#so I try to keep them the center of it all

[k0juki]

Pleaseee…please write something with ski aggu…we’re starving vro⛩️

He is so fckng fine ❤️😏

Friends don't do that

Ski Aggu x reader

English is not my first language, so feel free to point out any mistakes or errors! Also the picture is not mine! Credit goes to owner! Not edited!

A/n: little midnight surprise 💙

Wc: 1.2k

---

Being in the same friend group with a person you absolutely adore and can't take your eyes off, is really, really hard. And it's even worse when that person is your best friend, Aggu. He is simply gorgeous.

Sometimes it was hard to watch him interact with so many women and men. They threw themselves at him, but you couldn't blame them. Who wouldn't do that?

"Are you jealous?" You asked, as the unwanted stranger left after Aggu remarked that you didn't want to grab some drinks with that guy. You were at some lame party and this guy was trying to know you a bit, but he didn't stand a chance. There was Aggu to stop that.

"What? Me? No, never." He muttered and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you more into his side. It was strange to see him like that. To keep you by his side all the time. Keeping you to himself, but you didn't mind at all. You were glad that it was you who he wanted beside him and not some random person.

"Hmm, right. So you wouldn't mind if I'll go get something to drink, right?" You knew you caught him here. Maybe he wasn't jealous, but he still didn't want you to leave him. Without other questions you stood up, but before you could go anywhere, Aggu asked you.

"Where are you going?"

"Just to the toilet, don't worry. I'm not going to that weirdo." You loved to mess with him. To rile him up a little.

"Oh, okay."

As you disappeared from their sights, Joost immediately turned to look at his friend and said.

"Man, you're smitten." Joost remarked, smirking. Seeing how his friend was acting around you.

"What are you talking about?" His red face and ears were a sign that he was lying.

Joost knew that. On the other hand, he hoped that he will make a move and told you as soon as possible. If he won't, there will always be someone who will do that.

"C'mon don't pretend, well, at least not in front of me."

Aggu sighed and rubbed his forehead with his hand, obviously in distress. He knew he couldn't keep something like that a secret. "Is it that obvious?"

"For me? Yes, it is."

"Shit."

"You gotta tell her. She won't be single forever..." Joost urged, and he was right.

"I know, but what if I'm not her type? Or she'll say something like I wanna stay friends, sorry." This sentence really scared him. He would rather be forever friends with you, then destroying something that could be one-sided.

"She won't. She's literally just as smitten as you are." Joost insisted, trying to calm him down.

But before Aggu could say something, you came back with a smile on your pretty face. You sat back down in your seat next to Aggu. He wrapped his arm back around your shoulders, as it was before.

"What were you guys talking about?" You innocently asked and looked at Aggu, then at Joost and then back at Aggu. Feeling him tense a bit, you frowned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry." He answered with a dry laugh and rubbed his hand on your shoulder in resurance.

You gave him a strange look, but didn't ask more. If he wanted to tell you something, then he would. "Okay...but why are you both acting so weird?"

"We're not." They answered at the same time. Aggu sent a warning look to Joost. Telling him to stop it, immediately.

You spent the rest of the evening in Aggu's and Joost's company. But the longer you stayed here, in the center of the party, the more you wanted to go home. It was getting too noisy and you didn't want your head hurt that much the next day.

"Are you okay?" Aggu asked, realizing how quiet you became.

"Yeah, my head just hurts a bit from that loud music."

"Do you wanna go home?"

You just nodded your head yes. Feeling tired all of sudden.

Aggu didn't need to be told twice. You and him said your goodbyes to Joost and left.

You knew he wouldn't leave you alone, so there wasn't even a point in persuading him to stay at the party.

"It was fine. I'm glad I went." You told him, sending a smile his way. He returned the gesture, sending you one right back.

"Yeah, me too."

Normally you didn't mind that awkward silence, but this time it felt different. Like both of you wanted to say something, but neither of you could bring yourself to say it.

"Do you, perhaps, want to sleep over at my place tonight?" Aggu asked and reached his hand for yours.

"Yeah, I would like that." You answered him and took his hand. Many times before you had slept over his place. Because that's what best friends do, right? They are everywhere together. They do everything together.

---

"I prepared some clothes for you to change into."

"Thank you Aggu." You took his clothes from him and made your way to the bathroom to shower and then change.

He gave you one of his boxers and white shirt with Bambi on it. It is one of your favourite ones, and he knows that. It was too big for you, but you really didn't mind, it smelled like him. Maybe that's why you liked it that much.

You looked at yourself in the mirror and thought how you actually ended up here. In this situation.

Sighing, you left the bathroom and noticed that Aggu was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at his phone. When he noticed you, he put his phone down. He had to say that he loved to see you in nothing, but his clothes.

"Aggu." You said with a small smile as he kept on staring.

"Aggu." Still nothing, but you could see how his mouth was turning up to a little smile.

"Aggu." You looked down on your feet, feeling hot in the face as he was staring at you.

"I love when you say my name."

You raised your head and made eye contact with him. He was looking right into your eyes.

"You do?"

"I do."

He stood up and made his way towards you. Still holding eye contact, neither of you breaking it. Stepping closer, he carefully put his hands on your hips and said.

"Friends don't look at each other like we do..."

"And we are friends?" You asked, looking into his eyes.

"I'm hoping to be something more..." Aggu admitted. Waiting for your protests, but you didn't say anything.

You put your left hand on the back of his neck, softly running your fingers through the ends of his hair and other hand on his jaw. Leaning closer to him, but keeping safe distance if he didn't want to kiss you back.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked and licket his lips. His focus full on you. "One little kiss won't change our friendship, right?"

"Yeah, you're probably right."

He leaned in and kissed you.

His hands that were on your hips pulled you closer. He pushed you against the cold wall behind you, making goosebumps swarm all over your body. He traced your curves with his hands as he deepened the kiss, nibbling on your lower lip. Your hands gripped the back of his head, as his hands squeezed and teased you, as you moaned into the kiss.

You break apart after a few seconds. A smile on both of your faces as you breathed.

"I love that taste of you." Aggu admitted and dipped his head lower and started kissing your neck. "I love it.”

---

Don't copy or translate my work!

[grind-pantera]

Cleopatra. ( Caesar x Pregnant! Human Reader, Drabble Series. POTA )

I should not listen to myself i said 5 drabbles well well here we are with like 6 and close to 7K words and most of them are smaller oneshots AH. Reblogs, likes, comments all appreciated. I am working on a similiar piece for NOAAAAA!!!!

Beginnings. ( Drabble 1. )

You felt like you couldn’t breathe - the air was sticking onto your lungs, coating them in ashen dust that was laying on the ground of the woods. You needed to move --- Okay, maybe not, grunting that inside of your mind as you attempted to shift your head just a bit to get a bearing onto your surroundings proved futile as red hit your eyes and your neck convulsed under the usual movement. Pain radiated from the back of your head, down to the base of your neck and stagnantly danced on the nerves piled there. Even shifting to press your hand against your stomach was an endeavor and even then, the blood that was on the palm of your hand… You squinted at it, fear setting in as the last drop of whatever adrenaline you had faded into obscurity.

 Was… Was that your blood? Trying to swallow was impossible, planting your face down into the mud and letting out a strangled cry as you attempted to move once again, your teeth gritting against each other but in the scape of the situation, that felt heavenly as compared to the tattering that was running through your muscles. Saliva began mixing into the already impure snow under your body having been mixed previously with mud. One foot, you tried to convince yourself. You just needed one… On… One… Looking down at your right foot as you managed to get yourself kneeling, accomplishment was short-lived as your ears rang, your center of gravity disappearing as did your vision. Falling back, your body was hard to hit the ground. 

In a fitted haze of unconsciousness, you could have sworn you were… Swooped up in one foul move by a set of arms that were much hairier than a humans. Warm, you had thought to yourself, but that could be swelling in your brain telling you that death was on the horizon. Death… Sounded nice versus the incredible tremors of your body, throwing into a it of hypothermia, a cusp of bruises and cut-marks aligning against your already frigid skin to the point where it felt you were going to shatter into shards if you were moved too quickly, to feverishly. How selfishly you wanted to open the door where the knock was coming from. But you had more to think about than just yourself now. 

Flinching at the pain of your abdomen, a pair of hands were astute enough to deduce your intensely fragile situation. 

What… is happening?

Voice of God, it had to be. It trembled in a deep setting baritone, hard and unforgiving. Yes, you wanted to cry, I am with Child but I… Can’t find it in myself… to live…

Found in woods! Nearby Human Camp--- This voice was light and airy but you were unable to process the words that came after that, your mind bending into a haze as you tried to get yourself into a state of lucidity so you could actually focus.  Brought back to Colony when saw she was still alive.

Colony? You wanted to tilt your head but in your jilted state, you were unable to move.

With Child. Not far along, but both will survive if we keep her here and heal.

This voice was a bit more soft spoken, gentle and caressing like the hands that were now placed on your head, your eyes refusing even the most basic of knowledge from your brain to get them open. It smelt like conifer, the highest tree possible, a bird sitting atop and watching the inklings of the ground below its mighty perch. Heaven? There was a lax in the air of contemplation before the baritone voice from earlier spoke. 

She will stay, do what you can to heal. 

And with that command and your mind taking itself to the darkness, even in the state of your eyelids being shut, everything went black. 

Empathetic Ape. ( Drabble 2. )

It did not take long after you finally willed yourself out of your semi-coma to realize that you… Had been taken prisoner by a Colony of Apes. In your mind, you drew the conclusion from the snippets of the conversation you got when you were first brought here in your altered state of reality that… They had found you. Half-alive and brought you back to the Colony at the bid of their King. This… Your eyes narrowed a small bit as you looked over the giant and sweeping bonfire that was built in the middle of this communal space. This Caesar. 

There was irony in the name itself, and you just had to wonder if he knew that. You had woken up nearly a month ago, fading in and out, but able to keep yourself stable enough to process that… They were being kind in healing you. They knew, you drew your arms closer to your stomach as you tightened the animal pelt around your shoulders and gave Caesar a wide stare as he looked over at you, your actions must have torn him from his conversation with the others around him. They knew you were pregnant. They must have thought they were sparing you, not telling you the detailed nature of the camp when they had found you. The--- You choked a small cry, tears pricking at the back of your eyes. The bodies. Your friends. Your family. Your--- Squeezing your eyelids shut, you couldn’t bear to think about it any longer and forced a swallow down before looking at the fire rather blandly. “Do not know… much,” That voice! You jumped on your spot, clutching the pelt even harder and causing your knuckles to go white. Your eyes scaled from the jumping flames, up the hackles of an Apes legs and rested uncomfortably in a sea of green, ablaze from the depths of the fire itself. You swallowed lightly, watching him move in petulant silence as he sat next to you, bowl in his hand. Caesar. Caesar. Your mind was wailing like an old police car.

