads of sweat on your breasts as your chest rises and falls... "Lie down John, stop starring at me you're supposed to be relaxing..." "Oh I'm relaxed flower don't worry about me..."

🌼 Loves a massage, especially when you go all professional on him with the essential oils. When you get him to lie face down on the bed and climb on top of him to massage his back. Feeling your hands all over him, feeling your legs straddling him...

🌼 You know what else is a good stress reliever love? An orgasm.

🌼 You put cucumber on his eyes when he's in the bath and he immediately thanks you for the snack and eats it. You're speechless, how do you even begin to tell him thats not what thats for.

Bonnie

🍀 Perfectly happy to be silly with you and will let you do whatever you want to him if it makes you happy... So he lets you work out his skin type and prepare the perfect face mask...

🍀 Actually sometimes he'll acompany you out into the forest to find the berries and plants you need to make your little self care rememdies with, its a good excuse to spend time with you and he finds it incredible how knowledgeable about plants and herbs you are...

🍀Does point out that this facemask you've mixed up for yourself is just a really fancy overnight oats recipe... Does eat a spoonful and imediately regrets it wincing and spitting it out.

🍀 It does take quite a lot to convince him that self-care isn't the same as make up and stuff, he's always telling you not to "buy into all that wellness shite" because its just a new capitalist method of getting your money off you...

🍀 And you know, he's not completely wrong, but self care isn't just about buying stuff and you have to try and teach him that before he'll really let you show him stuff. Showing him how you make natural face masks, moisturisers and bath salts does help this process.

🍀 He has to take care of his body for his boxing and he's no stranger to a sports massage, actually more often than not he's the one trying to get you to let him give you a back rub... Whenever you offer he always starts on you, squeezing your shoulders, telling you you seem tense. He's such a smooth talker you don't even realise he's derailed your plan until he's smoothing warm lavender oil over your back, working your muscles skillfully. And when you do realise you don't want to ask him to stop.

🍀 After his fights you want to take good care of him and you always insist he spends the following day with you, relaxing... You spoil him with a hot bath to sooth his sore muscles, scented candles and nature sounds asmr music, massages, he even lets you put a hair mask in his curls.

🍀He's always been torn about things like spa days, hes always thought they were something for posh people, wives of men who play too much golf... But again, he'll do anything if you ask him enough times, so he comes with you one day and he's adorably awkward and hesitant about everything.

🍀 You pick his treatments for him and he really really has to trust you because he's not sure what an "all over body sugar scrub" is but it sounds, intimidating? Afterwards when you ask for his review he just grins, "I'd have liked it more if it was you in there with me..."

🍀 Ultimately though Bonnie's idea of self care is a day in the woods, or by a river with you. Somewhere peaceful, quiet. Lying back against a tree trunk with you in his arms.

🍀 "Really dove, takin care of my girls what makes me feel good, enough with your scented candles now eh, let me look after you, it's not like i ain't good at it..." he says whispering the last sentence in your ear, kissing your neck as he starts to massage your shoulders.

🍀 You're literally never winning this battle sorry.

Isaiah

🐀 Will roll his eyes when you suggest a self care night, calls it your "hippy dippy bullshit" teases you and asks if you're going to do his birth chart whilst you're at it... "Maybe I should Si, might find out why you're such a snide git eh?" You'll probably regret flashing him that cheeky smile.

🐀So aye, he's not exactly easy to convince, he has the same opinion on self care as most the other men... That its girls stuff, that it ain't manly to smell like lavender and camomile.

🐀But, a little wine, a few candles and a hot bath... You with your legs wrapped around his waist, your fingers massaging his scalp gently... Whats not to like about that... He really likes how close it makes you feel, the connection between you strengthening.

🐀Thats more to do with the fact he's being vulnerable with you and his vulnerability is being met with care and love, rather than down to the fact you've sugar scrub massaged his back and legs.

🐀He will let you do facemasks with him but it will come accompanied by many threats, "you tell anyone about this mousy and I promise you you'll regret it..." but you're not scared of him and so you tease him with the threat of telling his touch guy gangster friends all the time. You start getting your own way much more often.

🐀I think he probably enjoys the tension of letting you shave him with an open razor blade, i don't know if this counts as self care so much as just a personal hygiene thing but either way, its a very intense and intimate experience and you're the only person he trusts to do it because you're so gentle and delicate with it that you never cut him.

🐀He fancies himself a social climber and enjoys the status of being able to "treat his girl to a relaxing weekend away" he definitely enjoys taking you to spas and baths, but he tends to let you go off for all the fancy treatments and just enjoys swimming in the pool and relaxing on the stone beds or in the sauna.

🐀Another man who needs to be taught about the power of moisturising. His skin gets dry and you buy him moisturisers and give him little face massages. He's much better at remembering to do his little skincare routine than alfie is because he cares a lot about the way he looks.

🐀"Fuckin drop it with the meditation shit love, i go to church I say my prayers, I don't need to do deep breathing to cleanse my soul..." he just won't do it, won't try your stretches either because "I go to the gym don't I, yogas for girls love..."

🐀Pulls stupid faces at you when you put cucumber on his eyes.

Michael

☘️Out of all the men he takes care of himself the best. He already has a skincare routine, has several serums he uses too.

☘️ So it doesn't take much to convince him of other self care activities. However, don't you dare call it self care. "Look I'm all for lookin after meself like i just don't see why we've got to give it some soft girly name now..."

☘️ He really loves being pampered, kind of likes being treated like a king... His cousins take the piss out of him for it but he doesn't care... "Don't really see whats embarrassing about having my girl massage me back after work... Don't it make me more of a man that I've got a woman who's obsessed with me..." you never let it slide when he talks about you like that but you also know why he's doing it. He's just trying to get his cousins off his back.

☘️ Would probably spend every weekend at the spa if he thought he could get away with it. He likes to throw his cash around and receive special treatment.

☘️ He really really loves a salt scrub and he's a secret fan of a facial too.

☘️He's never the one to suggest that the two of you have a self-care evening together but you can always tell when he needs one and he never refuses your offer.

☘️You have a mini spa built into your house, a sauna and a hot tub, sometimes when you're having once of your self care nights you find yourself next to him in the hot tub, your mood changing.. Your mind drifting to other things, but when Michael is relaxing he's relaxing and theres no disturbing him.

☘️"Not now love eh, later maybe..." his little spa is sacred to him. You're astounded because he must be the first man to turn down the offer of a hot tub fuck.

[mellowluka]

I’ve been having some Thoughts™️ on the F1 related situations on social media and whatever lately, and I wanted to put them to paper and post for people to read if they wish. Warning, it kinda jumps around, but I have ADHD so I apologize in advance.

More assorted words below the cut.

[Disclaimer, this is not about the people who write RPF, this is about people hating on and discussing the real people, not fictional versions of them.]

Everyone is on their first year of life, which means mistakes are going to get made. [I’m not going to go into how I feel about the decisions McLaren’s been making, since that’s not the point here, nor is it relevant.]

Some of y’all are acting like you can go in there and do something different without seeing or knowing the whole picture. You haven’t sat in on a team meeting or anything like that, sit down.

Questioning people’s morals is also a really low blow, because we don’t see that much. You’re not their family or their friends, and what we see during a weekend on the track can be easily misinterpreted. It’s not always going to be true to life, especially with the high adrenaline.

While you can speculate all you want [you have free speech, after all], remember that these are real people you’re talking about, and not goddamn barbie dolls. Having free speech doesn’t give you a free pass to be a dick to people and situations you don’t truly know anything about.

As for Lando and Oscar, they’re full grown adults, and they’re completely within their rights to either be friends or not be friends. Either way, that is their choice. If they want to make being friends work while also being competitive? They’ll find a way, just like everyone else has done since the beginning of time.

They’re also completely capable of defending their own careers and decisions. In the end, they’re answering to their team and their team alone, not you. If you don’t like that, too damn bad, I’m sorry they have free will and that that offends you. [/sarcasm]

Yes, everything McLaren posts is going to inherently be positive PR. So is everything every other sports team or business posts, even outside the scope of F1. Get used to it, it’s not going to change. This also means that media in general will take opinions, snapshots, and just about everything else, out of context. Media literacy is a thing a lot of people have lost, and it shows.

To conclude, none of us as fans will ever get the full picture about things, and we’re just gonna have to deal with it. But knowing that you don’t have the full picture is the deal here. You can’t say you know it all when you don’t. Don’t claim you do, because believe me, we truly have no goddamn idea. Hating will get you nowhere, and it won’t change anything that’s actually happening in the real world.

Go touch some grass, disconnect, and chill out. The world isn’t ending.

[P.S. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk <3]

[umnitsa]

The Sailor's Knot

Summary: Thinking about what you lost throws you into a depression spiral. A handsome man brings you some help.

A/N: I had a dream and made it into a fanfic. This is written fully for myself and it's just two old people bonding over an old dog. <3 It's written from my experience with ADHD and I hope you guys enjoy it. Banner from @cafekitsune <3

Written with unholy eagerness and no proofreading!

Pairing: ADHD!Reader x Joel (Reader is also plus size, it just isn't an issue yet. Reader is about Joel's age.)

CW: Giant dog. Just that, this is very sweet and sad, in fact. Porn may come in later parts, because I enjoy it! <3

“So, what do you miss from before?”

The question took you by surprise as you raised your fork. You stopped, thinking of the zombie apocalypse, how life was and how happy you were for having reached Jackson. You shook your head, trying to avoid the bad feelings and memories from the early days of infection.

“To be honest? Dogs. Cats. Fuck, I miss house pets.” You sighed, looking at your friends. “I really enjoy the horses, but sometimes I wonder if we will ever be able to domesticate them again, I mean, the ones who were not spayed turned feral by now. And bred with wolves and wildcats.” You rambled away, and the people nodded around you. “Hell, I’d try if I ever knew how to do it. I mean, I know some about training dogs, but only the ones that are socialized from birth with humans… And cats… Damn, they chose to live with us, I never taught a cat to do one thing, just fed them and loved them.”

People nodded, smiling, and the older traded their memories with the younger as dinner continued. You felt it was a good way to keep history alive with these children. As you looked around, you tried to smile.

You missed your medicine too. It made life easier then, and it would make work damn easier now.

At least you could make yourself useful in the kitchen, and taking care of kids. You learned enough to help with the horses and the livestock, you learned to fix small things.

At least the community didn’t take your rambling as annoying. Most of them. And your distracted, wandering overactive mind, focused in all the wrong things at the wrong time, your bursts of weirdly philosophical irrelevant questions were seen as if you are a fae. An old soul. Someone disconnected from time and space, but useful and entertaining. You were a good storyteller and people enjoyed your silly performances and the comedy nights.

At least people know better than to get angry with you.

At least you found a way to survive.

You also missed books being widely available. And you missed all the stories that didn’t get to be told, drowned by natures own revenge. All the songs you didn’t get to hear, because they never existed. All the beautiful people that didn’t get to touch your heart acting, and singing, and performing.

You missed comedy. And the close proximity of a stranger in a crowded movie theater.

You missed the quiet inside your mind.

You felt two tears running through your cheeks. A hand heavily descended over your shoulder. You nodded, blindly. With a sad smile, you pat the person’s arm and stand up; you finish your food quickly, wash your plate and leave. They could take care of themselves for one day. ***

You loved Maria. And she really liked you back. She understood whenever you needed some time for yourself. She knew you would pay it back with work later.

That innocent question threw you into a wave of memories, and you had to ride your feelings by yourself. You felt glad you could.

The kids still came into your house to borrow books. With shy smiles, they quietly made their requests and politely asked how were you doing (as their parents asked them to do). You made an effort not to cry in front of them.

You were reading when you heard noise in front of your house. You opened the door, carelessly.

A man was standing in front of your house, with a giant dog in a makeshift leash.

You blinked, the surprise taking your ability to even process the moment.

“Found this fella in patrol.” The man’s voice was grave, almost a growl. “Thought you would like to meet him.”

The man was tall, his shoulders large. His hair unruly, more pepper than salt (probably looked like yours). He had round brown eyes, squashed by a frown. He had something heavy about him. An air of someone who had seen everything and the scars on his face alone are the only proof you need to believe it. You wondered how he would look laughing. His hawkish nose towered over thick, plush lips. You knew him.