“About human… Pregnancy.” No shit, you wanted to retort sarcastically but you held your tongue as he held out the bowl in his hand. Fruit. And… You squinted. Roasted fish? Your stomach churned at the prospect of having something other than a slurry of ground up food, something the Apes that were aiding you to heal often fed you as a means to get the food down as fast as possible. Faster, no chance of morning sickness, right? Wrong. You found yourself kneeling over and getting sick more times than you could count. “Might be similar to Ape, but do not know.” In between his choppy English, you grasped the plate carefully with one hand and brought it into your chest with the smallest ‘thank you’. It wasn’t as if the Female Apes that were healing you were awful, they weren’t cordial though. It felt they only did what they needed to to appease the Ape next to you. Strong, mighty and all encompassing Caesar. “I am…” You had begun eating, chewing mildly so as to not disturb the tone of Caesar’s voice. Waving right around the edges, or it could have been your imagination in the front of the roar of a fire, “Sorry…” Furrowing your eyebrows at that, you picked the fish with your pointer finger, suddenly not at all invested in eating as bile switched in your throat. “Lost my mate,” He continued on, your eyes dead-set and widening as you realized he was… displaying empathy. Your mind fogged for a moment. They were capable of that? “Only recently,” Gesturing to the perch you had found yourself watching him on earlier in the evening, he was making direction towards the broader chest of one of the Females that took care of you here. Squinting, you gasped quietly. They were so small, so ingrained in the fur that it was hard to tell there was a baby there, until their tiny head turned to the side and much to your surprise, you were met with a mild azure rather than the scrutiny of green you were so used to. “Blue Eyes, my Son. Mother lost after… Birth.” Not meaning to seem rude, your tried to keep your mouth from falling open dramatically, but it did partially split. “Complications from childbirth?” Surprised at the gentle nature of your voice, you felt a tear slide down your right cheek and you were quick to brush it away. Like it mattered, once one started, there was a flood soon to come. He only nodded, silent and a bit less intimidating than the times you had seen him, times you had interacted before this. “I---” you choked a bit, looking down at the bowl in your hands that Caesar was gracious enough to bless you with, “Don’t know wh-what happened to my husband… Was…” Narrowing your eyes in slight suspicion, you glanced over at him briefly when your voice tapered into nothingness but you forced yourself to speak the next question with no animosity. You needed to know the answer. “Was it Apes?” He’d know the answer, you bargained. Being a King and all. That’s what it was to be a Leader. You knew the good, and you knew the bad. And even worse than all of that, you knew the carnage. “No.” He was assured in that answer as his gaze met yours once again, this time, instead of finding yourself looking away, you drifted towards it, towards some comfort that someone else… Knew about the absolute torn away nature of your heart and how it was so empty now.

“Humans.” There was a twinge of assurance in his voice as he rose, gesturing to the bowl he had given you. “Keep strength up. Not just for yourself, but for…” His eyes flickered down to your stomach, minute in nature but he may as well have been gawking at you. “Child.”

Baby Blue. ( Drabble 3. )

A few months passed and you found yourself easing into the Colony, despite the disgruntled comments you got from a certain Bonobo who shall not be named. That was your nickname for him, and that’s how it remained as Winter fell off and Spring blossomed, the wildflowers bustled through the ground, through the snow that was still encapsulating its livelihood. All of it was going to be gone by the end of the day, you thought mildly as you looked at the Sun.

Taking a bid from Caesar himself, you were basking in the rays, sitting atop a rather comfortable tree trunk that had been rolled onto its side as a means to be sat on. He had convinced you to leave your hut earlier in the day, telling you that Sun was good for Ape pregnancy, it must be good for Humans. There was no intense argument to be made as you gave him a delicate smile, nodding in agreement and finding yourself drenched deliciously in mild-warmth, your scattered and torn paperback book sitting in your lap. 

Looking down at it… You felt a deep yearning and pressing sensation hit your chest. You were showing. Not much, you were sure that the other Apes had yet to notice any change with you, not that you could blame them. As you got adapted to living with them, you became just another part of Colony life and they paid you no heed. Unless you were late for meals. Then Luca was on you ( something you thought that Caesar was responsible for, but it turns out the Silverback was genuinely concerned for you at times ).

 In your time here, he had become your closest ally, even going as far as to call him a friend. He made gentle comments, telling you how glowing you looked today, something he must have heard through the grapevine that humans said about pregnancy, he told you how wonderful it was that your baby was developing, and that you were beginning to actually show. He had explained that with Apes, they all grew small. Small to the point where it was undetectable. You envied that, placing a soft hand against your bump and sighed deeply. Soon, no Ape here would be able to walk past you without gawking, without it looking like you had stolen a ripe melon and decided to shove it under your shirt. 

There was chittering to your side, your head wiping over to investigate. Not too quickly though, even though time had passed, your neck still felt sore if you went to fast in your movements. Blue Eyes, much like yourself, was growing. The phase of always clinging to a Female, or even better, your guilty pleasure when you wanted to see something abnormally cute, clinging to Caesar’s chest, were coming to a close and he was becoming more curious of the world around him, much like yourself.

Chuckling at the fact that you were drawing comparisons to a baby Chimp, you grunted and picked him up as he so often liked to held by you when you would read pages from your book. He had to learn speech, right? And who better to learn from than from a Human who had impeccable --- Well, you tilted your head and smiled at the baby as he crawled himself up your arm, around your shoulder and then back down the other arm, decent skills in English. 

He paused at the same time that you did, a fluttering capturing your abdomen. Was that… It happened again, this time more fervently, your mouth falling into an ‘O’ shape, and any Ape who saw you at this moment were probably assuming that you were laughing. “Did… did you feel that?” You bent your head down and gawked at Blue Eyes, who gave you a small tilt of the head as he placed his dainty hand right upon the top of your bump. Right where you had felt the sensation. The butterflies - The - The… Your baby. 

“You felt that.” Confirming that, Blue Eyes hooted in your lap as a response. You had no idea what he was saying as tears hit the back of your eyes as your face contorted. You began openly sobbing, not a care in the world if anyone saw you. 

Caesar was perched in his normal spot, having just dismissed the council. Koba lingered as he usually did, giving comments about you, about you being with child and how dangerous of a game it really was. But, the King was in no mood to listen to that and told Koba that he would need time to think about his words and they could discuss at a later time.

Blue Eyes-- He had jumped off Caesar’s shoulder mid-meeting. Probably scavenging somewhere for some berries, most likely pestering you though as that slowly became the small Prince’s favorite pastime. Not that Caesar was one to complain. It came with benefits. You were good with Blue Eyes, you were gentle and kind and it gave Caesar actual time with his own thoughts without having to dally on his child. 

He peered down the rock ledge. Spotting you was easy, your scent often gave away your where-abouts to Caesar. Green eyes hit the back of your head first, admiring the tousel of your hair on this particular day and how it appeared naturally highlighted in the sunshine.

You had been reading, Caesar’s suspicions confirmed. Blue Eyes was with you and was most likely getting a mouth full from whatever you were reading to him. Then the shaking of your shoulders. Caesar’s eyes narrowed upon seeing his Son’s small hand on your stomach. He wasn’t… No, no, Blue Eyes wasn’t hurting you, the gentle touch he had was too soft to inflict damage of any sort. Watching in contemplation of whether he wanted to go down there and see what was happening, he saw your hand come up as you lightly placed it on Blue Eyes’, holding it against the shelf of your stomach that was becoming more pronounced. Caesar stopped himself from moving and just… Surveyed. He could hear your mild words fluttering through the air like dandelion seeds. “I think it’s a boy.” Chittering from Blue Eyes. “A girl? Are you sure?”

Camp. ( Drabble 4. )

Caesar had told you that on their most recent delectation of Hunting, on top of snagging a few Elk for the Colony, they had fallen upon what appeared to be a deserted human settlement. He estimated it had been abandoned for only a year, maybe less. Some of the things were coated finely in dust from the woods, no implications that it had been there since the beginning of the Flu and it was in remarkable condition.

He didn't dig into it though, unsure of what items you were in more need of than others and had chosen to come back home and tell you of it. You were prompt to accept the offer to go with him two days from when he told you, now in the present you were teetering yourself to keep balance on the uneven floor of the woods, opting to walk when you were concerned of riding a horse while pregnant. He told you it wasn’t much farther, having left shortly after dawn and stopping a few times as you severely needed to relieve yourself behind a tree, having to tell the Ape King himself not to watch you as he was pretty concerned you could be attacked while out of his sight. Ideas flurried in your mind as you drew closer, Caesar having just stopped to take in the surroundings.

He banked right, and you were quick to follow. You thought about what pieces of clothing you had. Things were beginning to not fit, you were rounding out and getting plump. Your favorite cargo pants were hanging on by a literal hair-tie that you had been using to keep them shut by the front button, your favorite shirt… Well, the Apes, you joked in your head, must have been tired of seeing the bottom of your stomach always innately displayed. 

Some larger shirts would do the trick, nothing needed to be Maternity in a world where that was considered a privilege and luxury. To put things plainly, as you had told the Ape King, who was kind enough now to give you a helping hand right down a small embankment, his other hand coming to ghost right under your bump to keep your center of gravity, leaving you with a wild tinted blush against your cheek when you scuffled against him, chest to bump for a few seconds, beggars could not be choosers. 

Pulling away from Caesar’s grasp was never an easy thing. You wanted nothing more than to sink into him, sink into the tender moments where he had you alone, and vice versa. The late nights of restlessness you found yourself in at times, thinking of your lost family, your husband, the conversations in front of the dying fire where he had finally laid bare his feelings and emotions about the loss of his wife.

Spotting glances through the day, Caesar laid his hands on you only when he was easing to help you. He had taken note that while Cornelia was small, and Chimpanzees were known to carry small, you were quite a delicious spectacle to his eyes in all the best ways and he considered your attention something he actively sought now, though, he was unsure if he was willing to ease himself into admitting that. 