Joel. He was ‘Tommy’s Brother’. And Tommy was ‘Maria’s Husband’.

The dog was immense, just like Joel. He looked like a german shepherd, with thick caramel fur blending into black, his ears floppy. You marveled looking at his massive frame, your heart tightening as you noticed a scar on his head, close to his eye, covered by the fur. The dog had the biggest, roundest dark eyes you’ve ever seen. He looked immensely dangerous, he could snap your hand off with his powerful jaws, but his eyes made him look gentle. The tip of his snout had a ring of white hair, silver peppering his snout gently. An old dog. Old like Joel, like you.

You approached, slowly, palms facing the dog, giving him time to get used to your presence. The dog leaned forward, sniffing your palms, huffing and shaking his giant head gently, floppy ears moving around his head. You kept your palm turned to the dog, who pressed his snout to your hand, watching you with his big eyes.

“He started following me out there.” Joel cocked his head. “Shared my hunt with him, and he slept around the fire. He’s well behaved. Think he lost his owner.”

“You should keep him.” You said softly, feeling into yourself to be generous. This dog was Joel’s luck and he should take him. It didn’t occur to you to ask him why he was bringing the dog, you weren’t even that close. “He’s a very handsome dangerous-looking gentleman. Like you.”

Joel blushed, a small smile on his face. He looked down and shook his head. You felt like he was saying something, you just couldn’t understand.

“I heard you the other day.” Joel held your hand and placed the leash in your hands. “I know…” Joel looked around awkwardly, like he was trying to piece a feeling into words. “I know this fella won’t fix things. I understand. But maybe he can bring our sunshine back.”

Joel nodded, looking into your eyes, and you could see his brown eyes peering into your soul, for one moment. It made you want to cry. You nodded, swallowing your feelings.

“Thank you.” You turned your eyes to the dog. He seemed to understand, sitting with his whole body pressed against your leg, up to your waist. His head heavily pressed against your hip, the dog waited patiently.

“Talked to Maria. It’s ok.” Joel cleaned his throat, clearing his voice. “You can keep him. Keep him inside, I’ll build the fence so you can have some space for him.” Joel shifted his weight from one leg to the other and got a fabric wrapped package from his pocket. He puts the package on your free hand. The dog raises his head, interested, which makes Joel chuckle. “Those are treats. He ate today, we just arrived, brought him right here.”

You nodded, smiling.

“We need to make sure he’s safe and you can help.” Joel nodded. “You can walk him in the leash, I’ve already asked Tommy to help us make a good one. Just for safety, I think he’s a good boy.”

You just watched as Joel offered his palm to the dog, then scratched behind his ear.

“He was really well behaved on the trail.” Joel said, softly, his fingers running through the dog’s fur. “I… I would like to visit. Play with him. Maybe help you. He was good company out there.”

“Of course!” You eagerly accepted, infinitely grateful for his gesture. You didn’t overthink why he brought you the dog, what did it mean that he saw your outburst. That would be for later. You just accepted, the dog’s eyes bringing you more joy than you could imagine. “You found him, you were the first friend he made around Jackson. Why shouldn’t you visit him?”

“I’ll be here in the morning. I’ll try and get him some hunt, then we can build the fence.” Joel nodded, stepping back. The dog sniffed the air, gently. Joel scratched the dog’s chin and stepped back, moving away from you.

“Thank you!” You shouted one last time, and he waved. The dog followed you inside. You locked the door, not wanting one of your frequent visitors to get scared with your new roommate, hid the treats in the cupboard, then placed a water bowl on the floor. The dog quietly watched you, sitting in the living room.

You finally sat, and the dog curled up against you, between your feet. He slept, leaving you to your tears as you caressed his scar.

[thescarlettbitch]

Worshipping Inanna / Ishtar

This is an informative post about how Inanna was worshipped, or believed to be worship, back in her time, and at the end I'll share how I worship her.

Ritual sex - her high priestess would have ritual sex (whether it was true sex or symbolic is unknown) with the new king to ensure his fortune.

Gender non-conformity - her cult was primarily composed of those outside the binary, and shows men and women adopting the opposing dialect and engaging in sex with each other.

Music and art - most of her myths are in the form of Hymns, and most of her followers were artists, musicians, or dancers. Specifically, war dances would be done in her temple.

Libations - a libation is the ritualistic act of pouring a liquid offering straight from a container onto the earth. In depictions, the person doing the offering was naked.

Unfortunately, due to the passage of time, many specific rituals have been lost. I've scoured and this is really all I can find about her ancient original worship, and a lot of it is disputed because no one knows what was a metaphorical ritual or an actual ritual.

That being said, here is how I worship her in the modern day.

Self-confidence - Inanna was not one to be meek, it is said by many experts and proven in her myths that she was headstrong and didn't care how she was perceived. To honor her, I wear whatever I want. I have a very alternative style and I used to fear people looking at me. She has helped silence my worry and in turn, helped me gain confidence.

Non-conformity - I'm nonbinary, and although my femininity is a major part of my identity, so is masculinity, and so is androgyny. Learning that she had a queer cult following was so liberating, as before learning that I felt like it was wrong of me to work with her. So every little thing I do that isn't in the social construct of the gender binary is for her.

Libations - lucky for me, this is one area of her ancient worship that can be done in a modern setting. I don't have a "proper" container, I just use a normal glass. I've done it with water, coffee, tea, lemonade, and even kool-aid.

Honey/Butter cakes - in, I believe, Inanna and The God Of Wisdom, Enki welcomes her with honey/butter cakes and alcohol. I have only made a honey cake once before and it was shit, but I plan on trying again soon to combine both into a honey bourbon cake. I know they didn't have bourbon back then, but it's a local good I can find and adds a personal touch.

Self love - my fiancé lives across an ocean, so some things we can't do together (both living with family and thin walls), so to honor and worship her, self love is a great way for those in similar situations and she enjoys it from what I've seen.

Offerings - usually dates, sometimes cherries, often lemonade or tea, and more recently honey whiskey. These offerings might not be "traditional" in style, but they work for me and her. I have a small glass from an old Costco tiramisu and an iridescent bowl I got half off at our local grocery, both have an 8pointed star on them. Usually I sit them out for days at a time, or at least over night, and then either ingest them or just toss it in the trash (any other alternative isn't doable in my current situation)

Music - I listen to a variety of music with her, songs about sex, love, anger, fighting, injustice. She loves it, and if you want more detail on this I have a post about the songs on her playlist here.