Rounding a large Red Wood, your eyes were witnessed to the camp. If you felt like running, you would surely do that but the fear of falling flat on your face stopped you as you tore away from Caesar and trekked ahead of him, only giving him a glance over your shoulder as if you were asking if it was okay to go in front of him. He did not nod, but he didn't object as you gave him a smile and quickened your pace, hand on the underside of your growing baby to keep yourself steady enough as you sauntered.

The outside was remarkably sparse, nothing to really indicate that Humans had been there, other than a firepit and a few strewn bags like they packed and left in a hurry. But, once you were able to really get your teeth sunk into the abandoned building, from the set up of an old restaurant of sorts, you were able to get a taste of things you had missed. You felt like crying as you came upon a table with a few pieces of clothing on it. Upon further inspection, they were Men’s, XL. Without hesitation, they were placed into the bag that Caesar had provided for the occasion. Three shirts, one red, one black and one white. Basic, but you were bursting at the seams. All you needed were some pants! Maybe some undergarments if there were any. It felt like you were in a retail store! So exciting---

Feet coming to a slow pause they eventually stopped moving and billow of dust remained underfoot. Your eyes wanted to blink, but you were unable to stop. Caesar must have seen you, having rounded you and obscured your vision from what you were focused on in a darkened corner. He didn't touch you, he wasn’t sure if that was allowed as tears slid down your cheeks.

One at a time before they came down in a torrential rain. You pushed past him as if he weren’t even there and trailed forward, dropping to your knees without reserve as you grasped the small teddy bear into your hands. There was a name embroidered upon it. Fingers touched the thread, pink in color. Cedar. 

Caesar drew near you carefully, the sob you let out was nothing short of shocking and he felt the hackles of his fur standing on edge as if someone were there intentionally hurting you. 

“A… baby…” You whimpered to him, holding up the bear for him to take. He saw nothing special about it as he grasped it with one hand and you shuffled on your hands and knees, baring the pain it was causing you against the tile flooring and came upon a few tangled up pieces of clothing. Small. So… So very small… “Th-They had a baby…” Crying out again, you grasped the clothing and held it in your hands before falling back onto your butt, “Do-do you think they-they’re still alive?” Caesar had no words, his eyes widened at the turmoil you were suddenly thrusted in. No explanation, perhaps those… Pregnancy hormones you had joked about from time to time, Caesar thought and narrowed his eyes on you. He didn't… know how to comfort you. You were crumbling down right in front of him.

He knew you were going to need help getting off the ground though, and he was careful to crouch next to you. Plucking the baby clothing out of your hand, he placed them lightly onto the floor, your eyes squeezing shut and without a word, you collapsed right against. Caesar was fast to react, grunting a small bit as he moved himself, and then you enough to get your body to sit in his actual arms rather than against him.

“B-B-B-...” You stuttered, the Ape hoisting you upwards to get you out of the dusty nature of the floor, you clung onto him tightly. “Do-Do you think they…” Caesar surged a bit at your implied questions, grasping you that much tighter. The side of your bump conformed against his broad chest. “I--- I am sure they got out. That they are fine.” He did not feel comfortable bluntly lying about something that he had no basis for, but as the tears fell from your eyes, as you grasped his forearm tightly, your fingers digging to the point where you were touching his skin and no longer his fur, Caesar didn't care. He’d lie his tongue off just to get you to a sense of comfort. 

Bumping Foreheads. ( Drabble 5. )

The water surging against your back felt incredible. Pressing your hands to the small of your back, right above your tailbone you grunted gently and eased back into the chill of the small waterfall you had been blessed to enjoy in the spotting Summer evenings. It was still early in the season, but it was beckoning you more and more to enjoy. You knew that Caesar was in the area - probably only meters away, and paying his eyes attention elsewhere as to not see you naked, but his hearing and his scent were always on the prowl. Three times a week he’d bring you to the secluded waterfall, letting you bathe and release the tension he knew that your body was going through. 

You were large - to the point where you had accidentally bumped into a bowl of blueberries this morning and it went tumbling down the rock face. Before you managed to cry though, Blue Eyes began eating them right off the ground and Caesar even blessed you with a mild joke of ‘they… are not completely… ruined’. That did make you feel better as you sniffled and nodded in agreement. All things were cleared away when you took in the water, letting the chill seep into your pores as you tilted your head backwards to let it drain against your face. Feeling the kick on the side of your stomach, you winced at the severity of it against your ribs as your baby had turned to start playing against the bones there to let you know they were content with the water too. Maybe a bit cold for their tastes, but they were snuggly inside of your stomach, wrapped in eternal warmth until you were ready. Until they were ready, you thought, laughing and pressing your fingers against the side of your abdomen. They reacted right away to your touch, something like a hand or foot pushing back and you took in the sight of your stomach stretching with their movements. 

You had no care in the world anymore. Hell, you thought to yourself in your bliss of the moment, you’d let Caesar see you bare in all your glory. It was the most comfortable. Clothes were restricting, especially in the heat that started to stick around in the early afternoons into the evenings. You thought about that again… You’d… Let Caesar see you either way. The vague notion left you more than amused. He must have thought it pretty grotesque what your body was doing to itself in a bid to grow another Human. 

The stretching of your skin, the wild-card emotions that you became comfortable letting loose around him, your breasts were unfortunately too big for any of your undergarments and you were unable to find one that was accommodating and you ended up going the last few weeks without one. You could have sworn you’d seen him staring at them, but that could have just been in your mind as ravishing ideas ran through you and rested rather uncomfortably between your legs when Caesar stared at you a bit too long. How you tried to push aside the feeling.

The pestering in the back of your head. Maybe, just the hormones, you tried to convince yourself over and over. You were pregnant, you were alone… It made sense, right? To… Want to be… satisfied? Your thoughts came to a slow stop as you looked down at yourself. Unable to see your feet, you still wiggled your toes like you were able to and sighed deeply. He probably found you unattractive beyond belief. 

“Are you… done?” Caesar asked, not shouting but loud enough for you to hear over the waterfall itself. He was close, as you had suspected, his deep baritone coming from the right of you. “Nearly sundown.”

“Yes. Can you toss my blanket on the shore for me to grab?” You asked, waddling yourself out of the water's way and into the open space of the small river that the water trickled into, grasping your hair and wringing it out. That was the rule. He’d throw your blanket on the ground, you’d wrap yourself up in it so he couldn’t see you naked, and you’d dry yourself, re-cloth your body and head back to the Colony, less than a click to the west. 

With your arms still in your hair and your eyes shut as you enjoyed the last feelings of water against you, you could hear Caesar moving. Figuring that the blanket had been placed previously, you thought nothing of it and thought that he was just moving out of the way again as to not see you bare. Releasing your hair with a small groan, you opened your eyes and looked at the shore. Green.

Green eyes.

Green eyes staring at you.

Green eyes staring at you while you were naked.

Caesar didn't move. It appeared he was completely frozen, blanket still in his hands and you were flashing him without reserve. If you were able to move quickly, you were sure you would but you found it difficult to do as you wadded through the water with a fast paced waddle. At least, it was fast for you, it probably looked pretty comical to the Ape. Caesar was still frozen, his eyes had drifted downwards towards your chest to linger for a moment before they finally rested right on your bump. Protruding… And not appealing, you groaned internally and clutched the blanket right out of his hand and untangled it. 

“Caesar.”

Nothing, he was still looking at your bump as you wrapped the blanket around your shoulders. “Caes--” Your hands were grasped. Actually, it was more or less your wrists and with one swoop, the blanket was pooling at your feet and you brought your knees together for a moment when he caught eyes with you before they trailed right back down your body. Supple breasts, he noted, nice, nice bump, he had only really seen a pregnant human this close to him through the screen of a TV back when he was with Will.

The rounding, dipping between your legs--- Caesar stopped himself at that and trailed his gaze back upwards to rest right on the top of your bump, looking down at it.  Being self-conscious finally hit you as you tried to hide yourself away from the judgment he was placing down on you, but Caesar just… Admired. You supposed that was the right word, you had no premonition as to what he was thinking or what he was do---

Without even asking, his hand was placed on you. Not just on you, but on the bump that encased your baby. Right on the underside of it, he drew his hand in as far in as it would go. Shuddering at the chilly nature of his already leathery skin, your eyes widened, mouth ajar as your breathing had picked up.

With your mind racing, you were frantic to look into his eyes to get any idea of what he was thinking, even if it meant you needed to tear his head open just to get a glimpse. Your bottom lip quivered at the feeling, a direct response your body was giving to the fact that you were being touched. No, no… Your knees went weak for a second, but Caesar grasped you with his free hand under your elbow to keep you steady, refusing to relent control on your stomach. You were being caressed. 

“I-I’m probably fatter than the Apes get.” You tried to get him to look at you, you tried to get him to say something other than standing defenseless. “I---” Gasping quietly, Caesar moved his hand from the undercarriage to the top where he brushed the pads of his fingers in the most feather-like way he was able to muster. It tickled, but you bit your tongue in a bid to see what he was doing. You knew, oh how you knew now, he wasn’t going to hurt you. 

“Have never seen…” He started.

“Yeah, well, we get fat.” You joked again, jolting your shoulders forward for you to cup your arms on top of your bump and shield yourself from his eyes. Before you even had a chance to do that though, Caesar's free hand that had previously been cupping your elbow moved. You had no time to react as he cupped the back of your head and brought it towards his own. Breathless, not due to the baby for once, you swallowed hard, shutting your eyes and let it happen. Caesar’s forehead lightly kissed your own.

Lightly at first, but as he tangled his thick fingers into your hair, he pulled your neck towards his own with a bit more fever, his own eyes squeezing shut at the silent admittance. The hand that was tracing your bump remained, but now was placed on the side. His entire hand spread, finger to finger, across the entire scape of your skin and you sunk into it with a small moan of satisfaction. This… you thought, letting your eyes flutter open for just one moment so you could see him this close to you. This was where you belonged.

Birth. ( Drabble 6. )

The intensity of your screams were not for the faint of heart, and you figured that was the case and shared sentiment of the Female Ape midwives that flanked your entire body, one working diligently between your legs to gauge your dilation. Caesar had known it to be hard for Humans, their babies were much larger than Ape babies and required a lot more pushing and vigor to actually induce birth. Hours, he thought to himself, his eyes tired and red around the edges, his hand, as tough as it had been for years, was nothing more than a swelled appendage from your hand grasping at it so tightly, fingernails digging into the calloused skin when another contraction set in your vision and racked your entire body of all senses. 

You were beyond sweating, you felt like you were swimming as Caesar brought his free hand up to wipe some of your wet hair away from your face. His skin felt cold against you, and for that, you leaned your head into the small wave of affection from him before another shot of pain dripped through you relentlessly. 

“I can’t do this!” You cried, your knees shaking as the midwife looked at Caesar who only nodded with a hard swallow. They were telling him in silence that you were ready. 

“You can.” He assured, but that felt fruitless as you hunched forward, bump contouring all sorts of ways in a very unnatural way that made even Caesar uncomfortable but he was steady fast and refused to leave your side. He knew this, he had been through this with Cornelia… He tried to not linger on that for too long. 

Things would be different, he tried to keep optimism alive as the midwife told you verbally that it was time to push. The extrusion on your face caused the Ape King to shut his eyes for a moment as you grunted out, attempting to push the baby from your body to greet the world. Yes… He laxed himself and reached around your entire head to hold onto you as you screamed to the highest heavens, things were going to be different. You… You could do this. You were going to preserver and you would have a new addition to the family that Caesar had already provided for you. He knew he couldn’t cry, not in front of the others, but how he just wanted to take all your pain away. It was hard not to go feral, the simple smell of your blood and sweat were eradicating his entire nose. He didn't dare look down and kept his green gaze focused on the side of your face as he was propped next to you, laying in the nest. “Ohhhh my god!” You jolted with another push, breathing rapidly and it felt like your entire chest was suddenly on fire after being cold for so long. Plunged into an ice bath and then sent to the depths of a volcano. “Caesar!” One more. The midwife signed at Caesar one handed, the other properly braced between your legs. 

“You need to give one more,” Caesar said and brought his hand through your hair once more. Swallowing, you felt a shudder run down your spine at the prospect of having to give it more despite giving it your all already. You were being torn in half, someone grasping both legs and pulling with all their might and they wanted you to give more. Strangling a cry out, Caesar brought his forehead down and planted it directly onto yours. “One more…”

As if a robot shocked back to life, Caesar still holding onto your head and moving forward as you braced yourself, you gave it one more as commanded. The sheer terror of your scream faded into the wails of a baby… A… baby… Your mind fogged. Concern swept over the Ape as he grasped the side of your face. “A girl,” He told you, breathing against your cheek and right into your ear, “A girl.” 

Repeating that seemed to bring you right back from the trenches as tears flooded down your face, mixing deliciously with the sweat that had fallen from your forehead. Even now, you felt you were unable to breathe as you tried to smile - It was a forced grin of sorts, Caesar could tell that you were still in pain, but the crying of the baby… Caesar finally allowed himself to look down as the midwife was fast to adjust them properly in their arms before drifting upwards carefully to place them against your bare chest.

They were smeared with blood but… His eyes admired their small features. Carbon copies almost of your own when you were scrunched up for sleep. You have done it. You… Grew this… You made this Human and you preserved through the endeavors of birth. You began crying alongside your baby, hands reaching up and grasping at them lightly to keep them close to your chest. 

“Girl.” You finally managed to say something, your throat dry and incredibly hoarse. “Girl?” Asking that to your mate, he nodded and brought a hand up to rest against the child's small head.

“Girl.” Caesar confirmed.

Bonus ending:

Blue Eyes… Was incredibly cautious upon hearing the wailing of a human baby to the point where he grasped at Caesar’s chest with his small frame with all his might, his gaze intent on staring down whatever was causing the noise. With a small hush, you got them to quiet down against you, now lightly wrapped in a blanket you had for this very moment. 

‘New sister.’ Caesar signed for the Prince, looking at the now newly adorned princess with a soft gaze. ‘Say hello.’ He was still hesitant, but at the urging of Caesar himself as he placed Blue Eyes on the nest by your feet, you both watched in anticipation as the small Chimp moved his way up your body, making eye contact with you in a flurry of affection and happiness that you were still here. It had been an entire day where you and Caesar were gone and he was left to hang with the other Young Apes with Maurice, and he hadn’t the slightest clue where you were until now. Until… He crawled onto your shoulder as he so often did, your eyes shutting for a moment as he played along your hair before his gaze fell to the bundle in your arms. 

It was your turn to speak, “Blue,” He looked at you, suddenly frantic at the sound of your voice like he had forgotten, “This is your baby sister… Cedar.”

Bonus Ending ( 2 ):

Three Months Later.

Caesar, in his wildest dreams, never imagined he’d be holding a human baby, let alone the one of his mate. His tender gaze rested on you as you were laying in the nest, wrapped tightly in for a nap with Blue Eyes resting beside you, as he had offered to care for the baby that afternoon when you complained of being adversely tired. He did worry upon his offering that it would be difficult to care for them alone, but he didn't realize just how much they actually slept and Cedar seemed really intent on doing that in the warmth of her Father’s arm. 

He drew his gaze down to look at her. 

So small, and so gentle… Every day, Caesar thought to himself, she looked more like you. So beautiful.

Was she… Caesar’s brows furrowed for a moment at the curling of the baby’s mouth. She was… Smiling. Right up at him. Familiar, her head tilted towards Caesar’s chest minutely but the movement was there for him as he swallowed hard at the sight. 

She smiled at him.

Bonus Ending ( 3 ):

Five Years Later.

“Cedar, you need to get down from that tree right now!” You yelled, looking at the Chimp sitting next to the human, high up off the ground. Well, not that high up. Maybe two or three meters at the most but the idea of a fall was not for the faint of heart as the two young laughed. 

‘We climb higher,’ Blue Eyes signed to his sister. ‘That way mom cannot find us.’

There wasn’t any contemplation. Cedar nodded in agreement, grabbing the bark and began her ascent. 

“CAESAR!!! OUR SON BROUGHT OUR DAUGHTER INTO A TREE AND I CAN’T GET THEM DOWN! I SWEAR THEY GET THIS UNRULY BEHAVIOR FROM YOUR SIDE OF THE FAMILY!”

[myhyperfixatedmess]

"This One Means Forever"

Spencer Reid x Reader

The BAU's hunt for an unsub goes terribly wrong.

—

The air in the abandoned warehouse was thick with tension, the shadows of the old building casting eerie shapes against the cracked walls. The BAU team moved cautiously through the dimly lit corridors, weapons drawn, as they closed in on their unsub. Spencer Reid’s mind was racing, the urgency of their mission intensified by the presence of his partner, you, somewhere in the same perilous building.

It had all gone wrong so quickly. They had split up to cover more ground, a necessary but always risky tactic. Now, with the unsub unpredictable and desperate, Spencer’s heart pounded in his chest, each step echoing with the dread of not knowing where you were or what you might be facing.

“Reid, where are you?” Hotch’s voice crackled through the comms, steady yet laced with concern.

“South wing,” Spencer replied, trying to keep the anxiety out of his voice. “I’m heading toward the main floor.”

“Be careful,” Hotch urged. “We believe the unsub is armed and extremely dangerous.” Spencer swallowed hard, his grip tightening on his gun. “Copy that.”

As he rounded a corner, a muffled cry reached his ears. It was a sound that chilled him to the bone—your voice, strained and terrified. His heart lurched, and he broke into a run, his fear propelling him forward faster than his mind could calculate the risks.

He burst into a large, empty room, its high ceilings and empty crates providing plenty of places to hide. But his eyes were immediately drawn to the center, where the unsub held you, a knife pressed dangerously against your throat.

Spencer’s voice cracked as he called out your name.

“Spencer, don’t!” you gasped, your eyes wide with terror but your focus sharp. “He has a bomb.”

The unsub's face twisted into a cruel smile. “Nice to see you, Dr. Reid. Thought you might join us.”

Spencer's mind raced, assessing the situation. The unsub had a bomb, but his primary weapon was the knife at your throat. He could see the fear in your eyes, not for yourself but for the danger that hung over them all.

“Please,” you begged, your voice breaking. “Don’t do this.”

Spencer felt his heart shatter at your plea. He raised his hands, trying to stay calm.

“You don’t have to do this,” he said, his voice shaking. “Whatever you want, we can work it out. Just let her go.”

“You think you can just waltz in here and fix everything, genius?” the unsub sneered. “You took everything from me. Now I’m taking everything from you.”

Hotch, JJ, and Morgan had arrived, positioning themselves around the room, weapons trained on the unsub. The tension was palpable, each second feeling like an eternity.

“Please, just let her go,” Spencer begged, tears welling in his eyes.

But the unsub’s grip tightened on the knife, and you winced, a small cry escaping your lips. “No more negotiating,” he growled. “This ends now."

Time seemed to slow as the unsub moved. Your eyes met Spencer’s, a look of pure fear and desperate love in them. “I love you,” you mouthed, your eyes brimming with tears.

“No!” Spencer screamed, lunging forward as a shot rang out, echoing through the empty space. The unsub staggered, a look of shock on his face before he crumpled to the ground.

But the knife had already done its damage. You collapsed, blood staining your clothes. Spencer was at your side in an instant, his hands shaking as he tried to stop the bleeding.

“Stay with me,” he pleaded, his voice breaking. “You’re going to be okay.”

Your hand clutched his, your grip weak but insistent. “Spencer,” you gasped, your eyes searching his. “I’m so sorry…” Hotch and the others were calling for medics, but Spencer barely heard them. All he could focus on was your pale face, your eyes slowly losing their light.

“Please, you can’t leave me,” he sobbed, pressing his forehead against yours. “We need you. I need you.”

Your lips trembled in a faint smile. “I love you,” you whispered, your voice so faint he could barely hear it. “Forever.”

And then you were gone. The life drained from your eyes, and your hand slipped from his grasp. Spencer’s world shattered in that instant, the pain more than he could bear. He clutched your lifeless body, his cries of anguish echoing through the warehouse.

The team watched in silence, their hearts breaking for their friend. Losing you, the agony etched on Spencer’s face, was a wound that would leave them all scarred.---In the weeks that followed, the BAU struggled to return to their normal rhythm.

The loss was a heavy burden, but it was Spencer who bore the brunt of the grief. He moved through his days in a daze, haunted by memories of you, the dreams you had shared.

Your home, once filled with laughter and warmth, now felt hollow and empty. The reminders of your life together were everywhere—the books you had read, the plans you had made. Each one was a knife twisting in Spencer’s heart.