Driving with the windows down - I love driving, and I feel like doing so with the windows down is an easy multitasking way to cleanse myself and invite good vibes in. Usually I do this while playing her playlist.

Making posts - it may seem a little silly, but a way I honor her is keeping her and her family alive. They are old deities, their civilizations and worshippers lived about 6,000 years ago, and some of her family have had their names lost to time. Making posts about them helps get word out, and keep them "alive".

Digital temples - I play the sims 4 and I saw someone talk about how they wanted to make a temple to their goddess in the game, so... I'm making my own. And will probably have my sims "worship" her via a club. Some people don't see this as an act of worship, but I do. As @thrashkink-coven said in this post, the gods are as modern as they are ancient. I know she enjoys it.

I will go through and make a full post detailing specific UPGs (personal practice things not backed in historical fact) with her, for anyone interested.

[ftmtftm]

I haven't had a lot of time or space to get really into theory on this blog for a minute in between everything going on in my life offline, but let's talk about theory, Tumblr, and the transandrophobia tag.

So, first off: Theory. Theory, in this case political/queer/feminist/etc. theory, changes and builds on itself over time. As the world changes, so does theory. In my opinion, becoming outdated is something that should be a goal of progressive theory/theorists - because it means that the world has changed enough that those ideas are no longer necessary in the way they once were. They're often still important as foundations, but they leave room for expansion and growth because our ideas can and should be malleable. They should be updated and changed as the world around us updates and changes and we gain new perspectives under new cultural contexts.

Tumblr has... never been the place to discuss theory in a productive manner. Social media in general has never been the place to discuss theory in a productive manner. The unproductive nature of Tumblr specifically is largely due to our relationship to discourse and the immense normalization of cyber bullying, guilt tripping, and moral/ethical panics that we have curated here. It takes one to know one, I get it. It's something I've also taken part in, particularly when I was a teen/in my early-early 20's, and I am trying to figure out how to navigate in a more productive way now. The culture of our belothed hellsite does not really support that though. We try and fail and try and usually fail again, but it gets easier to try every time.

I think there's a lot of people who don't want to try and change that culture though. I think there's a lot of people on this site who are angry, who are traumatized, who are unhappy, etc. etc. and use the bitterness and antagonistic nature of Tumblr culture as an outlet. I think that's part of why the transandrophobia tag itself is often kind of garbage. It's why I think most tags on this website are garbage - especially after Tumblr changed the tagging system to a broken search bar. I think any kind of meaningful conversation gets lost in the weeds of a bunch of jaded, marginalized people begging to be heard while simultaneously drowning each other out from all directions.

There's a reason why I barely touch the tag anymore. It's in part because I've just been extremely burnt out - but it's also because it's just unpleasant to scroll through right now. Tumblr Culture has Tumblr Culture'd and currently, every time I take a peek at the tag I don't see a desire for the development and progress that should come with the discussion of theory.

I see a bunch of Tumblr users circlejerking it and I think most people posting capital T, capital D Tumblr Discourse™️ in the tag need to chill the fuck out. That goes for both people who deny and support transandrophobia as a theory.

Shameless "I have read a lot of theory and think it's important plug" but please, I'm begging you all, read some Black Feminist works and literally any Transfeminist work outside of The Whipping Girl. I have some resources [ here ] in my reading / watch list. It desperately needs some updating but honestly if you want that? Pay me. I'll give you my Venmo.

(For real though? Please, if you know Serano but not Bornstein or Stryker or Koyama... If you talk about Intersectionality but could not tell me who Crenshaw is............. shut up.....)

[princesscolumbia]

So I had a thought about SexPal vs. Harrow

Both Palamedes and Harrowhark are both geniuses, and even Plamedes believes that Harrow is smarter than he is, but that begs the question, then, why did Sextus figure more things out quicker than Harrow did?

Coming from an entire family of Extremely High Intelligence people (nearly everyone on my dad's side of the family is some form of supergeek with careers in engineering, bio-sciences, computing technology, and that one uncle that nobody quite knows what he does but it's government-adjacent and he's not allowed to talk about it), I think I landed on the answer; knowledge of people.

By dint of his touch-psychic ability, plus the very obviously more social nature of The Sixth House, means that Palamedes has needed, by pure necessity, to bend some of his intellect to understanding the people about whom his magic gives him the information and with whom he must interact.

By contrast, Harrow had one (1) friend/rival/sibling/classmate/conspirator/bully growing up, and then at the moment she lost her parents and gained control of all of Drearburh she locked down The Ninth House, further limiting her already limited chances to interact with people at all. Her intellect had completely unfettered freedom to pursue knowledge and research for its own sake, ignoring the human component entirely if she so chose. Even the very finite contact with the people her magic was useful for was really only good after said people were already dead, as bone magic isn't really good for much besides maybe dentistry or chiropractic work.

Coming back to my family for a hot second; that one uncle who by nature of his work means he doesn't have much contact outside his job? He's terrible at people. He genuinely doesn't get how to people whatsoever. My aunt, who's the "black sheep" of the family and went into bio-sciences (not going into a pure technology-related field? How gauche!), deals with microorganisms and, as a hobby, dabbles in food science. Both of these vocations are about people and how they interact with the world in some fashion, so my aunt is leagues better than my uncle at people-ing. If there's a sociological element to any problem the family might have, we all know to go to my aunt and never my uncle.

The reason SexPal figures out the (imperfect) Lyctorhood before Harrow, the reason he's confused by her failure to have "solved it" like he did, is because being a lyctor involves another person so intimately they might as well be an extension of your own soul. Harrow grew up being terrified of people knowing her on that level so all her intelligence inherently tries to reject any application of people-ing to any problem she's trying to solve.

[cwritesforfun]

Eddie Roundtree x Fem!Reader: Introverts & Parties Don't Mix Well

You're in the band and while you are close to all of them, you and Eddie tend to gravitate to each other.