He often found himself staring at your shared memories, lost in the past. The pain of losing you, of the future you had been robbed of, was a wound that time could never heal.

[lemotmo]

I'm going to try and approach this a bit differently. We have all been in a position where we desperately wanted something from a show. We can all relate to the desire for something you love to become canon. I still fret about whether or not they'll actually give us Buddie. Yes it has been sign posted but it's been sign posted for years and we're still waiting. Anyway I say that part to say this next part. They are sign posted. The canon signs are there and there everywhere. None of it is made up from nothing. Yes there are headcanons but that's true of every ship. But most of the headcanons have canon scenes that they stem from. The BT stuff is all headcanon. I keep seeing gifs of Buck with gifs of Lou from other acting rolls and them being tagged as bucktommy. Those gifs have nothing to do with 911 and aren't Tommy. None of it is based on canon. It has all come from their cameo conversations with Lou. And that genuinely dumbfounds me. Because now I see less and less Buck and it's increasingly Tommy centered.

Buck is the character the show cares about and they know that. I don't know enough about the SWAT theory to speak to it's truth or not but the timing of its renewal and him going 911 dark does somewhat feed into the rumor. I don't know, it's bad enough so many of them have become horrible towards Eddie but now they're starting to change who Buck canonically is to fit their headcanons of Tommy (the whole damsel in distress nonsense enrages me). And while I understand the desire to push for what you love, basic knowledge of the show has to play into your expectations at some point. It will be interesting(terrifying) to see how they react when his arc finishes, and he himself stated it was an arc(hello people he said this) so I'm just forever dumbfounded as to how we got here and I'm someone who genuinely tried to see where they're coming from.

*sigh* sorry for the length of this ask. Your blog is lovely.

Yes Nonny. Yes! All of this! This has been on my mind for so long now and you managed to summarize it so beautifully.

I simply do not get how we got here. A couple of months ago, everything was great in this fandom. We had no great expectations of Buddie canon, but we were happy to be on ABC so we could maybe get some more Buddie scenes. And we did get them. Season 7 was great for Buddie.

Unfortunately it also brought along Tommy. I was and still am thrilled for Buck being revealed as being bisexual. It's wonderful! And the initial thrill of it was exciting. I immediately started tying this in to Eddie. A lot of us in the Buddie fandom have long since theorised that, as soon as one of them would come out, the other would follow because it would be the only thing to make sense. Buck and Eddie have both been queer-coded for so long now and finally we would see some movement in their story.

Imagine my surprise when suddenly some people decided that Tommy was the best thing that had ever happened to Buck. It was all Tommy this, Tommy that, Tommy with the sun shining out of his ***. I was so confused. Even some of my Buddie mutuals who I had known for years, just kind of gave up on Buddie and started worshipping at the altar of Tommy Kinard.

And the fact that Lou started spouting his headcanons in those cameos definitely didn't help either. Some people really believe in those headcanons.

And listen, nothing against headcanons. I have some of my own. But there is a reason why they are called 'head'canons. It's because they are things you see and recognise in a character, but they aren't discussed in the show, so they aren't 'canon'. They remain 'fanon'.

Now, don't get me wrong, ship and let ship. But there is a difference between normal 'shipping' and liking the pair, and the total craziness the Tommy-hype has become.

I know a lot of people that are multi-shippers and I have mutuals who like BT as a transitional relationship, but ultimately still want Buddie. I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about the people who suddenly started talking down on Eddie as if he was treating Buck badly and how he was a bad father. And how, even if he were queer, Buck would never choose him over Tommy. Where did that come from? They didn't say that before. Why now?

And I ask the question: What is so special about Tommy? I keep seeing people that say Buck is in the best relationship ever. HOW? WHAT? WHERE? What do these people see that I don't see?

We have seen Tommy in a handful of scenes. In all of those scenes he has been dismissive, disrespectful and frankly not very interesting. There is no chemistry at all with Buck either. I mean, if there had been some palpable chemistry I might have liked it more, but it just seems as if Lou is going through the motions in those kisses. If they are such a great couple, where are the little couple things? Where is the handholding? The little in-jokes? Nothing! I mean, Oliver does his best to keep their scenes somewhat afloat, but Lou is clearly not even trying. So I truly do not understand this strange -almost obsessive and gatekeeping- behaviour when it comes to Lou and Tommy.

It's obvious-- and anyone with eyes can see this from miles away-- that Tommy is a narrative device to have Buck explore his bisexuality. Every single thing in the show, but also around the show, is pointing in that direction.

Think about it. There was no promotion whatsoever for BT, only for bi Buck and Buddie. They had one abysmal interview where they talked for 2 seconds about BT and Oliver looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there. They have given Tommy no screentime whatsoever. He is only there when it is required for Buck's storyline. It practically screams: plot device.

Then we have Ryan giving interviews where he, once again, talks about Buck being a co-parent and how Eddie will explore himself in season 8. How he will push that refresh button and he will ultimately find the partner he needs. All gender neutral by the way.

I mean, look... I admit to having been delulu in the past over small things when it comes to Buddie. What can I say? It's been a long 6 years. But this? This is no longer about being delusional. This is full-blown 'in your face': BUDDIE IS HAPPENING! It's all right there when you look at it logically.

But yes, somehow, we are wrong because our ship isn't canon and it's apparantly homophobic to be against a canon ship?

Which... do these people know what fandom is actually about? It's about fictional people and we want to see these fictional people get interesting story arcs and we want some of them to end up together because they have such a great history and chemistry. Like Buddie.

So yes Nonny, I agree. And listen, I do too still fret sometimes that I might be seeing things that aren't there. It's in my nature as a libra to doubt everything.

But then I start putting all of the evidence in- and outside of the narrative together and... it can only lead to one thing: queer Eddie (which is about time) and eventually Buddie.

And imagine the payoff that will be. Imagine how the viewership will get a boost. So many more people would turn in. Bi Buck was big, but the fan favourite queer slow burn getting together after 7 seasons by then? The internet will explode. It will be epic.

For 6 seasons we have been rooting for these men to open their eyes and to see what is right in front of them. There were plans to go there, but FOX stopped it. Now they are on ABC and obviously ABC is okay with queer characters on their shows. I mean, look at 'Grey's anatomy'.

So yes, I proudly declare myself no longer delulu and 100% certain that Buddie is in the works. There is no more need for clown noses and clown cars. We are beyond that now. It's a matter of 'when', not 'if'.

Mind you, just my humble opinion here. But I stand with it.

[mischiefmaker615]

The Boy is Mine

Rating: R

Summary: Loki finds you after dark.. but who owns who? 

Note: Based off the song The Boy is Mine by Ariana Grande

Requester: @Laer111ee (wattpad)

*Insert slut song here First and play as you read LOL*

Your hips swayed from side to side as your fingers gripped the pole firmly to keep your balance. Shifting your weight as you swung yourself, arched your back and flipped your hair, all were the main ingredience to get the big bucks coming, especially with those regular fat cats in the audience that continued to gawk at you for the 5th day in a row. It paid the bills at least, kept your head away from other problems and.. you just really loved to dance.

Your hair was loose, make up was light but still captured a sexy look, you ditched the ridiculous high heels and just put on the shorter ones that almost said ‘sexy business woman’ and you had your favorite black outfit that almost resembled slave Leia from Star Wars.. or at least, that’s what that one guy shouted from the audience that one time.

As soon as your last song ended, you struck your pose and closed your eyes, catching your breath with a smile as the feeling of paper brushed against your exposed skin as people threw cash and cat called. After a moment, you collected it all after a corny bow and headed down the stairs for the next girl to take over.

‘’hey Y/N, some fella in curtain 5 paid for a private dance’’ your boss whispered before you could get to the back rooms. His grip on your arm indicated his usual ‘I’m telling’ not ‘asking’.

Your eyes glanced over at the closed curtain room, as if expecting to see the gentleman right there and glanced at your boss with a sigh. ‘’fine, then I’m done for the night.’’

‘’sure.’’ He waved off and disappeared elsewhere.

After placing your bag in your locker, tiding yourself up a bit and even changing into something similar, just with more exposed leg space for your usual lap dances and headed over. Ignoring the stares and cat calling as you pass people, you paused at the curtain and took a deep breath- knowing you’ve done hundreds but it was just to prepare for.. anything, and went in.

“hello darling, you’ve never mentioned about your little side business..’’

You stopped dead in your tracks with wide eyes and queasy stomach. Your body ran a cold shiver up your spine as you remained a deer in the headlights at who sat before you, manspreading and comfortable, rocking his perfect black suit and your expression was still.

Snake..

‘’what the hell are you doing here?’’ you managed to squeeze out, your voice not indicating any anger but more.. uncertainty as you glanced at the curtain behind you to make sure it was closed.

‘’don’t worry darling, I’ll keep your little secret’’ Loki smirked and laced his fingers together before him with a cross of his legs. ‘’but might I say, you do look ravishing, especially displaying your skillset and.. assets on stage’’ he smirked, trying to get a rise out of you.

So he had been there that long.. your eyes narrowed in challenge as you remained calm. At least on the outside. Loki has been your long-time crush for a long time, having seen him amongst the tower many times to share some playful bickering and knowledgeable conversation here and there. He was someone to keep things interesting, never boring and got your mind to always think- unlike the dull and self-centered males that also occupied the tower. Most of them anyway. Being an Avenger was also your job, but you just couldn’t give up your first job here when Stark offered you the position, so you worked both, this one obviously in secret- until now.

‘’how did you know I was here?’’ you questioned, crossing your arms as worry showed on your brow nevertheless.. for some strange reason you trusted he would keep your secret- it didn’t mean he wouldn’t use it against you though.

‘’the tower tends to get rather boring, and most of your Midgardian locations don’t suit my interest. But you do, you’ve always have..’’ his voice got dangerously low as he leaned forward as he spoke. ‘’so, I followed you. you tended to disappear every evening and I got curious’’ he smirked.

You looked away a little as he spoke, glad the dim lighting hid your blush you felt come to your cheeks as you took a deep breath. Were you really going to do this? ‘’..you know I could always refuse you right?’’ you challenged out of curiosity.

‘’true,’’ he shrugged, relaxing back on the couch as he watched you, his eyes slipping down from yours a few times. ‘’but I could tell a part of you actually wants to do this,’’ he smirked, his eyes flicking up to yours again. ‘’and I don’t even have to blackmail you.’’

Your eyes narrowed as you stared at each other, almost daring to see who would do what first, but unfortunately it was all you. he was the customer and you hated that he was right. He wasn’t just a customer; you had wanted him for a long time; there was no use in denying it. if you had to do this, you were going to take your time and take charge. You will not give him a chance to belittle or doubt, this was your job and you were good at it.

As if on que, the music had started playing again and you wished you had taken a shot of tequila while you had put your stuff away, because the way he gazed at you now was making it hard to focus. He was sat back, limbs loose and relaxed as if he had been drinking a bit himself. His legs were a bit more together now, his slender hands resting at his thighs as his eyes drank you in now. His expression was difficult to read, but you could tell by his deep breathing and how now and again he would shift a little, that he was aroused, and that made you extremely powerful to offer your own smirk.

Taking a small step forward to be more in the center of his room, you kept your half-lidded eyes on him as your hands gently brushed over your thighs, slowly swaying your hips in the beat of the music while they slowly rose and flattened a little at your covered center.

His chin tilted up as his eyes seemed to pry, almost as if trying to look right through your clothes themselves as he swallowed and remained his composure. Your body slowly turned, showing off as your hands slowly rose around your hips and brushed against your perfect ass with your cut dress covering your intimate parts before you slowly faced him again while you gripped your chest.

Your eyes closed then, as if your own touch alone could make you orgasm and your fingers traveled into your hair while your lips parted. While your eyes were closed as you moved to the music, Loki’s hands briefly brushed against his pants as he began getting antsy, his jaw tight but he remained patient as he drank you in. gods you were beautiful, and you both knew it. the fact that he also knew your personality form your encounters at home as well he felt you were all the sexier.

His breath hitched when you placed your hands on his knees, feeling him having no rejection as you leaned forward and he took advantage of the view of your cleavage. Feeling his tense but loose limbs, you pushed his legs apart, standing between them as you remained holding eye contact and you smirked, seeing a small flash of defeat in his eyes that he hated and loved at the same time.

You had the upper hand now.

You turned yourself and slowly, just ever so slowly to tease him- more- began grinding your ass on him. depending on the package, it could involve touch, but you still weren’t expecting your breath to hitch when you felt his slender hands rest at your hips, his finger tips lightly digging into your flesh as he used strained control to bring you harder again him. speaking of..

By the gods he was huge, and you could feel yourself getting aroused every time he pulled and you pushed your cunt against his hard cock. You almost felt like you could salivate as your grinded more into him, hearing him growl as his grip strengthened ever so slightly, as if to stop himself from slapping your ass. You had him where you wanted him and pulled away, his fingers hesitating to let you go as you turned around to face him and placed your hands on his shoulders with do-me-eyes.

Loki’s lips parted weakly as he remained himself to breath, his eyes looking up into yours as if silently begging for you to take him. you wanted to.. if you wouldn’t get fired. Though it didn’t mean you couldn’t tease him a bit as you got onto his lap, your thighs resting against his while your cunt began grinding itself again on his bulge.

His hands went back to your hips as fast as magnets, wanting to grope and touch but he was unsure if he was allowed. You felt him squeeze your flesh as he leaned forward, making you grip his shoulders more as he inhaled your scent with fluttering eyes closed.

This gave you the perfect opportunity to lean forward and run your tongue teasingly up his neck, making your body lift as his cock got impossibly bigger to raise you. his eyes shock open with blown, hungry pupils and his own cologne filled your sensed as you gazed at him. he gave you a frustrated breath, his hips almost thrusting up as if he forgot you both were clothed.

Just to add fuel to the fire, your hands ran down his chest and took his wrists, pulling them off your thighs to rest against your chest as he eagerly began to massage and knead. His eyes never left yours as he almost seemed to study you, admiration on his features as if he never thought this moment would be possible- and he was still trying to believe it.

his thumbs ghosted under the edge of your bra at the bottom-if you want to call it a bra. It was thin as paper, you might as well of not have been wearing one as his movements slowed, asking silent permission as his teeth grasped his bottom lip lightly. Giving a small smile with a nod, his thumbs lifted the bra forward enough to slip his hands in and he almost shuddered in pleasure as he grasped your globes. Your head almost fell back as you moaned, slowing your griding at his bulge to deep, long strokes and you felt a warm tongue run up your neck.

You pulled away just enough to give him a playful smile as he shared one, knowing it was a pay back tease before a hand left your chest to move to the back of your head. It moved it forward, his fingers lightly grasping your hair as he tilted your head up and began sucking at your neck. Your hands went to his shoulders, nails digging into his suit as your own body shuddered in pleasure. He left open mouth kisses below your jawline and ran his tongue to your collar bone.

‘’F-Fuck..’’ you breathed before there was a knock outside the room.

‘’hey Y/N, I’m not paying over time.’’ your boss called and you realized the music had stopped.

Loki pulled away and removed his hands to rest at your hips, looking up at you curiously as you both caught your breaths.

‘’..the songs over..’’ you whisper, your eyes breaking contact as you use his shoulders to help yourself off of him and he keeps his hands on your hips for as long as possible as he lets go and stands up.

His height reminds you just how different you both are as you brush and straighten your clothes before you feel his hand at your chin and lift it to look at him. his expression was gentle but deadly serious and seriously still aroused.

‘’what time are you off?’’

Your blush darkens and you could feel your arousal as your thighs close tight. ‘’now-‘’

He leans down a bit, his knees bending to accommodate his height as he holds your eyes hostage and your noses almost touch.

‘’then this is most certainly not over.’’

Tag List: @foxherder @asgards-princess-of-mischief @fire-in-her-veinz

Note: Thank you for reading! it's kind of like a series~ you send songs, i write based off of them LOL my other songs i have done are here~

Boyfriend by Dove Cameron 

Die For You by The Weekend 

[ladykailitha]

Never Hold Back Your Step... Part 9

Yay!! Another chapter of this lovely chronicle. I really do recommend going back and re-reading a bit since it's been so long.

But in this we have Harrington Sr. being an ass, the most epic confrontation I've ever written, and Dustin being sweet and asshole at the same time. The kid has range.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

****

Late at night in the last days before the school ended, they would climb up on the roof of the trailer and talk about their hopes and dreams.

Eddie had told him that he was going to try third time lucky to graduate. And then if he didn’t make it next year, he’d take the GED and walk away, ready to join Steve wherever he was. Not that he wanted to leave Eddie behind or the kids. But if he was to go to college, he’d have to.

Steve walked across that stage to thunderous applause, all his friends, the kids, Eddie and Wayne all cheering for him. Even Nancy and Jonathan had been there to cheer him on. But there, in the stands frowning at the people Steve had surrounded himself with, were his parents.

Steve knew he should feel grateful that they came at all. But he knew it was more about image and appearing to be the perfect parents than any actual interest. He saw them clap politely and then his father pulled out a newspaper and his mother fussed with her hair and makeup the whole time.

They took pictures with him afterwards with fake smiles plastered on and took him out to dinner to talk about his future. Which was all about joining the company and getting his business degree. Two things that Steve had no interest in doing.

He had hoped to get scholarships for college based on his sports so that he wouldn’t have to rely on his dad’s money, but that fell through.

He had missed the early decision deadline, because he had had his head smashed in. So he had sent the applications off at the start of the new year. But by then his grades had slipped due to the concussion and the letters coming back weren’t a good sign.

He would just have to try and reason with his dad about college and keep his fingers crossed he’d get out of this town somehow.

****

“These are your grades?” Mr. Harrington bellowed. “How are you supposed to get into good colleges and universities with these?”

The first week of June was not a good week, ever, in Steve’s opinion. It was when grades were mailed out and he had to listen to the screaming for a full week.

“I had that concussion in the middle of the year, remember?” Steve asked. “That set my grades back a bit. But I thought I would take a year of community college and build my grades back up to get into the better schools.”

“No son of mine is going to a state school!” Mr. Harrington roared. “And you can forget about that summer internship at the company! I will not have tell others that you didn’t get into a proper school.”

Steve could feel his stomach sink to the base of spine. He didn’t like where this was going. At all.

“You will get a job,” Mr. Harrington continued to menace. “I don’t mean some cushy life guard bullshit where you sit in some high tower, looking pretty, either. A real job. Retail. Build character.”

“But I already told Mr. Jones at the community center that I would lifeguard again this summer,” Steve protested.

“You go back there and tell him you have better things to do with your time!” Mr. Harrington shouted. “That new mall opened up. Starcourt. You’ll find something there.” He leaned forward into Steve’s space. “Do I make myself clear?”

Steve gulped, but nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

“Good.”

Mr. Harrington turned on his heel and stormed back into his office. Mrs. Harrington stood at the edge of the room, almost swaying on her feet as she would move forward to comfort Steve, but then would change her mind. Back and forth.

Steve pinched his nose and rubbed the end. He looked up at her with dead eyes. “He’ll keep moving the goal posts. You know he will.”

This time she did surge forward. “You know it’s not like that. He only wants what’s best for you.”

“Best for me?” Steve murmured, barely holding back the tears. “Or what will make him look the best? Because I’m tired, Mom.”

“It’s hard,” Mrs. Harrington said, rubbing his arm gently. “But come autumn he’ll see how well you did and maybe he’ll let you try for the state school.”

Steve knew it was a lie or whatever that she was telling herself more than she was tell him.

He pinched and rubbed his nose, forcing back the tears. He wasn’t going to cry in front of either of his parents. It only enraged his father and prompted mocking from his mother.

Oh, she hid it under the guise of ‘tough love’ but it was all tough and no love.

He thought of Wayne and Eddie. Of how they didn’t have a lot of material possessions but they had each other and their love for each shone brightly.

Steve held up his chin and nodded. Then he grabbed his keys and wallet, forcing on his shoes.

“Where are you going?” his mother huffed. “Storming off like that after a fight with your father is so childish, Steven.”

Steve turned to her slowly and blinked. “To talk to Mr. Jones about not being able to lifeguard this year and go job hunting at the mall like Dad wants?”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re always so dramatic, Steven. I suppose that was why you took so well to it. Of course, if you had any real talent you would have gotten a more substantial role.”

He squeezed his hand around his keys, the ridges digging into his palm, as he fought down the bile that rose to his throat.

“I’ll be back for dinner,” Steve said through gritted teeth. He rushed out the door, careful not to slam it behind him.