Y/N = Your First Name & L/N = Your Last Name

Narrator = Julia Dunne (but Narrator for sake of the story)

** I do not own the DJATS characters or plot ** **** The timeline is going to seem weird lol but I'm just writing what I want to write lol ****

Masterlist

Y/N's POV

Narrator: This is just going to be your introduction. So could you tell us who you are and how you got into Daisy Jones & The Six? Y/N: Hi everyone I am Y/N L/N! I have always loved listening to music and creating music. When I was younger, I started with piano and guitar. Then in middle school, I learned flute and piccolo because I wanted to be in a concert band. I joined a band with friends outside of school in early high school and we played some small gigs in town. After high school, I moved to Los Angeles and met Karen within my first week. Her band needed an extra musician and I filled the spot. I followed Karen wherever she went, and she did the same with me. If one of us left a band then so did the other. We only joined a band if we both could. I learned sound engineering and technology to do anything a band could need. Karen took up something else. I'm feeling really tired at the moment, so I honestly can't remember. You’ll have to ask her. The Dunne Brothers played after us at this bar. We met the boys there. I wasn’t interested in being social and I left, but they liked Karen. So, we changed bands. Narrator: Were you angry that you had to leave? Y/N: No. The band we were with never liked our ideas or respected us anyway. They also wanted Karen & I to dress a certain way that we didn't want to. Karen: I just wanted to make music and I wanted to do it with Y/N. She is and was my best friend. Narrator: Did either of you ever think about splitting ways? Karen: Never. Y/N: Never. Narrator: Wow, and would you say you're both still best friends? Karen: Yes. Y/N: Yes. Narrator: We already talked about Karen joining. What about Y/N? How did you feel about her joining? Billy: We needed a keyboard player, which was Karen. Her only condition on which she would accept our offer to join the band was to let Y/N join as well. The rest of the band liked Karen and thought that it was worth it to bring in Y/N too. I'm glad we did. Y/N is and was such a kind soul. She was also very kind to Camila and you growing up, so yeah I was a fan. Warren: Y/N, yeah I found her hot. We saw her play and she rocked hardcore. She also had a cool voice, so I was on board. As soon as I saw how Eddie looked at her, I knew he was a goner. That man was lost in the world of Y/N even before we met her. Daisy: I liked her a lot. Her vocal range was amazing and I could listen to her for hours. Y/N was always kind to me. I consider her to this day one of my close friends. Graham: Y/N was cool. To be honest, I was more focused on Karen at the time, so I was all for letting Y/N join. We don't keep in touch as much as I would have liked because of well Karen. Eddie: She could sing, she knew how to work any sound technology, she could play so many instruments, and she was single. Yeah, I was interested in her as soon as we were told she could join.

Narrator: How were the early days for you? The boys talked a lot about the parties. Did you like the groupies and parties? Y/N: God, I hated the parties at first. Introverts and Parties, they don't mix well. I realized that part of being in a band is doing things they like and interacting with them in social spaces. Even if I preferred being alone in my room, I wanted to be close to the band. And, if I hadn’t been pulled out of my comfort zone at those parties, I never would’ve fallen for Eddie. Narrator: Were you always closest with Eddie? Other than Karen, that is. Y/N: Yes, I was. Graham mainly hung out with Karen and he only talked to me if it would make him look good for Karen. Obviously, I was still close to Karen. Daisy was not always in the right headspace, which made me too worried to hang out with her because I wanted her to be safe. Billy was too serious at work but he was cool at parties. Camila was kind and I would talk to her at a lot of parties. Warren was so outgoing that I was anxious being around him at parties because he would try to get me to take more shots or take drugs. He was cool during recording sessions and for work though. And as for Eddie, I knew he was talented and Billy didn’t see his full potential. I also knew that some of Eddie’s ideas were good ones if we just went through with them. He was also a really inspiring songwriter and had a sweet voice. He'd probably hate that I called it sweet, but it always felt like home to me. Eddie: Y/N was always supportive of me and my ideas. She would listen to demos of songs that I’d written and we’d write together. She was a great lyricist on top of everything else she was amazing at. She was perfect to me. Y/N: Before we started dating, Eddie and I would spend a lot of time together. Warren always joked that Eddie and I should just cut the sexual tension by having sex. He also kept telling us that we should date because we clearly both liked each other. We were both coming to terms with seriously liking each other, so we would then just make fun of Warren for getting drunk and we wouldn’t talk about it. We just agreed to move on. Well not until this one party…

Skip to the party ~

You hang with Billy, Camila, and Daisy drinking before you decide to head outside to see if it’s quieter and calmer. Billy and Daisy are tolerating each other, so you feel good leaving them with Camila.

You notice no one sitting at the table by the fire pit so you grab a new drink and sit down. A guy you’ve seen at parties before starts talking to you and sits in the chair next to you. You decide to be polite so you keep talking to him.

You feel arms wrap around your neck and can tell it’s Eddie. You know his cologne and you know his hugs. He leans down, kisses your cheek, and exclaims, “I was wondering where you were, babe. Who’s your new friend?” The guy looks between you two, gets up, and runs away. It makes you and Eddie laugh. Eddie takes the guy’s seat and says, “I saw you out here and you looked bored. I wanted to save you from that guy.” You reply, “He was being polite and he never even talked about sex. It was nice actually. But, I just wanted to be alone to drink by the fire. It was getting way too much inside the house with all those people.” Eddie replies, “Yeah, tonight's energy is not the best. And, I did get myself into a bit of a sticky situation. I need your help.” You ask, “Sure, what’s up?” He answers, “I need you to go inside with me and pretend to be my girlfriend. Some of the groupies and Warren are annoying me. I want them to leave me alone and I'll even sneak somewhere quiet with you after.” You ask, “Why me?” He answers, “Everyone thinks we’re already dating. I thought it would be the easiest option... and well they asked if you were the girlfriend and I said yes.” You nod. So it’s just out of convenience and he agreed to a lie that you wish was true. You say, “Sure boyfriend. What do I need to know before we go in?” He tells you the plan as you walk in. You know Eddie and he loves physical touch. So you give him permission to be touchy as if you were actually dating and he gets a little flustered at the idea.