He drove out to the community center and hit his steering wheel over and over as he cursed out his parents until he was exhausted.

He sighed and got out the car, making his way to front desk. “Hey, Janis, is Mr. Jones in today?”

Janis smiled at him. “Sure thing, sweetie. Just go on back.”

Steve caught Mr. Jones as he was coming back to his office.

“Hey, Steve!” Mr. Jones said cheerfully, coming up to him with a big smile. “You here for your schedule?”

Steve shook his head. “My dad didn’t like my grades and told me I had to get a real job. Sorry.”

“Shit, Steve, I’m sorry,” Mr. Jones said crumpling. “And there’s no chance he’ll let you do both?”

“No,” Steve said bitterly. “If he finds out I’m working here he’ll beat my ass. I wanted to come back, but I guess my dad had other plans.”

“Well, well,” a cruel voice said behind them, “it looks like you have an opening after all, Mr. Jones.”

Steve and Mr. Jones turned toward the voice slowly, knowing with complete dread who it was.

Billy Hargrove was leaning against the wall, arms folded and a giant smirk on his face.

“Looks like your loss is my gain, Harrington,” he said coolly.

Steve rolled his eyes. “Story of my life since you rolled into town, Hargrove. You stole my friends, the captain of the basketball team, hell you probably would have stolen my girl if she liked jocks instead of tortured artists or some shit. It ain’t new.”

“You’re just bitter that I’m the superior you in every way,” Billy said with a sneer. “The sooner you admit it, the less heartache you’ll have, pretty boy.”

Steve threw back his head and laughed. “I have other talents, asshole. I can draw, I can act, and I can fucking swim. While you were out there fucking anything with a pussy that would let your scaly ass, I was beating records and making it to nationals as part of our swim team. You are just some washed up surfer in desperate need a wave. I am a swimmer.”

He nodded to Mr. Jones who had a smug smile on his face.

Billy was taken aback. “So you do have a spine. Huh. I would have never guessed it. Not with Max and Munson doing your dirty work for you.”

Steve got right up in Billy’s face. “I didn’t go after you, dipshit,” his voice low and menacing. Quiet enough that only he could hear. “Because I just wanted to graduate. But now that I have that diploma, I’m more than ready throw hands with you. Plus we all know I had you against the ropes until you cheated by smashing a plate to my head.”

He patted Billy’s chest and waving goodbye to Mr. Jones, he walked out of there, chin held high.

****

Steve had gathered somewhere around a dozen or so applications to the stores that surrounded him and sat down in the food court to fill them out. His eyes were starting to go cross-eyed when Dustin came up to him and sat down across from him.

“Dude,” Dustin greeted. “What’s all this shit?”

Steve looked up at him and sighed. “Job applications. My dad wants me to get a summer job.”

“But you have a summer job,” Dustin replied with a frown. “The rec center. You’re a lifeguard.”

Steve sighed again and shook his head. “My dad was pissed that I only got into a couple of schools and not the good ones.”

Dustin frowned and tilted his head to the side. “Is that because of what happened with Billy?”

“That’s part of it,” Steve agreed. “But I was really counting on a sports scholarship and with how shitty everything got I didn’t get a single one.”

“But you went to nationals with your swimming though,” the gap-toothed kid grumbled.

Steve put down his pen and planted his hands on either side of his applications. “Look, bud, I get that you think you’re trying to help or whatever but my team came in last at nationals. In everything. No scout was going to give us so much as a passing glance. No sports scholarship plus missing the early acceptance deadline and having to wait for regular admissions means that I’m on a waiting list for most of the good schools, didn’t get in to the decent schools, and my dad won’t let me go to the community college. So here I am doing the best I can, okay?”

Dustin pouted but gave up on pushing the issue. He grabbed the applications and began looking through them.

“Hey!” Steve cried trying to get them back, but Dustin kept dodging him.

He set down three applications. “You can put in for all of if you want, but I’d focus on these three.” Scoops Ahoy, The Gap, and Shapiro’s.

Steve picked them and looked at them. “Why?”

“Those are going to be the ones that kids aren’t going to want to try for,” Dustin said. “And you have to get this job because of your dad. These are more likely to hire you.” He pointed to the ice cream shop. “That one is your best bet.”

Steve nodded. That was one he had been expecting to get too.

“So when are you leaving to nerd camp?” he asked, taking the applications from the kid.

“It’s called Camp Know Where,” Dustin scoffed. “Know as in k-n-o-w where. It’s really cool.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “That still doesn’t tell me when you’re going, dork.”

“Oh!” Dustin said, eyes wide. “Tomorrow. My mom is buying me the things I’ll need so I can leave bright and early.”

Steve’s expression softened. “I’m going to miss you, you know?”

Dustin nodded back. “I’m going to miss you, too.”

Someone called his name and he looked up. “It looks like my mom’s calling me. Good luck on the job search.”

Steve stood up and gave him a hug. “Have fun, okay?”

Dustin nodded and ran to catch up to his mom as Steve went back to his applications with a sigh. He really was going to miss that butthead.

****

Tag List: ELEVEN SLOTS OPEN

1- @mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @kultiras

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @blondie1006

5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @angels-of-hades

7- @mugloversonly @y4r3luv @greeniebean911 @birbsauce @acingthecounts

8- @cryptid-system @counting-dollars-counting-stars @ravenfrog @dreamercec

[eddiediazismyhusband]

I had to see it and suffer and now others must know as well. There is a gifset that one of T's fans made, I kid you NOT, the gifs of Buck they used are dead ass from the 'you wanna go for the title' kitchen scene with Eddie and then they added gifs of L from some show other than 911. And the comments are legit shit like...."I will never get over the way Buck looks at him' and 'oh that boy is so in love with his man' and 'that belt grab he wants him so bad' and the best of all...'as if he would ever look at anyone else including Eddie the way he's looking at Tommy here'

I can't

I'm legit terrified of these people. They absolutely know that is a Buddie scene and Buck is looking at and talking to Eddie in that scene. They've just decided to pretend and headcanon it as a BT scene. And have decided to gif it as if it's real! and tag it as their ship name. WHAT?!?! HOW THE HELL DID WE GET HERE!?!?! They're just out here straight up changing scenes to be about T and just expecting everyone to think that's normal. I'm terrified. This is cult level shit.

it absolutely is borderline cult activity from some of the fans.

now in the spirit of being fair it is not all of them, but the unfortunate fact is that the people coming across as having this cult-ish worship of tommy and lou ferringo jr are the loudest among them so we have to see their shit front and center.

i have blocked so many people and filtered out so many tags to prevent seeing that stuff bc at the end of the day it’s either just pure delusion or rage bait, so i’ve found best to ignore it and not give these people a platform.

i know it’s hard to, and i am definitely guilty of not ignoring some of the crazy stuff, but when you do it can relieve so much stress.

At this point (especially with clownery like that) it’s probably best to just block the user and ignore it… bc at that point, that’s just blatant stupidity that they’re watching buddie scenes and trying to act like it’s s scene between their ship 💀💀

i definitely understand it’s annoying to see and hear all the time but that’s why i stay away from fandom twitter and instagram, and keep my tumblr dash to strictly my mutuals/people i’ve intentionally followed… yes sometimes things leak through the cracks but it’s often much less impactful that intentionally seeking it out (if that makes sense)

just take a deep breath and keep your head up, anon. these people will be proven wrong sooner or later, we just need to be patient and ignore their bullshit the best we can 💕💕

[doraambrose]

When it comes to the Victim Blaming Grief coping one of the big things that makes it an issue is that he actually did it to Jason's face (in Hush as it was retconned to be Jason he said that too).

And, when Jason comes back it stops being grief for the dead, it becomes grief for the wounded. And people victim blame people who were hurt too. This is how they cope, however this coping mechanism always hurts the victim and is a genuinely bad coping mechanism that shouldn't be used. It's harmful. It's harmful to the victim and it is harmful for the other people who might be grieving. It's probably one of the most selfish coping mechanisms.

I've experienced people using this method in real life and it's rough. And it's toxic. Saying you can't criticize the way someone grieves is flawed because you are rarely the only one grieving and I personally have been harmed during a period of shared grief. And I am sure other people have been too because grief brings out the bad in people but that doesn't mean all is forgiven.

Like, imagine if Jason was just comatose and all the victim blaming happened and then Jason just woke up and found out all Bruce had been saying about him? Would Jason's feelings be justified then?

Also, saying the deceased person doesn't matter when they die disregards a lot of religious and spiritual beliefs around honoring the dead.

I feel like Jason is as justified as any other person harmed when someone copes with toxic way in being upset. Jason's death is also a traumatic thing that happened to him. Centering Bruce's feelings while disregarding Jason's as unjustified doesn't feel fair. Especially considering the incident where Bruce took Jason to Ethiopia to try to trigger Jason's memories of what brought him back without his consent.

(Sorry if this was a bit much, I've experienced a decent amount of the bad sides of grief in my life and feel strongly about it)

Okay, so I feel like I need to re answer my previous post because I was struggling to find the right words and also at work, but I think I've figured it out.

One thing to keep in mind is when we talk about feelings, grief, and emotions, there's not a set right or wrong. I also mentioned that I don't like the word justified in this case because it sounds like right or wrong. I did use it at the end, but I'll get into that here. This is a very gray area subject matter and that makes it tricky and you're never gonna find an answer that everyone agrees with because it's not really as fact based as if I said "batman wears a cape sometimes" or "dick grayson is nightwing".

The first thing that comes to mind for me is what my therapist tells me when I feel guilt over feelings. She would tell me "anything you're feeling is valid, you're allowed to be upset, angry, sad, jealous, etc. It's how you act on those feelings.. something I can't remember atm lol". So when I say jason isn't justified, I'm saying that he's allowed to be upset and angry and his feelings are valid, it's not right to actively take it out on the family and hold it against them and be sort of malicious or harmful. And i know theyve done that plus some towards him, but its important to remember that you can only control your own actions and even if someone is being toxic and harmful, that doesnt mean you should too. I think I didn't explain that right and there was some miscommunication. I also wanted to explain why I felt that jason would be angry.

As for this comment, both of these asks were right. Grief can be harmful and toxic. And before I say what I'm going to say next, keep in mind that I'm discussing grief alone and not any of the stuff post utrh that Bruce has done to jason that's harmful and abusive. This toxic kind of grief doesn't make the person a bad person. They can't help it. It's your brain going crazy to try and cope with something traumatic. When my dog died, I wanted to sue my vet, even though they didn't really so anything wrong. It's easier to have someone in front of you to blame. I'm not saying it's right or okay, but it does happen and it can be harmful, but you're not a bad person for it. (In Bruce's case, he's a bad person for all the other shit he's pulled outside of this)

I think these two asks are like at the opposite ends of this topic and I think it's something that you can meet in the middle with. So basically

Yes, grief can be toxic and harmful, but it's also very much a subconscious phenomenon and it's extremely personal and different for everyone and alot of times, people are unaware of what they're doing.

Because of that, jason can be hurt by it, he can be angry,etc. His feelings are valid, But it's not fair to activey hold that over Bruce forever, which he doesn't, this seems more like a fanon thing btw. But it also doesn't hurt to apologize afterwards.

I think when you say that the idea of not critiquing the way someone grieves is flawed, it comes off as unempathetic. Because as someone who has had to grieve alot of the past few years, it's the worst feeling. And your brain is literally scrambling to cope with it so you don't actively lose your shit and sometimes it ends up with some unhealthy Coping mechanisms. And you're usually unaware of what you're doing. I feel like you're not thinking of how the other person is feeling or what they're going through. And fair is fair, they need to see what you're feeling too and actively try to remedy things at some point, there just needs to be more patience and empathy all around and trying to remember that this person is not always intentionally being malicious.

I'm a religious person. So I see where youre coming from, but nobody said the deceased doesn't matter. I think the point was more that you don't have to worry as much about how that person is feeling or thinking because they've moved on to a better place, you should focus on self care and doing what's best for your mental health.

I am also 100% not trying to center around Bruce's feelings and discredit jasons, in fact, the last post was 100% about jasons feelings.

In summary, there's not "justified" or "right" or "wrong". It's super complicated, varies from person to person, and is a tricky subject matter. Everyone's feelings are valid and there definitely needs to be more empathy and patience on all sides, but there are still actions that have been made on both sides that aren't the best and can be hurtful or toxic. I hope this all makes sense and I worded it right :)

[amethystfairy1]

In TTSBC, where are Martyn's parents? I know it was mentioned briefly in Railcart Roses that they worked a lot. Are they still in his life, dead, absent, distant, or something else?

p.s. I re-read Railcart Roses too often. I just love it so much <3

Martyn's parents are absolutely still in his life, and I actually wrote a worldbuildy tumblr post about it months ago. But just to save you the digging, here's the same text! I had it typed up in my TTSBC notes file for myself for reference 😆

On Martyn's parents:

His parents are pretty standard (I know, shocking) both his parents are middle school teachers, and they also run a tutoring/summer school center in his hometown, so they're happy that he went into a career in education too! They're actually thrilled that he's working at a university now, they're secretly hoping he might take some classes on the discounted rate and get his Masters but he doesn't want too, they both keep pestering him about it, though. 😆

Martyn kept the vast majority of his relationships a secret from them, and since they worked a crazy amount both being teachers and running the tutoring center, they never really caught on about just how wild their sons love life was. Martyn also wasn't nearly as extra as Scott was about his relationships, typically he went for more physical flings, and he'd cut and run before things got too emotional for his liking. They do know about a couple of his exes, though, mostly the ones from college, and of course they know about what happened with Scott!

Martyn's Mom knew it would never end well when they started dating, his Dad was cautiously optimistic. When it crashed and burned Martyn's Mom held it over his Dad's head for years, lovingly of course.

They've both been trying to get Martyn to start dating again (THEY WANT GRANDBABIES) but Martyn hasn't told them about Ren yet considering how slow their relationship is going...plus he knows his parents well enough to know they'd want to meet Ren ASAP...Martyn denounced ever wanting to date again to both of his parents multiple times, and yet here he is with Ren, so until he's sure Ren would be able to survive the encounter, he doesn't want to put him in that sort of situation. (let's ignore Martyn figuratively and literally falling ass backward into multiple meet-the-family scenarios 😆)

Martyn is also an only child! He doesn't have a close relationship with any extended relatives either, not even grandparents, they all passed away before he was born. It's always just been him and his parents, so the collision with Ren's comically huge family is culture shock for him.

As a fun little side-fact, Martyn is actually really close with Scott's Grandma, and calls her 'Grandma' as well, considering he and Scott were best friends basically their entire lives and Martyn's parents worked so much, he spent a lot of time over at Grandma Major's place and she also treats him like a grandson.

So y'know, when they snuck off to get ear piercings sophomore year without permission Martyn got raked over the coals by Grandma Major while his own parents were basically just like 'Maybe ask for permission next time you decide to poke holes in yourself, ok? Make sure you use the disinfectant they gave you, do you want us to get you a set of hypoallergenic studs in case you have a reaction?'

TL:DR: Scott never knew his parents and so neither do we, Martyn's parents are teachers who work a lot but they are very loving and very chill and very much want their son to get hitched at some point.

[wildflowerteas]

I don't really know where to begin with this i just feel like if i don't say anything I'm going to actually explode so I'm going to shout into the void but I've been agonizing over this comment i got last week that said somethigna long the lines of

'you do this [ thing that you could do better-messy POV switching ], but your writing itself is great!' and 'this is similar to [ insert popular fic ]--and by that I mean it's also good!' and '[ this thing you do ] is confusing/not done well . . . but despite that, i still really enjoy your writing!'

and even though they very clearly meant kindly by it i just zeroed in on the word choice ( like 'decent' and 'despite' ) and the back and forth and the by-all-standards very light criticism and absolutely picked it apart and swallowed the negativity and i can't think about anything else andhaven't been able to think of anything else it's just been on loop in my head since then

i'm just so sick of myself right now because this would not be such a big deal if it wasn't in my nature to always assume the absolute worst of people, and if i wasn't so self-centered and pessimistic and even if it somehow was negative or shady i know i'd end up swallowing it with a smile and saying thank you anyway even though I've agonized about it for almost a week because i have no backbone and all my life I've been mediocre at everything i do and honestly i was like wow this is familiar and it all felt like such a needed reality check for me even if it wasn't meant to be but i feel so disoriented and lost

and i'm pretty sure it was well-meaning and meant to be a compliment but I'm just absolutely tearing it apart and trying to find negativity like a goddamn truffle pig which is so pathetic like I keep saying writing is something i do for myself but I'm so affected by other people that i straight up haven't been able to respond to comments because every time i open up my inbox i just get this overwhelming sense of guilt and dread and i really don't know what to do about it i feel so awful for thinking this way about their comment and by extension, them as a person, because it's so mean and self-centered of me. and the fact that i can't bring myself to open my notifs to respond to everyone else's comments is no one's fault but my own and i feel bad about that too goddddd

none of this matters!!!! truly!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's not serious and it's just a hobby and its not my career and it's not like i got slammed by a critic who's going to ruin my chances for ever and ever i cant believe I'm acting like this it's not rational

i think i just need sleep, or a bowl of my best friend's mom's chicken biryani. that could fix everything.

[miupow]

hey hey😽

haven't been on tumblr in a bit + i quit writing but i kinda wanted to share this thought with someoneeee hehehe esp since it's summer😵‍💫 it's kinda more centered towards chubby!reader but.. i guess it'd work with most people (literally all my friends have this issue!!!! halloooo!!)

imagine taking pervy!bestie beomgyu with you shorts shopping, and you pick up a few pairs.. nothing out of the usual, n as you try them on, twirling around, sitting to see if they're gonna be too tight on your thighs, beomgyu painfully notices two things.. how short every pair is.. and the gapping..><

usually, he'd mention it, tell you that maybe the gap was too bad.. but really! he had been growing a crush on you.. and maybe just maybeeee.. he'd think about it for weeks after, just groaning at the thought of the lace on the waistband of your panties. and how you were sooooo oblivious, and maybe that was gross..

whatever, maybe he was gross too :3

haiii elise!!! <33 ^_^ i'm sorry it took me a bit to answer this ask eeek.. been fighting major posting block >< hope you're doing well ml

ooouuu save me pervy whipped bsf beomgyu... save me

perv bg literally lives rent free in my head every day u don't understand he's an even bigger nastier perv than kai or soobin !!!! unlike them he can keep his cool when he's being pervy lol he can act like everythings fine while his mushy pervy brain's exploding inside n he's so horny he has to jerk off in the bathroom :p

[ssreeder]

Hi! The last chapter was sooooo good. Thank you for posting it <3 your work is amazing and i love it so much. But seriously I literally screamed when I saw that the new chapter was out and I couldn’t wait to get home so I had to start reading it at uni 🙃. You have portrayed Sokka and Zuko so well and I’m so proud of how far they and all of the adults have come. I love how protective Hakoda is of Zuko now, it’s so cute. I have to say I never really liked Jet but you have me very invested in his storyline and the conversation between him and Zuko was just amazing. I do miss Toph and am super excited for azula to make an appearance. Well this was just my way to tell you how much I love your work and how this fic is my Roman Empire. I’d leave you a thousand kudos if I could.

I would eat your thousand kudos with my bare hands, I love you anon. I’m glad you enjoyed the last chapter!

I do think Hakoda’s desire to be a better dad is fueling his desire to look out for Zuko because he has FINALLY realized after a million wordcount that Zuko is a good guy & Sokka is completely and utterly in love with him.

It took him a while but he finalllyyyy got it lol... good for him!

Toph will be back next chapter!! She had to go visit her ‘parents’ like in canon because she got ‘their letters’ when the Long Feng was arrested. Fortunately! she won’t be coming back to a coup, unfortunately! She’s going to have to face some of her buried feelings & visit Jet.

Excited for girls chapter woho! Suki & Katara gossip is so fun to write I can’t wait for them haha.

[stuckinapril]

me stoically navigating my way through drama bc bigger things are ahead and it’s not my fault people are dumb

[buttercupshands]

just some LoV sitting in the long lost bar in Ultra Impact in clothes that they didn't wear yet

[spiderfreedom]

Not a female separatist but I'm forever grateful to them for introducing the idea of just centring women in our lives. Focusing on women artists, scientists, writers, showrunners, businessowners... and where we don't see women in those positions, asking why, and what can we do to help. Focusing on female friends and female family. Building relations and community among women to help women. Spending your $$ money $$ on women. You don't need to be a full separatist to incorporate this into your life, and imagine what women could accomplish if we just decided to focus on uplifting women as a class.

[iftitah]

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