Eddie’s hand finds yours as you walk. He twirls you around and you dance together. Your hands go around his neck and his go on your waist. You ask, "Ready?" He looks confused and asks, "For what?" You answer, "A kiss, babe." You then pull him closer and you kiss. You wish you could say it was a horrible kiss, but the truth is, it was the best kiss you had up to that point in your life. You felt the fireworks everyone talked about. Eddie pulls away, puts his forehead to yours, and says, "Holy wow that was a kiss... I think I need something cold." You laugh and pull him toward the fridge. You hand him a cold beer that you open by kicking it with your foot. Eddie's jaw drops and he says, "Wtf, I didn't know you could do that." You press a kiss to his lips and say, "That's good, babe. It keeps the relationship more interesting." Eddie replies, "It really does."

You hear, "Well well well... if it isn't traitors." You see Warren with hands on his tips and girls hanging all over him. You ask, "Why are we traitors?" Warren answers, "You two have been fu**ing and dating without telling me. I've wanted you two to date since you two met. I thought you two would tell me first. Eddie was in love from the first time he saw you, Y/N." Great news great news... ok self act like this is old news... You wrap an arm around Eddie and say, "I know. It's so cute how he fell for me on day one. And Warren, we've been keeping it a secret. We didn't anyone to know just yet." Eddie's arm finds your waist and he adds, "We were waiting for the right time. We didn't want to steal anyone's thunder." One of the girls asks, "You two are hot. Are you looking for a third?" You smirk and answer, "We don't like sharing." Warren lets out a laugh and says, "Staking your claim on your man, wow. Eddie, do you feel the same? You've done an orgy or two." Eddie smirks and replies, "Hearing the woman you love moan your name during an orgasm is more satisfying than being with multiple people." You feel your cheeks blush and you move a little because it is feeling a little hot in here. Warren says, "I'll leave you two to it then." He walks away with the girls.

(( PLAY THIS NOW for the full experience ))

Before you and Eddie can talk, the power goes out. You all start passing out candles and flashlights. Karen finds you, pulls you into a hug, and leads you to the piano. She starts playing and you start singing. Daisy joins you and you both twirl each other around. Eddie starts playing and his eyes meet yours. They never leave you as you sing. Daisy starts singing with Billy and you join Karen on the piano bench. Karen lets you play with her. Everyone is singing and it's magical. It feels so nice being here with friends doing what you love.

People start leaving after that and you go to your bedroom to wait for everyone to clear out. You also are trying to avoid Eddie because tonight did crazy things for your heart. You knew how much you cared about Eddie, but tonight made you fall deeper for him. It's going to be hard to keep going with hiding your feelings. Maybe you should tell him? If he says he sees you as a friend, then well... you could just quit the band. Karen should stay though. She fits in well.

You leave your room and Eddie is standing there staring at you. He exclaims, "Hey uh I need to talk to you." You reply, "Funny, I need to talk to you too." He replies, "Oh good... Can I come in?" You nod and he walks in. You ask, "So, what do you need to talk about? Does it uh... does it have to do with our little act tonight?" He answers, "Yeah it does... great job by the way. I think it really worked. You're a great actress." Actress... yeah you were acting. Your shoulders deflate and you sigh. So he must not feel the same. He asks, "What's wrong? You seem upset." You answer, "Because Eddie Roundtree, I like you. And tonight's little act wasn't acting for me! I like you a lot and I want to date you if you would like to go on a date with me." His jaw drops and he exclaims, "I really like you too. Ever since I saw you sing for the first time, I knew you were it for me." You ask, "So then kiss me like you mean it?" He smirks, pushes you onto the bed, and kisses you deeply.

Your door creaks open and Eddie stays on top of you. Warren jumps and says, "Oh sh**! I thought you two were kidding when you said you were dating. I'm backing out of this room slowly or I could stay and watch. This is kind of hot." On sync, Eddie and I scream, "LEAVE!" Warren backs out of the room and Eddie collapses next to you with laughter. He says, "You smell really good. Can I stay in your bed tonight? I want to smell like you." You answer, "You can stay here, but won't you be uncomfortable sleeping in jeans?" He smirks, "Babe if you wanted to see me naked, you could just say it." You cover your face with your hands as you blush while saying, "I just want you to be comfy. I'm going to put on different clothes. I'm not sleeping in this dress." He replies, "Well babe, you looked really hot tonight. I don't know if this dress was to get my attention, but it worked. I want you to wear this on our first date." You smile and say, "I can't wait for our first date. And, I did wear this dress for you." He smiles and you kiss again.

You change into your pajamas and Eddie asks, "Is it okay to sleep in my boxers?" You answer, "Sure." He lays down in my bed and replies, "Your room is quieter than my room. Wtf! Is this how you sleep every night? I laugh and say, "Yeah. It's because I'm next door to Karen who we all know is too down bad over Graham to properly hook up with someone so it's quiet. I also don't share a wall with Warren or Billy who are little sex demons." He laughs and replies, "You're so lucky. Don't be surprised if I start sleeping in here." You laugh and reply, "I don't mind. You can take your afternoon naps here if you want as well. I usually am on my runs or reading outside at those times." He replies, "You're making me feel so spoiled." You laugh and ask, "But you have to do one thing for me, do you promise?" He asks, "What? I'd do anything for you." You answer, "I kind of wrote this song about you and I want you to listen to it. You're always really good at helping me improve my lyrics and you give me such helpful critiques. I want to eventually release this song even if not with the band. I just really like it." He smiles and replies, "A song about me? And why would you release without the band? Oh wait Billy would probably not want it because he's not the star. True." You reply, "I don't think any one of us is the star of the band. We all have star potential and star qualities. Billy is talented, but he needs to learn to compromise. The song about you is about my crush on you."

Narrator: How was the song? Eddie: It was so cute. Y/N is an amazing singer and her lyrics had me blushing so much. Her little smile as she stared at me while singing was melting my heart. I told her to change one line because I think another word fits instead of what she wrote, but it was perfect. Teddy actually helped Y/N produce and release it, which we all supported. Y/N was staying in the band, so no one minded. Y/N: Eddie was so cute when I played it. Teddy also really liked it and said it would be a summer hit. Sure enough, it was. Narrator: How was the rest of the tour? Y/N: Insane wow! I opened our summer shows to play my single with Eddie as my lead guitarist, which was fun. We'd then run off and run back on with the rest of the band. Everyone loved my song including the rest of the band. Eddie and I had fun at every show. We spent some nights drinking out with the rest of the band. Some days I wanted to have a chill night and Eddie wanted to be wherever I was, so we would spend some time with Billy in his bus. Billy and Eddie would act civil in front of me. It was nice. We had fun... until it wasn't fun anymore. The tour ended. The band broke up. Most people wouldn't talk to each other. Narrator: What about you and Eddie? Y/N: I got my stuff from Karen's place and moved in with Eddie. We shared rent, and cooking responsibilities, and just enjoyed being together. He became a music producer and helped me produce music. I've played some small venues and started creating a fan base. It's really cool to do what you love with someone you love. Eddie: Don't tell Y/N, but I'm proposing tomorrow night.

Masterlist

[jazziwritesthings]

Missing You - Bang Chan

Purely a work of Fiction.

Word Count: 2,100

Pairings: Bang Chan x Reader

Warnings: Miscarriage mention, angsty

All dialogue is in Korean unless otherwise specified.

A/N: Recently got into Stray Kids and needed to write some Channie, there isn't nearly enough. Also, Part 2?

********

Your POV

Screaming filled your ears as you watched the boys enter the stage. Your eyes immediately searching for your ex-love. He still held your heart even though he was completely unaware. The breakup was messy. You couldn’t stand all the hate you were getting just because he chose to love you. He didn’t want that and said stuff to fans but nothing seemed to stop the damage to your mental health. It became so bad that you decided the best course of action was to leave. That was the last thing Chan or any of the guys wanted. They all loved you and loved having you around. Not only were you the love of Chan’s life, you were the boy's best friend. You became part of their small family and had a place in each of their hearts. While you weren’t able to keep in touch with Chan as it was too painful, you managed to keep in contact with a few of the guys. That’s how you were here. Hannie had texted you as soon as he found out they were performing near home. He got you VIP tickets and everything. You told him that you weren’t sure you’d be able to show up. Never fully committing until about 4 hours ago. So here you stood. All dressed up waiting to see your family. It’d been almost 3 years since you broke up with Chan, and you finally followed each other on socials again, thanks to the guys.

As the concert ended a guard came out of the back and nodded to you. Making sure you weren’t spotted had become a secret skill you developed over the years. You made your way over to him and showed him your badge to identify yourself. He slowly led you around the darkness backstage. You heard them before you saw them. All just standing around. Hannie kept looking around hopeful, he was the first to spot you. “Y/N!” Before you knew it he was running at you and lifting you off the ground in a hug. You giggled as you hugged him tightly back, “ Hi Hannie.” Before your feet touched the ground the others were surrounding you, each calling that they were next to hug you.

After hugging all of them, only one remained. He hadn’t joined the group in running over to you. Not what you had hoped. They were all talking so fast you were having issues understanding everything. Then the voice you missed so much cut through the air, “ We should get back home guys.” He wasn’t even going to attempt to say hi? Your heart plummeted. Maybe you really had lost him. Thinking that you lost him completely devastated you, before you dated he was your best friend and he was the person you thought you were going to marry. They all nodded in agreement. You nodded your head, “ Then I better get going-” You were cut off, “ No, you’re coming to hang out. We missed you too much.” Surprised you nodded, “ Alright. Just like old times. I’ll drive and park a few streets away?” Hannie smiled at you as he nodded.

Pulling into an all too familiar parking area you put your car in park and turned it off. You let out a shaky breath not sure if your heart could handle it. Shaking out of the funk you got out and started walking. Luckily their apartments were super close to each other, same floor and everything. All of a sudden standing at their doors you weren’t sure whose to knock on. You used to be able to just use your key and go into 3RACHA’S apartment. You gave the key back when you and Chan broke up. Luckily you didn’t have to make a decision. The door to 3RACHA’s apartment opened and Changbin peaked his head out, “ She’s here!” He hollered back into the apartment before reaching for your wrist and pulling you inside.

Inside the apartment all the guys sat around in the living room, relaxing onto any furniture or the floor. It brought back so many fond memories. You noticed that one was missing and a look crossed your face. The look was noticed immediately by Hyunjin, “ He’s in his room. We hadn’t told him you were going to be there.” That made you groan, “ Guys!” Seungmin put his hands up in surrender, “ Hey, don’t blame us. He told us not to talk to him about you.” Your shoulders fell as your purse hit the couch and you crossed the room to sit on the floor in front of the couch, “ What?” They all nodded, “What do you mean?”

“ He told us you were a forbidden topic if he was around.” This news made your stomach sink. So he had no idea what you were up to these days. That broke your made up world inside your head, you had always thought that he kept tabs on you like you did him, but no. He couldn’t even stand the topic of you. “You okay Noona?” Your gaze flicked over to I.N. “Yeah, fine.” You smiled at the young Maknae across from you. A hand rested on your shoulder and squeezed. You covered the hand with your own smiling back at Felix behind you on the couch.

You spent the next few hours catching up with the guys, playing games and watching movies. One by one they said their goodbyes and headed to their own rooms within the two apartments. Finally it was just you and Hannie left in the living room. “Shit, it’s like 1 am.” Hannie said all of a sudden. “Crap. I’ll head out.” He shook his head, “ No, stay here. Like old times?” You smiled at him, “ I think I’m too tired to drive anyway.” He smiled and got up and left the room. He came back with 2 pillows and 3 blankets, remembering how you like to sleep. “Thank you Hannie.” He reached down and patted your head, “ Goodnight Y/n.” You got all the pillows situated in the way you liked and quickly fell asleep sprawled out on the living room floor.

You bolted upright, chest heaving, having a hard time catching your breath. You heard fast footsteps and almost immediately a light turned on and someone was staring at you. As your eyes adjusted you realized it was Channie, staring at you in just his boxers. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you.” He ran a hand through his hair, “ You still have nightmares?” Letting out the inhale to a deep breath, “ Yeah. They never really went away.” He moved a bit closer, “ They were gone for almost a year.” You nodded, not trusting your voice. “They started again after you left?” A tear falling down your cheek. “ Yeah, uh, the memories of a miscarriage never really go away Channie” The nickname left your mouth without even thinking. He nodded the memories of the aftermath flooding his brain. You hadn’t even known you were pregnant. Then the cramps got really bad, so bad that he rushed you to the ER thinking that maybe your appendix burst or something. They did a lot, but confirmed all the symptoms were because you were having a miscarriage. That was what broke you the most. The news that you miscarried was leaked and everyone was blaming you. It broke you so much you had to leave. You had to let go of the love of your life. “Y/n?”

Hearing your name in his voice brought you back, except this time he was right in front of you holding your hand and talking, “ Breathe. In. Out.” It took you a minute to recognize that you were having a panic attack. They happen a lot these days. Seeing him in front of you made you snap back into reality. You pulled your hand from his and brought your knees to your chest. A defeated look crossed his face. He shook his head, like he was shaking away a thought. Without a word he stood up and walked back to his room, leaving the light on for you.

Chan’s POV

He was sleeping soundly when he heard such a familiar sound that brought him right out of it. He didn’t even think when he got up and ran out to find the noise. That's when he turned on the light and saw you bolt up from the floor. He heard her apologize in that angelic voice of hers. Surprised at the sound of his own voice he asked about her nightmares. They were nonexistent during their last year together. That's when he heard the word. The word that was the cause of everything he loved being taken from him, “The memories of a miscarriage never really go away Channie.” Hearing that name from her lips felt like heaven to him and he hated it. He remembered everything about that day and the weeks that followed were swallowed up with grief over something they never even got to celebrate. By the time he snapped out of the memories he could tell you were having a panic attack. Without thinking he rushed over and grabbed your hand in his. Your soft hands felt so nice against his, oh how he missed you so much. “Breath. In Out.” He found himself instructing you to breathe, must be muscle memory he thought to himself. You seemed to finally snap out of it. You pulled your hand from his and proceeded to make yourself as small as possible, but so far away from him. It felt like his heart broke all over again as you pulled away from him. He felt like he was going to cry so he stood up and walked to his room without another word.

Your POV

You never fell back to sleep after that. You stayed sitting there thinking and thinking. As daylight creeped in through the curtains you heard a familiar door squeak. A small smile graced your lips knowing they never bothered to fix Hannie’s door. “You’re up?” He said as he walked into the kitchen. You didn’t respond, only nodded. A few minutes went by before he was in front of you handing you a steaming mug of coffee. He lowered himself to sit on the floor next to you. “I had a nightmare.” You started without looking up from your mug. You could feel his eyes on you, prompting you to go on. “He came running to me.” This time you looked over to your best friend to see a look of utter surprise on his face. Hannie couldn’t tell you, but sometimes Chan would be calling for you in his sleep. Especially while on tour. But he felt like it wasn’t his place to tell you this. Shifting to face him, “I never told you what made us break up for good did I?” Hannie shook his head. Sure, the rumor of the miscarriage was heard but he knew if you were pregnant, you would have told him. He watched as you set your mug on the side table.

“I had a miscarriage.” The shock that he felt was indescribable.

“What?”

You pulled your knees to your chest before continuing. “I had a miscarriage, Hannie. We didn’t even know I was pregnant at the time. It got out and the fans, they were ruthless. I couldn’t take it and neither could he. I couldn’t stand to see how upset he was all the time. So, I thought the best thing to do was leave.” His heart broke for both of his best friends.

“Why on earth would you think that?!”

“SHH. Hannie.”

“No, why? It’s not like you stopped loving him, right?” The look in his eyes he was hurt, not only for you but for Chan and how heartbroken he was after you left.

Taking a deep breath you closed your eyes, "Sometimes it's not that you stop loving them, but you know they deserve better so you let them go. Although it was for the best it still doesn't stop the ache in your chest. I miss him Hannie, so fucking much. And seeing him again brought it all back. I don’t think I can do this.”

You didn't know it but someone else was awake and lingering in the hallway listening to your confession to Hannie. Chan held his breath. He missed you too. So much that he didn’t know what to do with himself. Knowing you still loved him gave him the motivation he needed. He knew he needed to get you back, somehow.

[bimbinis]

the trouble with critiquing transandrophobia and associated tendencies as a trans man is that what it feels like is that you’re being put in the position of arguing that you’re defending yourself from accusations of Not being privileged, that you are in fact privileged, which in a discussion that is explicitly a matter of oppression olympics is automatically a theoretical lost position. how do you even express the fact that transandrophobia is an incredibly lackluster category, that not only relies on incorrect, hurtful underlying assumptions about how the oppression of other groups work, but on top of that doesn’t even actually speak truth to your actual goddamn lived experience, when you’re the very person it purports to be about, when saying “my life does not look like this bc I’m viewed as a man by society” sounds like bragging?

and because the ghost of transmedicalism yet looms high over the land perpetually haunting us all, it very quickly gets warped by transandrophobia truthers into us saying that they’re not really trans bc they don’t take hormones or men bc they don’t pass (even though to me their tendencies towards 1. transmisogyny and 2. making those godawful, out of touch positivity posts reassuring men they’re allowed to be masculine or whatever, both tendencies I frequently observed in my circle during my time as a transmed, seem just as worthy of the accusation). meanwhile they impose on us a false ubiquitous experience of living in a world where people view us as women and measure us by the standards set for women, and any oppression we experience has nothing to do with being viewed on some level as men bc you see, cis men don’t experience oppression for being men but we very much do, we’re the specialest non-toxic boys in the world who will redeem masculinity bc we’re not actually subject to true social existence as men. if you suggest you are that’s you saying that you wanna be just like a cis man which is transphobic and misogynistic bc cis men are misogynists and trans men aren’t. so stay in your lane and let us speak about your experiences for you :)

it’s just such utterly exhausting shite. and bc these people always have these insufferably woobified personas, these performatively inoffensive, “pure cinammon roll”-esque public identities, that makes it all the more infuriating when they engage in such blatant imposition of their own outlook on other people and act like they’re not doing it. but if you call them out on it and tell them to at least have the decency to own up to it they start whining that you’re a toxic male telling them to man up. these people will say to your face that everyone in your life will always view you as a woman and there’s nothing you can do about it but if you reply with “ok aiden” or smth they’ll cry that they’re being hatecrimed. deeply unserious people